Podcasts about spank

This week on our true crime/dark history podcast things get extra spooky. Tayler shares the ghostly story of the Poltergeist known as The Blank Monk and how it terrorized a young British girl. Christine tells the story of the Greenbriar Ghost The woman who came back from the grave in her mothers dreams to solve her own murder. Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Judd and AJ talk about the Wild's win over Toronto that saw their two healthy superstars drive the play, a resurgence of Vladimir Tarasenko, and the long awaited coming out party for Marcus Foligno who tallied his first career hat trick!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Child Discipline ~ To spank or spoil; a new perspective on parenting - a short interview with parenting coach Cornelia Lockitch. Listen to caller's personal dramas four times each week as Dr. Kenner takes your calls and questions on parenting, romance, love, family, marriage, divorce, hobbies, career, mental health - any personal issue! Call anytime, toll free 877-Dr-Kenner. Visit www.drkenner.com for more information about the show (where you can also download free chapter one of her serious relationships guidebook).

This week Christine covers the legendary and very turbulent  life of the Prince of Darkness himself Ozzy Osbourne. Tayler talks about another legend this one of the mob variety. How Whitey Bulger played both sides of the law and was o the run for nearly 2 decades.Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Totally unfiltered and slightly inappropriate talk with Rylie.

The Underground Lounge: After Hours returns with another unfiltered, unpredictable late-night conversation featuring Lou, Spank, and Holly, and this one goes everywhere.The episode kicks off with classic After Hours chaos as the crew catches up, jokes about creative process, procrastination, and what it really takes to get in the right mindset to create. From there, things quickly spiral into a hilarious debate about personal style, comfort versus fashion, and whether a real outfit can be put together on a strict budget. Holly throws out the idea of putting the guys to the test with a shopping challenge, while Lou and Spank defend their long-standing commitment to sweatpants, hoodies, and staying true to who they are, even if that means wearing the same look for the next ten years.As the conversation continues, they dive into how people shop, why some stores get unfair reputations, and what it actually means to “get fly” without trying too hard. The back-and-forth turns into a deeper discussion about identity, confidence, and why comfort often wins over trends.Later in the episode, the vibe shifts into tech, privacy, and content creation as the crew talks about Meta glasses, recording in public, and the blurred lines between documenting life and living it. From funny personal stories to unexpected scenarios, the conversation highlights just how strange content creation has become in the social media era.The night takes an even deeper turn when the group reacts to a recent documentary that sparks an honest discussion about accountability, loyalty, public perception, and how opinions can change when new information comes to light. Each perspective brings a different lens to the conversation, from emotional detachment to cultural impact, resulting in a raw and thoughtful exchange that feels as real as it gets.Funny, messy, thoughtful, and completely unscripted, this episode is a perfect example of why After Hours exists, real conversations, no filters, and no rush to wrap things up neatly.

In the last episode of he year Tayler serves up a 2025 wrapped of the dumbest criminals of the year. Christine tells the classic story of an unstable young lady falling head over heels into obsession with a mormon missionary. The story ripped from the British 70's tabloids the "manacled Mormon"Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

In this holiday episode Christine covers stories of Florida Man ruining Christmas with sheer power of stupidity and Tayler tells us the story of the legendary Krampuslauf the half demon, half goat creature that will beat you senseless for no reason during a holiday parade. Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

In this episode of the Flatlander Kennels Podcast, Chris and Elliott sit down with Mike Marino of Marino Decoys to talk about hand carved cork decoys and the Marino experience. Mike shares how one disappointing box of plastic decoys pushed him to pick up a block of wood and carve his first goldeneye, and how that quickly grew into award winning gunning decoys that look and move like real birds on the water.They dig deep into his custom dog urn decoys and tell the story of Spank, the grand hunting dog whose ashes now ride inside a huntable decoy built from shotgun shells that were actually fired over him. From lighter January mallards for timber hunts to rigs built for the method stage hunter who cares more about the experience than the pile, this one is all about honoring dogs, elevating the hunt, and creating heirlooms you can pass down to your kids.Mammoth Guardian Dog Cratehttps://www.mammothpet.com/Guardian15 for 15% offMarino Decoys and Urnswww.marinodecoys.com

This week on The Underground Lounge, Lou and Spank sit down with the legendary Deon Cole for a conversation that's equal parts hilarious, insightful, and absolutely unpredictable. From the moment he steps into the Lounge, Deon brings that unmistakable Chicago energy and a lifetime of stories from the road, including his early days grinding in the Chicago comedy scene, rocking Timbs on stages that demanded suits, and literally changing the culture just by showing up as himself.Deon opens up about discovering stand-up almost by accident, the moment he realized comedy was his purpose, and the unforgettable Def Jam tour experience that pushed him to level up his writing and craft. He breaks down how embracing silence became his comedic superpower, the origins of his iconic notebook on stage, and why he sometimes enjoys bombing on purpose just to keep audiences honest.Lou and Spank dig into Deon's wild journey from the clubs to becoming one of the most respected writers in the game, from helping craft Ricky Smiley's classic prank call CDs, to joining Comic View, to eventually making history as the first Black writer on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Deon shares behind-the-scenes stories from the writers' room, how one unexpected bit turned into Emmy nominations, and the moment he almost quit the show before everything changed overnight.The conversation goes even deeper as Deon talks about landing Angie Tribeca, becoming “Charlie” on Black-ish (a role originally written for Charlie Murphy), and navigating Hollywood in a way that's stayed authentic to who he is. Along the way, the guys swap stories about clubs, cities, strip lounges, and why Chicago produces some of the funniest comedians in the world.This episode is packed with gems for comedy fans, creators, and anyone who appreciates a raw, unfiltered look at the grind behind the glow-up. Deon's honesty, humor, and perspective shine from start to finish, making this one of the most entertaining and inspiring sit-downs ever in the Underground Lounge.Tune in now and enjoy the ride.

A look back at the first 6 episodes of the podcast. I tried to make the audio a little better than it was way back then, and although I think the attempt was semi-successful, I'm not a miracle worker. I hope you enjoy the flashback.

Happy Thanksgiving friends! Please enjoy this episode all about goofy Thanksgiving themed crimes and lesser known but fascinating and horrible facts about the sinking of the Titanic. Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Spank my ass, mommy!#Anime #Action #Comedy #Ecchi #FightingSpecial thanks to these awesome artists for letting us use their music:Intro by ckotty3 -⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://pixabay.com/users/ckotty3-25960960/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Outro by Playsound - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://pixabay.com/users/playsound-24686998/⁠

Have you ever reached a point where the answers you’re given simply stop feeling right? Where you realize that trusting your own instincts might be the only way forward. For Piper, that moment came in a doctor’s office when she was told her son just needed a spanking. Something inside her knew that wasn’t true. What followed was a full transformation born from love and determination. She went back to school, relearned what she thought she knew about health, and built a life that would help not only her son but hundreds of other families too. Along the way, she found her own healing in the process. This conversation is about listening to that quiet voice inside you. It’s about the courage to question what you’ve been told and the hope that grows when you refuse to give up. Take your time with this one. It is gentle and full of heart. What You’ll Hear A mother’s turning point after harmful medical advice How childhood trauma shaped a life built on self-reliance Discovering purpose in the middle of fear and uncertainty The surprising ways healing her son led to her own transformation The strength found in trusting intuition over authority How sharing one story can light the way for others Guest Bio Dr. Piper Gibson founded the Tic Disorder Institute: Regenerating Health and Elite Gene Labs, where she empowers families and healthcare professionals to address tic disorders and optimize wellness. She is a Doctor of Functional Medicine, Advanced Holistic Nutrition, and a Board-Certified Doctor of Natural Medicine. She is also the author of Tic Talk: Common Misconceptions, Natural Approaches, and Real Conversations about Tic Disorders. Connect with Piper: Website: https://regenerating.health/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/regeneratinghealth/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RegeneratingHealth Subscribe for new episodes, early access, and ad-free listening at www.patreon.com/thelifeshiftpodcast. Join the newsletter and community at www.thelifeshiftpodcast.com/follow.

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In this weeks episode the girls cover the story of the small town in Illinois in the 1940's that had a crime wave committed by the Mad Gasser of Matoon! Was it a mad scientist intent on hurting people? Or a case of mass hysteria? We also cover the high key terrifying story of an entire extended family in Mexico massacred by the cartel on thanksgiving to silence a single possible snitch. Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

In this episode of the Underground Lounge, Lou and Spank sit down with comedy legend Alex Thomas for a conversation that feels like a masterclass in culture, comedy, and survival. Alex takes the guys back to his childhood in South Central Los Angeles, where he was bused 40 minutes each day to become the first Black student at an elite Beverly Hills private school, an experience that shaped both his identity and his sense of humor.He talks about being raised by two supportive parents who kept him too busy for the streets, the reality of growing up surrounded by violence, and how staying active in sports, music, and after-school programs helped him avoid the fate of so many childhood friends. The conversation shifts into his early dance career, including how he became a breakout talent on Soul Train, his relationship with Rosie Perez, and the pivotal moment when the Wayans family encouraged him to try stand-up.Alex breaks down the unbelievable week where he bombed a major dance audition, got rained on with $60,000 in cash by Damon Wayans, booked his first-ever Hollywood audition, and accidentally landed one of the most iconic McDonald's commercials of the '90s.The episode goes even deeper when Alex talks about eventually writing for The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, how Will Smith discovered him on stage at the Laugh Factory, and what it was like to be the only non-Philly member of a creative team that turned into a brotherhood.Throughout the conversation, the guys touch on parenthood, the differences between public and private school, keeping kids safe in today's world, and what it means to break generational cycles. Packed with laughs, real-life gems, hip-hop history, comedy stories, and authentic Underground Lounge energy, this episode is a must-watch for anyone who loves a good origin story rooted in hustle, culture, and heart.

Mrs. Bateman's Cougar Club: Part 2 The Women of '77 Changed My Life. Based on a post by Sel Wync Dog. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Discrete Services. "Wait; Mrs. Bateman; she paid to have sex with me?" "Yes, Todd." "I don't believe it; She's beautiful, I'd have fucked her for free! Any guy would!" "True, but she's married and discretion is of vital importance. That is half of what she's paying for. A great fuck is the other half. And she said it was worth every penny. In fact she wants to come back next Friday, same time." As I stood there trying to come to grips with this revelation, Mrs. Bateman knelt on the bed, her face pressed into the wet sheets. She inhaled the scent and moaned. I glanced over and saw far enough under her skirt to see she was wearing thigh high stockings rather than pantyhose. I stepped closer and lifted her skirt. She was panty-less. I touched her pussy and found she was very wet. Management Appreciation. "God, Mrs. Bateman, your pussy is soaking wet! Would you like me to fuck it?" I said playfully. "Would you, Todd? That would be so nice." I fucked her from behind as she cooed encouragement. "Oh, that's so good Todd. You have such a big cock. You really are such a nice boy. Yes, just like that. Fuck me, Todd, fuck me good. Oh yes." Despite the vigorous sex with Diane, I had no trouble getting stiff for my mentor, which is what I realized she was. And I was thoroughly enjoying fucking her. Holding her hips and thrusting into her was nice and I could watch my cock sliding in and out. I could see her pussy stretching to accept my cock and when I pulled back, it was covered in her wetness. "Spank me, Todd." "What?" "Spank me!" she said more forcefully. "Spank my ass with your palm." I did and she swore. "Harder!" I smacked her and she yelped. "Yes! That's it! Again! Yes! Not too hard and not too often, okay? You start with a small, light smack and wait to see if she likes it. God, you feel good. Okay, slow it down a bit. That's it, that's it; Yes; Now, I want you to pull out and then press it in slowly. Oh yes, just like that. No, don't shove it in, just ease the tip in; and out; and in...Oh yes, that good. Keep that up for a bit." This felt incredible! The sensation of repeated penetration was amazing but the stimulation was going to make me cum. "I'm going to cum, Mrs. Bateman!" She turned and faced me, grabbing my cock and thrusting it into her mouth and her hands stroked and caressed me. I shot my load into her mouth as she locked her eyes with mine. It was wild, cumming as I stared into her eyes. This time when she'd drained me, she leaned back a bit lifting and cradling her tits. She opened her mouth. Cum flowed over her lips, down her chin, and dripped onto her tits. As I watched she played with it. She ran her fingers through it and then rubbed it into her skin like lotion. And she was smiling wickedly the whole time. We showered, put on robes, and had dinner. Later I changed and went home to await Mom's nightly check-in. After that, I returned to Mrs. Bateman's and we slept in her bed. No sex, just cuddling, kissing, and talking. And it was wonderful. The next morning I awoke with my typical morning woodie and my first thought was to try and fuck the woman sleeping next to me. However she had other ideas and gave me my first titty-fuck. She sucked my cock a bit, licked it up and down, then wrapped her titties around it and stroked. It was fun. Then she laid down and I straddled her, placing my cock between her tits which she then pressed together. As I thrust back and forth she giggled and encouraged me. In a few minutes I came. She grasped my cock, closed her eyes, and directed my spurts of cum to completely cover her face. She then rubbed it around and even licked and swallowed some. She forced her eyes open and stumbled to the dresser mirror. Looking at her image she laughed. "God, that's a lot of cum!" she giggled. "It's weird I know, but I love it so!" She washed her face and shooed me off. A little later as we ate breakfast she said, "You and I are not fucking today. You need to rest up for this evening." "Why?" Sue's Asian Erotics. "You have another client coming over." "Oh?" I said, my eyebrows raising. That afternoon I went to service the Caddy and when I returned there was another car there. I went in, they were again sitting in the living room. "Good! You're here, come on in," she gestured at the other woman, "This is Sue." I noticed she did not elaborate, no last name given. "Sue, this is Todd." Sue looked at me and smiled, "Hello Todd." I smiled, "Hello." Sue was Japanese and it was difficult to guess her age but she had to be in her late thirties or early forties. She was pretty and wore her black hair long and gathered in the back. She had a nice smile and her dark eyes were obviously sizing me up. It felt awkward. Finally she stood and approached me. I stood still as she circled me, one hand gently gliding across my chest, then my back. Sue was probably 5'3". She had a rather petite figure but possessed an air of sophistication and authority. She was wearing a dark blue dress. "Yes, I believe he'll do." she said, then paused and looked at me again. "He understands what; is required? This is all discrete of course;" "Of course," Mrs. Bateman replied and fixed me with an icy stare. "He has far too much to lose." Sue nodded and headed for the stairs. Mrs. Bateman put her arm around me and kissed my neck. "Okay Todd, this is going to be a little different. Sue has fantasies. Many women do. Her's is being taken. Not raped, but you must use a little force to overcome her reluctance. Nothing brutal or violent. She will resist a little and you press on, ignoring it. But if she says 'No' or 'Stop', by god you'd better stop immediately. Do you understand?" "Yeah, I think so. She wants to pretend to resist but really wants it." "Yes." Nervously I went upstairs and knocked on the guest room door. It opened and I stepped in. Sue closed the door behind me and I heard it lock. She had removed the dress and draped it across the chair. Now she wore a small silky white camisole and panties (I would later learn they were called tap panties and resembled running shorts). She said nothing but walked slowly around and climbed onto the bed. Nervously, I began to strip. It wasn't until I was naked and turned to face that she spoke. "Olivia was right! You are big!" she said as she reached out to grasp my swelling cock. I moaned as she squeezed and tugged gently. She rose onto her knees and we kissed. She moved her head from side to side and her kisses grew more intense. I slipped my hands under her camisole but she pushed them away. "Not yet!" "Okay, no rush." I said and she backed away. "You know what to do? What I want?" "Yes, Mrs. Bateman explained." She closed her eyes and was quiet for a moment. Then she took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay, begin." I rose from the bed and walked towards her. Sue turned and faced the wall. I reached out and gripped her shoulders, she flinched and said something in Japanese. I pulled her to me and she resisted. I wrapped my arms about her and kissed her neck. Sue repeated the word, it sounded like 'bango', but short and harsh. I began to slide my hands down and around her waist, she kept her arms clenched tightly over her chest. I kissed the other side of her neck and my kisses slowly climbed up into her hair, behind her ear. I whispered. "I want you; you are so beautiful; give yourself to me, please;" Sue muttered something I couldn't understand. I slid my hands around, onto her belly, my left moved up, under her camisole until her arms stopped me just below her breasts. My right then slid down into her panties. She said something like "Shinaide kudasai;" and tried to pull away. I leaned into her and pressed her against the wall. My hand had reached her mound and I felt her fur. Sue dropped one hand to grasp my wrist. My left hand slid up until it cupped her right breast. It was small but firm and she gasped. I pushed further with my right hand and my fingers found and explored her folds. She whimpered and mumbled words I couldn't make out. I continued to kiss her neck and ear. I continued to gently rub her pussy but didn't try to penetrate her for another minute or two. Slipping my hands free I grasped her shoulders and spun her around. I held her head in both hands and kissed her. She resisted, but only after a moment, turning her head. I then kissed that side of her face, her neck and shoulder. Her chin rose as she mumbled something at the ceiling. I kissed her exposed throat and she seemed to tremble a little. I kissed further down her throat to her chest, as far as the camisole . My hand sliding down to her waist, over her hips and onto her thighs.     Then, very slowly, my kisses rose upwards to her throat and mouth. This time when I kissed her lips she didn't resist. She didn't participate in the kiss, she merely allowed it. My hands, as they rose from her hips slid under her camisole and it lifted. She tried to back away but was against the wall. As my hands reached her armpits I lifted her arms over her head, the camisole following, her breasts exposed as the silk covered her face. Sue was petite and her breasts were small but firm. Her nipples seemed abnormally large in comparison and were stiff and erect in the center of small, dark red areola. I lowered my head and covered them in kisses. Sue continued to mutter in Japanese as I held her arms up. My kisses then roamed higher, up her throat. I kissed her mouth again, shielded by the silk. This time she hesitated then participated in the kiss, her lips moving with mine. I began to slide my hands higher carrying the camisole over her head ever so slowly. I stopped with the silk covering her eyes but our lips met. The kiss was longer and deeper and ever so slowly she seemed to yield more and more. I now had a raging hard on and wanted her badly. I lifted the camisole higher and she pulled her arms free, immediately covering her breasts. I scooped her up and spun, dropping her on the bed. Before she could react, I grabbed her panties and pulled them down and off. She clamped her legs together with one hand over her pussy, the other arm over her breasts. Sue was pleading in Japanese as I grasped her knees and forced her legs open. I peeled her hand away and kissed her dark furred mound, then nuzzled my way down to her wet folds. And Sue was wet. Very wet. As my tongue worked its way in between her lips to lap her juices, Sue moaned loudly. I forced myself to slow down and remember my lessons. I focused on exploring her pussy, ignoring her clitoris. I licked her slit from bottom to top and teased her by trying to thrust my tongue into her. Sue had one hand on my head as if to push me away, though she didn't try very hard. She continued to mutter and mumble and even squeeze with her legs as I caressed her thighs and hips. Finally she ceased altogether as I brought her clitoris into play. Her moans grew louder and her hips started rocking. I waited until she seemed really close and then started sucking on her clit, and flicking it rapidly with the tip of my tongue. Sue started babbling and pawing at my head with both hands. Then her legs began to tremble and quiver, she thrust her hips upwards and cried out. "Hai! Hai! Hai! Ah!" She tensed up, her body rigid yet her muscles trembling, then collapsed. Seizing the opportunity I grabbed my cock and pressed the tip between her lips. Sue's eyes flew open. "Dame, dame, dame!" she begged. I thrust into her and we both cried out. Damn she was tight. Soaking wet but tight. I pulled back and thrust again. Again Sue cried out, I pulled back and thrust again and again and again as she cried and squeezed her breasts. As I thrust faster and faster she panted, the first words in English since we started. "Too much! Oh god! Too much, too much! Oh god!" I was afraid she was about to stop me but she didn't. Instead she grasped my right hand and placed it on her throat. I didn't expect this and, confused, I slowed down. Sure reached up and grabbed me by the throat with both hands. "Fuck me!" she whispered then uttered a stream of harsh sounding Japanese. Okay, well if this is what she wants; I thrust harder and faster and her grip weakened and then failed. I forcibly kissed her without any reaction from her. I was pounding her pussy and she was wailing and crying. She didn't say anything but suddenly I felt her body stiffen and her pussy spasmed around my cock. It was like a fist was squeezing it. I exploded, my cum spurting out and filling her. After what seemed ages, she went limp. I sat up and as I pulled out, a flood of cum flowed out and down. I watched it for a moment then lay down next to her. After a few minutes she stirred. Her hands explored her body, down to her pussy. She rolled to face me. Scooting close she whispered in my ear. "That was incredible; But I have one more favor to ask." "What's that?" "To conclude my fantasy, I need you to bathe with me." Okay... The guest bedroom we were using had its own full bath which included a big tub. Sue and I bathed together and even fucked again, albeit nice and slow. She dressed and then paused at the door. Turning she cupped my face in her hand. "This; was very important to me. I cannot explain why. Just know you have pleased me. Greatly. I will not be back; but I am happy to have had this; affair. Goodbye Todd." She handed me a thick envelope and left. I waited a minute and then dressed and went downstairs. Mrs. Bateman was sitting at the kitchen table. "She said you were perfect. She said she was happy, satisfied and sore." "What was all that about?" I asked. "I believe she was exorcising a demon from her past." Mrs. Bateman replied. "Something she wanted to revisit." "Well it sure was different." "Tell me everything, Todd, and while you do I'll fix you some dinner." Later I dashed home for Mom's 9PM call and then went back to Mrs. Bateman's. We slept together but didn't fuck. She did end up giving me a great blow job before I fell asleep. Mammary Mary. The next couple of days were spent working on her rent house for a few hours and then after dinner, fucking. She showed me new positions and taught me different techniques. We also worked on my foreplay and oral skills. My next client came on Wednesday. I was introduced to an older woman named Mary. She looked me over and, nodding, handed an envelope to Mrs. Bateman. Instead of preceding me up to the room, she took me by the hand and led me upstairs. Mary was older than anyone I had considered having sex with. She was easily fifty or fifty five. But when she dropped her dress I saw only a very sexy woman. Mary stood 5'7" in her high heels, had dark brown hair and brown eyes and an amazing figure. She stood there facing me in black stockings, panties, garter belt and bra. As she strutted across the room to me her eyes never left mine. I felt like she was stalking me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me. The first kiss was about five or six seconds, the second was much longer and open mouthed. Then came tongue, but not closed mouthed French kissing. Rather it was open mouthed, her tongue teasing and enticing, dancing just out of reach. She laughed and reached down to rub my crotch. Grabbing my belt she pulled me to the bed. Mary sat and unfastened my belt and jeans then tugged them down, along with my underwear. She toyed with my swelling cock, looked up at me and smiled. She paused to remove her bra. Her tits were probably D cups but sagged, her nipples pointing downward more. Her areola were so pale they were almost invisible but her nipples were nice and long. She still said nothing at all but started stroking my cock. She had magic hands. I'd never felt anyone milk my cock like she was. Mary had a technique that was incredible and in no time I was ready to cum. I warned her that I was close, but she just smiled. "Come on then! Give it to me! Give it to me!" I grunted and came, spurting rope after rope of cum onto her chest and tits. Mary continued to milk my cock until the last drop was deposited on her skin. She stood up and stepped over to the mirror on the dresser. She stood there, admiring her image and smiling for a moment then did something totally surprising. She reached into her bag and pulled out a camera. I recognized it as a Rolleiflex. "Do you know what this is?" she asked. "Yes, my Dad has one." "Do you know how to use it?" "Sure;" "Good," she handed it to me. "Take a few pictures of my spunk covered titties." I opened the camera, took a couple, then suggested she lie on the bed and adjusted the lamp to a better angle and took a few more. She then began to run her fingers through the cum, and told me to take more pictures as she played with it. Finally she pulled her panties off and had me take a couple of photos of her pussy. Now her pussy was crowned with short, dark hair but her pussy itself was almost bare, covered only by a little fuzz and her lips were long and dark. I took a few photos and tried to get really close, but the camera wouldn't focus really close. She sat up and took the camera and placed it back in her bag. She turned and pointed to the bed. I laid down and she squatted and sat on my face, gripping the headboard. I tasted her, she wasn't as sweet as Diane but okay. I went to work and as I did she proceeded to hum. Soon she was rocking her hips a bit, then more and more. She was at last producing a fair quantity of fluids and paused to finger herself.     Satisfied, she scooted down until she was over my cock, grasped it and inserted it. She short-stroked a few times until everything was good and wet and then started taking it all the way in long, slow strokes. She seemed to really like it slow and, well, what the heck? It was sex after all. So what if she was older with weird habits and tastes? I relaxed and savored the feeling of her slow ride as I caressed and squeezed her tits. "You have such a nice cock, Todd," she said and sighed as she took it all. "So nice. You like my titties? Everyone does. Go ahead and suck on them, suck hard, I don't mind. In fact I want you to suck on them till it hurts. Yes; now the other one; oh; yes; Would it shock you to know that I like it rough? That I like a little pain?" As I sucked on her tit I spanked her. Mary yelped then grinned. "Yes, please!" "Harder;" Smack. "Harder!" Whack! "Yes!" Whack! "More! Please!" Whack! Acting on impulse I grabbed her hips and rocked her forward onto her knees. With her weight off of me I started driving my cock in and out of her faster and faster. Mary's voice rose an octave or two. "Ah!" As I fucked her, my hands were squeezing her ass and I felt her puckered asshole beneath my middle finger. I pushed on it. "Oh My God! Yes! Yes! Do It!" she cried out. I pushed harder and the tip of my finger penetrated her to my first knuckle. "Oh! Oh god, oh god, oh god;" she moaned. "Spank me! Bite me! Fuck me!" I sucked as much of her tit into my mouth as possible and bit down, albeit lightly, just enough for her to feel my teeth, as I spanked her with my left hand. She yelped and jerked and my finger slid in up to the second knuckle. I could feel my dick sliding in and out I pressed down towards it. ""Oh God! Gah!" she screamed and climaxed. Her body shook and tears filled her eyes. Soon she collapsed on top of me and sobbed. A few minutes passed and she regained her composure. My cock had slipped from her and slowly she rolled off and lay next to me. I rose on one elbow and brushed the hair from her face. "Are you okay?" I asked. Her mascara was streaked and her eyes were red. She sniffed and smiled. "Yes." She sighed and then took a deep breath. "I suppose I owe you an explanation;" "No. Not at all." I answered. "I want to please you and that means doing whatever you want." Mary stared at me as if I had grown horns or turned blue. She blinked a few times and shook her head. "I don't believe it. I-I thought you wanted to fuck and cum like all young guys. No one has ever been focused on me, on my wants. That's why I decided to hire a lover. But I still expected you to want to finish;" "Oh, I do. If you want to, that is. But if you get dressed and leave right now, that's okay too. I won't starve for sex." Mary smiled and touched my cock. "No, I don't suppose you would." She snuggled in close and was quiet for a minute. "Todd, if you're really telling the truth about pleasing me; Well, there is something I want to do." "Okay; What is it?" Mary got up and rummaged in her bag. She came back to the bed with her camera and a bottle of lube. "I want you to take a photo of my pussy with your cock in it." "Um; okay." "I have my own darkroom and develop all my photos myself. These photos allow me to uh; pleasure myself when I'm without a lover." Mary laid down and I played with her pussy. She encouraged me to use some lube and it did help. Then after fucking her for a minute or two, I sat up and took the photos as she'd instructed. A few with my cock all the way in, a few with it barely in, and a few with it out, just touching her lips. Mary took the camera and set it aside. She caressed and squeezed her breasts, smiling at me. "Okay, dear boy, you've been so patient and understanding. I owe you a good time. I want you to fuck me, any way you want, just as long as you cum. I want to feel you cum deep inside me, filling me with your hot spunk!" I grinned and leaned forward and picked up speed. Mary was kissing me and encouraging me. "Oh that's so good! Yes! Oh god, what a good fuck! Go on Todd, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me!" I kissed her then whispered in her ear, "Do you like it? Is it good?" "Yes!" she responded. "Are you going to climax again?" "I; I don't know;" "I want you to climax again. I want to feel you climax as I fuck you." She was quiet for a moment. "Mary, you said everyone loves your titties;" "Yes!" "Do you?" "Yes!" "Show me. Suck on them!" I rose up as she gathered her titties and began to suck on first one and then the other. I grabbed her ankles and held them up as I thrust in and out. I watched her suck and squeeze them and felt myself getting close. I drove my cock in deep and hard and held it as I came. Confined as it was, my cock struggled to spurt forth its load. With the thrust and first spurt Mary gasped. "Oh god! I'm cumming!" We stared into each other's eyes as we climaxed. It was amazing. When I'd finished and got up, Mary lay there for a minute. When she finally sat up she was smiling. "That was great, Todd." she touched my cheek gently. "You are really an amazing young man and a great lover." She stood and walked into the bathroom. "Can I see you again?" she asked, turning to face me. I looked her over. "Maybe;" I said grinning. "Answer a few questions first." Mary stepped into the bedroom and stood facing me. "Okay." "How old are you?" "Fifty-six." "What is your bra size?" "Thirty-six double D." "Did you really like it when I fingered your ass?" "Yes, absolutely. It was wild, out of bounds, scary and exciting all at once." "Mrs. Bateman says that some women like to have anal sex, especially when on their monthly; Have you tried it?" Mary bit her lip. "No; but I've thought about it." "You want to try?" "Now?" "Sure! Why not?" Mary bit her lip and shook her head. "No; I don't think I could take it. Maybe someday, but not right now." "Okay, fair enough. One last question." "Really? Oh, okay." "What do you want to do next time?" "Oh! You!" she exclaimed and threw herself on me. Mary held me down and smothered me with kisses and smashed her big titties in my face. Then she got up and went into the bathroom. I really, really needed to pee and decided to slip on my clothes and go to the master bedroom and bath. When I'd finished, Mary had gone. Mrs. Bateman handed me the envelope. I tore it open. Two hundred and fifty dollars. Holy cow! "She said you were incredible. She wants to come back in two weeks and said you'd earned a tip." Mrs. Bateman handed me another one-hundred dollar bill and kissed me. "I am proud of you Todd. You are becoming a great lover for one so new at it all. Now, I'll bet you have worked up an appetite. Come to the kitchen and tell me all about it while I fix you a steak." Sadly though, my parents returned from their vacation and although I was able to find ways to meet my clients, it became very awkward at home. Dad was clueless but I think Mom suspected something was going on. But by the end of that summer I had been able to make love to seven different women, five of them multiple times. I reluctantly packed my bags and went off to college. I settled into the dorm life and tried to focus on adjusting to this new life and new challenges. Classes were not as bad as I'd feared and the only real issue was my roommate. I just didn't like having a roommate at all. Due to my wild summer, I didn't feel the need to chase girls, and that allowed me to relax. For a while. One evening in early December, as I was walking from the Library to my dorm, I saw a brown '73 Caddie, Coupe de Ville idling in the parking lot. As I neared, the door opened and Mrs. Bateman got out. I met her and she hugged and kissed me. "What are you doing here?" I asked. "Well two things, first my bed is empty and my pussy is lonely. I want you, Todd. I want you to fuck me all night long; and leave me exhausted, and sore." "I would love that, but I can't take you into my dorm;" "That's why I rented a hotel room." she replied. "Okay, let's go!" I said eagerly. We got in her car; and as she drove, I asked, "What was the second reason for your coming out here?" Mrs. Bateman grinned. "Well, I am trading my home for a nice big house out here. I haven't moved yet, but when I do, I was wondering if you would like to set up a room there?" I smiled. "Well, I might set up a room to entertain guests, but I'd rather spend most of my time in the Master Bedroom." Mrs. Bateman grinned evilly at me. "I was hoping you'd say that. I'd also like for you to call me Olivia." Based on a post by Sel Wync Dog, for Literotica

You can enjoy exclusive and intense erotic audio by grabbing your copy of the Sensual Awakening App on the Apple Store,or downloading the very unofficial and unapproved Android version from WyldeInBed.comTurning 40 never felt so… dangerously sexy. At her milestone birthday party, Jane expected balloons, champagne, and awkward small talk with distant relatives. What she didn't expect was him—an old flame from her wild high school days, reappearing like a forbidden spark she thought had gone out forever.As the night unfolds, nostalgia gives way to temptation, and their playful banter ignites into something far more heated.Seduction, laughter, and bold desires take center stage as the pair dives headfirst into a thrilling, no-holds-barred adventure of bondage, spanking, and passion that refuses to be tamed.Get ready for a story dripping with tension, intimacy, and the tantalizing thrill of rediscovery. This isn't just a birthday—it's a night Jane will never forget.

This week the gals cover some food for thought. From unhinged eating contests to dangerously spicy food challenges, we're diving into the questionable life choices people make for bragging rights, and why we can't stop watching. Then we shift gears to the queen of chaotic confidence herself: Alice Roosevelt, the White House wild child who lived louder, bolder, and far spicier than any ghost pepper. Grab some water. You're absolutely going to need it.Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

On this episode of The Sick Podcast, Maxim Lapierre, Pierre McGuire and Brian Wilde join Tony Marinaro to break down the Montreal Canadiens' 5-1 loss to the Los Angeles Kings, the disappointing effort level from the home team, Montreal's struggles against bigger teams, Samuel Montembeault still not inspiring confidence, what the Habs can learn from this loss, possible lineup changes ahead of Thursday's matchup against the Dallas Stars and much more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Christian College Sex Comedy: Part 28 Sandwiches? In 30 parts, By FinalStand. Listen to the podcast at Explicit Novels.             Some masks hide who we are. Others show who we want to be                I could bowl Mercy over with a feather. Rio and I are doing the same social mechanics and come to the same conclusion. There are three reasons to marry a gay guy; 1.      money, 2.      social pressure and 3.      camouflage. Felicity doesn't need the money, so we simply assumed it to be number two. We totally missed the other reason; Felicity is a lesbian. Rio takes it in her slow and easy style. She walks up and puts Felicity in a gentle Mercy, Felicity, Rio sandwich. "I am going to have so much fun breaking you in," Rio whispers affectionately to Felicity. "When you get good at it, I'll let you play with Mercy, she likes to be played with but you have to be firm. Do you like it firm and hard, my most favorite and annoying little Ass-Tramp?" Subtle like a freaking tsunami. Mercy recovers from her shock to nod her head vigorously. "What about Barbie Lynn?" Felicity inquires with velvet hunger. "She's Zane's," Rio informs her. Felicity looks a bit disappointed. "Zane shares her though, so don't expect her to fall in love with you," then leans in and up, "but you'll find out her lips, titties and ass are to die for. Now let's go back to my room and let me show you some things," Rio grins, looks over her shoulder and gives me a wink. Who's room? Barbie Lynn pats my ass then skips after the trio. "We are going to lube up Mercy and try out some of the basics," Rio instructs Felicity. "We'll see what intrigues you then I'll send you home with some toys to practice with and, well, loosen you up a bit. Mercy didn't become fantastic overnight. I had to work on her a lot. See, and the conversation is drowned out by the rest of the students on the floor. No one has batted an eye about Mercy, Rio, and/or Felicity either. Maybe I really am the downfall of the Judeo-Christian tradition after all. Rio is taking responsibility for Mercy. Mercy just stepped out to the World as her true self, a tiny, tiny step anyway. Barbie Lynn is playing Dorm Mother in spades and in a manner way beyond the Handbook's job description. Valarie, Vivian and Iona have gathered together then when Vivian finger-beckons me over. I saunter over to see what's going to go wrong with my life next, and if they have any Tribbles hiding there I'm going to burn the little bastards in the sink. That's not what brings me over. "All the Advocate-candidates have been approached and agreed to serve," Vivian seems amused to inform me. "They want what little ceremony exists to be performed and the Advocates sworn in at 9pm." "Has someone worked on an Oath of Office," I groan. 'To one's self be true', what else can I say? "It seems some of the prelaw students actually had a little contest and they've put something together," Vivian smiles warmly. "It has been downloaded to your phone, it is under Advocate Oath of Office." "Why are you being such a smart ass?" I look her over. "Hasn't my day been bad enough?" "Zane, have you seen your phone log for the past twelve hours?" Vivian asks me. I have been ignoring my phone, in fact. I check it now and I bless those hard working Taiwanese and the huge memory capacity they've put in my global lifeline; otherwise my phone would have melted down hours ago. Fuck, I have phone calls from people I don't even know, who live in, France, Germany, Brazil and Belarus? I rack my mind to remember where Belarus is, blonde-haired, blue eyed Slavic ladies, now I know! The viewing of Star Trek humiliations seem to be universal but at least they don't know my name or face. There is some serious Time Lord Mafia paddling over this one. They've used my damn private phone number. "When do you think you'll talk to Rio," Iona asks cautiously. "I'll take care of that right now, while she's feeling happy and playful," I comfort Iona. "Besides, it could be worse; everyone is looking for a pudgy Sasquatch, not me." The three ladies all stare at me. "Oh fuck," I groan. "Well," Vivian looks away (oh hell), "the footage sort of shows you taking a shower plus your name and phone number." "But your transformation into is a fur-ball is truly precious," Valarie comforts/mocks me. "All my gal-pals out West think you are so cute; Phoenix, one of my Mom's jailbird friends, even used the 'too cute' emoticon and I didn't even think she knew what emoticons were. She sent it to all her buds still in lock-up too." "Great, I'm popular in a women's correctional facility, at least it is in another state," I sigh upward. I pray to God that never becomes relevant. "Hell, I have a housewife in Belarus she wants me as a house pet." "What does she look like?" Valarie seems curious. "How would I know?" I am somewhat offended. Valarie takes my phone but I don't resist too much. She scrolls a bit then hits the number. "Don't call her," I bark. Valarie laughs then hands me my phone back. She shows me the 'entirety' of the girl's message. Nice bikini, or what there is of it and I can't imagine it being too practical that far north. She is divorced, with a one year old son, 22 years old and fresh out of college with a job as a PR specialist for a real estate development firm. She also speaks seven freaking languages, I feel like such an underachiever right now, or male underwear model. Maybe I'll make her a pen pal ~ she's a half a world away. I should be safe. Right now I can't play it safe though; I have to go play with Rio and I know that violates my health insurance under the 'feeding dangerous animals' clause. "Zane," Iona offers to take my phone so I give it to her (why should I distrust her right?). Her delicate little fingers fly across it then she hands it back. "You now have a fifteen minute warning," she is trying to be helpful. "Paige seems to have vanished," I request, "so when you see her, tell her to give us some peace please." The three of the saner women I know give me a nod. I round the final screen and there is my sleeping platform. Barbie Lynn and Felicity are examining a stunning large collection of sexual aids (that my credit card must have paid for), which Rio is sedately explaining to them, sort of what you would expect from a Mary Kay or Avon saleswomen. Mercy is bent over the bed, pushing up her ass by standing on her toes, skirt and panties gone and surreptitiously undoing her blouse buttons when she thinks Rio isn't looking. Mercy even flashes a precious grin my way when she sees me. It is the 'Weeee! I'm about to get fucked' look. While amiably chatting away, Rio puts her hand over one of Felicity's hands and leads it over to Mercy's flank. Felicity puts up a token resistance. "Do that again and it will cost you," Rio purrs. Felicity stares at Rio's feral nature, seeing her truly for the first time then obeys. "Good girl," Rio coos in Felicity's ear. That reminds me what I've forgotten to do today, the air filters. I look around the various wardrobes for some sort of precision tool like a baseball bat, crowbar, sledgehammer, fire axe or chainsaw, I have a cricket bat? What the hell am I doing with a cricket bat? Isn't that the National sport of India; is it even played on this continent? It may be one of a kind; I'll spare it. "Zane!" Rio snaps. Apparently she's been calling my name for a second or two. "Yeah Bro, what do you need?" I answer. I'm not being attacked by someone so she must need something from me. "Felicity is self-conscious about being naked in front of us girls," Rio grins. "Could you pick out a swimsuit for her that is conservative and demur?" In Rio-speak that means three small circle Band-Aids and some dental floss. "What color would you like Felicity?" I ask. She says white; I groan because when you sweat/drip on white it becomes translucent. Maybe she's teasing me. I pick out a Rio-approved set (she has a whole drawer labeled 'Slut Wear' after all), hides it from her until I walk around and hand the 'suit' to Rio. Top lesson: 1.      Rio is in charge. Rio approved approves the look suit then hands it to Felicity. "You expect me to wear this?" Felicity gasps. "That's going to cost you Sweet-cheeks," Rio grins wickedly. "I can't wear this," Felicity stammers. Rio puts a finger to her lips to stop Felicity from saying anything else. "I apologize, Ms. Tolliver," Rio nods, "I think you are in the wrong place. Thank you for the books; good-bye now." Felicity is looking back and forth between Rio, Barbie Lynn, Mercy and me. Barbie Lynn gives Felicity a friendly shrug; I mirror that gesture while Rio takes up a medium lavender dildo, a bottle of lube and pours an expertly delivered thin stream on the tool and Mercy's asshole as if they are one. She's pointedly ignoring Felicity. Felicity is a 'Prom Queen' type and now some jumped-up freshman has dismissed her like she is nothing; I doubt that has ever happened before. On the other hand, Rio is brazenly open with her sexuality and sexual desires; a freedom Felicity has always felt denied her. Felicity almost makes a crucial mistake but I catch her starting to form the words 'I'm sorry' to me but I redirect her with a tilt of my head. "I apologize," Felicity whispers. "Zane, could you take over for me please," Rio says. I step around to her far side and start working my dildo slowly into Mercy's rectum. She wiggles her ass playfully to the intrusion. Rio steps up to Felicity, rises up on her tiptoes and grips Felicity's head firmly but gently. Rio tries to kiss Felicity but I can tell the taller blonde's jaws clench and her body stiffens. "One last chance," Rio insists. She lets the implications sink in then kisses her again. It is a close thing but Felicity finally breaks down and let's Rio's tongue master her tongue, mouth and lips. Felicity moan eradicates a decade of repression and denial and it is with some reluctance that the taller blonde lets the short, darker Rio settle down. Rio presses a finger to Felicity's lips again. "This is going to be the last time I'm nice to you for some time," Rio begins. She stops Felicity from speaking once more. "Zane and I are closer than family, he's number 1 in my book; there is no other. I will call you whatever I want to call you and you will not talk back. My safe words are 'That fucking hurts' or clapping your ankles together if you can't speak." "Mercy is mine; hurt her and I will bury you, my hand to God. Outside of that, I will use you like I want to. I will show you things you've only read about, make you dress in clothes that terrify you, and press you as hard as I can because I care about you Felicity. Are you a virgin?" Rio inquires. "Yes," Felicity moans somewhat frightened. "Your vaginal virginity is yours, your oral and anal virginity are mine," she explains. "When I say come over, don't make excuses, bring your ass to wherever I am. I am going to be hard on you and give you to my friends to play with because it amuses me, clear? Are you okay with this; if you aren't, this is your last chance to back out because I will hunt your ass down after tonight." "I can, I'm okay with this," Felicity says with less trepidation. "Okay Bitch," Rio growls, "Take off your shoes, panties and skirt; pick out the paddle you think you deserve to be spanked with and bed over the bed. That shirt better not be in the way. Oh, you are leaving your bra with me tonight, go home without it. You only wear panties if you have my permission as well." "Yes, Felicity falters. "Call me Rio," she clarifies. "I'm not afraid of who the fuck I am. You've looked down at people like me all your life and now you are going to be as degraded as what you wanted me to go through. Payback is a bitch." "Yes Rio," Felicity confirms softly. "Well, get to it," Rio snaps and swats Felicity's ass. "I want to waste some time on my beautiful, wonderful, annoying slut here," she moved to Mercy, "and her tricky little self has been taking off her clothes without my permission." The slap Rio plants leaves a red handprint on Mercy who exhales contentedly at Rio's attention. "Oh, you've been a naughty little fuck-slut, and you are wetter than the damn river," Rio whispers in Mercy's ear as one hand pumps the vibrator in her ass and the other strokes her wet cunt. Yeah Rio, that's putting the fear of God in Mercy, right. Felicity takes the most-wicked looking paddle available and I've never even seen Rio consider using. "Bro, we have a meeting at 9pm so we need to break it up in about an hour," I give the bad news. "Zane, damn, take over Mercy once more; I trust you with her but I want tears and if you could get her to bite up a ball gag, I'd appreciate it," Rio asks. Mercy has been placated and her position with Rio affirmed. She's a happy little Bottom once more because Rio finds her annoying, which means 'love' when translated into sane people-speak. "Barbie Lynn, warm her up for me," Rio requests of the blonde bombshell as she falls on Felicity's behind's like a Bedouin dying of thirst. I can see Felicity about to turn and plead for Barbie Lynn's attention because she mistakenly believes BLT will be hesitant. Boy, she's in for a surprise. Barbie Lynn's thumbs push the base of Felicity's softly resistant ass up and apart. Barbie Lynn is lapping like a dog at Felicity's cunny alternating flicks of the tongue along the labia and short, rapid intrusions. "What kind of sick masochist are you?" Rio snarls, waving Felicity's chosen paddle before her eyes. "I use this to crush the skulls of rogue water buffaloes; where was I supposed to hit you; on the asses of your ancestors cause that was where you were headed? What the hell was this even doing in my collection anyway?" "Also, what are you doing with your bra still on? I'm going to want those bad boys milked before you escape tonight," Rio grumbled. "You didn't, Felicity starts to protest even as Barbie Lynn twirls her toward orgasm. "Shut up!" Rio hisses. "Barbie Lynn, teach her a lesson." Barbie Lynn frees up one hand long enough to give her one 'moderate' spank. "Where is Paige; I need her nimble, spider-like finger of Evil." I can't seem to spot her so Paige is forced to clear her throat, she has carefully hidden herself behind my, pillow; she's hiding by the simple expedients of being in semi-darkness and being very still. It is so eerie I almost love her, love her. "Jesus H. Christ," Rio jumps. "I'd put bells on you but I'd probably end up with them in my cunt, now that actually, focus Rio!" she chastises herself. "Paige, help me strip my latest toy down and give her nipples a stress test," Rio requests. "Deal, but you need to do me one favor," Paige starts crawling over toward Felicity. "Sure, now get snappy," Rio urges her on as starts to pull Felicity's shirt over the girl's head. "Forgive me for forcing Iona to help me and the Time Lord Mafia," Paige cashes in her favor immediately. It is all the more self-sacrificial in that I suspect Cordelia kept Paige out of the whole plot. "Bitch," Rio seethes at Paige, "if you messed up Iona I'll still find a way to make you pay, I promise you." "You granted me a favor," Paige reminds Rio cautiously. "Zane, do something," Rio pleads. "I've already sworn not to make the responsible parties pay, beyond what Cordelia has already granted me," I grin. "I get Paige's ass whenever I want, how often I want, until the end of October," I add. Paige lowers her head and trembles with fear and anticipation; the 'threat' of anal sex is something Paige and I are working through plus, since Paige fears it, Rio will love the fantasy vision of Paige squirming on my 'meaty pole', see Barbie Lynn's thesaurus. Rio can't get away from Paige fast enough, falling into the narcotic pleasures of Mercy's treasures. Rio is often misunderstood; pain is a daily part of her life brought about by her blatantly aggressive lifestyle and the wraiths of her past. Mercy isn't in any danger; she could hardly be safer at the moment, figuratively speaking. Mercy's ass and cunt are getting a workout to the point I'm afraid that Rio is going to shove that dildo all the way into Mercy's colon and Rio's tongue might end Mercy's 'pesky' virginity by tongue-muscle action alone. Paige shoots me a sad smile before she gets on her back and starts sliding under Felicity. When they are face to face, but running in different directions, Paige and Felicity exchange some wistful kisses. "You are beautiful," Felicity moans down at the pale pink lips and snowy skin of someone who is working both overtime at being my lover and more importantly, a friend to my group of friends. "I know," Paige responds confidently before wiggling her way further under Felicity. Soon she has the first taste most likely anyone has had over of her breasts and nipples. I can tell when Paige draws in the first full gulp of tit because Felicity goes off like a bronco mare with a cougar cub on her back. She is making deep, guttural moans but at least she's not screaming her head off. "Rio, do you want Felicity to taste my tits?" Paige asks. Rio is being petulant. "Rio, if you want I'll never talk to Paige or Iona again because they are both Time Lord Mafia and they all had a part to play in this," I declare. "I know of only one who didn't, and if she's my sole friend with them after this, so be it, but you have to let me fight my own fights alone from time to time and let me decide what counts as a victory." "Fuck the bitches," Rio pops up, much to Mercy's astonishment, "One is more than enough." "Fine, Iona is out Rio. The only one who didn't have a part in this morning was Paige," I tell Rio. "I'll go tell her that you two are done, but I'll have you know she was operating under my orders, sort of. I told her not to go against Cordelia and she did as I asked." Rio seems truly conflicted for the longest time then she drapes herself over Mercy's body. "Honey-hole reach back, take over and keep yourself going or I'll make you feel up each Karate Club member during practice Monday," Rio purrs to her lover. Mercy hastily obeys because I think something about the way the situation playing out intrigues her. Rio shuffles down to Barbie Lynn, Felicity's posterior and Paige's head. "You fucking lied to me you freaky douche," Rio declares venomously at the albino Paige. Paige wisely keeps silent, there is nothing positive she can say. SheRio plants four resounding smacks on Felicity's exposed bottom. Felicity squeals, distracting Rio momentarily. "You'll pay for that, you skank," Rio hisses at Felicity. "Paige, how fucking dare you disappoint me," she growls. "How dare you act above my expectations; you are almost a human being," Rio finishes - as if the term 'human being' is as horrid a term as ATF agent or fashionista. Rio stands up and views her domain. Mercy is going all out though she clearly misses her Top and Felicity is panting herself toward another, more prolonged climax. "Barbie-licious, would you take care of my prize for me; you know what she likes," Rio requests with a hint of her normal madness. "Paige, give her some nipple-age and I'm going to break in Felici-hump's whore-hole." For the English-speaking public that means (I think) that Paige is to open her own shirt, unfasten her front-access bra and lead Felicity's lips to those translucent, succulent breasts I find so tasty. Felicity is clearly in a sexual buzz; otherwise she might spend precious minutes trying to figure out that Rio just declared her intention to introduce Felicity to anal sex of the strap-on variety. "Hey, pansy-boy," Rio mocks me and my reclining majesty, "get over here and give me some of that magic tongue and finger work that will turn her back into a straight." That's just mean. "Please don't make me like men," Felicity stammers. Her eyes are glassy and feverish. Rio smacks both buttocks this time and Felicity squeals louder. "You don't get to talk, you listen," Rio commands. "You are a perfect lover, a lesbian," Rio explains from some teasing twisted core. "We simply sleep with men to control them, but I don't want you sleep with Lance without my permission, is that understood?" Felicity keeps her words within her lips as well as going back to use another one of Paige's nipples for further succor. This is just bizarre, the bi-sexual is demanding/empowering the lesbian to not sleep with her gay fianc , I couldn't write stuff this weird and then avoid rehab. "In fact, Zane has an in with your future Mother-in-law and she'll tell him if she even suspects her baby boy is having sex with a woman," Rio double-pumps her eyebrows at me. Rio doesn't 'know' that I'm having sex with Rochelle Wellington; Felicity's soon to be MIL. We do both know Lance, the fianc , likes playing with other men's cocks. We have the video file to prove it too. "You step out on me and I'll sell you to that sorority next door to Zane's house for a weekend," Rio threatens. Felicity isn't Mercy, she's repressed while Mercy is perverse (by outside standards). Full exposure to the town at large frightens Felicity because she doesn't want deal with the social consequences of being labeled homosexual. Mercy is actually afraid of her sexual proclivities themselves as well as the real physical danger of exposure. Once Felicity finds her own identity her relationship will change, in essence she'll never replace Mercy in Rio's heart. There is never going to be that vulnerability and utter acceptance that those two have. Felicity is going to be fun and in time I think Hudson Lane may be a better match as a companion. Hudson and Felicity are adults where Rio fights adulthood with every breath. Rio's choice in strap-ons is odd to say the least; the only time Rio had shown it to Mercy, Mercy had been afraid, afraid that Rio would waste their time on something so, unimpressive. Until I noticed Mercy's distress that morning I didn't think Rio had something so, (training wheels?) in her arsenal; this was what Rio picked to break Felicity in. No one knows my buddy like I do. Rio is still working Felicity's bunghole over with a sole finger when she leans over the tall slender blonde's back. Rio uses one hand to cord that long hair until it is one thick mass, and then she pulls it back like a corded rein. It isn't until the tip of the dildo nestles into the cusp of Felicity's sphincter that Felicity figures out what's about to happen. "No Rio, please, I don't want this," Felicity panics. "Sssh," Rio coos, "it is going in and I'm going to teach you how." "Rio, I don't," Felicity trembles. "Why?" Rio whispers her question. 'Why is Felicity afraid of this violation' is what Rio is aiming for. They stay there locked and silent. After a minute, Rio picks up her actions. "When I begin to thrust forward, I want you to use your inner muscles to push back," Rio says tenderly. Rio goes forward and Felicity tenses so she stops. "Relax, it won't hurt, only feel funny," Rio assures her. Not always true but, This time things culminate with Felicity gives a sharp gasp followed by a whispered sigh. "Okay," Rio murmurs to her prey, "I am tired of doing all the work. You need to push back now," she continues. "Come back against me you cunt-loving whore." Felicity bucks slightly and shakes her head. "No, no," she pleads at barely above a whisper herself. "It's okay," Rio runs a hand along Felicity's spine. "You can come back later if you like. Your ass is mine but I'll wait for you to give it to me but, no cunt for you to taste or lips upon your cunt until then Felicity. I'll be taking care of Barbie Lynn for you". Rio winks at me, "Or more likely you are leaving her for Zane, man that he is; you know she'll get addicted to that cock eventually." Bang! Felicity looks heart-shot. Felicity starts working Rio's artificial cock down her asshole. Rio looks at me and gives the best 'Home Alone!' face I've ever seen. She's floored that Felicity has been sucked into our mad circus. She then puts both hands on Felicity's hips. "Slow down Felicity, and welcome to the club," Rio grins down at her. Felicity rests for about thirty seconds then Rio spanks each flank. "Giddy-up now; you still have four inches to go." "I thought I could stop," Felicity whined. "You said, "You stopped; I let you stop," Rio sneered, "Now I'm telling you to back your sweet ass up." I'm going to give Rio a Janus mask for Christmas. I'd get her medication for her insanity but I know she'd eventually slip it into my food no matter what. "Come on now Felicity-Sugah," Barbie Lynn joins it. "You always had such a gentle hand training me in Karate. It'd be a crying shame if no other girls got to feel the way you made me feel. You have always been so strong, be strong now." Felicity rotates her head somewhat foal-like and stretches the hair Rio is using as a rein before she pushes back again. This time when Felicity stops Rio slaps her ass lightly. My buddy also grins madly at me and mouths 'I am so going to Hell over this' then giggles. I mouth back 'Right beside you'. Felicity is finally all the way back and resting when Mercy begins to shudder violently. "Holygoddamnfuckingpieceofshit!!!!" Mercy howls into the sheets. Barbie Lynn hammers her bunghole and mangles her clit so much that she repeats the phrase three times in rapid succession and all the time she looks as compassionate as a mother changing a newborn. Felicity takes that inspiration and runs with it. Rio is pulling back with the strap-on when Felicity pushes back hard. Rio pushes her forward and rotates her hips for more of a sensation before snatching up a slender blue paddle that seems more flexible than rigid. She quickly makes good use of it, stinging Felicity's rump and making the ride home for her interesting. Paige starts flicking Felicity's clit but that is more than Felicity can take. Thankfully she releases Paige's right tit before she clamps her teeth and bows her back up and down multiple times as orgasm hits her. Rio has to grip Felicity's hips tightly to not be bucked off and she's loving it. Felicity collapses on Paige but I quickly roll Felicity on her back, Rio's strap-on slides out painlessly, so I can pull Paige to me. Paige and I exchange a heated kiss while Rio unfastens the dildo, lets it fall to the floor. Rio crawls on the bed, hooks a finger into Mercy's collar and forces the exhausted beauty to follow her farther up the bed. Rio reclines against the headboard with Mercy resting her head on her Mistresses stomach, hair cascading over Rio's stomach, crotch, and thigh as well as her own face. Rio is running her hands through her lover's hair with an affection few at the school would believe. Barbie Lynn decides to take her own approach with Felicity. She mentioned experimenting with girls before meeting me on the day I first moved into this dorm, downstairs and a long, long time ago it seems. With the fear that permeated this place, it was probably furtive touches at night in bed with your roommate or a quick grope in the showers. Felicity barely has the time to register Barbie's presence before Barbie Lynn has Felicity's legs up, bent at the knees and cunt full exposed. Barbie doesn't dive in, instead crawling onto Felicity's body until they are face to face. Felicity gets this surprised, I can't believe this is finally coming true' face, the Barbie Lynn's lips are pressing hers. "Hey Honey-Trap," Rio snaps playfully, "what do you think you are doing with my Thing Two?" (Note: Never combine Rio and Doctor Seuss on You Tube; legions of little minds will be forever corrupted) "Give it a rest Rio," Barbie Lynn looks up and grins at my Bud, "Felicity gets a time-out and she gets to have it with me, are we clear?" This is not a fight I'm stepping into and Rio, Mercy and Barbie Lynn know it. Barbie Lynn doesn't ask for much from Rio and is pretty tolerant of her so now that Barbie Lynn is making a stand and, "This is really hard on her," Rio says affectionately. "Take your time." I leave Barbie Lynn and Felicity to play and carry Paige around to the far side of Rio. Paige is coiled around my body so I doubt she could be happier outside of 'bouncy, bouncy'. "What's going on Babe," I whisper to Rio. "What's your game?" "Don't tell anyone because they won't believe you but I've been reading," she tilts her forehead against mine. "I've been reading the diary of an actual dominatrix by the firelight of me burning 'Fifty Shades of Someone Stupid'." "You are right," I snicker, "no one would ever believe you actually read a book." She punches me then Mercy shoots me a weak blow to the ribs. "Hey you," Rio tapped Mercy's nose, "who said you could get in a fight? I think someone is getting hog-tied and ice cubes rubbed up and down their spine." Mercy shivers happily. "Do you want to do anything like that with me," Paige purrs. "I want to sneak into your parent's room and fuck you hard on their bed in every position we can think of," I state calmly, as if I've given it great thought. Paige's dampness streams down onto my left hip and thigh as she shivers in delight. It is all about knowing your partner. This forbidden act knocks her right out of the ballpark. "Are we, you and I, any closer?" Paige murmurs. "You know who has my heart, Paige, but we are closer, if that matters," I tell her. "When did that happen?" Paige smiles up at me. "About fifteen minutes ago," I kiss the tip of her nose. "So I had to lie to a total nut-job to save another friend of yours and risk a beating to take us a step forward, and it wasn't the black leather micro-mini," Paige moans as finds the perfect spots on my chest and lap to settle into. It is a precious few minutes we share, with Rio alternating tender caresses with pinches to the nipples and slaps to the breasts, buttocks and thighs. Mercy makes mewling little sighs in response to both sets of gestures. Felicity has finally rolled Barbie Lynn over and engaging in every less-than-vanilla sexual act she thinks she's missed over the three years she's known, showered with, and competed with my Georgia Honey-box. By the play of Barbie's right hand, the thick, sloppy sound that's emanating from between Felicity's thighs and Felicity's shortness of breath, Barbie Lynn is driving her former classmate made with lust. "Bro, can I turn Mercy into an ice cream dispenser? Sort of 'squeeze these wonderful titties' then scoop out some Neapolitan from her cunt," Rio snickers my way. She loves yanking my chain, and Mercy's, from time to time. "No! That has to be cold as hell and you may not make Mercy poop or pee dairy products," I command, "Rio-saurus Rex!" "Oh, that's gross," Rio dares to look offended. "I would never put ice cream up my favorite Lust-receptacle's butthole. That is for the ice cream cones." "Fine, you may not stuff Mercy like an clair," I clarify. "I'm putting my foot down and if Paige and I have to do full body cavity searches to make sure you behave, so be it." Felicity erupts through her final orgasm of the night, her body twisting and stretching as sweat drips off her body. Barbie Lynn keeps subtle control of Felicity's body which is both touching and frightening, she's getting sexually wound up and she's going to corral my cock and drive it up her ass, my approval being optional. The dirty, sexy look she shoots me is as good a piece of proof as I need. "I can't have you two touching my bitch without supervision," Rio states angrily, yeah right. "I'll have to check out all her opening once you two get done, a triple check." Mercy looks over toward Paige and me. Her eyes are open wide with lust and anticipation. "I suppose we could simply trust Mercy and take her word for it," I tease. "No," Rio goes off, "I can tell you right now; she's one sneaky little slut." "I don't trust her," Paige nods. "The pretty ones always need to be kept in line, harshly." Mercy merely shakes her head vigorously in affirmation of her devious and untrustworthy nature. "Where are you people from?" Felicity pants through her fatigued smile. "The People's Republic of None of Your Damn Business," Rio slaps Mercy's thigh. "We keep Rio in a steel box," Barbie Lynn pets Felicity's left nipple. "The rest of us are regular students. Okay, Zane's a tad irregular, but he means well." My phone buzzes from the far side of the bed. "Time to wrap it up team," I give out the bad news. "Felicity, you can sweep step out with Barbie Lynn to the shower, different showers because giving the freshman student body an alternative lifestyle exhibition is not an option for tonight. The rest of us will give it a few minutes and go out and pretend the world is a normal place." "Felicity, I want your bra and panties up here on my pillow," Rio demands. "I'm going to use them to bind up Mercy tonight. She's been, umm, mediocre so I'm gagging her with that boring underwear and hooking her hands over her head with that sad, old bra of yours." "I thought you only wanted my bra," Felicity questions? "Spank her for me BLT," Rio growls. Barbie Lynn gave gives three sharp, alternating smacks on each ass cheek. Felicity bites her lower lip and whimpers. "No back talking now F; I said no bra tonight, but also no panties ever without my approval." Felicity nods. Barbie Lynn takes Felicity by the hand, over to the towel closet then leads her somewhat reluctantly out into the main floor. "Rio, did I do you a good turn," Paige asks. Rio thinks that over for a minute, making small circles in Mercy's hair. "Yes, yes you did, you albino deviant," Rio allows. "Can I have Mercy for my use for one night sometime soon?" Paige requests. "That's not how it works," Rio scolds Paige after a few seconds. "She's mine to use, no one else's. I can have someone use her for my pleasure but she's a damn human being, not a bean-bag chair. I will give you this though, because you can be so incredibly stupid about people, I'll let Mercy know that it would make me happy to see her with you; how is that?" Mercy is resting on her head on Rio's lap, so she clearly hears what's going on. Rio is really the best friend in the world, and one of the best people I've ever known. I can live with the crazy. Homecoming. So, it was Friday, Homecoming Day at FFU, and several dozen of us were not doing what we were supposed to do but I wanted this headache taken care of before the rest of the day's festivities. All the Advocates were gathered as was Ms. Goodswell, as a Student Advisor. Other people were gathered to observe the spectacle and guessing which way I would jump. This first major crisis of my role as Mediator since the creation of the Janissaries wouldn't have been complete without Iona, my trusty sidekick, and Rio, my chronic pain in the ass & truest friend. In fact, Rio was the reason for this meeting. She had been given the writing assignment of 'place the writings of a juvenile story into an adult setting'. The train wreck wasn't hard to foretell. Rio had chosen four works of the late, lamented Doctor Seuss (if he wasn't dead he would be after reading halfway through Rio's creation). Rio had attacked the project with a gusto that made Ms. Tucker, her English instructor, hopeful that Rio was finally fitting in (read: conforming). Rio turned in the pornographic Tales of a Cat with a Really Big Hat on Tuesday. Ms. Tucker had flunked the effort and dragged Rio down to Doctor Victoria Scarlett's office but that senior educator had volleyed this time bomb into my lap. I promptly told them to pick an Advocate and get back to me after dinner. Rio Talon/Christina Buchanan's argument had been that the vagueness of the instructions allowed for a liberal interpretations of the assignment. Athena Varna (representing the rest of Ms. Tucker's class)/Joy Jefferson had argued that the standard was what 'any reasonable individual going to a Christian school would find acceptable' as their defense, which meant that it wasn't acceptable in their opinion. Two days of mediation went nowhere and I wasn't going to let this matter fester through the weekend. I had called all the concerned parties to join me after breakfast and received Doctor Scarlett's blessing for missing Assembly where many of the students and their families were gathered in our daily religious/social function. "Okay, I've given the matter serious thought and I saw merit to both arguments but I found Ms. Jefferson's argument to be the more compelling," I led off. "We live in a society; each person should be free and act with freedom but that cuts both ways, we have to give our society some support to retain our harmony. This is my judgment." "I would hope that since Rio did make an exceptional effort in her creative writing work that Ms. Tucker would consider allowing Rio one additional week to make up the assignment since this is one-quarter of her grade and her effort, while misdirected, was acknowledged as a vigorous attempt. That is my suggestion anyway," I said hopefully since I wasn't sure if I could instruct a teacher in any manner, much less order a do-over for Rio. It took a few seconds for my words to sink in. This was hardly re-writing the Charter of the Commonwealth of Virginia but it did mean I'd ruled against my best friend and the woman I wanted to marry and several girls looked at me in some disbelief that I hadn't gone that way. "Thank you Mediator," Joy was the first to offer me her hand, and she was still technically the enemy, being in the Traditionalist faction here at school. "Your argument carried the day, Joy. I'm pretty sure there was no favoritism involved," I smiled. "I will get you next time," Christina came up and shook Joy's hand. She turned and clasped my hand after that. "You were wiser than I thought you'd be," Christina winked to me. A few people came by and went through the same routine until Rio approached last of all. She hit me in the shoulder causing multiple heads to swivel our way. "You threw me under the bus Bitch," she laughed. "Don't look so surprised," I rubbed my shoulder, "you built the bus I rolled over you with, ya Deviant." Iona gave me a shy wave right before she slipped out to go meet her parents and most of the girls did likewise. Finally it was Ms. Goodswell, Christina, Faith, Rio and myself. "Faith and I will polish off the minutes of your final decision Zane," Christina said before turning her imperious head away and leading Faith out to do what seniors do. "So, are you two going to be hiding out all day?" Virginia Goodswell looked Rio and my way. "I would but two dozen over-eager and overly-endowed students have asked Zane to be available to meet their ancestors or some other such cheesy crap," Rio ranted. "Besides, I'm sure there is some law or ordinance that causes the rest of you to never leave me alone." "Yes Ms. Talon," Ms. Goodswell said with some gravity, "That is the Self-preservation Act of 1908. You are listed under 'Elements with Corrosive properties." "Woot!" Rio hollered, "I'm a corrosive influence!" "Thanks Virginia," I addressed my teacher and Spiritual Advisor, "like she needed more ammo." Goodswell laughed and headed out toward the main campus while Rio and I headed for our dorm. "I think I'm going to become a superhero," Rio teased me. "My X-ray vision will vaporize the panties off of unsuspecting stuck-up babes." "Wasn't there a time when heroes were heroes and villains were villains; none of this gray crap?" I half-grinned. "Zane," Rio sounded exasperated and but motherly aka Ma Barker, "you keep saving girls and they keep kicking you in the teeth." "I look at it as opportunity to get back up again," I smiled. "That's called masochism, look it up," Rio sneered. "Let's go to my room," I said, rather redundantly, as we'd reached the elevator door and I'd hit the button. Rio became oddly close to me as we got on board and even let me wrap an arm around her. For me, being parentless today required I convince Aunt Jill that parking would be a bitch and I'd see her Saturday night, we had our first Marksmanship outing tomorrow morning in Kentucky, so I'd would be back to have dinner with my sole family member. Rio's parents hadn't asked Rio if she wanted them to come. They hadn't made any contact at all, denying Rio the ability to scream at her parents and tell them to 'fuck off'. Adding to the misery, Mercy's parents were here and everyone in our close circle had convinced Rio that being close to Mercy would be disastrous, in the belief that Rio had poor impulse control, imagine that. When the end of Assembly sounded and the parents began exiting the building to join up with their kids, we proceeded to my Solarium level of the dorm. The parents would meet their girl's friends, teachers, & the key members of their various clubs. We opened my 'vault' door and Rio led me upstairs then gave a start. I slipped around her to see what the problem was, Cordelia Dresden. To her credit, Cordelia and her Time Lord Mafia had either been behaving or doing things in such a sneaky manner as to avoid my notice. Besides the three of us, only three freshmen girls occupied the rest of the floor, leaving us effectively alone. "Hi Rio!" Cordelia led off, "Zane, I only want you to know you have our full support," was her cryptic statement that I was still digesting when Rio hurled herself at the slender brunette. Cordelia cried out as Rio toppled them both to the floor. Rio rose up on her knees and slapped Cordelia across the face. "Get her off me," Cordelia screamed as she raised her hands to defend herself. "What's the fucking secret you're hiding?" Rio growled. "Yank Rio off me right now. Zane," Cordelia snapped as she took a second slap to the cheek. "You know what I can do." "Cordy, Rio wants to live free or die trying; so you might want to consider your next words carefully," I shrugged. "She prefers to exist free of fear. Rio, I'm going to the shake dispenser; do you want something?" "A strawberry shake sounds good," Rio smiled as she began pinning Cordelia's wrists down. Once she finished that maneuver, Rio glared triumphantly down at Cordelia. "Great," Cordelia met that glare with one of her own, "what's your next brilliant plan; a little sexual assault to go with your brazen attack?" "Nope, I'm going to drool spit on your face and ears Cordelia-baby," Rio answered then began swirling her tongue in her mouth to gather up her first glob of spit. "Zane," Cordelia pleaded. "Rio, let her up," I requested (Rio knew my vocal tones). "She's agreed to help you with your Mercy problem." Cordelia had done no such thing but Rio would need help dealing with her lover's parents and Cordelia could be a powerful ally. Cordelia could lie her way out of things, except she would be lying to me and our trust was a fragile thing. If it was just Rio, Cordy would lie in a heartbeat but I believed I was somewhat special to her. Cordy said nothing and Rio got off of her. It wasn't Rio's style to offer Cordelia a hand up even though she knocked her down. Rio joined me making shakes and grinned evilly. "Cordelia, do you want a shake," I called over to her. "Peach," she replied. Somewhat reluctantly she walked over to us. Cordelia, like Rio and me, had no parents coming. "So, are you going to tell Zane what your secret is or do we go for the best two out of three falls?" Rio sneered. "Let it be Rio," I nudged her. "It isn't something bad. If it was bad, she would have coughed it up already." "I don't know what you see in this wacky Whore," Rio asked me, with Cordelia standing beside us. "She's Ra's al Ghul to my Bruce Wayne," I explained. "How can I step beyond the streets of my own personal Gotham without her?" "Wait, does that mean I'm Harlequin?" Rio mused. "No, you are the Joker, Rio," Cordelia huffed, "and yes, that makes Mercy Harlequin." "Cordy, there are times I wish you weren't so evil and manipulative," Rio observed. "Titles such as Evil, like genius, are the hobgoblin of small minds," Cordelia countered. "Zane sees that, which is why I tolerate the rest of you." "You just want to play jockey to his thoroughbred," Rio snorted. "Never said I didn't," Cordelia bantered. Rio stole a look toward the door so I leaned into Cordelia. "Thank you," I whispered. Cordy nodded. "Pist," Rio hissed. "Iona is here with a slightly larger version of herself and two guys who look vaguely related to her as well." I looked over and there was Iona pointing what had to be her mother my way. She didn't look furious but she wasn't beaming sunshine and happiness at me either. "Scatter," Rio whispered. "Pissed off Momma on the way," before dashing off behind the showers. "I'm gone," Cordelia gasped playfully, took her peach shake and slunk away. Iona "Mr. Braxton?" this conservatively dressed woman with a slight build and shoulder length black hair addressed me. I'd seen a few pictures of her on Iona's Facebook page. "Mrs. Beckett, I am Glenn Zane Braxton, but please call me Zane. Your daughter is one of my closest friends." She seemed to mull that over, whether to be stiff or to give me a chance. "Zane, is there a place we can talk in private?" she inquired. "Absolutely," I nodded; then led her to the far corner and sat down on a sofa with her so that we could both look out over the changing leaves on campus. "Mr. Brax, Zane, what are your intentions with my daughter?" she came right out with it. "She was my second friend here and constantly supportive of my often precarious situation and she's never asked for anything in return," I stated. "I'd paint her house if she asked me," I continued, "or drive across country to help her move. She's that great a friend." I didn't brag about killing or even hurting someone for her, though I would, because that wasn't the kind of extreme friendship her Mom was looking for. "Very well, Zane; but I am worried about you and Iona in another way," she sidestepped. "You are an attractive young man and there are rumors that you have several girlfriends on campus." "I think I can answer the real question with three statements of my own; the only person I have ever called girlfriend is Heaven Vickers, a senior here. "I love Heaven's best friend, Christina Buchanan, and they are both aware of our relationship. Second, your daughter is the second-smartest, most level-headed, and most forward thinking young woman I have ever met; you have done a wonderful job raising her," I related. "Lastly, I have offered to have sex with your daughter twice and she's said 'no'." "You did?" she studied me intently. "And she was naked in bed with me both times. She's seen me have sex, too, but she's decided that when she's ready, she'll ask me and I'll say 'yes' because I'm positive that she will pick the moment when it is right for her and no one else." "Wha, what?" Mrs. Beckett's eyes grew wide. "Naked in bed with you? And nothing happened?" "Yes; but I felt safe because I trust her," I said calmly. "You have to admit she is diligent and organized and she's not going to simply jump feet first into anything." "I have to admit I was afraid you were taking advantage of my daughter's kind nature; but you seem oddly frank about everything you two have done. I admit I expected you to be, more deceptive and evasive," she mused. "Do you have sex with any of the girls on campus?" "Tons; though thankfully, things eased off with midterms approaching," I smiled. "Is that so," she said in a clearly questioning tone. "I want you to understand that Iona thinks the world of you. She writes home every day, and you often figure in her experiences, though I knew she was editing some things, like why she appears to be friends with Ms. Talon." "When we started out, Rio and I were doomed to be expelled but Iona joined with us and together we survived some really rough times." "I recall getting several letters from the Chancellor from that time. Was Iona in any danger?" she asked. "Yes, she got a pair of bloody knees but please believe a whole lot of us were looking out for her," I responded. "Trust me, Ion has a fair number of friends who appreciate her numerous qualities." "Mom," Ion called out as she came over. "I hope Zane hasn't been scaring you." "Iona, it is only that you didn't have many friends in High School," her mother smiled at her daughter. "Mom, I had no friends in high school, but Zane gave me the courage and opportunity to come out of my shell," Iona interrupted. "Zane says you two have been sleeping in his bed, naked," Iona's mother met her daughter with an even gaze. "Yes," Iona blushed furiously, "but I bet he's also informed you that we haven't had sex," she leaned into her mother, "and there he lied." Mrs. Beckett stared at me, a bit peeved. "Mom, that is only because what Zane considers sex and what you would consider sex are two slightly different things. Suffice it to say, I am still a virgin as far as the marriage bed is concerned," Iona assured her parent. "And I have Zane well in hand, because I have control of his phone." "I keep telling you that smarts count for more to in life than a model's good looks," Iona's mother reminded her daughter. "I'm glad Iona has both," I chimed in. Both women looked my way then grinned. "He is such a good friend, Mother; that I forgive his exaggerations," Iona reached over and kindly touched my cheek. As that gesture ended, Iona's face grew shocked. "Mom, I think we need to go see Mrs. Worsham's class now, if we are going to get everything taken care of before lunch," Iona hurried her mother. "It was nice to meet you Zane," we shook hands as we both stood as well. Hope I followed Iona's gaze and my heart stopped. It was Hope, looking so do-able in her school-wear. With her were a petite woman, smaller and maybe a bit heavier than Hope, three more little Hope's in descending age and lastly, a male version of Hope, but this one was made out of Lego bricks, really big Lego bricks, it was Yeong Song. Yeong Song had charisma in spades; he wasn't the Angel of Death, he had grabbed that punk by the short and curlies and taken over his job. That was how he appeared to me at that moment. Oh yeah and he was looking right through me. As if on cue, Hope smiled and whispered something to her father and they both came my way. Imagine a choreographed interpretive dance troupe; you had Hope's three younger sisters spread out over the middle half of the room, having fun with some of the few freshmen girls that were hanging around. Yeong was like his eldest daughter in the way they moved, you could tell they were walking toward you but I couldn't recall their feet moving or even hearing footfalls. That was probably just my fear speaking. From personal experience I knew Hope was human with all our frailties and imperfections, she was simply more perfect than most. "Father, this is my good friend Glenn Zane Braxton, who is known by the name Zane to both his friends and enemies," demurred Hope. "Zane, this is my Father, Major of the Republic of Korea, retired, Yeong Song," she introduced her father to me. I extended my hand, he took it in a granite grip and gave it two sharp shakes. I stood there like an idiot but at least my heart was beating and I was breathing again. "Your pulse is racing young man, your palms are sweaty and you are staring at me with dilated pupils," Yeong noted dispassionately. "Well, since I've lain down with your naked daughter for a variety of bedroom antics on several occasions; I naturally assumed you had come here to kill me," I blathered. "You have been naked with my eldest daughter," he said in a way that could be contrived as a statement or a question. "You didn't know?" I groaned. I wondered if this counted as suicide. "You have honorable intentions toward my daughter," he informed me. Huh? "No," I gulped. "I was thinking we could fool around, mainly." "I understand you are the last of your line," he glared at me. Uh oh, wait. "You know who I am, so you must have already been told by Hope what's really been going on," I breathed a sigh of relief. "See Father, Zane's not dense," Hope hugged her father's arm, "he's simply terrified of you." "I noticed," Yeong almost smiled. "Mr. Braxton, I don't mind you seeing my daughter socially, but please learn at least to fight as well as my youngest daughter, she's nine." "You learn from people who are better than you, not from people you are

This weeks episode Christine covers the highly unsettling unsolved missing person case of Maura Murray who disappeared from a single car accident on the side of a snowy mountain road. Tayler tells the story of the best/ost exclusove music festival that never was. The Fyre Festival where rich kids were given cheese bread and soggy mattresses. What a time to be alive.Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Disciplining Grandchildren ~ I have to spank my angry, irresponsible, absent daughter's children. Listen to caller's personal dramas four times each week as Dr. Kenner takes your calls and questions on parenting, romance, love, family, marriage, divorce, hobbies, career, mental health - any personal issue! Call anytime, toll free 877-Dr-Kenner. Visit www.drkenner.com for more information about the show (where you can also download free chapter one of her serious relationships guidebook).

Topics include: #RateMyMeal wants me to suckle him or something... Hip thrusts giving people AIDS, and there's other things that are ridiculous, plus OVERTIME for members!Join The SwoleFam https://swolenormousx.com/membershipsDownload The Swolenormous App https://swolenormousx.com/swolenormousappMERCH - https://papaswolio.com/Watch the full episodes here: https://rumble.com/thedailyswoleSubmit A Question⁠ For The Show: https://swolenormousx.com/apsGet On Papa Swolio's Email List: https://swolenormousx.com/emailDownload The 7 Pillars Ebook: https://swolenormousx.com/7-Pillars-EbookTry A Swolega Class From Inside Swolenormous X: https://www.swolenormousx.com/swolegaGet Your Free $10 In Bitcoin: https://www.swanbitcoin.com/papaswolio/   Questions? Email Us: Support@Swolenormous.com

Talking spanking with Hugh Jas.

For this years halloween episode we have half assed costumes and full assed stories! Tayler mortified Christine with the unsolved case of the still unsolved Hinterkaifeck Farm family murders. Christine shares the case that became the inspo for the harrowing opening scene of the movie Jeepers Creepers. The case of Dennis and Marilyn DePue. Happiest Halloween friends!Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Topics include: #RateMyMeal was off the charts. Kink shaming is real and Sergiy is a bionic man...or something from another dimension. Oh, there's more too!Join The SwoleFam https://swolenormousx.com/membershipsDownload The Swolenormous App https://swolenormousx.com/swolenormousappMERCH - https://papaswolio.com/Watch the full episodes here: https://rumble.com/thedailyswoleSubmit A Question⁠ For The Show: https://swolenormousx.com/apsGet On Papa Swolio's Email List: https://swolenormousx.com/emailDownload The 7 Pillars Ebook: https://swolenormousx.com/7-Pillars-EbookTry A Swolega Class From Inside Swolenormous X: https://www.swolenormousx.com/swolegaGet Your Free $10 In Bitcoin: https://www.swanbitcoin.com/papaswolio/   Questions? Email Us: Support@Swolenormous.com

In this episode of The Underground Lounge, Lou Williams and Spank sit down with R&B icon Case for an unfiltered, hilarious, and nostalgic deep dive into the highs, lows, and wild stories of a true 90s rockstar life. From his early grind in New York City to becoming the last artist Russell Simmons personally signed to Def Jam, Case walks us through his come-up, the legendary sessions that birthed hits like “Touch Me, Tease Me”, and the moment he realized his life had officially changed.Case opens up about growing up with a father who once sang with Cameo, his first demo being written by Faith Evans, and what it was really like navigating the golden era of R&B. He shares stories about promo tours, sleeping in cars between gigs, and the kind of hustle artists today rarely experience, back when getting signed actually meant something, and you had to earn your shine through radio runs, live shows, and word of mouth.The conversation quickly shifts from music to madness, with Case recalling wild nights in Philly, hanging with Allen Iverson, and the unforgettable moment that got him banned from Hot 97. From jumping out of hotel windows to being mistaken for a rockstar, the singer holds nothing back as he paints a vivid picture of the fast-paced, no-phones era of fame and chaos.Lou and Spank dive into the evolution of R&B, debating whether today's singers have lost that soulful edge. Case breaks down why real R&B never died, you just have to know where to find it , while name-dropping some of the new generation artists who still carry the torch. He also gets candid about why he refuses to listen to his own music in the bedroom, how cell phones would've ruined his prime, and what it's like trying to perform through the flu while touring with Dru Hill.From his wildest groupie encounters to his funniest onstage fails, Case brings stories that are as unbelievable as they are entertaining. Between the laughs, he drops real gems about longevity, creativity, and the freedom that comes with still loving what you do decades later.This one's packed with raw energy, R&B nostalgia, and plenty of moments that'll have you saying, “They don't make ‘em like this anymore.” Whether you grew up singing “Faded Pictures” or you're just discovering Case, this episode is pure gold, a reminder of when talent, personality, and passion ruled the music game.

This week on The Underground Lounge, Lou and Spank sit down with one of comedy's most authentic and versatile voices Lil Rel Howrey, a Chicago legend whose hustle, humor, and honesty made him a standout in Hollywood. From hoop dreams on the West Side to headlining major films and creating his own projects, Lil Rel opens up about the road that got him here, the highs, the setbacks, and the lessons learned along the way.The conversation starts with basketball nostalgia, as Rel recalls his days playing high school ball in Chicago during the city's golden era, when Kevin Garnett, Ronnie Fields, and other prep legends ruled the courts. That same competitive energy carried into his comedy career, where he wrote his first romantic comedy script at just 17 and started performing stand-up before most people knew what open mics even were.Rel talks about betting on himself, walking away from day jobs, and carving out his lane in an industry that doesn't always make room for originality. He breaks down his love for rom-coms, the grind of directing his own feature films, and the vulnerability that comes with being critiqued once your name's in lights. From running his Chicago comedy festival to mentoring the next generation, his focus on giving back shines through every story.But it's not all serious talk, the laughs come nonstop as the crew swaps wild stories about college hoops, Chicago culture, internet trolls, and even the strangest rumors that have followed him through fame. Rel's blend of humility, wit, and perspective makes for one of the realest and funniest conversations you'll hear all season.Whether you're chasing your dream, finding your lane, or just here for the jokes, this episode is a reminder that the grind never stops, and neither do the laughs.

!!! LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT !!! Homefield Apparel's Can't Miss Kickoff Tour Presented by Modelo is rumbling to Myrtle Beach, just in time for Halloween, and all audible crewmates on the good ship Shutdown Fullcast will be on hand (nautical term) to celebrate. Join us on Wednesday, October 29, at 7:00 PM, and wear your most inexplicable Halloween costume. Get details and buy your tickets hereLike all good parties, this show has a theme: It's time to submit your HALLOWEEN DISASTERS to shutdownfullcast@gmail.com as well as this online submission form.Meanwhile, in the episode itself: When is a water jug not a water jug? And what is the most dangerous sandwich to consume after drinking to the point your own blood could be legally classified as a controlled substance?Fired Coaches Draft update, wherein Spencer shares a surprisingly deep collection of Trent Dilfacts ™Today in Convincing Statements From Bill Belichick"Was that coaching or was that RICO?"Motivational archaeology with Rex RyanSports news from BusytownLooking ahead to the Week 8 college football schedule (welcome back, Every Weeknight Football)ACC Friday Night Games: You're Not Better Than ThisThis episode produced by Michael Ray SurberShutdown Fullcast theme arranged and produced by Chris WatkinsDID YOU KNOW: Spencer and Holly write Channel 6, a year-round newsletter that is mostly about football, until it's notBefore the world ends (again), treat yourself to Jason's critically praised novel and other workTravel in your mind palace to Phantom Island, Ryan's new show with Steven Godfrey, which is not a college football show because another simply cannot existCheck out Surber's band Killer Antz and his new show PodcasterinoNow through December 31, 100% of proceeds from all PTKU merch sales will be donated to Trans Ohio. Visit preownedairboats.com to purchase exclusive PTKU Blue Sharks gear and other Fullcast-branded loot

Travel down the yellow brick road to Texas where you can experience All Things Wicked and Magical this year at The Lone Star Spanking Party happening November 6-10, 2025. As you move on down, move on down the road, you'll also find a dark and mysterious trail leading to a Gothic Masquerade… as well as experiencing all the spanking your bottom (or hand) could desire! (As if that was possible.)  Get whisked away on an imaginative journey as your fabulous hostess, Sarah Gregory, tells us about all of the magical excitement in store at Lone Star 2025. From classes and educational opportunities, to individual sign-up events, to dining and dancing, there's something at Lone Star for every spanko! It truly sounds like a weekend you won't want to miss! But you'd better hurry, the gates to Oz won't stay open forever! Tickets are going fast and rooms are filling up! CLICK HERE TO BUY YOUR TICKET  

this weel that gals are back and cover very spooky tales that came straight out of the Appalachia  Mountains. Get your night light ready!!! They also cover the story of Brenda "the cat" Delgado. the woman whose jealously landed her the 9th woman to ever be on the FBI's Most wanted list.Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

This week, Kate and Christina discuss surprise cheese curds, Jersey pork roll, how to host (and what to serve) a fugitive, and end with a little fall food porn.

How big is your blanket and how many people have access to that blanket? Do you share different blankets with different types of people? join us on this episode and find out what we mean by blanket consent.  generally people don't automatically obtain blanket consent, please be responsible when you play with others; practice self advocacy and learn to establish your boundaries, though this episode is not about that. We just want to remind you that it is your body and it is your choice.  There are fantasies and then there's reality. Sometimes it takes a lot of communication to be able to fulfill our fantasies; other times it may be instant chemistry, but please be advised:  You don't have blanket consent with everyone.  

The Underground Lounge presents a Special After Hours episode, co-hosted with Holly Joso, featuring Bay Area icon Too $hort. A pioneer whose name is etched into the fabric of West Coast hip-hop, $hort joins Lou, Spank, and Holly for an unfiltered conversation filled with history, laughs, and hard-earned wisdom from nearly four decades in the rap game.Too $hort opens up about his early hustle selling tapes out of his trunk in Oakland, and how that grind set the tone for a career defined by independence, authenticity, and relentless determination. He reflects on what it took to put the Bay on the map, the cultural impact of his legendary “pimping” persona, and how he's stayed relevant across generations while never losing his signature voice.With Holly co-hosting, the dialogue dives deeper into the culture that shaped his artistry, the wild stories that built his legend, and the mindset that keeps him pushing forward after all these years. From building his brand before the industry caught up, to collaborating with some of music's biggest names, Too $hort shares the triumphs, challenges, and lessons that come with longevity in hip-hop.This After Hours episode is raw, hilarious, and insightful, an inside look at a rap pioneer who helped shape the West Coast sound and remains as unapologetic and influential as ever.

Thiss week on Gloom & Bloom Christine covers the tragic story of Pro Wrestler Owen Hart and his death in front of a live audience and Tayler tells the deeply mysterious story of one of Norways biggest unsolved crimes of the Isdal Woman. Was she a spy? a deeply disturbed young woman? will we ever know??? Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Cuhmunity Ep 268 w/ Hit-Boy & Spank Nitti James Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Folks, President Trump went to the United Nations yesterday and—let's just say it—he took the UN to the hoop. I mean, it wasn't even close. The UN thought it was going to play a pickup game, and Trump showed up in full Jordan mode, tongue out, dunking on their heads. Holy Mother of Spank, he told that collection of bureaucratic bobbleheads exactly what they are: a bunch of freeloaders living off American tax dollars, pretending they're changing the world when they can't even change a lightbulb in their own leaky building.And here's the beauty of it—Trump stopped just short of saying, “You're fired.”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this special episode of The Underground Lounge, Lou and Spank welcome an icon who truly needs no introduction: Flea, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame bassist for the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Known for his explosive stage presence and innovative bass lines, Flea takes us through the journey of his life and career with honesty, humor, and reflection.The conversation begins with his early childhood and the jazz influences that shaped him, from Miles Davis to John Coltrane, and how picking up a bass in high school completely changed his world. Flea shares how his lifelong friendship with Anthony Kiedis sparked the foundation of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and how their bond, while tested over the decades, has been the glue holding the band together through lineup changes, global tours, and creative evolution. He recalls the band's rise from gritty L.A. clubs to massive stadiums, memorable festival moments, and the infamous chaos of Woodstock.Beyond the music, Flea opens up about his personal growth. He discusses the turning point that led him to give up hard drugs in his 30s, the role of sobriety in helping him embrace health and creativity, and how fatherhood continues to shape his perspective. He emphasizes the importance of self-love, learning from childhood traumas, and finding joy in constant growth, whether through reading, exploring new art, or picking up a basketball to shoot around at 57 years old.Naturally, basketball plays a big role in the conversation. A die-hard Lakers fan, Flea reminisces about the Showtime era with Magic and Kareem, the ups and downs of the team over the years, and his respect for LeBron James's longevity and excellence. The discussion connects the worlds of sports and music, highlighting how teamwork, trust, and chemistry are just as crucial on the court as they are on stage.The crew also touch on the cultural shifts in music, from the originality demanded in earlier eras to today's algorithm-driven sameness, and Flea reflects on the importance of pushing boundaries and staying true to individuality. He also shines a light on his nonprofit, the Silverlake Conservatory of Music, which has been teaching hundreds of kids every week for over two decades, giving them the same gift of music that changed his own life.From smashing guitars to smashing stereotypes, Flea proves why he's one of the most compelling figures in modern music. This episode is equal parts funny, insightful, and inspiring, offering a rare glimpse into the mind of a rock legend who's still as passionate, curious, and relentless as ever.

I answer some listener questions and talk spanking with Rylie.

Guys! This is a big week, we are two hundred episodes in, and we decided to celebrate the only way we know how.....by wandering into the shadowy corners of the internet. From Craigslist posts that feel like missing-persons reports to Yelp reviews that read more like haunted house confessions, we're digging into the eerie, the absurd, and the downright suspicious. Lock your doors, dim the lights, and join us for a milestone episode that proves: The scariest things aren't always on the news…sometimes they're on page three of the classifieds.Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

This episode the girls cover the tragic and still unsolved Yogurt Shop Murders and the highly disgusting Canadian serial Killer Robert Willy Pickton The Pig Farm Killer. Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Chunga, Chandler, Gregg and Chris REALLY don't want to do this episode… REALLY, REALLY! Lucky for Chris he's on vacation and enjoying the Oregon coast!  He won't have to go through this one. Why don't they want to do this episode? Well…they're going to spend some time talking about the horrible events of the past week—and Radio Ronin doesn't do this type of content anymore. However this is so important and impactful to all of us, that they have no choice.This episode may be too much for some, and that's ok. This episode may be too hard for some if your political beliefs are too fragile to allow you to consume a different perspective than your usual. They recommend you pass on this episode. Chunga, Chandler, Gregg and Chris have the utmost respect and appreciation for ALL of you. Hopefully they won't have to do anymore shows like this for a long, long time.  Regular Ronin episodes will resume on Thursday and they sincerely hope you all choose to join them.With that said, the Ronin do get to have some fun in this episode as well!  Hey, Chandler totally screwed up so we're going to try the CHUNGA POLL again!!!  What is your favorite Halloween Costume of all time?  Post your answers below!!!Panda and Spank have given Chunga some new cassettes and he couldn't be more excited!!!  What are they!?  The popularity of vintage cassettes is skyrocketing!!! Do you still listen to them?Panda has another “As Seen On Tubi” Halloween Movie ReviewAND!!!! It's time for your REALLY STUPID NEWS!!!! Listen now!!!!It's on www.radioronin.com and everywhere you get your podcasts!!!

Chunga, Chandler, Gregg and Chris REALLY don't want to do this episode… REALLY, REALLY! Lucky for Chris he's on vacation and enjoying the Oregon coast!  He won't have to go through this one. Why don't they want to do this episode? Well…they're going to spend some time talking about the horrible events of the past week—and Radio Ronin doesn't do this type of content anymore. However this is so important and impactful to all of us, that they have no choice.This episode may be too much for some, and that's ok. This episode may be too hard for some if your political beliefs are too fragile to allow you to consume a different perspective than your usual. They recommend you pass on this episode. Chunga, Chandler, Gregg and Chris have the utmost respect and appreciation for ALL of you. Hopefully they won't have to do anymore shows like this for a long, long time.  Regular Ronin episodes will resume on Thursday and they sincerely hope you all choose to join them.With that said, the Ronin do get to have some fun in this episode as well!  Hey, Chandler totally screwed up so we're going to try the CHUNGA POLL again!!!  What is your favorite Halloween Costume of all time?  Post your answers below!!!Panda and Spank have given Chunga some new cassettes and he couldn't be more excited!!!  What are they!?  The popularity of vintage cassettes is skyrocketing!!! Do you still listen to them?Panda has another “As Seen On Tubi” Halloween Movie ReviewAND!!!! It's time for your REALLY STUPID NEWS!!!! Listen now!!!!It's on www.radioronin.com and everywhere you get your podcasts!!!

this week the gals take you on a journey through an unlikely murder witnesse and an unjust tale of the wrongly convicted. This is the story of the murder and attempted murder of Marty and Glenna Duram. The only witness was the couples pet parrot and he has a lot to say about it. Tayler cover the highly depressing story of Joyce Watkins and Charlie Dunn the Tennessee couple wrongfully convicted of child rape and murder they spend 27 years in prison! Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

this week the gals cover stories of real life Final Destination style near death experiences and the murder of Carol Stuart. Her husband claimed an unknown black man shot them both during a robbery but the truth was that the actual murderer was actually much closer to home. Spank you for listening. Do less God bless. Gloom & Bloom out!

Bardi, Nathan and Windy have another exciting win to discuss.Check out our new merch: https://theextrainch.shop/https://drinkag1.com/extrainchThe Extra Inch Podcast, in association with 1882fanzine. Get your copy of the latest issue and the whole back catalogue at https://linktr.ee/1882fanzine.----------You've been listening to The Extra Inch, a Spurs podcast.Become an xSub: https://www.patreon.com/theextrainchProduction by Nathan A Clark (Twitter @NathanAClark).Intro music by David Lindmer https://www.instagram.com/davidlindmerArtwork by Trayton MillerGo get your merch at https://www.theextrainch.co.uk/Email us at podcast@theextrainch.co.ukTwitter: https://twitter.com/TheExtraInchFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheExtraInch/Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/theextrainch#Spurs #COYS #THFCThe Extra Inch is a Tottenham podcast brought to you by Windy, Bardi and Nathan A Clark. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.