Wine You Wish Upon A Star

This is the tale of a very special individual, someone from a small provincial town of simpletons who stands out for their incredible drive, ambition, and literacy. Someone who finds love in the most unexpected of outcasts and will brave any obstacle to secure their love. We're talking, of course… about Gaston. Be our guest as we proudly present Beauty and the Beast (1991). Try all the gray stuff such as: - A Boomspoon. Spoom. - Seriously, read between the lines, Gaston is a secret nerd and genius. - He's also at extreme risk of heart disease due to his preposterous egg diet. - If your dishware gives you tasting recommendations, don't eat that. Gross. - THE CHILD THAT DOOMED HIS STAFF TO ETERNAL TORMENT. - Belle's uncharacteristic shows of massive upper arm strength. - Go watch Disney Movies and shows in other language tracks. Try it out! Featured Wine: Kiamie Rosé and Kiamie Unlocked Send us a Like on Facebook for further updates and discussion: https://www.facebook.com/WineYouWish/

I'm gonna level with you on this one… For the first time we attempted to record back-to-back episodes and with the combination of staying up way too late and imbibing two movies' worth of spirits, this one got a little goofy. Honestly, it's going to sound super edited because, well, half of it was unusable. But through the magic of post production, we are now presenting an undeservingly scathing review of a mostly forgettable movie. Think of it as free association podcast jazz, I guess. Anyway, here's The Rescuers Down Under (1990). - Bernard and Bianca (not Rachel, not Bernice, not Valerie) are back at it again, supervising children as they rescue themselves. - Crime MacGruff the Poacher steals the boy. - Cody! No more adventures until you call your mom! - Joanna eats up movie time by eating eggs. - Nun mice have strapped down Wilbur for some very plot-heavy butt jokes. - Something something multiplane something something. - Yes, we can't wait for Beauty and the Beast either. Featured Wine: Adelaida Pinot Noir

You know, life can sometimes resemble a torrential waterspout. And with fast automobiles, single file photons, and aviation machines, it can create an effect known colloquially as “Duck-blur”. Solve a mystery (or rewrite history) with us as we endure Duck Tales the Movie: Treasure of the Lost Lamp (1990). Let’s unearth Collie Baba’s tomb to find: - Our favorite outdoor recreation - tracking and hunting railroad trains. - The epic family tree of Disney Ducks. - Holy moley, this movie moves along fast. - Oh Dijon… more treasures in your baggy parachute pants? - Don’t worry, marbles and scout handbooks solve everything. - A family friendly story featuring a villain responsible for obliterating entire civilizations. - And we have discovered the absolute strongest character in the entire pantheon of Disney heroes... Featured Wine: Decoy Pinot Noir from Duckhorn Send us a Like on Facebook for further updates and discussion: https://www.facebook.com/WineYouWish/

Look at this Podcast. Isn’t it neat? Wouldn’t you think we’ve had too much to drink? Ladies and gentlemen both above and below the water’s surface, we have finally ventured into the Disney Animation Renaissance with the induction of this classic tale of true love and teen angst… The Little Mermaid (1989) Dive in with us and hear our disembodied voices as we explore: - Being rescued by True Love’s… Swipsing? Kissming? - Fi$h Ke$ha returns! - The new shark-centric podcast: Gill You Scream Across the Screen - Ariel’s collection of human parts for the black market - Crazy mermaid upper body strength - Flounder is a secret troublemaker and a Jenga master - Brenna has an unhealthy attachment to Jodi Benson - Scuttle, the true master of sea and sky, commands all creatures Featured Wine: Hampton Water Rosé and White Girl Rosé Send us a Like on Facebook for further updates and discussion: https://www.facebook.com/WineYouWish/

Start spreading the news… we’re in that city that never sleeps to give Charles Dickens that modern 80s animal twist (pun intended) for 1988’s Oliver and Company. Drape on your finest sausage scarf and join our discussion of: - The day-ruining prospect of a horde of helium dogs slowly falling from the sky - Crime pyramid schemes that rely solely on animal labor - Endangered children whose names end in “-enny” - Georgette sparks the return of the Blue/Gold dress debate - Brenna’s home security precautions if pizza is not ordered - The violent villain death at the hands of Thomas the Tank Engine Featured Wine: Islands Mai Tais

The game is afoot! An inexplicably human-shaped foot on a 3-inch rodent. How do we know? Elementary, my dear Watso… I mean Dawson. For our next venture we're hot on the trail alongside… The Great Mouse Detective. Join along as we wield the power of deduction to discover: - Mouse Fieri’s Diners, Drive-Ins and Holes - The unforgivable act of sugar bowl double dipping - The Bye Felicia Bell - The villain’s massive corollary is gulped away - Questionable octopus anatomy - And our exclusive one-time game show: Guess The Renamed Classic Featured Wine: San Antonio Chianti

In the beginning there was King Shmamadon of Primpletot and he was beset upon by a great evil from the Dark Lord Mlarlarlar who sought an enchanted Bimpygrog… Okay, so we’re not so great with hard fantasy names. But yet, here we are with The Black Cauldron (1985). Put on your +15 Wizard Robes and roll that icosahedron, while we DM your journey through: - Navigating the Labyrinthine Maze of Poor Pronunciation - Escaping the Dungeon with the help of Princess Aioli’s Ringtone - Solving the Tottering Tower of Ovarian Jenga - Braving the Suffocating Pit of Witch Cleavage - Facing an Army of Blurry Baloney Skeletons - Defeating the Final Boss: Smauchy the Kissing Sloth Featured Wine: Adelaida Pinot Noir Send us a Like on Facebook for further updates and discussion: https://www.facebook.com/WineYouWish/

It’s that classic love story. Boy meets Dog. Girl meets Fox. Dog meets Fox. Boy chases Fox with a shotgun. Fox almost kills Dog’s friend. Girl abandons Fox. Dog hunts Fox. Fox fights Bear. Wait… that doesn’t sound right. But so it goes with The Fox and the Hound (1981). Sniff out the trail with us as we discover: - A matronly drag queen narrates the ordeal. - A skin kite to Neverland! - The multitude of birds and servants in 12 Days of Christmas. - The Jeff Goldblum Virus conspiracy. - FI$H KE$HA!!!! - Land Monstrose swipes left on Timber. - Don Bluth jumped the Disney ship at the right time. Featured Wine: Wild

Send out a bottle message to the Rescue Aid Society, because it’s time to call on the world’s tiniest investigators of... child trafficking. Yes, it’s time for the first adventure of The Rescuers (1977). Jump aboard the nearest albatross and strap yourself into a sardine can as we explore: - Some fine international accents representing mice of the world, and some even FINER vocal sound effects work. - Miss Medusa Hannigan DeVille. - The cat-like acrobatic feats of... Hamilton? - Flamba Farts Mom wears a pair of Crocs. - Calling for emergency weight loss surgery via firework spectacular. - The most depressing, self-deprecating orphan girl ever accompanied by equally sad music. - Appearances from special guest stars: Dracula, Brenna’s Belly, and Hulk Hogan. Featured Wine: Rabble

Come and sit with us in the nursery. Grab your favorite stuffed animal friend to squeeze tight while we dive into the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1977). Read along with us while we explore the many treasures of the Hundred Acre Wood such as: - Christopher Robin’s weapons stockpile - Eating 12 JARS OF HONEY will transform your butt into a moose - Brenna’s Plurple/Plink Podcasting Ball Gown - Piglet’s sudden eviction following two natural disasters - Tigger’s GPS capabilities - Rabbit hates everyone… except Piglet who also dislikes everyone Featured Wine: Dark Hundred

Oo-de-lally, we’re all in need of a pick-me-up! Hope you all are staying safe out there. It’s an odd time, but here comes Disney’s favorite rapscallion to steal your isolation blues away! It’s Robin Hood (1973)! Follow along with us and resident raconteur rooster Alan-A-Dale while we recount Robin’s many adventures in cross-dressing, stew-ruining, and show-offing (?) and together we’ll discover: -A continuation of our newfound ability to describe wine in the least appetizing way possible. -Disney animators stick it to the man! Down with the government! -A gentlemanly tournament of skill becomes a butt-stabbing football game. -Open up that blue bin and pull out some recycled animation. -Prince John arrests an entire kingdom and makes us very very sad. -The unsung reveal of Little John’s mad archery skills -The birth of our new mascot, the Winocerous! Featured Wine: Troublemaker

Haven’t you ever looked upon your life and thought about how much better it would be if you were a cat? Of course you have! At least, Maurice Chevalier says so. And thus begins our journey to 1910s Paris (or Peru?) to follow the adventures of The Aristocats (1970). As we follow our fancy feline friends through the countryside and city, we reflect on: - Brenna’s scatalogical wine-grading scale - The birds and the bees... and the lava and the pterodactyls... - Winnie the Pooh brings crackers to the roofie party - Dogs try to eat a motorcycle? - The newest member of the X-Men: Joseph Wolverine and his crossword puzzle skills - Another one of the many Disney kitchen chases, but with a drunk goose Featured Wine: Fat Cat

Episode 13 - The Jungle Book or... Winnie the Pooh: Jungle Strangler In the jungle the mighty jungle, the lion… is nowhere to be found in this film. Grab your canoes and head down the nearest waterfall with us as we venture deep into The Jungle Book (1967). Now on this journey we may not experience the back side of water, but we do see: That his takes place in India, and definitely not in America. Deja vu while watching the defeat of Kaa Elephants: Hurph hurph hurph hurph.. Brenna’s intense hatred for monkeys. Like REALLY hates monkeys. No guys, seriously she hates them. Like really, really hates monkeys The Bambi Khan-spiracy #sherekhankilledbambismom The seductive human girl and her tantalizing... eyebrows? Featured Wine: Bear-itage

Hear Ye, Hear Ye: By Decree of the Royal Court of… Nobody (apparently) Thou art Invited to Attend the Recapitulation of this Tale of young Wart in this his first Journey to the Throne, THE SWORD IN THE STONE. Heed the Wandering Folderol of Aquatic, Avian, and… Squirrelian Transfiguration as well as some of these Other fine Particulars of Discussion: - Merlin: Master of time, space, magic, and science elects to live… where none of that matters - Wile E. Coyote shows up (and has more screen time than most characters) - Sir Haum-Schaumch earns his big day in London - There are way too many dishes in that castle - 20 minutes left and no villain yet? - 8 minutes left and no SWORD yet? IT’S IN THE TITLE AND THERE’S STILL NO SWORD YET?!?! Featured Wine: Castle Rock

Bark Ba-Bark Bark! Bark! Woof! Awooooooo! Bark Bark!! For those of you not familiar with the Twilight Bark: Welcome back to our podcast! Join us for our recap of 1961’s 101 DALMATIANS. Once again, Disney has abandoned the princesses and has returned to the pound to recreate the magic achieved previously with Lady and the Tramp. And boy does it work like gangbusters! A few stray (har har) points we touch on: - One of Disney’s most malicious villians is really just a weird family friend with a weak stomach. - Favorite cockney phrases like “Sling Slong mah Bing Bong” - The humble beginnings of the extended DDCU (Disney Dogs Cinematic Universe). - Way too much time spent on a bad bark-based morse code translation. - Cake sandwich? - The future of animation is here and it is called XEROX!! Featured Wine: The Velvet Devil

Sorry for the long rest guys. But true love’s kiss has awakened us and we’re ready to jump back in, full steam ahead. And what better way to celebrate our rejuvenation than to watch the misguided adventure of Disney’s groggiest princess: SLEEPING BEAUTY. In this episode we dive into the thrilling intrigue of the most logical and intelligent Disney plot ever put to film! Just kidding. The plot is straight garbage. But don’t it look and sound so purdy, though? We SKUMPS it up and revisit this Disney classic and put it to the test: Is it as good as we remember? Have fairies masterminded the perfect plan? Will we ever beat tuberculosis? And who is the absolute best and smartest character in this film that also happens to turn into a giant dragon and get killed by magic that can only be used to bring happiness but can also somehow enact murder? You’ll have to listen to find out…(No, Absolutely Not, Yes, Maleficent. Okay maybe you don’t have to, but we think you should). Please join us! Featured Wines: The Dreaming Tree and Prophesy

Hey folks, do you have a dog? Do you know anyone who has a dog? Here’s the bigger question: can you give us your dog? We’ll wait. K, thnx. We’ve always been dog-lovers but that love has been stoked to a red hot obsession as we watched 1955’s Lady and the Tramp. Listen, I know we’re all familiar with the spaghetti scene, but really think about it: Two dogs. On a date. Eating spaghetti. To live music. Like, forget all you know about cartoons and imagine it for real. Has your heart melted yet? Join us for an adventure of class propriety in the dog community, a deep undercurrent of some incredibly adult themes, the evolution of familial obligations, and TWO DOGS ON A DATE!!! Featured Wine: Romanelli Chianti

Gillian. Hey Gillian. Pssssst… Wanna know a secret? We stole your DVD of PETER PAN. Yes folks, we have pulled off the heist of the century. In true pirate fashion, we have stolen someone’s possessions in order to provide you with that sweet podcast content you all crave. In this episode, slap on a spanking of Pixie dust, think of happy thoughts of story foreshadowing and join us for a trip to Neverland, led by everyone’s favorite rude dude with attitude. Here we discover the Darling boys’ oddly non-existent memory functions, Wendy’s constant uphill battle for any crumb of respect, and the Crocodile’s inability to keep his food down. Odd’s fish, this is a long one, but there’s plenty to discuss! Featured Wine: Poizin

We gather here today to mourn the loss of Bill, our favorite chimney sweeping salamander who was rocketed from this existence by a gargantuan sneeze. In Bill’s memory, let us recount the full story surrounding his disappearance, that of his oppressor: ALICE IN WONDERLAND That’s right, we go down the rabbit hole (see what we did there?) and follow Alice’s insatiable desire to find a rabbit party. Listen as we discuss Alice’s schizophrenic self-mumblings, the length of time dedicated to falling, the Carpenter’s culpability in oyster-cide, some very self absorbed flowers, the King of Hearts’ very specific ruling style, and drugs... lots of drugs. Featured Wine: King Rabbit

New Year Surprise! Bonus Content! For this very special bonus episode of Wine You Wish Upon a Star, we welcome longtime fan and family member to the show, Avery O’Neal. Having recently turned 21, she has been invited to dive into our world of cinematic tipsiness and recount a film of her choosing: Tinkerbell: Secret of the Wings Here we explore the magic of fairy sisterhood, forbidden love among seasons, some conveniently missing Sun Fairies that could have solved everything, and our own invention of magical creatures: Tinklebells and Tinkerbears. Featured Wine: Kiamie

We did it, folks! We're past the doldrums of Disney's wartime propaganda machine and into the era of CLASSIC DISNEY PRINCESSES. Get ready for a string of beloved classics, starting with 1950's Cinderella. We marvel at the extended slapstick of literal cat-and-mouse chases, our hero's comical mood swings, so many tiny clothes, and a romance that takes longer than two seconds to blossom. Featured Wine: True Myth

This one is a two-fer! On this latest episode of Wine You Wish Upon A Star, we watch The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad. Separately. No, we didn't watch it in separate rooms. I meant that their adventures are separate. Could you imagine? A headless horseman chasing an insane amphibian in a motorcar? Preposterous. Anyhow, it's fun. Give it a go! Featured Wine: Meritage by Kiamie

Ears up! Man is in the forest! Join us on Wine You Wish Upon A Star as we dive into the bloodiest political drama this side of Game of Thrones... Bambi. We cover everything from excessively face-washing mice, infinitely patient parents, hot-blooded abstinence vows, a possible Fight Club-esque twist, and of course, RONNO!!! (Good ol' Ronno). Come watch the classic that you thought was too sad or boring to revisit as an adult. We promise, it's wonderful. Featured Wine: Carnivore

Choo choo! What's that sound? Why it's the circus coming to town! Welcome to our viewing of Dumbo! Head on down with us to Florida (of all places) for Disney's condemnation on animal cruelty... just kidding! It celebrates it! We pop open a bottle of non-LSD laced wine and watch as Disney casually avoids answering where babies come from; we ponder if this film is responsible for elephants' mouse phobia; and we demand answers to Timothy the Mouse's potentially tragic backstory. Featured Wine: Unlocked, by Kiamie #justiceforMrsJumbo

Welcome back to another auditory chapter of our inebriated tour of Disney's most cherished of classic animated feature films. Today, we journey to Italy with the 1940 adaptation of Carlo Collodi's fairy tale, Pinocchio. Watch as a cricket, resembling nothing remotely insectoid, flirts with anything his size. See a wooden boy cry water tears whilst a man eats an onion whole. And eavesdrop on the boy-stealing, money-making craze hatching at the local Red Lobster. Featured Wine: Cooks Sparkling Brut

Welcome to our first episode of Wine You Wish Upon A Star, a new Disney Fancast wherein two adults drink wine and watch your favorite Disney animated classics... and then drink more wine and discuss how adulthood has warped their perception. In our first episode, we watch the first theatrically released feature, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Watch a scullery maid command 200 woodland animals to break into a private residence and spread bird flu. Featured Wine: Magic Maker Rosé