In All Honesty

Do you feel disappointed when someone does react the way you want?Do you find yourself getting annoyed at people for things you used to love in them?Do you assume people don't care about you?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how your reactions aren't always a good indicator of what you are feeling inside. She discusses the differences in how people express themselves and why it's important to understand this difference to not take it personally. She talks through personal experiences and why intense reactions will be intense in both a positive and negative way.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok or Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you still worry about letitng down your parents?Do you find it hard to make decisions without other people's inputDo you struggle to see your own opinion as important?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about waiting for your parents' approval will limit you and how it can impact your life if you aren't conscious of the fact that you are still searching for it. She discusses the importance of trying to not change people and gives tips on how to place your own opinion of higher importance than anyone else. She also gives you direct examples on how to boundary unwanted opinions.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Are you a perfectionist?Do you worry about looking silly?Do you feel guilty if you aren't being productiveThen this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle makes a case for why you need a hobby you are bad at and why it changed her life in so many ways. She talks about the different hobbies she has found and why being intentional about not improving your skill or trying to progress in any way is the key to it. She discusses how it changes your mentality around productivity and fun and shares how it has impacted her life more broadly to make it one of the best pieces of advice she gives out.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you wish you were more fearless?Do you find yourself declining opportunities because you are scared?Would you like to know the secret to managing fear?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how there is a myth around fearlessness that doesn't serve us and creates an unrealistic goal. She talks about how she overcomes fear herself and the tools and mentalities she used in order to do scary things like her TedX talk. She discusses how she has natvigated fear in her own career and why she doesn't let those feelings make the decisions or decide how the situation is going to go. She talks about how to gain control of your thoughts and why you might be making the fear worse than it needs to be. She also provides a book recommendation and a music playlist to help you in those scary moments.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you have days where you struggle to get out of bed?Does your self-care go out the window when you have bad mental health?Do you need a way to simplify looking after your basic needs?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how Honey Ross introduced to a really basic way to look after your self-care when life gets hard and how taking a tip from The Sims helped her cope in the pandemic. She talks about how Sims in the perfect example of taking care of each need and the importance of seeing fun needs as important as the bare essentials like hunger and sleep. She discusses how society places a hierachy of needs and why that doesn't work and why we should all live more like Sims.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you think you are a bad writer?Would you like to be an author someday?Are you curious about how you get a book deal?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how she got book deals for Am I Ugly? and The Joy of Being Selfish and how the writing process differs when you submit a book on proposal vs. a full manuscript. She talks about what she does when she feels she is creatively stuck and how she prevents writer's block and how wanting to delete your whole book is part of the process. She gives you quick tips to get started and demonstrates how writing a book is repeated commitment to sitting down and continue writing no matter what.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you want an alternative to New Years resolutions?Do you dread staying up for NYE?Do you want to know how to make the most of 2022Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about what she does at the end of every year to take all the lessons and learning from this year into the next. She shares why yearly reviews have become a lovely ritual for her and why she places less importance on being awake at midnight and that the mentality that how you spend your NYE determines the rest of your year is rubbish.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you believe there are good or bad people?Do you think you aren't judgemental?Have you been saying this is a bad year?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how the labels 'good' and 'bad' could be negatively impacting your perceptions. She discusses how these are judgements and why we have a system in our brain that will prevent us from seeing the whole picture. She gives you a quick exercise to broaden your awareness and shows how these snap decisions start in childhood.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you dread Christmas?Do you compare your family to others?Does your Christmas meal always end in a fight?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle reassures you that you aren't alone if Christmas isn't your thing and the holiday period is tough for you to get through. She talks about how you can make this weekend a more peaceful time of the year and shows you ways to redefine this time of year to make it work for you.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Are you currently going through a rough time?Have you ever wondered if you will ever stop crying?Are you finding it really hard to keep the faith that life will get better?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle shares the beliefs and mindsets she uses in her own life when life is throwing you hurdles one after another and you don't know how you are going to survive it. She talks about how these mentalities are things she accumulated over years in life coaching herself and how she used them in lockdown when her mental health wobbled. She also discusses the fact that these beliefs aren't necessarily accurate but convenient when it's hard to imagine life getting any easier. For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you want to exercise without hating your body?Is it hard to understand how someone can actually love exercise?Can body positivity and fitness co-exist?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how she went from hating movement to loving exercise. She gives you practical tips to change your relationship with exercise from one of punishment, compensating calories and self-hatred to moving from a place of fun and genuine enjoyment. She talks about her pivotal mindset shift as well as the things she had to unlearn in order to give herself permission to enjoy exercise. She discusses the impact diet culture has on your view of exercise and how you can eradicate that so movement can return to something that you can enjoy.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you struggle to build intimacy?Is it hard for you to show appreciation?Have you found that you feel less connected to the people in your life?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle shares the three things that she is unlearning in her own life that leads to intimacy and connection being broken in all relationship. She discusses how people in your life can either be positive motivation to repeat similar behaviours or negative motivation to choose something different and shares three specific ways you can choose to be different if you lacked intimacy and connection in your childhoodFor more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you wish you were body confidence?Do you think body positivity means being positive about your body?Do you think body neutrality is a more realistic goal?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about the difference between body confidence and body positivity and why labels can often confuse your own body image. She discusses how she is often held up as the 'end result' of body positivity and why this is flawed in so many ways. She talks about what the goal of body confidence practically looks like in day-to-day life and how you can make changes to your own life and how she went through the process herselfFor more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Is telling people how you feel about them a scary prospect?Do you struggle to know how to compliment people?Would you like the people in your life to feel more appreciated?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about how a funeral made her evaluate whether she'd told the people she cares that she loves them. She talks about how to give a compliment and why specific compliments have a different impact. She shares her two ethos in life around telling people about the parts of themselves they don't notice and gives you texts that you should send yourself.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Did you hear the phrase 'I'm only telling you for your own good' as a child?Were you told 'if I can't tell you, who will'?Do you find it hard to make mistakes without shaming yourself?Then this episode is for you.In this episode, Michelle talks about criticism and how it affects your self-esteem. She talks about why when a parent specifically criticises us, we are unable to separate it from our behaviour and see it as our behaviour. Michelle also talks about how being constantly criticised will affect how you relate to people and your future friendships and romantic relationships with others. She discusses how to do the inner work to heal it and why your inner critic is not yours.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Are you a big procrastinator?Do you just believe you are lazy?Were you taught that never quitting was the key to success?Then this episode is for you. In this episode, Michelle explains why the podcast is undergoing a little bit of a change and adapting to a more casual approach. She talks about how procrastination is a word often used to distract from the real problem and the four actual reasons someone might procrastinate. She talks about how to get out of creative slump and why quitting is an essential life skill that is integral to success.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Why do I not believe people when they apologize?How do I forgive myself and know I won't do it again?Should I continue to persist when someone doesn't accept your apology?How do I ask for an apology for something that happened ages ago?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on apologies and explains what a good apology involves. She discusses apology languages and why she doesn't completely agree with this model but how it is helpful to construct your own apologies. She talks about the phrase "if they were really sorry, they wouldn't have done it in the first place" and how some people need time to realise when they've done something wrong and some people realise instantly. She discusses the difference between real apologies and when apologies are just words. She also gives tips for people who hate apologising and how to move your ego out of the way. She also discusses a scene in Ginny and Georgia about how jealousy between parents and children can arise and how to process that jealousy.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Is it a red flag if they never ask about me?What are the warning signs for emotional unavailability?Are there any clues that someone is going to ghost?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on red flags and defines what a red flag is. She explains the actual meaning of red flags and why this word should not be used to describe everything. She discusses how the idea of foreseeing every red flag is flawed and why we need to have a balance of being aware of red flags and not being too overanalytical. She explores the concept of conscious dating and why this is the key to a healthy balance. Within this episode, she also gives you tips on how to be conscious enough to spot red flags. She also discusses a scene in Real Housewives of New York and how our fantasies create contradictions in the words we say when we aren't being honest with ourselves.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Can you still stay friends if one person likes the other and it's not reciprocated?Should you end it if they don't want kids and you do?How do you know your breakup was the right decision?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on breakups and discusses the importance of making sure breakups are clean breaks. She talks about whether you actually should stay friends after a break-up and why it really doesn't matter who breaks up with who. She discusses why breakups should be a discussion and not a finite conversation and whether you are too young to make a decision about kids. Within the episode, she also gives tips on how to heal from a breakup and why you need to take time to grieve the future you once had. She also discusses an episode of Ugly Betty and why boundaries are so necessary for breakups and why it is unfair to force a friendship when both people are not invested.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

If I cut family out, will I regret it when they die?What can you do when family treat me like I'm stupid?Is it OK to set boundaries over emails and text?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on family relationships and discusses how we should hold the same standards of treatment in our familal relationships than any other relationship in our life. She talks about how the media has perpetuated this idea of "perfect families" and how Christmas enhances this idea. She shows how to set boundaries within family relationship and talks about how we learn boundaries most from our parents. She unpicks whether you can be good at setting boundaries if you are not good at receiving it and also questions how the idealised view of parents means we tend to romanticise our childhoods.Within the episode, she also gives tips on how to improve communication within your family and why you shouldnt' accept 'how things have always been' for future communication. She also discusses an episode of Station 19 that highlights how we can talk about the intersections of race and the racism that the Asian community are facing due to Corona Virus.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

How do you have a consent conversation without turning them off?What do you do when penetration just doesn't work?Can you have a casual relationship without moving too quickly?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on sex and discusses how we focus too much on the penis and penetration in sex. She talks about how we need to prioritise female pleasure more and why the consent conversation is simply boundary setting. She talks about why so many women find penetration uncomfortable and why the normalisation of sex hurting for women stems from the idea that a woman's first time is going to hurt. She gives you tips on how to be more in your body during sex and why it's important to stay out of your head. Within the episode, she also shares how to get into a casual relationship and why unsolicited dick pics don't ever need to be tolerated. She also discusses a scene in One Tree Hill that highlights the problem with rushing into marriage to heal a childhood wound and gives a key warning sign of moving too quickly.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

When you change a lot, is it normal to want to change your friends?How do you stop worrying about future responsibility coming into your life?And what do you do when you aren't sure who you are anymore?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on life changes and asks that we notice the distinction between the adjustment process vs a settled change. She talks about how changes in your life may result in unexpected changes in the relationships and dynamics with the people in your life. She talks about the changes we have all faced in the pandemic and gives tips on how to manage change and create certainty if you feel unsafe. She gives you tips on how to stay in the moment, not needing to define every stage in your life and having more flexibility in life. She also discusses a scene in Scandal that highlights why it is important to have standards and know how you deserve to be treated. We also get into a conversation about chakras and how that can affect your energy.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

How do you trust a new partner when the last one cheated on you?Is it true that "once a cheater, always a cheater"?And how do you end it with someone if the trust is broken for good.In this episode, Michelle answers questions on infidelity and talks about why what constitutes as cheating will change for every person. She talks about how cheating and infidelity relates to boundaries and whether people really can change. She talks about the lasting impact cheating can have on a relationship and why staying in a relationship isn't always a bad thing. She gives you tips on how to heal if you were cheated on and also why it might have a lasting impact on your trust in other relationships in your life. She gives you practical tips on what to do if you decide to stay in the relationship and how you can know if they are truly invested in changing or it is just words. She also discusses a scene in Desperate Housewives that brings up the idea of comparison and why when we compare ourselves to others, we lose all context.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

What do you do when you feel like you can never do enough personal development?How do you stop self-sabotaging your own success?And what do you do if you feel like an imposter when you are confident?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on self worth, what it is and how to build your own. She talks about how a lot of the self worth conversation is very lofty and why people need practical advice in order to actually create the changes in their life. She talks about imposter syndrome is an illusion and why it's important to let personal development work resonate emotionally and not just intellectually. She gives you tips, exercises and tools you need in order to grow your self worth each day and shares with you a new exercise she is using herself to heal inner wounds from childhood. She also discusses a scene in The Bold Type and talks about why we need to be having race conversations, even if they aren't perfectly eloquent and articulate.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do if you feel like your friends expect you to be perfect, how do you handle someone else's perfectionism affecting you in group projects and how to heal how fear of failure so it doesn't affect your life anymore. She talks about how she believes perfectionism is used as a protection from the ego and how the term 'perfectionist' is used to push others down and feel better about yourself. She discusses how a number of things are hiding behind the term 'perfectionism' and gives you her evidence and proof as to why you should remove this word from your vocabulary altogether. She gives you tips on how to squash perfectionism immediately and gives you practical exercises to get started. She also discusses a scene in New Amsterdam which demonstrates how a boundary can be used as a wall when you are too scared to be intimate.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to handle jealousy at other people happy in love, whether people actually do change their mind about wanting a marriage and kids and when being single is just a disguise for not wanting to make yourself vulnerable to date. She talks about why she had a period of being consciously single and how that benefitted her life and why if you wouldn't date yourself, you still have things to work on before you are ready for a relationship. She gives you tips on how to be happy single and talks about what the difference is between walls and boundaries. She also discusses a scene in The Hills which brings up the dilemma of what do you do if your partner is refusing to change.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to cope in a pandemic when we have so much time on our hands, what to do if you find yourself stressing about using your free time productively and how to stop feeling the constant need to be busy. She talks about how we as a society have glorified being busy for so long and why that has resulted in the pandemic being such a shock to so many people. She gives you tips on how to learn to rest without guilt and talks about how an absence of rest often means an avoidance of your emails. She also discusses a scene in Firefly Lane and how codependent friendships can never be healthy.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to love your body when it is in so much pain, how do you adjust when your body is stopping you from living your dream life and whether it is worth it to lose weight for insurance to cover your surgery. She goes into the difference between body positivity and body confidence and discusses how to love your body through chronic illness. She gives you tips on how to be more vocal within the body positive movement and why it's important to make your version of body positivity intersectional. She also discusses a scene in Gilmore Girls which brings up the classic scenario of how to handle it when you say 'I love you' and they don't say it back.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to cut someone out, what to do if this person treats you differently to your other friend and whether you are allowed to cut someone out for giving you the silent treatment. She goes into how to handle it when people don't believe you and where to draw the line if someone is making up lies about you. She gives you tips on how to have that final conversation and what happens when there are mutual relationships and how when they get involved it results in triangulation. She also discusses a scene in The Crown which brings up the conversation whether a parent is allowed to have a favourite child and what impact that has on the family dynamic.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how you grieve someone who is still alive, whether feelings of grief for an old therapist confuses feelings for a new therapist and what do you do if you wish you had spent more time together. She gives you tips on how to process grief and whether it's possible to move on from grief or whether moving on "with" grief is healthier and explains that grief is an emotion that can arise around any loss and not just bereavement. She also discusses a scene in Breaking Bad in processing feelings around anticipatory grief and how to separate your feelings about someone else's situation.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this special bonus episode, Michelle discusses how she found out about pick-up artists, why that relates to her training as a life coach and how neuro-linguistic programming are related to both. She goes back through her life and recalls moments that she now recognises as pick-up artist techniques and how the book "Men Who Hate Women" has opened up an important conversation that needs to be had. The increased awareness around this secret community is essential for changes to take place and be able to recognise when it is happening in your own life so she shares a few techniques she has witnessed herself.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do if you want kids but your partner gets angry everytime you bring the conversation up, whether it's acceptable to be jealous of your partner's friend and if money is a legitimate reason to end a relationship. She gives you tips on how to have productive arguments within a relationship and talks about how romantic relationships often brings up our shadow self and uses an example from her own life to demonstrate how we can use it as an opportunity to heal and grow. She also discusses a scene in Normal People when the main character finds herself at dinner with her boyfriend and her ex-boyfriend and it all goes horribly wrong.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to manage the fear of making new friends, what to do if your partner feels lonely every time you leave and what to do if you already feel lonely and your friends keep cancelling. She gives you tips on how to process loneliness and heal from it as a childhood wound and explains the difference between alone and lonely. She also discusses a scene in Dawson's Creek and how to honour someone's vulnerability when they reveal something they are embarrassed about.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do when a friend ghosts you, how you stop ghosting from affecting your self esteem and what to do when ghosting makes you doubt that the relationship even happened. She gives you tips on how to heal from the rejection and hurt that ghosting can cause and talks about how we need to take control of the parts we can control and why ghosting is the biggest turn off. She also discusses a scene in Emily In Paris when she tells her boyfriend she is moving to Paris and how that conversation could have gone!For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to find your first job after graduation, what to do if your health affects your ability to work your dream job and how do you set boundaries with a boss who doesn't understand you are off the clock when you leave the office. She gives you tips on how to write a CV with a difference and talks about how the pressure for your first job to be the right job is too high and how to change your mentality around starting from the bottom in middle-age.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do if you can't feel your emotions, how do your resolve childhood memories if you can't remember what happened and how do you stop crying when everything is going wrong. She gives you tips on how to process emotions and she shares why the way society talks about emotions is wrong and why we need to change the stereotype that emotions mean weakness.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

We’re also lucky enough to have a superhero in our family.  She doesn’t wear a cape. She doesn’t have a fancy costume.  But she does have more strength than Superman.  Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here – http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES –  For pregnancy loss support call or visit  STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones.  SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au  Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby.  RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit  PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit  CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call  LIFELINE - 13 11 14  BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I can unequivocally say that Oliver is one of the most passionate, um, empathetic, brilliant human beings, uh I know.  Don’t get me wrong, he can be a, he can be a sixteen and a half year old uh, and  drive you crazy… But here, is his first letter.  “To Meg. I don’t really know how to start…” Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here – http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES –  For pregnancy loss support call or visit  STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones.  SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au  Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby.  RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit  PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit  CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call  LIFELINE - 13 11 14  BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do when your friend stops sharing information with you, whether men and women can be just friends and how to have a conversation with a friend about your relationship if they want space. She gives you tips on how to find new friends (even in the middle of a pandemic!) and she shares how as a society we should be talking about the significance of a friend breakup, as often as we talk about romantic relationships ending.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

“I didn’t think, for a moment, I didn’t think, he’d have the understanding of what that was, to want to know his little sister.  Um, his big sister I should say. His older sister, um.  And I, I guess again kids’ll surprise you, they don’t – they seem to understand the other side or whatever it is, whatever you wanna believe, better than us.”  Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here – http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES   For pregnancy loss support call or visit  STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones.  SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au  Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby.  RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via the website PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available on their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit  PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit  CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call  LIFELINE - 13 11 14  BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

“...it’s like someone’s got a foot on your heart and they’re just pressing this and you keep thinking surely that, that’s the last of it, surely that’s the last of that kind of pain. Surely that has to stop eventually…" Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here – http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES –  For pregnancy loss support call or visit  STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones.  SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au  Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby.  RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit  PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit  CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call  LIFELINE - 13 11 14  BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do when it feels like your whole life has stagnated, how do you feel more in control when everything in the world is uncertain and how can you help yourself if you feel uncertain because you are stuck with no options. She gives you tips on how to ride the wave of uncertainty and how to create certainty in uncertain moments. She also shares how her certainty in her writing career gave her the boldness to email Ariana Huffington herself!For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

There’s a balance to how it all works out. We’re not prepared for this shit ever… when it comes. I guess that’s what makes us human.   But I just remember… they say a piece of you goes when someone goes in your life that means a lot to you. Now, I never knew my daughter. I knew her for two days. And for those two days she was deceased. But… we formed a bond. Like, it was real and I know she’s looking after us. I know she is. And maybe that’s just what gets me by. Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here – http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All- Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES – For pregnancy loss support call or visit - STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones. - SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby. - RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website - PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit - PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit - CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ - PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call - LIFELINE - 13 11 14 - BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss - MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

And I remember just holding… this… tiny little girl in my hands. Her lips were fully, like, fully formed… they looked exactly like… Olly’s lips. And she had big feet, I remember she had - well y’know, big feet for her body - um… and I looked up and I… I was very emotional. I was… I was weeping - quite - profusely. And I lay with my daughter. And I… there was no way I was going home. There was no way I was leaving. Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The TwelveFor episode Transcripts click here – http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES – For pregnancy loss support call or visit - STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones. - SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby. - RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website - PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit - PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit - CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ - PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call - LIFELINE - 13 11 14 - BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss - MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, Michelle has a special announcement to help you navigate boundaries! She answers questions on how to manage guilt around setting boundaries, what to do when the person you are setting boundaries with has bad mental health and how to respect someone else's boundaries when your boundaries aren't being respected. She gives you tips on how to set boundaries and shares how to open the conversation of boundaries in a calm way and the language you can use to set your own boundaries.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do when you are losing hope in the dating game, how to stop relying on the external validation of men and whether it's a good idea to specify if you only want a guy who needs a car. She gives you tips on how to change your dating app profiles and shares the importance of putting full body pictures, and how it can go wrong if you aren't honest on your dating apps.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Every morning at 7.30am, Olly comes into his parents’ room. Like clockwork on the dot. He lifted up his mum’s shirt, gave her belly a kiss and said “bye bye baby… see you” A reminder that even in their darkest hour - “Olly needed us to be strong and keep going..for him.” Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant  Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here - http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html   SUPPORT NOTES   For pregnancy loss support call or visit  STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones.    SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby.    RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website   PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services.   For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit  PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression.   For additional support links visit  CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/   For mental health support and resources call  LIFELINE - 13 11 14  BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Almost fourteen years ago, Amanda and Bert had a little girl, named Meg. Meg was stillborn. Then, for almost fourteen years following - Every time Bert mowed the lawns, it rained soon after. Episode one of IN ALL HONESTY introduces us to a family, and how even the greatest heartbreak can lead to a little magic.   Words by Bert LaBonté and Original Music Composition by Gillian Cosgriff. Sound Design by Nat Grant  Produced by Tinderbox Productions for The Twelve For episode Transcripts click here - http://tinderboxproductions.com.au/In-All-Honesty.html SUPPORT NOTES  For pregnancy loss support call or visit  STILLBIRTH FOUNDATION AUSTRALIA https://stillbirthfoundation.org.au/ Stillbirth Foundation Australia provides resources for parents, but also for family friends and colleagues unsure how to support their loved ones.  SANDS on 1300 072 637 & www.sands.org.au  Sands is a volunteer-based organisation providing individualised care from one bereaved parent to another, giving them support and hope for the future, following the death of a baby.  RED NOSE Grief & Loss 1300 308 307 & https://rednosegriefandloss.org.au/ Provides 24-hour support for grieving parents and families who have experienced the death of a baby during pregnancy, birth, infancy or childhood, regardless of cause. Red Nose also has professional counselling, support groups and resources available via website PINK ELEPHANTS https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/ Provides information and support for women through miscarriage, pregnancy loss and beyond. The group supports women through their grief, nurtures them as they heal and empower them as they move into the future.  There are a number of resources available in their website including useful information about miscarriage stages and support services. For antenatal and postnatal support call or visit  PERINATAL ANXIETY & DEPRESSION Australia – 1300 726 306 & https://www.panda.org.au/ PANDA provides free telephone support counselling and information on antenatal and postnatal depression. For additional support links visit  CENTRE OF PERINATAL EXCELLENCE (COPE) - https://www.cope.org.au/getting-help/self-help/types-treatment/ PREGNANCY LOSS AUSTRALIA - https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/ For mental health support and resources call  LIFELINE - 13 11 14  BEYOND BLUE - 1300 22 4636 For men looking for assistance with relationship problems as a result of pregnancy loss MENSLINE AUSTRALIA 1300 78 99 78 Professional telephone and online support, information and referral service for men See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on why we are so focused on a baby's weight, how to educate others on fatphobia when they don't want to listen and how to change fatphobic language. She gives you tips on how to address your own internalised fatphobia, shares important statistics on fatphobia and recommends books to help you educate yourself.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on why anger is such a stigmatised emotion, how you can express anger without hurting others and why anger is the only negative emotion that creates energy. She gives you tips on how to processed unresolved anger, explains why negative emotions are not negative, and makes an important distinction between rage and anger, as well as anger and aggression.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Michelle answers questions on whether long distance relationships can work, can you start a new relationship with distance and is it a good idea to move across the country for a partner. She gives you tips on how to make distance work, how long distance is sometimes used as an excuse and talks about the practical issues that arise when you don't live in the same area as your partner.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter @MichelleLElman See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.