Back Row Seating

We had Hot Girl Summer; now it's time for Hot Dude Winter. Welcome to Hot Frosty, the first of many oddly regular hot men movies to grace the streaming waves this holiday season! As an aficionado of the Lifetime holiday film circuit, we're gonna see how Netflix replicates the same formula of two attractive people in snow trying to get it on, maybe. Remember Christmas Unleashed? In any case, have a holly, jolly Thanksgiving, American listeners :)

*not Elementals It's time to check out the Pixar answer to Zootopia, with elementals battling social issues and generational trauma rather than animals. This time, though, we have Monstera heads, kitschy Irish-themed shirts, and oddly alarming relationship cues, so surely nothing could wrong, right? Turns out the antagonists were the friends we made along the way all along :')

or "That Atlantis movie when Disney was making unique 2D animation". We're hitting up my childhood once again, rediscovering the joys of this film like 1914 people rediscovering Atlantis. A wonderful cast of memorable characters and legit attention to proto-language details will definitely lend to cult hit status, but will it meet my adult standards? Let's find out!

Oooh, boy! Time to finally see the "bathtub scene"! On the heels of an insane rise to internet fame for its weirdness, it's time for me to check out 'Saltburn' and see what all the hubbub is about. As an aficionado of weird films, I'm all here for it! Certainly nothing will make me uncomfortable, right?

*There are some audio issues for the first nine minutes or so, but it's fine afterwards :) Another glorious summer. It makes me sick... Fortunately, autumn is fast approaching, except in Texas, but I hear it's the most wonderful time of the year up in the Northeast U.S.! So why not bring along a true Bostonian to school us in the ways of leaf peeping and witchcraft? The magical tome of spells in question? Well, I've never seen Hocus Pocus beyond the scores of branded t-shirts and craft supplies that flood retail stores in October, so how about we give it a shot! Then my coworkers won't be so revolted by my 'not seen' list :')

It's time to hop into the way-way-back machine and hop into another Paul Thomas Anderson romp through the 1970's! only this time, it's spearheaded by my longtime film-nemesis, Mark Wahlberg... That said, there's an all-star cast surrounding this young lad, so perhaps it won't be too hard to watch; we already know PTA's soundtrack and atmosphere will be on point. Surely we won't see Markie Mark's o-face or anything; that would be weird!

Fresh off the heels of, like, two different studios, Disney wanting nothing to do with this, Nimona finally graces our eyeballs after being rescued by Annapurna and Netflix! Two or three years or waiting, and I am totally here for it! A little anti, and a little hero, I'm all kinds of ready for Nimona's energy. How about you? Get your transmog hats on; it's time to get metal!

This episode has a very high level of badness for its size. We'll have to fix that, with abnormal dialogue about alien taxonomy! but, really, this movie is about family, which not even Gantu is stronger than. Straight from that soft spot of my childhood comes, perhaps, my favorite Disney film -along with Hercules, Hunchback, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast (all number one, duh)- brings a ton of great memories, and certainly one of the best animated characters in history. So let's check it out again and get in touch with our inner city-destroying experiment!

Oh, childhood. When things were so innocent, and before we hit ludicrous speed into adulthood. Back with a vengeance from my brother and my childhoods is Spaceballs the Movie! a wonderfully all-ages adventure through Mel Brooks' Star Wars parody. Join my brother and I as we sleepily recount this staple of our childhood, and hope we don't get captured by Pizza the Hut before the ending.

If you read the description for the Van Helsing episode, and you also know better, you might know that TheDeadedNeko made a fool of me... Well, now it's time for my retribution! Going into this with zero clue as to what we're watching, watch as our Neko friend is terrified to learn that we're watching four old ladies thirsting over Tom Brady for an hour and a half, with Guy Fieri! Well, now that I think about it, this punishment might have backfired...

Once more, into the branch! or breach. Definitely the Whomping Willow. We return to the wizarding world of Hogwarts with two new guests, and find the universe to be far more dark and harrowing than the previous two entries. What gives? Well, Alfonso Cuarón happened, and sweet, sneaky murder happened, at least toward Lily and James Potter. Between that and ratatouille being cooked, what else awaits our unsuspecting viewers?! Come along for the ride and find out!

Oh, Canada... In a film that wholly sticks to the stereotypes of South Park, Stan Helsing manages to keep me laughing- to keep me from crying. At least Kenan Thompson is along for the ride, but I don't think Van Stan from Reba or two legitimately good jokes will be enough for me to survive this one... And just when I thought Van Helsing (2004) was a schlock fest, we manage to stumble upon a film that's even worse! Oh no, Canada...

What do you do when your buddy loves spoof movies, wants to guest star on your podcast on all of them, and talks VERY highly about Stan Helsing, in particular? Well, I guess that means we have to start back at the nexus: Van Halsing. While I've never seen it, I'm quite familiar with the Underworld films, the Resident Evil films, all the early 2000s "dark" horror fare upon which this film seems to be propagated around. The biggest difference? Probably Hugh Jackman, whom I'm a big fan of, so hopefully I won't regret this viewing too much so long as he has a part to play..?

I'm a big fan of heist movies, but I also enjoy cute and fun animal characters. So you can imagine my surprise one night when I woke up in a daze, desperately terrified of there being no real way to combine the two things! Boy, was I in luck to discover that The Bad Guys was exactly what I'd been waiting for! And it also features Sam Rockwell, to boot? Count me in faster than two shakes of a thorax tail!

Well hey! We're gonna get on back to my 90's childhood with a movie released a year before I was born; and certainly one that is quite a bit near and dear to my heart. As somebody who's never exactly pined for the mainstream assembly, I've always had something of an affinity for Belle as a character, and we're going to explore, not only her, but the film as a whole, including Disney mad attempts to claw out a spot for an Oscar on their trophy rack! So I hope you all enjoy!

I've been waiting for this! One of the best reasons to wax poetic about the internet is the wide spread of information, so you can bet I was in awe when I saw an image online of a half-man half-bear creature wielding a rail gun in what was supposed to be "the Russian Avengers". Needless to say, I moved heaven and Earth to find a copy, and now here we are, atop the precipice of greatness. Will this film be off-the-wall amazing? or 'one of the worst films ever made' as touted by Wikipedia? Only one way to find out...

Part rock-opera, part historical drama, part societal critique, part biwa shredding, part allegory, the trailer for this film kind of promised just about everything under the sun within this period piece. While my knowledge of Japanese history is dodgy at best, we're gonna dive in and ensconce our ears with a great soundtrack, at the very least, hopefully!

We're off to face abnormal social norms on the fictitious island of Inisherin! Having heard nothing but glowing reviews about this hilariously dark humored film, I'm quite excited to check in and see what all is going on in Martin McDonagh's filmography; after all, this is a reunion between him and the two lead actors. Will it live up to the height? I mean, it was nominated for Best Picture against my reigning best film of 2022, Everything Everywhere All At Once, so let's see how this pan's out! Perhaps we'll even go 2-2 on films including a character named "Jenny"..?

It's Oscar season! and you know what that means? Snub lists galore of films unduly left out of the festivities. First and foremost among them is RRR, which was nominated for an original song Academy Award, but which falls far short of the praise many of this film's fans feel it deserves. So we're gonna check it out and see if they have a point! I've heard just about everything there is to hear about a movie when it comes to RRR, so I'm expecting a baller time- maybe with some bromance stuff, hmm??

Ah, childhood. So much fun, what with the majesty of staying up all night, not caring about health or the well-being of others beyond my immediate sphere of external understanding, and giant Pokémon gods stealing mothers and using them to fulfill the fever dream of a tiny girl. Yes, that means it's time to check out the third Pokémon film! one of the most baller films of my childhood, right there nestled along with Digimon: The Movie and Spy Kids. Does it hold up? Heck if I know; we'll just have to rewatch it- that's what we do here!

Ah, yes; everybody loves tier lists! Maybe even auditory ones! We're gonna take a look back at all the films we covered in 2022, starting all the way back with Encanto and concluding with Strange World, as well as everything in between. What were the stars? the let-downs? Which films have I adjusted my opinions on since we checked it out on the podcast? Only time will tell, or perhaps this very episode will tell. So join us for another bout of filmmaking review as we take a victory lap around 2022 and prepare for another year of wonderful films!

We're off to discover some strange worlds! and as a lifelong lover of sci-fi adventure animation (Titan A.E. and Atlantis, to name a couple) I'm very thrilled to check out Disney next magical romp! Plus, there's supposed to be a dog in there somewhere; what's not to love, already, about this film? We're gonna find out, that's for sure!

It's a hard knock life, for- Oh wait. We love pattern-seeking here on the Back Row Seating podcast, so when a film we've previously watched gets a musical adaptation adapted into film, it's time to jump at the chance! So how will this compare to the original film? The portrayal of child neglect has changed dramatically in the last twenty-something years; surely they're not gonna have Matlida et al. facing legitimate dangers, right? Right?

Throwback to my days in Catholic school! It's time to flip through the last twenty years and check out Dreamworks' magnum opus, quite possibly; we're heading to biblical Egypt for IMAX vistas, and non-Judean voices as we recover our memories of one of my childhood favorites. The soundtrack certainly remains a banger, but we'll check out everything else to find out if the Prince has actually become a King! So sit back, and enjoy this magical romp through the Egyptian landscape!

Playing in the background simply to have sound, I discovered this gem in a series of passthroughs in front of my television; and oh my goodness, it this film pretty out of this world. Featuring a lead who LOVES her dog, but not enough to actually find him, to a hunk-a-dunk who LOVES dogs, and is basically Superman for dogs, but also not enough to actually find the dog- instead they choose to fall back in love. Couldn't that have waited? Hell no! It's a Lifetime movie, not Taken. Pour on some eggnog, folks; this is gonna be a fun ride.

Returning to the monde of French cinema, we're going to check out this sort-of adaptation of a beloved children's classic! "Sort-of" because it's more a story about the story, interestingly enough, so we're already in for an exciting time! Will it take me back to my childhood? or keep me in my adult-view of critiquing films endlessly? Only time, specifically a hundred or so minutes, will tell!

But I bet you weren't expecting this! Halloween, the holiday, is almost upon us, and one of my mother's favorite holiday films is Halloween, the movie. So while I've not seen any of these, it's time for me to be schooled in the art of late-70's horror, particularly of the John Carpenter variety. But camp abounds, as well as older-than-teenage actors; how will I enjoy this horror classic?

Ah yes, we're here to continue trilogies and chew bubble gum. Pressing on with Tim Burton's stop-motion "Halloween" films, we're gonna travel back to the Regency for a good ol' love story! Just one with revenants, of course; what else were you expecting? Having quite enjoyed Nightmare Before Christmas, I'm excited to check this one out, and see if it can't check some of my hopeless romantic check boxes out while it's at it (spoilers, it does, sort of).

Continuing our not-Halloween Halloween films, we're just gonna prance on over to some spoopy foreign films! and what better than a film from Denmark! Seriously though, as a hardcore introvert, this film is about at socially terrifying as anything else, and that's all before the psychological horror begins. For being a box office disappointment, it does have glowing reviews, so perhaps this will be my kind of film after all. Raise your stamppot!

While not a Halloween movie, it is a spoopy movie, and that counts just as well in October, right? Well, if it's a good movie, I suppose it would count. But is Darkness Falls any good? I dunno; I watched it when I was twelve, and I """liked""" it enough to watch it more than once and have a shot burned into my brain-hole, so it must have had some redeeming qualities? Maybe I was just a dumb kid, who knows, but we're gonna find out on this episode of Back Row Seating!

Yo! It's time to return to the world of Hogwarts! Only this time, we're not alone... With TheDreadedNeko in tow, and a new cinematographer, the world of the second film installment of Harry Potter is our oyster. Will it improve upon the original? Only a watch will tell, but I can tell you already that the two of us at Hogwarts certainly would see the detention hall a lot. Wait until the end for TheDreadedNeko to get sorted into his house!

Confession time: I've never seen this film before... Growing up with then-pious parents, Halloween was very much a foreign, uncelebrated holiday growing up, so I've often lacked the "magic" of the season. What better way to start October with a film that's very much about the spirit of Halloween? Let's see how it stacks up to the decades of praise!

I'm shippin' up to Boston! In preparation for my trip to Beantown, we're gonna revisit one of my favorite crime/mob films; directed by the great Scorsese himself. Yes, let's have our mind's blown by the subversive plot twists, Mark Wahlberg's placid acting, and by all the handfuls of drugs being thrown about by Jack Nicholson.

Pinocchio again! Having reviewed the original, it's time to begin the Year of Pinocchio with the Disney+ remake starring Tom Hanks and my main man, Luke Evans et. al.! The critical response to this film has been deplorable, but as somebody with zero nostalgia for the original, I'm intrigued to see where Disney might have improved upon the original film, which was in dire need of it, certainly. So let's get this show on the road! It can't be any worse than the scary version from the 90s...

The Year of Pinocchio has begun! Not at all a staple of my 90s-kid childhood, I can't even remember ever watching the original 1940 version of the Disney classic, although I must have seen it, given my traumatic recollection of one of it's more terrifying scenes- and it is a children's movie, right?! In any case, in order to see the present, we much first view the past: where all these current iterations owe their existence. So let's go back and check it out!

In 2009, I was told not to watch this film. Ironically, I was told that by one of /my/ 'Summer's'. While I never put much stock in that recommendation, for whatever reason, I kept putting this film off- from one Summer, to another Summer- and now it's 2022 and I'm finally sitting down to watch it. When will the catharses end?! Whatever we feel, at least we'll have Joseph Gordon-Levitt

*This is the theatrical cut of the film, not the extended edition We're taking it back to my 90's kid childhood, ladies and gentlemen! Nine-year-old me was chompin' on Oreos and mini Doritos still, and my suspension of disbelief was at an all-time high. So how will adult me view this same film? I don't dislike this series, but after the third book, the time commitment going forward appeared immense, so I stopped after what was my favorite of the books (and films) so far. So we're gonna fix that and watch 'em all!

Holy Wolfwalkers vibes, Batman! I'm super stoked to check out this wild adventure film straight outta Netflix, largely due to how massive the trailer seemed to be setting up the world. My biggest presumption is that it'll be too large, and the pacing will be wonky, so let's see how true or false that turns out to be! Anchor's away, and yar'hoy!

Hey, Lightyear is here! and my preclusions for this film have already been confusing based off of the trailers and teasers. Is this a mature film for the now-adults who grew up with the original Toy Story 1-2? or is it a silly kid adventure for all audiences? Maybe the 1970's David Bowie fans?! Who knows! but we'll find out.

I've been super excited for this film ever since I first saw the teaser and saw, not just interesting imagery, but Jessie Buckley! whose work I was first mystified by in 'I'm Thinking of Ending Things', which was a film, somewhat, about masculinity- now we're watching 'Men'! which should prove to be another film along the same theme. I know nothing about it except for the heated discussions in some of my online groups, so I'm voraciously excited to check this out for myself. Join me for the ride!

Almost reaching Logan levels of "Oh, this is the best movie ever made!", The Batman is breaking expectations left and right, so we're gonna check it out! I've always loved Robert Pattinson as an actor, and that's even before getting to the rest of this stellar cast. Throw in some nice trailers, and I've been readily excited to see this film; but with my expectations so high, The Batman already has a substantial hill to climb. Let's see how it matches up! -Check Out TheDreadedNeko's Channel!- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeN-onY3HmBJZln6XQ_Xb5A

Groovy, baby! We're finally at the finale of the Austin Powers trilogy, and Fusion is 1-1, so far, in his affections toward the series. That means Goldmember will break the tie, but which side will the final movie fall? Join the two of us as we conclude this romp through the shagadelic 70's!

Paul Thomas Anderson has returned! and I'm excited to experience his latest film, not merely because Cooper Hoffman stars in it. I do like PTA's work an awful lot, and if nothing else, his films are always well-crafted, if not near-masterpieces (looking at you, 'There Will Be Blood'...), or outright esoteric and strange (Magnolia...) so I'm intrigued to see where Licorice Pizza ranks in his catalogue of films that hover across different genres like a crane machine

One of my favorite films of all time is Kaufman's 'Synecdoche, New York'; so of course, it wasn't long before I stumbled upon the myriad of articles and criticisms out there that another film from the 60's, Frederico Fellini's '8½', espoused much of the same themes, with some claiming the former having ripped off Fellini's work. As a lover of most things post-modern, I've had a hankering to check out Fellini's magnum opus, as some would say, so let's douse that hankering right this moment! I hope you guys have some snacks, because this will be a long one!

We conclude our Wild West double-feature with the second of three released-and-development-hell Shanghai series films, Shanghai Knights! Rolling into England with the same writers, and a director hand-picked by Jackie Chan, I wonder how much different this film will be compared to its predecessor? I sense a lot of oldies music waiting in the wings for us! -Links in the Show Notes- https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/576908/famous-non-brits-named-honorary-knights-dames https://www.mentalfloss.com/posts/scorpio-pizza-oven-indiegogo

It's time for a double feature! A Wild West double feature! One of my favorite action/buddy-cop/bromance series from my children, the Shanghai series has always been a joy for me and the bromances in my life. Owen Wilson is feathery-blonde and charming, and Jackie Chan is hilarious and full of stunt set pieces; easily set alongside Rush Hour as the top of Chan's buddy-cop collection of films. This time, we're headed to Nevada to save the princess, and learn a little bit more about ourselves along the way. How has the indigenous peoples' presentation within the film aged in twenty-two years? Are Gough and Millar a brainstorming genius team of comedy script writers? I don't know! We'll have to check it out to see! -Links in the Show Notes- http://www.bluecorncomics.com/shanghai.htm

Dumb bunnies, sly foxes, and other members of the 90/10 prey-to-predator ratio pack unite! It's time to explore the bright and colorful world of Zootopia, and while I recall viewing this back in the year of its release, I'm excited to reacquaint myself with it and examine it from a newly critiquing eye. If we know one thing going in, it's thing digital animation has come far enough to ensure the fuzziness will be on point!

After a horrendous technical issue, Demon and I decide to press on into that wild green yonder and straight into Seth Green's smexiness! A childhood classic of his, I remain a bit iffy on whether this is the better of the two films; although, it's been a long while- maybe another viewing is just what I need to rethink my opinion... Check out TheDreadedNeko: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeN-onY3HmBJZln6XQ_Xb5A

From obscurity to social media blockbuster- literally! Becoming A24's biggest grossing film, EEAAO has become a massive success, and I've heard so many people talk about it being the best thing ever, while a few others say it's a disappointing film. I'm always happy for a Michelle Yeoh vehicle; let's see what she's up to, along with evil-character Jamie Lee Curtis, so let's check it out and see which it is!

Right off the heels of a Cannes Grand Prix win, I was instantly intrigued by a "supernatural romantic drama" film such as this. Add in a dash of foreign film, a bit of cinematography gold, and you have a recipe for this podcast! Let's check out Mati Diop's interesting romp through Senegal, and find out a bit about the Atlantic Ocean, maybe!

Ladies and gentlemen! It's guilty pleasure time! While I'm no stranger to musicals, and quite love the genre in general, Moulin Rouge! just slaps in a magically delirious wave of magnificence that just tugs at my ears as well as my heartstrings. The colors, the music, the cinematography, the oddly questionable editing decisions- I'm here for all of it, and I hope you'll join me on this romp through Montmartre.