Regular Features

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Steve, Log, Joe, Matt and Gav struggle heroically to find a feature worth repeating

Regular Features


    • Aug 13, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekly NEW EPISODES
    • 44m AVG DURATION
    • 507 EPISODES

    Listeners of Regular Features that love the show mention: bants, british, horrible, four, men, politics, educational, laugh, hilarious, review, excellent, best, talk, like, guys, highly, great, good, listening, erotic short.



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    Latest episodes from Regular Features

    499: Q&A With Johnny Magoo

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 13, 2022 62:47

    On the eve of the episode 500 live show, all five Feature boys got together, drank far too much, and recorded a question-and-answer session. We don't regret it one bit ACTUALLY.

    498: Amber Gambler Honey Complaints

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 5, 2022 46:57

    Everybody likes to say things are "out the wazoo", but nobody ever asks "how's the wazoo". Nobody ever inspects the wazoo to make sure its hard-working chute isn't red raw with all the stuff whizzing out of it. Nobody applies the special clinical wazoo balms the wazoo doctor prescribed, but the poor wazoo didn't have the hands to rub into its own wazoo. But does the wazoo ever complain? No. Says more about you than it does the wazoo if you're askin' for my two pence, which you ain't. In this episode, Log gambles on amber, Steve admits he's been a weapons engineer for an aerospace contractor this entire time, and Gav addresses some early complaints about Regular Features Honey. Available here! https://regularfeatures.com/shop/honey-by-regular-features/

    497: Buy Our Honey

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2022 67:19

    Guess what, we're pivoting to HONEY SALES now. That's right, Regular Features has produced a small batch of 100% organic honey with the help of a hive of bees in North London. Visit our shop at the link below to grab your jar of our special sticky reserve today, before they're all gone! https://regularfeatures.com/shop/honey-by-regular-features/ To celebrate our new venture, in this episode we take you behind the scenes on a tour of the very hive our honey got scraped out of. We can hardly believe it either.

    496: Hot Mum Curse Mountain

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2022 56:57

    You have some nerve showing your face around here after what you did. But since you're here, you might as well stay and listen. In this episode, Joe demystifies the British parliamentary process. Log helps out a mum in need. Steve got too hot in a heatwave.

    495: The Catfisher Becomes The Catfished

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 17, 2022 39:46

    Imagine YOU were the Hotstepper. How would YOU like it if you heard everyone saying "Here come the Hotstepper" every single time they saw you? "Look busy," whispers Daniel in Accounts Payable, shuffling urgently past HR with a folder clutched to his chest. "I just saw the Hotstepper getting out of the lift." You might be London's fanciest Hotstepper by night, but by day you're Martin Pickering, area manager for Bridlington Diagnostics. And you just want to DO YOUR JOB In this TECHNICAL DIFFICULTY PLAGUED EPISODE, Gav gets his likeness used and abused and it lands a little too close to home for comfort, and Log has news for you about Castles, Wasps, and Printers. With thanks to absolute unit MIke Orvis for The Bee-Witcher Jingle

    Log and Joe's Deleted Scenes Special

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 7, 2022 46:41

    This might sound like a special in which we include deleted scenes from past episodes of Regular Features, but it ISN'T. What it actually contains is Log and Joe joining forces for a never-before-seen twoboy episode in which they theme multiple micro-features along the theme of deleted scenes. We've got the Green Mile, we've got Se7en, we've got Big Yellow Taxi, we've got My Baby All-Gone, and we've got even more tenuous connections than that. And if you DARE suggest that this is being called a special because we hadn't properly counted how many episodes there were before the episode 500 live show, we will just kick right off, capisce?! Fig Leaf Rag Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ "Breaking News" Credit: https://www.FesliyanStudios.com Background Music

    494: 10 PRINT "Hello Son" 20 GOTO 10

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2022 47:58

    Some days you're the horse. Other days you're the horse's secret collection of amethysts he keeps under a big pile of hay in his stable. In this episode, Log tries to fill a printer-shaped hole in his soul with a laserjet. Matt springs a painterly pop-quiz on us. And Steve finds a way to reconcile with his dad. Let's go!

    493: The National Trust Guide to Fruity Same-Sex Smooches

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2022 44:37

    Chalk and cheese. You'd think they'd be disgusting together, but I'm eating some right now and it's absolutely delicious exchept forr hoaw it claggxx up mah mouuut. Aneewoy I shupposh iss tym to chell yoo abow thisz weekss epishold of Rehgyolnah Peeches. Shteef hash sheen duh Dishnee Pixaaaaaah moofie Laghtyeeah and ish dinsgustin!! Jhoh izz on tze hunnt fo a Wikinpeeedinah paych antd.... *spits* Log has visited a number of National Trust heritage sites. Time for another bite I think! HAAFFF A GRAY WEEEEENK!

    492: Laser Goblin

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 11, 2022 53:09

    Four score and Michael Barrymore. Sorry, that's all I've got. Thanks for reading this bit. In this episode, Gav looms over us like a ghost, Steve's got laser eye surgery, and Log's a mean little goblin with a mission to pang the queen, That's right, PANG! We love you.

    491: Lord of the Ringo Bingo

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 3, 2022 59:23

    How did you get in here? This is a supposed to be a private crematorium. You shouldn't be riding your penny farthing around the crematorium honking on that antique horn of yours. Watch out for that pile of unburnt cadavers! Oh no, you've knocked them all over and their toe tags got all mixed up – now we won't know which grieving widows get which urns. Look, we promise we won't tell on you for goofing around the crematorium if you don't tell the widows we're doling out rando-ashes. Deal? Deal! In this episode, Joe discovers another celebrity NFT grift. Steve's seen the new Lord of the Rings: Gollum game. And Log's been to Big London on a riverboat tour. GO!

    490: Emotional Wine Spice.wav

    Play Episode Listen Later May 27, 2022 47:31

    This week's episode of Regular Features is presented, as always, in high-quality .wav format. You make a .wav by walking up the holy mountain and holding your Zune to the sky. A single raindrop will fall into the 3.5mm headphone jack, and a .wav will be shat out. It's beautiful. This week's .wav is filled with a spicy, sexy episode of Star Trek, a look into the newest FIFA game on PS2, and a discussion of why you'd ever want to be in a bath full of Beelzebub's juice - wine.

    489: Orson Welles' Mucky Bins

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2022 49:42

    This week the fellas are joined by two very special guests Orson Welles and one other person whom I shall not be naming here lest I rob you of the excitement we all felt in the room when he showed up.

    488: Arcade Fires on a Rowboat

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2022 54:18

    This is episode 488, which in bingo calling is "two fat ladies, married for forty years and still profoundly in love, standing at an easel where the first fat lady is painting a simple watercolour of their pet cat (name of Biscuits) as the second fat lady watches her from behind. The first fat lady turns to her wife and says, 'my dear wife, these past few months I cannot help but feel we are growing apart, is something the matter?' To which her adoring wife smiles and eventually replies, 'no, my love, my sweetest love, it is just the default kerning makes it look that way, I am as in love with you now as I ever have been. I am one thousand times more in love with you today as I was when I first saw you. I cannot count the ways that I love you. It's got to be at least fifty, and that's just off the top of the bonce.' And THEN the first fat lady laughs and says, 'I knew you were, I can feel your love every day, my beautiful wife, you are my joy, my spark. Do you like this painting I have made?' Her wife pauses. 'Yeah of course, I mean, what is... yeah, wow, that's... a castle? With the... are those archers there along the top, oh that's just... crenellations. You're so good at painting. I've always... always said that. Anyway, I'm just going to pop out to Sainsbury's gorgeous, you want anything?" In this episode, Gav interviews Win Butlers of the Arcade Fires. Steve feeds waterfowl inappropriate foods. Thanks!

    487: Dunst's Dizzee Flippin' Rant

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 29, 2022 58:10

    Well aren't you just knee high to a horse, you lovely little thing. Let me give your hair a ruffle, oh you're ever so cu- YOU JUST BIT ME. Why did you bite me? I just came along to tell you what's in this week's episode of Regular Features and now I shall have to get a shot for some kind of muddy disease. Serves me right for trying to be nice. Well here's the low-down I SUPPOSE: Matt has had a crazy weekend fistbumping rappers and trying not to be bullied by children. Steve has his hands on a precious audio tape of some dirty words from a beloved childhood figure. Log invites his friend Kirsten Dunst along to show us her nine different accents. Joe is angry at an older man again, this time for believing in himself. Look! I'm bleeding! That was very rude of you.

    486: Golden Simpsons Ticket

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2022 36:41

    Well, there's nothing else for it, we'll simply have to do another episode of the Regular Features podcast IF IT SO SUITS THEIR HIGHNESS. In this one, Log fails to groom an heir to his publican throne, and Joe mourns the loss of the thing where the continuity guy talks about Hollyoaks over Danny Elfman music. Steve is here, as useless as ever, staring slackjawed into the sun like a statue. Love you!

    485: Tell Your Boss

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 16, 2022 43:37

    You've been very good today so here's a podcast we made just for you, as a reward. Also, hey, that thing you're feeling stressed about doesn't matter, you're doing great buddy. Keep it up! In this episode, Steve is drafted in as the lord of the dance, Log unearths some horny personal ads from 1992, and Joe is put off his entree by a doddery old racist on the next table. TELL YOUR BOSS.

    484: Celebrity Heaven (with Spiders)

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 3, 2022 39:55

    Steve ushers in a new period of respectfulness for the podcast, in which we deal with recent sad news in a fashion that cannot, surely, cause offence. Joe fearlessly takes on the biggest, most blistering incident to dominate the celebrosphere. Log sticks his tongue half out his mouth and talks about sucking off spiders, for the second time.

    483: Search for the Soreen Inside Yourself

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2022 43:03

    On this week's episode Joe, Log and Gav crack some of their famous 'wise' about malt loaf, heaven and bees. There's also some exciting news about The Regular Features Episode 500 Live Show!

    482: Regular Features - Origins

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2022 44:59

    Have you ever wanted to know how Regular Features' greatest stories came to be? Have you ever wondered how Grapesalicious gained her penchant for a piece of pink peppercorn? Or how Buck Pawchucker became mayor? What about how Gav surivived? Well, we answer NONE of these questions in this otherwise origin story-packed ordeal from Steve, Log, and Joe. Strap them lugholes into a helment - you're about to go back in time using only your freakin' ears.

    481: Banana Horoscopes Up the Wazoo

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 13, 2022 38:34

    Log, Matt and Gav get together to talk horoscopes or should we HORRORscopes??....no, actually horoscopes was correct. Sorry about that. There's also some stuff about a dog and I think Nish Kumar but I can't be sure.

    480: The Magic Convention Special feat. Topas

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 4, 2022 48:58

    Gavin and Joe infiltrated a world of alakazams by putting on cloaks and big hats and saying that they knew what a spell was, and now they present to you, the Regular Features reader, a special report on the Blackpool Magic Convention 2022. If, while you read this episode, your whole body falls off, don't be afraid - it's just magic. Kazoo Orchestra does Danse Macabre by Imaginary Kazoo Orchestra https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oj9yMUWjtyA

    479: And So To Bed

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 27, 2022 39:23

    Ohhhh big stretch. Regular Features is all snoozy and cosy in bed! It is so warm and nice under the Regular Features duvet, we could just stay here forever. Do you want to climb in with us? There's a space here just for you! Don't worry about that thing you've got to do, just wiggle your way in between us and have a big yawn and a nice rest. That's right. We'll blow you sweet little kisses while you drift off. There we are. In this episode, Steve's got all sleepy. Joe can levitate now. And Log conjures James Van Der Beek. Shhhh. Shhhh.

    478: Cowboy Cable Bunker Boys

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 19, 2022 37:09

    WAHP! WAHP! This is an emergency broadcast from the Regular Feautures emergency storm bunker. Hello. How are you? Oh that's nice. We're fine thanks, but unfortunately... it is a major emergency!! Storm Eunice has really churned our butter this week, if you'll pardon the phrase, forcing us to seek shelter in our specialised, reinforced podcasting hutch three hundred feet below sea level. In the panic to get inside, three of the boys tragically got left behind and/or tragically kicked in the shins so me and Log could get a head start, meaning it's just the two of us down here. We will not apologise. From our subterranean lair, Log brings you feaures of dreams and USB cables, while Steve brings you features of USB cables and cowboys. Be safe out there xxx

    477: Twilight Bognor Telephone

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 14, 2022 60:02

    Please accept this episode as a token of our friendship. If you collect ten tokens you unlock platinum level friendship which is the same as normal friendship except you are allowed to blow raspberries on our bellies while we giggle and cheep like baby birds. WHAT?! In this episode, Joe considers the romance of a milky twilight, Steve samples Bognor's emergent culinary scene, and Log blows open the gnarly depravity of 1970s telephone perversion as it pertains to kissing of the fannoy and bulbus. We'd best get on with it.

    476: Dr Oetker's Goose Goes To Butlins

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2022 47:03

    There's a legend around these parts, a legend about a kid who filled his belly button with bird seed and waited in the garden. "Any minute now", he thought, "a robin will land on my tummy and eat the seed out of my belly button!" But the Robin never came, because the boy kept rolling around and shouting and farting. His mother came out and said "you'll never catch a robin if you roll around, shouting and farting!" And the boy said "well I don't want a Robin then, Robins can suck it". And you know what? That little boy grew up to be the Dangerous Dogs Act 1991. Enjoy this episode of Regular Features, where a little crab with a secret teaches Sophie Ellis-Bextor the meaning of death, a goose gets looser than she's used to, and the full geometrical range of the Dr Oetker factory gets explored in thrilling detail! Musical credits: Onion Capers Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

    475: Baby Was Dump

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 30, 2022 46:18

    This week we've got all the basic elements you need to make a regular features: Uber. Baby. Vibraphone. Capeesh?

    474: Winnie The Poop

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 23, 2022 51:15

    Hello it's me, the grape stomping lady who fell out of a bucket of grapes in a viral video from 2007. In this episode of Regular Features, Winnie the Pooh falls into Log's public domain, and a falling log wins Joe's public acclaim (which is to say he saw a poop in a TV show and wondered what if all TV shows got a poop in their finale). I hope you enjoy the episode, Steve is in it too and he does a fart!! Love, Grape Stomping Lady from 2007

    473: Stephen Hendry's Piss Bunker

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2022 59:13

    The world is a strange place right now but one constant is that Stephen Hendry is stuck in his panic room. Does he still have the famous yips though? That is one thing we just cannot know. Be safe, Stephen.

    472: Samus Aran's Umpteenth Mince Pie

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 8, 2022 40:09

    From our screaming throats to your hungry ears, it's another episode of Regular Features, the only podcast that's got us in it. In this episode, Joe chronicles the greatest number you've never heard about unless you read the episode title. Steve unlocks an exciting new octave thanks to possible permanent scarring of the larynx. And Log rates and review every mince pie within a ten minute mince pie fuelled sprinting distance. Let's go, actually.

    471: Betty White is Dead.

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 31, 2021 38:38

    Betty White is dead. We don't talk about that in the podcast at all. I'm only putting this here cause it just happened and I was hoping that someone finds out she's dead by reading this. Imagine that. Imagine your grandkids asking you "Grandma...do yous remembers hows yous founds outs Betty Whites wass deads?" and you say "Yes, it was from a podcast description text written by an odd Welshman" and they'll laugh as they take you back to your space nursing home in their rocket car.

    470: Hello Is This A Elf

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2021 57:49

    Happy Crambleneir! In sihd shhue cramblrmhotj, Joem cmrma a visit vfrom "Secret Santana". Gav hoesgojs anfs an incident with a DDP courier. Amd Steve, well, he gocrob a charades qjid quid quiz caled charades. Thank you for all your support this year. We legit love you readers, and we wish you all the best for 2022. Let's do it. Let's crack it open. LOVE, REGULAR FEATURES X

    469: Zim's Big Bloranges, With Kevin the Virus

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 8, 2021 55:55

    If I had one guess, I'd guess you're stuck in a pipe. Look at you, all stuck in that pipe. I bet you want some grease, don't you? You little pipe rat! Little pipe rat want some grease. Well NO, no grease. Not until you've listened to Joe wonder about the etymology of Plemons. And certainly not until you've heard all of Matt's new names for Omicron. And maybe you get some grease after Zim returns to tell us about his latest big boy updates. You can have grease later. Stop wriggling. George Street Shuffle by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3800-george-street-shuffle License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Sinfonia Number 5 Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

    468: The British Kebab Awards Special

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 2, 2021 77:43

    A mere 5 weeks after the fact, it's finally here – a comprehensive run-down of everything that Gav and Joe got up to at our favouite awards ceremony, The Kebabbies. Marvel as we almost get turned away, gasp at Gav's reactions to those who don't share his political leanings, and turn off in horror as you realise the depths of Joe's betrayal. Steve and Log are here to guide your emotions throughout, except when we're all too pissed by the end. Please invite us back, British Kebab Awards, we love you.

    467: Not The Kebab Awards Episode But Still Good

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 27, 2021 52:23

    We're sorry, but this is not the hotly anticipated kebab awards episode. That's happening next week now. There was a small legal issue we had to iron out involving, well, a kebab, naturally, plus so much libel it would make a judge's powder wig whizz out of the courtroom window and fly back to the special bird house where the wig lives with his wig wife (also a wig), and the wig wife says "bad day at work honey?" and the wig says (all dejected like) "you wouldn't believe what I have to put up with in that courtroom, I swear to god." And the wig wife says reassuringly, "do you want to go on a picnic?" And the wig says (get this), "no, you go on ahead" (a head). What? Oh, in this one Log invents a rotating meatkind, Steve sells the podcast out from underneath us, and Joe gets reacquainted with an old spoon-bending friend. PLEASE enjoy it.

    466: Playground Sultan Splinter Cell

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2021 48:14

    Make no bones about it, it's episode 466 of the Regular Features podcast. Hey, you in the back there with the bones, what are you making? A diorama of the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand? Oh okay. You're definitely not making bones about this episode are you? No? Oh yes, we see the little motorcade of femurs now, and it's very clever how you've used a scapula to portray Gavrilo Princip. Wow, and this is your hobby is it? It's fascinating. We've just got to write this podcast description, but we'd love to talk to you more about your bone thing later. Maybe over a drink haha. Oh you do this with your girlfriend do you? That's cool, yeah yeah no that's cool she can come too. Anyway. Log unearths ancient Google Doc fan fiction. Matt is ambassador for playground slides. Steve blossoms into a fine young gentleman. Let's go!

    465: Squid Judge Nurse Squid

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 6, 2021 51:17

    Three men enter the arena. Three men leave. It's fine in the arena. Nothing bad happens. One man has an ache in his shoulder, but he had that before he went into the arena. He thinks he may have slept on it. Good arena! HEY. In this episode, Log hypnotises a nurse into doing a Fred Durst into her frilly blursts. Steve invites you to play for big Squid Game cash money. And Joe heads into the forest to dispense justice. We absolutely love you.

    464: Watch Out Behind You Superman, It's Scream!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 24, 2021 35:32

    In this episode, Log goes hands-on with Superman's newfound sexuality. Steve goes pants-off when his French horn lessons are interrupted by Scream himself. And Gav is open-mouthed as he brings us a thrilling update from the British Kebab Awards. Do you mind taking your shoes off when you're listening to the podcast? We've just hoovered.

    463: Squash My Riverdance Hacker

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 17, 2021 57:48

    Giddy up, bucko, because it's another episode of this freakin' thing we do. In this one, Steve's Discord account got hacked by spooks. Log is going to reclaim his rightful title of Lord-or-Lady of the Dance. And Joe debuts the latest instalment in the long running series of interactive sports experiences about squaaaangular momentum. What are you still doing here? Start getting it in your ears! Credit: "Epicness Cinematic Dramatic Trailer" by RomanSenykMusic

    462: The Big British Kebab Awards Preview Special

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 7, 2021 71:34

    As we have done every year for the last 9 years, Gav and Joe are sitting down for an extensive, exhaustive, extremely good talk through this year's British Kebab Awards. Who will win chef of the year? Why is there no garlic/chilli award? Will Alfred Molina endorse us? All of this and more in a very special episode of Regular Kebabs.

    461: Poison Wasp Mount

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 30, 2021 59:45

    As people who absolutely freakin' love magpies always say: one for joy, two for joy, three for joy, four for joy, five for joy, six for joy, seven for joy, eight for joy. Nine? Ah what the heck, that's for joy that is. Ten is also for joy, why not. And eleven to boot! Twelve... hmm, best not get greedy. But for joy. Teehee. Twelve is for joy too, just don't tell anyone. :) In this episode, Log petitions Nintendo to make him a rideable mount in the new Zelda. Steve is definitely not a bunch of wasps wearing a Steve-suit. And Joe finally succumbs to the poison coursing through his incredible body. Let's get this showboat on the rowboat.

    460: Sock Horror Flashback

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 21, 2021 39:21

    There's no time to waste. In this episode Joe concocts his very own VHS cassette horror anthology. Steve reports his very own fading feature memories. And Log purports his very own sock tipperies and trickories. Is that even what purports means? There's literally no time to google "define purports". I'm sorry, we really have to get on with this. Hey google, define purports. Oh wow, yeah okay that's not even almost the correct usage of the word.

    459: What If John Grant Curry

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 13, 2021 35:36

    What if you dragged a big wet carrier bag full of lukewarm biryani to a concert? What if you had a nice time at a spa? What if you watched yet another Marvel TV show in the hope that maybe this one, THIS one, might be good? Only Regular Features can answer all three questions at once in a big sexy booming voice to make your guts quiver. Oh boy, let's go.

    458: Richard Simmons' Melancholy Watch

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 2, 2021 62:18

    Get this reader on the table, we need to operate NOW! Nurse, pass me a syringe full of Matt forgetting if he's ever owned a watch. I'm going to make a two-inch incision and insert Joe griping about his comedy heroes being sad about death. WE'RE LOSING THEM. We're going to have to do it- Nurse, I understand your reservations but we have to no TIME. We're going to try an experimental technique which involves shoving Log talking about yoga directly into the reader's spinal chord. We lost them. This never gets easier. Time of death: whenever this podcast description ended. I'm going to get a pork pie. "Raving Energy (faster)" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

    457: Episode One Redux

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 29, 2021 53:18

    The three original feature boys return for a very special reunion episode, never to be repeated, just like that time The Beatles went up on the roof and refused to come down until Linda McCartney invented frozen vegan sausages. Matt revisits his thoughts on Torchwood. Log treats us to a high-defintion re-release of some half-remembered Steve-on-Matt canoodling. And Steve ensures we'll never have sponsorship for at least another ten years, by reprising the one good feature idea he ever had.

    456: Panic in the Discord

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 22, 2021 49:18

    This week Gav's been combing the Discord for #content - something which he swears he won't be doing again. Meanwhile Log's addresses a pretty nasty complaint we've had and Joe has been called up to jury duty or JOEry duty, if you will. Actually...no...it's jury duty. Sorry. Our mistake. If you'd like to join the Discord then get involved on Patreon: www.patreon.com/regularfeatures

    455: 10th Anniversary Special

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 15, 2021 57:50

    According to the big Regular Features egg-timer on the roof, it's been exactly ten years since we invented podcasting. To celebrate, we've given ourselves a facelift. The unparalleled Sonny Ross has created new podcast art. The Patreon has an exciting new tier. And as for us? Well, we're only speaking in Spanish from now on. Por favor... www.patreon.com/regularfeatures En este episodio, Gav intenta meternos en el Libro Guinness de los Récords Mundiales. Y Joe recibe la visita de un magnate de las media sociales enormo, MySpace. Por los próximos diez años!

    454: Staring Into The Fridge

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2021 40:35

    The snap of the magnet releasing its psychic grip, the brief peel of tacky rubber, the delighted squeak of the hinges, a rush of cold air, a waft of something green, the chemical tinge of a bad houmous, a row of eggs watches on. This is it baby, you've opened the fridge for a look. In this episode, Log opens his fridge for a look. Steve visits the optician. Matt does business with a young boy. Thank you! Hey guess what we've got a surprise for you soon. Hee hee hee. Do you ever read this bit? Hee hee hee. "Deep Relaxation" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

    453: Self-Isolating Muntjac Chair

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2021 54:34

    Did you know Kenny Rogers came up with the line "you've got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em" while he was doing his laundry, it's true ask anyone. Anyway! In this episode, Log gets imprisoned in his home by an NHS, Steve challenges the boys to a spelling contest, and Joe tries to flog an office chair. Thanks!

    452: Tuna Spank

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 23, 2021 49:36

    Here at Regular Features, we like to push boundaries. That's why we're the first podcast to ever discuss BDSM without giggling or being sick into the microphone. In this episode, Log talks about hardcore leather strap velcro kink sex, then Joe, apparently unaware of the theme, discusses tuna. Steve, god bless him, is just sort of... there? What a strange boy.

    451: Soil My Gigi Hadid

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 10, 2021 36:49

    Have you ever wondered how we learned how to do all of our incredible comedy accents? Well in this episode, we'll teach you how! Log is offering every reader a free taster of our five day accent school, which will turn YOU from a "croikey doikey wadda crocodile mister" into a "hey I slappa da calzone outta ya mouth if you don make-a de waltzer go faster, ayyyy wadda disappointing funfair". Joe makes Gigi and offer she can't Hadid. Steve tips soil into his Xbox. Let's do this, please!

    450: The Blimp Episode

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 3, 2021 59:12

    It's here. The blimp episode!

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