The Update with Brandon Julien

In today's edition of The Update Journal, the Yankees try to figure out life without Aaron Judge, which is like asking the Avengers to handle the final battle without Captain America, Iron Man, or anyone tall enough to reach the good snacks on top of the fridge. Judge's rib injury comes with that dreaded “4–6 weeks before re-imaging” timeline, which is not a return date — it's a medical cliffhanger. That means the Yankees aren't just waiting for him to come back; they're waiting to find out when they can start waiting for him to come back. Somewhere in the Bronx, the lineup card is being filled out with prayer, duct tape, and whatever's left in the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre RailRiders group chat.Then, A Closer Look heads to the NBA Finals, where ESPN somehow found itself in hot water for using an AI-generated Tony Parker image during Game 1. Because apparently the Worldwide Leader in Sports had access to decades of NBA footage, Getty Images, highlight packages, old Spurs broadcasts, and probably at least one intern who knows how Google Images works… and still chose “Tony Parker if he was rendered by a confused Xbox.” It's bad enough when AI steals jobs, but now it's apparently stealing cheekbones from retired point guards.And in today's Honorable Mention, we visit LA's first bikini coffee shop, where the baristas are serving lattes, dealing with weirdos, and proving once again that some people cannot be trusted around caffeine, confidence, or women just trying to do their jobs. It's one thing to order an iced vanilla latte; it's another thing to make the barista mentally file you under “security risk with oat milk.” Only in Los Angeles could coffee come with foam art, a dress code controversy, and a customer base that needs to be reminded this is still technically a workplace.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, a teen yakking on his phone on a bus was told by a fellow rider to pipe down — and turned around and fatally shot the guy, cops and law-enforcement sources said.A jury convicted a man of manslaughter as a hate crime in the death of O'Shae Sibley, who was killed at a Brooklyn gas station during a confrontation that began with a group of young people shouting racist and anti-gay slurs at the professional dancer and his friends as they vogued to a Beyoncé song.And out in the American West, Progressive city council member Nithya Raman has advanced to a November runoff against Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass, setting up an unexpected matchup between two Democrats and former political allies to run the struggling city of nearly 4 million.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we begin with what was supposed to be a casual trip into AMC's Interview With the Vampire, and somehow ended with Anne Rice lore, emotional damage, and me wondering why nobody assigned Claudia a therapist, a curfew, or a probation officer. Because once I found out about Claudia — who she was, what happened to her, and the full weight of her story — that's when the nightmares started. Not just regular vampire nightmares, either. Specific Claudia nightmares. The kind where she shows up in my subconscious like, “You understand me now, right?” And I'm like, “Yes… which is exactly why I'm running.”Then, it's A Closer Look at the complicated experience of wanting the Knicks to win the NBA Finals… until I remember James Dolan exists. I want the players to win, the fans to win, and the city to finally explode with joy. But every time the celebration starts forming in my head, Dolan appears in the mental group chat like, “Don't forget who owns the building.”And finally, graduation season is here — that beautiful time of year when families gather in hot auditoriums and crowded gyms to clap for people they absolutely do not know. You hear a name, everybody cheers, and suddenly you're clapping too like, “Yes, whoever that was! Proud of you!” Because graduation is basically two hours of polite hostage behavior… with diplomas.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Monday, Five people were injured in a stabbing inside Penn Station, according to authorities. Five people were rushed to Bellevue Hospital, including one person with serious injuries, two people with moderate injuries, and two others with minor injuries, fire officials said.An 85-year-old pedestrian was struck and killed by a falling tree inside a Queens park on Saturday night in a fatal freak mishap, according to police.And in Ohio, police still had no suspects in custody after a weekend shooting near a street festival wounded 12 people and sent attendees scrambling for cover in a busy Toledo neighborhood.

In this unaired edition of The Update Journal, we enter the emotional courtroom of television drama, bad decisions, and people who absolutely knew better.First up: “Not Everyone Deserves Your Sympathy — And Apparently, Not Everyone Gets to Stay on the Case.” Captain Olivia Benson and Sergeant Amanda Rollins get into it on the latest episode of Law & Order: SVU, proving once again that no one can turn workplace tension into a full-blown moral philosophy seminar quite like the Special Victims Unit. One minute, they're trying to solve a case. The next minute, Benson is giving a look that says, “I have survived 26 seasons of trauma, do not test me before lunch,” while Rollins is standing there like, “Okay, but what if the person is terrible and I'm right?”It's the kind of SVU argument where nobody is technically wrong, everyone is emotionally exhausted, and somewhere in the background, Fin is probably thinking, “I could've retired three murders ago.”Then we move into Brandon's hot take: Every cheating show has that one rapper.You know the one.Every single relationship scandal show has some guy who walks in with sunglasses indoors, three chains, a studio session booked at 9, and absolutely no intention of answering a question directly. His girlfriend is crying. The host is reading text messages off a tablet. The audience is gasping. And he's sitting there like, “First of all, that's not even how it happened.”Sir, there are screenshots.There is location data.There is a woman backstage named “Mimi from the video shoot.”And somehow, his defense is always: “I was networking.”Networking?! At 2:17 in the morning in a hotel lobby? With someone saved in your phone as “Do Not Answer”? That's not networking. That's a federal investigation with bass boosted.This episode is about sympathy, accountability, bad explanations, and the dangerous overlap between crime dramas and reality TV — because whether it's SVU or a cheating show, somebody is always being questioned under pressure, somebody is lying with confidence, and somebody definitely should have called a lawyer before speaking.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

On this unaired edition of The Update Journal from 2/5/26, we enter a world where everything is “smart,” but somehow nobody is in charge.First up: “If Everything Is Smart, Nothing Is Independent” — a closer look at the 2026 HGTV Dream Home, a beautiful, futuristic house packed with smart lights, smart appliances, smart security, smart thermostats, and apparently one very powerful villain: Spectrum internet. Because nothing says “dream home” like realizing your $2.5 million luxury escape can be defeated by a router blinking orange in the corner. The refrigerator knows your grocery list, the blinds adjust themselves, the oven preheats from your phone — but the second the Wi-Fi goes out, congratulations, you now live in a very expensive cave with recessed lighting.Then: “When the Phone Goes Away, Time Itself Stops Existing” — lessons learned from the NYC school phone ban, where students are discovering that without their phones, analog clocks might as well be ancient hieroglyphics. Teachers are pointing at the wall saying, “Class ends at 2:15,” and students are staring back like they've been asked to decode the Zodiac Killer's last letter. The phone ban was supposed to help kids focus, but it also revealed a shocking truth: for some students, if the time isn't glowing in the corner of a screen, time is just a rumor.It's an episode about modern convenience, old-school survival skills, and the terrifying realization that between a smart house and a smartphone, we may have accidentally outsourced basic human independence to Wi-Fi and battery life.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we return to the CBS drama because apparently yesterday's “60 Minutes” story was not finished — it was just buffering. Scott Pelley gets fired, CBS somehow looks at one of the most respected journalists in the building and says, “You know what this newsroom needs? Less alarm system,” and Knicks coverage is partly responsible for why we had to circle back like a subway train skipping your stop.Then, Dunkin' enters its new $6 Meal Deal era, where breakfast has officially been wrapped, folded, and placed into witness protection until August 12th. The old deal is gone, the wraps are here, and somewhere a hash brown is asking if it needs a lawyer.And finally, The Last Word brings us The Calm Before the Real Summer Storm — that brief, suspicious window where summer is technically here, but the full heat, humidity, schedule chaos, and “why am I sweating indoors?” phase hasn't fully attacked yet. Enjoy the breeze while it lasts. It has terms and conditions.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Friday, a massive fire tore through multiple buildings of a historic psychiatric facility in the Hudson Valley, wild footage shows. The blaze erupted at the abandoned Hudson River Psychiatric Center in Poughkeepsie, which was established in 1867 and placed on the National Register of Historic Places in 2007 after closing years earlier, according to Pix 11.This nut didn't fall too far from the tree. Teflon Don John Gotti's grandson is back in cuffs for allegedly slapping and choking his gal pal – just days before he was due to start serving a prison sentence for stealing COVID relief funds.And out in the American West in Los Angeles, after a tough first term framed by the most destructive wildfire in city history and an ongoing struggle with widespread homelessness, Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass advanced to a November runoff as she fights to stay in City Hall against challengers from both ends of the political spectrum.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we say goodbye to the old Dunkin' $6 Meal Deal — because apparently breakfast had a working-class era and corporate decided it was time for layoffs. For a brief, beautiful moment, six dollars could get you fed, caffeinated, and emotionally prepared to face society. Now? We gather around the hash browns, lower the flag to half-croissant, and remember when breakfast had a budget and dignity came with a wake-up wrap.Then, A Closer Look heads into the drama over at 60 Minutes, where Scott Pelley reportedly confronted the show's new executive producer, Nick Bilton, during a staff meeting. And listen — when Scott Pelley is the one bringing the heat, you know something has gone terribly wrong, because this is not a man built for nonsense. This is a man who looks like he fact-checks his own dreams. Reportedly confronting the boss in a staff meeting? That's not workplace tension. That's “the group chat is going to be unbearable by lunch” energy.And today's Honorable Mention takes us into the future of teen romance, where some boys are choosing AI girlfriends over real-life relationships — with experts warning that the consequences could be disastrous. Because apparently dating has gotten so exhausting that some people said, “You know what would make this easier? Removing the human.” Nothing says healthy emotional development like forming a deep connection with an app that remembers your birthday because a server farm told it to. We used to worry about teens not going outside. Now we have to worry that their first breakup is going to come with a software update.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Thursday, a prediction market reported former U.S. Rep. George Santos to federal prosecutors after he boasted he'd be going to President Trump's State of the Union address, then bet against his own attendance, according to a person familiar with the investigation.A stranger stabbed a 42-year-old man during an early Wednesday clash just blocks from Times Square, police said. The victim was knifed once in the chest just after 2 a.m. outside a building on West 42nd Street near Ninth Avenue in Hell's Kitchen, a storefront shared by a Chinese restaurant and a pizzeria, cops said. And out in the American West, a man was shot and killed by the FBI after taking 10 school employees hostage inside a Southern California office building and warning that he had strapped explosives to himself and some of the hostages, police said.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, the NBA Finals start today, which means New York has officially entered its most dangerous emotional state: confident, confused, and wearing old jerseys from a closet that hasn't been opened since 1999. We preview Knicks vs. Spurs the only honest way possible — by admitting nobody knows what's going to happen and calling that journalism.Then, Mayor Mamdani takes emergency action and repeals bedtime so New York children can stay up for the Finals — even though most of them weren't alive the last time the Knicks got this far, and, disturbingly, some of their parents weren't either. Naturally, the kids respond by forming a Knicks caucus, demanding juice boxes during halftime, and asking why Allan Houston isn't on TikTok.And in Brandon's Take this week, we investigate the June Fake-Out: the annual scam where summer technically begins, but school, work, responsibilities, and random 63-degree mornings refuse to leave the building. It's June, the calendar says summer is close, but emotionally? We're still being held hostage by spring with a bad attitude.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Wednesday, Rebecca Bennett, a former Navy helicopter pilot, won the New Jersey Democratic primary in the battleground 7th Congressional District to take on Republican Rep. Tom Kean Jr., who has been absent from Congress with an unspecified illness for months. Kean cruised to the Republican nomination after running unopposed. The powerful teachers' union delivered a master class in wheeling and dealing — winning pay bumps of up to $9,500 as part of a deal delaying New York's class size mandate.And in Detroit, Two scientists at a U.S. government lab were charged with smuggling vials of deactivated monkeypox virus into the country from Africa and lying about it during interviews with investigators at a Michigan airport, authorities said.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we are emotionally logging into the internet against our better judgment.First, we'll take A Closer Look at the end of Euphoria — a show I did not fully watch, but absolutely survived through Twitter clips, timeline arguments, and people acting like HBO had assigned homework. The series is officially over, which means one era of glitter, trauma, dramatic lighting, and “wait, what happened?” has come to an end.Then, we'll take A Closer Look at another aspect of the Knicks and Spurs as part of our coverage previewing for the NBA Finals that start tomorrow- this time, we're talking about the NBA Cup, the Knicks, the Spurs, and the banner that stayed safely in storage. Yes, the Knicks and Spurs technically played for a title before this Finals matchup — but whether that title counts depends on who you ask, how seriously they take the Cup, and whether there was enough confetti to make it feel official.And today's Honorable Mention goes to Pepsi, which apparently once looked at Yoo-hoo and said, “We can do that.” They could not, in fact, do that. Chocolate soda history was made, lessons were learned, and somewhere, Yoo-hoo is still standing with its arms folded.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, a 22-year-old woman was taken into custody after a 28-year-old man was stabbed to death inside his Long Island home, cops say.A pair of unusual caught-on-camera sightings of men emerging from Brooklyn manholes in recent weeks raised concerns in the Big Apple and sparked an NYPD probe — but sources said it doesn't appear the weirdos are up to anything sinister.And out in the American West, California spiraled toward a primary election with its two marquee races defined by uncertainty and a pair of outsider candidates looking to crack open the state's durable Democratic hierarchy.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, New York is doing what it does best: celebrating, complaining, overheating, and somehow turning all three into a full schedule.We start with A Closer Look at the Knicks vs. Spurs — New York Is Partying Like It's 1999 Again, because the Knicks are back in the Finals and suddenly the city is remembering a time when MetroCards were young, flip phones were powerful, and Ricky Martin had the country living la vida loca. We look back at what New York — and the country — felt like the last time the Knicks were this close to glory, when 1999 was somehow both ancient history and emotionally too recent for Knicks fans.Then we'll also have a closer look at The World Cup Traffic Plan — Or, Midtown Manhattan Being Told to Calm Down, where the city's solution to World Cup chaos appears to be telling cars, trucks, and possibly human beings to stop existing near 42nd Street for several hours. Bus-only lanes, car-free zones, delivery restrictions — Midtown is being put on a behavior plan, and honestly, it probably had this coming.Then later, we ask the question every working person has whispered into a portable fan: It's Gonna Be 90 Degrees Soon… Why Are We Still Working? Because once the temperature hits “sidewalk smells like regret,” productivity should legally turn into survival mode. If the subway platform feels like a toaster oven and your iced coffee becomes room temperature before the first sip, nobody should be expected to answer emails with a positive attitude.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Monday, Mayor Zohran Mamdani did not attend an annual parade honoring Israel, breaking with a decades-long political custom because of his support of Palestinian rights.A chunk of a building facade fell on a teen's head as he walked with his parents in Queens — but an awning may have broken the debris' fall and saved his life, police and a witness said.And authorities in Hawaii have charged a 36-year-old man with murder in the killings of three people in a remote community known for its eclectic, communal lifestyle.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

From the February 3, 2026 unaired episode of The Update Journal, this week's edition is a gentle cry for help wrapped in a sleeping bag.We begin with a camping trip that absolutely did not ask to become a relationship stress test, yet somehow clocked in for overtime anyway. What was supposed to be fresh air, bonding, and maybe one peaceful marshmallow turned into Wi-Fi deprivation, charger diplomacy, sleeping arrangement politics, and the kind of emotional negotiations usually reserved for international summits. Nothing says “quality time” like realizing nature has no outlets, no signal, and apparently no respect for personal space.Then we move from the wilderness to something somehow even more dangerous: TLC's My Strange Addiction ads, which have officially crossed the line from “human curiosity” into “why is this airing while people are eating?” The extended cut gives us raw hamburger meat, bugs, pheromones, and several moments where the television feels less like entertainment and more like a direct threat to dinner. At a certain point, the show stops being a guilty pleasure and becomes a public service announcement for turning the TV off before your appetite files a complaint.It's camping, cravings, questionable programming choices, and one firm reminder: some things are better left unaired… which is probably why this episode was.

In this unaired edition of The Update with Brandon Julien from January 30, 2026, we remember January the only way it deserves: by letting it end without guilt, closure, or a dramatic goodbye montage. No final speech, no sentimental music, no “what did we learn?” moment. January came in loud, stayed too long, and now we are kindly escorting it to the exit.We start with Super Bowl 60, where the matchup may be historic, exciting, and full of storylines—but for Jets fans, it is once again an annual emotional hostage situation. This is the one Sunday where everyone else gets wings, commercials, halftime performances, and hope, while Jets fans find themselves rooting for the meteor because no matter who wins, somehow, some way, they still lose. We take a look at the game, the hype, the fan pain, and why being a Jets fan during Super Bowl season is basically watching your ex thrive on national television.Then we pivot to Law & Order: SVU, where a suspect makes the bold decision to run from the police at the Port Authority, apparently believing the bus terminal was a gateway to freedom, reinvention, and possibly a Greyhound ticket to Florida. Unfortunately, his escape plan hit a scheduling issue—specifically, a bus. We break down the chaos, the very New York energy of the whole thing, and how trying to flee justice through Port Authority is already a bad idea before you even factor in traffic, delays, and the fact that the building itself feels like it has seen too much.And finally, in The Last Word, we close the book on January with the reminder we all needed: the month does not get a performance review, an explanation, or a farewell tour. You do not need to justify how tired you are. You do not need to prove that you used the month correctly. You showed up, you survived, and that is enough. January is not your boss, it is not your landlord, and it is not entitled to a meeting on your calendar. As of this unaired January 30th episode, January is officially off the clock.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we're taking a trip through three very different stages of life: childhood nostalgia, public transit chaos, and the mysterious condition known as "I simply cannot be bothered."First, we go back to a simpler time, when the biggest problem on television was Zack and Cody turning a luxury hotel into a code violation, Raven Baxter seeing the future and somehow making it worse, and every Disney Channel character living a life that would absolutely bankrupt their parents in real life. As Disney rolls out its nostalgia lineup, we revisit the shows that defined an era—and discover that, yes, some of us watched shows that weren't necessarily aimed at us. And no, we're not apologizing for it.Then, we're going to take A Closer Look at a story that somehow gets more ridiculous every time you add another detail. Kids are subway surfing, MTA keys are being sold online, and at some point the world's largest online retailer accidentally wandered into the conversation. It's one of those uniquely New York stories where every answer somehow creates three new questions, and all of them make transit officials reach for aspirin.And in The Last Word, we explore the annual phenomenon where perfectly capable students suddenly develop an inability to open a textbook, answer an email, or care about anything that isn't summer vacation. Medical science refuses to recognize it. Teachers know it's real. Parents know it's real. Students definitely know it's real. And every year, from May through graduation, it spreads faster than a group chat rumor.It's Disney nostalgia, transit nonsense, and academic exhaustion—proof that growing up means going from watching fictional chaos on television to watching real chaos on the evening news.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Friday, A motorized scooter rider slammed head-on into a bicyclist on the Queensboro Bridge, leaving both dead during the Thursday morning rush, police said. Mayor Mamdani is expected to name a former NYPD officer — who made headlines for suing the police department more than a decade ago — to serve as the Big Apple's next sheriff. Ex-Lt. Edwin Raymond is set to be named to the spot as soon as today, according to people with knowledge of the announcement. And out in the American West, crews have recovered the remains of six of nine workers who were missing after a massive chemical tank ruptured at a paper mill in Washington state, releasing a flood of caustic liquid capable of causing severe burns and lung injuries, officials said.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, Disney Channel is dusting off the 2000s like somebody found an old Zack & Cody DVD under the couch cushions. We dive into the June 1st nostalgia lineup and realizes there are apparently entire Disney Channel eras i completely missed. Seriously — at some point Disney quietly switched generations while some of us were still emotionally invested in Wizards of Waverly Place and pretending we'd survive at Camp Rock.Meanwhile, Chibiverse might secretly be the most entertaining thing Disney Channel has produced in years — a chaotic animated fever dream where every character looks adorable while the plots spiral out of control in the best possible way. Somehow this tiny chibi universe understands crossover chaos better than half the entertainment industry.And in Brandon's Take this week: if you step onto a New York City subway car and the air conditioning actually works? Congratulations. You are no longer using public transportation. You are experiencing a luxury wellness retreat on rails. Because nothing humbles a New Yorker faster than opening the door between cars and accidentally walking into what feels like the inside of a toaster oven with handrails.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Thursday, Democratic members of Congress said they observed dire conditions within a federal immigration detention center in New Jersey where protesters have been demonstrating for days and asserting that detainees are on a hunger strike.A teenage girl and her brother were killed when a devastating blaze ripped through a Westchester County home, trapping the pair inside as firefighters raced to rescue them.And out in the American West, crews resumed the grim search for nine people presumed killed at a Washington state paper mill where a chemical tank ruptured a day earlier in one of the deadliest U.S. workplace accidents in years.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

From the unaired January 29, 2026 episode of The Update, Brandon takes a look back at two very different moments that somehow both ask the same question: what happens when the past shows up in the present?First, in “The Same Song, New Verse — Now Featuring Tony Dokoupil's Mom,” Brandon unpacks the ongoing identity crisis at CBS Evening News after Tony Dokoupil ended a broadcast by interviewing his own mother. It's not about his mom — she seems lovely — it's about what happens when a flagship evening newscast starts feeling less like Cronkite's house and more like someone accidentally opened FaceTime during the kicker. With plenty of side-eye, Brandon asks the big media question: what exactly is CBS Evening News trying to be now?Then, in “Sometimes the Past Walks In Through the Door,” a surprise visit from Brandon's former boss Shateka at UD Team sends him down memory lane — back to PAL, camp politics, second chances, blue shirts, Brooklyn summer chaos, and the people who believed in him before the story fully made sense. It's funny, reflective, and a little emotional, because sometimes the past doesn't text first. Sometimes it just walks into work and reminds you how far you've come.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, the Knicks are one win away from the Finals, Cleveland is still launching three-pointers like they're trying to pay rent with them, and apparently New York City lost its outside-watch-party privileges because a few people forgot how to behave near Knicks games. We ask the important questions: Why are the Cavs treating every possession like a heat-check? Why does success in New York immediately turn into a crowd-control situation? And who looked at the calendar and decided Memorial Day weekend should roll directly into Eid al-Adha like this was some kind of holiday back-to-back challenge mode?Also included:A completely unbiased* breakdown of the Knicks-Cavs series from someone who “doesn't even watch basketball like that,” yet somehow has very strong opinions.A public safety reminder that New Yorkers cannot be trusted with nice things once playoff basketball enters the group chat.And a deep investigation into why this week feels like it was scheduled by the same people who plan MTA weekend service changes.(*Bias may exist. Especially against unnecessary three-point attempts.)In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, a tree fell on a woman and partially crushed multiple cars in the Bronx on Memorial Day, cops said. Meanwhile, a wet and not-so-wild Memorial Day capped a washout holiday weekend for the Big Apple, leaving Rockaway Beach empty during the unofficial start of summer except for diehard locals and frustrated business owners.A killer executed a man as he washed clothes with his wife at a Brooklyn laundromat Monday morning, cops and sources said. The brazen gunman also accidentally shot a 68-year-old bystander in the foot in the process, they said.And out in the American west in California, a crack has relieved some pressure in a damaged chemical tank and the temperature of the highly flammable gas inside is continuing to fall, leading authorities to say they believe the risk of a catastrophic explosion has been eliminated.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, after spending way too much time explaining why certain wrestlers are attractive without accidentally sleeping on the couch, i try to process the emotional hangover left behind after the final episode of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert — only for Byron Allen to casually walk into the conversation with comments that somehow made the entire cancellation look even worse. Because apparently when corporate says “this isn't about politics,” and then immediately announces comedy shows with less politics, that's what experts call “not helping your case.”Plus, a reflective Last Word heading into Memorial Day weekend — the unofficial checkpoint before summer where New Yorkers collectively stare into the distance, buy hamburger buns they don't need, and pretend a three-day weekend can repair the psychological damage caused by the last five months.Somewhere between wrestling crush confessions, late-night grief, and remembering what Memorial Day is actually about… this episode completely loses the plot. In the best way possible.In the headlines on #Theupdate this Friday, New York City was pummeled with heavy rain and thunderstorms, leaving stranded drivers forced to seek refuge atop their cars amid violent flash flooding. Meanwhile, the Big Apple's gorgeous, swimsuit-worthy post-Memorial Day weekend forecast looks like a cruel joke after what's expected to be a chilly and rainy holiday weekend, meteorologists said.Several hundred teens and young adults illegally took over a popular New Jersey beach town, sparking chaos in the streets as police arrested several out-of-towners and forced officials to beef up security ahead of Memorial Day weekend.And out in the American west in San Francisco, as we start the road to America's 250th Birthday, when Americans want to show their patriotism, they often don red, white and blue clothing, or sometimes even drape themselves in the U.S. flag. But if you truly want to embody the country's zeitgeist, just slip on your favorite blue jeans. You probably already own at least one pair, just like almost everyone else you know.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, somehow one spring retreat in the woods, the collapse of an entire reality TV empire, and the final episode of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert all ended up sharing the same energy: exhausted people trying to survive organized chaos.We revisit Camp Mason, where the hills were steep, the cabins were legally questionable, and Mr. Charles apparently drove that bus like a man who had already accepted whatever fate awaited him at the top of the mountain. Meanwhile, after years of table-flipping, drink-throwing, and people beginning every sentence with “First of all…”, the era of Love & Hip Hop may finally be winding down — proving that even reality TV eventually runs out of people willing to fight in a restaurant parking lot for six consecutive seasons.And then there's the final episode of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. One last night at the Ed Sullivan Theater before corporate executives replace heartfelt late-night television with whatever spreadsheet-tested nonsense saves them twelve dollars and a yogurt coupon. Somewhere in Midtown, the lights dim, the cue cards fade, and an accountant whispers: “This is what innovation looks like.”In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Thursday, a sinkhole found on a LaGuardia Airport runway led to flight delays, as workers scrambled to make repairs, officials said.Madison Square Garden will not be forced to relocate under a Penn Station redesign plan approved by the Trump administration and Amtrak— with the federal government pledging $8 billion to revamp the decrepit train hub.And out in the American west in New Mexico, three people are dead and more than a dozen first responders had to be quarantined and assessed for possible exposure to an unidentified substance after being called to a suspected drug overdose at a rural home, authorities said.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, Somewhere between the 14th inning of a Mets game, a 97-degree subway platform, and a Memorial Day mattress commercial screaming at you like it's the Super Bowl, we completely lost control of society. We look back at when extra innings used to be a psychological endurance test instead of a pace-of-play inconvenience, why every human being in New York becomes 43% angrier the second the temperature crosses 90 degrees, and how portable fans, ice cups, and corner-store Gatorades suddenly become luxury items. Plus, Brandon's Take on Memorial Day — the strange annual tradition where Americans try to balance honoring veterans while simultaneously financing a sectional couch at 0% APR for 72 months. Welcome to summer in New York, where everybody's sweating, nobody's patient, and somehow the fire hydrant is losing the fight too.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Wednesday, trains are rolling again on the Long Island Rail Road after a deal was reached to end a strike that had shut down the busiest commuter rail system in the U.S.A 56-year-old woman fell into an open maintenance hole on a busy New York City street and died, police and utility officials said as they investigated how it could have happened.And in Miami, the Justice Department is preparing to seek an indictment against former Cuban President Raúl Castro, three people familiar with the matter told The Associated Press, as President Trump threatens possible military action against the communist-run island.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we ask an important question: if the self checkout says “CARD ONLY” in letters large enough to be seen from space… why are people still standing in the human cashier lane paying with Apple Pay like they just cracked the Da Vinci Code?Meanwhile, the universe itself is apparently hanging on by a thread after Stuart from The Big Bang Theory gets access to multiverse technology. Because of course the fate of existence would somehow end up in the hands of the man who could barely keep a comic book store open during normal reality.And in today's Honorable Mention, we dive into the bizarre habits of the ultra-wealthy — including stories so out-of-touch they make regular people sound like survival experts. Nothing humbles you faster than learning there are millionaires who apparently don't know how to use a washing machine, pump gas, or locate a grocery store without a staff meeting.It's confusion at the checkout line, confusion across dimensions, and confusion from people with entirely too much money — which honestly feels like the perfect summary of modern society.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, commuters in New York City's suburbs had to navigate a gauntlet of car, bus and subway routes to get to and from work, with a labor strike shutting down the Long Island Rail Road, the busiest commuter rail system in the country. Meanwhile, Die-hard Knicks fans on Long Island who were psyched up for the hometown hoopsters in the NBA Eastern Conference Finals this week are being forced to stay home or shell out big bucks — thanks to the Long Island Rail Road strike that has grounded thousands.A gun and notebook that prosecutors say link Luigi Mangione to the killing of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson can be used as evidence at his murder trial, a judge ruled, rejecting a defense argument that they were seized illegally.And out in the American West, two teenage shooters opened fire at a San Diego mosque and killed three men before killing themselves a few blocks away, police said. The attack at the Islamic Center of San Diego is being investigated as a hate crime, San Diego Police Chief Scott Wahl said at a news conference at a neighborhood park across from the mosque.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, McDonald's may be preparing to unleash a 100-piece McNuggets box onto society, which naturally raises several important questions — mainly how many Sweet & Sour sauces legally constitute a “serving,” and why every other sauce at McDonald's feels like it's just competing for second place. Meanwhile, Tootsie Roll Industries quietly reveals they've apparently been making other candy products this entire time, sending me into a full existential spiral after spending decades thinking the company's entire business model was just “long chocolate chew logs and vibes.”And finally: with my parents officially away on vacation, the household enters a temporary era of relaxed rules, reduced tension, and suspiciously peaceful energy — much to Tommie's delight. It's less “Home Alone” and more “the pressure cooker finally got its lid loosened before somebody exploded over dishes in the sink.”Basically: nuggets are escalating, candy lore is expanding, and everybody in the house is trying to enjoy the silence before the vacation ends and the routing rigidity returns.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Monday, Federal officials implored unions representing workers for the Long Island Rail Road, North America's largest commuter rail system, to resume bargaining to prevent a long strike from disrupting the week's commute. Meanwhile, Republican gubernatorial candidate Bruce Blakeman called for suspending the $9 congestion pricing toll for motorists crossing into core Manhattan during the Long Island Rail Road strike. We'll have a Brandon's Take and The Last Word on what MTA Chair Janno Lieber said as the strike got underway. In other news, the allegedly drunken driver who killed two men and hurt three others after smashing onto a crowded sidewalk was just two blocks from home when the crash occurred, police said. Elvin Suarez of Morningside Heights was hit with multiple counts of manslaughter, vehicular assault and DWI, cops said.And in Idaho, all four crew members ejected safely after two Navy jets collided during an air show at the Mountain Home Air Force Base, officials said.

Fresh off the bus from Camp Mason and back within range of functioning cell service, The Update returns to New York just in time for Day 2 of the Long Island Rail Road strike — and somehow the situation has only gotten more chaotic.In this special bonus episode, we recap the first full weekend of commuter confusion as packed trains, overflowing buses, bumper-to-bumper traffic, and exhausted riders continue to test the patience of the entire region. We break down the latest negotiations, the political finger-pointing, and the growing realization that Memorial Day weekend is now lurking around the corner like a jump scare nobody prepared for.It's a road-weary, city-stressed, caffeine-powered bonus edition of The Update — because even after a weekend away, New York always finds a way to pull you right back into the madness.

The Update goes fully mobile for a special bonus episode from deep in the woods of Camp Mason — where the Wi-Fi is questionable, the wildlife is aggressive, and somehow we're still covering one of the biggest transit meltdowns in the tri-state area.On Day 1 of the Long Island Rail Road strike, we break down the commuter chaos unfolding back home as riders scramble for buses, ferries, carpools, emotional support iced coffees, and whatever remaining patience they still had left before Memorial Day weekend. From packed highways to packed tempers, we try to make sense of the first major rail shutdown in years… using whatever limited resources we can find between camp activities and cabins that sound like they were built during the Roosevelt administration.Meanwhile at Citi Field, Game 1 of the Subway Series took a brutal turn as Mets pitcher Clay Holmes suffered a fractured fibula in a frightening injury that could sideline him for a very long time. We react to the game, the atmosphere in Queens, and what this means for a Mets team that already felt like it was being held together with athletic tape, vibes, and pure delusion.It's a special on-the-road edition of The Update — proving once again that whether we're in Studio 57 or surviving camp life in New Jersey, the news never stops… even if the trains do.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, apparently I've spent most of my life attending cookouts without actually participating in them. We're talking barbecue blindness, the shocking realization that people have been eating brisket and ribs recreationally for years.Then, one piece of fried chicken and a can of Squirt turned into a full existential crisis. Because now I'm sitting here wondering what other flavors I've missed. Is there a secret underground beverage society? Have the rest of you been gatekeeping cream sodas and regional fruit drinks while I've been out here drinking the same three things since 2009?Plus, in The Last Word: we're “roughing it” at Camp Mason for the Urban Dove spring overnight retreat—which mostly means pretending sleeping in a cabin is fun while every bug in New Jersey files a formal request to enter the building. “Getting closer to nature” sounds beautiful until nature starts scratching at the screen door at 2 in the morning.So: meat confessions, soda discoveries, and camping with a carefully managed exit strategy. Because yes, we're outdoors… but we are also counting the days until we're back at home base before Memorial Day weekend.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Friday, An Long Island Rail Road strike could strand nearly 300,000 commuters starting this weekend as five labor unions and MTA leaders are at odds over wage increases for the union workers. At the same time, an electrical fire erupted on the Amtrak tracks at Penn Station, snarling service into the major Midtown hub, officials said. LIRR service was also impacted by the fire, with delays, cancellations and skipped stops reported on multiple lines, according to the MTA's website.Big Apple retailers narrowly avoided having to shell out tens of thousands of dollars in upgrades to their roll-gown gates — as the city has temporarily paused its attempt to begin enforcing an obscure, decades-old law mandating changes to the security barriers this summer.And overseas, China's Xi Jinping warned President Trump that their two countries could clash over Taiwan if the issue is not handled properly, an unusually harsh admonition that stood in contrast to the American leader's praise for his counterpart.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, apparently the universe has decided that patience is no longer a required life skill. First, we dive into the absolute emotional warfare known as UNO: No Mercy — because regular UNO apparently wasn't destroying enough friendships already. Somewhere along the line, somebody looked at Draw Fours and said, “You know what this family game needs? Psychological damage.”Then we head underground into the daily survival simulator known as the NYC subway system — where the sound of a construction horn instantly translates to: “Congratulations. Your commute is now being held together with duct tape and prayers.” We'll talk track fires, earlier incidents, residual delays, reroutes, and that exact moment every New Yorker realizes: “Yeah… I'm not getting home anytime soon.”And finally, in today's Honorable Mention, Ralph Lauren unveils an America 250 stamp collection celebrating “icons” — because nothing says patriotism quite like fashionable postage arriving while the rest of us are stuck between stations wondering if the Q train still believes in itself.Friendships were tested. Trains were delayed. America got commemorative stamps. Just another normal day in New York.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Thursday, a chunk of debris fell from an overpass on the Cross Bronx Expressway – striking a car below and injuring one person, the FDNY said. The incident comes just days after another incident where another massive piece of debris fell, nearly crushing another driver.A man pleaded guilty to repeatedly ramming his car into the Chabad Lubavitch world headquarters in New York City, telling a judge he did so because he was intent on damaging the Jewish landmark.And in South Carolina, Alex Murdaugh's murder convictions and life sentence for the deaths of his wife and son were overturned by the South Carolina Supreme Court because the court clerk at his trial suggested he was guilty.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

We've done a lot of episodes throughout our many years of #TheUpdate, but some of them are my personal favorites. Every month, we're going to go into The Update vault and play one episode from my personal list of favorite episodes. I hope you enjoy them as much as i did hosting it.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… the rulebook officially leaves the chat.We dive into the completely unhinged world of Banana Ball — where bunting is apparently a federal offense, fans can record outs from the stands, and baseball finally asked the question: “What if we let the theater kids run the league?” Somewhere, traditional baseball executives are currently stress-eating sunflower seeds in silence.Then, we take a confusing detour into “Halfway to Halloween,” because candy companies have apparently decided spooky season now begins shortly after Easter. Nothing says “summer is coming” quite like seeing skeleton-shaped Twix bars while you're still paying off Memorial Day cookout expenses. Candy now operates on its own fiscal calendar, and frankly, Spirit Halloween is probably already scouting abandoned Rite Aid locations as we speak.And in Brandon's Take: Teacher Appreciation Week… with teacher expectations. Because while free bagels and tote bags are nice, teachers are still somehow expected to be educators, therapists, security guards, tech support, event planners, and miracle workers before 8 AM. We appreciate teachers so much that we reward them with pizza… and three new responsibilities.Basically, today's episode asks one very important question: Did society quietly become a parody of itself while we were distracted?In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Wednesday, the horrific Inwood fire that killed three people, including a top veteran fashion journalist and her elderly mother, was caused by a neighbor who carelessly flicked his cigarette butt, prosecutors said.The estranged husband of a prominent New York City art dealer said he wished his spouse was dead before the co-owner of a contemporary art gallery was found stabbed to death in his Brazilian townhouse, a witness testified as a murder-for-hire trial got underway in Manhattan.And in Baltimore, prosecutors announced criminal charges in the deadly 2024 collapse of Baltimore's Francis Scott Key Bridge, accusing a Singapore-based ship operator of intentionally relying on an improper fuel pump that contributed to the ruinous crash and then lying about it to investigators.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we try to figure out what a “sudachi” actually is after Red Bull dropped a new summer flavor that sounds less like an energy drink and more like a spa treatment. Meanwhile, 7-Eleven has apparently decided they no longer want to just sell you late-night taquitos — they now want to cater your entire family gathering with taco bars, pizza, and breakfast sandwiches served under fluorescent lighting and emotional uncertainty. And finally, we dive into the Disney cruise nightmare where passengers boarded the ship ready for paradise… only to be told “actually never mind” and kicked off thousands of miles from home like the world's most expensive game of musical chairs. Summer 2026 is off to an aggressively weird start.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, a baby was killed, and 6-year-old twins were left in critical condition, when a fire tore through a Bronx apartment building according to authorities and sources.An accused heartless real-estate scammer landed on trial for allegedly swiping two Manhattan brownstones from their owners — including an 83-year-old woman who ended up in a shelter collecting cans.And in Washington, The U.S. Supreme Court set the stage for Alabama to eliminate one of two largely Black congressional districts before this year's midterm elections, creating an opening for Republicans to gain an additional U.S. House seat in a partisan battle for control of the closely divided chamber.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… Heinz decided mayonnaise needed a passport and sent it on a full international vacation exclusively through Walmart, because apparently regular mayo just wasn't cultured enough anymore. From Japanese-inspired Ginger Sesame to Hawaiian Tropical Teriyaki, we try to figure out when condiments became exchange students.Then… Saturday morning took a hard left turn when a routine viewing of NCIS somehow led to a promo for This Is Poly on WE tv… resulting in one very important question being yelled at the television: “What the f*ck am I watching?”And finally, after the mayo confusion and reality TV emotional whiplash, we slow things down for a post-Mother's Day tribute — for Mom, for every mom, for the women who held everything together when nobody realized how much they were carrying, and for those we miss a little extra this time of year.So basically: international condiments, television-induced confusion, and feelings. Just another normal edition of The Update Journal.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Monday, An NYC commuter narrowly dodged death in the tunnel under the Bridge Apartments when he was suddenly confronted by a massive piece of falling debris.The maniac accused of pushing a 76-year-old man down a flight of Manhattan subway stairs to his death appeared in an NYC court just hours after the heinous attack — and strolled out, because no one realized he was the killer.And passengers evacuated from the hantavirus-hit cruise ship began flying home aboard military and government planes after the vessel anchored in the Canary Islands, where travelers were escorted to shore by personnel in full-body protective gear and breathing masks.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… Chick-fil-A has apparently decided the only way to get people to look up from their phones during dinner is to dangle ice cream in front of them like a reward for good behavior. Meanwhile, the internet has once again discovered that the Minions are all male because apparently chaos, goggles, and workplace incompetence are “guy energy.” And in The Last Word, a reminder that progress doesn't always arrive with fireworks, dramatic music, or a life-changing montage. Sometimes progress is just answering one email, surviving one bad day, or not throwing your phone across the room after hearing the phrase “Cell Phone Coop Challenge.” Small wins still count. Even if your reward is only a tiny vanilla cone and emotional stability.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Friday, people who buy luxurious second homes in New York City, but live most of the year elsewhere, would have to pay a new tax on the properties under a tentative agreement — an initiative to appease Mayor Mamdani and liberal voters who launched him into office with chants of “tax the rich.”President Trump's border czar has threatened to “ flood the zone ” with immigration agents if New York passes bills to limit local coordination with the federal government's crackdown.And in Tennessee, amid raucous protests, Republicans in Tennessee enacted a new U.S. House map that carves up a majority-Black district in Memphis, reshaping it to the GOP's advantage as part of President Trump's strategy to hold on to a slim majority in the November midterm elections.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… society officially spun the wheel and landed on chaos. Honestly, this entire lineup feels like it was generated by an AI that was fed snacks, nostalgia, and burnout.We'll talk about the new Ultimate Garlic Parm Doritos — a chip flavor that sounds less like a snack and more like something served at a rooftop restaurant in Queens with exposed brick and a $21 mocktail menu. We'll also get into why Toy Story 5 being rated PG feels oddly emotional for people who grew up hearing Tom Hanks reassure us that everything would be okay.And finally, we examine the rise of the professional cuddler economy — because apparently in 2026, emotional support is now a freelance career path with benefits. Somewhere, exhausted teachers across America are reading that headline while clutching their coffee mugs like they've just seen the gates of heaven open.It's comfort food, comfort movies, and literal comfort as a service… today on The Update Journal. In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Thursday, a note Jeffrey Epstein's former cellmate claimed he found after the financier's first suspected jail suicide attempt was made public after it had been sealed and locked in a courthouse vault for nearly five years as part of an unrelated legal dispute.A 28-year-old woman impersonated a student at a New York City high school for two weeks until educators became suspicious and police arrested her, according to a criminal complaint.And Ted Turner could never be defined by just one role. He was a media mogul, philanthropist and conservationist. A yachtsman who won boating's most famous race and owner of a baseball team that captured the World Series trophy. The brash television pioneer who died at the age of 87 made his greatest mark on the news business when he launched CNN nearly a half-century ago and with it, the 24-hour cable news cycle — a revolutionary moment that transformed the industry.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… a simple trip to the bathroom turned into a full existential crisis after Sunset Citrus Margarita soap from Bath & Body Works smelled so much like an actual drink that I briefly questioned whether I should pour it over ice and serve it with tortilla chips. At what point did soap stop smelling “clean” and start smelling like the appetizer menu at a rooftop restaurant in Queens?Meanwhile, we say goodbye to Spirit Airlines — the airline that charged you extra for blinking too hard, but somehow managed to fly for years with zero fatalities. Sure, your knees were in your chest, your carry-on bag needed financing, and the boarding process felt like supermarket sweepstakes… but they got people where they needed to go. Eventually. Usually. And honestly, there's something beautiful about surviving a Spirit flight and immediately texting your family, “Landed safely. Never again.”And in Brandon's Take: Decision Day arrives for high school seniors — the magical 24-hour period where teenagers make the most expensive button click of their lives while pretending they totally understand student loans. Nothing says “adulthood” like committing to four years of stress and debt while your family asks, “So… are you excited?” through tears and FAFSA paperwork.It's soap that smells edible, airlines that somehow became lovable on the way out, and the annual tradition of emotionally purchasing your future — because anything can happen in New York.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Wednesday, A 39-year-old man was stabbed to death in an attack near the heart of Times Square, cops said. An airliner approaching John F. Kennedy Airport and a small propeller plane came within 500 feet of each other— at least the second close call near the Queens travel hub in two weeks.And in Washington, President Trump revived the Presidential Physical Fitness Award as part of his push to return an annual physical fitness test to America's schools.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we take a bold step into the future… by pressing every single button in the studio and hoping nothing explodes. The Information Center got an upgrade, which means the setup looks sleeker, more professional— and significantly more confusing. There are lights, switches, panels, and at least one button that we're pretty sure launches something. The producers say it's “intuitive.” I say it's a trust exercise.Meanwhile, pour one out for Ask.com, as Jeeves officially clocks out for the last time. The internet's most polite butler has retired, leaving behind a generation of us who once thought asking a full sentence question online was revolutionary. No autocomplete, no algorithms judging you—just vibes, and Jeeves quietly finding your answer like the digital gentleman he was. We didn't appreciate him enough. We really didn't.And just when you think the world has moved on from simpler times, Kellogg's hits us with the ultimate nostalgia bait: cereal box toys are back. Yes, inside the box. Not a QR code. Not a “scan here to download disappointment.” A real toy. Suddenly, adults everywhere are emotionally invested in breakfast again, trying to justify buying sugary cereal “for the memories” while absolutely fighting a child in the aisle over the last box with a prize.So whether you're decoding a new studio control panel (like me), saying goodbye to a butler who deserved better, or rediscovering the pure joy of free stuff in a cereal box—just know this: progress is great… but sometimes, the old stuff was doing just fine.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, a fire broke out in the Broadway theater that hosts “The Book of Mormon,” forcing the long-running musical to close, at least temporarily, as the historic venue undergoes repairs.Three people died and more than a dozen were injured after a massive fire tore through a six-floor walk-up in Manhattan, officials said.And in Washington, The Supreme Court restored broad access to the abortion pill mifepristone, blocking a lower-court ruling that had threatened to upend one of the main ways abortions are provided across the nation.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we start on a note that genuinely feels like the end of something big. John Sterling has died at the age of 87, officially closing the microphone on a voice that didn't just call Yankees games—it was Yankees baseball for generations. Even if you weren't a Yankees fan (hi, yes, that's me), you knew the calls. You heard the home runs. You waited for the signature flair. And somehow, baseball is going to sound a little quieter without him… which feels wrong, because nothing about John Sterling was ever quiet.Then, because the universe has absolutely no concept of emotional pacing, tonight is the Met Gala. Yes, that Met Gala. The one where fashion reaches a level that I can only describe as “artistic confusion with a budget.” Every year I try to understand it. Every year I fail. I'm sure it's brilliant. I'm also sure someone will be dressed like a chandelier with a backstory.And finally—Cinco de Mayo is tomorrow. Tomorrow. It snuck up so fast it feels like it skipped the group chat and just showed up at the door with chips and salsa like, “Hope you're ready.” No buildup, no warning—just vibes.Just another completely normal day in New York.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Monday, Federal authorities are investigating after a United Airlines passenger jet landing at Newark Liberty International Airport struck a light pole on the adjacent New Jersey Turnpike.Rudolph Giuliani, the ex-mayor of New York City and a former adviser to President Donald Trump, is in critical but stable condition at a hospital, his spokesman said.And in Florida, President Trump said that he was reviewing a new Iranian proposal to end the war but also expressed skepticism it would lead to a deal.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… the calendar says May 1st, but emotionally? We're somewhere between late August burnout and mid-October sports-induced heartbreak. The Mets spent April reminding us that hope is a dangerous game, and Mets fans once again finding creative new ways to say “it's early” through gritted teeth. Meanwhile, over on Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, Olivia Benson gets hit with a punishment so confusing it makes you question if the writers spun a wheel labeled “accountability” and just went with whatever it landed on.And just when the chaos starts to feel like too much, we close things out with a gentle reminder: unclench your jaw, lower your blood pressure, and remember… it is literally the first day of May.Plenty of time for things to get worse. Or better. Probably worse. In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Friday, a massive, fiery explosion at a house in Queens sent several NYPD officers flying through the air as they were responding to a call of a man inside armed with a knife and the smell of gas.At the Harvey Weinstein retrial, his accuser struggled on the witness stand after being confronted with a previously undisclosed, soul-searching note she wrote to herself two days after the alleged assault in 2013. And in Washington, President Trump swiftly signed a bipartisan legislation to fund much of the Department of Homeland Security, but not its immigration enforcement operations, shortly after the package won final approval in the House, ending the longest agency shutdown in history.

Hello everyone! We're going into #TheUpdate vault to play one of our many episodes throughout our many years of the show. For today's episode, we go into the world of Year 5 of The Update. When we first started this then-show at WKRB in 2017, the first year had a lot of things going on. Donald Trump's first year in office, mass shootings worldwide, and the Great American Solar Eclipse to name just a few. In Year 5, it was more of the same. There was the Russian war in Ukraine, more mass shootings in America, and the overturning of Roe V. Wade to name just a few that we'll mention. But also, after more than two years out on the road, we made our way to a new studio at UD Team in the summer of 2022. Oh, and one last thing- be on the lookout for some WKRB highlights as we looked back on five years of memories.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… we start on a New York City bus, where one perfectly timed (and completely unnecessary) “Stop Requested” moment sends me spiraling into a nearly 20-year-old memory I didn't ask to revisit—but somehow remembered in full HD.Then, we head over to the cartoon justice system, where getting unmasked by Scooby-Doo apparently comes with an automatic life sentence. Petty real estate scheme? Straight to maximum security. Mildly elaborate disguise? No parole. Honestly, the real mystery is how NONE of these villains ever hired a lawyer.And finally, just when you thought clearing your browser history was only about hiding embarrassment… turns out it might actually be saving you money. Because yes—airlines may be watching you refresh that flight page like it's a playoff game, and responding accordingly.It's nostalgia, injustice, and algorithmic side-eyes—all in one ride. No transfer required.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Thursday, King Charles III and Queen Camilla visited the site of the Sept. 11 attacks, met with schoolchildren and business titans and socialized with celebrities during a busy swing through New York City— the first visit to the city by a reigning British monarch in 16 years.Transponders that might have helped pinpoint the location of a fire truck that collided with a landing Air Canada jet in New York will soon be installed on ground vehicles at the region's three major airports.And in Washington, The Supreme Court hollowed out a landmark Civil Rights-era law that has increased minority representation in Congress and elsewhere, striking down a majority Black congressional district in Louisiana and opening the door for more redistricting across the country that could aid Republican efforts to control the House.

In today's edition of The Update Journal… McDonald's has officially decided that burgers were just the opening act, and now they're coming for your entire beverage identity. Cold foam, refreshers, mystery fruit combinations… at this point, they're one oat milk away from opening inside a yoga studio.Meanwhile, the ice cream truck economy is booming again, which means Mr. Softee is back on the streets like a seasonal superhero—serving joy, playing that one song on loop, and charging prices that suggest inflation hit soft serve personally.And then there's Brandon's Take, where we ask the important question: why is EVERYTHING exclusive now? Want to watch a game? Exclusive. Want a deal? App only. Want basic access to anything without downloading, subscribing, or sacrificing your firstborn? Yeah… good luck with that.It's a world of cold drinks, cold cash, and even colder access—and somehow, we're all just expected to tap the app and smile.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Wednesday, the goon accused of gunning down a beloved East Village deli worker was rounded up in a massive federal gang takedown a decade ago — and came back to allegedly terrorize the neighborhood.The woman at the center of Harvey Weinstein ‘s repeatedly retried rape case testified — for the third time — Tuesday that the former Hollywood honcho trapped her in a New York hotel room and assaulted her, ignoring her pleas not to do anything sexual.And in Washington, King Charles III marked the 250th anniversary of American independence from Britain with gratitude that the two countries united to build “one of the most consequential alliances in human history” while urging “that we ignore the clarion calls to become ever more inward-looking.”

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we begin by doing something rarely seen in sports discourse: not blaming the guy holding the lineup card. Carlos Mendoza hasn't been fired yet, but may become the latest victim of the “fire him and figure it out later” strategy, even though he didn't build the roster, break the bullpen, or personally tell hitters to forget how bats work. But sure—let's start there.Then it's another edition of Great Ideas- On Paper. It's one of life's greatest scams: bus WiFi. It's always there. It's always available. And yet somehow, it has the emotional support of a dead goldfish. You can connect… but spiritually, you're on your own.Then later, in today's Honorable Mention, we take a brief and slightly concerned look at the internet continuing to be the internet, as an OnlyFans creator reveals the strangest requests she's received—which raises the important question: who are these people, and why do they have disposable income?It's confusion, deflection, and questionable life choices… all in one place.In the headlines on #TheUpdate this Tuesday, A man convicted in the 2024 shooting death of an NYPD officer during a traffic stop will spend the rest of his life behind bars after a judge sentenced him to 115 years to life in prison.A teenage straphanger was shot while he was riding a Queens-bound A train, police say.And in Washington, the man who authorities say tried to storm the White House Correspondents' Association dinner with guns and knives was charged with the attempted assassination of President Trump as federal authorities suggested an attack that disrupted one of Washington's glitziest events had been planned for at least several weeks.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we begin in Queens—yes, Queens—where the Mets managed to hit rock bottom at home, getting swept in a doubleheader by the Rockies… a team that treats winning like it's an optional side quest. At Citi Field, no less. Nothing says “home field advantage” like personally hosting your own downfall. At this point, the only thing elevated wasn't the Rockies—it was the collective blood pressure of everyone in the building.Then, love is dead—again. Megan Thee Stallion and Klay Thompson have called it quits, proving that even a Splash Brother can't always stay afloat. Somewhere, Stephen Curry is shaking his head like, “This is why we keep our shots behind the arc… and out of relationships.”And finally, we wrap it up with a tribute to the most dangerous sentence in the English language: “This felt like a good idea at the time.” Whether it's trusting public WiFi, using your last challenge in the first inning, or thinking the Mets might salvage one game at home—today is a celebration of bold decisions… immediately followed by regret.It's messy, it's painful, and somehow… it's still funny.In the healdines on #TheUpdate this Monday, a late night argument outside a Manhattan deli turned deadly — leaving one man shot dead and another wounded, cops and sources say. A 16-year-old boy was shot and killed at a Brooklyn bodega during a deadly clash with another teen, according to police and the store's manager.And out in the American West in California, the man arrested in the shooting at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner is a highly educated tutor and amateur video game developer opposed to the policies of President Trump.

In today's edition of The Update Journal, we ask the important questions: how rich do you have to be to unlock unlimited McDonald's like it's a secret level in a video game—and more importantly, who do we need to fight to get one? Meanwhile, Maury is apparently coming back to television, because nothing says “progress” like a lie detector, a manila envelope, and someone sprinting backstage in tears.And as for me? I'm out here on Senior Retreat, surrounded by nature, fresh air, and just enough silence to make me deeply uncomfortable. No city noise, no chaos… no Tommie. Which means I'm left alone with my thoughts—and that's never gone well for anyone involved.Enjoy this bonus editon of The Update, on the road from Senior Retreat, featuring the Mets surviving a ninth-inning bullpen mix-up when Huascar Brazobán went to the mound as closer Devin Williams started walking in, then hung on to beat the Twins behind Bo Bichette's tiebreaking, three-run double for their second straight win after a 12-game skid.And in Oklahoma, a powerful tornado ripped roofs off buildings and reduced others to rubble, knocked down power poles and sent emergency crews rushing into a rural community near Vance Air Force Base, officials said.