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  Advancing Thru Adversity #0  Know It – Who I Am By Louie Marsh, 11-15-2020   A college student was unhappy that he had to take a course in ornithology, which is a study of birds. This class had the reputation of being the most difficult class in the whole curriculum. And the professor was an extremely difficult professor. Everybody feared him. But it was a required course. As the course began, the professor announced there would be a test in 40 days & it would compose a large portion of the grade. Everybody studied. They took copious notes. They made sure they understood everything the professor said.  On the 40th day the students filed into the lecture hall extremely nervous. On the stage was a table with 5 cages on it. Each cage had a cover & beneath the cover they could see the feet & spindly legs of a bird.  At the sound of the bell, the professor addressed the students, “Here’s the test. You can see there are 5 birds & they’re all covered except for their feet & legs. You must tell me the identity of each of those 5 birds by looking only at their feet & legs.” Everyone had studied long & hard, but no one had anticipated such a test. And they were all sweating, trying to remember something, anything, that could help them pass the test.  Finally, one student stood up & said, “This is ridiculous. This is the craziest test I have every seen, & you’re the worst professor in this whole school.” He said, “I quit. I‘m out of here. I’m not going to take this test.” And he turned & walked toward the door. “Just a minute young man.” said the professor. “Who are you? I demand your name right now.” The young man stopped, took a long look at the professor & then pulling up both of his pant legs said, “You tell me."   1) START with a big question: WHO AM I?   "You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:13-16 (NIV)   SHOW BONHOEFFER PICTURE & POEM   Who Am I? by Dietrich Bonhoeffer   Who am I? They often tell me I stepped from my cell’s confinement Calmly, cheerfully, firmly, Like a squire from his country-house. Who am I? They often tell me I used to speak to my warders Freely and friendly and clearly, As though it were mine to command. Who am I? They also tell me I bore the days of misfortune Equally, smilingly, proudly, Like one accustomed to win.   Am I then really all that which other men tell of? Or am I only what I myself know of myself? Restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage, Struggling for breath, as though hands were compressing my throat, Yearning for colors, for flowers, for the voices of birds, Thirsting for words of kindness, for neighborliness, Tossing in expectation of great events, Powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance, Weary and empty at praying, at thinking, at making, Faint, and ready to say farewell to it all?   Who am I? This or the other? Am I one person today and tomorrow another? Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others, And before myself a contemptibly woebegone weakling? Or is something within me still like a beaten army, Fleeing in disorder from victory already achieved? Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of mine. Whoever I am, Thou knowest, 0 God, I am Thine!   Bablyon 5 – Vorlons & Shadows – The Shadows always asked, “What do you want?”  Vorlon’s always asked, “Who are you?”   2) UNDERSTAND what Jesus said.   “You – you alone are the salt of the earth…” Matt. 5:13 (RCH Lenski translation)   ONLY BELIEVERS are Salt & Light   I AM Salt & Light!   Not SHOULD, COULD, OUGHT   SHOW YODA PIC/QUOTE Do, or do not. There is no 'try.'  - Yoda (Fictional Star Wars Thing/Dude   Salt changes the nature of what it’s applied too. Light changes how we perceive reality.     3) CHOOSE to believe Jesus.   But if you don't want to serve the Lord, then choose today whom you will serve. Even if you choose the gods your ancestors served on the other side of the Euphrates or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you live, my family and I will still serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15 (GW)   Salt is good, but if the salt has lost its saltiness, how will you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with one another." Mark 9:50 (ESV)   4) REFUSE to be discouraged.   7  But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. 8  We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; 9  persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; 2 Corinthians 4:7-9 (ESV)   Throughout Western history, Christianity has endured seasons when our faith should have been forever defeated, if not obliterated. The church of Jesus Christ should have had a funeral with the fall of the Roman Empire, the spread of Islamic armies, the Enlightenment, political upheaval in Europe, or the philosophical attacks led by Marx, Darwin, Hume, Nietzsche, and Freud. But God brings dead things to life, and at the heart of our faith is belief in resurrection. InRead more at location 2979   Top of Form Bottom of Form The truth is, the world we live in today is a lot like the first-century context in which Christianity flourished. The Romans worshiped their nation and political leader; Pontius Pilate asked, “What is truth?”[234]; Paul encountered an “unknown god”[235]; the Greeks were openly pro-gay; the Ephesians were converted from witchcraft and demonic spirituality; and the Corinthian Christians needed to stop their cross-dressing and cancel their memberships at the pagan temples. But the gospel—the same gospel that’s alive and well today—transformed lives and spread despite all the conflict.   16  So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. 17  For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, 18  as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (ESV)   In order to do ministry in the odd world of intolerant tolerance, Bible-believing Christians will need to toughen up and turn the other cheek—rather than crumple in a heap—when slapped with words like hateful, bigoted, intolerant, shameful, cruel, unloving, homophobic, prejudiced, discriminatory, and more. Jesus told us to love our enemies; his assumption was that we would have enemies to love. Top of Form   The tolerant god is curiously tolerant of everyone and everything except the real God—because the tolerant god is the same serpent who appeared in the Garden so long ago   5) PROVE I believe it.   14  My brothers and sisters, what good does it do if someone claims to have faith but doesn't do any good things? Can this kind of faith save him? 15  Suppose a believer, whether a man or a woman, needs clothes or food 16  and one of you tells that person, “God be with you! Stay warm, and make sure you eat enough.” If you don't provide for that person's physical needs, what good does it do? 17  In the same way, faith by itself is dead if it doesn't cause you to do any good things. 18  Another person might say, “You have faith, but I do good things.” Show me your faith apart from the good things you do. I will show you my faith by the good things I do. 19  You believe that there is one God. That's fine! The demons also believe that, and they tremble with fear. James 2:14-19 (GW)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford   Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E7 D2 (dial tone, click) E: Hello. D: Hi Elvira. E: David. So where are you at? D: Where…? Oh. Um, we’ve talked once. E: Right. I am on number 7. This must be it. I t’s all so bloody confusing. It’s already happened, for me. D: Right. So *what’s* already happened? E: You’ve already done it. D: Done *what*? E: Made me remember. (deep breath) I… They will… (quickly) They are going to take my memories. (door opens) Have to go. Call again. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music "Somber Viola" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

howdy. Fucking do Double tap beer, politics and sports. It is weak. Fucking 17 or 24 or 39? I have no idea. It feels like I've been in my house forever. But we're gonna do Episode 19 year politics and sports. You're now listening. Thio Political commentary way should steer politics, sports This'd serious. Yeah, but it's fun all day and here we go. What the fuck is going on? Everybody is Joshua Valez and I am the host of your favorite podcast Beer, politics and sports That is double tapped beer, politics and sports. And, uh, we're in interesting times now, ladies and gentlemen, because we're in the age of no fucking sports. Um, I don't know about you, but I've been creating my own source of entertainment at home. I have dipped into some old construction and contracting days. I have recently re tiled my downstairs bathroom very proudly. I must say, I was able to do that in a mere three days, you know, it's 40 square feet, and in a mere three days, I was able to knock that shit out. So, in the sport of construction work, giving myself an A plus, probably more like a C minus, but an A plus for the effort. Weird times, though. Because what the fuck are all of you guys doing for entertainment? I would love to hear from you. Um, I've been asking throughout this thing. This is the 19th episode of Double Tap beer, Politics and sports, and I've been talking to you guys. I want some reviews and some questions and concerns. I would like to hear anything from you guys, actually, anything that gives me any sort of insight as to what you guys like about the show. What you dislike about the show. Not that I'm gonna fucking change it, because I do this the way that I want to do it. When I would just love to hear what you guys have to say. I kind of just like fucking doing this thing. And I would like to hear what you guys would like to hear more off. Um and I would also like to hear anything that you guys debate so that I can debate you. That's one of my things that I I love to do Is debate Some would call me Master debater Well again. Another sport for you guys who are aboard at home. Master Debating Wink wink. Well, this is beer, politics and sports. So today I am drinking Ah, Lago need as shop stir bid. That is the hop stupid l um it is an I p a. I enjoy I p that during a lot of them. Plus, if you're drinking craft beers, they're all over the place, Especially here in California. So I drink quite a few of them. This one is 8% alcohol by volume. And we're gonna review this while we're doing the show. That is the hop stupid by lager Need us. It is not very hoppy. Ah, medium hop, if you will. I really like this one. Um, I've had a couple of white Russians today. Isn't my drink by Russians, By the way, I haven't seen white Russians since the movie The dude. Um but we just so happen to have some Cholula in the fucking refrigerator. And my wife was like, Hey, babe, how about making some white Russians? I'm like, What the fuck do I need to make white Russians a jump on the old Interwebs? And, um, I gather that you must have vodka. So I jumped on my local insta cart tohave the Corona virus naysayers out there in the world to bring me some Tito's shut out to Tito's organic distilled vodka so I could make some white Russians for the wife and I They're pretty fucking delicious. It's literally vodka kalua, and the recipe calls for heavy whipping cream. But we just used plain Jane milk in a world where there's no fucking groceries. Anybody got time to go looking for heavy whipping cream? This is also another sport, um, competitive drinking of whatever the fuck. What do you guys drinking? Um, I've had a white Russian today, and, um, now log Anita's hop stupid l um yeah, so sports are pretty fucking stupid because there's nothing going on. So you just have to kind of entertain yourself all day, every day when you're not teaching your Children what you pay taxes for their teachers to teach him. Weird. Everything is so fucking backwards. Now, um, that is

#forparker #3 God Wants Me To Be Salt & Light By Louie Marsh, 1-19-2020   Intro – 3 slides.    1) Dare to ask the big question: WHO AM I?   13  “You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people’s feet. 14  “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Matthew 5:13-14 (ESV)   UNDERSTAND what Jesus said.   “You – you alone are the salt of the earth…” Matt. 5:13 (RCH Lenski translation)   SHOW BONHOEFFER PICTURE & POEM ON CUE Who Am I? by Dietrich Bonhoeffer Who am I? They often tell me I stepped from my cell’s confinement Calmly, cheerfully, firmly, Like a squire from his country-house. Who am I? They often tell me I used to speak to my warders Freely and friendly and clearly, As though it were mine to command. Who am I? They also tell me I bore the days of misfortune Equally, smilingly, proudly, Like one accustomed to win. Am I then really all that which other men tell of? Or am I only what I myself know of myself? Restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage, Struggling for breath, as though hands were compressing my throat, Yearning for colors, for flowers, for the voices of birds, Thirsting for words of kindness, for neighborliness, Tossing in expectation of great events, Powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance, Weary and empty at praying, at thinking, at making, Faint, and ready to say farewell to it all? Who am I? This or the other? Am I one person today and tomorrow another? Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others, And before myself a contemptibly woebegone weakling? Or is something within me still like a beaten army, Fleeing in disorder from victory already achieved? Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of mine. Whoever I am, Thou knowest, 0 God, I am Thine!   All followers of Jesus ALREADY ARE Salt & Light Not should, could, ought.   SHOW YODA PIC/QUOTE   Do, or do not. There is no 'try.' - Yoda (Fictional Star Wars Thing/Dude   Salt changes the nature of what it’s applied too. Light changes how we perceive reality.   As Salt I Need to Preserve…   1) Jesus as my FIRST love.   Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place. Revelation 2:4-5 (NIV)   "Go and proclaim in the hearing of Jerusalem, Thus says the Lord, "I remember the devotion of your youth, your love as a bride, how you followed me in the wilderness, in a land not sown. Jeremiah 2:2 (ESV)   Live for an audience of ONE.   We must focus on Jesus, the source and goal of our faith. He saw the joy ahead of him, so he endured death on the cross and ignored the disgrace it brought him. Then he received the highest position in heaven, the one next to the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2 (GW)   Like Jesus, dare to be BOLD!   Since we have such a hope, we are very bold, 2 Corinthians 3:12 (ESV)   Show cards!   2) My LOVE for God’s Word   I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect your word. Psalms 119:16 (NIV)   IMMERSE myself in the Word thru reading, study and meditating.   Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path. Psalms 119:105 (NIV)   My eyes anticipate the night watches, That I may meditate on Your word. Psalms 119:148 (NASB)   LIVE the Word   Do good to your servant, and I will live; I will obey your word. Psalms 119:17 (NIV)   To Live As Light I Need Too…   1) BELIEVE Jesus is the light of the world.   When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." John 8:12 (NIV)   The only reliable source of knowledge of God is   Salvation comes from Him ALONE.   2) LIVE like it’s true.   For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said: "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." Ephesians 5:8-14 (NIV)   Live to PLEASE   Figure out what will please Christ, and then do it. Ephesians 5:10 (MSG) Not just “follow the rules” but go above and beyond to please the God I love. No “Spiritual Lawyers” Allowed!!   Live a TRANSPARENT   Light exposes the true character of everything because light makes everything easy to see... Ephesians 5:13-14a (GW)   No Secrets!   What This Does Not Mean:   That I tell everyone everything about me all the time; That I tell everyone everything about me some of the time   That I tell everyone everything about me any of the time!   T – Too M – Much I - Information!   What This Does Mean!   No secrets – You’re Only As Sick As Your Secrets – No hidden, hypocritical life! I tell someone everything about me – and have open honest relationships with God and people.   Live like the MISSIONARY I am.   7  He said to them, “It is not for you to know times or seasons that the Father has fixed by his own authority. 8  But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.” Acts 1:7-8 (ESV)

This is a reupload as part two was posted for both episodes 51 and 52. So, here’s part one, the intended 51. Now back to the previously siphoned summary.All this is not to be annoying or boastful. What’s the point of bragging when nothing happens individually. I’m so flying-too-close-to-the-sun grateful for your having joined me on this weird, indulgent, documentarian, analytical, and community-forming journey through college’s end and post-college’s beginning. That’s sappy. Thank you for peering over this deep long abyss with me. That’s dark. In all seriousness, I spent years, as you did, in grade school and high school surrounded by humans. In college, for me at least, there were also several humans but I at times fled to spaces with many fewer humans or zero.After college, having changed my major again, except this time it wasn’t a major as much as it was a professional direction or lack of direction and this time there was no security of deans and bureaucracy and privilege, I saw an opportunity. I saw someone my age, except wildly more successful, with a podcast. So, I thought I can do that. If there is one thing Princeton has taught me, it’s that the seemingly unlikely, those deep in the margins, so down hardly anyone can see them, can effect miraculous things. I also thought I could finally do what I had shied away from doing. From telling my story. It was one of those narratives that often came in or out of mind space: who would care about my experiences in college? Who am I? They can figure it out themselves. All the rationalizing was powerless against something I may have once thought grand, David and Goliath-esque, lore from the days of old, JFK and grayscale films: kismet. Kismet can be Mundane. Silly. Your seeing this emoji of a cat

What should our relationship be with people who talk too much or otherwise annoy us? Should we write them off as too self-absorbed and move on? Or is there another way to relate? Today’s episode explores this issue.A listener in Florida contacted me recently about a problem they were having that I sometimes have: People who talk too much. People who talk AT you, rather than WITH you. “It is so very draining,” this listener commented. I can certainly relate. A few days ago I was at at a coffee shop waiting for my friend David to show up to help me with my web site. The place was crowded and the only empty table was next to a group of 3 guys, one of whom was very loud and who talked non-stop. He was holding court for his two friends, who could not have talked if they had wanted to. He had captured all the available air time for himself, and wasn’t going to release any of it for anyone. Watching his friends being talked AT like this made me wonder, “Why do they put up with him?” While waiting for my friend, I just wanted peace and quiet so I could think. It was quite annoying to be so close to what seemed to be this self-absorbed man who appeared to be rolling over his two friends with his inexhaustible amount of verbiage. Like my listener friend in Florida, we all know people like this. They can be exhausting. When they are not talking about themselves they may pause to ask a question, but then very soon turn the spotlight of the conversation back on to them. It’s like playing tennis where the talker serves the ball, you as the listener volley a response back, but then instead of hitting the ball back to you, the talker keeps it on his side of the net. How do yo relate with a person like this? Do you avoid them? Do you fight for air time? This is the subject of today’s show, How do I relate to people who talk too much? I don’t know if this would work for our listener friend from Florida, but in my better moments, when I’m not my usual self, I would begin to deal with this annoying problem of someone talking too much by focusing on ME. That’s right, with ME. I would deal with ME first. I would do so by asking myself a bunch of questions. Because often the solution to our difficulties often arise out of the questions we ask. Let’s use my recent coffee shop experience with the dominating talker as an example. Here is what I need to ask myself in situations like this. 1. Why does this annoying person bother me so much? The two friends of Mr. Talker Man were obviously not bothered by him. Why am I? They chose to meet to meet up with him at the coffee shop, so there must have been some perceived benefit in getting together with him. But why did it bother me and not them?While they had a choice to be in his presence, I did not. The only available table for me was right next to him. Could my lack of a reasonable choice be why I was bothered so much? I think there’s more to it than just that. 2. What need do I have in this situation that is not being met? The need for peace and calm so I can think and reflect. A busy coffee shop may not be the best place for this. So it may be my fault for having this unrealistic expectation. Maybe what I needed was to at least have my need for calm and quiet to be acknowledged. But then how would Mr. Talker Man, or anyone, know that’s what I needed? I didn’t even know until I thought about it later. 3. Does this situation trigger something else going on inside of me? Does it remind me of something else? If so, what is it? Yeah, I’ve been in conversations with people who talk AT me like our Florida listener. Where I feel like I’ve been pushed into a corner with a tsunami of words. Where I don’t get a turn to talk. Maybe that’s it, I want a turn. I don’t want to hear a monologue, I’d like a dialog. Maybe this situation reminds me of other conversations in the past where a dominating talker has little or no interest in what I have to say. Maybe this event is just triggering my feelings of being marginalized in other areas of my life. Hmm. 4. Could it be that what is annoying me about this person is a flaw I have myself? Is it possible I’m not much different than the person who annoys me? Ouch. Yeah, I can recall leaving a conversation with friends when I’ve been so animated, and realize later I talked way too much. I’m going have to try harder next time. Having done some self-examination of myself, it would now be helpful to consider the annoying person, the dominant talker, by asking a bunch of questions of ourself about the other person. 5. How did they get this way, with talking too much or other annoying behavior? What was their upbringing like? Large family? Did they have no voice? Did they have to fight for air time? 6. What is the payoff for the person to dominate conversations like they do? Every behavior has a pay off, some benefit to it, otherwise we would not engage in that behavior. I wonder what it is for dominating talkers. I wonder it it could be he needs to be the center of attention to feel good about himself. I wonder if he’s afraid of people getting too close to him relationally, that he takes over the air waves to protect himself from others getting to know him. Hmm. 7. Could talking too much be a strategy they developed years ago when they were younger - that worked for them then. But now it’s doing just the opposite? We sometimes do this when we’ve come from a dysfunctional childhood. We developed skills that helped us survive back then, but we continue to use them in the here and now as adults, even though they’re no longer appropriate or helpful. 8. Is this the one area where they can exert a measure of control? Perhaps they lack control in other areas of their life, and this is the one part of their life where they do have control. 9. Is the talker just self-absorbed, or is he just lonely? Peggy Noonan, in a recent Wall Street Journal article about the manufactured political strife in our country, quoted the Irish saying, “Contention is better than Loneliness.” We do all kinds of things to combat the loneliness many of us feel. Here’s an example.      [The Bible study story with "Mary"] It would have been easy to write Mary off as just self-absorbed. But there was something deeper going on. She was just lonely.  It’s a lot trickier when it comes to dealing with our friends who talk too much, or otherwise annoy us. 10. How can I be more like friends of the talker and embrace who the talker is rather than want to flee from him? 11. Would setting a boundary with people like this be a good idea, or would it be just an excuse to be self-protective and distance myself? 12. How much energy do I have available for this relationship? If I invest more fully in this relationship, will that take me away from other relationships that are of higher priority? 13. Should I have a heart to heart talk with my friend, about what they’re doing that annoys me? Story of Tom and  “Let me ask you this….” 14. Why is it hard for me to look upon people like this with compassion, like “Sheep without a Shepherd” like Jesus does ? How can I be more like Jesus? 15. How can I show grace and cut the person some slack? Before I close, here’s the he main take-away from today’s episode, our show in a sentence People who annoy us often expose hidden issues within us, that when exposed and dealt with, can lead us to more fulfilling relationships with people. Here’s a way you can respond to today’s show Think of an annoying person in your life. Ask yourself the questions I suggest, and see if it doesn’t move the needle of your compassion meter just a little more into the positive zone. You’ll find those questions in the show notes. Coming up next week I will talk about the most important relationship of all. And as if that was not enough, I’ll answer the most common question I get about this podcast: Who is Carol? Be sure to tune in next week to find out. Closing I hope you found today’s episode beneficial in considering the issue raised from our listener in Florida, How do I relate to people who talk too much. I’d love to hear from more of you about relationship issues or questions on your mind…as long as they’re not dating questions. I’ll leave that to the gazillion of other podcasts that focus on that. You can send an email to me at john@caringforothers.org. Finally, If you’d like to help see this podcast grow, please write a brief review in iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts. I would greatly appreciate that as it will help the word about what we are doing.. Relationship Quote of the Week The only questions that really matter are the ones you ask yours      ~ Ursula K. Le Guin Well that’s it for now, I look forward to connecting with you next week. Bye for now.

I got a comment on my blog last week that equally fucked me off as it did make me laugh. It said, ‘stop writing all of this dry AF blogging content and get back to talking about anal and dating.’ Now if you’re new to me - this is in reference to the fact I used to blog more heavily about sex and dating. It initially fucked me off because I was upset at someone giving me internet hate. And then I was upset at the thought I was losing readers and turning people off with my change in direction. I was frustrated. I thought, why can’t that person just bugger off and get a life? I probably went on a Twitter rant about it. And another thing happened last week too. I turned down about £5,000 worth of brand collaborations, with huge, well known brands. They all seemed to come in at once and they all had one thing in common. In today’s episode I’m going to talk to you about your people. And why they matter for growing your blog. Right let’s go back to that shitty comment. It’s not the first one I’ve had like that. Since I’ve launched the podcast, offered blogger coaching and started writing more blogging content on my site, I’ve had a few. All disgruntled readers who followed me during my single days in 2016, engaged in my dating stories and silly listicles on sex and were hopefully entertained by the content I was putting out. And they’re pissed off now. Pissed off because I don’t really do that any more. Sure, when the Inspo strikes, I like nothing more than rattling off a funny post - mainly to entertain myself nowadays. Of course they could just unfollow me or read someone else’s blog but I’ve learned something about these people. They feel entitled. They’ve supported me for so long and invested so much in my journey that they feel let down that I now have a fiancé, a business and a blogging focus because when they entered me (whaaaat) I was single, in a job I was miserable in and blogged about blow jobs. And I kind of get it. I’m not serving them any more. The answer is that they should of course just unfollow me and be served elsewhere - sorry for all the innuendos but hey, it’s me. But perhaps they’re still holding out hope I’ll return to serving them with what they want. And now let’s talk about those brand deals. When I first went full time, I thought I had to take every collaboration offered to me because I was terrified about paying my rent. My previous approach to sponsored content - which was only excepting things I genuinely loved and could put my own creative spin on - went out the window a little bit because I was terrified I’d have to pick up a day or two supply teaching to cover my bills. But as the year as gone on and I’m nearly at a year of being a full time blogger, I’m less concerned with worrying over whether I should take everything that’s offered JUST IN CASE and decided to focus on finding those brands that more closely align with me, my interests and my values. The result of that is that I’m getting more and more repeat collaborations with brands, as opposed to boshing up the one offs and I can actually say no. And in some cases, I’m saying no to things I actually do really want to do, because I don’t see how it can help me serve my people. I’ll talk more about that in a sec. I cannot stress enough how important it is to find your people online. And to forget those who you don’t need to serve any more. Going back to the previous episodes on finding your niche, working out your ideal reader and working out who you are online are really key for this. Like I’ve mentioned before, my ideal reader/follower/coaching client is - a woman, in her mid twenties to mid thirties who is currently on a career path they don’t enjoy and they really want to carve out their online platforms into something they can take from a side hustle to a main income stream. They’re serious about growing their platforms and using their influence for good - I’m sorry but I’m not going to cater for wannabe Instagram models now am I? They understand that 5 minutes of fame on social media means nothing but establishing themselves as an expert in their niche will bring long lasting success. Sure, that’s probably a small subset of people compared to the hundreds that google ‘fingering’ and come across my blog every day. But it doesn’t matter. I know that everything I do needs to cater for them. So how do I do that? I create these podcasts! I write the blog posts which hopefully offer loads of value. I have the Facebook group where I’m on hand all the time for feedback and advice and I have my Membership. And my membership is another area that has really hammered this lesson home for me. Because we’ve lost members along the way. And initially I was sad about it because I worried I wasn’t doing a good enough job, or being helpful enough. That’s my confidence issues coming in to play. But as time goes on, and I learn more about serving my people - I just realised that as much as I love those gals, they weren’t my ‘ideal’ coaching clients IYSWIM? Perhaps they weren’t ready to invest time, imagination or unable to invest the money - I don’t judge them at all, I think they’re fucking amazing but equally I’m not sad about it. Because it helps me hone my ideal client. We’re full with the membership for now so there’s a waiting list - because as time goes on and I get more experienced, I’ve realised  again that I don’t need to accept anyone in because I want to be fully booked or make money - I’ve realised that I only really want to work with people who are my people. And I don’t care if that’s 5, 50 or 500! Hopefully you can see the point I’m arriving at. Finding your people isn’t about finding as many as possible. It’s serving those key few. In a world where we’re obsessed with chasing followers and growing numbers, we forget actually that those who are key in our growth are the ones who’ve been there all along. I recently joined The Coven which is a female entrepreneur membership/support group kinda thang and I had a chat with the amazing leader, Sapphire about all of this. She told me that all I need to focus on with my blog and my business is solving problems that my ideal audience face. And that’s it. So yes, I’m creating more blog content based solely on what you guys tell me through email, Facebook and comments you need help with. And yes, I’m putting a waiting list out for the membership so that I can make sure when I open it again, I only accept people who are truly my people - to join the rest of my galled (wait I can’t get away with saying that, I’m not cool enough) and yes I’ll be posting more on instagram about my work and YES I’m only going to take on brand collaborations where I feel I can either entertain you or provide you with something you want to see. And yes that may mean I lose old readers and followers who get the point that I’m not writing about blow jobs consistently any more. And I might lose Instagram followers who want to see what I had for lunch. And yes some of my members might fall away. But what’s left is that core group of people - brands, followers, friends - who are with me on this ride because they trust I’m with them. So what can you take away from this? I really really urge you to dig deep on who your ideal reader is. I urge to create content for them. I urge you to go out of your way to engage with them and be grateful for them. I urge you to reflect on the brand partnerships you’re coveting or completing and truly see whether they serve your people. And then I urge you to think about all of the ways you can serve your people! And feed back to me because I’m going to be doing an upcoming episode on all these ways very very soon! What’s been your biggest thing you’re taking away from this episode? Please email me, DM me or post in the Facebook group because I think it’s so so so important! Until next time, byeeee

Seriously though..how real are you? I'm only 80% sure at any given time I'm even existing at all..so, there's that. I blame LSD. Jay and Jed bring you another action-packed episode this week , and they start things off by discussing Jay breaking down and crying like a little child, Jed being awe-struck by a very on-point sermon he heard, and reading probably THE most akward text message ever from Dirty Mike. Then, Jed gets a chance to talk to Jon Fuller; author, podcaster and all-around badass. Man..I'm really into hyphens aren't I? They discuss what it means to be "real", and dive deep into Jon's past, where they find some striking similarities. Then Jed gets a prophetic word for him..and it's a good one. We round it out with a TIL about the reproductive habits of honey bees. Yup. Standard stuff. rureal.org jonbfuller@gmail.com for a chance to win a free book! churchandotherdrugs@gmail.com churchandotherdrugs.com patreon.com/churchandotherdrugs all $25 donors get a free shirt!

Let's face it, nerdy music would hardly exist if it weren't for nostalgia. So let's get nostalgic this episode - because it's been 10 years since the first Nerdapalooza!In this episode, Marc With a C talks to the face of Nerdapalooza, John "Hex" Carter, about one of the most important milestones in the history of the nerd music genre. Yes, this beloved music festival is now old enough to look back on. Time just flies by doesn't it? I They look back on the formative years of the earliest fests bearing this hallowed name, while we traipse through some of those early tunes from those bygone days - sandwiched by a couple of new nerdy jams for good measure! Please note: The views and history recounted by John "Hex" Carter are his opinions and recollections alone. They do not reflect the views of The Nerdy Show Network, Marc With A C, or the opinions of others involved in the production of Nerdapalooza. For tracklist, links and more info, head to the main episode page: https://nerdyshow.com/2017/12/nerdyfm-episode-003-december-2017/ ‎Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

When Jesus announced to His disciples that one of them would betray Him, each of them asked "Lord, is it I?" They knew deep within that all of them were capable of this worst kind of treason. And so are we. Unless we yield to the Holy Spirit and put our flesh in the back seat, we are capable of anything. Praise God that He doesn't leave us to muddle around!

When Jesus announced to His disciples that one of them would betray Him, each of them asked "Lord, is it I?" They knew deep within that all of them were capable of this worst kind of treason. And so are we. Unless we yield to the Holy Spirit and put our flesh in the back seat, we are capable of anything. Praise God that He doesn't leave us to muddle around!