A podcast where friends discuss the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of the trash bag that is Riverdale. Get ready for our love of Cole Sprouse, our hatred of Veronica's eyebrows, and our obsession with the way Hiram says Mija.
It's 2021, mija!
We recorded this so god damn long ago, mija. We have all changed as people. We've had character development. We've had character regression. I don't even know the people who are speaking in this episode. I wish you could understand. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
He is Risen! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Do you like our new cover photo ;-;-;-;-; --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Do you remember your first time being tickled, mija? Did it change you? Do you think about it? At night?As your partner sleeps beside you, oblivious? Do you crave the sweet sound of laughter? Does the feeling of this want, this craving, haunt your mind? Do you dream of it? Do you? Trigger warnings: sexual assault, murder, cults, p*dophilia, underage sexual content --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
GRANDPAPPY POOP GRANDPAPPY POOP GRANDPAPPY POOP Trigger warnings: transphobia, homophobia, s*xual assault, stalking, physical violence --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Check out this list of local names, mija! Trigger warnings: physical violence, death, kidnapping, su*cide, child abuse, police brutality --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
ITS A GOOD DAY FOR BETTY X DONNA SHIPPERS MIJA!!!!! Trigger warnings: physical violence, su*cide, p*dophilia, filming/watching a sex tape without the consent of the person being filmed (is there a shorter word for this cause I don't know it) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Mija, my co-host cut the best part out of this episode. Shame on him. Shame. Trigger warnings: death, stalking, physical violence, human trafficking --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
I'm not like other girls, mija. I eat raw human flesh in my spare time! Trigger warnings: stalking, human trafficking, grooming, mention of r*pe, incestuous thoughts, p*dophilia --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
What song would you sing to reject Alpha-Wolf-Reggie, mija? Trigger warnings: human trafficking, su*cidal ideation/su*cide, physical violence, pedophilia, sexual assault, filming sexual content without consent --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
BREAKING NEWS! (news jingle plays) The rum bandit has struck again this morning at the Riverdale zoo, where multiple elephants have been found intoxicated. Zoos around the world terrified. More on this story after a word from our sponsors. (ending jingle plays) Trigger warnings: stalking, physical violence, human trafficking --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Cherry Bomb (Riverdale's Version) deserves to be on your Spotify wrapped, mija. Trigger warnings: human trafficking, suicidal ideation, physical violence, sexual assault, pedophilia, self harm, murder --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Have some syrup with that, m(ij)a'am. Trigger warnings: genocide, su*cide, alcoholism, parental abuse, physical violence --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Tessa Leigh Williams, I would gladly kiss you on the mouth. Trigger warnings: r*pe, self harm, su*cide, conversion therapy, cults, organ harvesting, parental abuse, incest --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Mija, I know it sounds like we recorded this episode from underwater. That's because we did. We haven't revealed this to you yet, but one of the podcast hosts actually suffers from fish person disease. If you'd like her to record on dry land next time, we are fundraising to try and pay for her gill surgery. Email endgameriverdalepodcast@gmail.com if you'd like to donate. If you are a fish person, you are not alone. Trigger warnings: alcoholism, cannibalism, su*cide, genocide, physical violence, sexual assault, grooming, recording sex acts without someone's consent --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Did that Hiram scene make you hot and bothered, mija?
Add another secret sibling to the list, mija. Trigger warnings: roofies, p*dophilia, teacher child relationship, child labor, animal abuse, abusive parents --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Does anyone know how to get burnt bits of serial killer out of a carpet, mija? Asking for a friend. Trigger warnings: physical violence, roofies, being buried alive, gangs, child abuse, stalking, gun violence, burning alive --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Do you ever eat turkey and wonder vaguely when your mother will die, mija? Trigger warnings: homophobia, gun violence, death, parental abuse, sexual abuse, alcoholism, bombs, cults, su*cide, torture, mutilation --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
You can contact the national child abuse hotline by texting or calling 1-800-422-4453. If you are a victim of abuse, please contact someone you trust and ask for help. If you know someone being abused, help them access resources available online. If you need more information on how to get help, you can email endgameriverdalepodcast@gmail.com. Trigger warnings: physical violence, child abuse, lobotomies, stalking, taking pictures of unconsenting parties, homophobia, r*pe jokes, racism against Native Americans --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
We miss you Luke Perry. It's pretty sick that you turned into mushrooms ❤️ Trigger warnings: gangs, physical violence, death, car accidents, gun violence, murder --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Welcome to the drunk, COVID infested, nippletastic season three finale, mija! Trigger warnings: drug use, organ harvesting, human trafficking, child marriage, conversion therapy, descriptions of violence --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
This is a plea for help from Genetics 101!! Please save me from my co-hosts, mija! They keep listening to Riverdale songs!! Trigger warnings: child abuse, cults, transphobia (shout out to JKR), mutilation, death, animal cruelty, su*cide, bullying, homophobia, Hiram shirtless --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
How far can Archie's fists take you, mija
Wow. I finally made the episode. And it's not even long. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Donate to Abortion Funds. Links: https://secure.actblue.com/donate/supportabortionfunds?refcode=1milmatch Trigger warnings: guns, cults, child brides, violence --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Mija (Portuguese) Trigger warnings: mention of shootings, cults, child abuse, drug use, su*cide --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
This episode has a special guest, mija!! Welcome to the podcast, Loatmeal!! (She's the best and all of you should email us about how great she is at endgameriverdalepodcast@gmail.com) Trigger warnings: cults, drug use, su*cide, mention of domestic violence, conversion therapy --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Me hoy minoy, mija. Trigger warnings: drugs, violence, abuse --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
R.I.P to Riverdale, mija, ending after 7 seasons
DONATE TO U.S. ABORTION FUNDS! Any amount of money is appreciated!! Go to https://abortionfunds.org/need-abortion/ if you need help or wish to donate. Trigger warnings for this episode: cults, violence --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Would you bottom in a bunker with a bussy full of beans, mija? Trigger warnings: homophobia, outing, slut shaming, conversion therapy, gun violence, drug use, pedophilia, alcoholism --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
They make fun of sex workers in this episode. It's a bad look, mija. Cafe con leche, mija. Trigger warnings: su*cide, gun violence, alcoholism, slut shaming, drugs --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
I'm not like other bear attack victims, I drink root beer and soak with Jeffrey Dahmer
How fuckable are the smurfs, mija? Trigger warnings: bear attacks (??), drug use, abuse/violence, human trafficking, su*cide --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
If I had a nickel for every time someones limb was cut off this season, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but its weird that it happened twice. Trigger warnings: drug use, medical abuse, torture, conversion therapy --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
We looked up farm porn for this episode, mija. Trigger warnings: Archie being horny, drug use, violence/death, corporal punishment, conversion therapy, medical abuse, force feeding (???) --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
How many things can you shove up your vag, mija? Trigger warnings: miscarriage, su*cide, child abuse, death/violence, kidnapping --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
We're here to let you know that Archie Andrews is canonically average at sex, mija. We were surprised, too. Trigger warnings: police violence, torture, child abuse, assault, su*cide --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Listen, mija. We know apartheid was bad. The joke is that the Riverdale writers think that's a hot take. It's fucking not. Anyway this bio doesn't make sense unless you listen, mija. Trigger warnings: racism, abuse, incest, child marriage, drug use, death/violence --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Is it cheating if you have to go to a sex bunker to become worthy of the King's Scripture, mija? Trigger warnings: su*cide, drugs, violence --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
This podcast does not support J*hn M*laney, mija. But we do use his jokes. Trigger warning: su*cide, drug use, gang violence, assault --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
We're really not good at doing this podcast, mija. If you saw the other bio, no you didn't. Trigger warnings: su*cide, abuse, drug use, conversion therapy/homophobia --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Does your peepee have a hat, mija? Let us know! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Pop your pussies for the gang war, mija
Chapter 32? Never heard of her, mija. Also, this episode sucks. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
I swear to god this episode is actually edited. Over 40 minutes of stuff was cut I swear. I promise, mija. I tried. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Does the sound of Hiram saying "good boy" make you melt, mija? Can you feel his hot daddy breath on your neck, mija? Are you... ready..mija? (Trigger warning: homophobia, conversion therapy) --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Boobs are sweaty/ knees weak/ arms are heavy/ there's vomit on his sweater already/ mom's spaghetti --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message
Do you want some nuts to top off that shake, mija? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/endgameriverdalepodcast/message