Mental Wellness Cindy

In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we navigate the challenges and opportunities of parenting in today's fast-paced, tech-driven world. From managing screen time and balancing busy schedules to fostering meaningful connections amidst constant distractions, modern parenting requires adaptability and mindfulness.Explore strategies to raise resilient, emotionally intelligent children while navigating the unique pressures of modern life. We'll discuss topics like setting healthy boundaries with technology, encouraging open communication, and maintaining mental wellness for both parents and children.Whether you're juggling work and family or seeking to create a nurturing environment in a fast-changing world, this episode offers practical tips and insights to help you thrive as a parent. Tune in to learn how to build strong, loving relationships and guide your children toward a balanced and fulfilling life in the modern age.

In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we delve into the power of nature-based learning and its profound impact on mental health, emotional well-being, and personal growth. Discover how spending time in nature can enhance focus, reduce stress, and foster creativity in both children and adults.We'll explore practical ways to incorporate nature into learning experiences, whether through outdoor classrooms, gardening, or simple activities like nature walks. Learn how connecting with the natural world nurtures resilience, boosts mindfulness, and strengthens emotional connections.Whether you're an educator, parent, or someone seeking new ways to grow and thrive, this episode offers actionable tips and inspiring insights to help you embrace nature as a tool for learning and healing. Tune in and uncover how the great outdoors can transform the way we teach, learn, and live.

In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we explore the transformative power of social-emotional learning (SEL) and how it shapes emotional intelligence, resilience, and strong relationships. Whether you're a parent, educator, or someone looking to enhance your emotional well-being, this episode offers practical strategies and insights to help you incorporate SEL into your daily life.Discover how to build essential skills like empathy, self-awareness, and effective communication, and learn how these tools can help manage stress, improve mental health, and create meaningful connections. From real-life examples to expert tips, we'll guide you through actionable steps to foster emotional well-being at home, in the classroom, and beyond.Tune in to Mental Wellness Cindy and start your journey to stronger emotional intelligence and a more mindful, fulfilling life today!

Are you looking for ways to better understand and support your child's unique strengths? In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we dive into the Theory of Multiple Intelligences by Howard Gardner—a transformative approach that identifies eight distinct types of intelligence, from linguistic and logical-mathematical to musical, interpersonal, and more.Discover practical tips for recognizing your child's natural talents, fostering their confidence, and supporting their mental health and wellness. Whether your child excels in art, problem-solving, or connecting with others, this episode offers actionable strategies and real-life examples to help them thrive.Perfect for parents who want to celebrate their child's individuality, improve communication, and create a supportive environment at home. Tune in now to learn how to nurture your child's potential and set them up for long-term success.

In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we explore practical ways to help children navigate stress in their daily lives. From school pressures to social challenges, kids today face unique stressors that can impact their mental health and well-being. Learn how to recognize the signs of stress, create a supportive environment, and equip your child with tools to manage overwhelming emotions. Drawing on real-life examples and proven techniques, this episode empowers parents, caregivers, and educators to nurture resilience and emotional balance in children. Tune in to discover how small changes can make a big difference in helping kids thrive, even during tough times.

Explore the transformative path of gentle parenting. Whether you're a new parent, seasoned caregiver, or simply interested in building healthy, compassionate connections with children, this podcast offers practical insights, proven techniques, and real-life stories that make gentle parenting accessible and rewarding. Each episode dives into topics like nurturing empathy, fostering open communication, managing emotions, and setting respectful boundaries. Join us for heartfelt conversations that empower you to build a strong, trusting bond with your child and encourage emotional wellness in every stage of their development. Start your journey to mindful, peaceful parenting today!

Welcome to another enlightening episode of "Mental Wellness Cindy," where we delve into the concerning trait of narcissistic lack of empathy. Individuals with narcissistic tendencies often display a disturbing inability to empathize with others' emotions and experiences. In this impactful discussion, we unveil the nature of narcissistic empathy deficiency, its far-reaching consequences, and powerful strategies to safeguard ourselves from its emotional toll. Join us as we navigate the complex terrain of empathy absence and equip ourselves with the tools to foster healthier connections and prioritize our emotional well-being. Tune in to discover how to confront and mitigate the effects of narcissistic lack of empathy in our lives and relationships.

Welcome to a thought-provoking episode of "Mental Wellness Cindy," where we delve deep into the toxic trait of narcissistic entitlement. Narcissistic entitlement is a destructive behavior often exhibited by individuals with narcissistic tendencies, where they demand special treatment and believe they deserve more than others. In this enlightening discussion, we uncover the nature of narcissistic entitlement, its impact on our lives, and powerful strategies to shield ourselves from its harmful effects. Join us as we navigate the challenging landscape of entitlement and empower ourselves to establish healthy boundaries and reclaim our own worth. Tune in to discover how to counteract narcissistic entitlement and cultivate relationships built on mutual respect and authenticity.

In this gripping episode of "Mental Wellness Cindy," we delve into the explosive phenomenon of narcissistic rage. Narcissistic rage is a dangerous and volatile emotional outburst displayed by individuals with narcissistic traits when their fragile sense of self is threatened. In this compelling discussion, we uncover the nature of narcissistic rage, its devastating impact on relationships, and powerful strategies to protect ourselves from its destructive force. Join us as we navigate the turbulent waters of narcissistic rage and empower ourselves with the tools to respond with strength and resilience. Tune in to reclaim your power and transform the way you navigate challenging relationships.

In this compelling episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we expose the insidious tactic of narcissistic smear campaigns. A smear campaign is a destructive and manipulative behavior employed by narcissists to tarnish the reputation and credibility of their victims. In this eye-opening discussion, we delve into the nature of smear campaigns, their devastating impact on lives, and powerful strategies to protect ourselves from their harmful effects. Join me as we uncover the truth behind smear campaigns and empower ourselves to stand resilient against false narratives. Tune in to reclaim your voice and regain control over your own narrative

In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy, we delve into the deceptive tactic of narcissistic love bombing. Love bombing is a manipulative behavior often used by narcissists to overwhelm and control their victims with excessive affection, attention, and flattery. In this enlightening episode, we uncover the nature of love bombing, its impact on our lives, and powerful strategies to protect ourselves. Join us as we unravel the layers of love bombing and empower ourselves to recognize and break free from its toxic grip. Tune in to reclaim your power and create healthy, authentic relationships.

In this episode of Mental Wellness Cindy we delve into the manipulative tactic of narcissistic gaslighting. Discover the insidious ways narcissists distort reality, leaving us doubting our own sanity. We explore the psychological impact of gaslighting and empower you with strategies to protect yourself. Join us as we reclaim our truth and learn to navigate the twisted world of gaslighting with clarity and strength. Tune in to reclaim your power and break free from the chains of gaslighting. This episode is part of a 13 part series on Narcissistic Traits celebrating the launch of my new ebook Unraveling Narcissism: Understanding, Healing & Thriving Beyond Toxic Relationships -available on Amazon Kindle. This series and new ebook are inspired by my own experiences of being in a relationship with a narcissist. My aim is to help others in a similar situation to be able to identify the narcissistic traits and to empower them with the knowledge to seek the support they need and to have the the strength to become strong enough to survive and recover from these toxic relationships.

After an 18 month break I am finally back making new podcasts, I am absolutely thrilled to be able to share and learn through this journey with all of you. On this podcast we are discussing resilience.

Feeling good is a responsibility that we all have for ourselves. Learn not to mix up seasonal people and situations with lifetime expectations.

Love is worth it and anything is possible when it comes to love because the future is unwritten.

How to practice self love to help improve your life, health and wellbeing.

Narcissists devalue you to increase their own sense of self-worth. To explain this further, while a narcissists self esteem can be high, it can also be super fragile, dependent on external validation or self-deception. 1. You need to set your BOUNDARIES and stick to them no matter what the narcissist does. They hate having boundaries imposed, so be prepared for the pushback! If you need to block them from being able to contact you on all platforms including phone calls, texts, emails and social media go ahead. Setting boundaries should also include setting personal boundaries such as not sharing personal information. 2. Another important step in surviving the narcissists’ abuse is acknowledging the abuse be it past or present. If the narcissist is a romantic partner, family member, or friend it can be difficult to accept that some people just do not seem to care when they hurt others. Mental health issues do not excuse abuse. 3. Learn more about narcissistic behaviours because being able to identify the tactics often used by people with narcissism can both make it easier to come to terms with your own abuse as well as giving you strategies to reduce the negative impact their behaviours can have on you. 4. Take care of yourself and RECLAIM YOUR IDENTITY!!!! If you had changed your looks and style or lost things and friend or family because of the narcissist reclaim them. 5. Do not criticise yourself for the abuse because no one deserves abuse, and the narcissists abuse is not your fault! Instead REMEMBER to forgive yourself.

Always know when to walk away. Give a man enough rope and he will eventually hang himself.

Is there anything wrong with wanting something right now, or with wanting satisfaction right away?

You have two choices when the walls are falling in on you 1. Break down in despair and let the walls crush you or, 2. Rise up in hope and lift those falling walls away from you. Rising up in hope is not an easy process it takes time, energy and determination. Life is not easy it is hard, it is filled with darkness and sometimes it is hard to see that light at the end of the tunnel. But when you choose hope you choose to believe that even though you cannot see that light at the end of the tunnel it is there. Take the first step today towards that unseen light and it will change your life for the better. My challenge and everyone’s challenge with this is to practice being hopeful every day because with daily practice being hopeful becomes natural. We all have to practice being hopeful, we also have to practice becoming alert, becoming more conscious and becoming aware. We also have to practice becoming kinder more compassionate and more caring with ourselves. The more we practice the better we will become at being able to be more hopeful, even when it feels like the whole world is against us and nothing is working the way we wanted it to. So the next time you have a problem in your life, instead of fighting it, take the time to ask what is this problem here to teach me? Choose to see the problem as your friend, something that is here to help you grow.

I just wanted to share my thoughts and gratitude in the current Covid 19 situation and the bravery of my fellow nurses and other keyworkers. I am grateful for your bravery and sacrifice,

Today I wanted to talk about the importance of hard work and consistency and the reason for this is, I have just published my first book Mental Wellness and Spirituality: 40 life lessons for success from a mental health nurse. The book is available to buy on Amazon and also as an e-book on kindle. This book has come about as a result of me working consistently on a regular basis, but also by me continually taking small steps every day to ensure that I was meeting my daily targets. So the lesson is if you have a big dream, or if you have something that you trying to achieve. Instead of procrastinating, instead of worrying about what other people are going to say or what they think just do something. Just start doing something towards meeting your goal, talking about it with no action, dreaming about it with no action will not enable you to achieve the goal that you have. Actually putting you thoughts your words into action is what is going to help you achieve your goal. Then doing that regularly and consistently consistency is key, without consistency you will not achieve your goal. Start with something small if you like to give you the confidence that it will work and that it is possible for you to achieve your goals and then work from there. If you need motivation then my book is perfect for you, check it out on Amazon, it’s called Mental Wellness and Spirituality: 40 Life Lessons for Success From A Mental Health Nurse and my name is Cindy Mukombegumi . For anyone who gets in touch with me directly either on my Instagram in my using my Instagram handle which is mental_wellness_cindy get in touch and get a copy of the book. Take pictures of yourself reading the book share those pictures and use hashtag #cindymuko , also gift the book to somebody who needs it! Thank you for all the support.

I finally know my purpose and had to share this with you all. Do you know your purpose? This realisation is life changing.

Every little helps. Every little helps as the saying goes. When it comes to finding happiness, small steps make a big difference. It’s Simple. Instead of thinking positive thoughts start doing positive things, instead of making big plans for the future, start doing small things every day that make you happy. Don’t worry if you chosen task feels too small. If it moves you closer to your goals, it is worth doing. If you want to get in shape, start going for a five minute walk and committing to doing that every day. If you want to make friends, focus on pursuing your own passions first. Just take the first step to committing to doing something daily that enables you to achieve your bigger dreams. Stay connected to the possibilities instead of all the things that could go wrong or hold you back. So what big dreams and visions do you have at the moment, but you’ve not started because you have the enormity of them drowning you? How can you break them down into small manageable chunks to make it easier to do and thus easier to start? What ever your dreams or ambitions start doing something small towards them today!

How to measure success We are now 22 days into 2020, how are you doing with your resolutions? If you made any that is. Whether your goal was losing weight, dry January, starting a new habit or just having a different vision in this year. Have you stopped to check in with yourself to measure progress or just to reflect on the impact that the changes have made to your life so far? And why is it important to do so. When you take time to reflect on experiences, it gives you an opportunity to look at them once again thoughtfully. Reflection helps to set the tone for the next step, and also gives positive reinforcement to all that has been accomplished. Some easy steps that you can take to make reflection a part of your daily life are: 1-Write in a journal – this can help with reflecting on daily intentions. Write down three positive things that happened, as well as three negative or unfortunate things. The main aim is to start and get into the habit of finding time to reflect every day and documenting it. 2-Experience nature – simply take a walk or go for a hike or bike ride without technology. Take a deep breath and appreciate the beauty that is right in front of you. 3- At bedtime – take a moment to reflect, this will help you clear your mind and centre yourself with your breath. Reflecting regularly will help to keep you on track with your goals, that’s giving you a better chance of achieving them. So if regular reflection has to date not been a part of your life pick one of the three options journalling, experiencing nature or a bedtime routine of reflection, and do this for the next seven days. See if this makes a difference to your life and see if it makes a difference to you being able to achieve your goals.

https://mentalwellness.teachable.com/p/master-your-mental-health Yes it is finally here! Please check it out and let know what you think.

Have you ever thought about why during the flight safety procedures they tell you if the oxygen masks are activated put on your mask first before helping anyone else including your children? Well that is because for you to be able to help others around you or to be able to meet their expectations you need to be healthy enough to do so. Expectations make us suffer. They make you feel like you’re living someone else’s life. This is because they allow other people to determine your choices. Pleasing other people is like chasing a moving target. Everyone has different hopes for you. Expectations are also an illusion. By trying to please everyone, we end up pleasing no one, ourselves included. That is why most people do not live the life they want. Everyone feels frustrated and disappointed. We do live our lives trying to fulfil expectation, both our own and others. Sometimes they can be daunting, but ignoring them will not make them go away. You need to learn how to deal with them , And rise to the challenge so what steps can you take to do this: 1- keep your promises but be aware of exceeding them – exceeding expectations is not necessarily better than meeting them. 2- do not confuse expectations for reality – just because you’re expected to get married and have children does not necessarily mean that it is going to happen or that you need to do it. 3 – discuss with others to clarify their expectations – expectations are abstract, not always clearly defined or expressed. So by talking them through you will get more clarity. 4 - give yourself credit for the steps you take towards complete success – the small successes add up. 5 – keep a goal journal – it will help you gain insight and understanding into which expectations are realistic and which are not. 6 – delegate whenever you can – there are some things you cannot control let go and allow yourself to relax. Importantly give yourself a break. Don’t let your mind settle on what you could be doing but instead see value in relaxation. Life is like a fragile glass, it would break sooner or later rather than expecting things to happen one way, enjoy them for what they are and well they lost.

Why saying I Love You especially to children is important. Those 3 little words I love you, saying them may seem like such a small thing in the grand scheme of things but in reality it’s not. The words I love you have inspired countless poems, songs and works of art but when it comes to saying I love you to our children, for some it comes easily but for others not so much, they need reminders as to why saying these 3 little words is nice for the children to hear. But can we say it too little or too much? And why is it important? One school of thought says it’s essential to say it because we tend to assume people know we love them from the way we treat them, but this is not always true and we sometimes find out later in life when someone is in therapy as an adult, and they say my mother never said I love you. They go on to say that it does make a big difference also because as a child you learn how to express your feelings ready for your own relationships later on. Personally I don’t think those words can be said too much, it is how they are said, so long as the sentiment is authentic and heartfelt. So why is saying I love you and meaning it important to children? 1- It instills courage – when a child knows that the parents love them unconditionally, it helps to build the courage which gives them stability to try new things and take risks. 2- It models what love is – showing our children what love really is, is very important to their future relationships and self-esteem 3 – It lets them know they are not alone – that they have someone in the corner which is important for their mental wellness 4 – It builds trust – building trust is an important foundation for any relationship. As parents though they are a lot of other things that we can do to show our children that we care such as, listening to them when they talk to us and when they want to tell us something, we can also show them through physical expression of love such as cuddles or kisses or even holding hands and we can also show them by sharing quality time such as reading a book or playing a game and doing activities together. All of these are just as important if not more important than the words themselves. So now knowing that the amount of affection you receive as a child might impact on adult relationships. What are you going to change today about the way you parent your children, whether you received affection as a child or not let’s break the no love cycle that exists in some families.

Time is the most valuable thing to everyone.

Studies have shown that having supportive relationships is a strong protective factor against mental illness. Find out how to build yours.

Anxiety is something everyone experiences at times, and feeling anxious is a perfectly natural reaction to some situations. But sometimes feelings of anxiety can be constant, overwhelming or out of proportion to the situation and this can affect your daily life. The good news is there are plenty of things you can try to help cope with anxiety.

Making new year resolutions is helpful but you should not wait for this. Any day is a good day to get started with your goals. Why wait to do tomorrow, what you can do today, right. Start when you are still feeling most motivated not when you have scared yourself to death with the prospect of change or even failure. Happy new year, and remember any day not just the 1st of January is good for crushing your goals.

Having a plan will make achieving your goals possible. Have a listen

Christmas is not going to be an easy time for everyone have a listen for some survival tips

Are you ready for the busy time ahead. Listen for some survival tips.

I have a few 1on1 spaces left for the start of the year please get in touch if you want to start 2020 with the right mindset

You are stronger than Depression.

Feel the fear and do it anyway!

Breakups can be a great opportunity to care for yourself again.

Poor work life balance can lead to some serious consequences.

Should you always answer truthfully when someone asks you this question. Have a listen.

No one wants to do things that are #difficult or a #struggle or outside of our #comfort zones. So we tend to #selfsabotage. Some of the signs of self sabotage are: 1) #Procrastination- which is the action of #delaying or #postponing something. 2) #Breaking #promises to yourself. 3) Refusing to seek #support, even when you know you need it. 4) #Prioritising comfort over progress. All of these things are self #betrayal, because we convince ourselves that we do not want the things that are really #important to us. We then turn to #selfmedicating with things like #food, #drugs and #alcohol, as ways of comforting ourselves. In the moment it may seem small but the self medicating adds up and changes the way we feel and behave. Once we lose #trust in our own words and our own #promises, we then lose our #confidence and we lose hope. We then stop even trying to begin to make #changes. So what can we do about this? Start by making one small promise to yourself #duetwithhollyh today, and then make it your absolute priority to keep it. That will start a new habit of keeping your promise to yourself. Let me know how you get on.

You can’t stop the waves , but you can #learn to surf. #Changes, #challenges and #problems can arise at any time, whether you like it or not! So it’s #important to identify the things that you can and cannot #control. Imagine a #difficult situation you have encountered today or at any other time. How did you deal with it? Where you able to stop and rationally think it through? Or did you completely or even partially fall apart? How you respond to problems determines how #successful you will likely be in solving them. You will not always be able to resolve a situation in the way that you would like, but you need to take #control when you can, and #act decisively when you can not. So how can you solve problems or challenging situations. I use a method which I read in a book called The #Critically #Reflective Practitioner by Neil Thompson and Sue Thompson. It’s a versatile problem solving and time and stress management tool that identifies 3 ways to respond to challenges; 1) Control : Identify the issues or elements of the situation that you control 2) Influence : Identify the elements that you can’t control, but that you can influence 3) Accept : Identify the things that you can neither control nor influence, and adapt accordingly. An easy way to remember is using the acronym C-change I-influence A-accept Understanding these potential responses helps you put problems in #perspective more easily and easily get a sense of what you can and cannot #accomplish. This then enables you to focus your efforts where they will have the most impact. So next time you find yourself dealing with a challenge or problem apply this C.I.A. You will be surprised how quickly you will resolve issues and move on to other more #productive things to do with your time and #stress. Let me know how you get on.

Nothing holds you back more than your own #insecurities. Do you find yourself dwelling on negative #thoughts about your self, repeatedly putting yourself down, #criticising yourself, comparing yourself to other people you think are perfect? When you make a #mistake, do you think it’s absolutely awful, that anyone else would have done a better job, and it’s an example of some #permanent flaws you have? If so, then like many people, you are often your own worst enemy, #negating everything you do and blowing things up as if your mistakes are the worst that anyone can #imagine. This is due to the self critical voice that defeats you before you start, robs you of any credit for anything that you do, and makes you #afraid of trying anything because you fear the #loathing and #regret that will follow. So what are some #techniques you can use to defeat this self critical voice, so that you can feel better about being a real human being: 1) Add a #positive self message to an image- put it on your phone, laptop, bathroom mirror and message board. 2) Look in the mirror- smile and #compliment your self on one quality or trait you like. 3) Remind yourself- no one can do everything but everyone can do something. 4) Send yourself a loving text- keep it and re-read it often. 5) Keep a self praise journal- each time you feel pleased by something you have done or said jot it down, make a voice memo on your phone. 6) Recognise where your voices come from- in a lot of cases the voices are expressing #attitudes that were directed towards us as children. This inner critical #voice plays different roles in different people’s lives. For some they do keep them on track but for a majority of us, they #stop us from even starting. What does your inner voice do for you. Whatever your inner voice does for you, I always start with identifying whose voice it is I am hearing, and then work through the issue that is bringing it up. It’s a #daily #struggle. You are confined only by the walls you build yourself. So work hard to break through.

Create growth and change. Increase your capacity to produce and handle the challenges around you.

If you have a dream of something you want to achieve the make sure your actions meet you ambition

Nothing in life is free. Nothing happens overnight and in case you missed it. There is no overnight success.

A salary is a drug they give you when they want you to forget about your dreams. The fear of failure in an entrepreneurs path, is the most important motivator they have got. This is because they start their journey by saying i am going to quit the security of a salary. This is because it is very easy to stay in that world where somebody is mitigating your risk. You just have to perform certain tasks, do them well for a third of your day and they will feed you a salary and you do not have to think about anything else and that for a lot of people works. There is nothing wrong with that, great employees are extremely valuable to building enterprises. But when you leave that path you put at risk income that you need to eat with, and that fear of failure is an extremely motivating factor to keep you going on this different journey. So how is an entrepreneur defined , it is somebody that understands that they are responsible for every single failure and everything stops at them. They are somebody who needs to figure something out. Its somebody who thinks outside the box and when everyone else says no they say yes. Entrepreneurship gives you freedom and the ability to be your own boss. However as an entrepreneur you can make mistakes, and the worst mistake you can make is to not admit your failures and continue to try and resusitate a project with yours and other peoples money. Have a time limit for every project. 3-5 years is what most gurus suggest. So what indicators can you use to measure success? This is different for different people. It could be the money you are making or that the idea is getting traction with the customers or how many people use the platform. But when something does not work out embrace the failure, embrace the lose and remember the lessons of why it failed. Then move on to the next thing. Do not let failure demotivate you. This message is important because 80-90% of start ups fail. Realise something is not working before it kicks ou out of the game for GOOD! You can recover from small mistakes. Entrepreneurship is about taking responsibility for your actions and understanding that there are many people that will help you in regards to your succes, but only you will be the one that is responsible for your failures. So just remember you might not succeed at first but even the best entrepreneurs failed at first, so go ahead and take your swings it is what the greats do.

Small consistent actions taken on a daily basis are the most helpful

It all comes down to one choice, risk or regret. You either take the intelligent risk, or wish you had. You take the risk or suffer the regret. What is worse, the pain of risk or regret? Now i am no expert, but i think the answer should be obvious. Now just because it is obvious, does not always mean it is the easiest answer to make. Some decisions are hard to make, some are a no brainier. Going out on a limb can be downright terrifying, but sometimes the biggest leaps are also the ones that are worth making. To get you started here are 5 risks you will never regret taking: 1) Saying No- be selective about the things you engage with, so you can be really present for the stuff that you are doing. Trying to accomplish too much will stress you out in the process. 2) Being Yourself- being who you truly are, drawing your energy from that true core will make you more powerful and will enable you to do things your way. 3) Taking that trip across the country (or across the globe)- its no secret that planning a trip can help boost your emotional wellness. 4) Speaking up at work- it may be scary sharing your ideas with everyone in your company meeting, but a consistent voice at work is key to growth and success. 5) Asking for help- by asking for help you are not being weak, you are being strong. Our genes and our socialization favor us to be risk averse. Our distant ancestors learned and we know that jumping off cliffs and running toward bears usually does not work out well. Its proven that we take mental shortcuts, have biases and are ensared by mental traps that lead us away from taking risks whether we know it at the time or even in retrospect. We however take 'good' risks because regret is a powerful emotion. We dont want to feel regret and seek to avoid it, we not only can feel regret after making a choice, regret that we did not choose what might have been a better option, but we are capable of forecasting our future regret and taking action now to avoid future regret for not acting. Its about knowing when to make a tuff call and taking a leap of faith. Write down a risk you are considering. Everything is scary until you do it. So what is your choice going to be?

Sibling rivalry, aaaaaaah!!!! If you a parent or relative or friend to anyone with siblings who constantly fight, or you are a sibling who fought constantly, you know where i am coming from. Sibling rivalry is a type of competition or animosity among siblings. Siblings generally spend more time together during childhood than they do with parents. Their bond is often complicated and is influenced by factors such as parental treatment, birth order, personality and people and experiences outside the family. Sibling rivalry is particularly intense when children are very close in age and of the same gender and or where one or both children are intellectually gifted. It is a concern for almost all parents of two o more children. Problems often start right after the birth of the second child. It usually continues throughout childhood and can be very frustrating and stressful to parents. What causes sibling rivalry? 1) Each child is competing to define who they are 2) Children feel they are getting unequal amounts of your attention, discipline and responsibility. 3) A child's development stages will affect how mature they are and how they share your attention and get along 4) Developmental disorders such as Autism and other illnesses. 5) Stress in the parents 6) Stress in children's lives can shorten their fuses and decrease their ability to tolerate frustration, leading to more conflict What can you do 1) Do not play favorites 2) Do not compare your children e.g. your brother gets better grades 3) Set your kids up to cooperate rather than compete 4) Do not get involved, of course step in if there is a danger of physical harm 5) Set ground rules for acceptable behaviour I certainly needed to research and hear this message today as my sons are currently going through this phase. I hope like some they will grow out of this and form a close lasting relationship. Till then the parenting journey continues.