RAW Recovery Podcast

This episode of The Daily Trudge was originally recorded on May 31st, 2021, and is being shared again as a throwback while new live episodes are on pause. In this reflection, we talk about courage — not the loud, chest-puffing kind, but the quiet, hard-earned courage that comes from survival. The kind of courage learned in addiction, refined in recovery, and redirected toward usefulness and service. This episode touches on open and closed meetings, responsibility to newcomers, humility, and the idea that recovery was freely given — and therefore must remain freely available. It challenges the idea of ownership in recovery and reminds us that helping others isn't about control, ego, or exclusivity. In this episode, we explore: The difference between survival courage and spiritual courage Why recovery isn't something we “own” Open vs. closed meetings and common misunderstandings Responsibility to newcomers and those reaching out for help Using the courage learned in addiction for something constructive How God often speaks through other people Letting go of pride, anger, and control Why stopping the fight was the turning point Translating pain into purpose and usefulness This is an honest, unscripted look at recovery lived in real time — distractions, interruptions, imperfections and all — reminding us that recovery doesn't require polish, only willingness. Originally recorded on May 31st, 2021. Thank you for being here, whether you're watching live or catching the rewatch. No one trudges alone.

This episode of The Daily Trudge was originally recorded on May 9th, 2021, and it's being shared again as a throwback during a short break from live episodes. In this reflection, I talk openly about triggers, family boundaries, emotional fallout, and how even years into sobriety, old wounds can still surface. Recovery doesn't make us immune to life — it teaches us how to walk through it without drinking, even when things hit deeper than expected. We dig into fear, courage, humility, and the illusion of “whistling in the dark” — pretending we're okay when we're not. Drawing directly from the Big Book, this episode explores the loneliness alcohol creates, the obsession to recapture the past, and the dangerous in-between space where we can't imagine life either with alcohol or without it. In this episode, we reflect on: Family boundaries and emotional triggers How unresolved pain can show up in dreams and exhaustion Why sobriety doesn't erase fear — but changes how we face it The Big Book's description of fear, loneliness, and obsession The myth of the “pink cloud” and false confidence Courage born of humility, not bravado Letting go of fear instead of pretending it isn't there Why prayer is more than “whistling in the dark” — it requires action This is a real, unfiltered look at sobriety on life's terms — where recovery continues even on hard days, and where pain can still become a teacher instead of a trigger. Originally recorded on May 9th, 2021. Thanks for walking this road with me — no one trudges alone.

Most of us didn't get sober because life was going well. We got sober because alcohol stopped working and the cost became too high. But what keeps us sober isn't fear — it's discovering what sobriety actually gives us. Over time, sobriety stops feeling like a loss and starts revealing itself as a gift. The gift of sobriety isn't perfection, comfort, or a pain-free life. It's clarity. It's choice. It's the ability to show up, feel, respond, and grow. Sobriety gives us access to a life we couldn't reach when alcohol was in control. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why fear gets people sober but gifts keep them sober The difference between quitting and recovering What sobriety gives us that alcohol never could Emotional freedom and mental clarity Restored relationships and self-respect Spiritual growth and purpose Living instead of merely surviving Sobriety doesn't take life away — it gives life back. The gift isn't just not drinking. The gift is becoming available to life again.

Recovery isn't just about not drinking — it's about becoming useful again. For a long time, our lives revolved around chaos, self-centeredness, and survival. Alcohol promised relief but delivered isolation. What the program offers instead is something deeper and steadier: a sane and happy usefulness. Sanity doesn't mean life is perfect. Happiness doesn't mean we're always comfortable. Usefulness doesn't mean we're indispensable. It means we're grounded, present, and able to contribute without ego, expectation, or exhaustion. When recovery works, we stop living only for ourselves and start participating in life again. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What the Big Book means by “sane and happy usefulness” The shift from self-centered living to purposeful living Why usefulness is a byproduct of recovery, not a goal to chase How sanity returns through spiritual and practical action The difference between service and self-importance Why happiness grows when we stop trying to manufacture it Living usefully without burning out or controlling outcomes We don't recover to sit on the sidelines. We recover to rejoin life — sober, grounded, and available. Sanity gives us clarity. Happiness gives us peace. Usefulness gives our recovery direction.

In this episode of God Centered Recovery, Roger McDiarmid and Dion Miller take a hard look at Proverbs 8:11–14 and what it reveals about pride, desire, and decision-making in recovery. This passage reminds us that wisdom is more valuable than anything we want — and addiction thrives on choosing desire over wisdom. Together, Roger and Dion explore how prudence, humility, counsel, and sound judgment play a critical role in staying grounded and making healthier choices. In this conversation, we talk about: Why intelligence doesn't equal wisdom in recovery How pride and arrogance quietly set the stage for relapse The danger of urgency and emotional decision-making Why wisdom often shows up as a pause, not a feeling How seeking counsel protects sobriety and growth This episode is practical, honest, and grounded in real-life experience. It's not about being perfect — it's about learning to slow down, check our motives, and choose wisdom over impulse. Join us live as we continue breaking down Proverbs and applying them to everyday recovery.

It's easy to forget where we came from once life starts to stabilize. Time sober, routines in place, and a little distance from the chaos can quietly turn gratitude into judgment. That's why this reminder matters: but for the grace of God go I. Recovery isn't proof that we're better, smarter, or stronger than anyone else. It's evidence that grace intervened where self-will failed. The line between where we are and where we once were is thinner than we like to admit — and humility keeps us aware of that truth. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: How quickly gratitude can turn into judgment Remembering who we were before recovery Why grace—not effort alone—changed everything Staying humble as life improves Avoiding “terminal uniqueness” and superiority Seeing others with compassion instead of comparison Why humility protects sobriety Letting grace shape how we treat people Sobriety doesn't make us immune. Time doesn't make us different. Grace keeps us grounded. But for the grace of God go I — and that truth keeps recovery honest.

It's easy to forget where we came from once life starts to stabilize. Time sober, routines in place, and a little distance from the chaos can quietly turn gratitude into judgment. That's why this reminder matters: but for the grace of God go I. Recovery isn't proof that we're better, smarter, or stronger than anyone else. It's evidence that grace intervened where self-will failed. The line between where we are and where we once were is thinner than we like to admit — and humility keeps us aware of that truth. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: How quickly gratitude can turn into judgment Remembering who we were before recovery Why grace—not effort alone—changed everything Staying humble as life improves Avoiding “terminal uniqueness” and superiority Seeing others with compassion instead of comparison Why humility protects sobriety Letting grace shape how we treat people Sobriety doesn't make us immune. Time doesn't make us different. Grace keeps us grounded. But for the grace of God go I — and that truth keeps recovery honest.

For a long time, we thought alcohol was our biggest problem. But the truth runs deeper. Alcohol was the symptom — lack of humility was the handicap. Pride, self-reliance, and the need to be right kept us stuck long before the drink ever did. Humility isn't about thinking poorly of ourselves or shrinking down. It's about seeing ourselves honestly — without exaggeration, denial, or ego. Until humility shows up, recovery can't take root. We stay defensive, resistant, and disconnected from help, guidance, and God. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What the Big Book really means by “handicap” How pride disguises itself as confidence and independence Why self-reliance fails alcoholics every time The difference between humility and humiliation How humility opens the door to God and growth Why ego blocks teachability and connection What humility looks like in everyday recovery Recovery doesn't begin when we prove how strong we are. It begins when we admit we can't do it alone. Alcohol didn't defeat us — pride did. And humility is what finally levels the ground.

There's a lot of confusion in recovery around the Fourth Step. Some people treat it like something they're supposed to redo over and over, digging endlessly into the past. But that's not what the program teaches. We take one honest Fourth Step, and then we move forward into maintenance, not constant excavation. The Fourth Step is about clearing the wreckage — not living in it. Maintenance is where growth actually happens. It's where we apply what we learned, stay spiritually fit, and clean up new issues as they arise instead of reopening old ones. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What the Fourth Step is actually meant to do Why repeatedly redoing inventories can become unhealthy The difference between inventory and maintenance How Steps 10, 11, and 12 keep us spiritually fit Letting go of the need to keep reliving the past Why recovery is about progress, not self-punishment Moving forward without losing accountability We don't stay sober by constantly reopening old wounds. We stay sober by maintaining honesty, awareness, and spiritual condition today. One Fourth Step. Daily maintenance. That's how recovery stays livable.

Most of our pain doesn't come from what's happening — it comes from where our mind goes. Regret pulls us backward. Fear pushes us forward. And somewhere in between, we miss the only place life is actually happening, right now. Living in the now isn't about ignoring responsibility or pretending the past didn't happen. It's about releasing the constant mental tug-of-war between what was and what might be. Recovery teaches us that sobriety is lived one moment at a time, not all at once. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why the mind naturally drifts to the past and future How regret and fear steal peace The difference between awareness and avoidance Why living in the now supports emotional sobriety How God meets us in the present moment Letting go of mental replay and projection Practicing presence in everyday life You can't fix yesterday. You can't control tomorrow. But you can stay sober, grounded, and honest right now. And right now is enough.

I keep hearing people argue about whether recovery should be clinical or spiritual, and honestly, that argument misses the point. Alcoholism doesn't live in just one part of us. It messes with our thinking, our emotions, our behavior, and our spirit. So why would recovery only address one of those? Clinical tools help me understand my patterns, my trauma, and my reactions. Spiritual principles help me surrender what I can't control and stay grounded when life gets hard. I don't have to choose between the two — I need both. When recovery is only clinical, it turns into self-management. When it's only spiritual, it can turn into denial. The work happens in the overlap — where I take responsibility, ask for help, and rely on something bigger than me. Recovery isn't clinical or spiritual. It's both. And when we stop arguing about sides, people actually get better.”

Newcomers don't need to be fixed, managed, overwhelmed, or impressed. They need safety, honesty, and hope. How we work with newcomers matters — because the first experiences in recovery often shape whether someone stays or disappears back into the darkness. Working with newcomers isn't about control or authority. It's about remembering where we came from, meeting people where they are, and offering what was freely given to us. Recovery grows when it's shared simply, humbly, and without conditions. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why newcomers are the lifeblood of recovery What newcomers actually need (and what they don't) The danger of overwhelming people early on Leading by example instead of preaching Why patience matters more than knowledge How ego can quietly harm newcomers Offering guidance without control Keeping recovery simple, safe, and welcoming We don't save newcomers. We don't fix them. We walk with them — one step at a time. How we show up for newcomers may be the reason someone stays long enough to find hope.

Sometimes recovery doesn't fall apart because we need something new — it falls apart because we drifted away from what already works. Complication, overthinking, burnout, and ego creep in, and before we know it, we're no longer doing the simple things that kept us grounded in the first place. “How It Works” isn't outdated. It isn't basic in a dismissive way. It's foundational. When life gets loud, emotions run high, or sobriety feels shaky, the answer is rarely more information — it's returning to the fundamentals that saved our lives. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why recovery drifts over time How complexity sneaks in quietly What “back to basics” really means Why simple doesn't mean easy How ego complicates recovery The danger of thinking we've outgrown the basics Why the Steps still work when we actually work them How God meets us in simplicity We don't need a new solution. We need renewed commitment to the one that already works. Back to basics isn't going backward — it's getting re-centered.

The holidays have a way of blurring lines, reopening old wounds, and testing our recovery in ways that regular days don't. Family dynamics, expectations, guilt, obligation, and tradition can pull us right back into patterns we worked hard to outgrow. That's where boundaries stop being optional — they become essential. Boundaries aren't about punishment, control, or shutting people out. They're about protecting your sobriety, your peace, and the life God is helping you build. Especially during the holidaze, boundaries aren't selfish — they're responsible. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why the holidays are especially hard in recovery How family expectations can trigger old behaviors The difference between boundaries and resentment Why “just this once” is dangerous thinking How guilt disguises itself as obligation Setting limits without anger or explanation Choosing sobriety over tradition when necessary Letting go of the need to fix, save, or please You don't have to attend every gathering. You don't have to explain your recovery. You don't have to sacrifice your peace to keep others comfortable. Boundaries aren't walls — they're guardrails. And during the holidaze, they may be the very thing that keeps you sober.

Humility isn't thinking less of yourself — it's thinking about yourself less. In recovery, humility becomes the foundation that keeps everything else standing. Without it, growth turns into ego, learning turns into arrogance, and service turns into self-promotion. Humility keeps us teachable, grounded, and honest. This isn't about self-shaming or playing small. It's about knowing where our strength actually comes from. Addiction taught many of us to either inflate ourselves or disappear completely. Recovery teaches us balance — confidence without ego, conviction without control. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What humility really is (and what it isn't) Why humility is essential to long-term recovery The difference between confidence and ego How humility keeps us teachable Why God works through humility, not self-will How pride quietly blocks growth What humility looks like in everyday life Humility isn't weakness. It's strength under control. And it's one of the clearest signs that real recovery is taking root.

One of the quiet miracles of recovery is realizing how many things we no longer have to do. We don't have to lie. We don't have to run. We don't have to manipulate, numb, hide, explode, or pretend. Addiction told us everything was a requirement for survival. Recovery shows us most of it was fear. The “I don't have to's” are about freedom — real freedom. Not the kind that comes from doing whatever you want, but the kind that comes from no longer being owned by old behaviors, old reactions, and old beliefs. Emotional sobriety grows when we recognize choice again. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: How addiction turns fear into obligation The difference between responsibility and compulsion What we no longer have to do to stay sober How surrender creates options instead of rules Why freedom feels uncomfortable at first The role God plays in restoring choice How “I don't have to” becomes a daily practice You don't have to prove anything. You don't have to control everything. You don't have to react the way you used to. And realizing that might be one of the most freeing moments in recovery.

At some point in recovery, many of us start asking a question we never thought we'd ask before: Is this God calling me… or am I just out of my mind? When the noise quiets down and the chaos settles, something new shows up — intuition, conviction, purpose, direction. And that can feel unsettling when you spent years not trusting your own thoughts. This isn't about hearing voices or chasing signs everywhere. It's about learning the difference between ego, fear, impulse, and spiritual guidance. Recovery doesn't just sober us up — it wakes us up. And waking up can feel uncomfortable before it feels clear. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why spiritual awareness can feel confusing at first The difference between God's guidance and self-will How fear disguises itself as “logic” Why God's calling often feels uncomfortable, not flashy How recovery sharpens discernment over time Why humility keeps us grounded How to pause, pray, and test direction instead of reacting God's voice is usually calm, steady, and persistent — not rushed, loud, or ego-driven. And no, you're probably not nuts. You're just learning to listen differently.

There are moments in recovery when quitting feels easier than continuing. When progress feels slow, when mistakes pile up, when life doesn't let up, and the old voice starts whispering that none of this is worth it. That voice lies. Recovery isn't built on perfection — it's built on persistence. “Never, ever give up” doesn't mean you never fall. It means you don't stay down. It means you keep showing up, even tired, even discouraged, even unsure. It means you trust that God is still working when you can't see results yet. Growth happens because we stay — not because we get it right every time. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why giving up is often emotional, not logical How setbacks don't cancel progress The difference between failure and quitting Why God works through endurance, not shortcuts What staying sober really looks like on hard days How persistence builds real spiritual strength Why continuing matters more than feeling confident Never, ever give up doesn't mean force or pressure. It means commitment. It means willingness. It means trusting that tomorrow can look different if you stay. You don't have to win today. You just have to stay.

“Happy, joyous, and free” isn't a mood. It's not a nonstop emotional high. It's not pretending life is perfect or that pain disappears in recovery. It's a spiritual condition — one that grows when we stop fighting life, stop running from ourselves, and stop trying to control outcomes. For many of us, happiness was something we chased. Joy was something we tried to manufacture. Freedom felt impossible. Recovery teaches us that these things aren't achieved by force — they're experienced as a byproduct of honesty, surrender, and living in alignment with God's will instead of our own. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What “happy, joyous, and free” really means (and what it doesn't) Why chasing happiness keeps us restless How joy grows out of acceptance and gratitude What real freedom looks like in sobriety Why peace matters more than pleasure How living spiritually grounded changes how we experience life Why happiness shows up when we stop demanding it Happy, joyous, and free doesn't mean life stops being hard. It means you stop being at war with it. And that's real freedom

Thinking of others doesn't come naturally to most of us — especially in early recovery. Addiction trains us to live inward, to focus on our needs, our pain, our fear, our cravings, our story. That mindset keeps us stuck. Recovery begins to change when we start looking outward. Thinking of others isn't about neglecting yourself or becoming a doormat. It's about stepping out of self-centered fear and into usefulness. It's one of the fastest ways to break obsession, quiet the mind, and reconnect with God. When we stop asking “What do I need right now?” and start asking “Who can I help?”, something shifts. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why self-centered thinking fuels emotional relapse How thinking of others restores balance and perspective The spiritual principle behind service Why helping someone else helps us more than them sometimes The difference between service and people-pleasing How God uses small acts of kindness to keep us sober Practical ways to think of others without losing yourself Thinking of others doesn't mean forgetting yourself. It means remembering you're part of something bigger. And that's where freedom lives.

We all came in thinking our problems were unique — different stories, different damage, different pain. But recovery has a way of stripping that illusion away. Different paths brought us here, but the solution is surprisingly common. A common solution doesn't mean a cheap or easy one. It means shared principles: honesty, surrender, accountability, humility, service, and reliance on God rather than self-will. The details of our stories may differ, but the work that saves us looks remarkably similar. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why focusing on differences keeps us stuck How ego convinces us our situation is “special” What makes the solution common — not generic Why God works through simple, shared principles How unity strengthens recovery What happens when we stop arguing about the method and start living the message Why the solution works across backgrounds, beliefs, and brokenness A common solution doesn't erase individuality — it grounds us in truth. We don't recover because we're special. We recover because we're willing.

Most of us come into recovery convinced that our alcoholism is a curse — the thing that ruined our lives, destroyed relationships, shattered opportunities, and dragged us to our knees. And yes, it did all of that. But what if that wasn't the whole truth? What if the very thing that nearly killed you is also the thing God is using to save you — and others? This isn't about romanticizing alcoholism. It's about recognizing what happens after the wreckage: the awakening, the humility, the purpose, the clarity, the relationship with God that most people never experience until everything else is stripped away. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why alcoholism feels like a curse — and why that's not the end of the story How brokenness becomes the doorway to spiritual calling Why God uses the “messy ones” to carry powerful messages How surviving addiction gives you empathy, insight, and purpose Turning pain into usefulness — the cornerstone of recovery How your story might be the exact tool God needs to reach someone else Why calling isn't about perfection — it's about willingness Your alcoholism nearly destroyed you, but it also woke you up. It forced surrender. It exposed truth. It pushed you toward God in a way comfort never could.

Accountability is the moment recovery stops being theory and becomes real life. It's the grown-up side of sobriety — the part where we stop blaming, stop hiding, stop sugarcoating, and start taking responsibility for our actions, our reactions, and our impact. Most of us spent years living in denial, excuses, and “Yeah, but…” thinking. Accountability is the shift where we finally look in the mirror without running. It's not about shame. It's not about punishment. It's about maturity, honesty, and growing into the person sobriety is trying to turn us into. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: Why accountability is the turning point in recovery How accountability builds emotional sobriety The difference between guilt and responsibility Why self-honesty is the first requirement How accountability strengthens relationships Why God expects honesty, not perfection Practical ways to practice accountability every day Accountability isn't about being hard on yourself — it's about refusing to live small, scared, and dishonest. It's where real change begins.

Radical acceptance isn't about liking what's happening. It's about finally dropping the fight with reality. Most of us spent years arguing with life, resisting the truth, and trying to force things to be the way we wanted. That battle nearly killed us. Radical acceptance is the opposite — it's the doorway into emotional sobriety. Acceptance doesn't mean approval. It doesn't mean surrendering your dignity. It doesn't mean you stop trying. It means you stop bleeding energy into things you can't change, and you start putting that energy into what you can. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What radical acceptance is — and what it isn't How acceptance removes suffering, not pain How fighting reality keeps us spiritually sick Why acceptance is the first step toward internal freedom How God fits into letting go Practical tools to accept life on life's terms How acceptance is the foundation of emotional sobriety You don't have to like it. You just have to stop fighting it. That's where peace begins.

Living in the solution doesn't mean life gets easy. It means you stop pouring gasoline on your own fires. It means you stop rehearsing the problem and start walking toward the answer. Most of us spent years living in the problem — blaming, reacting, hiding, drinking, isolating, controlling, running. Living in the solution is the opposite of all that. Living in the solution is a shift — a spiritual one, an emotional one, and a practical one. It's where growth actually happens. It's where we learn to trust God, trust the process, and trust the tools that saved our life. It's where we take responsibility for our part while letting go of the part that isn't ours to carry. In today's Daily Trudge, we talk about: What “living in the problem” really looks like How fear, ego, and self-will keep us stuck What shifts when you move into the solution How the Steps teach solution-based living Why willingness is more powerful than perfection How God fits into solution, not chaos Practical ways to return to the solution when your mind drifts back to the mess Living in the solution isn't about pretending everything is fine. It's about choosing actions, principles, and perspectives that keep you sober, grounded, and connected — even when life shows up messy.

Loyalty is one of the most misunderstood principles in recovery. A lot of us came in with backwards loyalty — loyal to the wrong people, the wrong habits, the wrong beliefs, even the wrong version of ourselves. We confused loyalty with attachment, with people-pleasing, or with tolerating behavior that was destroying us. Real loyalty looks different. Real loyalty is alignment — with truth, with growth, with responsibility, and with the person you're trying to become. Recovery asks us to reshape where our loyalty goes: not to the chaos we came from, but to the integrity we're building now. In today's Daily Trudge, we break down: What loyalty actually means in recovery The difference between loyalty and enabling Why loyalty to unhealthy people keeps us sick How to stay loyal to your principles instead of your pain Loyalty to self: the part most people skip Why emotional sobriety requires loyalty to truth over comfort How loyalty grows connection, trust, and humility Loyalty isn't about sticking around no matter what. It's about showing up honestly, consistently, and responsibly — for your recovery, for your people, and for the life you're building.

“When Wisdom Calls and Trouble Whispers” Today is our very first episode of God Centered Recovery, hosted by Roger McDiarmid and Dion Miller. We're kicking things off with Proverbs 1 — a chapter that captures a truth every person in recovery can relate to: wisdom calls out loudly, but trouble whispers quietly… and that whisper often sounds way too familiar. In this episode, Roger brings insight into the themes of Proverbs 1 while Dion connects those ideas to real-life recovery. Together, we talk about: Why wisdom is often the last voice we listen to How destructive invitations show up in early and long-term recovery The people and patterns that pull us backward The consequences of ignoring what we already know And how to start responding to wisdom before life forces the issue This episode is honest, practical, and relatable. Two different perspectives — one focused on wisdom, one focused on lived experience — coming together for a conversation that encourages growth, awareness, and better choices. Thanks for joining us for our very first episode. Let's get started.

We judge ourselves by our intentions, but the world experiences us through our actions. And recovery sits right in the middle of that tension. Intentions matter — they show where our heart is pointed. But intentions without accountability? That's how we stay sick. That's how we repeat the same behaviors, hurt the same people, and convince ourselves we're “trying” when nothing actually changes. Accountability is where growth happens. It's where honesty replaces excuses. It's where we stop explaining and start doing. It's where character is built, not talked about. It's the bridge between who we want to be and who we actually show up as. In today's Daily Trudge, we're talking about: Why good intentions aren't enough How accountability transforms recovery The difference between guilt and responsibility Why intentions without follow-through cause resentment Why people trust actions, not promises How to build accountability without shame How intentions + action create integrity Intentions show your direction. Accountability gets you there. That's how we grow, that's how we repair, and that's how we stay sober.

People think healing makes you softer, gentler, more agreeable. But the truth? The healed version of you will look “meaner” — not because you turned into a jerk, but because you finally stopped letting people walk all over you. Healing doesn't turn you into a saint. It turns you into someone who values their own peace. Someone who doesn't apologize for boundaries. Someone who doesn't shrink to keep other people comfortable. Someone who says “no,” means it, and sleeps fine afterward. In today's Daily Trudge, we're breaking down: Why healing makes you look “mean” to the wrong people Why people-pleasing was your old survival skill How boundaries get misread as attitude Why self-respect will offend the unhealed How recovery hardens your backbone without hardening your heart Why the healed version of you is actually kinder — just not to everyone Here's the truth: You're not getting meaner. You're getting clearer. Stronger. Healthier. More honest. And the people who relied on the “old you” — passive, scared, guilty, compliant — will absolutely have a problem with it. But that's not your problem anymore.

We don't get sober just to stop drinking — we get sober because something inside us wakes up. A deep desire to live usefully. A desire to stop hiding, stop destroying, and start showing up for life in a way that actually matters. Living usefully isn't about being perfect. It isn't about saving the world. It's about being honest, present, dependable, and willing. It's about taking everything we've been through — even the darkest parts — and letting it serve someone else who's still struggling. In today's Daily Trudge we talk about: What it really means to live usefully Why purpose becomes a powerful force in recovery How shame and fear get in the way How to stop thinking usefulness means overworking or overgiving Simple, real tools for showing up in your life How being useful heals the parts of us addiction tore apart Recovery isn't just about removing alcohol — it's about adding meaning. And the truth is, most of us are a lot more useful than we think. Sometimes it's a word, a presence, a story, or just showing up when you used to run. Usefulness is not about perfection. It's about willingness.

We're not here to be perfect — we're here to grow. And sometimes growth comes dressed up as a slip, a setback, or a moment where our flaws get loud. That doesn't make you a failure. It makes you human. Today we're talking about what it really means to look beyond the flaws — ours and other people's — and why a slip can actually be progress when it wakes us up, humbles us, or gets us honest again. In this Daily Trudge, we dig into: Why flaws aren't defects — they're information How a slip can be feedback, not failure How shame blocks growth, but grace builds it How to stop judging yourself harder than the world ever could How to see the person, not the mistake Why perfectionism has no place in recovery The real meaning of “progress, not perfection” This isn't about excusing behavior — it's about understanding it so we can move forward instead of staying stuck. Recovery isn't a straight line. It's forward, backward, sideways, through the mud, and somehow still growing. If you slipped recently, listen: you don't have to start over. You just have to start again.

Living sober is one thing. Living emotionally sober is where the real work starts. Most of us didn't drink because life was hard — we drank because feelings were hard. Emotional sobriety is the ability to sit in life without letting our reactions run the show. In today's Daily Trudge, we're breaking down what emotional sobriety actually means, why it's harder than putting the drink down, and the simple tools that make the biggest impact. No fluff. No sugarcoating. Just real recovery. What you'll walk away with: How to respond instead of react How to stop letting feelings become facts How to avoid emotional hangovers Tools that keep your head and your heart steady Why emotional sobriety is the key to long-term recovery I speak plainly, and I don't co-sign BS. We talk truth so it stops running our lives — and we trudge through this stuff together.

In recovery, we feel deeply — fear, shame, joy, insecurity, hope. But here's where a lot of us get tangled up: We start treating feelings like facts. “If I feel unworthy, I am unworthy.” “If I feel abandoned, they must be abandoning me.” “If I feel anger, someone else must have caused it.” But feelings aren't facts — they're signals. They're valid, they matter, and they point to something inside us… …but they do not automatically represent truth. Today we'll talk about how to honor our emotions without letting them run the show, and how emotional sobriety means learning to pause, check our narrative, and choose our response instead of reacting to every feeling like it's the gospel truth.

“Repairing the Damage” is more than making amends — it's about becoming the kind of person who doesn't keep creating new wreckage. In recovery, we look back and see the emotional, spiritual, and relational destruction our drinking caused. It's overwhelming if we stare at it all at once. But the program teaches us a different way: One conversation at a time. One behavior change at a time. One willingness moment at a time. Today we'll talk about how repairing damage isn't about perfection or groveling — it's about responsibility, humility, and showing up differently. The people around us don't need promises… they need consistency. And we can give them that now.

In recovery, we don't always need fancy words or deep philosophy — sometimes the truth just needs to be spoken plainly. Today we're breaking down recovery without the fluff, without the buzzwords, and without pretending everything is fine when it isn't. We'll talk about what's really going on under the surface:

“Practice these principles in all our affairs” — the line every alcoholic skips over until life smacks us in the face. This isn't about being perfect. It's about consistency. Anyone can be spiritual in a meeting. Anyone can be humble when life is going their way. But real recovery shows up at work, in traffic, in relationships, in conflict, in fear… In all our affairs means: • When we feel attacked • When we feel tired • When we don't want to be patient • When our ego is loud • When our character defects want the wheel It's taking spiritual actions even when we don't feel spiritual. Today we're talking about the REAL meaning of Step Twelve — living this program everywhere, not just where it's easy.

Not everyone we meet in recovery plays the same role — and knowing the difference can save your sobriety. Today we're breaking down three of the most misunderstood relationships in recovery: the Sponsor, the Temporary Sponsor, and the Closed-Mouthed Friend. A Sponsor walks you through the Steps, tells you the truth even when you don't want to hear it, and helps you build a spiritual foundation that won't collapse when life hits. A Temporary Sponsor is the person who keeps you from drifting until you find the right long-term fit… someone to get you started, not someone to keep you stuck. And a Closed-Mouthed Friend? That's the person you can trust with anything — no judgment, no gossip, no games — just honesty, confidentiality, and compassion. These three roles are different, but each one is vital to staying sober, staying connected, and staying honest. Let's talk about how to find them, how to use them, and how to BE them for someone else.

Emotional sobriety doesn't come free — it costs comfort, ego, self-pity, and the illusion that we can control everything. The moment we stop drinking, we start facing the real work: feeling feelings, taking responsibility, letting go, and learning how to respond instead of react. Emotional sobriety is the point where recovery stops being about not drinking and starts being about living differently. Today we talk about what it costs, why it's worth it, and how it becomes the foundation for long-term serenity.

Betrayal hits differently for alcoholics. It doesn't just hurt — it reopens every old wound, every fear, every lie we told ourselves, and every lie that was told to us. But recovery gives us something we never had before: a path from betrayal to real closure. Closure isn't about forgetting, pretending, or minimizing what happened. It's about reclaiming our peace, releasing the poison, and removing the power that betrayal has had over our lives. Today we dig into how we move from being wounded to being free — through honesty, boundaries, forgiveness (when we're ready), and spiritual growth.

A little update on Trudging Together

In AA we hear it all the time — “the Steps are suggested.” But suggested like a friendly menu option… or suggested like gravity? The truth is, the Steps are “suggested” the same way opening a parachute when you jump out of a plane is “suggested.” Nobody is forcing you — but the results speak for themselves. Today we're talking about what “suggested” really means, why the Steps aren't optional if you want long-term freedom, and how picking and choosing only the comfortable parts keeps us spiritually sick.

Quitting drinking is only the beginning. What we choose not to do after we put the bottle down is just as important as what we choose to do. In this Daily Trudge, we're covering the most common traps that take recovering alcoholics off the beam — resentment, isolation, self-pity, drifting from the basics, and thinking we're “good now.” Staying sober means avoiding the behaviors that pull us back into fear, ego, and self-destruction. Today we talk about the things we don't do if we want long-term sobriety: • Don't isolate • Don't stop doing the simple things • Don't rely on self-will • Don't run from feelings • Don't forget quitting drinking is only Step One Recovery thrives when we avoid the pitfalls that once destroyed us.

“Let Go and Let God” gets misunderstood all the time. Some people think it means giving up, backing out, shutting down, or sitting on their hands waiting for a miracle. But that's not recovery — and that's not God. Letting go is not defeat. Letting go is not apathy. Letting go is release — release of the illusion that we control everything. Today we're talking about the REAL meaning of “Let Go and Let God”: Surrendering control, not responsibility • Taking action while releasing the outcome • Trusting God's direction instead of forcing our own • Why apathy is self-will in disguise • How letting go increases peace, not passivity Letting go is an act of courage. Letting God is an act of faith. When we combine both, we stop fighting life and start living it.

Codependency is when our emotional well-being depends on someone else's behavior, reactions, approval, or chaos. It's the habit of trying to fix, manage, or control other people while ignoring our own needs. In recovery, codependency is just as destructive as the addiction itself — because it keeps us living through others instead of living our own lives. Today we're talking about how codependency forms, how it affects relationships, and how we break free by setting boundaries, building self-worth, and letting people carry their own weight.

Serving our brother means showing up for others the way someone once showed up for us. In recovery, service isn't charity — it's survival. When we focus on helping another alcoholic, our ego quiets down, our purpose becomes clear, and God works through us in ways we could never manage on our own. Today we talk about what real service looks like, why it's not always convenient or comfortable, and why helping our brother is one of the most powerful spiritual actions we can take.

One of the most misunderstood principles in recovery is “Attraction, not promotion.” It's not about selling recovery. It's not about convincing anyone. And it's definitely not about flashy promises or ego-driven outreach. Attraction is about how we live, not what we say. It's the calm in our voice, the consistency in our actions, the peace in our spirit, and the authenticity in our walk that makes others lean in and ask, “What changed?” Today we're breaking down what attraction really means, why promotion fails us, and how living the program becomes the loudest message we could ever carry.

Gratitude isn't just saying “thank you.” In recovery, gratitude is a spiritual position — a way of seeing the world that keeps us sober, sane, and connected to God. It shifts our focus from what's missing to what's been given… from what we've lost to what we've gained… from self-pity to purpose. When we practice gratitude, our minds calm down, our hearts open up, and our perspective changes. It is one of the fastest ways to get out of self and reconnect with the truth: We are living a life we once prayed for. Today we're talking about what gratitude really is, why it's essential to spiritual growth, and how it keeps us grounded in recovery — even when life isn't going the way we want it to.

Recovery introduces us to a new reality — one we never expected, rarely feel ready for, and often resist at first. The old way of living was chaotic but familiar. The new way? Honest, spiritual, connected, and grounded. This shift isn't about pretending everything is great; it's about seeing life through new eyes. Pain hits different. Joy hits different. Responsibility hits different. And with that comes a new freedom, one built on truth instead of denial. Today we talk about stepping into that new reality — the one God, recovery, and the Steps keep pointing us toward — and what it means to leave the old one behind for good.

“Do I really have to forgive?” Most of us ask this at some point — usually when someone has hurt us so deeply that forgiveness feels impossible, unfair, or like we're letting them off the hook. But in recovery, forgiveness isn't about excusing the harm. It's about freeing ourselves from the poison we've been carrying. Resentment chains us to the past. Trauma keeps us frozen. Anger wears us out. Forgiveness is how we break free — not how they get away with anything. Today we explore: • Why forgiveness is a tool for us, not them • The difference between forgiveness and reconciliation • Why spiritual progress demands we let go • How resentment destroys peace • What God can do with wounds we cannot heal alone Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting or trusting again. It means refusing to live in the shadow of someone else's harm.

In recovery, we don't heal alone — we heal together. Finding your tribe means finding the people who walk beside you, challenge you, call you on your BS, celebrate your wins, and remind you who you truly are. Your tribe isn't always your family. It's not always your old friends. It's the people who share your experience, speak your language, and help you grow — spiritually, emotionally, and honestly. Today we talk about how to recognize the people who belong on your journey… and how to gently release the ones who don't. No one trudges alone.

In recovery, not every emotional reaction is a resentment — and not every painful memory is “just trauma.” But we mix the two up all the time. A resentment is usually about anger, ego, expectations, and old wounds we keep feeding. Trauma is about deep emotional injury that shaped our nervous system, beliefs, and reactions. One needs inventory. The other needs healing. Today we talk about how to tell the difference, how each one affects our recovery, and why mislabeling trauma as a resentment can actually do more harm than good. We'll dig into: • What resentment really is in AA terms • What trauma looks like in the body and mind • When inventory helps — and when it doesn't • How trauma-informed recovery keeps us safe • Why both require honesty, humility, and God Not everything that hurts is a resentment. Not everything that angers us is trauma. This is about clarity — and freedom.