The Heart Is A Muscle Podcast

Welcome to "The Heart is a Muscle" podcast, where we dive deep into the complexities of relationships and explore the profound nature of the human heart. In this podcast, we're discussing Healing Shutdown in Relationships: Real-Life Solutions Revealed. Healing shutdown is a term used to describe when people become emotionally frozen in their relationships. This can lead to decreased intimacy, communication problems, and resentment coming between you and your partner. We'll discuss: How to recognize when you or your partner is in shutdown How to overcome emotional shutdown How to communicate effectively The use of parts work (internal family systems) in healing shutdown Other methods that help you resolve shutdown in your relationship.

Welcome to "The Heart is a Muscle" podcast, where we dive deep into the complexities of relationships and explore the profound nature of the human heart. Explore the fascinating realm of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, delve into the concept of Parts Work, and discover the profound impact these approaches can have on healing mental health within relationships. In this transformative episode, we're diving deep into the revolutionary field of psychotherapy that's changing the way we understand our inner selves and interpersonal dynamics. Join us as we unpack the core principles of Parts Work, a therapeutic model based on IFS that views the mind as a complex system of parts, each with its own emotions, needs, and stories. Building strong, healthy relationships is a cornerstone of our well-being, and this episode shines a light on how Parts Work can be powerful tools in fostering empathy, understanding, and healing within partnerships, friendships, and family connections. Whether you're struggling with communication barriers, emotional triggers, or past wounds affecting your relationships, this episode offers insights and techniques to embark on a transformative journey. Key highlights of this episode: Introduction to Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy and its creator, Richard C. Schwartz. Unpacking the concept of Parts Work: understanding subpersonalities or "parts" within ourselves. Real-life stories of individuals who have experienced profound healing through IFS and Parts Work. Exploring the intersection of Parts work and relationship therapy: how addressing our internal parts can positively impact our interactions with others. Practical tips and exercises for integrating Parts Work into your personal growth and relationship-building journey.

Welcome to "The Heart is a Muscle" podcast, where we dive deep into the complexities of relationships and explore the profound nature of the human heart. In this insightful installment, Jordin and Josef explore the mesmerizing world of 'Non-Verbal Communication in Relationships' – a compelling topic that unravels the hidden language of the heart. Join us as we unravel the mysterious signals, unspoken emotions, and subtle cues that play a profound role in every relationship. Through engaging stories and expert analysis, we shed light on how non-verbal communication, from facial expressions to body language, carries the weight of truth and authenticity. Discover the art of active listening, the power of empathetic gestures, and the importance of emotional attunement to deepen your connections with loved ones. Together, we delve into the nuances of non-verbal cues, empowering you with the tools to decipher unexpressed feelings and build stronger, more meaningful bonds. Uncover the ways to bridge communication gaps, mend misunderstandings, and foster a deeper sense of intimacy with those you cherish. Whether you're in a romantic relationship, friendship, or family dynamic, the insights shared in this episode will enrich your interactions and transform your connections. Learn how to use non-verbal communication as a vehicle for empathy, understanding, and love. Gain practical tips to cultivate emotional intelligence, strengthen trust, and nurture harmonious relationships that stand the test of time. Join us on this heartfelt journey of 'Non-Verbal Communication in Relationships,' and unlock the language of the heart for lasting and profound connections.

We asked Chat GDP to give us a list of the most challenging questions about relationships, and in this episode we riff off the 7 most common questions – which include things like: What are some common misconceptions about relationships? How do you know you're ready for a committed relationship? How can you keep intimacy alive even if you've been together for a while? Lots of great discussion in this one!

We've been traveling and living life separately for a couple weeks. In this episode, we give an update of our relationship & what it's like be apart. AND ALSO - have an interesting discussion about Jordin giving her number away to someone else. It's a juicy one you don't wanna miss. Enjoy :)

What does “success” actually mean in a relationship? Well, there are sure as hell a lot of MYTHS around what success looks like – for instance, duration or simply just not breaking up. But the thing is, a relationship can absolutely be a success even if it only lasts a short time. In this episode, Josef and I share our thoughts on what ACTUALLY makes a relationship “successful.”

It's official, ya'll. Josef and I are selling all our shit and going full nomad. Obvi, this is a big life change worthy of some big conversations and negotiations. We get into the vulnerabilities of how we are adjusting, the things we're learning, and what ground rules we've had to set together to navigate this adventure.

Why tf should we even care about relationships? They're hard. They're a headache. Hell is other people. Why are we doing this again? Josef & I cover this topic from all KINDS of different angles. And we also cover what your options are when you are evolving and your partner decidedly *isn't* Lots of cutting edge thought in this episode!

Josef & I get into how energy work can combine with seggs to create an *off-the-charts* experience. ‘Nuff said. Enjoy

Everybody knows boundaries are important in relationships, nobody knows how to set them properly

If you are a masculine creature or if you love a masculine creature, LISTEN TO THIS EPISODE. Josef lays down the mfing LAW when it comes to the 5 Sacred Masculine Oaths that will invoke the healthy masculine (which our world needs SO much more of, by the way). We also dip our toes in the 5 Divine Feminine Oaths as well. You don't wanna miss this one.

Welcome to SEASON FOUR, ya'll!! We kick this season off by talking about something that isn't talked about enough: loneliness in relationships. Because just because you are in a relationship DOES NOT mean you don't feel lonely. We'll cover the signs of loneliness as well as talk about our (recent) vulnerable experience with loneliness in OUR relationship and how that played out. Lot's of good stuff in this one

The tension of everythingggggg, right? Fuuuuck me. Why do relationships have to be so TENSE sometimes? Why does LIFE have to be so tense sometimes? Sometimes life just gets tense. Especially right before a big uplevel. This episode is all about helping you navigate the tension of your relationship, of your life, and of your healing journey in a way that actually CONNECTS you deeper to yourself + others. It IS possible and it IS magical. We want everyone to know how to do this. Enjoy :)

What an EPISODE WE HAVE HERE FOLKS. We start off by talking about The Divine Feminine Mirror and how that can get some relationships in trouble when they don't know how to work with it. AND THEN we just go OFF on masc/fem polarity – our vulnerable experience with it, how we see it playing out in the world, and the controversial opinions we both have about it. You honestly might want to grab a pen and paper to take some notes. LOTS of great gems in this one. Enjoy :)

Snuggle up and get ready because in this episode we talk about sexytimes. This is a very vulnerable episode where Jordin shares some experiences she's been having with her sexuality for the first time with Josef. Yup. This is one of those episodes where it's a real-life conversation we are having in real-time. You're going to laugh, you're going to cry, and you might even get turned on. Enjoy :)

It's hard when one partner is in a go-getter part of their cycle and the other is in a resting part of their cycle, because when you're out of sync with one another it is easy for resentments and judgements to build. But being out of sync is normal – a relationship is between two individuals after all, and it's unrealistic to expect both of you to be in the same phase of life at all times. In this episode, Josef and I talk about what it's like for us to be out of sync and how we are learning to navigate it. Enjoy :)

Just like every person has a psychological shadow, every relationship has a shadow as well. It's all the dynamics happening in the unconscious that we either don't want to be or haven't learned how to be aware of yet. And it is JUICY. In this episode we give an example of how our shadow plays out in our relationship, as well as give tips on how to identify and navigate the shadow of your own relationship, too. I think you're really going to like this one. Enjoy :)

Josef is going to lay down some WISDOM about the sacred masculine. He's doing some massive work around helping men embody more of their healthy masculinity and this episode lays the foundation of what you need to know to bring your own healthy masculinity to life. Towards the end we also talk about the role the feminine plays in this as well. Enjoy :)

Today we are going to be talking about some groundbreaking new philosophical work that we are putting together (mostly Jordin hehe) that will help you understand yourself and your parts on a whole new level. Once you and your partner can understand the dynamics at play in your unique inner kingdoms, it will be so much easier to get on the same page even on the hardest topics to discuss. Lots of pure, solid gold in this one, folks! Enjoy :)

Josef and I get into the specifics and details of some of the hard conversations we've had - letting you in to our inner sanctum to witness what our relationship is REALLY like. We also talk about how to have hard conversations in general with your partner. Hard conversations are messy. They just are. But there is a way to navigate that mess in a way that leads both of you closer together. Enjoy :)

Josef & I interrupt our regularly scheduled program to pop in and talk about our reflections of 2022 and our projections for 2023. Basically: 2022 = a whole fucking lot 2023 = Josef is getting huge and Jordin is dancing life as it comes Enjoy :)

Get ready to get tender! In a world (inner and outer) full of judgement...where can we find the tenderness our heart needs the most? How can we find our way out of the maze of our own judgement? TONS of good gems in this one! Enjoy :)

This episode is way more entertaining than it's title, I promise ;) We've both been operating under the false belief that every relationship reaches a peak, and then it begins to steadily decline. Turns out, nope. Turns out a reality exists where a relationship can just keep getting better and better and BETTER. It feels like Josef and I have unlocked something super special here, and we talk allllll about it in this episode! Enjoy! Jordin + Josef

Josef started the next leg of his hero's journey in a BIG WAY! He went to a magical place (not telling where!) and came back a new person. Rather, he came back more of HIMSELF--more himself that I have ever seen him. In this episode, Josef and I recount his journey and explore what adventures might be next ;) Enjoy! - Jordin + Josef

We've left you hanging in anticipation for what this big move down to California will mean for our relationship. Jordin was concerned about losing her grounding in her power. Josef was worried Jordin wasn't going to like CA. And that was back in August! Well. It's time to continue the story. Even though we've dropped the ball on sharing new episodes with you, we have still been recording them! So here's the first episode we recorded shortly after Jordin reunited with Josef in California. Enjoy! :) Jordin + Josef

A chapter is closing for Josef and I. Oregon Jordin and Oregon Josef no longer exist (except, I mean, 4th-dimensionally in our inner world but that is a whole other conversation). Now it is time for California Jordin and California Josef to come together and see for themselves what magic is waiting for them and between them. In this podcast, we reflect upon our last chapter, and get real about the tension we are holding for all the unknown in our new chapter. There will be wobbles. But there will also be love. So much love. Enjoy :)

Gift giving can be a weird sticking point in relationships. You don't always know what to get your person, and it can also breed resentment if a gift is expected. Not to mention sometimes a gift lands and sometimes it really doesn't. This can get awkward for both the receiver and the giver. But boy, when a gift really lands...SUCH a great feeling! In this episode, Josef and I talk about our experience with giving gifts in relationship -- the good, the bad, and the returned. Enjoy! :)

This is an episode for the masculine in all of us that is trying so hard to get his shit straight but the harder he tries the more wiggly it gets. I speak in jest but honestly...this is a really hard spot to be in, for the masculine especially. In this episode, Josef talks vulnerably about some of the stuff that he is going through and YA'LL -- you don't want to miss it!! Enjoy :)

Sexual revelations, ya'll! I (Jordin) am having a WHOLE experience with the masculine INSIDE of me (energetically speaking of course). And this is causing profound ripples of healing for the feminine inside of me. I'm experiencing new sexual experiences that are outside of my trauma and I just didn't think it was going to be possible. In this episode, I tell Josef all about it and get his take. Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

Sooooo...we're moving! To Orange County, CA. Josef got a job down there and hey, I can work from anywhere so we are going on an adventure :) HOWEVER, we'll be spending 7 weeks apart from one another - this episode is one week in, reflecting on what has changed -- we were both surprised how MUCH changed so quickly. Also, we are doing this transition a little unconventionally and asking ourselves the hard questions like, "Is this still working for us?" Enjoy!! :)

Having a "conscious relationship" does NOT mean both of you have become totally enlightened and transcended your humanity and have ascended to two spiritual beings in perfect communion with one another. Honestly, barf. In our humble opinion, the juiciest "conscious relationships" make room for ALL of you and ALL of your partner. They are messy. They are real. They are human. In this episode, we talk about what *actually* makes a conscious relationship--at least the kind we're interested in having! Enjoy :)

Relationships are hard when both of you are stressed out and in "go" mode (aka, being do-do heads). Josef and I have both been do-do heads for some months now and it has definitely changed things in our relationship. In this episode, we talk about how to navigate a relationship between two do-do heads in a way that still fosters connection and that sweet, sweet lovin' we all want. Enjoy! :)

Recently our minds have been blown by the realization that tantrums can actually be SUPER productive in relationships. AND, not only that, they can actually give your relationships some juiciness that you can't get when you are, for instance, using non-violent communication. In this episode, Josef and I share what we've learned about having a productive tantrum in your relationship! Enjoy :)

I (Jordin) am going on an important journey. A journey back to my pussy. My radiance. My authentic feminine expression. This has come with a lot of fun times but also...there is so so much trauma to work through around this which has been challenging and emotional to navigate. But Josef has been with me every step of the way, reading all the books with me, listening to all the polarity lectures, and holding me while I cry and/or rage and/or totally panic. In this episode, we share about how this journey has impacted us both individually as well as our relationship. Enjoy! :)

Josef and I are both making some big moves in our lives which is great and all but also...stress. This is the first time in our relationship that both of us are really going for it at the same time and it has definitely required us to pay close attention to how stress is affecting our relationship. This episode is all about how we are navigating higher levels of stress in our relationship. Enjoy! - Josef + Jordin

"Trauma Horizon" is a term Josef came up with and together we are coining as a term to describe the trauma you are actively working through. But it's also so much more. And it plays out in relationships in so many ways. (Hint: Knowing not just your own but also your partner's trauma horizon is suuuuuuper helpful in staying connected through it.) Join Josef and I as we explore this cutting edge topic in this week's episode. Enjoy :)

"Change is inevitable" is a cliche but it is also super fucking true. And change = uncertainty And if there is one thing our parts hate the most, it is uncertainty. Because I mean fuck, it's UNCERTAIN. If one or both of us changes or our circumstances change -- for better or worse -- what's going to happen? Who will we become? Will we continue to evolve together or grow apart? Navigating change in relationships is a super important topic that we talk vulnerably about in this week's episode! Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

Jordin's got a lot of parts. Josef also has a lot of parts. This means there are sooooooo many different relationships within our relationship with one another. Different parts of us might like parts in the other or they might be terrified of them. And everything in between! In this episode, we talk about how these mini relationships within our relationship play out. Enjoy! - Josef + Jordin

Money and relationships, ya'll. Let's get into it.

What it looks like to climb the polyvagal ladder in healing relational trauma. First comes the grief... Then comes the RAAAAAAAGE. Jordin details a recent (massive) breakthrough she had with her parts and their relational trauma that has allowed her to admit something she's never been able to admit before. All this and more in this week's episode! Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

What happens when one partner is ready to be more vulnerable than the other? What happens when one partner wants to get closer in intimacy and the other partner thinks your level of intimacy is just fine? What if one partner wants to get some outside help and the other doesn't? This is a super common scenario in relationships + you don't have to be afraid of it! In this episode, we give our take on how to move forward when this happens. Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

Can we just not with the "dog house" and the "I'm in trouble" dynamic in relationships? It's such a common dynamic that we see all over sitcoms and the media. But it's a really unhelpful dynamic in relationships, especially relationships wanting to thrive. In this episode we talk about why the entire dynamic of "being in trouble" with your partner is so toxic & what to do instead :) Enjoy! - Jordin + Josef

Basically, Jordin micro-dosed and derped around in the woods for a while and learned a few things. She shares what she learned in this episode. We also talk about our relationship to psychedelics as well as the role they have played in our relationship. Fun stuff! Enjoy! - Jordin + Josef

It is super common to feel like you are "too much" for your partner. Especially when, historically, expressing your needs and emotions has led to criticism or withdrawal. I've heard so many people ask, "Is it okay to expect this need to be met in my relationship or am I asking too much of them?" This episode unpacks all that and more. Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

We all have masculine and feminine parts inside of us. (This isn't about gender, it's about energetic polarity.) There is something the masculine needs from the feminine to feel like he is thriving. And there is something the feminine needs from the masculine to feel like she's thriving. So we created two episodes that cover each topic :) This one is for the feminine! By the way - this can apply to relationships but it can also apply to your relationship with *yourself.* Enjoy! - Jordin + Josef

We all have masculine and feminine parts inside of us. (This isn't about gender, it's about energetic polarity.) There is something the masculine needs from the feminine to feel like he is thriving. And there is something the feminine needs from the masculine to feel like she's thriving. So we created two episodes that cover each topic :) This one is for the masculine! By the way - this can apply to relationships but it can also apply to your relationship with *yourself.* Enjoy! - Jordin + Josef

We all have masculine and feminine parts inside of us. This episode dives in on the masculine/feminine polarity, how it relates to surviving/thriving, and how to navigate our internal polarities as well as the polarity of a relationship. And of course, all wrapped up in a real-life vulnerable conversation in a real-life relationship. So much good stuff inside this episode! Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

We may or may not have been high while coming up with these 8 steps. Enjoy :) - Jordin + Josef

What happens when one partner is interested in healing and growing and the other partner doesn't feel that is a priority? When one partner wants to get coaching or therapy on their relationship and the other is actually against that idea? When one partner doesn't want the other partner talking about their relationship with their coach or therapist? This is a super common occurrence in relationships so we're digging into it on this week's episode! Enjoy :) Jordin + Josef

Our patriarchal society keeps women in a tunnel vision of physical appearance that blocks us from seeing our inherent power clearly. Here's how Jordin is breaking out of that and how Josef is showing up as the healthy masculine (hubba hubba). Also some notes on jealousy & the importance of hanging in the tension. Enjoy friends :) Jordin + Josef

Our last episode of 2021! In this episode we reflect on how much we've grown over the past year, reminisce on some of the highlights, and play a fun game in preparation for 2022. This is a game you can play for your 2022 as well! But it requires you to go ALL IN on your dreams. So play along if you dare :) Hope you enjoy this one! - Jordin + Josef