The Single Mom Podcast - Single Parent Advice, Support & a Little Bit of Humor

This episode is going to be all about why I took that hiatus the reason behind it. There will also be information, suggestions, and advice on how you can not go through what I went through or how you can choose to do what I did. And that it's okay. The power of taking a pause on things that aren't serving you, are taking too much energy or time when you don't have any to give and why you need to start making yourself a priority here and there. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Many parents have children diagnosed with ADHD and navigating that aspect of parenting can be confusing. In this episode we chat with Peter Shankman – a renowned author, entrepreneur, and ADHD advocate who has not only thrived with ADHD himself but has also become a leading voice in helping parents, educators, and caregivers navigate the challenges and opportunities of raising kids with ADHD. He has just released his latest book for kids with ADHD, The Boy with the Faster Brain, which helps kids understand their ADHD is a gift and that they are brilliant, not broken. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's like lately every other ad I come across is for some brand of shape wear intended to help women appear skinnier and more sucked in (for lack of a better term) and I honestly hate it. As women I think that we have been told too often that we are only beautiful if we are thin. We shouldn't look like we have bumps, lumps or curves. I don't know about you, but I am tired of that narrative and so was Susie Taaffe to CEO and Founder of Skanties. On this episode I interview Susie and we talk all about why she created Skanties, how she started a business AFTER her divorce and tips on how to thrive as a single mom. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Politics can be a touchy subject for many but as a mom I believe that it is important to talk about with my kids. I believe that it is important for my children, when age appropriate, to learn about things that will potentially effect them in their lives as they get older and why it is important as citizens to participate in our democracy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For those who have ever experienced unhealthy or toxic relationships - whether with our exes, co-parents, our own parents or even friends - you have likely experienced gas lighting in one form or another at some point. Gas lighting is a form of emotional abuse and can be hard to deal with. In this episode we talk all about what gas lighting is, how it can present and ways to help you manage it if it happens to you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week's episode is all about communication and why it is so important to develop strong communication skills with your kids. If you start early and continue to work on and build those skills then as they get older they will be more likely to come to you with questions, problems and advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this weeks podcast episode I talk with Heather Black, founder and CEO of SuperMums about her story and how she was able to completely change her life by changing her career path. After the arrival of her second daughter Heather realized that her knowledge of Salesforce gave her a specialized skill set that could offer her the flexibility she wanted to work from home and support her family. Now she trains others how to do the same. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Recently I had an interaction with someone who made me realize that not everyone measures success in the same way. As a single mom, I don't measure my success by how much money I have or what I own, but in how happy my kiddos are how good our relationships are. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The last podcast episode I aired before coming back was in August of 2022 - almost a year ago. I really hate that I stopped creating episodes for The Single Mom Podcast, but there were a lot of things going on and I just couldn't devote the energy to it. This episode explains some of the reasons I stayed away so long. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As parents we know that too much screen time for our kids isn't great, but let's face it we have all been guilty of it at one time or another. In this interview with Drew from Tonies we will be discussing some of the downsides of too much screen time and the amazing alternative that Tonies offers for kids that helps inspire and build the creative process in kids. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As moms we will often just excuse our lack of focus or being a bit scatterbrained on our kids or the fact that we always have so much going on. But what if it is actually something more? What if, like me, you are struggling with adult ADHD? I discovered that even though my kids are older and don't require so much of my focus that I STILL was struggling to get things done and it was becoming a huge problem. So I decided to ask my doctor if there might be something else going on. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As moms we often will stop doing the things we want to do for ourselves or NEED to do for ourselves. Why? Sometimes it is because we think we will be judged or made to feel like we are bad moms. Too often we allow those feelings to keep us from doing the things that we want to do or that would make us happy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today is my birthday!!! Christmas in July is how my kids remember it. I turned 45 today. And after 45 years I have gotten to a point where I am so happy with the person I am and am doing all the things that I want to do. I am doing things to make myself happy. I wasted a lot of years saying no to things that I wanted to do and I realize how much I missed out on by letting fear and worry keep me from. So I won't do that anymore. I do the things. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Recently a friend of mine had a young man come to her after running away because he felt safe at her home. Coming from a home life that had been in turmoil for so long this young man told my friend that he would rather die than keep feeling the way he was feeling. Too often we don't realize that our children are dealing with a lot of problems and they don't always feel like they can come to us. Which is why it is so important to make sure that they feel like they have a safe space to express when they aren't doing ok. If it can't be with you then helping them find someone who they can go to. We can't ignore the fact that they struggle just like we do sometimes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I took off last week from posting an episode because I was vacationing in Hawaii! For the first time in 21 years I was able to take a kid free vacation only to come home and be faced with having to make the hard decision to put our 14 year old dog Shiloh to sleep. After so many amazing years with our family, she was in pain and we couldn't be selfish and keep her with us. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I am always on the look out for low cost or no cost things for single moms to do with their kids. As a single mothers we don't always have a lot of money to spend on taking trips or vacations. So during the summer we have to get creative at times to give our kids a fun vacation. I came across an article that SEEMED like a great idea until I dove into it and let's just say their ideas were not that great! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Whether we like it or not, our children are experiencing traumas that we never had to growing up. School shootings, lock down drills, living through a pandemic and being isolated from 'normal' life for a year... it all can take its toll. Not to mention if they have experienced any other kinds of trauma. As their moms, we may not always recognize the signs of trauma in our kids and what we think is bad behavior may in fact be a trauma response. This weeks episode is all about trauma and our kids - and how we can help them through it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I know this topic is one that is VERY charged and one that many people have very strong opinions about. Myself included. Please know that I respect whatever your personal opinion is on the topic just as I would hope you would respect mine. Personally, I am very pro-choice but not only that I am very pro 'your right to choose what is best for you, your life and your family' no matter what that choice is as long as it doesn't infringe on my life. I will fight for your right to practice whatever religion you choose to follow, even though I am not a religious person. I will fight for your right to marry whomever makes you happy, even though I don't believe in marriage. I will fight for your right to choose to NOT have a baby for whatever reason you are choosing, even though I personally don't know if I could make that choice. The point is that we be allowed to HAVE that choice. Todays episode is all about why overturning Roe v. Wade would be a very bad thing and lead to problems that I don't think many have fully thought out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our life consists of a bunch of beliefs and habits. Most of them come from childhood conditioning and experiences. What habits do you have that are getting you closer to the love you desire, the life you desire? Most people break their trust with themselves. Once we promise to do something a bazillion times and don't, subconsciously we have zero faith in our abilities to become more, to have more. We rarely question our thoughts and desires, instead we are simply attached to them. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kaycia Ellingsen is a mom of three, adventurer, course creator and a Best-Selling Author. She currently lives in WI, Kaycia helpswomen gain confidence and embrace the adventure that life has to offer. When she was 19, Kaycia found out that she was unexpectedly pregnant. Kaycia and her boyfriend went from happy college kids to being unexpected parents wading through a sea of unknowns, judgement and advice from peers who did not have kids. She walked through one of the hardest seasons of her life bearing judgement, change, and the insecurities that she held in her heart, searching for who she was. Through the trials and triumphs, Kaycia realized she was stronger than she thought she was. The memoires of being unexpectedly pregnant sparked a fire within her soul and a need to share her story so other women would know, they are not alone! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everyone wants to talk about the Slap Heard 'Round the World, but instead of addressing that I want to talk about a recent article about Viola Davis and what happened when Will Smith asked her this question. Will Smith told her "I will always be that boy who's girlfriend broke up with him"... and she thought no matter her accomplishments, deep down she was a little black third grade girl who got chased home by a group of white boys. This made me stop and think... 'who am I' ... what in my past was that defining moment that influence me so profoundly that it would stick with me years and years later? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

None of us like to think about anything bad happening to us BUT we all know that at some point it will. Too often we aren't ready for that. We don't have things in place to help our loved ones manage all the details of our lives after we pass away OR if we are medically not capable of making decisions. I know it isn't a sexy topic and I know that it seems a bit morbid to think about now but it is so very important. What happens to your kids? How will they be cared for? How will people access funds to take care of your children and their needs? Where are all your important documents? All of these things and more are so very important and we need to have a plan in place, especially as single moms. Today we talk with David Edey who wrote the book on helping executors know all the things they will need to know as well as what YOU need to know to help them. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let's face it, the men have been running things all this time and still haven't seemed to make things much better. In fact there are a lot of things that are getting worse. So I think it is WAY past time for women to hold more seats in power. In fact, I think single moms should run the world. There are so many reasons why I think single moms could run things a whole lot better than the stodgy old men have been. This weeks episode is all about why single moms should run the world. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This weeks episode is all about that feeling of complete exhaustion. I am not talking about your regular tired from working and taking care of the kids ... but that down to your bones, feel it in your soul mental, physical and emotional exhaustion. I used to feel that every day until I realize some of the things that were causing it and how I could eliminate them from my life. Now, I rarely feel that way anymore. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Many people will struggle with codependency in their relationships. Some deal with it in romantic relationships, some with their relationships with their parents and sometimes even with their kids. Codependency can be very toxic and too often women struggle with it more than men do. Let's face it, we've all likely been in a relationship where we experienced it. This episode is all about identifying the signs of codependency, because once you recognize it you can hopefully break the pattern. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We've talked about how important boundaries are for ourselves as parents but what about for our kids? Not the rules and boundaries that we as parents set for our kids but the boundaries that they set for themselves. Are their boundaries any LESS important than ours? What message are we sending them if we don't respect their boundaries? Do you read your daughter's journal? Have you forced your 5 year old to give grandma a kiss, even though they didn't want to? As important as it is for us as parents to model what healthy boundaries can look like, it is JUST as important for them to feel that we respect the boundaries that they set. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TRIGGER WARNING - This episode talks about very sensitive topics I typically try to stay away from REALLY controversial topics but after Texas passed the Heartbeat Bill last week I found I couldn't do that this time. This weeks episode is about why I am so angry about this bill, bodily autonomy and why I believe it is so important that every person be allowed to make a choice. We are not incubators...we are people and we should be allowed to make our own choices. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all know that too often we as moms lose ourselves in our kids and being "mom". Sometimes so much so that once the kids have grown up and moved away we don't know what to do with ourselves. We don't even really know who we are. This weeks podcast is an interview with Jen McGuire, a single mom of 4 adult sons who decided to take a trip to Europe to finally figure out who she was outside of mom. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Quite often when my birthday rolls around I start to think about where I am and who I am. It has started to get worse the last few years though because the kids are getting older too and soon they will all be adults and out of the house. So now I am thinking about who I am outside of being their mom... and I realize that somewhere along the way I lost a lot of myself in being a mom. So when they are gone who will I be then? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We just returned from a 2 week vacation back easy (which is why there weren't any episodes the past 2 weeks) - and during our trip my teenage daughter had some ups and downs. The downs put me in a position where I had to remember not to take things that I couldn't control or do anything about personally. As moms we tend to feel guilty or internalize when our kids are unhappy or angry or sad. Sometimes we feel like its our fault - sometimes it is. However, more often than not it likely doesn't even have anything to do with us and we need to remember not to take those moments personally. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Life changing? Really? YES! There is something that I realized years ago that changed my life for the better. Something that every woman, especially single moms, should discover for themselves if they haven't already. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode I chat with Melissa Salmeron, Certified Master Life coach and mother of three. We dive into setting boundaries and why they are so important for not only you but for your children as well. You will learn the power of an "I" statement and how to effectively set boundaries for yourself. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Recently I saw a video from America's Got Talent where a beautiful girl who is fighting cancer sang a song she wrote herself. The song was beautiful, her performance was beautiful and she got a golden buzzer from Simon. During her interview she revealed that she had only a 2% chance of survival but she was an absolute vision of light and positivity. When asked about it she said something that inspired me and this podcast episode... she said " You can't with until your life isn't hard anymore before you decide to be happy." Happiness can be a choice but often we choose to dwell in the negative. I learned years ago that my life was so much better when I chose to be happy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I remember spending years feeling just blah! Always being irate or on the verge of tears. I let everything get to me - especially my ex. There were days that the stress and unhappiness was so overwhelming that I literally felt it like a weight on me. It took me a while to figure out what was keeping me from my personal zen, my inner peace. But once I figured it out and ways to work through it...things were so much better. I FELT so much better. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The school year has ended for us here in Colorado and it was a doozy! We all had to struggle through how to help our kids through a year of school during a pandemic. As far as I'm concerned if you made it out alive and mostly unscathed you are a winner lady! There are some things that this school year taught me though, and this episode is about a few of those things! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever gotten to the point where you are down to the bone, feel it in your core, to you soul tired? Because you are the one who is doing it all. The one who can't drop the ball. Maybe you feel like you don't have any help or you can't ask for help. I feel like we have all been there at some point. But what happens when that is how you feel ALL THE TIME? When you have reached a breaking point. You have to recognize that isn't how it is supposed to be. Your default setting shouldn't be stressed and unhappy. This weeks episode is all about that feeling and how you can help yourself release some of that burden. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of my listeners recently reached out to me and asked for some advice. Listening to her story I was struck by how similar it was to mine. How I felt at the very beginning of my journey as a single mom and it made me realize how far I had come over these past years. I remember the worry and the emotions that I went through in the beginning. Some of the expectations I had and a LOT of the animosity that I felt. I thought about how many years I spent, wasted really, feeling so angry and upset. I wish I had known then all of the things that I know now. So I thought that maybe some of you other moms out there might be able to benefit from the advice I gave as well. I know that I don't know your story and my advice may not fit your individual scenario BUT some of it might help. I wish I had not wasted so much time being so upset and if I can help even one of you get to a better place faster than I did then it is worth it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let's face it, we all have baggage. The crap that we carry around with us from one experience to the next. Old wounds, hurts, emotional trauma, pain, loss, resentment, fears... it all follows us. Most of us. Unfortunately, whether we like it or not we are probably putting some of that on our children. I recently interviewed Kerri Hummingbird best selling author, Soul Guide and host of the Soul Nectar Show. Her recent book "Love Is Fierce: Healing the Mother Wound" talks about how for thousands of years, mothers have been disempowered, shamed, belittled, and abused. As a result, many mothers have developed victim mentalities which result in their being unable to love fully, neglecting their loved ones, and even competing with their children for control and attention. A woman with the Mother Wound will experience an intense struggle not to pass it on to her children. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I have a confession to make. I kinda suck at co-parenting. At least I did for a really long time. There are many reasons for that: spending 7 years before my daughter was born being the only person making decisions for my boys having serious trust and control issues after my son was almost killed by his own father being a bit stubborn (nah!!) There were many reasons that I struggled with co-parenting with my daughters father and it took a lot of time and work to get better at it. This episode is all about my initial (and some continuing) struggles with co-parenting, how I worked through some of them AND tips to help if you too are struggling with co-parenting. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Recently there was a buzz around a certain celebrity's untouched photo being shared on the internet. She had a very big problem with that image because it was untouched, un-filtered and (in my opinion) real! Now she had her reasons for not liking it and I get that BUT what is that telling the girls out there? That if you don't look perfect you don't look good? And WHO gets to decide what perfect looks like? Why do we as women beat ourselves up because we don't look like models? Or because we don't look like we used to in our 20s? Or BEFORE we had kids? And when we beat ourselves up and say mean things about ourselves what does that teach our daughters (and sons) to do? Developing a healthy body image is so very important especially if you have daughters! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I was talking with a good friend the other night about the power of being single. This friend had spent the majority of her adult life going from one relationship to the other without ever really spending any time being single. She honestly didn't know HOW to be alone. She always had felt like she 'needed' a man in her life. No matter how many times I had begged her to PLEASE stay single for awhile at the end of every one of her relationships she always jumped right back into another one. Until recently. After her last relationship ended very badly she decided to stay single for a while. She told me that she was so much happier now and felt so much better about herself than she ever had. She no longer felt that she needed to have someone in her life in order to be happy. She was feeling stronger and more self confident because she wasn't basing how she felt about herself on how a guy was treating her. She was no longer ignoring red flags from guys that she was talking to and she is being more selective about who she is letting into her life. Now I am not preaching that everyone should always be single. I think everyone should find their person who makes them happy. But your happiness shouldn't be based on that person. They should ADD to your happiness, not be the only source of your happiness. You should be able to be OK being single. But so many of us aren't - why is that? In this podcast episode I talk about the myth and story that we were all sold and how it often contributes to our unhappiness and why I feel there is so much power in being single. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Quite often we set goals for ourselves that we don't meet because we see them as too big. Or we slip up or fall off the wagon and decide that we failed so why even keep trying. I have many different goals that I have set for myself but have struggled at times to feel like I am making any progress toward them. Because I felt I wasn't getting far enough fast enough. Recently I started reading Atomic Habits by James Clear and have realized the power of continuous improvement and how little changes can help me meet my bigger goals. Realizing that small improvements can lead to big changes and lasting results. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Perfectionism and happiness do not go hand in hand. As women we often compare ourselves to others, thinking that another woman has it more together than we do. That mom on Instagram looks so perfect. Her kids and family look so perfect. We beat ourselves up for not reaching some level of perfect that really doesn't exist. People who strive for perfection are rarely happy and this episode discusses why. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I decided that this year, after such an abysmal 2020, that I needed to focus on more than just weight loss. Yes, I still need to lose some weight BUT that wasn't going to be enough to REALLY make me feel good. I realized that there were many layers of things that I needed to focus on instead of just weight loss. My mental health, my physical health, my spiritual wellness (no I did not find religion)... but there are so many different pieces to the puzzle of me and I wasn't working on all of them. So I decided that 2021 was the year I was going to start doing that. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It isn't easy raising children but raising a teenage girl has been especially hard for me. I knew that I would struggle, growing up as a tom boy I never really got the whole "girlie girl" thing...but raising a teenage girl with the added pressure of social media! That has been an even bigger challenge than I had anticipated. These poor girls are presented with more social pressure than I ever was growing up and it is effecting their mental health, self esteem, and so much more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Recently Hasbro announced that they were removing the Mr. from Mr. Potato Head's name and for some reason this upset a bunch of people. This weeks episode is all about why I find this extremely silly but also indicative of a bigger problem - inability to accept progress and change. Also, why I consider Potato Head the first transgender toy I ever had when I really thought about it. Listen to this episode to find out why... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Recently there was a young woman in the news who was arrested and charged with child endangerment. She was a single mom who left her two kids alone in their motel room so she could go to work. As a single mom I know the struggle of trying to find and afford child care. Sometimes we end up having to make decisions that many other people simply can't understand or judge us for. And even though I know that it isn't a good thing that she left her kids alone - I can understand why she may have done it. This weeks episode is all about having to make not so great decisions because we feel like we have no other choice. The struggles that many of us single moms go through trying to do what is right for our families and having to make choices that we don't want to make. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this weeks episode we talk about Valentines Day, stereotypes that single moms often face and why it is so important for you to be the hero of your own story. Too often we are judged by others - made to feel like we are just waiting for someone to come save us. Maybe we sometimes buy into that stereotype. Sometimes we feel like if we don't have someone in our lives we are missing a piece of ourselves. Sometimes we may feel like we have to find someone and we can't be happy if we don't. This couldn't be further from the truth! This episode is all about being whole all on your own - being your own hero. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"When people show you their true colors, don't try to repaint them"... This weeks podcast episode is all about why it is so important to pay attention to red flags instead of ignoring them. So many of us are "fixers", we see someone with problems and we want to help make it better. Instead of seeing the red flags that should make us take a step back we dive in and usually end up losing ourselves along the way. In this episode we cover some of the bigger red flags to watch out for and why it is so important to pay attention to them. Not just in our romantic relationships but in our friendships and even sometimes in our own families. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As single moms we can struggle with our own mental health. Depression and anxiety can creep up on you and can REALLY effect your life. But it is also VERY important to realize that it can also effect our kids. We need to not only be aware of our mental health but the mental health of our kids. Right now our kids are going through an unprecedented time due to COVID restrictions. Having to quarantine, not being able to see friends like they used to, not going to school the way they are used to... it is all a huge shift and change. Many children are struggling to cope with it and it is important as moms to recognize this and be there for our kids. It is also important to know that it is ok to reach out for professional help if you need to. This episode talks about all of this and more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This Thanksgiving will look a lot different for many families because of COVID. Many people are not getting together with their families in order to try and stay safe. Some family members may not be happy about that. This has brought up the topic of setting boundaries for yourself. During the holidays many people have family drama and quite often that can be due to a lack of boundaries. Do you agree to host the entire family even though you don't really want to? Do you have to clean up for hours after they all leave? Would you rather not have all those people at your house this year? Or next? Would you rather take turns hosting? Would you be ok with having everyone over if you didn't have to do ALL the cooking? Setting boundaries for yourself is a good thing. Especially around the holidays. This weeks podcast talks more about why it is OK to set boundaries. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices