Cage's Kiss

We're back, behbeeee! We're celebrating Nicolas Cage's birthday with his 2021 film, 'Pig'.Linda discusses how this movie surprised her in a wonderful why and sings a ruined version of a beloved song that will ruin it for you forever; Donnie discusses his time in the food industry and shares a bit of his frustrations with Cage's prep cooking; and Adrian shares the box office performance and (as always) has a brilliant sequel idea.Remember: 'You don't have to care' and 'F*ck Seattle.'

Don’t miss Donnie's one-man rendition of Les Miserables and Adrian’s solo performance. Donnie and Linda recommend loving the Willy, but Adrian finds no wonder in this Wonderland. Spoilers ahead.

This week, the CHUDs are talking about the last 2 episodes in Netflix's 'History of Swear Words', covering the words 'p*ssy' and 'damn'. Mostly, they go off on tangents and we find out why Linda and Donnie are so fuggin weird (Hint: it's another cousin story).

Listen to this bitch put up with these 2 dicks. This week, we’ve got Big Nic Energy! Also, we become dick wizards. We’re covering the History of Swear Words, episodes 3 and 4, ‘Bitch’ and ‘Dick’.We feel that the new Netflix show doesn’t properly cover the actual history of swear words, so we give a shout-out to our friends who do a great job covering the history of words and phrases - Origin of Speakcies.

Linda and Adrian toss some sugar and honey into Donnie's Ice tea, just before we poo out our episode and explore the majestic decency of the F word. Floccinaucinihilipilification

We’re celebrating Cagemas Day (our sweet baby boi’s birthday) and our 100th episode! Less exciting, we watched The Croods: A New Age. Donnie and Linda found it entertaining (though, not without its problems) while Adrian (as expected) hated everything about it.Join us as we discuss the movie and take a moment to thank some patrons and friends.

In this episode, we’re talking about the comic book Nicolas Cage and his son Weston created with the help of Mike Carey, ‘Voodoo Child’. It answers the question What happens when you cross ‘Spawn’ and 'The Crow’ and take away anything interesting?!Plus, we get to find out why Adrian is no longer allowed in family restaurants, Donnie gives us a spoiler for ‘Glass,’ and we share our new segment ‘Burger King or Hell?’

Hey there, CHUDs! We realized that we covered The Croods before we started our Sequel Return More Harder segment. So, this week we’re discussing our (probably very accurate) predictions for what we should expect to see in The Croods 2: A New Age.Also, we discuss what we would like to see from Nicolas Cage in 2021 and we come up with a masterpiece starring Weston: ‘Druid Kommander.’ Finally, is it just me? Or was Cage putting the OI in FOIN in the trailers for ‘The History of Swear Words?’There are SO many trigger warnings for this episode, I can’t even begin. So sorry.

This week the gang goes through the fargate to witness mortal kombat with the aid of our guide and celebrity guest - the one-and-only Len Kabasinski! That’s right, we covered Nicolas Cage’s latest direct-to-streaming movie, Jiu Jitsu! We talk about real Jiu Jitsu (versus whatever this was) costuming choices and classic martial arts movies that were so much better; Linda shares some behind-the-scenes information; and Len imparts some great wisdom for all creative types.Check out his Patreon page: www.patreon.com/killerwolffilmsand our’s: www.patreon.com/CagesKiss

While Adrian is still MIA, Donnie and Linda covered the 2019 direct-to-streaming feature, ‘Grand Isle’ which features Kelsey Grammer as a low-falutin small-town investigator looking into a rash of missing (or murdered?!) teens, KaDee Strickland as a desperate wife, and Cage as your drunk uncle from down south (HUH HUH). At one point, Linda and Donnie say they didn’t realize it took place in the 80’s, to which Adrian complained that there’s an on-screen message saying, ‘1988,’ but this aint the big city! We can’t read!

Apologies for the sound quality and my coughing, but this may be our best episode to date! Donnie and I (Linda) are joined by Kiara Williams! We set out to just discuss Cage’s 2019 movie, ‘Primal,’ but we ended up fixing it and creating an amazing franchise of nightmare fuel! Also, Kiara was kind enough to teach us about Canadian culture in hopes to end the syrup wars.We left an extra bit at the end since the laughs didn't stop.Check out Kiara’s amazing YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs3VbL_OXrsjxqeWymuwK5g?disable_polymer=true

Don’t bother watching Kill Chain, we did it for you! Linda plotted out the beats of the movie like she was hunting a killer and Donnie and Adrian present ‘The Closer.’

Have you ever wished they had one of those old-fashioned ‘INDUSTRY!’ educational films where they show you the whole process from picking coco leaves to distribution of cocaine while also detailing the value per gram throughout the process? Sure! We all do! Luckily, there’s 'Running with the Devil.'We have our friend, Anthony, from Capes on the Couch join us to try to make sense of our lives after having seen this.

Linda has arisen from her grave to discuss ‘Color Out of Space’ and Steve from Speakcies shares his expert knowledge on the majestic Alpaca!Check it out to learn more about Richard Stanley, Joely Richardson, alpacas, and H.P. Lovecraft’s original story!

While Linda is still in a coma, the boys’ decide to recap Cage’s work from the 2010’s - of course, this means we’re almost caught up (EEK! What the hell are we going to do?! I don’t want to go! - Actually, don’t worry, we have a plan.)

With Linda in a coma, Adrian and Donnie answer the call of vengeance on our 90th episode. Seeking to settle a long standing score with Cage’s films.Stay tuned at the end for an ad for our buddies at Hush Hush Society!Linda in a coma - I know, I know, it’s very serious.

This week, we are joined by our amazing friends, Zach and Alex, from Chick Flix With Dicks to discuss ‘Pay the Ghost!’ Does the ghost get paid? Is the ghost just paying it forward? Is the ghost observing the law? Does the ghost practice equal opportunity? We seek out answers to the hard-hitting questions!

This week, Linda was sick and the boys from Gutting the Sacred Cow joined the Cage Boys for a sausage fest covering of The Runner! Listen in to hear the Kevins tear the face off right back to Face/Off and Linda's Face/Off for the wrong week. There will be gravy.

This week, we discuss both the released Lionsgate version ‘Dying of the Light’ and the director/writer’s version ‘Dark’, of Cage’s last film of 2014. The boys disrespect Anton Yelchin while Linda tries so very hard to save the pod from being cancelled. Tune in for behind the scenes info!Also, there’s a shoutout in there for our friends in The C Word: A Conspiracy Podcast.

No children to watch? No more wet towels ruining your party? Free clothes? Compass apps on your phone? This week, we’re talking about how awesome it is to be Left Behind!*No Kirk Camerons were harmed in the making of this episode.

In this episode (lucky number 69) we’re joined by our friend Mike from Quiet on the Set! We discuss the career tragedy that is Outcast! Learn more about the director and screenwriter, where to score cheap opium, and the best 80’s song to convert for action movies!Check out Mike’s podcast at https://podbay.fm/podcast/1481408306

Alright, you’re gonna want to skip watching the movie and just listen to this episode. Trust us on this one. Even the amazing Peter Stormare and Danny Glover cannot fix this movie. Oh, yeah! We keep forgetting Glover was in this! Also, a big shoutout to our listeners in Russia! We love you!

This week, the gang discusses why brothels shouldn’t have vicious man-chomping dogs and how damn cool Bruce Dern and Boone’s Farm are. Oh, also they discuss Joe.

This week, we cover a Cage movie that is actually based on a true story! More importantly, the movie has John Cusack being a serial killer and Vanessa Hudgens using the N-word! It’s The Frozen Ground!Stay tuned at the end for a promo for our friends from the podcast, Harpy Hour!

This week, we covered the other stone age family, The Croods. This was the first voice acting gig for Catherine Keener, Ryan Reynolds, and Clark Duke. Join us as we share some behind-the-scenes information, share some Nic Cage quotes and wisdom, educate on what is in the McDonald's Classic Bundle Box and where to find the best fast food taco! If you'd like to contribute your thoughts to our Would You Rather question this week, reach out to us on Twitter - @CagesKiss!

Hey, have you seen that movie where someone kidnaps a guy’s daughter and the guy must use his very specific skill set to save said daughter? Yeah! That’s the one! This is not it. This is Stolen.Listen at the end for a promo for Ocho Duro Parley Hour! https://linktr.ee/ODparlayhour

This week, we’re joined by two of our friends, Matt and Alex, from the podcast, 3 Hours Later! Donnie shares some interesting reviews, Adrian lays down another challenge to send us your worst videos/animation, and Linda shares some behind-the-scenes info and accidentally puts local super villain Rex Velvet in charge of directing her porno!

This week, we’re talking about Joel Schumacher’s documentary about shitting the bed and Nicole Kidman’s poor career choices: It’s Cage’s final movie of 2011 - Trespass.Promo for The Movie Cellar!

Was he seeking justice or just another paycheck? Was January Jones REALLY in this? Get the answers to these AND find out why Nicolas Cage was arrested in 2011.Featuring a promo for our friends at Super Media Bros!

This week, the gang’s talking about the dangers of Amber Heard and of driving angry. It features Nicolas Cage, William Fichtner, Billy Burke, and David Morse. It was written by Todd Farmer - the guy who wrote Jaxon X!!! So…how’d it go wrong? Or how’d it go so right? Listen in to find out.Stay tuned at the end for a promo from our friends at Talkin Shiz.Want to help out your favorite indie podcast? I mean us. Vote for us at https://podcastmagazine.com/hot50/ Send us a screenshot of you voting for us and we’ll give you a shout out on air! The same goes for Linda’s other podcast, Bedknobs and Broomflicks!

We are joined by Jane from Bedknobs and Broomflicks to discuss ‘Season of the Witch’ (or, as we prefer, ‘Wetch’. This movie is chock full of amazing British actors (including Robert Sheehan from Misfits and Umbrella Academy) who (for whatever reason) are forced to use an American accent. If you keep falling asleep through the movie, just listen to this episode and we’ll give you the run-down.

Do you remember that awesome part of Fantasia? You know, the animated film for which we all agreed to forget the racist parts? Well, they made a movie about it and it sucks. Join the gang as they discuss why.This week, we’re joined by Andy from Geek Salad! Stay tuned at the end for a promo from Demiworld!

This week, Donnie is busy dying while Linda, Adrian, and Christian from Nerds With Friends get busy discussing how the kindest fathers use low-velocity rounds when shooting you in the chest and share some advice when visiting San Francisco!Stay tuned for a promo from Demiworld at the end.

This week, we ask “are you a pleasure bot?” as we discuss Astro Boy! It’s based on the pioneering manga/anime and co-stars Freddy Highmore, Kristen Bell, Donald Sutherland, Eugene Levy, and David Allen Grier. So, how’d it go wrong?

This week, we’re joined by our buddies at Everything I Learned From Movies to tackle Verner Herzog’s Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. We discuss a Golden Girls version, Val Kilmer’s fine acting, and how Cage’s movies should have more reptiles.Shoutout for the incomparable Ernie the Dragon.

Join us this week as we discuss the family movie that should have been a porn, G-Force. Cage resurrects his character, Charlie Bodell from Peggy Sue Got Married to play Sprinkles the mole. More importantly, we introduced a new segment - Cage or Busey!Stay tuned at the end for a promo from 3 Spooked Girls!

Today, we’re joined by Kyle from the Triple G Podcast, looking into the future and seeing the Cagey disasters yet to come. This is Knowing. Join us as we discuss where they went wrong and how loose Adrian’s grandma is.

Surprise! It’s our birthday! It’s also Valentine’s Day! To celebrate, we have two special segments just for you, princess! Thanks for listening and being the best pod fans out there.If you’re new to the show, thanks for checking us out! No worries, this episode has no inside jokes.

A hitman goes to Bangkok, falls in love with a deaf mute woman, befriends and mentors a thief, and poisons an elephant. It’s not Bangkok Safe, it’s Bangkok Dangerous.Stay tuned at the end for a promo from Ransack History!

Ben Gates is back with a vengeance and a plan: To unearth the truth of the existence of Reptilians and that the Earth is flat. Join the crew and their special guest, Tom Kenworthy from Deddy Bones, as they discuss National Treasure: Book of Secrets.Deddy Bones: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-deddy-bones-show/id1475512633Promo for Drunk Dish - https://drunkdish.com/

In our special 50th episode, we have the awesome Kristin from Coffincast and a two-fer episode! We’re covering the Grindhouse trailer, Werewolf Women of the SS and the movie that’s (very) loosely based on a Philip K. Dick story, Next.I hope you like Alice Kim as much as we do! She’s in both of these!

The gang discusses the greatest movie in the Marvel cinematic universe: Ghost Rider! We talk about how amazing Sam Elliott, Eva Mendes, and Peter Fonda are and share some behind the scenes information. Stay tuned at the end for promos from the amazing shows What Should We Watch and Bring on the Weird.

This week, we’re bringing our honey back by sacrificing Donnie! Join us as we discuss the lessons of Wicker Man, our suggestions for Gallagher’s career, and how we would have improved this movie.Stay tuned at the end for a promo from the awesome podcast, Friends and Flayers!

Where were you when you first heard the Cage’s Kiss episode about World Trade Center? We’ll never forget.Stay tuned at the end for an awesome new promo from our friends at 3 Hours Later!Also, sorry.

A troubled young man is drawn to a mythical place called Midian where a variety of friendly ants are hiding from humanity. Meanwhile, a sadistic serial killer is looking for a patsy.

Must write a summary. Summary. I wonder what Hugh Grant is doing right now. Summary. I wish I had two Adrians. Summary. Stay tuned for a promo from our friend at Pop Pour Review and a very special piece from Donnie.

“When I first read the script, I wasn’t really sure I wanted to be this character, because I was afraid it would get in my head too much...” Nicolas Cage, talking about his role as Uri in Lord of War.Listen to this week’s episode, which could possibly be our most offensive. Donnie let Linda edit so…sorry about it.

This week, we’re talking about National Treasure. Join us as we discuss lemon parties, LaBeauf, and punching ghoulies in the shower!

Check out a little of what you've been missing by not becoming a Patreon Patron! Every month, we have a bonus episode, "One Degree of the Cage" for our Patrons. We do a deep dive into someone who has worked with Cage before and 2 of their best/most important roles. December was Patricia Arquette's turn.You can sponsor us for as little as $1 a month!https://www.patreon.com/CagesKiss

This week, Linda and Donnie are joined by the boys from Bottom of the Stream to discuss the only film Cage put out in 2003, Matchstick Men.Join us as we discuss how awesome Sam Rockwell and Alison Lohman are; Sir Ridley Scott’s giant ego, Alison Lohman’s tail, and dinosaurs getting high!

This week, the gang discussed one of Cage’s best films, Adaptation. They also discuss how he was snubbed for an Oscar, how awesome a blaxsploitation version would be, and Betty White going at it in the bathtub. You know, usual stuff. Stay tuned after the closing song for a little bonus.