Almost Positive

This week the guys are joined by Almost Positive conspiracy expert Klaus Neuhaus, who tells them about the Joe Biden body double and the first CIVD vaccine test patient. They are also joined by Evey Winters a trans woman and connoisseur of kindness (and hot sauces) who educates the gentlemen on biological sex, gender, and peanut butter pickle sandwiches. Last but not least the guys are joined by Jairo aka Jamal aka Tyrone aka Our Friend David, aka Ury and now aka Mr. Never On Time, who was not prepared for a Destination Unknown segment, instead, joining the gang with topics like, the current state of memes, and finding new music as one gets older. The gang also discusses Matthew McConaughey, Joe Biden's big plans for the nation, No-Nerf-Gun-Santa, and Shia Labeouf's psycho non-sense. 

This week the guys have Luis aka Dishwata, Layne, and Etti. They discuss Christmas date-rape song "Baby it's cold outside", perverts in wrestling, straight edge lifestyles, and the power of stickers to inspire the human spirit. The gang also shares some sad stories before getting into some hot video game talk, where we learn that after 6 months, Dishwata has yet to finish The Last Of Us 2 like he promised he would last time he was on the show. He also gives the audience some advice on how to make the hard PS5 or Xbox Series X decision. The guys also take some time to get to unravel the mystery that is Etti. In the news, it's the floppy Kraken, defund the police, and, yay, more women in politics!

This week the guys talk turkeys and post mortem boners. Sir shares his recent experience in Mexico, as well as a fact about turkeys, then Van shares his new word of the week. They are joined by author and returning guest Toby Nixon who teaches the gentlemen new words and shares a few stories that will leave you in a state of amused befuddlement. They are also joined by Ulysses, co-founder of RiseRevolt Clothing, who shares some new music he is working on with his new band End Path. They also play a round of India or Mexico before the news.

This week we have a social worker extravaganza! First, we have Miss A a local Chicago social worker who focuses on youth. Jairo, aka Tyrone, aka Jamal, our friend David, aya Hydro, aka Uri, who brings in some golden internet morsels! We have Tony B making his triumphant, he discusses the failed Illinois fair tax act. The gang discusses Sean Connery, the recent election results, open borders, guiding the youth through these tumultuous times, the school landscape with the added social dynamics of LGBTQ+ lifestyles, being a COVID tracker, Melanotan injections, rendering your food, vaginal steaming, Hegelian philosophy, the White House spiritual advisor, KKK costume apology eticate, Republican kitties, the Trump accountability act, and the victory over the war on drug in Oregon, and in the rest of the country

This week we have a special episode, The Almost Positive Great Debate: The Privilege Rainbow!The guys are joined by the greatest minds that have ever graced their measly podcast. The new voice of Almost Positive Carlos Townsend joins and refuses to give advice to the children. Our Chihuahua expert JC joins, only to be yelled that when his facts were too strong to bear. Royce, the cannabis expert is in-studio to compel people to feast on male genitalia. Last but not least, Gaby is in-studio to remind everyone that they are victims and should celebrate that fact.Among the topics our brilliant guests discuss are education, the economy, health care, race relations, Trump vs. Biden, and Almost Positive. This one is for the children! Listen to 4 highly qualified individuals comment on things that are not way over their heads! And at some point, in an intoxicated daze, Sir Rollington starts yelling at people.

This week the guys are joined by cryptozoology experts Yakov and Klaus Neuhaus of the Skinwalker Tapes, who bring in a top 10 list of all the cryptids that matter. The gentlemen are also joined by Dotty Spartans, host of the I Spit in Your Mouth:An Ooky Spooky Podcast who is in to discuss the spooky life, being a fabulous drag queen, and how he gets in touch with his feminine side. In the second half of the show, the gang is joined by Emma Von Rollington to discuss which planets are in retrograde, the history of Halloween, Dia De Los Muertos, and the morbid origins of Snow White. In the news they discuss sex cults, Justices, and Thai Slave Monkeys.

This week, in what can only be described as a sausage party, the guys are joined by future American politician, Tony B, who shares his insights on the fair tax. They are also joined by returning guest Andy who tell us about a traumatic event he survived as a child. As if this wasn't enough, published author and expert in the true nature of women Peter Nolan joints the gang to tell the story of Ogg, and how the matriarchy is the true oppressor of mankind. In the news they discuss the final debate, the Trump Tower Dangler, Hunter Biden’s lap top, Toobin's Zoom incident, as well as police brutality in Nigeria and a love letter from a Trump supporter to Biden supporters. If you have a girlfriend, have her skip this one, or play it for her and disagree vehemently!

This week, in yet another blatant disregard for social distancing the guys are joined by a gaggle of fascinating characters. At the top of the show, they are joined by local Chicago tattoo artists and power-couple, Nena and Keef. Also in-studio are Sir Rollington's barber Jon and one of his clients who came along for the ride (a diamond in the rough) Mauly. They discuss parenting, barber-life, college radio, the radical left, tattoo life, and why it takes to women to lead, apparently, one cant do the job (according to Mauly). Halfway through the show Jon and Mauly take off so that Mauly can get his hair cut, after which the gang is joined by Leo! They discuss films, politics, psychedelics, parenting some more, then Leo sends the gentlemen a very artistic picture of his balls, which we find out are very impressive. Then for the news, they dive deep into the Amy Coney Barrett hearings, the 25th amendment, Guliani's recent racist video, Trump and Biden's recent dueling town halls, the recent ban of Q Anon groups on Facebook, and Hunter Biden's laptop.

This week the guys are joined by Jairo, aka Jamal, aka Tyrone, aka Hydro, aka our friend David, aka Ury for another sexy Destination Unknown. They are also joined again by Steff, one of Sir Rollington's spicy Facebook friends with a great theory: Men Are Stupid! In the audience is also Steff's friend Abby, who chimes in with sprinkles of additional feminine insight.   BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE!! Almost Positive's first-ever Gen-Z guest Layne who was in-studio for some commentary about dating people with kids and she has a few profound questions for the room. The gang discusses dating etiquette, sex etiquette, and social media etiquette. They explore the fine line between creepy and persistent, truly a public service. The gentlemen get into the news where they go over the Vice Presidential Debate highlights, they learn there will be no second debate, hillbillies are kidnapping politicians and Donald Trump is a self-proclaimed perfect physical specimen. Then, for a Positive Note, the guys pay tribute to counterculture hero: Che Guevara. 

This week the guys are joined by long-time friend and first-time guest A.J. a former veterinarian turned budtender who has known the guys since high school. They also joined by Albino Alien, the mother of previous guest Larson. And as if this wasn't enough Alexis (from Ep. 22.5 - Never Forget the Atlantians of 9/11).  The gang discusses being a veterinarian, cannabis, having a squirrel as a pet, parenting, and what it means when chicks have cracked nail polish. The gentlemen take a deep dive into the debates before the news where they partake in all sorts of hot Trump-Talk.

This week the guys are joined by Nerressa, finally making her triumphant return to continue the Tupac conversation. They are also joined by Sugar, a professional online troll and long-time Facebook friend of Sir Rollington's. As if that wasn't enough they are also joined in-studio by Axel, another long-time friend of Sir's with many a hot take. The hand talks Ginsburg's passing Roe vs Wade, what the choice sounds like, the most recent Terminator movie, and interracial relationships. Nerressa shares some of her experiences in social work and her interpretation of Black Lives Matter, the organization, and the movement/idea. Sugar then gets into Cardi B, Lil Kim, her life as a troll, and the group where she and Sir Rollington met; WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE! Axel then gets into social media OnlyFans, and feminism, where we learn that not EVERY woman is a feminist!? In the news Van brings in some Ben Shapiro to explain Van's outlook on the Breonna Taylor situation, Ginsburg lies in state, and Donal Trump is apparently going to set up sandbags in front of the White House if he does not win the election!

This week, live and direct from the kitchen studio, we learn that apparently the men are no better than the women. The guys are joined by the unofficial 4th member of the show: Carlos. Long time friend, local business owner, and renowned Chicago metalhead Ulysses joins the show. At the top of the show, they discuss a riveting list of 12 gender differences with special gues: Angie (Sir's girlfriend) and they also revisit the FLOOR-MATTRESS topic.First, Carlos takes the floor to discuss his and Van's failed wrestling podcast, Sir Rollington's selfish practice of smoking blunts by himself during the show, and how Almost Positive's news segments are complete garbage.  Carlos also insures that Kyle Rittenhouse is discussed for yet another show. As a testament to the production value of the show, Sir forgets Carlos's Jimmy Dore clip.They are then joined by Larson, who discusses the importance of self-presentation, the abundance mindset, white privilege/pride, and his experience as a single father. Ulysses then takes the floor to discuss his last appearance, his clothing brand RiseRevolt and work with Get Yo' Mind Right, a local Chicago mental wellness initiative helping low-income people get free mental health in the Chicago-area.At the tail-end, the gentlemen get into the news, where they discuss the things that really matter, such as Cardi B's divorce. Carlos interjects with what he feels is important news such as the  Denver Nuggets, the stimulus package, and the importance of the election, which is apparently the most important in our lifetimes, except for the fact that it won't matter... Then the guys continued with the news that Kanye the new Moses, and a powerful story about a dentist.

This week, for the unlucky 23rd episode the guys bring together a gaggle of champions of industry from across the globe.  At the top of the show Jairo aka Jamal aka Tyrome aka Hydro, aka Our Friend David aka Uri and discuss mammals, being lied to about vagina by one's parents and they send out a message to show-friend Layne.They are then joined by the rest of this week's roster; coming in from somewhere in the south Etti Purselane, from Australia Andrew Jennings, and from Alaska Richard Sheffield! After a hiatus, a much-needed dose of Destination Unknown, where the conversation takes a turn for the phallic. You will get to listen to a southern lady and an Aussie discuss the finer details of hyena genitalia.Andrew Jennings discusses what Australia even is, how COVID has changed life in the great down-under, the attempted he was on the losing end of, and gender theory according to Andrew.Etti Purselane gives us some insights into how women are portrayed in media, porn, and the twilight saga of films and movies.Richard Sheffield lets us know about life in Alaska, Q-Anon, hiking, and Alaskan animals in the wild.In the news Trump is nominated for a prize, we get an update on the sole survivor of the Kenosha shootings, and then we get an update on the guy that beat up R. Kelly. For the Positive Note, we get some news about the Kardashians.

I this Special Edition Episode (riddle with major technical difficulties, thanks to Homeland Security and Zucc) the guys explore 9/11. First, they speak to George, who believes the official story and provides a unique perspective as someone who saw the moon landing and Kennedy get assassinated. HE also Shares his perspective on conspiracies and why people gravitate toward them. After George, the guys take a deep dive into the full spectrum of conspiracies about 9/11 and beyond with expert theorists Klaus Neuhause, Etti Purselane, and Alexis Rabe. Klaus provides his insights as someone who was in the military at the time, Etti lets us know her perspective as someone who is convinced every major news event is orchestrated and Alexis is just waiting for the boogaloo and to see beautiful dad-bod men clapping while clapping! So don't forget your tin foil hats and strap in!

This week the guys go in DEEP. First, the guys are joined in-studio by Layne, bass player extraordinaire, and Almost Positive’s first ZOOMER!! And Andy, Van, and Sir’s long time high school friend, as well as this week’s diversity quota guest. First, Sir makes a public service announcement for ladies thinking about opening Only Fans pages, then they talk about selling socks and panties, when the gang discovered porn, what it can be like coming out as gay to your parents, white conquerors, and then they ask gay questions.  As if that was not enough they are then joined by two very special people, Las Vegas sex worker, Bhecka Sin who is passionate about helping normalize sex work and end human trafficking. They are also joined by author, Men’s Rights Activist, and MGTOW community member Toby Nixon. Bhecka Discusses the history of sex work in the U.S, the difference between decriminalizing vs legalizing sex work, human trafficking, and the normalizing of sex work. She also shares the personal experiences that lead her to pursue sex work as a career and well as the trauma she survived, shaping who she is now. After some technical difficulties, Toby Nixon joins the program and shares some of the trauma he has survived at the hands of women, and what led him to pursue his involvement with men’s rights as well as MGTOW. He shares his opinion on sex work, Black Lives Matter, and Antifa, and lifts everyone’s spirits with his contagious laughter.After one of Almost Positive’s most powerful segments the guys, along with Layne get into the news, where they talk about Kyle Rittenhouse, 12-year-old Trump supporters getting beat up, the recent warning to Chicago police that gangs are coming together against police brutality, and the man on a Jetpack spotted over L.A. X. Then for the Positive Note, we learn that Ron Jeremy might go to jail for 200 plus years!

In what might be one of the most insightful episodes thus far the guys embarked on a journey that takes many strange turns this week. At the top of the show, the guys are joined in-studio by Royce who is making his first in-studio appearance. They discuss and further examine last week’s floor mattress comments and compare it to one of Sir Rollington’s high controversial theories that claim women with chipped nail polish have bad hygiene. They also talk about Van losing Facebook friends, why Biggie is considered to be one of the best despite his limited catalog, and the sacrifices that come with love. They are then joined by JC to further explore the WAP, as well as the benefits and taboos of bidets, before JC and Royce, explain to the guys what the Electoral College is and does (kinda). As if this was not though! The gentlemen are joined by a special guest to cover a special news topic. A Facebook friend of the show, Daisy joins the show to discuss Bella Thorn starting an Only Fans and why this has caused so much controversy. She gives the guys some insight into online sex work and all the grind it requires. Then naturally, as conversations do, the topic turned into Hitler. After the guys bid Daisy farewell, they continue the news, where they get into Jacob Blake, Kyle Rittenhouse, and R Kelly getting beat up in jail. In some last-minute breaking news Sir shares that Black Panther star Chadwick Boseman passed away from colon cancer (FFFF). And before closing for a bit of fresh air the guys share the Week’s Positive Note; the recent finding of 39 missing children in Georgia. 

This week Almost Positive gives into the raving demands for more female presence on the show. The guys are joined by Sir Rollington’s girlfriend, Angie, and mutual friend of Sir and Van’s, Nerressa (two for one diversity guest!). They are also joined by local metalhead and man well versed in psychology Jose Sanchez. They get into the empowerment Jukebox, shining a light on more intellectual stimulating female MCs, Sir confesses he is being made to watch all the Twilight movies (yes, the teenage vampire love stories), then they discuss “Cuties” an apparently French Netflix series that has been causing an uproar for its portrait of tween girls dancing provocatively. The gang then talks about the male image, body positivity/inclusion for men, and how Kung-Fu Grip G.I. Joe is creating toxic masculinity. After a round of India or Mexico (which Van butchers with his 3rd-grade literacy level) they get into the news, where we find out that the WAP is breaking records, Steve Bannon is a scumbag, N.Y. cops like Trump and the Golden State isn’t being fried on an electric chair. Also, at some point, we learn that women just don’t want men to be happy on their floor-mattresses.

This week's episode is all about female empowerment. We have the stars of episode 13, the infamous lost episode, Tony B and Dishwata. They are also briefly joined by Angie (Sir Rollington's girlfriend) and her sister, who share their opinions about the modern-day feminist anthem WAP. The guys also play a few more jamz in this week's Hoodrat Jukebox. After some intense political talk, the guys discuss the return of DrDisRespect (a topic they discussed in the lost episode) and engage in some more political talk. Tony B shares what his podcast The Existentialists is about before a round of India or Mexico. In the news, we learn that there might be some peace in the Middle East soon (not really), that Russia has a COVID-19 vaccine, and we learn that Yale is discriminating against Whites and Asians but it's OK. Last but never least, on the positive note, the gentlemen discover that nonother than the RZA of the legendary Wu-Tang Clan (who the guys always aim to channel through their work) is making the new Ice Cream Song to replace "Turkey in the Straw" the original, wildly racist track that's brought joy to so many lost American youths for decades.

This week we get the sequel to Episode 11: "Yay! We're All Victims Now!!". In-studio we have Jairo aka Jamal, aka Jerome, aka our friend David aka Ury, we have Emma gracing us with her insights for another week in a row, and Gaby returns to reveal her privilege level via her DNA ancestry test results. The guys play a few bonus tracks from the Pedo Jukebox, they share the joys of getting COVID tests, and Van shares some anecdotes about how dying his hair silver has been for him. Then Gabby and Van share their ancestry test results, turns out they're very privileged and have all sorts of caveman blood coursing through them. Sir Rollington also shares his results, revealing that he is far superior, with a whopping 15% African #melanatedkang. After the results the gang gets into Destination Unknown, where they talk picking cotton, guys with nice buttcheeks, Vans cat stories, the benefits of dietary man-splooge and they try to predict what will happen next in the anime clips Jairo brought in. Last but not least the news is the focus, with stories about canceled 9-year-olds, students getting suspended, Tik Tok, and Joe Biden's opinions about Latino/Hispanic people (totally not racist).

This week the guys dive deep into conspiracy land one-mo-gin. They are joined by Friendly Neighborhood Bruja Emma, who is making her return and as if that wasn't enough, they are also joined by conspiracy correspondent Leo. who is also making a victorious return! They discuss Sir Rollington's recent vacation and spend all their nickles on the jukebox in an effort to expose some of the creepy stuff that seems to be rampant in the music industry. They also get into Pedo-Gate, Q-Anon, Shane Dawson before they play a round of India or Mexico. In the news, we learn about furniture companies that sell children, the Michigan house that was burned down before the community could get to the bottom of the child trafficking ring based in that location and then they update us on Ghislaine Maxwell and the whole Epstein situation. Then, right as it seems like it's all over (because they forgot) we get a rundown of who Jimmy Savile is as well as the reason why children are being bought and sold in a worldwide chain of human trafficking; ADRENOCHROME!

This week the guys have a full house. At the top of the show, the gentlemen discuss Sir Rollington's toxic masculinity, Van Rollington's new blonde hair, and his recent professional fulfillment. The guys are joined by conspiracy connoisseur Klaus Neuhaus and watcher of elite bloodline watcher Etti. They tackle Aryan bloodlines, subliminal video-game priming, and an explosive conspiracy that aims to explain what happened on May 25, 2020 with George Floyd. Toward the tail end of the conversation, they are joined by show-regular Carlos to play a round of India or Mexico. Carlos then unleashes a hail of fire and brimstone on the guys with regard to the issues that have set his soul ablaze; first his outrage at Kanye's presidential bid, then a local Chicago story about a white man who dared to sell ice cream out of a cart, then a story about the slippery slope that is booty tapping. After the fury of Carlos, the guys get into the new where we learn about Isaiah Jackson, the recent closure of a Houston Chinese Consulate (aka a spy ring), and a romantic story about a lady who sets her ex's car on fire. 

This week the guys are joined by Youtube mash-up legend Bill McClintock and audience favorite JC. They talk Will and Jada drama, Snoop Dogg drama, and the fundamentals of a good mash-up. They also revisit centrist hell and play a round of India or Mexico, after which they get into the news. In the news, we find out that genocide and conquest are OK, but liking Trump is where the line is drawn for Luis Gutierez. We also learn that Nick Cannon was not immune to a certain brand of cancel culture, despite being melanated, and that Pornhub is soon going to get defunded.

This week the guys really felt the true meaning of the number 13. We learn that the night before they recorded what might have been Almost Positive's greatest efforts, only for it to be deleted in one of Van's stoner stupors. Jairo aka Jamal aka Jerome aka Our Friend David aka Hydro joins us in-studio along with special show-friend Carlos Townsend. They talk about Kanye's 2020 presidential run, and Sir demands that Van stop playing games with the audience's emotions and take his DNA test already. The gentlemen also do a hillbilly flavored Destination Unknown, they get a voicemail from show-favorite Royce, who shares some food for thought. We take another trip down the PR nightmare that is India or Mexico and then jump into the news.  in the news they explore the Goya boycotts, the Terry Cruz vs Don Lemon fiasco, as well as how much Don Lemon has grown since the days when he believed in self accountability. Towards the tail end of the show the guys talk about the latest self inflicted hate crime as they try their best to find something positive to close on for the day. 

In this episode Almost Positive celebrates America! The gentlemen are joined in-studio by show-regular Carlos. Sir shares some stories about growing up wanting to come to America and Van talks about his recent deep dive into the Terminator movies. After a well deserved tribute to the U.S.A. Angie, Sir's girlfriend calls to educate the guys on how non profits work, and what is actually behind recent political movements. Before the news Van share an India or Mexico (a tribute to Germany or Florida) story to see if anyone can guess where the story is from. In the news we hear about Fortnite's important contributions to social justice, we get some updates on Jeffrey Epstein (who didn't kill himself) and his right hand lady Ghislaine Maxwell who was recently arrested. The guys discuss the new movement "Abolish Amazon" and discuss recent wrestling event, basically, there's lots of perverts wrestling. 

This week we're all victims at Almost Positive and it feels so good! The guys have a jam-packed episode filled with all sorts of light brown bodies in-studio. The show kicks off with best-friend of the show Jairo aka Jamal, aka Jerome, aka our friend David who brings us an unforgettable Destination Unknown. We also get a heaping dose of Gabby our expert in-house sociologist. And as if that wasn't enough flavor our friendly neighborhood witch, Emma joins us to hunt down pedophiles and shape-shifters.At the top of the show there's an exploration of Black Lives Matter, defund the police, and the school to prison pipeline (Sir likes to call it the home to prison pipeline, but that's gonna take while to catch on). We learn natural skin care remedies, it comes to light that Reverse Flash might be a pedo, and we get an update about Lovely Peaches and her sexual goals, which naturally leads to a conversation about Flat Earth. The guys then make an important statement and begin to take actions to right their wrongs with Apology 2.0. The gentlemen and ladies get into the news, where we find out Kellogg's is racist, Ron Jeremy might, probably definitely be a sex offender and Chaz is over. As if that wasn't enough, apparently there was short-lived 30 year, state sponsored German child abuse study where old men and boys were the science. At some point the show devolves into a shouting battle of the sexes, reptile shape shifter talk, and it comes out that we're all victims just waiting for the chance to one day be Officer Chauvin.

For this episode the guys have long time friend and manliest man they know, the legendary Drano. A special edition episode that explores what it was like for him growing up in the far west side of Chicago, in a Hispanic neighborhood, where his white privilege wasn't accepted currency. He tells us what it was like being in fist fights every day on his way to and from school. We learn how he turned his life around from being a self professed (and third party confirmed) scumbag to an exemplary American. He tells us how he came to find his destiny as someone who has dedicated their life to helping his community as a paramedic. Drano also shares what it was like going through the COVID-19 crisis and the riots following the murder of George Floyd. 

This week the guys get toasted, just in time for 4/20. At the top of the show they talk about wrestler New Jack, the recent shooting of Rashad Brooks and how social workers will soon save the world! Then the gentlemen are joined by 2 very special individuals; Melinda Meme, long time (online) friend of Van and Sir but most importantly a cannabis expert and fellow shit poster! In addition the man, the legend, Royce joins the conversation. We get the scoop on the latest acts of Corporate solidarity, we learn about Nancy Green, a woman whose legacy deserves to be remembered and we find out that ICP was anti-racist way before it was cool to be "anti-racist". The guys also talk about the escalating conflicts between both India and China as well as North and South Korea. And for this week's positive note we learn that Van Rollington is invited to the barbecue. 

This week the guys see the light. At the top of the show the guys wonder if the Democrats are just continuing Charles Manson's Helter Skelter plans. Sir Rollington shares his recent experience at a local "protest" that involved finger foods, Jesse Jackson and VIP passes. Then Van shares a story of an interview he was part of where his experiential data was not valid. The first guest this week is James Saenz, host of From The Dust Podcast a show where people who've had life changing experiences share their stories and testimonials. James share his experience through going covid and his take on the chaos that was sparked in the aftermath of the George Floyd murder. Before making his exit James shares some scripture to inspire unity. Following James the gentlemen are joined by Fire Chief Stan who shares his experiences of having been in the military as well as the state police and then becoming a fire chief in charge of 5 fire stations. He tells us how he over came his circumstances growing up in one of Chicago's most violent neighborhoods. The chief also gives us some insight into how the fire department handled the riots and chaos. After the chief our gracious hosts share a clip from Dial-Up Daisy, who just wants to seek justice with and for People Of Color. As the show winds down the news comes in hot with more displays of solidarity from our friendly Neighborhood corporations. They also get into the Seattle's Capital Hill Autonomous Zone, Cancel Culture, Mexican White Supremacists, and what happens when white privilege is the wrong card to play. In closing the guys shed some light on the Player's Coalition, a group of Justice Seekers actually making a change in their search for justice. We also learn that Almost Positive now has a Hotline: 312-715-7587‬, a safe space for people with some shit to say, complaints, questions, or anyone that wants to share their truth with the universe.

In this special edition of Almost Positive Coast 2 Coast Edition they guys talk fellow meme war veteran Leo. They discuss the Existence of Kek, the malevolent Moloch as well as the true omnipotent nature of order and chaos. In addition they reveal highly compromising information about Jeffrey Epstein and a global cabal of pedophile perverts. The gentlemen also discus mental health, Nickelodeon, the Joker, Clown world and pizzagate. Take an unadulterated look into a place in the culture, in the internet that few have seen.

This week the guys break records with an almost 4 hour long episode. The rants are towering infernos of nothing but flames and fire. Social justice fills the air and unity illuminates the path forward as special guest and local entrepreneur (Check out RiseRevolt Clothing) Ulysses joins, in-studio, to help sort through the mess of the riots and protests in Chicago. First everyone shares a few stories about the riots. Then they have a new guest, Trey Johnson, co-host of NintenDomain Podcast, where they get into all things Nintendo. He shares insights into podcasting, some Nintendo news and his own experience with the riots in his neighborhood. The second half of the show kicks off in full gear as Ulysses gets the ground to give us the low down on everything that's been going on in Chicago since the murder of George Floyd at the hands of former police officers Derek Chauvin, Tou Thao, J. Alexander Kueng and Thomas Lane. He gives us the full picture of how the Latino community in Chicago has shown support for the fight against police brutality and how the media has been inaccurately portraying the whole situation. Ulysses gives eye witness reports of events and brings us hope that unity might be possible. For the last part of the show we get some news. The gentlemen also discuss new Chicago legend the Dread-head Cowboy, who has been bringing joy to Chicagoans during these trying time, which Van considers to be a moot point. We learn how big corporations are showing solidarity to the people in the struggle, including Lego and dating app Grindr. We hear some words of wisdom from the legendary Immortal Technique and watch as police keep abusing their power. They leave the show with a positive note on how the police, and local gangs joined forces during the riots and almost started a race war. 

This week we get a special edition episode! The guys have Carlos Townsend, long time friend of the show and even longer time friend of Van and Sir Rollington. In addition this is Almost Positive’s first in-studio session! Social Distancing be damned. At the top of the show Carlos shares his thought on the murder of Geroge Floyd at the hands of police officers Derek Chauvin, Tou Thao, J. Alexander Kueng and Thomas Lane. Carlos then gets moving from Milwaukee, WI to Cicero, IL, where he was one of the only black kids in a town (at the time, made up of an over 80% Hispanic population). He digs into the positive and negative experiences he had including people wanting to touch his hair, why he talks the way he’s always talked and his efforts to change people’s minds through his actions. Carlos also shares his experiences as a registered Republican, where he actually falls on the political spectrum (Left wing libertarian) and having voted for Trump in 2016. Sit back, relax, light some herbs and listen as we talk to one of the good ones.

This week the guys get into the tragic incident that took place in Minneapolis where four police officers took the life of unarmed George Floyd. We then find out that Almost Positive has been crossing borders throughout the world, or maybe just being listened to through VPNs. The gentlemen then talk to an insightful southern woman of mystery who goes by Etti Purselane. She walks the guys through the history of an ancient lineage of of people that have been holding secret knowledge through out human history and are still reaching havoc on the people of earth. They also discuss Atlantis, Ancient Egypt and how it all ties into our modern experiences. After that the guys are joined by Royce a new friend to the show who has known Sir Rollington for years, when they served together as kitchen sluts. Royce shares his perspective on the loss of George Floyd at the hands of police brutality and shares his experiences with police harassment and the fact that he feels that he wakes up suspect every day in America. For the news they talk about Karens and the Bird watcher situation that happened in New York, the negative economic repercussions of saving money during the covid crisis and finally they give a shout out to Sudan, where female genital mutilation is finally being outlawed.

This week the guys are joined not by one guest, not by two, but by 3 brilliant minds. At the top of the show they get into Joe Biden's peek behind the Democratic machine's mindset about black people, after which they talk about the situation that unfolded in Brunswick, Georgia where a couple good ol' boys shot Ahmaud Arbery while he was either out for a brisk jog or robbing houses. After the sobering conversation about death and destruction they touch on ASMR and show-favorite, Cardi B's fascination with weird sounds. The gentlemen also pour out a cool 40 oz for "Double Rainbow Guy" Paul Vasquez as well as a few others we've recently lost, including Joe Biden's chances at being president. Making his triumphant return to the show is Jairo, aka Jamal, aka Jerome, AKA David (his new name). He takes us down another internet rabbit hole involving Australian infomercials, Icelandic penis museums, and progressive African preachers. To close this week's Destination unknown the guys take a quiz to determine how straight they are not. The show is then graced by Chicago Witch Emma Von Rollington, who finally lets the guys know the difference between astrology and astronomy. After learning a few more definitions they do Horoscopes. However, Emma also has a list of topics the gentlemen were less than graceful in handling, and she sets them straight. For the last turd of the show the guys do the news. They have COVID news, more COVID news, followed by... COVID news. After some COVID news Carlos Townsend, a human, makes a surprise visit to give us his two cents on Joe Biden's attack on people like him, Anthony Fauci's short-comings, and people responsibility to bring about real change through voting. 

This week the guys pay tribute to one of the greats, Little Richard, a bad ass who never gave a shit and is now with our lord and savior! Van tells a story about him and his friend buying wieners and beer while violating Chicago's new Mormon-COVID-19 restrictions. Van also informs us about the nuances of animal consent. After that the guys welcome first time guest Uriel, Almost Positive's IT consultant to discuss remote meetings, increased productivity while working at home and administrative boomer demise due to the burden they are on the young, beautiful, and computer literate. After some tech talk the guys are condemned with walking us through centrist hell. A place where reasonable, fair minded people go to suffer the consequences of their sound logic! They talk about the divide of the media along political lines, using one's vote against their hated candidate rather than for someone they want to be represented by, and Sir Rollington then wishes the government could have provided him with a father when growing up so that he wouldn't have ended up dropping out of high school twice and living a life of poverty and crime. In the news the gentlemen welcome back the undisputed king of New York, Tekashi 69. They also dive deep into street culture, poverty, and the destructive aspects of religion, religion place-holders and why snitching is actually OK.

This week the gentlemen are all about inclusion and diversity. In yet another ill-advised PR move they try to bring in some new perspective. First they share the good news that Van Rollington does not have the coof and then they play a sad song for the poor people that are just now, in 2020, finding out that the two party system is a sham. Then they talk to Gaby, a political statistics expert who is also sociologist and long time friend of the guys. They touch on environmental injustices, red lining and prison reform, until Gaby has an unexpected guest, forcing her to cut the conversation short. Luckily the guys had another very special guest, Carlos Townsend, one of Almost Positive's most egregious detractors and critics. He shares various actually informative news stories including the Reopen America Again plans, killer hornets, and the impact COVID-19 has had on the nachos at his bar. They also learn that in a post COVID-19 world not even nurses can be trusted. Before closing, for some positive news we learn about San Francisco's strategy to provide their homeless drugs and medically appropriate amounts of alcohol so they don't go outside and spread the virus. Before they close they leave the audience with a great, practical piece of advice regarding how to avoid fogging up one's glasses while being a responsible citizen and wearing one's mask. 

This week the guys get into the letter Donald Trump sent every American that got Stimulus money, and why it was translated in Spanish on the back. They also get into the strange decisions one has to make when in positions of power and how things become less black and white. In Destination Unknown we learn proper rectal hygiene from Cardi B, how to transport cadavers in lieu of a refrigerated truck, and we learn about Portland drive-through strip clubs. In the news the gentlemen Talk about Joe Biden’s apparent speech impediment. In a surprising turn of events it comes to light that Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un might be alive. In Texas News we learn that The Netflix Waco show made Van Rollington cry, and they also find out that Alex Jones is planning on eating his neighbors. Canadians have their guns taken away after mass shootings and Amazon workers demand dignity, however this might interfere with timely deliveries, which is unacceptable. The show closes with an inspirational story about a house party in Chicago that refused to let the virus keep them from bouncing and breaking their backs.

This week's episode is a special bonus episode. A leaked classified broadcast where the guys take a deep dive into a few conspiracies. First they talk about Skinwalker Tapes a reputable source for all things Cryptozoology and conspiracies. After that they shed some light on Chinese involvement with Zoom, the cloud video and audio conferencing app that has taken over work, school and personal communications for many people throughout the nation. Since all roads in 2020 lead to China, they tackle the COVID-19 pandemic and the possible involvement of Bill Gates in the matter, as well as the possibility of it being a bio-engineered weapon to cease control of the globe. Strap in and be sure to wear your nicest tin foil snap back for this ride through matters better left unspoken.

This week Van and Sir Rollington are joined (FOR THE ENTIRE SHOW) by Jamal, aka, Jarome, aka Jairo who graced us for an entire hour and forty minutes with immersive background noise, the likes of which very few men can make so enjoyable. They also discuss their first shout out by long time internet comrade Klaus Neuhaus who is a frequent guest on The Skinwalker Tapes, a podcast where they discuss cryptids and conspiracies while getting intoxicated. The gentlemen also talk about screwdrivers, condom bombings, and the untimely murder of a homeless man by a very high nurse. They also dive deep into Fans Only pages, and sex dolls. Last but not least, the guys get into the news, where they talk about Little Rocket man’s health scare rumors, and shed some light on broke, droopy eyed, perverts. Of Course the guys close on some good news regarding glaciers and the fact that Almost Positive is now on ALL important streaming services!

Today's Almost Positive is our final testing phase episode. Essentially what people should expect, for better or worse. We discuss positive body image and the fact that Ken should also be made with different body types to be inclusive like Barbie. Van shares some lessons he learned from the Tiger King himself Joe Exotic. At some point, there’s a call made to a very grumpy and uncooperative Carlos Townsend, a long time friend of Van and Sir Rollington. Jamal aka Jarome, aka Jairo, calls in to share some enriching internet content in this week’s Destination Unknown. He brings is a movie review of the 2008 Korean disaster film “The Flu” where a gaggle of illegal immigrants sneak into Korea with a deadly disease. The gentlemen also take a quiz to find out with Christian Prophet Van is and what famous Illuminati person Sir is. He also shares a riveting article about a man who combated erectile dysfunction in the early 1099s by replacing men's’ testicles with goat testicles. Dial-up Daisy is compromised by a P.P.E. package received from Amazon. Jordan Peterson makes a shocking surprise appearance to respond to Sir Rollington’s teacher's critique of Peterson’s toxic masculinity. For some good news, we discuss Bernie’s campaign “suspension”. Before closing, we explore the positives of the quarantine including taking phone calls from work clients on podcasting equipment.