WHAT WAS HER NAME

This episode with Courtney we talk all things, post settlement, intuition, finding therapists, daddy Guise guided as caring father, concept of "you don't have to leave", Erosion and effects of abusive dynamics on children

I am joined by my guest Roxanne who invites us into her story of full circle redemption. We talk all things savior complexes within abusive dynamics, sex addiction, comparison/lust, spiritual abuse, narcissism and more. This episode is powerful for many reasons, but I love that we're starting here. Because it's set the pace for a total redemption story. A full 180. As we unpack spiritual abuse within a church, and the difficulty separating covenant and grace from accountability and safety. Along with hidden addictions carried into marriage, abuse of authority, and toxic submission. This is SUCH A GOOD STORY. I am honored to hold Roxannes story here. Big win here.

Okay. Hi my friends. This is the final episode to season 5. It is a solo episode, because God had others plans. My guest I'd prepared felt a halt on her heart, and did a little rerouting. This episode is really raw. I recorded this episode from my childhood bedroom, and it's about as real as it gets over here. I've treaded lightly within What was her name when it comes to God. Mainly because I know that there are many wounded by the church here, including me. However I want you to know that I'm sort of “reshaping” my vision here. I did something called an “inner healing” recently and it changed my life. So much so that I texted the woman who did it after and was like, “when can we do another one?!” and since did more. These series of inner healings gave God permission to touch and heal what therapy couldn't. I've tried everything, for years. And while I'm a big advocate for therapy, it can not be your only source of healing. God is the one true healer and he healed memories and lifted a pain supernaturally. And I believe in what happened in these inner healings so much that I have a team actually willing to offer an inner healing for you. I will never not talk about how God healed something in me that could literally only be healed by the healer himself. And I want this for you too. But more importantly he wants this for you. You do not have to live as some trauma bird for the rest of your life. He has freedom for you from that pain. And he wants to replace what has been taken from you. - Joel 2 25-27: will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you. “You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the LORD your God, who has dealt wondrously with you.”  There's so much gold in this episode. I'm standing with you all. I am so grateful for this community. Here is to the end of eason 5! Big love.  If you are interested in doing an inner healing, please dm me. 

Hi dear friends. This week Mamma Caroline and I are talking all the things, literally. You all submitted a series of questions from how to file an restraining order, dating post abuse, how long to transition from talking to dating, parenting challenges in shared custody + more. It's a genuine joy to gather with my mamma mentor and talk all things that will help you feel better equipped in cultivating a beautiful healthy life post abuse.

I am joined with guest Callie Porteus as we talk things love bombing, the wheel of abuse, vulnerability in its relation to being susceptible to abuse, mental health, substance abuse, violence and more.

I am joined with guest, Melanie Liparulo as we discuss all things narcissistic abuse, entrapment within marriage, dating post abuse and more.

Caroline and I took a question submitted by you all on stalking. Caroline shares all things stalkers, resources, tools, and hacks.

Christina Pierce's story of the fight for the unjust removal of her children. We talk all things abuse, financial abuse, sociopathy, splitting, unhinged episodes and more. So we don't forget your story, we hold it in this space.

Caroline and I go unscripted as I rack her brain in an attempt to put a name to condescending male humor. I officially will now label the "It's just a joke" jokes under Romance Broasting from this point on. We talk romance, jokes some men make at the expense of women, intergenerational perspectives, honoring our bodies, and how to identify if you may have been or are currently being romantically broasted.

An episode to make your Monday coffee taste even better. Caroline and I talk all things court, female judges (side eye) , documenting in court, learning which battles to pick and ignore in court, preparing your nervous system, court hacks to not loose your shit, and more! This episode we both sat a tad bit tired from the recent hearing this week and much happening here in our community- it took a different turn as we processed the outcomes and Caroline shares insight that for some may not be new but others an essential in the aftermath of abuse. If you know a woman navigating the judicial system send over this episode and help others to not learn through this and error if they don't have to. NOW STREAMING

(Trigger warning: physical abuse, strangulation) This episode I'm joined with influencer Elena Sorentino, as she steps out of her comfort zone and opens up with us about her story. You may have followed Elena as a pediatric language pathologist on tiktok and instagram! Today she's opening up about her story with domestic abuse. We discuss physical abuse, strangulation, and more. This story shaped my heart, bring out the Kleenex because this one is a tear jerker.

Join me and my guest Caroline Markle-Hammond for our very first mamma Monday episode. We're airing our mentoring session unfiltered just for you. This episode we talk all things online dating, learning to listen to our bodies, mens distorted views on women bodies, honoring our intuition, saying no, weeding out assholes, getting up from the table and the un-squashing. Stay PEELED MY BANANA FRIENDS for a new Mamma Monday episode airing every Monday!! ** Our survivors story still air every Thursday as well. Love you guys you wild brilliant brave WOMEN. 

We jump back into the story of Grace. Where we talk all things rape within a romantic relationship, spiritual abuse, and a spiritual freedom too.

TW: Sexual assault Grace and I talk all things, sexual assault within a romantic partnership, drug abuse, toxic loyalty, and more. We navigate the realms of "slow grow" manipulation that leaves many women with the whiplash from abuse. WE DIVE DEEP into sexual coercion, rape within a romantic relationship and how that manifested in abuse. This conversation we touch on a variety of topics such as toxic loyalty, abandoning self, and more. Stay awake for Part 2 coming in the next days.

Often we feel as though abuse is a one and done. As if we'd done our due diligence and are exempt from any further negative relationship. But in the navigating, I've learned that just because something is safe doesn't mean it's healthy. Without learning how to listen to our bodies we won't know how to honor it. And in the dishonoring we often find ourselves in repetitive circumstances that make it feel impossible to know if what we're encountering is our past trauma or present intuition. And while I'd wish to never have to record another story as such, it's a piece of my story that is to be kept in this space. Because one encounter does not make you immune, and your story or stories - matter. 

An episode where I dive deep with my good friend Serena Baney. She shares her abuse story how emotional and psychological abuse IS abuse. From gaslighting, cheating, deception, stonewalling, and more.

I had the opportunity to interview guest Kelly Weber, trauma certified Somatic massage therapist and Fitness coach. This episode I sat with covid (ha) and Kelly as we dive deep into her story. It's unique as we touch on the correlation between our upbringing and the interwoven impact it has on our romantic relationships as adults. Beginning with her childhood Kelly navigates abandonment issues, substance abuse, familial abuse and more. We navigate her youth as a teen mom and adoption. As we travel alongside her story we're invited into the traumatic abuse she endured that nearly took her and her child's life. This complex story will leave you moved by a resilient woman who has and is breaking Generational cycles for herself and her daughter. .

tw: miscarriage ** This episode I got to talk to one of my dear friends and we touch on so many topics within abuse. Legalism in the church, how abusive men hide behind scripture, how cheating can be covert abuse, miscarriages and more. Join me and Sophie as we delve into her story and everything in between.

tw: miscarriage ** This episode I got to talk to one of my dear friends and we touch on so many topics within abuse. Legalism in the church, how abusive men hide behind scripture, how cheating can be covert abuse, miscarriages and more. Join me and Sophie as we delve into her story and everything in between.

Jill opens up about her experience with her abusive partner. How what started as love bombing and euphoria quickly spiraled into her worst nightmare. We discuss the healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms in which we set up to survive abuse. Along with the guilt and shame that comes from the trauma bond you feel with them even after you leave.

Part 2 Brittney and I talk about the aftermath of abuse, Dr. Jeckel and Mr. Hyde, gaslighting and how it impacts your ability to trust your intuition. We discuss post abuse an how often aftermath can feel even more agonizing than being in the abusive relationship itself. 

Confessions of a pastors wife, true confessions from a woman who at one point sat beside her pastor husband in the pews, silently. To now a brave mother fucking single mother coming forward telling her story. We discuss sexual assault within marriage/coercion and how just because you don't identify with the woman in the dark alleyway - coercion is not a pure form of intimacy. We talk about expectations within the church as "submissive wives" to give our bodies to our husbands and the shame/toxicity that joins alongside. We discuss covert abuse, gaslighting, manipulation and more. This episode had me in tears, changed forever by Brittneys story. Thank you for sharing your story. Let us be impacted and I am honored to hold your story here.

TW: Abuse, SA, Custody  Tess shares her story with us for the first time. We walk through abuse and how it manifests as a “slow grow”. We talk about SA in a 6 year long relationship and how we need to remove the notion that to be assaulted only happens in a dark alleyway. How we're missing the mark as a society asking women “Why they stayed?” rather than asking men “Why they abuse?” We discuss financial abuse and the way that women are stripped of their independence in order to be dependent on the man. All things post separation abuse and how abuse doesn't end after abuse when you share children. Thank you Tess for opening up your story to us here at What was her name, we love you!

An episode answering all of your questions that you've submitted on tik Tok. We talk all things family court, custody, restraining orders and more with Carina Reyna.

A 60 minute free consultation so you don't have to. Don't let trial and error be the reason you have a misstep. Strategize and take notes to prepare yourself for what to expect and everything in between

Best selling author, Cassandra Speer joins me in discussing all things worth + value, affirmation addiction, the war in your mind, and how to identify worldly ways in which we find our identity and how to release ourselves from this wrestling. This is for you if you're wounded and wandering.

This episode is dedicated to friends and family. On what could be hurting more than helping. What to say, do, and all the in between. Love talking to my mentor mamma on this messy and magical topic.

On August 23. 2021 2 years ago today, a blood clot traveled up to my brain stopping the blood flow and nearly took my life. At 25 years old I had a stroke that left me paralyzed on my left side, blind in my left eye, short term memory loss, and paresthesia on the left side of my body from my toes to my head. I had to re-learn how to walk, use my left arm, and regain my cognitive function - all in silence. I was forced to quit my full time job, drop out of college, all while raising my boy as a single mother without any child support that year as I fought for not just my life but his. For 2 years I have masked my disability as I navigate family court in pursuit of full custody of my child. After years of strenuous physical, occupational, and speech therapy I am now at a place where my recovery has “peaked” according to science. (not God) Today I have lasting symptoms of numbness on my entire left side, no motor control in my left arm, and short term memory loss. But, I am alive. I am living proof that you do not need bruises to be abused. That emotional and psychological abuse can in fact kill you as the high amount of stress was a factor in my stroke.  This is my living testimony and the miraculous ways in which God has weaved in and out of my journey with his handprints in everything.  I want to thank Sarah and Austin Drake for adding joy to my hospital room, John Dillon for watching movies with me despite not being able to really “see” or “comprehend” it (lol) Amber for bringing me sushi so that I could get a break from rehab food. Pastor Jared Bridge and Anchor church for putting together meal trains and praying for me in the hospital. Nadia for bringing me Starbucks every week and being my friend in the high places and the lowest places. Kate and Justin for being willing to care long term for my son if I had died. My mom for caretaking over me and my son. Brayden for loving me and showing me that my disability doesn't take away from my worth and pushing me to continue healing. Rebekah Choi for her encouragement as an OT to encourage me not to give up as my healing point has “peaked”. My neurologist Dr. Girotra at UNMH for caring for me and advocating for me. And every single physical therapist, occupational therapist, and speech therapist at Encompass and Press Health plex that  joined my team to help me rebuild my life again. I have mad respect for professionals in this field and I do not know where I would be without your commitment to my healing. 

This episode is featuring therapist, Trevor Hansen. As known by the art of healing podcast. This episode we discuss what it looks like to reparent your wounded inner child, how to not get stuck in a victim mindset, how to identify an anxious attachment style and what tools you can apply to gain a secure attachment style. I really loved this episode with Trevor and I guarantee you will want to grab a pen and notebook for this insightful episode. To join the anxious attachment club go to : http://theartofhealingbytrevor.showit.site

An episode where we discuss the not so obvious signs of anxiety, ptsd, and depression. We discus tools on how to cope and heal. This episode focuses on the doubt that survivors often feel after leaving the relationship and the inner battle as many fight for their a system to side with them in pursuit of safety for themselves and or their children. Melissa Buesing is a therapist specializing in individual, couples and family therapy, and maintains a private practice in Mansfield, Texas. A little bit about Melissa, she is a born and raised Texan! She loves to spend time with her son, family, and being outside!  Her educational backgrounds include achieving her B.A in Psychology from Texas Woman's University and an M.A. from Dallas Baptist University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor through the Texas State Board. Melissa's therapeutic approach in strongly rooted in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. She uses up to date evidenced based practices and tailors to each individuals goals and needs. 

On this episode I am interviewing Tina Swithin where we talk about he alienation industry, reunification camps, and the current human trafficking happening before our very eyes to our children within this camps. Who is Tina: Tina Swithin is the author of Divorcing a Narcissist (series), founder of One Mom's Battle and the High Conflict Divorce Coach Certification Program. Tina Swithin continues to champion children's rights through her family court advocacy. Tina is working to raise awareness of the issues in the family court system and to educate the general public on post separation abuse, narcissistic abuse and the "alienation industry." Tina is a cofounder of the organization, ⁠nationalsafeparents.org⁠ and volunteers her time helping with family court reform through awareness, education and improved legislation such as Kayden's Law. 

This episode I am joined by a fellow domestic abuse survivor who speaks on how she navigated the legal system after abuse and tactics/steps in which she was able to obtain full freedom. We talk strategy. What to do if you just left an abusive relationship and what steps to take.

This is me at 11 at night sitting on my bed, it's giving big sister and I'm ready to have a late night heart to heart. Here's to an episode on when life isn't how you expected, where your dreams started feeling impractical and how to move forward past stagnancy while cultivating dreams along the way.

This episode I'm joined with my therapist Dr. Carl Russel where we discuss how the central nervous system is affected by abuse/trauma. Dr. Carl gives insight on identifying neurological hypersensitivity and how to cope with a dysregulated nervous system as well as heal. If you wrestle with triggers, questioning your perception constantly or can't escape fight flight or freeze this episode is most definitely for you. Streaming on all platforms!

This episode I discuss with my therapist, Dr. Carl Russel a pastor who also worked as a police officer in law enforcement. He shares what the Bible says about divorce and we dig into the context and face the statement that "abuse breaks covenant." We talk about how submission has been mistaken for domination and how that taints the idea of Godly submission with marriage. I open up about the spiritual experience I encountered and how I've had to reshape the incorrect theology. If you are a Christian and unsure if what your experiencing is grounds for divorce this episode is for you. If you have been hurt by the church or are maybe a pastor or mentor I'd urge you to listen to this episode.

This podcast I interview Amy Fiedler, a certified trauma support specialist and certified holistic life coach. We discuss not trusting our intuition after abuse, self sabotage, what happens to the central nervous system after abuse, how feeling safe can actually trigger you, and steps in how to be able to receive healthy love after abuse.

This episode Kael opens up about her personal story with domestic abuse. She shares her current experience as she battles the courts midst a custody battle. Her son KJ currently is being leveraged in a custody case and Kael continues to fight for her motherhood. We talk all things abuse, post separation abuse, the aftermath of abuse and more.

Caroline Cambrus shares her story of domestic abuse she endured in 1964. This episode she provides insight into women's rights within the 1960's. We discuss how misogny impacted motherhood for her and hindered her from cultivating a life for herself outside of being a housewife. This magical wonderful treasured human opens up our eyes to strategy midst a system fighting against victims. Caroline shares her life with us and encourages us through the way she herself has paved for other women. Caroline's story is unmatched, tune in to honor her by listening to her story. Her name was Caroline.

This episode I've had the opportunity to interview Tabitha , the mother of Mackenzie Anderson. Tabitha tragically lost her daughter Mackenzie when she was stabbed 20 times to death, fighting her last breath until police arrived rescuing her one year old little boy at the scene. This podcast is about hearing the stories of those who've endured domestic abuse, and in memory of the individuals we've lost to it. I'm honored to speak with Tabitha and give a space here for Mackenzie's story. In tribute of Mackenzie Anderson, we hear her story. We know her name, it was Mackenzie Anderson.

Trigger warning: abuse, violence, child sexual abuse, insestual abuse, graphic

Trigger warning: graphic, physical violence Ashley shares her story and experience with physical violence. We open up a conversation regarding youth and the trap many teens walk into of abuse. Ashley goes in depth about her abuse that lets us into a discussion about physical violence. Abuse isn't only limited to adults and we carry a dialogue about teen violence, teen pregnancy, and more.

Trigger warning *** (emotional, psychological, graphic, severe sexual abuse, human trafficking)

A new episode is up and airing “Liar Liar pants on fire”. I had the opportunity to interview “Be like Abigail” on the podcast this week. Once upon a time girl meets guy, girl falls in love and gets married only to uncover guy is hiding his identity and not who he says he is. In fact he's led a completely different life and on their honeymoon rocks her world upside down. Listening to this story I held onto my seat as she unpacked the discoveries she found over the course of their 20 years of their marriage. We talk all things: con-artist, narcissism, re-marriage and blended families, post separation abuse, co-parenting, faith through trials, and more TW: rape

This is my story with domestic violence. I experienced psychological, mental, emotional, spiritual, and financial abuse. I was married to a man I'd met on a christian missionary base and I open up about our abusive marriage held behind closed doors.

Join me as I speak with a Yvonne a social worker/therapist who openly speaks about her abusive marriage within the christian church. We're talking all things abuse without bruises. Abandonment issues. And how our family structures can impact our relationships in the future.

Dear Diary - Brittany x

A computer wiz meets nice girl and we live happily ever... oh wait is it fate or have you been watching me? Listen to mine and Sara's conversation about cyber stalking, and one of if not the most bizarre stories I've heard yet. n** trigger warning, knives, abuse, content may be triggering **

A story of an ex ministers wife who spent over a decade married to her abusive husband. Michelle spent over a decade suffering silently behind closed doors unknowingly the victim of domestic abuse. We will discuss the toxic role churches have and currently play within condoning abuse inside the lines of covenant. As well as how "submission" has been misused as a tactic to keep a a goodly wife silent or obedient and the very real spiritual abuse at play here. Join us in this heartfelt, raw conversation where we talk about a topic a lot of people in church well... simply won't touch. We talk about what to do when you don't relate to that woman on that one domestic violence poster, and the effects psychological abuse can have on ones body and spirit.

Males can be particularly unlikely to report and come forward because victims are thought to be weak, vulnerable, unable to protect themselves and in need of help or assistance. These attributes conflict with many males' definitions of what it means to be a ‘strong' man in contemporary society. This is a topic really untouched in my opinion. When a guy is assaulted by a female, male victims may be afraid they will not be believed. And I think we as a society need to reevaluate our own viewpoints surrounding this topic. Because I know for me much of my own beliefs are a result of either media and or my upbringing.And it really wasn't until I started advocating on behalf of survivors that I realized advocating didn't pertain only to women but men too. It's been this un-talked about subject and I think it's time to learn from this, recognize assault is assault, and rid ourselves of the gender based stigma paired with men victim to sexual assault. Brenden I'm super thankful you agreed to share your story. Being able to not only hear this ‘story' but the testimony that God did within your life is incredible. You're paving the way for others and in turn helping others feel not so alone. This episode is now streaming on apple podcast & spotify

Part 2, Elissa Wall from Netflix's Keep Sweet Pray and Obey continues her story of her experience within the FLDS and the arranged marriage to her cousin at a young 14 who sexually assaulted her for years.

(This episode will continue next week for part 2!) I feel very honored to have been able to talk with Elissa Wall for Ep. 9 on the podcast. You may have seen Elissa on Netflix's documentary ‘Keep sweet pray & obey'. This documentary sheds light on Warren Jeff who initiated a cult within the FLDS. Elissa opens up about her personal story as a child bride given away at a young 14 years old to her older cousin who abused and raped her for years. Elissa talks about the brainwashing, trauma, and what gave her the bravery to testify against a multi million dollar organization ultimately catapulting the fall of Warren Jeff.