Podcasts about how do i talk

Nate Williams welcomes Chuck Mason onto the show to talk about his book How Do I Talk to My Kids about Social Justice?

Join Dawn and Steve in the Morning for a devotional from Blackaby Ministries International that explores John 8:32 and how the truth sets us free. In addition, author Chuck Mason will talk with us about his book How Do I Talk to my Kids about Social Justice?: Protecting Your Kids From the Woke Indoctrination of Public Schools. Chuck (BS Biology, MDiv) studied Post-Modern philosophy and its influence on faith and American culture while pursuing a Master of Divinity degree at Fuller Theological Seminary. He has devoted his intellectual life to tracking the challenges Postmodern philosophy and American Marxism have on the American political and cultural landscape, sharing his insights and educating throughout the area. He is an author, speaker, and podcaster. Chuck discusses the effect of contemporary Marxism on faith, culture, and politics in his podcast Battleground Ideas.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome back to the "RETHINKING OBESITY" podcast series. This is part three of five. In this episode, we cover what bloodwork and tests are expected in an obesity assessment. You will learn about important tests beyond BMI for a comprehensive obesity exam. It's not about pinpointing one hormone or factor that's solely responsible. Instead, it's a combination of multiple factors, which I discuss in this value-packed episode. While it may sound disappointing not to have a quick fix, the good news is that effective treatment is available. A comprehensive approach, including behavioral training, psychological support, and medical intervention, can yield positive and lasting results. Join me for part four of the RETHINKING OBESITY Series where I dive further into the pillar of treatments for obesity. Here's the topic overview of my 5-part series, RETHINKING OBESITY: What is Obesity?How Do I Talk to my Family Doctor about my Weight?What bloodwork and tests are expected for an Obesity Assessment?What are the pillars of treatment of Obesity?What Obesity Medications are Available in Canada? FOLLOW Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sashahighmd/Tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@sashahighmd WORK WITH ME Best Weight for Women - https://www.sashahighmd.com/bestweightRecover Strong for Binge Eating - https://www.sashahighmd.com/bed

Did you know that it takes an average of 11 years for individuals with obesity to discuss their weight with their healthcare provider? This was according to the Canadian ACTION Study in 2018. It also revealed that 74% of participants believed that obesity management was entirely the individual's responsibility. This common perception creates a significant barrier to effective treatment. This mindset leads to self-blame and the mistaken belief that more willpower, dieting, or exercise will magically solve the problem. Welcome back to the "RETHINKING OBESITY" podcast series. This is part two of five. In this episode, I dive into what I really mean when I say “your weight is not your fault” and how to effectively advocate for yourself. Obesity is not a character flaw or a lifestyle choice. It's a medical condition that deserves understanding, empathy, and effective treatment. Here's the topic overview of my 5-part series, RETHINKING OBESITY: What is Obesity? How Do I Talk to my Family Doctor about my Weight? What bloodwork and tests are expected for an Obesity assessment? What are the pillars of treatment of Obesity? What Obesity Medications are Available in Canada? FOLLOW Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sashahighmd/Tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@sashahighmdWORK WITH ME Best Weight for Women - https://www.sashahighmd.com/bestweightRecover Strong for Binge Eating - https://www.sashahighmd.com/bedWeight Loss for Men - https://www.sashahighmd.com/mens-weight-loss-coaching

In a world where truth seemed to be slipping away, Chuck Mason embarked on a quest to protect his children from the clutches of a dangerous ideology. Little did he know that his own journey of studying 'postmodern' philosophy would come full circle, as his children fell victim to the indoctrination of 'woke' beliefs. Now, he must confront the stark reality of his worst nightmare coming true, and he is determined to take action. Join us as we delve into the harrowing story of one man's battle against the infiltration of Marxist ideology in schools, and discover how it forever changed his perception of truth and the future.In this episode, you will be able to:Uncover the critical role that social justice plays in both education and parenting.Gain an understanding of the infiltration of Marxist thought into educational institutes.Grasp the alarming growth of emotion-driven decision-making over the objective pursuit of truth.Discern the striking intersection of Marxist ideology and Critical Race Theory.Decipher how fathers can serve as guardians, defending their children from overwhelming woke indoctrination.My special guest is Chuck MasonHistorically informed and forward-thinking, our guest, Chuck Mason, brings a unique perspective to our discussion. He embarked on his theological pursuits at Fuller Seminary, joining the MDiv program. Although he was immersed in studying theology, Chuck took a detour into the construction industry—infusing his spiritual path with pragmatic skillsets in an entirely different field. Armed with key insights from his philosophy classes, he developed an affinity for understanding postmodern culture and its effects on today's generation. Today, based on his personal journey as a parent witnessing the influence of woke culture on his boys, he's dedicated towards educating parents and wrote his book, How Do I Talk to My Kids about Social Justice?How to find Chuck Mason's "How to talk to your kids about social justice" Book and Social Media:Website: Battleground: IdeasTwitter: @BTTLEGRNDideasFacebook: Battleground: IdeasSupport the showConsider supporting the podcast! Click the link above "support the show" and with your support Chaos & Christ will be able to grow, bring on new guest and provide greater quality content that can serve you in the midst of Chaos. Sign up for our Newsletter! Chaos & Christ Newsletter Official Website: Chaos & Christ Podcast official websiteAffiliate LinksAll links below are services and/or products I used and trust that I recommended because I myself use them. Yes they pay me a small percentage for the purchase you make on this link. You obviously do not have too but I mean, if you are going to buy it anyway, could you help a brother out? My Podcast Website This is how I built my podcast website in like 10 minutes- (Affiliate link) Social Media:Instagram: @alexsyfelix Facebook: @chaosandchristpodcastTwitter/X: @alexsy_felix Gab: @alexsyfelix This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chaosandchrist.substack.com

Today's Hump Day question: How Do I Talk to My Spouse About Children? ------ For all links mentioned in the episode & more XO content, visit: https://linktr.ee/nakedmarriage Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A conversation with TEENS- My 17 & 15 year old share their thoughts. If you're wondering How Do I Talk to my Teen? (Without rage!) Check out Mom & Teen Reel Talk. We help you have those FUN and meaningful conversations. So exciting to have the opportunity to have Angi and her family have a Reel talk about two very nuanced characters in NHIE Ben and Paxton. They both have unique personalities and struggles and the layers are fun to reveal and talk about. We can like and love so many different people for many different reasons. This is the richness of people that we get to discover. If you want a big, fun life with less worry, overwhelm and anxiety so that you can be super-connected with your children and really keep then close and safe DM or contact us and see how I can help. If you want to know more about what it would be like to work together, get in touch for a free consultation. I can help you have the worry free big joyous life that will really keep your family safe through stronger connections. For a joyous life and more conversations: Contact Nikki Contact Angi As We Go You Go! xo Dr. Nikki and Angi #howdoItalktomyteen? #raisingteens #emotionalthinkingforteens #motherdaughterbonding #teenTV #teendramadiscussion #avoidtheteendrama #parenting #parentingteens #moms #moms'ofteens #anxiety #worry #overwhelm #fightingwithyourteens #connectingwithyourteens #tweens #parentingtweens #momsoftweens #nikkineretin #drnikkineretin #teenlines #neverhaveiever #angisolley

Sophia and Sistine Stallone join us at our HQ. We drink beers and ask them questions sent in by you guys. Their drink of choice.... Pacifico, Peroni and Funky Buddha. Couldn't find the Funky Buddha so we went with Allagash White instead.  00:00 - Intro 05:03 - Which One of You Guys Run Your Fan Account? 08:01 - How Would Both of You Approach the Problem of Over Population? 10:14 - Have You Ever Been in Love? What's It Like? 14:06 - How Do I Talk to Girls? 18:19 - What's the Creepiest DM You've Received? 19:23 - Why Does Sistine Have More Followers Than Sophia? 20:44 - What's Your Favorite Non-Sylvester Stallone Movie?  22:08 - Is Rocky the Best?  22:34 - When Did You Guys Realize Your Dad Was Famous?  26:27 - Pros and Cons of Having Famous Parents? 27:15 - What's a Stallone Family Vacation Like?  37:41 - Rapid Fire Questions.  41:24 - Banana Boat.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Real Talk: How Do I Talk to My Teenager About Sex, Drugs, and Peer Pressure?  FREE PDF INLCUDED IN SHOW NOTES! FREE PDF MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST:  https://theimpactfulparent.com/50things  50 Skills to teach your teenager before they leave home and go off to college! Don't forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don't miss an impactful tip! Follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube. Transcripts: Please, oh please!  Let my child make good decisions next year when they are at college! I get it.  I have a senior in High school too.  I am already terrified of my son facing the world, but as an Impactful Parent, I also know that I have to let go, and I can't avoid the difficult conversation of Sex, Drugs, and Peer Pressure.   This goes for you, too!   Being a good parent means preparing our children to leave the nest. Part of that preparation is having the uncomfortable talk about what inevitably lies ahead, so your child is ready.  Let's break it down.  What do you need to talk about?  There are 3 big topics.  They are Sex, Drugs, and Peer pressure.   Why?  Because statistics show that changing environments, being alone, or feeling isolated can make people more vulnerable.  College has the potential to hit all 3 of these marks!  This vulnerability is amplified by a young person's need to be liked, fit in, and make friends.  Plus, if your child has low self-esteem, then the risk is even greater.  I know that you might be thinking, "I already had the birds and bees talk with my child years ago, and we've talked about drugs and alcohol too." Well, I am here to tell you that you need to take those conversations further.  Now it is essential to talk about the social responsibility of sex and drugs.  Things like: What does responsible consumption look like, or responsible sexual activity? How to set boundaries. how to deal with peer pressure Yep, I know!  Tough conversations!  So you might be saying, How Do I Talk to My Teenager About Sex, Drugs, and Peer Pressure? Here are 10 tips for what to say and how this conversation should flow.  Real Talk Tip 1: Start by telling them why you are sitting them down.  Say something like, "Being in a new environment where you want to fit in can push you to do things for the approval of others.  You are an adult now, and ultimately you are responsible for choices.  I want to help you get ready for the new peer pressures you are about to face.   Here are some tips, so you do not do anything regretful. Real Talk Tip 2:  Practice saying no.  In your head, aloud, or with your friends, practice being assertive and saying no.  Roleplay it out in your mind how you will say no and what will happen.  Kids forget that they must talk not only with their words but also with their bodies.  Body language is what drives the point home.  Practice not only saying the words but standing tall and feeling confident.  Real Talk Tip 3:  Make a plan before you get into a bad situation.   Decide what you will do if you go to a party and everyone wants you to drink or do drugs.  Decide what you will do if a guy touches you without asking.  Decide what you will do if your intoxicated and need to get home or out of a situation.   Decide what you will do if your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to take the relationship to a place, you are not comfortable with.     Please discuss lots of different scenarios with your child or explain to them that having a plan BEFORE they need helps keep them safe and sets them up for a more successful outcome.   Real Talk Tip 4:  Decide your limits before you go.  What are you willing to do, and what do you want to avoid?   Knowing your boundaries BEFORE you put yourself in an environment where peers can pressure you to change your mind will help you keep your values and keep your integrity.   You do not want to make decisions at the moment.  That is how regretful actions happen.   Know your boundaries before you even step outside the door. Real Talk Tip 5:  Be ready to leave.  Have a plan for leaving if the situation gets uncomfortable.   Hopefully, you will be with people who can do what they want and still respect you for your choices, but many times that is not the case.  You may have to leave even if you do not want to; parents are no longer an excuse to get out of the situation, so have another reason ready to go.  Maybe this is a friend. Perhaps this is a lie about being on medication so you cannot drink, but talk about possible excuses NOW with your child, so they do not fumble with their words later. Real Talk Tip 6:   Pick your friends wisely.   Find friends with the same values and stick together.   Using the buddy system is a great way to get out of uncomfortable situations.  Have a friend that you trust. Be willing to watch over each other.  Real Talk Tip 7:  Trust your gut.    Tell your child that if it does not feel right, then it is not right.  Your instincts are one of the best indicators for trouble.  Trust yourself and your intuition. Real Talk Tip 8:   Consider how your actions can put you in a bad situation.  Please remind your child that they have the power to influence their environment.   Their choice of clothing, the way they act, what they consume, what they say, who they hang out with, …. All play a part in how their environment is created.   There are many moving parts to each situation we put ourselves in, but ultimately, little decisions can make considerable influences on how the day plays out. Do not discount those small choices that have the power to change outcomes. Real Talk Tip 9:  It is ok to be alone and standing up for yourself can sometimes be lonely.   The world's most extraordinary people had to stand alone in their convictions before anyone would accept them and follow.   Reaffirm to your child that it is ok to go against the grain and be alone.  It just means they have not found their tribe yet.   Tell your child that being alone with integrity is much better than being accepted and regretting your actions. Real Talk Tip 10:  Show you trust your child to make the right choices and that you have complete confidence in their future.   This is important.  A mistake that many parents make is having this conversation with a tone of I know you are going to mess up.  Instead, keep telling your child that you believe in them, and you have to talk about this so you can feel better about being an impactful parent, NOT because you don't trust their choices.   Your child is more likely to make better choices when you believe in them because you will be raising their self-confidence and standards.  Low self-confidence can lead to a self-fulling prophecy.  I know this is not the conversation you want to have, but it is a conversation worth having!  And if these 10 tips today were not enough- I HAVE MORE!  Today, I am giving you a FREE PDF CHECKLIST of 50 Life Skills your child needs to learn before leaving home.  Get your free pdf by going to https://theimpactfulparent.com/50things.    It is our responsibility to prepare our child, and you are!  You are an impactful parent!  You got this! 

✔ "How Do I Talk to My Children About Race?" By: BBC News Date: June 6, 2021 https://youtu.be/Y_ax-W9TjZ0 ----------------- ✔ "Bigot Boat Burns After Taunting Others" (LGBTQIA+ Mariners) By: The Young Turks Date: June 5, 2021 https://youtu.be/2zAzwvwMSWo ------------------ #TerminatorDarkFate #DemonicBureaucracy #Karma #Saturn #SaturnRetrograde #RaceinAmerica #RaceinUnitedKingdom #SubtleRacism #WordWitches #WordWitchery #Spellcasting #DemonsinDeathThroes #Law #LegalSystem #Prejudice #PrideMonth #LGBTQIA #LGBT #Discrimination #Nepotism #Racism #SystematicRacism #Retribution #Judgment ------------------ ✨Metaphysical Life Mastery™ on SOUNDCLOUD: https://soundcloud.com/user-429774487

NEW EPISODES EVERY THURSDAY!

How Do I Talk to My Kids about the Gospel in Everyday Ways?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about the Gospel in Everyday Ways?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Abuse Prevention?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about the Importance of Both Women and Men?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about the Importance of Both Women and Men?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about the Importance of Both Women and Men?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about the Importance of Both Women and Men?

Have you given yourself time to truly reflect on the racism in this country? How about your own thought patterns that may not be completely positive? 2020 has turned into a year of reflection. With the additional time spent at home and alone, and the issues our world still faces, it would be a shame if we all didn’t grow at least some during this time.  Many are wanting this year to be behind us, but let’s not forget about the progress that often comes during challenges. As runners, we know growth doesn’t precede struggle, but this is true for our minds as well as our muscles.  Aaron and Joshua Potts are the voices behind the “2 Black Runners” podcast. They share their love for running and their perspective as black runners in a running world that is often overflowing with white runners. It is easy to fall in love with these two as they speak freely and passionately about what they love. The Black Running Community One of the first questions that Joshua and Aaron answered was, “Why are there fewer black runners?” Compared to many other sports, there is a very low representation of black athletes in long-distance running. Joshua and Aaron noticed this as they increased their distance and speed as they competed during middle school and high school.  As they thought about the question, Aaron and Joshua came up with several barriers and a few suggestions to attract more black athletes to long-distance running. One of the obvious issues with long-distance running is that it can be viewed as an elitist sport. For poor black Americans, running cannot be an attractive choice of sport because it doesn’t provide a monetary solution to their problems. Unlike football, basketball, and other popular sports, running doesn’t give multimillion-dollar contracts to its athletes. In that way, this type of running is a primarily white privilege. Aaron and Joshua also suggest that an increase in black coaches and black runner influencers could bolster black runners. Joshua, who is now a collegiate runner, says that running in college was the first time he had a seen a black running coach since he was coached by his dad. More black coaches during a child or teenager’s life that are reaching out and letting them know about the sport could make a major difference. When Aaron and Joshua grew up, they were influenced by their father to run because he knew it was a way for them to get scholarships. Running was a means for them to better their lives. Running doesn’t have to be an elitist or a sport only for white runners. In fact, it should be quite the opposite! How simple a sport it is, and yet we’ve allowed it to push away many potential runners.  On a broader scale, we can work to get 5Ks in black communities and put black runners on the covers of magazines. On a more personal level we can work to understand the barriers, and be supportive and inclusive of individuals. Something as simple as understanding how running affects someone with dreads, cornrows, or a weave can be important. These types of hairstyles take time, money, and are easily disturbed by exercise. Be aware. Be understanding. What are Microaggressions? There is a lot of learning and unlearning to be done by society, and you can help by doing so yourself and speaking up when you hear something inappropriate. Something that you can work to avoid and correct are microaggressions. Microaggressions are small statements that you may not perceive as offensive, but come off as such. They turn individuals into exhibits, and it’s something you should work to avoid. Examples of microaggressions include statements like, “You’re not like our other black friends,” “Can I touch your hair?” or “I’m so happy to have a black roommate.” Simply, these statements are showing these people that you view them as objects or tokens, more than individuals.  How Do I Talk to a Black Runner? Perhaps you want to be more inclusive towards black runners but are unsure how to go about it. According to Joshua and Aaron, it’s pretty simple, “Don’t be weird about it.”  You should talk to a black runner the same way you would talk to any runner. Talk to them because they are a runner, not because they are black. “Don’t think that you have to make that person your friend,” says Joshua, “Try to find something in common with them.” In the end, be kind and work to unlearn some things, but don’t be overly worried about saying things that are wrong. We all make mistakes. Trying to be better is the best way to be better.  Resources: 2 Black Runners Podcast Running Report YouTube Running Report Instagram Just Mercy Film Marielle Hall Interview Thank you to my wonderful sponsor Tracksmith and Taylormade for sponsoring this episode of the Running for Real Podcast. Tracksmith is a Boston based running clothing company that truly cares about the quality and care of their running clothes. Running can be a demanding lifestyle for our clothes, they definitely go through the wear and tear to where we may be purchasing new clothes constantly. Tracksmith designers truly work with the finest materials and think of you as a runner in mind with spots for your keys, phone, and fuel.  Go here to check out their 100 days of Summer email campaign where they talk about anything and everything running.  If you are interested into looking at the Tracksmith Fellowship, where they want to highlight stories of the runners our there through their talents other than runner. Go here to see more information.  You can get $15 off your purchase of $75 or more, click here and enter code FORREAL15.   Taylormade Child and Family Services is the black owned business that is being highlighted in this episode. I wanted to highlight Erica Tucker in all of the great work that she is doing for her community including Child & Adult Counseling, Family Counseling, Coping & Adjustments, Anger Management, Behavioral Modification, Depression, Anxiety, ADHD, Phase of Life Changes, and Relationship Issues. There are even one on one sessions and group sessions, and so much more, thank you Erica for all you are doing for your community and for this crazy time right now. Go here to show her some support for being there for her community.   Thanks for listening! I hope you enjoyed today's episode. To share your thoughts: Leave a note in the comment section below. Join the Running for Real Facebook Group and share your thoughts on the episode (or future guests you would like to hear from) Share this show on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, or Pinterest. To help out the show: Leave an honest review on iTunes. Your ratings and reviews will really help me climb up the iTunes rankings and I promise, I read every single one. Not sure how to leave a review or subscribe, you can find out here. Thank you to Aaron and Joshua, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the show.

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Safe Media Use?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Family Members with Different Beliefs?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Disabilities?

Each week Amy or Margaret answers a listener question. This week Amy tackles the question, "How Do I Talk to My Kids About Missing Milestone Events?" Submit your question- we might answer yours next! questions@whatfreshhellpodcast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Mental Health?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Mental Health?

How Do I Talk to My Kids about Mental Health?

How Do I Talk to My Kids About Sex? We answer that question on this week’s episode of Real Truth. Real Quick.

Welcome to my virtual therapy room! I’m Dr Lori Beth and this is Sex Spoken Here. Today we are talking about communication and sex. Many people find talking about sex very difficult. In my experience, heterosexual couples don’t spend much time talking about sex at the beginning of a relationship. Some have the ‘safe sex’ talk  but many others simply use condoms and avoid this talk.  Heterosexual couples who do talk about sex before having it come in three flavours: People who prefer kinky sex, people who become involved online (and don’t meet in person quickly), and people who have a sexually transmitted disease and are concerned they could pass it on.    Many gay men also don’t talk a lot about sex before having sex. But more are happy to talk about sex (at least have a safe sex conversation) than heterosexuals. The same is true for lesbian women.  Lots of people ask me what the problem is – you have sex, you enjoy sex – what is there to talk about? When you first fall for someone, the sexual energy is high – almost anything you do together sexually can feel good. You spend a lot of time thinking of your new partner, fantasizing about what you will do together. By the time you have sex, you are halfway or more to orgasm. What he does to you doesn’t matter so much. Lots of couples ignore when things don’t quite fit. Both women and men will fake orgasm so as not to hurt their partners.    Once the relationship settles down into a routine, things change.  Part of this is biochemical.  Research has highlighted that it only takes between 1 ½ minutes and 4 minutes to decide if you fancy someone. 55% of attraction is down to body language, 38% tone and speed of voice and only 7% as a result of what is said. When you first fall in love, you are driven by testosterone and oestrogen.  Then adrenaline, dopamine and serotonin play a crucial role in fostering your attraction. It is at this point when all you think of is your lover. Oxytocin and vasopressin encourage you to attach to your lover. These chemicals are around after you have sex so the more sex you have, the more you attach and bond. Then you enter routine relationship and these chemicals die down. This is the point at which couples report the beginnings of sexual issues. Usually this is between 6 months and 2 years in a relationship. This is the point at which talking about sex becomes important but if you have not talked about sex much before, it is the point where it becomes extremely hard to bring the subject up. If you tell your lover you aren’t reaching orgasm, you worry that they will be hurt and also that they will ask if you were faking until that point.  If there is something kinky that you really fancy doing, you worry that your partner will be disgusted or reject you.  Lots of couples settle into a routine of not talking about sex. Sex becomes something that happens in the same way, same day and sometimes even the same time. The longer the routine goes on without talking about things, the harder it is to talk about things.    Sometimes this means people live unhappily for years and then something happens that provokes them to get some help. Other times, one partner has an affair. Sometimes the couple then gets help and far more often the couple separates.  In my most memorable case, a couple was referred to me by a fertility doctor because they were arguing a lot and this doctor felt that they needed to learn to communicate. They had been undergoing fertility treatment for 9 months and no pregnancy had yet occurred.  I have always preferred to take a comprehensive history when I start working with people.  As part of this, I ask about sex life.   Margie told me that they don’t have sex. I asked when they stopped having sex and she replied ‘We have never had proper sex’.  I was a bit stumped.  I clarified ‘You haven’t had sexual intercourse’. And both said ‘yes’.  I asked if the doctors working with them knew and they replied ‘No.’ No one had ever explored this with them before. I asked how they knew they needed fertility treatment and Margie replied ‘Well I can’t get pregnant if he won’t fuck me can I?’  I agreed. In exploring their sex life, Ken admitted that he had never had penetrative sex with anyone. He told me that he could only reach orgasm through masturbation and that he had very specific fantasies that he was embarrassed to discuss.  Their sex life had been at the centre of their marital difficulties for years.  Margie told me that she had given up on ever having a sex life but was willing to live with this because she wasn’t very sexual anyway. What she was not willing to live with was not having a family. Margie desperately wanted a baby. At first they did not want to work on their sexual life at all as part of the couples work. They simply wanted to focus on learning to communicate so that they were not ‘being horrible’ to each other anymore. After working together for 6 months, they agreed to do some work on their sex life. In this case, most of the work was with Ken as he need helped to disclose his desires to his wife and to break out of the habit he had developed so that he could reach orgasm via other means. They stopped fertility treatment after 6 months of working with me as they had not achieved pregnancy and the expense was so great. After we worked on their sexual life for 8 months, they became pregnant through having sex and were thrilled to bits. Most of the work we did was on communication. We started with the basics. Know your own mind – Before you can communicate effectively, you have to know what you want to say. When it comes to talking about sex this means knowing what turns you on and what you want from your partner.  Be clear about your approach to the conversation. Conversations about sex feel very tricky. Part of this is usually a fear that your partner will be horrified and reject you. Part of this is often a fear that your partner will be hurt by what you are saying. If you are going to tell your partner that you would like her to do something different, she might wonder if you have been faking all along. If you are able to say that you want to try something different in a way that excites her, this is less likely to be the case. Say ‘I would love it if we could try having you on top’ instead of saying ‘I think I would find it easier to cum if you were on top’. If you have been having bad sex or avoiding sex for a while, it might help to try the approach out on someone other than your partner and get some feedback first. Make sure to take responsibility for your own feelings and experience. Use ‘I’ statements: ‘I like it when’ or ‘I don’t like it when’. Make sure to have this conversation in a safe time and space. There is nothing worse than starting a difficult conversation and being interrupted by phone calls, or an obligation. Make sure you have time for the conversation and that your partner has time for the conversation.  Turn off phones and other electronic devices unless it is absolutely necessary to leave them on. Make sure the space is free from distraction and safe from intrusion by others. Talk about positive things as well as negatives. Let your partner know you still find him very attractive if this is true. Tell your partner what she does that really works for you.  There are lots of fun ways to start conversations about sex that lower the tension. I have a list of questions about sex, sexuality and sensuality that I suggest people use to discover more about their own and their partners’ sexual interests. Instead of just working through these at home at the kitchen table, you could work through them in the bath together or while snuggled up in bed.  You could go out to dinner and work through some of the questions at dinner.  That adds the additional thrill of talking about sex in public. I suggest picking 4 or 5 questions to work on at a time. When you find a topic that excites both of you, consider setting a date to explore it deeper. For example, one of the questions is ‘Have you ever tried bondage and if so what kind?  If not, does any kind of restraint appeal to you?’  If you discover that using handcuffs appeals to you both, talk about how you would like to use them. Agree what your limits would be. Go shopping for the handcuffs together. Create the scene in which you will try them. Are you going to role play? Or are you simply going to cuff your partner to the bedpost? Once you agree how you will do it, schedule the date.  Also schedule a time afterwards to talk about how it went and what you want to do next. Andrea and Nancy came into coaching with me to spice up their relationship.  They described the first 6 months of their relationship as super hot and then both reported that things had become stale. Andrea admitted that she went along with what Nancy wanted to do from the beginning because things were so hot that she was willing to do whatever Nancy wanted. A year down the line and Andrea was flirting with other women online and was worried about the temptation. Nancy was spending more and more time at work and felt the relationship was taking an inevitable course towards separation. In order to turn up the heat, both agreed that any routine sex was off the table for the next month. They agreed to explore sexual and sensual possibilities two to three times a week. They scheduled conversations and dates in their diaries.  They agreed that no possible activity was off limits and that they would not judge each other.  To prepare for the first conversation, they both made a list of sexual activities they were interested in trying. They also highlighted things they had already done and enjoyed. I encouraged them to bring erotic material to the conversations. Andrea started first and brought an erotic short story with her called ‘Telepaths Don’t Need Safewords’ by Celia Tan. It is an erotic science fiction story with themes of dominance and submission. Andrea suggested that she read the story to Nancy and then they talk about what they liked and didn’t like.  They came to the next session all fired up. Nancy said that she found the story extremely exciting and Andrea was relieved. They agreed to try out a couple of things based on the story and found it almost impossible to stick to the no full sex rule. By the time the month was over, Nancy and Andrea had a bunch of new sexual interests and were having regular conversations about sex and intimacy. Their relationship was stronger than it had ever been and they were behaving like newlyweds again. Regular conversations about your relationship and your intimate life are essential to keeping your relationship alive and well and exciting in the long term. Boredom is toxic to a relationship but it need not ever be an issue as long as you keep talking about your sexual life and are willing to explore.  Your mind is where arousal starts. Conversation ignites your passion through your mind.  If you find talking difficult, start by writing to each other. Sometimes I suggest couples use erotica (films, images, books, short stories) to illustrate their desires.  It gives you the opportunity to see how your partner might respond without disclosing all of your desires. It lowers the risk of rejection.  Darrell and Grant started their relationship as a casual one. They met at a club and had sex that first night. For the next 6 months, they had lots of sex and lots of fun. After 6 months they began to go out on proper dates, discovering they had a lot more in common than good sex. They were completely surprised after a year when they began to find their sex life dwindling.  They both still had strong sex drives but they found themselves finding excuses to avoid sex. They came to see me after Grant had a quick sexual encounter with another guy.  Darrell had already worked through the feelings of betrayal and recommitted to each other.  They came specifically to work on their sex life so it would not happen again.  We started by exploring their ultimate turn-ons.  Both of them mentioned anonymous sex. By definition, one cannot have anonymous sex with one’s lover. We started looking at what parts of anonymous sex were so exciting.  Both stated the aspect of surprise was the most exciting.  After some thought, they decided to try some anonymous sex with each other by inviting a third person to join them. This brought the excitement back into their relationship.  They told me that they had a great time with the three some but also replayed it when they had sex alone. This experience gave them the confidence to experiment with more new activities.  Some were a great success and others didn’t work for both of them. They agreed that they needed things to work for both of them in order for them to pursue the activity.  Some couples find they don’t agree on turn ons.  When this is the case, communication is essential to find solutions that make both people happy.  If solutions cannot be found, communication is even more important when deciding to separate so that an amicable separation can be achieved.  Usually, talking about sex leads to hotter sex and more sex.    Thanks for joining me this week for Sex Spoken Here with Dr Lori Beth Bisbey.  Write to me with suggestions for the show, questions you want answered at drbisbey@the-intimacy-coach.com, follow me on twitter @drbisbey. For a free 30 minute strategy session with me, go to www.the-intimacy-coach.com and click the button that says Schedule Now!  I look forward to seeing you next week when the topic is How Do I Talk to my Children about Sex?.

It seems that we can’t stop talking about sex! This week’s episode is our response to Episode 16: How Do I Talk to My Kids About Sex?, where we heard from several young adults who shared how their parents failed or succeeded in teaching them about sex. This time we also respond to a few […] The post Let’s Talk Sex…Again – HIRL Episode 21 appeared first on Ultimate Homeschool Podcast Network.