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Today's guest, Dr. John Norcross, is an internationally recognized authority on behavior change and psychotherapy. Dr. Norcross is the author of more than 400 scholarly publications, and his work has been featured in hundreds of media interviews. In this episode, Dr. Norcross provides insight on setting our New Year's resolutions: the history behind the tradition, how we keep them, and the reasons behind why we let them slip. Tune in to hear Dr. Norcross explain how the pandemic affected our resolutions, the number one resolution people make each year, the statistics on how many succeed, and the research behind how a “slip” can become a success. IN THIS EPISODE: [03:00] There is a historical and psychological tradition to resolutions. [05:00] Weight loss is at the top of the list of New Year's resolutions for Americans [08:00] The success rate for resolutions is actually higher than many people think. . [10:00] Not only Americans have this concept of a New Year's resolution. [15:00] There is no difference when people make changes at other times of the year, other than they gain a lot more support from the society due to the timing at the beginning of a year. [19:00] Create reminders for resolutions, and limit exposure to high risk situations. KEY TAKEAWAYS: New Year's resolutions stem back to ancient and medieval times. 60% of Americans declare to make a resolution in December but come New Year's day only 35 to 40% actually do so. There are ways to successfully stick to your resolutions, like creating reminders, declaring your intentions publicly, and limiting exposure to high risk situations. BIO: An internationally recognized authority on behavior change and psychotherapy, Dr. John C. Norcross is Distinguished Professor & Chair of Psychology at the University of Scranton, Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at SUNY Upstate Medical University, and a board-certified clinical psychologist. Author of more than 400 scholarly publications, Dr. Norcross has co-written or edited 25 books, most of them in multiple editions. These include the 5-volume APA Handbook of Clinical Psychology, Psychotherapy Relationships that Work, and Systems of Psychotherapy: A Transtheoretical Analysis, now in its 9th edition. He also published the acclaimed self-help books, Changeology and Changing for Good (with Prochaska & DiClemente). Dr. Norcross has been elected president of the American Psychological Association (APA) Society of Clinical Psychology, the APA Division of Psychotherapy, and the Society for the Exploration of Psychotherapy Integration. He has served on the Board of Directors of the National Register of Health Service Psychologists as well as on APA's governing Council of Representatives. Dr. Norcross edited the Journal of Clinical Psychology: In Session for a decade and has been on the editorial boards of a dozen journals. Dr. Norcross has also served as a clinical and research consultant to a number of organizations, including the National Institutes of Health and pharmaceutical companies. A Fellow of 10 professional associations, he has been honored with APA's Distinguished Career Contributions to Education & Training Award, the Pennsylvania Professor of the Year from the Carnegie Foundation, and election to the National Academies of Practice. His work has been featured in hundreds of media interviews, and he has appeared dozens of times on national television shows, such as the Today Show, CBS Sunday Morning, and CNN. www.changeologybook.com/ www.scranton.edu/faculty/norcross/index.shtml https://www.facebook.com/john.c.norcross
In this episode, Dr. John Norcross is back to provide insight on how the science of behavior change can help us be successful in keeping our resolutions not only in the new year but throughout the year! Dr. John Norcross is an internationally recognized authority on behavior change and psychotherapy. Dr. Norcross is the author of more than 400 scholarly publications, and his work has been featured in hundreds of media interviews. In this episode, Dr. Norcross discusses the science behind making resolutions and change, and his book ‘Changeology' which is based on 40 years of scientific research. IN THIS EPISODE: [04:00] The book Changeology [06:00] The five steps in making change [08:00] The right thing at the right time [11:00] How to maintain change [15:00] Population-based interventions [18:00] Getting back on the horse KEY TAKEAWAYS: It takes 90 days to implement real change The book Changeology will help you not only with addictions but a variety of areas including relationship issues and organizational change. If you slip up, get back on the horse. BIO: An internationally recognized authority on behavior change and psychotherapy, Dr. John C. Norcross is Distinguished Professor & Chair of Psychology at the University of Scranton, Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at SUNY Upstate Medical University, and a board-certified clinical psychologist. Author of more than 400 scholarly publications, Dr. Norcross has co-written or edited 25 books, most of them in multiple editions. These include the 5-volume APA Handbook of Clinical Psychology, Psychotherapy Relationships that Work, and Systems of Psychotherapy: A Transtheoretical Analysis, now in its 9th edition. He also published the acclaimed self-help books, Changeology and Changing for Good (with Prochaska & DiClemente). Dr. Norcross has been elected president of the American Psychological Association (APA) Society of Clinical Psychology, the APA Division of Psychotherapy, and the Society for the Exploration of Psychotherapy Integration. He has served on the Board of Directors of the National Register of Health Service Psychologists as well as on APA's governing Council of Representatives. Dr. Norcross edited the Journal of Clinical Psychology: In Session for a decade and has been on the editorial boards of a dozen journals. Dr. Norcross has also served as a clinical and research consultant to a number of organizations, including the National Institutes of Health and pharmaceutical companies. A Fellow of 10 professional associations, he has been honored with APA's Distinguished Career Contributions to Education & Training Award, the Pennsylvania Professor of the Year from the Carnegie Foundation, and election to the National Academies of Practice. His work has been featured in hundreds of media interviews, and he has appeared dozens of times on national television shows, such as the Today Show, CBS Sunday Morning, and CNN. www.changeologybook.com/ www.scranton.edu/faculty/norcross/index.shtml https://www.facebook.com/john.c.norcross
Every client or patient who seeks mental health support comes with unique needs, perspectives, and preferences. As a result, it's unlikely that any single therapy approach can work for every person who encounters it. According to Dr. John C. Norcross, therapists have greater success working with clients when they take an integrative approach that draws from different techniques and models to suit each person's needs and preferences. John is Distinguished Professor & Chair of Psychology at the University of Scranton and is recognised as a leading authority on psychotherapy integration. In this episode of Being Human, John joins Dr. Chua Sook Ning to talk about the nature and importance of psychotherapy integration, and they discuss what therapists can do to better understand and help their clients, and cut therapy drop-out rates by up to 50%. John also shares insights on the key ingredients new therapists should develop if they want to become effective practitioners. For more information on Relate Malaysia and our services, visit www.relate.com.my or email us at: inquiries@relate.com.my
There are many phases of change we go through in life. Retirement is one of them. Changing for Good: A Revolutionary Six-Stage Program by John C. Norcross details the 6 stages of change. On today's show, we will be discussing the first 3 stages: pre-contemplation, contemplation, and preparation. These are the mental and emotional hurdles we must go through when we make a change. Learning about the way we transition is an important tool in navigating retirement. The pre-contemplation phase could also be called the denial stage. At this point, you probably don't even recognize there is an issue that needs to be addressed. We see this with couples a lot, one spouse wants to lock down on their retirement planning while the other doesn't see the financial problems that need to be focused on. Usually, spouses are on different phases of change and they must work as a team to make things happen. After getting past pre-contemplation, we move on to contemplation. Here you understand there is a problem that needs to be looked into. Maybe you are spending too much on takeout or perhaps you are still supporting your adult children. In many cases, this can cause issues in your own retirement. You may not be ready to make adjustments, but you are thinking about the problem and that is leading you down the path of change. You are contemplating how these financial issues are affecting your future and your goals. The last mental phase is the preparation phase. Now you fully understand that something needs to change. Do you want to retire early? At this stage, you are making a plan to accomplish this goal. You start saving more and structuring your plan to support early retirement. This can be an emotional part of the change, making small easy attainable goals can help keep you on track. So how do you know where you are? Have you acknowledged a problem that needs to be addressed? Do you realize what needs to take place? It's important to ask yourself these questions and do some self-reflection. You'll want to be emotionally prepared to make the financial decisions you need to. If we want to see changes in our life, we must make changes within ourselves. Listen to the full episode for more details or skip around to certain topics. 1:16 – A new tree 2:40 – First 3 stages of change 6:22 – Precontemplation 8:30 – Contemplation 10:06 – Preparation 11:46 – What can we ask ourselves? 16:12 – Can you do this? 17:50 – Will you do this? 21:33 – Where these stories go For more, visit us online at http://flemingfinancialservices.com
This is EPISODE #35, focusing on understanding how the brain works to break those bad habits that zap your energy so you can have a highly productive 2020. Welcome to the “Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning” podcast, my name is Andrea Samadi, I’m a former educator who has been fascinated with understanding the science behind high performance strategies in schools, sports and the workplace for the past 20 years.As we are well into our New Year, and new decade, I am sure you have been thinking about ways that you want to improve this year over the last. Have you thought about what specific actions you’ll take? Have you thought about the activities that you’ll start, stop, and continue? This is a good place to start as we are evaluating what worked for us last year, and keep doing more of what’s working, with an awareness of what didn’t work. Once we know what we want to change, then we will look at how the brain forms habits, so we can break them.WHAT YOU WILL START THIS YEAR: Think about positive behaviors that you would like to implement in your life. Do you want to be more self-aware? More proactive? More forgiving? Do you want to take more action, or more doing vs thinking and planning? Look at the START/STOP/CONTINUE graphic in the show notes and think about what actions you want to begin this year.WHAT YOU WILL STOP: Do you have some habits that you need to let go of? You know what they are, the ones that zap your energy, with an impact on your productivity. If you have some habits that are draining you, you’ll be well aware of what they are. Write them down. There’s never a better time than now to become aware of what needs to go this year.WHAT YOU WILL CONTINUE: Think about the things in your life that gave you energy, joy, and happiness. You will probably want to keep those things on your list for 2020. Whatever brought you focus and inspiration, should stay this year.How Exactly Do We Break Bad Habits?This article was originally published on Achieveit360.com blog.We Must Understand How the Brain Learns to Forms Habits, in Order to Break Them.I learned the idea of "neurons that fire together, wire together" from Mark Robert Waldman, (from EPISODE 30)[i] the world's leading expert on communication, learning and the brain. If you think about it, it’s kind of obvious—where your attention goes, your energy flows. Never underestimate your own power and be mindful of where you place your attention, especially when you want to improve your focus. This year be intentional about where you are placing your attention. When "neurons are out of sync, they fail to link"[ii] so when you are not working on or thinking about something that you want, maybe because your attention is being taken away by something else, the neurons will not link, the neural pathways will not be formed, and eventually the neurons for what you want will prune away, since you have not applied the correct focus with your attention. This is exactly why people fail to achieve what they want. They have not properly applied their attention. So how can we safeguard ourselves from this happening in 2020? Let’s dive deeper into our brain to see what’s happening. We have around 100 billion brain nerve cells called neurons that connect the brain to the body. "If you took 100 billion sheets of paper and stacked them on top of each other, it would be 5,000 miles high. That's the distance from Los Angeles to London!" (Dr. Joe Dispenza, TED TALK, Feb 8, 2013). This puts the vastness of your brain into perspective.Each neuron has one axon with many tails (terminals). When you are learning, the axon terminals send electrochemical messages to other neurons across tiny spaces called synapses.Learning creates a synaptic connection when you are thinking, feeling, or actually doing something new. New neural pathways are formed. This is how you create a new habit.Breaking a habit is just the opposite; by avoiding certain thoughts, feelings or actions, your impulses or neural connections become weaker and weaker. Just as knowledge and skills are constructed in our brain with focus, they also diminish without the focused attention. As we learn, our dendrites actually grow as they make new synaptic connections. Learning something new happens when we forge these new connections."Neurons that fire together, wire together" and "neurons that are out of sync, fail to link." It is easy to see now that "we are what we think about" or "we create our reality" as we do reinforce our neural pathways with attention to the habits or goals that we want. We even reinforce what we don’t want when we are thinking " I don't want that piece of pie" or " I don't want this project to fail" or “I don’t want to lose that game” and so on. The neural pathways for “I don’t want this or that” are being formed! See how tricky this can be. Our brain only knows what we tell it, so we must be very careful with our thoughts, feelings, and actions, as they will cause our conditions, and circumstances.Are You Ready to Break Some Bad Habits?Now that we can clearly see how the brain works, we must now apply this to our daily lives if we expect change. This is the hard part. Change is difficult, uncomfortable, and hard work. Most people won’t do this, but if you are ready to take your results to the next level, stay with me here. Anyone can break out of old habits and personalize this new knowledge for new results. Once we are aware of what we want to change, then we must take the action steps needed for this change to take place. To mentally prepare for a whole new way of thinking, being and taking action, I highly recommend reading John C. Norcross’ book Changeology: 5 Steps to Realizing Your Goals and Resolutions.[iii] This book will prepare you to accomplish something that you have never done before. You can find a PDF overview[iv] of the book to get an idea of the 5 steps he takes you through in pursuit of what change you want to tackle.Here Are 5 Ideas for Breaking Habits that No Longer Serve You1. Replace the bad habit with a good habit and begin to strengthen the new neural pathway. If you want to give up coffee in the morning, replace it with hot lemon water. With time, the neural pathway of the old habit of drinking coffee will prune away with the new habit of drinking hot lemon tea. Write out any bad habits that depletes your energy, and beside the habit, write out something more positive that you will replace the habit with.Put This into Action:Here’s an example: Every year, at the start of the year, sometimes over the summer, I do a no sugar, no alcohol challenge, for at least for 30 days. This year, to launch the new decade, I am doing the challenge for 90 days. If you have never done this, it really is a powerful activity. When you cut out toxins, or foods that are known to be bad for our bodies and brain, something amazing happens. After the first 2 weeks, the cravings go away, and you won’t miss the food you used to enjoy. It will actually taste bad if you sneak a taste because your brain and body has become used to the clean, healthy foods, making the bad foods feel poisonous, which helps to continue with the new habit.You will gain some new awareness about yourself with this challenge. When I cut out drinking wine with my dinner, I replaced wine with carbonated water, (following the tip of replacing the bad habit with a more healthy one) but I drink the water in a wine glass. I realized that it’s not the wine I miss, it’s actually the glass! I would love to hear about any new awareness’s you have had if you have eliminated toxic foods from your diet to help others to perhaps give it a shot.2. Try brain-training. Over time and repetition, you can change old habits, and beliefs with guided meditations or affirmations. I use John Assaraf's programs at www.myneurogym.com and Dr. Daniel Siegel’s (EPISODE 28) Wheel of Awareness. [v]There are many different meditation or relaxation apps you can download and use on your phone. The key is to use something. Visit our episode #25 where Mick Neustadt discusses how meditation and mindfulness changes your life.[vi]Put This into ActionIf you want to change your brain, old patterns, habits or beliefs that operate within your subconscious mind, brain training is an excellent first step, but it’s not a quick fix. Results with brain training will come with time, effort, practice, persistence and daily application. One day, you will be able to articulate the affects, but it doesn’t happen overnight. Brain training definitely has helped me to relax about certain things, bringing me more peace and has been well worth the effort. If you are pressed for time, you don’t need to spend a long time doing this. Just a few minutes a day will allow you to calm your brain to improve your results and give you a sense of peace. You can search for mindfulness apps[vii], or play music that relaxes you.3. Create a daily habit tracking sheet to keep track of your daily habits. If you recall from Kent Healy’s episode 33[viii] that we all have the same amount of time, and that the most successful people in the world manage their time really well.Put This into ActionTo better manage your time and activities block off your activities that are non-negotiable on your calendar, and then you can add in negotiable activities around what you must do. Be clear about what could possibly take you away from the activities you have blocked off so that you don’t just cancel the important parts of your day when you are called to do something else. Protect your time, as it is your greatest asset. With the proper use of your time, you will see your results will soar. Click here if you would like to access the tracker that I use.4. Replace negative thinking with positive thinking. In order to break negative thought patterns, or ruminating, use something in your head to break this destructive pattern. Put This into ActionAn effective strategy used in cognitive behavioral therapy[ix] is to say the word “SWITCH” in your head as you focus on switching the negative emotion that you feel to something more positive. We all have automatic negative thoughts that come into our head at times, but we must have a strategy to stop them from ruminating or continuing in a loop, since we know that switching off these negative thoughts is an important step towards moving us towards our goals. I’ve always used the strategy of saying “STOP” when this happens and changing the thought pattern in my head to something more productive.5. Find an accountability partner who you can count on to keep you on track with your goals. Entrepreneur, investor, author and public speaker Gary Vaynerchuk did this when he wanted to lose weight. His trainer followed him around every minute of the day to keep him on track. You should be able to change your habits without having to go this extreme, but if you are still struggling, there are many ways to reach out to others and ask for help.I hope you have found these tips helpful and would love to hear from you if you do implement any of these ideas. I’m excited about the next few guests to launch the New Year with ideas, research and strategies that are being implemented around the world to improve performance in schools, sports and the workplace. Stay tuned! Happy New Year!REFERENCES:[i] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE 30 with Mark Robert Waldman https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/neuroscience-researcher-mark-robert-waldman-on-12-brain/id1469683141?i=1000458597396 [ii] Dr. Joe Dispenza and Lewis Howes “Where Your Attention Goes, Your Energy Goes.” (YouTube Published July 25, 2019) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Om435J7u1T8 [iii] John C Norcross Changeology https://www.amazon.com/Changeology-Steps-Realizing-Goals-Resolutions-ebook/dp/B006VJMYQC [iv] PDF Overview of the book Changeology http://www.isihome.ir/freearticle/ISIHome.ir-21161.pdf [v] https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/clinical-professor-psychiatry-at-ucla-school-medicine/id1469683141?i=1000456048761 [vi] https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mindfulness-meditation-expert-mick-neustadt-on-how/id1469683141?i=1000453919865 [vii] https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/top-meditation-iphone-android-apps#the-mindfulness-app[viii] https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/author-kent-healy-on-managing-time-our-greatest-asset/id1469683141?i=1000461240028 [ix] What is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with Therapist Kati Morton YouTube uploaded Sept. 23, 2013 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7B3n9jobus
Eating too much sugar? No problem! In January I will cut back. Not working out? No problem! In January I will hit the gym. Postponing our plans for change looks great under the glow of the holiday lights. But when we wake up each year on January 1st, hungover from too much celebrating, realizing with dread, that all of our plans for change in the New Year need to magically start RIGHT NOW, it is a very different story. All of the plans that we have been putting off until the New Year are suddenly very real and very pressing. We need to get it together and act before our Monger catches on. The deadline had arrived. For people with High Functioning Anxiety, the days leading up to the New Year are days full of possibility. Set the resolution, do the prep work, and, poof like magic, we will be different people. No wonder we are so depressed come the first week of January when we realize that the change we want is only going to happen with work and that the work is going to be hard. We were so focused on how amazing it would be once the change was done that we didn’t take into account what it would actually take to stop eating sugar or to work out every morning. We didn’t take into account the process of change. Throughout the month of January, we will be discussing this process of change with helpful tips and strategies for making small changes in your life without all the hype. Today we will be talking about why resolutions are so triggering and what the research shows for setting helpful resolutions. Listen to the full episode to hear: Why New Year’s can be very anxiety-inducing for people with High Functioning Anxiety What the research actually shows about making resolutions for change in the New Year What we can do about it once we know the research and identify our own tendencies 5 tips for not falling prey to the romance of New Year’s eve How to embrace this New Year with a fresh outlook, new tools, and--yes--a happier approach. Links: Research by University of Scranton Psychology Professor John C. Norcross, Ph.D https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/2980864 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11920693 Research by Ayelet Fishbach, University of Chicago, and Kaitlin Woolley, Cornell University https://faculty.chicagobooth.edu/ayelet.fishbach/research/Woolley&FishbachPSPB.pdf Prelude to the Dance by Oriah Mountain Dreamer High Functioning Anxiety can be at it’s worst around the New Year. Whether it’s your resolutions or everyone else’s, you can feel yourself regularly cycling through scripts that tell you you’re not good enough unless you’re flawless, constantly available, and solving everyone else’s problems. I’d love to help you embrace this new year with a fresh outlook, new tools, and--yes--a happier approach. I specialize in helping women like you living with High Functioning Anxiety to let go and make peace themselves. Plus, coaching with me doesn’t have to take up tons of room in your already full schedule. I work one-on-one with women like you to deconstruct why anxiety creeps up on you and give you something to do about it. Click here to learn more about working with me through on-demand coaching!
Judy Dang is a Corporate Productivity Trainer and Coach and founder of Avid at Work. Judy helps companies and ambitious idea people become more productive, move past overwhelm, and achieve their goals faster. She delivers interactive workshops on prioritizing, better work habits, and how to deal with the technology ooze. She also works one-on-one with professionals to finally get those important projects done. Clients hire Judy when they way they work no longer works. She’s like a personal trainer, but for work. When not working, she can be found on the trails at Lands End in San Francisco, making lemon meringue pie, or reading multiple books at the same time. Links to resources mentioned during the interview: Schedule a 25-minute call with Judy Time Timer Changeology by Professor John C. Norcross Thank God It's Monday "Flow" TED Talk by Professor Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi Pomodoro Technique
Ever feel like life is a merry-go-round, without a lot of “merry”? If you’ve seen many New Year’s come and go, you probably know the feeling. Been here. Done that. New Year’s resolutions that are broken before they are cold. According to statistics, the percentage of Americans who keep their New Year's resolution for one month is 55. Who keep it for six months: 40. Who keep it for two years: 19 (John C. Norcross, et.al.; and "Addictive Behaviors" reported in U.S. News & World Report, 1/16/89. Leadership, Vol. 10). Truth is, there’s a long history of that kind of frustration and failure. Starting this Sunday, we’re going to walk through the Old Testament book of Judges. It reveals that the children of Israel were not so different from us. We will learn from their experiences both what not to do and what to do to be victorious in the challenges we face. Carousel: The Broken Heroes of Judges “When Life Is a Merry-Go-Round (Minus the Merry)” Judges 1-2 Dependence on the Lord Disobedience to the Lord Distress from the Lord Deliverance by the Lord
We kick of 2018 full of optimism, gratitude and excitement for the year ahead. After what was hopefully a nice Christmas break we all are raring to go, and apparently as many as 50% of us (myself included!) feel that customary urge to set some resolutions for the year ahead. The top resolutions that we make (the 50% that do!) are; weight loss, exercise related, smoking/alcohol related and money related. So even as a broad estimate this suggests that 15% of the population in Ireland try to motivate themselves into better money management habits at the beginning of the year. According to Professor John C. Norcross Ph.D of University of Scranton Psychology USA, 10% of all resolutions result in sustainable change. Pretty poor that therefore 90% of all resolutions crash and burn! We are keen students and readers of all things performance, behaviour and success related here. Never-mind it's impact on how we deal with our money, the ability to perform, behave or succeed has such huge impact on our life and the lives of those around us. For this reason we decided to kick-off 2018 with something a little different (this will be a common theme to 2018!). What Do Resolutions Look Like? Resolutions are often very broad and sweeping statements. I will give us smoking. I will spend less money. I will clear my credit card. I will eat less Ben & Jerry Ice-Cream! They all sound worthy, they are probably all very well-intentioned, however they are all vague. There is no time line, no specific action, no measure as to whether it was a success, or way of measuring progress. As a serial resolution-maker of maybe 10 years now I, for one, can confirm that they just don't work! Not only that but by the end of January I've probably passed the self-deprecating phase of under-performance and am firmly into the 'I actually didn't want to change' phase by March. By April it's 'I can't remember what my resolutions were' phase!! A resolution is defined as a 'firm decision to do or not do something'. Essentially the above resolutions, or decisions to do or not do something are based on habits, smoking habits, eating habits, exercise habits, money habits. Habits as we all know can be very difficult to change, hence they are habits! Why Do Resolutions Fail?? We've done quite a lot of reading on this, seems there are a few trains of thought we will share here now, that might prove useful if you are one of the 'resolutioners' who struggle with making progress on your resolutions! Take what you will from these, some may seem more credible than others, perhaps see which one sits best for you! 1) False-Hope-Syndrome: When we make resolutions we often aim too high relative to what we truly believe we can achieve! For example, If I'm eating 15 portions of junk-food/snack per week and I set a resolution for myself of cutting all junk-food from my diet, my internal dialogue/subconscious is already telling me (quietly!) that 'there's no way in hell you're going to be able to do this'!! We have all heard of false-hope, so essentially what this train of thought suggests is that some of the resolutions we set for ourselves are walking ourselves into it, and a confidence-bashing if/when we fail to reach the targets we set ourselves! 2) Cause & Effect: This idea stems from the suggestion that when we set a resolution, and we actually do the new habit for a period, that if we don't notice the desired effect immediately we can become de-motivated and fall back into old habits! So, lets say I decide I want to be 'better with my money'. If I watch my spending, open a savings account and start popping money in for a few weeks, and maybe even start contributing to that pension that I had been putting off. Well unless I get the desired feeling and feedback from having done that i am in high risk of cancelling the whole friggin' lot and going back to my old ways! We love feedback, we love knowing that what we are doing is having a positive impact and that we will be much better off as a result. If we don't get that feedback quickly we might fall off the wagon! 3) Self-Stories: This suggests that we ALL have internal self-stories, views on how we see ourselves living and behaving. This internal and mostly subconscious viewpoint determines much of our behaviours, habits and importantly our decisions. Your subconscious has predetermined, based on your self-stories and self-talk, what decision you will make when you are confronted by the choice between a salad or chips and burger for lunch on the 18th January!! It does also suggest however that we have the power to change our internal self-stories now. We can, through visualisation and goal-setting change how we see ourselves living and behaving. This is said to be one of the single most powerful tools in performing as we want to perform, to achieving what we want to achieve and in ultimately changing habits. Say for example that you wanted to clear the debt you owe on a credit card. Up to now you had been slow to clear it, instead you have in the past made unnecessary purchases, clothes, cars and other items instead of actually clearing your debt. If you have been this way for years then your self-story will likely re-affirm for you that you are 'bad at clearing debt' and that you 'love to buy nice things instead'. That is your self-story, for you right now it seems true. However you can change that story....we can convince ourselves of a new self-story, one whereby we will see ourselves as 'great at paying off debts quickly' and 'able to resist impulse purchases easily'. When we are next faced with a decision about what to do with the €300 left in your bank account on the last day of the month, you are much more likely to act in a way that is congruent with your new self-story.....you'll most likely happily direct that money to your credit card as opposed to spending it in Arnotts! What Could We Do Instead of Setting Resolutions? If you have been setting them then the research suggests that you are very likely to have failed. That doesn't obviously mean you should quit resolutions (ironic!). However there is a lot of research out there that suggests we should not frame desired behaviour change as 'resolutions' for ourselves. Instead there are, for example, some really powerful goal-setting tools that we could use to help us get to where we want to get to. Instead of having a broad resolution such as 'I will get better with my spending habits', try and build a goal using the following framework, SMART. Specific: Try and be as specific as possible about the behaviour/habit you want to create. Don't aim to do lots of things, focus on the really important thing for you. Pick one not 5! Measurable: If it is not measurable in some way then it will be impossible to know if you are making progress (feedback) Attractive: It must appeal to you, deep-down be of meaning to you. If not it will fall by the way-side when life gets in the way! Realistic: It much be realistic, by all means make it stretching but not crazy stuff! (false-hope) Timely: If you are aiming to be doing the new habit, by what date exactly do you want to be doing it, and for how many days/weeks in a row. Ideally aim to do whatever it is your doing within the next 3-5 months max, any longer and it is too easy to put if off until 'another time'! Using the above tool (which has been around for centuries by the way, not my creation!) may just help turn a vague and broad resolution into a really appealing, measurable and sustainable goal to be achieved by a certain date in the near future. What Else Might Help? The research shows, and personally I believe it, that if your goal is written down then you are much much more likely to achieve it, whether it is a goal, a habit, a behaviour, the action of writing it down, and ideally being able to see it regularly will keep it at the fore-front of your mind, might help re-write your self-story, and enable you to do whatever it is you have set for yourself. It's probably worth noting too that they suggest it takes 21 days to form a new habit. It's kinda hard to understand how they have measured this! Irrespective of how long it actually takes it's probably fair to say that when we set off on our quest to reach our goal we should be patient with ourselves, good things don't generally happen over-night....so expect it to take some time! If we can be of any support to you over the year then by all means feel free to use us! If we can act as an accountability partner, or someone to check in with on soem queries then please do so...if we can help we will help. Looking forward massively to a hugely fun and full 2018! Paddy Delaney QFA | RPA | APA | Qualified Coach
Productivity Book Group [ http://productivitybookgroup.org ] discussed Changeology: 5 Steps to Realizing Your Goals and Resolutions [ http://amzn.to/1lL2EIl ] by John C. Norcross, PhD. Enjoy the discussion! Amazon Book Description: CHANGE IS HARD. But […]