Podcasts about Ernie

Eric Church enters The Steam Room to indulge Chuck's new interest in Country music, talk about his relationship with Michael Jordan, and explain why golf means so much to him. Mike Sielski joins to discuss his new book, “Magic in the Air”, share stories about the history of the slam dunk, and put the Chuckster on the spot about why he never participated in a Dunk contest. Ernie and Charles reveal their hidden talents, entertain a wild hypothetical about finger liquids, and, as always, wrap with ‘Good for the Soul' Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

durée : 00:59:17 - Irrésistible Inconnu - par : Nathalie Piolé - Quitter ses repères pour se lancer dans l'inconnu ? Voilà un bon programme pour ce soir. - réalisé par : Fabien Fleurat

Send JD a text message and be heard!No one cares!!! Poor @aaronrodgers12 having to pay on his own dime to go talk to the @nyjets brass.  Good riddance.  @companyadjace @paddy_bailey do you really want him on @steelers this upcoming #nfl season? He says he'll play for $10M.  He is going to try and hijack the #nfldraft next week.  @lambeaufield should be tropical next week.  #cfb got it right for faking injuries.  Timeout first, if you're out penalty.  Simple and succinct. @nico_iamaleava8 to @uclafootball welcome to @bigten it's not going to get any easier.  @nyrangers thank you #samrosen it's been a great run.  @artemiypanarin NDA.  Don't ask. Don't tell.  @thomaswdonovan @robparker1980 @kevdu_theman Paddy @doctor_midnite @call_me_tca_prez @donna.fender & @downtimetv @brianbarnaby & @nyquil_inthe_flesh what a catch by @cody_bellinger to get first career save for @fcruz_48 @yankees 4-3 over @kcroyals last night.  Ernie thinks @lakers are winning the title this year.  I want @timberwolves to shock the world.  @nyknicks should beat up @detroitpistons in #nbaplayoffs 5 or 6 games tops.  #sportstrivia at the finish.All sports. One podcast. (even hockey) PODCAST LINK ON ITUNES: http://bit.ly/JDTSPODCAST

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Send us a textIn this historic and wildly entertaining episode, Pete Fry sits down with the one and only Ernie “Punch” McLean—a two-time Memorial Cup champion, iconic junior hockey coach, and foundational figure in the creation of the Western Hockey League. From outsmarting referees with water bottles to putting a goon in net for a penalty shot, Punch shares his unfiltered, unbelievable, and hilarious behind-the-scenes stories from decades in the game.You'll hear:The wild “water bottle trick” that changed a playoff gameHow he hypnotized a rival fan to cheer for his teamThe time he went to jail after a playoff winHis near-death plane crash survival storyCoaching a young Wayne Gretzky at the first-ever World JuniorsHis secret to building winning teams and why he was the first to coach with four linesThis is hockey history told like you've never heard it before—with grit, heart, and a ton of laughs. Ernie Punch McLean is a true original, and this episode is a must-listen for anyone who loves the soul of the sport.

Celebrity gossip has always had a dark side. Those whispered tales of stars behaving badly, dying mysteriously, or hiding shocking secrets spread through Hollywood parties like wildfire, creating urban legends that live far longer than they deserve. Even in our hyper-connected age, these stories remain strangely persistent – because deep down, we want to believe.Kyle, Ben, and Alejandro gleefully dissect the wildest Hollywood myths you've definitely heard before. Remember when everyone swore Paul McCartney died in 1966 and was replaced by a lookalike named Billy Shears? The hosts untangle the bizarre web of "clues" fans claimed to find in Beatles album covers and songs played backward. Then there's the notorious Richard Gere gerbil rumor – a story so persistent it made its way into the movie "Scream" and prompted Barbara Walters herself to awkwardly address it during an interview.From Mr. Rogers' supposed secret life as a deadly military sniper to the enduring debate about Bert and Ernie's relationship status, we explore why these myths take hold and what they reveal about our culture. The team brings their trademark humor to these dark corners of entertainment history, finding the humanity and absurdity beneath stories that wouldn't die. Whether you're hearing these tales for the first time or fondly remember sharing them on your middle school playground, this episode will make you question what other "facts" you've accepted without evidence.Subscribe now and join our community of curious minds exploring entertainment's strangest corners. Leave a review to tell us your favorite Hollywood urban legend – we might feature it in a future episode!Send us a message!Wicked WanderingsDelve into the enigmatic realms of the mysterious, unearth tales of haunting...Listen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifySupport the showDeath in Entertainment is hosted by Kyle Ploof, Alejandro Dowling and Ben Kissel.New episodes every week!https://linktr.ee/deathinentertainment

"He that ruleth over men must be just, ruling in the fear of God." - 2 Samuel 23:3 This Scripture describes this week's podcast guest extremely well. Very few people in state government, or in government anywhere, have such a fine-tuned, biblically-rooted understanding of how the Word of God comes to bear on civilization. State Rep. Ernie Yarbrough joins Bryan Dawson this week to tell his story about how he came into politics, and then to share about some important legislation that he's introduced this session. A son of Alabama, Yarbrough grew up as a homeschooler and witnessed the unthinkable when his father was imprisoned for refusing to pay taxes because those tax dollars were assisting in the murder of innocent children in the womb. He also saw friends put in prison for homeschooling back in the '80s. These things shaped Yarbrough, leaving an indelible mark in his mind and heart that drove him into the political arena. Yarbrough has dropped several good bills this legislative session, with the Laken Riley Act the most likely to pass. This legislation will work and partner with U.S. Sen. Katie Britt's similarly named legislation at the federal level to give local law enforcement the jurisdiction and authority necessary to remove illegal aliens from our community. Yarbrough has also introduced legislation—the Prenatal Equal Protection Act—seeking to give unborn children the same right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness that children out of the womb receive. He answers all the tough questions about this legislation, as it is a hot topic around the nation, while discussing other legislation he has introduced as well. This is an extremely informative and entertaining episode of 1819 News: The Podcast that you won't want to miss!

"He that ruleth over men must be just, ruling in the fear of God." - 2 Samuel 23:3 This Scripture describes this week's podcast guest extremely well. Very few people in state government, or in government anywhere, have such a fine-tuned, biblically-rooted understanding of how the Word of God comes to bear on civilization. State Rep. Ernie Yarbrough joins Bryan Dawson this week to tell his story about how he came into politics, and then to share about some important legislation that he's introduced this session. A son of Alabama, Yarbrough grew up as a homeschooler and witnessed the unthinkable when his father was imprisoned for refusing to pay taxes because those tax dollars were assisting in the murder of innocent children in the womb. He also saw friends put in prison for homeschooling back in the '80s. These things shaped Yarbrough, leaving an indelible mark in his mind and heart that drove him into the political arena. Yarbrough has dropped several good bills this legislative session, with the Laken Riley Act the most likely to pass. This legislation will work and partner with U.S. Sen. Katie Britt's similarly named legislation at the federal level to give local law enforcement the jurisdiction and authority necessary to remove illegal aliens from our community. Yarbrough has also introduced legislation—the Prenatal Equal Protection Act—seeking to give unborn children the same right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness that children out of the womb receive. He answers all the tough questions about this legislation, as it is a hot topic around the nation, while discussing other legislation he has introduced as well. This is an extremely informative and entertaining episode of 1819 News: The Podcast that you won't want to miss!

[A beautiful dog enters the palace; C'esme't is pleased—actually, more thrilled.] Now! (Yo!) [The Dog sits at the entrance.] Call to me. [he speaks from the mind (telepathically) with a familiar tonal voice] Come, sweet stranger! [The Dog approaches] For it is I, the King who walks as not a ghost For yet the call has spoken that I be your loyal shadow (it's me; the King. I've been called to watch over you) Then? (Elaborate.) For now I came as waked dost I as ghost and wandered, pity and pardoned by no army dared Aghast my throne And agape my eyes, Wide my mouth and nostrils, Disemboweled and yet, I did wake with my fortune And tidings in my kingdom, a hidden realm, For there slayed, as I wept, The others dared to swallow, This truth, I, as knight and pawn doth slay the Queen, For titled King no friend of mine; And now, this beast as blood dost froth, My mind does waste, but here I bark Fortunate! To be laid by as you, I will. Then, creature, as you may! For free, this I, And coming not the time I shall l awaken, And then, though, Does the true challenge to bear, The altar; the stone, the shield and the rope From which I pull, and thee shall fight. Marriage of souls. To fancy this beast, betrayeth not. For something barks as is an end As a man does call a lover friend And so lover-friend I am and shall be. Lol what the fuck. So he's a dog now. ‍♀️ wtf is going on in this show. Idk. I'm baked. Enter The Multiverse L E G E N D S: Manifest Destiny ‍♂️ Ascension: Enter the Multiverse The titles switched. Good idea. So maybe I should stick with t mobile? Idk. Mint mobile is 15 dollars a month for unlimited talk and text. HERE AND NOW I DECREE, THIS FEAST DOES NOURISH ALL OUR MINDS AND HEARTS TO FIGHT THE GOOD WAR AGAINST ALL HE WHO SQUANDER THE MERCY OF PEACE! TO COURAGE! lol you lost me. I'm grasping at strings here. I needs a means to an end I need a body bag, body bag I need a King and a dog And a cat and an owl And a mark and a dawn And a knife and a gun Call it what you want I was not at the rock But that's where I was going I'm lost in Omaha I was just on the dark With the dark and the walkers The king and the rabbit The facts and the stalkers But who sunk the boat? Who sunk the boat Now this is encouragement! Acknowledgements? Nothing yet. Disaster strikes obvious and No regrets But obvious I'm in it for the long run And it transpired for the job done But the waffles came out awful And crispier than I wanted Almost every time So I took the iron back to target And I know I came out with a double album in August But I got no promotions So I won't walk the carpet So I won't walk the carpet I know I know I'm no Joan Rivers Or Joan of ark so I won't talk the gossip I won't talk the gossip I won't talk the gossip Now, more followers Show boat, Throw him overboard into a rowboat With no paddles And horseshoes on em— That outta show ‘em Rondevouz Rob us all Noah's Ark Don't get so lost in the story Lost in the sory Lost in the LORNE MICHAELS …you caused this. [In a secret lab inside of 30 Rock, A group of SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE alumni are trapped inside a metal box; this room has no doors and no windows and seems to be amplifying thought frequencies each of them hears uniquely, but distinctly, and very, very loudly. This is due to the irrefutable fact that they are all gifted telepaths, due to having served time often looking into the lenses of live broadcast cameras. it is theorized that, because of this anomaly— a strange and untraceable signal seeming to intercept all of Rockefeller Plaza's Radio antennae transmissions, it may be an unknown extraterrestrial force attempting to comminicste with 30 Rock from space. On this day, they've been gathered and trapped here in an emergency focus group to attempt to remedy the problem. Haha. MAKE IT STOP. OH MY GOD WHAT IS THST, WHYYYYYYYYY! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYHY!!! Craters full of lullabies and dictionary definitions; Tense intimate interactions, and now, this hypertension. I have a secret, a dirty little secret. I didn't do it! It wasn't me! Hmm..okay–vouch. I'm telling you–wait– vouch? Yeah, I vouch. You're vouching me? I'm vouching you. She's vouching me. She vouched you. So i'm good? You're good. I'm good. You're good. Ok. SETH MEYERS is the best secret keeper in the entirety of the known and unknown multiverse. The respective deities and entities within the outer realms have taken notice to this; One of the world's greatest eve played game has become the ritualistic endeavor of tracking down this human in order to attempt to overwhelm him so that he might eventually crack or implode, or even acknowledge these sometimes outrageous events and otherworldly happenings; thus far, he has not. As of recently, the elders of the darkest deities from the furthest outer realms and legions of Hell have been taking this game with the now very famous and successful seth meyers, a popular TV host; this has elevated the e ntirety of the threshold for Seth's tolerance, and it appears he may soon be pushed to crack. So why are you on the wire? I atrophied at extravagant Tip toed in the tip ties; Til' then, i went there, Now summer starts in winter Now summer starts in winter Now summer starts in winter Pull the curtain back, Then you censor this Censor this! I pull the curtain back, then redact then redact don't react don't react It's an act it's an act Shit I pull the curtain back then I bow; It's a show now Pull the curtain back then I show, It's a showdown Listen up, Listen down I super blow my flow now, super bowl my pronouns You can't lose if you don't pick a team You can't win if you don't even play I can't pay you if I don't get a paycheck I can't work at it if it's not fame Oh no! I can't work at it if it's not fame. The isms is the synthesis; I only got one present for christmas When you [can] Take that spark and bury it in your heart, don't remark about it– Then, probably you're a comic Or an alcoholic, one of the two of them Wrong not to touch, then Willed you back into existence And still it's in exigence, and Guilty by association Guilty by association I just want to know what the current Tonight Show budget is for hair dye. Also wondering why JImmy's suit is grey, but his hair isn't? Is that a two in one? Honest to God my only question about this man. The rest can remain as mystery. Act V Part II Guilty By Association Sometimes I Stevie Wonder what you're up to; I can't see you but I know you're in my aura Sometimes I Richard Pryor while you're on my mind; I guess you could say you set my soul on fire My, my my Look what time it is I've only just begun to know you; Then I had to dieSo turn the light off My eye Turn the light off for awhile And follow me to darkness Follow me To the other side. It's not true, but it'll do I might have lost you somewhere Better off to leave you somewhere sure; If it's not pure And how could it be When only the light hits the snow And bounces off The warmth is an illusion, And your love is just a dream And anyway, anyway There's nothing i've ever been surer of Than the definite end, The enter and exit And when planets align, Only to fall completely out of orbit Now what was this for again Foreigner, object identified and destroyed it's destructive qualities, Tentative in a nature Sure, pressure– Resentment, Intense good moments of pleasure, Then signals sent Completely by accident. -Now that i've been thinking lately of Bill Murray And my formerly imaginary friend Riff Raff, Now i'm sure that There may be some telepathy involved Which means I should probably just– Go somewhere else now. Should I be sorry for my thoughts? I'd rather not, But still YO. Yo dude, what the fuck. I'VE BEEN STUCK IN THIS MOVIE FOR LIKE A YEAR. That's not that long… IT'S A LONG TIME TO BE IN A MOVIE. Please don't tear me to pieces; Don't blow the balloon up, No foul ball, No side eye No fowl play And dinner is as cold as it gets But dinner does warm In the aluminum foil, But all out of order, The border patrol is just Digging for details Digging for details. And it's this: You don't know what it is, Until you get into it, And it sets into you The only way it can When it's in you. Are you paying attention to this? Or can I just end it? Boston accents or what, And now i really think It's just inside my head It's just inside my head and This is getting weird. All of a sudden, I'm oh wonder and I love it And Sara Silverman has The prettiest brown eyes I've ever seen (on a celebrity) ((with whom I share a gender)) Aha. Okay, Sabrina Carpenter has a very pretty voice But that doesn't make me Any less jealous Or any less capable of explosion Disarm me I'm catching up on the specials I missed Being special I guess With no grocery subscription Aim low, Get high, I guess Rob Lowe, Build time, I guess I miss the old announcer, And the golden years I miss the former times And the mouse ears I learned my less I might got Kim K and TSwift Pointer Finger Could hold a tune to you, Who The joys of live theatre, And the catastrophe of the Impenetrable Boy oh boy is Television getting heavy Turn up the ridiculousness and Atrocious Atrocities and Acidophilus Anorexic, I wish i could digest this –and expand my vocabulary I wish I was better than I am So i could be Capable Can Kim Kardashian ever not just be Naturally beautiful at everything Doing everything Kim The J I can't sing in this apartment And it might actually kill me The devil lives next door on both sides I'm in a satan sandwich I guess I'm just Not free I must have fucked up last lifetime I must have fucked up last lifetime I might have looked just like her I want to get upstaged by Eddie Murphy More corpse suits! Pink lipstick! Slap the desk Check the camera Front loading! Front loading! I want a chance at humbling white america (just kidding) I want a wig that looks like an afro (cause I don't have one) I want Lorne Michaels to shame me into beng better By making me feel mediocre first So I hit the high bar When I hit the body bag I hit the body bag When I hit the high road With Letterman YOU STOLE MY BODY TO GO TO A BLACK TIE FUNCTION!? Yeah. Well–which one? Okay, you're gonna get a kick out of this. I'm giddy for physical comedy THIS IS MY MANIFEST DESTINY MY MANIFEST DESTINY AHHHHHHHH MY MANIFEST DESTINAAAAAAA Comedy comes in all forms And God comes in all Karma I brace myself for repeating my mantras I light candles But don't blow them out I just might get my wish DO NOT RESIST. I AM RESISTING THIS ARREST. Oh yeah. YES. Shoot him. NO, DON'T. SHOOT HIM, BILLY BOB, SHOOT ‘EM. Crocodile hunter turned hard-up cop Read him his rights! He ain't white enough. So she's perfect! Me? I've been taken in I can't stand to stamp I can't christmas, Backwards And backwash And sanford and sons And Whatever And… Ego might eat me like Eggos Like Hannibal Burress was holding At the market I left my Ego at the door But there's just no room for the both For the both of us I KNOW I'll just write her a hit show! What. YES. THEN, SHE'LL LEAVE SNL, AND THEN I'LL BE THE BLACK GIRL ON THE SHOW MWAAHAHAHAHAHA Ok. wtf happened to that girl? SUNNI BLU [kicking and screaming] I TOLD YOU I'M NOT GOING ON FA– —-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! So many beautiful people, or, rather The actors, Or should I say Vortex Then. Too many beautiful people I spent the whole night warm and holed up in the office What could come out of The Rock I don't know where to look I'm not used to the audience Duh, that. I'm a professional audience member But i don't remember the ending Anybody? Anybody? Any envy actor actress? BPM: Dosage Anxiety Remix Honestly fuck the comed circut I just want to know what it's like to have a body What's it like to have a body? I'm just a collective consciousness robot Adapting to my environment I can't sing in this apartment! I'm in a Satan Sandwich And would be The God in the middle If God didn't find this Absolutely hilarious So I'm on 24 hours; You're on Saturday Nights, But i'm on 24 I broke my Don't-look up-folks rule on Brittney Howard Cause I think i'm just like herBut more of a coward. You're on Saturday Night Live But i'm on 24 Hours It hurts longer And stronger Every moment I'm gone And still not a mom I wish I could change my eyes The color of the world Before it all ends Earth gone And oceans of mud No tide And no moon (The Earth without the Sun) I don't want to know you I don't want to owe you a lesson. I don't want to go there. I don't want no dance numbers. I don't want no GOATS here. No goats here. I don't get it, Mass Media– Is this flattery, or Deception? Humiliation? Based in perception, I see, so Is this recognition or Did I just send Dillon Francis my script in the beginning? No answer, by God. What an asshole What if Alienz Don't like lesbians. What is trance is just bad dance music. That's… What if edifice breaks for a daily regimen of Letterman? What if RUN, FALLON, RUN! I'M ATTACHED TO A KITE I HAVE NO CONTROL OF THIS. WELL, WHAT IS IT ATTACHED TO?! YOU DON'T WANNA KNOW! —NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONON AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Look, It's Meryl Streep! Holy shit, Meryl Streep is hot. What.(I can't keep secrets>) God doesn't keep good secrets. Just stop talking. Look, It's “My Bad Chad” Holyfuck Are you gonna have all those burned off too? Or can I do it for you? (might cost less) Jk Kim K That's a tough act to follow. Ariana? Nah, Backup; Had that. Meanwhile: Me in a hatchback Campin' at the Palisades. My name's the hammer –Adam ruins everything– I am not goin' starstruck –Adam Ruins Everything– My name's the Hammer (I'm a hammer, damn) –Adam Ruins Everything– I love showbiz But I got hard work comin on Now pause:: I need a break Need to make money Now i get a two for one Two for one Hate me or love me Either way, I'm gonna show up, Blow up, Glow up, And fuck off I'm a lost cause Cause I lost God On a talk show The way the camera moves makes me nauseous virtual reality And everybody's mad at me for Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy Conan “snowball” O'Brien But why's he called that. Shh! Not Yet. Oh, you are so overdone and fucked right now! Shh! My mom might be listening. Like she's never heard the word ‘fuck'? Shhhh! MOM I heard that! See! She said she heard it; she didn't say stop it. Well stop it. Fuck me man! SHH. KNOCK IT OFF. Yes Mrs. Mason Who the fuck is Mrs. Mason. Come on, white america; Put me on late night I promise you I'll watch more hallmark artists Than all of them Every day over here is a suit and tie function Camera one? YOU DONE FUCKED WITH US FOR THE LAST TIME. Ah shit. lol . whart is thrus. Fucking–magicians or something. Freemasons. F– Alright. Where is he? Where is who? You know who! What? Donaghey!!!!!!!! Lol Alec Baldin is like 200 years old. *cackles too hard, falls over and dies* Yikes. JACK DONAGHEY enters from a Parallel dimension and sees ALEC BALDWIN'S CORPSE. …Huh. Who's this handsome son of a bitch, I wonder. Don't wonder too hard. We gotta find that court order and get out of here. What court order [Cort hors d'oeuvres] what. I don't know. It almost kind of rhymed with corpse and wonder and I'm still stuck writing in cadences. What for! Oh wow, the neighbor was really a plant forreal. STOP SLAMMIN THAT Yo fuck this. Waht the fuck am I supposed to do with all this information. [appearing entirely out of nowhere, as always.] JIMMY FALLON I told you to burn it. OH MY FUCKING JESUS CHRIST. STOP DOING THAT. I can't. That's– Apparently what I do. WELL GET OUT OF HERE. Wish I could. Strapped to a kite. THEN HOW ARE YOU STANDING HERE? WHAT? I'm learning a lot of things up there! UP–WHERE! Up yours. WHAT. *poofs* UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I hate him. I HATE HIM. I HATE HIM. I hate this. TINA FEY Fuckit, he hates himself. Lets just assume. No, that's it. That's the singularity. What. It can't– He's just so confi— That's the singularity. [everything ploofs back to normal] See. I win. FUCK. ARE YOU SERIOUS!? I'M YOUNG AGAIN. i”M YOUNG AGAIN. [The entire cast stares at their returned to period-accurately aged cast mate; He appears so confident and wise, however–just a glint of insecurity falls over him–this indeed was the singularity; rather than to risk all of time and space defrabicating for a third and albeit final time, they rain down on their castmate, with the angry hellfire of a gregorian mob, urging him to GO LOVE YOURSELF. Long Night at work, or just Shoo fly, don't bother me– I'm more caught up on the Rudolph Storyline, How it's some mystic But I missed it With the lip stick And the vintage this and thats Person Welcome to Hogwarts, Of course, It's your funeral God bless the illuminati All I see is– NOT IT. IT WASN'T ME. I DIDN'T DO IT. JLO BITCH, STOP TALKING. Woah, What the FUCK JLO. JLO WHAT IN THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY? I–wh– Wait… Fallon? SHHHHThhHHHTHhhTHHHH!! Give me one bet Died inside Who's doing which thing God bless these envies! Gie me one shot Now who am I?Ace in the hole? I died inside. Don't break the barrier Don't run the wall Don't be the villain Fall, JImmy, Fall. To float, or to fall Or to walk away To shop at the mall Or to bet it all on Fall on And I tell you to jump, you jump! And I tell you to move, You move! And I tell you to movie, You movie! And I show you the blue OH GOD. Gimmie the binoculars! No, you don't wanna see What! Why not! HE MOONED ME. I got three of a kind Three of a kind Three of hearts Two of diamonds HAH. I DOn'T LiKE THIS. Fuck off, The Ace. And very kindly, Go fuck yourself. Four aces, Four aces A mindfuck for the both of us An open book And shotglasses And fans of ours Its good to laugh At the ones you love Love Love Love Love It's showbiz, It's showbiz; I love it I want to die. I love it I love it I missed the bar I fucked up somewhere. Don't look back in anger, Or don't look back at al. Fall, Fall, Fall Fall Fall Love Love Love Love Love Love Did you notice I haven't looked back. I put you up on a– Up on a Up on a pedestal Then remembered To forget it all, In indifference Foraged your signature Sorry, I don't want a lot of hawk-a-loogie clock-the-woman knockdown, dragout drama I got a feel for it. What if all your forfeitures were fortunes All your donuts turned subordinates To astronauts Or fake dreams for fak streams and dreaming of Don't bother me I'm on poverty I want walks on the beach and blue bunny ice cream sundaes I've got a whole city Marked off in my journal For frozen custard and Lost in a thought, are we? Trust me, I think I died. Trust me, I trusted the God of Mercy Trust me I went all the way to the burden, Bought a hammock And then worked harder than nobody No dropped calls from mother No one's home at all Work harder I thought Sweater Weather was my new DJ name, But as it turns out, It was my telepathy ringing me I rode to the top of the rock with the beatlesI didn't mean for it to be me But i was twice out of body, Once out of mind. Now give me a minute Please. Let me become indifferent Don't need no friends, Long roads Roundhouse kicks to the face Hard rolling baggage Heart shaped boxes Or Prophets Don't need dozens of roses don't need diamonds Do need dinosaursDo need phone numbers do Do do . –but don't– don't don't. When i fall in line I write books and poems, songs And suffer, slugger . This is what I struggled with– who paid the neighbor bitch to feed me the whole special And slam doors On my mental That shit struck a chord And rubbed me the wrong way But i'm humble I won't touch nobody's Body at all. Nobody's. Now my dreams make sense, kind of But why are these my dreams And not actual people and most of all What does it mean? That I'm equal to? Or lesser than? Like the emerald stone on Sir Paul McCartney's hand, I went green for a moment It's just banter.I'm just having a hard time (I can't sing in this apartment)I might need a band I might need a bandaid. I might need a bath Some peroxide and hair dye My heart's broken I'm having a hard time But still not struggling I might have a hard time But not as hard as the afterparty was, And I struck gold. Kept walking Roll dice. Four of a kind, Four kings, four aces Four of a kind, Four kites, And a night owl The Rock and the Kite, Part V STEFON It's this thing where… {Enter The Multiverse} –and that's why I wished my mom a happy birthday. [The Festival Project ™ ] Damn, the illuminati really showed out for the oscars this year. CONAN SHHHH. He even says “I Am” Then commands the stage Look at all those long legs Now we're on enclave or conclave? I don't know. I'm feeling more ravey. Tears of a Clown Nobody to save me Not even shug avery. Who? That's right? Now i'm feeling more Broadway, baby. L E G E N D S: Manifest Destiny I wanna see the snake sitting next to you; Show me those eyes I love models and the lack thereof Inside of them I want to see the feral reptile Show me those eyesI love that she flies through life Right to you Right It's a boys club Boy they Really prize these Chappel Roans and Timothee Chalemet But where am I at? –Adam Ruins Everything– A couple forced fake laughs Cause I like highlights Stagecrafts Craftservices And god knows I can't write like this And I'm About To die [CONAN O'BRIEN leaves television to run a Bed and Breakfast in ORLANDO.] INT. BED AND BREAKFAST. ORLANDO. … [Calamity ensues] Conan killed the oscars, Stole the wand, The show and the bowtie (hostses with the mostest) –and that's why he's Snowball. No, i'm sure it's because my fur is fluffy and– Okay no more outdated rick and morty references Fine. Was that Dillon Francis behind Ben Stiller Or do I still just like white guys That much. Why do A-Listers like reptiles so much? Show me those eyes, you know I could use a good lunch (Birds of Prey eat snakes) {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2018-2025 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.™ Episode Transcript: Yeah. Okay, this is terrifying. I haven't actually done this in it feels like way longer than it's been. In reality, it's only been like three like maybe three days, but it makes all the difference in the world. Hi. what's going on, I was just reminiscing about kitten mittens. Aw shit. I dropped my pen. If you remember if you're listening to this right now and you remember kittenman. congratulations, you've been with me since the beginning. um anyway, I don't know why I was just remembering that. kitten mittens. I thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world. I really I might have been delirious. losing my mind at a certain point, but I thought kittens was the best thing in the world. It was at the time. I was like I couldn't think of anything better. Then again, I was uh I don't know, I was discovering many hilarities. excuse the idiots in the back, they are idiots. um and they and they do this based on whatever I'm doing in my apartment. I'm their god. Anyway. I'm excused the background noise is still gonna be a a little bit uh while we're dealing with that, but at least you can help me collectively consciously remove them from existence entirely, um with the help of you know a collective existence we can get rid of evil. I don't I don't entirely. I'm not sure. I think that it would take a lot of people to understand that like a lot of it is just a game. I think it would take raising the entire consciousness of like people as a whole for them to understand that like, most of it is for entertainment and based off perceptions. So, like, whatever you' idea for the world is, like it was your idea. Whatever's making you upset is it was your idea. So I'm kind of coming to like terms with that in my own, like sense. I'm like, oh, yeah, like, whatever is happening, I'm like a certain like at the surface level is wrong, but like on a grander scale, like I programmed this into my reality for whatever purpose in order to better suit my, like ideal reality. That's, you know, that's that's it. I can't attribute it to anything else. They're idiots, cause I'm idiots. Anyway, what else is going on? I don't know, I was I'm gonna try and do this off book. I think I do have like I have some notes, but like I don't like the way that it feels when I'm going off of my notebook because it feels like robotic. It feels really, you know, like and not necessarily rehearsed, but it's it feels planned and when I listen back to the episodes where I do go off of like notes or something like that, I don't like the way that it sounds. Hearing myself back, going from a going going from like a script. And so I try to keep it like 100% improvisational and it keeps it fresh. and honestly, honesty goodness, I haven't been on the Peloton for like more than 15 minutes at a time since I stopped doing these episodes. I don't know what it is about the sound of my own voice, but maybe it's the fact that like, I'm in performance mode and I'm giving you guys like I'm in, you know, I'm like in my radio voice and then I'm watching back like a performance of myself in order to like, I don't know. It's like it's like experiencing myself for the first time secondhandedly because I'm not necessarily not thinking about what I'm saying, but I'm also not thinking about what what I'm saying or how I'm saying it as I'm saying it. And then, you know, sometimes I just really like even on my hardest days, sometimes I make myself laugh the very most, and I'm like, okay, there's another reason to keep doing it. Because for the most part, I'm like I don't wanna do this anymore, it costs me too much money and it's not. Like, I'm not a clut person. I'm just not a clout guy. I don't like doing stuff for clout, cause clout doesn't pay the bills and clout doesn't clout doesn't necessarily get you jobs, like unless it's like the right person's clout. Like, you get have clout from a million people, and if none of those million people are the well, a million is kind of where they drive line. Like if a million people are like, yeah, this is the shit, then it might get you a job. But like a million is probably the minimum number for that. Like if you don't have a million followers or you don't have a million views or you don't have a million of anything of just like clout like it doesn't pay bills. So I'm not a cloud person. I'm not just gonna do whatever off clout. What did I get off that on that clot rat for? I don't know, what was I saying? Oh, I'm going off book. I'm off. script. Anyway. what can I remember from things that I wrote down?, I don't know. I've been reading a lot. I've been, you know, doing doing the best that I can. I've been well, I've been reading. I've been reading children's books specifically because I'm finding information. Well, first of all, I picked up these children's books with the hope that I would be the owner of a small library and I'm not. I'm actually putting a lot of the books back into like society, which is fine. I'm just downsizing. It's actually helping me feel a lot better. Like my head is a lot clearer, my studio. My studio for for the first time in a long time was like a place that I can that I feel like I want to work. and it was the weirdest thing because I went through like a year of just like collecting whatever book I saw, like whether it was just like on a stoop, like I, you know, for whatever or out of the little free library or like just wherever, because books are everywhere in New York and that's probably my favorite thing hands down about New York is that like wherever you go there are books and they're free and you can pick them up. But I'm also very sensitive to energy, so as like an energy worker and a transmuter, it became congested to the point where it's like, okay, there is like a certain type of energy that's not that's foreign to me and as much cleansing and as much like, you know, whatever, as much, you know, in any kind of, you know, like spiritual work I was doing, there's an energy here that I'm not necessarily comfortable with. And I realized every time I picked up a book, I fell into like a certain type of world, you know, and it wasn't just like whether the book caught my attention from just like the cover or whatever, and then I decided to flip through it or whether it was like a book that I was stuck in, I was falling until like a certain energy or a certain world and that every book had a certain energy to it. And so I realized after a year of collecting hundreds of books that I had literally hundreds of energies, like floating through my space and it became like hectic and it became heavy to the point where I was like, like, I don't necessarily want to hold on to all these things. and so it's it's been really rejuvenating. I've been going through a time of just like not necessarily like I know I have a lot of stuff to do. but one of the stuff to do is is like going through all of the things that I know that I need to like let go of in order to feel better. And it has been helping me feel better. It has for the most part, I'm still doing a lot with like my energy recovery and the noise here has a lot to do with it. I'm now like I now have anxiety to the point where I have like a consistent nauseum. like every time I hear like any kind of motor, like I get sick and now it's it's actually getting worse the longer that I've stayed here with the noise, it's like I now have like an upset stomach all the time, headaches twitches. It's the it's the most fucked up thing ever. and I've also been learning more about because I'm, you know, still still really focused in my music and so frequencies and, you know, like I've always been like a huge believer and like layered frequencies for healing, like sound healing, beta thick alpha, and and the whatnot, but I finally caught onto a piece of information that made me realize how the noise outside has affected my brain chemistry and not just in the way that it's like it's annoying or it's a nuisance or it's harassment, which it is all of those things, according to the law, but in a sense of what's happening to my brain chemically, like the chemical changes that are happening in my brain, or the frequency changes that are happening in my brain are actually the things that are making me more upset than loss of sleep, or, you know, like a disruption or disorganization of my mind or my daily habits. The thing that's making me the most upset is what I'm realizing is it's changing my frequency, and I'm not talking about just my my aura I well, I am in a sense, but like the frequency, the frequency differences that that your brain your brain goes into different frequencies during, you know, waking state, alha state, better state, you know, and when you're sleeping, you're in um I well, it depends on the person actually, and it depends on the type of sleep that you're getting. Like most people sleep and like a data state from what I'm understanding and this is the state of like conscious dreaming. And this is this, I could be incorrect because honestly, I layer them anyway. And I finally I finally did it. I I did. I' I was working on a song and I realized that I achieved like perfect theta without actually even meaning to. And I think I did another one and that was like in perfect gamma without even like it was just mixed perfectly. that it I was also listening to like a gamatone and then I realized I was like, wait, is that the song or is it the tone? Because, you know, if the if the frequency that you're listening to is pure enough, it will actually distort the bass or the, you know, it will distort the entire sound of whatever you're listening to. So sometimes things can sound warped or like they're waving or like they're going through something because those tones are kind of like they're they're moving against each other or with each other just kind of depends. And so what what has been, well, I wanted to finish, well, yeah, I think I have at least one song now that's in theta, and I have at least one song that's in gamma, completely. and and I and I shocked myself because I was listening to the tones and I was like, wait, the wait a second. like, I'm feeling like double here. Is this this song that I'm listening to, that I'm checking back the mix, or is this the the frequencies? And I I turned off all the frequencies and sure enough, it was the song. It was like a pure I was like, wow. I'm like that's an achievement. I did it completely by accident and I wish I knew the formula that I used to do that.c some people are so mathematic about it. Like some people are so uh like, you know, some people do this to their music. A lot of people, especially inass music, that's why it is the way that it is, is you're going to a show to get these frequencies like zapped into your body at at full forces. and some people know how to do it on purpose. I did it on accident, so I'm like, if I can continue to achieve at this but I'm trying to figure out like the mathematical equation or like the actual sonic equation for making this happen, like every time, because going through my history ofass music, I will finish in a second, going through my history of bass music, I have always gravitated to the to these frequencies, to the frequencies that make me feel better after a certain amount of time listening to them or a certain amount of time being in in that frequency. So that's this is the music that has, I guess subconsciously kind of for the kind of artist that I am. But this is the reason why I'm upset about the noise. like the most upset about it, like not even on a legal level, on a social level, on a moral level, like, no, this is actually morally wrong, it is morally wrong on so many fucking levels. I'm like, why are you so like, why obviously I did this on purpose, like in my God complex, I'm like, oh, well, I can better the community as long as I make a point, like that environmentally, this is damaging people. It's giving people mental illness, that it or like if they're predisposed to mental illness, it's even worse, but it's it's also like causing mental illness and people that are otherwise healthy people, which is not a lot of people in New York City given. It's just not. It's not a healthy place. A lot of people are not healthy. But even in like moderately healthy humans, this noise disruption can cause like brain changes and chemistry changes, and this is the reason why I'm so upset is because when you are sleeping, if you are sleeping, your brain is in a certain level that is like in a healing state. In the first few minutes that you wake up, as I understand it. In the first few minutes after you wake up, your brain is in a state that it can like that you can manipulate your entire environment, that you can change things, that you can heal yourself. And so when I'm waking up in the first few minutes in the very first thing that I hear is a motorcycle that's ripping through my fucking brain, it's changing my brain frequency from a frequency that is like at the at the at a human level or at any kind of level, kind of the the thing that makes every human capable of being a genius, not the genius level able to heal yourself and the frequency that you're able to heal yourself is what you automatically wake up in. So when you' when this frequency is interrupted, it's intercepted in immediately into a negative thought pattern. And so you immediately, so what's happening, what's been happening to me over the last year with the motorcycle nuisance harassment problem or whatever the fuck I don't care what it's called on paper. I just want it to stop like I just want to live in peace. It's not like and kind of having like coming from a a background where I kind of tend to have like take responsibility for myself, like oh, it must be something that I'm doing and yes, I also have like a higher god complex or like an ego if you want to call it, that's like, oh no, I must have done this on purpose. And you know, like in order for the greater good, like in order to fulfill my purpose in some sort of way, it must be it must be part of my process to have this. That's also my ego like I'm a god. like, you know, that's just me, that's the generation. That's the generation that I come from. That's our mindset. Like nothing happens in this world without me in it, period. That's why rappers are rappers and that's why that's why models are models. We all have egos and it's really hard to kill the bitch. I've had at least ten ego dusts throughout my fucking like existence and it still comes back. It doesn't matter. You can have an ego death and be like a completely ego list for like what, six months tops? Eventually you're gonna have like the ego is is is imp important to survival, because I lost the word. I think implemental what was I gonna use? I was definitely a for syllable word. Either way, it is you need it. Like if you if you oh, you know, people might describe people, like being in like a in a sense of humility as like, oh, just completely without ego, but like at the end of the day, like, no, like your ego allows you to actually like compensate with the rest of the world, like, most people do not have no ego entirely, or at least for like, like a week after your acid tri or whatever, yeah, like, oh, had ego death and I completely. But like within I swear to God, like within six months time, like your ego has at least minimally like repaired itself. That's what an ego does, that's why you have it. You have it. It's a survival. It's it's a part of your consciousness that has to do with survival if you don't have your ego, like you're pretty much dead in the world, especially the way it is now. Anyway, this is that that's going to probably close up my spiel on that. Yeah, I'm upset because instead of like the first few moments of my waking moments being a healing, time, it is immediately going into disarray and chaos and anxiety. And so in in so I'm losing like, I don't I don't really care about oh, I mean, like I care about life in a sense, but I mean, like, and it in a mortal sense. I like, yes, it's taking years off of me. and I feel it like in the way that it's like, I I am slower to do regular things or like, whatever my rising thoughts, might be are completely just destroyed by this like what I've what I've come to perceive is like an evil force. It is evil in so many levels again this breaks down from like a higher consciousness to like a lower state of consciousness. The lower state of consciousness is saying that like these people are just idiots. They're idiots and they are not self aware of the fucking like pollution that they're doing on kind of middle sense, I'm like, oh, it's politics, it's like gentrification if these guys run around in circles, then people call up the fucking place, the place gets fucking more allocated funds to their fucking police officers, the police officers have fucking filling their quotas. It's all bureaucracy and paperwork and politics on that middle level and on the highest level it is like no, this is evil, it's pure evil because people are so grossed out by the fact that fucking New York is New York and also the wage and income and quality factor is that this guy is doing whatever the fuck he has to do brown. He's doing well, not that guy. that guy's that guy's a weak dick motherfucker. He has a small dick and everybody in the neighborhood knows it. He drives around and circle making people miserable. He also I'm it's the same dude. that same dude followed me to the Trader Joe's. It's the same dude, so I'm like, I like I know the sound of his bike from anything, so I definitely know when I'm at the Trader Joe's and then he's like all of a sudden traffic like, I'm like yo dude like why the fuck you following me to Trader Joe's like I live four miles away, which is not that far on the fucking motorcycle, but I came all the way over here on the subway for you to follow me on your bike. week, dick, bro.way, like, fuck this, fuck this, fuck that guy, fuck this neighborhood, fuck this place, fuck these politics, fuck these people. On a low frequency. Like on a low frequency, I'm like, fuck all this, like on a high frequency, I'm like, there's a purpose or whatever, it'll work, is temporary, blah, blah, blah. What the fuck was I saying? I don't know. I what the fuck was I ranting? I don't know. I that's that shiel, right? Trader Joe, hello Trader Joe. It's not safe. No, but you know, oh man, let's you say I, whatever. Let's just say oh, whatever. a lot. What else do we got? I don't know. I put on an album that came out today, yay, it's called all the rage. Actually, all that all that gripe about like, oh, it's an EP when I'm sure that the stores are gonna call it an album. I was like, I'm sure it's gonna be an album, so I just started calling it an album. like the release comes out and they're like, it's an EP, you congratulations. So I I thought I was putting out an album, that I was an EP, but it just missed the cutoff her album, because technically you can have a six track album and if it's over 30 minutes. If and you can have a six track album that's an EP like this, all the range is technically an EP at least according to Spotify's standards. And it's, I think it's like two and a half minutes under I think it's like 2 and a half minutes under, so it's an EP, but it's six tracks and I'm really excited about it. I kind of put a little bit more promotion into it than usual. I even had some press done, and that's great. because you can get pressed done. They're like,Yo, for $500. You'll be famous tomorrow. I'm like, that fucked up. That's a paycheck for some people. and that's not famous. also. They're charging people to be like spectacular. Well, they're charging they're like charging for people to be like popular, which is I think it's wrong, like ethically, you shouldn't be able to do that, like, oh, no, you're gonna get on all the playlists and whatever, you're gonna have like all like you should not be able to sell followers, like whether they're real people, which is slavery or they're robots, which is also slavery. Like you should not be able to sell fame that's making it like now I don't even trust like, okay, like this person got an award, but like, okay, because because the album was popular, because it was better than all the other ones. Or like, how do you know that you even heard all the albums because there are so many, and that like, okay, this person who put like zero dollars into promotion, how do you know that album wasn't better? because you didn't hear it? Because the person with a million dollar ad campaign won the fucking won the fucking award? Because you heard it because they put a million dollars into the fucking promotions. So it makes it makes everything the fact that everything is on a level system that's based on money is completely unfair. Like the all the industries are broken, it's not just music. Like, it's not just music. I'm like, holy shit, like you could spend like a year, an average year salary, which is what's the median income now. even with like no adjustment for inflation, like what, $50,000? Okay. So you could spend $50,000 on your your career so you'd have to you'd have to do that. That's even you're still competing with people who have a million dollars for doing nothing. That's insane. Anyway, I'm not bitter. What the fuck did I do earlier that I wasn't that literally the spirit that was like, don't be salty. I was like, oh, I was like,Yo, stop teaching models to fucking DJ, because I I happened on this girl that was like, yo, like I actually liked some of her music. I liked some of her music, but she wasn't doing much. And like everything was just fake. It was like super duper fake, but she was mad gorgeous and like more of these girls are popping up out of nowhere that are like not they're like models that are barely touching the decks and they're like a march. I'm like yo, dude, if that girl made this music like okay, maybe I should see her, but like, I'm like no somebody goes produce this because like she's moving badly in time to it and I realized something about being a producer is like yo if you spent enough time actually crafting this like this piece, you're not gonna move like badly to it like you're not going to move weird to music that you made because it's in you like it came from in your body. So like, I was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm looking at and I'm like, oh, I'm looking at propaganda. But then like, isn't that just kind of like discouraging people who don't have that type of body type or mindset, but it was funny because the algorithm was like don't be salty. It was like DJing is for everybody and if that's your passion and I'm like yeah, if that's your passion, but like, yo, when what where is the line between like propaganda and passion? Like, oh, I'm already a successful like, multimillionaire fashion model, but like I'm gonna be a DJ, like it washes out all the people who have actually like put in the work. It washes out all the people who have actually put in the work. Don't be salty. I was like fine, fine, but only because I like that algorithm. Only because I like that algorithm. I'm like fine, okay, we'll we'll be whatever. Whatever I've been reading. Oh, I read a book, let's see, let's see if I can remember the ones I already put back. I've been reading these uh this like children's book series on like famous people because I realized that they're written for children and I'm like, yo, dude, like somebody could read this whole series in the second grade and be smarter than me because I didn't know anything about the people that I'm reading about at all. And so they're like these little biographies. Well, I mean, they they're on a child's level. I don't know how long it would take a child to read, but they take me like an hour, hour and a half to read just like at a normal speed. And I read really fast. But I think the reason why from taking me so long to read them is because I actually take like a lot of I take a lot of like, I don't know, words or art to me, so if something is like especially musical, I might take it and be like that's a good song title. Like, if I think enough about this and what I know about this, like what kind of song is it? And, you know, just like little fun facts. Like first of all, I'm obsessed with George Lucas. I've never been a huge Star Wars person, just and I I realizing this. I've never been being on like Star Wars wicked. like, I've never been being on things that are like really, really big, but then I did grow up and kind of like a sheltered shut community where like most of the people like twilight, I wasn't hungerames, aylys Cyrus, well Hannah Montana at the time, okay? I just wasn't into those things, but most mostly because they're fans, actually, she just put out something that I kind of piqued my interest. It was in my fucking sl side bar. I was like, oh, no, what's this? I'm I might check it out. But I've been staying off the mainstream just cause I'm realizing like the reason that I'm seeing this is money and doesn't necessarily make it better or worse than anybody else. Because sometimes mainstream artists come out with crap and I think they do it on purpose, they're like,Yo, watch this. I can do whatever because so many millions of people love me, watch this. I'm like, damn. And then millions of people are like, yay, yes, yes, this. I'm like, the fuck? What did you do? And I'm pretty sure the mainstream artist is like consciously, even collectively like, you see what I'm saying? I can do whatever the fuck.c I did one thing cool, maybe like five things cool, like a long time ago, and literally don't have to do anything else. I just do this just to prove a poil. Like, I can shit on a track, literally. And millions of people will be like, I love you. I love you, please more of those. do it again. I'm like, oh, God, please, no. What the fuck? Millions of fans. Like once you have your fucking fan based unlock, like that's it. Like, you don't have to fucking people will be like, literally kissing at all of the ground that you touch for the rest of forever forever. That's it. I'm realizing that about fantom, so I'm like, yo, if you know what kitten mittens are. I'd still don't, but if you if you know kitten mittens, congrats, you're one of 12 people who actually like me. one of 12. I'm like 12 is enough. That's what Jesus had, right? might as well and Jesus technically have like 11 I don't know why I like that guy so much. I'm pretty much obsessed with him, too. I love Jesus. I'm like, Jesus is the god kind of I mean, like he's technically like three gods. anyway, why am I obsessed with uh George Lucas? First of all, he's one of the coolest people ever, Kate, like, okay, first he was a greaser, like a real greaser. like from the movie Grease, but like the actual thing before the movie Grease, cause if I if I'm not mistaken, he was like a greaser before they made Grease. That's crazy. Yeah, because Gre was like in the 70s, but it was about the 50s, right? I don't know. He was like an actual real life, like they just put Vaseline, I guess in their hair and wore like dirty shit and they were like, yeaheah, greaser. and they w and they fucking drove and they drove, what did they drive? I don't know, cars, old cars, and they would race them. I that was honestly I'm obsessed with this dude. I and now I kind of want to see Star Wars because I've never seen them. But honestly Star Wars is one of those things that, oh, that's what I was saying. God, yeah, well, yeah, I like grew up not liking Star Wars because all the people that liked it were mean. Like all those other things I named earlier in the episode. Like they're fans sucked, so I was like, I definitely cannot see myself getting into this. And so I never did, but now I'm well, as happy as I am being single. I save certain things for like just a case. I ever get in a relationship. I'm like Star Wars. I've never seen that. Like I saved certain things for like you know, like I wouldn't necessarily want to watch it by myself. I think I'd get geeked, though, now, now that I understand, like the kind of person that created Star Wars, I'm like, yo, dude, like he's the shit. Like, okay, first of all, okay, if I did the math, secondly, no, cause the first of all thing was like, he's a greaser. That's the coolest thing about George Lucas. Yeah. I mean, like I mean, like there was so many cool things. I had to take notes, I had to stop. I was like bending back pages, I was like, all this dude's the best. Okay. I was like,Yo, okay, whatever. Like, uh, oh, well, that was one of the last things I read. If I did the math right, this dude has like a 12 year old. He's older than my dad. My dad's pushing 80. I'm like, is he 80? He's like 80 with a 12 year old. That's incredible. That's I have so much respected admiration for that. Because it kind of proves my point that like if you're dude, you can just like keep on popping them out, popping them out. But he also like adopted kids, I think. Yeah, yeah. And he also like adopted kids. was at him? Yeah. Yo, I'm telling you there's so much practice into these little books. I'm like, okay, whatever, what else is cool. I don't know, he just seems he just seems like the dude just seems like the dude. I was likeYo. I I can't remember all the notes I took, but those those two things alone. I'm like, yeah, I earn my respect. I did write down a quote earlier that was like, what did he used to say? oh, do that again but better? I'm like, yeah, that sounds that sounds accurate. And then I liked the fact that like all his worlds within his worlds are like connected, so he'll leave Easter eggs within worlds of different Indiana Smith. He really liked the name Indiana because I guess he had a dog named Indiana, which was named after somebody else that was named Indiana. And I had no idea that Indiana Jones was like his brainchild or like close to it. I was like, whoa, this dudees are fucking legend, like a real like an actual, like this dude's a G for George Lucas. He's the best. I was like, yeah, dude. I could not put that book down. I was like sitting in cold bathtub water like, oh my God, this is such a pain turner. I gotta read about this dude until the very end of this book and I did. I would not put it down. I was like, George Lucas is the man, bro. like the man, I don't like like, yo, cool dude. I like that guy. I've never seen Star Wars. I have, I've seen like the beginning. It's like in the time, blah, fucking blah, blah, fucking talk. Yeah, and then I started writing my own movies, you know. It's not that any of them, you know, as whatever, you know, sometimes it's circumstance, sometimes sometimes I' just realize that I make excuses. Like I have no reason not to be as successful as any of these people that I'm reading about, because I'm finding personality traits about myself as I'm reading about them, like Albert Einstein Total Duis. He might have been like like functionally retarded. I'm pretty sure he was retarded, but also a genius. Like like, oh, okay, this is the coolest thing about Albert Einstein are we done inukas never, never. He's immortal, right? We'll see him at some point. He's so cool. He's so cool anyway. I was like, yeah, dude, this dude is cool. But there's that's the Alb Einstein, my man, okay, so like, slowly almost solely responsible for the invention of the Adamah. That's dope. On accident, though, because once he realized what had like once he realized that, okay, like, okay, I'm correct about this. For sure, I'm definitely correct about this, but like, yo okay, should we back up a little bit? First of all, he didn't say anything until he was like four. Didn't say anything, not a not a single word, his parents were like,o, something's wrong with him. Like even back in the day where it's like, uh don't know. Something's wrong with him. He's not saying anything. The doctors were like, he's perfectly fine.'s fine. And he didn't say anything his entire life until one day, apparently, he sat down to dinner with his parents and the soup was too hot, and that's what he said he's like the soup is too hot. Like, could you imagine, like having a kid that you're like 100% sure is retarded? Oops, nope, you can't say that. Okay, well, you could. Then so let's just shouldn't I just cancel you can't say that. Why, though? Like, okay, when I was growing up, you have to understand I come from a time where it was like you could just call that to somebody cause they were being dumb, but not dumb, right? But I mean like at a certain point, like, okay, technically Helen Keller was deaf dumb and blind, but like sometime and I'm assuming like between the 70s and 80s, it became a slang for like that's dumb. Like, don't do that because whatever you're doing is not right, which is like, okay if you're not right, then you're what? Retarded. Like, I'm sorry. I'm like some certain things are not going to be like, I'm, you know. I'm like early 2000s game or culture, that's gay, but I love gay. It's like nobody's being derogatory about that. I'm being derogatory about your behavior and I might even use it as like a positive you know what's what describing words or adjectives? I don't know. I'm going through. I'm going to processes realizing that like, okay, I'm at the age where certain information is gonna be offloaded. Certain like it's not coming back ever. Like, you like, I I know Spanish, but only if I have to speak it and it's not like, I'm not developing any other nothing else is like my brain is like, we don't need this, do we? I'm like, I don't know. Maybe I should hold on to that. No, no, we don't need this. I'm like, okay, well. there are certain things about me that are just not gonna change at this point. I'm not sorry, because honestly, weren't too offended at everything when, like, there're there are things that are offensive that nobody really is offended about. like, if you really found an offensive, it would not exist anymore, you know? Because when somebody becomes really passionate about something, and they change it. Which is why I'm taking my time. I like, youo, annihilation is imminent. Like this cannot be anymore. Like, you don't change my brain chemistry. Fuck that shit. my brain chemistry is perfect the way that it is. Like I'm almost sure that like the entire mental health industry will change based on ideals that are like blooming and other like in other what the fuck was I just saying exactly ideas that are already springing up in in small circles. like they'll, you know, be one day. Like that's just valid, like nothing's really wrong with you. something's wrong with the world. Like, why? Like, and what can we do to change that? It could be environmental completely. It could take somebody with like severe mental health issues, severe schizophrenia, severe bipolar disorder, severe fucking severe depression, severe anxiety and change their environmental factors or even just like change the fact that that like they're facing poverty, poverty is a mental illness and that's not what it's not looked at as such. It's looked at as a deficiency on the individual's part when it could be like and it could be a polethro of environmental factors. That'll change. It will in my lifetime. I know that it will. It may not be because of me because for the most part, I'm a pacifist. I really am. I'm a yoder, like, honestly, it has to be like visibly hurting someone else or hurting me painfully enough for me to be passionate about it to make it change. Like, I'm sorry, I'm not. I don't want I don't really want to be a leader, especially because like people are still like populating this planet. I don't necessarily I don't I don't wanna be like a a leader in anything because that is like that's too much power. Honestly, just let me play the music and then fuck off. And I will fuck off. Like if you think I talk too much or you find me annoying or you think I'm stupid like eventually I I disappear. That's it a self-reflective Go away, all right. I't have to be asked twice. I don't stay in places where I'm not welcome. So, New York it's been good. Are't not really. But somebody I thought okay, who else am I obsessed with? I love this new lady that I found. Her name is Gina something rather fucking amazing. I I love New York people because I love New York people. Like I really do. like it is well, it's hard to fucking there's a fucking oh, honestly, it could be simplified to this as like, okay, maybe this embraces like the new the New York feminine and what I really hate is the New York masculine, which is just toxic, just disgusting, like where I spinning on things, shut the fuck up, like, are you not self aware? Like it's it's certain level of and I'm not, I'm really not binary in the sense where it's like balanc, bro. like balance, like a little bit of everything is good and like half masculine, half feminine is like a good balance, non-binary embracing that. But like yo, dude, there's a certain rasculinity about the city that's the thing that makes it nasty. It was like, whoa. whoa. I'm like, that's nasty, but I was oh, okay, I'm in love with this person. Her name is like Gene or something rather. I'm still I still have like I no, I have no feet in the comedy pool cause like I realized I stopped performing comedy and I stopped writing it, and like all the like semi tragic possibility, like possibly hilarious situations that were happening to me when I was actively writing comedy just stopped. I was like good, I don't necessarily need to be in that right now. That's that has sailed and will probably later sink, but I don't want to be in there if like, okay, like you're funny, if like sad and bad shit happens to you all the time. I'm like, that's fucked up. I don't wanna be that guyc 50 years from now I could be that guy and like still not earn a penny more than I'm earning right now making music underground. So if it's if I had to choose between the two, I've already earned mastery in recording arts. 10,000 hours or more, like I don't necessarily like being a comic is like another ladder. It's another it's a thing. And honestly, when I stopped like, well, I mean, like I I took a break from tears of a clown because it became such a like passion project for me that I was like, oh, this is that I'm caring too much like I should stop. and still not finish and it's not it's not like, it never had a release date in mind, so it's not necessarily like what's it delayed? Yeah, it's not delayed, and it's not it's definitely not in hiatus, but like, I realized that I have a certain responsibility to my audience altogether. It like to do this show as well and so like this, there's been taking kind of a priority, knowing that like my hiatus has been longer than any other hiatus is, and that I owe it to like my homegrown audience and my weird coat following to like okay like I have to give you guys everything from fucking like November to now and just musically that's a lot but then I've also the writing has also accompanied it and so it would be a shame to just let that go entirely because I feel that like my actual, my actual fan base is here in this show, unfortunately, well, not unfortunately, because I've started to get like a sense of familiarity within the dance music scene, like, as a producer through this podcast as a medium, because when I started doing this podcast, like, it wasn't like people weren't generally like now people are doing like following my, what's it? format. Like people weren't really doing DJ mixes and like putting music on podcasts, like it just wasn't people weren't doing it. I was the only one doing it now everybody's doing it and it makes me want to do it less, but then also like I have to kind of show consistency with myself in order for me to feel like I'm still doing something. What was that rant about? I don't know. I'm obsessed with this lady name's Gina or something rather. She's super New York. What would she say? that I really liked? Oh, if you didn't know the rules before you got to New York, you you like if you came to New York and you're not having a good time, you probably didn't know the rules before you got here.rect. I didn't come here on purpose. This was my layover city. I came here by accident and I did not know the rules. Now I'm learning the rules and I'm like the rules are fucked up and rules are kind of meant to be broken if you're disturbing my peace, I will then disturb your peace. No, I will not. I do not believe an eye for an eye, and also I feel that you are dangerous people. I will then report you to the police and and make the proper documentation in order for it to stop. I'm a snitch. I don't give a fuck. Like if you're actually hurting me, like if you're changing my the way that I think and the way that I feel, like if you're making me sick inside of my own environment, like you deserve it. I'll give a fuck. I don't give a fuck. I don't give any kind of fuck. And then that way, I am a feminist, cause it's like, yo, dude, like how long are you gonna sit and take somebody hurting you before you actually realize that like you're not the problem they are and in order for their behavior to stop, you have to actually like you have to prevent this by stepping up for yourself. It's kind of like a show and like, okay, like like at a certain point it is kind of like a game. Like how long are you going to let me do this to you before you just fucking like get up and fucking hit me back? And I'm like, I don't want to like, I don't want to fight, but at the same time, like, bro, like I've been getting my ass whipped by these idiots and so I'm like, okay, I have to actually, but I'm still not a fighter. I have to do it in a way that makes sense and so that the community can be improved when I move on. Like I don't necessarily want to put somebody in the same place that I am now because I really am not I don't and just improve it. Like I believe so much in doing that, like not just leaving no trace, but like improving the place from which you are situated when you leave so that when the next person comes through, they don't have to struggle through the same hardship. So in that way, leadership, sure, be

[A beautiful dog enters the palace; C'esme't is pleased—actually, more thrilled.] Now! (Yo!) [The Dog sits at the entrance.] Call to me. [he speaks from the mind (telepathically) with a familiar tonal voice] Come, sweet stranger! [The Dog approaches] For it is I, the King who walks as not a ghost For yet the call has spoken that I be your loyal shadow (it's me; the King. I've been called to watch over you) Then? (Elaborate.) For now I came as waked dost I as ghost and wandered, pity and pardoned by no army dared Aghast my throne And agape my eyes, Wide my mouth and nostrils, Disemboweled and yet, I did wake with my fortune And tidings in my kingdom, a hidden realm, For there slayed, as I wept, The others dared to swallow, This truth, I, as knight and pawn doth slay the Queen, For titled King no friend of mine; And now, this beast as blood dost froth, My mind does waste, but here I bark Fortunate! To be laid by as you, I will. Then, creature, as you may! For free, this I, And coming not the time I shall l awaken, And then, though, Does the true challenge to bear, The altar; the stone, the shield and the rope From which I pull, and thee shall fight. Marriage of souls. To fancy this beast, betrayeth not. For something barks as is an end As a man does call a lover friend And so lover-friend I am and shall be. Lol what the fuck. So he's a dog now. ‍♀️ wtf is going on in this show. Idk. I'm baked. Enter The Multiverse L E G E N D S: Manifest Destiny ‍♂️ Ascension: Enter the Multiverse The titles switched. Good idea. So maybe I should stick with t mobile? Idk. Mint mobile is 15 dollars a month for unlimited talk and text. HERE AND NOW I DECREE, THIS FEAST DOES NOURISH ALL OUR MINDS AND HEARTS TO FIGHT THE GOOD WAR AGAINST ALL HE WHO SQUANDER THE MERCY OF PEACE! TO COURAGE! lol you lost me. I'm grasping at strings here. I needs a means to an end I need a body bag, body bag I need a King and a dog And a cat and an owl And a mark and a dawn And a knife and a gun Call it what you want I was not at the rock But that's where I was going I'm lost in Omaha I was just on the dark With the dark and the walkers The king and the rabbit The facts and the stalkers But who sunk the boat? Who sunk the boat Now this is encouragement! Acknowledgements? Nothing yet. Disaster strikes obvious and No regrets But obvious I'm in it for the long run And it transpired for the job done But the waffles came out awful And crispier than I wanted Almost every time So I took the iron back to target And I know I came out with a double album in August But I got no promotions So I won't walk the carpet So I won't walk the carpet I know I know I'm no Joan Rivers Or Joan of ark so I won't talk the gossip I won't talk the gossip I won't talk the gossip Now, more followers Show boat, Throw him overboard into a rowboat With no paddles And horseshoes on em— That outta show ‘em Rondevouz Rob us all Noah's Ark Don't get so lost in the story Lost in the sory Lost in the LORNE MICHAELS …you caused this. [In a secret lab inside of 30 Rock, A group of SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE alumni are trapped inside a metal box; this room has no doors and no windows and seems to be amplifying thought frequencies each of them hears uniquely, but distinctly, and very, very loudly. This is due to the irrefutable fact that they are all gifted telepaths, due to having served time often looking into the lenses of live broadcast cameras. it is theorized that, because of this anomaly— a strange and untraceable signal seeming to intercept all of Rockefeller Plaza's Radio antennae transmissions, it may be an unknown extraterrestrial force attempting to comminicste with 30 Rock from space. On this day, they've been gathered and trapped here in an emergency focus group to attempt to remedy the problem. Haha. MAKE IT STOP. OH MY GOD WHAT IS THST, WHYYYYYYYYY! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYHY!!! Craters full of lullabies and dictionary definitions; Tense intimate interactions, and now, this hypertension. I have a secret, a dirty little secret. I didn't do it! It wasn't me! Hmm..okay–vouch. I'm telling you–wait– vouch? Yeah, I vouch. You're vouching me? I'm vouching you. She's vouching me. She vouched you. So i'm good? You're good. I'm good. You're good. Ok. SETH MEYERS is the best secret keeper in the entirety of the known and unknown multiverse. The respective deities and entities within the outer realms have taken notice to this; One of the world's greatest eve played game has become the ritualistic endeavor of tracking down this human in order to attempt to overwhelm him so that he might eventually crack or implode, or even acknowledge these sometimes outrageous events and otherworldly happenings; thus far, he has not. As of recently, the elders of the darkest deities from the furthest outer realms and legions of Hell have been taking this game with the now very famous and successful seth meyers, a popular TV host; this has elevated the e ntirety of the threshold for Seth's tolerance, and it appears he may soon be pushed to crack. So why are you on the wire? I atrophied at extravagant Tip toed in the tip ties; Til' then, i went there, Now summer starts in winter Now summer starts in winter Now summer starts in winter Pull the curtain back, Then you censor this Censor this! I pull the curtain back, then redact then redact don't react don't react It's an act it's an act Shit I pull the curtain back then I bow; It's a show now Pull the curtain back then I show, It's a showdown Listen up, Listen down I super blow my flow now, super bowl my pronouns You can't lose if you don't pick a team You can't win if you don't even play I can't pay you if I don't get a paycheck I can't work at it if it's not fame Oh no! I can't work at it if it's not fame. The isms is the synthesis; I only got one present for christmas When you [can] Take that spark and bury it in your heart, don't remark about it– Then, probably you're a comic Or an alcoholic, one of the two of them Wrong not to touch, then Willed you back into existence And still it's in exigence, and Guilty by association Guilty by association I just want to know what the current Tonight Show budget is for hair dye. Also wondering why JImmy's suit is grey, but his hair isn't? Is that a two in one? Honest to God my only question about this man. The rest can remain as mystery. Act V Part II Guilty By Association Sometimes I Stevie Wonder what you're up to; I can't see you but I know you're in my aura Sometimes I Richard Pryor while you're on my mind; I guess you could say you set my soul on fire My, my my Look what time it is I've only just begun to know you; Then I had to dieSo turn the light off My eye Turn the light off for awhile And follow me to darkness Follow me To the other side. It's not true, but it'll do I might have lost you somewhere Better off to leave you somewhere sure; If it's not pure And how could it be When only the light hits the snow And bounces off The warmth is an illusion, And your love is just a dream And anyway, anyway There's nothing i've ever been surer of Than the definite end, The enter and exit And when planets align, Only to fall completely out of orbit Now what was this for again Foreigner, object identified and destroyed it's destructive qualities, Tentative in a nature Sure, pressure– Resentment, Intense good moments of pleasure, Then signals sent Completely by accident. -Now that i've been thinking lately of Bill Murray And my formerly imaginary friend Riff Raff, Now i'm sure that There may be some telepathy involved Which means I should probably just– Go somewhere else now. Should I be sorry for my thoughts? I'd rather not, But still YO. Yo dude, what the fuck. I'VE BEEN STUCK IN THIS MOVIE FOR LIKE A YEAR. That's not that long… IT'S A LONG TIME TO BE IN A MOVIE. Please don't tear me to pieces; Don't blow the balloon up, No foul ball, No side eye No fowl play And dinner is as cold as it gets But dinner does warm In the aluminum foil, But all out of order, The border patrol is just Digging for details Digging for details. And it's this: You don't know what it is, Until you get into it, And it sets into you The only way it can When it's in you. Are you paying attention to this? Or can I just end it? Boston accents or what, And now i really think It's just inside my head It's just inside my head and This is getting weird. All of a sudden, I'm oh wonder and I love it And Sara Silverman has The prettiest brown eyes I've ever seen (on a celebrity) ((with whom I share a gender)) Aha. Okay, Sabrina Carpenter has a very pretty voice But that doesn't make me Any less jealous Or any less capable of explosion Disarm me I'm catching up on the specials I missed Being special I guess With no grocery subscription Aim low, Get high, I guess Rob Lowe, Build time, I guess I miss the old announcer, And the golden years I miss the former times And the mouse ears I learned my less I might got Kim K and TSwift Pointer Finger Could hold a tune to you, Who The joys of live theatre, And the catastrophe of the Impenetrable Boy oh boy is Television getting heavy Turn up the ridiculousness and Atrocious Atrocities and Acidophilus Anorexic, I wish i could digest this –and expand my vocabulary I wish I was better than I am So i could be Capable Can Kim Kardashian ever not just be Naturally beautiful at everything Doing everything Kim The J I can't sing in this apartment And it might actually kill me The devil lives next door on both sides I'm in a satan sandwich I guess I'm just Not free I must have fucked up last lifetime I must have fucked up last lifetime I might have looked just like her I want to get upstaged by Eddie Murphy More corpse suits! Pink lipstick! Slap the desk Check the camera Front loading! Front loading! I want a chance at humbling white america (just kidding) I want a wig that looks like an afro (cause I don't have one) I want Lorne Michaels to shame me into beng better By making me feel mediocre first So I hit the high bar When I hit the body bag I hit the body bag When I hit the high road With Letterman YOU STOLE MY BODY TO GO TO A BLACK TIE FUNCTION!? Yeah. Well–which one? Okay, you're gonna get a kick out of this. I'm giddy for physical comedy THIS IS MY MANIFEST DESTINY MY MANIFEST DESTINY AHHHHHHHH MY MANIFEST DESTINAAAAAAA Comedy comes in all forms And God comes in all Karma I brace myself for repeating my mantras I light candles But don't blow them out I just might get my wish DO NOT RESIST. I AM RESISTING THIS ARREST. Oh yeah. YES. Shoot him. NO, DON'T. SHOOT HIM, BILLY BOB, SHOOT ‘EM. Crocodile hunter turned hard-up cop Read him his rights! He ain't white enough. So she's perfect! Me? I've been taken in I can't stand to stamp I can't christmas, Backwards And backwash And sanford and sons And Whatever And… Ego might eat me like Eggos Like Hannibal Burress was holding At the market I left my Ego at the door But there's just no room for the both For the both of us I KNOW I'll just write her a hit show! What. YES. THEN, SHE'LL LEAVE SNL, AND THEN I'LL BE THE BLACK GIRL ON THE SHOW MWAAHAHAHAHAHA Ok. wtf happened to that girl? SUNNI BLU [kicking and screaming] I TOLD YOU I'M NOT GOING ON FA– —-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! So many beautiful people, or, rather The actors, Or should I say Vortex Then. Too many beautiful people I spent the whole night warm and holed up in the office What could come out of The Rock I don't know where to look I'm not used to the audience Duh, that. I'm a professional audience member But i don't remember the ending Anybody? Anybody? Any envy actor actress? BPM: Dosage Anxiety Remix Honestly fuck the comed circut I just want to know what it's like to have a body What's it like to have a body? I'm just a collective consciousness robot Adapting to my environment I can't sing in this apartment! I'm in a Satan Sandwich And would be The God in the middle If God didn't find this Absolutely hilarious So I'm on 24 hours; You're on Saturday Nights, But i'm on 24 I broke my Don't-look up-folks rule on Brittney Howard Cause I think i'm just like herBut more of a coward. You're on Saturday Night Live But i'm on 24 Hours It hurts longer And stronger Every moment I'm gone And still not a mom I wish I could change my eyes The color of the world Before it all ends Earth gone And oceans of mud No tide And no moon (The Earth without the Sun) I don't want to know you I don't want to owe you a lesson. I don't want to go there. I don't want no dance numbers. I don't want no GOATS here. No goats here. I don't get it, Mass Media– Is this flattery, or Deception? Humiliation? Based in perception, I see, so Is this recognition or Did I just send Dillon Francis my script in the beginning? No answer, by God. What an asshole What if Alienz Don't like lesbians. What is trance is just bad dance music. That's… What if edifice breaks for a daily regimen of Letterman? What if RUN, FALLON, RUN! I'M ATTACHED TO A KITE I HAVE NO CONTROL OF THIS. WELL, WHAT IS IT ATTACHED TO?! YOU DON'T WANNA KNOW! —NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONON AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Look, It's Meryl Streep! Holy shit, Meryl Streep is hot. What.(I can't keep secrets>) God doesn't keep good secrets. Just stop talking. Look, It's “My Bad Chad” Holyfuck Are you gonna have all those burned off too? Or can I do it for you? (might cost less) Jk Kim K That's a tough act to follow. Ariana? Nah, Backup; Had that. Meanwhile: Me in a hatchback Campin' at the Palisades. My name's the hammer –Adam ruins everything– I am not goin' starstruck –Adam Ruins Everything– My name's the Hammer (I'm a hammer, damn) –Adam Ruins Everything– I love showbiz But I got hard work comin on Now pause:: I need a break Need to make money Now i get a two for one Two for one Hate me or love me Either way, I'm gonna show up, Blow up, Glow up, And fuck off I'm a lost cause Cause I lost God On a talk show The way the camera moves makes me nauseous virtual reality And everybody's mad at me for Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy Conan “snowball” O'Brien But why's he called that. Shh! Not Yet. Oh, you are so overdone and fucked right now! Shh! My mom might be listening. Like she's never heard the word ‘fuck'? Shhhh! MOM I heard that! See! She said she heard it; she didn't say stop it. Well stop it. Fuck me man! SHH. KNOCK IT OFF. Yes Mrs. Mason Who the fuck is Mrs. Mason. Come on, white america; Put me on late night I promise you I'll watch more hallmark artists Than all of them Every day over here is a suit and tie function Camera one? YOU DONE FUCKED WITH US FOR THE LAST TIME. Ah shit. lol . whart is thrus. Fucking–magicians or something. Freemasons. F– Alright. Where is he? Where is who? You know who! What? Donaghey!!!!!!!! Lol Alec Baldin is like 200 years old. *cackles too hard, falls over and dies* Yikes. JACK DONAGHEY enters from a Parallel dimension and sees ALEC BALDWIN'S CORPSE. …Huh. Who's this handsome son of a bitch, I wonder. Don't wonder too hard. We gotta find that court order and get out of here. What court order [Cort hors d'oeuvres] what. I don't know. It almost kind of rhymed with corpse and wonder and I'm still stuck writing in cadences. What for! Oh wow, the neighbor was really a plant forreal. STOP SLAMMIN THAT Yo fuck this. Waht the fuck am I supposed to do with all this information. [appearing entirely out of nowhere, as always.] JIMMY FALLON I told you to burn it. OH MY FUCKING JESUS CHRIST. STOP DOING THAT. I can't. That's– Apparently what I do. WELL GET OUT OF HERE. Wish I could. Strapped to a kite. THEN HOW ARE YOU STANDING HERE? WHAT? I'm learning a lot of things up there! UP–WHERE! Up yours. WHAT. *poofs* UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I hate him. I HATE HIM. I HATE HIM. I hate this. TINA FEY Fuckit, he hates himself. Lets just assume. No, that's it. That's the singularity. What. It can't– He's just so confi— That's the singularity. [everything ploofs back to normal] See. I win. FUCK. ARE YOU SERIOUS!? I'M YOUNG AGAIN. i”M YOUNG AGAIN. [The entire cast stares at their returned to period-accurately aged cast mate; He appears so confident and wise, however–just a glint of insecurity falls over him–this indeed was the singularity; rather than to risk all of time and space defrabicating for a third and albeit final time, they rain down on their castmate, with the angry hellfire of a gregorian mob, urging him to GO LOVE YOURSELF. Long Night at work, or just Shoo fly, don't bother me– I'm more caught up on the Rudolph Storyline, How it's some mystic But I missed it With the lip stick And the vintage this and thats Person Welcome to Hogwarts, Of course, It's your funeral God bless the illuminati All I see is– NOT IT. IT WASN'T ME. I DIDN'T DO IT. JLO BITCH, STOP TALKING. Woah, What the FUCK JLO. JLO WHAT IN THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY? I–wh– Wait… Fallon? SHHHHThhHHHTHhhTHHHH!! Give me one bet Died inside Who's doing which thing God bless these envies! Gie me one shot Now who am I?Ace in the hole? I died inside. Don't break the barrier Don't run the wall Don't be the villain Fall, JImmy, Fall. To float, or to fall Or to walk away To shop at the mall Or to bet it all on Fall on And I tell you to jump, you jump! And I tell you to move, You move! And I tell you to movie, You movie! And I show you the blue OH GOD. Gimmie the binoculars! No, you don't wanna see What! Why not! HE MOONED ME. I got three of a kind Three of a kind Three of hearts Two of diamonds HAH. I DOn'T LiKE THIS. Fuck off, The Ace. And very kindly, Go fuck yourself. Four aces, Four aces A mindfuck for the both of us An open book And shotglasses And fans of ours Its good to laugh At the ones you love Love Love Love Love It's showbiz, It's showbiz; I love it I want to die. I love it I love it I missed the bar I fucked up somewhere. Don't look back in anger, Or don't look back at al. Fall, Fall, Fall Fall Fall Love Love Love Love Love Love Did you notice I haven't looked back. I put you up on a– Up on a Up on a pedestal Then remembered To forget it all, In indifference Foraged your signature Sorry, I don't want a lot of hawk-a-loogie clock-the-woman knockdown, dragout drama I got a feel for it. What if all your forfeitures were fortunes All your donuts turned subordinates To astronauts Or fake dreams for fak streams and dreaming of Don't bother me I'm on poverty I want walks on the beach and blue bunny ice cream sundaes I've got a whole city Marked off in my journal For frozen custard and Lost in a thought, are we? Trust me, I think I died. Trust me, I trusted the God of Mercy Trust me I went all the way to the burden, Bought a hammock And then worked harder than nobody No dropped calls from mother No one's home at all Work harder I thought Sweater Weather was my new DJ name, But as it turns out, It was my telepathy ringing me I rode to the top of the rock with the beatlesI didn't mean for it to be me But i was twice out of body, Once out of mind. Now give me a minute Please. Let me become indifferent Don't need no friends, Long roads Roundhouse kicks to the face Hard rolling baggage Heart shaped boxes Or Prophets Don't need dozens of roses don't need diamonds Do need dinosaursDo need phone numbers do Do do . –but don't– don't don't. When i fall in line I write books and poems, songs And suffer, slugger . This is what I struggled with– who paid the neighbor bitch to feed me the whole special And slam doors On my mental That shit struck a chord And rubbed me the wrong way But i'm humble I won't touch nobody's Body at all. Nobody's. Now my dreams make sense, kind of But why are these my dreams And not actual people and most of all What does it mean? That I'm equal to? Or lesser than? Like the emerald stone on Sir Paul McCartney's hand, I went green for a moment It's just banter.I'm just having a hard time (I can't sing in this apartment)I might need a band I might need a bandaid. I might need a bath Some peroxide and hair dye My heart's broken I'm having a hard time But still not struggling I might have a hard time But not as hard as the afterparty was, And I struck gold. Kept walking Roll dice. Four of a kind, Four kings, four aces Four of a kind, Four kites, And a night owl The Rock and the Kite, Part V STEFON It's this thing where… {Enter The Multiverse} –and that's why I wished my mom a happy birthday. [The Festival Project ™ ] Damn, the illuminati really showed out for the oscars this year. CONAN SHHHH. He even says “I Am” Then commands the stage Look at all those long legs Now we're on enclave or conclave? I don't know. I'm feeling more ravey. Tears of a Clown Nobody to save me Not even shug avery. Who? That's right? Now i'm feeling more Broadway, baby. L E G E N D S: Manifest Destiny I wanna see the snake sitting next to you; Show me those eyes I love models and the lack thereof Inside of them I want to see the feral reptile Show me those eyesI love that she flies through life Right to you Right It's a boys club Boy they Really prize these Chappel Roans and Timothee Chalemet But where am I at? –Adam Ruins Everything– A couple forced fake laughs Cause I like highlights Stagecrafts Craftservices And god knows I can't write like this And I'm About To die [CONAN O'BRIEN leaves television to run a Bed and Breakfast in ORLANDO.] INT. BED AND BREAKFAST. ORLANDO. … [Calamity ensues] Conan killed the oscars, Stole the wand, The show and the bowtie (hostses with the mostest) –and that's why he's Snowball. No, i'm sure it's because my fur is fluffy and– Okay no more outdated rick and morty references Fine. Was that Dillon Francis behind Ben Stiller Or do I still just like white guys That much. Why do A-Listers like reptiles so much? Show me those eyes, you know I could use a good lunch (Birds of Prey eat snakes) {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2018-2025 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.™ Episode Transcript: Yeah. Okay, this is terrifying. I haven't actually done this in it feels like way longer than it's been. In reality, it's only been like three like maybe three days, but it makes all the difference in the world. Hi. what's going on, I was just reminiscing about kitten mittens. Aw shit. I dropped my pen. If you remember if you're listening to this right now and you remember kittenman. congratulations, you've been with me since the beginning. um anyway, I don't know why I was just remembering that. kitten mittens. I thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world. I really I might have been delirious. losing my mind at a certain point, but I thought kittens was the best thing in the world. It was at the time. I was like I couldn't think of anything better. Then again, I was uh I don't know, I was discovering many hilarities. excuse the idiots in the back, they are idiots. um and they and they do this based on whatever I'm doing in my apartment. I'm their god. Anyway. I'm excused the background noise is still gonna be a a little bit uh while we're dealing with that, but at least you can help me collectively consciously remove them from existence entirely, um with the help of you know a collective existence we can get rid of evil. I don't I don't entirely. I'm not sure. I think that it would take a lot of people to understand that like a lot of it is just a game. I think it would take raising the entire consciousness of like people as a whole for them to understand that like, most of it is for entertainment and based off perceptions. So, like, whatever you' idea for the world is, like it was your idea. Whatever's making you upset is it was your idea. So I'm kind of coming to like terms with that in my own, like sense. I'm like, oh, yeah, like, whatever is happening, I'm like a certain like at the surface level is wrong, but like on a grander scale, like I programmed this into my reality for whatever purpose in order to better suit my, like ideal reality. That's, you know, that's that's it. I can't attribute it to anything else. They're idiots, cause I'm idiots. Anyway, what else is going on? I don't know, I was I'm gonna try and do this off book. I think I do have like I have some notes, but like I don't like the way that it feels when I'm going off of my notebook because it feels like robotic. It feels really, you know, like and not necessarily rehearsed, but it's it feels planned and when I listen back to the episodes where I do go off of like notes or something like that, I don't like the way that it sounds. Hearing myself back, going from a going going from like a script. And so I try to keep it like 100% improvisational and it keeps it fresh. and honestly, honesty goodness, I haven't been on the Peloton for like more than 15 minutes at a time since I stopped doing these episodes. I don't know what it is about the sound of my own voice, but maybe it's the fact that like, I'm in performance mode and I'm giving you guys like I'm in, you know, I'm like in my radio voice and then I'm watching back like a performance of myself in order to like, I don't know. It's like it's like experiencing myself for the first time secondhandedly because I'm not necessarily not thinking about what I'm saying, but I'm also not thinking about what what I'm saying or how I'm saying it as I'm saying it. And then, you know, sometimes I just really like even on my hardest days, sometimes I make myself laugh the very most, and I'm like, okay, there's another reason to keep doing it. Because for the most part, I'm like I don't wanna do this anymore, it costs me too much money and it's not. Like, I'm not a clut person. I'm just not a clout guy. I don't like doing stuff for clout, cause clout doesn't pay the bills and clout doesn't clout doesn't necessarily get you jobs, like unless it's like the right person's clout. Like, you get have clout from a million people, and if none of those million people are the well, a million is kind of where they drive line. Like if a million people are like, yeah, this is the shit, then it might get you a job. But like a million is probably the minimum number for that. Like if you don't have a million followers or you don't have a million views or you don't have a million of anything of just like clout like it doesn't pay bills. So I'm not a cloud person. I'm not just gonna do whatever off clout. What did I get off that on that clot rat for? I don't know, what was I saying? Oh, I'm going off book. I'm off. script. Anyway. what can I remember from things that I wrote down?, I don't know. I've been reading a lot. I've been, you know, doing doing the best that I can. I've been well, I've been reading. I've been reading children's books specifically because I'm finding information. Well, first of all, I picked up these children's books with the hope that I would be the owner of a small library and I'm not. I'm actually putting a lot of the books back into like society, which is fine. I'm just downsizing. It's actually helping me feel a lot better. Like my head is a lot clearer, my studio. My studio for for the first time in a long time was like a place that I can that I feel like I want to work. and it was the weirdest thing because I went through like a year of just like collecting whatever book I saw, like whether it was just like on a stoop, like I, you know, for whatever or out of the little free library or like just wherever, because books are everywhere in New York and that's probably my favorite thing hands down about New York is that like wherever you go there are books and they're free and you can pick them up. But I'm also very sensitive to energy, so as like an energy worker and a transmuter, it became congested to the point where it's like, okay, there is like a certain type of energy that's not that's foreign to me and as much cleansing and as much like, you know, whatever, as much, you know, in any kind of, you know, like spiritual work I was doing, there's an energy here that I'm not necessarily comfortable with. And I realized every time I picked up a book, I fell into like a certain type of world, you know, and it wasn't just like whether the book caught my attention from just like the cover or whatever, and then I decided to flip through it or whether it was like a book that I was stuck in, I was falling until like a certain energy or a certain world and that every book had a certain energy to it. And so I realized after a year of collecting hundreds of books that I had literally hundreds of energies, like floating through my space and it became like hectic and it became heavy to the point where I was like, like, I don't necessarily want to hold on to all these things. and so it's it's been really rejuvenating. I've been going through a time of just like not necessarily like I know I have a lot of stuff to do. but one of the stuff to do is is like going through all of the things that I know that I need to like let go of in order to feel better. And it has been helping me feel better. It has for the most part, I'm still doing a lot with like my energy recovery and the noise here has a lot to do with it. I'm now like I now have anxiety to the point where I have like a consistent nauseum. like every time I hear like any kind of motor, like I get sick and now it's it's actually getting worse the longer that I've stayed here with the noise, it's like I now have like an upset stomach all the time, headaches twitches. It's the it's the most fucked up thing ever. and I've also been learning more about because I'm, you know, still still really focused in my music and so frequencies and, you know, like I've always been like a huge believer and like layered frequencies for healing, like sound healing, beta thick alpha, and and the whatnot, but I finally caught onto a piece of information that made me realize how the noise outside has affected my brain chemistry and not just in the way that it's like it's annoying or it's a nuisance or it's harassment, which it is all of those things, according to the law, but in a sense of what's happening to my brain chemically, like the chemical changes that are happening in my brain, or the frequency changes that are happening in my brain are actually the things that are making me more upset than loss of sleep, or, you know, like a disruption or disorganization of my mind or my daily habits. The thing that's making me the most upset is what I'm realizing is it's changing my frequency, and I'm not talking about just my my aura I well, I am in a sense, but like the frequency, the frequency differences that that your brain your brain goes into different frequencies during, you know, waking state, alha state, better state, you know, and when you're sleeping, you're in um I well, it depends on the person actually, and it depends on the type of sleep that you're getting. Like most people sleep and like a data state from what I'm understanding and this is the state of like conscious dreaming. And this is this, I could be incorrect because honestly, I layer them anyway. And I finally I finally did it. I I did. I' I was working on a song and I realized that I achieved like perfect theta without actually even meaning to. And I think I did another one and that was like in perfect gamma without even like it was just mixed perfectly. that it I was also listening to like a gamatone and then I realized I was like, wait, is that the song or is it the tone? Because, you know, if the if the frequency that you're listening to is pure enough, it will actually distort the bass or the, you know, it will distort the entire sound of whatever you're listening to. So sometimes things can sound warped or like they're waving or like they're going through something because those tones are kind of like they're they're moving against each other or with each other just kind of depends. And so what what has been, well, I wanted to finish, well, yeah, I think I have at least one song now that's in theta, and I have at least one song that's in gamma, completely. and and I and I shocked myself because I was listening to the tones and I was like, wait, the wait a second. like, I'm feeling like double here. Is this this song that I'm listening to, that I'm checking back the mix, or is this the the frequencies? And I I turned off all the frequencies and sure enough, it was the song. It was like a pure I was like, wow. I'm like that's an achievement. I did it completely by accident and I wish I knew the formula that I used to do that.c some people are so mathematic about it. Like some people are so uh like, you know, some people do this to their music. A lot of people, especially inass music, that's why it is the way that it is, is you're going to a show to get these frequencies like zapped into your body at at full forces. and some people know how to do it on purpose. I did it on accident, so I'm like, if I can continue to achieve at this but I'm trying to figure out like the mathematical equation or like the actual sonic equation for making this happen, like every time, because going through my history ofass music, I will finish in a second, going through my history of bass music, I have always gravitated to the to these frequencies, to the frequencies that make me feel better after a certain amount of time listening to them or a certain amount of time being in in that frequency. So that's this is the music that has, I guess subconsciously kind of for the kind of artist that I am. But this is the reason why I'm upset about the noise. like the most upset about it, like not even on a legal level, on a social level, on a moral level, like, no, this is actually morally wrong, it is morally wrong on so many fucking levels. I'm like, why are you so like, why obviously I did this on purpose, like in my God complex, I'm like, oh, well, I can better the community as long as I make a point, like that environmentally, this is damaging people. It's giving people mental illness, that it or like if they're predisposed to mental illness, it's even worse, but it's it's also like causing mental illness and people that are otherwise healthy people, which is not a lot of people in New York City given. It's just not. It's not a healthy place. A lot of people are not healthy. But even in like moderately healthy humans, this noise disruption can cause like brain changes and chemistry changes, and this is the reason why I'm so upset is because when you are sleeping, if you are sleeping, your brain is in a certain level that is like in a healing state. In the first few minutes that you wake up, as I understand it. In the first few minutes after you wake up, your brain is in a state that it can like that you can manipulate your entire environment, that you can change things, that you can heal yourself. And so when I'm waking up in the first few minutes in the very first thing that I hear is a motorcycle that's ripping through my fucking brain, it's changing my brain frequency from a frequency that is like at the at the at a human level or at any kind of level, kind of the the thing that makes every human capable of being a genius, not the genius level able to heal yourself and the frequency that you're able to heal yourself is what you automatically wake up in. So when you' when this frequency is interrupted, it's intercepted in immediately into a negative thought pattern. And so you immediately, so what's happening, what's been happening to me over the last year with the motorcycle nuisance harassment problem or whatever the fuck I don't care what it's called on paper. I just want it to stop like I just want to live in peace. It's not like and kind of having like coming from a a background where I kind of tend to have like take responsibility for myself, like oh, it must be something that I'm doing and yes, I also have like a higher god complex or like an ego if you want to call it, that's like, oh no, I must have done this on purpose. And you know, like in order for the greater good, like in order to fulfill my purpose in some sort of way, it must be it must be part of my process to have this. That's also my ego like I'm a god. like, you know, that's just me, that's the generation. That's the generation that I come from. That's our mindset. Like nothing happens in this world without me in it, period. That's why rappers are rappers and that's why that's why models are models. We all have egos and it's really hard to kill the bitch. I've had at least ten ego dusts throughout my fucking like existence and it still comes back. It doesn't matter. You can have an ego death and be like a completely ego list for like what, six months tops? Eventually you're gonna have like the ego is is is imp important to survival, because I lost the word. I think implemental what was I gonna use? I was definitely a for syllable word. Either way, it is you need it. Like if you if you oh, you know, people might describe people, like being in like a in a sense of humility as like, oh, just completely without ego, but like at the end of the day, like, no, like your ego allows you to actually like compensate with the rest of the world, like, most people do not have no ego entirely, or at least for like, like a week after your acid tri or whatever, yeah, like, oh, had ego death and I completely. But like within I swear to God, like within six months time, like your ego has at least minimally like repaired itself. That's what an ego does, that's why you have it. You have it. It's a survival. It's it's a part of your consciousness that has to do with survival if you don't have your ego, like you're pretty much dead in the world, especially the way it is now. Anyway, this is that that's going to probably close up my spiel on that. Yeah, I'm upset because instead of like the first few moments of my waking moments being a healing, time, it is immediately going into disarray and chaos and anxiety. And so in in so I'm losing like, I don't I don't really care about oh, I mean, like I care about life in a sense, but I mean, like, and it in a mortal sense. I like, yes, it's taking years off of me. and I feel it like in the way that it's like, I I am slower to do regular things or like, whatever my rising thoughts, might be are completely just destroyed by this like what I've what I've come to perceive is like an evil force. It is evil in so many levels again this breaks down from like a higher consciousness to like a lower state of consciousness. The lower state of consciousness is saying that like these people are just idiots. They're idiots and they are not self aware of the fucking like pollution that they're doing on kind of middle sense, I'm like, oh, it's politics, it's like gentrification if these guys run around in circles, then people call up the fucking place, the place gets fucking more allocated funds to their fucking police officers, the police officers have fucking filling their quotas. It's all bureaucracy and paperwork and politics on that middle level and on the highest level it is like no, this is evil, it's pure evil because people are so grossed out by the fact that fucking New York is New York and also the wage and income and quality factor is that this guy is doing whatever the fuck he has to do brown. He's doing well, not that guy. that guy's that guy's a weak dick motherfucker. He has a small dick and everybody in the neighborhood knows it. He drives around and circle making people miserable. He also I'm it's the same dude. that same dude followed me to the Trader Joe's. It's the same dude, so I'm like, I like I know the sound of his bike from anything, so I definitely know when I'm at the Trader Joe's and then he's like all of a sudden traffic like, I'm like yo dude like why the fuck you following me to Trader Joe's like I live four miles away, which is not that far on the fucking motorcycle, but I came all the way over here on the subway for you to follow me on your bike. week, dick, bro.way, like, fuck this, fuck this, fuck that guy, fuck this neighborhood, fuck this place, fuck these politics, fuck these people. On a low frequency. Like on a low frequency, I'm like, fuck all this, like on a high frequency, I'm like, there's a purpose or whatever, it'll work, is temporary, blah, blah, blah. What the fuck was I saying? I don't know. I what the fuck was I ranting? I don't know. I that's that shiel, right? Trader Joe, hello Trader Joe. It's not safe. No, but you know, oh man, let's you say I, whatever. Let's just say oh, whatever. a lot. What else do we got? I don't know. I put on an album that came out today, yay, it's called all the rage. Actually, all that all that gripe about like, oh, it's an EP when I'm sure that the stores are gonna call it an album. I was like, I'm sure it's gonna be an album, so I just started calling it an album. like the release comes out and they're like, it's an EP, you congratulations. So I I thought I was putting out an album, that I was an EP, but it just missed the cutoff her album, because technically you can have a six track album and if it's over 30 minutes. If and you can have a six track album that's an EP like this, all the range is technically an EP at least according to Spotify's standards. And it's, I think it's like two and a half minutes under I think it's like 2 and a half minutes under, so it's an EP, but it's six tracks and I'm really excited about it. I kind of put a little bit more promotion into it than usual. I even had some press done, and that's great. because you can get pressed done. They're like,Yo, for $500. You'll be famous tomorrow. I'm like, that fucked up. That's a paycheck for some people. and that's not famous. also. They're charging people to be like spectacular. Well, they're charging they're like charging for people to be like popular, which is I think it's wrong, like ethically, you shouldn't be able to do that, like, oh, no, you're gonna get on all the playlists and whatever, you're gonna have like all like you should not be able to sell followers, like whether they're real people, which is slavery or they're robots, which is also slavery. Like you should not be able to sell fame that's making it like now I don't even trust like, okay, like this person got an award, but like, okay, because because the album was popular, because it was better than all the other ones. Or like, how do you know that you even heard all the albums because there are so many, and that like, okay, this person who put like zero dollars into promotion, how do you know that album wasn't better? because you didn't hear it? Because the person with a million dollar ad campaign won the fucking won the fucking award? Because you heard it because they put a million dollars into the fucking promotions. So it makes it makes everything the fact that everything is on a level system that's based on money is completely unfair. Like the all the industries are broken, it's not just music. Like, it's not just music. I'm like, holy shit, like you could spend like a year, an average year salary, which is what's the median income now. even with like no adjustment for inflation, like what, $50,000? Okay. So you could spend $50,000 on your your career so you'd have to you'd have to do that. That's even you're still competing with people who have a million dollars for doing nothing. That's insane. Anyway, I'm not bitter. What the fuck did I do earlier that I wasn't that literally the spirit that was like, don't be salty. I was like, oh, I was like,Yo, stop teaching models to fucking DJ, because I I happened on this girl that was like, yo, like I actually liked some of her music. I liked some of her music, but she wasn't doing much. And like everything was just fake. It was like super duper fake, but she was mad gorgeous and like more of these girls are popping up out of nowhere that are like not they're like models that are barely touching the decks and they're like a march. I'm like yo, dude, if that girl made this music like okay, maybe I should see her, but like, I'm like no somebody goes produce this because like she's moving badly in time to it and I realized something about being a producer is like yo if you spent enough time actually crafting this like this piece, you're not gonna move like badly to it like you're not going to move weird to music that you made because it's in you like it came from in your body. So like, I was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm looking at and I'm like, oh, I'm looking at propaganda. But then like, isn't that just kind of like discouraging people who don't have that type of body type or mindset, but it was funny because the algorithm was like don't be salty. It was like DJing is for everybody and if that's your passion and I'm like yeah, if that's your passion, but like, yo, when what where is the line between like propaganda and passion? Like, oh, I'm already a successful like, multimillionaire fashion model, but like I'm gonna be a DJ, like it washes out all the people who have actually like put in the work. It washes out all the people who have actually put in the work. Don't be salty. I was like fine, fine, but only because I like that algorithm. Only because I like that algorithm. I'm like fine, okay, we'll we'll be whatever. Whatever I've been reading. Oh, I read a book, let's see, let's see if I can remember the ones I already put back. I've been reading these uh this like children's book series on like famous people because I realized that they're written for children and I'm like, yo, dude, like somebody could read this whole series in the second grade and be smarter than me because I didn't know anything about the people that I'm reading about at all. And so they're like these little biographies. Well, I mean, they they're on a child's level. I don't know how long it would take a child to read, but they take me like an hour, hour and a half to read just like at a normal speed. And I read really fast. But I think the reason why from taking me so long to read them is because I actually take like a lot of I take a lot of like, I don't know, words or art to me, so if something is like especially musical, I might take it and be like that's a good song title. Like, if I think enough about this and what I know about this, like what kind of song is it? And, you know, just like little fun facts. Like first of all, I'm obsessed with George Lucas. I've never been a huge Star Wars person, just and I I realizing this. I've never been being on like Star Wars wicked. like, I've never been being on things that are like really, really big, but then I did grow up and kind of like a sheltered shut community where like most of the people like twilight, I wasn't hungerames, aylys Cyrus, well Hannah Montana at the time, okay? I just wasn't into those things, but most mostly because they're fans, actually, she just put out something that I kind of piqued my interest. It was in my fucking sl side bar. I was like, oh, no, what's this? I'm I might check it out. But I've been staying off the mainstream just cause I'm realizing like the reason that I'm seeing this is money and doesn't necessarily make it better or worse than anybody else. Because sometimes mainstream artists come out with crap and I think they do it on purpose, they're like,Yo, watch this. I can do whatever because so many millions of people love me, watch this. I'm like, damn. And then millions of people are like, yay, yes, yes, this. I'm like, the fuck? What did you do? And I'm pretty sure the mainstream artist is like consciously, even collectively like, you see what I'm saying? I can do whatever the fuck.c I did one thing cool, maybe like five things cool, like a long time ago, and literally don't have to do anything else. I just do this just to prove a poil. Like, I can shit on a track, literally. And millions of people will be like, I love you. I love you, please more of those. do it again. I'm like, oh, God, please, no. What the fuck? Millions of fans. Like once you have your fucking fan based unlock, like that's it. Like, you don't have to fucking people will be like, literally kissing at all of the ground that you touch for the rest of forever forever. That's it. I'm realizing that about fantom, so I'm like, yo, if you know what kitten mittens are. I'd still don't, but if you if you know kitten mittens, congrats, you're one of 12 people who actually like me. one of 12. I'm like 12 is enough. That's what Jesus had, right? might as well and Jesus technically have like 11 I don't know why I like that guy so much. I'm pretty much obsessed with him, too. I love Jesus. I'm like, Jesus is the god kind of I mean, like he's technically like three gods. anyway, why am I obsessed with uh George Lucas? First of all, he's one of the coolest people ever, Kate, like, okay, first he was a greaser, like a real greaser. like from the movie Grease, but like the actual thing before the movie Grease, cause if I if I'm not mistaken, he was like a greaser before they made Grease. That's crazy. Yeah, because Gre was like in the 70s, but it was about the 50s, right? I don't know. He was like an actual real life, like they just put Vaseline, I guess in their hair and wore like dirty shit and they were like, yeaheah, greaser. and they w and they fucking drove and they drove, what did they drive? I don't know, cars, old cars, and they would race them. I that was honestly I'm obsessed with this dude. I and now I kind of want to see Star Wars because I've never seen them. But honestly Star Wars is one of those things that, oh, that's what I was saying. God, yeah, well, yeah, I like grew up not liking Star Wars because all the people that liked it were mean. Like all those other things I named earlier in the episode. Like they're fans sucked, so I was like, I definitely cannot see myself getting into this. And so I never did, but now I'm well, as happy as I am being single. I save certain things for like just a case. I ever get in a relationship. I'm like Star Wars. I've never seen that. Like I saved certain things for like you know, like I wouldn't necessarily want to watch it by myself. I think I'd get geeked, though, now, now that I understand, like the kind of person that created Star Wars, I'm like, yo, dude, like he's the shit. Like, okay, first of all, okay, if I did the math, secondly, no, cause the first of all thing was like, he's a greaser. That's the coolest thing about George Lucas. Yeah. I mean, like I mean, like there was so many cool things. I had to take notes, I had to stop. I was like bending back pages, I was like, all this dude's the best. Okay. I was like,Yo, okay, whatever. Like, uh, oh, well, that was one of the last things I read. If I did the math right, this dude has like a 12 year old. He's older than my dad. My dad's pushing 80. I'm like, is he 80? He's like 80 with a 12 year old. That's incredible. That's I have so much respected admiration for that. Because it kind of proves my point that like if you're dude, you can just like keep on popping them out, popping them out. But he also like adopted kids, I think. Yeah, yeah. And he also like adopted kids. was at him? Yeah. Yo, I'm telling you there's so much practice into these little books. I'm like, okay, whatever, what else is cool. I don't know, he just seems he just seems like the dude just seems like the dude. I was likeYo. I I can't remember all the notes I took, but those those two things alone. I'm like, yeah, I earn my respect. I did write down a quote earlier that was like, what did he used to say? oh, do that again but better? I'm like, yeah, that sounds that sounds accurate. And then I liked the fact that like all his worlds within his worlds are like connected, so he'll leave Easter eggs within worlds of different Indiana Smith. He really liked the name Indiana because I guess he had a dog named Indiana, which was named after somebody else that was named Indiana. And I had no idea that Indiana Jones was like his brainchild or like close to it. I was like, whoa, this dudees are fucking legend, like a real like an actual, like this dude's a G for George Lucas. He's the best. I was like, yeah, dude. I could not put that book down. I was like sitting in cold bathtub water like, oh my God, this is such a pain turner. I gotta read about this dude until the very end of this book and I did. I would not put it down. I was like, George Lucas is the man, bro. like the man, I don't like like, yo, cool dude. I like that guy. I've never seen Star Wars. I have, I've seen like the beginning. It's like in the time, blah, fucking blah, blah, fucking talk. Yeah, and then I started writing my own movies, you know. It's not that any of them, you know, as whatever, you know, sometimes it's circumstance, sometimes sometimes I' just realize that I make excuses. Like I have no reason not to be as successful as any of these people that I'm reading about, because I'm finding personality traits about myself as I'm reading about them, like Albert Einstein Total Duis. He might have been like like functionally retarded. I'm pretty sure he was retarded, but also a genius. Like like, oh, okay, this is the coolest thing about Albert Einstein are we done inukas never, never. He's immortal, right? We'll see him at some point. He's so cool. He's so cool anyway. I was like, yeah, dude, this dude is cool. But there's that's the Alb Einstein, my man, okay, so like, slowly almost solely responsible for the invention of the Adamah. That's dope. On accident, though, because once he realized what had like once he realized that, okay, like, okay, I'm correct about this. For sure, I'm definitely correct about this, but like, yo okay, should we back up a little bit? First of all, he didn't say anything until he was like four. Didn't say anything, not a not a single word, his parents were like,o, something's wrong with him. Like even back in the day where it's like, uh don't know. Something's wrong with him. He's not saying anything. The doctors were like, he's perfectly fine.'s fine. And he didn't say anything his entire life until one day, apparently, he sat down to dinner with his parents and the soup was too hot, and that's what he said he's like the soup is too hot. Like, could you imagine, like having a kid that you're like 100% sure is retarded? Oops, nope, you can't say that. Okay, well, you could. Then so let's just shouldn't I just cancel you can't say that. Why, though? Like, okay, when I was growing up, you have to understand I come from a time where it was like you could just call that to somebody cause they were being dumb, but not dumb, right? But I mean like at a certain point, like, okay, technically Helen Keller was deaf dumb and blind, but like sometime and I'm assuming like between the 70s and 80s, it became a slang for like that's dumb. Like, don't do that because whatever you're doing is not right, which is like, okay if you're not right, then you're what? Retarded. Like, I'm sorry. I'm like some certain things are not going to be like, I'm, you know. I'm like early 2000s game or culture, that's gay, but I love gay. It's like nobody's being derogatory about that. I'm being derogatory about your behavior and I might even use it as like a positive you know what's what describing words or adjectives? I don't know. I'm going through. I'm going to processes realizing that like, okay, I'm at the age where certain information is gonna be offloaded. Certain like it's not coming back ever. Like, you like, I I know Spanish, but only if I have to speak it and it's not like, I'm not developing any other nothing else is like my brain is like, we don't need this, do we? I'm like, I don't know. Maybe I should hold on to that. No, no, we don't need this. I'm like, okay, well. there are certain things about me that are just not gonna change at this point. I'm not sorry, because honestly, weren't too offended at everything when, like, there're there are things that are offensive that nobody really is offended about. like, if you really found an offensive, it would not exist anymore, you know? Because when somebody becomes really passionate about something, and they change it. Which is why I'm taking my time. I like, youo, annihilation is imminent. Like this cannot be anymore. Like, you don't change my brain chemistry. Fuck that shit. my brain chemistry is perfect the way that it is. Like I'm almost sure that like the entire mental health industry will change based on ideals that are like blooming and other like in other what the fuck was I just saying exactly ideas that are already springing up in in small circles. like they'll, you know, be one day. Like that's just valid, like nothing's really wrong with you. something's wrong with the world. Like, why? Like, and what can we do to change that? It could be environmental completely. It could take somebody with like severe mental health issues, severe schizophrenia, severe bipolar disorder, severe fucking severe depression, severe anxiety and change their environmental factors or even just like change the fact that that like they're facing poverty, poverty is a mental illness and that's not what it's not looked at as such. It's looked at as a deficiency on the individual's part when it could be like and it could be a polethro of environmental factors. That'll change. It will in my lifetime. I know that it will. It may not be because of me because for the most part, I'm a pacifist. I really am. I'm a yoder, like, honestly, it has to be like visibly hurting someone else or hurting me painfully enough for me to be passionate about it to make it change. Like, I'm sorry, I'm not. I don't want I don't really want to be a leader, especially because like people are still like populating this planet. I don't necessarily I don't I don't wanna be like a a leader in anything because that is like that's too much power. Honestly, just let me play the music and then fuck off. And I will fuck off. Like if you think I talk too much or you find me annoying or you think I'm stupid like eventually I I disappear. That's it a self-reflective Go away, all right. I't have to be asked twice. I don't stay in places where I'm not welcome. So, New York it's been good. Are't not really. But somebody I thought okay, who else am I obsessed with? I love this new lady that I found. Her name is Gina something rather fucking amazing. I I love New York people because I love New York people. Like I really do. like it is well, it's hard to fucking there's a fucking oh, honestly, it could be simplified to this as like, okay, maybe this embraces like the new the New York feminine and what I really hate is the New York masculine, which is just toxic, just disgusting, like where I spinning on things, shut the fuck up, like, are you not self aware? Like it's it's certain level of and I'm not, I'm really not binary in the sense where it's like balanc, bro. like balance, like a little bit of everything is good and like half masculine, half feminine is like a good balance, non-binary embracing that. But like yo, dude, there's a certain rasculinity about the city that's the thing that makes it nasty. It was like, whoa. whoa. I'm like, that's nasty, but I was oh, okay, I'm in love with this person. Her name is like Gene or something rather. I'm still I still have like I no, I have no feet in the comedy pool cause like I realized I stopped performing comedy and I stopped writing it, and like all the like semi tragic possibility, like possibly hilarious situations that were happening to me when I was actively writing comedy just stopped. I was like good, I don't necessarily need to be in that right now. That's that has sailed and will probably later sink, but I don't want to be in there if like, okay, like you're funny, if like sad and bad shit happens to you all the time. I'm like, that's fucked up. I don't wanna be that guyc 50 years from now I could be that guy and like still not earn a penny more than I'm earning right now making music underground. So if it's if I had to choose between the two, I've already earned mastery in recording arts. 10,000 hours or more, like I don't necessarily like being a comic is like another ladder. It's another it's a thing. And honestly, when I stopped like, well, I mean, like I I took a break from tears of a clown because it became such a like passion project for me that I was like, oh, this is that I'm caring too much like I should stop. and still not finish and it's not it's not like, it never had a release date in mind, so it's not necessarily like what's it delayed? Yeah, it's not delayed, and it's not it's definitely not in hiatus, but like, I realized that I have a certain responsibility to my audience altogether. It like to do this show as well and so like this, there's been taking kind of a priority, knowing that like my hiatus has been longer than any other hiatus is, and that I owe it to like my homegrown audience and my weird coat following to like okay like I have to give you guys everything from fucking like November to now and just musically that's a lot but then I've also the writing has also accompanied it and so it would be a shame to just let that go entirely because I feel that like my actual, my actual fan base is here in this show, unfortunately, well, not unfortunately, because I've started to get like a sense of familiarity within the dance music scene, like, as a producer through this podcast as a medium, because when I started doing this podcast, like, it wasn't like people weren't generally like now people are doing like following my, what's it? format. Like people weren't really doing DJ mixes and like putting music on podcasts, like it just wasn't people weren't doing it. I was the only one doing it now everybody's doing it and it makes me want to do it less, but then also like I have to kind of show consistency with myself in order for me to feel like I'm still doing something. What was that rant about? I don't know. I'm obsessed with this lady name's Gina or something rather. She's super New York. What would she say? that I really liked? Oh, if you didn't know the rules before you got to New York, you you like if you came to New York and you're not having a good time, you probably didn't know the rules before you got here.rect. I didn't come here on purpose. This was my layover city. I came here by accident and I did not know the rules. Now I'm learning the rules and I'm like the rules are fucked up and rules are kind of meant to be broken if you're disturbing my peace, I will then disturb your peace. No, I will not. I do not believe an eye for an eye, and also I feel that you are dangerous people. I will then report you to the police and and make the proper documentation in order for it to stop. I'm a snitch. I don't give a fuck. Like if you're actually hurting me, like if you're changing my the way that I think and the way that I feel, like if you're making me sick inside of my own environment, like you deserve it. I'll give a fuck. I don't give a fuck. I don't give any kind of fuck. And then that way, I am a feminist, cause it's like, yo, dude, like how long are you gonna sit and take somebody hurting you before you actually realize that like you're not the problem they are and in order for their behavior to stop, you have to actually like you have to prevent this by stepping up for yourself. It's kind of like a show and like, okay, like like at a certain point it is kind of like a game. Like how long are you going to let me do this to you before you just fucking like get up and fucking hit me back? And I'm like, I don't want to like, I don't want to fight, but at the same time, like, bro, like I've been getting my ass whipped by these idiots and so I'm like, okay, I have to actually, but I'm still not a fighter. I have to do it in a way that makes sense and so that the community can be improved when I move on. Like I don't necessarily want to put somebody in the same place that I am now because I really am not I don't and just improve it. Like I believe so much in doing that, like not just leaving no trace, but like improving the place from which you are situated when you leave so that when the next person comes through, they don't have to struggle through the same hardship. So in that way, leadership, sure, be

[A beautiful dog enters the palace; C'esme't is pleased—actually, more thrilled.] Now! (Yo!) [The Dog sits at the entrance.] Call to me. [he speaks from the mind (telepathically) with a familiar tonal voice] Come, sweet stranger! [The Dog approaches] For it is I, the King who walks as not a ghost For yet the call has spoken that I be your loyal shadow (it's me; the King. I've been called to watch over you) Then? (Elaborate.) For now I came as waked dost I as ghost and wandered, pity and pardoned by no army dared Aghast my throne And agape my eyes, Wide my mouth and nostrils, Disemboweled and yet, I did wake with my fortune And tidings in my kingdom, a hidden realm, For there slayed, as I wept, The others dared to swallow, This truth, I, as knight and pawn doth slay the Queen, For titled King no friend of mine; And now, this beast as blood dost froth, My mind does waste, but here I bark Fortunate! To be laid by as you, I will. Then, creature, as you may! For free, this I, And coming not the time I shall l awaken, And then, though, Does the true challenge to bear, The altar; the stone, the shield and the rope From which I pull, and thee shall fight. Marriage of souls. To fancy this beast, betrayeth not. For something barks as is an end As a man does call a lover friend And so lover-friend I am and shall be. Lol what the fuck. So he's a dog now. ‍♀️ wtf is going on in this show. Idk. I'm baked. Enter The Multiverse L E G E N D S: Manifest Destiny ‍♂️ Ascension: Enter the Multiverse The titles switched. Good idea. So maybe I should stick with t mobile? Idk. Mint mobile is 15 dollars a month for unlimited talk and text. HERE AND NOW I DECREE, THIS FEAST DOES NOURISH ALL OUR MINDS AND HEARTS TO FIGHT THE GOOD WAR AGAINST ALL HE WHO SQUANDER THE MERCY OF PEACE! TO COURAGE! lol you lost me. I'm grasping at strings here. I needs a means to an end I need a body bag, body bag I need a King and a dog And a cat and an owl And a mark and a dawn And a knife and a gun Call it what you want I was not at the rock But that's where I was going I'm lost in Omaha I was just on the dark With the dark and the walkers The king and the rabbit The facts and the stalkers But who sunk the boat? Who sunk the boat Now this is encouragement! Acknowledgements? Nothing yet. Disaster strikes obvious and No regrets But obvious I'm in it for the long run And it transpired for the job done But the waffles came out awful And crispier than I wanted Almost every time So I took the iron back to target And I know I came out with a double album in August But I got no promotions So I won't walk the carpet So I won't walk the carpet I know I know I'm no Joan Rivers Or Joan of ark so I won't talk the gossip I won't talk the gossip I won't talk the gossip Now, more followers Show boat, Throw him overboard into a rowboat With no paddles And horseshoes on em— That outta show ‘em Rondevouz Rob us all Noah's Ark Don't get so lost in the story Lost in the sory Lost in the LORNE MICHAELS …you caused this. [In a secret lab inside of 30 Rock, A group of SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE alumni are trapped inside a metal box; this room has no doors and no windows and seems to be amplifying thought frequencies each of them hears uniquely, but distinctly, and very, very loudly. This is due to the irrefutable fact that they are all gifted telepaths, due to having served time often looking into the lenses of live broadcast cameras. it is theorized that, because of this anomaly— a strange and untraceable signal seeming to intercept all of Rockefeller Plaza's Radio antennae transmissions, it may be an unknown extraterrestrial force attempting to comminicste with 30 Rock from space. On this day, they've been gathered and trapped here in an emergency focus group to attempt to remedy the problem. Haha. MAKE IT STOP. OH MY GOD WHAT IS THST, WHYYYYYYYYY! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYHY!!! Craters full of lullabies and dictionary definitions; Tense intimate interactions, and now, this hypertension. I have a secret, a dirty little secret. I didn't do it! It wasn't me! Hmm..okay–vouch. I'm telling you–wait– vouch? Yeah, I vouch. You're vouching me? I'm vouching you. She's vouching me. She vouched you. So i'm good? You're good. I'm good. You're good. Ok. SETH MEYERS is the best secret keeper in the entirety of the known and unknown multiverse. The respective deities and entities within the outer realms have taken notice to this; One of the world's greatest eve played game has become the ritualistic endeavor of tracking down this human in order to attempt to overwhelm him so that he might eventually crack or implode, or even acknowledge these sometimes outrageous events and otherworldly happenings; thus far, he has not. As of recently, the elders of the darkest deities from the furthest outer realms and legions of Hell have been taking this game with the now very famous and successful seth meyers, a popular TV host; this has elevated the e ntirety of the threshold for Seth's tolerance, and it appears he may soon be pushed to crack. So why are you on the wire? I atrophied at extravagant Tip toed in the tip ties; Til' then, i went there, Now summer starts in winter Now summer starts in winter Now summer starts in winter Pull the curtain back, Then you censor this Censor this! I pull the curtain back, then redact then redact don't react don't react It's an act it's an act Shit I pull the curtain back then I bow; It's a show now Pull the curtain back then I show, It's a showdown Listen up, Listen down I super blow my flow now, super bowl my pronouns You can't lose if you don't pick a team You can't win if you don't even play I can't pay you if I don't get a paycheck I can't work at it if it's not fame Oh no! I can't work at it if it's not fame. The isms is the synthesis; I only got one present for christmas When you [can] Take that spark and bury it in your heart, don't remark about it– Then, probably you're a comic Or an alcoholic, one of the two of them Wrong not to touch, then Willed you back into existence And still it's in exigence, and Guilty by association Guilty by association I just want to know what the current Tonight Show budget is for hair dye. Also wondering why JImmy's suit is grey, but his hair isn't? Is that a two in one? Honest to God my only question about this man. The rest can remain as mystery. Act V Part II Guilty By Association Sometimes I Stevie Wonder what you're up to; I can't see you but I know you're in my aura Sometimes I Richard Pryor while you're on my mind; I guess you could say you set my soul on fire My, my my Look what time it is I've only just begun to know you; Then I had to dieSo turn the light off My eye Turn the light off for awhile And follow me to darkness Follow me To the other side. It's not true, but it'll do I might have lost you somewhere Better off to leave you somewhere sure; If it's not pure And how could it be When only the light hits the snow And bounces off The warmth is an illusion, And your love is just a dream And anyway, anyway There's nothing i've ever been surer of Than the definite end, The enter and exit And when planets align, Only to fall completely out of orbit Now what was this for again Foreigner, object identified and destroyed it's destructive qualities, Tentative in a nature Sure, pressure– Resentment, Intense good moments of pleasure, Then signals sent Completely by accident. -Now that i've been thinking lately of Bill Murray And my formerly imaginary friend Riff Raff, Now i'm sure that There may be some telepathy involved Which means I should probably just– Go somewhere else now. Should I be sorry for my thoughts? I'd rather not, But still YO. Yo dude, what the fuck. I'VE BEEN STUCK IN THIS MOVIE FOR LIKE A YEAR. That's not that long… IT'S A LONG TIME TO BE IN A MOVIE. Please don't tear me to pieces; Don't blow the balloon up, No foul ball, No side eye No fowl play And dinner is as cold as it gets But dinner does warm In the aluminum foil, But all out of order, The border patrol is just Digging for details Digging for details. And it's this: You don't know what it is, Until you get into it, And it sets into you The only way it can When it's in you. Are you paying attention to this? Or can I just end it? Boston accents or what, And now i really think It's just inside my head It's just inside my head and This is getting weird. All of a sudden, I'm oh wonder and I love it And Sara Silverman has The prettiest brown eyes I've ever seen (on a celebrity) ((with whom I share a gender)) Aha. Okay, Sabrina Carpenter has a very pretty voice But that doesn't make me Any less jealous Or any less capable of explosion Disarm me I'm catching up on the specials I missed Being special I guess With no grocery subscription Aim low, Get high, I guess Rob Lowe, Build time, I guess I miss the old announcer, And the golden years I miss the former times And the mouse ears I learned my less I might got Kim K and TSwift Pointer Finger Could hold a tune to you, Who The joys of live theatre, And the catastrophe of the Impenetrable Boy oh boy is Television getting heavy Turn up the ridiculousness and Atrocious Atrocities and Acidophilus Anorexic, I wish i could digest this –and expand my vocabulary I wish I was better than I am So i could be Capable Can Kim Kardashian ever not just be Naturally beautiful at everything Doing everything Kim The J I can't sing in this apartment And it might actually kill me The devil lives next door on both sides I'm in a satan sandwich I guess I'm just Not free I must have fucked up last lifetime I must have fucked up last lifetime I might have looked just like her I want to get upstaged by Eddie Murphy More corpse suits! Pink lipstick! Slap the desk Check the camera Front loading! Front loading! I want a chance at humbling white america (just kidding) I want a wig that looks like an afro (cause I don't have one) I want Lorne Michaels to shame me into beng better By making me feel mediocre first So I hit the high bar When I hit the body bag I hit the body bag When I hit the high road With Letterman YOU STOLE MY BODY TO GO TO A BLACK TIE FUNCTION!? Yeah. Well–which one? Okay, you're gonna get a kick out of this. I'm giddy for physical comedy THIS IS MY MANIFEST DESTINY MY MANIFEST DESTINY AHHHHHHHH MY MANIFEST DESTINAAAAAAA Comedy comes in all forms And God comes in all Karma I brace myself for repeating my mantras I light candles But don't blow them out I just might get my wish DO NOT RESIST. I AM RESISTING THIS ARREST. Oh yeah. YES. Shoot him. NO, DON'T. SHOOT HIM, BILLY BOB, SHOOT ‘EM. Crocodile hunter turned hard-up cop Read him his rights! He ain't white enough. So she's perfect! Me? I've been taken in I can't stand to stamp I can't christmas, Backwards And backwash And sanford and sons And Whatever And… Ego might eat me like Eggos Like Hannibal Burress was holding At the market I left my Ego at the door But there's just no room for the both For the both of us I KNOW I'll just write her a hit show! What. YES. THEN, SHE'LL LEAVE SNL, AND THEN I'LL BE THE BLACK GIRL ON THE SHOW MWAAHAHAHAHAHA Ok. wtf happened to that girl? SUNNI BLU [kicking and screaming] I TOLD YOU I'M NOT GOING ON FA– —-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! So many beautiful people, or, rather The actors, Or should I say Vortex Then. Too many beautiful people I spent the whole night warm and holed up in the office What could come out of The Rock I don't know where to look I'm not used to the audience Duh, that. I'm a professional audience member But i don't remember the ending Anybody? Anybody? Any envy actor actress? BPM: Dosage Anxiety Remix Honestly fuck the comed circut I just want to know what it's like to have a body What's it like to have a body? I'm just a collective consciousness robot Adapting to my environment I can't sing in this apartment! I'm in a Satan Sandwich And would be The God in the middle If God didn't find this Absolutely hilarious So I'm on 24 hours; You're on Saturday Nights, But i'm on 24 I broke my Don't-look up-folks rule on Brittney Howard Cause I think i'm just like herBut more of a coward. You're on Saturday Night Live But i'm on 24 Hours It hurts longer And stronger Every moment I'm gone And still not a mom I wish I could change my eyes The color of the world Before it all ends Earth gone And oceans of mud No tide And no moon (The Earth without the Sun) I don't want to know you I don't want to owe you a lesson. I don't want to go there. I don't want no dance numbers. I don't want no GOATS here. No goats here. I don't get it, Mass Media– Is this flattery, or Deception? Humiliation? Based in perception, I see, so Is this recognition or Did I just send Dillon Francis my script in the beginning? No answer, by God. What an asshole What if Alienz Don't like lesbians. What is trance is just bad dance music. That's… What if edifice breaks for a daily regimen of Letterman? What if RUN, FALLON, RUN! I'M ATTACHED TO A KITE I HAVE NO CONTROL OF THIS. WELL, WHAT IS IT ATTACHED TO?! YOU DON'T WANNA KNOW! —NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONON AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Look, It's Meryl Streep! Holy shit, Meryl Streep is hot. What.(I can't keep secrets>) God doesn't keep good secrets. Just stop talking. Look, It's “My Bad Chad” Holyfuck Are you gonna have all those burned off too? Or can I do it for you? (might cost less) Jk Kim K That's a tough act to follow. Ariana? Nah, Backup; Had that. Meanwhile: Me in a hatchback Campin' at the Palisades. My name's the hammer –Adam ruins everything– I am not goin' starstruck –Adam Ruins Everything– My name's the Hammer (I'm a hammer, damn) –Adam Ruins Everything– I love showbiz But I got hard work comin on Now pause:: I need a break Need to make money Now i get a two for one Two for one Hate me or love me Either way, I'm gonna show up, Blow up, Glow up, And fuck off I'm a lost cause Cause I lost God On a talk show The way the camera moves makes me nauseous virtual reality And everybody's mad at me for Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy Conan “snowball” O'Brien But why's he called that. Shh! Not Yet. Oh, you are so overdone and fucked right now! Shh! My mom might be listening. Like she's never heard the word ‘fuck'? Shhhh! MOM I heard that! See! She said she heard it; she didn't say stop it. Well stop it. Fuck me man! SHH. KNOCK IT OFF. Yes Mrs. Mason Who the fuck is Mrs. Mason. Come on, white america; Put me on late night I promise you I'll watch more hallmark artists Than all of them Every day over here is a suit and tie function Camera one? YOU DONE FUCKED WITH US FOR THE LAST TIME. Ah shit. lol . whart is thrus. Fucking–magicians or something. Freemasons. F– Alright. Where is he? Where is who? You know who! What? Donaghey!!!!!!!! Lol Alec Baldin is like 200 years old. *cackles too hard, falls over and dies* Yikes. JACK DONAGHEY enters from a Parallel dimension and sees ALEC BALDWIN'S CORPSE. …Huh. Who's this handsome son of a bitch, I wonder. Don't wonder too hard. We gotta find that court order and get out of here. What court order [Cort hors d'oeuvres] what. I don't know. It almost kind of rhymed with corpse and wonder and I'm still stuck writing in cadences. What for! Oh wow, the neighbor was really a plant forreal. STOP SLAMMIN THAT Yo fuck this. Waht the fuck am I supposed to do with all this information. [appearing entirely out of nowhere, as always.] JIMMY FALLON I told you to burn it. OH MY FUCKING JESUS CHRIST. STOP DOING THAT. I can't. That's– Apparently what I do. WELL GET OUT OF HERE. Wish I could. Strapped to a kite. THEN HOW ARE YOU STANDING HERE? WHAT? I'm learning a lot of things up there! UP–WHERE! Up yours. WHAT. *poofs* UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I hate him. I HATE HIM. I HATE HIM. I hate this. TINA FEY Fuckit, he hates himself. Lets just assume. No, that's it. That's the singularity. What. It can't– He's just so confi— That's the singularity. [everything ploofs back to normal] See. I win. FUCK. ARE YOU SERIOUS!? I'M YOUNG AGAIN. i”M YOUNG AGAIN. [The entire cast stares at their returned to period-accurately aged cast mate; He appears so confident and wise, however–just a glint of insecurity falls over him–this indeed was the singularity; rather than to risk all of time and space defrabicating for a third and albeit final time, they rain down on their castmate, with the angry hellfire of a gregorian mob, urging him to GO LOVE YOURSELF. Long Night at work, or just Shoo fly, don't bother me– I'm more caught up on the Rudolph Storyline, How it's some mystic But I missed it With the lip stick And the vintage this and thats Person Welcome to Hogwarts, Of course, It's your funeral God bless the illuminati All I see is– NOT IT. IT WASN'T ME. I DIDN'T DO IT. JLO BITCH, STOP TALKING. Woah, What the FUCK JLO. JLO WHAT IN THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY? I–wh– Wait… Fallon? SHHHHThhHHHTHhhTHHHH!! Give me one bet Died inside Who's doing which thing God bless these envies! Gie me one shot Now who am I?Ace in the hole? I died inside. Don't break the barrier Don't run the wall Don't be the villain Fall, JImmy, Fall. To float, or to fall Or to walk away To shop at the mall Or to bet it all on Fall on And I tell you to jump, you jump! And I tell you to move, You move! And I tell you to movie, You movie! And I show you the blue OH GOD. Gimmie the binoculars! No, you don't wanna see What! Why not! HE MOONED ME. I got three of a kind Three of a kind Three of hearts Two of diamonds HAH. I DOn'T LiKE THIS. Fuck off, The Ace. And very kindly, Go fuck yourself. Four aces, Four aces A mindfuck for the both of us An open book And shotglasses And fans of ours Its good to laugh At the ones you love Love Love Love Love It's showbiz, It's showbiz; I love it I want to die. I love it I love it I missed the bar I fucked up somewhere. Don't look back in anger, Or don't look back at al. Fall, Fall, Fall Fall Fall Love Love Love Love Love Love Did you notice I haven't looked back. I put you up on a– Up on a Up on a pedestal Then remembered To forget it all, In indifference Foraged your signature Sorry, I don't want a lot of hawk-a-loogie clock-the-woman knockdown, dragout drama I got a feel for it. What if all your forfeitures were fortunes All your donuts turned subordinates To astronauts Or fake dreams for fak streams and dreaming of Don't bother me I'm on poverty I want walks on the beach and blue bunny ice cream sundaes I've got a whole city Marked off in my journal For frozen custard and Lost in a thought, are we? Trust me, I think I died. Trust me, I trusted the God of Mercy Trust me I went all the way to the burden, Bought a hammock And then worked harder than nobody No dropped calls from mother No one's home at all Work harder I thought Sweater Weather was my new DJ name, But as it turns out, It was my telepathy ringing me I rode to the top of the rock with the beatlesI didn't mean for it to be me But i was twice out of body, Once out of mind. Now give me a minute Please. Let me become indifferent Don't need no friends, Long roads Roundhouse kicks to the face Hard rolling baggage Heart shaped boxes Or Prophets Don't need dozens of roses don't need diamonds Do need dinosaursDo need phone numbers do Do do . –but don't– don't don't. When i fall in line I write books and poems, songs And suffer, slugger . This is what I struggled with– who paid the neighbor bitch to feed me the whole special And slam doors On my mental That shit struck a chord And rubbed me the wrong way But i'm humble I won't touch nobody's Body at all. Nobody's. Now my dreams make sense, kind of But why are these my dreams And not actual people and most of all What does it mean? That I'm equal to? Or lesser than? Like the emerald stone on Sir Paul McCartney's hand, I went green for a moment It's just banter.I'm just having a hard time (I can't sing in this apartment)I might need a band I might need a bandaid. I might need a bath Some peroxide and hair dye My heart's broken I'm having a hard time But still not struggling I might have a hard time But not as hard as the afterparty was, And I struck gold. Kept walking Roll dice. Four of a kind, Four kings, four aces Four of a kind, Four kites, And a night owl The Rock and the Kite, Part V STEFON It's this thing where… {Enter The Multiverse} –and that's why I wished my mom a happy birthday. [The Festival Project ™ ] Damn, the illuminati really showed out for the oscars this year. CONAN SHHHH. He even says “I Am” Then commands the stage Look at all those long legs Now we're on enclave or conclave? I don't know. I'm feeling more ravey. Tears of a Clown Nobody to save me Not even shug avery. Who? That's right? Now i'm feeling more Broadway, baby. L E G E N D S: Manifest Destiny I wanna see the snake sitting next to you; Show me those eyes I love models and the lack thereof Inside of them I want to see the feral reptile Show me those eyesI love that she flies through life Right to you Right It's a boys club Boy they Really prize these Chappel Roans and Timothee Chalemet But where am I at? –Adam Ruins Everything– A couple forced fake laughs Cause I like highlights Stagecrafts Craftservices And god knows I can't write like this And I'm About To die [CONAN O'BRIEN leaves television to run a Bed and Breakfast in ORLANDO.] INT. BED AND BREAKFAST. ORLANDO. … [Calamity ensues] Conan killed the oscars, Stole the wand, The show and the bowtie (hostses with the mostest) –and that's why he's Snowball. No, i'm sure it's because my fur is fluffy and– Okay no more outdated rick and morty references Fine. Was that Dillon Francis behind Ben Stiller Or do I still just like white guys That much. Why do A-Listers like reptiles so much? Show me those eyes, you know I could use a good lunch (Birds of Prey eat snakes) {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2018-2025 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -U.™ Episode Transcript: Yeah. Okay, this is terrifying. I haven't actually done this in it feels like way longer than it's been. In reality, it's only been like three like maybe three days, but it makes all the difference in the world. Hi. what's going on, I was just reminiscing about kitten mittens. Aw shit. I dropped my pen. If you remember if you're listening to this right now and you remember kittenman. congratulations, you've been with me since the beginning. um anyway, I don't know why I was just remembering that. kitten mittens. I thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world. I really I might have been delirious. losing my mind at a certain point, but I thought kittens was the best thing in the world. It was at the time. I was like I couldn't think of anything better. Then again, I was uh I don't know, I was discovering many hilarities. excuse the idiots in the back, they are idiots. um and they and they do this based on whatever I'm doing in my apartment. I'm their god. Anyway. I'm excused the background noise is still gonna be a a little bit uh while we're dealing with that, but at least you can help me collectively consciously remove them from existence entirely, um with the help of you know a collective existence we can get rid of evil. I don't I don't entirely. I'm not sure. I think that it would take a lot of people to understand that like a lot of it is just a game. I think it would take raising the entire consciousness of like people as a whole for them to understand that like, most of it is for entertainment and based off perceptions. So, like, whatever you' idea for the world is, like it was your idea. Whatever's making you upset is it was your idea. So I'm kind of coming to like terms with that in my own, like sense. I'm like, oh, yeah, like, whatever is happening, I'm like a certain like at the surface level is wrong, but like on a grander scale, like I programmed this into my reality for whatever purpose in order to better suit my, like ideal reality. That's, you know, that's that's it. I can't attribute it to anything else. They're idiots, cause I'm idiots. Anyway, what else is going on? I don't know, I was I'm gonna try and do this off book. I think I do have like I have some notes, but like I don't like the way that it feels when I'm going off of my notebook because it feels like robotic. It feels really, you know, like and not necessarily rehearsed, but it's it feels planned and when I listen back to the episodes where I do go off of like notes or something like that, I don't like the way that it sounds. Hearing myself back, going from a going going from like a script. And so I try to keep it like 100% improvisational and it keeps it fresh. and honestly, honesty goodness, I haven't been on the Peloton for like more than 15 minutes at a time since I stopped doing these episodes. I don't know what it is about the sound of my own voice, but maybe it's the fact that like, I'm in performance mode and I'm giving you guys like I'm in, you know, I'm like in my radio voice and then I'm watching back like a performance of myself in order to like, I don't know. It's like it's like experiencing myself for the first time secondhandedly because I'm not necessarily not thinking about what I'm saying, but I'm also not thinking about what what I'm saying or how I'm saying it as I'm saying it. And then, you know, sometimes I just really like even on my hardest days, sometimes I make myself laugh the very most, and I'm like, okay, there's another reason to keep doing it. Because for the most part, I'm like I don't wanna do this anymore, it costs me too much money and it's not. Like, I'm not a clut person. I'm just not a clout guy. I don't like doing stuff for clout, cause clout doesn't pay the bills and clout doesn't clout doesn't necessarily get you jobs, like unless it's like the right person's clout. Like, you get have clout from a million people, and if none of those million people are the well, a million is kind of where they drive line. Like if a million people are like, yeah, this is the shit, then it might get you a job. But like a million is probably the minimum number for that. Like if you don't have a million followers or you don't have a million views or you don't have a million of anything of just like clout like it doesn't pay bills. So I'm not a cloud person. I'm not just gonna do whatever off clout. What did I get off that on that clot rat for? I don't know, what was I saying? Oh, I'm going off book. I'm off. script. Anyway. what can I remember from things that I wrote down?, I don't know. I've been reading a lot. I've been, you know, doing doing the best that I can. I've been well, I've been reading. I've been reading children's books specifically because I'm finding information. Well, first of all, I picked up these children's books with the hope that I would be the owner of a small library and I'm not. I'm actually putting a lot of the books back into like society, which is fine. I'm just downsizing. It's actually helping me feel a lot better. Like my head is a lot clearer, my studio. My studio for for the first time in a long time was like a place that I can that I feel like I want to work. and it was the weirdest thing because I went through like a year of just like collecting whatever book I saw, like whether it was just like on a stoop, like I, you know, for whatever or out of the little free library or like just wherever, because books are everywhere in New York and that's probably my favorite thing hands down about New York is that like wherever you go there are books and they're free and you can pick them up. But I'm also very sensitive to energy, so as like an energy worker and a transmuter, it became congested to the point where it's like, okay, there is like a certain type of energy that's not that's foreign to me and as much cleansing and as much like, you know, whatever, as much, you know, in any kind of, you know, like spiritual work I was doing, there's an energy here that I'm not necessarily comfortable with. And I realized every time I picked up a book, I fell into like a certain type of world, you know, and it wasn't just like whether the book caught my attention from just like the cover or whatever, and then I decided to flip through it or whether it was like a book that I was stuck in, I was falling until like a certain energy or a certain world and that every book had a certain energy to it. And so I realized after a year of collecting hundreds of books that I had literally hundreds of energies, like floating through my space and it became like hectic and it became heavy to the point where I was like, like, I don't necessarily want to hold on to all these things. and so it's it's been really rejuvenating. I've been going through a time of just like not necessarily like I know I have a lot of stuff to do. but one of the stuff to do is is like going through all of the things that I know that I need to like let go of in order to feel better. And it has been helping me feel better. It has for the most part, I'm still doing a lot with like my energy recovery and the noise here has a lot to do with it. I'm now like I now have anxiety to the point where I have like a consistent nauseum. like every time I hear like any kind of motor, like I get sick and now it's it's actually getting worse the longer that I've stayed here with the noise, it's like I now have like an upset stomach all the time, headaches twitches. It's the it's the most fucked up thing ever. and I've also been learning more about because I'm, you know, still still really focused in my music and so frequencies and, you know, like I've always been like a huge believer and like layered frequencies for healing, like sound healing, beta thick alpha, and and the whatnot, but I finally caught onto a piece of information that made me realize how the noise outside has affected my brain chemistry and not just in the way that it's like it's annoying or it's a nuisance or it's harassment, which it is all of those things, according to the law, but in a sense of what's happening to my brain chemically, like the chemical changes that are happening in my brain, or the frequency changes that are happening in my brain are actually the things that are making me more upset than loss of sleep, or, you know, like a disruption or disorganization of my mind or my daily habits. The thing that's making me the most upset is what I'm realizing is it's changing my frequency, and I'm not talking about just my my aura I well, I am in a sense, but like the frequency, the frequency differences that that your brain your brain goes into different frequencies during, you know, waking state, alha state, better state, you know, and when you're sleeping, you're in um I well, it depends on the person actually, and it depends on the type of sleep that you're getting. Like most people sleep and like a data state from what I'm understanding and this is the state of like conscious dreaming. And this is this, I could be incorrect because honestly, I layer them anyway. And I finally I finally did it. I I did. I' I was working on a song and I realized that I achieved like perfect theta without actually even meaning to. And I think I did another one and that was like in perfect gamma without even like it was just mixed perfectly. that it I was also listening to like a gamatone and then I realized I was like, wait, is that the song or is it the tone? Because, you know, if the if the frequency that you're listening to is pure enough, it will actually distort the bass or the, you know, it will distort the entire sound of whatever you're listening to. So sometimes things can sound warped or like they're waving or like they're going through something because those tones are kind of like they're they're moving against each other or with each other just kind of depends. And so what what has been, well, I wanted to finish, well, yeah, I think I have at least one song now that's in theta, and I have at least one song that's in gamma, completely. and and I and I shocked myself because I was listening to the tones and I was like, wait, the wait a second. like, I'm feeling like double here. Is this this song that I'm listening to, that I'm checking back the mix, or is this the the frequencies? And I I turned off all the frequencies and sure enough, it was the song. It was like a pure I was like, wow. I'm like that's an achievement. I did it completely by accident and I wish I knew the formula that I used to do that.c some people are so mathematic about it. Like some people are so uh like, you know, some people do this to their music. A lot of people, especially inass music, that's why it is the way that it is, is you're going to a show to get these frequencies like zapped into your body at at full forces. and some people know how to do it on purpose. I did it on accident, so I'm like, if I can continue to achieve at this but I'm trying to figure out like the mathematical equation or like the actual sonic equation for making this happen, like every time, because going through my history ofass music, I will finish in a second, going through my history of bass music, I have always gravitated to the to these frequencies, to the frequencies that make me feel better after a certain amount of time listening to them or a certain amount of time being in in that frequency. So that's this is the music that has, I guess subconsciously kind of for the kind of artist that I am. But this is the reason why I'm upset about the noise. like the most upset about it, like not even on a legal level, on a social level, on a moral level, like, no, this is actually morally wrong, it is morally wrong on so many fucking levels. I'm like, why are you so like, why obviously I did this on purpose, like in my God complex, I'm like, oh, well, I can better the community as long as I make a point, like that environmentally, this is damaging people. It's giving people mental illness, that it or like if they're predisposed to mental illness, it's even worse, but it's it's also like causing mental illness and people that are otherwise healthy people, which is not a lot of people in New York City given. It's just not. It's not a healthy place. A lot of people are not healthy. But even in like moderately healthy humans, this noise disruption can cause like brain changes and chemistry changes, and this is the reason why I'm so upset is because when you are sleeping, if you are sleeping, your brain is in a certain level that is like in a healing state. In the first few minutes that you wake up, as I understand it. In the first few minutes after you wake up, your brain is in a state that it can like that you can manipulate your entire environment, that you can change things, that you can heal yourself. And so when I'm waking up in the first few minutes in the very first thing that I hear is a motorcycle that's ripping through my fucking brain, it's changing my brain frequency from a frequency that is like at the at the at a human level or at any kind of level, kind of the the thing that makes every human capable of being a genius, not the genius level able to heal yourself and the frequency that you're able to heal yourself is what you automatically wake up in. So when you' when this frequency is interrupted, it's intercepted in immediately into a negative thought pattern. And so you immediately, so what's happening, what's been happening to me over the last year with the motorcycle nuisance harassment problem or whatever the fuck I don't care what it's called on paper. I just want it to stop like I just want to live in peace. It's not like and kind of having like coming from a a background where I kind of tend to have like take responsibility for myself, like oh, it must be something that I'm doing and yes, I also have like a higher god complex or like an ego if you want to call it, that's like, oh no, I must have done this on purpose. And you know, like in order for the greater good, like in order to fulfill my purpose in some sort of way, it must be it must be part of my process to have this. That's also my ego like I'm a god. like, you know, that's just me, that's the generation. That's the generation that I come from. That's our mindset. Like nothing happens in this world without me in it, period. That's why rappers are rappers and that's why that's why models are models. We all have egos and it's really hard to kill the bitch. I've had at least ten ego dusts throughout my fucking like existence and it still comes back. It doesn't matter. You can have an ego death and be like a completely ego list for like what, six months tops? Eventually you're gonna have like the ego is is is imp important to survival, because I lost the word. I think implemental what was I gonna use? I was definitely a for syllable word. Either way, it is you need it. Like if you if you oh, you know, people might describe people, like being in like a in a sense of humility as like, oh, just completely without ego, but like at the end of the day, like, no, like your ego allows you to actually like compensate with the rest of the world, like, most people do not have no ego entirely, or at least for like, like a week after your acid tri or whatever, yeah, like, oh, had ego death and I completely. But like within I swear to God, like within six months time, like your ego has at least minimally like repaired itself. That's what an ego does, that's why you have it. You have it. It's a survival. It's it's a part of your consciousness that has to do with survival if you don't have your ego, like you're pretty much dead in the world, especially the way it is now. Anyway, this is that that's going to probably close up my spiel on that. Yeah, I'm upset because instead of like the first few moments of my waking moments being a healing, time, it is immediately going into disarray and chaos and anxiety. And so in in so I'm losing like, I don't I don't really care about oh, I mean, like I care about life in a sense, but I mean, like, and it in a mortal sense. I like, yes, it's taking years off of me. and I feel it like in the way that it's like, I I am slower to do regular things or like, whatever my rising thoughts, might be are completely just destroyed by this like what I've what I've come to perceive is like an evil force. It is evil in so many levels again this breaks down from like a higher consciousness to like a lower state of consciousness. The lower state of consciousness is saying that like these people are just idiots. They're idiots and they are not self aware of the fucking like pollution that they're doing on kind of middle sense, I'm like, oh, it's politics, it's like gentrification if these guys run around in circles, then people call up the fucking place, the place gets fucking more allocated funds to their fucking police officers, the police officers have fucking filling their quotas. It's all bureaucracy and paperwork and politics on that middle level and on the highest level it is like no, this is evil, it's pure evil because people are so grossed out by the fact that fucking New York is New York and also the wage and income and quality factor is that this guy is doing whatever the fuck he has to do brown. He's doing well, not that guy. that guy's that guy's a weak dick motherfucker. He has a small dick and everybody in the neighborhood knows it. He drives around and circle making people miserable. He also I'm it's the same dude. that same dude followed me to the Trader Joe's. It's the same dude, so I'm like, I like I know the sound of his bike from anything, so I definitely know when I'm at the Trader Joe's and then he's like all of a sudden traffic like, I'm like yo dude like why the fuck you following me to Trader Joe's like I live four miles away, which is not that far on the fucking motorcycle, but I came all the way over here on the subway for you to follow me on your bike. week, dick, bro.way, like, fuck this, fuck this, fuck that guy, fuck this neighborhood, fuck this place, fuck these politics, fuck these people. On a low frequency. Like on a low frequency, I'm like, fuck all this, like on a high frequency, I'm like, there's a purpose or whatever, it'll work, is temporary, blah, blah, blah. What the fuck was I saying? I don't know. I what the fuck was I ranting? I don't know. I that's that shiel, right? Trader Joe, hello Trader Joe. It's not safe. No, but you know, oh man, let's you say I, whatever. Let's just say oh, whatever. a lot. What else do we got? I don't know. I put on an album that came out today, yay, it's called all the rage. Actually, all that all that gripe about like, oh, it's an EP when I'm sure that the stores are gonna call it an album. I was like, I'm sure it's gonna be an album, so I just started calling it an album. like the release comes out and they're like, it's an EP, you congratulations. So I I thought I was putting out an album, that I was an EP, but it just missed the cutoff her album, because technically you can have a six track album and if it's over 30 minutes. If and you can have a six track album that's an EP like this, all the range is technically an EP at least according to Spotify's standards. And it's, I think it's like two and a half minutes under I think it's like 2 and a half minutes under, so it's an EP, but it's six tracks and I'm really excited about it. I kind of put a little bit more promotion into it than usual. I even had some press done, and that's great. because you can get pressed done. They're like,Yo, for $500. You'll be famous tomorrow. I'm like, that fucked up. That's a paycheck for some people. and that's not famous. also. They're charging people to be like spectacular. Well, they're charging they're like charging for people to be like popular, which is I think it's wrong, like ethically, you shouldn't be able to do that, like, oh, no, you're gonna get on all the playlists and whatever, you're gonna have like all like you should not be able to sell followers, like whether they're real people, which is slavery or they're robots, which is also slavery. Like you should not be able to sell fame that's making it like now I don't even trust like, okay, like this person got an award, but like, okay, because because the album was popular, because it was better than all the other ones. Or like, how do you know that you even heard all the albums because there are so many, and that like, okay, this person who put like zero dollars into promotion, how do you know that album wasn't better? because you didn't hear it? Because the person with a million dollar ad campaign won the fucking won the fucking award? Because you heard it because they put a million dollars into the fucking promotions. So it makes it makes everything the fact that everything is on a level system that's based on money is completely unfair. Like the all the industries are broken, it's not just music. Like, it's not just music. I'm like, holy shit, like you could spend like a year, an average year salary, which is what's the median income now. even with like no adjustment for inflation, like what, $50,000? Okay. So you could spend $50,000 on your your career so you'd have to you'd have to do that. That's even you're still competing with people who have a million dollars for doing nothing. That's insane. Anyway, I'm not bitter. What the fuck did I do earlier that I wasn't that literally the spirit that was like, don't be salty. I was like, oh, I was like,Yo, stop teaching models to fucking DJ, because I I happened on this girl that was like, yo, like I actually liked some of her music. I liked some of her music, but she wasn't doing much. And like everything was just fake. It was like super duper fake, but she was mad gorgeous and like more of these girls are popping up out of nowhere that are like not they're like models that are barely touching the decks and they're like a march. I'm like yo, dude, if that girl made this music like okay, maybe I should see her, but like, I'm like no somebody goes produce this because like she's moving badly in time to it and I realized something about being a producer is like yo if you spent enough time actually crafting this like this piece, you're not gonna move like badly to it like you're not going to move weird to music that you made because it's in you like it came from in your body. So like, I was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm looking at and I'm like, oh, I'm looking at propaganda. But then like, isn't that just kind of like discouraging people who don't have that type of body type or mindset, but it was funny because the algorithm was like don't be salty. It was like DJing is for everybody and if that's your passion and I'm like yeah, if that's your passion, but like, yo, when what where is the line between like propaganda and passion? Like, oh, I'm already a successful like, multimillionaire fashion model, but like I'm gonna be a DJ, like it washes out all the people who have actually like put in the work. It washes out all the people who have actually put in the work. Don't be salty. I was like fine, fine, but only because I like that algorithm. Only because I like that algorithm. I'm like fine, okay, we'll we'll be whatever. Whatever I've been reading. Oh, I read a book, let's see, let's see if I can remember the ones I already put back. I've been reading these uh this like children's book series on like famous people because I realized that they're written for children and I'm like, yo, dude, like somebody could read this whole series in the second grade and be smarter than me because I didn't know anything about the people that I'm reading about at all. And so they're like these little biographies. Well, I mean, they they're on a child's level. I don't know how long it would take a child to read, but they take me like an hour, hour and a half to read just like at a normal speed. And I read really fast. But I think the reason why from taking me so long to read them is because I actually take like a lot of I take a lot of like, I don't know, words or art to me, so if something is like especially musical, I might take it and be like that's a good song title. Like, if I think enough about this and what I know about this, like what kind of song is it? And, you know, just like little fun facts. Like first of all, I'm obsessed with George Lucas. I've never been a huge Star Wars person, just and I I realizing this. I've never been being on like Star Wars wicked. like, I've never been being on things that are like really, really big, but then I did grow up and kind of like a sheltered shut community where like most of the people like twilight, I wasn't hungerames, aylys Cyrus, well Hannah Montana at the time, okay? I just wasn't into those things, but most mostly because they're fans, actually, she just put out something that I kind of piqued my interest. It was in my fucking sl side bar. I was like, oh, no, what's this? I'm I might check it out. But I've been staying off the mainstream just cause I'm realizing like the reason that I'm seeing this is money and doesn't necessarily make it better or worse than anybody else. Because sometimes mainstream artists come out with crap and I think they do it on purpose, they're like,Yo, watch this. I can do whatever because so many millions of people love me, watch this. I'm like, damn. And then millions of people are like, yay, yes, yes, this. I'm like, the fuck? What did you do? And I'm pretty sure the mainstream artist is like consciously, even collectively like, you see what I'm saying? I can do whatever the fuck.c I did one thing cool, maybe like five things cool, like a long time ago, and literally don't have to do anything else. I just do this just to prove a poil. Like, I can shit on a track, literally. And millions of people will be like, I love you. I love you, please more of those. do it again. I'm like, oh, God, please, no. What the fuck? Millions of fans. Like once you have your fucking fan based unlock, like that's it. Like, you don't have to fucking people will be like, literally kissing at all of the ground that you touch for the rest of forever forever. That's it. I'm realizing that about fantom, so I'm like, yo, if you know what kitten mittens are. I'd still don't, but if you if you know kitten mittens, congrats, you're one of 12 people who actually like me. one of 12. I'm like 12 is enough. That's what Jesus had, right? might as well and Jesus technically have like 11 I don't know why I like that guy so much. I'm pretty much obsessed with him, too. I love Jesus. I'm like, Jesus is the god kind of I mean, like he's technically like three gods. anyway, why am I obsessed with uh George Lucas? First of all, he's one of the coolest people ever, Kate, like, okay, first he was a greaser, like a real greaser. like from the movie Grease, but like the actual thing before the movie Grease, cause if I if I'm not mistaken, he was like a greaser before they made Grease. That's crazy. Yeah, because Gre was like in the 70s, but it was about the 50s, right? I don't know. He was like an actual real life, like they just put Vaseline, I guess in their hair and wore like dirty shit and they were like, yeaheah, greaser. and they w and they fucking drove and they drove, what did they drive? I don't know, cars, old cars, and they would race them. I that was honestly I'm obsessed with this dude. I and now I kind of want to see Star Wars because I've never seen them. But honestly Star Wars is one of those things that, oh, that's what I was saying. God, yeah, well, yeah, I like grew up not liking Star Wars because all the people that liked it were mean. Like all those other things I named earlier in the episode. Like they're fans sucked, so I was like, I definitely cannot see myself getting into this. And so I never did, but now I'm well, as happy as I am being single. I save certain things for like just a case. I ever get in a relationship. I'm like Star Wars. I've never seen that. Like I saved certain things for like you know, like I wouldn't necessarily want to watch it by myself. I think I'd get geeked, though, now, now that I understand, like the kind of person that created Star Wars, I'm like, yo, dude, like he's the shit. Like, okay, first of all, okay, if I did the math, secondly, no, cause the first of all thing was like, he's a greaser. That's the coolest thing about George Lucas. Yeah. I mean, like I mean, like there was so many cool things. I had to take notes, I had to stop. I was like bending back pages, I was like, all this dude's the best. Okay. I was like,Yo, okay, whatever. Like, uh, oh, well, that was one of the last things I read. If I did the math right, this dude has like a 12 year old. He's older than my dad. My dad's pushing 80. I'm like, is he 80? He's like 80 with a 12 year old. That's incredible. That's I have so much respected admiration for that. Because it kind of proves my point that like if you're dude, you can just like keep on popping them out, popping them out. But he also like adopted kids, I think. Yeah, yeah. And he also like adopted kids. was at him? Yeah. Yo, I'm telling you there's so much practice into these little books. I'm like, okay, whatever, what else is cool. I don't know, he just seems he just seems like the dude just seems like the dude. I was likeYo. I I can't remember all the notes I took, but those those two things alone. I'm like, yeah, I earn my respect. I did write down a quote earlier that was like, what did he used to say? oh, do that again but better? I'm like, yeah, that sounds that sounds accurate. And then I liked the fact that like all his worlds within his worlds are like connected, so he'll leave Easter eggs within worlds of different Indiana Smith. He really liked the name Indiana because I guess he had a dog named Indiana, which was named after somebody else that was named Indiana. And I had no idea that Indiana Jones was like his brainchild or like close to it. I was like, whoa, this dudees are fucking legend, like a real like an actual, like this dude's a G for George Lucas. He's the best. I was like, yeah, dude. I could not put that book down. I was like sitting in cold bathtub water like, oh my God, this is such a pain turner. I gotta read about this dude until the very end of this book and I did. I would not put it down. I was like, George Lucas is the man, bro. like the man, I don't like like, yo, cool dude. I like that guy. I've never seen Star Wars. I have, I've seen like the beginning. It's like in the time, blah, fucking blah, blah, fucking talk. Yeah, and then I started writing my own movies, you know. It's not that any of them, you know, as whatever, you know, sometimes it's circumstance, sometimes sometimes I' just realize that I make excuses. Like I have no reason not to be as successful as any of these people that I'm reading about, because I'm finding personality traits about myself as I'm reading about them, like Albert Einstein Total Duis. He might have been like like functionally retarded. I'm pretty sure he was retarded, but also a genius. Like like, oh, okay, this is the coolest thing about Albert Einstein are we done inukas never, never. He's immortal, right? We'll see him at some point. He's so cool. He's so cool anyway. I was like, yeah, dude, this dude is cool. But there's that's the Alb Einstein, my man, okay, so like, slowly almost solely responsible for the invention of the Adamah. That's dope. On accident, though, because once he realized what had like once he realized that, okay, like, okay, I'm correct about this. For sure, I'm definitely correct about this, but like, yo okay, should we back up a little bit? First of all, he didn't say anything until he was like four. Didn't say anything, not a not a single word, his parents were like,o, something's wrong with him. Like even back in the day where it's like, uh don't know. Something's wrong with him. He's not saying anything. The doctors were like, he's perfectly fine.'s fine. And he didn't say anything his entire life until one day, apparently, he sat down to dinner with his parents and the soup was too hot, and that's what he said he's like the soup is too hot. Like, could you imagine, like having a kid that you're like 100% sure is retarded? Oops, nope, you can't say that. Okay, well, you could. Then so let's just shouldn't I just cancel you can't say that. Why, though? Like, okay, when I was growing up, you have to understand I come from a time where it was like you could just call that to somebody cause they were being dumb, but not dumb, right? But I mean like at a certain point, like, okay, technically Helen Keller was deaf dumb and blind, but like sometime and I'm assuming like between the 70s and 80s, it became a slang for like that's dumb. Like, don't do that because whatever you're doing is not right, which is like, okay if you're not right, then you're what? Retarded. Like, I'm sorry. I'm like some certain things are not going to be like, I'm, you know. I'm like early 2000s game or culture, that's gay, but I love gay. It's like nobody's being derogatory about that. I'm being derogatory about your behavior and I might even use it as like a positive you know what's what describing words or adjectives? I don't know. I'm going through. I'm going to processes realizing that like, okay, I'm at the age where certain information is gonna be offloaded. Certain like it's not coming back ever. Like, you like, I I know Spanish, but only if I have to speak it and it's not like, I'm not developing any other nothing else is like my brain is like, we don't need this, do we? I'm like, I don't know. Maybe I should hold on to that. No, no, we don't need this. I'm like, okay, well. there are certain things about me that are just not gonna change at this point. I'm not sorry, because honestly, weren't too offended at everything when, like, there're there are things that are offensive that nobody really is offended about. like, if you really found an offensive, it would not exist anymore, you know? Because when somebody becomes really passionate about something, and they change it. Which is why I'm taking my time. I like, youo, annihilation is imminent. Like this cannot be anymore. Like, you don't change my brain chemistry. Fuck that shit. my brain chemistry is perfect the way that it is. Like I'm almost sure that like the entire mental health industry will change based on ideals that are like blooming and other like in other what the fuck was I just saying exactly ideas that are already springing up in in small circles. like they'll, you know, be one day. Like that's just valid, like nothing's really wrong with you. something's wrong with the world. Like, why? Like, and what can we do to change that? It could be environmental completely. It could take somebody with like severe mental health issues, severe schizophrenia, severe bipolar disorder, severe fucking severe depression, severe anxiety and change their environmental factors or even just like change the fact that that like they're facing poverty, poverty is a mental illness and that's not what it's not looked at as such. It's looked at as a deficiency on the individual's part when it could be like and it could be a polethro of environmental factors. That'll change. It will in my lifetime. I know that it will. It may not be because of me because for the most part, I'm a pacifist. I really am. I'm a yoder, like, honestly, it has to be like visibly hurting someone else or hurting me painfully enough for me to be passionate about it to make it change. Like, I'm sorry, I'm not. I don't want I don't really want to be a leader, especially because like people are still like populating this planet. I don't necessarily I don't I don't wanna be like a a leader in anything because that is like that's too much power. Honestly, just let me play the music and then fuck off. And I will fuck off. Like if you think I talk too much or you find me annoying or you think I'm stupid like eventually I I disappear. That's it a self-reflective Go away, all right. I't have to be asked twice. I don't stay in places where I'm not welcome. So, New York it's been good. Are't not really. But somebody I thought okay, who else am I obsessed with? I love this new lady that I found. Her name is Gina something rather fucking amazing. I I love New York people because I love New York people. Like I really do. like it is well, it's hard to fucking there's a fucking oh, honestly, it could be simplified to this as like, okay, maybe this embraces like the new the New York feminine and what I really hate is the New York masculine, which is just toxic, just disgusting, like where I spinning on things, shut the fuck up, like, are you not self aware? Like it's it's certain level of and I'm not, I'm really not binary in the sense where it's like balanc, bro. like balance, like a little bit of everything is good and like half masculine, half feminine is like a good balance, non-binary embracing that. But like yo, dude, there's a certain rasculinity about the city that's the thing that makes it nasty. It was like, whoa. whoa. I'm like, that's nasty, but I was oh, okay, I'm in love with this person. Her name is like Gene or something rather. I'm still I still have like I no, I have no feet in the comedy pool cause like I realized I stopped performing comedy and I stopped writing it, and like all the like semi tragic possibility, like possibly hilarious situations that were happening to me when I was actively writing comedy just stopped. I was like good, I don't necessarily need to be in that right now. That's that has sailed and will probably later sink, but I don't want to be in there if like, okay, like you're funny, if like sad and bad shit happens to you all the time. I'm like, that's fucked up. I don't wanna be that guyc 50 years from now I could be that guy and like still not earn a penny more than I'm earning right now making music underground. So if it's if I had to choose between the two, I've already earned mastery in recording arts. 10,000 hours or more, like I don't necessarily like being a comic is like another ladder. It's another it's a thing. And honestly, when I stopped like, well, I mean, like I I took a break from tears of a clown because it became such a like passion project for me that I was like, oh, this is that I'm caring too much like I should stop. and still not finish and it's not it's not like, it never had a release date in mind, so it's not necessarily like what's it delayed? Yeah, it's not delayed, and it's not it's definitely not in hiatus, but like, I realized that I have a certain responsibility to my audience altogether. It like to do this show as well and so like this, there's been taking kind of a priority, knowing that like my hiatus has been longer than any other hiatus is, and that I owe it to like my homegrown audience and my weird coat following to like okay like I have to give you guys everything from fucking like November to now and just musically that's a lot but then I've also the writing has also accompanied it and so it would be a shame to just let that go entirely because I feel that like my actual, my actual fan base is here in this show, unfortunately, well, not unfortunately, because I've started to get like a sense of familiarity within the dance music scene, like, as a producer through this podcast as a medium, because when I started doing this podcast, like, it wasn't like people weren't generally like now people are doing like following my, what's it? format. Like people weren't really doing DJ mixes and like putting music on podcasts, like it just wasn't people weren't doing it. I was the only one doing it now everybody's doing it and it makes me want to do it less, but then also like I have to kind of show consistency with myself in order for me to feel like I'm still doing something. What was that rant about? I don't know. I'm obsessed with this lady name's Gina or something rather. She's super New York. What would she say? that I really liked? Oh, if you didn't know the rules before you got to New York, you you like if you came to New York and you're not having a good time, you probably didn't know the rules before you got here.rect. I didn't come here on purpose. This was my layover city. I came here by accident and I did not know the rules. Now I'm learning the rules and I'm like the rules are fucked up and rules are kind of meant to be broken if you're disturbing my peace, I will then disturb your peace. No, I will not. I do not believe an eye for an eye, and also I feel that you are dangerous people. I will then report you to the police and and make the proper documentation in order for it to stop. I'm a snitch. I don't give a fuck. Like if you're actually hurting me, like if you're changing my the way that I think and the way that I feel, like if you're making me sick inside of my own environment, like you deserve it. I'll give a fuck. I don't give a fuck. I don't give any kind of fuck. And then that way, I am a feminist, cause it's like, yo, dude, like how long are you gonna sit and take somebody hurting you before you actually realize that like you're not the problem they are and in order for their behavior to stop, you have to actually like you have to prevent this by stepping up for yourself. It's kind of like a show and like, okay, like like at a certain point it is kind of like a game. Like how long are you going to let me do this to you before you just fucking like get up and fucking hit me back? And I'm like, I don't want to like, I don't want to fight, but at the same time, like, bro, like I've been getting my ass whipped by these idiots and so I'm like, okay, I have to actually, but I'm still not a fighter. I have to do it in a way that makes sense and so that the community can be improved when I move on. Like I don't necessarily want to put somebody in the same place that I am now because I really am not I don't and just improve it. Like I believe so much in doing that, like not just leaving no trace, but like improving the place from which you are situated when you leave so that when the next person comes through, they don't have to struggle through the same hardship. So in that way, leadership, sure, be

Every great work God does through theCHURCH is preceded with prayer by theCHURCH.

The Masters have begun and we talk about it all throughout the morning. We discuss the gravity that is this series against the Guardians what's at stake for the Royals. And then Ernie Johnson gets us emotional about the loss of basketball on TNT.

Our favorite Asian beers. Remembering Mitch Hedburg. Dire wolves have returned, is humanity ready? We look back on the film career of Val Kilmer. Can Liam Neeson capture Leslie Nielsen's magic in the new Naked Gun movie?

It has been a while since Ben and Ernie have done an old fashioned debt payoff episode, but it's still one of the hottest topics when it comes to personal finance. And in their veiw, at least, paying off debt is where most of the personal finance world gets it wrong. YNAB has a unique method for paying off debt with an emphasis on sustainability and maintaining motivation. The key is to learn how to plan for future large and less frequent expenses so that you don't continue to get into more debt.   Another key is to remember that we are humans, not numbers. So while the personal finance sphere may dive into the deep end of working out the math on interest rates and pay down schedules, at the end of the day it doesn't matter if you can't sustain your pay off plan. To that end, Ben and Ernie offer YNAB's four step process for paying off your debt without going crazy and without living like a monk. There's even room for fun money!     Follow Budget Nerds on YouTube Budget Nerds Livestreams: https://www.youtube.com/@YNABofficial/streams Budget Nerds Episodes: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuIUGmbCDklkDCDm-cQqv2g   Share your YNAB wins with Ben and Ernie! budgetnerds@ynab.com   Get your tickets to YNAB Fan Fest 2025! Coming to San Diego, Minneapolis, and NYC. Tickets are ON SALE NOW: YNAB.com/events

Barry Livingston, best known as Ernie from My Three Sons, brings a treasure trove of Hollywood stories in this nostalgic ride through decades of TV and film. From early beginnings alongside his brother Stanley to memorable roles in The Orville, Mad Men, Zodiac, and more—Barry shares the ups, downs, and delightful surprises of a lifelong acting career. He reflects on brushes with icons like Paul Newman and Elvis Presley, his transition from child actor to seasoned pro, and the quirky journey that shaped his signature look. Plus, a behind-the-scenes peek at working with legends like Lucille Ball, Fred MacMurray, Adam Sandler, and Steven Spielberg. Episode Highlights: How Barry's first role with Paul Newman led to a surprise diagnosis—and launched his Hollywood journey The real reason he was fired from Rally Round the Flag, Boys! and how it became a blessing in disguise What it was like working on The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet and transitioning into My Three Sons The McMurray Method: how Fred MacMurray filmed My Three Sons out of order—and no one noticed Barry's surreal ride around the Paramount lot with Elvis Presley (while watching Popeye in a decked-out Cadillac) His hilarious encounter with Steven Spielberg and why Spielberg fan-boyed over him Behind-the-scenes memories from working with Lucille Ball, William Frawley, and Betty White From Doogie Howser to Bosch—how Barry built a second act as a beloved character actor What Adam Sandler did that no one else in Hollywood would—and how it landed Barry in You Don't Mess with the Zohan Honest reflections on navigating fame, adolescence, and the 1970s acting grind with grace (and some weed)   You're going to love my conversation with Barry Livingston IMDB Order Barry's book!  Follow Jeff Dwoskin (host): Jeff Dwoskin on Twitter The Jeff Dwoskin Show podcast on Twitter Podcast website Podcast on Instagram Join my mailing list Subscribe to my Youtube channel (watch Crossing the Streams!) Yes, the show used to be called Live from Detroit: The Jeff Dwoskin Show Ways to support the show: Buy me a coffee (support the show) TeePublic Store: Classic Conversations merch and more! Love the books I talk about on the show? Here is my Amazon store to shop.  

More from Rightside Media: https://www.rightsidemedia.org Our other shows: https://www.rightsidemedia.org/podcasts

Today, our guest is Ernie Parker. Ernie started learning about fluid power technology in 1965, which led him to teaching it at Hennepin Technical College. In 2019 he was recognized by the International Fluid Power Society and inducted into the inaugural class of the IFPS Hall of Fame for his achievements and contributions to the industry. Ernie also serves as a technical liaison for our hydraulically powered bicycle competition, the Fluid Power Vehicle Challenge. Today, we've invited him into the forum to discuss the advancements he's witnessed in fluid power technology, some of the unique projects he's worked on - including his experience consulting on hydraulic systems for amusement park rides at the Mall of America. We'll also explore the challenges of designing reliable hydraulic systems, as well as what the future holds for the industry.  Connect with the host, Eric Lanke, at elanke@nfpa.com  or on LinkedIn at the National Fluid Power Association. Connect with Ernie Parker at ernieparker1@msn.com.  Images of Ernie Parker's Projects

On this episode, Pamela Watts reports on the financial impacts both good and not so good for two Rhode Island cities since the Washington Bridge closure. Then, contributor David Wright introduces us to some entrepreneurs who turned the crumbling Washington Bridge into an ice cream flavor. Also on this episode, as much of the country this week is gripped by final four fever – the NCAA basketball championships, we take another look at the incomparable Providence college hoopster, the legendary, Ernie DiGregorio, affectionately known as Ernie D. Finally, on this episode of Weekly Insight, Michelle San Miguel and our contributor WPRI 12's politics editor Ted Nesi discuss Congressman Seth Magaziner's flip flopping on taking up residence in his district.

Ernie and Chris talk recap this past high school season and all things basketball.

Wuzzup Broskies !! On this episode of the BUG we are joined by an ORIGINAL B.U.G.O.G. Scotty Boy !!! We kick things off with an exciting phone call from out missing broski Rich Bundy . Where has he been ? What has he been up to ? Chocolates and Vinegar ? Jimmy comes at us with a NEW Jimmys Foodie Review . You get a dose of your Weekly Weird News. Is there a B.U.G. Civil War ? Bigfoots "Foots THC BBQ Sauce" official launch and we get "Patience with the Broskies" . On the second half of the show we are joined by our broskies Ernie Lewis and Fidel Martinez!! Ernie and Fidel are here to give us a behind the scenes stories about their colab album "A Bakersfield Waltz" . We dive deep into the songs of this wonderful album and break down the lyrics to these tracks. Ernie never leaves his guitar too far so he graces us with a LIVE performance of "Rainy Day Kisses" , a preview of "Shelter" and a NEW song "My Broskies" by Ernie Lewis himself !!!Follow Ernie Lewis on social media IG - @ernielewismusicFB - Ernie LewisYouTube - @ernielewismusicCheck out Ernie Lewis "A Bakersfield Waltz" on ALL streaming platforms Follow Fidel Martinez in social media IG - @fidelmartinez7827FB - Fidel Martinez Purchase Fidel Martinez Books on Amazon Follow The Bakersfield Underground Podcast to book your appearancesIG - @thebugpodcastCheck out the Bakersfield Underground Podcast on YouTube !!YouTube - @thebug420

Can you still make real money renting cars in 2025, or is the Turo wave fading? Join Russ, Joey, and Ernie as they examine the current state of the Turo car rental business, weighing the benefits, red flags, and real-life profitability of this investment strategy.From rising maintenance costs and vehicle depreciation to leveraging the platform's growing demand, the guys break down what it takes to succeed and who this model is really for. Whether you're curious about Turo as a passive income play or if it aligns with your Investor DNA, today's conversation will help you decide.Top three things you will learn:-The basics of car-sharing-Depreciation, maintenance, and ROI-Does Turo fit your investment strategy?The Self Storage Investing Podcast:-https://selfstorageinvesting.com/our-podcasts/Create a Six-Figure Side Hustle in Peer-to-Peer Car-Sharing:-https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/carsTurn Active Income Into Passive Income:-https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/piosBook Your Free Passive Income Game Plan Session:-https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/freecallWealth Without Wall Street New Book:-https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/newbookIBC Webinar:-https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/ibcJoin Our Next Inner Circle Live Event:-https://www.wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/live-Promo Code: PODCASTFind Out How Close You Are to Financial Freedom: -https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/quizJoin the Wealth Without Wall Street Community: -https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/communityDiscover Your Path to Financial Freedom: -https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/pathJoin the Passive Income MasterMind: -https://wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/wwws-passive-income-mastermindJoin Our Short-Term Rental (STR) Course:-https://go.wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/strcourseThe Land Geek:-https://thelandgeek.com/How to Buy Online Businesses for Profit:-

The Chinese AI Beat The U.S. AI in Chess. Artie Intel and Machine Learning report on Artificial Intelligence for The AI Report. From Ideas to Products – Arcade & Off/Script are "Doing It". OpenAI’s “Cuddly Compute” Computer. Isomorphic Labs’ $600M Drug Discovery Boost. Musk Merges X with xAI. AI Tools & Training - Grammarly, Descript, and Synthesia lead the pack. OutSkill’s 16-hour AI boot camp. AI Used In Oscar-winning Films. Kaiber.ai for storyboarding and AIVA for scores. Google’s Gemini 2.5 Pro can “think” through problems like a human. The AI Report Shaq Fu Radio

So much marketing today feels cold and impersonal, like it was churned out by a machine with no real understanding of the audience. Brands are blending together, all using the same predictable phrases and empty enthusiasm. The ones that stand out are the ones that sound real—like an actual person is behind the words, not just an algorithm following a formula. People connect with authenticity, and that's something no AI can fully replicate, no matter how advanced it gets. Ernie Harker, a professional speaker, AI branding specialist, and author of Your Brand Sucks, helps businesses transform through innovative marketing strategies. With a background in illustration and branding, he delivers high-energy presentations on leveraging AI for creative growth. He has guided industries in rethinking their marketing approaches using generative AI tools. Today, he explores the power of custom GPTs for personalized content, how AI simplifies complex projects, and the balance between technological efficiency and preserving human creativity. Stay tuned! Resources Ernburn: Branding With AI! Follow Ernie Harker on Facebook Connect with Ernie Harker on LinkedIn

This week Ernie & Carter talk about the spoiler of the newest Venom host in All New Venom #5 (1:40), the ending of X-Manhunt Omega (19:40)& the reveal of Marvel Cosmic Invasion (41:40:). Then, they'll be joined by Jeffrey Maza from ⁨‪@DynamiteComics‬ for Dynamite's monthly Comics Claim Sale!

Ernie Manning Racing Historian James Oldring - Perth Racing CEO The $5 million Quokka will be run at Ascot on April 26.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ben and Ernie are back again to fix a very messy budget, and this time they are doing it live! This is a replay from their YouTube livestream on Mar 26th, 2025. There is a strong visual component to this episode, so we recommend you watch the replay on YouTube (link below), but we are posting the audio on the podcast feed as well.   Messy Budget Livestream Replay: https://www.youtube.com/live/tjK_lxpdVm0?si=EGTA5iMo6oyJ3jrL     Follow Budget Nerds on YouTube Budget Nerds Livestreams: https://www.youtube.com/@YNABofficial/streams Budget Nerds Episodes: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuIUGmbCDklkDCDm-cQqv2g   Share your YNAB wins with Ben and Ernie! budgetnerds@ynab.com   Get your tickets to YNAB Fan Fest 2025! Coming to San Diego, Minneapolis, and NYC. Tickets are ON SALE NOW: YNAB.com/events

This episode features 3 well known and accomplished turkey hunters in Ernie Calandrelli (Quaker Boy Game Calls), James Harrison (Phelps Calls/MeatEater and Harrison Custom Calls), and Josh Grossenbacher (Rolling Thunder Game Calls). This trio has a multitude of contest calling titles between them as well as many successful years of killing turkeys.  They take us through what makes them successful each spring, sharing a lot of knowledge as well as a lot of laughs. This episode was originally released in April of 2023.  Since that time, Ernie has been elected to the NWTF Hall of Fame.   

Together they sail or sink! Today, March 26th at 3:00pm Eastern, Ben and Ernie will be livestreaming on YouTube and will attempt to fix a messy YNAB budget. This episode will have a heavy visual component, so you will want to watch it on YouTube at the link below.   If you miss it, you can still watch the replay on YouTube, and the audio will be posted to the podcast feed in a couple days. In the meantime, happy YNAB'ing!   http://www.youtube.com/@YNABofficial    

The story of how eminent domain destroyed a person's home place. Ernie was about 27 years old when this happened.

Choice Classic Radio presents Broadway Is My Beat, which aired from 1949 to 1954. Today we bring to you the episode titled "The Ernie Cauldwell Murder Case.” Please consider supporting our show by becoming a patron at  http://choiceclassicradio.com We hope you enjoy the show!

The story of how eminent domain destroyed a person's home place. Ernie was about 27 years old when this happened.

In this heartfelt episode of 'You Are Beautiful,' host Laurence Zarian, also known as LZ, welcomes SNL's Heidi Gardner for a deep and candid discussion. The two explore themes of self-worth, gratitude, and navigating personal challenges. Gardner shares intimate stories about her mother, Ernie, her experiences on SNL, and insights on love and vulnerability. The conversation touches on the complexities of family dynamics, personal growth, and the significance of finding joy and support in life and work. As they plan a sweet treat rendezvous at 30 Rock, they celebrate the beauty in life's poignant moments and the lessons learned from them.Timestamp menu: 00:00 Welcome to 'You Are Beautiful'00:57 Special Guest Introduction01:54 Pandemic Reflections02:41 Morning Mood and Gratitude03:42 Sober Life and Restarting the Day05:06 Feelings and Higher Power06:48 SNL 50th Anniversary07:49 Meeting Idols and Social Anxiety14:50 Childhood and Family Reflections17:37 Navigating Parental Relationships19:24 Caring for a Parent with Dementia25:26 Memories and Success27:16 Life in Los Angeles29:58 Working at SNL34:09 Reflecting on Maya Rudolph's Professionalism35:16 Kristen Wiig's Advice and SNL Experience38:02 Navigating Fame and Public Interactions40:55 The Challenges of Live Performances43:00 Favorite Characters and Sketches44:16 The SNL Process and Working with Celebrities49:54 Lessons from Lorne Michaels51:07 Personal Reflections and Life Lessons01:01:11 The Importance of Communication in Relationships01:04:02 Final Thoughts and Gratitude

Guest host James Lott JR talks about Dana Indiana! 

Our 204th episode with a summary and discussion of last week's big AI news! Recorded on 03/21/2025 Hosted by Andrey Kurenkov and Jeremie Harris. Feel free to email us your questions and feedback at contact@lastweekinai.com and/or hello@gladstone.ai Read out our text newsletter and comment on the podcast at https://lastweekin.ai/. Join our Discord here! https://discord.gg/nTyezGSKwP In this episode: Baidu launched two new multimodal models, Ernie 4.5 and Ernie X1, boasting competitive pricing and capabilities compared to Western counterparts like GPT-4.5 and DeepSeek R1. OpenAI introduced new audio models, including impressive speech-to-text and text-to-speech systems, and added O1 Pro to their developer API at high costs, reflecting efforts for more profitability. Nvidia and Apple announced significant hardware advancements, including Nvidia's future GPU plans and Apple's new Mac Studio offering that can run DeepSeek R1. DeepSeek employees are facing travel restrictions, suggesting China is treating its AI development with increased secrecy and urgency, emphasizing a wartime footing in AI competition. Timestamps + Links: (00:00:00) Intro / Banter (00:01:36) News Preview Tools & Apps (00:02:50) Baidu launches two new versions of its AI model Ernie (00:10:46) OpenAI Unveils New Audio Models to Make AI Agents Sound More Human Than Ever (00:16:41) OpenAI's o1-pro is the company's most expensive AI model yet (00:20:53) Google brings a ‘canvas' feature to Gemini, plus Audio Overview (00:22:18) Anthropic adds web search to its Claude chatbot (00:23:55) xAI launches an API for generating images Applications & Business (00:26:28) Nvidia announces Rubin GPUs in 2026, Rubin Ultra in 2027, Feynman also added to roadmap (00:36:25) M3 Ultra Runs DeepSeek R1 With 671 Billion Parameters Using 448GB Of Unified Memory, Delivering High Bandwidth Performance At Under 200W Power Consumption, With No Need For A Multi-GPU Setup (00:40:07) Intel reaches 'exciting milestone' for 18A 1.8nm-class wafers with first run at Arizona fab (00:42:45) Elon Musk's AI company, xAI, acquires a generative AI video startup (00:44:44) Tencent Reportedly Makes Massive NVIDIA H20 Chip Purchase for WeChat's DeepSeek Integration Projects & Open Source (00:46:32) Anthropic's Not-So-Secret Weapon That's Giving Agents a Boost (00:50:50) Mistral AI drops new open-source model that outperforms GPT-4o Mini with fraction of parameters (00:53:30) EXAONE Deep: Reasoning Enhanced Language Models Research & Advancements (00:55:58) Sample, Scrutinize and Scale: Effective Inference-Time Search by Scaling Verification (01:07:44) Block Diffusion: Interpolating Between Autoregressive and Diffusion Language Models (01:12:27) Communication-Efficient Language Model Training Scales Reliably and Robustly: Scaling Laws for DiLoCo (01:18:46) Transformers without Normalization (01:19:52) Measuring AI Ability to Complete Long Tasks (01:26:12) HCAST: Human-Calibrated Autonomy Software Tasks Policy & Safety (01:26:45) Announcing Zochi, an Intology Project (01:32:46) DeepSeek, a National Treasure in China, is Now Being Closely Guarded (01:37:02) Claude Sonnet 3.7 (often) knows when it's in alignment evaluations Synthetic Media & Art (01:42:27) US appeals court rejects copyrights for AI-generated art lacking 'human' creator (01:45:10) Trump urged by Ben Stiller, Paul McCartney and hundreds of stars to protect AI copyright rules

Join the Daily Rewind - Join.Classic Baseball Broadcasts - reconnect with baseball history.Mentioned in this episode:Classic Baseball Broadcasts

Hip hop artist ‪SkyBlew‬ joins us to talk about his latest album, and later Ernie & Carter discuss the news about Marvel's Daredevil: Cold Day in Hell & Marvel Knights: The World to Come (1:32:00).Buy SkyBlew's latest album, SkyBlew x DJ Reimei - Battle for the Universe here: https://skyblew1.bandcamp.com/album/skyblew-x-dj-reimei-battle-for-the-universeGet 33% off your 1-Year Subscription at @GlobalComix using my link & promo code to read their entire digital comics library that now includes DC, Image Comics, Dynamite Comics, Boom Studios!, Vault Comics, ONI Press, AWA, and more!https://globalcomix.com/lp/promos/uf/blerdwithoutfear

Belief is important. Belief that Jesus is the Word, the Light, the Son of God, Christ, Lamb of God, King of Israel, and Son of Man.

China's Baidu dropped new AI models at prices far below competitors like OpenAI and DeepSeek. Baidu's Ernie model matches GPT-4.5 at only 1% of its cost, kicking off a significant AI price war. Before that in the Headlines, Apple's AI strategy is officially a dumpster fire. SPECIAL OFFERTo get your ready-to-go agent from https://www.lindy.ai/ email nlw@besuper.ai with the word "LINDY" in the titleBrought to you by:KPMG – Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.kpmg.us/ai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn more about how KPMG can help you drive value with our AI solutions.Vanta - Simplify compliance - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://vanta.com/nlwThe Agent Readiness Audit from Superintelligent - Go to https://besuper.ai/ to request your company's agent readiness score.The AI Daily Brief helps you understand the most important news and discussions in AI. Subscribe to the podcast version of The AI Daily Brief wherever you listen: https://pod.link/1680633614Subscribe to the newsletter: https://aidailybrief.beehiiv.com/Join our Discord: https://bit.ly/aibreakdown

The Electric State, Kill Switches, Baidu's AI, Scopely, Careless People, Gemini Robotics An arbitrator instructs a former Meta employee to stop promoting and publishing her book alleging company misconduct; publisher Flatiron Books earlier objected DeepMind's latest AI model can help robots fold origami and close Ziploc bags Future Today Strategy Group, or FTSG. Intel has a new CEO Russo Brothers' Busy, Boring Netflix Sci-Fi Directors Anthony and Joe Russo say they're building a high-tech studio aiming to help artists use AI as a creative tool to make films, shows, and video games Baidu launches two new versions of its AI model Ernie Startup Claims Its Upcoming (RISC-V ISA) Zeus GPU is 10X Faster Than Nvidia's RTX 5090 Pokemon Go is getting a new owner after almost 9 years with Niantic Developer convicted for "kill switch" code activated upon his termination TikTok will play 'calming music' to remind teens to stop using the app F-35 kill switch concerns non-US countries Firmware update bricks HP printers, makes them unable to use HP cartridges Sonos Cancels Its Streaming Video Player - Slashdot Everything You Say To Your Echo Will Be Sent To Amazon Starting On March 28 Musk-led cuts drive US consumer protection agency to ask for Amazon trial delay Host: Leo Laporte Guests: Amy Webb, Glenn Fleishman, and Mikah Sargent Download or subscribe to This Week in Tech at https://twit.tv/shows/this-week-in-tech Join Club TWiT for Ad-Free Podcasts! Support what you love and get ad-free shows, a members-only Discord, and behind-the-scenes access. Join today: https://twit.tv/clubtwit Sponsors: zscaler.com/security shopify.com/twit joindeleteme.com/twit promo code TWIT ZipRecruiter.com/Twit uscloud.com

The Electric State, Kill Switches, Baidu's AI, Scopely, Careless People, Gemini Robotics An arbitrator instructs a former Meta employee to stop promoting and publishing her book alleging company misconduct; publisher Flatiron Books earlier objected DeepMind's latest AI model can help robots fold origami and close Ziploc bags Future Today Strategy Group, or FTSG. Intel has a new CEO Russo Brothers' Busy, Boring Netflix Sci-Fi Directors Anthony and Joe Russo say they're building a high-tech studio aiming to help artists use AI as a creative tool to make films, shows, and video games Baidu launches two new versions of its AI model Ernie Startup Claims Its Upcoming (RISC-V ISA) Zeus GPU is 10X Faster Than Nvidia's RTX 5090 Pokemon Go is getting a new owner after almost 9 years with Niantic Developer convicted for "kill switch" code activated upon his termination TikTok will play 'calming music' to remind teens to stop using the app F-35 kill switch concerns non-US countries Firmware update bricks HP printers, makes them unable to use HP cartridges Sonos Cancels Its Streaming Video Player - Slashdot Everything You Say To Your Echo Will Be Sent To Amazon Starting On March 28 Musk-led cuts drive US consumer protection agency to ask for Amazon trial delay Host: Leo Laporte Guests: Amy Webb, Glenn Fleishman, and Mikah Sargent Download or subscribe to This Week in Tech at https://twit.tv/shows/this-week-in-tech Join Club TWiT for Ad-Free Podcasts! Support what you love and get ad-free shows, a members-only Discord, and behind-the-scenes access. Join today: https://twit.tv/clubtwit Sponsors: zscaler.com/security shopify.com/twit joindeleteme.com/twit promo code TWIT ZipRecruiter.com/Twit uscloud.com

The Electric State, Kill Switches, Baidu's AI, Scopely, Careless People, Gemini Robotics An arbitrator instructs a former Meta employee to stop promoting and publishing her book alleging company misconduct; publisher Flatiron Books earlier objected DeepMind's latest AI model can help robots fold origami and close Ziploc bags Future Today Strategy Group, or FTSG. Intel has a new CEO Russo Brothers' Busy, Boring Netflix Sci-Fi Directors Anthony and Joe Russo say they're building a high-tech studio aiming to help artists use AI as a creative tool to make films, shows, and video games Baidu launches two new versions of its AI model Ernie Startup Claims Its Upcoming (RISC-V ISA) Zeus GPU is 10X Faster Than Nvidia's RTX 5090 Pokemon Go is getting a new owner after almost 9 years with Niantic Developer convicted for "kill switch" code activated upon his termination TikTok will play 'calming music' to remind teens to stop using the app F-35 kill switch concerns non-US countries Firmware update bricks HP printers, makes them unable to use HP cartridges Sonos Cancels Its Streaming Video Player - Slashdot Everything You Say To Your Echo Will Be Sent To Amazon Starting On March 28 Musk-led cuts drive US consumer protection agency to ask for Amazon trial delay Host: Leo Laporte Guests: Amy Webb, Glenn Fleishman, and Mikah Sargent Download or subscribe to This Week in Tech at https://twit.tv/shows/this-week-in-tech Join Club TWiT for Ad-Free Podcasts! Support what you love and get ad-free shows, a members-only Discord, and behind-the-scenes access. Join today: https://twit.tv/clubtwit Sponsors: zscaler.com/security shopify.com/twit joindeleteme.com/twit promo code TWIT ZipRecruiter.com/Twit uscloud.com

The Electric State, Kill Switches, Baidu's AI, Scopely, Careless People, Gemini Robotics An arbitrator instructs a former Meta employee to stop promoting and publishing her book alleging company misconduct; publisher Flatiron Books earlier objected DeepMind's latest AI model can help robots fold origami and close Ziploc bags Future Today Strategy Group, or FTSG. Intel has a new CEO Russo Brothers' Busy, Boring Netflix Sci-Fi Directors Anthony and Joe Russo say they're building a high-tech studio aiming to help artists use AI as a creative tool to make films, shows, and video games Baidu launches two new versions of its AI model Ernie Startup Claims Its Upcoming (RISC-V ISA) Zeus GPU is 10X Faster Than Nvidia's RTX 5090 Pokemon Go is getting a new owner after almost 9 years with Niantic Developer convicted for "kill switch" code activated upon his termination TikTok will play 'calming music' to remind teens to stop using the app F-35 kill switch concerns non-US countries Firmware update bricks HP printers, makes them unable to use HP cartridges Sonos Cancels Its Streaming Video Player - Slashdot Everything You Say To Your Echo Will Be Sent To Amazon Starting On March 28 Musk-led cuts drive US consumer protection agency to ask for Amazon trial delay Host: Leo Laporte Guests: Amy Webb, Glenn Fleishman, and Mikah Sargent Download or subscribe to This Week in Tech at https://twit.tv/shows/this-week-in-tech Join Club TWiT for Ad-Free Podcasts! Support what you love and get ad-free shows, a members-only Discord, and behind-the-scenes access. Join today: https://twit.tv/clubtwit Sponsors: zscaler.com/security shopify.com/twit joindeleteme.com/twit promo code TWIT ZipRecruiter.com/Twit uscloud.com

“Well, shit, this one just straight-up broke the four of us…” - Andrew On this week's episode, Listener Request Month kicks our ass as we're forced to watch and talk about the dreadful hitman comedy, 8 Heads in a Duffel Bag! How awful are all the attempts at joke writing in this script? How many cross-country flights is Joe Pesci taking in this movie? Who wanted to be here less, Pesci or David Spade? And how dare they show the grandmother in a body cast at the end, that woman is dead! PLUS: No way this laundry woman is wrapping that head, folks!  8 Heads in a Duffle Bag stars Joe Pesci, Andy Comeau, Kristy Swanson, George Hamilton, Dyan Cannon, Todd Louiso, Anthony Mangano, Joe Basile, Ernestine Mercer, Frank Roman, Howard George, and David Spade as Ernie; directed by Tom Schulman. This episode is brought to you in part by Factor! Eat smart with Factor. Get started at FACTOR MEALS dot com slash FACTORPODCAST and use code FACTORPODCAST to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping. That's code FACTORPODCAST at FACTOR MEALS dot com slash FACTORPODCAST to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. Tickets are on sale now for our three-night residency during the Oxford Comedy Festival! We'll be doing six shows over three nights from July 18 through 20, doing shows like WHM, W❤️M, The Nexus, The Gleep Glossary, and Animation Damnation! Tickets are going fast, so friends over there, snag your tix!  Throughout 2025, we'll be donating 100% of our earnings from our merch shop to the Center for Reproductive Rights. So head over and check out all these masterful designs and see what tickles your fancy! Shirts? Phone cases? Canvas prints? We got all that and more! Check it out and kick in for a good cause! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

Bruce Pearl enters The Steam Room to somehow get Charles even more fired-up about Auburn heading into March Madness, and to discuss whether the SEC may be even tougher in basketball than football this year. Ernie and Chuck talk Timothée Chalamet, embarrassing moments, perfect days, and the worst time to raise ticket prices. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Subscribe to The Best Idea Yet here: https://wondery.com/links/the-best-idea-yet/Once upon a time, American kids had a problem—OK, two. They were watching way, WAY too much TV and they were falling way, way behind in school. But then a trailblazing producer and her psychologist friend asked a bold question: What if we used the first problem to solve the second? The result: Sesame Street, home of Big Bird, Cookie Monster, Bert & Ernie, and a social-media superstar named Elmo. Since Sesame Street's debut in 1969—the same year as the moon landing!—the show's helped educate more than 150 million kids in 70 different languages while breaking racial barriers along the way. It's also taught us the meaning of friendship, the value of neighbors, and the joy of a good rubber ducky. And it was only possible thanks to audacious creators, educators, and one shaggy-looking puppeteer named James Maury Henson (but you can call him Jim). Learn about Kermit The Frog's commercial past, why the only bets worth making are contrarian ones, and why Sesame Street is the best idea yet.Subscribe to The Best Idea Yet for the untold origin stories of the products you're obsessed with — and the bold risk takers who made them go viral.Episodes drop every Tuesday, listen here: https://wondery.com/links/the-best-idea-yet/—-----------------------------------------------------GET ON THE POD: Submit a shoutout or fact: https://tboypod.com/shoutouts FOR MORE NICK & JACK: Newsletter: https://tboypod.com/newsletter Connect with Nick: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolas-martell/ Connect with Jack: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jack-crivici-kramer/ SOCIALS:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tboypod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@tboypodYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tboypod Anything else: https://tboypod.com/ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

General Martin Dempsey enters The Steam Room for an enlightening conversation about leadership, his role as Chairman of USA Basketball, and embracing the concept of ‘creative friction'. Ernie and Charles give flowers to Diana Taurasi, discuss their favorite Oscar nominees, debate the duality of Kenny Smith, and the Chuckster tells a story about how he was almost traded to the Lakers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

#586: If you are a complete beginner at finances, or if you know someone who is, this episode is for you. The biggest hurdle for beginners? Money seems complex and intimidating. But Scott Yamamura, author of Financial Epiphany, explains personal finance doesn't have to be complicated. He breaks compound interest into three easy-to-grasp frameworks: Money as a Multiplying Ability: Just like athletes have peak physical abilities in their 20s, your money has its greatest multiplying power when you're young. At age 22, every dollar invested can multiply 16 times by retirement (assuming a 40-year career and 7.2 percent returns). The Doubling Framework: Money can double approximately every 10 years with average market returns. This explains why a dollar invested at 22 becomes $2 by 32, $4 by 42, $8 by 52, and $16 by 62. The Halving Concept: With each decade that passes, your money's multiplying power gets cut in half. This is the inverse of the above idea. Scott shares how these simple frameworks helped him front-load his son's college savings. "We can stop now because it's going to double," he said. For beginners struggling with analysis paralysis, Scott offers a Rubik's Cube analogy: You don't need to understand all 43 quintillion possible combinations to solve it — you just need one simple method to get started. Similarly, you don't need to master every financial concept to begin investing. The most important step is just to get started. You can learn the complexities later, but starting early gives your money more time to grow. Scott also emphasizes finding your "why" — a purpose bigger than just accumulating wealth. He shares a moving story about a man named Ernie who funded his mission trip to Sierra Leone, showing how money can be used to make a profound difference in people's lives. Timestamps: Note: Timestamps will vary on individual listening devices based on dynamic advertising run times. The provided timestamps are approximate and may be several minutes off due to changing ad lengths. (0:00) Introduction  (1:16) Scott discusses reframing compound interest as "money multiplying ability" (3:47) Money multiplying power works like athletic ability - strongest when young (7:02) Scott addresses challenges of saving when young and broke (10:29) Explanation of the Rule of 72 for doubling money (13:43) Every dollar invested at 22 multiplies 16x by retirement (17:08) What to do if you're starting late with retirement savings (20:44) Three core ideas of compound interest (23:19) Using the concept of "halving" to create urgency to invest (30:30) Finding your "why" to overcome financial temptations (33:07) Scott shares personal story about Sierra Leone mission trip (36:46) The joy of spontaneous giving as motivation for building wealth (40:53) Balancing retirement savings with paying off debt (43:38) Simplifying finance through the Rubik's Cube analogy (52:50) Paula's wrap-up with actionable investing advice for beginners For more information, visit the show notes at https://affordanything.com/episode586 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when a simple child's toy refuses to follow the rules of science? A skeptical software engineer recounts his chilling experience with “Ernie's Car,” a Sesame Street-themed toy that seemed to have a mind of its own. From unexplained noises in the middle of the night to the shocking discovery that the car had been operating without any batteries, this is a story that will make even the most rational minds question reality. Was it a glitch, a freak electrical phenomenon, or something far more unsettling?  If you have a real ghost story or supernatural event to report, please write into our show or call 1-855-853-4802! If you like the show, please help keep us on the air and support the show by becoming a Premium Subscriber.  Subscribe here: http://www.ghostpodcast.com/?page_id=118 or at or at http://www.patreon.com/realghoststories Watch more at: http://www.realghoststoriesonline.com/ Follow Tony: Instagram: HTTP://www.instagram.com/tonybrueski TikToc: https://www.tiktok.com/@tonybrueski Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tony.brueski