Taxes and Tater Tots

Workin' 9 to 5, what a way to make a podcast! Well, not really, but everyone has to start somewhere and in this episode we discuss some of our first jobs—the good, the bad, and the sometimes just downright unbelievable. By the end, things go a bit off the rails and we make jokes about Paul Rudd for about 15 minutes. So, you know, a standard work day. Highlights Include: Impromptu 'Mambo #5', Matt's Daughter is the Grinch of Pony Christmas, Floor Food is Good Food, King Midas' Golden Showers, Toys 'R Us Horror Stories, Court-Ordered Jobs, Way to Go Hawkman and much more!

We're not exactly sure what "going bump" is, but monsters seem to do it. Why do they only do it in the night? Who knows! But the only thing scarier than monsters is missing out on our new Halloween episode! Highlights Include: Cory's big announcement, wolffriends, is Matt's very tall brother a monster?, monster love, probing, we design the monster of the future and much more!

We're back with a fall episode all about Back to School, and it's got everything you need for the school year (number #2 pencils, a 3 ring binder, college-ruled notebooks sold separately). Highlights Include: Potty Conditioning, Jeremy the Homeless Lion, the Pencil Top Eraser Debate, the Moral Compass, Don't Worry About the First Month and much much more!

Keep your arms and legs inside the episode, becasue today we're continuing our Summer Fun mini-series by talking about amusement parks.   Highlights Include: Mr. Toppum Hat Causes Subway Delays, Buttpads, Jeremy in the Hall of Mirrors, Kiddy Coasters, Rides vs. Ambiance, Do It For Photo, Tinder for Rides, The Inevitable Discussion of Objectum Sexuality and much much more!

It's summer and that means people are going to want to go to the beach. Why? Who knows. It's a sandy mess, but in this episode we share what used to make the beach special, how we deal with it now, and share ideas to make the beach fun again. Highlights Include: Cory's Recycling; Jeremy Gets a Blade at His Throat; Wearing Your Child for Popularity; Life's a Beach; 1950's Bullies; Digging Holes, Mandalas and Other Dumb Arts; Seamonsters and Seasharks and much more!

Collect call from hilarious banter, will you accept the charges? In this episode we're talking about telephones. from our rotary horror stories to the apps we've decided the future demands.  Highlights Include: Filling the Iron Man Hole, the Circle Nightmare Machine, Inverse Child Tracking, Texting & Driving Is Cool, John Krasinski Lies About Blackberry, Depthphone and much more!  

Grab the soda, the scary movies and the bowl of warm water for after we fall asleep because we're talking about sleepovers and slumber parties! From the sleepovers of uncomfortable children to the overnight sessions of gross teens to the drunken markerfests of uncomfortable, gross college students we touch on all the sleep-based festivities there are. We're also pleased to announce that from now on we're letting YOU vote on the musical style Matt sings the This Week In Adulthood theme in. Reach out to us on Facebook or Twitter and vote for what you want to hear! Highlights Include: Jeremy Jumps at Thunder, Play Place Grease Applicators, Matt Cycles Through Cousins, Cory: Sleepover Fight Broker, Matt "Crackerhands" Adams, MST3K is a Sleepover Classic, The Queen of Walking, Marker Artistry, Hanglider Sleepovers and much much more!

Shake up your phone and spray this new episode into your earholes because we're talking about soda. It's sweet, it's sticky, and being the disgusting manchildren we are it's our only source of hydration. Joining is this week is Joel Torres of the podcast Please Don't Send Me into Outer Space.  Highlights Include: A Mouthful of Hockey Crunch, Cave Man Soda, Root Beer is Sinful and Tastes Different After You Kill a Man, the Problem With Fruit Flavors, Suicide (the Drink, Not the Action), Soda for Cats, Japan: Innovating the Weirdest Things, A Mouthful of Ants and much more!

Shh! Quiet down or you'll attract the Podcast Goblin! You've heard of the Podcast Goblin, right? No? Well it makes about as much sense as the other stuff we've been afraid of. In this episode, we discuss all the crazy things we were irrationally afraid of as children, what we're still shamefully afraid of, and we explore the brave new world of silly things to be afraid of in the future. Highlights Include: Sweet Sashes, Backyard Land Sharks, Why Did Everyone Assume Kids Wanted to See The Crypt Keeper?, Escalators: Nature's Killing Machines, Muppet Baby Nightmare Nanny, Chokeshack, Matt Joins the KKK and much more! Show Notes:

Get ready to tickle the ivories, release your spit valves, and do all the other gross-sounding things that are apparently related to instruments because we are talking about making music.  Highlights Include: Matt: Heartless Dog Murderer, Getting Serious About Medieval Times, We Bleep All of Matt's Foul Scat, Make Choir Great Again, An Important PSA About Not Playing Your Acoustic Guitar at Parties, Mambo #5 To-Do List and much more!

Ready your sackful of quarters (no, not for hurling at us) because we're going to the local arcade. The arcades of childhood, the games we love/hate, the best butt spanking games out of Japan and more can be yours for only 30,000 tickets!   Highlights Include: Erotic Poetry Jam, OK Potato, World Famous Arcade Cuisine, Practical Uses of Skeeball, The Last Buttwhisperer and much more!

The weather outside is frightful, so we made this episode extra delightful. Curl up by a roaring fire and listen to this hearty minisode as you slowly succomb to carbon monoxide poisoning (you forgot to open the flue, you fool!) Highlights Include: Losing Your Right to Be Irresponsible in a Game of Pool, What Happens to Bugs In Winter?, Sledding: For Suckers, Bad Porridge Business, The American Hero Who Invented Snow Angels and much more!

Oh hi, we didn't see you there. We were just getting ready to have some special guests over for the Holidays. Also, Santa's gone missing? In this episode, we talk about all the great, awful, and awfully great Christmas specials we've seen. Highlights Include: Do Cats Know It's Christmas?, Jeremy's Pajama Jam, Down Home Musical Christmas Specials, Is John Denver Jesus?, Speed Buggy: Nature's Perfect Santa, We Create the World's Greatest Christmas Special and much much more!

Running C:newepisode.bat. Systems online. We're back with a brand new episode all about ROBOTS. We are joined by a special guest, comedian and comedy robot programmer Glen Tickle, to discuss the finer points of parenting both children and robots, the dumb robots from our childhoods and what parts of us we want chopped off and replaced with shiny robo-bits. You can check out Glen's new album Yes, Please on Bandcamp. Highlights Include: We're All the Worst at Raking Leaves, Jeremy Has a Board Game and No Friends, Robots: The Most Oppressed Group in Cinema History?, A Long Discussion of Zordon from The Power Rangers, A Quiz on Bad Robot Names, Cory Tries to Defend the Robot Maid From Rocky IV and much more!

♫ Lullabye and goodnight / here's a new epi-sode / close your eyes, drift to sleep / 'less you listen and drive ♫ This episode is all about sleep, and it gets...kinda creepy. Man-sized doll creepy. Highlights Include: Jeremy Needs to Dream Bigger, Big Manly Hands, Sleeping With a Chucky Doll, Girlfriend Hibernation, The Critic and much more!

This week's episode comes complete with real kung-fu grip! Podcast and Something Awful favorite Asterios Kokkinos dropped by to discuss action figures and wound up discussing just about everything you could imagine in our most wonderfully tangent-filled episode yet! Make sure you check out his new book, Toys "4" Cheap: The Magic of Toys Will Shut Up Your Child on Amazon. Highlights Include: Steamed Hams, Destroying Action Figures, The Second Coming of the Barber Messiah, Teenage Mutant Ninja Farmers, The X-Men/Ghostbusters Team Up You've Always Dreamed Of,  An Incredibly In-Depth Look into the Terminator-Winslowverse, Solving the Homeless Problem with Teddy Ruxpin and much (much!) more.

While we never did manage to get Matt back from the kidnappers who kept him from recording, we did record a minisode in which we talk birthday presents, Billy Beer, and we fix circuses once and for all. Highlights Include: The Burden of Having Nice Things, Billy Beer Tours, Queen of the Beer Circus, Hologram Patrick Duffy Bloodsports and more!

We've got all the important contact numbers on the fridge, we've left money for you to order a pizza, and we've invited Shannon Campe of the Stage of Fools podcast to keep an eye on you while we have one night to ourselves. Don't be difficult, we deserve to be able to go out like people every once in a while! Highlights Include: Matt's murder garage, Cory invents baby battling, the different between babysitting and nannying, a quiz on the CRAZIEST Babysitter Club book plots and much more!

Get your bowl of sugary cereal and turn your brain off because we're talking about Saturday Morning Cartoons: the good, the bad, and the bizarre. We also have a very special announcement: Taxes and Tater Tots has joined the Ear Trump Audio podcast network! Highlights Include: [Ear] Trump[et], Crank Driving, How to Tell Hemsworths Apart, Ecto-Cooler, Jeremy's Secret Histeria! Stash, We Play 'Which Of These Was a Real Cartoon?" and much more!

Do not pass 'go', do not collect $200 until you listen to this new episode with special guest, Stephanie Stone-Robb from the podcasts The Songs That Saved Your Life and Lifemark. Highlights Include: Rubber Duck Skills, Matt's Gettin' a House, an Incredibly Philosophical Look at Party Games, What Makes a Good Drinking Board Game, Kickstarter and more!

Once upon a time in a far off kingdom, there was a comedy podcast about growing up that had a special guest, Erin Gambrill from the podcast Ladies Who Library Highlights Include: Stupid Baby Tricks, Cory and Jenn Abduct Children for Hollywood, First Reads, What Makes a Good Kid's Book, How to Raise a Geek, and much more!

Sit. Stay. Staaaaaaay. Good audience! Who's a good audience?! Yes you are! Yes you are! We're talking about pets, and this episode's it's own treat.   Highlights Include: Weird Al love, baby raves, are babies pets?, Matt can't train dogs but is allowed to have a child, the sheddiest dogs we've ever seen, teacup pigs and more!

Just when you thought it was Game Over, we're back a new episode! We're joined by Ethan Warren, the writer/director behind the new film West of Her, to discuss video games (but he had to use the bad controller). Highlights Include: The Walking Kinda Sick, School Bus Parents, Mario Kart Studies, Matt's Macabre Second Life Adventures, and much much more!

Turn your head and cough, because we're back with a new episodeall about staying healthy. Highlights Include: Matt's Is the EasterBunny, Get That Stink, Cory's Glass Wrists, Eating a Bullet,and much much more!

Lesson #1: There's a new episode of Taxes and Tater Tots! That's the only lesson, class dismissed! Highlights Include: Matt's Convict Poster, How Does College Work?, Favorite Teachers, Giving Up on Math and much more

It's all jockstraps and face paint on today's episode, as we're joined by Vince Greene from the podcast Vince and Nina... to discuss all things sports.  Highlights Include: Matt's on Vicodin, Jeremy Vomits Pure Black, Is Sweating While You Eat a Sport?, The Only Difference Between a Pig and a NASCAR Driver Is a Jacket, Sex Bots, Mike Tyson's Chess Boxing and more

Straight from the catwalks of Milan, it's a new episode of Taxes and Tater Tots! Note: sorry about my audio quality. New mic is on the way! - Jeremy Highlights Include: Paul Giamatti's Rocky, We Uncover the Next Picasso, Nature's Greatest Creation: The Cargo Pant, Circumcision, Fashion of the Future and more!

It's a Christmas miracle: a new episode of Taxes and Tater Tots! Highlights Include: Holiday party drinking, Jeremy vs. Jesus, Matt Meets the Bible Lady, The Tradition of Chinese Food, Best Holiday Specials and more  

 To-Do List: Do the dishes, take out the trash, listen to this episode. We're talkin' chores, because talking is easier than doing.  Highlights Include: The Gourmet's Guide to Chicken Nuggets, Cory and Matt Farm for Rocks, Beefing With the Burn Barrel, Jeremy's Disgusting Flatware, Free-Range Laundry

Ah, the silver screen. Nothing says "childhood" like watching the same VHS tapes over and over again. This week, we take a look at the films of our youth, explore how our tastes have changed and write the perfect kid's movie. Highlights Include: Peanut butter bondage, a passionate defense of Spy Kids, Jeremy's ridiculous fear and more. 

Over the lips, past the gums, watch out stomach, it's a new episode of Taxes and Tater Tots! This week we're chatting about chow, from favorites to cooking and everything in between. Highlights Include: A Long Rant about Pokemon, Ketchup on Everything, Fishloaf, Matt's Sticky Garbage Collection, Warhead Omlettes, Matt's Daughter Gives His Restaurant a Bad Review

We're down one host this week, so here's a minisode Matt and Jeremy recorded to badmouth why Cory couldn't make it. Highlights Include: Baby 2.0, The Twentysomething Cookbook, Eventual Bear Uprisings, Follow the Rich, A Secret About M. Night Shyamalan.

Just in time for Labor Day, we take a look at how to take at how to rekindle the joys of childhood vacations without having to cry on the airplane. Highlights Include: Kids Faking Illnesses, Free Toilets on Ryanair, Our Sick Obsession with Disney World, Dead Prostitute Pizza, and Replacing Jeremy with Jonah Hill.

In this episode we discuss getting your own place. Highlights Include: Jeremy's made-up Cirque du Soleil landlords, 9/11 insurance, why it sucks to own a house, Matt's dumb idea that totally didn't make Jeremy cry.

Are those wedding bells? Nope, that's just our premiere episode.  Highlights Include: Inappropriate Spaceballs, Julia Roberts, "Come With Power".