Journey to Grateful

In this episode of Journey to Grateful, I confront a question that's echoed in the back of my mind more than I care to admit: What more can I say about grief? It's not something others have asked — it's a doubt that creeps in on its own. Join me as I explore why this question lingers, how past comments can still influence the way I carry my grief, and why I believe continuing the conversation is one of the most healing choices we can make.

In this episode, I reflect on the approaching five-year mark since my loss—a milestone that still feels both distant and incredibly close. This time of year brings back the painful memories of those final weeks, filled with difficult truths and quiet goodbyes. I'm not sharing this to seek sympathy, but to shed light on the full arc of grief—the way it stretches far beyond the moment of loss. Through personal reflection, I hope to offer insight into why grief lingers, why it changes us, and why understanding it—whether you're grieving or supporting someone who is—is so important.

Before we experienced grief ourselves, many of us did our best to support others — but often in ways we now realize may have missed the mark. In this episode, I share an article that resonated deeply with me, exploring the regrets people have about how they once showed up for grieving friends and loved ones. As I reflect on a few of these powerful insights, we'll uncover how our own grief journeys can transform the way we support others with deeper empathy, compassion, and understanding.

Grief lessons often appear where we least expect them. In this episode of Journey to Grateful, I share an inspiring story that, at first glance, may not seem connected to grief at all. But look a little closer, and you'll see how it reflects the strength, hope, and perspective we discover along this path. This isn't just about grief — it's about how we live with it, grow through it, and carry it forward.

Grief is a challenge — one that reveals itself slowly, day by day, turn by turn. In this episode, I invite you to walk alongside me as I explore the many pieces of grief's puzzle, pieces we often don't even know exist until we find ourselves carrying them. Many of us once believed we understood what grief was, only to realize it holds far more weight, complexity, and unexpected lessons than we imagined.Today, I'll challenge myself to answer a simple, yet profound prompt: Grief, in a word, is… Through reflection and raw honesty, I hope to uncover truths about this journey we share — not the polished versions, but the real, sometimes less spoken-about moments of loss and healing. Join me as we discover together what grief truly is.

In this episode of Journey to Grateful, I explore a powerful quote about grief from an unexpected source—a well-known public figure who reminds us that loss is a universal experience. No matter our background, status, or profession, grief connects us in profound ways, yet remains deeply personal. This quote highlights both the shared emotions and the unique journey of grief, inviting us to shift our perspective and see it as more than just sorrow. Tune in to discover the surprising inspiration behind today's conversation.

Anxiety is something many of us have encountered—whether through personal experience or by supporting someone who struggles with it. But when anxiety intertwines with grief, it takes on a sharper, more intense form, often catching us off guard. For some, significant anxiety doesn't surface until they face a profound loss. In this episode, I'll explore an insightful article on anxiety in grief, shedding light on the ways it shapes our journey through loss—often without us even realizing it.

As I originally planned this episode, the calendar still read 2024—but life, in the best way, had other plans. An incredible opportunity led me to expand my career in a direction I've long been passionate about, and saying “yes” to it brought a renewed sense of purpose, much like when I launched this podcast in 2021. Now, on the other side of that decision, I feel grounded in a way I haven't for some time.But as we step into a new year, I want to revisit a profound part of grief that caught me off guard in my first year of loss—the constant struggle between “before” and “after.” It's not just a passing thought; it's a lens through which we unconsciously filter our memories, marking moments as either before or after our loved one was gone. In today's episode, we'll explore why this distinction becomes so significant and how awareness of it can help us navigate grief with grace and confidence.

In this episode, we're talking about something we all say but rarely do: cherishing every moment. It's a mantra we'd all agree is worth living by, but let's be honest—how often do we really pause and take in the moment we're in? Sure, we notice the big milestone moments, but what about the seemingly insignificant ones? Like a casual coffee date with friends, just enjoying their company in that easy, taken-for-granted way.Those are the moments we need to move to the top of our “to-do” list—to fully appreciate them as they're happening. Because after losing someone dear, your days can quickly fill with "what-ifs" and "should-haves" that linger far too long. So, let's explore how to truly cherish those everyday moments, big or small, and why it's such an important, albeit challenging, goal to pursue.

As I glance at the calendar, I realize it's that time of year again—though somehow, it seems to have arrived more quietly this time. With grief, it usually announces itself well in advance, looming heavily overhead and filling the air with a sense of oppressive anticipation. I've walked this path four times now, starting at the end of 2020. I wouldn't say it gets easier or harder, but it does become different.Does it still loom? Yes, in its own way. Is it as oppressive? Not like that first year. This is holiday grief, and sadly, it's something everyone will face at some point in their lives. There's no clear guidebook for navigating it, no perfect way to manage the milestones it brings.In this episode, I'll share my experiences and some suggestions others have shared with me about how to walk through moments like these. At the very least, I hope to offer some insight into what you might expect as you face your own holiday grief.

You might have seen the title of this episode and wondered how the idea of pivoting connects to grief. Today, we're exploring what it means to pivot—not just in life, work, or relationships, but specifically in how we navigate grief.Grief can sometimes make us complacent—too comfortable with the routines we've established to cope. We might find ourselves stagnant, unwilling to take steps forward to face our loss in healthier ways. That's when a pivot can make all the difference. Adjusting how we approach, manage, or confront our grief can help us move out of that rut and open up a new perspective—a path toward healing.

Have you ever just not felt like trying? Like trying to be "on" all the time or not wanting to go out and be around people? To be the person they expect you to be? That feeling might come after a hard day or a tough week for most people. But for those of you walking the difficult path of grief—whether it's a fresh journey or a long-worn road—I'm sure this hits close to home.Today, I want to talk about what it's like to keep "trying" while grieving and how it can feel like you're constantly falling short. I also want to share a few simple things you can do when you feel like you just can't anymore. The title gives away one of the most effective strategies, and I'll explain why it's so crucial for us to start thinking about it right now.

The way you see things can either fill your life with hope or leave you feeling hopeless—I really believe that. When we choose to dwell in our sorrow, pain, or anger, it's no surprise that the reflection we see in the mirror looks defeated, with no smile and no hope for the future. Now, I'm not saying we shouldn't feel those emotions—definitely feel them and let them wash over you. But don't let them define who you are or drain all the color from your life, leaving only gray. Let's take some time to dive deeper and explore how we can use the power of color to help lift ourselves up through grief.

In this episode, we're diving into a topic that evolves with time and experience: "Lessons Taught Through Grief." This idea varies for everyone and is shaped by each person's unique story, past experiences with loss, and where they are in life. I think it's essential for all of us to reflect on this occasionally, as it can be both therapeutic and eye-opening. It helps us understand where we are on our grief journey and how much we appreciate life, death, and our ability to move forward. Sharing these lessons with others can offer valuable guidance for their experience with grief, helping them understand what to expect and how to cope. So, join me as I share my story and the insights I've gathered from friends and family about what grief has taught them.

We've all heard the phrase "New Normal" more times than we can count, especially since the pandemic hit. When the whole country went into lockdown in March 2020, we were suddenly living in a world none of us had ever experienced. As things slowly reopened, "New Normal" became the go-to way to explain changes that had quickly become routine, even though they hadn't always been that way. But in truth, this concept of a "New Normal" has been part of many lives long before the pandemic, particularly for those grieving a loved one. For them, it's not just a trendy term or a casual social media post—it's a tough reality. As someone living through it, I can tell you it's far from easy. We can't just hit pause on it when it's inconvenient. So, if you're struggling with your own "New Normal," let's talk about how we can navigate it together.

In this episode, we'll explore Ten Common Myths of Grief. While these myths are a helpful reminder no matter how long ago your loss occurred, they're especially relevant for anyone in the early weeks or months of grief. However, even those who may be years into their loss may find it valuable to reflect on how far they've come and encourage the path they've established in navigating grief. It's important to remember that we're not as alone as we may feel in this journey, even if the loss was long ago. This episode will highlight myths to be aware of and offer ways to cope with grief or support others in their grief journey.

Sometimes, inspiration unfolds gradually over time, while other times it hits you instantly from the moment it arrives. Today's episode is the latter—it was sparked by, of all things, a Facebook post that popped up on my feed a few weeks ago. The post was a heartfelt "Happy Birthday" message to a lost loved one, written by a friend. The story itself is simple yet precious, but it's the message behind it—the title of this episode—that I really want to share with you today. It's a profound statement we should all consider embracing in our everyday lives, whether or not we're dealing with grief. But I'll admit, it will resonate even more deeply if you are. It's a powerful reminder to appreciate the important details in our lives that we often overlook so easily.

Throughout these episodes, I often mention that you never know where inspiration will come from when navigating grief. In this podcast, I've shown how to take a simple gesture or a joint event and translate it into inspiration or a lesson on grief, life, and, hopefully, living. But sometimes, you must actively seek inspiration, fresh viewpoints, or unique perspectives on how best to deal with grief. That's precisely what I've done for this episode. I've discovered a process I hadn't encountered before, and I believe its simplicity and common sense might be the inspiration you've been looking to add to your grief journey.

Perspective is an interesting part of the puzzle we try to piece together when we first lose a loved one and find ourselves alone at the table with grief. It becomes a living, breathing entity that changes as you navigate your grief. In the first days and weeks, perspective seems almost nonexistent. But as the weeks turn into months, it shifts, becoming a symbol of strength and an unexpected source of calm as you start to see details in your life that you once took for granted. Perspective becomes a friend, reminding you of the value of appreciation and gratitude. Join me as I revisit past episodes that explore perspective and the shift it brings after loss.

Self CareYou might think self-care is just a marketing buzzword that has nothing to do with you or your grief journey. But I'm here to explain that self-care is crucial for navigating grief and important to incorporate into your daily routine, just like exercise or nutrition.Talking about self-care in the context of grief can be uncomfortable for many. As humans, we often love deeply, and after losing those who brought us so much happiness, we might feel unworthy of being happy again. Yet, we are still here, stumbling through paths where "normal" used to be, aimlessly navigating grief without a road map or destination.Self-care plays a significant role in guiding us on our path with grief. It offers a healthier way to rebuild ourselves while walking with grief and everything that comes with it.

Understanding grief can only truly come through experience. In today's episode, I'd like to share Five Grief Lessons I've learned over the past four years. These lessons have helped me better understand and handle grief's unpredictable process. I'll share these five powerful lessons, which I revisit whenever I feel the emptiness of grief creeping in and overpowering my everyday life. When I feel alone in my journey with loss or face new losses—which has recently happened—these lessons help me navigate the new grief alongside the existing one. They are always by my side, reminding me how to approach those moments when I lack the confidence or strength to glide through them easily.Here are the Five Grief Lessons discussed in today's episode:Lesson 1 - How to Help Someone Grieving in the Initial WeeksLesson 2 - Time Does Not Diminish GriefLesson 3 - Grief is Like GlitterLesson 4 - Wash the Orange Cup … When the Time is RightLesson 5 - Grief is a Coral Reef

Let's talk about memories. Cinnamon Sugar Memories, to be exact. You may not know what that means, but I believe it's safe to say we all have them. The phrase came about through a story I read, reminding me that the simplest things often hold the best memories. Sometimes, many memories are stored within a tiny, insignificant thing, like a blanket, a toy, a childhood location, or even a cinnamon sugar shaker. Join me as I discuss what I'm calling Cinnamon Sugar Memories, why they are so powerful, and how we should all cherish them every day and find ways to create new ones today.

Some episodes are easier than others, and this is one of the more difficult ones, as its creation is rooted in a milestone that has prompted an examination of time. Additionally, it has brought to light an internal struggle I wasn't fully aware of. Facing a different future isn't a sudden revelation I had today; instead, it's a reality I have finally decided to examine earnestly, to face honestly, and to fully understand what it means to me today and beyond. Today, I invite you into my stream of thought as I dissect the passing of time during my grief journey and what it means to face the future alone.

In all honesty, death has a cruel way of revealing what is truly important in life, often pressing us to take action or change course with the little things we've postponed "until later." So, when you're with family and discussing getting together again for an official family photo, take the photo now. Mark the moment today and capture those smiles and laughter while you're together. Above all else, understand the value of a photo, but more importantly, the stories accompanying it.

An odd thing happens when you lose someone very close to you, who is part of your life every day from morning to night. Whether labeled as a spouse or partner, it's someone whose absence is deeply felt. After their death, you begin to feel that many others don't understand what grief truly is. This might be because they have been fortunate enough not to have experienced it, or perhaps they haven't known this loss. When you stand with grief day after day, you wonder if anyone understands it as you do. I've been fortunate to discover a piece of writing that, in my view, completes the phrase "Grief is..." in an enlightening manner. Join me as I share what I believe grief is.

I've been considering the subject matter for this episode over the past few months, and honestly, I've been hesitant to dive into it. I can't explain, even to myself, why I've kept pushing it off, but somehow, now feels like the right time. Sometimes, the episode topics I examine feel like chores—something you aren't looking forward to and need to be in the right mood and proper mindset to tackle. I suppose that's where I was with this subject, and now I find myself in the right frame of mind to explore it. I suspect this will be an important topic to examine for the benefit of many others, as I know I am not alone in my struggles with redefining what once was "we" and is now simply "me."

Over the past four years as a widower, I have often been asked how I have managed to navigate my grief so well. I honestly don't believe I navigate grief better than most at all. From my perspective, it remains a ball of chaos, both externally and internally, and I feel it will always be that way to some extent. There are three things I believe I do well. First, I focus on living as my wife, Colleen, encouraged me. Second, I try to identify the details of my life for which I should and can be grateful. Third, I set SMART goals for my grief. Specifically, an organized method to set and achieve a goal through a realistic, step-by-step thought process. Let's discuss how setting SMART goals in grief can be a catalyst for walking more successfully with grief while attempting to find a way forward.

As time progresses, we experience moments where we find ourselves being the first. You might be the first to turn 16 and pass your driver's test or a few years out of college; you might be the first among your friends to become engaged or married. These life's firsts can reveal both positives and negatives. For instance, being the first to buy a house can be thrilling, but getting a coveted driver's license often means becoming the designated driver for your entire friend group. On the other hand, being the last can have its ups and downs. The last to get a driver's license might receive very little fanfare since everyone else has already experienced it.Similarly, what can be said about being the first to experience significant loss or the last in your friend group to do so? Are there positives or negatives involved in these particular firsts and lasts of life? Let's take a moment to delve deeper into this topic and consider any experiences you might have had that highlight the benefits or drawbacks of being first or last in significant life events.

Throughout the journey of this podcast, I've often remarked on the diverse sources from which episode inspiration emerges. Since its launch on April 4, 2021, I have been astounded by the avenues through which inspiration finds me. It might spring from social media, conversations with loved ones, or even the intricate lyrics of a song. Whenever these sparks of inspiration occur, it's as if a dim light in my world suddenly brightens, signaling a message worth sharing. For today's episode, I find myself drawn to a poem that resonates deeply, echoing a theme that has been heard in this podcast since its inception: the enduring nature of grief. This poem is a poignant reminder that grief is a journey without a clear endpoint. Understanding this reality can offer solace and insight, fostering compassion and empathy as we traverse this path with resilience and understanding.

In today's discussion, I want to revisit an earlier episode, Episode #45, titled "What's in Your Cup?" In that episode, I explored the idea that as we journey through our daily lives, we carry within us a multitude of emotions and experiences. Some of what's inside us is fragile or delicate, while others are joyful or satisfying. However, there are moments when the contents of our internal cup spill out, often triggered by life's unexpected challenges. This phenomenon often leads to the typical expression heard in grief: "I don't know why I'm crying." I believe it's important to revisit this timeless concept, especially as we approach spring and upcoming holidays like Mother's Day and Father's Day, which can amplify feelings of grief. Whether you're hearing this analogy for the first time or could use a reminder, join me as we explore "What's in Your Cup" once more and discuss strategies for navigating difficult days ahead and beyond.

Recently, I felt compelled to express my thoughts in a manner different from my usual approach, aiming not just to articulate but to depict a profound understanding of why grief endures indefinitely. Even years after losing someone deeply cherished, the notion of "moving on" remains elusive for many. Within my bereavement group, we delve into strategies for navigating grief and what that truly entails in real-life terms. Each person shares unique perspectives and encounters, revealing the individualized nature of grief's journey, which extends far beyond simply progressing forward. Its manifestations vary, its progression unfolds diversely, and its timeline defies uniformity. This episode is dedicated to the intricate nature of grief and its constant presence. I encourage you to find comfort and openness, allowing the words to envelop you as we explore the complexities of grief together, perhaps even inviting you to confront that blank page yourself.

Your thoughts wield significant influence, shaping your experiences and impacting your well-being. The quality of your internal dialogue holds substantial power, often evolving into beliefs that shape your outlook and actions. This influence can be constructive, driving self-motivation, or detrimental, fostering self-doubt. Just as the nutrients we consume affect our physical health, our thoughts profoundly affect our mental well-being. They can either bolster our resilience and positivity or lead us down paths of negativity and weakness. The reassuring truth is that we can steer the course of our thoughts, influencing our happiness and mental health, even amidst the challenges of grief. Let's take a moment to examine our inner thoughts closely and explore strategies to cultivate beneficial ones for our future well-being.

It's widely acknowledged that navigating grief is an intricate and challenging process for most individuals. Yet, amidst this recognition, the extent and intricacy of secondary loss often remain underappreciated. Secondary loss refers to the additional losses that accompany the passing of a loved one. These losses manifest in various ways, such as abandoning plans that were once shared with the deceased, which can no longer be realized in their absence. This notion of secondary loss illustrates just one facet of its complexity, serving as a reminder that grief encompasses a multitude of losses beyond the initial departure of a loved one.

Anticipatory grief refers to the distress that individuals may feel leading up to the death of a loved one or another impending loss, whether days, months, or even years in advance. The experience of knowing change is coming can start the grieving process in anticipation of that loss.Many people have encountered anticipatory grief without recognizing its name or concept. Reflecting on personal experiences and discussions with others, it has become evident that this form of grief is more common than initially perceived. Bringing attention to anticipatory grief aims to shed light on it for those unfamiliar, reframing knowledge as understanding, which empowers individuals navigating grief. Understanding anticipatory grief can ease the journey through bereavement and offer valuable insights into the grieving process as a whole.

Since its inception, the Journey to Grateful podcast has been driven by my mission to offer diverse perspectives on the grieving process, utilizing storytelling, inspiration, insights, and personal experiences. Periodically, I receive comments or emails from listeners in response to a specific episode or a recurring theme spanning multiple episodes. Today's episode is directly inspired by such feedback from several listeners.A common thread emerges from their messages, detailing their ongoing efforts to navigate various aspects of moving forward and coping with grief in their daily lives. They generously share their triumphs and concerns, hoping that their experiences might offer solace or guidance to others facing similar challenges.The reality of taking steps toward progress and learning to live with grief often diverges from preconceived notions. In this episode, I invite you to join me as I relay, in their own words, the journeys of these individuals as they strive to move forward amidst grief as I interject my own.

The people we surround ourselves with in life hold significant importance. They not only have the power to positively influence our growth and development but also serve as a crucial support system during times of need. For those who have endured the loss of a loved one, the value of friends and family during periods of tragedy and grief is profound.Family manifests in various forms throughout our lives, and amidst grief, it often extends to support groups comprised of individuals we may have never crossed paths with until the moment external support becomes indispensable. In today's episode, I engage in a conversation with a friend and colleague about the significance of these support groups, sharing our personal experiences and expressing gratitude for the newfound family we've discovered within them.• • •Learn more about Magic Mind, an all-natural mental performance shot known to boost energy and focus, crush procrastination, and help elevate mental clarity. Head to magicmind.com/grateful and use promo code GRATEFUL20 to save 56% off a 30-pak subscription. That code will also allow you to benefit from a one-time purchase savings of 20% if you'd like to try it out before you commit.

Living Beyond Grief encapsulates the idea that life continues despite the profound challenges posed by loss, and it compels us to navigate this journey in some meaningful way. The persistent question of "how?" often fuels nights filled with anxiety and days marked by aimless wandering while the world around us maintains its usual rhythm. It feels as if we are learning to walk again, navigating a path that can be both bewildering and daunting.In a previous episode, I discussed five strategies for reconnecting with life. In conclusion, I shared a powerful notion: "The idea of living forward can truly empower you to strive for and create a life you might have thought was done, and, in turn, it will allow you to do something equally incredible… and that is living beyond grief."Today, I want to explore the meaning behind that concluding phrase and reflect on my actions over nearly four years to successfully "live beyond grief." Strangely enough, the measure of my success remains uncertain, at least in my perception. I question whether I will ever truly feel successful in this endeavor, yet one certainty prevails—I will persist in my efforts.Join me in this discussion as I explore the concept of Living Beyond Grief, sharing my perspective on what is necessary to achieve it and how we can collectively support one another in pursuing this challenging yet worthwhile goal.

In today's episode, "5 Empowering Strategies to Help You Reconnect with Life in Grief," our focus will be on providing actionable concepts to assist you in taking steps forward through the grieving process. Having personally experienced the challenges of moving forward, I understand this journey's daunting and complicated nature. However, I firmly believe that by approaching it with honesty and armed with effective strategies, we can navigate the path toward rebuilding our lives after loss.It's essential to acknowledge the task's difficulty, but with a proactive mindset and the right tools, we can more successfully embark on the journey of moving forward. Now, let's dive into our discussion and explore these empowering strategies that aim to guide us toward reconnecting with life amidst grief.

Just like a book is more than its pages, encompassing the breadth of words, the complexity of details, and the depth of emotions that shape the narrative, so too is your life after losing someone who played a pivotal role in shaping your story. It comprises every moment they walked by your side, every gentle touch, every wonderful laugh, every shared teardrop, and every memory you now hold dear. Even in the solitude of today, when you may feel down, sad, or lost, you extend far beyond a single challenging moment because of the entirety of your story. You transcend a small slice of your past or the recent week, whether good or bad, triumphant or insignificant, not confined to the tears recently shed or the difficult moments survived. You are the sum of your story, not limited to one isolated moment.In this episode, the suggestion is made that, even amid grief, each individual possesses the power to influence the unfolding story ahead. The approach chosen for each day holds sway over the story being written. In any given moment in a day, you may experience grief and sorrow, but simultaneously, you embody life, joy, love, strength, inspiration, purpose, gratefulness, and so much more.

I believe it's essential for all of us to intentionally slow down, pause, and observe our surroundings more frequently than we currently allow ourselves. This is not solely because life has a tendency to swiftly slip away, a realization we're all too familiar with, but also because within the constant hustle of our daily lives, there exist numerous unique perspectives from others that offer crucial and valuable lessons. Embracing a fresh outlook on various facets of life can serve as a reminder of beliefs we might have either lost or entirely forgotten over time. When grief becomes a part of our daily existence, it becomes even more imperative to take notice of these deficits and reacquaint ourselves with life's essentials. In my search for such a perspective, I stumbled upon an article that has the potential to offer each of us a much-needed, refreshing viewpoint. Though the subject matter is intricate, at its core, the message is simple—coming from the most unexpected source: children. That, precisely, is why I've chosen to share this today. Navigating and surviving grief often leads us to overlook simple things that could aid in our survival. Our perspective on life can easily be obscured by the weight of grief, causing us to forget the importance of one fundamental element: love. In the midst of grief, we may misplace our appreciation for any remaining love, thereby becoming blind to the lessons learned, the moments witnessed, and the experiences accumulated over time. Today, I want to delve into the theme of love and our forgotten capacity for it as we navigate through grief and move toward whatever lies ahead. Let's embark on this journey together and rediscover an essential piece of our path.

The individuals with whom you choose to surround yourself hold significant importance throughout your entire life, and this influence becomes even more pronounced during times of grief. I count myself exceptionally fortunate to have received incredible support from my family and a diverse group of friends who have offered unwavering assistance in numerous ways. Among these friends are those who simply provide feedback on the episodes of this podcast. As a podcast listener, you may not be aware that responses and feedback on our work are surprisingly limited. When my friend Amanda, the creator and host of the travel podcast "Me & the Magic," shared her thoughts on Episode 116 - "It's OK Not to Be OK," she not only affirmed the episode but also introduced a second viewpoint, which became the foundation for this episode, "The Guilt of Grief." Amanda reflected on how the episode made her ponder the flip side of grief, suggesting that moments of being okay during grief could be accompanied by feelings of guilt. There is no doubt that her insight deserves further discussion and clarification, especially for those of us who struggle to grant ourselves grace when experiencing the guilt of grief.

Join me for a distinctive perspective on how we, as grievers and mourners, can navigate those instances in our grief journey when it feels like we're losing our footing. As we seek a fresh, stable direction for our lives moving forward, it becomes apparent that we might need to initiate discussions about the topics we often avoid. The things we don't talk about.I urge you to accompany me as I express my thoughts, realizations, and experiences on this matter and encourage you to contribute your own insights to the ongoing conversation.

I'll confess, I believe the topic of this episode may be long overdue. While I've touched upon this idea in previous episodes, I sense it's time for it to stand on its own. The reason is simple: I believe an increasing number of people may not fully grasp this straightforward fact—it's okay to not be okay.As human beings navigating the journey of grief, there are moments when we simply have to acknowledge and embrace the reality that we're not okay. Feeling emotions and allowing ourselves to experience the depth of our feelings is an integral part of our humanity.This episode aims to delve into the notion that, as humans, we often hold onto the belief that we must always project strength. However, I contend that this belief might be doing us a disservice to our collective ability to progress through the grieving process.

Today, I pose a question to you: Does grief possess inherent value? I venture to guess that none of the listeners to this episode have ever contemplated this inquiry, nor have you pondered the potential value of grief in your life as you mourn that special someone who still occupies a significant part of your heart. This notion extends to self-value as well. Consider this: What is YOUR value?While we often reflect on our purpose and our contribution to life as a whole, the question of our intrinsic value may not have received due consideration. The direction I'm heading with this thought stems from a fascinating concept that sheds an intriguing light on how we perceive value.Taking it a step further, I propose that similarly, we can regard grief as possessing a value in our lives—its significance contingent upon what we choose to do with our grief. So, what will you do with yours?

Approximately two months ago, I came across the phrase, "Die with memories, not dreams." Revisiting it today, I still perceive it as a profound and meaningful mantra to embrace in life. This perspective prompts me to ponder the question for all of us: "How many dreams do you currently hold that have yet to transform into memories?" In addition, which of these dreams are within your capacity to pursue? More importantly, I believe a crucial question remains for myself, personally: Will I actively pursue them? Will you?

Have you ever found yourself in the company of friends in a laid-back, public environment, only to unexpectedly trip and tumble to the ground? In that moment, as you gather yourself and try to maintain your composure, there's a touch of embarrassment that creeps in. You attempt to find humor in the situation before your friends do.I acknowledge that this might seem like an unusual analogy, but I'd like to propose that there's a facet of navigating life with grief that mirrors this experience. Join me as I explore the connection a common trip and tumble has with the daily struggles with grief.

In this episode, although it centers on the unique perspective of an individual who has experienced the loss of a child, its overarching message seamlessly extends to encompass any form of loss and grief. The discussion today delves into the insights of someone navigating the intricate path of grief, offering a profound understanding of their thought processes while interacting with others during this journey. Their candid words provide a truthful and straightforward examination of the mindset associated with grief, shedding light not only on the immediate weeks or months post-loss but, somewhat surprisingly, even extending to years beyond. Throughout the dialogue, I will integrate personal observations and experiences into each of the "Ten Things to Know About Grief," with the goal of fostering a more accurate comprehension of grief. Whether you find yourself supporting someone on their grief journey or personally navigating this path with uncertainty about what lies ahead, the aim is to enhance understanding and provide insight into the unpredictable nature of the grieving process.

Throughout numerous episodes of the Journey to Grateful podcast, I have consistently emphasized the overarching notion of the significance of simply being present for someone grappling with grief. It doesn't necessitate extravagant or intricate actions to provide assistance; the key is to just show up.I'm confident that many individuals, like myself, have aspired to offer meaningful support to someone navigating loss, only to struggle with a sense of inadequacy regarding what we can genuinely do to help. I often find myself pondering the deceptively simple question, "What can I do to help?" Over the years, my conclusion has become clear: "Showing up" is the most impactful gesture.Whether it involves sitting by their side, providing a listening ear, or serving as a sounding board for their emotions, there is immense power and value in the act of showing up. It begins with the subtle yet profound gesture of being the person your friend can authentically open up to when they feel ready to do so.The sense of loneliness following a loss isn't solely a result of the absence of a loved one; it is exacerbated by friends and family who may choose to maintain distance due to the belief that they can't offer any assistance or simply because they are unwilling to confront the uncomfortable realities of grief.Allow me to share a story that might enhance our comprehension of The Power of Showing Up and underscore the importance of the smallest, considerate gestures.

Amidst the depths of sorrow, there arises a crucial need for us to be gently nudged toward vital facets of our lives that often get brushed aside. Some of these elements are overt, while others manifest in subtler ways; however, the reminder is equally imperative. It's a call to acknowledge the elements in our lives that still warrant gratitude, even amid grief.We must be prompted to recognize that there remains a reservoir of gratitude within us. Moreover, we need to be aware of the importance of self-care, extending not only to ourselves but also to those in our circle who share in the grieving process for the same loss. We must be confident in our strength, surpassing our self-perceived limits and assuring ourselves that a path forward can be found.In pursuit of this purpose, I wish to offer you a written piece that adopts a distinctive tone narrated through the perspective of our departed loved one.

The episode's title hints at yet another analogy aimed at describing grief, attempting to articulate what the experience feels like. If you're a regular listener, you're likely aware of my belief in the power of analogies to provide a more accurate understanding of what grief truly is and how it profoundly affects those in mourning. The very reason behind the creation of the Journey to Grateful podcast is to demystify grief and make it a more accessible topic.The forthcoming analogy I'm about to share is remarkably apt, offering the clearest depiction of the intricate and all-encompassing nature of the grief experience.

Consider this thought-provoking question: Are you letting grief be a part of your life and your daily experience as someone who is grieving? Maybe the better question is whether you've ever thought about intentionally "Letting grief in."This notion isn't necessarily groundbreaking; counselors and therapists likely share similar advice. However, I've grown to value this concept more deeply as I've navigated my own journey. Now, I've stumbled upon words that might help you appreciate the benefits of actively embracing grief into your life. Join me as I discuss this challenging mindset and how it can help you.