Restore Yourself. Restore Your Marriage

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It can be really hard to fix a marriage when you feel broken inside. It can be a challenge to try to meet your spouse's needs when your own are not being met or even fully understood. If you grew up religious or with high moral standards, this can add even more stress to the equation. This is a podcast that talks about the many challenges in marriage, and yes, even intimacy, and how they are effecting you on a personal level. Each week we take a deep dive into what is keeping your foot on the brakes when it comes to your arousal levels and what drives you to step on the accelerator. As your certified Life Coach, we will explore many fascinating topics, such as the different styles of arousal, the many types of intimacy, how blame effects our mood, the reasons we engage in these recreational shenanigans in the first place, and how life coaching skills get us through it all.

Shellie Anderson


    • Dec 2, 2024 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 34m AVG DURATION
    • 217 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Restore Yourself. Restore Your Marriage

    Intimacy and Sex: 3 Common Questions Couples Ask Me

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 2, 2024 31:19


    Have you ever wondered what couples that work with a life coach might ask?  If so, then this episode is for you.  While you might guess some of the obvious ones, these three questions are ones that end up being asked during the journey of a session.These types of questions are not always the red-flag ones that motivate couples to seek the help of a coach, but are often the kind that show up when we start to think about things a little more deeply.Listen in on today's episode to see how these three questions help us discover how to work through marriage problems without destroying intimacy, how to increase trust when times are hard, and what to do when you think intimacy is only on your spouse's time line. 

    Staying Close and Cozy During the Holidays

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 18, 2024 28:30


    Have you ever felt like the stress of the holidays gets in the way of feeling close and connected to your spouse?If so, you are not alone.  The holidays can bring frustration with a higher level of busyness, unmet expectations, and disappointments when things don't go according to how we envision it.  But it doesn't have to be that way.Listen in on today's episode where we discuss a few simple strategies that can really go along way to lower some stress and help the connection stay alive and strong, so you can feel close and connected during the holidays. 

    Recreating the Desire From Your Dating Days

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 5, 2024 29:28


    Have you ever wondered what happened to that fun and exciting desire you felt while you were dating your spouse?  If so, you are not alone.But what if we could harness that sensual energy, desire, and attraction and recreate it in our marriage today?  That would be a fun way to experience our marriage.Listen in as we dive a little deeper into the ways we can recreate this desire in a way that is unique to each couple.  It's a lot easier than you may think.  

    Flirty Excitations

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 22, 2024 31:11


    Do you remember that one song by the Beach Boys called "Good Vibrations?"  In it, there is a line that says "I'm picking up good vibrations, she's giving me excitations."With the concepts of tantra in mind (you can listen to episode #209 for more details), listen in as we discuss the process of 'excitement' compared to being in a state of 'excitation.'  They are not the same thing!  And when you add the intriguing concept of being flirty into the mix, there is something quite magical that takes place.  The way excitement and excitations is approached and experienced is quite different.  Do you know which one is better for heightened female arousal?  If not, listen in! 

    Nice To Meet You, Tantra

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 7, 2024 29:46


    Have you ever wondered what Tantra is?  Maybe you've heard the term "tantric sex" before and your mind went in a million different directions.  But what if tantra is not really what you think it is?Listen in on today's episode to discover some of the key concepts of tantra, which are not the same thing as kinky sex positions only based on hedonistic pleasure.  You just might find yourself pleasantly surprised by a natural desire to incorporate some of them into your intimate experience.

    Positive Practices to Promote Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2024 28:29


    Have you ever wondered if there are certain habits that could help lead to deeper intimacy?  Well, the good news is that there is!Listen in on this episode where you will discover 12 simple practices that you can easily implement into your relationship that will help create a positive foundation for the fun, sexy times to come.Remember, no need to try to implement them all.  Just pick the one that will bring yourself the most personal growth and development, and watch the positive effects ripple out.

    Benefits of Double Dates

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 9, 2024 30:27


    Have you ever felt like going on a double date might be more work than fun?  If so, think again.  The benefits far outweigh the little effort that goes into it.Listen in on today's episode where we share 5 skills to activate to get the most out of double dates.  We will also describe the different types of activities to be mindful of that can enhance your overall experience.  Remember that there is no limit on the amount of fun and unique experiences you can have, as well as friendships you can develop, by going on double dates.  Let's make life more fun!

    Marriage Problem Protocols

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 12, 2024 28:56


    Have you ever wished there was a playbook that had some simple solutions to the problems that married couples face?  Well, today you're in luck because we've put together a podcast with that very goal in mind.Listen in today's episode where we will explore the top struggles of married couples with corresponding proactive protocols that will help you will relieve some of the stress that comes with them.  From differing sex drives to facing health issues, there is at least one protocol that you can start using today.

    The Sexy Spark of a Subtle Aphrodisiac

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 30, 2024 28:11


    Have you ever wondered if there was a way to get a little more "in the mood?"  While most of us have probably heard about the concept of aphrodisiacs and the list of foods that often come with it, this may keep us from looking at some of the more subtle ways to spark arousal.Listen in as we discuss 5 ways that an underestimated and often over looked concept can naturally and easily spark that sexy desire.  Don't make it harder than it has to be.  Make it fun, keep it simple, and feel the sexy.  

    The Cost of Timidity with Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 15, 2024 32:26


    Have you ever felt like there was more that you wanted to communicate about intimacy challenges in your marriage?  If so, you are not alone.  Feeling a little timid about a multi-faceted topic is very natural and normal, but it often comes with a cost.Listen in on today's episode where we dive into the downsides of being timid when it comes to marital intimacy, the benefits of being bold, and 5 ways to embrace that boldness.  Marriage is the perfect arena to learn how to tap into a new level of confidence, get closer to your spouse in a more authentic way, and to embark on the adventure of exploring uncharted ground in your intimate relationship.  

    Intimacy Insanity

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 1, 2024 28:35


    Have you ever felt like the process of trying to improve your marriage, or the intimate aspect of it, drives you to the point of insanity at times?  If so, you are not alone.This usually happens when we spend time trying something out, finding out that it didn't really work, and then spending even more time doing it again, hoping that time will be the thing that will make it work one day.But what if we are just spending time on the wrong thing?  Listen in as we discuss 3 ideas that could help you move from staying stuck in the intimacy insanity loop into a more successful approach.

    Reviving Marital Sex and Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 18, 2024 28:19


    Have you ever felt like your sex life was struggling?  Since intimacy challenges are very common between husband and wife, you are not alone.  But what can we do to revive it?Listen in as we explore a few common mindsets of husband and wife and how they could be having a negative impact on the sexual aspect of your marriage.   Discover how life-coaching ties into the reviving process and 5 easy tips that can help.   Schedule a FREE Discovery Session at www.shellie.andersoncoaching.com.

    Intimacy During Injuries

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 4, 2024 42:38


    Have you ever considered what happens to intimacy when one or both spouses has an injury?   While it may not be a common topic of discussion, it is a challenge that many couples face.Listen in as we discuss some of the traps and pitfalls that couples fall into when they are faced with injuries and three tips that will help you navigate them with  some humor and grace. 

    The Rush of Foreplay

    Play Episode Listen Later May 20, 2024 30:08


    Do you remember your dating years and how awesome it was to make out?  It was such a rush!  The often drawn out experience really allowed for so many emotions and sensations to build up in our bodies.  We often enjoyed it so much that we usually looked forward to next time, and were even craving it.  When we were dating, make out sessions seemed to last much longer than they do once you get married.  When sex is introduced into the relationship, couples seem to just rush to the pleasure part of orgasm.  This leaves behind the magic of making out and leaves foreplay forgotten.  Listen in as we take a closer look at the way in which slowing things down can actually lower sexual inhibitions, increase blood flow, and allow women to feel more flooded with desire for more.  The fabulous effects of foreplay need to be at the forefront of our sexual experiences. FREE Discovery Session at www.shellie.andersoncoaching.com

    Inducing Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later May 13, 2024 29:46


    Book your FREE Discovery Session at www.shellie.andersoncoaching.com today!Have you ever thought of inducing and intimacy in the same sentence?  I hadn't either, until recently, when I heard a song on the radio that really caught my attention.  The male singer talked about birthing lyrics and inducing songs.  Interesting concept coming from a man who cannot physically birth babies.Listen in on today's episode, where we will take some awesome notes from these intriguing lyrics and apply them to intimacy.  These insights can really help a husband and wife when they are operating from very different arousal styles. Learn how the 4 steps of "inducing" labor can totally be applied to "inducing" intimacy!   

    Your Sex Life Is An Illusion

    Play Episode Listen Later May 6, 2024 34:44


    Book a FREE Discovery Session at www.shellie.andersoncoaching.com. Have you ever thought that your sex life is an illusion?  While dating life was fun and spontaneous, married life and the sexual aspect of it seems to be a lot different than what you thought it would be.This is where our lovely expectations come face to face with reality.  Things have changed and shifted, and we may end up feeling like we were being played all along and that we are now just being used.  But sex in marriage doesn't have to feel this way. Listen in on today's episode as we take a closer look at where we are "seeing" things incorrectly, which creates a false illusion, that we then respond to.  Learn three simple tips that help get couples out of the trap of this illusion and to help your vision of intimacy become a reality.  

    Married Sex is a Scam

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 29, 2024 28:01


    Book your FREE Discovery Session at www.shellie.andersoncoaching.comHave you ever thought that married sex turned out to be a scam?  If so, you are not alone.   Husbands feel scammed when the quantity of sex is not as high as they had hoped for.  Wives feel scammed when the quality of sex is not as high as they had hoped for.Both spouses feel scammed for different reasons.  This will leave each spouse attempting to solve the problem with approaches that will meet their own needs, but not both spouse's needs. So, what do we do?  Listen in on today's episode where we discover how a simple shift can help us evolve with the evolution of sex and marriage for today's world.  

    Mandatory Pleasure For Men

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2024 30:08


    Sign up for a FREE Discovery Session at shellie.andersoncoaching.com. Have you ever wondered why men seem to enjoy and want sex so much more than their wife?  While many might assume that its simply because their testosterone levels are higher, it's not the only reason.The arousing shenanigans of procreation actually requires the man to have "pleasure in the process" in order for it to be successful; it's mandatory.  But this is not the same for women. The sweet spot of their most pleasurable nerve endings doesn't automatically line up the same way, and is located in a totally separate place. So, on the one hand, its completely possible that women are having ZERO pleasure during sex while still successful with the reproductive process.  They consistently experience "success without pleasure." But on the other hand, its completely impossible for men to be successful without pleasure!   For them, sex requires pleasure, consistently.   So, what do we do about this?  Listen in on today's episode as we dive into some insightful definitions that shed a little light on what has been missing, then make a decision to start using The Intimacy Trek, and sign up for a FREE Discovery Session with Shellie 

    Less Rhetoric, More Sex

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 15, 2024 62:48


    Book your FREE Discover Session today at www.shellie.andersoncoaching.comHave you ever wondered what approach a husband takes when he is feeling in the mood for sex?  Often, there is no strategic approach at all.  And even more often, the approaches they do try often fall short.Listen in on today's episode where we look closer at a not-so-obvious trap about rhetoric that seems to be at the root of the many faulty approaches and quick fix attempts.  Discover 3 tips for having a better discussion about sex that benefits BOTH the husband and the wife.  

    Total Eclipse of the Intimate Heart

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 8, 2024 29:37


    Have you ever considered that there could be some awesome intimacy insights that could be gained during this unique time of the solar eclipse?  If you haven't, maybe this could be your invitation to do just that.Listen in as we discuss some of the obvious occurrences that happen in nature during an eclipse and how it can relate to intimacy.  During this time of transformation, when the sun is obscured by the moon, can act as a signal for our own internal transformation... as we allow the superficial ways of approaching intimacy to gain the corona (higher way of thinking) approach, with 5 eclipsing ideas.  

    Intimacy's Exciting Easter egg hunt

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 1, 2024 24:53


    Do you want to try something fun with intimacy this week?  Then this is the episode for you.  And while many women end up on the short end of the stick when it comes to how much pleasure they are experiencing with intimacy, there is so much potential that has yet to be discovered.Listen in on today's episode where we explore the ratio of potential pleasure that is possible for couples and how to advocate for it.  With the fun and adventure of searching for Easter eggs as a guide, you can create your own sexy hunt with a brand new challenge hidden inside the eggs.  Spring into this fun and easy activity to improve intimacy this week.

    When Sex and Fun are NOT in the Same Sentence

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 25, 2024 25:11


    Did you know that there are a lot of married women who don't put the words sex and fun in the same sentence?  If you are a married woman reading this, it might seem like common knowledge.  But a married man reading this might be feeling like a freight train just hit him.  He may even wonder, how can sex NOT be fun?In today's episode, we take a closer look at this concept and the meta-message that takes root when a spouse thinks that sex is not fun.   While it may seem like an impossible task to overcome, when one spouse thinks sex is fun and the other doesn't, there is a beautiful opportunity hidden within this opposition.Listen in as we challenge this opposition and use it as an invitation, inviting newness and creativity to the table as well as a movement closer to one another instead of further apart.  Sentences are seeds for our intimate experience... so let's plant some fun sexy seeds!   

    The Fastest Formula to Female Arousal

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2024 20:54


    Have you ever felt like, just when things were going well and headed towards a romantic night of intimacy, things got sabotaged?  I'm guessing it's happened to most of us, even if we didn't mean for it to happen... and the sexiness gets derailed.And sometimes, we can even get off track for days, or even weeks, at a time when this takes place.  But what would happen if the next time, we were able to get back on track much faster?  That would be amazing. Listen in on today's episode where we discuss a faster system to ignite female arousal, the way that advocating and activating it makes a difference, and how knowing this system is valuable for BOTH husband and wife.  Bring it on, and let's get turned on, faster.

    Spicing Up Your Boring Sex Salad

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 12, 2024 21:40


    Have you  ever had some deep introspective thoughts about sex and intimacy while you were eating a salad?  If not, you are not alone.  I hadn't either, until recently.As I looked down at all of the ingredients in my salad, the cucumbers really caught my attention.  Why?  I realized that I normally don't like cucumbers on their own.  I find them boring.  I don't crave them and I'm never upset when I don't have them around.But when they are mixed in with the other ingredients, I absolutely love them!  Listen in on today's episode where we challenge ourselves to add other ingredients into our intimate experience so that it will be more fun, enjoyable and satisfying... and maybe even something we crave.  

    Intimacy Entropy

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 4, 2024 26:34


    Have you ever heard the word entropy before?  Have you ever applied the concept to the intimacy in your marriage?  While most of us probably have a general idea of what entropy is, we may never have thought of it when it comes to sex with our spouse.On today's episode, we dive into this topic just a little bit deeper to see how entropy will take its toll on our relationship if we don't make a decision to do something about it on purpose.  If you have ever thought, "I haven't really done anything different, but things seem to be getting a little worse," then you are probably falling into the cycle of entropy.  Listen in to find out just how easy it can be to get out of the entropy trap and to experience intimacy on a much more enjoyable level.

    5 Fears That Prevent Intimacy Progress

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 26, 2024 33:02


    Have you ever wanted to seek help to improve intimacy, only to be held back by some fears?  This is very common, and is sadly that thing that keeps us stuck and keeps us from feeling closer to our spouse faster.Listen in on today's episode where we dive into the top 5 fears that prevent improvement in the challenging topic of intimacy.  These are the fears that my clients wish they would have addressed sooner... before things got so bad that they were just feeling desperate and even considering divorce.

    Best... Sex... Ever!!!

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 19, 2024 55:44


    Have you ever wondered what contributes to having the best sex ever?  While we might think it comes when we fulfill a checklist of sorts, it might come as a surprise that it can happen under even the most challenging and unexpected circumstances.Listen in as we take a closer look at some of the surprising elements that led to such an experience.  It was not planned in advance and it did not involve any elaborate or large romantic gestures.  But it did come through the process of two adults actually facing some hard challenges in their life.  Don't miss out on what you could be putting into your life to create more opportunities for the best sex ever!

    Vanquishing Valentine's Day Sabotagers

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 12, 2024 31:06


    Do you know what the most researched topic is when it comes to Valentine's Day?  It might not be what you think it is.  With all that is going on in the world today, people seem to be wanting to get back to their roots, and are wondering what love really is.Listen in as we remind ourselves with love really is, the things that might sabotage it during Valentine's Day, and what we can do to feel the love even more.  Don't limit love, but instead, put more into your week on purpose with the following 5 tips!

    The Sultry Sexiness of Stopping to Smell the Roses

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 5, 2024 28:03


    Have you ever felt like you were longing for a little bit more from you intimate experience?  If so, you are not alone.  In a world of instant gratification, it should come as no surprise when we sometimes feel like something is lacking that may require just a little more of our time.Listen in on today's episode where we explore how sexy it is to slow the intimate experience down, include the senses, and involve the brain as well as the body.  Heightening the journey to pleasure can be a total turn on for women and can help to increase the level of fulfillment experienced.

    Sexy Wins for National Spouse's Day

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 29, 2024 26:19


    Did you know that there is a National Spouse's Day?  Don't worry, I didn't know either, until very recently.  But how cool is that?  This is not the same as Valentine's Day.  Since most people don't even know about it, there aren't any expectations to plan elaborate romantic dates or buy expensive gifts.It's just a day to celebrate your spouse.  You can choose to celebrate any amazing aspect about them.  We get to tap into our creativity and celebrate any way we want.Listen in on today's episode as we share some quick and easy ways to include this fun and unique holiday into our lives.  And you never know, adding some fun and spontaneous celebrations might be just the thing that our relationship needs to get the sparks ignited again.     

    Lacking Pleasure, Lacking Desire

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 23, 2024 34:19


    Have you ever wondered why so many wives don't seem to have as strong of a desire for sex as their husband?  While a huge difference in their natural and normal  hormone levels does exist, there is often a different kind of connection that is missing.It's interesting to note that while husbands and wives are pretty much having the same amount of sex with each other, the husbands are experiencing much more pleasure than their wife... leading them to want to have more of it.  Sadly, their wife is having a less than pleasurable experience, leading her to want to have less of it.But it doesn't need to be that way.  Listen in on today's episode where we dive deep into the connection between the pleasure we are having during sex, how it creates the desire for more of it, and how a missing chemical reaction in the brain could easily be at the heart of it all! 

    Ignored or Ignited

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2024 22:44


    Have you ever felt like certain parts of you were being ignored by your spouse while other parts were getting all the attention?  It's fairly common to have thoughts like this from time to time and it can easily lead to us feeling a bit down in the dumps.Listen in as we dive just a little bit deeper into what it actually means to be ignored and what we can do when we feel we need more attention than we're getting.  The options available to us on how we can respond are pretty simple and easy to implement.And to make things even better, we will also take a closer look at what it means to be ignited about something... even certain aspects about ourselves.  Being ignited is a much more fun experience and certainly a much more empowering approach to our relationships.

    Feeling Used

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 8, 2024 24:46


    Have you ever found yourself feeling used by your spouse?   It's not a fun feeling.  For a lot of women, they often feel like they are being used by their husband for sex.  And for many husbands, they feel like they are being used for their money.But what if that is not actually the case?  Sadly, we can easily think these kinds of negative thoughts and make assumptions and interpretations about our spouse that just aren't true.   This just leaves us feeling miserable.Listen in on today's episode where we take a closer look at what the world tells us to do when we are faced with a situation like this, and then we will explore a more effective coach-approach.  Let's go!

    The Fun of a Dream Driven Marriage for 2024

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 2, 2024 25:44


    Have you ever held back your dreaming when it comes to your marriage or intimacy?  Sometimes, we do this is as a way to protect ourselves... hoping to avoid getting hurt, just in case they don't come true.And then sadly, over time, we often stop dreaming all together.  And when we stop dreaming, it can become harder to take positive steps to improve things.  We can then lose the joy that we once experienced in our relationship.Listen in on today's episode where we take a closer look at what it means to dream, what it means to bring the FUN to those dreams, and some simple steps we can take to make the whole process more enjoyable.  Let's dream big for 2024!

    Holiday Mishaps and The 3 Stages of Marriage

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 27, 2023 48:29


    Did you know that there are three stages of marriage?  While many people have heard about the love languages or the seasons of marriage, we may not be as familiar with the stages of marriage.  Not to worry.Listen in on today's episode where we will define and explore these three stages.  There are some simple signs that will help us learn if we are feeling stuck in one of the stages and are operating from a place of resentment and resignation.Learn the signs and what to do when you feel stuck.  Marriage can be better than it is right now, and a coach-approach can make all the difference.  

    Pumped, Primed, and Ready For Action

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2023 25:46


    Have you ever felt like something was missing from your intimate experience?  If so, you are not alone.  This happens to most couples from time to time and is totally normal.Listen in on today's episode where we take a closer look at the reproductive systems of men and women, where they line up (or should we say where they don't line up), and why its easier for men the be pumped and primed and ready for action.Discover why things are bit more challenging for women when it comes to arousal and learn what to focus on so that the female pleasure system can get fair representation in the experience.  This small but significant shift make a huge difference!

    Where to Start with Intimacy Issues

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2023 24:40


    Have you ever felt overwhelmed or weighed down by the challenges you are facing with intimacy?  Maybe, as you start to think about the lack of interest in sex or the lack of initiating it, you realize that it leads to thinking about how unfair things seem to be, which leads to thinking about another negative aspect of the intimate experience.  And before long, it all seems too big and too complicated to solve.If you have ever felt this way, you are not alone.  Its actually quite common and normal.  The challenge we will face when we feel overwhelmed or weighed down is that we will get stuck, almost paralyzed, not knowing where to start making improvements... which usually means that we don't start at all.But today is the day that all of that changes!  Listen in on today's episode where we discuss how easy it is to start and where to start.  This momentum can become very powerful.  As you start to feel the relief of knowing where to start, you will be naturally motivated to take the next step needed to improve your intimacy challenges.

    When Intimacy and Priorities Don't Line Up

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 4, 2023 31:20


    Has it ever seemed like you had one set of priorities and your spouse had a different set?  This may manifest itself in the shenanigans that are, or aren't, taking place in the marriage bed arena.  While most of the women I work with don't have a priority to dive deeper into intimacy, that is often the very thing that is needed.  But this will look differently than they think.  It will NOT strictly be from an "increase the frequency" of sex approach, but from from an approach of increasing the frequency of something else entirely.  Listen in as we explore what actually needs to increase in frequency.  And for all of those husbands who secretly wish that all of the sex and intimacy stuff was just "easier" for your wife (and for those wives who wish that for themselves), you will especially want to listen to this episode!  

    Believing Sex Isn't Spiritual

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 27, 2023 27:14


    When was the last time you had a negative thought about your married sex life?  Maybe it was last night.  Or maybe it was this morning.  Maybe you have had negative thoughts about it for quite some time.The thoughts we have about sex impacts our experience of it.  And when we have a negative thought about it that is in conflict with our spiritual beliefs, we will start to experience cognitive dissonance, and even spiritual dissonance.Listen in as we discuss how these negative thoughts might show up, how we address unresolved issues, and 4 simple suggestions that can help you move forward.

    New, Fun, and Sexy Celebrations

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 20, 2023 25:38


    Do couples realize that duty-driven sex doesn't usually activate the pleasure part of the brain?  If this style of sex is mainly what is taking place, it should come as no surprise that there might be little desire to return for more.But what would happen if we took a more fun and playful approach to the experience?  What if we were to have sex that included a funny element to it?  Then couples would laugh and smile together... which are some of the very components that can help a couple feel close and connected.Listen in today's episode where we share 14 funny things things to laugh about and celebrate together as you creatively try to incorporate them into your sex life. These outside-the-box ideas of how to bring some fun and humor into the bedroom can help the brain want to come back for more.  Which one will you choose to celebrate this week?  

    How to Handle Communication Frustration

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 13, 2023 29:23


    Have you ever felt frustrated with the communication in your marriage?  It could easily be that the both of you are really trying to talk about things as mature adults,  and yet for some reason, it just doesn't seem to help as much as you were hoping.Let's be real.  This happens to all of us.  That's because everyone is operating on their own style of communication and under assumptions of what they consider to be "effective."  But that leaves everyone using very different approaches, most of which are actually just assumptions and not really effective techniques at all.Listen in on today's podcast episode where we share a completely new lens in which to view communication.  Learn 2 simple sentences that keep defenses down, promote individual growth, and allow the relationship to expand and move forward.  You can start applying these today and start improving communicating immediately! 

    Ignoring the Sexual Side of Yourself Increases Resentment

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 7, 2023 23:27


    Have you ever considered how ignoring the sexual side of yourself could be effective your marriage?  Whether we realize it or not, continuing to ignore this topic will only make things worse over time, impacting multiple areas of our lives, not just the sexual aspect of our relationship.But what does it mean to ignore it?  Listen in as we take a closer look at what is really happening when we ignore developing our sexual side in a way that it authentic and still aligned with our values and beliefs.  Why miss out on the benefits of doing this even longer?Join us to discover 3 easy steps to help move your forward in healing, mending, and restoring the sexual side of yourself and take on the challenge at the end of the episode! 

    Sex A.D.D.

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 30, 2023 22:02


    Have you ever heard of Sex A.D.D.?  Is that even a real thing?  While it may not be an official entry in the big official Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, many women experience something that is very similar.This can show up in the form of being distracted during sex.  Maybe in the middle of your sexual shenanigans you start thinking about your to-do list, or how cute those holiday pillows were that you saw at Hobby Lobby the other day, or maybe you start thinking about adding a tree house to the backyard.If our brain is the first sex organ, and its checked-out during sex, we can clearly see that this could lead to an unfulfilling sexual experience.  Listen in on today's episode where we describe 4 simple steps to get your brain back on board.

    Complaints About Your Sex Life Are CLUES About Your Sex Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 24, 2023 19:22


    What are your top three complaints about your sex life?  Most of us could probably list them off rather quickly, since its normal and natural to point out the negative aspects of our lives with ease.But what happens when we have the same complaint for 5 years, or 15 years, or even 35 years?  This is a clue.  This is a clue that there is something to solve that we haven't been able to solve for all of this time.  This invites us to initiate an investigation within ourselves, and into what ability we might be missing in order to solve it.Listen in on today's episode to discover some specific ways to look at the clues in your sex life as the exact roadmap you need for things to improve.  You will be asked to take on a specific challenging question during the week to see how you think about your thinking.  Will you accept the challenge?

    7 Sexy Sayings that Impact Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 16, 2023 24:02


    Did you know that there are certain thoughts and sayings that can have an amazing impact on your intimate experience, even if they are not directly about that?This is the power of thoughts work.  Just one new thought can challenge old patterns, change our perspective, and cause us to feel better!  And the amount of effort it takes to  think a new thought is nothing compared to some of the other stuff we do all day, everyday.Listen in on today's episode as we explore these seven simple sayings.  Pay attention to the shift that starts to take place in your mind and then in your body.  Focus on just one throughout the week.  Or, if you're feeling very ambitious, focus on a different one each day of the week.  You got this!

    Resolving the Mystery of Disconnected Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 9, 2023 32:56


    Have you ever found yourself feeling unsatisfied after an intimate experience with your spouse?  If so, you are not alone.  Its actually fairly common.  We might be less than satisfied because we weren't connected to the experience on a deeper level... or on a level deep enough where it actually had significant and personal meaning attached to it.When we are disconnected from intimacy either mentally or emotionally, we will also disconnect from it sensually and sexually.  This creates a boring unconscious experience with little pleasure, if any at all, for the wife. This is where Saintly Sutra comes in!  Listen in as we take a deep dive into the solution for disconnected and unsatisfying sex... Saintly Sutra!  We will talk about the Core Components, The Intimacy Trek, Relaxation Rituals, Meaningful Mantras, products, and the ways Saintly Sutra fills in the gaps. 

    Guardians of Our Intimacy Galaxy

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 2, 2023 26:18


    Have you ever thought about the ways that AI might impact your marriage?  You might have already considered this or perhaps it might not have crossed your mind at all yet just yet.  But Artificial Intelligence is here, moving swiftly, and we will need to consider how we can protect our marriage.While robots that look like our spouse (or our fantasy version) might not be here just yet, we may not realize that an online digital version is easily available.  This onscreen spouse can be a more attractive, more attentive version of the real us and can lead our marriage down a very challenging road.While we sometimes don't realize that more time spent on technology often leads to temporary pleasure but even more loneliness, we need to spend out time and efforts on learning real skills for our relationships instead.  Listen in now to discover a few ideas on how to take a more proactive and preventative approach to keeping our intimate relationship intact.  

    Blue Balls and Blue Pearls

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 25, 2023 28:58


    Have you ever heard the phrase blue balls?  This is a term that many men use when they are feeling sexually frustrated.  But what about blue pearls?  Is this a terms that women use when they are sexually frustrated?  Not really.The interesting thing about this is that there is a term out there to discuss men's sexual frustration, but not really one for women.  Here in lies part of the problem.  When there is only terminology out there to express men's sexual frustration but not women's, we end up with a one-sided conversation, leaving women feeling like something is missing from their sexual experience in yet another way, the way we communicate about it, or should we say the way we don't communicate about it.Well, now is the time for us to make a little change.  We need to be able to look at sexual frustration from both perspectives, both the husband's AND the wife's as well as be able to talk about it from both perspectives.  Listen in on today's podcast to learn that sexual fulfillment is not based on just frequency alone and discover how to take a more inclusive approach.

    Catching Vibes, Catching Sexiness

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 18, 2023 20:29


    Have you ever wished that there was just a little more sexiness being experienced in your marriage?   Sometimes, when we are feeling this way, we reflect back to our dating days and feel nostalgic for them and the attraction we felt during that time.And at other times, we may feel discouraged that things aren't the same as they used to be and we might be worried that we won't be able to get the sexiness back.  Well, the good news is that I am here to help you get the sexiness back and to let you know that it may not be as challenging as you think.Listen in on today's episode as I share how a random experience of frustration with my kids that ended up turning into a sexy vibe with my husband, how it lasted throughout the day, and how it easily led to a fun sexy time later on that evening.  Situations like this can be so simple and easy to duplicate if we are looking for those opportunities.  So listen in and catch the vibe!

    She's Frustrated, He's Frustrated... Sexually

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 11, 2023 34:04


    Have you ever felt like you were sexually frustrated in your marriage?  This is super common and totally normal.   While both husband and wife have some type of understanding that they are wired differently, they often don't understand the specific details of how, and that lack of information is vital.  And lack of correct information leads to lack of sufficient stimulation... especially for the wife.Husbands often feel frustrated when the frequency of intimacy is not what they hoped it would be and their wife's desire for it is much lower than theirs.  Women often feel frustrated because the love-making experience is often a let down, lacking the emotional connection she is longing for and that is prerequisite for proper desire and arousal to be activated. Both spouses are frustrated and they both want the other one to change.Today we will dive into this topic just a little bit deeper.  Listen in on today's episode where we take a closer look at what it means to be frustrated and the surprising word in its definition that helps us understand its origin.  We will also talk about where real change comes from as well as the reality of differing testosterone levels in men and women and what to do about it all.  And don't worry, it's easier than you think.

    Bridging the Gap Between A Husband and Wife's Differing Sexual Experiences

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 5, 2023 26:19


    Have you ever felt yourself comparing your sex life to what you see in the movies?  Husbands may compare it to porn and the women may compare it to rom-com movies.  Both of these paid portrayals of a healthy sex life are short lived and choreographed.  They are not showing real life, where parenting differences show up, exhaustion from work and raising kids comes into play, and the baggage that each spouse brings to the marriage bed plays out.  What is actually needed is a way to bridge the gap of differences in a way that is real and authentic.Listen in as we discuss what it means to compare, to understand the gap, and how to move towards pleasurable experiences that are far more inclusive, leading to an organic orgasmic experience.  Husbands will benefit from this episode just as much as the wife will when it comes to creating a sexual life that is fulfilling instead of frustrating.

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