The Confidence Podcast

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The Confidence Podcast is the podcast for women who struggle with perfectionism, self-doubt, and a self-critical voice. If you know you have potential and purpose, but you still secretly feel like you're behind, not enough, or even an impostor, then this podcast is for you. In each episode, world-renown Confidence Coach Trish Blackwell will teach you how to live confidently and courageously as the woman God created you to be. This podcast is your weekly resource to train your thoughts, take them captive, and use them to help you live with joy, abundance, peace, power, and, of course, confidence. Get FREE instant access to the Confidence Masterclass to learn exactly how to have more confidence with the 3-part "Confidence Formula" at www.trishblackwell.com/freeclass.

Trish Blackwell


    • Nov 30, 2021 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekly NEW EPISODES
    • 38m AVG DURATION
    • 310 EPISODES

    Listeners of The Confidence Podcast that love the show mention: thank you trish, confidence podcast, blackwell, listening to trish, half size, new thursday, weekly motivation, change my perspective, based episodes, confidence boost, love trish, found your podcasts, thinkin, body confidence, confidence is something, boost of confidence, inner self, positive and motivating, makes a difference, grabbing life.



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    Latest episodes from The Confidence Podcast

    #471: Comparison is Killing Your Confidence and Happiness

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2021 46:54

    Podcast #471 Comparison is Killing Your Confidence and Happiness Comparison is a default thought pattern that is killing your confidence and happiness, however, you can learn how to neutralize its negative impact on your life. This podcast episode gives 21 comparison detox strategies, along with 12 happiness hygiene habits to help you be victorious in your mental management of comparison in your life. Comparison is rooted is fear, and you can uproot both from your life, starting with this coaching. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/471 The sneaky way that fear shows up in comparison and what the fear underneath the comparison is doing to your confidence and your futureHappiness hygiene habits and how they help you detox toxic comparison from your default thinking patternsUnmanaged comparison versus managed comparison and what to do about it other than saying "I know I shouldn't be comparing myself, but …" Taking ownership of your relationship with comparison and your relationship with the level of happiness you have in your life.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Just what I needed, 5 Stars, Christina Slater From the first episode I listened to I was completely drawn in. I felt like I was being heard and that this is where I was going to get that extra help, that boost that I needed. I'd highly recommend this podcast.   PATREON UPDATE Announcing new options for supporting this amazing show. Hop over to my Patreon page for all of the options, including a new $7 /month support option that delivers Weekly Journaling Prompts. Additionally, you can become part of my VIP Squad, which includes all of our normal patron goodies, AND a shout out on the air, as well as the right to personally request the topic for an upcoming podcast. This week we're shouting out to Ryan Painter for being our first to snag one of the VIP Squad spots! Thank you for your support, Ryan! Go to www.trishblackwell.com/patreon to get started   LET'S COACH ON COMPARSION   Can we get real? Comparison is fear-based. Fear that we aren't enough. Fear that we don't belong. Fear that we aren't doing enough. Fear that we don't measure up. And the last time I checked, fear is not of God. I love this because it frees me. I can give my brain permission to feel the fear and then let it pass through, because it doesn't belong in me or on me. It's human to have, and the enemy of my soul uses fear to try to persuade me out of the light and joy into sadness and depression - but God always wins; since I know that, that means I have the victory (and the permission) already to live by faith, not fear. So, pause this for a minute. Think about the comparison in your life. And then fill in this sentence: …When I feel "not enough" in this area _________ I am actually just afraid that _______________. For me, it's been: When I feel not popular enough, I am afraid awkward and that I don't belong.When I feel not fit enough , I am afraid that my body will keep me from being loved.When I feel not pretty enough, I am afraid that people won't like me or see me.When I feel not successful enough, I am afraid that I am wasting my potential. Notice how you will recognize the "feeling not enough" … and when we pull back from our feelings to our thoughts, it's our thoughts that are FEAR BASED THOUGHTS that are creating the NOT ENOUGH FEELING … and those thoughts and feelings are both driven from the ACTION of COMPARISON.   UNMANAGED COMPARISON JUST ISN'T HELPFUL Learn to let go of unhelpful thinking. Unmanaged Comparison > unaware, focused on others instead of yourself, default, comparing up / comparing down, fear-based motivationManaged Comparison > intentional, internally focused in a healthy way, data-driven or focused with purpose outside of oneself Comparing. Looking around. Makes your journey longer and you less effective. Stay in your own lane.

    #470: You Deserve Better: Rejection Reframing

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 23, 2021 41:38

      Podcast #470   You Deserve Better: Rejection Reframing     The pain from past rejection keeps many of us from our fullest potential in life, both personally and professionally, but it doesn't have to when you learn how to reframe rejection. You deserve better than to expect to get hurt, to expect things not to work out or to expect disappointment. This podcast coaching session will inspire you with the tools for rejection reframing so you can start being more brave with your life. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/470   In the episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about…   Shifting out of self-indulgence and self-rejectionHow to separate romantic rejection from your self-worthReframing rejection so that you don't fear future rejectionLoving yourself through rejection and why rejection is actually sometimes a good thing   WOMEN RISING INSPIRE OTHER WOMEN TO RISE   Oh my gosh. Just had such a fun week, speaking at the Women's Legal Forum at The Notre Dame Law School. I help driven women overcome self-doubt, impostor syndrome, and perfectionism so that they can stop playing small with their lives and start making the bold difference in this world God created them to make. That's why I'm loving the ability to do more workshops. As you know, I specialize in working with high-achieving women who work in male-dominated fields, and a large majority of my private clients are women working in high-pressure, high-achieving fields, like the legal field, medical field, and financial field.  I'm really excited about creating an experience with strategies for confidence and positive mental health that these driven women can use throughout their entire careers. I can offer these services either virtually or in-person.   The main two workshops I'm delivering are:   Strategies in Confidence: Finding Your Voice in a Male Dominated IndustryStrategies in Confidence: Navigating Law School with More Success and Less Stress Email me directly if you want me to come and support your organization in this high level way. [Trish @ TrishBlackwell . com]   REVIEW OF THE WEEK   Thank you for  being my on the go coach 5-Stars I've been listening daily ... it truly have helped me work as a manager instead of feeling like an impostor. -RN manager / mom to. Be   BLACK FRIDAY ANNOUNCEMENTS   Most of my students and clients start with the intention of working with me for a few months, but stay for years. That's the beautiful thing about coaching. Once you achieve one goal, or experience one breakthrough, you create a new focus, and have even more confidence to tackle it with the confidence and support  that comes from being coached. That's why today THROUGH Cyber Monday, I'm offering $800 the cost of a Lifetime Membership to my coaching in the College of Confidence. Pay just $1500 once, and know for sure that I'll be in your corner for you, and you'll get access to every new course I ever. create for the COC for as long as the COC exists! Go to trishblackwell.com/blackfriday to grab it.   I DESERVE THIS … I DESERVE BETTER SEQUENCES   I deserve to take a break > I deserve better than to feel stressed tonight. I deserve to eat this ice cream > I deserve better than to have a stomach ache. I deserve this extra glass of wine > I deserve better than to feel hungover tomorrow. I deserve to buy myself this > I deserve better than to go deeper into debt Countering "I deserve this" With "I deserve better."   REJECTION AND HOW IT LIMITS OUR LIVES   Self-Rejections / Ways we reject ourselves: We convince ourselves we are not good enough. I might as well not try. Self-harming. Procrastination Isolating oneself. Always comparing yourself to others. Adjusting goals unnecessarily Letting others choose your path in life Ignoring your true feelings and gut Not speaking up   Social Rejections: We convince ourselves that other people don't think we're good en...

    #469: Confidence Strategies for Your Body Image

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2021 48:48

      Podcast #469   Confidence Strategies for Your Body Image     Body confidence is a thought process that anyone can learn to strengthen, and these confidence strategies for your body image will help. Learn 10 strategic things you can do to improve your body image and 5 life-giving, confidence-evoking affirmations to help you learn to love the body you are in right now. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/469  In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about… I'm sharing my two-decade long battle with poor body-image and how God healed me; how I went from body dysmorphic to body confident10 strategies for better body image5 important things to tell yourself daily to bloom in your body's beauty   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Full Review: “Trish,I cannot express how phenomenal you and your podcast have been in the last few months. I am currently in law school and learning to navigate a new threshold of stress/pressure. While I'm fortunate to be able to pursue my career goals, there have been times when I felt incredibly lost, alone, and defeated. Enter "The Confidence Podcast". I consider myself to be a fairly confident person, however you've taught me that developing healthy self esteem is not like learning to ride a bike: it's something that requires repetition, patience, and practice. You were the Full Review: “Trish,I cannot express how phenomenal you and your podcast have been in the last few months. I am currently in law school and learning to navigate a new threshold of stress/pressure. While I'm fortunate to be able to pursue my career goals, there have been times when I felt incredibly lost, alone, and defeated. Enter "The Confidence Podcast". I consider myself to be a fairly confident person, however you've taught me that developing healthy self esteem is not like learning to ride a bike: it's something that requires repetition, patience, and practice. You were the first person I felt that "got it", that understood the mindset, goals, and internal struggles of someone who pursues excellence in every area of life. You provide women with tangible skills and practices that can ACTUALLY be applied.  It was so different than the generic advice we're all used to hearing (“love yourself", "be okay not being okay" etc).You are a gift to humanity. Thank you thank you for all you do! Your reach is so much more than you could imagine!”  Wellington1180   PATREON UPDATE   Announcing new options for supporting this amazing show. Hop over to my Patreon page for all of the options, including a new $7 /month support option that delivers Weekly Journaling Prompts. Additionally, you can become part of my VIP Squad, which includes all of our normal patron goodies, AND a shout out on the air, as well as the right to personally request the topic for an upcoming podcast. Go to www.trishblackwell.com/patreon to get started   HOW I WENT FROM BODY DYSYMPORHIC TO BODY CONFIDENT   Etre bien dans sa peau. Instead of expecting your issues to disappear, focus on the development of your relationship with your body. For years I limited my growth and healing because I expected perfection in my body and my thoughts. I had to learn to think more openly, more kindly and more critically about why what mattered to me mattered. Pay attention to thought patterns and assumptions you make about yourself, and about others. (For example, I assumed I was broken, a freak and that change was impossible - I didn't even realize I had settled into a state of despair but I had. // I also assumed that no one else struggled like I did. So I looked at people and always thought to myself, "must be nice"...to not think about everything, to not count every calorie, to not question every thing that you think or to look in the mirror without criticism.) Instead of generalizing your desired change - use the power of specificity to start the transformation process. Ask yourself what you want to be different, and get specific.

    #468: How to Drop Limiting Beliefs and Believe Better Things About Yourself

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 9, 2021 36:05

      Podcast #468   How to Drop Limiting Beliefs and Believe Better Things About Yourself     Just because you have always thought one way in the past doesn't mean you have to always think that way in the future. This episode of coaching explores what you believe about yourself, how to drop limiting or negative beliefs, and how to pick helpful, life-giving and positive beliefs to start believing. You can learn to believe new things about yourself and this coaching is your first step. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/468   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're coaching on…   A discussion on belief, on unbelieving certain things, and how to believe better things.Understanding what you believe about yourself and what you don'tHow to drop old beliefs that are holding you back and develop new ones that transform your life, your body, your relationships and your work   ANNOUNCEMENT:   JUST A REMINDER… People who you need to stop caring about. -toxic people -critical people -sidelines people -lazy people -fake people -random people   REVIEW OF THE WEEK   Young, dumb and broken down... 5 STARS Grace-A I have never felt so connected with my mind, body and soul until I listened to Trish Blackwell. Being a teenager in college, I constantly struggle with relationships with food, positive body image, self love nad confidence. I have wanted to be the best me I can be for a long time, but never had direction. Trish is my spirit guide. She empathizes, inspires, empowers, and uplifts me whenever I listen to her. She is my go-to whenever I am in a bad gplace or when I need a boost of confidence. I'm always tleling my friends to listen to her podcasts. Because of her, I am living my best life and continue to see my inner light. Thank you Trish!!!

    #467: How to Believe that You Matter in the World

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2021 40:31

    Podcast #467   How to Believe that You Matter in the World     Knowing that you have a purpose, and knowing yours, will make your life come alive. It gives meaning to the mundane and puts fire in the places you want to wake up in your heart. Purpose is the drive of confidence that we all crave, but most people feel lost in this area. This episode will coach you on how to believe that you matter in the world, and then how to start showing up in a way that makes a difference. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/467   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're coaching on…   How to know you matter in this world, especially if you're feeling unfulfilled, without purpose or lost right nowHow to figure out your higher purpose and get started on itHow to continually support yourself and step into a bigger version of yourself, and your impact, with positive (and effective) self-talk.  I want to talk about this topic because I have had too many conversations with high-achievers who are just so in the zone on putting pressure on themselves that they have entirely lost their sense of humanity and purpose.  There's immense pressure we put on ourselves, but why?  When you don't know why you matter, the pressure, the performance, the achievements, they're meaningless. I don't talk about this often but I went through a season of my life, specifically after what happened to me that I share about in episode #444 and in Chapter 2 of Straighten Your Crown, that made me wrestle with meaninglessness and search for meaning.    REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   I love Trish! Aap915 She has helped me through so much! When I'm down I just put on her podcast! I also read her books! Thank you for being you!    PATREON UPDATES!!!    Announcing new options for supporting this amazing show.  Hop over to my Patreon page for all of the options, including a new $7 /month support option that delivers Weekly Journaling Prompts. Additionally, you can become part of my VIP Squad, which includes all of our normal patron goodies, AND a shout out on the air, as well as the right to personally request the topic for an upcoming podcast.  This week we're shouting out to Ryan Painter for being our first to snag one of the VIP Squad spots! Thank you for your support, Ryan!  Go to www.trishblackwell.com/patreon to get started    BELIEF STARTS WITH UNDERSTANDING:   The world needs you. God created you. Go to work.  Putting pressure on yourself doesn't work. You don't do better by being mean to yourself.  Make your life count by being yourself. God given potential.  --- > Your moral responsibility.  How are you stewarding what was planted within you? How willing are you to cultivate it?  How are you downplaying it or mis-tending it? How do you discount it by comparing to others?   HOW TO FIGURE OUT YOUR HIGHER PURPOSE AND GET STARTED ON IT   It's time to think about legacy. But first, extend yourself grace by knowing why legacy hasn't been at the forefront of your mind. Too busy.Too worn down.Too low in opinion of self.Too discouraged from comparing to others.Too rushed to believe you can do more.Too disappointed from your past to think you matter now.Too overwhelmed with how to have a plan to move forward with confidence. You were placed in the world for a reason. We don't get to see the full picture. Just a puzzle piece at a time. We do get to believe that the big picture is a masterpiece. We get to decide to be involved - or to pass our piece to someone else. We get to live with purpose and on purpose. Your legacy confidence will be attacked - do not be alarmed.    SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP   Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist.

    LIMITED ACCESS BONUS EPISODE: NO NEGATIVITY NOVEMBER

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 29, 2021 15:59

      Bonus Podcast Episode [Limited Time Access]   No Negativity November: How to Detox Negativity       Negativity steals from you.

    #466: How to Think Better Thoughts, Even If You Struggle with Anxiety or Overwhelm

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2021 42:05

      Podcast #466   How to Think Better Thoughts, Even If You Struggle with Anxiety or Overwhelm     In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're coaching on…   The key to being more than just a "positive thinker," but becoming a "powerful thinker."How to manage your thoughts and make your brain work for youMy method to confidently manage my anxiety, overwhelm and self-doubt   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Life changing! Dgreenw4 I listen to your podcast every single day! I get in these awful funks and it's literally like going to a therapist. Love that you're Christian and that you love fitness! I am a CPT and personal trainer at Burn Boot Camp so I have to keep my confidence and self love up so I can show that to others. You literally do that for me. I've tried so many podcasts and yours always helps my day out. None of the others ever compare. I can't even explain how much you have poured into my soul. I had an unfortunate event where you were talking about in order for a better door to open you have to close that other one. I closed that toxic door that day.. guess what…2 days later, my most incredible door opened. Just know, you are changing lives and helping people that truly struggle with intense anxiety and depression but that also has to radiate confidence in their career…you do that for me everyday. Thank you again for pouring into us that listen. You are touching love s and changing the world. Hoping to join your College of Confidence one day.   PATREON UPDATE Announcing new options for supporting this amazing show. Hop over to my Patreon page for all of the options, including a new $7 /month support option that delivers Weekly Journaling Prompts. Additionally, you can become part of my VIP Squad, which includes all of our normal patron goodies, AND a shout out on the air, as well as the right to personally request the topic for an upcoming podcast. This week we're shouting out to Ryan Painter for being our first to snag one of the VIP Squad spots! Thank you for your support, Ryan! Go to www.trishblackwell.com/patreon to get started   LET'S COACH! Powerful self-talk goes beyond just positive thinking, it's a combination of a few types of thinking. Positive thinking.Powerful thinking (intentional thought creation)Repeated thinking.   Types of Negative Thinking: Filtering (magnifying the negative in a situation and filtering out the positive ones)Personalizing (automatically blaming yourself or making it about you)Catastrophizing (anticipating the worst and carrying a bad experience beyond the moment , expecting it to bleed over into the rest of the day)Polarizing (things are only good or bad)   HOW TO MANAGE YOUR THOUGHTS AND MAKE YOUR THOUGHTS WORK FOR YOU: I get asked all the time how to reframe thoughts, and how to actually talk back to yourself effectively, so I thought I'd share the answer here.First, you have to write down your thought that you want to replace. Keep it simple and in as plain of language as possible. Then, answer it back directly, compassionately and with the truth, as if you were talking to a friend.I teach a few methods: Mental TeaThe Confidence JournalAffirmation ProclamationsGratitude on the GoThought ReframingIntentional Thought CreationBrain Dumps Have a Cup of Mental Tea.What's happening… (circumstances, situation)T: ThoughtE: EmotionA: ActionWhat happens next… (outcome, results) What is Intentional Thought Creation:Know the difference between an intention and a goal. Goals are future-focused, typically on a destination or specific achievement. Intentions are in the present moment, something to live out each day. Recognize unwanted thought patterns (gain awareness)Practice hearing your inner voice as an observer (assess what's happening in your mind, without judging your thoughts)Play around with what thoughts attract what result in your life (example: thankfulness attracts and creates joy and happiness)Define what you want in your life - make it...

    #465:Being Yourself When You Feel Disconnected from Others

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2021 41:06

      Podcast #465 Being Yourself When You Feel Disconnected from Others   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about…. What to do when you feel like you don't belong, and you're not happy alone and not comfortable around people.How to connect when you feel unable to connect or connecting feels flat or insincere and unfulfillingManaging the fear of being misunderstood and hesitation in wanting to speak up, post or have a voice out of fear that good intentions might be misconstrued   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: I am so excited to writing this review. I have listened to a lot of podcasts…but this one takes the cake for me. Not only does it provide me with positive and encouragement, but it is so relatable to my life experiences, and genuinely brings me closer to God. Trish is so personal and connects with every path of life that you could be headed down. She encourages you to take that step back to really focus on your life and the goals you have for yourself, and gives you the tools to make it what you've always imagined it to be. Thank you Trish for your guidance and continuous support. I'm so blessed by and grateful for you and this podcast. My path has never been so clear.   BE LIKED WORKSHOP If you want to learn how to like yourself, and how to be more liked, then you need to grab instant access to my newest masterclass, How to Be More Liked. Get access immediately today at www.trishblackwell.com/beliked   WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE YOU DON'T BELONG Learn how to be by yourself, and what the normal amount of down time is by yourself. Know what your head says to yourself when you're lonely. Mine says: You don't matter. No one cares about you. What you do doesn't matter. You're alone. Nothing matters. Everyone else is doing something interesting. Recognize the lies.Learn to like spending time with yourself.Normalize boredom.Admit that you're lonely, but know you're not alone; it's not just you.Write down positive memories or gratitude.Intentionally pursue connection with others- people or animals, known or unknown.Create a schedule, including a bedtime. (Sadness amplifies at night) It's harder to feel alone when you have a plan and a purpose.   HOW TO CONNECT WHEN YOU FEEL UNABLE TO CONNECT …Or connecting feels flat and insincere and unfulfilling Take away the vanity metrics of superficial and insincere relationships and connections on social media. Every connection you have is gold - don't downplay connection you do have because that person "is supposed to like you or help you" Connection is vulnerable. But you are brave, and open. You are willing to be seen, and if you are, you will be able to connect. But to be willing to be seen you have know that you are enough. You are worthy of being seen. Your story is interesting and matters. Your hobbies and likes are not random, or boring. Connection takes time, and practice. It's created tiny moment at a time. Practice with strangers, where there's no risk. Give a compliment. Start up a conversation. Go out of your way. Get curious. Connection comes from curiosity and conversation.   MANAGING THE FEAR OF BEING MISUNDERSTOOD Being misunderstood doesn't mean that you don't belong. We crave understanding. "I believe you have to be willing to be misunderstood if you're going to innovate." -Jeff Bezos Left unchecked, the fear of being misunderstood will: Stop you from being you Slow down your creativity Create overthinking and overwhelm, making you stuck in your own head Prevent you from creating connection with others Put blocks in your exploration of new ideas or thoughts Adjust your expectations.Decide how you want to define and understand yourself.Recognize your own place in the world and how you contribute.Be open to mistakes, failures and embarrassment as neutral experiencesAcknowledge your vulnerability and embrac...

    #464: Confidence Affirmations that Actually Work

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2021 43:37

      Podcast #464 Confidence Affirmations that Actually Work   Affirmations can transform the way you think about yourself and your life. They are one of the most powerful thought-habits we can have to tap into next-level excellence, and even though most people know this, most people don't do affirmations effectively or consistently. Learn how to write your own affirmations and how to create an affirmation practice that actually works, and that you keep doing. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/464 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast,  we're talking about…. Why Affirmations Work Affirmations to Stop Caring What People Think Affirmations for Body Confidence Affirmations for Those Who Are Too Hard on Themselves Affirmations for Dreaming Bigger How to Write Your Own Affirmations How to Make Your Affirmations Work for You   ANNOUNCEMENT: My mentorship program, the College of Confidence, is where real change happens in your life.This month we're going deep on:Improving your internal self-talk.You'll also get access to our awesome live coaching this month, including: Detoxing Stress-Inducing Self-Talk WorkshopHow to Talk to Yourself Effectively WorkshopQuick Win: How to Detox ComparisonOur newest course, Stopping the Cycle of Stress will be released on Monday, October 25th! Be sure to keep an eye on your inbox as there will be an email sent out with all the details the day it releases! The course will teach you why the stress cycle starts, how to disrupt it, and how to manage your mind, and your life to minimize the negative impact of stress on your happiness and confidence.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: A true blessing. -itsbrazybaby Trish, words can't describe how thankful I am to have stumbled upon your podcast but I am incredibly blessed to have been led to hear your words of encouragement! After a very difficult breakup 4 months ago, I was searching for something to help the heartache and brokenness I was feeling. I listened to probably 15-20 different podcast that led me nowhere, until I found yours. You have COMPLETELY changed my life!!!! I've been taking steps and listening to all the great words of wisdom you share, I've noticed an amazing shift on my perspective of things and small daily situations that come up at work or in day to day situations. I catch myself course correcting and thinking "what would Trish do" again the way that you help me and everyone else who listens to you is priceless. Keep being awesome!!!   WHY AFFIRMATIONS WORK: They set your mind on what you want to think for the day.They are your daily GPS, pointing you to where you want to go.They help you cut through the noise of the world.They challenge and overcome self-sabotaging or negative thoughts.They release you from fear, negativity, worry and anxiety. Evidence based research shows that affirmations, like prayer, actually rewrite the brain on a cellular level. Through repetition, affirmations reinforce an intention so deeply that it bypasses your conscious mind, and goes straight into your subconscious creating new neural pathways within your brain.   BE LIKED WORKSHOP If you want to learn how to like yourself, and how to be more liked, then you need to grab instant access to my newest masterclass, How to Be More Liked. Get access immediately today at www.trishblackwell.com/beliked   AFFIRMATIONS TO HELP YOU GROW IN KEY AREAS: Affirmations to Stop Caring What People Think: I love being myself and when I am most myself, the quality people I want in my life are most deeply drawn to me.I embrace today with lightness and joy for the freedom I have to be myself, to pursue the things that make my heart come alive and to lead with authenticity in my life. I love not being chained or distracted by the burden of caring too much what people think; instead, I now have energy to just love people and love being myself at the same time.I release any attachment to people's opinions that have ruled in m...

    #463: How to Do Conflict with Confidence

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 5, 2021 56:20

    Podcast #463 How to Do Conflict with Confidence   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we have a special guest, couples coach Marie Anderson, and we're talking about…. How to understand how to navigate conflict and communicate in a marriage. What does it mean to fight fair? The 4 things that trip up conflict dials This woman is fundamentally one of the reasons my marriage is what it is. She raised her son to be interested in what it means to be a man of excellence, what it means to fight fair, how to love someone through deep hurt and with profound patience, and what it means to love well.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Thank you. -Paulina_Nina You are amazing. I love you so much. Keep doing your best.   MARIE ANDERSON BIO Marie works with couples who want to have a better relationshipIf this (communication and conflict) are where you are getting tripped up, she can help you. Contact Marie directly at:ktamta88@comcast.net   QUESTIONS FOR MARIE: How did you get interested in conflict and relationships in the first place?In your work with couples, how do you recommend that people learn to navigate conflict and communicate in a marriage?What types of conflict are most common in relationships?Where do you see communication most often break down, and why? What are the communication mistakes most commonly made and why?What does it mean to fight fair?How do you keep a short list of offenses when you're frustrated, hurt and angry?What are the 4 things that trip up the conflict dials?   SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.   Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed. It's more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is available. Their licensed professional counselors specialize in depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflict, grief, and self-esteem. I want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you'll get 10% off your first month by visiting www.betterhelp.com/confidencepod   QUESTIONS ON CONFLICT FROM MY COMMUNITY But how do you encourage your partner to be motivated without seeming "naggy" or triggering conflict? Question: what do we do when our spouse spills the details of our conflicts with friends and family? I feel a betrayal of privacy and trust. And how do we get the other person to actually listen and hear us during disagreement? I'm not sure how to word this but basically how to be respectful, yet strong in your stance when the other person is adamant they are right and unwilling to budge. How do you work together when the other person isn't willing to.   HOW TO BE MORE LIKED, THE MASTERCLASS We all want to be more liked. And now I'm going to teach you how. Yes, ultimately, the way to be liked is to like yourself first, and so that's where we'll be starting. Grab a seat at my newest masterclass before we retire it and learn: How to like yourself (and how to know yourself)How to be likeable (and attract people to you without caring what people think)How to create a life you like (actually, one that you love)And more! Get your FREE spot at www.trishblackwell.com/beliked   LISTENER OF THE WEEK: Tatiana on IG You are definitely an inspiration! I love what you are doing. You have made such an impact in my life as well as many others!

    #462: Confidence For When You Feel Different or Just Plain Discouraged

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 28, 2021 36:09

      Podcast #462 Confidence For When You Feel Different or Just Plain Discouraged We live in a chaotic world filled with conflicting opinions everywhere you turn. In a world that is more connected than ever, we are more divided, more lonely, more isolated and more conflicted internally on standing strong in our own opinions, even when they are unpopular or simply opposed by those closest to us. This podcast goes into depth on how to stay confident in yourself, in your relationships and in your hope for the future when the evidence you have in front of you is that division is pressing and discouragement is around every turn.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: How to feel confident about the future when the future feels so discouragingCreating connection with others in a world of divisionThe secret to believing that life is different, but still good.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Trish Blackwell Confidence Podcast - 5 Stars, A Will NC Trish - you never disappoint. I have been a listener for years, a member of your college, and we worked one-on-one, as well. I am on the edge of a big change at work and needed some extra confidence. I was feeling myself teeter into thinking about staying small instead of taking the risk and chasing my purpose .I needed several hours of you in my ear to straighten my backbone. Thank you for hanging with me all day. It started with the very timely assertive podcast, followed by your entire people pleaser course in the College of Confidence. I knew from our work together that I was beginning to give into other people's comfort and sacrificing my goals and my gifts. I am happy to say that I am forging ahead and will be having a tough, but needed conversation today, unapologetically, I might say, because other people's feelings are not my responsibility! Cheers to being me and being free. Thank you!!!!   THE QUESTION THAT PROMPTED TODAY'S EPISODE: How do we appropriately "mourn"/bid farewell to life before 2020 and then still be filled with hope for life beyond it, beyond now? I keep getting so overwhelmed with feelings of will people always disagree? Will I ever travel again? Will my kids ever see the rest of the world? I know these are all "what ifs" and not at all productive. I also know that covid won't ever fully go away any time soon. So how do I find a peaceful reality affirmation that life is different but still good?   HOW TO STAY ENCOURAGED WHEN THE FUTURE FEELS DISCOURAGING Thank you for this question. I too am having all of the thoughts, and here's how I'm exiting them  from taking unnecessary space in my brain. I encourage myself that of ALL the years of the history of the world, God decided that I was best fit to live HERE, NOW, in 2020, 2021. I want to argue with this, but I trust His sovereignty and that makes me feel capable of standing strong in believing that yes, I AM WELL ABLE to not just survive these years and this transition of culture/life/limitations/pandemic, but to THRIVE in it.  What our new "normal" looks like is going to be different, but I assure you, it will be good. Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. You arrange your mind to be happy, you don't wait for life's circumstances to arrange themselves for you to be happy The happy brain is the person who experiences a happy life.A happy life doesn't happen because of the way normal looks like, the amount of travel we get to do or the circumstances in our lives. A happy brain is arranged to be happy. So, I can't arrange the future, but I can arrange my brain on how I want to think about the future, how I want to think about the past, and how I want to think about the present. If you're always holding onto what could have been, you'll completely miss what can be.I am determined to fix my focus not on what could have been, but instead on what can be and how I still believe with total crazy faith that the best is yet to come.  

    #461: How to Make People Like You More

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 21, 2021 38:03

      Podcast #461 How to Make People Like You More       Wanting people to like us is a part of being human, but sometimes a misplaced desire, or ineffective ability to connect with others creates inner insecurity. Get coached on the 3 basics on how to make people like you more, starting with first learning how to like yourself. When you master your focus on these 3 basics, you'll be more able to stop caring what people think and to have more social confidence when meeting new people and wanting them to like you.  It's okay to have a desire to be more liked. Let's just go about it in a confident, courageous, authentic, and powerful way.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about ..   How to make people like you moreThe secret to not caring what people thinkHaving confidence when meeting new people (and wanting them to like you)   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   The Most Helpful Brain Training Podcast on the Internet.- 5 Stars (Kelsey Sis) This podcast came at the perfect time for me personally. I cannot recommend it enough and continue to tell all my friends (and counselor - had to give that plug because I know you read these and they are pro-therapy about it as well, Trish, I'm your biggest cheerleader right now!) Having grown up in the church and worked in ministry for several years alongside my husband (before pursuing alternative careers) I am realizing how ill equipped and uniformed I was on what it meant to "take my thoughts captive." That verse just always felt like a nice suggestion, certainly not something that was ever possible. Trish takes this verse and concept and through her podcast equips us with the tools and practices necessary to TRULY take our thoughts captive. Whether you consider yourself faith-based or not, this is the most practical podcast I have ever listened to when it comes to training our brains. I believe for me personally it's the faith aspect that's helped it click in a whole new level for me spiritually. So grateful you've pursued this calling. I'm signing up for Patreon as well - I'm all ears on any advice Trish has to offer. The real deal.  THANK YOU!!! Ya'll, Straighten Your Crown has hit a #1 Spot for New Releases on Amazon, and I have YOU to thank!!! You are royalty.What if you could experience the ups and downs of life with deep confidence and profound security? What if you felt so deeply loved that you stopped caring what people think of you, that you stopped second guessing yourself? What if you really walked with the dignity and grace of divine royalty? That's what Straighten Your Crown is all about. This book is the mirror that you have been looking for your whole life. It's a mirror that reflect how God sees you and the delight that He feels about you. You will see that you make Him smile. These pages will open new options to you. The option to say no to self-doubt. The option to choose your thoughts. The option to achieve anything you want. The option to believe that you are enough. As you read, each chapter will invite you to step fully into being God's daughter. You're the daughter of the King. The King's fingerprints of love and protection are evident in every area of your life, from the mountaintop moments to the darkest valley, and as you read, you will see His love for you shows up in ways you have never before considered. It's time to know what it feels like to be enough. It's time to know what life feels like without anxiety, without stress, and without self-doubt. It's time to stand tall with confidence and shine like the light you were created to be. It's time to straighten your crown. Order 3+ copies of the book and you'll get an invite to my upcoming workshop, A Walk in Worthiness. Yes, there will be a beautiful, accompanying workbook to go along with it. Yes, it will be recorded and sent out to you afterward to watch and review whenever you want. Once you order 3+ copies, just email my team at book@trishblackwell.

    #460: How to Be Confident in Uncertainty and with the Unknown Ahead

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 14, 2021 44:56

      Podcast #460 How to Be Confident in Uncertainty and with the Unknown Ahead Life is filled with uncertainty and tons of unknowns, so learning how to stay confident in unpredictability is key to living with unshakeable confidence. Get a sneak peek into a chapter of my newest book, Straighten Your Crown, and how I have learned to embrace the unpredictability of life with an adventurous, open and light spirit, and how you can too.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, I'm giving you a sneak peak like I've never done before. You'll hear one of my favorite chapters of my newest book Straighten Your Crown: Rediscovering that You are Seen, You Matter, and the King Delights in YouMy favorite thoughts that I go to when finding myself in a place of uncertaintyThe affirmations I use when I feel overwhelmed with the unknown or life that feels out of my control   SNEAK PEAK TO THE AUDIOBOOK Chapter 6: Discovering Delight in the Unknown[INSERT IMAGE OF BOOK "BUY NOW" HERE and link to:https://www.amazon.com/Straighten-Your-Crown-Rediscovering-Delights/dp/0578943298/ref=sr_1_2?crid=9H7DZQLZ3ETY&dchild=1&keywords=straighten+your+crown+trish+blackwell&qid=1631396746&sr=8-2]   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Anointed, refreshing! 5-Stars -boisanadarapsan I recently heard Trish read one of her one star reviews in which someone said that the podcast was "basic" and that Trish was not a psychologist so maybe she should not be teaching on these things. I could not disagree more. I am a marriage and family therapist, and even though I am a professional in the mental health field, I can tell you for a fact that Trish has amazingly FRESH insightful ways of presenting information that will change your life. It's not so much about education…don't get me wrong, it's important, sure - but I can tell you from being in the field in a formal capacity that the most likely predictor of someone actually changing/growing is the connection they have with the therapist, not how "trained" they are. So when I relate that to Trish, the relationship we listeners have with her as a podcaster has so much to do with her God-given anointing in the way that she teaches and her God-given **amazing personality!!!** Some of the most influential and best teachers of all time had no formal training. When God anoints you, that is what matters!!! "God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called.!" If God's hand is on you nothing is going to stop you and his hand is clearly on Trish. I adore your personality Trish, I am a faithful listener, you are so amazing and I learn from you all the time! Keep up the amazing calling God has put on your life. You are a blessing to so many, myself included! We love you. God bless you.   SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.   Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed. It's more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is available. Their licensed professional counselors specialize in depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflict, grief, and self-esteem. I want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you'll get 10% off your first month by visiting www.betterhelp.com/confidencepod   MY GO-TO INTENTIONAL THOUGHTS FOR UNCERTAINTY

    #459: How to Be More Assertive

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2021 37:35

      Podcast #459 How to Be More Assertive Assertive confidence will open doors in life you didn't know were accessible to you. But how do you learn how to be the type of assertive that will be well received instead of the type of assertive that comes off pushy, demanding or bossy? You'll find out exactly how to do just that in this episode of The Confidence Podcast.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: The relationship between fear, people pleasing, perfectionism and lack of assertivenessThe skill of being assertive, and how to learn it in a natural way for youWhy we aren't assertive enough, and what you're missing out on because of it (why you should want to be more assertive!)10 ways to practice the skill of being more assertive   OH MY GOSH. IN PERSON COACHING AGAIN. My time with the NC State Wolfpack Women Swimmers & Divers and Wolfpack Women Gymnasts was absolutely incredible. It's been a week since I was with these rockstars from @packswimdive and @wolfpackgymanstics, and I'm still absolutely BUZZING with excitement about the season these women have ahead of them. These ladies are some of the top athletes in the country, and in the world.  And last week then gave me their full focus, their total buy-in and their hearts for over 12 HOURS of workshop time with me. It was epic. I have a ridiculous amount of confidence in what this year holds for these swimmers, divers and gymnasts. They are more mentally primed and deeply confident in the belief of their future success --- I can't wait to watch them wow themselves this year and exceed even their own expectations. Thank you Wolfpack Women for the privilege of being your mindset coach and confidence coach. Here's to an amazing year ahead!!! In these workshop weekends I teach athletes how to use the power of words to their advantage to become better athletes, better teams and better individuals. In my workshops we work to unify the mind and body to work in perfect symmetry, ensuring that physical talent and training is also matched by mental resilience and a desire for mental excellence. If you and your team want to rise up to your highest potential, I would be privilege to work with you. DM me to see if I would be a good fit for your organization.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: AMAZINGGG - 5 Stars, CWiphoneThis podcast is not just for helping your confidence, but has helped me get to know myself better and understand my subconscious better! Psychology is so interesting to me, and Trish does a great job of including psychology into her motivation. I absolutely love this podcast!!!   HUGE ASK: MY BOOK RELEASES IN 3 DAYS!!!! My book releases in 3 days!!! Eekkkk!Will you help support it's success?Here's how you can help. Preorder a copy. (www.trishblackwell.com/preorder)Purchase a copy or two for friends.Write a review on September 10th.Write a review.Write a review.   WHERE DO YOU WANT MORE ASSERTIVENESS? Delegation at work.Distribution of work in the home.Boundaries with people in your life.Freedom from feeling like a burden, demanding, inconvenience.Assertiveness to be yourself unapologetically.Time management with your family (asking for what you want and need)Self-care prioritization with yourself.Saying no to people.  Passive - Sure! I'd love to help.Aggressive - I'm tired of helping, sorry, you're going to have to do this by yourself.Assertive - I'm not going to be able to help at this time.   WHY YOU AREN'T ASSERTIVE Fear of what people think.People pleasing.Perfectionism. Have you ever thought these things… I don't want to be a burden.I don't want to bother them.I don't want to seem too demanding.I don't want to inconvenience anyone.I don't want to be an imposition.I don't want to embarrass myself. When you don't show up with confident assertiveness, you can end up… ResentfulBlamingDoing too muchDoing what you don't wantAccommodating everyone elseMissing outPaying moreBeing taken advantage ofMisunderstood ...

    #458: Better Sleep, More Confidence

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 31, 2021 37:10

      Podcast #458 Better Sleep, More Confidence     A better rested you is a better you. We all love sleep, but what if sleep is hard for you, or life circumstances are keeping you up at night, tossing and turning with anxiety and overthinking?  Your relationship with your thoughts at night is within your control, and this is good news for anyone who wants more hours or more restful sleep. A well slept you is more emotionally and mentally sharp, and will show up in your life with more confidence and courage.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about:   The relationship between sleep and confidence, and how to scale up both in your lifeWhy putting pressure on yourself to sleep better doesn't workHow to stop tossing and turning at night - 5 practical habits everyone should be doingWhat to say to yourself at night when you can't sleep and you're stressed about it   REMINDERS:   Ever just wish you could buy me a cup of coffee? Well, you can! That's what my Patreon page is for. You can support my free podcast work and help me cover the production costs of the show by being a $5/month Patreon. Just go to www.patreon.com/trishblackwell and I'll feel the love! Ever wish you could access all 458 episodes of the show, but can only see the most recent 300 in your podcast app? Good news for you! You can listen to the ALL on my website. Just go to www.trishblackwell.com/podcasts   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Such a game changer in my life! PowerBar08 I've been listening to this podcast for a few months now and it's made such an impact on my thought life and the way that I approach each day! I'm really working on my confidence and Trish is such a gifted communicator and incorporates God and her faith so well in each episode! I'm a young 22  year old and I'm growing so much by listening to your podcast every morning! Thank you for all you do!   THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN SLEEP AND CONFIDENCE   A well rested you is a fully alive you. Starting the day on empty gives you a mental handicap. The better you feel, the more courageous you will be. Sleep helps us recover from mental and physical exertion. Sleep helps our emotional load stay at more even keel. Fatigue exaggerates emotional load.   WHY PUTTING PRESSURE ON YOURSELF TO SLEEP BETTER DOESN'T WORK   There are three things that can happen at night. SleepRestRestlessness Ideally, we would all want to always choose "sleep," but realistically, you sometimes can only choose your back up option. You get to pick two, and by picking two, you're eliminating one. You get more of what you focus on. If you are tossing and turning, and afraid of not getting a good nights sleep, you're focused on restlessness, and therefore you create a night of restlessness as a result.   5 HABITS TO PREVENT TOSSING & TURNING   Optimize your sleep hygiene (WLWB list for night?)Have a simple and specific nighttime routineTrigger your nighttime routine to startMake your bedroom inviting and screen freeEmpty your mind (journaling, prayer) My WLWB for nighttime rest: Small and extremely moderate alcohol intake, stop social media scrolling at 9PM, ice cold water before bed, kitchen clean, drinks ready for next day, schedule reviewed for next day, nighttime skin care routine, beautiful pajamas, clothes laid out for next day, 1 minute of stretching, linen spray, iPad reading.   WHAT TO SAY TO YOURSELF AT NIGHT WHEN YOU CAN'T SLEEP   Yay! This is an opportunity I didn't expect to get to manage my thoughts.I don't have to sleep to be rested.I choose sleep and rest, and I release restlessness.I'm alive, I'm grateful and I was awakened to pray for someone.Those thoughts that are racing in my mind? I give them permission to pause - they'll be taken care of in full tomorrow and it will all be okay.   ARE YOU COMING TO THE WALK IN WORTHINESS?   It's an entire workshop on self-worth, and you can get an invite by just purchasing 3+ copies of St...

    #457: How to Give Yourself Approval and Believe You’re Good Enough

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2021 33:49

      Podcast #457 How to Give Yourself Approval and Believe You're Good Enough Not feeling good "enough" and always needing the affirmation, approval or acceptance of others can severely limit your ability to tap into your fullest potential and greatest amount of joy in life. This coaching explores how to give yourself approval, believe you're enough and trust your own decisions, even if you've struggled in the past with being a people-pleaser or with thriving on words of affirmation or on someone else telling you what to do. In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about: How to break over-attachment to other people's affirmations, approvals and opinions, even if you're a words-of-affirmation-love-language-personLearning how to give yourself approval, trust yourself and be your own voice of encouragement … how to know you're on the right path when the path isn't visible or laid out by someone elseA list of affirmations you can use to speak life into yourself - the ones that will help you believe you are good enough and that will help you trust your own voice, intuition and innate, God-given potential   REVIEW OF THE WEEK Awesome podcast - 5 stars Trish's calming voice, relatable storytelling and spot-on advice has been SO helpful for me. I just started a new job within my company and the confidence and stop caring what people think specific episodes have been really beneficial to me. I love that she has so many episodes that I can glance through and take what I need for the day. -SageSC   LET'S COACH! The path is unknown. Even if you think it's obvious for others, it never really is. The acceptance of the unknown is an acceptance of our humanity. It invites us into a life of faith, and confidence. It challenges us to think with belief and active mental management. We grow up in a very directional, progression-based environment. You complete first grade, you move to second grade. You advance your skill set in a sport, and you progress to the next level of mastery, training or competition. You graduate high school, and you move onto college. And in many ways, this structure is excellence. But in some ways, it handicaps our confidence in our own choices. You have a path unique to you. You get to learn how to trust the direction you choose to go. Whichever direction I take, it will be awesome.   OVER-ATTACHMENT TO PEOPLE'S AFFIRMATION I needed applause, affirmation - but this belief limited my full growth, my access to impenetrable peace and real freedom. It's okay to be a words-of-affirmation person, and feel loved by compliments and affirmation; we all need that to some extent … but, we also have power when we learn how to give it to ourselves. If you wait for others, then you'll get stuck in the performance/pressure cycle…or people-pleasing, and you'll get the affirmation you crave, but perhaps not for an area of life you want or care about. Overly relying on other people's validation or direction removes you from your own natural ability to trust your own judgment.   GIVING YOURSELF APPROVAL Yep, good job, me. Yes, that's a good decision. Yes, I've got this. Sure, I can probably figure that out. Absolutely, I'm growing and on my way. We do this as young children, and so why did it lose it's luster? We shout "I did it!" or "I can do it!" and yet we outgrow that as adults? It became uncool at some point. But what's more uncool than that, is the self-doubt that suffocates the real you from shining. The desperate need we all have within, hoping we are accepted, loved and noticed. You don't have to wait for someone to notice you, you can notice yourself. When you decide to think that you are amazing, you'll feel amazing. When you feel amazing, you'll carry yourself amazingly. And when you carry yourself amazingly, people notice.   TRUSTING YOURSELF Make a choice and stick with your choice.

    #456: What to Do When There’s No End in Sight

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 17, 2021 39:18

      Podcast #456 What to Do When There's No End in Sight Overwhelm, whether it's in your personal life or your professional life, can derail your confidence, drown you in self-doubt and leave you feeling flailing for hope and purpose. In this coaching, you'll learn what to do when there's no end in sight. You'll learn how to stay filled with faith, how to have peace in your confidence, and how to think the right thoughts that will fill you with power and perseverance. In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about: Overwhelm, and what to do when you feel burdened by it.How to have hope when there feels like there's no end in sight.The belief thoughts and self-talk that will help you neutralize overwhelm   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Diving ProvidenceOnetwobree Inspired scripture tells us clearly that the one true God has predetermined every moment of suffering and joy we will ever have, but it's always incredible when you can step back and say "Ohhhh, I see why you did that there." It's funny to me how fast I found Trish once I took a tiny step towards growth. God really odes open the door when you knock. Trish tackles the real things that go through our heads in such an authentic way, but then she brings it back to Christ. It's rare and refreshing to find a coaching podcast that is more than what it seems. I'm so grateful for you, Trish! Can't wait to read your new book! -Quick announcement, opening up my waiting list, so if the Fall is the time of the year you are looking for change, go to www.trishblackwell.com/coaching   OVERWHELM & WHAT TO DO WHEN BURDENED BY IT Overwhelm is a feeling.It is a feeling we choose.It is brought on about our thoughts. I used to think "I'm overwhelmed, I just can't help it." Or, "I can't see an end in sight." But another point of consideration is: do you really need to see an end in sight to know that there's an end? Yes, I like knowing there's an end, but when my mind plays this game and needs proof, it's an invitation to expand my faith and my ability to callous and numb my mind to bounce back from the future moment and to stay in the present moment. Being overwhelmed feels like being flooded - it's an overload on the nervous system and brain by looking at things with a limited and small perspective, or from a place of exhaustion and hopelessness. Notice >>> It happens because we keep going without listening to ourselves (we aren't friends to ourselves … either not slowing down, not asking for help, or not creating better habits or boundaries) … and so we miss the signals that our body or our schedule has had enough. Types of 'no end in sight feelings' >>> financial seasons of struggle, sickness and never-ending bad news, weight loss or goals that take a long time, feeling stuck or in a dead end place in your life, anxiety and depression, email inbox or work projects, your parents expectations - or the expectations of the world for you to keep achieving… What you think on will multiple.Dwell on the bad news, and you'll feel the weight of it even more.Dwell on the hope within the bad, and you'll see pockets of peace and strength. A few mental techniques that might help: The Trampoline MethodBrain DumpToxic Thought ReframeSelf-Affirming Coaching Phrases (we'll get to those shortly)Being in a community for support (like the COC)   HOW TO HAVE HOPE WHEN THERE'S NO END IN SIGHT Everything does end.We know this.We can't see everything.Keep perspective.Fight for hope.When everything is going wrong, find adventure in looking for what is going right.Get curious about how and where overwhelm shows up in your life.I've been working on reframing overwhelm for the past 5 years in my own thoughts, and I still have ways that it sneaks up on me. (For example, when I get sick, my brain has a habit of panicking and then I think that I will be sick forever.)Watch for language your brain likes to indulge in. Phrases like:It's just too much.It'll never end.

    #455: Still Caring Too Much, Even Though You “Know Better?”

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2021 39:47

      Podcast #455 Still Caring Too Much, Even Though You "Know Better?''   You "know better" to care so much what other people think about you, but you're still feeling stuck in the people-pleasing, perfectionistic, desire-to-be-liked thought loop? This podcast episode is for you! Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/455   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about:   Exactly how to get out of the thought loop that is keeping you stuck7 critical things to remember to help you break this sloppy thought patternHow to find the place of mental power where "you can help it"   SPECIAL INVITE   Join us for the How to Stop Buffering WorkshopThursday, August 12Sign up for free at www.trishblackwell.com/buffering   ANNOUNCEMENT   I'll keep the story short.I wanted to be a cool mom, so I hopped on my 4-year-old son's skateboard.Insert cartoon image of someone flailing while slipping on a banana peel.And voila.I have a broken foot.For someone who loves to run, and runs between 35-55 miles per week, not being able to walk without pain, let alone run, is an adjustment.But a good one.I love the challenge of it.I love that God is inviting me into rest.I love that it's going to be a mental challenge, and I'm not going to back down from it.Remember, it's the challenges in our lives that make us into the people we become.That setback?If you look at it the right way, it's a beautiful thing.It's just the right thing that you've need to give you growth in an area you wouldn't have gotten otherwise.And so, this month, I rest.Which is a-okay with me, because behind the scenes here, I'm having an amazing month, with my foot elevated on my desk as I work.My newest book, Straighten Your Crown releases soon.Have you pre-ordered your copy yet?Don't forget that, when you do, you'll get a free audiobook copy.And, if you preorder 3+ copies, it gets even better.Anyone who preorders 3+ copies will get an invite to my upcoming live VIP Workshop on WORTHINESS .You're not going to want to miss this.Just click here to preorder. >>> www.trishblackwell.com/preorder   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   NEVER disappointed on a Tuesday!!!-Ashmccoy1234 I have been listening to Trish for a few months now.  This time last year I was in a completely different head space. Trying to "get my life together" so my weeks were scattered with good habits and good intentioned but swamped with bad and destructive choices/habits. I was so in my head - I could not get out of my negative thoughts and feelings for the life of me. Trish has taught me it's not about the actions that go into "getting my life together" but the thought work behind the actions. One of my favorite lines taken from the show: "Your mind is your most valuable real estate and you decide what you build on it."  I didn't realize I actually had control of what comes in and what goes out until I started listening to Trish. When I actually started training my brain I realized she was right: it is ALL in your head, and thank God for that because I have the power! I am not a victim! God has without a doubt used her in the process of my mental healing (Also we are enneagram wing sisters, I'm a 4w4 and she's a 3w4 so that's cool). Thank you so much, Trish!   HOW TO GET OUT OF THE "CARING WHAT PEOPLE THINK" THOUGHT LOOP   Techniques:Specify the exact thought loop and the exit ramp.Give people permission to think differently than you do.Assume the best.You can pick any thought, take power back.Go for a net positive result, instead of net negative.Since we don't know what people are thinking, we can choose to think whatever we want to think. Those people who have RBF's? I used to be convinced they hated me. Now I like to assume they are just waiting for me to be friendly to them. I assume they admire my happiness, not that they're bothered by it, and even if they're bothered by it, I am okay with them not being okay with me.Some Thought Replacement Suggestions When In the...

    #454: The Courage to Believe in Possibility

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2021 31:32

      Podcast #454 The Courage to Believe in Possibility Believing that change is possible in your life, or that you can actually create a life that you love takes emotional and mental courage. Too often we short sell ourselves, our potential and our impact in this world because we aren't daring to think big enough. This podcast episode will help you understand the deeper reasons why you are holding yourself back, and, more importantly, how to start thinking differently. In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about: How to know what's possible for youHow to believe in what's actually possible and available to youHow to start seeing what you thought was impossible become possible If you truly believed you could have something in your life, you would go after it.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: You are amazing Trish, thank you!!!Sophia71411 Your podcast has given me so much hope and guidance. The cards I was dealt as a child were rough, this caused me to go into a survival mode during the years that were supposed to form me into the person I am. With that being said now I am 22 and with the guidance of God and my loved ones I have reached so many goals. But when I look in the mirror I have no idea who I am, I've never asked myself what I want or who I truly am. You are forcing me to become real and raw with myself. I am so happy I have you to help guide me in this journey of finding myself, I look forward to listening to you every day and you are truly sunshine. Thank you x 1 million!!! ((( Wiggle hugs )))   HOW TO KNOW WHAT'S ACTUALLY POSSIBLE FOR YOU:   Anything is possible.The results in your life are a reflection of the thoughts in your brain.You can achieve anything that matters enough to you.Giving yourself permission to want something takes courage.One of the hardest  questions to answer is this:What is it that you really want?You know deep down, but telling others, or admitting that you really, really want it, takes courage.Courage takes guts.It's showing up and not knowing how the outcome will be, but being willing to show up anyways.We all have it within us, but it's your choice to light up the fire within. And when you do, life unleashes.Question to think about:What have you decided isn't possible that you really want?Is it actually impossible? Why or why not?   HOW TO BELIEVE THAT POSSIBILITY IS AVAILABLE TO YOU: Let's talk about the courage to believe in possibility.Why don't we do it? Fear of disappointmentUnwillingness to be embarrassedSelf-consciousness and fixed thinkingWe think it's supposed to be easySometimes we stop ourselves because we don't yet know our future selvesWe fear it might be too much to handle What is possible when we open up to have the courage to believe in possibility?Spend time curating and befriending your future self.-I'm conversational with my 20-minute future self-I'm respectful of and excited for my 20-year future selfEnvision, describe, aspire, and try on the role so that the future version of you is more than a fantasy and is someone you can trust.  You are trustworthy of the success ahead of you, even if you don't feel capable of handling it right now.   SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.   Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed.

    #453: Why You’re Not Doing What You Want to Do

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2021 42:06

      Podcast #453 Why You're Not Doing What You Want to Do Not doing what you say you want to do is one of the most frustrating patterns that is easy to fall into and will perpetuate low self-esteem and stagnancy. Be kind to yourself though! This isn't an issue of lacking discipline, laziness or not caring - it's a belief issue, and in this episode of The Confidence Podcast you'll learn exactly what you can do to break the cycle. It's time to be a person of absolute self-integrity who always keeps their promises to themselves. In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: The 3 main reasons keeping you stuck and holding you back and resulting in your feeling like you're a person who doesn't do what you want to toHow to really decide and commit to doing what you say you want to do5 things you can do right now to start being someone who does what they say they're going to do   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Pixelover4487 Hiii - 5 stars I'm loving this podcast and I'm a guy. I struggle with anxiety and no confidence and I can't stop listening. Thank youuuuuuu.    WHY NOT DOING WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IS TOXIC It breaks your integrity with yourself.It creates an atmosphere of self-doubt and hesitation.It imposes self-limitations that actually don't exist.It convinces you that things are harder to achieve than they actually are.It sabotages your confidence and courage.It discourages you and disappoints your self-concept.It invites you to play small and justifies a "I can't help it" victim mentality    JOIN OUR BOOK SQUAD  Want to help others feel worthy and loved? Ready to Help Awaken Self-Worth in Others?  Let's do this together. I need your help to awaken our sisters in this world to their self-worth, their purpose and the truth about just how much God loves them. STRAIGHTEN YOUR CROWN is a book that breathes confidence, worth and power into the heart of the reader, helping them rediscover their identity as a daughter of God. It is a book that has the power to change your life and your relationship with the God who delights in you. As part of the Book Squad you'll receive exclusive emails and promotional resources, and access to pre-released content. You'll also get tagged when we post a shareable quote or inspiration from the book, and we invite you to support and share the ones that inspire you.   Hit the link in my bio to join the squad or go to www.trishblackwell.com/booksquad YOU HAVEN'T REALLY DECIDED TO DO IT   Sure, you think you have.But deciding to do something means that you're committed completely - anticipating the challenges, the resistance, the times when you aren't going to feel like it.You haven't created a plan for the days when it sucks. You can commit to self-doubt, or you can commit to your goal – you can't do both.The emotion of confusion is keeping you in doubt.    YOU DON'T REALLY BELIEVE YOU CAN DO IT You're burdened and bogged down by the evidence of the past and you're misinterpreting it. Instead of seeing it as an example of how not to do it, or a way you have grown and learned doesn't work, you see it as a limitation and prediction of what is possible in the future. “It's never worked out before” is the one thought that keeps us from our potential. It drags our past into our present unnecessarilyEverything in the future should be something you've never done in the pastIt's time to create and foster new belief.Belief creation comes from intentional thought creation.I have a course on this in the College of Confidence, but for now, here's what you need to know: Decide what you want to believe.Write down a thought - or list of thoughts - that bridge the way to that belief.Repeat these daily.Catch and substitute every thought that doesn't align with your new belief.Track the evidence of how you are changing on the inside out.    YOU HAVE CONVINCED YOURSELF IT WILL BE TOO HARD And therefore it doesn't feel worth the effort. It's not too hard.

    #452: Confidence For Physical Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 20, 2021 35:46

      Podcast #452 Confidence For Physical Intimacy   You're not alone in feeling insecure about how you engage and interact with others physically. But there's no reason to stay stuck in this avoidance of or minimization of physical intimacy. No matter your background with others or with yourself, you can learn how to safely and comfortably connect with yourself and others with confidence in a physical way. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/452 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: ·       Physical intimacy blocks and how your lack of confidence might be hindering your overall confidence and connection with others ·       How to have more body confidence and self-intimacy so that your physical intimacy with others - both platonically and romantically improves ·       5 techniques to proactively improve your confidence in physical intimacy in your romantic relationship   REVIEW OF THE WEEK   Holly Sexton 5-Stars, Not only and… This is the podcast for you if you need help in ANYTHING! Not only is it faith-based, and for entrepreneurs, and for moms, and for anyone dealing with diet issues, Trish hits all topics! When I don't even think I need to listen to that episode, I still get something from it!    WHAT'S BLOCKING YOUR INTIMACY?.   Past sexual trauma or abuse Distrust of others Body dysmorphia  Identity misalignment  Preferences (lots of physical touch or not)  Blocked intimacy means that you might… Avoid dating because you don't want to have to be physical Sabotage relationships to hide yourself Body shame yourself and heighten your self-critical voice to create physical change Overdrink or use substances to help you not overthink Minimize social situations where hugs or interaction make you uncomfortable Stand with guarded and closed off body language  Hinder the openness and deep intimacy of allowing yourself to be known by your spouse Undereating or protocol to allow yourself to be worthy of receiving touch Never get self-care like massages or pedicures   PHYSICAL INTIMACY WITH YOURSELF   Stretching Hugging Touching Massaging Allowing yourself to have self-care Lotion Skin care routine Intimate understanding of food that feels good on the inside Intimate conversations with yourself Challenge:  Write your future self a love note at night for the next day.  Learn to be friends with yourself means learning to come from a place of love.  Love is the most powerful emotion we can be in; it opens up our creativity, our confidence and our connection. What you feel yourself with you have to continue using - fuel with love not self-criticism. Criticism and pressure is heavy and forced, love is light, airy, easy and exciting   PLATONIC AND FAMILIAL INTIMACY   Hugs, touch. Family background. Understanding your affection preferences Communicating to others your preferences -I'm not a hugger, I love hugs, come - sit closer, etc.     ROMANTIC INTIMACY   Allowing someone to be with you fully, without numbing yourself or hiding anything, opens you to true connection and deep intimacy. You have to decide to allow yourself to be known. Physical intimacy isn't going to give you physical confidence if you don't already have it --- physical intimacy grounds your confidence and your hard wiring to connect deeply with another human being at your base level.    Methods to improve your confidence in physical intimacy:   1.     Spend more intentional time naked by yourself 2.     Thank your body for how it looks and compliment it 3.     Practice proactively escorting out negative thoughts - unwanted guests for when your mind wanders - refuse to allow your intimacy experience to be cheapened by your trash thoughts.  4.     Speak openly with your spouse and experiment with a variety of physical intimacy that isn't sexual.  5.

    #451: Black and White Thinking is Hurting Your Confidence

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2021 36:58

      Podcast #451 Black and White Thinking is Hurting Your Confidence   Black and white thinking, or all or nothing thinking, is a thought strategy often used by highly driven people that actually stunts progress, deteriorates happiness and limits potential. If you have ever described yourself as an "all or nothing" person or as a "black and white" thinker, this podcast coaching is for you. It will help you with the steps to take on how to get out of the black and white thinking loop and how to have more mental flexibility and self-kindness in the process. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/451 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: ·       How black/white and all-or-nothing thinking shows up in driven people and why we cling to it like a security blanket when it's really suffocating us ·       The process to disassociate this type of thinking from your identity ·       How to become a flexible, happy thinker   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Confidence and Wisdom - 5 Stars I am forever thankful for Trish's passion, for helping me help myself by understanding that loving myself means taking care of the thoughts I create and pay attention to on a daily basis.  Trish, I love that you see emotional self-care and self-reflection as a daily practice, much like brushing our teeth. Part of my work is with inpatient Psychiatric patients dealing with sever depression, and oftentimes I hear myself quoting your "brushing teeth" analogy to help them understand that taking care of our mental health is something that should be practiced every day, like brushing teeth. Trish, thank you for helping me find the confidence I have been searching for year, I cannot wait for what the future holds. Sincerely, Cinthya Mena, PA-C (CinthyaMena)    BLACK & WHITE THINKING / ALL-OR-NOTHING IS FOR THE BIRDS   Chances are, if you're driven, you've tapped into extreme thinking. As a result, you get results in some ways, and then get addicted to the method that you thought got you the results. But, you got the results from clean thinking - not the flawed thinking of black and white.  I held onto black and white thinking for way too long because I misidentified where my results came from, and I didn't trust myself or my natural drive. Your thoughts are what create your results in life --- not your extreme control or categorization of things. Just because you have a natural inclination or preference to think this way doesn't mean that it's hard-wired into you. :)  My black and white thinking  -kept me stuck in my eating disorder longer  -slowed my business growth with narrow focus on the "how" of the right way versus the wrong way -put me into a place of judgment of others instead of love and grace -created an internal state of self-criticism and unrealistic, non-human expectations -drove me to a place of trying to prove myself and absolute exhaustion.    How is it hurting your confidence? -Keeping you limited in a one-dimensional type of thinking? -Making you obsess about doing things a certain way? -Having unreasonable standards for others? -Driving you to extremes; pendulum of intensity vs. passivity -Convincing you to not even start? -Addicting you to external affirmation / being the best? -Plunging you into scarcity thinking and comparison? -Creating a mental atmosphere of hyper-criticism and extremism    SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP   Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor ...

    Bonus Podcast How to Create Real Change In your Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 8, 2021 17:43

    Bonus Podcast  How to Create Real Change In Your Life The second half of 2021 can be better than your first half. This podcast episode will help guarantee that you actually believe in yourself and achieve whatever you dare to dream is possible for yourself in the next 6 months. Join us July 12-16th, 2021 for CREATE CHANGE WEEK. Space is limited; this is the week that turn the rest of your year around completely. Save your spot at www.trishblackwell.com/createchange Today, we're going to project how we want to feel, and move into our goals from a place of love and confidence, not pressure and drive. Whatever fuel you use is the fuel you'll have to continue to use.  That might be why you ran out of gas halfway through the year. It's hard to keep being so driven, so focused; it feels heavy, and important, and exhausting. What if it could be easier? Think for a minute about the wildest thing you can imagine achieving in the second half of the year. And now write it out and say “I'm doing __________________ with ease and excitement. You won't run out of love to fuel your progress if you approach your goal with the confidence strategy I'll be teaching July 12-July 16 in Create Change Week.  What is a Confidence Strategy? It's a strategy of faith. Victory always comes from faith, from the belief and certainty (or confidence) in that which you cannot see.  For every child of God defeats this evil world and we achieve this victory through our faith. -1 John 5:4 Victory in all things comes from faith.    So, suspend all doubt with me for a minute. ·       What do you really want? ·       Why do you want it? ·       What has prevented you from reaching it? ·       What are you willing to do differently? When I am discouraged, and stuck in inflexible thinking, I have to force myself to remember that “nothing has gone wrong here.” The opposite is true, actually. Everything is going according to plan and I am gaining the information of what strategies aren't effective so that I can find the ones that are. Most people don't reach their goals because they don't believe they can, and since they don't believe they can, they give up too early.    It's time to believe you can. It's not just work that will take you where you want to go. It's work PLUS belief. Without belief, hard work is just hard work. Sure, you'll get some results, but not big ones. Big results come from big belief, paired with consistent, smart work. The Confidence Strategy I will be teaching July 12-July 16th will help.    Now, let's play a game. It's December 31, 2021. You've blown your own mind and achieved that thing. It's amazing. You feel amazing. What exactly are you feeling? More importantly than that, what is the thought that you think when you find out you did it? -You checked your bank account, and you've doubled your income -You verified the total amount of debt paid off, and you did it -You reflect on the new dream job you have, and you love waking up on Mondays -You step on the scale and see the number you've worked for and believed in -You finished the final paragraph on that book you've spent years talking about -You pressed publish on that website and now are seeing yourself with limitless future How is this version of you on December 31, 2021 different than the version of you right now, today? JOIN US FOR "CREATE CHANGE WEEK" July 12th-16th Create Change Week is for anyone who wants the 2nd half of 2021 to be better than the first half. Think back on your 2021 goals.  How are they going? Are you halfway there or are you off-track? That's why I created CREATE CHANGE WEEK. Do you want  -more progress on your physical transformation -more income in your business -more connection with your spouse  -more freedom from a habit that's keeping you stuck -more belief in your wildest dreams

    #450: How to Stop Feeling Awful About Yourself

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 6, 2021 38:32

      Podcast #450 How to Stop Feeling Awful About Yourself   Beating yourself up, or indulging in the emotion of feeling awful about yourself, when you're not where you want to be isn't effective. It's not a helpful thought pattern, and yet, we find ourselves in places of despair. Despair drives us to desperation, depression and disillusionment. It morphs our ability to see where we are, how well we are actually doing, and intimidates us on how far we have to yet go. This podcast episode covers how to break the cycle of self-criticism so that you can start feeling encouraged, hopeful and like you like who you are again. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/450 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: ·       Indulgent emotions, and how to know when you need to really take control of them (and how to do just that) ·       A 3-step, simple process to help you stop feeling awful about yourself, whatever the situation is ·       How to stop believing that you're stuck or will always feel this way … and some specific thought substitution examples for you to try on in your own brain   REVIEW OF THE WEEK   Awesomeness - 5 stars Hooked oof of the first episode I heard on self-criticism! Felt like she knew me personally … and she's faith based!!!  (brenelso)    INDULGENT EMOTIONS AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT THEM   Indulgent emotions are emotions that keep you stagnating in a place of self-pity and powerlessness.  For me, these emotions were  -self-hated -disappointment (most notably in myself) -disgust (most notably about my body) -hopelessness (most notably about my progress) -confusion Recognize that you are in power. You are choosing to indulge your toddler, dramatic brain. The more you indulge it, the more convincing, and a monster it becomes.  Put the toddler in the corner. Remember that you have a bigger perspective than the thought. Decide to not give into the dramatization or catastrophizing … and that all of the narratives you have created about what other people are thinking about you are just not happening.    HOW TO REALLY NOT BELIEVE YOU'RE STUCK   I've been in places of awfulness. 1.     Body dysmorphia, insecurity and eating disorder. 2.     Financial rock bottom and hopelessness / powerlessness  3.     Hustle mindset and entrepreneurial comparison. Most importantly: stand firm against the pitiful thought … "I'm stuck".  How to Not Believe You're Stuck? Believe in the compound effect. Take your thought management seriously. Credit yourself for the new tools you have. Acknowledge your dissatisfaction with stagnancy. Remember you can create anything. Success leaves clues - keep yourself inspired.  Take your commitments and plans with yourself seriously - be of integrity.    SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP   Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.   Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed. It's more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is available. Their licensed professional counselors specialize in depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflict, grief, and self-esteem. I want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you'll get 10% off your first month by visiting www...

    #448: Tips for Social Awkwardness to Help You Be Yourself

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 22, 2021 40:58

      Podcast #448 Tips for Social Awkwardness to Help You Be Yourself   Everyone experiences social awkwardness; it's what you do when you're experiencing it that determines whether or not it will mess with your confidence and with how you come off to others. This podcast episode will coach you to a place of confidence for the next time you find yourself in a socially awkward situation, wishing that you could stick your foot in your mouth, or just generally wishing you were cooler when in social situations. You are not alone, and these tips and this confidence coaching will help. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/448   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about    . Social awkwardness, and how it manifests in your life·       10 instant ways to be less awkward·       How to be yourself when you're feeling the pressure of social overthinking  You don't need to beat yourself up about being socially awkward or keep wondering how to be less awkward, here are 10 instant ways that will help you feel more confident and cool in social settings. Social awkwardness is something everyone feels, whether you feel social insecurity, you find yourself overthinking conversations, you feel like you don't have any friends, you feel like you don't fit in, you think that no one really likes you, or you find yourself putting your foot in your mouth and saying the wrong thing all the time, these confidence tips will help you chill out and feel more okay. In this episode you'll learn how to create you own social confidence and you'll get coached on how to be patient learning how to create the social life you want.    THANK YOU: PATRONS   Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:    "Confidence Boost and a God send," by laurabj1 I have been listening to your podcast for seven months now. I found you on Keep the Faith website. I saw your Detox Fear program. That helped me a lot and then I saw your podcast. Your podcast helped me with my confidence and is still helping me. It also helped me with my self esteem. I like that it's faith based too. I know God better in the last seven months, I know He is helping me still. Thanks for everything you do.    SOCIAL AWKWARDNESS: HOW IT MANIFEST IN YOUR LIFE   Simple social situations:Avoidance of themDisrupted social potentialNegative self-talk and insecurity (lack of belonging)Disengagement from confident body languageComes off as disinterested in others or RBFIntense feelings of anxiety of fear in social situationsIntimidation and fear of speaking to another personRambling conversations - unable to stop talkingOverdrinking or overeating or over-scrolling Obsessing over every word that comes out of your mouth Relationships and FriendshipsAvoidance of conflictLack of depthPerpetuation of people pleasingSocial overthinkingPeer pressure Obsessing over every conversation you haveFeeling like you are being judged during conversationsNot pursuing expressing yourself or your interestsLack of meaningful conversations with others   10 INSTANT WAYS TO BE LESS AWKWARD   1.     Stand with confidence.2.     Walk with confidence.3.     Make eye contact.4.     Own your space.5.     Say hello.6.     Start conversations and be interested in people.7.     Leave when you want.8.     Know what you bring. (Know yourself; do you bring humor, a listening ear, etc.)9.     Be yourself.10.  Remember that everyone is awkward.  Face awkwardness head on.Practice interacting with others.Put yourself in situations to stretch your comfort zone. Play around with your voice inflections, and your transition statements.

    #447: Career Confidence: How to Have More of It, No Matter What Type of Work You Do

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2021 29:08

      Podcast #447 Career Confidence: How to Have More of It, No Matter What Type of Work You Do   How you think about your work directly impacts the confidence with which you show up for it. The more career confidence you have, the more opportunities you will create. The reality is that most of us feel stuck, dissatisfied or overwhelmed with work and end up not showing up as our best selves. Your work takes of 1/3 of your life, the level of confidence you have in it has a profound effect on the confidence you carry into other areas of your life. This episode will boost your career confidence, whatever type of career you have. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/447   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about:    ·       The reasons we struggle with confidence in the workplace ·       The key to career confidence, whether you work a 9-5, own a company, are a stay-at-home mom, or have your own online brand ·       10 ways you can appear to be the most confident people in your field   REVIEW OF THE WEEK   Djosephine - 5stars Trish speaks to my soul! In every podcast, she says something that resonates with me that I have to pause the show and reflect. I always walk away from her podcasts filled with positivity and encouragement. I highly recommend her podcast.     REASONS WE STRUGGLE WITH CONFIDENCE IN THE WORKPLACE   Traditional Careers: We wait to be discovered. We label environments "toxic" too quickly and don't manage our minds. We settle for less than what we want. We get pulled into complaint culture. We buy into the separation of departments and forget the value we bring. We don't commit to being the best employee in the building. We forget to ask for what we want. We play smaller than we need to. We care too much what people think. We second-guess our career choice and live in the past. We fantasize about other workplaces and companies. We don't ask for new opportunity or increased pay.  We think we can't be ourselves. We want the group to like us and we get distracted by things that don't matter.  We lose sight of the value of the work we do, even if in thankless or unnoticed tasks.  We allow self-pity to keep our attitudes from being excellent.  Entrepreneur Careers: We try to copy what everyone else is doing. We put too much attention in social media instead of email nurturing. We obsess over the product instead of mastering the offer. We personalize rejection and want success to be easy. We compare our step 10 with someone else's step 100. We measure our worth by our income and get too in the weeds of the numbers. We don't set our beliefs with focused intention. We aren't hyper-focused on creating change for our customers - it becomes too much about us. We get distracted by new courses, strategies and learning. We see the green grass of other methods and forget to water our own. We think of our industry as competition instead of proof of concept. We get small-minded and scarcity-focused (there are more than enough people to serve) We are afraid to charge for the result we offer people. We pretend to be perfect and are afraid of being human / real.  We put too much emphasis on our website / looks instead of on creating connection. We believe the vanity metrics of other people's success. We haven't actually set work hours and boundaries. We don't really even know what "success" means to us. We go it on our own, without a coach.    THE KEY TO CAREER CONFIDENCE   Have joy in how you contribute through what you do and how you grow daily in the process of doing the ordinary in extraordinary ways. Every life shift begins with a mind shift --- > lift your mind to carry yourself with more confidence and commitment in your work, and your career will open opportunities you didn't even know were there.  Contribution: gives purpose.

    #446: How to Find Yourself and Your Confidence 

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 8, 2021 40:08

    Podcast #446 How To Find Yourself and Your Confidence The need to find yourself, to figure yourself out, to learn to love yourself and how to figure out who you are is part of the journey of being a human committed to self-improvement and positive personal development. This video will teach you how to find yourself again when you feel lost, how to find yourself and redefine yourself after a relationship and how to become the person you want to be in the process. You'll learn 3 simple ways to rediscover who you are, how to know who you are, how to like yourself and how losing yourself will actually help you really find yourself.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're talking about:  ·       How to rediscover who you are if you feel lost, uncertain or rock bottom ·       10 reflective questions to help you figure out who you really are ·       How to get an aerial view and understanding of where you are and where you want to go ·       3 strategies on how to start the process of finding yourself again   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Hi Ms. Blackwell - I connected to you on Instagram because I regularly listen to The Confidence Podcast on Google for post of the last year. I know you say at the beginning of each episode that it's made to help women, but your messages have been helping me immensely in my goal of being confident in myself and I thank you for being part of the journey.  A thousand thank you's for helping to create the roadmap in my journey to define the person that I want to become.  Michael   ASK CHALLENGE - 30 DAYS OF ASKING   The Art of Asking.  Buckle up for a month of coaching that will scale your confidence for sure! June is "Ask Month." Yep, together, we are going to master the art of asking. Because, remember, you don't get in life what you hope for, or even what you deserve, you get what you are confident enough to ask for.  This applies even in your own self-asking and self-reflection. How you ask yourself what you want from life will determine how you design your life and ultimately live it out. Asking is a powerful thing, but too many of us tip-toe around it. And we end up missing out on what is actually available to us. I'll be doing some spot coaching throughout the month on the "art of asking," and will be doing it in multiple contexts - relationships, financial, career, sales, and more. Get excited because the more you practice asking, the better you will be at it. Together, we're practicing 30-Days of Asking with our 30-Day Ask Challenge. Get involved at www.collegeofconfidence.com First: know this: you are not stuck where you are standing.  WHERE ARE YOU, HOW DID YOU GET HERE, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO?   I.         When did you lose yourself?  II.         Who's voice got you lost?  III.         What narrative have you used to keep yourself there?   10 Questions to Help You Figure Out Who You Are 1.     What do people often tell me about me? 2.     What things do I enjoy doing? 3.     What interests capture my curiosity?  4.     Who am I not? 5.     Who do I want to be? 6.     How do I want to be remembered?  7.     What difference do I want to make with my life in this world?  8.     What is the best compliment people could ever say about me? 9.     What type of work makes my heart come alive? 10.  If I could create anything with my life, what would that be?    5 Resources in the College of Confidence on this topic 1.     How to Know Your Purpose 2.     How to Know Who You Are and What You Want 3.     Getting Beyond Overwhelm  4.     Transforming Your Trials into Triumphs 5.     How to Train Your Thoughts The framework of confidence --- simple and accessible --- take my new course. How to Exude Confidence. It's free. And it's for you. (Don't worry, are you already a COC member, this course is now posted in our Courses section for your instant access as well).

    #445: Talking Back to Your “What If’s”

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2021 40:18

    Podcast #445 Talking Back to Your "What If's" If you have ever worried about backsliding in life, things not working out or that the good things in your life are too good to be true, this podcast episode is for you. In it you'll learn the how to talk back to your "what if's" and how to stay positive about being able to design your life, trust God's goodness and look at life as an adventure to be explored.   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:   ·       What your "what if's" are really saying about your thoughts ·       How to reframe your negative and fearful "what if's" into positive and powerful ones ·       Intentional thought creation and belief curation and affirmation ·       How to trust what you've learned and how you have grown ·       Believing in the decisions you make and have made   ANNOUNCEMENT   The Art of Asking.  Buckle up for a month of coaching that will scale your confidence for sure! June is "Ask Month." Yep, together, we are going to master the art of asking. Because, remember, you don't get in life what you hope for, or even what you deserve, you get what you are confident enough to ask for.  This applies even in your own self-asking and self-reflection. How you ask yourself what you want from life will determine how you design your life and ultimately live it out. Asking is a powerful thing, but too many of us tip-toe around it. And we end up missing out on what is actually available to us. I'll be doing some spot coaching throughout the month on the "art of asking," and will be doing it in multiple contexts - relationships, financial, career, sales, and more. Get excited because the more you practice asking, the better you will be at it. Together, we're practicing 30-Days of Asking with our 30-Day Ask Challenge. Get involved at www.collegeofconfidence.com   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Absolutely Love It - 5 Stars, by lizardexum Trish's podcast is the best addition to my day. I found myself falling in love with her podcasts after the first 5 minutes with her inviting attitude and love for Jesus. Since then I have binge listened to so many of her episodes. They bring me so much joy and have helped in my own struggles with confidence. I recommend this podcast to anyone looing for a dose of confidence or just something to brighten their day.    STEP ONE: Reframe the "what if" into what it really is > a direct, fearful thought.   1.     Turn the what if into a thought. 2.     Ask yourself if that thought serves you. 3.     Pick a new thought that you want to make serve you instead.  Let's play a game of "positive what if's." How does it work, you ask? For every negative "what if" is holding you back, I want you to pause, and write down the ultimate positive example of what COULD happen. I'm talking, best-case-scenario, most optimistic, intentional thought belief you can think. Most of the time our negative "what ifs" are costing us more than we possibly realize. It's time to break the pattern.  So tell me, how are you going to turn a negative "what if" into a positive one today?   Samples:   What if this doesn't work? = This might not work. What if I can't keep this up? = I don't think I can do this. What if I go back to how I used to be? = I don't really believe I have changed. What if no one reads my book? = What I say doesn't matter. What if they hurt me? = I want to avoid all possibility of any negative pain.  What if I end up alone? = No one really enjoys me and I might never really connect with others.   STEP TWO:  Affirm that everything is actually working.   1.     Quit convincing yourself that worry works - it's a time waste and you do have power over it.  2.     Practice your intentional thought creation and belief curation. 3.     Commit to unwaveringly believing until you see.  4.     Remember - it's actually perceived to be "safer" to prepare ourselves ...

    #444: Healing Your Confidence After Abuse or Trauma  

    Play Episode Listen Later May 25, 2021 52:21

      Podcast #444 Healing Your Confidence After Abuse or Trauma Healing your confidence after abuse or trauma is something not often talked about, but widely needed. If you have experienced abuse or trauma, and your confidence can be rebuilt. Reestablishing a new self-concept, healthy boundaries and new thoughts about yourself and about those you can or cannot trust in your life will take time, but will change your life for the better. This episode shares some effective tools that will help you in the process. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/444   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're chatting about: ·       How to reestablish confidence in yourself when you feel like a shell of a person·       What tools helped me find myself again and trust after abuse and trauma·       The key to creating joy and trust in your future relationships   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Thank you Trish - 5 stars, DaisieH I came across this podcast a couple months ago and I listen to about 5 a week now. I needed a good confidence boost so I searched "confidence" and am so grateful to have found your podcast. I newly struggle with breakouts and it's crazy because I can be confident in every part of me but when I experience a bad breakout, my confidence goes down in every aspect. You have helped me because now I do things like look in the mirror and smile, and focus on the thing I do like instead of the things I don’t. You have also helped me to renew my relationship with God which I desperately needed. Thank you for your encouraging words and I love your soothing voice. Also the ones where you talk to your daughter as so adorable and she's so lucky to have a mom with your words of wisdom. Thank you for what you do. Your book is on my books to read list. :)    THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   HEALING YOUR CONFIDENCE AFTER ABUSE OR TRAUMA IS POSSIBLE Listener topic request:  Would you be able to do an episode on your past abusive relationship and what you learned from how you healed and the joy you have in your relationship with Brandon now? (Rachel)  I've been a listener of The Confidence Podcast for about a year now, and you have no idea how much your words have positively impacted my self esteem. I always look forward to Tuesdays when I get to hear the radiant message you get to share with the world. As a graduate student, I easily let my self-worth depend on my work or school-related accomplishments, and your podcast has helped me realize that I am worthy because of WHO I am, regardless of WHAT I do. I am working on my self confidence every day, and building my sense of self piece by piece. Thank you for all that you do! You are such a light in my life.   TOOLS THAT REBUILT MY CONFIDENCE AFTER ABUSE o   The Nick and Joanie Experience (Take the challenge yourself - listen to episode #431: How to See Yourself Differently Than You Do) o   Victim vs. Victorious.  o   Coaching and Personal Development    TOOLS THE REBUILT MY CONFIDENCE AFTER TRAUMA  1.     Therapy. > Supportive space to bring the darkness into the light.  2.     Writing. > Prayers, Journals, Books.  3.     Kindness. > Self-compassion.  4.     EMDR. > The courage to relive and process the trauma. 5.     Boundaries. > Mental and physical standards for myself 6.     Decisions. > Intentional thought creation.   THE KEY TO CREATING JOY AND TRUST IN YOUR FUTURE RELATIONSHIPS 1.     I decided to believe that there are good people. 2.     I decided to be emotionally courageous and open. 3.     I decided to communicate fully. 4.

    #443: How to Be Happy About Aging 

    Play Episode Listen Later May 18, 2021 33:22

      Podcast #443 How to Be Happy About Aging Positive aging and pro-age confidence is an important element of self-confidence that everyone should work on, no matter what age they are. Aging is an inevitable part of the journey of life, but it doesn't have to be negative, as so much of culture and society tries to convince us that it is. This podcast episode explores the relationship between your thoughts about aging and actually aging with more confidence and beauty, and how to start liking yourself right now at the age that you are. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/443   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we're chatting about: ·       How to be happy about aging --- believing your life will improve as you go ·       10 reasons I'm thankful to be turning one year older … and the last chance birthday gift I have from me to you ·       My favorite positive aging / pro-aging affirmations that you can steal from me    REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Totally Needed! -Tish Marie I received a text from another famous entrepreneur and he is a guy and I just clicked his link and accidentally hit Trish's podcast. I stopped listening to him and didn't finish and OMG her message what was I needed and hooked me!  PRE-ORDER BOOK ANNOUNCEMENT!!! Straighten Your Crown   REDISCOVERING THAT YOU ARE SEEN, YOU MATTER   AND THE KING DELIGHTS IN YOU   Here's what you'll discover as you read Straighten Your Crown: ·       Why you've struggled with believing in your worthiness … and no, it's not because you aren't at the weight you want! ·       Why it's absolutely possible to stop playing small with your life even if you still struggle with self-doubt and direction. ·       How to start seeing God show up in your daily life - and how He doesn't simply love you, but rather deeply delights in the details of your day. ·       An eye-opening journey into seeing God's delight for you express itself in the unlikeliest of places, even in heartache, suffering, anxiety and places that feel like dead ends in your life.  ·       How to live with more confidence, peace, power and joy, really believing that you are a daughter of the King of Kings, and how this plays out in your real day-to-day life.  ·       Why you're stuck in the cycle of perfectionism, proving yourself and stress, and how to let go, stop striving and really own the identity of being a worthy, perfectly loved child of God. THINK YOU'RE NOT CAPABLE OF BEING CONFIDENT? This Book Will Teach You How. It starts with actually believing that God loves you. And that you have purpose. Order the book. Read it. Listen to it. And then ditch the self-doubt and go be light in this world. Preorder now at www.trishblackwell.com/book or www.trishblackwell.com/preorder ________________________ Here's what you need to know:                     I.         If you pre-order now, you'll get a free audiobook copy.                    II.         If you pre-order 3+ copies, you'll get an invite to my A Walk in Worthiness Workshop                  III.         If you are on fire about this book, join my book squad and help us get this book into the hands of more people --- plus get some more goodies from me, including a live Q&A and some behind the scenes of the writing process. Join the book squad at www.trishblackwell.com/booksquad   Y'ALL. AGING IS GOOD. THE BEST IS YET TO COME BECAUSE YOU'RE TRAINING YOUR BRAIN.              I.         Happy 38th birthday to me. :)                     II.         Aging affirmations                    III.         Youthful spirit determines the outlay of your life Take care of your body and your mind now, so that you age well and with the ability to live life to the fullest. For years I wanted to care for my body simply to look how I wanted to look - but about ten years ago I shifted my purpose --- to care for my body so that I can be a 7...

    #442: 100 Journaling Prompts and Questions to Boost Your Self-Esteem and Confidence

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2021 36:17

      Podcast #442 100 Journaling Prompts and Questions to Boost Your Self-Esteem and Confidence The practice of journaling, when done correctly, can change your life. Most people journal haphazardly or sporadically, and therefore don't get the mental breakthroughs and life-change that is possible. If you've ever struggled with knowing what to journal, how to do it, where to start or just feel burnt out on inspiration, this podcast episode with 100 journaling prompts for your self-esteem and confidence is for you. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/442     In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're coaching on: How to journal and make it a disciplined part of your thought lifeThe difference between deciding and hoping, and how to use your journal to create winning thoughtsMy best journaling prompts to inspire breakthroughs for your self-esteem and confidence   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Thank you for all your advice! 5-Stars, Lizz1689 I have been caught up in always trying to make others happy and people-pleasing. Always saying yes and having to over-explain my no's. I came across your podcasts about 2 weeks ago after searching "confidence." So far I have listened to podcasts #187, 189, 359, 261, 402,219, 421, 423, 433, 435, and 436. I am trying to learn that I do not have to have it all together and that I don't owe anyone anything. It's okay to not be liked by everyone.  NEW FREE CLASS: How to Stop Worrying About Disappointing People Grab your spot >>> www.trishblackwell.com/disappointment THE POWER OF JOURNALING Journaling has the power to change your thoughts, and therefore your self-esteem and your confidence. The act of journaling can change how you see yourself and how you see your life. So why doesn't everyone do it? Because sometimes staring at a blank page of paper can leave you intimidated and not knowing what to write. Enter: journaling prompts. Specifically, journaling prompts for self-esteem and self-confidence. When you journal, the act of taking a thought and putting it onto paper gives you the ability to really see it and examine it. This process neutralizes the thought from any extra emotions, or judgment it might be carrying and gives you the power to decide what to do with the thought. You can choose to keep the thought, to re-write, or rewire the thought to be similar, but more positive, or to push the thought away and uninvite it into your brain.  The act of taking pen to paper is perhaps the most life-giving foundational strategy for anyone who wants to master their mindset. Another way to think about the above described process of journaling is that the act of journaling is like breathing for your brain. What you put on paper is an exhale of what's cluttering your mind, and what you write down in return, your compassionate responses and your guided new thoughts, is an act of inhalation.  There is no need to ever feel intimidated by a blank paper, but it's natural that there will be days when you just need a little inspirational boost to get your journaling juices started. (If you are looking for a daily journaling structure, click here to learn my 8-minute journaling method.) Journal prompts are like little superheroes to supercharge your mind to open up and explore the deeper level of your thoughts. The more you can see your thoughts, the more you will be able to understand them. The more you understand them, the more you will be able to manage and direct them. The more you train your ability to direct your thoughts, the more you will master your mindset and have powe...

    #440: Why Overthinking is Worse for You Than You Think and How to Change 

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2021 34:38


      Podcast #440 Why Overthinking is Worse for You Than You Think and How to Change   Overthinking is worse for you than you think it is because it creates problems that aren't even there and keeps you stuck in place when you could be moving forward. If you have ever struggled with overthinking, whether it's ruminating on your past or worrying about your future, this podcast episode is for you and will give you 8 very practical ways to change your patterns. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/440 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're coaching on… ·       Why overthinking happens ·       What overthinking is doing to you ·       How to stop the habit of overthinking and start trusting yourself with powerful thoughts   THANK YOU: PATRONS   Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Awesomeness. 5-Stars Hooked off the first episode I heard on self-criticism! Felt like she knew me personally … and she's faith based!!!    WHY OVERTHINKING HAPPENS   Lack of self-trust Lack of decisiveness Lack of known purpose Lack of prioritization Lack of time management Lack of confidence Lack of boundaries (too many inputs, too many decisions) WHY IT'S WORSE FOR YOU THAN YOU THINK   It teaches you to stay stuck. It makes you believe you can 100% be certain. It makes you miss the boat. It keeps you in fear, not faith. It causes you to second-guess yourself. It makes you a whim to your whims. It reinforces your lack of self-trust. It creates paralysis by analysis.  Overthinking is best known as creating problems that are not even there.   QUOTES ON OVERTHINKING:   Rule number one is, don't sweat the small stuff. Rule number two is, it's all small stuff. -Robert Eliot·       Don't get too deep, it leads to over thinking, and over thinking leads to problems that don't even exist in the first place. -Jayson Engay·       You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. -Martin Luther King Jr.·       Worrying about how things will go doesn't help make the things go right.  Here’s an analogy I like: Overthinking is like using a chainsaw to cut out pictures for a scrapbook. Even though it’s an incredibly powerful tool, there are many times when it’s not useful and even makes things worse.https://nickwignall.com/overthinking/  What does your overthinking look like? -Ruminating on the past-Worrying about the future Reliving embarrassing moments in your head repeatedly?Imagining that someone doesn't like you or thinks less of you? Getting stuck in the "what if's" of life in your mind too much?Tossing and turning at night because you can't stop thinking? Reliving your mistakesRehashing or replaying conversationsDepressive ruminationAngry rumination    HOW TO CHANGE   1.     Schedule time to worry / or a future thinking date 2.     Write your thoughts out and compassionately write back. 3.     Identify the actual emotions behind the overthinking  4.     Be aware of your excessive emotional reactions (cognitive distortions and extreme statements, labels, etc.) 5.     Stop identifying as just how you are 6.     Go silent. (More prayer, more meditation, more visualization, less noise and scroll) 7.     Practice micro-decisiveness 8.     Do 10-minute worry appointments.  Remember, overthinking will lose its power and place in your life when you learn to be more decisive. Decisiveness reduces overthinking.    ANNOUNCEMENTS:   My life changed forever the first time I invested in a mastermind coaching experience. To be honest, I was scared.


    #439: How to Believe You’re Good Enough Even When You Keep Getting Rejected

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2021 34:58

      Podcast #439 How To Believe You're Good Enough Even When You Keep Getting Rejected In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're coaching on… ·       The sinking mud pit of "not good enough" and how to get out of it·       How to reframe rejections and not personalize them but be powered by them·       My favorite affirmations to deepen your belief grooves that you are good enough  THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK Confident and Capable, 5-Stars by Emily C :) Rewind about 9 months when my friend first introduced me to your podcast. I was an over apologizer. I would say sorry at EVERYTHING. My friends at one point would literally pinch me when I said it unnecessarily to try to get me to stop. (I didn't even have the confidence to tell them to stop). To be fair, it would work temporarily but I always reverted back. I would listen to your podcast occasionally and I really resonated with a lot of the things you were saying. It wasn't until recently when things really started to click and I started to put more effort into myself.  I've started allowing myself to take up space and have an opinion. I'm setting boundaries and speaking up for myself, and most importantly, I'm not apologizing for it. In one of your more recent episodes you talked about going back to undo your laundry or untying your toes. I now try to take that little thought with me everywhere. I say to myself "respect yourself' and set myself up for greatness. I've always loved making other people's lives easier and now I valued myself enough to make my own life easier and greater. I feel more respected and confident and I know that I am capable of hard things. This podcast has helped me achieve those things and I hope it find its way to those who need a reminder that it's okay to take up space and be confident doing it.  You've helped me change my life. I know there's still work to do but I'm confident I can do it. Thank you.    THE SINKING PIT OF "NOT GOOD ENOUGH" Not being good enough is a belief that you're flawed, mistaken, behind or constantly messing up. The overwhelm of how inferior you are to what you should be doing creates deep internal stress, personal disappointment and un-specifically identified shame, embarrassment or sadness.  It starts with a thought, and the thought snowballs more and more.Typically that first thought is a comparative one.  It's worry that we aren't what people were expecting, that we aren't worthy of being remembered, that we disappointments because others can do something better or more efficiently than us.  Always feeling like you're the one who doesn't belong or who can't keep up.Always in a state of self-pity, believing the story that everyone has it easier than you and that you have to work extra hard to just be whatever baseline of "enough" that you can manage. You're not good enough.You're not pretty enough.You're not smart enough.You're not successful enough.You're not funny enough.You're not engaging enough.You're not skinny enough.You're not doing enough.  Even though it's a desire on your part to feel good enough for yourself, the problem is that our measurement of "enough" is based and biased by external feedback and affirmation that we are seeking --- feedback that is opinion based, which means fickle, fleeting and ever-changing. I realized that this voice was growing in my life the more I tried to prove myself or look a certain way on the outside to people's opinions. The more attached I got to trying to make people impressed with me, the more behind in life, and not good enough I felt.  Podcast Suggestions:How to Be Your Own Validation...

    #438: The Fear of Disappointment and How to Move Past It 

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2021 38:12

    Podcast #438 The Fear of Disappointment and How to Move Past It   The fear of disappointment can keep you playing it safe and staying small on the sidelines of life. You may think you're protecting yourself or being realistic, but really all you are doing is guaranteeing that your life as a whole will be less than you were created for, and that's disappointing. Disappointment is part of being human, and when you learn how to feel through your disappointments, they end up being tools to deepen your confidence, hone your drive and leverage what really matters the most. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/438   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're diving deep into disappointment, specifically:   The relationship of disappointment to self-criticismHow to process and feel disappointmentThe key to moving past it for good - and not being held back by the fear of it in your life   THANK YOU: PATRONS   Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   ALWAYS something to learn from Trish! 5-Stars, by Jen Zumbiel I find myself in aw that Trish has 400+ episodes all on the same topic-  confidence. But every single time I am also amazed that she finds something new to speak to me about at just the right time I need to hear it. Trish is a force of good in a world that needs more people standing up in this virtue.   HOW DOES DISAPPOINTMENT DESTROY OUR CONFIDENCE?   Let's talk briefly about the relationship with disappointment, our fear of disappointment and self-criticism.  -Disappointment in ourselves -Disappointment in others -Disappointment in how our lives have panned out -Disappointment in choices Or even, the fear of -Thinking you’re a disappointment -Being told you are a disappointing -The classic, "I'm not mad at you, I'm just disappointed" -Telling yourself that you've disappointed God  Disappointment seems to sting deep in our character, burning us at the core of our identity where it hurts the most. But we are separate from our disappointments, and our disappointments can't and shouldn't hold us back from living fully. I paused many years of my life because of disappointment. I thought by trying to control more things, play it safe, set smaller - more controllable goals, not get my hopes up, etc that I was protecting myself from emotions I didn't think "I could handle." First - I didn't know that I can handle anything. Maybe you don't know that either. But it's true, you can.Second - I protected myself, that's for sure, but from a full, fulfilling and impact-making life. Third - Disappointment is part of being human; it's not something avoidable, either you let it make you miss out, or you embrace being willing to feel your feelings and move through them.    THE FEAR OF DISAPPOINTMENT   Quotes on Disappointment: Disappointment opens our hearts to know what we really care about. Don't worry about the perceived closed door, focus instead on the open heart. More opportunity will come.  -Trish Blackwell We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain or regret or disappointment. –Jim Rohn The principles of living greatly include the capacity to face trouble with courage, disappointment with cheerfulness, and trail with humility. –Thomas S Monson If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment. –Henry David Thoreau Fear of disappointment is a false sense of control and a disillusioned belief that we can avoid a basic human emotion.   YES, I HAVE A NEW BOOK COMING OUT.    It's called Straighten Your Crown: You're a Daughter of the...

    #437: Friends, How Many Should You Have

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 6, 2021 48:37

    Podcast #437 Friends, How Many Should You Have   Friendships matter, but in a pandemic and post-pandemic world, we are more disconnected than ever. If you've ever wondered how many friends you should have, how to have better friendships or how to create life-long friends with confidence, then this coaching podcast is for you. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/437In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  Loneliness and how to fight against its pervasiveness in a pandemic and post-pandemic societyThe questions about friendship that you've always wanted to know the answers toHow to reframe your natural friendship nature to be positive and powerful 7 keys to creating good friendships   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:    Thank you Trish!!! 5-Stars, by Lemons&Love Like so many other listeners, I think God so led me to your podcast! Like literally this podcast has been an answer to a prayer! Your episode have become a crucial part of my everyday and I relisten to some key episode for me especially when I find myself in my head and overthinking things! Thank you for doing this and being so authentic.    LONELINESS AND HOW TO DECREASE IT IN YOUR LIFE   What feeling lonely and disconnected does to us: It isolates. Isolation defeats us, discourages us and makes us open for wounding. It victimizes us. Us vs. them.It convinces us that everyone has it easier. We feel misunderstood. Resources mentioned on loneliness: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/01/23/798676465/most-americans-are-lonely-and-our-workplace-culture-may-not-be-helpinghttps://www.cdc.gov/aging/publications/features/lonely-older-adults.htmlhttps://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/the-facts-on-loneliness/   SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP   Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You’ll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.   Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed. It’s more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is available. Their licensed professional counselors specialize in depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflict, grief, and self-esteem. I want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting www.betterhelp.com/confidencepod   HOW MANY FRIENDS SHOULD YOU HAVE, AND OTHER COMMON QUESTIONS   -How many do you need and how many should you have? -How to deal with conflict within friendships or friend groups? -How to feel known and understand when you feel disconnected? -How to be a good friend and find good friends? -How to have confidence in your future friendships? -How to heal from past hurts friendships have caused? -How to know which friendships are toxic for you? Friends for a season, friends for a reason, friends for life. Release friendships with gratitude, MariKondi styleLack of interaction doesn't mean lack of love or careRealistic expectations of inner circle needs and the tribe you want in your life Other questions that are very common:  Does longing for more friends make me a loser? Why do I attract selfish friends?  How come everyone else seems to have a "group" and I don't? Why do I feel so socially awkward all the time? Is it possible to find friends who accept you for who you are?  REFRAMING YOUR GIFT OF FRIENDSHIP

    #436: How Not to Care: Detaching from People’s Opinions of You 

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2021 39:23

      Podcast #436 How Not To Care: Detaching From People's Opinions of You Learning how not to care too much about what people think is possible, when you learn how to master your mindset and train your thoughts. This podcast episode will teach you how to detach from people's opinions of you, how to be free from all of the "what if's" that keep us looped into playing small with our lives, and the side effects of being a people pleaser or simply trying to be liked by everyone. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/436   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  Why we care so much and what it's doing to usHow to not care: 15 things to remember5 mindset shifts to help you detach from other people's opinions    REVIEW OF THE WEEK:  Equipped and Prepared to Thrive, 5-Stars by MotherofGrace Trish's work has helped me in so many ways to clean up my stinkin' thinkin'. I am now lighter and less anxious because of the tools I have learned through her podcast and YouTube videos.  I am a big fan of using her methods of parenting my negative thoughts. It is so simple and massively effective.  Thank you, Trish, for all of the wisdom you bring! You are a blessing!    THE OVERCARING LOOP I am someone who cares a lot. Inherently, that's a good thing. But it can be unhealthy too. I had to learn how to not care, especially how to not care about what people thought of me. Detaching yourself from other people's opinions can be hard, because chances are, you're like me and have trained for brain for years, if not decades, to attach your worth, acceptance and security to these opinions. My swim coaches used to try to get me to stop caring so much by telling me to just not care. They also told me I tried to hard, and to just "try to stop trying so hard." Ya'll. I found myself in a loop that I couldn't get out of.   "Trying to stop trying." "Keep caring, but don't care too much." It felt like I was trying to solve a riddle that had no answer. But then I figured out a new way to approach it: I had to learn to stop holding on so tightly to the false sense of control I got from all the caring and all the trying. And ya'll, it works. You deserve the freedom that comes from the tools I share on this podcast episode. I can't wait to hear what you think!   WHY WE CARE SO MUCH AND WHAT IT'S DOING TO US Raised conformists.The traditional path seems the safest.We're tribal and need people.We've attributed too much power to others.We haven't taken the time to be our own validation voice (#433)Conflict scares usWeird is twisted Maybe you don't resonate with being a people pleaser, but maybe it's simply manifested differently, through wanting to be cool - to be influential, to be well-liked, to be included, to be powerful, to be a leader, to be popular. It boxes us in. It labels us. It makes us beat ourselves up. It incites the voice of self-criticism.  I used to be the queen of beating myself up. Self-critical? Perfectionist? Yep. But I would just word it differently, like "Oh, I'm just tough on myself," and I thought it was okay, but it wasn't.  To be honest, it was such a daily part of my life and in how I thought about myself and the world that I didn't think there was any other way.   I was happy on the outside, but anxious, disappointed and always stressed on the inside. Beating yourself up all the time bruises you from the inside out. You can't always see the wounds, but they are there and they handicap you in a painful way. It leads to overthinking, impersonation, playing small, tip-toing, self-doubt and the jerk-brain. Haven't listened to episode #433, How to Be Your Own Validation Voice? Click here to listen: www.trishblackwell.com/433   HOW TO NOT CARE SO MUCH Remember no one is thinking about you as much as you think they are.Remember that everyone is weird. Remember that controlling opinions is like catching the wind.

    #435: How to Change that Habit that’s Keeping You Stuck

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2021 44:51

      Podcast #435 How To Change that Habit that's Keeping You Stuck Do you want to change a habit that is keeping you stuck? This podcast episode is for you. In it, you'll learn why you have had a hard time breaking the habit and how to approach habit change with more confidence, and success. It all starts with getting honest about the habits you need to change, then setting new standards of realistic expectations for yourself, and then mastering the self-talk that will subconsciously get you to show up more consistently for yourself. These changes will make you proud of yourself, and will help you change the quality of your habits and life.  In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  How to set new standards for yourself in a way that really worksThe key to creating a new self-concept so that you rise up and change your habits naturallyBreaking down the process of habit substitution so that you can really change a habit that's keep you stuck   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:      WHEW. Let's start with some honesty.   Here are some habits that I spent far too many years stuck in. Compulsive, obsessive calorie counting. Excessive exercise. Binge eating. Overeating. Emotional Eating. Overpouring wine at night. Slopping nighttime routine. Mismanaged morning routine. Stress and busyness. Workaholism.  Self-pity and scarcity mindset - life is hard concept. Settling for relationships and friendships that tore me down instead of building me up.  Wanting to read my Bible more and do more meditation, but never doing it.  So much about our habits is a reflection of what's going on in the inside: -Who do we think we are? -What do we think of ourselves and our worth? -What do we do to manage and work through our feelings? -What are the things we tell ourselves? -What is it that we actually believe?    NEW STANDARDS Have you considered or ever written down your standards? What standards do you hold yourself to? I hadn't done this as an adult - only did it in college on sports teams or classes. This is different than "Oh, I'm hard on myself because I have high standards for myself" -that's lazy unrealistic perfectionistic fantasy and day dreaming   NEW SELF-CONCEPT You have to see yourself as a new you.  You are not your habit. You are not suck. You are capable of change.  Create a line in the sand between the old you, and the new you.    To release your old self-concept, and old habits that went with it, you have to forgive yourself for it. -Take ownership and be honest. Call it what it was. (binge drinking, binge eating, compulsive shopping, escapism, etc.) -Describe the darkness and the state that you created for yourself -Give thanks for the firsthand experience - experience is the best lesson -Look at the time wasted as fuel in your fire to maximize all future life opportunities; now more than ever you have a more authentic desire to put life into your years -Nothing is wasted when you are growth mindset oriented   Visualize the self-concept of you that easily executes things at a newer, higher, more confident and masterful level.  -Find examples to emulate -Refuse to sink in self-pity (or "this is hard" talk) -Break the ceiling of previous possibilities   HABIT SUBSTITUTION Habit replacement. Not elimination.Micro-Habits.Cheer yourself on. Study evidence of people with sustained habits.Change your brain, one thought at a time.  You can learn how to make your brain work for you, not against you. And that's exactly what I'll be teaching in my upcoming mastermind, Done with Numb.   DONE WITH NUMB MASTERMIND READY TO CHANGE HABITS? CHECK OUT MY NEW MASTERMIND: Applications are open.   Who is Done with Numb for? You do more than most people but you never feel like you're doing enough. You always feel like you should be doing more, but there's not enough time.

    #434: How to Use Sleep to Skyrocket Your Confidence

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2021 42:52

      Podcast #434 How To Use Sleep To Skyrocket Your Confidence In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  The kindness of simply letting yourself be human, and how to hear yourself when you need to rest … and we're talking about sleep hygiene and sleep anxietyThe mind-blowing change that happens when you make the shift of giving yourself the sleep you need, and what to do if you aren't getting it The #Last90Minutes Routine and how it can change your life and raise your standards   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: One of my top favorite podcasts... seriously! I’ve been listening to this podcast forever and was sad that I couldn’t leave a review because I listen on Spotify... turns out I can! Trish is so positive and uplifting. Her advice on changing your mindset is so motivating, and it makes it even better that she is a Christian and encourages us with her faith at the same time. It’s impossible to be in a bad mood after listening to one of Trish’s podcast episodes! -carlyyrenee   INVITE: NIGHTTIME ROUTINE CHALLENGE WEEK:   You've heard of the miracle morning, but what about the miracle evening? It's all happening behind the walls of The College of Confidence, and YOU'RE invited to join the challenge for just $1!  It's not too late to join us. We started yesterday ---- but the challenge is going on and you'll get full access when you join, PLUS you'll get 2 full weeks of coaching with me in the College of Confidence, all for just $1.  Go to www.collegeofconfidence.com and enter code CHALLENGE Miracle Nighttime Routine Challenge This 5-day experience will help you -increase your sleep -reduce your stress -minimize unnecessary nighttime eating or drinking -create more time in your day -connect more intimately with people you love  3 Most Common Mistakes People with Nighttime Routines FALSE DESIRES  -Weak urges -Lack of focus on true desires POOR DESIGN -Absence of structure -Random approach UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS -Too tired, over-extenuated - miscalculation throughout the day -Poorly structured tasks, that are just too hard for fatigue   REST IS KINDNESS Let yourself be human. Let's stop competing in the insane competition of doing more and sleeping less. A unrested you is not a badge of honor - it's a declaration of mismanaged priorities.  I resisted this for years. I didn't want to be human. I wanted to burn the candle at both ends. I didn't want to have to say no to some things.  But when I tasted rest.  It turns out it was what I had been seeking all along.  I had to learn to break my own rules.  Sleep … boosts your immune system, prevents weight gain, increases mood, strengthens your heart, increases productivity, improves exercise performance, increases mental clarity, improves memory, reduces stress, lowers blood pressure, and heightens sex drive.    MIND-BLOWING CHANGE You'll think better. You'll feel better. You'll look better. Okay, but let's talk about sleep hygiene and sleep anxiety. Sleep Hygiene Make your room a sanctuary. Don't have a TV in your bedroom.Have an unwinding, last 90 minutesCreate a routine that it beautiful and alluringGo to bed to a made bed Sleep Anxiety Don't put pressure on yourself to fall asleep fastExplore sleep aids (fan, white noise, Moshi app, linen spray, melatonin)Journal, plan your next day and empty your brain before bedRest is still rest- don't stress about tossing and turning.Fight against the first thought of the day being a variant of "I'm so tired" Literally, sleep can skyrocket your confidence. Not to mention that by proxy, sleeping more will prevent you from -overeating -overdrinking -comparison scrolling -foggy thinking    LAST 90 MINUTES Pick a bedtime. Let others know about it.Identify your last 90 Minutes.Segment and structure in 3x30 minute chunks Raise your standards for yourself.

    Bonus Episode! Challenge Invite: Nighttime Routine Challenge Week

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 11, 2021 13:28

    Challenge Invite: Miracle Night Routine Challenge Bonus episode brought to you by the College of Confidence. We are the most encouraging place on the internet - and the joy and support just overflows. I couldn't help but give you a good Word to fill you this March. Today is a day of possibilities.Today is a day to reconsider your self-concept.Today is a day to step into who you are becoming. It is my passion to help set people free from self-doubt, small-thinking and self-sabotage - press in this year and possess this promised land of confidence and joy, peace and goodness for yourself. INVITE: NIGHTTIME ROUTINE CHALLENGE WEEK: You've heard of the miracle morning, but what about the miracle evening? It's all happening behind the walls of The College of Confidence, and YOU'RE invited to join the challenge for just $1! It's not too late to join us. We started yesterday ---- but the challenge is going on and you'll get full access when you join, PLUS you'll get 2 full weeks of coaching with me in the College of Confidence, all for just $1.Go to www.collegeofconfidence.com and enter code CHALLENGE Miracle Nighttime Routine Challenge This 5-day experience will help you-increase your sleep-reduce your stress-minimize unnecessary nighttime eating or drinking-create more time in your day-connect more intimately with people you love 5 Step-ProcessStep 1: Mindset Mastery (Ownership + Gratitude)Step 2: The #Last90MinutesStep 3: Quality Time with PeopleStep 4: Quality Time with YourselfStep 5: Quality Time for your Tomorrow People:People need people, and so do you - make a point to connect with the people you care about.Engage in various ways and find a way to laugh, be vulnerable or build someone else upSlow down and put boundaries on this time by protecting yourself from the pressures of the worldYourself:Do things that relax you and rejuvenate you. Know how to unwind, how to honor the day, understand your wins, be kind to yourself.Only allow things that make your feel better long-term, not short-term. Your Tomorrow: Set yourself up for a winning streak tomorrow by being prepared.Create a nurtured soul for the next day by spending time reflecting and connecting (with God)Finalize your sleep hygiene and mental rest - do whatever needed to reduce sleep anxiety 3 Most Common Mistakes People with Nighttime Routines FALSE DESIRES -Weak urges-Lack of focus on true desiresPOOR DESIGN-Absence of structure-Random approachUNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS-Too tired, over-extenuated - miscalculation throughout the day-Poorly structured tasks, that are just too hard for fatigue

    #433: How to Be Your Own Validation Voice

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2021 42:02

    Podcast #433 How To Be Your Own  Validation Voice   In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: Today we'll be coaching on… Why what "they" think doesn't matter and how to stop depending on outside affirmationResisting fear and rewiring the critical voice default you've programmed into yourself 10 Ways to practice your voice of self-validation   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Inspirational by liqerish For the lonest time I wanted to write a review. I want to talk about what you've done for my daughters life. Because you have inspired her and pushed her to move forward with your voice. This review is not so much about me but it is about the positive impact you've had on my family. I appreciate the spiritual take on this podcast and how you share with us about God, and encouraging us not to give up and follow our dreams. Thank you for encouraging my daughter. Giving her strength to go out in the world and follow her dreams. You've changed my life too. By watching my daughter grow, it's given me strength to let go of hard things. I've always felt I wanted to be a good role model as a mother and after hearing what you've gone through it's empowered me to improve on myself. Thank you.    OUTSIDE AFFIRMATION WEARS OFF   Real confidence is having an identity separate from outside affirmation.  Words of affirmation are like little jewels. When I get a compliment, or unexpected word of encouragement from someone, it feels like I'm rich inside. I thrive on outside affirmation, and always have. I'm a natural coachable athlete, teacher's pet, people pleaser, you name it, if it involved making people I admired proud, I was into it.  The problem is that when all on my confidence was built on what others said about me, my confidence became about what I did, and people's opinions -instead of- being about who I am and my own opinion of myself.  Real confidence is built from the inside out, not the outside in.  If you are over attached to people-pleasing or getting your confidence from others instead of from within yourself, then it's time to get coaching. Check out my coaching page at www.trishblackwell.com/coaching to get on my coaching waiting list, or hop right into the College of Confidence at www.collegeofconfidence.com to get started with group coaching today.   RESISTING FEAR AND REPROGRAMMING THE CRITICAL VOICE DEFAULT Decide if your life will be grounded on fear or on faith.Critical thoughts are fear based. What if I'm not good enough?What if no one really likes me?What if this passion project doesn't make a difference?What if I'll always be alone?What if I keep breaking my promises to myself? No life that is amazing is built on fear. Resist fear by: Declaring war against itBeing like Finn - always be looking for that squirrelDo one thing every day that scares you - show yourself that you're the boss of your fearBuild faith around you: make it your goal today to make someone else's day better. Dare to dream about positive what if's Make room only for belief in your life. Don't entertain or party with fear.Reprogram the critical voice by: Paying attention to your thought workTaking ownership of your responsibility to manage your thoughts (re: #432)Be annoyingly positive and encouraging in responsePractice patience - you're in this for the long haul. A reset takes time, and tedium.    SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime.

    #432: How to Talk Back to Yourself When Negative

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2021 37:44

      Podcast #432 How To Talk Back To Yourself When Negative How you talk to yourself determines so much about how you feel about yourself and how you feel about your life. In this podcast you'll learn how talk back to yourself when negative, how to take ownership of your thoughts, your responsibility with managing your mindset and also how to talk back confidently to negative people in your life. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/432 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:   Taking ownership of your thoughts, and your personal obligation to manage your mindset5 Things to do to talk back to yourself when negativeA bonus note on how to talk back to negative or nasty people   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Life Changing, by Traveler_18 I am so thankful for have come across your podcasts. My husband and I live in the Midwest and have been discussing the prospect of moving out west for many months now. It is a dream of ours to take on a big adventure and new city all on our own, but this means leaving my family behind in the Midwest. After listening to your podcasts for about a month now, I boldly and courageously told my husband that the move is a "go" and we are preparing whole heartedly for a move in a few months. Thank you for pushing me to follow my dreams and to use confidence in order to do so. If it's possible, I'd love for you to do a podcast on how to stay confident in who you are even when everything changes (aka moving / leaving family.)    MANAGING YOUR MINDSET: A PERSONAL OBLIGATION Yes, it's hard.But double yes, it's worth it. You can think you're broken, or you can complain that it's not easy, but those thoughts don't help move you forward. You're human. This is part of being human. There will always be a battle in your thoughts. If you want to create a life you love, you must create thoughts that you love. It's time to take ownership and stop wishing for change.   I wasted years hoping some of my habits would change, or that I would have more discipline to break some self-sabotage in my life. Hoping for change doesn't create change. If you want change in your life, you have to first believe it is possible.  Once you believe it's possible, change becomes inevitable. I have a new free audio workshop on exactly how to work through this process. This workshop is available for a *LIMITED TIME ONLY*. It's for you if  -You're ready to believe in creating change in your life-You're ready to "break the cycle" of habits that are keeping you stuck, in self-sabotage or in self-doubt-You're ready to change your life from being "good" to being "great" Go to www.trishblackwell.com/breakthecycle or hit the link in my bio to get started.   5 WAYS TO TALK BACK TO YOUR NEGATIVE SELF Let’s face it. Life will inundate you with negativity and in the overwhelm of our lives it’s easy to feel unconsciously negative, discouraged and well, just blah. It’s time to talk back to negativity / fear and win in your mindset. Here are 5 simple ways that REALLY work  Parent your thoughtsWrite out what’s actually happeningActivate boundaries on negative inputAffirm new neuropathways you wantLaugh at your negative thoughts https://fb.watch/3uMg_1QxD_/   SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient,

    #431: How to See Yourself Differently Than You Do

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2021 37:24

      Podcast #431 How To See Yourself Differently Than You Do I struggled for years with how I saw myself. If you've ready my book Insecurity Detox, you know that I had a season of my life where I had so much body image anxiety that I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror when I washed my hands.  My struggle is not an uncommon one. In my years of coaching I have heard from hundreds of women that they struggle with something similar.  It might express itself differently, but it's the same core issue: not being able to see yourself for who you really are.  That's why I had to do an entire podcast episode on this topic, to help you start to see yourself for how amazing you are. In the show I'll share with you what I did to start changing, the kinds of prayers I prayed to God in the process and how to start the process of seeing yourself differently as well.  If I can change how I see myself, I know you can too. The first place to start changing is by listening to the podcast episode --- > www.trishblackwell.com/431 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  How to start seeing yourself how others see youThe difference between You 1.0 and You 2.0A challenge that has the potential to completely change how you see yourself - that you can do today   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast  Guys, happy birthday to my beautiful 6-year-old Ellie.(Ellie lu, LuEllen, Lucia, Ellen story)Thank you to everyone still listening who remembers when I did this show before I had kids. I often think about my life as before-being-a-mom, and after-being-a-mom. And today is that day that divides everything for me. Happy 6th birthday to my beautiful Ellie! You are exquisitely kind, incredibly curious, courageously confident, attentively encouraging and delightfully creative. You being you makes everyone around you come alive.  Thank you for expanding my heart and teaching me to look at life differently.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: ShaneilB, Thank you Trish Trish!!! I'm loving the podcasts. I used to spend my days being in my head, that negative self talk. I would think negative about anything that comes out of my mouth. This week I focus on saying, "well…anyways." It's going well so far. I feel so good about myself this week and I can't wait to start jouranling and finish up the other episodes while practicing everything in my daily life. Thank you, thank you.    SO, YOU DON'T SEE YOURSELF HOW OTHERS SEE YOU "I wish you could see me the way I see you."-This is a beautiful, and frustrating statement.How do you get past it? How do you go deeper?  Realize that people aren't paying you lip service.Decide to stop being your own worst enemy.Make a list of what you bring to the table / why you rock.Find a way to celebrate / have gratitude for what you which you could change but can't (ie body type, your past, etc.)Create space in your daily life to think and journalAsk God to help you see yourself how He sees youBe mindful of inputsGuard your heart from comparison and coveting.Commit to making gratitude a prioritized spiritual practice in your lifeWork with a coach    DITCHING YOU 1.0 AND BECOMING YOU 2.0  Analyze and assess who you are.-Your behaviors-Your thoughts-Your actions -Your excuses-Your standards Create a vision of who you want to become-How you carry yourself-How you live-How you influence others-How much money you back-How you have relationships  Envision and act.-Visualize the you that you are becoming-Do things differently-Obsess about the small things -Slow down and take note of how you change-Create a new circle of influence-Cheer your new self on   BREAK ...

    #430: How to Make a Good Life a Great Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 16, 2021 38:08

    Podcast #430 How To Make A Good Life A Great Life If you have a good life but want to make it a great life, this episode is for you. Most people settle for good enough, for getting through the week, for bland, beige lives that are mostly unfulfilling, not just for them, but for the world around them. You were created for more. God created you to desire abundance, to walk in greatness and to use the measure of talents and gifts He has given you to make the world around you better. Buckle up for a conversation filled with tough love and inspiration to help you make a good life a great life. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/430 In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  Why you have a lot of good going on, but you feel unsettled at the end of the dayHow to improve your nighttime routine Unbelieving and believing greatness in your life   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: The Clincher, 5 Stars by MadMakeup24 I'm not alone when I say I've struggled with anxious thoughts. It is an ironic turn of events for me when I think about where I am versus 3 years ago. Coming to terms with the fact that I am human and deserving of higher thinking was an uphill battle. When I first hear do Trish it was a moment in my life where I can say I drew a line in the sand. Perfectly imperfect. Turning 30 rocked my world. Self imposed life threatening thoughts will tear up your soul and force you to live in insecurity. Because I wrapped my brain around others, I didn't have time to think about my God given powers. Because I've stepped into His light, I know that my temporary feelings are not who I am, but they are shaping me into the woman I want to be. To have the mental fortitude and tenacious attitude that Trish does makes her one in a million. Because I took those steps into confidence with her I feel I don't owe anything to anyone but myself. I owe it to myself to be grateful! In those three years: I found the man of my dreams and he proposed marriage. We are buying a home together. I had the guts to stand up to my bullies at the office and now we're working together. I figured out my finances (which was a source of anxiety) and bought myself my dream car. I've become this unstoppable force of a woman who dreams big now. The clincher is that she was inside me all along. Trish gave me the shovel to dig her out.    QUOTES FROM GOOD TO GREAT Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap and Others Don't  Jim Collins. Check it out on Amazon > https://amzn.to/2Yfw3R4 “Good is the enemy of great. And that is one of the key reasons why we have so little that becomes great. We don't have great schools, principally because we have good schools. We don't have great government, principally because we have good government. Few people attain great lives, in large part because it is just so easy to settle for a good life.” “Greatness is not a function of circumstance. Greatness, it turns out, is largely a matter of conscious choice, and discipline.”  “For, in the end, it is impossible to have a great life unless it is a meaningful life. And it is very difficult to have a meaningful life without meaningful work.”  “Faith in the endgame helps you live through the months or years of buildup.”  “What separates people, Stockdale taught me, is not the presence or absence of difficulty, but how they deal with the inevitable difficulties of life.”  “Greatness is not a function of circumstance. Greatness, it turns out, is largely a matter of conscious choice.”    WHY YOUR LIFE IS "GOOD" BUT YOU STILL FEEL SO U...

    #429: Why You’re Not Doing What You Say You Want to Be Doing

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 9, 2021 34:07

    Podcast #429 Why You're Not Doing What You Say You Want to Be Doing You know what to do, so why aren't you doing it? If you've ever been stuck in this cycle of being motivated to change, but not being able to get started or sustain new habits, you are not alone. This is a common struggle and there are a 3 things that are probably keeping you stuck. This episode will help you break the cycle of frustration. In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  The 3 reasons you are not doing what you want to be doingHow to break the cycle of frustration Re-establishing your inner locus of self-respect and self-trust   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Let's get you to 1K Trish I discovered this podcast exactly a week ago. And I've been listening to you everyday, your voice is so soothing, your voice sounds so genuine. I'm writing this review not knowing what to say to you because there's so much, but you said just write a review so others can be reached and touched by this podcast. I've recently started going to church again, I'm currently on the Daniel fast. So I truly believe it's not a coincidence that I came across your podcast. Thank you for all of your teachings. I can't wait to join the College of Confidence to learn more. Stay safe. Love Maritza.    Note: Anyone Looking to Go Back to Church Here are My Favorite Online Church Communities: National Community Church, with Pastor Mark Batterson Elevation Church, with Pastor Steven Furtik Transformation Church, with Pastor Michael Todd Vous Church Equip and Empower, with Christine Caine Joyce Meyer Podcast   3 REASONS YOU NOT DOING WHAT YOU WANT TO BE DOING: I “know” what to do, so why am I not doing it Trish?  I get asked this all the time. There are 3 main causes... You don't think you'll get the results.You don't *know* that you are capable / you're stuck in your own self-conceptYou don't manage your mind as much as you manage your habits. Build your confidence on a solid foundation and you will see breakthrough in your consistency and ability to show up for yourself. When you show up for yourself from a place of boldness and resilience, you *will* get results.    HOW TO BREAK THE CYCLE OF FRUSTRATION Slow down. Pick one of the causes - just one - and go deep into your self-coaching work to rewire how you're thinking about it. Sometimes, we have to take a risk and take action; proving to ourselves that our efforts are never wasted.  Pray: ask God to show you who you really are. When we ask, He answers; but we must slow down and listen, because the answer is often in a whisper. Breakthrough happens in the quiet.  Create structure to how you manage your mind.    RE-ESTABLISHING YOUR SELF-RESPECT AND SELF-TRUST Often we aren't doing what we say we want to do because our self-respect is tarnished. If you don't respect yourself, you won't show up for yourself. The more you don’t show up for yourself, the more you will learn that you're not worthy of trusting yourself; and the vicious cycle continues.  The way out is to learn to love yourself. Not through frou-frou self-love practices, because let's be honest: you won't do them consistently enough to get the results because well, you already struggle with consistency and you don't think that they work anyways or that you have time. We need to dial into a deeper self-love. And that's what I'm teaching in my upcoming live workshop in the College of Confidence. The workshop is this week, and it'll be recorded for you - but I'd love for you to come live to it.

    #428: How to Not Feel Like You’re Falling Behind In Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 2, 2021 35:17

      Podcast #428 How to Not Feel Like You're Falling Behind In Life In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  Why you feel you're falling behind in lifeWhy you're not behind, even if you feel like you areThe 4 imperative stages of how to reframe your thoughts about being behind10 simple thought habits to ditch the feeling of feeling behind   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Laggie1018 The Complete Package!, 5-Stars I first started listening to Trish's podcasts a little over a year ago. I cannot tell you how much it has positively changed my life! Trish has taught me how to have a more confident mindset and she does it with the ease and love of a best friend. She sprinkles in messages of faith and God to make this podcast unlike any other.  I am still working o my confidence and my fear of what others think, but I am lightyears ahead of where I was before I found her. I recognize this as a life-long journey, on that I am CONFIDENT I will progress through with more and more peace. Thank you Trish for all your love, your wisdom, your faith, your honesty, and for just being so dang amazing.    YOU'RE NOT BEHIND IN LIFE, EVEN IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE You are where you need to be. In order to get to where we want to go, there are lessons in which we must grow. You might be circling the same spot because you are stubbornly refusing the lessons. Or perhaps because the lesson is patience, perseverance and presence. But you're not falling behind in life. Life is not measuring you. What is "behind" anyway? Who are you comparing to? Is what you think is "ahead" really actually better? It's important to look at your flawed belief system: Most of the time we assume that those "ahead" of us are happier than us, more confident than us, more worthy / valuable than us.One of the most courageous things you can do is to be honest with yourself about flawed thinking What are you assuming will be easier about your life once you get "there" or have "that'?Happiness and worth isn't something we chase, because you can't chase what you already have access to --> you have to shift what you're looking at and look through a new lens   THE FOUR STAGES TO REFRAME FEELING BEHIND IN LIFE   Get Honest About Where You Are. Stop running from the truth. Stop twisting the truth. Most people want to start where they want to end without even starting. And then they're jealous of people who are where they want to be without having done any of the work. Grow where you want to go.  Get Brutal About Whose Opinion Matters What timeline are you following?  What does it mean to actually be behind in life? Says who?  Get Focused on Massive Gratitude If you're growing, you're going, and if you're going you can feel gratitude. Take something from everywhere you are and have been. Look for the lessons you needed in each place Get Committed to Massive Action  Massive action on a daily and simple basis Know your priorities versus your preferences Be willing to do something different than you've ever done Put some skin in the game and commit at a new level for yourself    Other Podcast Episodes You'll Enjoy:  How to Think Like a Happy Person, Episode #424 www.trishblackwell.com/424 What Will "They" Say, Episode #423 www.trishblackwell.com/423 How to Stop Caring What People Think Webinar www.trishblackwell.com/stopcaring   SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELP Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling,

    #427: Hardship, Suffering, and Holding onto Hope

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 26, 2021 60:32

      Podcast #427 Hardship, Suffering and Holding onto Hope Hardship and suffering are unavoidable in life, but how do you walk through them with faith, confidence and unwavering hope? Special guest and extraordinarily inspiring human being, Tony Nunez shares powerful insight through his experience as a young man with ALS. Husband, father of three young girls and youth pastor, Tony 's passion for people and his ability to see the good in life no matter what will change how you see your own hardships and suffering.  In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  Hardship, and how to endure with hope when suffering seems unfairALS and praying for miracles The power of pursuing people and community, and sharing in suffering with others   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Trish I do not even know where to begin, .You are an amazing woman and I thank you for all you do for me and everyone,. You were recommended to me by a dear friend in April of 2020. I was in a very dark place due to a divorce. You saved me. You gave me the confidence and strength I needed. My ex husband is a narcissist and the emotional abuse was insane. I was so scared to leave but I did it and I'm so proud of myself Trish may God bless you and I hope to someday meet you. Do not ever stop what you do. You are truly an earth angel.  - Charity Fellows   Thank you Tony Nunez for your light and your vulnerability. Links Mentioned in the Conversation with Tony: www.trishblackwell.com/als Wisdom Nuggets from Tony: "ALS does not number my days, God numbers my days." "Pursue people, there is beauty in suffering when in community." "God is not surprised by my ALS; there is still goodness in suffering."   LISTENER OF THE EPISODE:  I am 19 years old and I’m from small town Indiana. I started listening to your podcasts about a year ago. I was in my lowest place. My senior year had just been canceled, i was rude to my family and friends, I was gaining Weight, I could hardly even look myself in the mirror without feeling disgusted. It seemed like my whole world was falling apart, then I found you. And little by little everything started to change. It is now been two months since I’ve had a bad day (self hatred).  I feel completely transformed. I am loving the new me.  I have some business experience from running my own nonprofit organization, DDOC (Dresses for Daughters of Christ). It’s a nonprofit that I started when I was 12 years old. DDOC provides dresses along with a relationship with Christ to little girls all around the world. In the 7 years DDOC has been a living Mission, my community and I have made and delivered nearly 6000 dresses to 13 different countries. Praise God! I have seen first hand women all across the world who need to be reminded of their worth and purpose. I know that I have so much more to give to this world.  You are incredible. Never stop being you.  With love, Maura  https://www.facebook.com/dressesfordaughtersofchrist/

    #426: Never Second Guess Yourself Again

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 19, 2021 42:59

    Podcast #426Never Second Guess Yourself AgainYou can learn how to never second guess yourself again when you learn how to manage the whirlwind of thoughts that swirl through your mind on a daily basis. In this episode of The Confidence podcast, we're talking about Mind Drama, Second-Guessing Yourself and Self-Coaching yourself out of the second-guessing spiral.In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: Why we second-guess ourselves and what it meansThe mind drama that goes on behind the scenes of the second-guessing10 ways to never second guess yourself again (and one mega bonus thought)THANK YOU: PATRONSJust some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast REVIEW OF THE WEEK: Highly recommend!!!! 5 Stars v.AlissaI've listened to various podcasts and Ted talks about confidence and mental strength but this is by far the best! Trish's words are encouraging, motivating, and comforting, and if you practice what she teaches you'll realize how real they are. I have become my most confident, authentic self since discovering this podcast and I can't wait to continue my mental healthy journey with Trish as my guide. Keep it up Trish, you are a God send!   SECOND GUESSING YOURSELF + MIND DRAMA Mind drama: it will always happen, but you don’t always have to get sucked into it.  Second Guessing:Happens when we don't trust ourselves.Happens when we experience the phenomenon of mind drama  What is mind drama:Ping-pong conversations with yourself.The knot of thoughts that you unravel only to find knotted again.Needing to reset your thoughts over and over Mind drama is normal:Managing your mind is part of living a highly effective lifeYou aren't failing if you need to reset and realign your thoughtsIt's normal to need to set your mindWe'll always have resistance pushing in on us  Why We Second-Guess Ourselves in the First Place:We think the mind drama means we're out of controlWe're too attached to old identities (like we don't follow through)We have thorns of perfectionism still clinging to us (the desire for all circumstances to be just right) We care too much what people think SPONSORSHIP NOTE: BETTERHELPIs there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start?  BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment - it's so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y'all, this isn't self-help, this is professional counseling. What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You’ll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.   Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed. It’s more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is available. Their licensed professional counselors specialize in depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflict, grief, and self-esteem. I want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting www.betterhelp.com/confidencepod How to Self-Coach Yourself Through Mind Drama:Make time and create space.Use pen and paper.Talk to yourself out loud.Peel back what you're really thinking and what it meansDetermine what you are believing Create a new dialogue with yourself about being your own coach Go back to an affirmation10 Ways to Never Second Guess Yourself Again:Rebuild your self-trust. Notice and replace thoughts throughout the day. Embrace risk-taking.

    #425: Why You Never Follow Through And How To Fix It

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2021 41:18

      PODCAST #425 Why You Never Follow Through And How To Fix It Do you find it hard to show up for yourself? Do you tired of never following through? Why is it that some people can follow through on what they say they want and some people can't? This podcast episode is going to dive into helping you understand why you never follow through and how to fix it. In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:  The secret to keeping your promises to yourselfWhy you keep breaking your word and what it's doing to your confidenceHow to really keep your resolutions this year and get massive results    THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   REVIEW OF THE WEEK Positive & Powerful. Mrs.Schlump If you're wanting to get rid of that voice in your head that's full of self doubt and self hate, start here! Trish gives you the tools to start digging a little deeper.    THE SECRET TO KEEPING YOUR PROMISES TO YOURSELF Self-respect.Self-truthMicro habitsPatience   WHY YOU KEEP BREAKING YOUR WORD: You think it doesn't matter.You think other people are more important to you.You don't believe that what you do will make a difference.You haven't prioritized properly.You aren't training your thoughts and thinking about what you think about.You are obsessed about the "how" instead of being committed to the "what"You are distracted and throwing hours of your time away watching other peoples' lives.You haven't worked your belief deeply enough.You aren't proactively practicing self-trust. You punish yourself for what you're not doing instead of taking note of what you are doing.You are hyper-focused on the finish line.You aren't willing to be bored.You are cycling in compare and despair.You haven't established solid life routines to set yourself up for success. You are putting too much pressure on yourself and have to-do guilt.You chase perfection instead of progression.You're too focused on what people think about you.  References:How to Stop Being a People Pleaser, Episode #421:www.trishblackwell.com/421 Tiny Habits: Small Change that Change Everything, by BJ Fogg https://amzn.to/35asCiyTo-Do Guilt:To reduce guilt and overwhelm, we have to decide what it is that we care about. If you stretch yourself too thin, then you are too thinly caring about too many things. Exhaustion results. The trick is to figure out what you care about and what will help you feel like you're moving forward, not being busy. How do we do this? By identifying 2-3 things daily - either in work or in what you do in your home - that feels satisfying.    HOW TO REALLY KEEP YOUR RESOLUTIONS THIS YEAR Focus on tiny habits.Really know why you want to change.Believe that change is possible.Get ready to embrace boredom.Think of yourself as your future self-concept.Put a line in the sand for who you used to be with follow through.Get a coach.Surround yourself with other committed people.Take responsibility for your results and happiness.Get serious about how you think.Use powerful affirmations.Speak life over yousrself  Bonus Resources for Affirmations:YouTube Video: https://youtu.be/HdFAdZh6NckPodcast Episode: https://www.trishblackwell.com/423-2/Downloadable PDF and MP3: https://trishblackwell.lpages.co/christian-meditations/ We have a new course soon releasing the College of Confidence on how to customize and curate powerful affirmations on your own. You don't want to miss this course, which will be exclusively available to College of Confidence students. Not yet a student? Click here (www.collegefoconfidence.com) to get started.

    #424: How to Think Like A Happy Person

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2021 35:03

    PODCAST #424How To Think Like a Happy PersonEveryone wants to know how to come alive and how to be happy, but so few people figure out how to do either. Your vibrancy, your happiness and your success are all contingent on how you think. Learn 10 ways to bring more life to your life and the foundational basis on how to think as a happy person in 2021. This is going to be the year that your confidence doubles, so let's get started! In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: How to Choose Life in Your Life, and How Choosing Life Will Help Others Come Alive TooThe Real Way to Double Your Happiness This Year; 10 ways to be happier in 2021How to Think Like a Happy PersonAn Invitation to Double Your Confidence in the Next 100 Dayswrite a review on iTunes THANK YOU: PATRONSJust some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you.Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcastYa'll, we hit #69 on the Top 100 iTunes Charts for Personal Development! Thank you!!!  REVIEW OF THE WEEK Amazing. 5-Stars. Syd-pinkI've been listening to this podcast everyday for about a month now and it has already helped me grow so much. I started listening to Trish when I really took a look at my life and realized that I lacked the confidence and security within myself that I needed and wanted so badly. I will continue to make this podcast a part of my daily routine and I'm excited for the incredible journey that I am on.  COME ALIVE. DECIDE AND DO THESE STEPS:Take life so others take lifePrenez vie, prenez vie, que les os prennent vie Prenez vie, prenez vie, que les os prennent vie Éveillez-vousÀ Sa lumière Prenez vie, prenez vie Je vais chanter aux os secs Jusqu’à ce qu’ils vivent à nouveau Et que les vallées fleurissent Comme une rose au soleil Come alive, come alive, come alive dry bonesCome alive, come alive, come alive dry bonesAwake, ariseInhale the lightCome alive, come aliveI'm gonna sing to you dry bonesUntil you're covered in lifeAnd the valleys bloomLike a rosebud in the light HOW TO COME ALIVEBe yourself.Focus your energy on good things.Build your self-concept with affirmations.Let your brain breath with effective journaling.Release yourself from perfection and pursue the processFind joy in every dayGround yourself in gratitudeSee yourself through God's eyesStop punishing yourselfThink bigger than you're comfortable doing - be courageous with your feelings HOW TO DOUBLE YOUR HAPPINESSHappiness is a thought, not a feeling.It is free from circumstances - it starts with a decision.I choose to be happy.I am responsible for my happiness.No one else can make me happy. HOW TO THINK LIKE A HAPPY PERSONTake responsibility for your thoughts.Know that your happiness is not connected to your circumstances.Do things that create beauty in your life.Create an atmosphere of gratitude and flexible perspective.Have purpose, know who you are and what you want Be okay with some mind dramaExpect good things to happen and trust GodLook for the good in all thingsLive a simple life - reduced input, reduced gossip, reduced worrySurround yourself with good people  THE 100 CONFIDENT DAY CHALLENGEWill you join us!? What's the goal of the challenge?We have two goals. #1: To build your consistency and self-trust and #2: To double your confidence. The challenge will show you just how much can change when you show up daily for yourself and you train your confidence intentionally.To get in on the Challenge just enroll in the College of Confidence at www.collegeofconfidence.com Thoughts To Journal:What does coming alive look like in your life?If you were to put a number on how alive you are, where do you fall?Identify what is keeping your light dim - is it fear, it is caring what people think,

    #423: Words to Create a Beautiful Year (Bonus Episode)

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 1, 2021 16:45

        Words To Create A Beautiful Year   Podcast #423 - Bonus Episode   This is a special bonus episode brought to you by the College of Confidence. We are the most encouraging place on the internet - and the joy and support just overflows. I couldn't help but give you a good Word to fill you this January first. Today is a day of possibilities. Today is a day to reconsider your self-concept. Today is a day to step into who you are becoming. It is my passion to help set people free from self-doubt, small-thinking and self-sabotage - press in this year and possess this promised land of confidence and joy, peace and goodness for yourself.     We're launching the #100ConfidentDays Challenge in the College of Confidence Confidence is birthed and strengthened from action, not from feelings.  You won't wait to feel confident to take action - you take action and then you'll feel confident. And this will help you create a beautiful year. The challenge will show you just how much can change when you show up daily for yourself and you train your confidence intentionally. The goal is that by day #100 you will see that you confidence has doubled.      Join the College of Confidence to join the #100ConfidentDays Challenge here ---> www.collegeofconfidence.com So, my gift to you is a 5-minute meditation with me - this is what I listen to every morning, and I invite you to save the episode for yourself to do the same. Stand firm in the truth - for the fight for your faith --- which happens in the battlefield of your mind --- is the most important fight you will fight every single day. These affirmations will help you to create a beautiful year. Get the meditation MP3 and full workbook at www.trishblackwell.com/meditations Watch the longer meditations video on YouTube at https://youtu.be/HdFAdZh6Nck

    #423: What Will “They” Say?

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 29, 2020 36:44

      What Will "They" Say? PODCAST #423 What will "they" say is often part of the internal self-talk that can keep you sidelined from your dreams. This podcast episode explores who "they" are and how to get their voices to quiet down and even go to "mute" so that you can get on with your life and go do big things. It's time to stop caring so much about what "they" think and this podcast pep-talk will super-fuel you to take massive action and to go be audaciously bold. Get the full show notes at ww.trishblackwell.com/423In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: What "they" voices are holding you back in life?What is it that you are so afraid they will say?What happens if you quit or if you stick to something with fierce determination? How to know which to do and how to make sure you quit the right things in 2021 and stick to the things you really want.    REVIEW OF THE WEEK I have always struggled with my body image. Now I have a beautiful daughter I am so scared that if she grows up having a mom with poor confidence, that she may never see her own beauty. I went on a search for a positive message and found this podcast. I started from the oldest episode I could scroll back to and it took me exactly where I needed to be! I am a first time mom to a beautiful one year old baby girl, which is exactly where Trish was in 2016.  I was thrilled to find out that Trish was also a faith based woman and love that she shares her walk with Christ. Since I have started listening on my way to work everyday I have also purchased her book Insecurity Detox. I love starting and ending my day with Trish's positivity and truth. Thank you for sharing your journey with us, you are truly an inspiration. -Kim Todd God's Perfect Timing. KimBTodd.   THANK YOU: PATRONS Just some special love and deep gratitude your way for how you support the show. You are a small and mighty group and each and every one of your contributions feels like a big, warm, wiggle hug. Thank you. Want to be part of the people who help keep this show going? Consider becoming a patron. Just go to https://www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast   What "They" Say About Me? First off, who is "they"? An elusive group of people that you can't nameA large category of people that intimate youA small group of specific friends / bullies from 10 years agoA collection of your own thoughts of self-doubt, small-thinking and shame Are they really even talking about you? Are you going to give them the right to reign in your life? And, if they even do say something - so what.  Do you want to live cautiously or courageously? Do you want to make an impact or protect yourself? Do you want to come alive or do you want to live half-heartedly? Prenez vie, prenez vie.    Feeling and Failing - The Two Things To Go After If you're good at feeling, you'll stop self-sabotaging. If you're good at failing, you'll stop procrastinating. Feeling will give you resilience and self-awareness. Your increased awareness will give you higher quality thoughts and a better self-concept, enabling you to see yourself capable of things far beyond your previous emotional intelligence. Failing will give you courage, perseverance and a stick-to-it-ness / scrappiness that results in the confidence that there is truly nothing that can stand between you and the results you want in life.    When Quitting Is Good -Stopping something is powerful, not always weak -Have the courage to do what is right for you - to pivot -Break up with past behaviors    How To Stick To What You Want Increase self-trustHave a higher standard of integrity (keeping your word to yourself)Start telling a different narrative about what "they" sayPut more value on what "you" say and what you wantStop worrying about how you look doing it and just do it    ANNOUNCEMENTS: Want more results, and ready to stop talking about and start doing something ab...

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