My Mom Always Says

We're wrapping up our first season with an ode to being a mom during the summer! We have a love/hate relationship with the sunny season; personally, it's our favorite, but as a parent, it can be an exhausting grind. We're talking about some of our favorite hacks to make summer fun for kids and parents (hot tip: don't over- or under-schedule yourselves), and how becoming a MOOK (that's a "mom of older kids") is ultimate summer goals. Finally, we're expressing our gratitude for all your support and kindness during our first season. We'll be back this fall with more mom wisdom from our hosts and some special guests! 

Today, we're talking about the unique, special, and sometimes sort of bizarre dynamics of siblings! We dive into the clarity raising multiple children gives you into your relationships with your own brothers and sisters, the frustrations of watching your kids torture their siblings, and the importance of giving your children individual attention in addition to family time. We love our siblings, and I'm hoping my kids will eventually remember that they love each other, too! In the meantime, let's talk about how to survive the drama, the competition, and the love/hate dichotomy that are all hallmarks of the sibling relationship. Listen now and share with your siblings. 

We teach our kids to say "please" and "thank you," but manners aren't exactly the most modern of concepts. Today, however, we're making the argument that teaching your kids the importance of good manners is actually entirely relevant in today's world — and those lessons will set them up to live a more confident, happier life. Modeling behavior is key, and don't worry. If your kids don't seem to be getting it now, they're probably still soaking it up (see Kate's path from battles with airline employees to chitchat with grocery workers). We're also telling some of our favorite dog manners stories, including one about a dachshund, a big box store, and the most refined woman we know, forgetting her manners completely. 

We couldn't wrap up our first season without talking about one of the biggest lessons my mom instilled in her kids: taking responsibility for our actions. We all make mistakes, she'd tell us; that's just part of being human. What sets you apart is admitting your mistakes, sincerely apologizing, and doing better in the future. Today we're talking about why that's such an important lesson to teach children and how it will serve them throughout their lives. We're also touching on how to talk to your kids about complicated issues (warm, racism, privilege) in honest, but understandable ways. This conversation — like those hard talks we've had with our kids  — can be awkward at times, but they're also super important. Listen now and share with us how you handle the toughest stuff with your children. 

In today's episode we're tackling the topic of self care. Sure, we all need to take care of ourselves, but "self care" as a modern phenomenon can be more anxiety inducing than stress reducing? Am I doing it right? Often enough? At all? The topic becomes especially fraught for moms, who are also told that we should always put our children's needs in front of our own, a recipe for some serious parenting burnout. So how do you navigate self care as a parent? We believe it starts with self awareness, and we're talking about how, through trial and error, you can figure out what actually serves your needs — and little ways to teach your family that those needs are indeed important, too. Self care shouldn't stress you out, but you shouldn't ignore it either. We'll help you find that balance to better serve your own physical and mental health on today's episode. Listen now and share with the people in your life who also deserve a break (i.e. everyone). 

In honor of both co-host Kate Stahl's birthday today and Mother's Day right around the corner, we're talking about our most-loved gifts for moms and grandmas and some of our all-time favorite products, perfect for gifting the moms in your life — or just buy them for yourself! From clean beauty brands that have transformed our admittedly aging skin and hair to the coziest robes, pajamas, and slippers around (believe us, we're experts!), here are the products both big and small that no mother should have to live without. We're discussing why we're so loyal to all today  — and giving some hints to our families on what we really want this Mother's Day. Listen now and visit our website www.mymomalwayssays.com for links to buy and a couple of awesome discount codes. 

We all want our children to eventually fly from the lovely nests we've created for them, but giving our children the independence they need to do so can sometimes be as hard on us as it is on them. We talk about the baby steps you can take to start teaching independence to kids of all ages (it can be as simple as a playdate!) and how fostering an independent mind is as important as giving them physical freedom. Then, we dive into the wonders of summer camp. We're big fans around here, and we'll tell you why we think every kid should experience it and how it changed the lives of two generations in our family.

The bonds between grandparents and their grandchildren are pretty darn special, but like any relationship, they take some serious work — not only between the oldest and youngest members of the family, but especially with the parents in between them. We outline the rules that every grandparent should follow. (Sneak peek: remember that mom and dad, not you, are in charge, embrace your changing family dynamics, lose the judgment about how your kids are doing things differently than you.) Listen and learn to get the most out of your grandparenting experience, because, as my mom says, "it's nothing but a joy, which is why they came up with that saying, 'If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I'd have had them first..'" Listen now and forward to the grandparents in your life.

Guys, this one is personal — and super complicated. Our hosts both consider themselves stay-at-home moms (though we prefer "lead parents") and women who value their careers. We both believe that women can "do it all" but also believe that trying to do it all at one time is often a losing proposition for everyone. We trust that every women can and should figure out what career/parenting dynamic works best for her and her family, and we believe that absolutely no decision she makes will be perfect or without struggles. Add in a global pandemic that forced millions of women out of the office and home with their kids, and ya, this topic is just a tad bit difficult to tackle. But we strongly believe that having the discussion is important — and that we should all be having these discussions in order to find a better system in our own lives and the greater country and world. So, no, we don't have all the answers on this one, but we think just starting the conversation is a step in the right direction. Join us — and if you have it figured out, please let the rest of us know!!

One of our hosts has a big celebration coming up this Summer: her 50th wedding anniversary! It's a huge milestone and achievement, but 50 years of marriage does not mean 50 years of absolute bliss. That old saying that "marriage is hard work" is definitely rooted in truth, and when you're in the hardest years of marriage — when growing kids and careers mean no one has time for themselves, let alone their spouse — it can feel, not just hard, but downright impossible to connect. But there is hope and so many reasons why putting in the effort to keep your marriage strong is so very worth it. We give our tips for staying married (a lot of it involves having realistic expectations!) and talk about how the things that made you fall in love with your partner can turn into the same things that drive you crazy about them ... and then make you fall in love with them all over again. Wild, mundane, frustrating, wonderful, join us in our conversation about how to make your marriage last a lifetime. 

On the list of things we hold closest to our hearts, female friendships are near the top. Our girlfriends keep us sane, understand the daily struggles of trying (and failing) to balance motherhood, work, marriage, and sanity, and let us express all our best and worst thoughts and feelings without judgment. In short, we couldn't survive without them. But that doesn't mean that finding close female friends and maintaining those friendships comes without struggle. Maybe you've just moved to a new town and are trying to find some real connections (we have some tips!). Or perhaps you're reevaluating a long-time friendship that has become more of a drain than a lift. Or maybe you're just having trouble reconnecting with old friends after two years of forced separation during Covid. Friendships can bring so much joy, levity, laughter, and support, and we're diving in to all of it. Listen now, and share this episode with the female friends who make your life so much richer.

You know that old saying "no one gets out of this life alive"? Of course it's true, but it's also true that none of us can avoid dealing with the death of loved ones while we are still very much living and breathing ... and grieving. In this episode, we tackle the hard realities of losing parents and watching grandparents suffer, and we discuss how important it is to help children understand and process death in big and small ways. But we are not people who believe that death marks the complete end of a relationship, and we might just have enough hard evidence to convince you, too. We share our favorite experiences with "the other side" and how those events can be such a comfort and a way to hold on to loved ones who are still very much alive in our hearts. Death and what comes after. It may sound dark and heavy, but don't worry, we focus on the light — and share quite a few laughs along the way. Because funny memories may be the best way of all to remember those we've lost ... and then maybe found again in unexpected ways. 

Everyone wants to be an optimist, right? And both our hosts self identify as exactly that, but what if your programming from childhood or just genetics in general means that you tend to think more doom and gloom than flowers and rainbows? Can you switch your wiring from pessimism to optimism? We talk about some tricks and tips on how to train your brain to think optimistically even if it doesn't come naturally and about the benefits of approaching life as an optimist. The last couple of years have been full of hardships and some real kicks in the gut, but it's also been lined with some beautiful moments and realizations. We don't believe in ignoring the hard situations in life (we're realists, too!), but focusing on the positive with a real sense of gratitude undoubtedly leads to greater happiness and a sense of peace. Plus, we talk about how helping your kids build self esteem can lead to a more optimistic outlook. 

For most of us, dealing with health issues is pretty simple. You (or your kids) get sick, you go to the doctor, he or she diagnoses the problem, maybe prescribes a drug to fix it or advises some rest, and a few days later, voila, you feel better. But what if that tried and true recipe for staying healthy and energetic stops working — and what if the doctors you hope will give you answers don't have them? Then what? Unfortunately, that's the situation a lot of women over 40 — when hormones start shifting, potentially causing our bodies to react in some crazy ways. Today we're talking about my recent and wild health journey, which included a lot of doctors who didn't really listen (and one who pretty much laughed me out of the exam room), how I learned to advocate for my own health and trust my gut (!!), and why every woman needs to learn to do the same. We all deserve to feel our best, and if you aren't, you have to listen to this episode.

Growing up, my mom always said that the first step in "deciding what you want to do with your life" (as if that's a one-stop situation) started with finding a passion. "If you're passionate about collecting garbage, you'll find a way to make money doing it," she said to me many times. I was not passionate about collecting garbage, but I was passionate about Seventeen and Sassy magazines, but as a teenage girl in Indiana, did that really qualify as one, unique, and two, as a legitimate career goal? Turns out, it did. Today, we get into how deciding what you really love is the best — and dare we say, only — way to find a profession that will not only bring you joy, but also pay the bills. It's not always the easiest or most immediate recipe for success but it is definitely the most sustainable one. 

As two women of certain ages (70 and 42, to be exact) with a shared propensity for both fancy skincare products and the desire to not let the wrinkles and gray hair get us down, we're getting honest about the good (spoiler alert: there's a lot!), bad, and inherently ugly parts of getting older in a world that seems to think women should stop aging at around 35. Where is the line between fighting against the realities of time and embracing their inevitable changes? Can we feel both gratitude for the wisdom that comes with age and resentment for the physical evolution that comes along with it? And just how often should I be getting Botox? (Kidding, but not really.) Aging gracefully is everyone's goal, right? But how to do it is pretty damn complicated. Join us as we talk about what works for us — and what definitely doesn't — and how getting older can truly be a gift. 

Thanks to the pandemic and the myriad changes, concessions, and serious concerns it's forced upon our lives, it's been a weird couple of years to be a human in general — and seemingly an even stranger time to be a kid. Or is that just an adult's perspective? How does one real kid (almost 11-year-old Mae Stahl) feel about how Covid has shaped and shifted her life over the last two years? We talk masks, remote learning, birthday parties (or lack thereof), and how she's acclimated to a world her parents never could have prepared her for while keeping her sense of humor — and developing some new, fun accents. Just how adaptable are kids? Listen to find out. 

Ahh ... the family vacation. In theory, it's a beautiful experience when both geographically distant and close-knit relatives can meet, enjoy each other's company, relax, and make lifelong memories. In reality, it can be a sh*tshow. Deciding where to travel and stay (large house/small condo/multiple hotel rooms), who's footing the bill, and who's in charge of feeding everyone (then washing their dishes) three times a day can make a family trip feel like a minefield, full of shallowly buried resentments and unhealthy family dynamics, just waiting to explode with one wrong step. Add babies and kids into the mix, and it just gets more complicated. But the family vacation CAN be fun for everyone (we promise!), if you just follow our tried-and-true recipe for success. 

As mothers, we tell our children that it's the inside that really counts, but as human beings, we know that their outsides are going to be judged over and over (and over) again. So how do we raise children that have high enough self esteem to rebound when the world tells them they aren't as perfect as their mothers have led them to believe? And how do we help them understand that their bodies and beauty aren't even close to the most important things, while preparing them for the reality that not everyone is going to agree with that sentiment? It's a tough one, but we tackle it with a super frank (and at times embarrassing!) discussion on this episode.

We all know newborns and babies are a lot of hard work, but guess what? So are toddlers, school-aged kids, tweens, teens, and college-aged young adults, meaning that once you're in this parenting thing, you're in it for life, with all the ups and downs included — and mostly completely out of your control. While we don't have all the answers on how to make the journey easy breezy (mom hacks aren't really our thing), we are here to commiserate, shed light on the many joys of this parenting adventure, and hopefully share a laugh or two, because what mom couldn't use a good laugh?! Join us on our exploration of the great parenting odyssey — from raising babies to enjoying your adult children as they raise their own. 

We're kicking it off with the inspiration behind our podcast: the wonderful, complicated, sometimes strange, sometimes transcendent relationships between mothers and daughters. We're as close as can be, but we know that's not always the case; in fact, we're probably outliers. So what is it about moms and daughters that gets so messy? And is there a way to heal, grow, or reframe your relationship with your own mother or daughter? Let's dive in!

We're so excited to bring our new podcast, My Mom Always Says, to you this month! You can expect lots of laughter, some tears, a few (okay, many) dog interruptions, and our pragmatic, empathetic takes on issues related to parenting, marriage, friendship, and work-life balance, all delivered with humor, compassion, and a real desire to make people's lives a little easier.