But I'm Still A Good Person by Vince Nicholas

skeleton broth & electrolytes - all a growing boy needs

Hotels: Give us $18k and you can have free drinks, free food and a comped hotel room.Us: Okay.

For nearly 3 days i only drank electrolytes and bone broth

we got our condo deep cleaned

i also watched the housemaid, neighbors, landman, wonderman, taylor swift: end of an era & the fantastic Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins

ima give u a discount cuz u have a nice face

also: Great Clips, Great Silence; i didn't correct an egregious math error; i threw our garbage into our neighbor's trash can; why does the post office charge a handling fee?; did someone say Costco?; hot breaf & Grandma Thien's Consumer Tip o' the Week.

when you ask for more napkins and they give you 3.. plus, we watched that movie project hail mary

also, i lifted with a cat

but we got 1 anyway, and life will never be the same..

also: someone threatened to call animal control on Curious Claire, Frankie's been getting intimate with our bar stool handles & Carolyn wanted to steal i mean take 4 books from our condo lil' library

and then mamma took me to grammar School, But I stopped off in the vestibule

i haggled, i bartered, i negotiated like Costanza

walmart scan & go is more like scan 'n dont go, amrite?!?

the Cool whip overcharge

skip to 8:01 to hear me do my impression of the deep voice guy in boyz II men

i do jeff timmons really good & i also read spencer pratt's book

also, why do they make us change our passwords at work and our wifi went out

Eating soup while standing up.

crouching tiger, hidden groin pain

Ikea's transgressions 1-5 against us loading.. no cake, half hour standing in line, 1 cashier open, waiting on lingonberry & wait til Carolyn tells you about the toilet paper

also, costco pizza don't be answerin' no phone

also, vince's loud snoring is keeping Carolyn up & our supermarket bagger put our eggs at the bottom of our parcel

im not in my peak furniture building years

i also played the ol' wait-it-out game at the Gross Out and won!

Lennox turned the big one-fo'

Whining will get you everywhere, my friends

Sesame oil does not belong in the potato chip aisle, Meineke continues to suck & Swedish grounds

we also watched The Cult Behind the Killer: The Andrea Yates Story & Kidnapped: Elizabeth Smart

Also: she finally broke up with Hazi, she cut and coloured her own hair, we watched Claire toy with a mouse & Carolyn took civic action!

also: where the fat tastes good & i watched that movie Train Dreams

also.. when did we become better than ground pepper, i walk up to the drive-up ATM, bone-in boneless ham, $25 shampoo, $1 a pound ground beef & this is my Graceland, sir

a barefoot Jeff Bridges , the villain uses AOL instant messenger & separating the art from the artist

also: the 30 minute drive of shame back to Citrus Heights & reaching 3rd base in cat.

We volunteered to give out food to those in need in 34 degree weather at 7AM on a Saturday

i also watched running man (horrible) and sisu 2 (fun!)

and bill is a real estate novelist!

remember to give youself some grave...

Also: my love language, beginning emails with Good Morning & beauty school never went

fun fact: my 7th grade science teacher mister bird was in top gun

the bathtub was on my mind..

aliexpress was temu b4 temu was temu, qmetxcqquu & we were forced to sing silent night

That's the sound of.. titillation

Many hours, few bowls; 5 good words, 5 bad words; & we ate 5 day old expired cheesecake.

also, powerball is for losers, so of course i played it

gym, crimes & misdemeanors

eating 2 year old gummies was not a good idea..

sean penn get sodomized need i say more?

Buying new towels tested our marriage like never before & Answering the towel questions you were too afraid to ask!

find me in the land of yellow stickers, fake snow on Frankie's fur & Charlie Brown was bullied

do not hesitate at a 4 way stop, getting a flu shot when you're an anti-vaxxer & i don't care about my spotify wrapped, why do u?