Cycling Odysseys

"Yes, yes, in much the same way how some now think the Giro-Tour double is back to being impossible or at least shall never be done again because of the steep competition, so some thought Liege-Bastogne-Liege would never again be won on La Redoute. Ah! But surely no reasonable limits can bound Titans when they Clash in the Second Golden Age of Cycling."

"There was no way to lay back in the armchair at ease, most viewing must have been bolt upright with every muscle tensed. It was a beautiful moment where the primal senses and instincts of Man were fused with modern gamesmanship and technology in the heat of a cunning competition that was as epic as any quest or gladiatorial melee of forgotten yore. (An Author's Note: Why, O! Why, can't such stakes ever be felt at Average Amstel?). "

"Allow me to introduce another award....I draw upon the idea of Ace Fighter Pilots."

Must watch before listing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ru3vGR8nck&t=336s

"It had not been seen for a generation, but finally in this Autumnal edition it commenced once more: a muddy Roubaix. There are very few sporting events guaranteed to be compelling drama and griping viewing, but a muddy Paris-Roubaix, a proper Sunday in Hell, is one of them."

"To peel back the deeper dramatic narrative layers of a Monument or a Grand Tour is easier than peeling an onion, but for certain Classics like Average Amstel I find that deeper-narrative-peeling-process to be rougher than shucking corn. Perhaps this is a “Me” problem, but I can't recall anyone else drawing out a compelling narrative from Average Amstel either (save in 2019)."

"Scheldeprijs is a weird race for me, I don't exactly understand where it fits and how to classify it, or perhaps it has multiple identities. Sometimes it acts as a bona fide Flandrien Cobbled Classic and is won by the likes of Peter Van Petegem or Servais Knaven, despite being very flat near Antwerp and the Dutch border with relatively benign cobbled sectors. And sometimes it really does act like the unofficial sprinters' world championships...It was only with 24 hours' digestion after its 2022 completion that I even decided to cover Scheldeprijs this year, because the winner made me smile, and embodied this dividing line classification conundrum."

"They had Clashed like Titans creating earthquakes and thunderstorms for the past 50km in front of the best fans in cycling who ate up every minute of it and brought the best of these Titans themselves. It had been an epic battle for which this podcast was exactly created to commemorate."

"Yes, this is the beauty of cycling: no race is the same.....Even this race's half-brother, the Volta a Catalunya will be highly distinguishable from this one—none would ever mistake Catalunya's High Mountain days with the spicy hills of this region.....Of course I speak of a race that grows all viewing hearts bigger: the Itzulia the locals now call it, having rejected the Spanish Pais Vasco title, in English we call it the Tour of the Basque Country."

"It is the Flemish people that still hold the crown of greatest cycling fans. These are the people who come out in force to cheer on the Monument passing near their towns. These are the people who all tune in so well to such a Monument that it gets better ratings than the Americans' Superbowl: surely, the figures would be 100% of Flemish viewers if such a large share of their population did not watch from the roadside in person."

"Finally, to conclude this long double narrative reflection on a long weekend Cobbled Double Header, I wish to reflect on the recurring Revelation process in cycling. Why do we all universally love to see these narratives play out? Why do they so excite and move us? What are we to make of them?"

Back to Belgium and Flanders for the next set prestigious Cobbled Classics.

Very Tardy in getting this one out. Apologies.

In honor of Matej Mohoric's Sanremo/Descenders' "Worlds" win is an episode from last year in which Mohoric has a starring role.

"In pro cycling there are about 2.5-to-3 unofficial Sprinters' World Championships annually at Scheldiprijs, of old Paris-Tours, and of course on the Champs-Elysees on the last stage of the Tour. There is that 100km Taiwan KOM Challenge that makes a good case to be the unofficial Hill Climb Worlds. Over the course of this podcast and others unofficial Raincoat World Championships have been highlighted. But today, it is time to discuss in depth, what has been the unofficial Descenders' World Championships since at least 1992 with Sean Kelly's archetypal descent to victory, down the Poggio at the end of Milano-Sanremo, the first Monument of the year."

Yes, you have heard me rightly—it was not a typo—even still today in this modern era of shorter but more intense racing, still the Milan-Sanremo bucks such trends and keeps its full 300 km race distance. Unlike so many races that no longer live up to their name ... O! It is quite a hellish day in the saddle to be sure, the longest day of the year. O! How the distance saps the legs, it is a war of attrition unlike any other on the calendar. And yet, despite the length ... Sanremo is considered the Sprinters' Monument: not because a pure sprinter always wins, but because this is the only Monument a pure sprinter can hope to win.

Another one....I can't believe this exists.....but I love it. Hope you all enjoy and have found a new reliable corned beef recipe.

"But at this year's 2022 Tirreno-Adriatico, neither Mighty Ace attended. Quickstep's World Champion Musketeer Julian Alaphilippe was not yet on top form. And Young Beowulf Crowned King Tadej Pogacar (UAE) was so dominant it was no contest. The rival French Paris-Nice stage race, the Race to the Sun, fully outshone Neptune's stage race that dared to fully overlap this year. Thus, the score has become: Neptune 1….Patrick 1."

"Congratulations to the other stage winners and victors of this week, but the most dominant storyline of this year's Paris-Nice was the most dominant team, the Jumbo-Visma Wasps. The storyline is somewhat disjointed, but there were many things to takeaway. "

Let us recall what was the Greatest Edition of Neptune's Race.

'Tirreno-Adriatico is nicknamed “The Race Between the Two Seas.” Yes, Italy is of course a peninsula surrounded by one continuous body of water called the Mediterranean (literally “In the Middle of Lands”), and to the old Masters of Italy, the mighty Romans, it was called simply Mare Nostrum (literally “Our Sea”) for eventually they owned every land around it. But truly, truly, the Mediterranean is too big. For the Romans hunting enemy or pirate fleets, to say they were seen on the waters of the Mediterranean would mean nothing—more specific divisions must be bestowed on its regional parts.'

"From 1969 to 1975 before the wheels metaphorically fell off and the literal punch-in-the-gut took place, Eddy Merckx was so dominant, his winning percentage was probably better than most MLB Hall of Famers' batting-averages."

"We all have our favorite races on the calendar, …the Paris-Nice is one of mine. In fact, of all the weeklong stage races sprinkled throughout the calendar: this one is my absolute favorite. It sports one of the best nicknames in cycling “The Race to the Sun,” even if it does not always live up to such a name. And its general itinerary is always the same: perhaps it is tightly bound by its title, or perhaps it knows it has found a winning formula."

"Its key unique challenge is in the race name itself for “strade bianche” translates literally to “white roads.” Yes, the iconic White Roads made of that special white gravel, O! how unique are they. Surely, they are a challenge on the flat, and quite the ordeal when they pitch up to well over 15% gradient in certain places. And unlike the Cobbled Classics, there is no initial stretch of leg-softening early flat kilometers to ease the peloton into racing: here from the flag drop, the riders are positioning and preparing for the first sector of gravel. "

'Well, after two years in a row of nice sunny weather for Opening Weekend, we are all starting to realize a nasty and dirty secret-and-a-half. Omloop Het Nieuwsbald might be one of the most highly anticipated races on the calendar, but nasty and dirty weather is necessary for that one to be a real ferocious heavyweight belter of a race. And surely we are all starting to come around to the reality that though Omloop will always be the more anticipated of the two for it is the “Official Official” start of the road season…maybe Kuurne-Brussels-Kuurne is lowkey the better Classic? '

"And for the second year in a row in the last few hundreds of meters, Tadej Pogacar kicked to line to defeat Adam Yates again and make it apparent to me (and hopefully all) that the UAE Tour is officially one of THOSE races…that need a facelift. ... But what to do about the UAE Tour? I should not just complain and criticize without being somewhat constructive, but this is a tough one. Allow me to muse."

"What makes the greatest showmen the greatest showmen is that they write the script for every game, match, event, or race they take part in; this is how they transform themselves into larger than life characters who dazzle the fans in unforgettable ways. On this Opening Weekend in Belgium two of cycling's superstars dictated how the race would play out…and in a complete power move: neither even factored in winning into their calculations."

"We have had many races already in the Southern Hemisphere, Middle East, and the tolerable parts of the Mediterranean: riders have gotten their seasons started right, some Australians and South Americans and Spaniards have already dazzled the home crowds, and many have gotten back into the swing of racing. Now it is time for the Classics men to come out to play, because on this Opening of Weekends is when the Spring Classics—the first massive objectives of the season—begin."

"...the smaller French Tour des Alpes Martime et du Var which has really grown on me these past two editions. I watched it last year because nothing else was on. I watched this year because….I don't really know why. Perhaps fear of missing out. Perhaps to fill out this week's smorgasbord. Perhaps because GCN made it easily available. Perhaps it did not occur to me until now that it is bizarre to watch 15 races over the course of five days. Probably all of the above."

'Then on Sunday we came to a “classic” thorny issue of certain cycling races, a problem that is very particularly pronounced in Spain. Spanish organizers seem to have an obsession saying every race is a “classic.”'

"The early season in cycling is the preseason of the sport in almost every respect, except in one massive way: these races still count."

"The calendar is long and bloated, at points there seems no rhyme or reason to it. Overall it is difficult to string together a season-long narrative besides the fact that we know what the biggest objectives are and we can measure or debate who has racked up the greatest haul all placings and winnings."

"It was like the big final or championship game of the season, the most accurate comparison is to the 4x4 Relay of a Track Meet: everyone has been there for 6 hours, everyone is drained and slap-happy from their own events. But should the meet come down to the wire, there is ferocious pressure and excitement watching the sprinters go the distance, or even the middle-distance runners show their speed. So it is with no disrespect at all to the earlier phenomenal races when I say there was a certain hype, aura, tension, and buildup to the Men's Elite Cyclocross World Title."

"So coming into the finishing straight of the third lap, Lucinda Brand was visibly frustrated and gestured to Marianne Vos to come through and do a turn to at least make the race somewhat even. But Marianne Vos…….was taking a drink FROM HER WATERBOTTLE."

"Yes, this title is beyond cliché and perhaps almost lazy. But if you have watched men's cyclocross at all for the past 8 seasons, can you blame me at all for picking such a title? Are not the men's elite riders themselves thinking of this race in such terms?"

"777's Annemarie Worst, second at Worlds last year, has tested positive for Covid and is out. Ever consistent Denise Betsema is out with some non-Covid illness and will no longer be making the trip to the US. Many more minor riders are also out, but the race is already shaping up to be a duel between the only two riders to have taken prestigious wins in the last few months."

"But none of this deterred the Belgians from getting out to the usual ferocious start. In fact, the start was more ferocious than I am accustomed: for a strange reason. The dominant generation of Belgians I was watching was the generation above the one I grew up with......Thus, to watch the replay of these 2013 World Championships, I felt in every respect like a 2nd Grader watching the big-and-strong 8th Graders above me. This older generation of Belgians looked physically bigger, looked incredibly more talented and driven, looked like untouchable masters."

"The race immediately began with the duel Rucphen ended with last time: Lucinda Brand pushing the pace with Marianne Vos coolly following behind again with a gap to the rest of the chasers before half-a-lap into the race—it was Mighty Ace-esque. And what was also Mighty Ace-esque was when Brand and Vos strategically sat up on the final straightaway to metaphorically stare each other down."

'This day at Val di Sole, the collective cyclocross discipline threw down the gauntlet and told the Winter Olympics committee: “You can ignore us no longer. We challenge you to amend your winter sports definition from ‘all the sport's competitions MUST take place on snow or ice' to ‘the winter sport's competitions must BE ABLE to take place on snow or ice.' We have top physical athletes, we have an international following, and we can do this sport on any terrain, even on the snowy turf that is your desire.” '

'And now it is time for a bit of heart-to-heart honesty: there have been many years where week-in and week-out the women's cyclocross season has been much more thrilling than the men's. For whole seasons, Mathieu Van Der Poel the Mighty Ace would have his way with the races, and the few exciting ones were the exceptions that proved the rule. Well, this year was a reverse of this formula, it was the women's races that proved early “done-and-dusted-deals,” and the exciting ones were exceptions that proved the rule.'

"Since the Arkansas Worlds were announced YEARS ago, I had marked it on my calendar as the day I would see the Mighty Aces duel it out on the biggest stage and on American soil…and I would be in attendance."

"But on Boxing Day, per tradition a World Cup Cross commenced. Surprisingly, it was not the stalwart Huesden-Zolder Cross which took place on the 27th as part of the Superprestige series, and instead it was muddy Dendermonde that was held on the 26th. Who would be in the hunt for this Boxing Day victory? Tough to say, as this was the first day the “Three Kings of Cross,” as people were terming them, would square off."

"But despite Iserbyt's and Aerts' exploits in late November, all Cross fans had turned their gazes to early December. For that was when Wout Van Aert (Jumbo-Visma Wasps) and Tom Pidcock (Ineos Grenadiers) were set to make their season debuts. "

"The trade kits were traded-out for the national team colors, and as usual, the front rows resembled a dual meet between the Belgian Powder Blues and the Dutchmen in Orange and on home soil this day. But within 2 minutes of racing, to have called this race even a dual meet would have been generous. It was 8-or-so Belgians in Powder Blue swarming and then soon strung out on the front, with only one local in Orange among them, Lars Van Der Haar."

"As an American, and once again a Midwest local, it is the pair of Waterloo and Iowa City Crosses that properly kick off the season right for me…and the later the better for these races: for Midwest hot and steamy September Crosses seem inappropriate and lame to me."

"Thus is cycling, like all the best sports, a microcosm realm of pursuits greater than one's self. To train, to hone their race-craft, to develop the fortitude required to race a bike pushes a person out of their comfort zone where they develop and mature physically, mentally, spiritually. The preparation is difficult in itself and many are not rewarded for their efforts with prizes. But just the desire to compete, just the will to endure grueling training sessions and harrowingly hard race experiences is surely something special, surely gives a sense of higher purpose."

"Before discussing the heroes themselves, let us compare the adventures of these journeys. When one sees the route of the Grand Tours circling or sometimes zig-zagging around or across France, Italy, and Spain, does not the map of Odysseus' plotted route around the Mediterranean quickly come to mind? Are there not similarities between the winds that blow Odysseus off course constantly compared to the crosswinds that denotate and ravage a bicycle race?"

"Ah! But this is Homer. He would only be distracted by these objects' appearances for a few moments, then he would immediately start fathoming the well of compelling struggles these human-powered bicycle machines could provide. Understanding Man's need for competition—for few have understood it better—surely Homer could have predicted that Men would inevitably start racing on such machines around velodromes like they raced on chariots in the hippodromes of the Roman world."

"Thirty years ago, that is to say, when we learned that Hector had been slain by Achilles. Is such a comparison too solemn, too glorious? No. What use would the so-called ‘classical studies' be if the fragments that remained with us did not become an integral part of our humble existence?"

"Compared to teenage but now premiere Strade Bianche and even the Cult Classic Tro Bro Leon, for some reason the end-of-season Paris-Tours gravel has yet to stupendously take off. Potentially this year's edition was a good showing for the French interior's gravel, but it was actually the race's finale that stole the show. "

Irishman Dan Martin almost retired without saying a proper goodbye.