Helping Challenging Children

Did you know that in the US one child or teen is injured by gunfire every 32 minutes? Did you know that one child or teen is killed by gunfire every 2 hours and 36 minutes? This podcast is not about abolishing guns. It is about a major shift in safe storage and limited access to guns by children and teens. We need to do this to halt the rising death rate of our children and teens due to the easy availability of gun access.

Each year the number of children in foster care would be the same number as the population of Wyoming. While there are children leaving the system each year, at least as many are entering during the same time. Foster care in the US was formalized after WWII to care for children who needed a safe place to stay while their parents dealt with issues that made living together impossible for a time. While foster care has been helpful for some, there are many who have left the system with lifelong scars, physically and emotionally. This podcast will look at where foster care has been, where it is now, and where it needs to go for the future of these children.

Resilience has been defined as an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change. It has also been described as the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties, and toughness. According to the 2020 Cigna Resilience Index, 45% of children are high in resilience. That means that they have a combination of internal assets, family support, and community support to handle the stressors which they may encounter each day. But that means that over ½ of children are struggling. If we are to be a strong society, we need to understand the factors involved in resilience and how to provide the necessary supports for the majority of our children, which will also be supporting those who are higher in resilience. This podcast will look at what resilience entails and how we can be there for all of our children.

Why are kids called oppositional, but adults are called assertive? It all comes down to perspectives on who is holding their ground and what the issues are. Of course, not all children called oppositional or defiant are lucky enough to be seen as assertive as adults. Many are punished, ridiculed, and labeled in negative terms, including mental health terms such as ODD – Oppositional Defiant Disorder. They are at increased risks of developing anxiety, depression, conduct disorder, and as adults' substance use disorders and antisocial behaviors. This week my podcast will look at the factors which lead to the different outcomes. I will also ask you to consider how you approach these children and what resources are available for them and their families. We need to understand all the factors that lead to a stubborn, oppositional, and defiant child so we can help them become more resilient and adaptable.

One child in six lives in poverty. Most have experienced adverse childhood experiences. Together, these risk factors increase the likelihood of children developing obesity and then type 2 diabetes. This then leads to more chronic diseases and earlier death. In this podcast, I will discuss what needs to be done to help.

Over 3/4 of prisoners have literacy problems. 2/3 of children who are struggling with reading in 4th grade will end up in jail or on welfare when they grow up. Listen and see what can be done to correct this travesty.

Did you know that over 1/3 of our states still allow corporal punishment in public schools? Or that police as resource officers have been in our schools since the 1940s? But, as can be seen, these are not making a positive difference. Listen to find out what has happened over the centuries and what we need to do to change how our students are handled.

"Spare the rod and spoil the child" is a phrase that I have heard to justify the physical punishment of children. The reality is that physical punishment and verbal abuse don't create long-term improvements in the behavior of children. It is more likely to create long-term problems, including the development of extremists and dictators. Neither of these groups understands how to show respect to others, only control over them. There is a significant amount of research, which I share in this podcast, that points to the need to change how we raise children and how we treat each other. Please let me know what you think.

Parents say that they want their children to get along with others. They want them to share. But there is a growing resistance to schools providing education on social and emotional skills to students. Why is there resistance and how do we get these individuals and groups to understand what is important in teaching these skills? Check out this podcast to learn more about SEL or social & emotional learning.

Before COVID, school refusal occurred in 2-5% of all K-12 students. It has increased due to the anxiety triggered by the pandemic. Unfortunately, school refusal is often seen as a form of truancy, when in reality it is a problem of anxiety. Learn about the behaviors and symptoms of school refusal and how you can help these students.

How common is anxiety in children? What is the difference between manipulation or oppositional behavior and anxiety? How do I help my child with anxiety? Listen to this podcast to learn more about childhood anxiety and behaviors.

One parent in four has a low literacy level. This makes it difficult for them to be able to know what their child has, what the medications are for, and how to get ahold of the physician when the child is getting worse instead of better. It is not only a parent problem, however, since 54% of Americans between the ages of 16 and 74 read at less than a 6th-grade level, while brochures, forms, and other medical information is frequently written at a high school level. Check out the podcast to learn more about the issue and how to help.

February is Black History Month. It is a time to look at the achievements but also the continued issues facing Black Americans. Black infants die at about twice the rate of the national average. Black mothers die due to pregnancy complications compared to White mothers. This episode will focus on the unnecessary loss of lives of Black Mothers and their infants. Our nation has to provide the necessary services so that this segment of our population can thrive like the rest of us.

January is Trafficking Awareness month. 30% of all trafficking victims are children. Most of the rest were children who felt isolated, unloved, and may have been physically or emotionally abused or neglected. Do you know the facts about trafficking? Do you know how to prevent children and adolescents from becoming trafficking victims? Listen to this podcast to find out.

2/3's of children by the time they are 16 have experienced at least one trauma, which is part of adverse childhood experiences. Of these children, one in six will go on to develop PTSD. The podcast this week will look at the reality of how our childhood experiences will impact us for the rest of our lives, unless changes are made.

One child in every 44 is in the autism spectrum. That is 7 1/2 million children in the US. We need to make sure we are providing them with the services and supports that they need to become confident and competent adults

Approximately 10% of all children in the US are born prematurely. They are at a higher risk for physical problems but also for educational and social-emotional struggles. We need to do more to intervene, monitor, and support them in order for them to have the best chance for a productive adulthood.

Children and families are being stereotyped as money-hungry, drug abusers, and "hunters" who don't want to work. But the politician (s) who believe this aren't looking at the facts. Check out my latest podcast to learn more. And if you agree with me, how about sharing this podcast so that politicians learn about the consequences of their decisions or lack of support.

What is the most important thing you would like to have for Christmas? How about improved mental health for our children? The US Surgeon General just published his Protecting Youth Mental Health Advisory 2021. He is sounding the alarm about the worsening mental health of our youth, which was a public health concern even before COVID. Find out what he said and what we can do to help our youth.

Roughly one in four children ages birth to 5 years are in childcare. There are also a significant number of children from 6 to 12 in childcare for before and after school services. These children are cared for by workers who are there to support the health and well-being of our youth. But they are poorly paid and now are seeing increasing demands for professional development, ranging from certificates to college degrees, with no possibility of increased wages. Listen to this podcast to understand what is going on in this field and where your help is needed.

Is it concerning when children get headaches? What could be causing them? Can headaches make children and adolescents more challenging? Check out my latest podcast to find the answers to these questions.

It is estimated that the prevalence of LCHI (lifetime concussion head injuries) ranged from 3.6% to 7.0% for children ages 3–17 years and from 6.5% to 18.3% for adolescents 13–17 years. Concussions are the most common form of head injuries that children and adolescents get. And over 50% of concussions are due to sports. Learn more about the symptoms and long-term problems that can come from having even a "mild concussion."

A recent article from the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science noted that there are still problems with gender bias in the science, technology, engineering, and math fields. Why is it taking so long for females to be able to see their ability and achieve the successes in these fields as their male counterparts? Listen and find out.

Have you ever felt as if you should try to be more like someone else in order to be accepted? Children and adolescents of color feel like this a significant amount of the time, even if they don't verbalize it. But it does affect how they see themselves and ultimately in the choices they make in their lives. Listen to my podcast to learn more about this and the damage it can have on their self-image and their lives.

Parenting styles have similarities and differences across the country. This is due to the 100's of cultures that parents grew up in. Learn how these differences can help or hurt children.

Our children are experiencing many more adverse events than we did. Do you know what they are? Do you know the long-term effects of these experiences? Check out my latest podcast to learn more.

Why do we have boundaries? Are they needed, or do they create limitations? Check out my latest podcast to learn about school and community boundaries and their effect on children of color.

The American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, and the Children's Hospital Association have declared a state of emergency and we need your help. Listen to understand what is happening and how you can help.

Many people don't realize how common dyslexia is. They also don't really understand what it is. Some even think that people with dyslexia must not be very smart, since many don't do well as adults. But it is so much more than that. Listen to learn more.

The use of out-of-school suspension began as a method of reducing student misbehavior in the 1960s and has continued to be used since that time. Research has shown that instead of stopping bad behavior, it has only made it worse. We need to look at a different type of discipline if we want to help students.

One child in 38 in the US ends up being involved with the juvenile justice system. How does this occur? What can be done to prevent this? Listen and learn what is needed.

According to the most recent CDC surveys, 6.1% of children have been diagnosed with ADHD at some point. Historically, physicians have told parents that their children would outgrow the disorder and would not do well with ADHD medications at that time. This is now no longer believed with the latest longitudinal study finding that only one child in ten will be in remission as adults. There are problems for adults with ADHD due to old information and biases. Learn about them and what is needed to help adults who still struggle with ADHD. If you want to go deeper on topics related to helping challenging children, check out my membership podcast, Digging Deeper to Help Challenging Children . Current topics relate to foster care and building resilience in children. On October 1st, 2021 I will be uploading my podcast entitled Understanding Oppositional Defiant Children.

I am sure that you have seen all of the out-of-control adults in the news and on social media. We shake our heads, trying to understand how so many people have gotten so angry and disruptive. So if we are confused, what do you think children are thinking? Many are likely scared to see so many angry adults doing things which they themselves would get in trouble if they did it. So, how do explain to children about these adults? How do you help them develop strategies to cope with the fear that these actions trigger in children? I will be touching on resilience in children during this podcast, but just a little. I have uploaded a longer podcast on my member site, Digging Deeper podcast if you are interested in joining and learning more. If you are interested just go to the Store link at the top of the page, or if you are listening through your favorite podcast app, go to www.helpingchalleningchildren.online/store.

Research over the last couple of decades has revealed that many of the children who are labeled behavioral disordered are victims of trauma and abuse. They don't respond well to school interventions that focus on making them accountable for their behaviors through punishments. These students need to be recognized as struggling to keep it together and be provided with supports and skills training in social-emotional learning as well as self-regulation skills provided by compassionate adults.

Children trust that adults, be they parents, teachers, or others will have their backs. But what happens when the adult is toxic? And what can you do to help the child?

In Season 2, I will focus on the factors that can lead to children being more challenging. I will look at what we do now and the effect it has and challenge you to look for new answers. The first episode will focus on our foster care system.

We, as a society, are struggling. We have talked about civil rights since at least the Civil War. We quote the Declaration of Independence with Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness, but we put limits on who should be recipients of these rights. We show our biases and bigotry toward others not "like us." Where do biases and bigotry come from? We are not born with biases and bigotry which means that they are taught to us. Biases and bigotry develop in our limbic system where we have to decide to fight, flee, or freeze when we encounter something we don't know or understand. But, unlike animals, we have developed our brain further with the prefrontal lobe where reasoning and logic develop. But we have to take time to develop that part of our brain. We need others to teach us the path from the limbic system to the prefrontal lobe in order to increase our ability to tolerate and even come to embrace difference.Unfortunately, many children are not provided with the skills to develop their logic and reasoning. They are taught, instead, to fight or flee from "others" who don't match up as the same. This has to change if we are going to see true reform in our society. We need to add Matthew(22:37-39) to what we talk about with the Declaration of Independence as we work for a better world.

We, as a society, are struggling. We have talked about civil rights since at least the Civil War. We quote the Declaration of Independence with Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness, but we put limits on who should be recipients of these rights. We show our biases and bigotry toward others not "like us." Where do biases and bigotry come from? We are not born with biases and bigotry which means that they are taught to us. Biases and bigotry develop in our limbic system where we have to decide to fight, flee, or freeze when we encounter something we don't know or understand. But, unlike animals, we have developed our brain further with the prefrontal lobe where reasoning and logic develop. But we have to take time to develop that part of our brain. We need others to teach us the path from the limbic system to the prefrontal lobe in order to increase our ability to tolerate and even come to embrace difference.Unfortunately, many children are not provided with the skills to develop their logic and reasoning. They are taught, instead, to fight or flee from "others" who don't match up as the same. This has to change if we are going to see true reform in our society. We need to add Matthew(22:37-39) to what we talk about with the Declaration of Independence as we work for a better world.

This pandemic has shown that our country is greatly divided. What should be a situation where children see adults model care and compassion for their neighbors, has shown that there are a group of people who don't believe in that, but rather model how to push others around.We need to see if we are being good models of showing love, acceptance and respect to others now and in the future.

This pandemic has shown that our country is greatly divided. What should be a situation where children see adults model care and compassion for their neighbors, has shown that there are a group of people who don't believe in that, but rather model how to push others around.We need to see if we are being good models of showing love, acceptance and respect to others now and in the future.

We are not just struggling with an infectious disease right now. We also also struggling with women, who due to mental health disorders, could very well be drinking alcohol much more often and may also be pregnant. This means that we have a high risk of a surge in the number of babies born with a Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, which will impact their lives and all of society for decades to come.And there are also the individuals who currently have FASD and are struggling due to the significant changes in their lives, the isolation, and the problems they have due to their FASD.Listen and learn.

We are not just struggling with an infectious disease right now. We also also struggling with women, who due to mental health disorders, could very well be drinking alcohol much more often and may also be pregnant. This means that we have a high risk of a surge in the number of babies born with a Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, which will impact their lives and all of society for decades to come.And there are also the individuals who currently have FASD and are struggling due to the significant changes in their lives, the isolation, and the problems they have due to their FASD.Listen and learn.

Approximately 10% of children will be diagnosed with a learning disability over their lifetime. Learning disorders are considered neurodevelopmental disorders, which means that they are part of the child's wiring at birth. But that doesn't mean that we can't help develop skills even before they show signs. The more we expose children from birth to 5 years of age to language, sounds, books, and hands' on activities, the more their brains learn to process what their senses are experiencing, which will then lay the foundation for academic learning.

Approximately 10% of children will be diagnosed with a learning disability over their lifetime. Learning disorders are considered neurodevelopmental disorders, which means that they are part of the child's wiring at birth. But that doesn't mean that we can't help develop skills even before they show signs. The more we expose children from birth to 5 years of age to language, sounds, books, and hands' on activities, the more their brains learn to process what their senses are experiencing, which will then lay the foundation for academic learning.

There has been a great deal of talk about how this pandemic is affecting the mental health of those who already struggle with mental health disorders. But it is and will have effects on our children, who don't have the developed frontal and prefrontal lobes to logically process the situation and make future plans. They need us for this. But how are we doing?Listen to this episode and think about what signs of long term stress which can make you more vulnerable are also being seeing in kids. Let's work to keep the number who develop PTSD down as low as possible.

There has been a great deal of talk about how this pandemic is affecting the mental health of those who already struggle with mental health disorders. But it is and will have effects on our children, who don't have the developed frontal and prefrontal lobes to logically process the situation and make future plans. They need us for this. But how are we doing?Listen to this episode and think about what signs of long term stress which can make you more vulnerable are also being seeing in kids. Let's work to keep the number who develop PTSD down as low as possible.

Before the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act there was the Education for All Handicapped Children Act (EHA) from 1975 to 1990. This was enacted while I was in college, which is why I never really had exposure to students with disabilities, especially Down's Syndrome. I have spent my career working with students with all abilities and difficulties but have felt more of a need to advocate for children with Down's Syndrome because they are an endangered segment of our society. Even today there is a push internationally for abortion if a mother is carrying a fetus found to have Trisomy 21. I want to take a moment to celebrate all the achievements these children have given us. Let's not continue to discriminate against them from inception onward, but work to help them show us all that they have to offer. And they have a great deal to offer.

Before the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act there was the Education for All Handicapped Children Act (EHA) from 1975 to 1990. This was enacted while I was in college, which is why I never really had exposure to students with disabilities, especially Down's Syndrome. I have spent my career working with students with all abilities and difficulties but have felt more of a need to advocate for children with Down's Syndrome because they are an endangered segment of our society. Even today there is a push internationally for abortion if a mother is carrying a fetus found to have Trisomy 21. I want to take a moment to celebrate all the achievements these children have given us. Let's not continue to discriminate against them from inception onward, but work to help them show us all that they have to offer. And they have a great deal to offer.

These are scary times for all of us. We are unsure of our economic future and our physical and mental health due to the pandemic. As adults we are struggling to remain calm, to use logic to counter the fears that run rampant through our minds.Our children are also struggling, and are many times more fearful because they don't have the maturity of our brains and the experiences where things have gone wrong but later got back to normal, or a new normal. They reach out to us to provide the sense of safety that we will all get through this.But some of what they need is physical contact, hugs, snuggles, a loving touch, sharing your bed at night, which is the scariest time of all. We need to be here for them, and realize that if we have been practicing physical distancing from others we and our kids can safely get physically closer. That sharing of physical closeness can help us all, so don't be afraid to share with your kids.

These are scary times for all of us. We are unsure of our economic future and our physical and mental health due to the pandemic. As adults we are struggling to remain calm, to use logic to counter the fears that run rampant through our minds.Our children are also struggling, and are many times more fearful because they don't have the maturity of our brains and the experiences where things have gone wrong but later got back to normal, or a new normal. They reach out to us to provide the sense of safety that we will all get through this.But some of what they need is physical contact, hugs, snuggles, a loving touch, sharing your bed at night, which is the scariest time of all. We need to be here for them, and realize that if we have been practicing physical distancing from others we and our kids can safely get physically closer. That sharing of physical closeness can help us all, so don't be afraid to share with your kids.

Right about now many families are getting very tired of being in close quarters with their children. Many things are getting on the parents nerves, especially actions which their children are doing which feel like intentional behavioral actions.But, this may be a good time to sit back and observe as a scientist would, to objectively watch as the child goes about his activities, or as you try to get him to do some school work. As your child works, do these behaviors begin to show up, despite your child looking like he is still focusing on the task at hand?Learn more about motor movement problems and tics, so that you can be supportive of your child if indeed you find that these motor movements are not intentional, but rather, neurologic.