Y'all Need This Podcast

We made a sad attempt to talk about baseball this week before realizing Jay B was the only true fan in the room. Then we spent the rest of the time figuring out what other, “normal” people do when they’re not watchin’ 84 hours of (insert your go-to sport’s team here).

Ok, hear us out. A groom in East Texas robbed a bank the day before his wedding apparently as a last ditch effort to pay for the ring and the venue. We’re calling BS and here’s why.

Randy Taylor's beef with Jimmy Dean sausage got us talking about breakfast today and now we're all starving. Y'all take a listen and decide what you think the most Texan breakfast is while we go get some bacon, egg and cheese tacos.

We’re talking about fall, y’all. Since these 90 degree days are gonna last for the next 84 years we wanted to talk about how Texans embrace fall. And I’m proud to say we made it through the conversation without a single mention of a PSL.

It’s about time somebody said something about the White Claw epidemic in our country, so we took it upon ourselves to clear some things up. Are they Texan? The real question is, would you rather party with George Strait or the cast of the Jersey Shore?

We’re taking it on the road to Dallas this week, y’all! From what’s really behind the title of "America’s Team” to everything fried coming out of the State Fair this year. We’ll give ya a hint, Big Red Chicken Bread. Y’all better come hungry to this episode!

I was appalled that anyone would lump our great state in with the likes of Maine and Alaska, but here we are. Today, I take on a fairly ridiculous debate that was waged on Twitter about Texas and its standing as the most prideful state.

Heaven forbid one day we have to leave this beautiful state we call home and move somewhere over yonder, BUT if that day comes we deserve a true Texas send off. On this episode we put together a five course meal that even our southern mothers could be proud of.

How do y’all take your tea? Sweet? Unsweet? Sugar with a hint of tea? 50/50? Arnold Palmer? Flavored? With lemon? Light ice? All the ice? Now that you’re clear on what we’re debatin’, let’s get to it! Because there’s always a right and a wrong in our office.

Here's a Texas Fire Rant on rules of the road that many Texans seem to miss out on. Between blinkers, waves, and the left lane, all Texans need to hear this.

Of all of the subjects our audience asks that we weigh in on, the great beans in chili debate has to be the biggest and longest running. Today, we make a statement.

When we heard our graphic designer pronounce New Braunfels as “New Bronze Fulls” for the 80th time today we knew something had to be done. Lessons had to be learnt. We phoned in a few friends and got to the bottom of some good old fashioned Texas pronunciations on this episode.

Is there an epidemic of Blue Bell lickers or is this much ado about nothin'? Either way, it's gross, but on today's Texas Hot Take, we discuss whether the punishment fits the crime. We also discuss toilet papering houses and drive-by-fireworking.Here's the CBS article about the Louisiana man arrested for licking ice cream: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/blue-bell-ice-cream-licker-lenise-martin-licking-blue-bell-creameries-louisiana-belle-rose/And Dan Solomon's take on the disparity between the lack of criminal charges in the 4 Blue Bell deaths and the Lufkin Licker outrage: https://www.texasmonthly.com/the-culture/worse-things-have-happened-to-blue-bell-ice-cream-than-a-gross-prank-at-walmart/And the clip of the drive-by fireworks at Jay B's house: https://video.nest.com/clip/74c034208aad4a2ab2a04758b4a243a3.mp4

There was a tweet out of New York that caught our attention this morning. Long story short the words patriarchy and sexism were used to describe air conditioning. Seeing as how AC is a staple everywhere from your car to your favorite dive bar in Texas we decided it was a pretty important issue to tackle on the podcast today. Take a listen and let us know what y’all think.Dive in to the New York Times article that we discuss on the show here: https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/03/style/air-conditioning-obsession.html

We've got a bonus episode for any newly minted Texans who missed out on the two years of Texas history that the rest of us got. It's a short episode, but it's packed with historical accuracy. (Mostly accurate)

How long do you have to live in Texas to be considered a Texan? As y’all already know we have a lot of pride around these parts. So how long does it really take to get yourself inducted into the cool kids club of America? We came up with a list of criteria we thought should be required for anyone to pass the Texan test.

We’re back with our 17th episode, and it’s an important one. It might seem crazy that Texas would invade another state, but if we truly want to be the largest state in the United States, we might have to resort to that. Today, we debate the invasion strategy.

As it turns out we've all been told a lot of lies as children and as Texans. On today's episode, we dug in to some of the lies our parents told us and the things we thought were illegal in Texas, but aren't.

Processing the news about Whataburger's sale has been intense. Especially for us on the Texas Humor team since EVERYONE messaged us about it on pretty much every single social media channel. Today, we discussed the news and gave our take on what it might mean for the iconic brand.

I'm baffled. Yes, baffled as to why people actually eat Jack In the Box tacos. It's never made any sense to me at all. As it turns out, I'm in the minority on that though. Almost the entire Texas Humor team is obsessed with them.On today's episode, we have a spirited debate on their quality and whether I should try them or not.The Wall Street Journal article on the tacos can be read here: https://www.wsj.com/articles/americans-eat-554-million-jack-in-the-box-tacos-a-year-and-no-one-knows-why-1483465285

We've had a lot of conversations about what the perfect Taco looked like, but none of us have ever agreed. Between that and all the Taco Talk that our friend Rich O'Toole does, we thought it would be a good topic for an episode.

This week, Twitter has been abuzz with a debate over which state has the best "Mount Rushmore of Musicians", if Mount Rushmores of Musicians were a thing. New Jersey thinks they're supreme. We naturally don't. We brought in a fella from New Jersey who agreed with us to lay down the law.

It has recently come to our attention in the Texas Humor office that our fearless leader, Jay B Sauceda, has never eaten at In-N-Out. Every Texan knows that you have to pick a lane when it comes to your go-to burger & fries so this week we decided to take y’all to the drive thru lane at In-N-Out to settle this once and for all. Hear about the good, the bad, the ugly, and a small emergency detour we made on the way back to the office.

Traffic y’all, amirite? This episode we decided to discuss potentially the worst part of our great state: its highways. Sometimes it literally seems like the construction on i35 has being going on since before Willie Nelson was born. But which city really has it the worst? We’ll tell y'all how we ranked the roads and give you some tricks for getting back and forth without hearing “are we there yet?!” on repeat from the back seat.Check out Silo Road's album here: https://geo.itunes.apple.com/us/album/signal-hill/1431555276?mt=1&app=musicThe crazy Buc-ee's trip: https://www.impulsivetravelerguy.com/buc-ee-mania-hitting-up-every-buc-ees-in-texas/2:30 Texas Bullet Train7:15 UberTexas8:00 John’s an Uber Virgin11:16 Visiting every Buc-ee’s17:00 Snacks for traveling22:00 Dad GPS Powers26:00 John can’t say New Braunfels29:50 We crown the worst traffic in Texas

We decided to play a game of good ole fashioned "Would Y'all Rather" for our first Friday episode. Painstakingly hard "this vs. that" questions that no Texan should ever have to encounter out in the wild.But, if you do, our team tackled a few for ya. Hear what we decided when faced with a colony of scorpions vs. a nope noodle (snake) in our bed or drinking sweaty beer from Willie's bandana vs. George's boot, and neither isn't an answer this round, y'all. And for reference sake, this is the photo of Kid Rock we were referring to: https://images.app.goo.gl/5GU5VvkvSfZ2xdBF7

We wanted to debate whether or not Austin is a Texan city, but we realized that we needed to understand what it meant to be Texan in the first place. On today’s episode we settled the debate once and for all. Or at least for this week. Since Austin is changing so fast, we’ll probably need to debate it again soon.For reference, the Dallas Morning News article that we dig in to on the air can be found here. It’s great: https://www.dallasnews.com/opinion/opinion/2011/03/01/voices-what-it-means-to-be-texan

We decided to dive in to Texan foods a bit further this week since I'm trying to figure out what dishes are uniquely Texan and which foods we like just because they're tasty. I also have a sneaking suspicion that Buc-ee's is part of a conspiracy. Plus Julio's Chips needs to hire a new engineer.With all of the Game of Thrones attention this week, we also thought it was important to at least discuss the idea of it taking place in Texas.Also, if you dig the song at the end of the show, make sure to give the band, Silo Road, a listen. Hear that album here: https://geo.itunes.apple.com/us/album/signal-hill/1431555276?mt=1&app=music

On today’s episode we dive deep in to the group of people known as Sneakerheads. Surprisingly, the digital gathering place of sneaker collecting is based right here in Texas. The founder of that site, NiceKicks.com, Matt Halfhill joins us in the studio to talk about Texas, sneakers, and why he picked the hill country over Canada or Fresno. We also hear from y’all about what types of shoes you wear regularly.And the shoes we reference in the show are here. Check em out.Air Jordan 1 - https://www.nike.com/launch/t/air-jordan-1-chicago/Air Jordan 11 Concord - https://www.nike.com/launch/t/air-jordan-11-concord-white-black/Air Jordan 13 - https://www.flightclub.com/air-jordans/air-jordan-13

We heard from A LOT of folks who wanted to tell us their late night Whataburger order, which led us to talk vegetarian BBQ. Should it be a thing? Is Game of Thrones worth watching? What part of the state is most survivable during a zombie apocalypse. And is George Strait being influenced by Post Malone? We covered those and more topics with the Texas Humor team this week.

On today's episode we tackle stereotypes. Which are accurate and which ain't?We also rolled out our newest segment, BBQ&A, during which we answer questions submitted by the followers of Texas Humor.We talk Chili, celebrity Parents, what to take when traveling outside of Texas, bro country, and train etiquette.

I sat down with Texas musician Charley Crockett to take about his love for South Texas, recent heart surgery, and ramblin' tendencies. Plus we hear from folks around Texas about their love for the Rio Grande Valley. Of course, those topics include South Padre Island, Tamales, and Tex-Mex.Check out Charley's single, How Low Can You Go here: https://geo.itunes.apple.com/us/album/how-low-can-you-go/1451643782?i=1451643786&mt=1&app=musicHow Low Can You Go is copyright The Next Waltz and reproduced here with their permission. Special thanks to Bruce and Kat.If you're reading this, don't forget the Alamo. In other words, Remember It.

Because of a beer and Texas Independence Day, we're kicking off our show with a very special guest. Governor Greg Abbott sat with us at his reception room at the state Capitol.We discussed invading other states, whether he'd run for President, and whether beans belong in chili or not.See the Wooly Willy we made for the Governor here: https://yallneedthispodcast.com/news/2019/3/1/our-first-show-the-governor