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Today on Spooked! Cody and Damien read the internet's most mezmerizing two sentence horror stories! Will our spines be chilled? Will our hearts stop in fear? Will we ever get out of the basement??? Tune in to find out and get ready to get Spooked! Brought to you By: The Sonar Network https://thesonarnetwork.com/
Home invasion victim Bec Musgrave shared her thoughts after a sentence was handed down to a youth who pleaded guilty to the invasion in January. Musgrave told Jason Matthews on 4BC Drive: "There was a pre-sentence statement that he was allowed to provide to the magistrate, where he did express some remorse. But whether that's remorse because it sounds good on paper or it's genuine remorse is yet to be seen."See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Send us a textWe explore the fascinating and frustrating ways people just can't help being people, from politicians who succumb to corruption to everyday encounters with the oblivious and selfish.• The word "people" sometimes functions as a complete sentence, perfectly encapsulating our reaction to selfish or oblivious behavior• Politicians frequently demonstrate how access to power, influence, and money can lead to corrupt decision-making and criminal charges• A golf outing with a drunk young player showcases frustrating disregard for etiquette, even when politely confronted• Our digital photo habits reveal disconnection when we prioritize documenting experiences over living them• Sports fans often cross lines of decency when alcohol and crowd dynamics embolden them to behave poorly• Traffic merge lanes serve as perfect litmus tests for human character and consideration• Self-awareness about our own participation in frustrating behaviors helps us understand the human condition betterIf you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe to Tales from the First Tee wherever you get your podcasts, and share your thoughts with us on social media.Support the showSpotify Apple podcastsAmazon Music all other streaming services
Olympia Democrats’ soft-on-crime policies have resulted in an accused murderer having his sentenced reduced. Seattle has claimed the mantle of the highest DoorDash prices in the country. // Guest: Trump Border Czar Tom Homan on the rise in violence against ICE and other federal agents. // The Yankees broadcast had fun with Cal Raleigh’s ‘Big Dumper’ last night.
In this episode of Exposed Scandalous Files of the Elite, Jim Chapman brings you the story of “The Gulf Coast Stapletons”. A Tik-Tok influencer couple who appeared to have the picture perfect life until recently, when husband Josh Stapleton pleaded guilty to 20 counts of sexual exploitation of children. When wife Brittani Stapleton responded in defense of Josh, the internet broke, and I got all the verified details for you!Follow “Crime Wire Weekly” on it's new channel HERE:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-crime-wire-weekly/id1815864889Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/3zyrgjtW6gLUVbicJaYXV9?si=0dbf4983938344a2Amazon Music https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/3738411d-828e-4138-9976-223ab5de2c87/the-crime-wire-weeklyLegal Note: This Case has not been decided and all persons discussed in this podcast are assumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. The civil charges expressed in this podcast are taken from public record and any commentary discussed are for informational purposes may or may not be the opinion of the host and/or producers of this podcast. The content of this podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by the hosts and guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of any affiliated organizations or institutions. While we strive to provide accurate and up-to-date information, we cannot guarantee the completeness, reliability, or suitability of the information discussed.The podcast does not constitute professional advice, and listeners are encouraged to seek guidance from qualified professionals regarding any specific issues or concerns. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you understand and accept these terms. We are not liable for any actions taken based on the content provided in this podcast.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/exposed-scandalous-files-of-the-elite--6073723/support.
Part 1 Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss Summary"Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation" by Lynne Truss is a witty and engaging exploration of the importance of punctuation in writing. The book emphasizes how proper punctuation can change the meaning of sentences and affect the clarity of communication.Truss uses the amusing title, derived from a joke about a panda that eats bamboo, shoots (the bamboo), and leaves, to illustrate how punctuation marks can drastically alter interpretations. The book is structured into various chapters that focus on different punctuation marks, including periods, commas, apostrophes, quotation marks, and more, providing historical context, grammatical rules, and humorous anecdotes to highlight common mistakes and misuses.Throughout the text, Truss adopts a light-hearted yet serious tone regarding the decline of punctuation standards in contemporary writing, largely due to the rise of digital communication and informal writing styles. She argues for a return to precision and traditional grammar, emphasizing that punctuation is not just a set of arbitrary symbols but a crucial tool for conveying meaning accurately."Eats, Shoots & Leaves" serves as both a guide and a manifesto for punctuation enthusiasts and those who may be less familiar with grammatical rules. Truss's passion for punctuation shines through, making the subject entertaining and accessible to a wide audience, ultimately advocating for careful and thoughtful writing.Part 2 Eats, Shoots & Leaves AuthorLynne Truss is a British author, journalist, and broadcaster best known for her humorous writing on the subject of grammar and punctuation. Her most famous work, Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation, was released in 2003. This book became a bestseller and garnered significant attention for its witty take on the importance of punctuation. Other WorksBeyond Eats, Shoots & Leaves, Lynne Truss has authored several other notable books, including:Talk to the Hand: The Utter Bloody Rudeness of the World Today, or A Cure for Lapses of Civility (2005) A humorous examination of contemporary manners and rudeness.Get Her Off the Pitch: How Sport Can Change Our Lives (2007) A look at gender and sport, examining the position of women in various sports.On the Brighter Side: A Comic Look at Life (2007) A collection of humorous essays on various subjects.Twenty-Odd Years (The Collected Columns) (2009) A compilation of her columns from various publications.The Lynne Truss Treasury (2010) A collection of her best writings.The Grammar Warrior's Handbook (2011) A guide to grammar with a humorous twist.A Sentence of Death (2015) A mystery novel featuring her character Constable Tilly.A Circus of Clouds (2016) A fiction book that presents an engaging tale.Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Comic (2021) Illustrated version of the original work. Best EditionsEats, Shoots & Leaves has seen several editions, including paperback, hardcover, and special illustrated versions. The 10th Anniversary Edition released in 2013 often receives highlights for its updates and reflections on the decade since the original publication. It typically contains additional commentary and reflections on how language use and punctuation have evolved over the years, making it particularly valuable for readers interested in both the humorous aspects and linguistic education.Overall, Truss's combination of humor and insightful commentary on language has solidified her place in contemporary literature, and Eats, Shoots & Leaves remains her most significant contribution to literature.Part 3 Eats, Shoots & Leaves Chapters"Eats, Shoots & Leaves" by Lynne Truss primarily focuses on the importance of punctuation in written language. The...
In this episode I return to rant with poor audio quality and unfiltered thought. Discussing the many revelations of my recent awareness journey and some ways I've found helpful to live with serenity today. Appreciate all who listen.
Lawyer of Evangelist Mama Pat, popularly known as Nana Agradaa, Mr. Richard Asare Baffour, has filed an appeal challenging his client's 15-year jail sentence. He says the appeal is intended to have the case heard again in court
Get ready to be SCARED or maybe just confused tbh. For a limited time only, get 60% off your first order PLUS free shipping when you head to Smalls.com and use code SMOSHMOUTH. Go to https://www.Zocdoc.com/SMOSHMOUTH to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. 0:00 Intro 2:56 Horror movie talk 11:09 Sponsor 12:36 Back to the movie talk 18:10 2 sentence horror subreddit 26:39 Sponsor 27:38 Back to 2 sentence horror SUBSCRIBE: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshCast WEAR OUR JOKES: https://smosh.com WHO YOU SEE Shayne Topp // https://www.instagram.com/shaynetopp/ Amanda Lehan-Canto // https://www.instagram.com/filmingamanda/ Tommy Bowe // https://www.instagram.com/tomeybones/ WHO YOU DON'T SEE (usually) Director: Selina Garcia Editor: Austin Sauer Producer: Amanda Lehan-Canto, Shayne Topp, Selina Garcia Production Designer: Cassie Vance Art Director: Erin Kuschner Assistant Art Director: Josie Bellerby Stage Manager: Alex Aguilar Prop Master: Courtney Chapman Prop Fabricator: Carly Hough Prop Assistant: Bridgette Baron Audio Mixer: Scott Neff Director of Photography: Brennan Iketani Videographer: James Hull Camera Operator: Cameron Dunbar Assistant Director: Jonathan Hyon Executive Vice President of Production: Amanda Barnes Senior Production Manager: Alexcina Figueroa Production Manager: Jonathan Hyon Production Coordinator: Zianne Hoover Operations & Production Coordinator: Oliver Wehlander Production Assistant: Caroline Smith Post Production Manager: Luke Baker DIT/Lead AE: Matt Duran IT: Tim Baker IT & Equipment Coordinator: Lopati Ho Chee Sound Editor: Gareth Hird Director of Design: Brittany Hobbs Senior Motion & Branding Designer: Christie Hauck Graphic Designers: Ness Cardano, Monica Ravitch Senior Manager, Channel & Strategy: Lizzy Jones Channel Operations Coordinator: Audrey Carganilla Director of Social Media: Erica Noboa Social Creative Producer: Peter Ditzler, Tommy Bowe Merchandising Manager: Mallory Myers Social Media Coordinator: Kim Wilborn Social Media Coordinator: Margaux Bernales Brand Partnership Manager: Chloe Mays Operations Manager: Selina Garcia Talent Coordinator: Danielle Moses People Operations Specialist: Katie Fink Front Office Assistant: Sara Faltersack CEO: Alessandra Catanese Executive Producers: Anthony Padilla, Ian Hecox EVP of Programming: Kiana Parker Coordinator Producer of Programming: Marcus Munguia Associate Producer, Special Projects: Rachel Collis Executive Assistant: Katelyn Hempstead OTHER SMOSHES: Smosh: https://smo.sh/Sub2Smosh Smosh Pit: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshPit Smosh Games: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshGames SmoshAlike: https://bit.ly/Sub2SmoshAlike FOLLOW US: TikTok: https://smo.sh/TikTok Instagram: https://instagram.com/smosh Facebook: https://facebook.com/smosh
Following his conviction on two counts of transporting individuals for prostitution, Sean "Diddy" Combs faces a sentencing range influenced by federal guidelines and the specifics of his case. While each count carries a maximum sentence of 10 years, legal experts anticipate a sentence closer to the lower end of the spectrum. Prosecutors have suggested a sentence between 51 to 63 months (approximately 4 to 5 years), considering factors such as the nature of the offenses and Combs's conduct . In contrast, the defense posits that a sentence between 21 to 27 months is more appropriate, emphasizing Combs's lack of prior criminal history and the absence of convictions on more severe charges like racketeering or sex trafficking .The judge holds significant discretion in determining the final sentence, taking into account the pre-sentence investigation report and arguments from both the prosecution and defense. Factors such as time served since Combs's arrest in September 2024 and his conduct during the trial may also influence the decision. While the possibility of a lengthy sentence exists, many legal analysts believe that a sentence exceeding five years is unlikely, given the circumstances and the charges for which Combs was convicted .to contact me:bobbycapucci@protonmail.comsource:Diddy Could Get 20 Year Prison Sentence but Will Likely Get Less - Business Insider
The judge tasked with determining Diddy's prison sentence has indicated he may lean towards the prosecution and enforce a stringent penalty against the music mogul.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Following his conviction on two counts of transporting individuals for prostitution, Sean "Diddy" Combs faces a sentencing range influenced by federal guidelines and the specifics of his case. While each count carries a maximum sentence of 10 years, legal experts anticipate a sentence closer to the lower end of the spectrum. Prosecutors have suggested a sentence between 51 to 63 months (approximately 4 to 5 years), considering factors such as the nature of the offenses and Combs's conduct . In contrast, the defense posits that a sentence between 21 to 27 months is more appropriate, emphasizing Combs's lack of prior criminal history and the absence of convictions on more severe charges like racketeering or sex trafficking .The judge holds significant discretion in determining the final sentence, taking into account the pre-sentence investigation report and arguments from both the prosecution and defense. Factors such as time served since Combs's arrest in September 2024 and his conduct during the trial may also influence the decision. While the possibility of a lengthy sentence exists, many legal analysts believe that a sentence exceeding five years is unlikely, given the circumstances and the charges for which Combs was convicted .to contact me:bobbycapucci@protonmail.comsource:Diddy Could Get 20 Year Prison Sentence but Will Likely Get Less - Business InsiderBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-epstein-chronicles--5003294/support.
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Sermon in a Sentence:"Jesus's priority was always people."Application:Prioritize the mission and make room for MTOC. (hometownchurch.com/mtoc)
Hamamoto on YouTube: / @professorhamamoto Watch Lionel on Diddy verdict: https://youtube.com/live/KR85dKR3Nao Watch part 6 here: https://youtube.com/live/DViShfvP9yE Watch part 5 here: https://youtube.com/live/TaF8EMyS4V4 Watch Prof Hamamoto Part 4 https://youtube.com/live/TkUr4CanA_k Watch Prof Hamamoto Part 3 https://youtube.com/live/qUHdKtabgNo Prof. Darrell Hamamoto, who is an American writer, academic, and specialist in U.S. media and ethnic studies. Professors Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/share/hZajgC... Follow P Diddys latest: • P Diddy #jayz #beyonce #hollywood #countrymusic #nashville #pdiddy #puffdaddy #truecrime #news #youtubenews #podcast #livestream #youtube #thepope #vatican #church Here are Hamamoto's recommended books: Can't Stop Won't Stop: A History of the Hip-Hop Generation ——- The Psychological Covert War on Hip-Hop ——- The Covert War Against Rock: What You Don't Know About The Deaths of; (Jim Morrison, Tupac Shakur, Michael Hutchence, Brian Jones, Jimi Hendrix, Phil Ochs, Bob Marley, Peter Tosh, John Lennon & The Notorious B.I.G) ——- Hit Men: Power Brokers and Fast Money Inside the Music Business ——- Me, the Mob, and the Music: One Helluva Ride Tommy James and the Shondells ——- Godfather of the Music Business: Morris Levy (American Made Music Series) ——- LAbyrinth: A Detective Investigates the Murders of Tupac Shakur and Notorious B.I.G., the Implication of Death Row Records, Suge Knight, and the Origins of the Los Angeles ——- The FBI war on Tupac Shakur: State repression of Black Leaders from the Civil Rights Error to the 1990s (real world) ——- The FBI war on Tupac Shakur and Black Leaders: US Intelligence's: Murderous Targeting of Tupac, MLK, Malcol, Panthers, Hendrix, Marley rappers and Linked Ethic Leftists ——- Have Gun Will Travel: The Spectacular Rise and Violent Fall of Death Row Records ——- The Big Payback: The History of the Business of Hip-Hop ——- Ruthless: A Memoir ——- Hip-Hop Decoded ——- Q: The Autobiography of Quincy Jones ——- How to Wreck a Nice Beach: The Vocoder from WW II to Hip-Hop, The Machine Speaks ——- Dancing with the Devil: How Puff burned the bad boys of Hip-Hop ——- Hiding in Hip-Hop: On the Down Low in the Entertainment industry—from Music to Hollywood
A wedding bus driver impaired by an opioid during a horror crash that killed 10 and injured 25 people has appealed against his 32-year jail sentence; A US judge has denied Sean "Diddy" Combs' request for release from jail ahead of sentencing; A former criminology doctoral student has pleaded guilty to murdering four roommates in an Idaho college town in 2022; Qantas customers are finding out if their personal information was exposed in a cyber attack, as they are warned to be on high alert for scams. The Quicky is the easiest and most enjoyable way to get across the news every day. And it’s delivered straight to your ears in a daily podcast so you can listen whenever you want, wherever you want...at the gym, on the train, in the playground or at night while you're making dinner. Support independent women's media CREDITS Host/Producer: Ailish Delaney Audio Production: Lu HillBecome a Mamamia subscriber: https://www.mamamia.com.au/subscribeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Patricia Asiedua, also known as Evangelist Agradaa and founder of Heaven Way Chapel, has been convicted. Before sentencing, the judge ordered a pregnancy test, and she has been taken to the hospital for the procedure. The conviction relates to a 2022 televised advertisement where she claimed to have the power to double money, a claim that led many people to lose substantial amounts of money.
Look, we all like to think we’re deep, evolved, and spiritually mature beings who value personality over everything. But let’s be honest… we all have that one thing. That one shallow, petty, completely superficial line we just won’t cross. For some, it's a lack of education or bad shoes. For others, it’s that weird way someone chews. Maybe it’s the dreaded "lives with their mom at 35" or the "uses LOL after every sentence" situation.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Welcome to another episode in the “Prison Pulpit” series on the Fight Laugh Feast network’s China Compass podcast! I'm your China travel guide, Missionary Ben, still trying to get settled here in Malaysia. Follow and/or message me on Twitter/X (@chinaadventures) where I post (among other things) daily reminders to pray for China.You can also email me @ bfwesten at gmail dot com. Lastly, to learn more about our ministry endeavors or get one of my missionary biographies, visit PrayGiveGo.us! Why did I begin this weekly Prison Pulpit series? To remind us all to pray for persecuted pastors and believers (such as Pastor Wang Yi) as Hebrews 13:3 teaches us to do (“as bound with them”), by sharing from his own published writings in China, as well as more prison stories and sermons from others like the late Richard Wurmbrand. Today we’re going to deviate a little bit from China and talk about the ongoing persecution of Christians in Iran. Believe it or not, I just got access to my show’s analytics, and I happened to notice that we have a handful of downloads from Iran of all places. If you’re out there, please know that we are praying for you! And I hope that many more will be praying for you after today’s episode! BTW, I’ve always been fascinated with Iran and I’m excited to know that the church is growing there! If there wasn’t an extremely high risk of getting arrested, I would love to visit personally. (I almost got a Peruvian passport for that very reason.) But the closest I have come is flying over the heart of the country (at least once) on a Europe to Asia flight, swimming in the Persian Gulf (across from Iran) with my son in 2009, and flying along the Iranian border with Iraq on a flight from Oman to London in May. Over 300 Prosecuted in Tehran, Nearly 100 Sentenced to Long Prison Terms for Practicing Faith https://iranhumanrights.org/2025/04/imprisonment-of-christians-jumps-six-fold-in-iran-as-persecution-intensifies/ Harsh punishments meted out to two Iranian believers who have already escaped the country https://www.opendoorsuk.org/news/latest-news/iran-christians-exile/ New Attacks in Nigeria Leave 200+ Dead https://www.opendoorsus.org/en-US/stories/new-attacks-in-nigeria-leave-200-dead/ Follow China Compass Follow or subscribe to China Compass on whichever platform you use. You can also send any questions or comments on X: @chinaadventures or via email (bfwesten at gmail dot com). Hebrews 13:3!
Welcome to another episode in the “Prison Pulpit” series on the Fight Laugh Feast network’s China Compass podcast! I'm your China travel guide, Missionary Ben, still trying to get settled here in Malaysia. Follow and/or message me on Twitter/X (@chinaadventures) where I post (among other things) daily reminders to pray for China.You can also email me @ bfwesten at gmail dot com. Lastly, to learn more about our ministry endeavors or get one of my missionary biographies, visit PrayGiveGo.us! Why did I begin this weekly Prison Pulpit series? To remind us all to pray for persecuted pastors and believers (such as Pastor Wang Yi) as Hebrews 13:3 teaches us to do (“as bound with them”), by sharing from his own published writings in China, as well as more prison stories and sermons from others like the late Richard Wurmbrand. Today we’re going to deviate a little bit from China and talk about the ongoing persecution of Christians in Iran. Believe it or not, I just got access to my show’s analytics, and I happened to notice that we have a handful of downloads from Iran of all places. If you’re out there, please know that we are praying for you! And I hope that many more will be praying for you after today’s episode! BTW, I’ve always been fascinated with Iran and I’m excited to know that the church is growing there! If there wasn’t an extremely high risk of getting arrested, I would love to visit personally. (I almost got a Peruvian passport for that very reason.) But the closest I have come is flying over the heart of the country (at least once) on a Europe to Asia flight, swimming in the Persian Gulf (across from Iran) with my son in 2009, and flying along the Iranian border with Iraq on a flight from Oman to London in May. Over 300 Prosecuted in Tehran, Nearly 100 Sentenced to Long Prison Terms for Practicing Faith https://iranhumanrights.org/2025/04/imprisonment-of-christians-jumps-six-fold-in-iran-as-persecution-intensifies/ Harsh punishments meted out to two Iranian believers who have already escaped the country https://www.opendoorsuk.org/news/latest-news/iran-christians-exile/ New Attacks in Nigeria Leave 200+ Dead https://www.opendoorsus.org/en-US/stories/new-attacks-in-nigeria-leave-200-dead/ Follow China Compass Follow or subscribe to China Compass on whichever platform you use. You can also send any questions or comments on X: @chinaadventures or via email (bfwesten at gmail dot com). Hebrews 13:3!
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In this solo episode of 'Don't Cut Your Own Bangs,' Danielle Ireland dives into key lessons from her recent therapy sessions, emphasizing the importance of relationships. She explores how the drive to 'win' an argument often results in everyone losing, the power of genuine apologies over hollow ones, and the significance of understanding rather than feigned confusion. Danielle also shares personal insights and practical steps to navigate relationship conflicts with compassion and kindness, while promoting her journaling tool, 'Treasured,' aimed at deepening personal growth and self-awareness. 00:00 Introduction and Purpose of the Solo Cast 01:47 Lessons from Therapy Sessions: Relationship Edition 03:03 Winning or Losing in Arguments 08:30 The Power of Pausing and Reflecting 14:23 Hollow Apologies and True Acknowledgment 18:02 Understanding and the Desire to Change 23:07 Final Thoughts and Encouragement RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE TO “DON'T CUT YOUR OWN BANGS” Like your favorite recipe or song, the best things in life are shared. When you rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast, your engagement helps me connect with other listeners just like you. Plus, subscriptions just make life easier for everybody. It's one less thing for you to think about and you can easily keep up to date on everything that's new. So, please rate, review, and subscribe today. DANIELLE IRELAND, LCSW I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below. Website: https://danielleireland.com/ The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/ Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured Transcript Winning Isn't Everything: Lessons from Therapy Sessions [00:00:00] Hello. Hello, this is Danielle Ireland and you are listening to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs Today. I am coming at you with a solo cast. These are so fun for me for many reasons. it's like a living, breathing journal where I can process things that are happening in my life or things that I've learned with clients and therapy sessions or just new aha things or whatever's really exciting for me. [00:00:28] I get an opportunity to put those in a place. I have been having some really juicy, juicy therapy sessions with clients over the last couple weeks, and what I've started to do, There are moments when I'm in a session with a client and I'm taking notes or I'm listening to something they're processing or something will fly outta my mouth, just improvised in the moment and I will think to myself, damn. [00:00:52] That was a tasty dish that was really interesting or that was super poignant, or I get like full body chills and I don't really know exactly what to do with the information, but I wanna put it somewhere. And so what has ended up happening over the years is I'll scribble something on a post-it note or I'll scratch something at the top of the client note to try to revisit later. [00:01:15] Sometimes in previous lives I've written them into blog forms or just brought them up with my husband over dinner thinking this. And actually little sneak peek behind the curtain. That is one of the ways, one of the first ways that the title for wrestling a walrus came to me. [00:01:34] It happened in a therapy session. I'm pretty sure I used it just as a way to iterate whatever the client was processing or experiencing in the moment. I wrote it down and it just stuck with me. And there's lots of moments like that. And so what we're gonna talk about today in this solo cast is lessons from sessions, but the ones that are really focused in on relationships. [00:01:58] So this is the lessons from Sessions, relationship edition, solocast, and. The only thing that's ever shared, in this podcast space is the. [00:02:12] Lessons that are gleaned, the takeaways that we can all find value from in the human experience, not personal anecdotes, addresses, names, identifiable characteristics, nothing like that. The point is not to out anybody at all. One that would be terribly unethical and I would lose my license for it. [00:02:32] But also just on a human level that feels ick. That feels really icky. I think that anybody who's curious about therapy or anyone who is in therapy, but wondered what it would be like in someone else's session. There is this innate curiosity of, is anyone else dealing with this too? [00:02:48] Has anyone else ever thought this also, or what do you do when you face this? That is, I think, a healthy, normal, reasonable curiosity I love that there's a place to share that. So yeah, we're gonna talk about relationships. So winning or losing in the context of relationships, particularly in an argument, if the goal is to win or if, if the goal is to not lose. [00:03:15] Depends on what side you're on. Are you righteous or are you just digging your heels in and being stubborn? if you are fighting to win or doggedly. Preventing the feeling of loss. Somebody always loses, win or lose. Somebody always loses in that type of dynamic. [00:03:33] So what happens when we do a fake apology? A hollow apology. And the last is the phrase I hear a lot. I just don't understand. I just don't understand. So we're gonna talk about each of these, how they play out in relationships, what you might be able to find value from within them, where you may be able to see yourself in them. [00:03:55] And I'll also share where I see myself in these too. though I sit in a therapist chair when I'm actually working with clients. I do my own work. I'm human too, and we're figuring this out together. So let's start with. When it's about winning or losing, you always lose. I think what gets lost in most heated exchanges, if we even peel back before the disagreement itself, there is a momentum. [00:04:26] That leads to disagreements, whether a repeated pattern, a repeated behavior or a fight that we keep having over and over and over again. It's never just isolated in that moment in time, there is a momentum that leads to it. [00:04:43] The issue in the kitchen or the fight in the bedroom, or the feverishly upset text exchange, Thing that we are fighting for is to be heard or to feel validated or for the other person to give us something. Usually something in the context of, you are right, I was wrong. [00:05:03] I see it your way. I will change and I will never do that thing that has led us to this moment that makes you uncomfortable ever, ever again. We're looking for some kind of either validation or a guarantee, and some of that makes sense and some of that is. Just not. and it's hard to know in that moment in time when we are flooded with feelings we're escalating and two people have dug their heels in. [00:05:30] It's sometimes hard to see the woods through the trees, but. What I know to be absolutely true, having worked with couples who are actively fighting in front of me, which is not fun. It's probably my least favorite experience working as a therapist. it really activates my nervous system, but also in my own fights and my own disagreements with my husband. [00:05:52] For example, when I am fighting to prove myself right at his expense, the expense of his experience or his point of view. I will lose because I'm either going to say something hurtful to win or I'm not listening, so I'm not receiving any of the information he's sharing. And also, once I'm that flooded and fighting to get my point of view across, I'm no longer in the environment, and I'm no longer sitting in front of my husband. [00:06:21] I'm sitting across an enemy and I'm a battle. And once that happens, once that mode is activated. That's when our worst qualities, our most destructive behaviors, can rise to the surface, and that erodes trust. it creates the opposite of really looking for, we're looking to be heard, one of the things that can be helpful is to even just catch that you're in it. am I trying to win or am I trying to understand something new? Am I trying to win or am I seeking to be heard? Am I trying to win? Meaning I need to be right. [00:07:04] And because in order for me to be right, they have to be wrong. Now, there are of course times where there maybe is a clear cut right and wrong, but what I'm speaking about in this context is not physical altercations or the extremes that are a little more clearly discerned. It's those. Muddy, messy, icky moments with someone that you actually care about or somebody who has a relationship that's important to you. [00:07:33] 'cause maybe it's not always a spouse or a romantic partner. it could be a friend or could be a family member. It could even be a coworker, but they're not a villain. They're not evil. But that is also sometimes a trick that our mind will play on us when we are fighting so hard to win, is we'll make the other person an enemy and we'll convince ourselves a story about them [00:07:53] Whatever our mode of operating makes sense to us, but what you can do is if you catch yourself in that place, you're like, oh, the warrior, the Warrior's armors on, and I am trying to win. This is, by the way, the hardest thing for me to do. Anytime because whenever there is unease, unrest, discomfort in a relationship, my need to fix or my need to get to a resolution quickly is so strong. [00:08:26] One of the best things you can do is pause the conversation, pause and walk away for a little bit. if like me, you have that hypervigilance that that need for resolution, that need to care take. Or if you are a justice seeking person, you're like, I will fight the good fight. [00:08:46] This is going to be really freaking hard. but I absolutely know. Based on the science, based on what is happening in our brains, what's happening in our nervous system, when we are engaged in an interaction like that, win or lose, you're gonna lose. So the best thing you can do when you catch it, even if it's mid-sentence, is to, and I'll actually do this, I'll do something, I'll do a gesture with my hands. [00:09:13] Like I'll throw up my hands like this, like, woo, I need, I need to stop. Or I'll do a timeout, hand signal. But I'll take a breath. I'll pump the brakes. Literally and metaphorically, I'll pump the brakes on the conversation and I need to pause and take a beat. There's actually a really common thread that I've, clients have told me about and I've actually experienced in my own life. [00:09:38] many times. I'll get off of a heated phone call and I'll hang up, and then a few minutes will go by. something will soften or a new thought will come to me, or I'll have a moment of clarity, or I'll start to feel contrite and maybe a little guilty at something at how I said something or what I said, and I'll actually have a better opportunity to reconnect through sending a text. [00:10:05] Now, I'm not a fan of text fighting or avoiding actual connection through text, but there is this phenomenon of. I have to stop the chain of events. That's un that's gaining momentum that I have. I'm losing control and I'm fighting hard to win. And I press pause and I stop and I breathe and I reflect [00:10:28] And then I'm seeing things in a different way. And then the act of texting. Is not to avoid the deeper connection, but I think there is something to, similar to why I love journaling. I'm thinking about what I'm writing and I'm thinking about what I'm sending. And generally that is either an apology or a more well-formed thought or a clarifying statement or a question that helps reframe. [00:10:56] There is something about step out of the game. If you catch yourself in this like pickleball match of like point, counterpoint, point, counterpoint, point, counterpoint, you're just trying so hard to win. [00:11:08] Step outta the game. So the pause is not abandoning the other person or abandoning the topic altogether, or it's not avoiding it. But I need to get out of this. The rules and the context of this game win or lose. I'm gonna step out. I'm gonna breathe and, you know, you're in a better place to reapproach the conversation when I come back online. [00:11:31] That's the language I use. it's hard to articulate into words 'cause it's a full body experience, The more I am caught in winning or losing or making somebody wrong, my focus becomes really narrow and I only see the examples. I only see the points that prove my perspective. Right? When I step out of the game and I breathe, [00:11:57] I come back to the present moment. from that perspective, I'm able to actually see the context of a broader frame of reference, and that opens up the conversation to better possibilities that are less corrosive and less draining. [00:12:15] So the takeaway from there, if you are fighting to win or lose, you will always lose. There is a better way to do it and my recommendation is to pause, step outta the game, breathe, reframe, and only reenter back into that interaction. When you feel yourself come back online. if you are in a relationship with a partner where you were the one choosing to step away and they. [00:12:40] Have an anxious attachment style or they are maybe more like me in this example where they're like, but they need, they need, they need to resolve. [00:12:47] So letting them know that I'm not walking away from you and I'm not avoiding us coming to. A resolution together, but now is not the time for me and I can't be my best me and do this. So depending on who you are and where you fall in each dynamic, it can be helpful to sometimes tend to that. If you have a partner that is a little bit more anxious attachedIf you've ever wanted to start a journaling practice but didn't know where to start, or if you've been journaling off and on your whole life, but you're like, I wanna take this work deeper, I've got you covered. I've written a journal called Treasured, a Journal for unearthing you. It's broken down into seven key areas of your life, filled with stories, sentence stems, prompts, questions, and exercises. [00:13:28] All rooted in the work that I do with actual clients in my therapy sessions. I have given these examples to clients in sessions as homework, and they come back with insights that allow us to do such incredible work. This is something you can do in the privacy of your own home, whether you're in therapy or not. [00:13:47] It has context, it has guides. And hopefully some safety bumpers to help digging a little deeper feel possible, accessible and safe. You don't have to do this alone. And there's also a guided treasured meditation series that accompanies each section in the journal to help ease you into the processing state. [00:14:06] So my hope is to help guide you into feeling more secure with the most important relationship in your life, the one between you and you. Hop on over to the show notes and grab your copy today. And now back to the episode. [00:14:19] When I am, sorry. Falls flat. Ooh, there is nothing. Well, okay, maybe there are other things. It really bothers me when there is a hollow, like a chocolate Easter bunny empty on the inside. I'm sorry. There are so many ways that repair is done wrong, and I think a lot of what though, these fake or hollow apologies feel rooted in. [00:14:49] It's an apology in sheep's clothing. we want a guarantee. If I just knew the right words, if I just knew the script, if I just said the right thing, then I could hijack all of the awkward, uncomfortable, vulnerable conversations that I don't wanna have. I don't actually have to feel any of the sticky, icky, uncomfortable feelings that. [00:15:10] Are involved in making amends, taking responsibility, because once I know something, I can't unknow it. And if I know something and I can't unknow it, then I might need to change. And change is uncomfortable and change is hard. if I just repeat the script, then I can just skip all that crap and get right to the fun part, which is, you know, avoiding discomfort altogether. [00:15:33] I'm sorry, but, or there's a good rule of thumb that whatever comes after, but is what you really mean. So if you find yourself either hearing or saying, I'm sorry, but blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm gonna tell you the, I'm sorry you just said was total bullshit and what you actually think and feel and what you mean is what comes after. [00:15:56] But there are so many ways that we say the words, but we don't mean the words. And so sometimes what I recommend to couples is to just swipe it from your vocabulary altogether. Because a lot of the time what we're looking for in place of an apology of atonement is acknowledgement. I see the impact my behavior had on you. [00:16:24] I see the effect that the way that I said what I just said, I can hear it now through your ears because you just shared. Your history, that experience you had when you were young, or you told me about the type of day you just had. I can now hear how that joke I thought was a joke or that comment that kind of came out sideways, or the fact that I'm frustrated and impatient I can now hear in a new way. [00:16:52] I have a new frame of reference. I have a new context because of what you shared, and I really appreciate you telling me that's not an apology, Fuck is that more powerful than so many times where we say, oh, I'm sorry, because I am sorry. Just, I'm sorry. I thought I was just making a joke. [00:17:11] Be discerning about your apologies. And also I think a really important question to ask that I will share with clients all the time. [00:17:24] Does the situation really call for an apology or is what the other person, or what you asking for is. Clarity and confirmation that your feelings matter. That your experience is real. And most of the time that is what we really are looking for. And that is enough Hollow chocolate bunny Apologies. Can Well, they can, they can get out 'cause I'm over 'em. [00:17:54] and I just don't understand. Oh. I just don't understand the faux helplessness, the performed confusion that a lot of us do. This one I find fun because when we are confused. Then we can't really make a choice. [00:18:19] And if we can't really make a choice because we don't really understand something, then guess what else we don't have to do. We don't have to change. And so a lot of times I will be working with a client who is either in a relationship with someone who is conveniently confused or they themselves. Are maybe not ready to know what they're on the cusp of knowing, or they're not ready to acknowledge what they already know. [00:18:46] There's all these different stages of readiness when it comes to making change, because change is hard and it's scary and it's uncomfortable, but this helpless confusion, I just don't understand. This is my favorite follow up question to that, and I empower you to use it. Just be ready for it though, because you can also use it on yourself. [00:19:10] I just don't understand. Do you want to, do you want to? Oof. I love that so much. Do you wanna understand, so just imagine you're having a conversation with you don't understand. Would you like to, because I'm happy to explain why it matters to me, because this is , the beauty and the really challenging part about emotional awareness . once we become aware. We can't unsee. If I don't know, then I'm gonna just keep doing what I've always done. But if I know I'm now presented with a choice that maybe I didn't have before, but now I have a choice and my choice is to either do the same thing pretending I don't know, or I'm gonna do the same thing, knowing full well and still choosing to do the same thing. [00:20:12] But it's a choice. It's not this helpless foe. I'm just lost and confused. I can't possibly be held accountable. Oh, record scratch. You do know now, and it's a real clarifying moment for an individual or for a relationship or for a job. Once I know what I know, I can't unknow it. [00:20:36] Now I'm being called to do something with this knowing, and sometimes that's a scary leap. The example that's actually coming to mind as I'm sharing this is I knew but wasn't ready to know for six months that I was ready to go out on my own and leave the practice. That helped me develop as a therapist and launch out on my own. [00:20:59] I knew for about six months that. I could afford it, that I was capable, that I had all of the resources I needed to make this happen. But I was scared to take the leap because change is hard. The unknown is uncertain and scary, and it's a new environment and new and scary, and it is just all, all the reasons why we may be avoid doing anything that's new. [00:21:24] But I knew and needed to be confused and then reminded and confused, and reminded and confused and reminded until I couldn't ignore what I knew anymore. And then I acted on it. And I think sometimes too , to wash this all with a, a big dose of compassion. I also think that a lot of times that that. [00:21:47] Knowing, not being ready to know, knowing not being ready to know is its own form of preparation. Like maybe what we see on the outside is procrastination is its own form of preparing. Getting ready to be ready, to be ready to change, [00:22:04] wherever you see yourself or your relationship or someone in your life in this process, I hope. That this has been clarifying. I hope you found some value in it or maybe sparked a fun conversation that we can continue to have. I welcome questions. I want your questions and I would love to be able to answer them for you here. [00:22:23] You can always email me at danielle@danielleireland.com. I am the only person who has access to that email, so I'll be the person that receives it. So hit me up with a follow up question. If you want me to expand on a topic or if you have a new one that you're curious about, let me know. [00:22:38] The thing I wanna leave, whether it's about winning or losing, or whether it's about when Hollow chocolate bunny bullshit apologies or being fake confused about something. If there was a way that we could simplify, well, okay, what do you actually do with this? [00:22:55] The first is breathe. The first will always be breathing. Because the breath is what allows all of the important problem solving parts of our brain that kick offline when we're absolutely flooded with emotion or in terror or thrown back to our 8-year-old emotional selves. Breath brings us back. So breathe. [00:23:19] I love doing this next step. I will think of myself or imagine myself as somewhere between like five and eight years old, but I think of little Danielle. [00:23:29] And then whenever I'm in conflict or mentally struggling with or taking issue with anyone, truly any other person, I will then imagine them as little them. So there's little Danielle and there's little them, and it softens me because one, the reality is we go back to an emotional age wherever, whenever we are flooded with emotion, the experience is exceeding our capacity to meet the moment. [00:24:01] And this is not a judgment, it's just a truth that when we get overwhelmed or flooded or have an adult tantrum or lose our temper emotions are seeping out our eyes, right? Whatever the expression is, the emotion of the moment is exceeding our capacity to meet it. Breath helps us kick back online and then remembering, oh, this is little me not knowing how to meet this moment. [00:24:25] And she's doing the best she can do. And then there's also a little version of this other person. Who is likely having the exact same experience in their own way, and it doesn't excuse behavior and it doesn't excuse mine, especially if I step outside the bounds of what's respectful. But to meet the moment with kindness and truth, doing that with compassion, with respect to what's likely happening inside me and likely happening inside the other, just really adds a nice, soft, cozy touch to the whole context. [00:25:00] Don't worry about a goddamn script. I've spent way too much time with clients, particularly in my early years, trying to craft the right thing to say. And I gotta say that those scripts will fail you when you're actually in the moment. Sentence stems can help. And maybe if you need a point of reference to launch into a well-worded email or text, but when you're speaking from the heart, it's gonna be the right thing. [00:25:25] But you won't be able to access that if you're not breathing. Disarm yourself, disarm the other. You're not enemies. You're not fighting. No one is trying to win or lose. And then say what you really feel and mean what you're saying. you'll know that it's the truth when it's also delivered with kindness. [00:25:48] Because what I absolutely believe to be true. A belief being just something you think a lot, and I think this a lot, that the truth can always be delivered with kindness. It doesn't mean it's gonna be comfy, cozy, it doesn't mean it's gonna be easy, and it doesn't mean the other person's going to like it, but it can absolutely is kind. [00:26:07] The truth is kind. So breathe, trust yourself, disarm yourself in the other. And try to do it with as much kindness as you can access. [00:26:20] I wanna hear from you. I wanna know what you think. I want to answer your questions, and I want to grow and get better with you. So before you leave, make sure to check out the show notes, all of the important links for my children's book, wrestling, a Walrus, my journal, treasure, a Journal for unearthing you, my website, all the fun ways you can connect with me. [00:26:40] They are there for you in the show notes. Make sure to check those out and write, review, subscribe to the podcast. Those three things are like the 1, 2, 3 power punch that help this podcast meet other people who can get value from it. The best things in life are shared, so please share and I hope you continue to have a wonderful day. [00:26:59]
Send us a textIn this show, the boys tackle several subjects...Firstly, they discuss whether anonymous posting should continue on social media or should every post have the author's name alongside it, so as to prevent hate speech and trolling etc.Secondly, they discuss whether a fear based environment in the workplace, leads to better productivity and outcomes.Finally, they discuss what is the best form of punishment in a society to ensure lawlessness is curbed and people live in a society low in crime.But what are your thoughts on any of these subjects? Do you agree with Tony or Tayo, or do you have different views?Tune in and listen to the discussion. Please let us have your comments on these subjects.Links used during the show:-https://www.livescience.com/human-body-no-spacesuit-https://oabeans.com/amazon-vs-alibaba-comparison/-https://facilethings.com/blog/en/fear-kills-productivity-https://www.leaderfactor.com/learn/project-aristotle-psychological-safetyAlthough we much prefer effusive praise
Over 20 years ago, I moved from the "I want" sentence strip to the "Look at" one in working with children with Autism. Why? This episode explores the advantages of using a "Look at" sentence strip over an "I want" sentence strip to optimize gains in the development of communication skills in children with autism in both the short and long term. Ready to take action? Don't delay and join me at the intervention drawing board by joining the SIS Membership today at kellyvess.com/sis
AP's Lisa Dwyer reports on the sentencing of Wander Franco.
You'll wonder why you waited so long. “Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work: but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord thy God.” - Exodus 20:8-10 (KJV)
In this episode of The Stellar Teacher Podcast, we're diving into all things writing—with a special guest! Sara is joined by Kori, the head curriculum creator at The Stellar Teacher Company, to talk about how her experiences as both a student and a teacher, along with research, have shaped the writing resources she's helped develop. From classroom strategies to behind-the-scenes insights on how our writing routines and resources came to life, you'll get a candid look at what it takes to build confidence in student writers.This conversation explores why paragraph writing needs to be broken down into manageable, scaffolded steps—and how imitation, modeling, and sentence-level support are essential to helping students grow as writers. Kori shares some “aha” moments she had throughout the curriculum creation, and the powerful mindset shift that writing doesn't need to start at the finish line.Whether you're already using our resources or just starting to think about how to teach paragraph writing more effectively, this episode is packed with insight and encouragement. You'll walk away with a fresh perspective on how to support struggling writers, challenge advanced students, and create routines that help everyone feel like a successful writer.Join us in the Stellar Literacy Collective Membership: stellarteacher.com/join!Sign up for my FREE private podcast, the Confident Writer Systems Series, here!Sign up for my FREE Revision Made Easy email series here!Follow me on Instagram @thestellarteachercompany. To check out all of the resources from this episode, head to the show notes: https://www.stellarteacher.com/episode258.
Welcome back to 'Don't Cut Your Own Bangs!' In this lively and heartfelt episode, Danielle Ireland chats with Ashlyn Thompson from the Parent Empowerment Network. Ashlyn shares her journey from growing her nonprofit organization to the emotional rollercoaster of her daughter's complex medical journey. Get ready to explore how pain can be an unexpected teacher, the magic of community support, and why tapping into creativity can be your secret weapon against anxiety. Filled with laughs, valuable insights, and touching moments, this episode is a treasure trove of wisdom and joy. Tune in and enjoy the ride! 00:00 Introduction and Guest Overview 00:20 Ashlyn Thompson's Journey and Nonprofit Growth 01:10 The Importance of Community and Support 01:37 Embracing Big Feelings and Finding Joy 02:52 Welcoming Ashlyn Back and Discussing Growth 05:44 Navigating Pain and Empowerment 09:51 The Power of Perspective and Decision Making 14:27 Balancing Life and Nonprofit Work 21:21 The Role of Pain as a Teacher 30:48 Finding Comfort in Movement and Nature 33:09 Returning to Basics 33:35 Reflecting on Past Decisions 35:20 The Role of Pain and Fear 38:20 Parent Empowerment Network 44:25 Creativity as a Lifeline 49:21 Embracing Emotions 53:07 Don't Cut Your Own Bangs Moment 01:01:20 Conclusion and Resources Ashlyn Thompson interview links Ashlyn Thompson, a passionate advocate and storyteller, is co-founder of the Parent Empowerment Network, a nonprofit providing emotional and mental health support to parents navigating pediatric medical complexities. She also co-hosts theEmpowered by Hope podcast, which equips parents with practical tools, resources, and a strong sense of community—delivered with a heavy dose of humor and hope to empower them as their child's best advocate. Ashlyn's fire for advocacy was ignited by her daughter Emery, who was born with bladder exstrophy. After Emery nearly died following a major surgery at just seven weeks old, Ashlyn became a fierce voice for patient safety. Unwilling to accept the limitations of domestic medical care, she discovered a surgical option in the U.K. that wasn't available in the U.S. at the time. In early 2023, Emery became the first American to undergo this procedure—and thanks to Ashlyn's relentless advocacy, that surgery is now available in America. When she's not advocating or recording podcasts, Ashlyn moonlights as a budding driveway chalk artist, chaos coordinator for her spirited family, and an avid nature lover. Chocolate is her daily vitamin, ADHD is her superpower, spiders and small talk are her sworn enemies, and she firmly believes laughter and boldness are two of a parent's greatest tools. Parent Empowerment Network: The Parent Empowerment Network exists to support, encourage, and educate parents of children with medical complexities—empowering them with community, knowledge, and confidence to be their child's fiercest advocate. www.ParentEmpowermentNetwork.org Empowered by Hope podcast on all major podcast streaming platforms: https://parentempowermentnetwork.org/podcast/ Social Media: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Parent-Empowerment-Network/100083218456295/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/parentempowermentnetwork/ She is Charlotte book by co-founder, Emily Whiting:https://parentempowermentnetwork.org/she-is-charlotte-book/ DANIELLE IRELAND, LCSW I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below. Website: https://danielleireland.com/ The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/ Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” is about creating a community around, and familiarity with, the messy middle—that uncertain and often chaotic and uncomfortable time in the middle of a process or journey. The messy middle is replete with ambiguity and challenges, but it's also where the hard and rewarding work happens. Transcript [00:00:00] Danielle: Hello. Hello, this is Danielle Ireland and you are watching or listening to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs. I am so excited to be back in the interview seat. We've done some solo cast. It's been a blast. But Ashlyn Thompson is here with me today, and we just wrapped an incredible conversation. Ashlyn came on as a guest to talk about her work with Charlotte's Hope Foundation a couple of years ago. [00:00:26] She was about ready to embark right in the interview we were, she was. Days away from embarking on a trip to the UK for her daughter having a surgery with the only surgeon in the world who performed the specific type of surgery that her daughter needed. Her daughter's made a full recovery. It's a beautiful story we're gonna get into in this episode, but what I'm truly, if you could imagine even beyond that beautiful story, what I'm so excited to introduce to you and to that I was so grateful to witness and learn from. [00:00:53] Is that Ashlyn has grown her nonprofit organization, not no money in organization, but yes, a nonprofit organization that at the time, two years ago when we last checked in with her, was called Charlotte's Hope Foundation. It has grown. It's expanded, and it's evolved, and it's now the Parent Empowerment Network. [00:01:10] She and her co-founder also have a podcast for that same work, and what I love about the work that they do. They create community connection space and resources for parents and families raising children or any provider helping a child navigate medical complexities. And that sounds like such a hard and heavy and challenging topic. [00:01:33] And it is. But what Ashlyn embodies is. The work that I really wanted to bring to this season and this new phase of don't cut your own bangs, which I want big feelings to feel less scary. I want approaching them to feel possible. And then with that in mind, wherever possible, as much as possible, finding lightness, levity, and joy. [00:01:54] However we can do it. And I'm telling you, in this episode we did that. We accomplished that. We talk about important things, we talk about heavy things, and Ashland is vulnerable in a way that is inviting. But also something we can all learn from. And through the specificity of her life experience and what she's learned, there are universal nuggets that we can all find value in. [00:02:17] I know I did, and this was such a beautiful place to share, and we laughed. We had joy, we smiled . I hope that this topic invites you and encourages you to lean in and tune in because there are so many great nuggets of this. Thank you for being here, and I can't wait for you to sit back, relax, and enjoy. [00:02:38] Ashlyn Thompson [00:02:39] Hi. Yes, I know. Big jumps for both of us. I know. I feel like we're, it does feel like a lifetime ago. It I mean, in many ways it is. It's like we're, I mean, I'm still, me and all the key players are still playing. Right. But it does feel like a different life in a way. And I, with that in mind, I just wanna officially welcome you back. [00:02:55] Yes. Welcome. Ashlyn Thompson. Oh, thank. Don't cut your own bangs. I am so excited that you're here for many reasons, but the thing I'm most excited about is I think that. Building something or starting something creates a certain amount of effort and energy. Sustaining something, growing with it, breathing new life into it, that's a different part of a different element of a creative process. [00:03:17] And that's something I think specifically I'm really excited to talk to you about because you're parent Empowerment Network, which has it, it exists to support, encourage and educate parents and caregivers of children with medical complexities. And that was, it already was in existence when we, right, when we recorded the first time. [00:03:34] But it has grown. Grown. I went to a gala, people, she's throwing a gala fundraiser for her for her network. And so, I mean, I wanna hear about all the twists and all the developments of that, but more specifically the context I wanna provide for us and for this conversation. The thing that I'm really excited about, , and why I feel really passionate about bringing this to video. [00:03:57] Is that I want to help make big feelings feel less scary. Yeah. And I want to make, approaching them feel possible. And then with that in mind as much and as often as possible, laugh as much as possible. Amen. And so, right? So like, you are swimming in the trenches with people and even in your own life with people who are holding and making space for heavy things. [00:04:23] Yes. And yet there is a bright smile on your face. There's a twinkle in your eye. You laugh and you smile. And I wanna, and I don't know how to articulate what that is, but I want to, I wanna, that's something I wanna make space for in this conversation too. So it's important and it's big and it's emotional for sure, but also like, let's allow levity too. [00:04:42] Absolutely. I am so excited to be continuing our conversation, and I'm also really happy to know that. The person who's sitting here with you today is very much a different person from two years ago. And I feel like I have gone through multiple versions of myself just in the past two years. And that's one of the things that I truly celebrate about, not just the journey of parent empowerment network, but I think just growing and evolving as a human spirit, experiencing this life is recognizing that I say this phrase to only certain people, but I act, I feel compelled to share it now. [00:05:26] I feel like I have died a thousand times. And greeted so many versions of myself. But every time I rise into that extroversion and realize who I am, I like that person more and more. And. I feel like one of my greatest accomplishments just this past year has been truly settling into a, knowing a deep belief that life is meant to grow through, not go through. [00:05:58] And that change, that pivot of how I see the next big thing that comes up has been such a grounding force for me and has really helped me feel like I'm actually sitting in the driver's seat of my car. I don't know what I'm going to pass as I'm on this highway. In life. And sometimes life yanks me off on an exit I didn't plan. [00:06:23] And those exit ramps are typically the next lesson. But I'm grateful to be at a point where I can now see the next really hard thing emerging and not wanna hit reverse. Wow. Wow. Not that I like it all the time. No, God. But I can appreciate that this isn't out to crush me. This isn't here to take me down like I used to feel. [00:06:53] , Wow. There's a lot to unpack there for. Thank you so much for sharing that, but also not going in reverse. I wanna make a mental note, not going in reverse. The next version of me, I like better, and this is not here to crush me. Right. The, there's something, I got chills. I got full body chills when you, the la with the last thing that you said, because when I'm working with clients, there is this element and this is something. [00:07:18] I promise I'll come back to that original point there. There's an element of the work that I do where, and I'm sure you get this in your own way too, with like hearing stories from families who are holding really hard and heavy things. I think when I meet people for the first time, a common response is, wow, I don't know how you do what you do, or I don't know how you listen to that all day. [00:07:36] Or Oh man, and I think, yes, sure. There, there are certainly days and clients or moments where those stories are making space for people's big, heavy, painful experiences. Right. Is can be a lot at times. Far less anymore. But I think more than anything the va like, I feel so lucky to have the experience a hundred maybe even thousands of times over hurt people's pain. [00:08:03] And I know what pain sounds like. Yes. And there are different types and one thing that I absolutely believe to be true is that our pain is not personal. Our story is personal, right? But pain is not personal. And the events of our life, even things that happen to us, it's, there's it's almost shifting out of a, and I hope I can say this within the context that, that is heard with love. [00:08:27] But shifting out of a victim mentality right into it. Because being victimized or being stricken with grief or holding something hard like that is absolutely real. And also knowing that this is happening to me, but this is not gosh, what are the words I'm trying to find. It, what I'm hearing is you recognize how hard this is. [00:08:51] Whatever that insert blank. I recognize how hard this is, and I'm not going to make this pain so precious that I don't also see it as temporary. Yes, exactly. But there's something, so I think there's something really powerful and there's so much nuance to that because I certainly don't want to, people can be victimized, but the victim mentality is one of, in my professional experience it's one of the more challenging headspace to, for someone to walk out of. [00:09:21] Agree. It's really hard. Exactly. It shrinks your world. So, so much. That's well said. And we experience that very often. We really fo I mean we say all the time, you know, we are non diagnosis specific, non prognosis specific with the families that we work with, and we focus on the parents or the parent role, which could be performed by a sibling, a grandparent, a friend, an adopt, a lot of different people, but. [00:09:51] What we really found early in our journey and what helped us evolve into parent empowerment network was that recognition that, like you pointed out, pain is not it's not customized to your experience. The feeling, the emotional and physical experience relationship with pain is common through all of us, and it actually is a way that we can connect with each other when we recognize that. [00:10:18] When we stop comparing one another's pains. Now, don't get me wrong, if your kid got a bump on the head versus your kid needs a, you know, brain surgery. Right. Those are different. Yes. Very different. Yes. But most of the time we're not dealing with that. And what we have found is that when somebody is in that victim mentality, which is understandable, I think that's a, very important aspect to acknowledge when you're feeling like a victim, why is this happening to me? Or why is this happening to my child? Because I'll be the first to say, it's never okay when your child is hurting or sick or in harm's way or worse. I will never be okay with it. But when we say stuck in a victim mentality, our ability to problem solve goes from about here to here. [00:11:08] Yeah. And then your child is really the one who suffers. And I hate, it's a hard truth. But we have to face that truth because when we can help a parent start to find glimmers of hope, start to see that there's a way to build on quality of life rather than cure. Then you start to see this new version emerge where they are truly, you know, empowered advocates for their child. [00:11:45] There's something that I heard in what you said too, that a lot of times when I'm working with clients who are maybe knee deep in anxiety or depression, for example. I think why can be a powerful question, but I think a misplaced why is a really exactly damaging question. Like, why me? Why them? [00:12:02] Why this, why now? Because those are questions you can't answer that only lead to a defeating answer. Exactly. And usually another question or shame, but what I'm hearing a lot in when you. When you can kind of broaden your focus and sort of release that constriction from why you then can open yourself up to a different type of question. [00:12:23] How can I, exactly. How can I get through today? How can I get through this moment? What is needed most of me now? What do I need now? Right. And those types of the what and the how. Who do I need to show up for? Is it me? Right. Is it them? Who do I need to ask for help? Who has information that I need? [00:12:43] Those types of questions don't eliminate the pain, but it broadens the scope Yes. Of, of your field of vision. And I know that though, like, 'cause you are here in many ways. Oh, I hope it's okay to use this term. But I hope that you're here as an expert and you're also the executive Hope director of of the power impairment network. [00:13:05] And I think a lot of times. What we would imagine as the worst possible case scenario. Like the worst thing we could imagine would be something happening to our kids. This has been your lived experience. This has been your business partner's lived experience. And for, even though you have a podcast as well, where you really create a space and content and a community that helps people with that very specific set of circumstances, that Right. [00:13:33] I would imagine it's like. The best and worst club to be a part of. So we always say, we're so sorry you're in this club. Yes. But we're so glad you found us. Yes. Like it's the yes, we're really sorry, but at the same time, like, welcome home, welcome. And so I think a lot of the, a lot of the people who tune in to don't cut your own bang, I don't know how many would have this specific life experience. [00:13:57] Right. And if you do, oh my gosh, what a gorgeous resource you have in Ashlyn. Oh, thank you. And the Parent empowerment network and their podcast. But I do think that even in something like this, in within the specificity of everything you're saying, there is such a broad truth that I think we can all access and find value in. [00:14:16] And, yeah. So just thank you for all of that. And I want to, okay. I wanna shift a little bit to the growth of the parent Empowerment network. Right. Because, so when I originally started this podcast, what I was, what I really motivated me, one was I was terrified of becoming a therapist and having worked as a creative, and I just wanted to surround myself with other people who, who were building things, right? So that I could sort of sneak in my own needy questions. Like, how did you do it? How did you figure it out? What happened when you were scared? Like, what happened when your computer crashed? Oh my gosh. And you went from newly building something to, you have really grown. [00:14:53] Yes. You have really grown. And I wanna know having experienced the, you know, the gala that Right. That you that you threw that was so lovely. I wanna know . What led to the growth over the last two years? Because you're still momming, you're still life. Yeah. Your daughter is still being you. [00:15:08] I mean, like your life is still life and Yes. Life is still lifeing. How, in the midst of your lifeing, how have you also continued to grow this? And I really wanna know like what fueled your fire. And just tell me more about that story please. Yes, absolutely. So at the beginning of this, you know, when we started talking, you were very talking about how I'm sitting here smiling and I mean, I am fully, I am genuinely full of joy in this moment. [00:15:35] And I think I know actually that comes from being in something like we have with Parent Empowerment Network, which has been truly its own huge like business, right? We are called a nonprofit, but let me tell you, I mean, it is straight up business. [00:15:57] Is what it is in a lot of ways, and. That's the worst possible name for a tax category. It totally is. Because it's so confusing. Nonprofit doesn't mean no money. Right. Exactly. It's so confusing. We do not exist for free. Is great an idea as that sounds. I want that to be the slogan for every nonprofit. [00:16:16] I just, 'cause we don't exist for free. Right. You know the whole, you get what you pay for. It's, yeah. That's a whole other conversation. We're not gonna spend too much time there today. We should have a part two then. There we go. I'm okay with that. All right. So for that, what I think the biggest lesson that has. [00:16:33] Emerged from this journey just since we were, you know, you and I were talking a couple years ago when we were actually still called Charlotte's Hope Foundation. Yes. Which was our initial name. Yes. Because we had an idea for something that was this big at the beginning. And the name Charlotte's Hope Foundation fit that in theory. [00:16:52] But the thing I'm most proud of my, of Emily Whiting, who's my co-founder, fellow mom, fellow sister, fellow savior, at times the best thing we have done is allowed ourselves permission to grow and shrink as needed. And that's what we've done throughout this journey. It has not been a step process. [00:17:15] There have been countless times where we have grown two or three steps, been bigger, you know, working with international teams of surgeons, pulling together collaborations that have never been done, and then. There have been times where we have pulled back and we haven't released an episode for six weeks. [00:17:33] We have had maybe two or three social posts because our lives were on fire or just demanded all our attention, but it didn't mean we had to stop. I need to, oh my gosh. I don't know how many of you listening or watching can relate to that. I, there is a relationship I have with the expansion and contraction of output where if I'm not putting something out, producing something, making something that it really does a number on my sense of self worth. Right. And self esteem. And that is something that I'm still actively healing and repairing, because I definitely know the facts. I know. The really bumper stickery, self helpy sounding talk. [00:18:26] And I believe it. It's not that I, I don't hear it and think like, yeah. Right. It's just that there's a more practiced version of me, right. That has just had more at bats operating in a certain way. And then life in many ways rewards you for that. In theory. In theory. And I don't mean the like the laurels, like you get the the kudos pat on the back accolades but there is a cost, right? [00:18:47] There is a cost. And I think, in the I this past year I wrote a children's book called Wrestling a Walrus. And this the act of writing this book was something that I didn't realize that in the contraction, or even like in the I love the visual of the caterpillar becoming the butterfly. [00:19:09] 'Cause there's a two week process where the caterpillar is literally, we talk about the messy middle in this podcast and think, thank you Brene Brown, wherever you are for creating language and context for us for this very conversation. 'cause so much of this is inspired by that, but that gooey, mushy middle where it's not a butterfly, it's literally goo and it's Exactly, and it, and, but in that place, there is magic happening there. [00:19:33] Even if it, even though it looks like a pile of shit, right. Like, it's, there's magic happening there. I'll say the impetus or the inspiration, the. It was tough moments with my daughter, moments where I didn't feel like I was doing anything. Right. It like hitting the wrecking ball of, you know, being a parent of a toddler and a parent of an infant like that was, there's not enough grace in any space to help you go through that without serious, you know, support. [00:20:02] There were, I had some victim mentality at that point in time, even, and all things can be true at once. But all of that was what I experienced before I had the idea to write the book. And had I not had that experience, I wouldn't have been able to do that. Exactly. I don't think it would've been the same. [00:20:16] And [00:20:16] , and I promise this whole podcast isn't an ad for the book, but like, I really believe in this damn book and I love it so much. And I love that you talk about that expansion and contraction for yourself. And that you doesn't, it doesn't mean you have to stop. 'cause I think a big reason why I maybe avoided picking up the torch again and doing this podcast like I left it for so long, or I abandoned it for so long, or can I still do it right? [00:20:41] Like all of that stuff. And then yeah it. Yeah. Doubt doesn't mean you're done. No. And taking a pause doesn't mean you're stopping forever. But yeah. I mean, you can't just exhale forever. You can't just output like you eventually have to breathe in. Exactly. And that relationship is very necessary. [00:21:00] And so, I mean, everything you're saying is exactly what I need. Thank you. Thank you. You're welcome. You're welcome. And it, that lesson doesn't come easily. Nope. But I think another element of that, you know, building off of what you were just talking about, pain and discomfort and naturally shying away from it. [00:21:21] I challenge anybody in life to just take a moment to consider pain as a potential teacher, as a professor, rather than pain as an enemy, or pain as a destroyer. Right. If you ask yourself. Why does this feel painful? Because how many times do we all experience in our life something that really gets under our skin, but whether it's a spouse or it's a friend or a coworker and they seem totally unfazed by it, [00:21:56] and that used to be something that bothered me. I was kinda like what's, am I ever sensitive? Or like, what is my thing? And I grew up always hearing, not necessarily even from my parents, but I feel like. Teacher schools and saved by the bell commercials about find what you love in life and you'll never work a day in your life. [00:22:16] And that was great in theory, but I'm a very eclectic person. Yep. I love a lot. And all I was getting was a lot of burnout. That's also like saying like, love your kids and you'll never have a hard day with them in your life. You're like, no bs. No. I love my kids. But like, you know, oh my gosh, kids are the greatest, hardest thing of life. [00:22:33] Right. Right. But I think the same is true. Like , I never stopped loving this. Right. But I don't always have control over the life around. Right. But it's a, I think allowing things to be a part of you, not all of you, is really important. Yeah. And I think it's so easy to define ourselves by that output. [00:22:53] For me and Emily, the word is often it's impact. Are we actually making an impact? And the thing that helped us. Become okay with hitting the pause button when we needed to, and not officially throwing in the towel. Don't get me wrong, there were conversations about it, but we were always very honest with each other and we held each other accountable that if you are feeling like this is not jiving with your life, if it's not jiving with you personally, or it's not good for your family at this moment, let's hit the pause button and talk about it. [00:23:26] But realizing that if we only help each other while working on this, Emily and I, that's helping our kids, that's helping our families. And there's a domino effect from that goes from that. And if that's all we ever do, what's bad about that? You said something that I, it still stuck with me and it will probably be the title of this episode. [00:23:49] Pain is a Professor. Yes, it is. And I wanna go back to that because something that I talk about in my sessions a lot is that your emotions never lie to you. Now your thoughts are very different. Yes. Your thoughts can go a, now granted, we need to think critical thinking is important. [00:24:04] We probably need more critical thinking, but thoughts happen to us all day, every day, constantly. Right. I don't remember what the statistic is. I think we have roughly like eight thoughts a minute, something like that. I'm surprised it's not . Maybe that's just a DH adhd. And that could be too, like, yeah, there, maybe there's a spectrum. [00:24:18] Maybe it's eight to 80 thoughts a minute. Give or take. Give or take a hundred. But so thoughts happen to us now. We can certainly consciously choose what to focus on and what we think. But thinking happens, the emotions are in response to what we're thinking and believing. Exactly. And they never lie. [00:24:35] Right. And I But something you said like pain as a professor. And I like the thought that emotions are energy in motion. Yes. And they always have something for you to learn. There's something for every emotion. There is something it wants you to know. Right. And when you're not feeling good are we have more pain receptors in our body, unfortunately. [00:24:55] We have more pain receptors in our body than we do pleasure receptors. Like, and so when pain is activated, it just has a firmer grip. There's something that Martha Beck talks about that I love. It's called the, I think she calls it the Viper in the box of puppies. So if you were to imagine like, and enough said, right. [00:25:10] Done. You get it. But you hand, if I handed you a box full of like 15 adorable, gorgeous little puppies, I mean, it's, they're the most abundant, silly, loving, fuzzy source of love, safety, pleasure. I could really go for that right now. I mean, would it, that should be a, I'm hoping there's one hiding around somewhere. [00:25:28] We have a surprise for you, but if I were to then put a Viper in or a cobra in your box of puppies. All you're gonna see is the threat. Exactly. All you're gonna see is the threat. And I think in life, it's like we pop mo most of us more often than not, are probably living in lives with a lot of puppies. [00:25:48] But the viper, the threat is what consumes Oh yeah. So much energy and attention and shifting your focus from one to the other is easier said than done. And I wanna talk to you specifically about how you have found meaning or, and I, when I say success, I don't mean it in like a bullet point sense, but right. [00:26:12] Where you have found access to, you know, the viper, you know, or the cobra, you know, the box of puppies. Right. How you access that. I can certainly share how I have, but my emotions, I. I've learned in time. I don't always know exactly what they're telling me in the beginning, but I trust them enough to know that it's something. [00:26:36] And so the first place I try to access, if I'm not dissociating or avoiding, is to sit with it. Yeah. So usually it's like, I'm I'll just dissociate in my fantasy book or rewatching parks and recreation for the MPH teeth bajillion time. You know, it's just always a Sure bet. Yeah. It's just, it's hard for, life can only be so hard with Leslie Nope and little Sebastian, you know? [00:26:57] So anyway. But I wanna know where you find yourself in that shift. Yeah. Yeah. So you've got my head's like turning, I'm also still picturing puppies to be honest. That's okay. So I actually, I feel like I wanna give an example of something that I experienced last year, so two years ago. [00:27:11] It's crazy to think two years ago I went on this crazy journey to England. I went to London to take my daughter, who was not quite two years old yet to have a surgery over there for her ultra rare condition that was not available in the States. And I had talked to everybody in the States, of course, that had any knowledge about it and all they could tell me was, we don't really know anything about it. [00:27:35] We don't do it here. Kind of you're on your own, go for it. Or don't, we can't say that we would support you. All that matters is I went for it. And fortunately it did end up being the right decision, but I also knew that it could not be the right decision. And what I found on that experience was that I was originally desperate for picking the right way in life to move forward, that I could not make a decision. [00:28:06] I could not possibly move forward unless I was a hundred percent sure. But guess what? Life isn't real big on giving you a guarantee. Yeah. Guarantees with anything. And I think where I, that's where I started to learn that I don't have to have the answers to move forward. I can be looking at that box and I can see, oh my gosh, this could go terribly wrong. [00:28:34] But I think living with a hopeful mindset is something that allows me to keep my eye on that viper and then still interact with the puppies over here. My eye is still trained on it, but what I found is a peace in making my decision. And it was a, that feeling, that gut feeling. You know, it, I, it doesn't matter what you've gone through in life. [00:28:58] I can't believe that there's anybody out there who hasn't just had that. I call it just that knowing in your gut, it's a physical experience and that is something. That has helped me move forward in life. Because here's the thing, guys, nobody can ever stay truly still. And that's where a lot of our pain and discomfort comes from, is fighting moving forward without certainty. [00:29:23] Oh, let's pause right there. Oh my gosh. So there's something that Dr. Becky Kennedy who she has the good, she wrote the book Good Inside, and she's got her own beautiful podcast and work and content. She does. She really she focuses on kids, but she's really working on parents relationship with their inner child and by extension their parenting. [00:29:43] But she talks about something called, I've called it the Gap, but she calls it the learning space. So with kids, most of their frustration, tension and meltdowns happen between meeting a moment or. A moment arising and knowing how to meet the moment. And that learning space is usually the gap in knowing or understanding of this is what's arisen and I don't know how to meet this moment. [00:30:04] Right? And then if their context or their ability to meet it, if the moment exceeds their ability that's usually when there's a lot of pain or big feelings. Right. And I think with adults, that's usually where I see self-doubt, rumination anxiety, self-destructive tendencies. [00:30:23] Come in and you're right. You're, I love that you said we're never really still, I mean, one that's just true based on science and physics. We're never still that's actually one of the, like, there's like two necessary components, maybe three to being a living, being or a living entity. [00:30:36] I think, what is it? Movement, cell division, reproduction, and, I don't know, something else. Hey, anyone here pop off in the comments if you're a science boss, please gold star for you. Please. But but yeah, we're never truly still. And so even when you feel stagnant and stuck and even hearing you say that I'm actually processing in real time, one of the things that I have done that I, I discovered by accident, but probably because my body knew better than my mind did. [00:31:04] I would, it often does. I would take my feelings on walks. I would, I talked about that movement is essential if you are literally feeling stuck. I tell, that's what I tell everybody. Anytime they're spiraling. Which it's understandable. Go for a walk. Even if it is five minutes, walk up and down your stairs. [00:31:22] Or at the least one of my favorite things thank you Instagram reels for sucking up so much of my life at times in the hospital, but sometimes, but it's, sometimes it's, it is the perfect escape. It's okay to let the pressure off of ourselves. But there was this one that I saw it was this therapist who was like in her seventies and she was in Ireland and she's walking around in like this, you know, the quintessential Ireland landscape. [00:31:47] And she said, I tell all of my clients when you have a problem or a worry or something that's making you feel like you need to hurry, walk outside where you can see the sky and look up. Because the moment you remove a ceiling from your view, from your your line of sight, your mind opens with it. [00:32:08] And possibilities grow. And I have experienced that so often. And you think about it where you, when you're in a confined space. It only adds to those feelings of I'm stuck or I'm out of options, or I can't deal with this. But when you go outside and the world is just showing you how big it is and how small you are, there's actually a ton of comfort in that. [00:32:35] There's, I've also read and heard that there's something about the way that our eyes sort of gently move and follow and track side to side. Yeah. The movement around us that activates a similar calming sensation that our body experiences in REM sleep. Because if you're tracking a bird or tracking a squirrel, or just simply seeing like the trees and movement, track your kids. [00:32:55] Right. That'll keep you, your eyes all over the place. Girl. But like, 'cause right now we're facing a computer screen and we're in, we're under lights. Like, it's a very I mean, it's a lovely container, but it's a sterile container by comparison of being outside. And I Right. I do think that sometimes, like, like Lifeing. [00:33:11] It can be hard, and I never wanna oversimplify holding the challenges and moving through the challenges. Right. And yet I think sometimes when something feels overly, when something feels complex and impossible, it's almo. I, my instinct is to abandon the basics. And that is always the place to start. [00:33:32] That's always the place to start, is to go back to the basics. [00:33:35] Knowing what you know now what. Do you think the version of you, I wrote down three years ago, but I wanna go back to two years ago bef, like as you were navigating all the travel plans and the decision to go to the UK for your daughter's surgery, what do you think that version of Ashlyn needed to hear or needed to know? [00:33:55] And then the follow up question to that, after you answers, do you think she would've believed you? [00:33:59] It's really funny that you're asking this question because I actually had a conversation yesterday with a neighbor's daughter who is a film student, and this question has actually been going through my mind a lot lately about, I wonder where my life would be if I'd known this in my early thirties, if I'd known, or if I had known this in my twenties. [00:34:23] And I kept kind of going backwards like, I didn't know this then. Oh maybe if I'd known this. And I kept just, like I said, looking back and then what I realized is. It's so important that I didn't know those things because I had to experience them with the challenges. I had to climb the mountains for the first time to really understand the importance of gaining those skills for myself. So I actually think that Ashlyn, a couple years ago, I may have wanted to hear, I, what I wanted to hear was, you're making the right decision. I wanted to be validated by doctors, by people who I typically refer to as the ones who have the alphabet after their name. [00:35:06] Can somebody please just tell me, check, you know, you're making the right choice. Or this is what I would do if it were my child. And I wanted it so desperately that I, it did almost prevent me from going. But I am blessed that because of other experiences before that, right where pain had started to evolve into a guide for my life, a way of understanding what is most important to me. [00:35:37] It clarifies a lot. Exactly. Because often, you know, pain and fear are often about things we can't control, right? And what it showed me was that I don't need guaranteed outcomes to be able to sleep at night. I know that if I don't give it everything, including the kitchen sink, I won't be able to sleep at night. [00:36:03] I won't be able to look at Emery when she's an adult and tell her. We tried absolutely everything we could to give you the best quality of life, and that's what I needed to be able to give her. In order for me to feel good about the mom I am. And that's what was most important to me at that time. [00:36:23] So it sounds like maybe you trust in your ability to meet the moment enough that you don't think you would've gone back and told yourself anything? No, I think, and that's something that, like I said, I'd been thinking about a lot, like how many times if I'd only known this, if I if I'd only held my boundaries or if, or you know, these standards or, you know, all the things I could have done differently. [00:36:48] But as I said at the beginning of this, I feel like I have lived a thousand lives and become. A thousand new versions of myself, but you don't become your next self without going through something that carves away at you to reveal it. We don't grow through the easy no we stay stagnant. And besides small talk, my biggest fear in life is staying stagnant. [00:37:20] God, can we just let go of small talk? Oh my gosh. We all have a weather app and we all know the traffic patterns at this point. Like, do you know what's so funny about the weather app? I'm gonna use it every day. I treat my husband like the weather app, and we have an Alexa, like in, literally, like, I'll ask him what the temperature is and he'll be like. [00:37:41] Alexa. I just, oh my goodness. It's like those basic the basic like things of moving through life. I don't know why. It's like I've, I have this like faux that's of publicist. I'm like, I don't know what I'm, so what's the weather? I can't look out the window. I can't ask my own Alexa. [00:37:56] I always think, I think it's, I think it's more like, I think it's fair to acknowledge those as high. There's higher priorities that take up front of mind space. That's right. That's right. Things' so focused on the big things. Right? Yes. It's okay. We're not meant to like, you know, and I think that's another, that's one point I feel really compelled to bring up in this conversation based on all these things we've talked about, you know? [00:38:20] Yes. thank you for the chance to share what Parent Empowerment Network does, and the Empowered By Hope podcast is about addressing the real hard, the messy like, because as far as we're concerned, like once you get the news, your child is not okay. You're living in the messy middle from there on out. [00:38:36] And it can make you, or it can break you. And we're there to tell everybody, we promise this will make you. Even with worst case scenario, and that's a bold statement, but, you know, but it's one you've lived and I exactly. And I've seen countless others live, right? But I think it's so important that everybody, you know, I guess my dream would be if everybody could just realize we are not meant to carry pain and hardship and struggle by ourselves. [00:39:07] That's really what Parent Empowerment Network does. That's really what our podcast does, is it directly says to everybody who gets a chance to interact with us or who we have the honor to meet with. It just says, Hey, you are not expected to hold this alone. You know, put some of that on our plate. [00:39:24] Let's hold it together because it'll be better for everybody. It's not just you is like, again, that's what frees you from a victim mentality. You are not the only one who's ever experienced this. Right. You are not the only one who has suffered this way. And in by no means it's not to minimize. [00:39:40] Right. Exactly. It's not belittling it, it's not, it's definitely not dismissing it. But it's meant to serve as a lighthouse. Right. Our stories are unique. Yes, of course. And so that's, and I think that's what is endlessly, I will never be bored having an in-depth. Not small talk with the love of God, but like, I will never I will be endlessly fascinated by other people. [00:40:01] Because the stories are unique. Yeah. But there is a common thread that we can all see ourselves in or relate to. That, it's so enriching. Yeah. It's almost like, maybe because it's spring and, but I'm thinking it's like the pain is like the compost. Yeah. Something has to die in rotten decay in order to nurture something new. To grow. Yep. Exactly. And I, and that pain serves as fur. It's fertilizing the new, the next round of growth. Right. Yeah. It's not making anything vanish or destroying it, it's just, but it has to break down to build back up. I think that's why mosaics are my favorite type of art. [00:40:39] Yeah. I have such a strong connection to any piece that I see that's made up of a mosaic. And I remember that coming true for me when my dad had his massive stroke and. You know, he was completely debilitated, couldn't speak for himself, couldn't move his own body. He lived like that almost two years. But I remember getting really close to a couple key therapists in his life. [00:41:04] And I remember just after he passed, I got them both a small gift. It was these little mosaic art pieces for them. And I said, when I saw those, I knew that this was the right thing because you didn't see my dad as a destroyed person. You saw him as for the broken pieces. He was that to be put back, to be put together into something that was new and beautiful on its own. [00:41:33] And that's what I feel like pain has the ability to do for all of us. It's okay. And I to acknowledge that you are broken. But it's also just as important to acknowledge that you can be remade into something. You, the old you is gone. You know, when we go through something awful hard, unimaginable it's really easy to think that I will feel this way forever. There is a finality that we attach to painful experiences and it takes often somebody from the outside to gently help us realize that's not reality. I often, when I'm in that transition and I'm not aware or I'm just not ready to admit there are either, there's usually it's I there's usually things I wanna carry along with me. [00:42:28] Yep. It's like. Like an old dingy snugly blanket or like a stuffed animal that like has like holes worn in and like an eyes popped off. It's just but I when I've gone through those transitions, it's saying goodbye to maybe friendships that aren't serving me. [00:42:42] Yep. Or titles, roles levels of output expectations, stories, ways of being and the way, and to go back to pain as a professor, which is going to be the title. That it's only when I try to take the old way of being or the old relationship that is no longer serving into my new now reality. [00:43:04] When it feels anything other than good. Yeah. That's information exactly that it's showing me something and. That curiosity over constriction can also for me look like curiosity over criticism. And because that criticism is usually either dialed inward, what's wrong with me? Right. Or what's wrong with them? [00:43:25] Versus , what is happening Exactly. What's going on? What is this showing me? And I would say probably saying goodbye to relationships or friendships has probably been the hardest. Yeah. The hard, because there is this idea that I'm like if I like it, and it's like in a possessive way. [00:43:42] It's, if I like you forever. And I, and of course that is true. I mean, it, there's nobody who's been in my life that's added value that I don't appreciate. Right. But but I think that the shedding. Yeah. It's like I, I want the next thing, but I also don't wanna let the old thing go. [00:43:56] Right. And so it's, I think I've spent a lot of time and energy trying to like, pull that thing with me. Whatever it is and whatever that stage. But I think that there's when you can fully embrace, 'cause what I'm hearing from you is when you can fully embrace I am different now. [00:44:11] Yep. This is different. This mosaic. I'm not, I may not be able to carry water like I was as a vase. Right. But I'm gonna look really great as this. Yeah. And the other thing I wanna shift to before, before I get to your, don't cut your own bangs question. What I wanna ask you, you've mentioned art a couple of different times. [00:44:28] And this is to, to reference Dr. Martha Beck again. She has done a lot of incredible work in the last couple years where a way to. Step out of anxiety is not to try to access calm. 'cause we talked about going for a walk, right? So, because as much as I love these big conversations, it can be sometimes like, what is something tangible I can actually hold onto? [00:44:53] So walking with something we talked about community and connection with something else we talked about, but Art, I wanna talk about that for a moment because that is what my book was for me. Yeah. It was I created something that only that felt like it was to serve me. The process of interacting with that idea was so delightful and so delicious and so fun that I was like, I feel like I'm just the luckiest person that like this is, oh wow, I get to play with this thing. [00:45:21] Yeah. And it wants to play with me. And I don't feel that all the time. Like sometimes it's origami or doodling or coloring with my daughter. But to go back to Dr. Martha Beck's work that the opposite of anxiety is not calm, it's creativity. Oh, I love that. And you have by default really spoken through, like just healing through creating. [00:45:43] Oh, absolutely. And also there's something about, 'cause calm, there's something about calm that like, we must be still, and granted I love meditation, but like, I must be still, I must be calm. But when you are holding something that is buzzing and shaking or heavy or hot, like just some emotions are hot, like you, it's like you wanna move it through your hands or your words or your body and make something, right. [00:46:06] And you made me, she made me this bracelet before we started this episode. So like, it feels like you have a relationship with creativity too. A hundred percent. Creativity is a lifeline. And I feel like, and the most chaotic moments of my life have been the least I'm my least creative and I think it's a really. [00:46:29] Valuable, tangible thing for anybody to take from this conversation is if you are feeling out of control, lean into something as simple as I'm obsessed with those adult, you know, like the coloring books. Yes. You know, for adults to have like tons of different like lines all over the place that you have to be like really specific to keep the marker in there. [00:46:51] It can't, I do get a little bugged when it like bleeds over to the next section, but, , it's okay. I know I'm working through my, , my stressors at that moment. But yes, giving yourself a creative outlet, it's like taking a big drink of water after you've been exercising and you are so parched. [00:47:07] And I also agree that , calm sounds great in theory, but for me I feel like the more important, like the word that's become more important or I'm better able to. Absorb is the idea of am I grounded? Are my feet touching the ground? I can still have a lot going on, but when I'm like rising higher, you know, off the ground, 'cause like, I'm like a bird at this point, just flapping my arms so fast, right. [00:47:35] That I'm actually taking flight. I'm not in my best head space, but when I can just take a moment to literally just ground myself, make sure that my feet are, whether it's in the grass or sit down like this. And a conversation with a friend, somebody who really knows you is a great moment for that. [00:47:53] It's a great way to remind you who you are is somebody else. Sometimes I talk all the time about the value of when you can connect with somebody who feels with you, not just for you. Oh my gosh. It makes the world so much lighter and goodness. I mean, huh. That's probably if I could have answered the question I asked you a little bit ago, what's something that you could have if I could have told my former therapist self, like when I very when I first started, you're there to hold space for people to feel and feel with them. [00:48:23] Right. Exactly. You're not there. It's sacred. Yeah. It's there's nothing, one, it's like, there's nothing I can tell someone who's deeply in pain that they're actually gonna No. , That's, the words are just like, right. It's just noise. Yeah. And not to take anything. I'm sure I have clients who have been impacted by words. [00:48:40] But having a safe space to feel your feelings free of judgment. Is one of the reasons why I love journaling so much, but also doing that in communion Yeah. With another human right who expects nothing of you. I love Elizabeth Gilbert has language I love, like there's no precious outcome. [00:48:57] Like I can, that I can sit and have space with you or I can make plans with you or be, and there's no precious outcome. You don't have to perform for me. Right. You don't have to be anything for me. Like we can just be that is what a gift. Yes, that is. I just want to, this conversation has inspired way too many thoughts, but in the best way. [00:49:15] But something that hit me and then I think we could absolutely move on to Yeah. This the cut your bangs question. But what I've realized even in our conversation is that logic is not loud . our emotions are loud and they get louder and louder. The more we. Push them back the more we ignore them. [00:49:36] Think of your kids until they, when they need your attention. Because they deserve your attention. They do. The best thing we can do is acknowledge those emotions and just, even if it's as simple as, it's totally understandable. I feel this way right now. That is such a freeing sentence. Of course, I feel this way right now. [00:49:58] That was some serious shit that I just went through. Yeah . of course, I feel, and it doesn't have to make sense when those feelings hit the timing a lot of times feelings for me, I've found won't hit until I'm in a safe space much further down the road. Yes. And it's like being T-boned, like yes, totally out of the blue. [00:50:19] But that's also what happens to kids when they have tantrums. Ah, yeah. They'll hold. And then when they're finally either home at the end of the day or something, when the container is so full and they're finally in a place where they feel safe, they'll erupt over an orange peel not being peeled correctly. [00:50:32] Or , or a banana not being peeled correctly. Oh gosh. And it's not that, don't even start me on string cheese. God. Oh God. Parenting is fun. The best, but No, but you're right. Sometimes, I think that's probably why I cry almost with like every movie and TV show I watch. [00:50:47] Yeah. Because the emotions are just always right there and I just need a place to let it trickle out. Right. And that's okay. And I think, but just not judging ourselves for feelings. And then I think once we give that space or the feelings, the sooner we can do that, the sooner that logic, you know, like you, you mentioned multiple times, I know this, then you give logic. [00:51:13] The space that it needs to speak to you in a calm and quiet manner that you can actually trust. And that's where I think that those gut feelings truly come from. Those inner knowings are, when you've allowed space for the emotions first, given them their due. So then the logic can start to talk to you because it's never going to yell for your attention. [00:51:35] No. And I think we want it to, but that's not the way it works. And that's okay. A lot of times things make sense in hindsight, oh gosh, hindsight's 2020. Always. South Park has a great episode. If people if you have just like a dark sense of humor and you wanna laugh at, there's a character called Captain Hindsight and it's really funny. [00:51:54] . So yeah, a lot of times things don't make sense until we're. A little bit more removed from them. Yep. And some what I have found to be helpful, I've noticed you using your hands. Yeah. And I find when I am, when my mind is really active and I need it to stop or slow down or I just i'll sometimes even throw my hands up. Yeah. And I'll say, and even saying. I'm feeling something and just to myself in my kitchen. 'cause I'm almost always , because I work from home, I'm either like in my office or in my kitchen, like I'm feeling something. As soon as you did that, it's gonna show on video. [00:52:25] I like saw from the corner of my eye myself, naturally going, whew. Yeah. Just sound like inhale. Exhale. Yes. It's like something is being felt. Something's happening. I don't know what it is, but something's happening. And I think, in a lot of ways too, like that's how we have these internal smoke signals. [00:52:42] Yeah. And it's the same way, like your smoke detector in your house doesn't know the difference between burnt toast and something on fire, right? But it will beep when it senses. Yeah. When it senses something. And so my body is like sensing something. Is this a threat? [00:52:56] Are we safe? Yes, we're safe. Oh, we're likely. We just needed water. We're just dehydrated. Uhhuh. Or we just, yeah. So any number of things. But that was so good. Thank you. And yes, I would love, love, love to know your don't cut your own bang moment. And for anybody who is new to the podcast, 'cause I think there are some new people here. [00:53:15] Thank you for being here. Don't cut Your own bang moment is a moment where you went all in on something like cutting your own bangs, you grabbed some scissors, you watched a YouTube video, you're like, I got this. And you go, and then, oh no, this wasn't what I thought it would be. But the value in a don't Cut Your own Bang moment is not only that we can share in the silliness of humanity and mistakes, but also like maybe we learn something from it. [00:53:42] So, Ashlyn? Yes. I would love to hear your Don't cut your own bang moment. Oh my goodness. I think that there's probably a plethora of them. Oh, of course. And, let's see here. I'm even, I tried to have one prepared, and then I got excited about the rest of our conversation. Oh my gosh. Don't worry. So, okay I'll share one. [00:53:58] So what's a good, don't a good, oh. I invited my husband to record a podcast with me because I thought it would just be, , fun to bring him back on. And what I realized was I didn't prepare him for it at all. I just set up lights and set up a camera and asked him to sit. And he was so, visibly like he was trying, he was sitting, he was trying. [00:54:23] But I could just tell, again, something's happening. And I could tell he was a little uncomfortable and a little stiff. And I kept, because our eyes look out. My first assumption is, what's wrong out there? And I was like, what are you okay? What's wrong? And he he was , I don't really know what I'm supposed to be doing. [00:54:41] And then I was like. Oh, no, it was snip the bangs. I didn't provide any context. I didn't give him any preparation for what we'd be talking about, why we'd be talking like he had no context. And the whole setup is different, uhhuh. And it was such a humbling, settling moment of context. [00:55:04] It's I'm writing something right now about this idea of play. I'm a freedom loving, freedom seeking play hungry, greedy person right now. I want more play. I could never get enough. But what makes play feel fun and safe is to understand the context. Yeah. , There's rules in a game. [00:55:20] Otherwise, what is it? And I, my first instinct is to buck. Rules. I don't like ingredient lists. I don't like recipes. I just wanna feel my way through it. But, if you wanna make a beautiful croissant, you can't just feel your way through that. There's a very exacting way to do it. And so, it, it was such a one, I'm endlessly grateful for him and his patients with me. [00:55:40] I'm grateful that , our dynamics not new, so he probably knew what was going on, but just did yeah he's pretty sweet that way. But I, it was such a refresher that , if I wanna create a space and container to play safely with people Yeah. I need to give them the context. Absolutely. And it doesn't matter how long I've known someone, how well I know someone. [00:55:59] I laughed at myself because I, the part of the reason why it feels funny to me, but in like a humbling way. I thought the problem was him for like the first 15 minutes. I was like, what dude? Relax. I was like, what? Is he doing it right? [00:56:12] Yeah. like come on. And I was like. Oh no. Context. Zero. Oh my goodness. So that was a great one. Thank you. Okay, I'm gonna do mine in like short seconds because this one just hap this that inspired me perfectly. So my 8-year-old son and I are both going to the same therapist right now. [00:56:30] I'm a believer everybody should have at least an annual checkup with a therapist, but that's a great endorsement. Everyone should have an you annual checkup. You welcome, reach out to Danielle, she's fantastic. If you live in Indiana, by all means. If not, we'll help you find someone. Yes. And also order the book. [00:56:44] Yes, order the book. Get resting the wall risk. Get treasured. Yes. But go on please. So anyway one, one of the things that my I, the reason I love the person we're working with is because she's the first therapist I've worked with when it comes to, with my kids, she actually tells me what I can work on rather than just , you're doing the best you can and like you just love 'em. [00:57:03] And like, yes, I know, but that is not helping me. And so one of the things that got pointed out to me. Was so Cole , has very low frustration tolerance, like more so than is necessarily healthy for an 8-year-old. And of course with all the trauma with our his sister, our journey, it's understandable. [00:57:22] So we're working on that. What she kindly pointed out to me was, okay, we could work on his, but do you also realize that your tolerance for acceptable emotions is about this big? Oh, she's , therapist, be therapist Uhhuh. She's , but there's like a whole lot more emo like, she's , it's like a whole rainbow. [00:57:42] We need a whole arc for acceptable emotions. She's so you need to stop making it your responsibility to control which emotions he experiences. And it's up to you to provide the solid ground for him no matter which emotion comes up for him. And I will say that has changed my parenting in the last week. [00:58:04] More than maybe anything has like faster than anything. Because all of a sudden I'm like, of course it's acceptable that his sister just made him extremely mad. Of course it's understandable that he's jealous or sad or excited or whatever the feeling is, but it also doesn't define him as right or wrong, what emotions he's experiencing in that moment. [00:58:28] And the big thing was the realization that every emotion he experiences is not a direct reflection of who I am as a parent. No. Because that was what I needed to let go of that any emotion that is considered negative that my child has doesn't mean. That I'm doing a bad job as a parent. Oh my God. [00:58:49] That is one. What a beautiful. Don't cut. Thank you. With Dr. Sarah. Yes. Thank you, Dr. Sarah. You'd be therapizing all up in that session. That was so good. And it's the, that to me is a great example that hard truths can always be delivered with kindness. Yeah. But I think the big important thing there is you had the right context. [00:59:12] Exactly. You went to her for that information. Right. It wasn't like someone on the street. But the thing that we can't give someone what we don't have. Exactly. And I actually think that what you just said, if there was ever an endorsement for what. Self-care actually is not the commoditized, right. [00:59:29] Faux sense of, I'm gonna create a problem and I'm going to prescribe collagen. Did you know that the reason why, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah is these things that you need to buy and, oh, my program for blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm gonna, I have all that stuff. I'm not I'm wanna, I wanna keep it in perspective. [00:59:45] I am drinking the same Kool-Aid 'cause I'm getting sent the same algorithm ads that we're all getting sent. Like I'm doing colostrum now. I don't even know. Like, I just, because I was like, my gut might grow up I own, but anyway but I think self-care and the best possible context is when you nurture. [01:00:03] And heal yourself. It becomes the medicine. Yes. Yes. And the offering for the other people in your life that you love most. It's like as you increase your own palette of what you're able to allow yourself to experience, you're then also able to see it in your son and give it to him. That is so beautiful and it's hard. [01:00:26] Sometimes, but it's some God that a well timed, articulated loving truth like that can change your life. Yeah. That is amazing. Thank you. I don't know, we can't top that. That was good. We're good. That was real good. Ashlyn Thompson, thank you so much for coming back and we're going to have you back. [01:00:43] You have to come back. Yes. And you're coming over to Empowered by Hope very soon. I would love that so much. And Yes. And so all of the ways, if you or anyone you know in your life has been impacted by a little one with complex me complex medical issues and you want some support, you want some information, you want some resources. [01:01:01] The link in the show notes will have every way that you can connect with Ashlyn, her business partner, and what was formally Charlotte's Hope Foundation, what is now the Parent Empowerment Network. Pick up all the books, all the resources, everything I talked about too for my stuff is also in there. [01:01:16] But , it's all linked for you there. So I hope that you get what you need and. Thanks so much, . Oh my gosh. [01:01:21] If you've ever wanted to pick up journaling,
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Alexis Whilby is the former daughter in-law of Todd and Julie Chrisley from Chrisley Knows Best. She gives her most revealing interview yet - disclosing how she found out Todd was under investigation by the government, his narcissistic abuse that had him suing her until just a year ago, and her thoughts on how Chase and Savannah might be holding up now. MY Go Big Podcasting Courses Are Here! Purchase Go Big Podcasting and learn to start, monetize, and grow your own podcast. Use code DAD15 for 15% OFF until 6/30/2025 **SHOP my Amazon Marketplace - especially if you're looking to get geared-up to start your own Podcast!!!** https://www.amazon.com/shop/thesarahfrasershow Show is sponsored by: Download Cash App & sign up! Use our exclusive referral code TSFS in your profile, send $5 to a friend within 14 days, and you'll get $10 dropped right into your account. Terms apply Horizonfibroids.com get rid of those nasty fibroids Gopurebeauty.com science backed skincare from head to toe, use code TSFS at checkout for 25% OFF your order Nutrafol.com use code TSFS for FREE shipping and $10 off your subscription Quince.com/tsfs for FREE shipping on your order and 365 day returns Rula.com/tsfs to get started today. That's R-U-L-A dot com slash tsfs for convenient therapy that's covered by insurance. SkylightCal.com/tsfs for $30 OFF your 15 inch calendar Thrivecosmetics.com/tsfs Brighten a mom's day—especially if you're that mom. Go to thrivecausemetics.com/TSFS for 20% OFF your order Warbyparker.com/tsfs make an appointment at one of their 270 store locations and head to the website to try on endless pairs of glasses virtually and buy your perfect pair Follow me on Instagram/Tiktok: @thesarahfrasershow ***Visit our Sub-Reddit: reddit.com/r/thesarahfrasershow for ALL things The Sarah Fraser Show!!!*** Advertise on The Sarah Fraser Show: thesarahfrasershow@gmail.com Got a juicy gossip TIP from your favorite TLC or Bravo show? Email: thesarahfrasershow@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Alexis Whilby is the former daughter in-law of Todd and Julie Chrisley from Chrisley Knows Best. She gives her most revealing interview yet - disclosing how she found out Todd was under investigation by the government, his narcissistic abuse that had him suing her until just a year ago, and her thoughts on how Chase and Savannah might be holding up now. MY Go Big Podcasting Courses Are Here! Purchase Go Big Podcasting and learn to start, monetize, and grow your own podcast. Use code DAD15 for 15% OFF until 6/30/2025 **SHOP my Amazon Marketplace - especially if you're looking to get geared-up to start your own Podcast!!!** https://www.amazon.com/shop/thesarahfrasershow Show is sponsored by: Download Cash App & sign up! Use our exclusive referral code TSFS in your profile, send $5 to a friend within 14 days, and you'll get $10 dropped right into your account. Terms apply Horizonfibroids.com get rid of those nasty fibroids Gopurebeauty.com science backed skincare from head to toe, use code TSFS at checkout for 25% OFF your order Nutrafol.com use code TSFS for FREE shipping and $10 off your subscription Quince.com/tsfs for FREE shipping on your order and 365 day returns Rula.com/tsfs to get started today. That's R-U-L-A dot com slash tsfs for convenient therapy that's covered by insurance. SkylightCal.com/tsfs for $30 OFF your 15 inch calendar Thrivecosmetics.com/tsfs Brighten a mom's day—especially if you're that mom. Go to thrivecausemetics.com/TSFS for 20% OFF your order Warbyparker.com/tsfs make an appointment at one of their 270 store locations and head to the website to try on endless pairs of glasses virtually and buy your perfect pair Follow me on Instagram/Tiktok: @thesarahfrasershow ***Visit our Sub-Reddit: reddit.com/r/thesarahfrasershow for ALL things The Sarah Fraser Show!!!*** Advertise on The Sarah Fraser Show: thesarahfrasershow@gmail.com Got a juicy gossip TIP from your favorite TLC or Bravo show? Email: thesarahfrasershow@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
How to Read Body Language & Detect Lies with Dr. Abbie Maroño Ever wonder if you could read people like an FBI agent? In this mind-opening conversation, Dr. Abbie Maroño — world-renowned behavior scientist, trusted advisor to the FBI and Secret Service — joins Jeff Dudan to share the real science behind trust, deception, body language, and reading people. In this episode: ✅ How to spot lies (what really works, what doesn't) ✅ The biggest myths about body language ✅ How trust works — and how to rebuild it ✅ How social media & AI mess with our thinking ✅ The parenting mistake that ruins resilience ✅ How to grow stronger from shame and fear ✅ Real stories from FBI-level behavioral science Dr. Abbie also reveals insights from her best-selling books Work In Progress and The Upper Hand — and how she went from a troubled teen to training elite security units. Find Dr. Abbie on Insta: https://www.instagram.com/doctorabbieofficial/ Dr. Abbie Marono's books: https://www.abbiemarono.com/books If you care about people, leadership, business, or personal growth — this is a masterclass in human behavior you won't want to miss.
Eric Zorn, Publisher of The Picayune Sentinel, joins John Williams to talk about the sentencing of former Illinois Speaker of the House Mike Madigan, his thoughts on Saturday’s ‘No Kings’ protests across the country, why he thinks waving a flag of another country at a protest sends the wrong message, the controversy surrounding Nezza singing the […]
How to Read Body Language & Detect Lies with Dr. Abbie Maroño Ever wonder if you could read people like an FBI agent? In this mind-opening conversation, Dr. Abbie Maroño — world-renowned behavior scientist, trusted advisor to the FBI and Secret Service — joins Jeff Dudan to share the real science behind trust, deception, body language, and reading people. In this episode: ✅ How to spot lies (what really works, what doesn't) ✅ The biggest myths about body language ✅ How trust works — and how to rebuild it ✅ How social media & AI mess with our thinking ✅ The parenting mistake that ruins resilience ✅ How to grow stronger from shame and fear ✅ Real stories from FBI-level behavioral science Dr. Abbie also reveals insights from her best-selling books Work In Progress and The Upper Hand — and how she went from a troubled teen to training elite security units. Find Dr. Abbie on Insta: https://www.instagram.com/doctorabbieofficial/ Dr. Abbie Marono's books: https://www.abbiemarono.com/books If you care about people, leadership, business, or personal growth — this is a masterclass in human behavior you won't want to miss.
Eric Zorn, Publisher of The Picayune Sentinel, joins John Williams to talk about the sentencing of former Illinois Speaker of the House Mike Madigan, his thoughts on Saturday’s ‘No Kings’ protests across the country, why he thinks waving a flag of another country at a protest sends the wrong message, the controversy surrounding Nezza singing the […]
AP correspondent Julie Walker reports former Sen. Bob Menendez arrives at prison to begin serving his bribery sentence.
Eric Zorn, Publisher of The Picayune Sentinel, joins John Williams to talk about the sentencing of former Illinois Speaker of the House Mike Madigan, his thoughts on Saturday’s ‘No Kings’ protests across the country, why he thinks waving a flag of another country at a protest sends the wrong message, the controversy surrounding Nezza singing the […]
I explain in the episode, so no details are needed here, how we decided to look at some of the thoughts Master Kelljchian shared in his book 365 Days of the Warrior. We reviewed the Book back in 2021.Heres a link:https://www.buzzsprout.com/477379/episodes/7049776We're so lucky to have Hanshi Malanoski share some thoughts at the end of this show. Hanshi has been on quite a few times. Here is his first interview:https://www.buzzsprout.com/477379/episodes/9551496I was reminded of quite a few episodes while we recorded this show. Here is our episode on Chi (one of my favorites):https://www.buzzsprout.com/477379/episodes/5159104And finally, we did 2 episodes on Training and Aging. Here is the first one:https://www.buzzsprout.com/477379/episodes/11508081If you want information on old episodes (part 2 of aging?) Write and I'll send it to you. If, you have a moment, click our support the show link below. It is truly noticed and appreciated. Support the showThanks so much for listening and sharing the podcast with friends. Reach us all over the web. Facebook and twitter are simply wildcatdojo. However, insta is wildcatdojo conversations. (There's a story there.)On YouTube (where we are now airing some of our older episodes - complete with a slideshow that I tweak constantly) https://www.youtube.com/@wildcatdojo9869/podcastsAnd for our webpage, where you can also find all the episodes and see some info about the dojo: http://wildcatdojo.com/025-6/podcast.html . And of course, we love it when you support our sponsor Honor Athletics. Here is their link:https://honor-athletics.com/Thank you for listening.
Ray Long, the great investigative reporter at the Chicago Tribune, and author of the book, ‘The House that Madigan Built,’ joins John Williams to talk about former Illinois Speaker of the House Mike Madigan being sentenced to over 7 years in prison. Was Ray surprised by the severity of the sentence?
Ray Long, the great investigative reporter at the Chicago Tribune, and author of the book, ‘The House that Madigan Built,’ joins John Williams to talk about former Illinois Speaker of the House Mike Madigan being sentenced to over 7 years in prison. Was Ray surprised by the severity of the sentence?
A new study from researchers at the University of Zurich and Harvard University reveals that bonobos, our closest living relatives alongside chimpanzees, use the equivalent of word compounds and phrasings, suggesting that the roots of language predate humans. Anthony and Jeff discuss the ramifications of the discovery of these building blocks of communication in the animal kingdom.LInk to the story: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2025/04/turns-out-bonobos-talk-a-lot-like-humans/Support the show and get bonus episodes, videos, Discord community access and more! http://patreon.com/wehaveconcernsJeff on Blue Sky: https://bsky.app/profile/jeffcannata.bsky.socialAnthony on Blue Sky: https://bsky.app/profile/acarboni.bsky.social
What if your anxiety isn't a problem to fix… but a message to listen to?
In 1710, the British Parliament passed a piece of legislation entitled An Act for the Encouragement of Learning. It became known as the Statute of Anne, and it was the world's first copyright law. Copyright protects and regulates a piece of work - whether that's a book, a painting, a piece of music or a software programme. It emerged as a way of balancing the interests of authors, artists, publishers, and the public in the context of evolving technologies and the rise of mechanical reproduction. Writers and artists such as Alexander Pope, William Hogarth and Charles Dickens became involved in heated debates about ownership and originality that continue to this day - especially with the emergence of artificial intelligence. With:Lionel Bently, Herchel Smith Professor of Intellectual Property Law at the University of CambridgeWill Slauter, Professor of History at Sorbonne University, ParisKatie McGettigan, Senior Lecturer in American Literature at Royal Holloway, University of London. Producer: Eliane GlaserReading list:Isabella Alexander, Copyright Law and the Public Interest in the Nineteenth Century (Hart Publishing, 2010)Isabella Alexander and H. Tomás Gómez-Arostegui (eds), Research Handbook on the History of Copyright Law (Edward Elgar Publishing, 2016)David Bellos and Alexandre Montagu, Who Owns this Sentence? A History of Copyrights and Wrongs (Mountain Leopard Press, 2024)Oren Bracha, Owning Ideas: The Intellectual Origins of American Intellectual Property, 1790-1909 (Cambridge University Press, 2016)Elena Cooper, Art and Modern Copyright: The Contested Image (Cambridge University Press, 2018)Ronan Deazley, On the Origin of the Right to Copy: Charting the Movement of Copyright Law in Eighteenth Century Britain, 1695–1775 (Hart Publishing, 2004)Ronan Deazley, Rethinking Copyright: History, Theory, Language (Edward Elgar Publishing, 2006)Ronan Deazley, Martin Kretschmer and Lionel Bently (eds.), Privilege and Property: Essays on the History of Copyright (Open Book Publishers, 2010)Marie-Stéphanie Delamaire and Will Slauter (eds.), Circulation and Control: Artistic Culture and Intellectual Property in the Nineteenth Century (Open Book Publishers, 2021) Melissa Homestead, American Women Authors and Literary Property, 1822-1869 (Cambridge University Press, 2005)Adrian Johns, Piracy: The Intellectual Property Wars from Gutenberg to Gates (University of Chicago Press, 2009)Meredith L. McGill, American Literature and the Culture of Reprinting, 1834-1853 (University of Pennsylvania Press, 2002)Mark Rose, Authors and Owners: The Invention of Copyright (Harvard University Press, 1993)Mark Rose, Authors in Court: Scenes from the Theater of Copyright (Harvard University Press, 2018)Catherine Seville, Internationalisation of Copyright: Books, Buccaneers and the Black Flag in the Nineteenth Century (Cambridge University Press, 2006)Brad Sherman and Lionel Bently, The Making of Modern Intellectual Property Law (Cambridge University Press, 1999)Will Slauter, Who Owns the News? A History of Copyright (Stanford University Press, 2019)Robert Spoo, Without Copyrights: Piracy, Publishing and the Public Domain (Oxford University Press, 2013)In Our Time is a BBC Studios Audio production
A new MP3 sermon from The Narrated Puritan is now available on SermonAudio with the following details: Title: The Sentence of Death in Ourselves Subtitle: The Pastor In Prayer Speaker: C. H. Spurgeon Broadcaster: The Narrated Puritan Event: Sunday Service Date: 6/12/2025 Bible: 2 Corinthians 1:9 Length: 9 min.
A Double Lifetime Sentence Sponsors & Partners The Other Side Academy - theothersideacademy.com My Story Matters / Captain Your Story - mystorymatters.org Freedom Scholars Academy Timestamps 00:00:00 George Smith 00:01:38 Sponsors 00:02:39 Young Life 00:08:38 Back to Compton at 16 00:15:08 Filling a Need 00:23:00 Double Life Sentence at 18 years old 00:30:35 A Moment of Reflection 00:47:40 Discovering Miracles 00:50:30 Being an Agent for Change 01:01:50 From Life-Sentence to Free 01:08:34 Advice for Young Self “Ask for help… It's okay…” - George Smith
On this episode of Talking Buffalo, Patrick Moran is joined by Joe From Queens to discuss several topics, including in light of what happened this past week in the NBA with the New York Knicks and Tom Thibodeau, what it would take for Buffalo Bills owner Terry Pegula to put Sean McDermott on the hot season or even fire him.Under Thibs, the Knicks won at least 50 games in back to back seasons for the first time since the early 90's, made the playoffs four of the past five years with at least a first round win in the last three years, and made the Eastern Conference finals for the first time in 25 years. Despite all that the Knicks upper management decided Thibs had taken New York as far as they were going to go under him and fired him.That got Patrick wondering what it would take for Pegula to ultimately sour on McDermott given some of the parallels between the two teams. McDermott has led the Bills to consistently good regular seasons, division titles and even playoff wins but has hit a wall every year in the playoffs, with that wall usually being Kansas City. The guys discuss some of the similarities and differences between Thibs and McDermott and try to paint a picture of what it would take, realistically for Pegula to decide that maybe it's time to move on and find a coach that'll get them over the hump. Of course, that coach may ultimately be McDermott and that's discussed too.Also, the James Cook situation isn't getting better per most recent reports and the guys have thoughts on that. In another Bills topic the question is posed if you'd sign up for 775 yards receiving from Keon Coleman this season right now. That plus Joe's Mt. Flushmore of crappy Sabres suits, Patrick's "Finish the Sentence" segment and plenty more.Major props to Talking Buffalo sponsor, Sonny Red's at 1841 Abbott Road in Lackawanna, just minutes from Highmark Stadium. We consider them THE most underrated spot for wings, pizza and other great food in Western New York plus it's a great place to drink and have a great time. Also big thanks to Imperial Pizza and their two locations (1035 Abbott Road and 1655 Main Street), home of not only great pizza and tons of other delicious eats but also the best everyday lunch special in town.Special thanks to local Buffalo band, Orange Zestfor allowing us to use their awesome single, “Old Friends” as the new official intro music for Talking Buffalo. Check out Orange Zest and be sure to support not only them, but local music!♦♦♦♦♦Follow Patrick Moran/Talking Buffalo Podcast Substack: Patrick Moran's SubstackTwitter: @PatrickMoranTBBlue Sky: @PatrickMoranTB.bsky.socialInstagram: @PatrickMoranTBFacebook: Talking Buffalo Podcast
What is the worst case scenario for the Dallas Cowboys 2025 season?
This week, we continue this epic tale, with Eamonn getting serious... About drugs, drinking, fighting, and avoiding being beaten to death by the army. He wades his way through scams, and schemes, doing everything but becoming a successful boxer, until he finally buckles down, and turns pro. This will quickly score dividends, when he becomes a champion, but that doesn't mean he's done being a menace to society!!Blow your chance at being the top amateur boxer around, have your wife save your life, when the RA comes looking to take you out, and continue to commit acts of stupidity, while becoming a champion with Eamonn "The Terminator" Magee!!Check us out, every Tuesday!We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: crimeinsports@gmail.com Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!! Contact us on... twitter.com/crimeinsports crimeinsports@gmail.com facebook.com/Crimeinsports instagram.com/smalltownmurderSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
This week, we Eamonn's story continues, as he keeps boxing, becoming one of the biggest up and comers in Northern Ireland. He is also shot twice. Once by the Brits, and once by his own people. He almost loses his life, when his throat is slashed with a broken bottle, and he even beats someone senseless, at an NYC McDonalds! He also misses the Olympics, out of spite. A wild ride!!Be shot by soldiers, while trying to light a molotov cocktail, beat an American senseless for improper McDonalds drive thru etiquette, and nearly have your jugular severed because you didn't have an extra cigarette with Eamonn "The Terminator" Magee - Part 2!!Check us out, every Tuesday!We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: crimeinsports@gmail.com Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!! Contact us on... twitter.com/crimeinsports crimeinsports@gmail.com facebook.com/Crimeinsports instagram.com/smalltownmurderSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.