The Family First Podcast

Scars. We all have them, whether they are the time we fell off our bike when we were young or the emotional ones we carry with us as an adult. Every scar has a story! On today's show, we will hear from former NFL player Devon Still, and how his life has been a journey from one scar to the next. The post #143: How to Overcome Obstacles in Life with Faith appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

How many of us struggle with trust? I know I do. Sometimes you just have to persevere. But it can still be hard to believe what you cannot see. Trust is something I have to work on daily. I am always up for a conversation that is going to inspire me to trust and persevere even when I don't know the outcome. That is why I was excited to have this discussion with NFL quarterback Case Keenum The post #142: What I Learned about Perseverance and Trust from Case Keenum appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

What is your lifelong dream? Is it to be the parent of a star athlete or have your own business? Whatever it is, having a dream energizes you (even on Monday mornings) as you passionately drive closer and closer to reaching it. Unfortunately, not all dreams happen. When a dream dies, it can be devastating. What can you do to get over the slump when you fail and find a new goal to pursue? The post #141: 4 Things to Do When You've Failed appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Based on the incredible true-life story that inspired the beloved, chart topping song, I Can Only Imagine is a song that brings ultimate hope to so many often in the midst of life's most challenging moments.  Amazingly, the song was written in mere minutes by MercyMe lead singer Bart Millard.  On today's show we have the privilege of talking to Bart and how those lyrics in reality, took a lifetime to craft. I Can Only Imagine is in theaters March 16th! The post #140: There's More to the Song, “I Can Only Imagine” appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

For centuries one story has touched the lives of people across the world. This holiday season you're invited to discover the story of the first Christmas from an entirely new perspective, and today on our show we have DeVon Franklin, one of the executive producers of the new movie The STAR in theaters November 10th. The post #139: The Star with DeVon Franklin (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

The great thing about integrity is that it is truly no respecter of position or wealth or race or gender.  It is not determined by shifting circumstances, cultural dynamics, or what you've previously achieved.  From the moment you are born, you –and you alone-determine whether you will be a person of integrity.  Integrity does not come in degrees-low, medium, or high.  You either have integrity or you don't.” The post #138: Every Man's Bible with Tony Dungy appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

When my daughters were young, it was easy to be their hero. All I had to do was carry them around the house on my shoulders, read them their favorite story, or play with them in the yard. But as my daughters have grown up, I've found that my relationships with them aren't so simple. Between school and friends and boys, things have become way more complicated. I don't know about you, but I'm ready to get back on track in my relationships with my daughters. So join me on today's show as we share 5 ways to be a hero to your daughter. The post #048: 5 Ways to Be Your Daughter's Hero (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Good conversations lead to connection and intimacy. The best way to facilitate a good conversation is to ask great questions. Whether you feel like you know your spouse well or not, there are questions that will be helpful. The spouse who becomes an expert in the art of asking questions is the spouse who will win their spouse's heart. Susan and I will be going through ten questions to ask your spouse every year (or more often if you'd like). The post #137: 10 Questions to Ask Your Spouse Every Year appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Pornography is a beast that kills – kills the soul and ravages relationships. No one is immune to pornography. Everywhere you turn, it's becoming more and more available. At the same time, men are becoming less and less aware of its harmful nature and its lasting impacts. It's an addiction that squelches intimacy. Intimacy takes an investment of time and energy, while pornography is a way to manufacture cheap, fleeting thrills instantaneously. Those manufactured feelings begin to replace actual intimacy with a spouse, even when a couple watches it together. Meanwhile it makes a wife feel insecure and betrayed The post #136: 5 Ways to Break Free from the Pornography Trap appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

If someone were to ask you the question: What is the key to intimacy in a marriage? What answers do you think you'll receive? I can imagine a lot of words that might be racing through your mind. Sexual compatibility. Time. Romance. Open Communication. Compromise. Forgiveness. Kindness. All of those are good answers, but on today's show, Susan and I would like to suggest that there's a strong case to be made that TRUST is an important key that unlocks the door to emotional and physical intimacy in marriage. Trust is an essential ingredient in the two of you becoming one flesh. In List 5 of our new books, Lists to Love by for Busy Husbands and Lists to Love by for Busy Wives, we mention “If trust is the door to intimacy, then there are three keys to opening that door.” The post #135: Trust: The Key to Unlock Intimacy in Marriage appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

NFL athlete and Super Bowl champion Benjamin Watson knows a thing or two about big games. But he says the biggest game in life—parenting, specifically fatherhood—is one for which there is no playbook. Watson shares, "I could find clearer direction for putting together a baby swing than for taking care of a newborn child,”. His new book, The New Dad's Playbook: Gearing Up for the Biggest Game of Your Life solves this problem by sharing parenting tips, wisdom and practical advice for new dads. The post #134: The New Dad's Playbook with Benjamin Watson (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

What is the opposite of love? If you said hate, well, I hate to disagree with you, but I'm convinced that the opposite of love is really selfishness. And in marriage, selfishness often makes you the worst threat to your marriage and can become the root cause of your marriage problems. The post #133: Is This the Root Cause of Your Marriage Problems? (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

You and your spouse are allies, not enemies. We must fight for our marriage because we love. We must fight for who we love. We must make war to make love last in marriage. Make war against those things that could divide our union. Fight for those things that will protect and preserve our union. Make love our highest priority as we pursue a selfless, sacrificial, and more perfect union. Here are 4 ways to fight for your marriage The post #132: 4 Ways to Fight for Your Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

When I got married…I didn't expect conflict, financial pressures, or challenges with children. I always thought the tough part about marriage was finding the right girl. I thought that once I found her, being married was the easy part. When I said my vows I EXPECTED it would always be better. I never EXPECTED that there would be a worse. And there was… The post #131: You Married for Better, but What about for Worse? (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Busyness is a thief that steals meaningful time and lasting memories. Creating a relationship bucket list will be helpful; it will work in all phases of your life and all relationships. Being INTENTIONAL is the key to having a strong relationship bucket list. The post #130: Why You Need a Relationship Bucket List (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Expectations: It's a huge word in marriage and something that many couples, ourselves included, struggle over. We oftentimes have unfair and unrealistic expectations when we go into marriage or even throughout our marriage. When we were writing our two new books Lists to Love By for Busy Husbands and Lists to Love By for Busy Wives, we found that this was a common denominator that was present in many of the historic blogs as well as current blog posts. People were looking for what should I expect from my husband, what should I expect from my wife, and what should I expect from our marriage. Expectations in marriage could be the biggest threat to your relationship The post #129 Unfair Expectations You May Have of Your Spouse (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

It's been said that we should never say never in our marriage and we should never use the word always, because, usually, they are unhelpful in navigating through issues or through conflict, but today we are going to talk about things you should always do in your marriage or that you should never do in your marriage. This is a list from our Lists to Love By for Busy Husbands and Lists to Love By for Busy Wives books, and it talks about 7 Must Do's and Don'ts for Your Marriage. The post #128: 7 Must Do's and Don'ts for Your Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Today we have an exciting show because we are going to be talking about things that spouses wish the other knew. In List #8 of our newly released books, Lists to Love By for Busy Husbands and Lists to Love By for Busy Wives we have things wives wish husbands knew and husbands wish wives knew. We wish for our spouses to know our heart. We both learned that knowing what your spouse desires is key to investing your time wisely and getting the greatest return for your marriage. We will share a few of those today. The post #127: 5 Things Husbands and Wives Wish the Other Knew (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Susan and I recently released our new books, Lists to Love By for Busy Husbands and Lists to Love By for Busy Wives and we both felt it very necessary to have our first list in both of our books be about truths. For today's podcast, we will share with you 7 truths about marriage that we have come to know to keep us grounded and have become particularly important when we experience rough patches in our relationship. The post #126: 7 Truths About Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

When we initially think about what we should do for our kids every day, we think of things like help with homework, make their lunches, take them to school, but really it's the relational things that they will remember. For today's podcast, we will go much deeper with the things we should be doing for our kids! The post #125: 8 Things Parents Should Do for their Kids Every Day (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

There are lots of not-so-great choices families make once in a while with no major consequences. But when those choices become habits, you've got a problem. Such is the case with most of these 8 negative habits to kick. If you see them making regular appearances in your family's life, act fast to correct them. […] The post #124: Top 8 Habits to Break as a Family (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Toxic words poison, and sometimes even kill relationships. I confess there have been too many times when harsh, harmful words have come out of my mouth toward my wife, Susan. It grieves me. I'm continually working hard to choose my words wisely. The post #123: What Not to Say to Your Spouse During a Fight (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

This can be a challenge for both husbands and wives. When your spouse is feeling down, it's hard to put yourself in their shoes. There used to be days where Susan would vent to me about an issue with one of our children and really needed my support. Instead of showing her that support, I felt I needed to fix the problem and move on. I would always want to fix the problem but that never works to resolve anything. So I'm learning how to uplift Susan when she's down. On today's show, we will be discussing 4 things to do when your spouse is feeling down. The post #122: 4 Things To Do When Your Spouse is Feeling Down (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

We are in the month of November and some may not realize that this month is National Adoption Month. National Adoption Month hits home for both Susan and I because we have two adopted children as part of our family and are so blessed to be their parents. The post #121: Impacting a Child's Life – Mentoring, Fostering, Adopting (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

One of the hallmarks of this year's presidential campaign has been plain rudeness on both sides, from the primaries to the conventions. We also see that lack of basic courtesies and manners on television, online, social media, and in life. Manners really have taken a back seat. The post #120: 5 Manners You Must Teach Your Children (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

During last week's podcast, we started discussing the trigger points of conflict that Susan and I have and how we try to disarm them. We will continue with a few more this week. The post #119: Prickly Spouse? Prepare for the Porcupine Part 2 (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

In our 28 years of marriage, Susan and I have had our fair share of conflict. What causes marital conflict, you ask? Well, a root cause is our selfishness. It's frustrating because it seems like a constant struggle that will always be there no matter how hard we try. The post #118: Prickly Spouse? Prepare for the Porcupine Part 1 (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

It's been almost 20 years, and it's amazing what God has done with the organization of All Pro Dad. All Pro Dad is one program under Family First, the non-profit organization that provides parenting, marriage and relationship resources that help people love their family well, along with iMOM, the Family Minute, MarkMerrill.com and this podcast. I'm in the studio today with the co-founder of All Pro Dad and NFL Hall of Famer, Coach Tony Dungy. The post #117: Celebrating Family and Fatherhood with Tony Dungy (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

A leader is simply someone who has followers-followers they influence. Susan and I have tried to raise all 5 of our children to be leaders. We've taught them it's not just what you do, it's who you are at the core. The post #116: How to Raise Your Child to be a Leader (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Today we will be sharing with you a little bit about a very important topic that we all have faced and we are all trying to figure out, and that issue is anger. Nobody likes it, but everybody deals with it. Why? Because anger has a way of sneaking up on us. Somehow small moments of frustration can quickly escalate into anger. But there's hope! I believe that getting to the root of anger will help us deal with emotions in a healthy way. The post #115: Anger: Face It, Find It, Figure it Out (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

For many years, our family went to the lake house of our close friends. We always did a lot of water skiing there. My parents were part of a water ski show when they were young and I inherited their love for the sport. When it was my turn to ski, I always wanted Susan to go. The post #114: 4 Secrets You Must Know About Your Spouse (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

The topic we will be discussing today is increasingly becoming more of an issue in relationships and in marriages – a lot of it has to do with technology and this is what it is: comparison. If you feel like the marriage grass is greener on the other side when you look at other couples, it could be that you're not watering your own lawn enough and spending too much time looking at theirs. The post #113: 4 Ways to Crush Comparison in Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Think back to when you first started to pursue your spouse. It required commitment, hard work, and imagination. If winning them over required that back then, why does it surprise us when neglect hurts our relationship after we walk down the aisle? They wouldn't have married you if you took them for granted. Why risk everything now? The post #112: 4 Strategies to Help Solve Your Marriage Problems (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Every husband and wife want to feel connected with one another…but sometimes busyness, the daily grind, stress and strain can get in the way and cause a feeling of NOT being connected…and when that happens, “marriage drift” sometimes occurs and you drift farther and farther apart without even knowing it. The key to staying connected is to be intentional. 6 things you can be intentional about… If your marriage is good, these six things can help you grow closer. If your marriage is so-so or even worse, they could help you give it a push in the right direction towards bonding time with your spouse. It's important to stay connected as a couple and Susan and have learned these 6 things in our 27 years of marriage… The post #111: 6 Things That Keep Couples Connected (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

As parents, we always wonder if we're doing this thing, called parenting, right…doing everything we should. And what do you do when your child starts exhibiting some bad habits and behaviors at a very young age? Lying, cheating, showing disrespect… Dealing with those bad habits can take thought and energy that can wear parents out. However, if left unchecked, they can grow into major problems down the line. It is important to engage the problem now in order to save them and us from more intense pain in the future. Here are some bad kid behavior issues that you need to break early. It's important to break bad behaviors early so Susan and I will be discussing 5 bad behaviors your kids must conquer on today's show: The post #110: 5 Bad Behaviors Your Kids Must Conquer (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Today's topic is one that affects really every marriage if you've been married for any length of time.  It's about loneliness. As humans, we are not meant to be isolated. We all crave deep and lasting connections with other people. But we know it's possible to feel alone in the middle of a crowd, and it's possible to sleep in the same bed with someone for years and still feel lonely. Many of us never expect to be lonely in marriage, hoping that our spouse will be the lifelong companion who saves us from loneliness. The post #109: How to Overcome Loneliness in Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

So, let's say that you've been wronged…wronged by your spouse, child, close friend or coworker. You thought you could count on them. You thought you could trust them. They let you down. It hurts. The pain runs deep inside you. What makes things worse, you didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve the deed. It wasn't your fault. Every day the painful video plays inside your head. You cannot erase it from your mental hard drive. Bitterness, resentment, and anger all start to flood your emotions. The post #108: Forgiveness: What It Is and What It Isn't (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

On today's podcast, Susan and I are going to be talking about a topic that affects each and every one of us. Many couples we've talked to through the years, especially newlyweds, assume that arguing in marriage is bad, counterproductive, and to be avoided at all costs. In reality, conflict is unavoidable, and how a couple fights during their arguments is actually more important than if a couple fights. We want to discuss some "sucker punches" you must stop throwing when fighting with your spouse. And, don't hit below the belt. The post #107: 7 Things to Avoid When Fighting with Your Spouse (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Over the years, Susan and I have learned that all 5 of our children , now all in their 20s, all need one thing and that's encouragement. We have good intentions and try to help; and, as parents, we may think we're encouraging our children, but it can actually feel like criticism to them. Sometimes their every desire is to please us and we, in turn, crush their spirit. Susan and I both have made these mistakes so we want to share those with you. As you try to help your kids be their best, be sure you're not actually implementing one of these 4 ways of discouraging your kids. The post #106: 4 Ways Parents Discourage Their Kids (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

It's so easy to push your spouse away without even realizing it. On several occasions, I've pushed Susan away and created a distance between us with my critical and condescending words. And Susan would tell you that she's pushed me away by texting and posting when I wanted her attention. So we hope that by listening to these 6 ways to push your spouse away on today's podcast, you'll actually learn how to pull your spouse toward you---not push away. The post #105: 6 Ways to Push Your Spouse Away (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

How well do you really know your spouse? I don't mean the color of their hair and eyes, or where they were born and went to school. That's their biography, their exterior. But what about their inner life: thoughts and feelings, hopes and fears? Do you know them in a way that builds the relationship? If you know your spouse well, you will be able to love them well. So it's important to be a student of your spouse, to study them and really know who they are! Today, Susan and I are going to go through some questions that will help you with the must-knows for your spouse. The post #104: 5 Things You Must Know About Your Spouse (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Over the years, we have worked with teens and adult children of divorce who were raised in two homes. Many times, they literally wanted to shout, “STOP PUTTING ME IN THE MIDDLE!!!” Unfortunately, most kids never have the courage to speak up and share their voice on these matters. - Tammy Daughtry A few months ago, we posted a blog on iMOM and had an outpouring of comments and responses in regards to children of divorced parents. We wanted to dig a little deeper into the issue and have asked the writer of that blog, Tammy Daughtry, to join us today. Susan, Tammy and I will discuss 4 things kids of divorce wish they could say to their parents! The post #103: 4 Things Kids of Divorce Wish They Could Say to Their Parents (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Did you know that your marriage may be better than you think? Too many couples don't appreciate the good marriage they have because they are too focused on the perfect marriage they want. Susan and I have experienced this in our own marriage and have to continually remind ourselves of the good, and great, we have together. Two things are typically true in marriages: 1) Those other “great” marriages are rarely as good as they look from the outside. 2) Your own marriage is not always as bad as you may think from the inside. On today's podcast, Susan and I will address 8 reasons why your marriage may be better than you think. The post #102: 8 Reasons Why Your Marriage May Be Better Than You Think (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Expectations. They are a very important part of marriage and we all have them, don't we? Husbands and wives should be able to expect certain things from one another; there are nonnegotiable marriage expectations that should be the same for all spouses. These are much deeper than leaving your socks on the floor. These are foundational expectations such as being a trustworthy spouse that every marriage needs. On today's podcast, Susan and I will address 3 things your spouse should expect from you. The post #101: 3 Things Your Spouse Should Expect from You (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

When I wrote about the 7 things that husbands and wives should stop doing in their relationship awhile back, some spirited comments and conversations resulted. On today's podcast, Susan and I want to address 6 things that you should stop doing in public---things that can harm your spouse and hurt your marriage. The post #100: 6 Things You Should Stop Doing to Your Spouse in Public (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Susan and I have raised 5 children through the teen years. Teenagers are trying to figure out life…who am I? Where am I going? Do I have what it takes? Am I beautiful? Teens have a lot going on under the surface that they either haven't identified, are afraid to say, or don't know how to tell you. So it remains inside, alone and unattended. What if we did know? It might change the way we parent teens. What do you think? Do you want to know how to parent a teenager better? The post #99: 7 Things Teenagers Secretly Want You to Know (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Too many marriages end in divorce. One of the reasons for this is couples today are not prepared for all the good and bad that may happen in marriage. So are you prepared? On today's podcast, Jackie and Stephana Bledsoe will be discussing with us three of the seven stages, or 7 Rings of Marriages, […] The post #98: The 7 Rings of Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Joy: We all want it, but few of us have it. Why? Because every day, people and circumstances overwhelm our lives and steal our joy. Things like fear, anxiety, jealousy, death, loneliness, and illness sneak in. These difficulties consume our thoughts and drain our energy until we're left feeling incapable of joy. But in spite of these setbacks, I believe joy is still possible. And I believe you deserve to find that joy! So on today's podcast, my wife, Susan, and I will be sharing 3 ways to find joy in the daily grind. The post #97 How to Find Joy in the Daily Grind (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

The difficulties we face in life have the power to break or strengthen our marriage...the choice is up to us. We can choose to harbor resentment and unforgiveness or we can choose to embrace love and restoration. It all comes down to one thing: if we have faith that our marriage is worth fighting for. Luckily, God offers us this faith and works alongside us to restore our marriage no matter how difficult the trial. Even after experiencing the pain of adultery, failure, and loss, Justin and Trisha Davis made the decision that their marriage was worth fighting for. This husband and wife duo founded RefineUs Ministries---a church movement to build healthy marriages and families. They currently live in Nashville as speakers and teachers. So on today's podcast, we'll be talking with this couple about how faith restored their marriage. The post #96: Restoring Your Marriage Against the Odds (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Presents...snow...mistletoe...There's nothing better than the holiday season! Except when you throw in angry shoppers, long lines, and sleepless nights wrapping gifts. That's when the chaos has a way of overwhelming the cheer. And Christmas becomes more stressful than peaceful. But not this year! Because this year, my wife, Susan, and I pledge to be better elves. The post #95: My Pledge: Be a Better Elf This Christmas (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.

Sometimes the storms of life are quiet rain showers that barely faze us. Other times the storms of life are more like hurricanes with 100 miles per hour winds! But whatever type of storm we may be facing, it's important that we learn how to be resilient in our most important relationship: our marriage. Why? Because being resilient empowers us to conquer any storm. In his newest book Resilient: Your Invitation to a Jesus-Shaped Life, Sheridan Voysey who is an Australian-born, Oxford-based writer, speaker, and broadcaster discusses the tough topic of resilience based on Jesus' Sermon on the Mount. So on today's podcast, we'll be discussing the 4 factors of resilience The post #94: How to be Resilient in Your Marriage (Podcast) appeared first on Mark Merrill's Blog.