Mythbusting Neurodiverse Relationships

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Welcome to the Mythbusting Neurodiverse Relationships Podcast, with hosts Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks, busting myths that we’ve realised aren’t true and that were preventing us from recovering and having the relationships and connection with partners and children that we desperately wanted. lovingdifference.net natalieroberts.com heatherparks.co.uk

Loving Difference


    • Feb 27, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 30m AVG DURATION
    • 38 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Mythbusting Neurodiverse Relationships

    35. Invisible Control in Your Neurodiverse Relationship

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 27, 2025 17:42


    www.lovingdifference.net♟️Are you playing an invisible game of chess in your neurodiverse relationship?Are you open to the possibility that you may be unintentionally controlling yourself, situations, issues, outcomes, other people?As I took a different path to resolve the hamster wheel of issues in my neurodiverse relationship/family I realised I was. Initially I was shocked and ashamed. I didn't think I was that kind of person. I didn't want to be that kind of person. I saw how others controlled or appeared to control me or how they did it with others but I'd never looked at myself!It was a big thing to admit and an even bigger thing to decide to do something about. I thought it would mean giving up on what I'd longed for or needed or what I thought others should be doing or who I thought I had to be or should be to fit in and feel secure and be liked and all that kind of thing.. I know we all have our own versions of these!Turns out there are different, better and much healthier ways for ALL of this. When we say to members that we don't use compromise or ultimatums they don't believe us!... that's because we've learned, been taught and believe and live in a culture where they are required or the only way to sort the big stuff out. Turns out that's not true

    34. Are You Playing Trigger Dominoes in Your Neurodiverse Relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 13, 2025 15:50


    www.lovingdifference.netIf you're here, you're likely experiencing Trigger Dominoes in your neurodiverse relationship, a catalogue of triggers on a daily basis for many years, resulting in unhappiness, disconnection and exhaustion. In today's episode, Natalie is flying solo and sharing some more on this relationship game we're often playing and how we can change the rules and the outcomes of the game!*****Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference at https://www.lovingdifference.net/Loving Difference - HOPE and a Way Forward for Neurodiverse Relationships ✨Loving Difference is hosted by Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks. The Loving Difference Relationship System they coach, specifically designed for neurodiverse relationships, prioritises recovery first and new foundations for better communication and connection. Subscribing members in the programme hosted there are solving the biggest issues experienced in neurodiverse relationships: exhaustion, being YOU, communication, connection, intimacy, resentment and reactivity. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    33. Guests on Neurodiverse Christian Marriage Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2025 65:42


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're in conversation with Dr Stephanie Holmes from Neurodiverse Christian Marriages, answering questions from her listeners. Natalie and I share our perspectives and, of course, try to bust some myths that we think are stereotypical, unhelpful and untrue! We cover why it's highly problematic to tell another person that they may be neurodivergent and we also ask a question about what else other than neurodiversity may be contributing to relationship issues.  We hope that you enjoy listening. We'd love you to takeaway the message that there is so much more hope and possibility ahead than the 'everything is fixed and nothing can change' stereotypical messages that we found at the beginning of our journey and which left us feeling hopeless and stuck.  ⭐️ You can change your experience without having to get someone else somewhere. There is a way forward when your partner is unable or not interested in discovering more or going to couples counselling.  ⭐️ You can reverse the impact of unknown neurodiversity and recover from the persistent stress and BE YOU again.   ⭐️ The truth that we've found is that there is hope and a way forward. The Loving Difference Relationship System supports you to create more choices and more possibility in your neurodiverse relationship.  If you'd prefer to listen to a short summary of this conversation, you can find it on YouTube at this link https://youtu.be/HQqD11rhrsE With thanks to Stephanie Holmes for hosting this conversation and for giving us permission to publish this recording on our podcast. And, if you'd like to find out more about Neurodiverse Christian Marriages here's the website https://www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com/ ***** Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family?  Join Loving Difference at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Loving Difference - HOPE and a Way Forward for Neurodiverse Relationships ✨Loving Difference is hosted by Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks. The Loving Difference Relationship System they coach, specifically designed for neurodiverse relationships, prioritises recovery first and new foundations for better communication and connection. Subscribing members in the programme hosted there are solving the biggest issues experienced in neurodiverse relationships: exhaustion, being YOU, communication, connection, intimacy, resentment and reactivity.  #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    32. Celebrating 10 Years of Choosing!

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2024 12:15


    www.lovingdifference.net Celebrating 10 years of friendship, recovery, career change and the creation of the Loving Difference programme, Heather shares how difficult it was back then to prioritise herself enough to seek support. The myth we're busting in this episode is that you have to figure it out alone. The new truth we want members to hear is that there is hope and a way forward. There is a way to recover, heal and find healthier ways of relating in your neurodiverse relationship.  ***** Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family?  Join Loving Difference at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Loving Difference - HOPE and a Way Forward for Neurodiverse Relationships ✨Loving Difference is hosted by Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks. The Loving Difference Relationship System they coach, specifically designed for neurodiverse relationships, prioritises recovery first and new foundations for better communication and connection. Subscribing members in the programme hosted there are solving the biggest issues experienced in neurodiverse relationships: exhaustion, being YOU, communication, connection, intimacy, resentment and reactivity.  #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    31. How is my nervous system impacting my neurodiverse relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 5, 2024 23:09


    www.lovingdifference.net Today's episode is Heather's presentation at the online Neurodiverse Love conference in February 2023. Heather's busting the myth that things will only get better if your partner changes or if you change even more than you have already. We want you to know the new truth, that it takes two to create a pattern and only one to change it.. You can change your experience of the relationship by focusing on yourself. Listen or watch along to find out more and pop back to the previous episode to hear my presentation if you've not heard or watched it yet. We used slides in the presentation so some things may be a little tricky to make sense of. If you're listening to the podcast, you can watch instead via our Loving Difference youtube channel or even better come and join us at our online home in Loving Difference. ***** Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family?  Join Loving Difference at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Loving Difference - HOPE and a Way Forward for Neurodiverse Relationships ✨Loving Difference is hosted by Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks. The Loving Difference Relationship System they coach, specifically designed for neurodiverse relationships, prioritises recovery first and new foundations for better communication and connection. Subscribing members in the programme hosted there are solving the biggest issues experienced in neurodiverse relationships: exhaustion, being YOU, communication, connection, intimacy, resentment and reactivity.  #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    30. Is surviving or just liking my neurodiverse relationship the best I can hope for?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 21, 2024 21:47


    www.lovingdifference.net A different episode of the podcast for you today.. In this episode and the next one, we're sharing our presentations from the Neurodiverse Love conference that happened online in February 2023. We loved the opportunity to share our experience with others there and now we're bringing them to a wider audience via the podcast too. In Natalie's presentation today she's busting the myth that surviving or just liking your neurodiverse relationship is the best you can hope for. We want you to know the new truth that the impact of unknown neurodiversity in your relationship is reversible and you can thrive… and flourish. We used slides in the presentation so some things may be a little tricky to make sense of. If you're listening to the podcast, you can watch instead via our Loving Difference youtube channel or even better come and join us at our online home in Loving Difference. ***** Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family?  Join Loving Difference at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Loving Difference - HOPE and a Way Forward for Neurodiverse Relationships ✨Loving Difference is hosted by Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks. The Loving Difference Relationship System they coach, specifically designed for neurodiverse relationships, prioritises recovery first and new foundations for better communication and connection. Subscribing members in the programme hosted there are solving the biggest issues experienced in neurodiverse relationships: exhaustion, being YOU, communication, connection, intimacy, resentment and reactivity.  #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    29. Will festive seasons in my neurodiverse relationship always be a disaster?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 8, 2024 25:56


    28. My neurodiverse relationship can only get better if we're both on board with sorting it out

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 18, 2024 32:28


    www.lovingdifference.net It's been a while!!!.... it felt really good to get back to recording our conversations! If you're feeling lost, stuck and hopeless in your neurodiverse relationship and your partner can't or doesn't want to work on the issues that you think need sorting out, we're here with hope and a way forward! Here's some of the things we hear from people... 'If my partner doesn't want to see a professional together, I don't see how anything can change!' -- 'My partner's too scared to see someone - is there any other options?' -- 'My partner doesn't accept we're in a neurodiverse relationship and won't see anyone to sort things out. I'm losing hope that things can ever get better if I can't get them to couples counselling. What do I do?' -- 'I've said I'll leave if they won't come with me but I think that's made things worse. Can you help?' So if you're ready to sort things out and your partner isn't what CAN you do?! The good news is.... LOTS!! In this episode, we're busting the myth that things can only get better if both partners are on board with sorting the relationship out and both are willing to attend professional relationship support together. So many people we speak to have either forced, dragged, coerced, or used ultimatums to persuade their partner along to couples counselling or some other form of professional support for couples and been bitterly disappointed with how it went or the results they achieved. It's often done more harm than good, for individuals and the relationship or outcomes have been temporary. We know there are good outcomes for people too .. it's just probably not those who are listening to this podcast! If you're here, you've more likely been finding the information that concludes or seems to imply that there's no way your relationship can ever improve unless both partners are actively involved in sorting out the issues that one or both of them are experiencing - that all feels like a dead end of it's only you right now that's ready to sort things out. We're here with a different perspective because ten years ago we faced the same dead end and it left us feeling more stuck and powerless to change our situation, for us, for our children, for the relationship. It was devastating. We found a new way through... so let's dive into our next conversation. ***** Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Loving Difference - HOPE and a Way Forward for Neurodiverse Relationships ✨ Loving Difference is hosted by Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks. The Loving Difference Relationship System they coach, specifically designed for neurodiverse relationships, prioritises recovery first and new foundations for better communication and connection. Subscribing members in the programme hosted there are solving the biggest issues experienced in neurodiverse relationships: exhaustion, being YOU, communication, connection, intimacy, resentment and reactivity. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    27. Celebrating 9 Years Friends & Answering Your Questions

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 4, 2023 68:36


    www.lovingdifference.net Recently we got together to celebrate being friends for nine years and a special AUA (Ask Us Anything!) answering questions from Loving Difference members. In 2014, we both felt like we were suffocating and trapped in lives we couldn't change. It was as if life had drained the life out of us. We hoped that discovering neurodiversity would sort out the daily nightmare that our lives had become. Meeting each other, we started to breathe again. We found ways to bring ourselves back to life, woke up from the nightmare and step by step by step began to experience the love, connection, peace and harmony we'd been craving. We love that we get to create some of that magic and share those ways with you! In our celebration conversation, we touched on a range of topics including - life before meeting in November 2014, - friendship origins, - how we shrink geography, - what inspired Loving Difference, - acceptance, - knowing we'd be ok and - the limits of labels. You won't be surprised to hear that we didn't get through all your amazing questions so there will be a sequel!! Enjoy! ✨ ps. If you've run out of hope and ways, sign up for Revival Retreat via www.lovingdifference.net

    26. I can't be happy at all whilst everything is so terrible in my Neurodiverse relationship.

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2023 39:19


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're busting the myth that 'I can't be happy at all whilst everything is so terrible in my Neurodiverse relationship'. Many of our members arrive in Loving Difference hoping to resolve the challenges in their neurodiverse relationships, so that they can be happy again. We don't want our members to wait until they've resolved all their challenges in their relationship to be happy! We want that for them ASAP! In fact, we'd go further than that. We take the view that being happy (and we're mindful that there are so many nuances to that word!) is key to having a better experience in our neurodiverse relationships! We have so many stories and expectations about how a happy relationship = a happy me. But really it's the other way round. We believe A happy ME is a prerequisite to happy relationship! We're much more likely to be able to experience happiness in a relationship if we're able to create it for ourselves first. And we want to help our members discover ways to do that for themselves, even though we know it's a hard concept when they've arrived exhausted after years of persistent stress. And in any case, most have lost touch with who they are and what makes them happy. The truth we've realised is that happiness really does come from within and we have agency to create it without changing anyone else. And we are PASSIONATE about helping our members recover from persistent stress, exhaustion and unhealthy relationship dynamics and rediscover who they are and how they can resource themselves to experience more happiness. We hope you enjoy our conversation and are inspired and encouraged to start along your own journey to BE YOU, to recover from there stress of it all and to discover ways to have a better experience in your neurodiverse relationship ASAP! Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? A place that brings together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    25. It's too dangerous to hope in my neurodiverse relationship.

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2023 28:45


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode, we're busting the myth it's too dangerous to hope in my neurodiverse relationship. A member recently shared the following:- 'It's so encouraging to read also from people with similar first-hand experience, about the fears and doubts and then about the hope. Hope is something I had tried to let go of in recent years, because i experienced so many setbacks and one-way streets that it felt almost counter-productive to try and keep it alive.' In this podcast we recall how hope evaporated as our energy depleted as we tried various different strategies which didn't work and how our belief that things could get better was replaced by disappointment, resignation and, ultimately, despair. We lost hope that anything could get better in our Neurodiverse Relationships. So we totally get it when members arrive in exhaustion and despair and find it difficult to even dare to hope that things could get better. In fact, we often say to our members that we'll carry the hope for now. And we've got enough for all of you! We talk about the parallels between losing hope in our neurodiverse relationships and losing hope in our ability to make a difference in aspects like climate change. When all we hear is the problems, the enormity of it, the hopelessness of it, it feels impossible to make a difference, so why even bother? This can be what it feels like in our relationships too. So, how can we shift back into hope. And how can hope, when combined with agency and energy, create the motivation to keep going in our quest to have a better experience in our neurodiverse relationships? Join us in a conversation which is so close to our hearts and to our mission to bring hope to all those who are struggling in their neurodiverse relationships. Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? A place that brings together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    24. Can my experience change in my neurodiverse relationship if my partner doesn't change?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 5, 2023 24:15


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode, we're busting the myth that others need to change so that our experience is different. We used to think our experience was dependent on what others did or didn't do... and we've realised that's not true. Our waiting on others to change or hoping they'll change or expecting or believing they should change or trying to get them to change cost us our health and happiness, for years!... and we weren't prepared to do it that way anymore.. and we found a way that isn't dependent on that! Most of our listeners and Loving Difference members are working on changing their experience in their neurodiverse relationship/family without the support or involvement of their partner. This was us too and it meant we needed a different approach than all those we found at the time. That different approach not only transformed our own experience dramatically, it consequently changed the vibe and dynamics in the relationships with our partner and children. We've realised healthy relating that's prioritising loving connection doesn't force or expect others to change. What we can do instead is get into healthier relationship with ourself and then make healthier decisions and in relation to others based on what they are choosing to do or not do. We have healthier ways now to handle how different needs, preferences, capacities, values, tolerances can all be catered for in a relationship/family, also for accountability, 'unacceptable behaviour' and things that we believe or perceive others can't or won't do. In time, our partners and children changed how they related to us and that began a chain reaction that has created significantly more thriving individually and collectively in our relationships and families. Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? A place that brings together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    23. Will the support we need be there once my child has a diagnosis?

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 22, 2023 50:49


    www.lovingdifference.net Caution: please look after yourself for today's episode. There is discussion of suicide and the very desperate situations our young people experience and that we as parents can experience in our efforts to support them. If you need to, skip this one. We welcome your comments and questions about what we're sharing today. Get in touch via www.lovingdifference.net or email hello@lovingdifference.net. In this episode, we're responding to a recent BBC News article about the alarming numbers of young autistic people dying in the absence of the specialist support they need. You can read the article we're referencing at this link - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-66731265. We're specifically talking about our experience in the UK in this episode though we know that the issue of insufficient or inadequate support is not isolated to the UK. We support members globally in Loving Difference and hear about this from all countries. Efforts to change this are very very slow in coming and in the meantime, children's situations and life chances are being significantly affected. In our conversation we're busting the myth that diagnosis for our children leads to ‘all the support you need'. The reality for us and for so many families and their children is that the promises of support that have them battling and exhausting themselves for a diagnosis aren't there or are insufficient to support the needs of children and young people... and the very real experience that in the waiting time to diagnosis, the issues that began the process have become worse. We're sharing our own experiences as best we can whilst at the same time respecting the privacy of our children who experienced a lot of difficulties in childhood and as teenagers, particularly in the education system. We're also sharing some of the things that helped us to cope, recover and begin to thrive again as a family in spite of the absence and inadequacies of statutory care and support. We know we are some of the lucky ones. Our children are still here. They are still recovering in lots of ways and some of them are still really struggling and we're still in the struggle with them. The gift is that we have better ways now, ways that ensure we're well and that means we're in the best possible position to support them so much better than when we were exhausted, overwhelmed and in our own mental health crises. Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? A place that brings together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    22. Am I experiencing Cassandra Syndrome in my neurodiverse relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2023 30:43


    www.lovingdifference.net Caution: please look after yourself for today's episode. We realise this is a big topic we're bringing attention to today. We hope you're open to hearing some new thoughts that challenge narratives which, from our own experience, are based on outdated assumptions and stereotypes. Most important is knowing that we're here to validate ALL experiences and find new ways to see, understand and relate to them. These syndromes, typically applied to those identifying as neurotypical or non-autistic, were our doorways too so we're sharing our experiences and expanding them with the new insights and experiences we've encountered. We welcome your challenges, comments and questions about what we're sharing today. In this episode, we're busting the myth that Cassandra Syndrome (or Affection Deprivation Disorder or Ongoing Relationship Trauma Syndrome) only impacts NT women because of their autistic husband. We'll be sharing the descriptions of these collections of symptoms, We're sharing how we've noticed the not believing or invalidation of experience that characterises the syndrome's name is not an experience limited to one group of people or one neuro-identity. Understanding how invalidation of experience comes about, and that it is more universal than is traditionally discussed, can help us to find common ground AND new ways to validate ALL experiences, revitalise connections and rebuild relationship safety and trust. Listen along to our conversation to discover the truth that busted this myth for us! Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? A place that brings together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    21. Why do we take everything so personally in our neurodiverse relationships?

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 14, 2023 20:00


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're busting the myth that everything that's said is personal and we're all getting it wrong! It was prompted by a conversation we were having just before we started recording about how differently we receive and perceive information from others these days. it all started with Natalie's husband buying a new lasagne dish of all things!! For years so much of what was being said in our relationship and family situations was being taken personally with hundreds of accusations or perceptions of making all kinds of mistakes... there's a happier, healthier way. Listen to discover the truth that busted this myth for us! Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? A place that brings together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    20. Was I conned when I was dating in my neurodiverse relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2023 21:44


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're busting the myth that we were conned when we were dating and our partner isn't really who we fell in love with. This was a really pervasive myth that we discovered in the early days of neurodiversity arriving into our awareness and we know that many still see it that way. We realised it really affected the way we thought about our partner and definitely increased the levels of resentment, disappointment and disconnection we experienced. As we learned more about ourselves and about relationships, in ways we'd not been aware of before, we had some new thinking and perspectives to bring to this idea and it made a big difference to how we thought about and related to our partners. Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    19. Can I blame all the misunderstandings in my Neurodiverse Relationship on neurodiversity?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 27, 2023 47:24


    www.lovingdifference.net A lighter episode today, riffing on the trials and tribulations of countless misunderstandings that we've encountered in our neurodiverse relationships, with partners and children, and the truth of who and what we realised was showing up that we hadn't realised before! Why dinner could have became a meaning making disaster for Natalie last week. Why misunderstandings turn into a game of Meaning Ping Pong. What you can start to do about it all because we know it's exhausting and resentment, frustration and rage inducing without different ways to see it or deal with it. Stay on after the episode for an afterthought and some remembering from when we were blaming all the misunderstandings in our neurodiverse relationships on neurodiversity!! Want to learn more or join us on the road to being YOU and thriving in your own neurodiverse relationship or family? Join Loving Difference and check in to Revival Retreat at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Revival Retreat is an all-online, life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, to discover a new map, a proven route, empowering resources, sustainable solutions and all the support you need, hosted by accredited coaches who are also navigating difference in their relationships and family. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    18. Part 2 - Do I Need to Leave My Neurodiverse Relationship to Recover and Thrive?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2023 26:36


    www.lovingdifference.net Let's quickly recap Part 1! We shared that we've discovered lots of reasons why our needs weren't being met: Neurodiversity narratives Cultural narratives and unconscious expectations Experience of how how needs have been met in the past Plus lots of other contributing factors. The point is that there were lots of things and it wasn't as simple as ‘you can't or you're not meeting my needs and you should be'! Please do go back and listen to part 1! In this episode we're diving deeper to explore What even are needs?! Who is responsible for meeting needs? We discovered a myth inside the myth on this one and beyond that a new truth to live into that took step by steps and created a whole new experience for us! Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Hop into Revival Retreat, a self-paced and life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, but it feels impossible, confusing, or too hard to start to discover new perspectives and tools so that they can decide their next right step. Choose the Reignite Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    Be Beautiful YOU!

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 12, 2023 14:19


    www.lovingdifference.net What do you do ‘like breathing'? What gifts of yours have you lost touch with, rejected or tried to correct or fix? Natalie's solo in this episode from March a couple of years ago with reflections and words of encouragement on our uniqueness and gifts. Not knowing our gifts, forgetting them or perhaps worst of all, judging them harshly, is detrimental to our sense of self, our self-worth and ultimately our mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing. How could you begin to bring attention to and celebrate your gifts? Natalie has some ideas for you. If you'd welcome more support with this, we have a Coach Adventure dedicated to this inside Loving Difference. It's called The Gifts of Difference and is included in the free membership plan. If you've not joined us yet, head over to www.lovingdifference.net. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Hop into Revival Retreat, a fresh, new and ‘life-changing' place for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, but it feels impossible, confusing, or too hard to start to discover new perspectives and tools so that they can decide their next right step. It's all online. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    17. Aren't All Relationships Neurodiverse and the Main Issue Really is Mental Health?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 10, 2023 17:26


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode, we're sharing our thoughts and perspectives on a question from a Loving Difference member who wonders if really all relationships are neurodiverse and whether mental health is actually the main issue. We thought this would be relevant for those who watch or listen outside of Loving Difference so we thought we'd share it here too. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Hop into Revival Retreat, a self-paced and life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, but it feels impossible, confusing, or too hard to start to discover new perspectives and tools so that they can decide their next right step. Choose the Reignite Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    16. Part 1 - Do I Need to Leave My Neurodiverse Relationship to Recover and Thrive?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 8, 2023 34:55


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode, which is Part 1 because we realised we have a lot to say on it (!), we're busting the myth that your partner can't meet your needs so you'll need to leave the relationship to recover yourself and thrive.  It takes us back to the very beginning of our journey together in 2014 when we were reading and learning lots about the new land of neurodiversity we hadn't realised we were in. There are narratives and other contributing factors that we share plus the new truth we discovered and live these todays which has supported our recovery and supports greater understanding and connection in our relationships and families. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Hop into Revival Retreat, a self-paced and life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who want things to change, but it feels impossible, confusing, or too hard to start to discover new perspectives and tools so that they can decide their next right step. Choose the Revival Retreat Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    15. Myth Busting Challenge!

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 24, 2022 48:23


    www.lovingdifference.net We're back and it's time for a refresh and reinvention! Welcome to the Myth Busting Neurodiverse Relationships Podcast. In this first episode of a new season we're joined by Mona from Neurodiverse Love. We're going to bust as many myths about neuodiverse relationship as we can together in about 45 minutes!!! These are all myths that we had when we started this journey that we've realised aren't true and that were preventing us from recovering and having the relationships and connection with partners and children that we desperately wanted. We want to dispel these myths and bring you hope that absolutely things can change!! Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Hop into Reignite, a self-paced and life-changing coaching programme for anyone in a neurodiverse relationship who wants things to change, but it feels impossible, confusing, or too hard to start to discover new perspectives and tools so that they can decide their next right step. Choose the Reignite Plan at www.lovingdifference.net for more details and to sign up. Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    Employment, Special Interests and Communicating Your Needs

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2022 66:54


    www.lovingdifference.net Another collaborative episode with Mona from the Neurodiverse Love podcast. Many of us would love to turn our interests and passions into paid employment, however that isn't always possible. In this episode, we're sharing challenges we've experienced in school and employment and how we've worked to create ways to use our gifts and talents through paid employment, volunteering or hobbies. We're also sharing some of the challenges and experiences of our partners and children too. Knowing your needs and being able to ask for them in the your personal and professional relationships can be key to success. During this episode we talk about all these issues! Learn how to become the CEO of your own ‘Department of Wellbeing' and take small steps to do the things you love and are most passionate about. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. For more information about Neurodiverse Love, including their podcast and peer support group, check out their website at www.neurodiverselove.com What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    14. Why Can Birthdays Go So Badly In Neurodiverse Relationships?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 25, 2022 21:34


    www.lovingdifference.net Why is that birthdays can seem so tricky in our neurodiverse relationships? In this episode, Natalie and I reflect on some hard earned lessons around birthdays and how we have learned to navigate them. Unfortunately we didn't always have such an understanding of the differences and preferences operating in our families so birthdays became a source of disappointment, frustration and confusion as we tried to figure out why it seemed so hard. When we began to realise the extent of the anxiety that birthdays create, we shifted our expectations and were able to welcome in new ways of celebrating -  and of giving and receiving - even if none of it looks traditional! Enjoyed this episode? Follow us or subscribe so you don't miss an episode. We'd also appreciate you gifting us a moment of your precious time to rate the podcast so others find it too. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. For more information about Neurodiverse Love, including their podcast and peer support group, check out their website at www.neurodiverselove.com What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    13. How Can My Neurodiverse Family Survive The Education System?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 12, 2022 57:58


    www.lovingdifference.net A subject close to our hearts, the education system has been problematic for both our families. We are all still experiencing the repercussions of a system which did not meet the needs of our young people. As parents, we had to shift our mindset and change our priorities. We had to make mental and emotional health a priority over school. Stepping away from the social narratives around education can feel lonely, but we offer you hope and encouragement that learning can take place at any stage in life. We don't need to buy into the conditioning of age related expectations. So, if school is causing anxiety, meltdowns, shutdowns, overwhelm and unhappiness for your young people, please know that you are not alone. If your child is continuously in trouble because they struggle to focus or cannot control their impulsivity, you are also not alone. Neurodivergent young people are struggling in our school systems both here in the UK and elsewhere. Many are without school placements due to anxiety based school ‘refusal' or exclusion. We share what we changed to help our young people get through the system and to move on. Heather shares some tips on protecting yourself from the authorities in the event that your child is unable to attend school because of anxiety. Everyone needs to find their own path and make their own decisions, but if you want a safe and friendly place to explore this further, you will receive a warm welcome in Loving Difference. Come and join us. It's free to sign up! Enjoyed this episode? Follow us or subscribe so you don't miss an episode. We'd also appreciate you gifting us a moment of your precious time to rate the podcast so others find it too. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. For more information about Neurodiverse Love, including their podcast and peer support group, check out their website at www.neurodiverselove.com What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    Recognising Differences in Your Relationship and Getting Real About Your Feelings

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 1, 2022 66:05


    www.lovingdifference.net Really excited to share this episode with you!! Our first collaborative episode between the Loving Difference team and the Neurodiverse Love team. We'll be publishing collaborative podcast episodes throughout the year and look forward to sharing our different perspectives and the lived experiences we've had, as we all address both the strengths and differences in our neurodiverse relationships. In this episode, we're joined by Mona from Neurodiverse Love to share some of the differences we noticed in our relationships, that others did not experience.   In addition, we go deep on how important emotional boundaries are to reduce anger and resentment and how meeting your own needs and finding the things that bring you joy and peace, can move you towards reducing loneliness and depression. There's also a lot of great discussion about what really impacted us and our partners in our neurodiverse relationships and how we had to "become the change we wanted to see" to start creating the love relationships we wanted more of. Enjoyed this episode? Follow us or subscribe so you don't miss an episode. We'd also appreciate you gifting us a moment of your precious time to rate the podcast so others find it too. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. For more information about Neurodiverse Love, including their podcast and peer support group, check out their website at www.neurodiverselove.com What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    12. How Do I Get Through Family Events?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2022 14:42


    www.lovingdifference.net How Do I Get Through Family Events? How do you experience social events together - all wonderful or a complete nightmare? We've found them very challenging for all sorts of reasons including social anxiety, sensory processing differences, different interests and different capacities for socialising. In this episode we're sharing some of our Top Tips so that social events can become safer and more accessible and enjoyable for you and for your loved ones too. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    11. Why Are Mealtimes So Stressful In My Neurodiverse Home?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 29, 2022 26:55


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're challenging the social rules around meal times and explore why they are so challenging for our families. There are so many narratives around family meal times that made us feel that a “good” family should sit around the table together and have quality time. But we've had very different experiences with our families. It's not that we didn't want that for ourselves but the reality was that it wasn't quality time. It was stressful! Challenges with food textures; sensory seeking or sensory avoiding behaviours, overwhelm from the day, anxiety around eating in front of people, anxiety around eating at all, social anxiety, communication exhaustion, sound sensitivities around eating noises and/or cutlery scraping the plates, difficulties sitting still…. all this, and more made family mealtimes stressful and exhausting. We still sit in meetings or hear people pushing families to spend quality time around the table with their neurodivergent loved ones without any consideration as to why they are finding it so difficult. It's time that we give ourselves permission to make our own rules around meal times. I know that we have and it has made a big difference to the stress levels in the home. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach #neurodiverserelationshipcoach #neurodiversefamilycoach

    10. How Do I Begin When I'm Exhausted?

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2022 9:25


    www.lovingdifference.net In this bitesize episode we're reassuring you that change is possible even when you're feeling totally exhausted by everything and possibly also scared to change anything in your neurodiverse relationships. Perhaps you also have change fatigue, you're done with changing yourself, feeling like the only one's who's trying to make things work better or for your family members to get along better. We know the exhaustion. We know the fear. We know the resentment. We know the fatigue with all of it. There is a way! A way to being you again. A way to step by step moving out of the totally exhausted state you're in so that you have capacity for other step by step changes that are aligned with who you are and which ultimately, all your loved ones benefit from. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @loving.difference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach

    9. Resolving The Top 10 Challenges In Your Neurodiverse Relationship

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2022 5:26


    www.lovingdifference.net What are the Top 10 Challenges in our Neurodiverse Relationship and how can we resolve them? We have identified the 10 most frequently occurring challenges which we, and our members, have experienced and created a 10 modules course to help you focus on, and resolve these challenges. Each module is a collection of articles, videos, tools, tips and strategies for you to work through at your own pace. In addition, you have the opportunity to join our live bi-monthly coach conversations in which we focus on one of the challenges. Can't make it live? No problem. You can submit your questions in advance and watch the replay. Now is a perfect time to join us as we begin to work through the modules starting with :- - Where does my energy go? followed by - Boundaries - What gives us energy? - Trust building with the ones we love - Togethering - Roots to freedom - Love has different languages too - Pace - Communication - Resentment Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @lovingdifference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach

    8. Am I Defensive In My Neurodiverse Relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 10, 2021 17:35


    www.lovingdifference.net Do you recognise that your partner (and/or your neurodivergent children) are in a defensive state? When Natalie and I first came across the term defence mode in relation to our partners and children, it was clear to us that this was a big factor in what we were finding challenging. It made total sense and brought a new level of understanding. However, what we weren't so quick to see, was how our own defensive patterns were contributing to the situation. This is partly because it is harder to have self awareness and we were so focussed on looking outside of ourselves for understanding and solutions rather than inwardly reflecting. It was also because the traditional, better known fight/flight defence states didn't seem to apply to us. As we began to learn how these and other lesser known defensive states can present, we began to realise that we, too, have our defensive patterns. And that these were a big factor in the relational challenges that we were experiencing. In this conversation we talk about how fight/flight can present in ways you may not have recognised, as well as discussing the lesser know states of freeze, fawn and flop. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @lovingdifference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach

    7. How Does Loving Difference Help In My Neurodiverse Relationship

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 26, 2021 12:26


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we share what helped and hindered our recovery and how this inspired the mission and purpose for Loving Difference as somewhere to find new ways where we may otherwise be feeling hopeless and thinking there are none to be found! Without new ways, we continue to be stuck, frustrated and miserable. Loving Difference brings together a combination of professional and peer support, coaching and community so that members can recover themselves and their relationship with awareness, tools and strategies, combined with the mutual support we both found invaluable for our step by steps. Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @lovingdifference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach

    6. Myths We've Busted In Our Neurodiverse Relationship

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 12, 2021 24:23


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're busting some of the myths that we read/learnt from professionals when our neurodiverse journey began, including: - That we were suffering from a reactive disorder that comes with names of its own - That we are like we are because of our neurodivergent partners - That neurodivergence was the problem so nothing could change with the relationship - That we couldn't recover if we stayed in the relationship - That our partners couldn't change - That we'd have to change more Subsequently we learnt that: - We could reverse the effects of the reactive disorder/stress we'd been experiencing - Our partners were suffering too - we weren't the only ones experiencing a stressful reaction in the relationship - Our inherited relationship models and dynamics were unhealthy and unhelpful - We could find ways to meet our own needs without leaving the relationship - Our recovery helped to reduce the stress our partners were experiencing - We can be more ourselves AND improve our relationship - after all that's the person they fell in love with! - We can create better connection even if our partners aren't prepared or ready to join is in the work We realised that we needed to learn about relationship dynamics, trauma, wellbeing, communication and so many other things! It's not all or only about neurodiversity. - You have agency to change yourself and the situation that you're in - You can thrive and sparkle - You can do it inside the relationship - There is support for you in Loving difference Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @lovingdifference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach

    5. How Polyvagal Theory Helps In Neurodiverse Relationships

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 29, 2021 31:23


    In this episode we're introducing Polyvagal Theory and the impact it's had on our neurodiverse relationships. Our nervous systems have a huge impact on our relationship with ourselves, with others and with our environment. Trauma, unmet needs, a lack of belonging or fitting in, as well as many other factors, establish our defensive patterns from childhood. The more we experience life from these defensive states, the harder it is to access a sense of safety where we can be open, curious, creative and connected. The amazing thing is that we can, with practice, learn ways to shift our state and interrupt those defensive patterns which no longer serve us. If we can become more regulated, less defensive and more self-aware, we'll have a different experience. We'll also will give out more clues of safety. This in turn can influence the state of others through the process of co-regulation. So doing our own nervous system work can help those around us. And, ultimately, we benefit from our loved ones being able to access a safe and connected state. It's a WIN WIN! In this episode, we discuss: - What is Polyvagal Theory and why is it relevant in our neurodiverse relationships? - What are the different pathways of the nervous system? What do we mean by a “defensive state” and “defence mode”? - What is neuroception and why is it important? - How can we use this awareness to bring greater understanding, empathy and connection to our relationships? - How can we start to build in more capacity so that we are less likely to be reacting from a defensive state? - How can we reflect, repair and reconnect if our defences take over in the moment? - How can we use this knowledge to create safety around everyday life and events that challenge us or/and our partners and/or children? Want to learn more? Join Loving Difference FREE at https://www.lovingdifference.net/ Follow us on IG @lovingdifference or on Facebook. What is Loving Difference? We're an online membership community bringing together anyone looking for new ways to live in neurodiverse relationships, with a focus on living well together with difference. Loving Difference is hosted by Coaches with experience navigating life with difference. We guide members to learn about themselves and their loved ones in a safe, non-judgmental community so that we can inspire and encourage each other to love the unconventional and beautiful differences in ourselves and in our homes. #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #love #neurodiversecouple #coach

    4. Am I Experiencing Gaslighting In My Neurodiverse Relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 15, 2021 60:45


    www.lovingdifference.net Content Warning: we talk in this episode about gaslighting and trauma. Look after yourself and if this isn't for you, skip it this time. It's important to seek help and support for the impact of all kinds of experiences that look and feel like gaslighting, whatever the intent. At the same time, we're having this conversation to expand the ways we talk about our neurodiverse experience and, as such we're here to hold space for the paradox that is the pain of life alongside the joy and hope of it too. We can honour both and invite you to join us with compassion and an open mind. In this episode we're sharing and exploring our experience of and perspectives on gaslighting, including: - how and when we've encountered the concept of gaslighting on our journeys with neurodiversity, when it was unknown and since we've known - how it features in neurodiverse narratives and whether this is the right or a helpful term to be using for our experiences - how gaslighting and alternative perspectives on it have helped us understand ourselves and our relationship dynamics and experience - what's the potential issues with using this concept for our experiences and what other ideas and language have helped us, and also influenced our relationships more positively ‘Gaslighting' potentially simplifies a more complex experience in neurodiverse relationships. This doesn't make it irrelevant or absent. We‘re keen to challenge the dominant narrative and expand the conversation in a way that can ensure individuals find the support they need and also open up new routes through our experiences with our partners and families. Join Loving Difference FREE - coaching and community for your neurodiverse relationship www.lovingdifference.net #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #neurodiversecouple #coach

    3. Am I Resilient Or Exhausted In My Neurodiverse Relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2021 32:58


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we're unpacking resilience including... What is resilience? What does resilience have to do with our experience in neurodiverse relationships? What is survival resilience and thriving resilience? How is our nervous system and our wellbeing impacted by the resilience story we're living? What's the cultural story/narrative around resilience that the majority of us are living in? How can we begin to cultivate healthier resilience? What are the first steps when it feels like we can't change anything? In Loving Difference we support the recovery many of us need from the relentless stress we're experience in our lives so that we can begin to cultivate healthy resilience. Free membership, no contracts… join us at www.lovingdifference.net #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #neurodiversecouple #coach

    2. Why Is Communication So Difficult in My Neurodiverse Relationship?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2021 20:44


    www.lovingdifference.net Communication is in the Top 3 challenges we hear about most! Why is it so difficult? In this episode, we share our experiences of communication before we knew about neurodiversity in our relationships and some of the awareness and strategies that can help you improve communication.. whether your partner's on board or not! Do you experience these in your neurodiverse relationship? - Defensive and avoidant communication - Living with negativity bias - Emotional reactivity - Communication anxiety - Invalidation - Hamster wheel conversations that go round and round - Communication confusion and upset Setting up communication to be successful rather than stressful for everyone involved. Improving communication without changing others or needing others to change. Finding a third way of communicating where no one has to shape-shift and everyone's needs are met. To learn Compassionate Communication with us in Loving Difference, join us FREE at www.lovingdifference.net and then sign up to a forthcoming course once you're inside www.lovingdifference.net #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #asd #autismspectrumdisorder #autismawareness #aspergers #autism #dontletanyonedullyoursparkle #aspergersrelationship #mentalhealth #happyrelationship #neurodiverserelationship #cultivateyourhappiness #beyouagain #beyou #liveslow #livewithintent #autismspectrum #neurodiverselove #lovingdifference #adhd #neurodiversecouple #coach

    1. Introducing Loving Difference

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 7, 2021 15:08


    www.lovingdifference.net In this episode we reflect on our journeys recovering from exhaustion, resentment and hurt to THRIVING in our neurodiverse relationships and homes. We chat about how we felt inspired to create a membership community for everyone in neurodiverse relationships to provide the support and resources to help others reconnect with themselves and with their loved ones so that they can THRIVE.

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