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We watch good movies and bad movies for this podcast, but so rarely do we watch a movie that's straight-up depressing! But also kind of funny? It's a strange film, I don't know what to tell you. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Rip to all those emotionally scarred children and the two rabbits who died for no reason. Pour some out. Oh, and, uh, happy Easter? Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.orgTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Heads up on this one: Tony accidentally recorded this on the wrong microphone, so his audio is a bit muffled. Still better than our early episodes, but not peak performance. Are you ready for the worst sequel movie we've ever seen? A movie where we legitimately wanted the main character to die? A movie that killed Allan-a-Dale!? You've got to listen to the end to get that last joke. This is called “foreshadowing.” Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Back to Bluth! Is that anything? It doesn't feel like anything, but I'm writing stream-of-consciousness today, so I'm not changing it. What IS the secret of NIMH? Why is there a terrifying necromancer-coded owl? Will little Timmy survive!? Find out. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Time to go down to the American South so we can experience Ye Olde England in all its glory! At least, that's how the animals tell it… Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.orgTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Finally, we watch a movie that asks the big question: how should a framed portrait of your arch nemesis be displayed in your home? Probably other questions were asked, something about Sherlock Holmes and the Disney renaissance and politicians being replaced by robots, but I think we can all agree that this is the important one. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Another year is coming to an end, and who better to celebrate it with than everyone's favorite unwanted houseguests? Just watch out for the icy patch. Our theme music is Ukulele for Christmas by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Andy is @royalty-valens.bsky.social Tony is @inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

The absolute gall of this movie to use Roman numerals. We've done something we swore we would never do, and finally watched the third Balto movie. But can it hold up to the highs and lows of a wolf quest? Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is @inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Happy Thanksgiving! Here's the rest of our Halloween episode. Look, we have to do something like this every year or the Krampus will get us. We really enjoyed talking about Haunted Halloween, but that doesn't stop a near complete emotional breakdown by the end of the episode. So, keep your ears out for that! Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is@inspiredbytrueevents.org Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I'll say it, listener: you don't have to beware. You are not, in fact, in for a scare. We talk about Goosebumps, and only one of us has read Goosebumps books! Is Jack Black engaging enough to draw Tony in when he has no context for what's going on, or is this movie just for the true fans? Meanwhile, Andy provided the footnotes on all the monsters, and we thank him for that. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is @theaterbatsTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I still think “Two Dogs Go to Hell” would have been a better title. I really like this one. We lose our minds a little bit, and the tangents are top tier, ranging from rhino songs to catholic holidays to finding out popular guide dog breeds. Oh, we also talk about a movie. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

You can tell that a movie is weird when the episode is almost two hours long. This movie has it all: weird fetishy stuff, dogs with guns, murder, denying Christ in your heart, a loveable orphan, just everything, really. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is @theaterbats Tony's short story is here! Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Yeah, that... that's a weirdly placed exclamation point. Do you know who else uses exclamation points? Tim Curry! (Perfect segue.) We get a lot of good stuff from this move: a small town that tries and fails to be sinister, Scooby and Shaggy being gluttons to a truly unpleasant degree, and the Hex Girls! One of them is one-sixteenth wiccan. This is an important plot point. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is @theaterbats Tony's short story is here! Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

We've never managed a Halloween episode, and we're not starting now! Join us on a terrifying island where the zombies are the least of your problems! Listen to Andy's Scooby-Doo impression! Gasp out loud at the monster reveal! Consider that there are more confederate soldiers than strictly necessary for this kind of film. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's Youtube Channel is Ethical Games Journalism Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I'm hating that title more and more as time goes on. Remember when we watched good movies? Well, this time we didn't. Patrick Warburton is trying his best, Hayden Panettiere was did okay, and Glenn Close is, I'll say it, asleep at the wheel. Don't forget to pledge to A Summer of Sci-Fi & Fantasy: Vol 3 Kickstarter! Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I'm sure we're all just ecstatic to be talking about the most hideous 3d animation ever conceived of again. At least this time, there's a good story behind it. Oh, wait, I'm reviewing the footage, and I can't even say that in jest. Welp, here's a movie. Don't forget to pledge to A Summer of Sci-Fi & Fantasy: Vol 3 Kickstarter! Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Remember when Disney decided they were going to put their 2d animation out to pasture, but decided to give it one last ride? Well, this is what they made. And it sure was... a moovie. This episode is not as punny as that description would suggest. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

This might be the least we've ever talked about a movie! I'm pretty sure we only named two characters! I'm also pretty sure Disney is a company full of cowards who won't let a group of bears play the jug in their terrible movie! that's right, I've got opinions! Strong opinions! Strong, weird opinions! I've been doing the descriptions more freeform lately, and I have exactly zero regrets. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Well, it's that time of year again. There's a lot of Christmas specials on this nondenominational podcast. And this is our second year in a row with Disney shorts! Spoiler: don't watch this movie. Our theme music is Ukulele for Christmas by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats on Bluesky. Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

This episode we watched The Land Before Time II - The Great Valley Adventure and The Land Before Time V: The Mysterious Island. One of them held up! You will immediately know which one. In any case, Chomper is the best. No notes on his performance. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

We're back! And we're ready and raring to talk about a real boring movie where basically nothing happens for a while and then it's over. he end. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbatsTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Time to talk about everyone's favorite “character who is technically a Disney princess now, but only in the same way that Jack Kirby is a Disney legend:” Anastasia! (Technically this description also applies to Princess Leia and probably a character in Avatar.) We do talk a bit about how Disney owns everything now, and how it's legitimately unsettling. We're pretty split about this movie, but it's probably one of Don Bluth's best films. Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbatsTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Wow, it almost sounds like Tony forgot to adjust his levels before recording. Hmm… This episode, we reviewed the one Disney sequel only available on vhs: Hercules: Zero to Hero! Was it a fun romp through a Saturday morning cartoon version of Greek myth, or was it a bunch of cobbled together mythology references with barely any plot to keep them moving? Only one way to find out! Our theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Youtube channel is Direct to Video Podcast Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

New music, new… season? Anyway, I'm trying a new format in the descriptions. I was bored, sue me. We talk about Disney's Hercules! It's definitely a mess, but is is a charming mess or an infuriating one? We… boy we argue on that point. The good news is, we also manage to talk about important stuff, like Kingdom Hearts, terrible 90s CGI, GOOD 90s CGI, and that moment in Shrek when he and Donkey fight. Our (new!) theme music is Homeward by Scott Buckley. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbatsTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

The least sexy episode 69 ever. Important questions: What was that twenty minute fake out about? Where is the Wikimedia Zone? Was this whole series Andy's fault? Keep an ear out for Andy and Tony pledging to never watch another of Richard Rich's trash movies again. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbatsTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Oh, no! We watched a terrible romcom and accidentally released it as a Valentine's Day episode! Important questions: Did the animation get worse? How many movies is this movie? When will law enforcement figure out this tax scam? Keep an ear out for the sound of two people who are well and truly warn down by a terrible series. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbatsTony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Just in case you didn't get enough of us this year. Important questions: Why are Hewey, Dewey, and Louie so terrible? Are Max and Goofy Codependent? Did Andy... cut out tangents?? Keep an ear out for Tony armchair diagnosing Goofy and Andy condemning us to revisiting a classic series. Our theme music is The instrumental version of A Ukulele for Christmas. Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I cannot believe how palatable the gargoyles are in this movie. Important questions: Why put gems inside a bell? Why is Madeline such a nothing character? Is Quasimodo an incel? Keep an ear out for Tony having nostalgia for something stupid and Andy busts out his Nic Cage impression. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I, for one, love murder, lust, and genocide as key parts of my G-rated kids movies. Important questions: What makes a monster and what makes a man? Who is the protagonist of this movie? Is Quasimodo too ugly to love? Keep an ear out for Andy taking issue with a quite good song and Tony taking issue with the existence of the gargoyles. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

This one might have taken like two months to edit because of real life being actively terrible, but we're back! Important questions: Why wasn't this movie fun? Why is Boots the bet character/robot/broken plot device? Mistakes: bad? Keep an ear out for Andy acting like he's not a nerd right before he admits to seeing Star Trek by himself on Valentine's Day. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

A story about a space cop fighting his dad. Important questions: Who will betray Buzz in the final act!? Who is the most nineties character in this movie? Why are the little green men charming? Keep an ear out for Andy and Tony talking about Star Wars again, but this time it's thematic! Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

There are a nonzero amount of dogs barking on this recording, am I'm choosing to call that “thematic.” Important questions: Is Harry a cop? Does Pikachu hate cops? How much Star Wars talk did I have to cut? Keep an ear out for Andy and Tony each getting obsessive about different twists. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

Back to the nineties. Back to the heyday of one of the most popular franchises ever. Back... to the future. (Because there's maybe time travel.) Important questions: What's Mewtwo's motivation? Why does Christian soft rock start playing? Who is the Voyager? Keep an ear out for Tony criticizing voice actor performances, and Andy getting deep into the politics of anime dubbing, Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

I hope you had “trivialized a mental disorder” on your bad movie bingo cards, because we sure didn't! Important questions: What's with all the ghost stuff? Did the music get... better? When did Number Nine get cool again? Keep an ear out for the CRAZY TWIST that you can turn letters sideways. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

New year, same old terrible series. I deeply regret returning to this poisoned well. Important questions: Does anyone watch these movies? Why is Spider-Man acting so stupid? What is the worst plan in this film? Keep an ear out for the triumphant(?) return of Number Nine. Our theme music is Planet E by Lee Rosevere Find us on the Internet! Email is mail@directto.video Andy is @royalty_valens Andy's other podcast is Time Honored Pictures Tony is @theaterbats Tony's comic is Inspired By True Events

All right, one last time before the end of the year, let's finish a series. Important questions: Could they have more blatantly gotten Robin Williams back? How racist are the forty thieves? In what myriad of ways does Cassim suck? Keep an ear out for Andy referring to Cassim as a “daddy” and Tony refusing to acknowledge it. Thanks to Lee Rosevere for

At last: Tinkerbell dies.

Back from hiatus and better than—oh, no we’re still in Neverland! Important questions: What does pixie dust do? Is science evil? Does Zarina wanna make out with Captain Hook? Keep an ear out for the potential genocide of the winter fairies. Our theme music is

Those winter fairies can GET IT.

Fairies killed science.

Nothing says “we created a wondrous magical country” like “let’s immediately leave.” Important questions: Why is Mole the hero of this movie? Is Kida the villain of this movie!? Is Sweet even in this movie!?!? Keep an ear out for World War I, just around the corner. Our theme music is

Andy thought this would be a fun movie.

Merry Christmas! Here's another Halloween episode.

Our Halloween Episode! Happy Thanksgiving.

All right, I’ll just say it: I’m not proud of how long it took to edit this. Important questions: What’s the importance of a black superhero? What does this movie take from other movies, and does it improve those themes? Is everyone okay this year? Keep an ear out for Andy and Tony believing that […]

I am just so tired.

I’d like to apologize for being almost comically unable to do actual work for the better part of a month, but here’s the episode — Tony Important questions: Is Phil Collins a good performer? What is the theme of this movie? Who’s Clayton? Keep an ear out for questions of racism and feminism that are […]

In which a feather duster thinks a candlestick is having sex with a human.

In which King Triton is a dick.

It is no longer hotta' under de water.

Look at this stuff! Isn't it neat?