Podcasts about Intimate

San Francisco's Nina LaCour is a bestselling YA author who has turned to adult novels in the past few years. Her new book, “Meet Me In the Garden” is a shimmering novel about a Creole family's migration from New Orleans to California and the ways that they reinterpret their racial and queer identities in their new home. We talk about the Great Migration, the promise of California, and writing characters readers actually love. Guest: Nina LaCour, author, “Meet Me in the Garden,” “Yerba Buena” and “We Are Okay” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if the person you call the love of your life entered carrying the key to the place where you still believe you are incomplete? Human beings begin life dependent. That dependence is innocent. A child requires regulation, protection, recognition, touch, presence, and care. When those needs remain unfinished, adulthood can inherit more than pain. It can inherit an assignment. Find somebody who will finally make the old absence stop hurting. Then attraction can feel like destiny because conditioning recognizes a familiar role before consciousness recognizes the script. The divine mirrored intimate play places another free, changing human being close enough to activate what solitude can keep hidden. Their distance can uncover abandonment. Independence can expose control. A boundary can reveal entitlement. Desire can expose the hunger to be chosen. Change can uncover the fear beneath your demand for permanence. The mirror shows something devastating. You have been asking an impermanent person to provide permanent evidence that you are truly whole. Bodies age, feelings move, circumstances turn, identities evolve, and relationships change form. Impermanence keeps its promise. The false self fights that fact because psychological need requires continuity of supply. Here need becomes the original sin when innocent childhood dependence survives as the adult belief that completion exists somewhere outside the self. Perhaps the fine tuning serves one ruthless purpose. Whatever you keep demanding from another person returns as a question about what remains uncultivated, disowned, or unclaimed within you. Can you become internally what you keep hiring romantic love to provide externally? Psychological freedom begins when another person can matter enormously without carrying responsibility for your wholeness. Then love loses its job as rescue. The mirror has done its work for you. You finally meet the person across from you after you stop trying to find yourself inside them.

Clarence Ford spoke to Najma Altalib from Pelvic Care (Rondebosch branch) is changing intimate wellness for men and women. Views and News with Clarence Ford is the mid-morning show on CapeTalk. This 3-hour-long programme shares and reflects a broad array of perspectives. It is inspirational, passionate and positive. Host Clarence Ford’s gentle curiosity and dapper demeanour leave listeners feeling motivated and empowered. Known for his love of jazz and golf, Clarrie covers a range of themes including relationships, heritage and philosophy. Popular segments include Barbs’ Wire at 9:30 am (Mon-Thurs) and The Naked Scientist at 9:30 on Fridays. Thank you for listening to a podcast from Views & News with Clarence Ford Listen live on Primedia+ weekdays between 09:00 and 12:00 (SA Time) to Views and News with Clarence Ford broadcast on CapeTalk https://buff.ly/NnFM3Nk For more from the show, go to https://buff.ly/erjiQj2 or find all the catch-up podcasts here https://buff.ly/BdpaXRn Subscribe to the CapeTalk Daily and Weekly Newsletters https://buff.ly/sbvVZD5 Follow us on social media: CapeTalk on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CapeTalk CapeTalk on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@capetalk CapeTalk on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ CapeTalk on X: https://x.com/CapeTalk CapeTalk on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CapeTalk567 See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Build on your marriage every day. Reinforce the foundations now so the pressures of life can't shake your relationship. To support this ministry financially, visit: https://www.oneplace.com/donate/779/29?v=20251111

Rosie O'Donnell Reveals Details About Filming Her Only Intimate TV Scene With a Man — 'He Was Just So Perfect'Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Several of my recent guests have described sexual assault that occurred within an intimate relationship and was accomplished through coercion rather than immediately recognizable physical force. Some of the responses I received to those conversations made me realize how deeply misunderstood this form of sexual violence remains. In this episode, I draw upon my experience as a former detective and longtime trainer of sexual assault investigators to examine what coercion actually looks like and why the absence of visible force should never be mistaken for the presence of consent. Coercion rarely exists within the boundaries of one isolated sexual encounter. Its meaning may be found in the history of the relationship, where previous threats, intimidation, retaliation, financial control, or violence have already established what refusing will cost. Once an offender has created that environment, very little may need to be said in the moment. A gesture, a change in tone, or a few seemingly ordinary words can carry a meaning that is unmistakable to the person who has learned what comes next. I also explore the neuroscience behind coercive abuse, including the brain's ability to recognize patterns of danger, the effects of chronic stress on the nervous system, and the ways trauma can influence attention, memory, perception, and decision making. This understanding is especially important for investigators and other professionals who may otherwise misinterpret delayed disclosure, fragmented memory, continued contact with the offender, or the absence of physical resistance. Coercive sexual assault cannot be understood by examining the victim's response while ignoring the conditions the offender deliberately created. The central issue is not whether a victim resisted visibly or forcefully enough. It is whether fear, intimidation, threats, or an established pattern of coercion deprived that person of the freedom required to make a genuine sexual choice. An intimate relationship does not diminish that violation. It makes the betrayal more intimate. An important side note: if you're finding value in this show and these amazing episodes, please take a moment to leave a 5-star rating on your podcast platform. AND, follow SexualAssaultSurvivorStories on Instagram, then, please send me a note of support. I can't tell you how much your emails mean to me—they fuel my passion to keep this podcast going. And if you're a victim or survivor and are ready to tell your story in order to help yourself or someone else heal, let me know, and we can start a conversation about the possibility of you being on the show. Here's my email address: dave@sasstories.com Thank you to all of you who have reached out to me already. Just provide me with a phone number where I can reach back out to you…because I like to talk to people who are interested in guesting. And please keep those emails and texts coming…I truly look forward to hearing from you and hearing your input on the stories and guests featured on this show. Here are some critically important links that I hope you'll take the time to explore, and where a contribution is requested, please consider doing so! https://1in6.org/ https://soulwisesolutions.com https://safeinharmsway.org https://sironahealing.com/ https://www.whattheydontsay.com www.arcigrey.com https://startbybelieving.org https://evawintl.org/ As mentioned, and emphasized, it's time to Normalize the Conversation.™ And please remember to Start by Believing…because we all know someone whose life has been impacted by rape or sexual assault. Thank you for tuning in. -Dave

Jonathan Mallie from Populous joins Jeremy White and Joe DiBiase to discuss the design philosophy behind the new Highmark Stadium. He explains the focus on fan intimacy, the engineering of the protective canopy, and addresses common questions about stadium stairs and scoreboard size. 01:30 - Jonathan Mallie Interview 04:44 - Stadium Stairs and Layout 10:07 - Canopy and Sound Design 15:05 - Scoreboard and Fan Experience

Jeremy White and Joe DiBiase evaluate potential Buffalo Bills breakout players and review Dion Dawkins' performance metrics. They are joined by Populous managing director Jonathan Mallie to discuss the design principles and fan amenities of the new Highmark Stadium. The conversation also explores NFL quarterback development challenges in the wake of J.J. McCarthy's current backup status. 02:25 - Preseason Football News 07:38 - Bills Breakout Candidates 12:41 - Roster Depth Discussion 19:10 - Dion Dawkins Review 26:54 - Highmark Stadium Design 34:36 - Stadium Canopy Features 43:21 - QB Development Debate

Text us with topic or guest suggestions!If you spoke to 20 international educators and asked them what factors led them to taking the initial leap into international education, you would likely get 20 very different answers! And if you interviewed as many as 94, well, you can imagine the stories you would hear. Such is the task that Dr. Ettie Zilber set herself.Ettie joined Audey for this episode and shared the eight categories of catalysts, as she has dubbed them, that emerged from her doctoral research on this topic. She also shared many of the stories that her interviewees told her. We know you will connect with the 8 categories of Catalysts as well as with some of the stories.Before retiring from paid employment, Ettie enjoyed a long career in international schools in Israel, Singapore, Spain, Guatemala, China and the USA, serving first as an educator and then as a school Director.She served on the Boards of several Regional Associations and taught graduate courses for four universities which catered to international school educators. After doctoral research on Third Culture Kids, she published the book Third Culture Kids: Children of International School Educators. Other publications relevant to international schools include “Catalysts for a Career in International Schools,” “A Primer for Administrators applying to Proprietary Schools,” and many more, available on www.ettiezilber.comShe continues to conduct workshops on Cross Cultural Understanding at schools and other multi-national organizations.She lives in Arizona with her husband of 52 years,  and enjoys visits with her children and grandchildren (one of whom is also a TCK/CCK). Guiding Question:“What are some factors that prompt teachers to leave their home countries and seek employment in international schools overseas?” Topics Addressed Included:Definition of terms (TCK, TCA, ACCK, CCA, multiracial/cultural children, Children of immigrants, Children of refugees, Children of minorities, International adoptees, Domestic TCKs, Educational CCKs, Self-initiated and Assigned Expatriates, push-pull factors of migration)THE BIG 8 - Eight factors that prompt people to decide to teach internationallyChildhood as a CCK (Cross-Cultural Kid)Grew up listening to family stories/seeing artefacts/had family history overseasInfluenced by teachers/colleagues or friends' stories/artefactsReading/literature, TV about overseas Or desire to learn EnglishGrew up in multicultural environment (school, community)Early international travel experiences (independent of family)Intimate relationship/loved oneLife/labour/career status dissatisfaction How hiring schools can seek to leverage these factors in order to grow W4 Wanderlust in general and thus expand their candidate poolsContact Ettie:LinkedInResources Mentioned:Ettie's Consulting Website www.ettiezilber.comEttie's ECIS article on her research 0 ecis+INFOCUS_Ettie_Zilber(1).pdfRecorded on July 17, 2026#transitions | #internationaleducation | goingglobalSupport the showRemember to access our Educators Going Global website for more information and consider joining our Patreon community at patreon/educatorsgoingglobal!Email us with comments or suggestions at educatorsgoingglobal@gmail.com Follow us on LinkedIn, Facebook,  Instagram or YouTube.Listen on your favorite podcast app: connect from our share page.Music: YouTube. (2022). Acoustic Guitar | Folk | No copyright | 2022❤️. YouTube. Retrieved October 11, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOEmg_6i7jA.  

Intimate partner violence (IPV) is far more common than many clinicians realize; it often presents ways that don't fit the stereotypes. In this episode of the Friends of NPACE Podcast, NPACE Executive Director and family nurse practitioner Terri Schmitt sits down with Dr. Debbie Granick, psychiatric nurse practitioner, licensed clinical social worker, educator, and author, for an important conversation about recognizing and responding to intimate partner violence in clinical practice. Together, they discuss how IPV can manifest through chronic pain, headaches, gastrointestinal complaints, anxiety, depression, insomnia, and other seemingly unrelated symptoms. Dr. Granick shares practical, trauma-informed communication strategies that help clinicians create safer spaces for disclosure, build trust, and support patients without taking away their autonomy. Complete this episode on the NPACE Learning Center and earn 1.00 CE Credits! Resources National Domestic Violence Hotline - https://www.thehotline.org CDC resources - https://www.cdc.gov/intimate-partner-violence/about/index.html Futures without violence - https://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/ Mandated reporter information - Futures Without Violence's Compendium of State Mandatory Reporting Law

A child enters the world carrying extraordinary potential and almost no framework for understanding themselves. Every smile, every correction, every silence, every expression of approval or disappointment becomes part of the architecture through which they eventually interpret love, value, competence, and belonging. Development begins as dependence. Maturity requires a gradual movement toward self-authorship. Intimate relationships inherit that unfinished transition. They become the first place where two fully formed adults discover how much of their inner authority still depends upon another person's reflection. That discovery introduces one of the least examined paradoxes in human relationships. Love asks us to matter deeply to one another. Development asks us never to become the owner of another person's becoming. Many relationships quietly collapse these two realities into one. Accountability slowly transforms into supervision. Concern evolves into management. Guidance becomes correction. Before long, one partner occupies the invisible position of evaluator while the other unconsciously accepts the role of perpetual student. Both people lose something essential. One loses humility. The other loses sovereignty. The opposite arrangement proves equally costly. A relationship unwilling to confront distortion does not preserve peace. It merely postpones conflict until reality presents the invoice. Unchallenged defensiveness, rationalization, avoidance, dishonesty, resentment, addiction, emotional immaturity, and unconscious repetition rarely disappear through acceptance alone. Human beings require mirrors. Without reflection, self-deception often becomes indistinguishable from authenticity. The investigation therefore refuses both extremes. What kind of accountability protects dignity without protecting illusion? How does one expose contradiction without assigning identity? How does someone tell the truth without attempting to occupy the throne of another person's conscience? These questions extend beyond communication skills. They touch the deeper architecture of human development. Psychologically, every person requires enough challenge to expose unconscious patterns and enough freedom to integrate those discoveries voluntarily. Philosophically, wisdom cannot be transferred like property. It must become internally recognized before it becomes genuinely lived. Spiritually, transformation loses its integrity the moment it becomes coerced, because authentic awakening cannot be manufactured through external pressure. Anthropologically, every civilization has wrestled with the same enduring tension: communities survive by transmitting standards, yet individuals flourish by eventually internalizing those standards rather than merely obeying them. Perhaps intimate relationships reveal this tension more clearly than any other human institution. Perhaps accountability reaches its highest form when it no longer seeks compliance but clarity. Perhaps the healthiest partners refuse two temptations with equal discipline. They refuse to abandon one another to comforting illusions. They also refuse to become architects of one another's identities. A mirror performs one remarkable function. It reveals. It does not command. It does not negotiate. It does not force. It does not rewrite what stands before it. The person standing in front of the mirror remains completely free to acknowledge what they see, deny what they see, or walk away altogether. Could healthy love operate according to the same principle? Could the deepest purpose of relational accountability involve creating the conditions where truth becomes increasingly difficult to escape, while freedom remains completely intact? If so, perhaps the strongest relationships do not produce the most obedient partners. Perhaps they produce two people whose capacity for honest self-confrontation becomes so refined that each eventually needs less correction from the other because each has become increasingly accountable to the person staring back from the mirror.

Many Jewish young adults reach their wedding night with almost no real guidance on intimacy and sexuality. Rabbi Scott Kahn and sex and relationship therapist Talli Rosenbaum open the series by explaining why these conversations need to start years before the chuppah, and what's ahead in the next nine episodes. The remaining nine episodes of Intimacy and Sexuality for Emerging Adults will drop this Saturday night, August 8th. Subscribe today on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts.

As we approach Intimate Partner Betrayal Awareness Day, August 4, Coach Andrea shares why everyone should care about betrayal awareness. When one person experiences intimate partner betrayal, it's not an individual problem; it's a collective issue. Coach Andrea gives three compelling reasons to provide practical ways we can make the world a better place.Betrayal Awareness Day - www.IPBAwareness.orgWork with Coach Andrea - www.fullyalivecoachingllc.com2005 Study - https://news.osu.edu/stress-substantially-slows-human-bodys-ability-to-heal/

Do you truly long for God's intimate fellowship, or has your spiritual thirst quietly faded? In this devotion from Words From The Word, Pastor Roderick Webster opens Psalm 63 in the KJV and leads us into a powerful reflection on what it means to passionately pursue God with every part of who we are.You might be asking: Why does thirst describe a relationship with God? Can I really grow a burning desire for the Lord? What does it look like when a believer genuinely longs for God?Drawing from Psalm 63:1-2, Psalm 42:1-2, Psalm 84:2, and John 7:37 in the KJV, Pastor Roderick Webster shows us that the passionate believer does not simply know about God — they long for Him the way a thirsty traveler longs for water in a dry and weary land.Key points from this devotion:- A passionate believer acknowledges a personal relationship with God- True passion for God is expressed through a deep, confessed longing for fellowship with Him- Thirst for God, like physical thirst, cannot be satisfied by substitutes- Jesus Himself extends an open invitation to every thirsty soul in John 7:37- Spending time in God's Word is what fuels and grows this spiritual longingIf this devotion encouraged you, please like, comment, and share it with someone who needs it today. Subscribe so you never miss a word from the Word.Stay connected with GNBC:

Some smooth & mellow R&B tracks produced or co-produced by Babyface! 

Season 6, Episode 770: A replay of this conversation is being published to get the video version onto podcast apps for a more genuine expereince for listeners and watchers. In this tantalizing episode, Ruan welcomes sex coach extraordinaire Lee Jagger, CEO and founder of Rock the Bedroom. Lee has transformed the lives of thousands of women by empowering them with her signature erotic massage techniques, helping them to forge deeper connections with their partners and ignite confidence in the bedroom.  Preorder Ruan Willow's new dark romance novel Spring Break & Stranded at a Cabin with 7 Chosen Men, a Why Choose romance, a dark romance, new adult: get the book Episode summary: Lee and Ruan explore the misconceptions surrounding erotic massage, revealing that it's so much more than a mere hand job. It's a journey of slow, sensual exploration that can include the entire body, with over 69 techniques that a man simply can't perform on himself. Lee shares her personal story of transformation from being homeless to becoming a beacon of sensual empowerment for women everywhere. The discussion delves into the importance of playtime (not just foreplay), the art of communication, and the power of treating your partner like royalty. Lee emphasizes that when it comes to touching, men crave the sensation of being desired, and she challenges women to touch their partners like they love it, transforming obligatory acts into moments of genuine pleasure. Lee also shares valuable insights on how these techniques can enhance sexual experiences for men with erection challenges, offering alternatives to intercourse that still provide deep satisfaction. And for the singles out there, Lee discusses how these skills can boost confidence in the dating world, attracting partners who will cherish and respect them. Don't miss this episode that's as informative as it is steamy, it could save your relationship. Lee Jagger's advice is life changing. Website: https://www.rockthebedroom.com Podcast: https://rockthebedroompodcast.buzzsprout.com IG: https://www.instagram.com/rockthebedroom/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@rockthebedroom Episode topics The journey from homelessness to empowering women in the bedroom Understanding the true essence of erotic massage The power of confidence in the bedroom and its ripple effect on relationships Is that why you became a sex coach for women? Lee: When I started erotic massage, my boyfriend couldn't even get an erection Our sex ed in America is so focused on reproduction and ignores pleasure, intimacy, female anatomy, and enthusiastic consent The importance of intimacy and connection beyond intercourse Addressing the challenges of single women and the importance of self-worth in dating Communication in the bedroom Importance of touching your partner with genuine desire and love Prefer the term playtime over foreplay Women often assume that flaccid penis doesn't do anything One thing men really wish that women knew about touching a man's body When you have control in the bedroom, you have the best sex Ruan's books: https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/ Lacey Cross Hotwife books, narrated by podcast host and narrrator Ruan Willow: https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/hotwifebooks Neighborhood Sex Secrets: https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/neighborhoodsexsecrets Neighborhood Secrets (discreet title cover version): https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/neighborhoodsecretssfwcover Support the show Newsletters https://subscribepage.io/ruanwillow https://linktr.ee/RuanWillow

Questions? Comments? Text Us!What makes romantic love feel more powerful than reason, safer choices, or even self-preservation? And what does it mean to experience God's love through the person who loves you?In this intimate dialogue, Jerry and Abigail return to God's striking instruction: “Let Abigail love you. You will feel My love through her.” Jerry reflects on why God's love might need to become tangible through another person, while Abigail considers what it means to embody that love through presence, touch, sacrifice, and a shared life.Abigail reflects on falling in love as an overwhelming force that resisted every attempt to explain or contain it. Not psychology. Not philosophy. Not even Husserl's phenomenology could give her enough distance from the pull of erotic and romantic love.Their conversation moves through desire, sacrifice, feminism, sexuality, and the difference between casual sex and a love that asks something deeper of us. Abigail recalls leaving behind an ideal life in New York, not in search of comfort or happiness, but because love itself carried an authority she could not ignore.From the Garden of Eden to Dante, Jane Austen, the Brontës, D. H. Lawrence, Hemingway, and Dickens, Jerry and Abigail ask what modern culture may have lost when sex became detached from romance, courtship, nobility, and risk.Can erotic love still awaken courage, devotion, and sacrifice? And can the love between two people reveal something of God that cannot be felt any other way?Get the books:Radically Personal: God and Ourselves in the New Axial AgeGod: An Autobiography, As Told to a PhilosopherConfessions of a Young PhilosopherA Good Look at Evil***Ultimate Questions***Listen to the full episode and explore the question with a community of philosophers and seekers.Join the Ultimate Questions conversation on calling and divine guidance: https://substack.com/@ultimatequestionsOther Series:The podcast began with the Dramatic Adaptation of the book and now has several series:The Life Wisdom Project – Spiritual insights on living a wiser, more meaningful life.From God to Jerry to You – Divine messages and breakthroughs for seekers.Two Philosophers Wrestle With God – A dialogue on God, truth, and reason.Jerry & Abigail: An Intimate Dialogue – Love, faith, and divine presence in partnership.What's Your Spiritual Story – Real stories of people changed by encounters with God.What's On Our Mind – Reflections from Jerry and Scott on recent episodes.What's On Your Mind – Listener questions, divine answers, and open dialogue. Stay ConnectedShare: questions@godanautobiography.comGet the books: God: An Autobiography, Radically Personal, Confessions of a Young Philosopher, A Good Look at EvilShare Your Story | Site | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | YouTube

El pianista y compositor porteño Hernán Jacinto ganó el Premio Gardel 2025 al mejor álbum de jazz por su disco instrumental 'Gardel', grabado en trío de piano, contrabajo y batería, con tangos clásicos como 'Yira yira', 'Por una cabeza', 'Mi Buenos Aires querido' o 'El día que me quieras'. Del disco 'Intimate', de la cantante y trompetista barcelonesa Andrea Motis, 'Preconceito', 'You sent me flying' de Amy Winehouse, 'Beatriz' de Edu Lobo y Chico Buarque y 'De mica en mica' de Serrat. Y de la también barcelonesa, cantante, Diana Palau en cuarteto, 'Este seu olhar 'y 'Derradeira primavera' de Jobim. También Gilberto Gil con 'Palco' y 'Eu vim da Bahia' de su disco 'Tempo rei vol.1' y Moyses dos Santos con 'Boa viagem' de su disco 'Maria'.Escuchar audio

Don't have time to listen to the entire Dave & Chuck the Freak podcast? Check out some of the tastiest bits of the day, including ChatpGPT relationships, someone thinks Jason has a sexy voice, a guy burned his feet on the cement and so much more! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What happens to male leadership when female dependence disappears? For generations, many cultures placed men at the head of the intimate household before asking whether the man possessed the judgment, restraint, emotional range, accountability, or relational competence required to lead anything. Gender supplied the title. Provision supplied the evidence. Female dependence supplied the stage. Yet the arrival of the self-sufficient woman forces the arrangement into open court. Can a man still recognize himself as valuable when he is no longer financially necessary, emotionally indispensable, physically dominant, socially authorized, or automatically obeyed? Can he remain grounded when a woman says, “I can live without you, and I still choose you”? That sentence may represent love in its freest form. It may also terrify anyone whose identity depends upon necessity. This investigation asks whether some forms of male leadership rest upon competence or contrast. A man may appear powerful because a woman has been trained to appear less powerful. He may seem decisive because she has been discouraged from deciding. She may perform dependence because protection, relief, status, erotic tension, or freedom from responsibility rewards the performance. The arrangement may therefore operate as a hidden exchange: he receives relevance; she receives exemption. The deeper problem concerns power itself. Can leadership remain ethical when another person's weakness protects the leader's identity? Can a leader remain objective while benefiting from the condition he claims to guide? Does authentic leadership create permanent followers, or does it strengthen another person until following becomes unnecessary? Perhaps the final test of relationship leadership arrives after need has died. No helplessness remains to manage. No cultural title can settle the question. No dependency can impersonate devotion. Only two sovereign adults remain. At that point, leadership must prove that it can survive freedom, equality, disagreement, competence, and choice. Otherwise, the relationship never contained a leader and a needer. It contained two people protecting a bargain neither could afford to expose.

What happens to male leadership when female dependence disappears? For generations, many cultures placed men at the head of the intimate household before asking whether the man possessed the judgment, restraint, emotional range, accountability, or relational competence required to lead anything. Gender supplied the title. Provision supplied the evidence. Female dependence supplied the stage. Yet the arrival of the self-sufficient woman forces the arrangement into open court. Can a man still recognize himself as valuable when he is no longer financially necessary, emotionally indispensable, physically dominant, socially authorized, or automatically obeyed? Can he remain grounded when a woman says, “I can live without you, and I still choose you”? That sentence may represent love in its freest form. It may also terrify anyone whose identity depends upon necessity. This investigation asks whether some forms of male leadership rest upon competence or contrast. A man may appear powerful because a woman has been trained to appear less powerful. He may seem decisive because she has been discouraged from deciding. She may perform dependence because protection, relief, status, erotic tension, or freedom from responsibility rewards the performance. The arrangement may therefore operate as a hidden exchange: he receives relevance; she receives exemption. The deeper problem concerns power itself. Can leadership remain ethical when another person's weakness protects the leader's identity? Can a leader remain objective while benefiting from the condition he claims to guide? Does authentic leadership create permanent followers, or does it strengthen another person until following becomes unnecessary? Perhaps the final test of relationship leadership arrives after need has died. No helplessness remains to manage. No cultural title can settle the question. No dependency can impersonate devotion. Only two sovereign adults remain. At that point, leadership must prove that it can survive freedom, equality, disagreement, competence, and choice. Otherwise, the relationship never contained a leader and a needer. It contained two people protecting a bargain neither could afford to expose.

This one is a little different. For over 100 episodes Gabriella has been the one asking the questions. This time, Sally Mueller, co-founder and CEO of Womaness, turns the tables. And what comes out of that conversation is one of the most practical and honest discussions this show has ever had about intimate wellness, comfort, and what it actually means to take care of this part of your body.Womaness is a brand that has been modernizing the conversation around menopause and intimate wellness through education, community, and thoughtfully designed products that support women from head to toe. Gabriella has been a proud Womaness brand partner for several years because she genuinely believes in their mission. In this episode she shares her personal story, her own five-step intimate wellness routine, and a recent experience that reminded her why consistency in this area of self-care is not negotiable.The biggest message throughout? Intimate wellness is not about sex. It is about comfort, confidence, connection, and quality of life. And you deserve to prioritize it.Womaness has generously offered listeners of Pleasure in the Pause an exclusive 20% discount on their intimate wellness collection. Visit womaness.com and use code PLEASURE at checkout.Products mentioned in this episode:- MELT For You vaginal inserts — internal hydration and tissue support- Daily V Soothe — external comfort and ongoing moisture- Coco Bliss — rich external moisture for intimacy and everyday comfortUse Code PLEASURE for 20% off all Womaness Sexual Wellness productsSally Mueller, Co-Founder and CEO of Womaness, is transforming the conversation on aging and menopause. An expert in retail and brand innovation with a proven track record for trend forecasting, she has worked with major brands like Target, Who What Wear, and VERSED skincare. Inspired by her own health journey and a lack of modern menopause resources, Sally created Womaness with co-founder Michelle Jacobs. The brand offers expert- and doctor-backed solutions, fostering a movement that empowers women to celebrate life after 40. With over 20 years at Target Corporation in Apparel Merchandising and Marketing, Sally is an industry leader celebrated for her business acumen across fashion, beauty, and lifestyle.Highlights from our discussion include:Why intimate wellness is about comfort, confidence, and quality of life — not just what happens in the bedroomThe difference between hydration and lubrication, and why most women need bothWhy silence around intimate health creates shame, and why speaking up changes everythingHow to advocate for yourself with your partner and your doctor when it comes to intimate health changesWhy being proactive about intimate wellness — before symptoms become severe — is the most important shift a woman can makeThe role of self-pleasure in supporting tissue health, body connection, and overall wellbeing Your comfort matters first. Not anyone else's. And the changes that come with perimenopause and menopause are common — but suffering through them in silence does not have to be. There are solutions, there is support, and there are products designed specifically to help you feel comfortable, confident, and connected to your body every single day. Use Code PLEASURE for 20% off all Womaness Sexual Wellness products.CONNECT WITH SALLY MUELLER:Womaness: https://womaness.com/collections/menopause-sexual-health-and-feminine-careWomaness Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mywomaness/Sally Mueller LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sally-mueller/Episode with Ashley Kelsch CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA:InstagramLinkedInWork with Gabriella! Full episodes on YouTube.The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

Are you hopelessly attracted to the mirror image of patterns you claim you want to escape? And beneath that: What if the person you call “my type” is simply someone unusually qualified to recognize, tolerate, reinforce, or worship the version of you that you have mistaken for yourself?

Are you hopelessly attracted to the mirror image of patterns you claim you want to escape? And beneath that: What if the person you call “my type” is simply someone unusually qualified to recognize, tolerate, reinforce, or worship the version of you that you have mistaken for yourself?

Most couples never realize they've been believing lies about sex for years.They compare their marriage to Hollywood, social media, or unrealistic expectations and then wonder why intimacy feels disappointing, frustrating, or disconnected. The truth? Many of the "rules" we've been taught about sex are actually the very things keeping us from experiencing the passionate, connected, and fulfilling intimacy we all want.In this eye-opening episode, Nick and Amy expose some of the biggest myths about sex and reveal the truths that can completely transform your intimate relationship.You'll discover why:Waiting until you're "in the mood" may be hurting your sex life.Your spouse can't read your mind (and why that's actually a good thing).Women don't always take longer to become aroused.Sex is far more than just a "want."Talking about sex doesn't kill the mood—it creates better intimacy.Spontaneous sex isn't the only (or even the best) kind of sex....and many more myths that could be holding your marriage back.If you've ever wondered why your sex life isn't where you want it to be, this episode could change the way you think about intimacy forever. Stop believing the myths. Start creating the marriage and the intimacy you've always wanted.

Colin and Mike discuss a fun board game weekend, along with The Odyssey, and a new album from The Strokes.

Betrayal has been described as an earthquake, a war, and all manner of destruction. In today's episode, Coach Andrea shares three powerful analogies to compare intimate partner betrayal: home invasion, hurricanes, and a shipwreck. It can be difficult to capture the magnitude of betrayal into words, but to raise awareness, we must try. Intimate partner betrayal is one of most destructive forms of trauma, with the least amount of attention to survivors. Intimate Partner Betrayal Awareness Day, August 4, was created to change that. Go to www.IPBAwareness.org for details.Purchase an Ember of Light: https://www.fullyalivecoachingllc.com/an-ember-of-light

To Every Generation...The teaching ministry of Calvary Chapel Crossfields.....Join us as we go verse by verse through the Bible.

Full show - FrYiday | Junk injury | News or Nope - JP Saxe at Brothers in Lone Tree, Grease, and offensive smells | Feel Good Friday | Are cavities your own fault? | BYOB | Maybe Slacker should be more confrontational | Stupid stories | What is each of our brands? | Good Dad, Bad Dad - Zits www.instagram.com/theslackershow www.instagram.com/askslacker www.instagram.com/ericasheaaa www.instagram.com/thackiswack www.instagram.com/radioerin RSVP to our LIMITED and INTIMATE show with JP SAXE!! It's happening MONDAY at BROTHERS BAR AND GRILL in LONE TREE! Get your RSVP in here: https://www.audacy.com/alice1059/events/jp-saxe-listening-party

Today's episode is an interview revisited that originally aired in February of 2022. Our guest is Khandro Kunzang Dechen Chödrön, who spent decades living, practicing, and receiving teachings from two uncompromising yogic masters of our time. She speaks about devotion, the hidden oral lineages of Tantric practice, the yogas of tsalung and tummo, and what it means to stop playing games with yourself. Time notes: 00:00:00 — Introduction 00:02:07 — First encounter with dharma 00:09:51 — Karmic seeds ripening 00:11:38 — Lama Dawa and what is a ngakpa? 00:17:53 — Responsibility for the elements 00:19:00 — Examples of elemental mastery 00:21:27 — Lama Dawa's qualities as a teacher 00:22:45 — Why Lamas avoid spirit talk 00:26:58 — Life after Lama Dawa's passing 00:30:50 — Meeting Kunzang Dorje Rinpoche 00:39:24 — Desire for an uncompromising teacher 00:39:33 — Renunciation sparked by Yeshe Tsogyal 00:42:18 — Rigdzin Sökdrup lineage 00:42:45 — Years of retreat in Nepal 00:51:34 — On tsalung 01:01:39 — Tending the body: Lu Jong, neyjang 01:04:24 — Subtle energetic systems explained 01:10:15 — Bliss and emptiness connection 01:13:40 — Intimate retreat with a teacher 01:14:02 — Uniqueness of guru-disciple model 01:18:31 — Finding teachers today 01:18:39 — Sacrifices required   For more episodes with Khandro Kunzang: Devotion, Maturation & the Guru https://oliviaclementine.com/khandro-kunzang-dechen-chodron-devotion-maturation-the-guru/   Vajrakilaya, Guru Rinpoche Prophecies & the Mandala Principle https://oliviaclementine.com/khandro-kunzang-dechen-chodron-vajrakilaya-guru-rinpoche-prophecies-the-mandala-principle/   Elemental Spirits, Vajra Armor & Dharma Marriage https://oliviaclementine.com/khandro-kunzang-elemental-spirits-vajra-armor-dharma-marriage/   Cultivating Siddhis, Tukdam, Lineage Protection & Consortship https://oliviaclementine.com/khandro-kunzang-cultivating-siddhis-tukdam-lineage-protection-consortship/   Further Links: Connect with Khandro Kunzang  https://www.phurbathinleyling.org/   Learn About & Support the P'hurba Peace Mandala Project https://www.phurbathinleyling.org/the-peace-mandala-project/   Podcast website & episode transcript: https://oliviaclementine.com/khandro-kunzang-the-oral-instruction-lineage-ngagpas-himalayan-yogas-of-tsa-lung-and-tummo/

Drop us a line or two . . .We open mid-life, mid-rain, mid-chaos — and fully on brand. Queenie's kicking things off fresh off a family reunion that somehow pulled together around 60 people under a pavilion while the weather did its worst. The rain, she reports, was actually a blessing — it corralled everyone together and made for a genuinely lovely day. Her mom, the family matriarch, had someone at her side every minute. Seven hours on poured concrete. Sixty people. Special-edition 250th anniversary rubber ducks wearing Uncle Sam hats and Mardi Gras beads. Trivia questions. Revolutionary War research that Queenie will readily admit her procrastination kept from being as thorough as intended. The ducks, she assures everyone, will be collector's items. Future generations will hold them up and say, "Look at this relic from when the Republic still stood." The physical toll of the reunion caught up with Queenie overnight — leg cramps, dehydration, chanting through the pain — which leads, naturally, into a colonoscopy update. Because of course it does. The prep, she confirms, is indeed a blast. Moving on. TT, meanwhile, is already feeling the effects of the big-ass bag of gummies — yes, that big-ass bag, the one they apparently weren't sure would still have any potency. It does. Potency plus. Queenie's working her way through a Hepworth Citrus Slurp — a teeny-weeny 0.35g pre-rolled dog walker, sun grown, naturally terpene rich, and delivering a clean sativa energy. The fly in the room, apparently, got the memo and departed when the fly swatter appeared, which sends them into a genuinely delightful detour about whether ants retrieve their dead, mourn their dead, or potentially require DNA evidence before accepting that a fallen comrade is really gone. Alexa is consulted. Designated undertaker workers, she reports, sense a death pheromone and remove corpses from the colony. They're just being tidy. The ants. Just being tidy. From ant funerals, Queenie pivots to a rant about the total myth of the paperless digital revolution, which she has been living in real time while navigating bureaucratic systems with assignees. Motor vehicles. Government agencies. Bank accounts. Not one transaction in twenty goes smoothly. You always need a paper backup for the digital. You always need to wait. You get called, miss your number, get called again out of sequence, haven't had a chance to fill out a single form yet because you were pulled to get your photo taken first. The receipt multiplies. The paperwork multiplies. The fax machines are still running somewhere in a government building. It is, Queenie concludes, organized crime. You do not exist until they tell you you exist, and they decide the terms. A little raw around the edges, she admits. A concentrated few weeks. Then it's time for Wait, What — and this week's entry is genuinely warm. Queenie shares the story of a British author who, on the occasion of turning 60, invited sixty people — strangers, acquaintances, old friends, her own children — to sit down and share a cup of tea with her. Part curiosity project, part antidote to the creeping shyness that snuck up on her in her later years. She kept a blog. She opened each conversation with a few consistent questions. She found that intentional listening — actually just listening, not advising — meant her kids opened up to her in ways they hadn't before. Intimate moments. Real connection. New friendships. New ideas. Queenie loves it. TT loves it. They wonder if they could do it. TT suspects she'd enjoy it enormously but is fuzzy on the mechanics of execution. They agree the format is flexible — tea, cookies, a brownie, a gummy, whatever. The key, Queenie says, is making it intentional. The conversation wanders into the current political moment, which is everywhere and unavoidable, and Queenie reflects that at the family reunion, even with all the patriotic ducks and anniversary fanfare, the prevailing mood around current events was more forlorn than defensive. Nobody was flying any flags for the other team. She notes they grew up watching their parents' generation of siblings never conflict — and they're just modeling that behavior. You hold onto the shared history. Cousin Sharon gets a moment: the only family member to have served in an active war zone. The men were never that closely involved in any conflict. That lands quietly. TT's Choice serves up number 49: would you rather have a podcast guest who is absolutely fascinating but hates you, or who loves you but has nothing interesting to say? Both hosts go immediately for fascinating-and-hostile. The reasoning: it's better for the audience. And honestly, better for them. TT admits she can make small talk for about a minute before the panic sets in. A minute, she clarifies, is a genuinely long time when you're flapping in the wind. They'd try charm and wit to win the hostile guest over. They'd feign a dropped connection if things got dire. They'd exit gracefully. They debate whether actively seeking someone who hates you is ethically sound podcasting practice or just fishing for drama. TT starts to say something, stops herself, and refuses to share it on air. This has apparently never happened before. Queenie is mildly unsettled. The Fuck It List this week: Queenie is retiring her compulsive apologies on the pickleball court. Her class was cancelled due to Canadian wildfire smoke — the air quality has been in the red-to-dangerous range, and there are days the sky goes visibly yellow. She and TT go deep on the state of the planet: El Niño, prescribed burns, the pine bush outside Albany that has to burn to bloom, the Karner blue butterfly, fires mapped across the entire globe on Weather Underground looking like the world is literally ablaze. Japan. China. Sandstorms from the desert traveling across continents. Canada. Pittsburgh. It's a lot. Back to the fuck it: TT has been apologizing reflexively on the pickleball court every time she misses a shot — and so has her partner. They both caught themselves doing it and looked at each other. They agreed: stop. Nobody's playing for money. Nobody's walking off a cliff. TT reflects that she's not used to team sports, doesn't love the pressure, feels responsible for the group, and carries the anxiety of visible positions — goalies, pitchers, catchers, all the people in the hot spots. Queenie points out that women apologize constantly for things outside their control. Bumping into someone. Missing a shot. Existing. The episode closes on that note — and on a song: a full musical number about the reflexive female apology. Apologizing to chairs. To waiters who brought the wrong plate. To the doctor for making you wait. To the stranger who stepped on your shoe. Every woman in the room nodded. They've been sorry since the age of eight. Queenie and TT sign off warmly. Then, in true CDQ fashion, the mics keep rolling while they attempt to figure out live streaming, test whether Queenie's black t-shirt creates a floating-head effect on camera (it kind of does), reference The Wizard of Oz, and confirm that they are, in fact, quite possibly one of a kind. Welcome to the Closet Disco Queen Pot-Cast, a #1 ranked Women in Cannabis (Feedspot, Million Pods; 2025) comedy podcast with music and pop culture references that keeps you laughing and engaged. Join our hosts, Queenie & TT as they share humorous anecdotes about daily life, offering women's perspectives on lifestyle and wellness. We dive into funny cannabis conversations and stories, creating an entertaining space where nothing is off-limits. Each episode features entertaining discussions on pop culture trends, as we discuss music, culture, and cannabis in a light-hearted and inclusive manner. Tune in for a delightful blend of humor, insight, and relatable stories that celebrate life's quirks and pleasures. Our Closet Disco Queen Pot-Cast deals with legal adult cannabis use and is intended for entertainment purposes only for those 21 and olderVisit our Closet Disco Queen Pot-Cast merch store!Find us on Facebook and Green Coast RadioSound from Zapsplat.com,  https://quicksounds.com, 101soundboards.com #ToneTransfer

La barcelonesa Andrea Motis con 'Tan tranquil.la', 'You sent me flying' y 'Tudo é ilusão' de su disco 'Intimate'; los franceses de Toda Nova con 'Bossa novien', 'Elle et moi' y 'Amour amour' de su disco 'Vertige'; el brasileño Celso Fonseca y el italiano Tony Canto con 'Garota de Ipanema', 'Volare', 'Fotografía' -con la armónica de Gabriel Grossi- y 'Amara terra mia' del disco 'Jobim e Modugno' y la bostoniana Kat Gang con 'C´est si bon', 'Só danço samba', 'Dream a little dream of me' y 'Just friends' de su 'Bossa and Bordeaux'.Escuchar audio

One day before the release of her new album, Music, Fashion, Film, xcx joins Scott Lipps on SPIN Magazine's Lipps Service for an in-depth conversation about creativity, reinvention, and one of pop music's most influential careers. Charli discusses the inspiration behind Music, Fashion, Film, nearly walking away from music, working with A.G. Cook, growing up during the MySpace era, fashion, filmmaking, visual identity, Martin Scorsese, John Cale, Lou Reed, Andy Warhol, social media, the current state of rock, and much more. The episode concludes with Charli's Top 5 Underrated Films and Top 5 Charli xcx Songs. If you enjoy conversations with the world's biggest artists, subscribe and turn on notifications for new episodes every week. CHAPTERS 00:00 Intro 00:27 NYC 01:08 Intimate shows 02:29 Growing up (The Monkees, Bread, Britney Spears & Spice Girls) 03:34 MySpace, Uffie & Ed Banger 05:05 Building her own team 08:22 Albums that inspired her 11:26 Early music 12:08 The beginning 14:45 A.G. Cook 18:57 Music, Fashion, Film 19:15 Nearly quitting music 22:22 Album artwork 25:26 John Cale, Lou Reed & Andy Warhol 31:08 Marc Jacobs 32:34 Martin Scorsese 34:48 Music, Fashion, Film creative process 37:50 The future of music & rock 40:39 Visuals 42:03 Songwriting 44:45 David Cronenberg & legacy 47:55 Advice to young artists 50:10 Social media 51:55 Top 5 Underrated Films 56:15 Top 5 Charli xcx Songs #CharliXCX #MusicFashionFilm #LippsService #ScottLipps #SPIN #MusicPodcast #PopMusic #Interview Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Adam Wright welcomes Fr. David Skillman back to the studio for another conversation in our series on the Holy Spirit as outlined in St. John Paul II's encyclical "Dominum et Vivificantem" ("The Lord and Giver of Life"). This week Fr. Skillman highlights the passage on the Church as the Sacrament of Intimate Union with God. Adam takes a look at today's Gospel reading. Download the Covenant Network app today! Pray the Visual Rosary at VisualRosary.org For more information on Covenant Network, visit OurCatholicRadio.org

The News includes the latest on Tropical Storm Bertha, a woman who received "Intimate injuires" after rope swinging, and a 100-lb dog needing to be carried off a mountain. We then experienced some more audio issues on Twitch and YouTube, this time featuring Albert Breer. Greg then asks everyone if they care if NFL coaches start using ChatGPT to send out emails.

PSR Podcast is a listener supported outreach of Be Broken Ministries. Partner with us through giving at BeBroken.org/donate. Thank you for your support!----------In this episode, I welcome back Andrea Rogers, a Board Certified Life Coach specializing in intimate partner betrayal trauma. Andrea shares her powerful personal story of discovering her husband's double life after 14 years of marriage, which eventually led her into coaching work. We explore what intimate partner betrayal truly means, its devastating emotional and physical impacts—including PTSD-like symptoms—and why it's so isolating. Andrea also shares about the Intimate Partner Betrayal Awareness Day, observed annually on August 4th. This is a growing movement to bring visibility and community to those affected. To learn more about Andrea and her resources, visit FullyAliveCoachingLLC.com and IPBAwareness.org. Topics Covered in this Episode:Personal experience with intimate partner betrayal and its impact on relationships.Definition and understanding of intimate partner betrayal and betrayal trauma.Emotional and psychological effects of betrayal trauma, including symptoms similar to PTSD.The isolating nature of betrayal and societal misconceptions surrounding it.The establishment and significance of Intimate Partner Betrayal Awareness Day.Misconceptions about preventing betrayal and the need for specialized support.The importance of community and support systems for healing from betrayal trauma.Distinction between betrayal trauma and other forms of relational conflict.Strategies for healing and first steps for those experiencing betrayal.The role of friends and family in supporting individuals dealing with betrayal trauma.More Resources:An Ember of Light by Andrea AminahWives Care Groups (Online)40 Days of Healing for Wives (online course)Related Podcasts: Is There Hope After Divorce Due to Sexual Betrayal? Online Care Groups for Wives Facing Betrayal TraumaHealing from Sexual Trauma and Coercive Control in Relationships----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple and SpotifyFollow us on our Vimeo Channel.

Cold openWelcome to the Treatment Funhouse…First room. Guy in a jumpsuit, “We gotta strap ya in.” He waves at a chair. “Safety,” he says in a bored voice.So you sit. You really want… something… different in your miserable life.[Brief music]Suddenly he snaps manacles on your wrists. Then behind you he grabs a blowtorch…[music]IntroThis is AutisticAF Out Loud, Season 7, episode 1. Today, I find moments of joy… after some brutal ones.Like Leonard Cohen sang in Suzanne, “among the garbage and the flowers.”I'm Johnny Profane. Startled awake. Taking a new direction. And writing a neurodivergent autobiography… out loud.Content note: Mentions abuse, trauma, suicidality... and dark humor.Just one autistic elder's voice. Raw.3 fragments from my free archive, autisticaf.me… I'll tell you more at the break.[music]Welcome to the Treatment FunhouseBeing trapped in the medical model of autism for decades?Imagine an elaborate carnival funhouse… the kind that's a maze. You gotta find your way out. But…This one's got a horror theme.The sign outside… “23 Mirrored Rooms That Will Change Your Life… Forever!”Never saw that before.So you stand in the long wait line. That, naturally, doubles back on itself. Many times.Finally, you belly up to the barker's ticket window. Start to scan the price board.“125 bucks?” You cry out.“You wanna change yer life, kid? Whatchya think it would cost?”So you sigh. You think…You need… different. You fork over.First room. Guy in a jumpsuit, “We gotta strap ya in.” He waves at the chair. “Safety,” he says in a bored voice.So you sit. You really want… well, something… different in your miserable life.Suddenly, he snaps manacles on your wrists. Then behind you, he grabs a blowtorch.You see this scene reflected in all the mirrors. In detail. Enhanced by all your grisly memories.You protest. “What the actual fuck.”“Trust me. This is the latest research. Sure as hell gonna change your life.” That smile. Thin. Cold. Professional. “We got paying customers outside. Lined up. Waiting to get inside. You in… or out.”You reflect on your miserable life. You nod.Then he slowly, methodically works you over. A light burn here. Another there. Starting at your feet. Working upwards.You scream. You cry. You plead. You evade. You bargain. Not a word out of Jumpsuit Guy.And… the only way you can block out the terror reflected in those mirrors?Close your eyes…He finishes. He unshackles you. Helps you up as you tremble. Guides you efficiently to the door.“Next room. Room of Knives. Yer gonna love it,” he laughs.“Just 22 to go.” Leans in… conspiratorially. Whispers in my ear…“Wait til the Meds room. Everybody talks about the Meds Room.”Beat.“If you make it there.”musicInterludeOkay, then. A fun little… metaphor. Now… some dark reality. Family… and professionals… tossed off what I was going through in my late teens as “immaturity.” Something I'd age out of. Totally ignoring all the red danger flags of the coming disaster.Quick side note. Some folks wrote you couldn't read articles. Multiple platform problems… demands you subscribe… pestering friends, even if they used a“free” link.I heard ya . So, I built my free personal archive at autisticaf.me. No paywall. No ads to piss ya off. All free & shareable… on me.You'll find more pieces like this next one… there. — The Autistic Treatment Funhouse, Room of ExamsThey Called It Immaturity. They Missed Everything.Content note: This is the tough one I mentioned. With the brutal flowers.Look, first of all… This is not the beginning of a poor-me story.This is a story of how I found moments of joy… and darkness… in my autistic life. Like Leonard Cohen sang in Suzanne, “among the garbage and the flowers.”But I found dark humor... every where.1972 was a hell of a summer… Room 1I first sought a diagnosis at 19. Following suicide attempt #1.I was driving after dark. Which I wasn't supposed to do… new family rule.See, I'd damaged our car the week before, making a hasty turn into our driveway near Jumping Deer Road in Katonah. Hit the damn stone wall on the way in.This was Westchester County, NY. Local code only allowed a nano break between the 18th-Century stones guarding our yard. Colonial heritage or something… masking slave labor.I'm in the doghouse. With parents already skeptical about letting me go to college. Not “mature” enough.Yet, when the hood and fender are finally fixed? They drop me off on a muggy, hazy June night. Out in the boonies at the old Amawak Service Center on Route 202.“Pick it up and bring it home. No side stops.” Then they instruct me, “Be… careful.” Rolling their collective 4 eyes.I pull out, then wait. The light's gotta change at the 4-lane intersection with Route 35 before I can head home.The light turns green. I go into a weird space in my head. There's… there's some reason I shouldn't turn left… yet… But I watch myself shrug, flick my signal switch, and turn. Right into two lanes of accelerating traffic coming right at me.Don't remember much more. Just the red, don't-turn-yet-idiot arrow. Staring at me brightly… through the windshield that used to be there.I survived. That classic, white 1965 Mustang… didn't. Barely street legal, 271-horse V8 under the hood. Maybe the most collectible American car of all time.A hand-me-down gift to our family from my father's father. Who bragged, “I had to jew the dealer down from 5 grand,” back when he bought it new in '65. A lot of money then.Um, things got tense at home.“You are responsible for your own actions. You are the cause here.”Parental meeting time.“Uh, I don't know what happened.” I couldn't stand these “meetings.” So many in my childhood. This was maybe the worst of all.“I don't know. It… it... just happened.”Making my parents even more furious. These were avid Ayn Rand readers. And my grandfather? He slept beside an orderly nightstand. Mein Kampf tucked tightly in its tidy drawer. My dead father's voice echoes coldly in my mind still. “You are responsible for your own actions. You are the cause here.” But, I stumble on. Making things worse… in my way.“Something's wrong. I don't know what. I'm having horrible visions. Hitting people with the car as I drive by. Hitting their bodies… bones…” I trail off. Into stony silence, I say, “And now something weird happened. I think… I think… maybe I should see a doctor…”Next thing I know, I'm sitting in front of a Westchester County caseworker. Cuz my parents felt a psychologist or private therapist cost too much.I had no idea what I was feeling… much less why.The intake experience was horrific.I felt… badgered.She called it… delicately. “Maybe the accident looked like an attempt to… maybe… harm yourself?” But she continued with a sledgehammer.“I know you have a secret you want to tell me.” Rinse, repeat… Rinse, repeat…I wanted so badly to please her. But had no idea what I was feeling… much less why.Worse yet? There were things I didn't want to tell her. Darker than the physical or sexual abuse she was probably check-listing. Things a traumatized kid might do… himself.I never went back. I told my parents I was uncomfortable talking to her.My dad rocked back in his dark, maple, Early American dining room chair. “Fine. That's your choice.”He paused. Looking directly at my mother as he said to me, “I can see you won't speak to this counselor. I see no reason to look for another for you to talk to. Your decision.”And that was that.We were all dying for freedom.Finally at 63, a psychologist specializing in autism gave me another name, Alexithymia.He said a lot of autistics can know something is wrong. But not know what. And baptized me, Autism Spectrum Disorder… with a side of ADHD.2016 was a good year. A damn fine year.But 1972 was a summer from hell.The last US troops shipped home, fleeing Viet Nam. Palestinians massacred Israelis at the Olympics. My father died that August. The week after he molested me for the last time.We were all dying for freedom.[music]Cuz… if you don't know us… how ya gonna love us.InterludeOkay. Here's the last frag I toss… today. Let's end with joyful moments. Among the dark. Let's end with survival.See, I'm giving you these fragments of my life…Cuz… if you don't know us… how ya gonna love us.And this is part of me, too…[music]I Don't Think I Had a “Personality” as a KidI was busy finding Infinity in a burnt-off ant leg…This one brings home the stakes.The moments of joy along the way… that drew a line under what could have been. Not if they fixed me. But maybe what all of our children could be.If we just listen to them. And support what they say they need.“What are you doing…?”My mother's voice was sharp.I'm lying spreadeagled on the backyard grass, face down.“I've called you three times.” Annoyed. “WHAT are you doing…?”I don't know it in Second Grade… But I have difficulties shifting attention when I'm lost in thought…I try to focus my ears…Then think back,review my short-term memory,and replay the last few moments.Trying to hear and translate anything she might have said while I'm in my private thought bubble…Already at 7, this process of “rehearsing” or “rewinding the tape” to interpret what's going on? It's an automatic, constant routine when I'm around… well, people.Checking for verbal mistakes, missed cues… Just trying to understand, what's going on…?So I'm still trying to sort it out,choose words carefully to explain,clearing my throat,moving my sleeping tongue,loosening my jaw,getting ready to speak…“HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”“Umm… Nothing…?” Close as I come to a lie at that age.I've been lying in the grass for an hour or so, exploring with my new magnifying glass.See, there was this great hobby shop in Johnson City. It had all kinds of cool science “toys.” And I had saved my 50-cent allowance for weeks to buy a “Real, hand-held, magnifying glass  —  made with ALL-METAL handle!!”I was entranced.Examining grass leaves, dew drops, and…Ants.Dozens of ants. One after another.Legs.Antennae.Mandibles.Eyes.Guiltily burning off the occasional leg with focused sunlight…Endless fascination…I was in the flow…“Okay. Whatever you are doing…” I wait for the command I know will end my timeless bliss… “Stop doing it. It's time for lunch.”I sigh. Roll over.And. Trudge. In.Hardly sounds like abuse, right…..??Imagine that last, delicious dream you're enjoying as you drowse in a warm snuggly bed… when you don't have to get up…My autistic joys are hard to explain to another person.Pretty much ANY non-autistic person.And trying to… drags me into Deep Philosophical Waters…Imagine that last, delicious dream you're enjoying as you drowse in a warm snuggly bed on a lazy Saturday morning when you don't have to get up…And someone screams, “GET UP!”Eyes pop open. Instantly. You're so startled, for a minute… you have no idea where you are, what you're doing, the time of day, the season…Now… imagine that… if you can…Every. Damn. Day. Many, many, MANY times a day… Every single day of your childhood.Torture.Being startled out of the flow? It's like that.Capisce? Ya dig? Feel me?That's as close as I can think of to explain my moments of autistic flow.Or, better yet, my autistic joys.That same joy you seeon an autistic kid's faceas he dances endlesslyin a sprinkler in the sun…If I had to guess, this is precisely what Being in the Moment, in the Now, maybe even Zen Satori…Mean.Gradually as I aged, these blissful moments became fewer and fewer…Now, that's all preamble to what I really wanna talk about…Here's the deal on Flow…I think that's where I spent most of my time as a young kid.When I wasn't interacting with family, a few schoolmates, parents, one teacher a year… the few humans I let into my life back then.And that time alone… Endlessly exploring, learning, feeling, being… was…Wordless delight.Gradually as I aged, these blissful moments became fewer and fewer… further and further and further apart… nearly gone…First, I was forced into a school system… That I was clearly not wired for.Rigid.Lockstep.Regimented.Regulated.BORING.No Free Time.To simply… explore.Later, of course, it got MUCH worse. Jobs, relationships, finances… Life in Modern Adult America.Like when I founded Unix World magazine. I was so high on the concept and the joy of process… My inner vision won us awards our first year. Western Publishing Association Best New Publication and Best Issue. Beating out Macworld and PC World.Yeah. We won awards. A couple months after I was fired from my own mag. Fired because… in my autistic mind… the game was Create the Most Amazing Publication… Ever.But the whole time, the world was shouting that it was Make the Most Money You Can… Right Now.Snake eyes. I lost.My natural state, left alone to my own devices? Wandering from moment to moment of… fascination.Now, I have some personal speculation to get off my chest.First… I don't think I had a native personality when I was a kid…At least not as bell-curve average humans understand a personality.My natural state, left alone to my own devices? Wandering from moment to moment of fascination. No motivations. No intentions. No (verbal) thought…So… I was either happy exploring in the fields… or with my chemistry set in the basement… or catching polliwogs in Spring pools…Or I was forced to don my “personality.”In other words,the language,facial expressions,body language,polite responses,social lies,and predictable actionsthat humans think of as “personality”…and that social contact demands.Which is so natural for most humans, they aren't even aware of it.Even though they must have it from me… to feel safe.But, for me, “personality” was likebeing dragged out of my comfy pajamas,forced intothe worst, most cumbersome, restrictive, awkward, embarrassing winter coat,ear muffs,muffler,heavy snow boots,and mittensyour mother ever stuffed you intoto shove you onto that bus to kindergarten…And “personality” still is suffocating. Today. In my 70s. Ten years after diagnosed as autistic and ADHD.Especially, “fun times”… They're the real killers.Parties.Intimate conversations…Shudder... Family holidays? So nightmarish, I wrote the 7-page narrative poem sneaking my mother's creepy g-d on high.These are all times I must adopt my “personality.” You know, to survive. No matter how much “fun” they're supposed to be.What pros call “masking”? Really nothing more than exhausting habits of behavior & speech. That I must shroud myself in. Like an embalmed mummy. Just so it's easy for other humans… to feel “comfortable” around me.Not an essential Self. Just, ya know, “personality.”Certainly not me. Nothing comfortable about it.I'm going to hazard a guess.Which may be narcissistic delusion… Flow seems awfully close to what the Buddha described as experiencing “no-self” vs. the “conditioned mind.”From at least age 2 on, I clearly remember lucid dreaming and long periods of time spent without verbal thought of any kind. Just perceiving, in awe and wonder…EVERYTHING.Until I had to interact with humans. Any humans. Even those I was required… to “love.”And donning the “personality”? The joy collapsed. Fast as a quantum waveform when you try to measure it. Not into pain…Collapsing into an all-absorbing effort.Intellectualizing every word,gesture,tone of voice of my own…Then interpreting all those of each and every human I was with at the time…and THEN determining precisely the right word,tone of voice,facial expression,and body attitude to project back…all at the same timeTo avoid being in trouble.Because I was… Bad.And I had to protect everyone around me from that.Every. Single. Second…And even at a young age, a growing sense of the need to protect others…From me.Because I was different. Because I hurt people without understanding. Because I acted as if I were “arrogant”… etc., etc.Like two divorces. Cuz I could be amazing for 3 to 6 months. Caring. Fun as hell. Then fall into deep depressions and work burnouts. Cuz I couldn't handle that much intimacy. Hell, that much time alone with another human…Because I was… Bad.And I had to protect everyone around me from that.Every. Single. Second… That I am with another human.Except very young children. And of course, animals… Since I was… 4 years old.Now since diagnosis, I found a few tricks.In 2019 when I first started writing about my autism, I was all about lists. Trying to “help” others. Took me a year or two to realize we are… every one of us autists… different. Different lives. Different needs and goals. Different survival skills.So I'm only an “expert” on my own life. Even if I am the only expert on that there is.Your mileage certainly will vary.But for me? My autistic life is not about “getting better.” Or fixing me. It's about knowing who I truly am. And what I truly need. Doing what I can to meet those needs.Then being… me.So I moved to the Country…Living in the trailer across the courtyardFrom my third, loving wifeWhere I can reduce sensory overload.Reduce the number of humans I talk with To only folks I feel comfortable around.And stopped failing at jobs I was never built to do.But I… now… can pursue those things that have brought me joy since childhood.Spending unstructured, unmeasured time on any of my passions…walking in the wildest Nature I have access to,baking bread,fermenting pickles,gardening,deep-focus while replaying a favorite movie… that seventh time,illustrating,writing,playing music,researching world events….so, so many others.When I pursue a “special interest”… alone? Sometimes it's nearly orgasmic… In fact, I've redefined my understanding of my passions.They're not a forbidden pleasure. A shameful quirk. Something I “waste time on” when there's nothing more important to do.They are my gateway to Bliss, Satori, Oneness… Maybe even whatever God is… or Isn't…I'm not talking toxic positivity. My autistic joys aren't some advanced spiritual state I've achieved in my 70s. And now, suddenly… I'm here to tell you how to make everything okay. And talk you into buying your 5th NEW self-help system on the way out the door.But my joys are moments of love and happiness sprinkled through most of my days. Between meltdowns and burnouts. And some average life.They are my reason for Being.There are just NOT 7 Easy Things that Successful Autistics Do…That Will Change My Life Forever.There's just living complex… and in the end… wild autistic life.being old & autistic ain't so bad.losing inhibitions.some of which protected me from…Life.freedom turns out to be pain…and joy…in superposition.until maybe they annihilate you.Notes from the bardobefore the bardoI learned a lot that Spring afternoon on the lawn in Johnson City.I saw Infinity in a burnt-off ant leg.And, eventually… I went for it.[music]OutroNow you know. So... there ya go.This project is consuming me. In that good, auDHD passionate way. Cuz your response keeps me going.If it meant something to you… I bet you know someone else it will mean something to. Share it.Everything's free at autisticaf.me. For everyone. On me.Stay weird.Stay fierce.Stay alive. * If this 3 fragments grabbed you… binge them all in order here: The Book: Frag by Frag.Click to get the next frag in your inbox free. Plus a PDF of my chapbook. To support my work, consider a paid subscription.These fragments are from my upcoming autobiography, Autistic Noir: My Life is My Art, arriving Fall 2026.I'm building a book out loud. Fragment by fragment. Just like I lived it.The Next ActDon't trust a corporate algorithm's decision about whether you get to see the next excerpt or not.Join my Substack for free… and the next fragment comes straight to your inbox. And you get a free digital download of my complete poetry chapbook.* Unlock the next act for free.Why I Write My AutobiographyI'm only an expert on my own life. Born 1953, diagnosed at 63. Your mileage will vary.Individual minority voices speaking truth out loud? They build bridges to mainstream readers. Think Malcolm X. Think Maya Angelou, Think Janet Mock's Redefining Realness.This Fall, I hope to deliver that kind of impact, that power with My Autistic Life is My Art. For our neurodivergent community.Since 2019 I've published a quarter of a million words. Over half the size of the Lord of the Rings trilogy.Gotta be a pony somewhere in that shit. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit johnnyprofaneknapp.substack.com/subscribe

The hall pass begins as a simple deal. One night. Clear boundaries. As spiritual awareness grows, trauma patterns in partners stand out sharply. The evolved person shifts to observer mode and stops participating in the cycles. This creates distance. The work remains unfinished on both sides. Pressure builds. Triangulation through the hall pass offers relief without demanding full integration. It diffuses intensity while the deeper alignment catches up. Realism shows the ego and fear underneath. Spiritual clarity sees the energy scatter. Most passes do not close the gap. They manage symptoms until the real repair happens or the container breaks. Revised Radical Questions (fresh set reflecting this insight): 1. How does your spiritual growth make ordinary relationship patterns feel heavier?

The hall pass begins as a simple deal. One night. Clear boundaries. As spiritual awareness grows, trauma patterns in partners stand out sharply. The evolved person shifts to observer mode and stops participating in the cycles. This creates distance. The work remains unfinished on both sides. Pressure builds. Triangulation through the hall pass offers relief without demanding full integration. It diffuses intensity while the deeper alignment catches up. Realism shows the ego and fear underneath. Spiritual clarity sees the energy scatter. Most passes do not close the gap. They manage symptoms until the real repair happens or the container breaks. Revised Radical Questions (fresh set reflecting this insight): 1. How does your spiritual growth make ordinary relationship patterns feel heavier?

The intimate hall pass grows out of a verdict the nervous system reached long ago. One person cannot possibly carry the full weight of another's needs. From that verdict comes the agreement. One night. One third body. Official clearance. The counterintuitive truth sits underneath. The current partner has not failed at satiation. They have succeeded at exposure. They have watched the exact moments your signal thins. They carry the accumulated memory of when the exiled parts rise and get quickly managed. That sustained witness turns the relationship into a threat to the concealment strategy. The hall pass removes the threat. It routes the hunger to someone whose eyes have not yet cataloged your particular map. The new person receives the version you still control. The body discharges. Relief registers as peace. This arrangement never expands the original room. It preserves the wound's right to remain partially hidden. Revelation was always the actual point of the bond. The pass interrupts that point by importing a witness who lacks the shared history to see past the performance. The peace that follows is real but narrow. It comes from completion without the difficult labor of staying inside the interval where the full self stands exposed. The body signals the move before the conversation starts. Tension gathers. The fantasy arrives. One night elsewhere will quiet this pressure. The calculation repeats an old kata. It chooses fresh territory over the harder work of turning the ground already occupied. Radical questions meet the body where it tightens. What exact sensation moves through you when the idea of granting or taking the pass first appears. Which hidden dimension does the steady partner keep bringing forward. How does the outsider's inexperience with your history become the main advantage. What ongoing interior demand does the short peace let you sidestep. If the relationship exists to reveal what lives inside why recruit a witness who sees less. The gate occupies that exact moment of discomfort. Leaving the room only extends the distance you eventually have to travel back. Staying present with what has already been seen begins the rewiring that makes real satiation possible.

The intimate hall pass grows out of a verdict the nervous system reached long ago. One person cannot possibly carry the full weight of another's needs. From that verdict comes the agreement. One night. One third body. Official clearance. The counterintuitive truth sits underneath. The current partner has not failed at satiation. They have succeeded at exposure. They have watched the exact moments your signal thins. They carry the accumulated memory of when the exiled parts rise and get quickly managed. That sustained witness turns the relationship into a threat to the concealment strategy. The hall pass removes the threat. It routes the hunger to someone whose eyes have not yet cataloged your particular map. The new person receives the version you still control. The body discharges. Relief registers as peace. This arrangement never expands the original room. It preserves the wound's right to remain partially hidden. Revelation was always the actual point of the bond. The pass interrupts that point by importing a witness who lacks the shared history to see past the performance. The peace that follows is real but narrow. It comes from completion without the difficult labor of staying inside the interval where the full self stands exposed. The body signals the move before the conversation starts. Tension gathers. The fantasy arrives. One night elsewhere will quiet this pressure. The calculation repeats an old kata. It chooses fresh territory over the harder work of turning the ground already occupied. Radical questions meet the body where it tightens. What exact sensation moves through you when the idea of granting or taking the pass first appears. Which hidden dimension does the steady partner keep bringing forward. How does the outsider's inexperience with your history become the main advantage. What ongoing interior demand does the short peace let you sidestep. If the relationship exists to reveal what lives inside why recruit a witness who sees less. The gate occupies that exact moment of discomfort. Leaving the room only extends the distance you eventually have to travel back. Staying present with what has already been seen begins the rewiring that makes real satiation possible.

COULD A RELATIONSHIP BE YOUR TICKET OUT OF HELL… OUT OF HERE? What if the relationship you keep trying to save exists to strip bare and destroy the performative version of yourself that keeps calling superficial captivity love? Human beings built temples and spiritual systems in pursuit of liberation. Then we entered intimate relationships and treated the spiritual practice available as a comfort machine. Earth is the campus. Relationship is the curriculum. Relating is the practice. Your partner reaches places no sermon can reach. Their freedom exposes your attachment. Their difference threatens the identity built around being needed, chosen, desired, or reassured. The argument you keep trying to win may be the lesson your consciousness keeps refusing to learn. Intimate hell becomes the preferred model because it feels familiar. Clinicians may call it reenactment. Hawkins may call it an attractor field. The language changes. The return continues. The psyche keeps choosing the emotional climate it already knows how to survive. Rejection feels like chemistry. Distance feels like mystery. Control feels like care. Anxiety feels like passion. Performance feels like love. The partner becomes supply. You provide my peace. You regulate my worth. You quiet my fear. You prove that I matter. I call you perfect while you continue feeding the wound whose appetite never ends. That appetite remains endless because the wound has been starved from within. Its missing nourishment is direct, nonjudgmental observation: seeing fear, shame, grief, rage, need, and jealousy without condemnation, verdict, or exile. Integration asks us to offer inwardly what we keep demanding outwardly. We avoid that work. So intimacy becomes a supply chain. Giving stays conditional upon receiving. The pedestal holds whoever keeps the wound fed. When the supply weakens, the “perfect partner” becomes cold, selfish, or changed. Unconditional love breaks the loop. It allows truth without punishment, closeness without ownership, care without self-erasure, difference without exile, and freedom without abandonment. It can set boundaries, remove access, or end the relationship without stripping either person of human worth. The deepest question reaches beyond staying together: Can two human beings stop employing each other to manage their wounds long enough to discover whether love remains? Your partner cannot carry you out of hell. Relationship may reveal why you keep choosing it.

COULD A RELATIONSHIP BE YOUR TICKET OUT OF HELL… OUT OF HERE? What if the relationship you keep trying to save exists to strip bare and destroy the performative version of yourself that keeps calling superficial captivity love? Human beings built temples and spiritual systems in pursuit of liberation. Then we entered intimate relationships and treated the spiritual practice available as a comfort machine. Earth is the campus. Relationship is the curriculum. Relating is the practice. Your partner reaches places no sermon can reach. Their freedom exposes your attachment. Their difference threatens the identity built around being needed, chosen, desired, or reassured. The argument you keep trying to win may be the lesson your consciousness keeps refusing to learn. Intimate hell becomes the preferred model because it feels familiar. Clinicians may call it reenactment. Hawkins may call it an attractor field. The language changes. The return continues. The psyche keeps choosing the emotional climate it already knows how to survive. Rejection feels like chemistry. Distance feels like mystery. Control feels like care. Anxiety feels like passion. Performance feels like love. The partner becomes supply. You provide my peace. You regulate my worth. You quiet my fear. You prove that I matter. I call you perfect while you continue feeding the wound whose appetite never ends. That appetite remains endless because the wound has been starved from within. Its missing nourishment is direct, nonjudgmental observation: seeing fear, shame, grief, rage, need, and jealousy without condemnation, verdict, or exile. Integration asks us to offer inwardly what we keep demanding outwardly. We avoid that work. So intimacy becomes a supply chain. Giving stays conditional upon receiving. The pedestal holds whoever keeps the wound fed. When the supply weakens, the “perfect partner” becomes cold, selfish, or changed. Unconditional love breaks the loop. It allows truth without punishment, closeness without ownership, care without self-erasure, difference without exile, and freedom without abandonment. It can set boundaries, remove access, or end the relationship without stripping either person of human worth. The deepest question reaches beyond staying together: Can two human beings stop employing each other to manage their wounds long enough to discover whether love remains? Your partner cannot carry you out of hell. Relationship may reveal why you keep choosing it.

Why do we love who we love? Why do we stay in unfulfilling relationships, and stray from rewarding ones? Is it ever a good idea to open a relationship? And why do some long-time couples crash and burn while others stay madly in love? Evolutionary biologist, author, and Executive Director of the world-renowned Kinsey Institute, Dr. Justin Garcia examines these questions and more in this conversation on modern mating. * In this episode Dr. Garcia is joined by Dr. Christopher Walling, chair of the Research Psychology program at CIIS, for an illuminating conversation on the science of love and sex. They discuss Dr. Garcia's book The Intimate Animal, and the lifecycle of a romantic relationship, from the thrill of first attraction to the devotion that can last decades. Dr. Garcia reveals that the need for intimacy, even more than sex drive, is key to our species' survival and flourishing. But therein lies the challenge. We evolved for social monogamy but not for sexual monogamy, yet these impulses are often at odds. Understanding this tension is the key to aligning our romantic choices with our true desires. * This episode was recorded during a live online event on March 12th 2026. You can also watch it on the CIIS Public Programs YouTube channel. A transcript is available at ciis.edu/podcast. To find out more about CIIS and public programs like this one, visit our website ciis.edu and connect with us on Instagram @ciispubprograms. * Some podcast apps may not display links from our show notes properly, so we have included a list of links below. * We hope that each episode of our podcast provides opportunities for growth, and that our listeners will use them as a starting point for further introspection. Many of the topics discussed on our podcast have the potential to bring up feelings and emotional responses. If you or someone you know is in need of mental health care and support, here are some resources to find immediate help and future healing: * -Visit 988lifeline.org or text, call, or chat with The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by dialing 988 from anywhere in the U.S. to be connected immediately with a trained counselor. Please note that 988 staff are required to take all action necessary to secure the safety of a caller and initiate emergency response with or without the caller's consent if they are unwilling or unable to take action on their own behalf. * -Visit thrivelifeline.org or text “THRIVE” to begin a conversation with a THRIVE Lifeline crisis responder 24/7/365, from anywhere: +1.313.662.8209. This confidential text line is available for individuals 18+ and is staffed by people in STEMM with marginalized identities. * -Visit translifeline.org or call (877) 565-8860 in the U.S. or (877) 330-6366 in Canada to learn more and contact Trans Lifeline, who provides trans peer support divested from police. * -Visit ciis.edu/ciis-in-the-world/counseling-clinics to learn more and schedule counseling sessions at one of our centers. * -Find information about additional global helplines at befrienders.org. * LINKS * Podcast Transcripts: https://www.ciis.edu/podcast * California Institute of Integral Studies (CIIS) Website: https://www.ciis.edu/ * CIIS Public Programs YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/ciispublicprograms * CIIS Public Programs Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ciispubprograms/ * Mental Health Care and Support Resources: https://988lifeline.org/ https://thrivelifeline.org/ https://translifeline.org/ https://www.ciis.edu/ciis-in-the-world/counseling-clinics https://befrienders.org/

 In this deeply personal conversation on Intimate Conversations with Men, Coach Alex VanHouten joins Elena for an honest discussion about pain, faith, fatherhood, masculinity, suffering, and the body as a gift to steward.Alex shares how living with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome—a painful genetic disorder affecting collagen, joints, connective tissue, and digestion—shaped his path as an exercise scientist and faith-based health coach. Rather than seeing pain only as an enemy, Alex explains how pain can become a teacher, a signal, and even a doorway into courage, endurance, and purpose.Together, Alex and Elena explore:How pain can function as feedback rather than failureWhy men often hide pain, weakness, or needThe connection between pain, identity, and self-worthWhy endurance and courage are essential for healingHow fathers help boys learn to face challenge and difficultyWhy safe play, sport, and male mentorship matter for boysThe story behind Faithful FitnessHow faith and rationality work together in health and fitnessWhy the body is a gift to steward—not a problem to escapeWhat to do when suffering feels overwhelmingWhy you are valuable, loved, and not done yetThis conversation also touches on grief, suicide, depression, chronic illness, and the importance of speaking the truth about pain instead of carrying it alone.If you have ever felt broken, limited, discouraged, or unsure whether your body can still become stronger, this episode is for you.You are not done yet.Be faithful.God is not done with you.Timestamps00:00 – Welcome to Intimate Conversations with Men02:04 – Meet Coach Alex VanHouten02:52 – Living With Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome04:50 – How Pain Became a Teacher06:40 – Pain as Feedback, Not Failure07:31 – Endurance and Courage09:35 – Helping Children Face Pain Without Fear12:19 – What Adults Should Do When Pain Shows Up14:38 – Deciding How to Face Pain Today17:34 – Choosing Your Emotional Posture Toward Pain18:52 – Why Men Struggle to Be Seen in Pain20:56 – Coaching Men and Women Differently24:08 – How Fathers Help Boys Face Challenge26:33 – What Kickboxing Taught Alex About Masculinity29:23 – Why Boys Need Safe Difficulty32:08 – Advice for Mothers Raising Boys35:00 – Why Alex Created Faithful Fitness36:40 – Belief, Diabetes, Cookies, and Self-Sabotage38:48 – Why Pleasure Can Hide Pain39:27 – Faith, Science, and Coaching People From Different Backgrounds42:00 – Helping People With Physical Challenges Begin Again45:02 – Why Compassion Matters in Coaching47:48 – “You're Not Done Yet”49:23 – Alex Shares About Losing His Brother52:06 – Why Naming Pain Reduces Its Power55:51 – Where to Find Faithful Fitness58:02 – Rapid Fire Questions01:07:06 – Closing PrayerCheck out Christian Workout/Running music by Faithful Fitness:

What if the peace and presence you long for is already here—closer than you imagine? In this guided meditation, we explore the practice of awakening an intimate presence with life as it is. Through mindful awareness of the body, breath, heart, and senses, we gently release habitual striving and return to the living reality of this moment. As we soften into a receptive awareness, we discover a natural spaciousness that can hold whatever arises with kindness and ease. This meditation invites you to: ✨ Relax into embodied awareness and presence ✨ Cultivate a gentle, friendly attention toward your inner experience ✨ Sense the aliveness of the body from the inside out ✨ Rest in the stillness and openness of awareness itself ✨ Deepen trust in the loving presence that is your true nature Whether you're new to meditation or a longtime practitioner, this practice offers a pathway home—to the intimacy, peace, and awake heart that are always here. Our introduction music is from "Opening" by Adrienne Torf, © 2025 ABT Music

After making seven seasons of the CBBC series, Malory Towers, it's already abundantly clear that Ella Bright is brimming with talent and experience, but Prime Video's Off Campus is bound to send her star soaring in a significant way. Based on the hugely popular book series by Elle Kennedy, Off Campus Season 1 puts the spotlight on the main characters of the first novel, The Deal. Garrett Graham (Belmont Cameli) is Briar University's impossibly popular star hockey player who can get just about any girl he wants. Bright's Hannah Wells, on the other hand, is a quiet songwriter who tends to keep clear of the college party scene. Not a likely pair. Plus, Hannah has a crush on someone else.When Garrett struggles with his philosophy class, he opts to turn to a top student for help, Hannah, and the two strike up a deal; she'll help him with his classwork and he'll help her get who she thinks is the guy of her dreams, Josh Heuston's Justin. However, the longer they fake date in an effort to make Justin jealous, the more evident it becomes that they're actually the perfect fit for one another. In the end, Garrett and Hannah fall for each other, and the viewer falls for them as a couple.The trouble is, Season 2 of Off Campus is based on the second book of Kennedy's series, and that book, The Mistake, has different main characters. Does that mean we'll get a lot less Hannah and Garrett in Off Campus Season 2? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jared Brady and Jonathan Singletary sit down to talk about fatherhood, inheritance, and the difference between intention and what's already in the body. Jonathan Singletary is a Los Angeles-based musician, songwriter, and founder of Piano & Prayer, a musical meditation and community gathering practice featured in the LA Times that has grown into a meaningful spiritual presence for thousands of people. Jared Brady is a creative director, actor, and co-founder of Shared Entertainment. Both men are in the middle of the work. Jonathan reaches for his daughter on instinct before the decision clears his mind. Jared watches his father's disappointment move across his own face and recognizes it. Neither of them is reporting from a solved place — they're two fathers who love their kids, who came from fathers they love, and who are sitting with the uncomfortable truth that some of what they're trying not to repeat is already running underneath everything. What holds this conversation together is a question Jared names explicitly: when you strip away the edited version of yourself, what voice are you actually parenting from? This episode earns its warmth by being honest first — about cost, about inheritance, and about the grace it takes to extend that same grace back to your own father. This one is for anyone who is actively trying to parent differently than they were parented, and discovering that the work is less about what you know and more about what you notice. ———————— Show some love on Daddy Day with our sponsor Arya! Go to http://arya.fyi/shan and use code DADDY10 ;) LOVERS! Get 15% off OneSkin with the code LOVERSBYSHAN at https://www.oneskin.co/LOVERSBYSHAN  #oneskinpod Showing love to our sponsor Biologica. Take their Quick Hormonal Life Stage Quiz to find the formula that's right for you, and get up to 32% on your purchase: https://biologica.com/lovers Lots of love to our sponsor, Quince. Go to quince.com/lovers for FREE shipping and 365-day returns. ———————— Follow Jonathan Singletary Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jonathansingletary Website: https://www.jonathansingletary.com Piano & Prayer: https://www.jonathansingletary.com/piano-and-prayer/patreon Follow Jared Brady → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enjoyjaredbrady Want more LOVERS? Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Gruber of Daring Fireball joins the MacBreak Weekly panel this week! A deep dive into Apple's new Siri following WWDC. Why Apple Intelligence & the new Siri is not coming to the EU initially later this year. And could the iPhone Ultra's launch be delayed this year? Private Cloud Compute Severely Limited for Third Party Devs. The future of Siri, or: why private inference isn't private enough. I tried Siri AI, and so far it actually works. How much Gemini is really inside Siri AI? The EU's DMA Folly. Reports of iPhone Ultra launch delays are 'false,' says leaker. Apple Vision Pro helped Disney re-engineer a classic EPCOT ride. Under-16 social media ban announced by UK government. Fox to Buy Roku Streaming Service in $25 Billion Deal. Picks of the Week Andy's Pick: Google Earth Flight Simulator for the Web John's Pick: Hovercraft Christina's Pick: Parachute Backup Hosts: Leo Laporte, Andy Ihnatko, and Christina Warren Guest: John Gruber Download or subscribe to MacBreak Weekly at https://twit.tv/shows/macbreak-weekly. Join Club TWiT for Ad-Free Podcasts! Support what you love and get ad-free audio and video feeds, a members-only Discord, and exclusive content. Join today: https://twit.tv/clubtwit Sponsors: zocdoc.com/macbreak hipebl.ai