Just Winging It: Dads Podcast

What does a healthy work-life balance look like nowadays? With school out, and kids likely home more often with less structured time, the transition between work and home life can feel a lot more jarring. John and Patrick check in about how they weave together work and home life without the physical boundaries of commuting into their workplace.

As summer approaches and life has opened up again, the number of schedulable kids activities has shot back up. So how do we navigate which and how many activities to sign them up for now? Patrick and John chat about how to avoid overscheduling their kids lives and why it's worth giving more thought to how we structure their time in the first place.

Yeah... we're tired of talking about COVID, too. But here it is. Despite the fact that we've pretty much all settled on it being a part of our normal life now, the balancing act of school, daycare, work, and keeping some sanity with COVID in the house is still a big deal. John shares with Patrick the experience of catching COVID from his son and managing it in the household.

It seems we're all entering a new chapter, where COVID has become integrated into society, and no longer overshadowing it. So looking back at the last two years, how have we grown as young(ish!) parents? Patrick and John consider what they have lost and what they have found during this stretch, particularly when it comes to their ever-evolving identities.

The role that anger plays in parenting is very real. And it's often laced with guilt when we know we're supposed to model calmness for our kids. John and Patrick delve into how anger crops up for them and how they might have a healthier outlook on the emotion that deserves space and acceptance just like any other.

So much of parenting focuses on raising future adults. And so much of our own energy is focused on producing a more desirable future rather than fully experiencing this moment. It's no wonder then, that time flies by. Patrick and John pickup where they left off, digging further into "Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals," by Oliver Burkeman to see if they can learn a thing or two about how to slow down, do less, and accept that this is it.

Much of our adult lives are focused on how best to manage time. But what if it's our perspective on time that's the real issue? Patrick and John begin a multi-episode discussion on the notion that we've got it all wrong when it comes to managing our brief time on earth, as put forward by author Oliver Burkeman in his book, "Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals."

January 2022 marked another turn in this rollercoaster pandemic, disorienting families across the US as school returned from the holiday break. Now in February, John and Patrick return for their fifth season to take stock of the whirlwind start to the new year with childcare and school up in the air and COVID entering the home. Welcome back!

The second year of the pandemic—and fourth season of Just Winging It—is coming to a close. As always, there's a lot to reflect back on. Patrick and John unpack the various themes that emerged throughout the season and in their lives; from staying fit, mental health, cultivating independent thinking kids, and the various ways our lives have adapted to meet the moment.

Most kids won't grow up to be professional musicians, but shouldn't every child get the chance to explore their ability to make music? As a follow-up to their last episode on teaching music, John and Patrick welcome elementary school music teacher, Adam Shumate, to the show to share his journey into making and then teaching music. The dads dig deeper into how they might play some part in shaping their own kids' musical journey.

When and how does a parent go about teaching kids how to make music? How can you tell whether your child has a knack for it? Patrick and John discuss their very different backgrounds when it comes to making music and how that has informed their approach with their kids, including how they treat music around the house and the start of formal music lessons.

A new school year often comes with making and breaking routines, from morning to nighttime and everything in-between. John and Patrick catch up on life during the first few weeks of the new school year; the start of sick days, disrupted sleep habits, getting out of the house in the morning, and the list goes on.

How are you feeling? How honestly can you answer that question? All parents have been in the position of helping their kids manage emotions, but maybe we've still got some emotional intelligence to develop ourselves. Patrick and John talk about research by Dr. Marc Brackett from Yale's Center for Emotional Intelligence. Dr. Brackett advocates for a less judgmental and more inquisitive approach to probing into our feelings and learning to regulate them. Sure sounds like a useful parenting skill.

We're once again entering the new school year. And to some extent, it seems we've come to terms with the reality of managing COVID through it. John and Patrick orient themselves to the school year with some summer debriefing and looking ahead to the next year of their kids' development.

Planning a vacation was tough enough in the before times. Now the choices we make about where to stay, how to get there, and what kinds of activities to do are infused with the uncertainty of the pandemic. Patrick and John chat about their recent family vacations, how they managed the logistics, how great it felt to get away again, and how to plan the next one.

It's summer, when fun and emotions run high. What are the right outlets to focus all that free time into? John and Patrick bring on Jake Robertson, father-of-two—including a newborn—to chat about summer, handling emotional outbursts, and whales.

What does a healthy relationship with fear look like? How do we equip ourselves and our kids to work through fear and anxiety? After the extended simmering anxiety through the pandemic, John and Patrick dig into how they might look at fear differently and some strategies for helping kids do the same.

Remember what it was like to be an adult without kids around? It's easy to forget after a year and a half of relative social isolation. As a parent of young kids, time to be an adult with other adults was already rare. Patrick and John bring Jeff Deutsch back onto the show to reflect on his transition from the carefree pre-kid years with his wife, to the shock of a newborn, to the emerging stability as a family unit. The dads examine how their identities as adults has transformed in the process.

The pandemic continues to abate in the US, now to the point where some degree of normalcy is sliding back in. What will the transition look like? John and Patrick process the momentous re-entry stage they are now in as they are able to operate in the world again without masks and with a lot more people and plans, all the while still navigating life with kids who can't yet get vaccinated.

Leaving the hospital with a new baby is already a surreal experience. Taking those steps out into a world where a pandemic was just declared brings a new level of intensity. Patrick and John bring Ash Kosiewicz onto the show to share his experience over the last year as he and his wife brought their daughter into this new pandemic world. The dads reflect on the future of parental leave and childcare in a post-pandemic world.

Reading great parenting advice is one thing; using that advice isn't as easy. After exploring some ancient parenting techniques shared in "Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans" by Michaleen Doucleff in the last episode, Patrick and John chat about ways they've attempted to challenge themselves and adapt their style to test new (old) parenting practices.

What if much of what we take for granted as parenting in the US is... wrong? John and Patrick take a step back to consider how we even arrived at the modern day parenting playbook, and they dive further into the recent book, "Hunt Gather Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans" by Michaleen Doucleff to see what we have to learn from cultures that have kept up with ancient parenting techniques.

Some of our most basic parenting instincts focus on keeping children safe from danger. At the same time, in order to support our kids as they learn new skills we're often faced with the balancing act of introducing physical and mental risks. Patrick and John bring back Peter from the Midwest to explore the calculated risks involved in raising well-rounded kids who can grow with confidence and deal with danger; whether learning how to ride a bike or skateboard or develop street smarts to navigate the world.

Why does so much of parenting feel like a battle of wills? Getting kids to contribute around the house—or even clean up their own mess—is a struggle amplified to greater volumes now that we've been stuck home for so much of the last year. Thankfully, John and Patrick can tap a better resource then their own brains for this one. The new book, " Hunt Gather Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans" by Michaleen Doucleff could not have come at a better time. The dads dig into a few recent articles on the book to work through some new approaches they will undoubtedly report back on in future episodes.

Alright, so there's staying healthy and then there's trying to look good as the years start adding up. But what does looking good even mean anyway? Patrick and John bring on occupational therapist Joe Rich to share some tips and dig into what the heck we're all even trying to look like in the first place.

Pet adoptions are skyrocketing during our pandemic lives. In households already occupied with raising little beings, the choice to add animals into the mix gets complicated. So what goes into making the decision to bring a pet into our families now?John and Patrick reflect on their recent pet adoptions and add a bit of commentary on pet culture and animal ethics.

How are those new year exercise goals going? Just Winging It is back to lift you up! Or... maybe just to make you feel better about yourself?Patrick and John kick off season four with physical therapist Denis Long to talk about how to setup and stick with a good exercise routine while dadding in 2021.

What. A. Damn. Year. We're still adapting daily with the uncertainty of it all while also falling into all- too-familiar of a routine with life during the pandemic. What comes next?Patrick and John close out 2020 and season three of Just Winging It considering how and where to find joy during these tough times, reflecting back all the way to episode 22 when they discussed The Book Of Joy by Archbishop Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama.

The transition to the cold, dark months brings on some tough emotions even in a normal year. In this intense 2020, the impending winter feels particularly intense.John and Patrick sort through the latest parenting challenges brought on by the pandemic, how they're feeling about the upcoming season, and the concept of adult pandemic tantrums. Yeah, it's a thing.

The stakes for the 2020 US presidential election could not feel any higher. The results show a country torn in half. Where do we go from here?Just a couple days after the election was called for Biden, Patrick and John process the emotional rollercoaster and grapple with what comes next for our country and for the way we parent through the sharp political divide that persists between us.

Pandemic life has transformed our work and home lives for the indefinite future. With school back in session for several weeks now, a new rhythm is emerging. John and Patrick talk specifically about their work from home setup; while their wives are out working, the two dads balance working from home with getting kids through hybrid school schedules and abrupt quarantines.

One of the silver linings through this pandemic is the increased time we're all spending outdoors in nature. Isn't that where our children are supposed to spend their days anyway?The famed Pete From the Midwest comes on to probe into the subject with Patrick and John, exploring how meaningful nature has been for them growing up and now—and how they've managed to promote the outdoors with their kids.

Just like that, we've been just winging it for 100 episodes. In case you missed it, a lot has happened over the last 2.5 years since the show began. But we're not here to talk about world events right now.John and Patrick reflect back with listeners on the last 99 episodes; some of the funniest JWI moments, their favorite topics, and as a reminder of why the heck they're doing this in the first place.

Can you feel the anticipation? Just Winging It will celebrate 100 episodes soon! Send in your favorite Just Winging It moment--a time when you cry-laughed, had an aha moment, or simply smiled and nodded. Record your moment and email it to justwingingitdads@gmail.com so we can air it on our 100th episode and reflect back on our sheer brilliance.

Labor Day has passed, school is officially starting; so marks the transition from summer to what feels like a new year, and a new phase of life in a pandemic.Patrick and John go deeper to explore the rewiring of our brains and our lives as we settle into our adapted lifestyles this school year.

As the summer winds down, the reality ahead for families is sinking in. We're about to emerge from our relatively sheltered Spring and Summer to hunker down for school, work, and all that the Fall and Winter will bring. And maybe transform into something entirely new. John and Patrick unpack the emotional toll of the pandemic during this transitional time of year.

The Fall is approaching quickly and the reality of beginning a new school year amidst the pandemic is settling in.Patrick and John work through what's on every school age parent's mind right now; how the heck is school going to work this year?

Two years ago (episode 19), planning kids birthday parties was stressful enough. Somehow now with the pandemic backdrop, it has become both simpler and more complicated. John talks Patrick through his daughter's week of birthday parties and their strategy to manage expectations with their kids, while still celebrating their big day with friends and family.

The pace and scale of change around us is without precedent in our lifetime. So it's no surprise that change is manifesting in all sorts of ways, big and small, in our families. John and Patrick chat about some of the latest changes in their households, including a transition back to daycare, a new dog, and the beginning of a new career.

Getting outside with our families has been more important than ever. So why not take the time to teach our kids—and ourselves—some new outdoor activities? Patrick and John share their latest outdoor discoveries as they keep on working through how to take advantage of all this extra time with the kids.

From the moment you move into a new home, the projects begin and never stop. With all this extra time at home now during the pandemic, it seems the projects have multiplied. John and Patrick celebrate Father's Day with a chat about their home improvement ups and downs. Let's be honest, mostly downs. Happy Father's Day!

A spark has ignited across the country as we slowly climb out of the pandemic while facing head on a crisis that continues to plague the US: the oppression of black people.Patrick and John work through how to show up meaningfully and helpfully in this moment as two white men. Most important, they want to listen and amplify black voices. Founder and co-host of the Perfect Organism podcast, Jaime Prater, joins to share some of his experience growing up holding dual identities, black and white, and to reflect with John and Patrick on the significance of this moment in the fight for racial justice.

Spring is peaking, the pandemic curve is sloping down, and we're all gradually emerging to figure out our new reality.That new reality for Patrick and his family includes a new house in new state. He and John chat about the big move, what it has been like to transition homes at this particular moment, and how we're all feeling some sense of new beginnings.

We meant it when we said it's important to check in with each other during this time of insanity. John and Patrick bring on a group of listeners for a Zoom roundtable on how we're all managing life during a pandemic.

The school-year is officially canceled. Daycare is closed for a couple more months. What has felt temporary, is now settling into something more. Patrick and John dig into what it's going to take to prepare for this longer-than-expected episode of life.

As we settle into week five of staying home and trying to balance managing a family and work, we're having to relearn how to keep up with parenting. John and Patrick catch up on the latest life events and how they're getting stuff done, continuing to adapt, and maybe making some discoveries along the way.

More than ever, it's important that we find time to check in with ourselves and with our friends and family.As the COVID-19 crisis peaks in the US, Patrick and John catch up on their weeks—the continued stress of parenting through a pandemic. Because honestly, what the heck else is there to talk about?

This is life now. It's socially distant. It's virtual school and work. It's 24/7 parenting. And as much as it's all feeling like Groundhog Day, each week has it's own flavor.This week, John and Patrick describe what it has been like to attempt the things we had been doing before the pandemic. In the face of these challenges, the two dads try to figure out how they can do better.

Our society's response to COVID-19 has triggered rapid changes in how we live—with such frequency that we're left trying to adapt daily as best we can. Patrick and John talk through how they're managing to settle into some kind of new rhythm with their families and what they're learning so far amidst this crisis.

Alright folks, now we are just winging it at a whole new level. Families everywhere are coping with the day-to-day uncertainty brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic. And this is only the beginning.John and Patrick take some time together to process the last couple of weeks—the closing of schools, the quarantining, the working from home with kids, and all the rest of it. As usual, we don't have any answers here. We're just learning how to be okay with that.

Socializing becomes a whole lot different after having kids; when it happens at all, it often involves a half-engagement with other people and half-focus on watching or thinking about our kids. We know friendships are generally a good thing to pursue, but who has the time to put into them anymore?Patrick and John welcome guest Finn McSweeney to chat about what it has been like for he and John to connect via their kids. The three dads explore why the pursuit of friendship with other dads is a worthy one.