Cthulhu on Parade!

Yes, the rumours were true! Two weeks ago, the Wretched Beast, Stephen, and their friends (of the show) Will M, JJ Hawkins (@JJHawkins on Twitter) and Aaron Fever (@AaronFever) joined together with a dark purpose: to play the roleplaying game Call of Cthulhu. In this session, we attend an auction, and board a train! Featuring: The Wretched Beast as Games Master Stephen as Beauford Loren-Smith, hot-blooded dilettante. Aaron Fever as Arthur Francis Allen, grumpy scholar of the occult. JJ Hawkins as Rebecca Church, stoic private investigator. Will M as Ingrid Hamm, artist with shady connections. Theme music: Kaissa (Karpov Not Kasparov) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Join us in fright this Hallowe'en season as we take our first foray into the terrifying depths of an unfamiliar RPG system - Trail of Cthulhu! Specifically, with the scenario "Dr. Grave Dust" from the book Shadows Over Filmland. I was a little tired when running this one. Are the results too on-rails, or simply off the rails? You decide! Also, Al (@PrimitiveManPrd) from The Film Room Podcast (@FilmRoomCast) was on this episode! We literally immediately spoil last Halloween's Wrong Turn/Guestpocalypse episodes, so uh, watch out for that. Part two coming soon! Featuring: Will B as Game Master Al as Sebastian Church, debonair gentleman thief with an eye for adventure. Sam as Sylvia Paris, armed and extremely dangerous private eye. Stephen as Dr. Alex Laborie, a distinguished man of medicine. Will M as Daphne "Igor" Valentino, author of a cult hit series of novels. Theme music: Teenagers Battle The Thing (Various Artists [Chinstrap Music]) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

It's grim up north as we brave the fierce colds, biting winds and salty sea air to fetch you another exciting episode of Cthulhu on Parade! This time, we played the Fiasco playset known as "Last Frontier" (available here: http://fiascoplaysets.com/home/last-frontier). It was a good time! For reference, "Trent Reznor" is a musician from the band "Nine Inch Nails". Thanks. Featuring: Will M as Daryl Stogely, a mysterious yet ornery hermit and man of the sea. Will B as Jack Bowwer, member of the boat crew cursed with terrible gifts. Sam as Karen, member of the boat crew emerging from the wreckage of a failed relationship. Plus, some other characters! Theme music: Lady Allright (David Szesztay) / CC BY-NC 3.0

A scant ten months (or so) since our last adventure, we're back with an all-new Fiasco episode! It's trouble by the Thames as we play "Gangster London" (available here: http://bullypulpitgames.com/fiasco-companion-gangster-london-writers-edition/). In this episode, we push timeline stability to the limit, and do a bunch of accents of varying quality, including several celebrity voices! Can -you- tell who we're trying to be, or what we're trying to say? Good luck, and enjoy! Featuring: Will B as Gary Nichols, loving husband and secretive businessman. Also, Ace Wellman - and more! Stephen as Jonathan Wellman, a sous-chef with a troubled family. Also, Liz "Leslie" Nichols - and more! Will M as Neville Wilkinson, ambitious restaurant pioneer with a dark secret. Also, Ace Wellman (same one) - and more! Just how many more? Listen to find out! Theme music: Coffee Shop (David Szesztay) / CC BY-NC 3.0

We return to playing "Wrong Turn" from Cthulhu Britannica in this all-new episode! Questions are answered, secrets are revealed! Introductions are made sooner and the game starts practically immediately! By all measures, a true Cthulhu on Parade Classic Episode. Enjoy, and Happy Hallowe'en! Or, other holidays, depending on when you listen to this. INFO UPDATE: Al (@PrimitiveManPrd) from The Film Room Podcast (@FilmRoomCast on Twitter, and check it out here) JJ Hawkins (@JJHawkins) of Mars Needs Podcasts fame (and a couple others over at www.TheWebsiteOfDoom.com and beyond) Oh, and introducing Stephen. Again. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Al as Trevor Green, audiovisual engineer and consummate professional. JJ as Simon Court, producer with a high self-image and a new lease on life. Stephen as Michael Vince, new junior technician and amateur scriptwriter. Will M as Katherine Belmarsh, sent from Head Office to check on the team. Theme music is Burn by Room For A Ghost (http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Room_For_A_Ghost/3_Song_EP/room_for_a_ghost_-__burn)

Yes, in this exciting Hallowe'en Spooktacular/Guestpocalypse edition of the podcast, we return to regale you with much talk of the X-Men (and general Marvel characters), a bold re-imagining of Waiting for Godot as Will M fails to show up, and another guest's bad internet connection results in their banishment to the wasteland (but which one? listen to find out!). We also make a bunch of inside references and talk much of how the sausage is made, podcast-wise. And also, in a manner of spooking, how the dirty pyramid is made as well. Oh, did I mention that we played the scenario "Wrong Turn" from Cthulhu Britannica? Well, we did. This one's a two-parter, so expect the gripping finale soon! Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Al as Trevor Green, audiovisual engineer and consummate professional. JJ as Simon Court, producer with a high self-image. Jon as Daniel "Danny" Morris, sound engineer and a man with much to say. Stephen as Michael Vince, new junior technician and amateur scriptwriter. Theme music is Burn by Room For A Ghost (http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Room_For_A_Ghost/3_Song_EP/room_for_a_ghost_-__burn)

Into every generation, an episode of Cthulhu on Parade! is born. Will you pass on the legacy to your own children someday? Perhaps, in the meantime, we may discuss such things as the endless nature of time. Were one to become unstuck in it, what actions would one take? In this frightening grounded episode, we explore the effects of temporal traversal on three brave souls, each hoping that the next leap will be the one that takes them home at last. Also, Will M guest-edited this episode. Oh, wait, and did I mention that this entire thing is a game that our very own Sam made? I guess I didn't, and I know that I didn't, and were I to become unstuck in time, I would surely hope to travel back to the moments before writing this and set right this terrible wrong. But, alas, we must move ever onward in time, and look only to the fantastic fiction of these three strange sojourners, wondering what we would will to existence in their place. Featuring: Sam as GM Stephen as Thomas “Tommy” Quartermaine Chisum, slick-haired, smooth talkin' 50s greaser with an eye on the ladies. Will B as Chester McHaverton, driven former TV personality, erstwhile animal expert (for tigers). Will M as Reginald Foxtington, a very old man with a very young outlook (that is not averse to misdemeanors).

What does the Cthulhu on Parade crew think World War II was like? What do they think venereal diseases are? What accent is anyone doing? None of these questions are answered in today's Fiasco playset: Lucky Strike (available here: http://www.bullypulpitgames.com/wiki/index.php?title=Lucky_Strike). Of note: the term “repple depple” is introduced and found tragically unfunny, Sam gets to add “does rat voices” to her resume and Will rises from the grave. This episode guest-edited by Will M. Also, he wrote this! Well, I wrote this bit acknowledging him. Hi everyone, I'm Will B. How're you doing? You look great, by the way. Is that a new haircut? I love it. Featuring: Stephen as Anthony Tromba, Quarter Master leaving no quarters unmastered. Will B as Red Smoulders, Lifting Weights and loving America. Will M as Martin “D'agony” D'agnieuw, returning character? Sam as Annie Deutschelover, Squire of Sources. Theme Music: “Prince Eugene March” by Bruno Antonio Buike (https://www.jamendo.com/en/track/1033893/prince-eugene-march-bbwv6) Licensed under Creative Commons https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/

Dance once more upon the stars of madness with our heroic paragons of sleuthery! With strange visitors approaching, are our disastrous duo up to the task of detaining old man Harney Rooger? Will they even make it off the mountain alive? Also, what's a sanity roll? This episode, like the last, was guest-edited by Stephen, so I can only apologise for the extended pre-game chat that has been left in for your listening pleasure. However, it's pretty good pre-game chat, you guys. Okay bye. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Stephen as Deputy Robert Mayor, a detective of extreme verisimilitude. Will M as Officer Opie Plum, who works together with Deputy Mayor, knowing him extremely well, including his name. Theme Music by... Will M?

For many years, mankind has believed itself to be the dominant form of life on the planet, but no more! Yes, on this day in the 1920s (sometime) a shocking revelation was made! In the course of a routine investigation, two cops stumble upon a mysterious happening in a rural locale, but this time, there's teens! And the police work is stellar. INTERSTELLAR? I'm saying that maybe the things involved could be to do with space. I dunno it's a real secret unless you read the name of the episode or the Call of Cthulhu rulebook at any point, but we put a few new spins on the old classic, such as incompetence. Also I called out an iTunes review I was annoyed about, because that's the kind of egomaniac I've become. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Stephen as Deputy Robert Mayor, a detective of extreme verisimilitude. Will M as Officer Opie Plum, who works together with Deputy Mayor, knowing him extremely well, including his name. Theme Music by, uh, original composition by us. Special thanks to LMFAO.

Gentle listeners, allow me to introduce to you another episode of the podcast you have grown to listen to perhaps these many years, perhaps just recently. Maybe this is your first time listening. Or maybe you'll skip this one, in which case, I thank you for your patience in reading this. But suppose you -don't- skip this episode. Suppose, instead, you were to download it, or stream it online? Or purchase it on CD in one of your popular record stores? What could one hope to hear in such an episode as this? Set aside your fears for the future. In this tale, we examine the lives of three promising (sorta) students at an established wizarding school/business college in London, where dark forces are amassing, and there's a shady-looking potions teacher, but it's entirely legally distinct from any other school of a similar nature because it's also a business college and it's called Hogwash. Also there's a bit that I cut from the beginning where I made a mildly offensive attempt at humour which you shall never be permitted to hear, but kinda sets up a whole thing throughout the episode, so... Enjoy that? Anyway, the main good thing is that Sam came back for this so it's great, also secondly we apologize for some audio issues regarding that. Alright, now, enjoy the... Enjoy the episode, I guess? Bye! Featuring: Sam as Alex Lake, emo-haired loner and a rebel without a cause. A whiz kid. Stephen as Ronnie the Bear, technically inept whiz kid with one eye trained on the almighty dollar/pound. Will B as Thomas Quincy Jones, the whiz kid of the bunch, with a future in business. Or magic. Or magic business. Theme Music is Gaslamp Funworks by Kevin MacLeod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100826)

Book your tickets! A brand new episode of Cthulhu on Parade has risen from the depths to challenge your entire philosophy on update schedules, a bold new artform only matched by the sheer talent on display by our glorious heroes. Yes, the rumours are true and this episode features a brand new player never-before-heard on this podcast. Who will it be? Why, the only way to find out is to listen! Or, scroll down and see on the featuring list I guess. But what will they sound like? So anyway in this episode we played Transatlantic, a Fiasco playset, and referenced Too Many Cooks a lot, to the extent where within a month (this episode was recorded a month ago almost exactly) some things may feel outdated. But also, it's kinda like Titanic? And that's a timeless classic/historical event. My point is that there's layers here. Also it's pretty funny. So, listen to it maybe? This episode was edited by Stephen. Featuring: Sarah as Anastasia Steele, a bold young woman with revenge on her horizon. Stephen as Steven Popkes/Poptarts, steward on the rise, a dangerous man. Will B as Betty Winchester, heiress to an unbelievable fortune. Will M as Daniel Day-Lewis (no relation), a steward with a treacherous past. Theme Music is Row Your Boat by i2b (http://ccmixter.org/files/i2b5k0/31655)

Join us this evening on a four-and-a-quarter hour journey into the soul of man. When colluding forces bring together a band of misfits (eventually, because for the first while it's kinda hard to get them into a room together due to poor planning on my part) – what fine discoveries shall they make in a bold new archaeological dig, which is definitely very interesting? Everyone's talking about this hill. This hill with weird earthworks? You – you gotta listen, man. This hill. You've never heard anything like it. There's all kinds of historical artefacts getting uncovered. And our bold adventurers are gonna uncover them, and – and take a look at them, and like, take a couple guesses as to what might be going on. Then they're gonna go get drunk. All for two pounds a day! This episode is an extra-special GUESTRAVAGANZA, with special guests such as Austin & Al from The Film Room Podcast (@FilmRoomCast on Twitter, and check it out at http://thefilmroom.podbean.com/) to say nothing of returning champion JJ Hawkins (@JJHawkins) of Mars Needs Podcasts fame (and a couple others over at http://www.TheWebsiteOfDoom.com) – and last but not least, a very special guest appearance from a loudly whining dog for much of the last hour, for which I can only apologize. Now get on your listening boots and hear the earth shake, for the newest ever episode of Cthulhu on Parade! (We played The Writhing Hill, from Cthulhu Britannica: Folklore) Oh! I almost forgot to mention, this episode features a staggering lack of knowledge on my part about the geography of basically anything. Uh, sorry? Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Al as Garry Trudeau, local law enforcement. No relation. Well, maybe some I guess? Austin as Andrew Whitchurch, professional labourer, if you can dig that. He can. JJ as Marcus Cole, archaeologist with a passion for music. Stephen as Professor James T. Samson, a learned man, well-versed in all manner of Ancient History. Will M as Aubrey Fortescue, who knows a bunch about folklore. Theme Music is The Descent by Kevin MacLeod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1200094)

At last! At long last, we come to the end of our journey in this, the final episode of Mansion of Madness, and the closing of the current cycle of the WADS Detective Saga. With our investigators buried deep into the mystery of Ezekiel Crater's coastal mansion, and their brave officers lost, what shall become of them? And perhaps more importantly, what shall become of the dark stone? As our fearless heroes tread further into the dark night, stuff gets pretty gross this episode, I am not gonna lie. Like, this episode has some pretty grim stuff in it. So, fair warning! Nevertheless, we hope you enjoy. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as Deputy Eli Jackson, hard-working family man who keeps things simple. Stephen as Joseph Channel, war-weary handyman and all-around rough diamond. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Our rugged adventurers deal with the fall-out of recent events at the prison, and after tense negotiations, head off in search of mob boss Crater, delving deep into the lion's den of Boston. With the town in chaos, will our heroes be able to restore order? Then, also, some Matrix goofs. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as Deputy Eli Jackson, hard-working family man who keeps things simple, and as as Officer Mark "Butterfly Mark" Mackenzie. Stephen as Joseph Channel, war-weary handyman and all-around rough diamond, and as Detective Moustache "Elliot Ness" Thomas. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Well hello again, dear listeners! Yes, we have returned once more from the void to grant you an audience with your eternal band of heroes, this time their spirits darkened by terrible loss. In this time of displaced hearts and new environs, what make of ally shall our so-called protagonists find in these times of hardship? Their desperation forces them to forge bold new relationships with enterprising members of society, but for good or ill? And whatever happened to the cops last session? Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as Deputy Eli Jackson, hard-working family man who keeps things simple. Stephen as Joseph Channel, war-weary handyman and all-around rough diamond. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Hark! For the cries of destiny are upon you! Once more, the depths of time have been plunged sharply into by the wilful hands of your masterful players, and a tale of dark wretched horror has been birthed unto the night of this new age. Yes, another episode of Cthulhu on Parade's ongoing WADS Detective Saga has come to pass! And yours is the lot of the listener, to traverse these gloomy depths once more as a searcher for truth in the mists. As our heroes explore Pennsylvania, what strange misdeeds shall they uncover? Or, alternatively, what strange misdeeds shall they perpetrate? The stage is set, the senses are heightened, the doors are creaked open, and also at some point fault is found with your benevolent host's past as a player, for which I can only apologize. There's also a brief bit of singing at various points and rap songs are confused for other rap songs. We're human beings. Hope you enjoy, and sorry for the lateness! Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Joseph Channel, war-weary handyman and all-around rough diamond. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Fear not, dear listeners! All your favourite digressions are left intact in this very special episode of Cthulhu on Parade! We come to terms over the recent events and establish that Things Are Weird for the WADS Detective Agency. Resources are gathered and stones are unturned. Meetings are held! Breakfast is eaten! Supernatural times! Plus, witness an electrician's powerful struggle to finish the job he was hired to do! Stay tuned after the episode for a little more on how the sausage gets made. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Roger Cross, publicly addicted private dick, and Joseph Channel, war-weary handyman and all-around rough diamond. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

In this episode of Cthulhu on Parade, our desperate trio forges boldly onwards towards an encounter with the mythical ganglord, Zeke Crater! Will he be willing to divulge his terrible secrets? Or... Not? Time will tell! Your humble host apologizes for the delay in this episode's release. So let's roll onwards and make this thing happen. Also, after the game, a little discussion on some other stuff we've done in other episodes. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

When young Andrew Keetling disappears into the Boston landscape, who will step up to the plate and stick out their neck for the little man? Or just kinda go after him in the hopes that he'll be able to point them in the direction of a rock so they can get a wizard off their back? Well, the WADS Detective Agency are such a group! Witness their daring and decisive actions as they traipse across a world gone mad, finding friend and foe in their further investigations. When danger calls, they answer! Also I left a lot of stuff in this episode so hopefully it's not too distracting. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

In this episode, trouble comes to town... In the form of our plucky investigators! Driven by a sense of true honour and duty, the team widens their search to Boston in pursuit of the mysterious stone and the missing Andrew Keetling, who may have information on its whereabouts. Meanwhile, the eternal vigour of an old warhorse strikes its rusted heart upon the group in the form of yet another blast from the past! But will their combined efforts be enough to make any real sense of what's going on, or really do much of anything beyond just ambling around a lot bumping into clues? Recurring special guest constant low-level beeping joins us this episode (this issue gets fixed real soon, honest) and slightly less recurring but perhaps EVEN MORE special guest Jon Kelly (Twitter: @zer0jon) returns from the pits of the abyss to make things entertaining with his presence! The scenario begun in this episode is Mansion of Madness, from the scenario book "Mansions of Madness", published by Chaosium. The WADS Detective Agency Shall Return! Also, stay tuned after the session finishes for some bonus goofs. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Jon as Solomon Hargrave, a man of iron will with a dark grudge. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed(?) small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Greetings, listeners! This episode wraps up our heroes' grand adventures in the Dark Dreams of Innsmouth, and provides a link to a new nightmare... What does their mysterious benefactor have in store for them? Find out! (This episode is mostly improvised though provides some links to the scenario Mansion of Madness, found in the scenario book Mansions of Madness). Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

In this episode, our glorious heroes talk a lot about lighthouses before striking a deal with the possible devil. The so-inclined have never been stronger. Will they overcome adversity and find respite from their dark dreams, pertaining to that certain city? Or shall they mess the whole thing up and all die? Or, alternatively, will they all get arrested for their various crimes? Can an island be a peninsula instead? How long even is that zipline? And will we get off on a million tangents? Only by listening (and ignoring the constant quiet beeping due to me messing up the recording) can you find out! Also, at the time of this recording, a Twin Peaks reference goes completely over my head. A simpler time! And on the subject of references, a brief burn is made towards a series of books that I vaguely regret. You might know it when you hear it! Also, this was recorded around Hallowe'en of last year! I'm really behind on these updates, you guys. The scenario, Dark Dreams Of Innsmouth, is from the Unbound Book issue #2, available for free at http://www.yog-sothoth.com Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Ho ho ho, what's this? What's this coming down the road? Sure looks like a new episode of Cthulhu on Parade! to me! And you're telling me that it's a Fiasco actual play of the playset Clock Blockers by Rob Wieland, available here? http://mazecontroller.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/fiasco-clock-blockers.html And you're telling me that it's two hours of hilarious goofs and gags built on a foundation of ripping off pop culture and your old pal Richard Jokes? Well, why don't we all take a listen together? Perhaps it's time you dust off your old ears and grab a hold of that chair you're always sitting on, and settle in for a good time at the metaphorical movies. Featuring: Stephen, Will B & Will M as various characters. I forget who exactly. Theme Music is Porch Blues by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100108)

The WADS Detective Agency falls deeper into slumber as the mystery surrounding the crown continues to unfold, but will morning shine new light, or simply move them further into their waking nightmare? Only time, and listening to this episode, will tell. And also there's more elaboration on stuff from the last episode that I guess we forgot about. The scenario, Dark Dreams Of Innsmouth, is from the Unbound Book issue #2, available for free at http://www.yog-sothoth.com Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D’agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

In order to escape their fate, an unlikely pair forges a bond in times of strife and heads out to America, meeting up with new friends and settling into something of a paranormal detective agency, when part-time business associate professor Swanson Ames goes off the radar. Re-appearing later in a mental asylum, rambling about reefs and sunken cities, the remaining members are left with only a golden crown and a few oddities surrounding Ames' rescue from the ocean to uncover the truth, before anything else weird happens. In this new world, where opportunity waits around any corner for those brave or desperate enough to find it, what dreams may come? Will WAD Detective agency grasp the hand of destiny firmly and shake out some choice clues? Find out today! This scenario is being played as -kind of- a sequel to Head Over Heels, but is written as standalone and can probably mostly be enjoyed as such, though it does contain references to and spoilers for that episode. The scenario, Dark Dreams Of Innsmouth, is from the Unbound Book issue #2, available for free at http://www.yog-sothoth.com Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore Adam as A(a)ron Abra(ha)ms, old-fashioned detective with a nose for clues. Stephen as Noah Worth, reformed small-time crook and general miscreant. Will M as Martin D'Agnieu, paranormal specialist and wounded war-veteran. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Welcome once more to the deep, dark reaches of the Cthulhu on Parade! podcast's vast collection of (mostly unreleased) audio episodes! This time, we played the scenario Head over Heels from Cubicle7's excellent book "Cthulhu Britannica: Folklore". Joining us was a new player from the dark past, as such this is kind of an introductory type deal. Oh wait, the episode description hasn't started yet! Okay, so imagine you're way back in London, England, in the early 1920s. You love skulls, right? And you hate thieves! So as you can imagine the theft of your privately owned skull would be a pretty big deal and you would want some manner of recompense. This scenario puts forth the idea: what if that glorious justice was doled out by four roguish strangers under hire by a couple of rich jerks? With powerful forces rising, not everything is quite as it first appears (and also Adam is like, super-sick you guys, during the recording of this? So there's a few appearances of his mysterious illness which has since claimed his life/been healed by time (delete as appropriate)). Hope you enjoy! We had a pretty good time recording this one. Featuring: Will B as Keeper of Arcane Lore Adam as Aron Abrahams, detective with a mild drinking problem. Jon as Solomon Hargrave, extrovert socialite with a steady heart. Martin as Harry Diamond, beneath his smooth exterior lurks a terrible rage. Stephen as Noah Worth, small-time crook and general miscreant. Theme Music is Awkward Meeting by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100574)

Lock your doors! Fortify your ice cream shops! Cthulhu on Parade is back with an all new exciting one-shot adventure, this time it's an all-star extravaganza! (again? did I use that last time?) Anyway we ran the Crack'd and Crook'd Manse from the scenario book "Mansions of Madness". When brilliant millionaire recluse Arthur Cornthwaite goes missing, a quartet of brave heroes is called to arms. Burning into the midnight air, their fiery resolve knows no bounds! Together, they must discover the truth behind the disappearance of Arthur and learn the terrifying secrets of... The Crack'd and Crook'd Manse! Also, there's a few in-jokes that you'll understand better if you check out Episode #136 of Mars Needs Podcasts, "A Bit Of Dem Diamonds" - they played Call of Cthulhu! Most of the same players, just, none of us. (http://www.thewebsiteofdoom.com/podcasts/mars-needs-podcasts-136-a-bit-of-dem-diamonds/) PS, check the blog to follow along with the map! -- http://cthulhuparade.wordpress.com Featuring: Will B (That's me!) as Keeper of Arcane Lore. JJ Hawkins (Of Mars Needs Podcasts!) as Harmon Angell, the courageous head (and heart) of a detective agency. Jon Kelly (Of Zer0cast!) as Thurston Dexter, bookish, meddling part-time professor and a childhood friend of the missing Arthur. Scott White (Of the Instant Leftovers Podcast!) as Eric Graves, recently married detective co-worker and friend of Harmon. Sharp, and good at reading people. Will M (Of this podcast!) as Martin Ward, missing persons specialist hired externally by the client. A bit tense. Theme music is Rising Game by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100593)

Our heroes dive further into the darkness, with deadly and maddening results. Topically, something is not quite right with this beef. Will M as Keeper of Arcane Lore Stephen as Barry Zbigniew, police officer with a strong interest in self-preservation. Will B as Agent Harper Winslow, dedicated to following leads and solving crimes. The Red Tower continues to be free and continues to be available here: http://hebanongames.com/no-security-the-red-tower/

When they pull a knife, you just pull out your iPod and tell 'em to listen to this.* Cthulhu on Parade! is back with two whole new episodes! This time, we're playing Hebanon Games' The Red Tower scenario, and although the first session is tragically lost to time, the collected sequels (thus far) are presented here in their entirety (except where edited by guest editor Goggleman64 aka "Will M") and filmed in glorious technicolor. It's 1930s Chicago, shortly after the fall of Al Capone. Plucky FBI investigator Harper Winslow has gallantly stumbled into a nightmare world of power struggles and rampant mob activity, aided in his quest for justice by hardboiled local law enforcer Barry Zbigniew, a man wholly dedicated to his particular brand of peacekeeping who plays by the rules and gets results. With this (wise)crack(ing) team assembled, the investigation proceeds... Also Agent Winslow is in contact with a newspaper that has a missing star reporter (Will told me to write that because he missed it when he recorded the introduction) Will M as Keeper of Arcane Lore Stephen as Barry Zbigniew, police officer with a strong interest in self-preservation. Will B as Agent Harper Winslow, dedicated to following leads and solving crimes. *Never do this. The Red Tower PDF is free and available here: http://hebanongames.com/no-security-the-red-tower/

What madness hath man wrought? We wrought a zoo. Brookmarket Zoo has been dealing with some financial troubles lately, and our intrepid heroes have a few plans to save it! Or destroy it. At least there shall be change. The definition of marriage is challenged, an R. Kelly track is first correctly, then incorrectly identified, and a Comedy Bang Bang bit is ripped off wholesale yet again by master joke-thief Will B. But will any of this help the zoo? About an hour goes by with GUEST STAR JON KELLY (of the fantastic Zer0cast podcast) not being able to get much of a word in edgewise or participate much in the scenes, then Adam has to do some housecleaning. It's three hours long! We all get very tired. Buckle up, kids. It's FIASCO time again. Featuring: Will M - Thomas, a man spurned by the International Zoological Society... Spurned into mad science! Will B - Chad, co-engineer of a master scheme to breed a new type of animal and wolf exhibit guy. Adam - Eddie, involved with the wolf exhibit in some way, and also has some shady connections? Jon - Isaac, who I guess has some kind of semi-managerial role in one of the zoo's exhibits whose only crime was loving the zoo too much. Stephen - Frank, a desperate man who may or may not be a gorilla/human hybrid, and may or may not know sign language. Go ahead, try learning all their last names from this recording. It can't be done. Spoiler-alert for the movie Vacancy! Theme music is Tikopia by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/m/c/royalty-free/index.html?keywords=tikopia)

The thrilling conclusion! A bleak frost creeps into the hearts of our heroes, compelling them to perform strange deeds, such as letting new character Ichabod into the party and then putting up with his dumb quotations and singing forever plus at one point forgetting his name. The Snowsford brothers find themselves wrenched into the dominant mindset of another once more, questioning their abilities and unable to recall their past, and Mary is just so incredibly tired, you guys. Maybe not at first but she is just falling asleep. Will the secret identity of the so-called "possessed" be revealed? What foul spirits have caused such calamity, chaos, and cold, here in Cray Canyon? Will Ichabod settle down on an accent that isn't kinda racist? How far can ten minutes be stretched before the very limits of TIME ITSELF are breached? How much backseat Keeping can Will B do? (spoiler: it's a lot) Find out the answer to all these burning questions, plus also there's some burning, in: EPISODE 3. Featuring: Will M as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Sam as Mary Henderson, a woman with a heart of stone, but a will of steel. Adam on double duty as Bill Snowsford, a man with an eye for trouble and two guns for shootin’ and brother of Winston, and selfsame Winston Snowsford, dangerous sharp-shooter. Will B as Ephraim Van Borden, lecherous profiteer with a dark past, and Ichabod Crow, gunslinger of indeterminate origin.

Since the dawn of time, mankind has sought to answer one single question, in many forms: How do I stop the cold? Like moths, we have long been drawn to the flame as a solution. But when those last burning embers die in the eternal march of time, and entropy suggests that they will, what dark forces shall mankind turn to for sustenance? Milkshakes, I guess, because that is pretty much all of everyone's motivation for this episode. Oh, and there's a missing kid, too, and some freaky stuff going on with the passengers. Could be vampires. Could be somethin' else. Whatever it is, it's got our heroes spooked enough that they're willing to take on a new ally in the darkness. In 3D. Featuring: Will M as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Sam as Mary Henderson, a woman with a heart of stone, but a will of steel. Stephen on double duty as Winston Snowsford, dangerous sharp-shooter and brother of Bill, and selfsame Bill Snowsford, a man with an eye for trouble and two guns for shootin’. Will B as Ephraim Van Borden, lecherous profiteer with a dark past.

In the Wild West, one law prevails above all others: Survival. Meet our band of brothers, boarding a train to who-knows-where one crisp, cold night on the plains. See their struggle, as passengers in peril get picked off by unknown parties. Fight their fight alongside them, taking the battle to the roof... And beyond. One man will not be swayed, and shall instead spend most of the trip trying to have sex with various men and women, alternately, and being pretty ineffective all around and wind up half-dead by the end of the episode. But who? Find out, by listening to the exciting tale of... The Cray Canyon Cold Snap! PS: Rate and subscribe to both our podcast and Mars Needs Podcasts, you chumps. You chumps! Or I shall destroy you! You are on thin ice! Featuring: Will M as Keeper of Arcane Lore. Adam as "Wild" Bill Snowsford, a man with an eye for trouble and two guns for shootin'. Stephen as Winston Snowsford, dangerous sharp-shooter and brother of Bill. Will B as Ephraim Van Borden, lecherous profiteer with a dark past. Theme song performed by William Binns, an entirely original composition from which no law suits can be made.

It's Christmas! And we're a podcast. So, it seems only fitting that we put up a little audio treat on the feed for the festive season. This song, to the tune of Up On The Housetop, was written by Sam, and vocals were performed by Amy, Will M, Will B (that's me) and Sam. Music performed by Sam (oboe) and Will B (everything else). Edited and produced by Will B. This track is part of a larger Charity album, Cast Aid (in aid of The Hunger Project), and is available for free or donation here: http://casttheworld.wordpress.com/ DONATE. DONATE NOW.

Spooky goings-on aboard a submarine many leagues below the sea! Could the cause be... Supernatural? Who cares! We've got to flood the ship and make endless Solid Snake impersonations! Your only chance for survival is to take a listen AS SOON AS POSSIBLE (NOW). This one's a real beauty of an episode as we branch out and play the Objective Zebra scenario for the Fiasco RPG, available here: http://www.bullypulpitgames.com/games/fiasco/. Melt down your metal Pope, it's time for Episode 09: Objective Zebra! Featuring: Will B as Richard Striker, veteran of the Great War. Sam as Stone, psychically gifted veteran of the Great War. Will M as Finn Constantine, psychically gifted Navy handler and special agent. Adam as Doctor Jake, demonically possessed mad doctor. Theme music is Backed Vibes by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/m/c/royalty-free/index.html?keywords=backed+vibes&Search=Search)

Assorted "Best Bits" from episodes that shall never be uploaded in their entirety. Unless YOU, the listener, DEMAND IT?! Or unless I know you personally and then I can just slide you the original file under the table. There's no need to make this a big thing, guys. Theme music is Backed Vibes by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/m/c/royalty-free/index.html?keywords=backed+vibes&Search=Search)

So we're late. Terribly, terribly late. But we make up for it with one of the most spellbinding two hours of audio gaming ever recorded in the history of mankind! Fears are faced, judgment is made, pudding is a major plot point, and Will M pretty much makes everything up as he goes. Join us for Episode 08, as we discover... The Curse of Cultist Church! Oh yes, and did I mention that we're all cultists in this episode? Terrible, terrible cultists? Yeah, you're going to need to listen to this one. WITH SPECIAL GUEST: SCOTT WHITE (@Scott_WhiteAhh) FROM THE INSTANT LEFTOVERS PODCAST (SEARCH YOUR ITUNES FOR IT, IT'S GOOD, AND WHILE YOU'RE THERE CHECK OUT THE MARS NEEDS PODCASTS CTHULHU GAME TOO) Featuring: Will M as Jacques/Cobweb/Keeper (and cultist). Adam as Jacob "Jake" Taylor, war veteran (and cultist). Scott W as Jeff Rogers, international man of mystery (and cultist). Will B as Jack Lake, intrepid reporter (and cultist). Theme music is Backed Vibes by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/m/c/royalty-free/index.html?keywords=backed+vibes&Search=Search)

Cthulhu Parades No More! For a while. We couldn't get everybody together to finish a scenario, so for a while we did some bonus episodes, which I'll be uploading until we get the next episode of Cthulhu on Parade! finished. This one's an improvised game of Call of Cthulhu based around the short story "The Monkey's Paw", but... Well, you'll see how faithful we were to the original. Hope you enjoy it! Oh, and there's also a trailer for fantastic internet radio play series "Simon Colt" by the KWUR Theater of the Air, available here: http://kwurradiotheater.wordpress.com Tune in next week for more! Featuring: Adam as Jacob Taylor Sam as Foster Taylor/Keeper Will B as Philip Taylor/Keeper Will M as Colonel Taylor/Keeper Theme music is Backed Vibes by Kevin Macleod (http://incompetech.com/m/c/royalty-free/index.html?keywords=backed+vibes&Search=Search)