Marriage For Millennials: The Podcast

Marriage is a beautiful picture of Christ and his bride the church. With that picture in mind, it's healthy and wise to want to make our marriages the best they can be, where both parties serve, love and honor each other well. But what are the dangers of taking instruction from social media and how should we approach marriage in real time, when the camera isn't on and there is no audience but God? All this and more, on a new episode of the podcast.

It's easy to be positive when things are well, positive. It's harder to show kindness, joy and long suffering when you're directly experiencing adversity. How do we not grow weary in doing good? When God has us placed in a hard season and hasn't called the season to end just yet, how do we endure in the meantime? All this and more in a new podcast.

We are called to be in the world, but not of it. But in a world that constantly pulls on the strings of our emotions, desires and vices, what does this look like practically? How do we remain physically present in the world, but not consumed by it? All this and more, in a new episode of the podcast.

Forgiveness is for you and not them. Is it? Maybe. On one hand it is, as forgiveness is something that we do because we submit to God and understand that he forgives us daily so we forgive so that we don't hold on to things. But is there another step to take? Why do we stop there? As we represent Christ, his grace and mercy…forgiveness actually is for the other person too. Today we're talking about forgiveness, reconciliation and the pride that prevents us from doing both. A new episode starts now.

After taking a step back to put God first, Rochelle returns — refreshed and with a renewed sense of purpose. In this video, Rochelle shares what the break taught her, how her faith deepened, and what's next for the podcast. Thank you for sticking with us on this journey! IG: @rochellesoyoola

Anna Deavere Smith once said: "Friendship is a wildly underrated medication." It's medication can fix the most broken of them all, and refusing it can make wounds heal much slower. Ultimately this is God's sweet gift to us on what an earthly depiction of Christ on earth is, so we need to choose our friendships wisely. How do we go about choosing our friends? All this and more, a new episode of the podcast starts now.

With our community and culture being exposed to new artists, speakers and preachers, it's cool to be a Christian again. With new converts being added to the kingdom and seasoned saints rededicating their lives, how do we build endurance as it pertains to our faith? What does it look like to choose interdependence over individualism? What is discipleship and what does it look like? Rochelle talks about this and more in today's episode.

Conflict is natural and apologies are necessary. But they aren't the end and they aren't accountability. Listen as Sam and Ro discuss.

Boundaries are the current buzzword that most millennials are welcoming into their lives. But with all medicines, there are side effects. Sam and Ro discuss boundaries, and the loss and loneliness that come with it.

We're proud of the new wave of conversations concerning family. But with all things, there is always opportunity to grow. Check out our new podcast, where Ro and Sam talk the problem with relationship podcasts.

Rochelle and Sam are back, with a new name and new updates to the family. What happened to you guys? The answer here:

We are talking about moving in harmony while dating and married. A lot of women are on the quest to find someone but what really needs to be discussed is the maintenance of your dating candidates and healthy ways to maintain a relationship once you've reached marriage. So that's what we're going to talk about today.

How To Date Strategically And Avoid A Poor Dating Investment by Rochelle Ham

So today’s podcast is about Acknowledgement Over Self-Internalization. You guys know that I am heavy on the gram and I find that a lot of the comments I get both positive and negative have a root of internalization. You have some people that have internalized their dating history and see my content and are like “omg, I love your content, please help me” and they are just extremely disappointed with themselves to the point of not feeling worthy of dating and therefore being stagnant while dating. On the flip side, you have the women that are also internalizing and feel regret for their dating experiences, so they response in a negative way to me as a way to deflect from the shame they feel in themselves. Let me tell both types of women. Stop. Stop internalizing and start powerfully acknowledging. So that’s what we’re going to talk about today.

So relationship baggage. We all have some version of it, from our childhood upbringing, to our friendships and to today’s topic specifically, our previous relationships. Relationship baggage is something that can really weigh us down if we let it, and we want to pack light! We don’t want to have to pay any oversized luggage fees in our lives. So today I’m sharing 5 Ways For You To Unpack Relationship Baggage.

Our take on privilege, causing others to stumble and unfortunately, covetousness.

As women, we want many things when in comes to relationships. But I think that if we stripped away all of the materialistic things and focused on what truly matters, most of the things we truly need would fall under the umbrella of security. Above all, as women we want to feel secure when we are dating, and we want that feeling to last in our marriage. But when we say we want to feel secure, what does that actually mean? How can we tangibly break this down so that we know what to look for in a dating partner, or what to pray for or even thank God for in our husbands?

Today’s podcast is listener requested. She asks: “Hey Rochelle, I just got out of a relationship that was supposed to end in marriage. What do I do now?"

Ro talks about purity culture and the blind spots in these teachings. How the way we deliver these teachings have indirect effects that can prevent us from walking with the Lord, in a more well rounded way.

Ro answers a listeners request on when to address conflict in relationships and how.

Sam and Ro are TWO years old! Married that is. In this podcast, Sam and Ro talk about their marriage and reflect on the hills and valleys of doing life together.

Today's podcast talks about the common misuse of a 50/50 marriage, why it won't work, and what type of marriage will.

Transformation Takes TIME by Rochelle Ham

In light of the latest national news of police brutality and riots, Sam and Ro talk about how to prepare spiritually, physically (protection), financially, politically and to the community we are called to...should the world take a turn for the worst.

This podcast is listener requested, and Sam and Ro are talking about being married and how that new dynamic impacts your friendships with your single friends.

Sam and Ro discuss The Four Vital C's of Marriage: Consideration, Confession, Commitment and Change.

Sam and Ro talk about their differences in marriage, and how compatibility can be a myth.

Sam and Ro talk about the three marriage mindsets important to the newly married millennial.

Ro & Sam talk COVID-19 and share a new perspective on why some newlyweds experience disappointment once married.

A new season of MFM Podcasts begins now. Kicking things off with our new podcast called “Analysis Paralysis: Pushing Through The Desire For Perfection”. Sam and Ro talk about something they know all too well...analysis paralysis. The podcast duo drops some MFM disclaimers and talk about how to make hard decisions and how not to beat yourself up about your process while staying focused. Topics Include: The Culture of Execution: The Quest To Be "Booked & Busy" The Highlight Reel of Social Media We're Not Apostles We're Not A Perfect Couple -anniversaries don't make you more qualified We're Not Perfect Individuals -God uses common men How To Make A Decision & Not Beat Yourself Up About It

For their first podcast of 2020, Sam and Ro talk about the "Jesus Is Your Boyfriend" culture and how to confidently want singleness to be a short term season.

Rochelle continues the Beyond Titus 2 & Proverbs 31 podcast series with a topic about gossip and how as wives it leads to idleness. In this podcast, Rochelle shares about how she has gossiped in the past and talks about gossip at work, church, with friends and even gossip with your spouse.

Sam and Ro talk about how millennials can leave and cleave to God’s truth over their spouses’ emotions. Topics Addressed: Pressures of Unison In Marriage Leaving & Cleaving To Truth Your Spouse May Not Always Like This Examples of Leaving & Cleaving To Truth When You Leave & Cleave Incorrectly, You Don’t Model Christ’s Idea For Marriage Wives, Don’t Be Manipulative Husband’s, Don’t Be Manipulative How Leaving and Cleaving With Truth Strengthens your Faith In God

Rochelle begins a mini series of podcasts that talk about Biblical Womanhood outside of Titus 2 and Proverbs 31. She shares stories in the Bible that help us also see the great women in the Bible and who we are supposed to be as servants to God first, and wives and mothers second.

NEW PODCAST & IT’S A PODCAST COLLABORATION! This week we teamed up with Rachel and Austin from Because Marriage Matters to bring you this week’s podcast titled, “Who's To Blame?” From the moment Rachel and Austin’s publicist reached out to us, collaborating on this project has been very insightful and very intentional for our listeners. The four of us worked together with our listeners in mind and came up with a podcast itinerary that we know you will not only just love to hear, but one that would provide a different perspective to navigating through your marriage. Meet our guests this week Rachel and Austin. They have been married for 8 years, and they are certified marriage coaches based out of Kansas City, Missouri. Together they are the founders of Because Marriage Matters, where they counsel married couples and create strategies for them to transform their marriage. They work with couples through their online programs, in-person events, 1 on 1, and 2 on 2 coaching and counseling. In addition to this, they have three beautiful girls, and serve in worship at Summit Park Church. Today we’re talking about blame in relationships, specifically marriage. We touch on: 1. Projection From Childhood 2. How Society Supports Our People Blaming Nature 3. The True Reason We Project 4. How The Desire Of Even Good Things (Wanting to be protected, respected, not wanting to be anxious and requirements due to parental upbringings) Can Lead Us To Project 5. Spotting The Projection 6. Thrive For Life Marriage Weekend We hope that you will enjoy this!!! Special thanks to Rachel and Austin and Because Marriage Matters for podcasting with us.

1. Friends -meeting new married couples -friendships with older couples -”You can’t be close to me if you don’t accept my whole family, which includes my wife.” -Sam -the joy of reconnections with old friends 2. Family -the value of family -dealing with in laws -setting boundaries 3. Tough Times In Our Marriage -Lord I love you and am trying to trust you, but I just don’t think I can do this. -Millennials and the false narrative they display about their marriages -Taking a break from the podcast? 4. You Don’t Think You Want To Rule Over Your Husband, But You Do -the way you react to things says a lot about your trust in your spouse and your trust in God 5. Does Your Wife Understand Your Leadership? -wives want to go on adventures with their husband, but they have to know where they are going 6. Dependency on Counsel. Counseling Won’t Change Your Heart -some things you need to figure out on your own 7. Operating With Optimism In Your Marriage 8. Anniversary Trip? Kids? …and more. Told you it was a long one. Enjoy!

Sam and Ro talk about the possibility of cordiality with friends that you disagree with. Topics Include: 1. Yes 2. No 3. Be Careful of Getting The Job of God Wrong -10 years from now -stop thinking it is you that is the convincer of the mind - do you only want the win? 4. Agreeing With Other Couples: Marriage Politics -agreeing with other husbands (wife perspective) -our bromance has to has to come to a halt because of your wife (husband perspective) -Being mindful of what your spouse is trying to build with another spouse 5. Private Love, But Public Hate -some of the people you hate publicly because of their views are the ones that will be the first to help you in your time of need 6. Debating Etiquette with Another’s Spouse 7. In the event you feel there is no way to coexist with this person -how to be comfortable with a decrease in contact or being the cordial friend that only pops by for special occasions

Sam and Ro record their convo yesterday in the kitchen. This is a nonstructural, raw, unedited, more passionate look into what they talk about when no one is listening. A variety of topics are discussed, and no topic is off limits.

Sam and Ro discuss flock fear from a member perspective. Topics Include: Create The Itch, Don’t Scratch It Scripture vs Your Feelings: “I Feel it in my spirit” Giving -because you’re a good steward vs you got a "good word/performance" Selective Church Membership? Bivocational Pastoring Accurate Fear of the Flock Encouraging Your Pastor

Sam and Ro discuss uprooting your upbringing. Topics Include: Who Says Parents Can't Be Critiqued? Parents Are Key -honor your parents -parents lay the foundation Upbringing Peers -peers influence you more -being able to let chapters close with friendship traditions Upbringing Matters In Relationships -upbringing shapes your expectations Singles -weeding out upbringings while dating Other things upbringing affect -politeness over genuineness -being so organized that spontaneity is sacrifice -so much focus on logic that emotional connection is lost Uprooting upbringing -imperfect parents and peers mean transferred imperfections so what do you do about it Truth Over Tradition: don’t choose culture over Christ -don’t choose culture over Christ Being Mindful Of Your Impact On The Next Generations Upbringing

Sam and Ro discuss contentment vs ambition. Topics Include: Contentment vs. Happiness Contentment Is More About Your Heart Than Your Circumstance Contentment Is Not Void Of Ambition -Christians feel like being content means being broke (let's discuss) Ambition Vs. God's Sovereignty Contentment In The Home

Sam and Ro discuss infidelity. Topics Include: Fornication vs. Adultery Playing House Work Spouses Adult Entertainment Secret Texting Intimacy With Your Spouse

Sam and Ro discuss being fruitful over busy in Christian social influencer culture.

Sam and Ro discuss The Dangers of Idolizing The Five Love Languages. Topics include: What are the five love languages? How We Felt About Them Initially/Change of Heart That We Want To express with you Its Easy To Love Those That Love You (Matthew 5:46) That Sounds Like A Personal Problem Idolize Me Culture Sanctification Timeline: God’s or Yours? Compatibility

Sam and Ro do their first podcast of the year titled “God Vs. Your Vision Board” to kick off 2019. Topics include: Let Your Yes Be Your Yes & Your No Be Your No It’s Cut Off Season! (Insert Sarcasm Here) Law of Attraction vs. God’s Sovereignty The True Art To Moving In Silence Changing Anytime

Sam and Ro expand on secular song "Thank U, Next" by Ariana Grande Topics Include: If You Knew Who You Spouse Would Be From The Beginning of Time, Would You Change Your Past Relationships or Experiences? Lessons From Our Exes? -who deserves the thanks? -when God gives us over to our unwise desires -should partners be used as education Casual Dating -do millennials truly enjoy it? -how enjoyable is casual intimacy? How Do Christian Courtships Differ From Casual/Serial Dating? -dating is for how, courtship is for who Intentional Questions To Prevent The Dating Grey Area

Sam and Ro discuss the process of choosing a new church. Topics include: Setting The Foundation of Your Marriage With God The Church Search: What Should You Know About The Church You Want To Join? -making sure it is a good fit for you, teaching, discipling, leadership -is it wrong to ask for your church's financial reports? The Church Hurt -getting past church hurt (previous and present) -why do we look at church/Christians as a no hurt zone? Community -what does church community look like for you? -overcoming anxiety with joining a new church

Sam and Ro continue their leaving and cleaving podcast by discussing how new marriage priorities impact friendships and social groups. Topics Include: Is It Necessary For Your Friends To Get Along With Your Spouse? What If You Spouse Doesn't Care For Your Friends? -do you have to end a friendship just because your spouse doesn't like them? We Can't Kick It The Way We Used To -opposite sex friendships What To Do When You Are At Conflict With Your Friend's Spouse...Or Your Spouse's Friend -some things just won't work if Christ isn't in the center -you won't understand Christ's guidelines for conflict Using "Choosing Your Spouse In Conflict" As An Excuse Not To Reconcile -faux forgiveness -why dissolving a friendship is the easy way out and not necessarily the Godly way out -why apologies are cowardly -what is true reconciliation -is reconciliation a requirement

Sam and Ro discuss what leaving and cleaving looks like, as well as the feelings that come with starting your own family. Topics Include: Symbolism of Marriage for Husband & Wife Imposter Syndrome -are you qualified for this new role? Anger -going another way than your parents Sadness -missing your parents Happiness -the joys of starting a family

Sam and Ro discuss money, as it is the foundation of many things and can be a sensitive point in marriage if not controlled. They also answer the question they have recently been asked the most: how did you pay off your home? Topics Include: Money is one of the top leading things for divorce? Joint Account Experience To Split or Not To Split (Bills) Paying Off Our Home Reasons Why You Are Having Trouble With Money Being A Steward Over God’s Blessings

Check out our new podcast titled: "Physical Expectations In Marriage? Why Don’t Pastor’s Talk About Gluttony?” Some key points: God Gives Us Food As A Gift/Pleasure Why The Church Doesn’t Talk About Gluttony? Body Shaming vs. Accountability Exercise Is An Excuse? Using Being A Church Leader or A “Good Mom or Dad” As An Excuse? Grace In Physical Expectations