I Guess We Can't Have A Podcast

Men have it so hard so let's body shame them for an hour.Hear the full episode on our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/canthaveapodcast

And welcome back Josh Hartnett, who hasn't had any fillers.

Are we going to end up in an RFK camp?Subscribe on Patreon for the full episode: https://www.patreon.com/canthaveapodcast

And wtf is Elizabeth Hurley doing in a field with Billy Ray Cyrus?

But he's only emotionally available for trolling politicians.

And wtf was this C-list space team?

The internet is a mosh pit.

MGK is giving Florida baby daddy in this special episode. Why does the cheater get to bask in all the glory when Megan did all the work?

Eva gets ready for the U.N. while Ella drinks coffee and washes her face.

But first Hailey and Justin follow Selena and Benny to Disneyland.

Eva rhapsodizes America's best attribute while Ella yells at people who somehow opposable-thumbed their way to a cellphone.

Will Justin Bieber's pants lead to a national fabric shortage?

Also, why is there nacho cheese in the bathtub

We've all had way too much Blake - so let's give Kanye the attention he's so desperately begging for, which is to say that we're so bored with edgelords.

These celebrities are out of control. #hilariabaldwin #joeexotic #justinbieber #johnnydepp #amberheard #machinegunkelly

Poor Justin Baldoni. We're going to tackle this lawsuit one crazy allegation at a time.

As Lynch exits stage left, the ladies grapple with edgelords and people who just don't get it.

plus Cameron Hamilton from Love Is Blind liked our reel.

and John Mulaney's a big mess.

We were fooled by the smear campaign against Blake Lively, too.

Eva eats sourdough bread slices while Ella rips into Machine Gun Kelly.

Ella delights in Lou Pearlman, from The Dirty Pop Documentary, holding up a model airplane in the sky to leverage fake investments worth billions, catapulting the Backstreet Boys and NSYNC into superstardom. Eva's at work in New York while the shooter's running by with his backpack full of monopoly money. They agree social stratification is inevitable. Also #womeninmalefields nightlynoodlemonthly.com

The ladies have a comprehensive plan for life after the election and the sunset of democracy.

The ladies wonder how shady Kris Jenner really is, review Ali Wong's new stand-up special and Addison Rae's Diet Pepsi, and fangirl over their own podcast while Ella debuts her theory about how Michael Jackson might have influenced the untimely death of Elvis' grandson Benjamin Keough.

Ella spirals about her haircut while Eva recalls meeting the courtroom sketch artist for the P.Diddy trial in this special episode making fun of Dance Moms' Abby Lee Miller being unhinged at all times and Sean Penn's new granddaughter girlfriend.

Eva wonders whatever happened to JTT while Ella explains why she's on such a hot beat with the Menendez Brothers case, and the further we get into the state of things, you can see just why we don't have time for P. Diddy's freak-offs. Hailey Bieber's Dangerous Decade-Long Obsession youtube video

Ella and Eva spiral as their numbers climb into the hundreds of thousands of views on Tiktok.

The ladies try to figure out why the Olympics allowed Tom Cruise to fly around and try to get to the bottom of what the hell happened to the Jolie-Pitts on that plane. The fashion brand Casablanca changes Eva's life and she is not at all surprised at the breaking news of JLo and Ben's divorce. Once again, we laugh at everyone's fillers.

The ladies read & discuss New York Times article "How an Instagram-Perfect Life in the Hamptons Ended in Tragedy." https://www.nytimes.com/2024/08/08/nyregion/brandon-miller-suicide-debt.html

Despite Ella's COVID brain, the ladies do a deep dive into everything Hollywood, from JLo and Ben's impending split and Zac Efron's Ibiza incident to Bianca Censori and Kanye's marriage as performance art; and finally get to the bottom of Kim and Kourtney's Dolce & Gabbana drama.

A deep dive into the life and death of brat summer, making fun of people's reactions to the opening Olympics 2024 ceremony in Paris, and also what is the Light Phone II?

The ladies avenge Eminem's new album from the ridiculous review penned by Rolling Stone - interlacing memories of working at our college paper, the Brat album by Charli XCX and new biopic on Amy Winehouse. 

Drawing dead people, stuck in an elevator, celebrating the late Richard Simmons and remembering Shannen Doherty in her passing, the ladies cover a lot of ground while casting doubt that Trump's shooting was staged.

Tired as the night drags on, the ladies whine about Emily Blunt's fillers while wondering if Anna Wintour can just leave Vogue already.

The ladies do damage control by buying perfume, Natalie Portman rebounds with a date night, and Ella tries to sign a petition. Georgia's Garden: https://www.theylangylangtree.com/shop Aura St. Pete Perfumery Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aurastpeteperfumery/

Imagining life under a rigid authoritarian government structure in the U.S., the psychology of projected fashions that could follow suit, and what this has to do with Ryan Gosling's face. With secret guest.

Ella spirals about Ryan Gosling's tipping point with the face fillers, yells at her audience that they didn't listen to her advice about clear plastic flip flops, and Eva wonders out loud about her instagram aesthetic.

Ella spirals about mispronouncing Mila Kunis, Eva buys shoes.

The ladies wax nostalgic about the end of The Tefi Show, beg for it to come back, and get annoyed at annoying celebrities. The Tefi Show episode 82

Reading fan mail, Prince William attends Taylor Swift's Eras Tour, hot takes on best clothing for a post apocalypse summer. https://www.instagram.com/ellahours https://www.instagram.com/evaavenue

All you need to know about Ella's allegiance to The Row, rebranding apology videos, why we're burnt out on lecturing others, and the intricacies of Justin Timberlake's DWI arrest. https://www.instagram.com/ellahours https://www.instagram.com/evaavenue

Vegetables cosplaying as meat; are rodent men hot? Father's Day fail, New Wash shampoo, instagram, New York visitors, crazy person at the wedding, clothes as stories. Our new Instagrams https://www.instagram.com/ellahours/ https://www.instagram.com/evaavenue

In our first episode recorded remotely from NW Arkansas and NYC, we crack open nonalcoholic beers to discuss the roots of clean living, celebrity news on our Instagram feeds, early fashion influences and why we can't have a podcast. Our new Instagrams https://www.instagram.com/ellahours/ https://www.instagram.com/evaavenue