The Blackout Diaries

Comedian Joe Fernandez tells some stories, at our live show, from when he and his ex shared the same apartment after a breakup so he had to improvise whenever he had a one night stand, often leading to stupid lies or bad hotels (or both). Joe joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we talk about those nights and how difficult your social life becomes when your roommate situation is awkward or bad. This leads to a theme on bad roommates. CJ and Sean share some of their own stories, including the drug den CJ used to live in and how marriage did not make living together easier for Sean. We also share some stats on how people are keeping roommates longer post covid. Checkout Joe's comedy albums, DEMENTED and UGLY, online or if you are in Chicago stop by Will's Northwood on Sundays where he hosts the best open mike in the city.

The Blackout Diaries Podcast is back after a break spent on filming the TV Pilot. Unfortunately we received some tragic news that a dear friend of the show, Mike Polino, passed away from a rare auto-immune disorder. Mike owned The High Hat Club, which is where the Blackout Diaries performed for two years while The Lincoln Lodge was moving. He was a great dude and a hilarious presence behind the bar. We share some Mike stories -- including one he told at the live show about his attempt to fake an injury to avoid relationship trouble. Mike's bar The High Hat Club, was filled with characters and is sorely missed. This leads to a discussion on closed or dead bars- bars that closed up shop and that we miss. We share stats on how bar and restaurant closings are not nearly as common as people think along with some stories about our favorite closed bars.

CJ Sullivan and Sean Bair-Flannery talk spring break! We share some personal stories: Sean details how traveling with your kids on spring break can somehow land you in more troubling embarrassment than drunks and CJ shares a story about driving straight through the night to meet friends with no plans. We share some stats on how much money spring break generates for destination towns but, despite this, some towns despise spring breakers, including Miami Beach's "Breaking Up With Spring Break Campaign"

Comedian Hannah Belmont tells three, short, hilarious stories at our live show, ending with how she went on a date with her older manager at a Mexican restaurant while in college. Hannah joins CJ and Sean in the studio and they discuss her story in more details, everything from the COVID vaccine to Lalapalooza and bad bosses. CJ and Sean discuss the theme of 'bad managers' for the episode, detailing stories of some of their bad bosses- Sean's in IT and CJ's at a hilarious bar in Philly. We also share some stats related to bad managers, like how coworkers are dating more often, post-covid and the alarmingly high occurrences of sexual harassment in the food service industry.

An episode on The Super Bowl! CJ and Sean talk about their favorite moments watching America's funniest city, Philadelphia, win a Super Bowl and then party. People cooking pigs on trains, riding a top trains, maybe taking horses inside trains? We also talk about the city of Philadelphia's strategy for keeping cars and buildings safe and why anyone who says Kendrick Lamar's performance was a bad a halftime show is NO student of history- that Americans forget how hilariously mediocre the shows you used to be. We also share some mind-bendingly large Super Bowl stats, that the NFL shares with everyone and they are repeated as fact, but there's no way they are true, like how much money host cities make off the game and fans.

Comedian Jamie Shriner tells the story of her first road comedy gig where she drinks too much at the show, then goes to a strip where she is brought on stage. Jamie joins CJ and Sean in the studio to share some more details on the story (that was recorded at our live show) along with some of her tips with how to have a good experience at strip clubs. CJ and Sean then talk about strip clubs and their role in boozing. We discuss a Hollywood strip club where the dancers have unionized, a Detroit strip club mogul who built an offensive statue next to his ex wife's house and we bring up the recent Justin Tucker Rub & Tug controversy and how NFL stars can use technology to find masseuses who are willing to give them a handjob rather than assaulting people.

Comedian Chris Trani tells the story of when he was too drunk to enter Wrigley Field so, after security rejected him, he found a local Chicago softball game. Chris joins CJ and Sean in the studio to talk about the unique ways men plan a re-union weekend, versus women. We also discuss nicknames- the good and the bad. We share a study that suggests nicknames might be better to use if you have a very weird birth name and we tell some stories about some of drinking buddies who have great nicknames.

A Dry January Episode from The Blackout Diaries. Sean is doing Dry Jan with his wife and talks about how that began and CJ updates everyone on how he escaped the burning hills of Hollywood. The outgoing Surgeon General has announced that America should put cancer warnings on all bottles of alcohol and we discuss why that may not be effective and why getting people to quit drinking is much harder than quitting cigarettes- because alcohol is a lot more fun. We also share some articles about the warnings of Dry Jan and talk about how most of them do not apply to the kind of person that will consider taking 30 days off.

Comedian Kait Carmody tells a story at our live show about her recent trip to Ireland with her father, who was born there. Kait, who is also our newest coproducer at The Blackout Diaries, then joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we discuss everything from Ireland to how vacations are different with your family, versus your drinking buddies. This leads to a theme on family vacations. Sean tells some stories from his recent trip to Hawaii with his family and CJ shares some stories about his dead saving money on vacations by locating fly-by-night airlines.

An amazing standup comic and friend to many, Kenny De Forest, passed away a year ago this week. On this episode, we celebrate Kenny with a clip from his last appearance on our live show along with stories about Kenny from other comics. Comedian Aaron Weaver shares a great story about what it was like to hangout with Kenny and Matty Ryan talks about how much Kenny meant to everyone, as seen at the tribute show that was organized for Kenny. Cj and Sean add some of their own stories and impressions of Kenny, along with how standup comics tend to 'process' death (i.e. drink).

Comedian Kevin D Williams, a Chicago legend, stops by the studio as our first, post-election guest and shares his thoughts on the election. We play some live clips of Kevin and then talk Presidents. Kevin shares why he thinks Trump should have been banned from running for office, based on his experience at a McDonalds. And CJ and Sean share some of their favorite historical stories about hard drinking presidents.

Special Thanksgiving Episode! CJ and Sean share stories about the holiday we consider to be America's drunkest. We talk about how Netflix often screws up these kind of events with streaming problems, which forces us to confront the horror of interacting with our families. Why families get so drunk on Thanksgiving and how many mailboxes are lost due to driveway accidents. We share stats on which states have the most accidents and deaths due to deep frying turkeys and more.

Comedian Chelsea Hood shares the story of the time she backpacked across Europe with her boyfriend's sober, god-loving best friend- recorded at our live show. Chelsea then joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we talk about the special itineraries drunks have when they travel across a different continent. Chelsea also talks about what's its like to be a female construction worker and general contractor and how dudes react when she shows up to fix things. CJ and Sean share their own backpacking stories, along with some stories about how different EU airlines want to different policies on drunk passengers and a story about how European bullet trains confuse some people when they are on a bender.

A special episode celebrating the start of the World Series. CJ and Sean talk about the Dodgers vs Yankees matchup and how its causing Carmageddon in LA. We also talk about some of the funniest moments in World Series history, which include legendary drunk and slugger Babe Ruth ending game 7 on a hilariously bad stolen base attempt, George Steinbrenner claiming he was attacked by Dodgers fans- only to punch their teeth out. We also talk about drinking in the world series, including a Sox pitcher who entered the game drunk and how the Yankees may have punished Mantle and Ruth by making them play weird positions.

Comedian Tori Kilkenny tells two hilarious stories at our live show- one about the last time she blacked out and the other about an impromptu decision to tour her local fire fighting station. Tori then joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we talk about the joys of revisiting things you loved as a child , like fire engines and snow ball fights. This leads to a theme on firefighters- we share stats on how much firefighters drink compared to the average citizen and a story about a Wisconsin volunteer fire fighting crew that struggles to find a sober driver for the truck on weekends. We also share our own stories about dealing with Chicago fire fighters and what they will and will not respond to.

CJ and Sean talk about technology and drinking. Sean has recently been contacted by a bunch of people who have fallen victim to cyber scams and shares those stories, along with good advice on how to know if you are speaking to a scammer. We also talk about the Israeli operation that sold exploding pagers. CJ talks about the crazy tech theories he heard in North Carolina, between hurricanes. CJ and Sean end by discussing some recent ways science and technology has intersected with drinking, specifically the growth of sober influencers and how Ozempic is now being used to curtail drinking habits as well as eating habits.

The Blackout Diaries celebrates the start of college football! CJ and Sean talk about how college football tailgating parties are the some of the funnest, most-wild, yet somehow must-inclusive parties on earth. We share some stats on how allowing alcohol sales inside college stadiums has not lead to more binge drinking, along with some of our own stories about attending college games. And we close it out with a story by the hilarious Colby Dant of The Sports Gambling Podcast, on how he got banned from the Rose Bowl because cheering for the home team is illegal on the west coast.

Chicago bartender and musician Christian McGann explains the differences between the Front Of The House and The Blackout Of The House, to our live audience at The Blackout Diaries. Christian tells some stories about bartending in Chicago and concludes with a hilarious song about what it's like to hear the drink orders of customers all night long. Christian joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we discuss the demands of bartending, along with Christian's other tavern-based job- he is one half of a dueling piano duo. CJ and Sean discuss some stats about bartending and how much the service industry drinks, along with how some bars have adjusted to bad internet reviews in hilarious, albeit confrontational ways. Remember to subscribe to the podcast and leave a review- plus follow Christian to checkout more great piano tunes and live apperances.

Legendary Chicago comedian Joey Villagomez tells a couple of stories at the live show, about the time he got high at work during a polar vortex and then about the time in highschool when his buddy drank too much and had to be hosed down. Joey then joins CJ and Sean in the studio and shares some crazy stories about working for the city of Chicago, along with other drinking buddy tales. This leads to a theme on drinking buddies. We discuss the science of how drinking buddies impact our alcohol consumption, share some stories, and extend an open invite to a FL lawyer who got separated from his drinking buddies and entered the wrong car, naked.

Special episode where CJ and Sean talk about their favorite, world sporting event- The Olympics. We laugh about how an Australian professor might have danced so poorly her sport has been thrown out of any future Olympic consideration; how some swimmers are pounding Cokes to eat away at the polluted water; and the weird and often funny career opportunities that Olympic athletes have to jump on once the games are over.

Comedian Joe Kilgallon tells a story at our live show about the time he was the only man invited to a bachelorette party. Joe talks about being de facto security for the women, along with the funny differences between bachelor and bachelorette parties. Joe joins CJ and Sean in the studio and they talk more about how Joe is the perfect security layer for bar hopping friends. CJ and Sean also talk about how bachelorette parties are viewed as near locusts by some people, including a group of Boston researchers who say bachelorette parties are ruining gay bars and a town in Spain that is banning public displays of sex toys to try and discourage bachelorette party tourism. Give it a listen, give us a review and check out Joe's comedy specials on youtube along with podcast Let's Get Dumb!

Comedian Ed Towns tells the story of how a woman ghosted him, while they were both inside her apartment. Ed, who is also a producer of the The Blackout Diaries live show, joins CJ and Sean in the studio to discuss the story in more detail and share his thoughts on everything from ghosting, and bartending to how open mikes should be run. CJ and Sean talk about ghosting in more details and share some studies that prove ghosting is on the rise, particularly with younger people.

Comedian, and Blackout Diaries regular, Adam Burke tells the story of when he and a group of friends were robbed at gunpoint while drinking at a neighborhood bar. Adam shares all the details at the live show, which are equally funny and scary, then joins CJ and Sean in the studio to answer some questions on it. CJ and Sean then share some personal stories about drunk crimes they have witnessed and we share some statistics on how Americans are terrible at estimating how often crime happens.

It's All Star Week, so we dedicated a full episode to baseball drinking stories! Comedian, and former Blackout Diaries producer Derek Smith gives a hilarious recap of Cleveland's disastrous Ten Cent Beer Night, recorded at our live show in Chicago. CJ and Sean talk about how many people screw up the National Anthem at baseball games and we discuss recent surveys that claim Philly Fans drink the least of any baseball fanbase. We also talk about other famous baseball, drunken disasters like Disco Demolition along with some recent stories like the Reds fan who went viral after be tased in centerfield.

Comedian Michael Meyers tells the embarrassing story of the last and final time he drove drunk. Michael joins CJ and Sean in the studio to talk about how this incident, along with a wise tow truck driver, changed him. Michael also discusses his hilarious, debut comedy album, "Michael Meyers Performs Comedy for Real People", which is available on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRk3XSvSKnk . CJ and Sean then discuss how karma and drinking, including how studies have shown how 'good karma' or the goal of 'paying it forward' are actually bad qualities in the work force. Sean shares a reverse karma story about him giving an employer a second chance.

Special emergency podcast for July 4th, where CJ and Sean talk about America's unending love of drunkenly setting off fireworks. They tell stories of friends that nearly killed themselves lighting off fireworks while drunk and how a few of the videos of their buddies went viral. We also discuss the surprisingly high (or maybe low depending on your perspective) statistics on how many people injure themselves each year with fireworks and list some of the stranger, more dangerous injuries that have happened recently. Plus, fireworks aren't just dangerous for the consumer- we share stories on famous fire work factory accidents, ranging from the 17th century to modern times and how even police bomb squads don't seem to know how to safely deal with fireworks.

Comedian Kait Carmody tells a story about picking up a guy at a gas station while getting cigarettes at 4 AM. A guy who then has a hard time understanding that early morning gas station hookups might not be destined to last more than one night. Kait joins CJ and Sean in the studio and they talk about the details, along with how much Kait loves drinking in Chicago and in particular at the touristy spots. CJ and Sean then talk about the theme of cigarettes. CJ shares the hilariously-condescending line he was trained to say when he quit smoking. We also discuss studies on why people want to smoke more when drinking and what different countries and cities are doing to somehow make smoking even more illegal than it already is.

Comedian Matty Ryan tells the (hilarious) story of how he got stung by a jelly fish while taking a dip in the ocean in what was intended to be a quick frolic into the water while stuck in traffic. Matty then consults with an increasingly large number of people and experts to get advice on the pain, all of which just seem to laugh. Matty joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we talk about the story, and most importantly the urban legend that they only way to fix a jelly fish sting is to urinate on it. This leads to a theme on 'urban legends', in particular urban legends that drunks believe, like sucking on a penny to get out of DUI or eating the right foods to become sober.

Comedian, radio broadcaster and pro wrestling personality Kevin Kellam tells a story about the time his mom picked him up from a train stop while he was drunk and she started doing tricks in the car to tease him. Kevin then comes into the studio with CJ and Sean and they discuss this story plus some of Kevin's favorite wrestling stories. We discuss how parents always know you are drunk, wether they choose to confront you or not. CJ and Sean talk about failed attempts to hide drinking from their parents along with rushed cleanup jobs after parties. We also discuss Rick Flair's recent twitter spat with a FL pizza place along with the science of why your parents will probably always know you are drunk.

Comedian Lyssa Laird makes her (HILARIOUS) debut on the Blackout Diaries. She tells the story of dating a city boy in high school where her and her best friend from the south suburbs had a terrible night in the city after meeting him to drink an alley. Lyssa joins CJ and Sean from her kitchen while she preps food for her birthday party. We talk about Lyssa's past in the air force and what she learned about drinking in highschool. This leads to an overall theme on alleys, in particularly Chicago's sometimes love affair with partying in an alley. We end the show on a story from Chicago writer Raf Miastkowski -- a documented lover of alley drinking -- who tells the story about his roommate's fascination with alley amore.

Comedian Daniel Bergamini performs at our live show and tells about the time he and his girlfriend narrowly avoided a hospital trip after loosing a sex toy. Daniel then joins us in the studio to talk about the whole, Odyssean night, which began with a near trip to the hospital, then a night out that ended with a party where everyone was drugged. This leads to CJ and Sean sharing their own stories of drinking Odysseys. Sean shares a story about how a massive beer purchase lead to a three day lost trip and we share the science of why groups of drunks are more likely to get sloppy then loan drinkers, which can lead to more chaotic Odysseys.

Chicago is stuck in a polar vortex so CJ and Sean talk about drinking in cold weather. We share stories about football games in subarctic temperatures and how bars change their rules when it gets super cold, almost like they are welcoming weary travelers. We also talk about the science of why drunks don't feel cold but are actually more in danger of it than sober people.

Comedian Mary Kelly tells the story of when she went on a Corned Beef Sandwich Crawl for St Patrick's Day. Mary hits just about every Irish pub and sandwich shop in Milwaukee before finally have one-too-many shots of whiskey and it all comes out while the band is playing. Mary joins CJ and Sean in the studio and they share some more St Patrick's Day stories. We talk about how much Americans spend binge drinking on St Patrick's Day alone, why Chicago had to move it to a weekend holiday because of the chaos and how LA is so healthy- they ru a marathon on the day.

Legendary Chicago comedian Dwayne Kennedy tells the story about when he was so drunk at a club, he left to sleep on the hood of a parked car but still had the wherewithal to prepare his wallet and ID for when the police eventually woke him up (which they did). Dwayne also talks about why he quit drinking and then joins CJ and Sean in the studio to share more drinking stories and hilarious standup stories from his Emmy-winning career, like the time he promoted a nonexistent album on Jimmy Kimmel. Dwayne's story leads to other stories on the theme of falling sleep while drunk. We discuss why your body becomes so sleepy when drunk and also share stories about falling asleep on city streets along with famous cases of people sleeping in the wrong house drunk.

Adam Burke, one of our favorite comedians and drinking buddies, stops by to promote his amazing new album, "Weaponized Empathy". We share a clip from the new album then talk with Adam for almost the entire episode. Adam explains how he recorded the album, then moves on to hilarious drinking stories from his various ports of call, throughout his life- Western Australia, Northern Ireland, London, Chicago and (in one we still can't believe) Dallas. Adam's stories about drunk red necks that split time between the outback and beaches of AU always put us on the floor laughing. Checkout his new album- available everywhere online.

The podcast took a few weeks off because CJ was in the hospital due to a 'bum' lung, which he explains. This leads to a conversation about how often, even though CJ is sober, drunks end up in the hospital. Sean tells the story about the time he failed a stroke test and they institutionalized him. Then we share stories from the live show where a bartender ends up in the hospital due to an ill-planned attempt to hide a hickey and a bouncer nearly watches his friend die, then land in the hospital, when chugging a beer nearly ends in a drowning.

Chicago comedian Conor Cawley tells the story of a weekend trip to Mexico gone-wrong. Conor comes to from a blackout, trying to bribe a Mexican Federale while learning Conor has no money. Conor shares what happens next at the live show, then joins CJ and Sean to answer questions on this story plus Conor shares some holiday drinking stories. Conor's story leads to a theme of BRIBES on this episode, where we talk about the challenges -- and unique benefits -- of drunk bribing. Everything from the Olympics to Private bar parties is in play for bribing. The Blackout Diaries Podcast is now back to a weekly release schedule. Apologies for the missing weeks in Feb- we were recovering from some illness and, much as Santa needs people to believe in him for his magic to work, The Blackout Diaries loses some of its mojo during Dry January and Dry Feb. But we are back! And for those of you listening in Chicago- check out Conor's album recording this week at The Joinery.

LONG time friend of The Blackout Diaries, John Leadley, tells a story about the time he and his friends bought a bar off a guy in jail and how that bar was saved when gay people started drinking there. John Leadley is a comedian and bartender and one of the first ever performers at our life show. He joins CJ and Sean in the studio to talk about what it was like to own a bar in college, along what its like to own a bar now-a-days. CJ and Sean then talk about Chicago and LA gay bars , including the hilarious union demands that were made at one Chicago club.

Professional gambler and all around good-time Kevin Meeusen tells a few drinking stories at our live show about how the Internet has made gambling too well-documented and therefore too embarrassing. Kev calls in from his bunker in Vegas to talk gambling with CJ and Sean. We talk about how seemingly unethical all modern gambling commercials are, how alcohol effects gambling (both good and bad.. and, we hate to break it to you, its mostly bad) plus some famous court cases where drunks sued casinos for their losses.

Comedian Claire Sundbye performs at our live show, telling three of the most questionable decisions she made while drunk. They range from falling in love with a stripper to picking fights online with an internet troll. Claire joins CJ and Sean in the studio and we talk about how hard it is to interact online, sober or drunk, but particularly drunk. This leads to a topic about how dangerous the modern internet has become -- with everything from your bank to job connected -- when drunk. CJ and Sean talk about apps that are designed to prevent you from using the internet while drunk, along with some studies about how much money we waste online when drunk shopping and why modern AI can identify drunk people online very quickly.

Chicago legend Robert Hines, one of our favorite standups, tells a story about the time in high school when his New Year's Eve date with a woman who did not want fool around went south and ended with her attacking him. Robert's big-hearted brother drove his date home. Robert joins CJ and Sean in the studio to share more details on the story along with some other hilarious, family stories. We also talk about Robert's legendary youtube character, Jones Big Ass Storage and Good Ass BBQ. Robert details how he's been shafted on the royalties for those videos and is looking for legal help so he can re-claim his comedy creation. Please go to Robert's go fund me (link below) to help him in that battle if you have extra money. Finally, CJ and Sean discuss more NYE topics, including the science behind why we birds have even worse hangovers than us. Robert's go fund me: https://www.gofundme.com/f/Robert-L-Hines-legal-fund?member=26762561&sharetype=teams&utm_campaign=p_na+share-sheet&utm_medium=sms&utm_source=customer

Comedian (and reformed lawyer) Paul Farahvar tells the story about how his highschool experience all changed for the better, nay the flawless, after he received his old brother's drivers license and was able to buy beer at any liquor store. Paul details how they always went to the same liquor store and quickly became that owner's favorite customers but, unfortunately, the owner believed Paul was his old brother, i.e. in med school and capable of giving doctorly advice. Paul joins CJ and Sean in the studio to talk fake IDs and what it was like for Paul to start standup comedy while still being a practicing trial lawyer. This leads to a discussion on lawyers and, in particular shady DUI lawyers- a favorite industry for The Blackout Diaries. CJ and Sean share some stories about their own experiences with shady lawyers plus share some news stories about lawyers so shady they made world news.