Podcasts about darwyn dave

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Best podcasts about darwyn dave

Latest podcast episodes about darwyn dave

Grief Dreams Podcast
E186 - Update with Darwyn Dave

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 19, 2021 47:50


In this episode we talk with Darwyn Dave about his challenges in 2020, the love shown from his podcast listeners, a co-worker's death and GoFundMe page, and the amount of deaths during the pandemic.   To find more about Darwyn visit http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/   You can find Freddy Davila’s GoFundMe Page here https://gofund.me/b34762c5

Bereavement Room
#17 Darwyn Dave

Bereavement Room

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 21, 2020 87:10


We continue to talk to our guests from across the African American diaspora, today's episode is a Father's Day special with Darwyn Dave from Dealing with my grief podcast. Darwyn was 10 years old when his father was murdered. We discuss what unraveled on that day and what followed over the years since that day. We look at gun laws, apology letters and what it was like for Darwyn's parents living during the time of Jim Crow Law that enforced racial segregation. This episode is dedicated to Mansfield Dave and all of our Grandfathers and Fathers. You can reach Darwyn at http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/ Thank you for listening.Your hostCallsuma Ali

Gravedancers: Life and Leadership After Loss
Episode 3 - Darwyn Dave: Making Meaning

Gravedancers: Life and Leadership After Loss

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 19, 2019 84:00


Darwyn Dave hosts his own podcast called "Dealing With My Grief". Alyssa talks with Darwyn about his grief journey as a young boy after his dad was murdered when he was ten years old. We also talk about this podcast platform and how to invite more people into the conversation.

making meaning darwyn dealing with my grief darwyn dave
Grief Cafe
Introducing Grief Cafe

Grief Cafe

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2019 3:03


Hosts of the Grief Dreams podcast, Dr. Joshua Black and Shawn Ram team up with Darwyn Dave, the host of the Dealing With My Grief podcast to talk about grief related topics. We will discuss anything that has been in the news recently or any topic that might be relevant in our lives at the time. If you'd like to hear a discussion on a specific topic, email us at griefcafe.com

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Grief Dreams Podcast
E122 - A Father's Day Episode with Darwyn Dave

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2019 49:58


In this Father’s Day episode, Shawn Ram talks with Dr. Joshua Black and Darwyn Dave about the Toronto Raptors (NBA) and St. Louis Blues (NHL), players on those teams with a dead father, what it’s like not having a father here for important moments, and grief dreams we think the players would like to have of their deceased father.    To find more about Darwyn visit http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/

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Grief Dreams Podcast
E117 - A Mother's Day Episode with Darwyn and Shelby

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2019 72:39


This is a special Mother’s Day episode where Dr. Joshua Black interviews Darwyn Dave and Shelby Forsythia. In this episode we talk about our moms, the experience of facing this day when your mom is dead, and tips for those grieving on Mother’s Day.   To find more about Darwyn visit http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/   To find more about Shelby visit http://www.shelbyforsythia.com/

Podcast - Picture Lock
Picture Lock Radio: Ep. 116- DC Web Fest 2019 Artists

Podcast - Picture Lock

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 12, 2019


Happy Friday Folks! This weekend the DC Web Fest hits Washington, DC. I’m serving up some more of the officially selected entrants whose work you’ll be able to see this year. I have Latasha James, host of the Freelance Friday Podcast, Joey Fama, screenwriter of Townhouse of Doom, Crystal Correa producer/star of Crystal the Web Series, Darwyn Dave host of Dealing With My Grief podcast, and Kyle Getz, co-creator and co-host of the Gayish podcast. I’ve also got the answer to last week’s question of the week and you all had a lot to say. Get DC Web Fest Info here: www.dcwebfest.org Check out Latasha’s podcast here: https://www.ajourneyeast.com/podcast Find out more about Joey here: https://www.joeyfamawriting.com See Crystal star as Crystal here on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2Z9KPIf Listen to Darwyn’s podcast: http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/ Check out Gayish here: http://gayishpodcast.com In Theaters This Week reviews: Missing Link: http://picturelockshow.com/new-releases/2019/4/9/missing-link-review-somethings-missing-alright Little: http://picturelockshow.com/new-releases/2019/4/11/little-review Picture Lock Links: Take my PR For The Indie Filmmaker online course here: https://indiefilmpr.thinkific.com/ Get a partner as passionate as you in your film or film event's publicity: www.picturelockpr.com Subscribe to this podcast in iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/kevin-sampsons-picture-lock/id639359584?mt=2 Be sure to visit www.picturelockshow.com for everything Picture Lock! Please give us a review on whatever platform you listen to this podcast on. Thanks so much for your continued support. Drop a line a picturelockshow@gmail.com to say hi and let us know what you think of the show. FACEBOOK: www.facebook.com/picturelockshow SNAPCHAT: https://www.snapchat.com/add/picturelockshow YouTube CHANNEL:http://www.youtube.com/picturelockshowTWITTER:https://twitter.com/picturelockshowINSTAGRAM:http://instagram.com/picturelockshowPINTEREST:http://pinterest.com/picturelockshow

Grief Dreams Podcast
Episode 99 - Guest Update Episode - Darwyn Dave

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2018 45:54


This is our first Guest Grief Dream Update Episode with Darwyn Dave from Episode 18. In this episode we talk about his recent loss of his mother, his first grief dream of her, and preparing of the holidays.   You can find more about Darwyn at http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com   

darwyn darwyn dave
Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss
E57: There Is Life Beyond Bereavement with Annah Elizabeth - Bereavement Cruise 2019

Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 3, 2018 60:56


Seven years of non-stop losses drove Annah Elizabeth to ask, "What makes some people resilient and others crumble under the weight of grief?" That questioning led her to uncover her system of recovering from grief, The Five Facets of Healing. Today we're talking about how we spend the rest of our lives finding resolution for grief, how the second and third year of loss tend to be the hardest to cope with, and how not believing you're healing is a weird part of the healing process. Also this week, I'm announcing my upcoming Patreon Hangout and reserving some time to honor an amazing woman. Receive more information on the 2019 Bereavement Cruise when you fill out this form: http://www.comingbackcruise.com Listen to Darwyn Dave's tribute to his mom on Dealing with My Grief here: http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/podcast/episode-129 Annah Elizabeth's work: http://www.annahelizabeth.com/ Support Coming Back on Patreon and join me for this month's LIVE Google Hangout: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia Subscribe: Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/2CMqhhE Spotify http://spoti.fi/2CMr16k Stitcher http://bit.ly/2m08eJr YouTube http://bit.ly/2m1JWil Google Podcasts https://tinyurl.com/y8elxq9t TuneIn http://bit.ly/2F469Fl Continue the conversation on grief and loss in my private Facebook group, The Grief Growers' Garden: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thegriefgrowersgarden/ To ask a question or leave a comment for a future show, leave a voicemail at 312.725.3043 or email shelby@shelbyforsythia.com. Because even through grief, we are growing. http://www.shelbyforsythia.com/  

School of Podcasting
Is Podcasting Frying Your Brain?

School of Podcasting

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 24, 2018 59:01


Because Of My Podcast - The Family Travel Podcast Michael, He is on podcast number two, and this one is allowing him to make some money http://abigpeacheyadventure.com.au/family-travel-podcast/ Question of the Month: Where Are you With Podcasting? 6:28 Clay from the Fish Nerds Podcast is a 4 7:30 Paul from the Fighting Through Podcast is a 1 8:48 Andrea from Union Podcastera is a 1 12:18 Darwyn Dave from Dealing with My Grief is 1 13:59 Brad from The Cinema Guys is a 1 15:23 Jared from The Fire Rescue is a 3 16:52 Micah and Dustin from Tales From Bedlum -5 17:55   Jonathon Bloom from the Weekly Awesome Podcast- 1 19:07 Kim from Teachers Need Teachers  is a 1 23:21 Josh from the Corner Cutters Podcast (about the Rubik's cube) - 1 25:10 Ryan Nelson - Conspiracy Theoryology is a 1 27:27 Master Kuldryn's from Kuldryn's Krypt is a - 1 28:28 Seth from Geekville Radio, www.twbpodcast.com and Classic Wrestling Memories  is a 1  31:01 Timothy kdoipodcasting.com was at a 5 and is now at a 3  34:52 Vanessa from Vanessa's View is at a 1 (or UNO)  39:41 Win Charles is a 6 Check Out Joe Today in Orlando Tuesday (this coming Tuesday...September 25th) The Improv Orlando Florida Doors open at 6:30 - Show starts at 7:30 $10 LOTS of people in the cast. We EVEN have an opening act, the awesome 15-minute long Popcorn Finance podcast (up for a personal finance Plutus Award for Best New Podcast in that space) at next week's award show. http://stackingbenjamins.com/tour   Update on Michael Stelzner and Social Media Marketing World In episode 635 (Logic and Emotion) I had mentioned how Social Media Marketing World has pulled their podcasting track. I wanted to clarify while Leo Laporte at one point had said "podcasting is dead" and then later took it back, Michael Stelzner never said podcasting is dead. He simply said his statistics show that his socials media crowd that attends his audience is less interested in the subject of podcasting. Michael still uses podcasting to promote Social Media Marketing world. If you can't afford the trip, some of the top experts are speaking at this event, and you can purchase a virtual ticket I just got done binging on Michael's YouTube series "The Journey" as the second season has just started (so I have to binge the first episode) and this once again proves that "behind the scenes" information is often "not boring." Check it out at journey.show Sue Jennett Your chat about choosing words that evoke emotion was interesting for me, as I like to choose my words carefully for both my podcasts and my blog. I hadn’t before thought about trying to evoke any emotion, but more to inform in an easy-to-listen-to manner. As often happens when I hear your podcasts, I’m at that time working on something to which I can apply your advice. I was, last night, ready to record my speaking portions and edit a podcast about the sacrament of communion for those on a ggluten-freediet. Earlier in the evening ,I chaired a meeting of our local celiac support group, and out of the blue, someone stopped me before I left to ask if I knew any solutions for this exact problem. She didn’t know I had researched it, and spoken to a guest about it. I felt good that I could impart some useful information to her, but what was more impactful on me was her emotional investment in the issue. I left the meeting and came home to “infuse” my podcast with small tugs on the emotional fabric of my listeners. I also used the same strategy to write my social media for today. Small changes, small words, strategically placed to evoke emotion, when the subject is suitable is something I now have in my arsenal of podcasting tools. Thanks Dave – BTW my social posts are getting more comments and interaction than I have ever had on any particular podcast – and guess what – they are mostly emotionally driven! PS – I started a second podcast over the summer on gluten free weight loss/management so you’ll soon see my comments on your Logical Weight Loss Podcast, as I’ve binged on it for a few months now. acanadianceliacblog.com Ready to Start a Podcast? I'd Love to Help You! Go to www.schoolofpodcasting.com/start

Podcast Rodeo  Podcast Reviews and First Impressions

Comments: 888-563-3228 Description My name is Darwyn M. Dave, and I lost my father in April of 1978 when I was just 10 years old. Even though that was a long time ago, I have realized that I'm not "over" his death, but in fact I'm still dealing with it.I've started the Dealing With My Grief blog/podcast to discuss how I have been coping with grief and bereavement since that time.It is my hope that in creating this space I am able to connect with others who have lost someone close to them and in some small way help them deal with their pain. Website www.dealingwithmygrief.comEpisode 122 http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/podcast/episode-122 Opinion I thought this show started off great. The audio is good. You know what you are getting into. The host gives a tease for next week's show and then dives right into a story. As this show deals with grief, it can feel uncomfortable listening. The host (Darwyn Dave) is being uber transparent. He starts to talk about visiting the grave of his father (who he lost when he was 10) and then explains how this time he brought his Mom. For me a clear indicator of a good show is when I press pause after a few minutes, do I want to hear the rest of the episode? In this case, I did. This is where you always need to consider the source (I lost my Mom when I was 24 and can easily identify with Darwyn). I really can't find anything about the show's opening that needs work.You can hear my appearance on this show on episode 105 Get A Full Review If you’d like a full review of your podcast, check out Podcast Review Show or if you need Podcast Consulting, Book an Appointment Today Get Your Podcast Reviewed Sign up at Fiverr. comGet a full review on the Podcast Review Show. Free Subscription to the Podcast Rodeo Show Subscribe to the show and never miss another episode on Google Podcasts and Apple Podcasts. For more options see www.podcastrodeoshow.com/subscribeThis podcast is powered by Pinecast. Try Pinecast for free, forever, no credit card required. If you decide to upgrade, use coupon code r-1a62eb for 40% off for 4 months, and support Podcast Rodeo Podcast Reviews and First Impressions.

Grief Dreams Podcast
Episode 75 - Reflections of Dad: Past, Present, and Future - With Darwyn Dave

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2018 44:14


This is a special Father's Day episode where Shawn Ram interviews Joshua Black and Darwyn Dave. 

School of Podcasting
Giving You The Nudge You Need to Create Episode 1 Of Your Podcast With Monica Rivera

School of Podcasting

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 9, 2018 47:44


Question of the Month As I record this it is April 1. The first quarter of 2018 is over. What had you planned on doing in that first quarter that didn't, and what are you going to do differently to make it happen in this quarter. You can leave your answer using the options on the contact page Because of My Podcast: I've overcome the fear of failure, perfection, and I'm Growing a Community - Brodie Sharpe Brodie Sharp from Everyday  Running Legends interviews everyday average runners to inspire other runners. Becuase of his podcast he has overcome the fear of failure. He read in the book The Success  Principles by Jack Canfield and in it, he quotes Oliver Wendell Holmes who said, "Many people die with their music still in them. Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it time runs out." Brodie said his podcast has helped him overcome the fear of perfection. His brother (who is a life coach) said, "All you need to start is produce B minus content. If you strive for A+ it will never be good enough and it will never be done." Also, because of my podcast, I've been able to build a community. Check out Brodie at https://everydayrunninglegends.com/ Before they know it time runs out Today I want to dedicate this effort to my Aunt Shirley Steinmetz. She died of lung Cancer on 4/7/18. What is weird about this is my Dad died on April 5th, 2014. Hist sister Sandra died on April 6th 2016. Then yesterday on April 7th, another sister (Aunt Shirley) joined them. I say this not to bring you down or look for sympathy, but to just remind you that our time here is limited, and our time here is short. Don't die with a great podcast inside of you. Speaking of time running out... I was on Episode 105 of the Dealing with My Grief Podcast with Darwyn Dave talking about Unresolved Grief. Check it out at http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/podcast/episode-105 You Don't Have to Worry About These Things in Your Podcast I might sound bad. Podcasting is not live. You only release it when you're done with it. I'm afraid of technology. You said that about the fax machine and the VCR, and your smartphone. If you've ever attached a picture to Facebook or email, then you can upload a file to Libsyn.com (using coupon code sopfree). If you ever pressed record on a VCR then you can press record on Audacity. If you've ever lowered the radio in the car so you can talk on the phone, then you know how to mix volume levels. I'm afraid of buying the wrong equipment. - Join the School of podcasting or set up a consulting call. I'm worried nobody will listen. I recently interviewed JJ virgin who is a hall of fame fitness trainer and nutritionist. In her book The Miracle Mindset, she explains her insecurities. Yet she has been on Dr. Phil, Dr. Oz. Rachel Ray, the Doctors and been a New York Times bestselling author feels the same way. As a tech support person at Libsyn.com, I often get people who send in a support ticket because their podcast is having a surge in downloads, and they can't believe it when people actually do listen. I Don't Have Two Thousand Dollars to Spend on Equipment - Most people can launch a podcast for around $300, and then a monthly fee of around $30. Please don't spend two thousand dollars on equipment. I'm Afraid Of Negative Reviews - Most podcasters don't get a lot of bad reviews. You will get them eventually, but many podcasters don't feel you are a real podcaster until you get your first one-star review in Apple Podcasts. You can't please everyone, and people who do make very bland content.   Monica Rivera Helps Give You The Nudge You Need Monica River is the host of the You Wanna Do What? Podcast.  I've met her at two events, and started listening to her show. Like we've heard over and over on this show, when someone finds a show they like they often download the entire back catalog and that is exactly what I did. the further back into her catalog I got I could then understand the growth that she has gone through in seven months of podcasting. She is wise beyond her years, and her podcast is filled with interesting stories. She still hasn't figured out if she wants to monetize, and if she does how she will do it, but she knew the first step was starting and so she did. In this interview you will hear: Her "hot mess" that is episode one How she got rid of the reverb in her recordings The different microphones she has used (she now uses an ATR2100 ) The feedback she is getting from her listeners How her approached has changed How long it takes her to create an episode. What she has learned going to different events.  Check out her show at www.youwannadowhat.com as well as Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, and Spotify Work With Dave Jackson Do you need help starting a podcast? Growing your podcast? Choosing Equipment? Troubleshooting? Check out www.schoolofpodcasting.com/workwithme

Emotional Happiness
EHP050 How To Deal With Grief

Emotional Happiness

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 8, 2018 28:52


If you have any idea how hard it is to get men to talk openly about their feelings, you know how excited I was to get Darwyn Dave on my Talk Show, That Anita Live. Darwyn runs a successful grief and bereavement podcast titled, Dealing With My Grief where he shares that grief isn’t something you get over, it’s something you learn how to manage. His podcast episodes are all about how he has been coping loss of his father who was murdered in an attempted robbery. The process of grief is not linear, it moves like energy sometimes you feel good and sometimes you don’t, but you get to decide if it keeps you going in circles. If the pressure of grief has you feeling overwhelmed, please reach out for a helping hand – you can call the National Crisis Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK, that’s 1-800-273-8255 – To reach out to Darwyn visit DealingWithMyGrief.com We are here for you, because I know sometimes we don’t want to be fixed, we just want to be heard. Make the commitment to start your journey to emotional healing today. I promised you, life is fulfilling and blessed on the other side. Enjoy the interview! Host: Anita Washington, That Anita Live   Topic: How To Deal With Grief   Guest: Darwyn Dave Guest’s Website: http://www.DealingWithMyGrief.com Darwyn and I would love to hear from you. Have you found it difficult to deal with the loss of a loved one? Leave us your thought and comments below. 

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Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss
In the Meantime: Darwyn Dave on Keepsakes

Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2018 6:39


Darwyn Dave finds comfort in the physical objects his father left behind. Darwyn Dave's work: http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/ Season 3 of Coming Back returns May 2, 2018! In the meantime...  Enter my giveaway to win two copies of The Grief Recovery Method Handbook® by supporting Coming Back on Patreon. Winner will be selected at random from the list of all active patrons as of 4/30/2018. Winner will receive two paperback copies of The Grief Recovery Method Handbook, a set of three Coming Back podcast stickers, and a handwritten thank you note. Make your pledge here: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia FREE! Watch me LIVE with Sharon Ehlers on Grief and Healing Corner on Tuesday 4/3 at 8:30 Central: https://www.facebook.com/griefreiki/ FREE! Join me LIVE in Seattle for a Coming Back podcast meetup Monday 4/23 from 4:00-6:00 Pacific on the 7th floor patio of the Fourth and Madison Building: https://www.facebook.com/events/1766567910029917/ Ask Me Anything LIVE on Google Hangouts Sunday 4/29 at 7:00 Central when you pledge $33/month or more on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Subscribe: iTunes https://apple.co/2CMqhhE Spotify http://spoti.fi/2CMr16k Stitcher http://bit.ly/2m08eJr YouTube http://bit.ly/2m1JWil GooglePlay http://bit.ly/2lWQmiG TuneIn http://bit.ly/2F469Fl Continue the conversation on grief and loss in my private Facebook group, The Grief Growers' Garden: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thegriefgrowersgarden/ To ask a question or leave a comment for a future show, leave a voicemail at 312.725.3043 or email shelby@shelbyforsythia.com, subject line, "Podcast." Because even through grief, we are growing. http://www.shelbyforsythia.com/

Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss
E38: Dealing with My Grief with Darwyn Dave

Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2018 56:59


Darwyn Dave has been dealing with his grief since the age of 10, when his father was shot and killed in the convenience store that he owned and ran. Grief has given Darwyn lots of lenses on life enabling him to see many, many sides to topics like technology, family history, and gun violence. Today we're talking about how grief gives us perspective... and keeps giving us perspective for the rest of our lives. Also on the show, I'm talking about how acknowledgment is not enough—we must take action in order to grow from our grief. Darwyn Dave's work: http://www.dealingwithmygrief.com/ Join me live on Facebook Monday 3/12 at 1:00 Central. Support Coming Back on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia Subscribe: iTunes https://apple.co/2CMqhhE Spotify http://spoti.fi/2CMr16k Stitcher http://bit.ly/2m08eJr YouTube http://bit.ly/2m1JWil GooglePlay http://bit.ly/2lWQmiG TuneIn http://bit.ly/2F469Fl Continue the conversation on grief and loss in my private Facebook group, The Grief Growers' Garden: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thegriefgrowersgarden/ To ask a question or leave a comment for a future show, leave a voicemail at 312.725.3043 or email shelby@shelbyforsythia.com, subject line, "Podcast." Because even through grief, we are growing. http://www.shelbyforsythia.com/

Building a Better Dave
Grief is Like A Website

Building a Better Dave

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 18, 2017 29:45


I went to Washington DC last week. I met a girl who does a show called "Good Grief." She started recording her podcast after he died and she found out he had a second family with two additional children of which she was one. Woa. I also got to meet Darwyn Dave who does the show Dealing With My Grief. Darwyn's Dad was murdered. Damn. Like straight up murdered. So I listened to these shows on the way home. This lead to some strange thinking, and emotions bubbling through. Emotional Triggers I focus on the weirdest things lately. My brother got pretty sick a little while ago and he had a weird situation where he was sweating under a bunch of blankets because he was freezing. He had lost a lot of color, and looked bad. It was spooky even though I knew he would pull through. The bottom line is we are out of Grandparents, we have a few Aunts to play, one Uncle who is 94, and then we become the next generation in line. You know and I know that it's going to get here sooner or later. There is nothing we can do about that.  Maybe it's because my brother and I were estranged for years, and now we're not, that the thought of us being apart can cause my eyes to leak.  And when I start to grieve, I feel like I have a buy one get one free. That I have leftovers that have been sitting in the pantry waiting to be consumed.  My Mom died in 1989. That's a while ago. My finals at college were the next week and yet I still had to take them. I cried. I wept. Then it was back to school. I was now running a house as my Dad was still a long distance truck driver, and my sister..... while she has never been diagnosed I think she has assburgers.  She doesn't like any change in her routine. I remember trying to get her to write things on a shopping list. She would say, "but that's not how Mom did it." I would have to answer, "I know, but Mom's not here." It was a strange relationship because I was the little brother taking care of my older sister. When my Dad got home on the weekends, I would fill him in on the bills, house, and get to my homework.  I remember my last semester. I took more credit hours than I have ever taken because if I didn't graduate I was going to lose my mind. It was graduate or die trying. My GPA took a hit, but I got the piece of paper and moved on.  Being That Guy My Mom died when I was 24. Looking back, I was a baby. I thought I was an adult, but I was pretty young. It deeply affected me. I became a workaholic. I still am. I've never wanted that to be my calling card. Hello, I'm Dave Jackson and my Mom died when I was 24. Yet, it is part of my history. It left a scar. It shaped me. I just don't want it to be my definition.  I Asked God For a Kid and He Said No I spent myself into bankruptcy trying to have a kid. It didn't happen and instead, my wife became an alcoholic and cheated on me. Pity party for one, again...  The last episode of Good Grief, Sam has her Dad (the man who raised her ) explain what it means to be a Dad. He explained how it changes you. It transforms you. It makes you complete. It was like a bad horror flick where the person rips out your hear and holds it in front of you.  Again, I don't want to be that guy. When I got to meet my friend's nine-month-old son it was awesome. He is the sweetest kid. This doesn't bother me. I don't ache to have my own, but I do have a major fear of missing out. If having children makes you complete, then I'm not. Am I broken? I dunno. I like me. I think I'm ok... confused.. Playing Ball With My Dad My Dad was not a bad Dad. He just wasn't around. He was on the road four to five days a week and would come home and sleep and then repeat. My brother bought me my first baseball glove. My brother was pushing the bike that I learned to ride. My Dad did take me fishing once. But it was that ball thing. Aren't you supposed to go in the backyard and toss the ball, any ball around? It never happened. Now here is the stupid part. We played ping pong on a regular basis. It was fun. We laughed, and battle hard. I'm not sure why this doesn't count for me. I guess cause you don't see it on TV or in the movies... I was at the park walking through the woods. The woods opened into an opening with a baseball field. There it was. A boy about age seven or eight pitching the ball to his Dad playing catcher. My heart just jumped out of my chest. It was like looking into a store window of something you will never be able to buy. I wanted to run out on the field and go, "DUDE, do you know how LUCKY you are?!" Then I got mad. Like any child who doesn't get what they want. Why did everyone get to play catch but me? Pity party for one.  When I was young, some of my oldest memories are sitting on my Granpa's living room floor. My Dad would argue with him Mom about something stupid, and eventually, my Grandpa and my Dad would go outside. I'm assuming they talked. They had a father and son moment, some sort of discussion. I'm assuming this is why we came over. My Dad wanted to hang with his Dad. This again pisses me off. My father and I had chit chat. We talked about my weather. For most of my life, my father was confused about what I did for a living. I was a corporate trainer teaching people software and he still thought I was fixing copiers. Actually, he thought I was fixing printers. He's open a Best Buy advertisement and say, "David here's your stuff." I got tired of correcting him.  I remember after my first divorce, and I thought I need to try to play catch up with my Dad. We weren't close, and the only way to fix that was to spend some time together. I asked my Dad if he wanted to go to an Indians game. I was going to buy some tickets, and he could get to see the new stadium the team had built. He turned me down. He said you can see things better on TV. To this, I can't argue. It's true. But it wasn't about the game, it was about spending time with your son. I would go over to his house and watch a game with him, and we would exchange chit-chat. This an often open the door of anger. Like why did you not want that? I had more "Mentoring talks" with my oldest stepson about women, school, life in the eight years I was in his life than my Dad and I had in the 50 years I knew him.  When he died I mourned what I lost, but I mainly mourned that what never was and never would be. I mourned a blown opportunity. It was classic cats and the cradle. He was busy, then I was busy. Then his mind left before I could pick his brain.  Closing the Hallway Doors As I go through life, I feel I'm OK. My life could be so much worse. I have a job I love, a cool apartment and the freedom to do pretty much whatever I want whenever I want. But there are times when I'm left alone with my thoughts, or I'm listening to a podcast about grief that I hear the drips of grief. I hear a door stressing against the pressure of what is behind it. I turn the knob and a river of tears covers me. I'm not surprised but still shocked. What is up with this? I struggle, I push hard, and finally, the door closes. I few more steps and sometimes the weirdest thing will set off another door. It glows orange from the anger behind it. When I crack the door, the heat blows back my hair like opening an oven. I fell it engulfing my body, but I don't want it. I push and push with all I have and eventually, it closes.  What Happened to Time Heals All Wounds It's been decades. What is up with this? I read about Grief, and I hear how some people can't move on. I've moved on. I work, I eat, I laugh. I accept that this is the new normal. This is as good as it is probably going to get. My Dad burned two things into my brain: The world doesn't revolve around David Jackson The world is not fair (which is somewhat of a rerun).  So when I didn't want to do something, I did it anyway. When I wanted something, and couldn't have it. I had to suck it up. I remember on the few occasions when my Dad had to spank me it was always the most conflicting of actions. He would put me on his legs, smacked my butt and then I would cry. This would last for about 10 seconds, and my Dad would then tell me to go get a warm washcloth and bring it to him. Not wanting to get spanked, I would do that. He would then take the cloth, put on the back of my neck, shoosh me and tell me it was going to be OK. It worked, and I calmed down, and in many cases that's all my parents needed me to do.  But When Is This Grieving Thing Over? I thought time heals all wounds. Well, I guess if you count that I can function a win, I guess it's true. When you read about the seven steps it always sounded like when you got done with the last step you would be back to normal.  As I don't want to be "That Guy" I looked into this and found an article that seemed to make sense. Here is a paragraph The misguided notion that grief is a process that allows a final working through of a loss is likely the fault of my own profession--mental health professionals who have promoted this notion in their work with grieving individuals. Clinical data makes it clear that any significant loss, later and repeatedly, brings up longing and sadness. Is it because these people have not achieved closure by traversing prescribed stages of mourning or because they have not "worked through the loss" as some therapists boldly claim? No. It's because you never get over loss. As time passes, the intensity of feelings about the loss will lessen, you might also find ways to sooth or distract yourself, or you can partially bury grief-related feelings by creating new memories. But you're not going to get over it because that's impossible: you cannot erase emotional memory. Besides, it's not about achieving closure. Instead, you have to figure out what you are going to do when your emotional memories are later triggered.  (Full Article) This is good and bad. It's good that I no longer feel like I'm broken because I still miss my parents. It's bad, because grief is like a website design. It's never done. You always need to tweak it. It might be fine for years, but something will come along and you will need to tear it all down and rebuild it. A website is never really done, and apparently, you cannot erase the emotional memory.   

Grief Dreams Podcast
Episode 37 - Father's Day Podcast with Darwyn Dave

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 16, 2017 48:09


Episode 37 is a special Father's Day Podcast with Darwyn Dave. In this episode we catch up with Darwyn, get the scoop on a conference Joshua attended in La Crosse, Wisconsin (The International Death, Grief and Bereavement Conference), and Joshua and Darwyn talk Father's Day. Both Joshua and Darwyn's fathers' have passed away so we get their perspective of this holiday, and we build some dreams for both in honour of their fathers'. This podcast is dedicated to them, as well as all father's alive and passed away.

Grief Out Loud
Ep. 55: Looking Back At Grief - Darwyn Dave

Grief Out Loud

Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2017 21:04


Our guest is Darwyn Dave, creator and host of the Dealing With My Grief podcast. In 1978, when Darwyn was ten years old, his father was killed. 38 years later, in January of 2016, Darwyn turned to podcasting as a way to explore grief and how it continues to shape the adult he is today. With his unique mix of candor and insight, Darwyn illuminates the interior world of what it was like to be 10 and suddenly without his father.  Dealing With My Grief Podcast www.dealingwithmygrief.com Darwyn's Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/dealingwithmygrief/

Grief Dreams Podcast
Episode 18 - Darwyn Dave

Grief Dreams Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 18, 2017 42:42


Darwyn Dave is an IT consultant by day and a photographer by night who resides in the Washington, DC metropolitan area. In January of 2016 he started the “Dealing with My Grief” podcast as a way of chronicling his personal grief recovery process. To listen to his podcast please visit www.dealingwithmygrief.com

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