Pie Hard

This week Pie Hard mainlines the Collingwood speedball, unloads on embarrassing wizard hats, sneaks into the Daicos' dentist box, carb loads with Isaac Quaynor and generally peaks too early to a soundtrack of Aaron James folk songs

We settle on a theme for Collingwood's terrifying burst dominance, discuss mid-season recruits, a return to the Magpie nest for Dermie, celebrate Ned Long's game of shrugs, Oleg's Bunnings sausage, and the plantar fascia fix that was there all along

Pie Hard goes horizontal to dream Bobby patting babies, Nick's protective droogs, Maynard dissing North, Daicos family dentistry, 90's in-game dining, and our evergreen diatribe against the Dome

We head to Rome to anoint the first-ever Collingwood Pope, survive a bout of rigor mortis out west, unveil fresh sponsor kickbacks for Big Ned, decode the club's latest Wadeless injury report, and ask the Harders how to indoctrinate the next generation of Magpie tragics

We exhume the Geelong game, dissect Derek Hine's Tassie makeover, Jaidyn Stephenson's Uber Eats addiction and De Goey's malaise, whilst looking forward to provoking the purple haze with profound disrespect at the selection table

We chat Anzac Day angles, the legend of the Collingwood Cougars, magpie autobiographies, golfing activations, globetrotter handballs, next-gen prospects, and a mouth-watering Pie Hard free agency sales pitch

We chat music licensing with our lawyers, enjoy kick to kick on the Gabba, reflect on our love affair with Jamie Elliott, explain the resurgence of Darcy Moore, uncover a scamming Eddie McGuire, share our tip for the Anzac medallist and relive the infamously 'safe' Waislitz Balls.

Snub-nosed revolvers and the end of Carlton, Gladiator Peter, Josh's dream home, zero-carb Carp, breaking bad caravans, choose your own adventures and the transcendent joy of littering at the G.

We review the Bulldogs pretend blockbuster, defend Mason, imbibe Siegfried and Roy pints, report on Big Rigs, welcome a new Big M, unshackle Petracca and prescribe psychedelics to a tormented Magpie tragic.

We lift the lid on how eggs benedict killed Palpatine's Port, chat LED Tunnels, Ranking Big M's, Hating Jack Riewoldt, Loving Xander Maguire, Crosisca bumps and the launch of Doctor Pie Hard.

We introduce Bio-Hacking to the Pies, endorse pickle juice, denounce round zero, chat shit-stirring Fly, plus run the ruler over Craig David jumper presentations and the latest from Uncle Tony Shaw.

We chat De Goey's groin-strengthening getaway in Doha, Daicos in Santorini, Membrey's arms, Junky recruits, Wade's physique, the new boss in town, a sponsor update and we go all in on season 2025

Pie Hard returns to ride the Daicos family bronco, analyse 'that' goal and the Carlton win, our standout rookies, the Buckley auction, veteran report cards, Fly's hard edge, to draft or to trade, plus our rating of the top ten Magpie marks this century. Giddyup!

Pie Hard returns mid hangover to analyse the Collingwood malaise, blame the fixture, send an SOS to Graham Wright, denounce John Farnham, query Fly's writer's room, lament game style deficiencies, retire old veterans, compliment only two players and generally remember how good last year was

In Part 2, we chat the redemption of John Noble, Darcy Moore in Speedos, Dane Swan's foray into food television, Murphy's concussions, De Goey's digs, plus our suggestion for Craig McRae's new motivational theme for Collingwood's premiership defence, and our Ned Guy ‘he'll surprise you' picks for the most improved player for the upcoming season

[Part 1 of 2] We return for a new season of pie hard with the pod version of a double-header. We describe our experience of getting clean off Collingwood post Grand Final and then relapsing again and again, revisit the post-premiership orgasm, rate our favourite offseason narratives, discuss Graham “Contiki” Wright's Euro Gap Year, breakdown Collingwood's recent foray into the cinematic universe, plus we chat offseason movements, Mini Mihocek, Craig McRae's self-imposed use by date and Isaac Quaynor's phenomenal summer

We wrap up an immortal season marinated in red wine, stuffed with wholesome, and basted in the succulent juices of ultimate glory in the most indulgent breakdown of Collingwood's 16th premiership yet

We celebrate a bumper grand final week with all the hard news, hard asks, hard predictions and hard plans leading into Saturday's mega climax 

We marinate in the glory of a special preliminary final victory, discuss the relationship debit and credit system ahead of grand final week, the art of Cuddleball, our run in with some old saints, De Goey the giant slayer, the loss of McStay, and revisit your favourite red wine replays from Collingwood's one-point victory against GWS

We take preliminary final lessons from mythology, necromancy, tattoo artists, miracle hamstrings and Colombian remedies, plus our attempts to look good, smell good, feel good, play good, and we find out what's on your mind ahead of Collingwood's 11th prelim in 22 years

We spend the week off renaming Collingwood babies and magpie sculptures, discussing the Maynard shitstorm, deciphering the new culinary gameplan, preparing the premiership poster, and planning a glorious weekend of self-care and injury schadenfreude

Pie Hard returns for a bumper finals series featuring Qualifying Final predictions, selection conundrums, private jets, moon phases, Grand Final entertainment, Nick's knee cream, Fly's keynote and Oleg's underpants

Pie Hard turns to the people to address your questions and anxieties, feat. dirty grand final apparel, Nick VS Josh, our preferred finals matchup, Fly's mind games, a Malthouse return, ice cold Crownies, Jarrod 'druid' Wade, and our plans for a Collingwood army fleet of lime scooters

Pie Hard rediscovers the club's mojo with a brand new Terrace Talk, juicy red wine replay, Ginni and the recipe of team selection, Bobby's break-out, the Moore injury, Nick's bone broth, Fly's man crush, Ken Done pastels, and is it finally time for a Jarrod Wade badge?

We bemoan the lack of red wine, unpick the team malaise, and dissect the three act structure of the Collingwood season, plus a secret visit to the halls of power, navigating life after wholesome, Damien's Daicos family connection, and our foolproof recipe for getting the team back on track

We chat apparel jinxes, ins & outs, the Howe move and the Cox question plus Daicos contract extensions, Jeff Browne hair extensions, the IQ fragrance, Magpie cookware and Heretier's new business

We chat love bombing Fly and bully boy Ken, goon bags or aperol spritz, football therapy, Nathan's string, that Beau McCreery kick, the Mason Seinfeld jibe, Graham's signing spree, plus the deliciously low stakes Carlton game and finding the gumption to mention the P word

Pie Hard turns seventy with more pizza pie and red wine replay, plus kid talk, Collingwood crocs, Daicos diary, Nathan's imminent return, the beauwatch extension and our thoughts on Port the beverage and the opponent

We chat Belarusian prison tattoos, Daicos spheres, country footy bashings, Peter dancing in the aisles, Pendlebury pizza, Ginnivan's future, our IQ admiration club and Gabriel Gaté inspired magpie cooking shows

We chat about the key to getting Taylor Swift down to Collingwood, edging, contrast therapy, weaponising happiness, the Ben King fitness test and the brands turning to the Pies to endorse their products

In a special bye episode of Pie Hard, we count down the hardest moments from the first half of the season

We enlist AI to help decipher a rare loss, debate the pros and cons of segregating fans, why bigger slides are better, the problem with Grundy's portrait, the players code, flu fatigue and the lessons of Jens Voigt, non hungover contract extensions, shitty ghost written biographies, the beauty of the bye, plus the cultural high water mark of 2000's Sunsilk commercials featuring Matthew Lokan.

We chat second teams, Carlton Schadenfreude, Pies media watch, wholesome gods and the unlikely Collingwood totem, plus our bombshell road trip strategy, the Pie Hard time capsule, milestone men and the Steele biopic

We chat about love bombing Marvel Stadium, cannibal football sides, Carlton sapping the vibe, adorable Ash, floating stadium parties, hotel mini bar hacks, Bezos' free pies, the river of Collingwood hate slime, and in honour of his 300th game, we share some lesser known Steele Sidebottom facts

We chat about missing games due to cursed in-flight wifi, match day indulgences, how not to approach magpie legends in the wild, plus we explore Jungian archetypes, animal menageries, red wine replays and our genuine love of the wholesome Pies

We chat Camilla and the coronation pies, 'striker' Mihocek, the Collingwood Benjamin Button, sinister swans and the return of the boo debate, Jeff Browne's dicky groin, plus our guide to tailgate parties and surviving the fixture solstice

Welcome to Daicosic Park, a podcast suspended in amber resin, featuring both the Adelaide and Anzac day games, the Collingwood Richo, player doxing, the unhateable Pies, e-bike bliss, Darcy orations, sad sundays, Flying V's, disgusting umpiring, bean bag reviews, medicinal remedies plus the celebrity chef race and more Pie culture than the American 60 minutes

We taste test Gather round weet-bix & wines, carwash tube men, 'Lucky' injuries, the old ruckman debate, another fucking basketballer recruit, plus Beauwatch hits the road, your most versatile pies and our favourite all time Anzac day memories

We chat about Albino wallabies, schedule losses, PR Hyperbole, Harlem Globetrotters, Tom Browne's Collingwood mole, the Pies forgotten ruck hope, selling home games, a team full of Daicoses, pieswashing, Collingwood's home in Adelaide, and our plans for 4:20pm Sunday 

We chat about afterglow champagne, dick and balls graffiti, removing the lid, supporter beast mode, bullshit boundary signs, WHE and the maligned magpies, body language shaming with Peter Frampton, plus Nick and the Michelangelo finger

We chat about Darcy the Vampire Slayer, sensory overload, the MCG scent, basting the opposition, key bumps in the outer, plastered Peter, dressing for football in March and Terrace Talk returns

McRae's difficult second album, anointing the Collingwood Ataturk, predicting the next cult pie, ugly ass wharf pylons, the AFL merch shakeup, moving Mihocek magnets, invoicing Ed Sheeran and our honest season predictions

In a new episode of Pie Hard, Alex and Damien count down the hardest moments from Collingwood's offseason

We chat with Paul Williams about his bromance with Graham Wright, Nathan Buckley's basketball skills, those running goals, player curfews and nightclub bans, end of season trip bonding, rooming with Monkey, coach Tony Shaw's visionary game plans, the meeting with Mick Malthouse that sealed his fate at Collingwood, moving to Sydney, Bloods culture, getting sacked from Carlton via courier and how he's rekindled his love for the pies

Peter McKenna the Rastafarian, Fly Spray, Collingwood royalty, the big Steele, gigantic portion sizes, the three-martini lunch, second favourite teams and MCG Magpie flash mobs.

Heath Shaw is the only member of the Collingwood Rat Pack to reach 300 AFL games. We chat with Heater about the secret to his longevity, playing in front of the Magpie Army, what he'd call his autobiography, his bitter exit from the Pies and the team sacrifice that led to the ultimate glory.

Gerard and the Collingwood Grim Reaper, the Jolimont groove, Beau "The Claw" McCreery, the rising trend of unofficial suburban player meet and greets, and more last minute heroics from Jamie Elliott and the procrastinating Pies.

For our 50th episode, we bookend a truly memorable win against the trash talking Demons, record raw from the streets of Collingwood as we walk to the game, discuss what makes the ultimate footy pub and explore the club's dark history of hotel ownership, plus contract trigger clauses, free agency bites, Grundy's sacrifice, and we review the Magpies' 11th win in a row

'That' Jamie Oliver Elliott Goal, mid season draft party crashers, Lethal's sleepless night, Daicosian calendar re-re-visited, breakaway rebel leagues and our selection and finals crystal ball

Collingwood hypnosis, Daicos in Hollywood, condiment chaos in Adelaide, anti-germ sponsored content, Leon, salacious trade rumour mongering and Scott Pendlebury call signs

We roll out the Robbie Williams red carpet, celebrate another Magpie renaissance, discuss Saverio's Hall of Fame snub, Taylor's new look, McStay's underwhelming Wikipedia page, Fly's family vibes, post-injury body language, plus introducing 'Shawry' the play, and your dream Magpie musicals.