Art of Play

Quality of life measures are an evaluation of how we are doing in life. Sometimes they are health-related, sometimes relationships related, but today I am going to challenge you to look back at your personal history and give yourself an evaluation of how your life is turning out, and I bet, it's better than you think.

This month as we talk about History, think back to the history that makes you, you! Think back to all the rules and learning that went into you becoming a better person and a person who is looking for more in the way of learning, loving and being better.

The theme for July is History. Your own history, how we are bold with our history, and how we see others' perspectives. It should be a great month! Thanks for tuning in.

Kim Christensen of Talk Wordy To Me is a business owner and writer who uses her creativity to her advantage everyday. As a co-owner of Promptly Journals Kim is used to not only creating but encouraging creativity and engagement from others as well.

This book is for Fred Roger's fans, but for everyone looking to add a little more wonder, hope and curiosity in your life (especially since that was Mr. Rogers specialty).  While this is geared toward parenting and raising the next generation, there are so many takeaways for the average adult to make their lives look and feel more enjoyable. My favorite chapters were: When You Wonder, You're LearningIt's You Who Have to Try It and It's You Who Have to Fall (Sometimes) Such a Good FeelingLink to the book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/When-You-Wonder-Youre-Learning/dp/0306874733/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2B528J7636X6C&dchild=1&keywords=when+you+wonder%2C+you%27re+learning&qid=1623962258&sprefix=When+you+wonder%2Caps%2C190&sr=8-1

Turning 35 this week was great, I enjoyed my birthday, but in the spirit of sharing some summer fun, I came up with a list of simple ways you can make your summer truly feel like a break, even if you have to continue to show up to a desk everyday. 

Fun is something we associate to everything from satisfaction to playfulness to leisure.  If I have this right, I think the majority of  people are not making enough fun in their life to find the satisfaction guarantee. This month we look at more ways to bring the fun back into your life.  

Do what sounds fun,Take breaks to refresh your mental state, Let your intuition pick the best things for your life, and Remember what you personally find intuitively fun.

Check out Kera on social media  @Kera_thompsonBecause she is amazing. 

While the information in this book is riveting and imagination-capturing, for the everyday person like me, where does it apply? Starting to pay attention to the ways I use my intuition, but also the ways that I learn about my intuition.  And how you and I both can be better at using it.  

Intuition is  a  term that has everything from a spiritual tinge to a blatant guidance role in our lives.  Most notably, intuition is noted, studied, and used as clinical terminology to describe an inner knowing that has real life effects, and researcher backing. If you need more intuition in your life be sure to take a listen. 

Literally the future is in good, kind hands. I caught a break to interview a bunch of generous kids about kindness, and they gave such great answers I had to plop them here for all to hear. The future is not only bright, but kind. Here's some quick takeaways: If you think someone is kind, tell them that is a quality you love in them. Think of when you might have needed some kindness from someone else, then pay it forward for someone new. Think of the net-good in the world, and add a sprinkle of kindness, and let it ride. Choose one small thing that you can change to bring more kindness to light in the world. Focus on that and make it a habit. Find your personal definition of kindness and let it guide  you for the better. Go out, play, and be kind. 

Here is my list of small kindnesses to add to the world when and wherever you can: Make people feel seenOffer help. Reach in a grocery store, put someone's cart awayPick up some trash, it's everywhere. Keep your eyes open.Smile at someone (I realize this one seems difficult because we are masked a lot in public and you cannot see people's mouths, but try while you are driving, or walking on the sidewalk, or at a public park)If you can/cannot smile at people, be sure to also try to make eye contact. Especially while conversing. Your checker, cart return, delivery driver, fast food clerk, gym desk attendee, older neighbor, everyone can see you seeing them, and in a time when human interaction is just plain weird, make sure to SEE people.Promote peace. at home, at work, at playListen to people. Be an active listener. Look it up, refresh your memory, and then practice listeningGive a genuine complimentMake small talk with people. It's trite sometimes, but try and make that connection kind and genuine.Help someone you love. Just a little or a little extra.Encourage someone. kindly offer feedback in an encouraging way.Let someone merge. For goodness sake try to be a generous driver.Pay for someone else. Even if it's leaving your change for the next personVolunteer your precious time.Say "I love you" to people. I mean it. Say it.Hold the door for someone.Offer to help. just offer.Withhold judgement. withhold speaking for someone else.Send a kind email, card, or text.Watch out for the lonely hearts of the world. People who look down and out, or are perpetually on their own. Make sure you recognize the people on their own who may need a lift.

In this episode we talk about three things: Her definition of kindness (which is good)Her history of learning to be kind (which is great) And the impact of kindness that my special needs younger sister Eliza Jane left for this world as an example. Listen in, and make the conscious choice to be a little kinder every single day. 

Adlerian Psychology is an intense and determined look at how we don't really need to take our past lives into account when forming our everyday life. While I have the benefit of taking this incrementally into my own life, I want to empower you to do the same. Some of the ideas and credits in this book are not meant to rule all, but add perspective. Boundaried kindness is what the world needs more of, and in fact, more self-compassion would help us all in bringing this about.  Link to the book: https://www.amazon.com/Courage-Be-Disliked-Phenomenon-Happiness/dp/1501197274/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3FWLPNMIM59I7&dchild=1&keywords=the+courage+to+be+disliked&qid=1617923903&sprefix=The+courage+to+be+dislike%2Caps%2C189&sr=8-1

Kindness is underrated, and underrepresented in our society, and yet it is one of the first things we experience and learn as human beings.  Today, let's change the way we think about how kindness contributes, and hope to bring a little more into our lives to make ourselves love to live a little lighter. 

The ways that we can emotionally heal are also the potential for growth. If we chase down a few small opportunities to heal, we also openly create pathways for exponentially more opportunities for growth and creativity in our lives.

About Autumn: https://www.mothermag.com/autumn-kimball-mother-of-6-boys/https://www.clarev.com/blogs/la-vie-cv/178201671-drawing-with-autumn-kimball-of-kimball-creative 

Links to the book: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Advantage-Positive-Brain-Success/dp/0307591557/ref=sr_1_1?crid=37MVNJUN79DE9&dchild=1&keywords=the+happiness+advantage&qid=1614968878&sprefix=the+happiness+%2Caps%2C380&sr=8-1

Here are some references from what I quoted today: Dr. Patricia Murugami TED Talk: https://www.ted.com/talks/patricia_murugami_four_steps_to_unlock_your_potentialMore story of my younger sister Eliza Jane: https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/deseretnews/obituary.aspx?n=eliza-jane-delamare&pid=190269171 

Today I have three of my own personal expectations that zap my creative energy and dissolve any resolve that I can create a new way of thinking. 

Find Jenna's podcast Dear Jenna Podcast (with Jenna Rammell). 

Where to Buy: Amazon: Thriftbooks.comSecondSale 

Expectations can be challenging to deal with, but did you know you already have the streamlined capability to make expectations part of your recipe for success? Come find out a little bit more about how to tweak your expectations to be a huge productivity boost!

Come listen to a few creative strategies about how YOU can face your fears (big and small) and come out on top! 

Citations for this episode: Babbie, E. R. (2016). The Basics of Social Research. Quote about authority and tradition. 

I asked the following questions, and you should answer them for yourself! What brings you joyDo you have a hard time with enjoyment? Tell me why in one word. If you could do something with one person, what would it be? What brings you confidence? What is your hope for the new year of 2021? Answer these questions and send me a voice memo: PODCAST@theoliverfund.org

Happy 2021!! Friends today is a quickie pep talk to kickoff your 2021! So excited to share some of the new research this year of making your life better with the little tweaks that make a simple life more enjoyable!

Less than 50 days are in the year and it is time that we come to terms that this might just be the best gift of 2020-- time to reset and have time to solidify relationships, rediscover our joys, and have a chance to make the transition to 2021 a great one. Here's to a good holiday season regardless of stay at home advisories and mask mandates! 

In this episode I recap the goodies I learned from the interviews of the relationship series. Most of the connections we make in life (that we want to keep) take work. For the majority of us, that means hoping things stay congenial, and within our comfort zone. If we want the relationships to grow, we have to be willing to push it forward, and this episode we talk about 4 easy and simple things to make sure we are getting what we need and want out of our relationships. 

Simple approachable ways to make your relationships better. Matt's book has focused on romantic relationships, but the focus on relationship building has the same applications to all relationships. Here  are the links to what we discussed in this episode. Matt’s Book: https://www.amazon.com/Love-50-Ways-Scientifically-Proven-Connect-ebook/dp/B0725NTQZW/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Matthew+Driggs+love&qid=1603999234&sr=8-1Active Listening IMAGO Dialogue information: https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/3 levels of conversation outline: https://authenticrelating.co/blog/2017/11/10/the-three-levels-of-conversation/(Informational: Most superficial; Personal: Invitation to connect, Talking about the emotion; Relational: Connecting and communicating about the emotion)

Kelly gives us all sorts of nuggets about sisterhood, or whatever "hood" you may need to surround yourself with.  Kelly gives us reminders about boundaries, building up old friendships, holding space for family relationships, bookmarking relationships, and fostering new space for growth! You can find more of her goodness on Instagram: @kellyejensen

Kristin is a master at showing up as herself, and she applies that to her marriage. Her ability to encourage, cheerlead, gather, and defend  are all a tribute to her working on many different aspects that bring her joy in life. Her love of gathering and feeding others has fostered a love of helping and lifting others. This has also shed a light on the relationship that Kristin shares with her husband Jeremy. They show the ability they have to support and care for each other in a tailor made way! Her tips and advice go a long way, and every relationship can benefit! Find more of her goodness: @kristinandrus on Instagram

Dr. Jennifer Finalyson-Fife is a sex therapist concerned with the thought that women (and men) can lose themselves in the expectations placed upon them in relationships rather than being true to their own innate desire to know themselves before they are known by someone else. While Dr. Finlayson-Fife is usually called up for a discourse on how to tap into your own desires to create an intimate relationship (generally with a partner), her wisdom and encouragement for women (and men) to figure out what makes them happy readily applies to the versions of ourselves that are "allowed" to do things, such as play. Dr. Finlayson-Fife has a wide variety of resources and educational guides on her website, including a vast library of podcast episodes she has done in the past, found here: https://www.finlayson-fife.com/podcasts 

Our guests in this series tell us all about their work, thoughts, and callings in bringing people together, even if it is just a partner or friends. We have a series of conversations about relationships, how they work, how unique they are, and how we can value ourselves in the process of making our relationships last. Stay tuned for some of the best in the relationship business! 

Here are the contributors @jennaevanswelch@jkirkrichards@tiffanyrosenhan @girlfromnowherebook@farmhousevernacular@missessies_est2003

Marcus is an owner of the small but mighty BBQ business, and Marcus created the  beauty behind the meats. I stumbled upon Miss Essie's BBQ sauce at our local Smith's here in Salt Lake and it is just the making of any great BBQ. Even if I can only make mediocre meat. Marcus has a true gift of tinkering and playing with flavors until they are just right, and his tinker abilities expand to also be a part of his business abilities. He is ready to tinker to get things right, and to expand his company!  You can find Mr. Marcus online at: https://missessiesbbq.com/And on Instagram: @missessies_est2003

I have the pleasure of introducing Paige Sander of the Instagram and Youtube Channel for Farmhouse Vernacular. She and her husband are double degreed engineers, and both grew up on farmland. When it came time to find a house they both wanted to settle on some land of their own in a house they could make their own. They found a 1905 farmhouse on 50 acres and it fit the bill with precision. They have taken the time and creativity to restore this home with an online audience and take us on entertaining diversions through remodeling bathrooms, and kitchens, and learning how to do things in the 21st century. Through all of these things Paige manages to keep a cheery entertainment about her, and it was on one of her soapbox’s about Play that I pounced on the opportunity to interview her and gain her perspective on why play is looked down on, but why it is ever more pressing than ever before.Instagram: @farmhousevernacularYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkx82bdlBc68Ty4EfDeCn1Q

Tiffany is a writer, who literally began writing as a hobby, and has grown her hobby into a novel!  Her book has been an Amazon Number one release for the summer and is making waves throughout the country! You can buy her book here: https://www.amazon.com/Girl-Nowhere-Tiffany-Rosenhan/dp/1547603038/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1KZVJAOO1JVGM&dchild=1&keywords=girl+from+nowhere+book&qid=1599160290&sprefix=Girl+from%2Caps%2C201&sr=8-1

His work has highlighted for many the approachable aspect of learning scriptural stories through a human lens of being in the story. His view of art and how it is a pass down of creativity and the value of the human being to create is contagious. Find Kirk on Instagram @jkirkrichards and @joel.church Here is his art school:  @jkrstudioacademyJKR Gallery handle:  @jkrgallery (check out their business card art show coming up!!  

Jenna Evans-Welch is a New York Times best-selling author. She has a myriad of talents, but her innate sense of direction in creative endeavors makes her a natural storyteller. Tune in and find out why this woman is a champion of creativity. Jenna’s Books: Love and Gelatohttps://www.amazon.com/Love-Gelato-Jenna-Evans-Welch/dp/1481432559/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Love+and+Gelato&qid=1597855399&sr=8-1 Love and Luckhttps://www.amazon.com/Love-Luck-Jenna-Evans-Welch/dp/1534401016/ref=sr_1_2?dchild=1&keywords=Love+and+Luck&qid=1597855430&sr=8-2 Love and Olives Released November 10https://www.amazon.com/Love-Olives-Jenna-Evans-Welch/dp/1534448837/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Love+and+Olives&qid=1597855495&sr=8-1 Jenna on Social Media: @jennaevanswelch on InstagramJenna’s summer book recommendations: The Mothers by Brit BennettBeach Read by Emily HenryHolding Up the Universe by Jennifer Niven28 Summers by Elin HilderbrandBig Summer by Jennifer Weiner

Many thanks to the sources below for the research, and guidance on this episode.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disappointmenthttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decision_analysishttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decision-making 

Personal Culture of Play , referencing Professor Cheryl Greer-Jarman Article: https://www.childcareexchange.com/library/5012552.pdf Great place to start defining personal cultural values: https://brenebrown.com/definitions/file:///Users/sarahelena/Downloads/List-of-Behaviors-for-Operationalizing-Org-Values-2020.pdffile:///Users/sarahelena/Downloads/Operationalizing-Your-Oganization-or-Teams-Values-2020.pdf

I think we all know that there is rebounding in living. We have to develop certain things from childhood on. We have to learn that life has disappointments, we can’t be invited to every party, friends move away or move schools, sometimes we are treated unfairly by someone we know well, or we have to be able to deal and cope with general disappointments in life.Here is a link to the book referenced in the podcast: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.ca/authors/54848/rick-newman

Here are the myriad of resources I listed in this episode:  https://www.un.org/en/observances/end-human-trafficking-dayhttps://www.charitynavigator.org/index.cfm?bay=content.view&cpid=5593#ratinghttps://www.ecpat.org/what-we-do/https://www.freedomspromise.org/https://www.safehorizon.org/get-informed/human-trafficking-statistics-facts/#description/https://www.dosomething.org/us/facts/11-facts-about-human-traffickinghttps://www.friendsofwpcnepal.org/2019/05/01/best-way-prevent-human-trafficking-nepal/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI9vqyjP316gIVDh6tBh0t3wKZEAAYAyAAEgJ-DvD_BwE https://www.google.com/alerts#

Our mistakes can be categorized into four different types. The faster we learn what type of mistake we are making, the earlier it is we can rectify our mistakes and become better! References for this podcast include the following:Mindset Article + Graphic: https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/42874/why-understanding-these-four-types-of-mistakes-can-help-us-learnNeil Gaiman Thoughts: https://www.dumbofeather.com/articles/the-value-of-making-mistakes/

I promised that I would put the following in the show notes so here you go: S specificM measurable A attainableR relevantT time boundThese are the known goal setting recipes for success. Take a listen and don't forget to share! 

The systems in our body are hardwired for efficiency and maintaining of the status quo. Sometimes in order to change the way our minds process or see things we have to envision some new way to challenge our bodies that does not require us to challenge them in fear. Here are some of the resources I used in todays episode: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-your-brain-is-wired-reveals-the-real-you/http://ecereport.ca/en/early-years-studies/early-years-study-3-2011/chapter-2-early-life-and-learning-behaviour-and-health/4-limbic-system-pathways/#:~:text=When%20cortisol%20levels%20are%20consistently,the%20limbic%20system%20are%20affected.&text=The%20fetus%20responds%20to%20the,slow%20to%20recover%20HPA%20pathway.

Just to put it in perspective the majority of the world now has access to a screen, and in this way we are seeing a decline in our ability to think and act with creativity. In this episode we talk about how sneaky little devices can siphon your creative juices and under the guise of relaxing or unwinding can sneak up and steal your time. Time that was meant to reset your brain and give you a reprieve. In this episode we take a look at how our play time has declined and screen time has increased. Society finds this acceptable, but at what cost? Jumpstart your creative thinking today with PLAY! Podcast referenced: https://www.nytimes.com/column/rabbit-hole

Remembering that fear is an excellent teacher is one way that we can look back as adults and see how we have shaped our perceptions of the world. Fear can be an excellent indicator of where we have emotional work to do, physical barriers to overcome and spiritual guides to be gained.  Not to mention that we have a politically charged world to tell us where to direct our fear.  This episode I hope puts all that in perspective. Fearing where we are going is not the answer. Finding why we fear, is how we know what we care about.  

Ashleigh is a long time adventurer, in fact she's the epitome of a life-time adventurer as she doesn't remember a time not being active and adventuring with her family. Learning along the way in the outdoors allows for a unique perspective on what kind of a person you have to show up when you're out in the great wide: YOURSELF. You can only be you, because any inconsistencies or incongruences can lead to unsafe situations and be detrimental for you. You have to be you, and as the outdoors shows us how to show up as ourselves we can also be taught to show up FOR ourselves. Take a listen from this stellar woman and get ready to play outside!