We Could Have Been Astronauts

The Astronauts get a little boozy. Alex serves out more positive life advice while railing on loud music blasting from cars. Melissa listens and learns and offers lodging for Floridian Expats.

The Astronauts change their names. Melissa starts a new app, and Alex gives the listeners an air quality check.  Join the Astronaut on their We Could Have Been Astronauts Facebook Group. We don't post much and when we do….it's crap.

The Astronauts chat about Chat GPT. Alex goes on a listener shout out rampage and Melissa still backs up her Neil Diamond fandom. Remember to join the Astronauts on their ill managed Facebook Group, We Could Have Been Astronauts, and tell us the worst thing you've ever smelled.

The Astronauts try to pronounce the name of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson's Tequila. Melissa begs Alex to watch Ghostbusters, while ABish finally nails a coherent analogy

The Astronauts finally weigh in on the Super Bowl Half Time Show (we know, you've been waiting). Alex has sleep troubles and Melissa gets felt up @ a farm show. 

Surprise, the Astronauts are back! Melissa feels very much like a Tombstone pizza while Alex sort of embraces his Guatemalan Heritage.  Feel free to join us on the We Could Have Been Astronauts Facebook Group (It's the only social media we can figure out).

The Astronauts are available for all your advertising needs. Melissa survives the COVIDS and Alex gets a Tarot reading.

The Astronauts discuss bagels and the masterful food workers who serve them. Alex eulogizes himself as his liver takes a leave and Melissa looks into unorthodox healthcare providers.

The Astronauts have a lot going on in this episode from surfing to militias. Melissa can now do all the drugs and Alex assures the olds that it's ok to not understand TikTok Influencers.

The Astronauts talk guns in America. Alex lets us know his insecurities and Melissa isn't sure she would die for a Cheeze-It.

The Astronauts talk real estate in people heads. Melissa is called out by a man in a Home Goods parking lot, and Alex talks of his time in the Celebrity Gossip scene.

The Astronauts discuss Flemish giant Rabbit ownership. Melissa adheres to strict old person stroll etiquette and Alex gives ideas on how to survive a mass shooting. 

The Astronauts talk about the heavy shit of the day with a bit of laughter and naughty language. Also, Melissa takes her shenanigans to Atlantic City and Alex has a lot to say that is “interesting”.

ASTRO EXTRAS: Melissa misses a historical nip slip while Alex faces his mortality thanks to shellfish.

The Astronauts are back after Melissa finally starts to edit shows again. Alex insists on talking about “The Slap”, and Melissa worries that Alex won't be able to carry out her final wished due to his health issues.

The Astronauts show their love for Dick Butkus & Mike Ditka . Melissa gets into an altercation and Alex doesn't know if Charles Martin is his friend or stalker.

The Astronauts talk about the illusive critical race theory. Melissa has a plan to take out Putin if she has to and Alex has more breaking news complete with hot takes from Stanley McGregor. Oh and of course they have to talk about the NFL's QB Shuffle. 

The Astronauts are still in awe of World War 3.  Melissa looks up shirtless Putin photos and Alex has questionable run-ins with a local celebrity.

The Astronauts talk WW3. Alex reports breaking news and directs us to the best badass Ukrainian videos. Melissa then asks Alex to grant her a dying wish and he quickly turns her down. Need more Astronauts fun? Join us on our We Could Have Been Astronauts Facebook Group. We need friends during this turbulent time.  

The Astronauts both ignore possible dead people in cars. Melissa shares her favorite after surgery treat and Alex feels like he is now a cat person.

The Astronauts have the worst Super Bowl predictions. Melissa just has to see Michael Jackson's belly button and Alex starts another new religion based upon a little known biblical figure.

The Astronauts want their own national month of recognition. Melissa dips into the shady world of Adult Bingo and Alex wonders if he's allowed to think 18 year old girls are pretty.

The Astronauts investigate NFL QB's Girlfriends. Melissa learns not to drink urine to cure the common COVID and Alex gives out amazing tips to land a job.  

The Astronauts talk dentist etiquette and toothbrush colors. Melissa may not be as German as she thought and Alex comes in hot with advice that maybe shouldn't be followed.

The Astronauts want you to let your lamp light shine on their Facebook Page. Melissa makes more resolutions that may or may not include murdering Dace Russell and Alex gives us a peak into how he would  handle the I-95 pileup. Also, shout out to our sole listener in Hesse Germany. 

The Astronauts pour a 40 for Betty. Alex finds the most shocking story on Reddit, while Melissa starts the year off with a good cry over a questionable sports figure.

The Astronauts decide to take all of their health care advice from Terry Bradshaw. Melissa is still waiting to be embraced by the Lamp Lovers Community and Alex has a problem with the ‘TH” at the end of the word Meth.

The Astronauts continue a Christmas Tradition. Alex phones in from the Netherlands and Melissa finds a new group of people who share her passion. Merry Holidays Everyone!

The Astronauts cover a lot of ground in this episode from Target Bags to Astroworld. Melissa dishes her tips on using FB Market Place and Alex takes a life lesson from Taylor Swift.

The Astronauts are plagued with technical difficulty and had to turn in a short show. Melissa starts her 41st year and Alex favors her with his horn impressions.  We will work on figuring out how technology and the internets work. Stand by and know we love you.

The Astronauts wonder if you really can kill someone with a pillow. Alex wishes everyone would raise their standards and Melissa knows Stella got her groove back.

The Astronauts learn about mortal sins. Melissa has good reason not to carve pumpkins this year, and Alex takes all the credit for the worldwide success of Squid Games

The Astronauts talk death at a Phish show. Melissa kind of makes a friend/stalker and Alex flaunts his free Frosty Card because he's adopted.

The Astronauts talk Facebook Whistleblower. Melissa is done with Cancel Culture and Alex wonders how to get rid of Social Media.  

The Astronauts single handedly boost streaming numbers for Bruce Hornsby and Tupac. Melissa learns she can't count on Alex as backup in a bar fight and listeners finally learn the one word Alex wants censored.  

The Astronauts find out if 911 can trace you if calling from a cellphone. Melissa prays for Terry Bradshaw to be on Cameo and Alex is either having multiple strokes or is just super human.

ASTRO EXTRA: The Astronauts have a tight 3 minutes on Super Girl.  Melissa tells tales of Willy the Meth Dealer and Alex nails his Fantasy Football team name.

The Astronauts wax nostalgic for Big Johnson T-Shirts. Melissa uncovers a Fast & Furious conspiracy that chills the soul, and Alex records his Covid Care plan on the show so it will be admissible in most Alaskan courts. 

The Astronauts learn that most of the Night Court cast is dead. Melissa gets excited about being back in style every 10 years and Alex still holds out hope in humanity to turn around the entire world.

The Astronauts deal with the fallout from the Phish show. Melissa is trying to decide what to be for Halloween and Alex sings the praises of female drug dealers.

The Astronauts' favorite cats return. Melissa learns that 4pm is Alex's witching hour.  Alex lets the listeners know why he never lies or has explosive diarrhea.

ASTRO EXTRA: The Astronauts wait to be cancelled. Melissa questions Alex's citizenship while Alex continues to sign legal documents with this enemies' blood.

The Astronauts deliver a very special episode for Alex's Birthday.  Melissa discovers Funko Pops and Alex celebrates Uncles named Jerry.

The Astronauts delve into top stories of the day and why they don't matter. Melissa continues storm chasing while Alex mixes alcohol and meds while on a tequila tear.  

The Astronauts have some old man heat wave talk coming your way. Melissa keeps going to funerals and Alex has an aversion to parking lots.

The Astronauts listen to cicadas while earning their explicit label. Melissa has theories on Hollywood “suicides”, and Alex fears ticks, mosquitos and cyber attacks.

The Astronauts wonder who is the most beloved on the show. Melissa's brain melts when she learns the cast of Eurotrip. Alex changes his name once again and praises the work of one Dave Matthews.

ASTRO EXTRA: The Astronauts really have no thoughts on John Mayer.  We learn Melissa may have grown up in a Dickens Novel and Alex realizes the moment he learned he was adopted.

The Astronauts do a deep dive on the Quaid Dynasty. Melissa goes in search of hard pickle seltzer and Alex pinpoints the exact moment when drugs will finally destroy his brain.

The Astronauts send their love to their fans in India. Melissa can’t handle self-checkout lines and Alex wants America to only have 50 states as he redraws state boundaries.