Vidya by Pia & Bart

We explore vulnerability through personal experiences, beginning with the quote “Dance like no one is watching…” and how acts like dancing or singing often stir discomfort and self-consciousness. For many of us, these expressions bring up old memories of shame or judgment, often rooted in childhood. Exposing our inner selves feels risky, as if we might be rejected or ridiculed. We share stories—freezing during a speech, dancing sober for the first time in years—that reveal how vulnerability surfaces when we step outside our comfort zones. These moments remind us that shame lingers because, biologically, we associate exclusion with danger. Yet when we allow ourselves to show up authentically despite the fear, we connect more deeply—with ourselves and others. In professional settings, we see that vulnerability isn't about oversharing or emotional display—it's about building authentic human connection. When we as leaders admit we don't know, own our mistakes, or simply let down our guard, we foster trust and psychological safety. We reflect on the trust equation—credibility, reliability, and intimacy divided by self-orientation—and recognize that authenticity strengthens team dynamics. Vulnerability becomes a leadership asset, not a liability. Whether in a meeting, on a dance floor, or in a relationship, it's our willingness to be emotionally exposed, within thoughtful boundaries, that creates space for truth, learning, and meaningful connection.

In this episode, we explore the complexity and fluidity of identity, beginning with a playful challenge: how would we describe ourselves in the time it takes to ride an elevator? We unpack how our self-descriptions shift depending on context—age of the listener, setting, or even language. We share our discomfort with reducing identity to a concise pitch, noting how what we say tends to be externally focused (job, nationality, hobbies) rather than delving into personal values or deeper characteristics. We discuss how identity is often a story we tell ourselves and others, influenced by language, culture, and experience. The idea that different languages unlock different aspects of our identity was especially thought-provoking, revealing how language shapes not just communication but self-perception. We then move into how material elements—like clothing or gadgets—signal aspects of identity, both to ourselves and to others. Examples like yoga attire, running shoes, or the Oura ring illustrate how external symbols can reinforce internal self-concepts. The conversation highlights how adopting a new identity, such as becoming a runner or embracing a dual-city lifestyle, can precede and facilitate behaviour change. We also touch on the tension between comfort and authenticity in personal growth, and the challenge of integrating multiple, sometimes conflicting, roles into a cohesive sense of self. Ultimately, we raise the question: what parts of our identity do we want to evolve or let go of, and how can we consciously shape the stories we live by?

In this episode, we confront one of life's most profound and universal truths: death. Despite its inevitability, death remains a taboo topic in many cultures, often shrouded in fear and avoidance. We explore the concept of a “good death” versus a “bad death,” discussing how saying goodbye, letting go, and even planning one's end can create a more peaceful passing for both the dying and their loved ones. From personal anecdotes about witnessing death to cultural perspectives like Hindu cremation ceremonies in Varanasi, we examine how exposure to and understanding of death impacts our relationship with life. We also delve into practical preparations for death, from creating a will and organizing personal affairs to embracing the “Say It Now” philosophy—expressing gratitude and love to others while they're still here. Inspired by books like Die with Zero and The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, we reflect on the importance of living fully and intentionally. Whether it's experiencing life's milestones at the right time or ensuring you leave a meaningful legacy, this conversation invites us to embrace death as a reminder to live authentically and connect deeply.

In this episode, we dive into planning versus spontaneity, using the lens of personality types, particularly the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). We explore the dynamic between “judging” (J) and “perceiving” (P) traits, examining how these preferences play out in our daily lives, relationships, and work. We reflect on the benefits and challenges of structured planning, like creating routines and long-term strategies, versus the freedom and creativity of staying open to possibilities. Along the way, we share how these tendencies shape our decision-making, resource management, and overall quality of life. Through personal stories and insights, we discuss the importance of self-awareness in balancing these approaches. Whether it's planning for major life goals, fostering personal growth, or leaving room for spontaneity, we explore how to make our time and energy align with what truly matters. We invite you to join us in reflecting on your own relationship with planning, discovering how to find a rhythm that works for you, and considering where you might need a little more structure or a little more openness.

We often believe in the myth that relaxation must be earned—that we can only truly rest after being productive. However, we recognise that this belief, while deeply ingrained, is not necessarily helpful. Relaxation should not be conditional, yet many of us struggle to truly unwind. The conversation explores different perspectives on what relaxation means, distinguishing it from simply sleeping or taking a break. We reflect on how modern distractions, like social media, create the illusion of relaxation while actually adding to our stress. True relaxation, we realise, is about restoring our physical, mental, and emotional states—allowing us to reset and be more present in our daily lives. To truly relax, we find that engaging in structured activity before stillness can be a powerful method—whether through intense exercise, breathwork, or even laughter. Practices like yoga, running, or time spent in nature prepare us for a deeper state of relaxation, fostering resilience and creativity. We also acknowledge that relaxation looks different for everyone; for some, it involves solitude and quiet, while for others, it might be time spent with animals or engaging in hands-on activities. Ultimately, making relaxation an intentional part of our lives—rather than something squeezed in after productivity—allows us to live with greater balance, clarity, and well-being.

In this episode, we dive into the reflective process of personal growth and intention-setting as the year draws to a close. We explore how stillness, the balance of being versus doing, and self-leadership have been prominent themes in our lives throughout 2024. We emphasise cultivating personal growth through tools like journaling, meditation, and deliberate reflection on our life journeys. As we discuss, memories evolve over time, and journaling provides a unique way to connect with our past selves, enriching our reflections and guiding our future. For us, setting intentions isn't about rigid goal-setting but rather a flexible framework that helps align our aspirations with the more prominent themes of our lives. We also reflect on how stepping outside our comfort zones can spark profound growth. We emphasise the value of community and shared experiences in fostering growth, drawing on the connection and support of like-minded individuals. We discuss examples of transformative retreats and the importance of those in personal development. To close, we share a creative New Year's exercise: writing a letter to ourselves filled with intentions to be mailed later in the year as a reminder of our aspirations. This practice ties together the themes of reflection, growth, and intentional living that guide our journeys. Towards the end of the episode we talk about a personal growth challenge that will be launched on WhatsApp on 7 January. If you are interested in taking part, please contact Bart or Pia directly. You will find our contact details on vidya-cc.com

In this episode, we dive into the transformative power of breathwork with Tim van der Vliet (Bart's brother), a global breathwork coach and creator of the TT5 technique. Tim shares his journey from high-stress stock trading to finding balance and purpose through breathwork, eventually becoming one of the world's leading breathwork specialists. With his signature blend of science and simplicity, Tim explains how deliberate breathwork can reduce stress, improve focus, boost athletic performance, and even decrease inflammation. He emphasises the accessibility of breathwork, highlighting how just five minutes a day can create profound mental and physical well-being shifts. We also explore the science behind breathwork, discussing its effects on the autonomic nervous system, cardiovascular health, and cellular energy production. Tim demonstrates his TT5 technique—a quick and powerful practice that blends intentional breathing with moments of stillness. Whether you're seeking calm before a big meeting or looking to enhance your daily mindfulness routine, this episode offers practical insights and tools to harness the full potential of your breath. Visit Tim's website at https://www.timvandervliet.com/ or try the Breathing Room App, which is available on the App Store and Google Play.

In this episode, we explore the emotional responses that arise from common, everyday triggers, focusing on how we become aware of and manage them. The conversation starts with a look at the stress of queuing at airport gates, where many of us experience heightened anxiety over small things, like whether there will be space for our luggage. Even when we know the anxiety is irrational, it persists. This leads us to reflect on how being conscious of these reactions allows us to manage them better over time, even if they remain part of our lives. We touch on various examples, from stress at the airport to dealing with unknown callers and the immediate negative reactions they evoke. We delve deeper into the concept of triggers—both positive and negative—and how they influence our energy and interactions with the world around us. For example, the feeling of anger after hitting our head or the satisfaction of seeing a free taxi can have immediate emotional impacts. These triggers shape our behaviour and, by extension, the environment we share with others. By understanding what triggers us, we can start to regulate our reactions and potentially shift how we respond. The episode closes with the idea of keeping a “trigger journal” to better recognize the patterns in our emotional responses and become more mindful of how we bring our emotional state into our interactions.

In this podcast episode, we delve into the concept of mentorship, tracing its historical roots back to figures like Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle and exploring its evolution into the modern corporate and personal development contexts. We discuss the distinctions and overlaps between mentorship and coaching, pondering how each plays a role in personal and professional growth. The conversation reflects on how mentorship has been a fundamental part of human development, facilitating the transfer of wisdom across generations. We consider the nature of mentorship as a relationship where more experienced individuals share their knowledge. This is similar to and different from coaching, which is often more structured and may not require the coach to have direct experience in the same fields as their clients. Further, we explore our personal experiences with mentorship, both as mentors and mentees. We discuss how the mentorship dynamics can vary, emphasising that while mentors typically offer guidance drawn from their experience, the best mentor-mentee relationships are reciprocal, where both parties learn from each other. This reciprocity enriches the relationship, making it a profound learning experience for both. The dialogue also touches upon the informal mentorship roles we might play in our lives without necessarily labelling them as such, highlighting how these relationships shape personal and professional development in significant ways. The episode encourages listeners to reflect on their own relationships and consider whether they might benefit from seeking a mentor or becoming one, thus fostering a culture of continuous learning and wisdom-sharing.

In this podcast episode, we come back to one of our favourite topics: Learning. We discuss the importance of understanding and leveraging personal strengths in professional and personal development. By recounting our experiences from the past when learning wasn't a consciously integrated part of our lives to now, where it forms a crucial aspect of our daily activities, we emphasise the transformative power of learning. This reflection leads us to consider the various ways learning has shaped our careers, hobbies, and self-awareness, highlighting the shift from passive to active and intentional learning. We discuss how learning is intertwined with our values and how it manifests in different aspects of our lives, such as professional development, personal interests like drawing and cooking, and even understanding complex concepts through formal education or self-driven inquiry. The conversation brings to light the notion that learning can be a highly motivating factor, enhancing mastery and personal growth. We share insights on how adopting a learning mindset can transform perceived failures into valuable lessons, promoting a positive outlook and resilience. Through these reflections, we encourage listeners to cultivate a learner's attitude, deliberately integrate learning into their life's fabric, and appreciate the continuous opportunities for growth and development.

In this podcast episode, we explore the concept of the "corporate athlete," comparing the performance and preparation strategies of professional athletes to those of corporate professionals. The discussion begins with reflections on the Olympic Games, noting how athletes meticulously prepare for major events, emphasizing the importance of recovery, rest, and focus. We highlight the concept of categorizing tasks into A, B, and C "races," with A races being the most critical events requiring peak performance, while B and C races serve as preparation or less critical tasks. The conversation underscores the importance of planning, sustainability, and focus in corporate life, drawing parallels with how athletes manage their careers over the long term. We discuss the necessity of distinguishing between critical and less critical tasks, advocating for rest before major "races" and embracing a mindset that prioritizes recovery and resilience. The episode concludes by encouraging listeners to identify their "A races" in their professional lives and make deliberate changes to align their work habits with the practices of top athletes, ultimately aiming to achieve sustained high performance.

In this podcast episode, we delve into the profound influence that the people closest to us have on our personal growth and development. We explore the idea that "you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with," reflecting on how our relationships shape who we are. We discuss the dynamic nature of these relationships, noting that as the people around us change, so do we. This conversation is intertwined with personal anecdotes about family and the deliberate efforts to maintain strong sibling connections through annual trips and activities, emphasising the importance of intentional time spent together despite life's inevitable changes. Furthermore, we touch on reconnecting with old friends and the surprising depth and renewal these rekindled relationships can bring. This discussion branches into the strategies for maintaining these relationships, such as setting expectations and recognising the different roles various friends play in our lives. We highlight how these relationships mirror our personal development and discuss the potential shifts in dynamics as we evolve. The conversation invites listeners to consider who they spend their time with and how these choices affect their personal growth and happiness, encouraging a reflective approach to personal connections.

In this podcast episode, we explore the profound concept of rhythm in life as a more dynamic and integrated approach compared to the traditional notion of work-life balance. We recount a journey to Santiago de Compostela, where the experience of walking the pilgrimage illuminated thoughts about personal and environmental rhythms. We discuss how different rhythms, such as daily cycles and life stages, influence our actions and well-being. The conversation extends to how understanding these rhythms can lead to better integration of work and life, suggesting that life is not about balancing static elements but rather flowing with the natural rhythms that govern our existence. Delving deeper, we reflect on how aligning with these natural rhythms—like those of sleep and wakefulness influenced by natural light—can enhance our health and productivity. The idea is extended metaphorically to organisations, comparing the life stages of a company to seasons, which highlights the importance of adapting to each phase for sustainability. We also touch upon personal experiences that underscore the importance of recognising and honouring our individual rhythms, such as being a morning person or understanding our optimal times for productivity and rest. Through these reflections, we encourage listeners to think of rhythm as a continuous movement and alignment with one's intrinsic patterns, which offers a more fulfilling way to navigate life's complexities.

In this episode, we discuss the common misconceptions about healthy eating, emphasising that what is considered healthy can vary greatly among individuals. Our conversation highlights that ultra-processed foods like vegan burgers and certain breakfast cereals are often mistakenly perceived as healthy. We also touch on the importance of understanding what constitutes ultra-processed foods and their potential health implications. We further discuss the significance of whole foods, using examples like eggs and yoghurt, and the evolving perceptions of their health benefits over time. Then, we delve into broader aspects of nutrition, including the importance of timing of food intake, calorie intake, and diet variety. We advocate for a balanced approach to eating, suggesting an 80/20 rule where 80% of the diet consists of healthy, whole foods, and 20% allows for flexibility. We emphasise the importance of gut health, recommending a diet rich in fibre (prebiotics) and fermented foods (probiotics). The conversation also touches on the social and psychological aspects of eating, such as the benefits of sharing meals and being open to new dietary information.

In this podcast episode, we delve into the concept and importance of stillness in achieving clarity, productivity, and overall well-being. We share our personal experiences and the challenges of slowing down in a fast-paced world, highlighting that the discomfort felt during slower moments can actually lead to greater productivity and insight. Our discussion draws on insights from Ryan Holiday's book "Stillness is the Key," emphasising stillness as a universally recognised virtue across various philosophies and religions. We explore different methods to achieve stillness, such as meditation, yoga, and reducing distractions, and underscore their significance for mental and physical health. Additionally, we discuss practical applications and benefits of stillness, including enhanced creativity, more profound gratitude, and improved personal connections. We share anecdotes and strategies for integrating stillness into daily life, such as engaging in slow activities, practising mindfulness, and setting intentional periods for reflection and decompression. We suggest that embracing stillness can be a powerful tool for personal growth and stress management, encouraging listeners to explore what stillness means for them and how it can be cultivated in their own lives for better health, happiness, and performance.

On our business development trip to Spain, we find ourselves going for a run in the morning and realise we have quite different approaches to running. One of us is more structured, more planned, and measures and analyses a lot more data. The other just runs. You guess which is which! During our conversation, we delve into the reasons behind our fitness routines. We exercise for various reasons: the feeling of well-being, the joy of physical movement, the impact on our health, and the mental benefits like clarity and problem-solving. We also value the social connections, mental well-being, and personal growth that come with exercise. We emphasise the importance of incorporating various forms of exercise, including strength and resistance training, flexibility work, stability training and different intensities of cardio training, to maintain a balanced and holistic approach to our well-being. We also stress the importance of a varied exercise routine on our health and longevity, maximising the chances of staying disease-free when we grow older. Our central theme is finding motivation and purpose in our physical activities to maintain a consistent and fulfilling fitness routine.

In this conversation, we delve deeper into the fascinating realm of emotions and, in particular, negative emotions and how we can effectively deal with them. We reflect on our experiences with these emotions and explore the concept of Stoicism, an ancient philosophy that offers valuable insights into managing and minimising the impact of negativity in our lives. Moreover, we stress the significance of using negative emotions as sources of insight, leveraging them to enhance emotional intelligence and make informed decisions in our pursuit of personal growth and well-being. Our discussion highlights practical Stoic tools for navigating everyday challenges, emphasising the importance of understanding and addressing negative emotions. By reframing situations and embracing a Stoic perspective, we aim to limit the influence of these emotions and foster a more tranquil and virtuous life. In essence, this conversation revolves around the powerful techniques and philosophies that enable us to gain mastery over our emotional responses, contributing to a happier and more fulfilling existence.

In this conversation, we explore the significance of questions and their diverse applications in various roles and settings. Questions serve as connectors, bridging emotions, thoughts, and being. They create space for exploration, authenticity, and deeper understanding. The intention behind a question is crucial, and a curious, positive vibe enhances its impact. Being present in a dialogue is essential for conveying the true purpose behind a question. Concise, well-articulated questions often carry more weight, and silence can be a powerful tool in fostering reflection and deeper conversation. We also delve into how questions can be a valuable tool in parent-child relationships, helping parents connect with teenagers and young adults who may be entering a more closed-off phase. By asking open, thought-provoking questions, parents can engage their children in meaningful conversations. Similarly, questions can be a bridge to connect with older generations, allowing us to tap into their wisdom and gain perspectives on life and change. Ultimately, questioning is a versatile and powerful practice that transcends professions, enriching our interactions and deepening our understanding of ourselves and others.

We find ourselves in a recording studio surrounded by professional sound equipment, creating an environment that truly excites at least one of us! As we sit together, one of us with an analogue notebook and the other with a laptop, we reflect on our evolving note-taking habits. While acknowledging the shift towards electronic notes, we also appreciate the enduring charm of handwritten notes. Our discussion unfolds, transitioning into exploring the multifaceted world of note-taking, encompassing journaling, gratitude writing, meeting notes, reflection notes and learning summaries. We emphasise that note-taking is more than daily reflections; it's a versatile practice with numerous applications. The conversation pivots to the compelling reasons behind note-taking, delving into its power as a memory aid, an accurate record keeper, and an invaluable tool for introspection and personal growth. We stress the significance of documenting our thoughts, emotions, learnings and meeting details, highlighting the enduring importance of this practice as we navigate the complexities of life.

When we think about the words "stability" or "grounding," it conjures up feelings of calmness, peace, relaxation, and overall well-being. It's akin to maintaining a solid foundation that keeps us safe from harm. Conversely, an excess of stability or grounding can lead to sluggishness, weight gain, and inflexibility. For us, the concept of grounding extends beyond the physical realm. It's about finding our inner core, a point of navigation, and using it as a base from which we can explore and grow, both personally and physically. Just as we ensure stability before doing a squat in the gym, we see the importance of grounding in life. It's like having a safe haven to return to after adventures or experiences, a place where we can do simple, stabilizing activities like tidying our homes or indulging in comfort foods. Grounding provides a sense of balance amidst life's changes, allowing us to venture out while always knowing where we can come back to.

In today's conversation, we discuss leadership and its evolution in our programs. Over time, we've refined our approach, focusing on key leadership aspects. We explore the difference between leadership and management, emphasising how leadership goes beyond traditional roles. Our discussion highlights these essential elements in the leadership toolbox: Presence: Being fully engaged in the present moment, achieved through practices like mindfulness. Learning and Growth Mindset: Continuously seeking knowledge, embracing mistakes, and fostering personal growth. Self-awareness: Understanding one's personality and learning preferences, recognising learning obstacles, and appreciating diverse personalities. Culture and Values: Acknowledging personal values' role in shaping organisational culture and understanding the real impact - beyond written statements. Well-being: Prioritizing physical, mental, spiritual and emotional well-being, which leaders role model to their teams. Motivation: Inspiring and motivating teams by allowing them to find their purpose and work with mastery and autonomy. Coaching: Believing in individuals' potential, challenging, guiding, and supporting their growth through proper communication. Feedback: Recognising the importance of feedback and its challenges in practice. Leadership is multifaceted, requiring self-awareness and a deep understanding of the organisational context. We explored many of these topics in detail in previous podcast episodes.

In today's conversation, we explore the concept of simplicity and how it differs in our perceptions. We share our personal associations with simplicity and discuss contrasting notions of simplicity and complexity in various aspects of life, such as travel, lifestyle, possessions, and relationships. As we delve deeper, we realize that simplicity can be considered internal and external. Internally, we aim to reduce worry and declutter our minds, while externally, we strive for fewer possessions and intentional decision-making. We appreciate the benefits of simplicity, including reduced stress, enhanced mindfulness, and improved sleep. However, we acknowledge that simplicity is subjective and can be pursued in different ways based on our individual values, preferences, and circumstances. Ultimately, we believe that embracing simplicity, whether in thought, possessions, or lifestyle, may bring a sense of ease, mindfulness, and reduced worry to our lives.

In today's episode, we delve into the realm of personal growth, revisiting the topic we addressed in the episode of November 2022. We explore the reasons behind engaging in personal growth, highlighting the universal and individual benefits it brings. Reflecting on the influential people in our lives, we recognize the significance of journaling and reflection as essential tools for self-coaching and inner dialogue. We emphasize the importance of accountability and community support, whether through WhatsApp groups or habit trackers, in fostering personal growth. Deliberate reading becomes a valuable practice, allowing us to seek inspiration and insight from books that resonate with our present journey. Additionally, we encourage creating intentional experiences infused with fun, adventure, and curiosity, setting the stage for personal development. Our discussion presents practical steps to embark on this transformative journey, emphasizing self-awareness, intentionality, and the power of community support. As we explore personal growth, we invite you to embark on your own path of self-discovery and embrace the opportunities for growth that lie ahead.

Today's discussion revolves around our recognition of the importance of connection and the need to reconnect with others, ourselves, and content. We acknowledge that in our fast-paced lives, we often underestimate the significance of meaningful connections. We believe in the value of intentional and authentic connections, where we show up authentically, actively listen, and seek to understand before being understood. We also discuss the impact of technology on our connections, acknowledging that while it offers convenience, it can lead to superficial interactions and a sense of loneliness. We advocate for taking the time to reconnect, emphasizing activities like sharing meals, going for walks, and having face-to-face meetings to deepen our connections. We encourage you to reflect on your personal and professional connection maps, identify gaps and take action to foster more meaningful connections. By prioritizing genuine connections, we believe we can enhance our personal and professional lives, experiencing the benefits of deeper trust, better communication, and a greater sense of belonging.

This episode is a direct response to a request of one of our clients. We suggest you listen to this episode in conjunction with episode 33, which was released the week before Christmas one year ago. We again discuss the Life Design process, but now dive deeper into the framework, the categories and the questions. Listen to episode 33 (Life Design - part 1) first, and make sure you have a notebook and a pen to hand (or a laptop with your favourite note taking app). A friend, partner or coach to do this together with and discuss your insights is optional. Enjoy!

Another episode where Bart has no idea in advance what we are talking about. This is becoming a bit of a habit for Pia! We start by addressing this question: What are the most interesting questions you get about our work? What is the elevator pitch of our work? Then we go into this issue: How to deal with people at work that are not as passionate and engaged about work as you are? A lot of what we are getting into here is about personal development, personal growth. So we continue the discussion about this and decide to call this episode “Personal Growth”. We discuss why personal growth is so important to us, the work with our clients, and the world. Then we continue discussing some of the most important ingredients of personal growth, such as personal values, curiosity, presence, experimenting and courage. Towards the end we decide there will need to be a part-2 or even a part-3 to this episode, as this is such a massive subject.

Interesting episode this, if we say so ourselves. We continue a (not recorded) conversation we had at AfrikaBurn three years ago, where we discussed stuckness and the question: How can stuckness become unstuck? Neither of us could remember the answer we had then, unfortunately. But we are having a go at it today. A part of the episode is taken up by Pia coaching Bart on changes in his life, which was very nice (thank you Pia). We (also) discuss: Fear of uncertainty, principle of impermanence, intentional experimenting, the foolishness of clinging, the distinction between moving towards and moving away from, the importance of seeking opportunities for change, the concept of life phases, the importance of solitude (internal time), and the related practices of meditation, reflection, journaling and reading and the believe that it's ok, even desirable, to be uncomfortable and that we can learn from the negative emotions, when going through big changes. Apologies for the bad sound quality on Bart's side.

We are still in the South of Spain (on the last morning before flying out), and we are tackling a topic which somehow has come up quite a lot this week: Ageing. (There are a lot of retired people in this part of Spain). We discuss the differences between chronological, mental and biological age. We talk about the benefits of hanging out with people that are half a generation older and half a generation younger than oneself. We discuss the concept of settling point: The point in one's life when one stops learning, being curious and adventurous. We briefly discuss longevity, lifespan and healthspan. We argue that you are never too old to grow as a human being, whether mentally, emotionally or spiritually.

We are in the South of Spain, on our twice-per-year deep work days to prepare for the second half of the year client work. Quite appropriate then to discuss deep work. The why, what, how and so what of deep work. We discuss why it's important to be deliberate about having rituals and routines around deep work, we define deep work as opposed to shallow work, we discuss how to do it: Plan for it (annually, quarterly, monthly, weekly, daily), how to deal with distractions, the importance of specific time and space, chunking, intentions, agenda building and we give examples of what listeners can do as next steps after listening to this podcast episode.

We are in Stockholm, just after midsummer, when the light is always on. It has been a while since the last recording and we start by discussing what gets in the way of our podcasting: Health, bricks & mortar - very much level-1 stuff. Which then gets us into the topic of this episode: Fears. We remind ourselves of the three lower levels of the Barrett model and how we can use the model to provide a framework for fears. We make the distinction between rational and irrational fears. We discuss the role of the nervous system in fear. What happens when we allow fears to hold us back from our personal development? What is the connection between fear, authenticity, and purpose? How do the body, mind and emotions interact in fear? How can we learn from fear? How can we deal with fear, the thoughts behind the fears and the emotions, the physical sensations in the body? As usual, to illustrate this fascinating topic, we discuss lots of personal examples.

The birth of this episode is quite different. We created it and then put it to rest for a number of months. Then I recently listened to it again when I had one of those rare days of hardly any meetings and lots of time to reflect and create. I suppose I had the space to be open and to follow my curiosity. There was a reason we didn't release the episode at the beginning of the year. You tell us what that reason might be. In the end, the topic Openness is too relevant and important not to engage in and not to have dialogues about. Especially now. If you are familiar with the Big Five personality theory, you also know that Openness is one of the five traits. It indicates how open-minded a person is. High level of openness to experience indicates you enjoy trying new things. You are imaginative, curious, and open-minded. Where do you sit on the scale of openness?

I (Bart) have never felt like I learned so much from recording an episode of our podcast than this one. Nature is something that is very close to Pia's heart and she has a lot more opportunity to be in nature than most people that live in cities. For me it's different, city parks are normally the closest I get to nature. In this dialogue, we touch on the importance of nature to us, human beings, for physical and mental health reasons, personal growth, and even leadership and organisational growth. There is a lot in this episode, we hope you enjoy it as much as we did recording it.

This episode is quite different to what you are used to: Rather than in our normal mega-professional studio environment (just kidding), we find ourselves recording this in a beach restaurant, with lots of background noises. We discuss quality of life. Why is it important? What does it mean to us? For us, health and freedom is important, spontaneity, not too much stress, being able to decide who we spend time with, spending time on what we want to spend time on, choosing experiences we enjoy, really to make our passion our work, and making our home what we want it to be. We discuss the opportunities the pandemic potentially may have given us to enhance our quality of life, potentially without taking away anything else. We discuss that some enhancements may cost some money, and other opportunities to increase our quality of life doesn't have to cost anything. So, quality of life is also related to our relationship with money, and in particular our relationship to spending money. Quality of life is its own important category of Life Design: It is about being aware of what is important to us, and to be more deliberate about how we can make that happen.

Our Christmas present to you, a podcast episode on Life Design. This is a process we use with some of our clients and we discuss in general terms how we go about this ourselves and with others, and the benefits of having a structured approach to reflecting on our lives and setting intentions. A naturally appropriate time to do this is around the end of the year and the start of the new year. What are the highs and lows of 2021, in different categories of our lives, and what could be some intentions, actions or routines we may set for these categories for 2022. We can also do this for a longer period, say 5 years, or shorter periods such as quarters of the year, months or even weeks. We give some tips on how to go about this in the coming few weeks. Enjoy!

It feels a little like we are back in March-2020, when we advised our clients to “hope for the best, prepare for the worst”. Except we didn't know what we meant by “the worst”. Certainly not that we would, almost two years later, be back at what feels like another chapter in the ongoing story of this global pandemic. Today we discuss resilience. How can we train ourselves, our bodies and minds, to be more physically, mentally and emotionally resilient? This, we argue, is a super power that is very useful in a world full of covid-induced setbacks and disappointments.

In this early morning recording of this episode, we talk about sleep. We start from the technology, the biohacking / tracking tools we use, Whoop (Pia) and Oura (Bart), and how we use these tools in optimising sleep. We discuss some of the basics of sleep for example the four main aspects of sleep: Quality, quantity, continuity and regularity and the main stages of sleep: Deep, REM and light sleep. We continue discussing other matters such as the value (and potential risks) of daytime napping, the value of each of the main sleep stages on body and mind repair, and the importance of knowing your chronotype: Are you a lark, a night owl or somewhere in the middle? Do you need an alarm clock to wake up in the morning? Then you are probably not a lark! We talk about the stages of life and how this impacts sleep, for example the sleep of teenagers, parents of very young children and older people. All sleep deprivation in our lives, throughout our lives, has an effect on our health, in particular later in life. How do we deal with this, psychologically and emotionally? What can we do to fine-tune the quality, quantity, regularity and continuity of sleep? We discuss the importance of being aware of the trade-off of certain activities in life and sleep quality and making conscious decisions around this. We discuss some of the tips, hacks and tools we know and use, for example work with changing routines and habits around light, journaling, temperature, nutrition, supplements, exercise, and the timing of daily activities throughout the day.

It has been a while since the last episode, not sure what happened to the time! In this episode, we discuss organisational culture. A good episode to listen to before you listen to this episode is Episode 3, of May 2019, in which we talked about personal values. We define culture as those values and behaviours that are important to a team, group, company or country. What is important to us who work and/or live here? Culture happens anyway, whether you are aware of it or not. We talk about the importance of leadership, and the relation between leadership and culture, and the importance of walking the talk. We also touch on the importance of the company founder(s) in culture, especially when they are still around in executive roles, and for senior leaders to explicitly work with culture. Next is the importance of culture in international expansion, and how for example a European country's corporate culture might meet US corporate culture and how to get the best out of both. We discuss the importance of authenticity and being able to ‘bring your personal values and strengths to work', which means there will be alignments between your personal values and the culture of your company, which will result in being happier and more engaged at work. We talk about the type of work we do with our clients to help them have more meaningful dialogues about culture at work, how we measure culture through culture audits and we briefly discuss the relationship between strategy and culture. Our assertion is that if we as leaders don't work explicitly with culture in organisations, there is a very good chance we will not achieve our strategic objectives and priorities.

Following on from our last episode on coaching, we are discussing a closely related topic, motivation, with one of our clients, Max Barclay. We discuss the importance of motivation in managing and leading people, and what’s important in motivating people. We talk about: Knowing the people you motivate because it’s personal and situational, generational differences, the limited role of reward in motivation, the connection between personal values and motivation, how to use feedback in motivating people, and the importance of motivation in happiness at work. We touch on our favourite book on the subject, Drive by Daniel Pink, and the three drivers of motivation: Autonomy (leave them to it, don’t micromanage), mastery (allow people to get really good at what they are good at already) and purpose (support them to find some meaning bigger than themselves).

It’s the early morning on Good (Long) Friday and we are talking about coaching. What do we talk about when we talk about coaching? Of course, it’s our profession. It’s also a communication or leadership style. And it’s a methodology, a series of behaviours. It’s a personal value, and it’s a way of being in the world. We discuss some of the most essential coaching behaviours: It’s about showing curiosity and openness, being present in the here and now, having empathy with the person you are coaching (which means real interest in the whole person, not just the subject matter), and we discuss some tools such as using silence. We leave listeners with some ideas on what to experiment with the next time they are in a coaching conversation.

Back together in Stockholm after a few months on zoom, we discuss the topic of feedback. Before that even, Pia explains how in her calendar 8 minutes equals one hour, but that aside. Back to feedback, we believe sometimes people think this is a boring topic in leadership development, “oh no not feedback!”, and we also believe that people are not really giving enough feedback in practice. And that it doesn’t have to be difficult, and it can actually be fun. We kick it off by discussing the barriers to giving feedback. Why is it not happening? Then we discuss some other things, here is a selection: Timing of feedback (the earlier the better). The best set and setting for giving feedback. Focus on strengths (getting even better at something) versus fixing weaknesses. Talk from yourself and not others (your feelings, your thoughts, your observations). Feedback is continuous, not an annual event. Be very specific, also about positive feedback eg ask “what was good about it?”. When discussing improvements, coach, don’t tell. Also, ask for feedback on specifics in advance, to make it easier for the giver of feedback.

It’s January 2021, some of us are back in full lockdown, and we are talking about Pia’s most used phone app: Calendar. She addresses some of these questions: Why is this her most used app? Why is planning so important to her? What does planning for spontaneity mean to her? Other questions that we address in this episode: What are some of the neuroscientific and psychological aspects of how we use calendars? How can we be more deliberate about how we use calendars? What is, or should be, the impact of pandemic/working from home on how we use calendars? Some practical aspects of using the calendar we talk about: How to use the calendar for all aspects of your life and work, not just for meetings? How to use the calendar to enhance joy and calm in your life? What can we do in our corporate cultures, systems and team working practices to enhance the most effective use of calendar? How to plan well in advance for space for “no meetings”, solitude and deep work? How to deliberately plan for breaks in between meetings? How to use the calendar so as not to forget things, keep to your routines and stick to your intentions?

We are back online, back on zoom, to record this 2-part podcast on curiosity. We discuss the many aspects of curiosity. Why is it important to be curious? What can we be curious about? How does curiosity work? How does it feel to be curious? How can we invoke curiosity? What stops our curiosity? What is the purpose of curiosity? What is needed for us to be able to be curious? We roughly identify three categories of curiosity: Curiosity into the self, curiosity into others, and curiosity into things. We discuss different ways to develop curiosity and to learn more about curiosity, the relation between curiosity and the personality trait of openness, the importance of curiosity in leadership, how curiosity is an antidote to polarisation and how the inner journey of inquiry can help us get in touch with the essence of our true nature. Our discussion takes us into many examples, ranging from discussions with cardiologists, Rumi poetry, why we practice yoga, what stops puppies from learning, the metaphor of scuba diving, the love for an octopus and the US presidential elections.

We are back online, back on zoom, to record this 2-part podcast on curiosity. We discuss the many aspects of curiosity. Why is it important to be curious? What can we be curious about? How does curiosity work? How does it feel to be curious? How can we invoke curiosity? What stops our curiosity? What is the purpose of curiosity? What is needed for us to be able to be curious? We roughly identify three categories of curiosity: Curiosity into the self, curiosity into others, and curiosity into things. We discuss different ways to develop curiosity and to learn more about curiosity, the relation between curiosity and the personality trait of openness, the importance of curiosity in leadership, how curiosity is an antidote to polarisation and how the inner journey of inquiry can help us get in touch with the essence of our true nature. Our discussion takes us into many examples, ranging from discussions with cardiologists, Rumi poetry, why we practice yoga, what stops puppies from learning, the metaphor of scuba diving, the love for an octopus and the US presidential elections.

We recorded this 2-part podcast in a very special, happy place for us, a tiny village in southern Spain, and we discuss happiness. What are the important elements of happiness for us? We touch on nature, slowness, timelessness, lack of a need to perform, presence, mindfulness, space, absence of self-doubt, the somatic experience of emotions (positive and negative), purpose, personal values, truth, freedom, pleasure, positive relationships, flow states, physical and mental wellbeing, success, attention, lightness, play and the relative joy of carrots. We discuss some formulas for happiness, for example the relationship between happiness and success, or the relationship between happiness and expectations of life. We also discuss some distinctions for example between happiness and pleasure, happiness and desire, and happiness and purpose and we dig a little deeper into the purpose of negative emotions. We discuss some important practical tips, we suggest to try for example meditation, gratitude writing, reflecting on personal values, lowering of expectations (desire what you have, not what you don’t have), internalising goals that you have control over (and don’t try to control things you don’t have control over), reasoning (present the negative feeling with evidence of the opposite), changing our beliefs (accept people do what they can with the resources they have), or practising kindness and compassion.

We recorded this 2-part podcast in a very special, happy place for us, a tiny village in southern Spain, and we discuss happiness. What are the important elements of happiness for us? We touch on nature, slowness, timelessness, lack of a need to perform, presence, mindfulness, space, absence of self-doubt, the somatic experience of emotions (positive and negative), purpose, personal values, truth, freedom, pleasure, positive relationships, flow states, physical and mental wellbeing, success, attention, lightness, play and the relative joy of carrots. We discuss some formulas for happiness, for example the relationship between happiness and success, or the relationship between happiness and expectations of life. We also discuss some distinctions for example between happiness and pleasure, happiness and desire, and happiness and purpose and we dig a little deeper into the purpose of negative emotions. We discuss some important practical tips, we suggest to try for example meditation, gratitude writing, reflecting on personal values, lowering of expectations (desire what you have, not what you don’t have), internalising goals that you have control over (and don’t try to control things you don’t have control over), reasoning (present the negative feeling with evidence of the opposite), changing our beliefs (accept people do what they can with the resources they have), or practising kindness and compassion.

It has been a little while since you have heard from us, we took a break. This episode is a follow-up on an episode we recorded in May 2019: Episode 4, titled Decompression. We suggest you listen to that episode if you didn't already. We go deeper into this topic, and discuss the importance of taking a break from a high intensity life, and also bring it into the context of the current COVID situation. We distinguish between taking a break and taking a holiday, the two are not the same. We discuss the reasons why we should take breaks, different ways of taking a break, for example taking a break from the clock or planning for spontaneity, the different levels of taking breaks, e.g. daily, weekly, monthly, annually, and we give some examples of our own experiences in terms the need for taking breaks and what we do to take breaks. We give some hints and tips on how listeners can take some actions, in particular to reflect on the summer break and decide what it means for the planning of future breaks.

In this episode, the 20th episode to date, we discuss trust. What do we mean by trust, how does it relate to sensemaking and news (and fake news)? We discuss for example how the Swedish COVID situation is reported in international media, and the distinction between truth and truthfulness in journalism. We discuss what makes people trustworthy, and the importance of knowing yourself and authenticity in trustworthiness. We also discuss one other important aspect of trust, which is “not lying” and what we can learn about trust from children and teenagers. We introduce the trust equation (David Maister), and we define the different elements of the equation: the trust equation argues that we should maximise credibility (which comes from experience and subject matter expertise), reliability (quality and timeliness, and managing expectations truthfully) and intimacy (authentic connection, openness and vulnerability), whilst minimising self-orientation (people with low levels of orientation on self and high levels of empathy, curiosity and focus on others are easier to trust and executive coaches are the best dates, trust us!)

We have managed to go one and half year since starting the podcast without personality being the main topic of dialogue, so we thought it was about time. We discuss the importance of personality in how people react to the COVID-19 situation, we briefly touch on the point of neuroticism and how it impact how we react to the crisis, but the main discussion is about introversion versus extraversion, and what this means for how we we lead our lives in a world of lockdowns and physical distancing. Western society is normally geared towards extraverts, and the past few months have been much more kind towards the lifestyles of introverted people. We discuss what this means and our hopes of what will remain in the post-pandemic world. Will society be kinder to introverts? Will the introverted lifestyle be more accepted by extraverts? Will introversion be more valued in leadership? We suggest that listeners take some time to reflect on the past few months, on their personality type and how they can integrate these insights in their post-COVID lives.

In this episode, recorded in the third week of April, we discuss compassion. Continuing the theme of the last episode, we thought it would be appropriate to follow up with a discussion on compassion, perhaps one of the most important values for humanity in these unusual times. We start by discussing distinctions between empathy, sympathy, compassion and kindness. We discuss the importance of self compassion, as well as the need for compassion for others, which also means that we acknowledge that people are in different living, work, and family situations, as well as that each person reacts differently to the general anxiety of these times and to for example the impact of physical distancing. We discuss some practical examples of compassion and acts of kindness, specific to the current times.

In this episode, recorded at Easter, we discuss radical self care. Lots of people are in lockdown, busier than ever trying to do a job, perhaps looking after children and other family members, staying in touch with friends, providing support to people that need it, selflessly being kind to others, and often the very last on their priority list is their own wellbeing. We discuss the concept of radical self care, and why it’s important, particularly now, to ensure a sustainable life. We suggest that you need to move your own wellbeing to the top of your list, and make it a priority, once in a while, to take a break from all your responsibilities, whatever your needs are: Spending time in nature, being in solitude, listening to music, exercising, yoga and meditation, reading, writing, nesting, decluttering, doing whatever feels good or that you know is good for you. It’s important to structure and plan your day/week to be deliberate about care for yourself.

In this episode, recorded in mid March 2020, we discuss working from home. Many people, most people in fact, are housebound because of the COVID-19 situation and we thought it would be good to share some practical tips and hints on working from home. We discuss for example the importance of creating the right space to work in, tidying that space, ensuring it is a quiet space, and perhaps wearing headphones to cancel out noise from outside. We discuss questions such as: What can you do to create some virtual social interactions? What are some of the ground rules you should put in place as a team, as families and in virtual meetings? We talk about the importance of minimising distractions, such as putting the phone on airplane mode, and we discuss the importance of being very deliberate about structuring your workday, including breaks, and what to do during these breaks, e.g. go for a walk.