The Divorced Girl Smiling Podcast

"I can't meet anyone." "There are no good guys out there." "I hate dating." These are things I hear from divorced women way too often! Well, listen to this episode and things might change! My guest is Dating after Divorce Coach, Laurie Gerber, who offers 5 ways to increase your chances of finding love.

Are you feeling panicked or anxious or fearful during your divorce? If so, we understand, and this is a great episode for you. Divorce can feel chaotic, but my guest, Lisa Schnitzer, a professional divorce concierge, can help take the panic, fear and anxiety out of your life by helping you get organized and restore control. In this episode, we offer tips to get started.

What is a holistic divorce? Collaborative Divorce Attorney and Mediator, Rosemarie Ferrante explains in this episode, and we talk about the benefits of a holistic divorce and how it can increase your chances of having a good outcome and the best possible post-divorce life.

Change isn't easy, and it takes guts to take steps to change your life. Michèle Heffron is a life, love and relationships coach who is no stranger to change, and getting out of her comfort zone. We talk about why change is so scary, and how to not only cope, but to embrace it.

Coparenting is so important, yet anger, resentment and hurt feelings can make healthy coparenting so difficult. My guests in this episode are divorce mediators (and sisters!) Lizzie Stevenson and Martha Heywood. These wonderful women offer healthy coparenting tips that will help you put your children first.

One of the scariest parts about getting divorced is figuring out if you are gonig to stay in your home, and if so how you can financially make that work. There's also the decision of "Should I buy a new home or should I rent?" My guest in this episode is Rebecca Turley, Realtor, who offers her thoughts and so much wonderful advice. 

If you are living with or leaving an alcoholic, this is a great episode for you! My guest is Amber Hollingsworth, Licensed Drug and Addiction Counselor, who offers insight into what the addict is thinking and feeling, along with tips on getting the person to get help.

Do you know what the most important asset you have in divorce is? It's not your home or your car or your 401K, it's time. My guest in this episode is Hirsch Serman, a financial divorce coach and divorced dad, and this conversation is so inspiring, you're going to love it!

Dating after divorce can feel frustrating and disappointing. My guest in this episode actually wrote a book about some of her unbelievable dating stories and she shares them in this episode. This isn't all doom and gloom, though. It's lighthearted, funny, and meant to inspire you that from every date, you learn something.

"I never loved you," "You're going to regret divorcing me," "No one will ever want you." These are just some of the very cruel things people might say during divorce. My guest in this episode is Joanne Litman, Financial Advisor and divorced mom, and we discuss why people say these things and why if you hear "I never loved you," that's simply not true.

"Starting over after divorce at 50" is heavily searched in Google, and understandably so! It can feel scary to start over at an older age. My guest in this episode is Juli Walton, LCPC, and we talk about fresh starts, reinvention, and living your authentic life after 50. Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/how-to-move-on-after-divorce-in-your-fifties/

What does it mean to be emotionally savvy? My guest in this episode is Katherine E. Miller, Divorce Attorney and author of her new book "The Emotionally Savvy Divorce." Katherine shares some of the key takeaways in her wonderful divorce advice book, with the goal of helping you have the best divorce outcome. 

Most people think that if they are getting divorced, the first thing to do is call a divorce attorney. While divorce attorneys are definitely needed, my guest says there's someone you should call first: a divorce mediator. Michael Cohen, divorce mediator, explains why in this episode, and offers tips on achieving the best possible divorce outcome. Read Michael's article on this subject here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/why-every-couple-considering-divorce-should-talk-to-a-mediator-before-a-lawyer/

One of the most painful questions people ask after becoming separated is: How can I ever learn to trust again after being betrayed? My guest in this episode is Divorce Coach, Jenine Marie Powell, who address the question and offers advice on how to get to a place of peace, and move on to healthy relationships in the future.

Some states require a separation period before you can officially get divorced. North Carolina is one of those states and my guest is Divorce Attorney, Whitney Butcher, who talks about the law and offers advice on those thinking of separating or who are already separated. 

Getting divorced requires the couple to walk away with a parenting plan, which might sound comforting. But what happens when life changes and that parenting plan is no longer working? My guest in this episode is Divorce Mediator, Erik Feig. Erik and I give examples of life changes and how they might affect your parenting plan, as well as how to create a plan that can adapt. 

People going through a divorce often feel like they've lost their purpose in life. They just don't know what they are supposed to do now or who they are. My guest is Phil LaGiglia, and both Phil and I have been where you are. We talk about how to find that purpose again and the fact that life is going to be wonderful again. Read the article we wrote on this subject here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/lost-your-purpose-in-life-one-things-for-sure-its-wonderful/

It's very common for women getting divorced to feel scared and intimidated by having to now manage their own finances. My guest in this episode is Leah Hadley, Founder of Intentional Divorce Solutions, Mediator, and CDFA®, who addresses: fear of paying your own bills, understanding the stock marketing, planning for retirement and tax issues. This conversation will help you feel a lot better! 

Let's be honest. Financial fears might be the biggest fear for those getting divorced, especially if you've never managed your money. My guest in this episode is Financial Advisor, Pete Mullins, CDFA®, who offers tips to help ease your anxiety and empower you to feel confident when it comes to managing your own finances and making good financial decisions.

"I just want to get through the divorce," is a common statement people make. My guest in this episode is divorce coach, Mardi Winder, who explains that although we understand how you feel, that's just not enough. Mardi talks about strategies and mindset to set you up for the best possible post-divorce life. Read Mardi's article on this topic: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/2-things-that-matter-and-why-just-getting-through-a-divorce-is-not-good-enough/

Many people choose mediation as a way to get divorced in hopes that it will cost less, go fairly quickly, and result in a better coparenting relationship. My guest in this episode is divorce mediator, David Louis, who talks about some of the obstacles to effective communication that can hinder the mediation process. 

When people going through a divorce start thinking about custody and parenting time, things can feel stressful and scary. After all, we all want to spend time with our kids and be a part of big life decisions for them. My guest in this episode is Andrea Friedman, divorce attorney and partner at Friedman & Friedman. Andrea explains the differences between sole and joint custody, and talks about options in parenting time. 

"Life is a balancing act," says Amanda Campbell, my guest in this episode. You're a mom, you work, you have kids, you have family and friends, and trying to balance it all can feel overwhelming. Same with your financial life. Amanda Campbell is a financial advisor and offers advice on spending and saving in a smart way--in other words, balancing your financial wellbeing. Learn more here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/balance-mindfulness-and-money/

Splitting up assets in a divorce can get complicated, especially when there are retirement accounts involved. My guest in this episode is Divorce Attorney, Liz Felt Wakeman, who offers information and advice on making sure things are fair and equitable, and that you don't make mistakes that could cost you down the road. 

Can you mediate a high-net-worth divorce? My guest in this episode is high net-worth divorce mediator, Mara Linder, who says not only "can" you mediate a high-net-worth, high-asset divorce, but that there are many, many advantages to doing so. Mara explains the benefits of mediation, and offers tips to a better outcome and post-divorce life. 

Divorce is always difficult, but it gets even more challenging, both emotionally and practically, when you are living in another country, and/or you live in the U.S. but are from another country. My guest in this episode is Keren Asher, an Israeli based divorce attorney and worldwide divorce coach, who helps coach people all over the world if they are divorcing in a foreign country. Keren offers insight and tips into these situations, and also talks about divorce laws in Israel.

A huge part of the stress that goes with divorce is change. There are so many changes going on in divorce and for most people, it feels overwhelming. My guest in this episode is divorce attorney, Catherine Becker Good, who talks about some of the major changes in divorce. Catherine and I offer tips on coping with those changes. 

People often ask, "How can I be 'better' with money? My guest in this episode is money coach, Julia Shteynberg, who talks about how to reduce stress when it comes to money, and how to make good financial decisions during and after divorce. Read Julia's article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/how-to-be-better-with-money/

Two of the most prevalent emotions in a divorce are anxiety and fear. My guest is Divorce and decision coach, Karen Covy, who addresses these emotions and offers advice on how to cope. Read Karen's article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/fear-and-anxiety-why-they-show-up-so-much-in-divorce-and-what-you-can-do/

It's pretty common to have doubts and second thoughts about the divorce. But how do you know if your doubts are valid? Maybe you are considering reconciling. My guest in this episode is divorce attorney, Tiffany Hughes, who offers an explanation for why these thoughts occur, and a list of things she wishes every person going through a divorce knew. Read the article on this topic here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/having-doubts-about-the-divorce-here-is-what-you-need-to-know/

Co-parenting is hard. So, what do you do when you feel frustrated and angry and resentful towards your ex, but you still want what's best for your kids? My guest is Trina Nudson, who is the creator of her new app, BeAligned, which is a tool to help you vent, think through thoughts, and answer difficult questions. The goal: to help you be the best co-parent you can be, and to improve your quality of life! Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/co-parenting-is-hard-weve-got-you-covered/

Wondering if your spouse is cheating? My guests in this episode are Anthony DeLorenzo and Tony DeLorenzo, who are private investigators. These two are wonderful in offering signs your spouse is cheating, what to do if you find out he/she is cheating, when to hire a private investigator, and how to cope with the news. Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/is-my-husband-cheating-on-me-what-a-private-investigator-wants-you-to-know/

We do many episodes offering coparenting tips, but we've never done a show on custody tips for pets! My guest in this episode is Karis Nafte, dog and pet mediator, dog behavior specialist, author and speaker, who gives tips on what to do when it comes to figuring out "who keeps the dog" (which is the name of her company!) Read the article: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/do-you-have-a-pet-custody-agreement-tips-for-divorcing-parents/

Loneliness is one of the most painful emotions someone can feel. Whether you are lonely and still married, or lonely and going through a divorce, or lonely after divorce, my guest, Divorce Coach, Lisa Lisser is here to help. Lisa offers 3 practices to help you transform your loneliness into emotions that are healthy and hopeful! Read the article on this subject here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/3-practices-to-transform-divorce-loneliness/

Coparenting is difficult in any situation. But talking to your ex about the kids gets a whole lot more challenging if you have feelings of anger and hurt. How are you supposed to have a conversation and pretend like you don't want to explode to the person who has hurt you so deeply? My guest in this episode is Colleen Breems, divorce attorney and partner at Beermann. Colleen offers practical tips for those who are hurting and trying to coparent. Learn more here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/5-tips-for-coparenting-with-someone-who-hurt-you/

Taking accountability isn't easy for a lot of people. But if you are someone who is self-aware, there is a healthy way to take accountability versus having toxic guilt. My guest in this episode is Dr. Ginny Wright, Discernment Counselor Master Practitioner, who explains the difference between these two, and offers advice for those wanting to grieve their divorce in a healthy way and move on. Read Ginny's article on this subject: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/toxic-guilt-versus-healthy-accountability-in-divorce/

Hurt, pain, and anger are emotions that can cause a divorcing spouse to disengage and just stop talking to you. Receiving the silent treatment can not only feel hurtful, but it can slow the divorce process, and hinder good co-parenting arrangements. My guests in this episode are Catherine Shanahan, CDFA® and Karen Chellew, Co-founders of the well-known divorce preparation platform, My Divorce Solution. These amazing women (who both went through a divorce) explain reasons the silent treatment can happen and what you can do to cope. Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/my-ex-wont-talk-to-me-makes-co-parenting-pretty-darn-difficult/

When people are first separated, many tend to say things like, "We are going to do this amicably" and "We are going to figure this out together." In other words, they have the best intentions. But as my guest explains, a lack of education can really derail things. My guest is Kimberly Miller, Co-Founder of her divorce education platform, PartWise, and she tells the story of a couple whose divorce conflict escalated quickly because they didn't know the facts. Learn more here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/the-kitchen-table-divorce-that-failed-from-lack-of-education/

Theresa Viera and her mom are victims and survivors of domestic violence. Theresa, now a successful divorce attorney, tells her devastating story of growing up in a household of domestic violence and how she and her mom escaped and thrived. Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/a-story-of-domestic-violence-written-by-a-mom-and-survivor/

There are so many changes that go with getting divorced, and that can cause fear and anxiety. My guest in this episode is Women's Empowerment Coach, Shannon McGorry, who explains how change can affect you in a divorce. Shannon and I also offer tips on not only coping with change, but truly learning how to become empowered. Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/fear-of-change-during-divorce-reclaiming-your-power/

Divorce anger and resentment is understandable and unavoidable. But if not managed in the right way, these things can have a big negative impact on your kids. Conflict truly can hurt them, not just during the divorce but for a lifetime. My guest in this episode is Erica Speraw, Divorce Attorney and Peacemaker, who talks about the impact, and also offers tips on reducing it. 

If you are a women in your fifties, you will LOVE this episode! My guest is Michèle Heffron, Life Love and Divorce Coach, and Michèle interviewed dozens of women in this age bracket to find out what they had to say about life. The information is revealed in this episode, and Michèle and I give our two cents, as we are both women over 55! Read the article here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/women-over-55-speak-what-were-carrying-what-we-fear-and-what-were-finally-ready-to-claim/

So many people getting divorced see the process as a power struggle, and look at it as winning or losing. My guest in this episode is high-conflict divorce coach, Cherie Morris, who tells us why divorce doesn't have to be this way, and how you can be genuinely effective coparents while still getting what you want in the divorce. Learn more here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/dont-blow-it-in-mediation-how-to-step-out-of-the-power-struggle-and-into-a-better-future/

So many divorcing couples have the best intentions of an amicable divorce. But then, something happens and the divorce goes off-track. Suddenly, the "good" divorce becomes very rocky. To talk about this is my guest, Fabianna Laby, a clinical psychologist, who offers the 6 stations of divorce and how they can play a role in why this happens. Read the article: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/why-even-a-good-divorce-can-suddenly-go-off-track/

When I was first separated, I knew nothing about mediation, only what I heard. Some of it was true, and some of it wasn't. My guest in this episode is divorce mediator, Ellen Feldman, who shares some myths and truths about divorce mediation. Learn more: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/truths-and-myths-about-mediation/

The divorce process can feel overwhelming, and the last thing you might be thinking about is your will and estate plan. But my guest, Raquel Lazar-Paley offers some important advice about why you should engage in estate planning during your divorce. And, it's not that complicated. It's just VERY necessary! Learn more here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/divorce-means-a-new-will-and-trust/

Child support conversations with an ex can feel awkward, and there is a lot of emotion around this topic. The person paying might feel resentful about having to pay, or they might have a lot of fear and anxiety about finances in regards to support. My guest in this episode is Ron Platt, co-Founder of the NASDF (National Association for Single and Divorced Families) and Ron and I talk about child support, why issues arise and your options when it comes to easing your mind and feeling secure. 

If you've never been through a divorce, you are in new territory. That's why it's normal and understandable that you might make mistakes. My guest in this episode is divorce attorney, Sandra Fava, who addresses common mistakes she sees people make in divorce. We then talk about how NOT to make them. 

The holidays are supposed to be heartwarming and joyous. But what happens when a family member is suffering from alcohol abuse? The situation can turn the holidays into stress and anxiety. My guest in this episode is Laura Crossett, CADC and outreach manager for Soberlink, and we offer tips on navigating the holidays, whether you have an alcohol issue or your spouse or soon-to-be ex does. Learn more here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/navigating-alcohol-recovery-and-family-stress-during-the-holidays/

If you are going through a divorce, you might be headed to court, and a friend might say, "Good luck! I hope you win!" Or, maybe your lawyer says to you, "We won! The judge ruled in our favor." While it seems like that's what winning means, it really isn't, according to my guest. My guest is divorce coach, Kristen Noel, who talks about how to really win in your divorce. It looks a lot different than you might thing (in a good way!) 

People often say "Kids are resilient," and while that's true, they worry so much when parents argue, and of course, when their parents get divorced. My guest in this episode is New Orleans based divorce attorney, Zara Zeringue, who talks about some of the things kids worry about and how to address their concerns. Read Zara's article on this subject here: https://www.divorcedgirlsmiling.com/divorce-kids-and-what-theyre-worried-about/