Shut Up Cincinnati

Hello peckerheads!  There's a heatwave in Cincinnati and there's no air condition in the studio but the fellas risked their lives to record another masterpiece of artistic nothingness.  Would you buy redbull for your kids?  How big of a loser is the dork that got mad when Jamarr Chase wouldn't sign an autograph for him?  We enjoyed the NBA finals but did anyone else?  Would you bang a dying man's wife by his request but with the knowledge that it's going to make the nearly dead fella super sad?   Are the Reds about to have the best starting 5 in baseball in the next year?  Do you like a president that says the f word?  Who is leaving ducks for Chris?  Does Obama have aids?  Well, we didn't talk about the last one but join us for the rest of it!

Hello tubby turds!  Join the guys this week for the most important podcast since the last podcast that they did.  Chris tells us why he hates California this week while Jason defends Pablo at Home Depot but both agree that if you're waiving a Mexican flag above burning cars then you should get you deported.   Should the Bengals have waived Germaine Pratt?  Why did Chris leave a "date" right after getting squirted on?  Jason watches a tweaker attack a couple of hippies at a park by UC.  Chris gets yelled at by a girl with special needs, meanwhile Jason is a hero for supporting them.  Elon and Trump don't like each other, Kash Patel stays in his lane instead of doing his job, andTrey Hendrickson isn't voluntarily working out for the Bengals.  The guys get to the bottom of all of this and end world hunger in the process.  There is nothing these losers can't figure out.  Join!

Hello python peckers!  It's that time of the whatever and the fellas are here to deliver another marvelous masterpiece of a podcast that will save humanity.  Did Jason steal 71 billions dollars?  How did a drive by cuck fall in love with someone as old and ugly as Chris?  Will shooting people start improving fast food quality?  Who is the Punisher and why was Diddy so gross?  Did you know the leader of a monkey torture ring was from Cincinnati?  How do you kill your raccoons?  We get to the bottom of all that non-sense and probably talk about poop too much.  Join us or I'll steal your catalytic converter and not even buy meth......what a waste!

Welcome fart connoisseurs!  The team is united once again as it turns out that Chris really didn't die.  Jason wanted a black pope.  Chris turns down taking a dude's wife out for a weekend of romance.  When did Justin Jefferson start dressing like a Persian prince?  Is Chris not manly because he wouldn't go on a 4 hour round trip to bang some dude's ugly wife?  Are the Bengals messing up the offseason once again with the Tre Hendrickson drama?  Would you rather a girl have one boob or 3 boobs?  Chris is mad at Take 5 oil change for not filling his transmission fluid.  Jason gets tricked by a special needs AI creation.  You better listen or I'll force you to eat gum off the bottom of a cafeteria table.    

Hello turd warriors!  Chris was murdered by an angry cuck so Ryan Acres joins the show as a temporary replacement.  We talk about the possibility of actually pulling off a ZZ Bottom.  Ryan also tells us about 2 new sex positions called the Kings Crown and Davey's Havoc.   We know Chris was old enough to own slaves but did he only owned a few just so other white's wouldn't make fun of him?  Did Chris invent butt eating back in the 1800s?   Will immigrants take the 1000 dollars Trump is offering to go back home?  Is it gay to prefer male porn stars that are attractive?  We were all over the place so just listen and find out or I'll make fun of your wonky eye.  

Howdy Doody Peckerheads!  Join the fellas for another outstanding episode of the number one podcast that's recorded on Jason's street.  Maybe.  I'm not quite sure.  Didn't ask around.  Anyhow....This week we find out what dogs are really doing when they scratch their butts on the floor.  Jason and Chris both choose themselves for a$$hole of the week.  Should anyone buying more than 4 items at a gas station be given the death penalty?  Has RFK's brain worms finally won the battle?  Did the Bengals mess up another draft?  Should Shedeur Sanders been drafted earlier or did his ego hurt him?  Will Hairy Guy get forced to lick a butthole?  Jason tells us how good it feels to go MAGA for 15 minutes at a time.  Chris turns down a cuck after seeing the hotwife was not so hot.  Join us and find out more crap you didn't really want to know!  

Hey there jolly peckerheads!  Jason has been doing charity work for rich people in Honduras but now we're back and ready to solve all the world's issues.  Did JD kill the Pope?  Would you rather hang out with a guy that bangs dogs, a guy who bangs chickens till their dead, or a guy who puts declawed gerbils up their butts?  Would you rather the string around the gerbil be on it's tail or wrapped around its hind legs?  We're worried about safety here at Shut Up Cincinnati.  Did Haley Joel Osment go full Mel Gibson?  Does Chris prefer being the bull for a hotwife or a cuck situation?  Is the police chief that poops on the floor a hero or an a$$hole?  All these questions are answered and Chris pulls out a really gross nose hair about 10 minutes in.  Join us or we tell your friends that you're balding.  

Welcome to the 2025 Celebrity Death Pool episode!  Which celebrity will kick the bucket this year and how many points will it give some peckerhead in their death pool?  Which professional wrestler's heart will explode from the gallons of steroids and booze over the years?  Will someone take out a politician and cause a civil war this year?  Why would anyone pick Dick Van Dyke and get 1 point?  Does aids even kill people anymore?  Who is going to beat Joy Behar to death?  Will a rapper get shot?  Will Diddy off himself?  Can we pick celebrity dogs?  Will Casey Anthony just die already?  Come get dark with us!  

Hello peckerheads!  It's been a long couple of weeks but the guys are back to tell you it's your fault that they haven't recorded but would still like you to join them for another brilliant conversation between buffoons.  Chris makes a porn unbeknownst to him and now feels like the victim of sexual assault.  Jason appreciates the cool guy driving through the nazi rally.  Speaking of which, can you still be a scary nazi if you need a comfort dog?  Has Chris banged woman of special needs?  Did Jason start a Dominican war in the barber shop?  Why is Ohio making a bad marijuana policy even worse?  Does Ariana Grande have all the aids?  We get to the bottom of everything important and answer all of the world's mysteries.  Join us or we will leave a dead squirrel in your mailbox.  

What it be, peckerheads!  The guys are back for a discussion that may change the world or at least waste an hour of your time.  Who is going to be the first person to try out the Log Flume in Gaza?  Is anyone outside of Kansas City rooting for the Chiefs?  Would you be willing to hang out in a doctors office with a hard on for 2 hours just to get the perfect boner pill?  Jayden Smith is a weirdo.  Movie theaters hate letting you keep your money.  Is it racist to assume the purpose of a memorial based on the neighborhood you see it in?  Is Beyonce the greatest country singer of all time?  We let you know all the answers and make up the answers we don't know!  Join in!

Good afternoon peckerheads!  The guys are back and it hasn't been 2 weeks!  Is Elon Musk the biggest douche in the country?  Did he actually invent anything?  Why did the old president and the new president pardon people that should stay in prison and why do they both suck?  Chris tells us about a time that he went pig hunting.  Jason may or may not have left a cripple without a ride.  Chris falls on ice and a woman laughs at him.  Jason tells us about an old neighbor that would keep slow orphan kids in their basement for money.  The guys give more bad football predictions that can help you lose money.  Come one, come all, join the fun!

Hello turd nuggets!  The fat bastard and old dipshit are back to warm your hearts and minds with a great conversation about nothing important.  Chris is angry at the homeless after they turned down his old coat with a broken zipper.  Jason becomes an expert on the history of DMX.  Chris finds out if there is such a thing as a bad bj.  Jason lashes out at strangers over things normal people would just move on from.  Is it alright to smack your kid for wanting a pineapple?  What former player would you want to coach your favorite team?  The guys argue over Zac Taylor and give their picks against the spread for this weekends games.   Listen or die or whatever Diddy said.  

Happy 2025 Dorks!  We welcome in the New Year by having a great conversation that accomplishes nothing and yet saves the world at the same time.  Why are ladies calling Chris "Daddy Long Crack" on the streets?  Who won 2024's Celebrity Death Pool?  Are foreigners smarter than Americans or are corporations just greedy bastards?  Jason has a dream that he was being attacked Kendrick Lamar's non existing gang and was afraid when only the gays showed up to help him.  Chris tells us he isn't going to brag about winning the fantasy football belt but then brags and talks smack the rest of the show for everyone underestimating him.  Is Taylor really dating Dennis Rodman and actually working for North Korea?  Is THE MAN putting up more traffic signs in the hood just to harass people?  We get down to the bottom of all these questions like your fat uncle tries to get to the bottom of his belly button after Christmas dinner.  Join in!

What it be, Mussolini!  Join the fellas for a jam packed conversation about stuff!  You know you love stuff!  Jason throws his support behind a murderer.  Chris is angry about the cost of wank off toys.  Creepy Kev is getting a law in his honor.  In a shocking turn of events, it turns out that methheads burnt the bridge and not the homeless.  Luigi wasn't the only hot hit person arrested recently.  Also, does Joe Burrow like boobs?  Did Jason transport crack-cocaine across state lines?  Can Asian's get sunburnt?  Would the healthcare industry change if there was an outbreak of assassinations to CEO's?  Is butt play gay if you're alone?  We answer all these questions and look damn good in the process.   Listen or I'll give your nephew a wicked Indian burn.  

Hello Goose Peckers!  The fellas find time to get together and record another episode of life saving advice and pure garbage.  Chris finds out that Conor Mcgregor is a sexual predator.  Uber gave Jason and every other driver another unannounced pay cut.  Chris finds a new partner but she isn't into his normal butt play.  The guys find themselves driving around Cincinnati and eyeing down the homeless to figure out who the dirty bridge burner was.   Why don't they sell diet soda in the hood?   Who will win the Superbowl?  Why do people care when a flag is planted on a football field?  If you get bit by a bum do you turn into one like a vampire or zombie?  We get to the bottom of everything and if you don't listen you'll probably get molested by a warthog on Christmas Day.  

Hey there pink eye enthusiasts!  The old man and the fat man are back for another blabber fest that eventually solves all the world's problems.  Jason offers to help Donald Trump by developing a new border policy where everyone wins....well almost everyone.   Chris almost dies but just pees his pants instead.  Jason is looking to gather a posse and seek justice on whoever started the fire that ruined an important bridge.  We discuss why Dayton, Ohio is a pile of crap.  Jason gets made fun of by a bartender.  Both guys have a hero of the week, one which is making the world a better place with spray paint and the other with cocaine.  We talk about some other stuff too but I kind of have to doo doo so enjoy your day!  Listen or I'll teach your little sister how to dance!

Well its been a week!  Join the guys as the figure out where we go from here.  Should the Bengals fire Zac Taylor?  Is it mom's fault that women can't win the presidency?  Should all the Theys and Gays join together and storm the capital?  Why did the Dems lose everything?  Do people actually believe Trump is going to fix the economy?  Will Chris the Bull take out his newest prospective hot wife on an actual date?  Lets unite together under the Shut Up Cincinnati banner and figure this mess out!  My wife told me that she heard everything while we were recording and it was the most offensive podcast she's heard out of us yet.  Find out if she's right.   

Hey pencil pecker!  The fellas somehow managed to record two weeks in a row so listen to the stupid crap they have to say.  Bronny James makes his NBA debut and old white dudes everywhere are upset about it.  Chris gives us a review of Blue Chews.  Jason sees a dead body.  The guys pick their NBA team for the year and predict the Bengals/Eagles game.  The guys also discuss a couple of local homeless people, wonder what it would be like to look identical to Hitler, and Jason hates on the cops again.  Listen or I'll make you eat a vial of skin tags!

Hey there jolly nips!  Join us for the most reliably unreliable podcast in southern Ohio.  Chris has a new cuck opportunity but is scared the girl just won't be impressed with him after banging half the state.  Jason still can't fathom how parents lead their children to Catholicism after their sordid past.  The guys flip flop on who they think will win the election but we do know that Moreno fellow sure does hate the trans.  Jason drove around a real life troll that lived under a bridge.  The guys argue over the Menendez brothers fate but agree that the Kardashians don't really care.  Join us!  Just two handsome fellas talking about stuff and things.  Try not to get a boner! 

Welcome fellow humans!  Join us for another chat about nothing and everything all at once.  Local legend, Pete Rose, died and we discuss the different opinions you're hearing from around the city.  Why did P. Diddy need all that baby oil?  When did J.D. Vance become so damn handsome?  Did Biggie Smalls take it in the can?  Chris finds a new cuck couple and Jason is disappointed that they are "normal."  Chris swears off love in exchange for freedom.  Jason tells an old woman off in the back of his car.  We talk about other things but I'm stoned and it's early and I can't remember shit.  Just listen and leave me alone.  

Hello pumpkin butt!  Join the fellas as they solve all the world's issue.  Are the Haitians eating the cats?  Why would anyone have 50 cats to begin with?  Jason explains why seeing someone eat a goose at a park is a day enhancer.  Chris gets a complaint on his favorite swinger site. Who was at fault in the Tyreek Hill situation?  Is Shannon Sharpe trying to convince people he likes women?  Is the Bengals season is completely over after week 1?  We get to the bottom of every important topic and find reasonable ways to cure the world of all that ills it.  Join in!

Hello perky patties!  Come join us for another glorious discussion about nothing and everything at the same time.  Chris the bull has been grazing pastures looking for a new hot wife only to once again run into discolored genitalia.  Jason is still an unemployed loser that spends hours researching things just to make Chris look dumb.  Where did all the heroin go?  Why did RFK Jr. turn his back on his beliefs?  Will Ja'marr Chase play this year and why are all the older white guys mad about him not practicing?   Jason tries to catch Chris in a trick just to call him gay.  Chris is boycotting Kroger.  All that and a bag of sour stew that I stole from a bum!  Join in!

Hello peckerheads!  You know what they say, it's the dog's dong days of August so join us as we bang out another masterpiece of nothing.  Chris convinces Jason that Brittney Griner has an adam's apple?  Chris doesn't convince Jason that illegals are just handed cars, houses, and food stamps when they enter the country.  Is Chris the last person alive that masturbated to records?  Does Kamala have this election wrapped up?  Jason causes a wreck on a major bridge.  Chris loves Chinese child labor.  Why are dudes hanging out behind the dumpster?  Chris falls in love with a little person on TikTok You'll find out about all this and much more if you just tune in.  Get to it, daggerdong!

Hello Bobby Brown fans!  Join us as we verbally hump around on a Thursday morning.  We get an email letting us know the show is going down the dumper because we have nothing prepared.  We answer by doing a podcast earlier than we've ever done before with absolutely nothing prepared.   Join Jason for a wake and bake while Chris is in his element as an old man in the morning.  Who is going number 1 in the fantasy football draft?  Will the cuck get a string of anal beads hung over his nose next time?  Chris informs a couple about their ugly genitalia.  We discuss recreational marijuana and how Ohio sharted the sheets.  Joke of the week returns and some other stuff.  Join in.  I'm tired.  

Hello bucket o' turds!  Join the fellas for the greatest podcast since the last one.  We discuss Last Suppergate and ask why are all these straight dudes watching the Olympics anyway?  Speaking of dudes, the lady boxer from Algeria isn't one so shut up already.  Why does JD Vance think he's from Appalachia when he's clearly from regular ol' trashy Middletown?  Chris hates all truckers.  Jason is still an unemployed loser.  A lady from the nursing home has fun playing with her dominos.  Black people party better than white people.  Football is about to start.  I'm just saying things at this point.  Listen to the damn show and shut up.  

Hey there goofy patriots and dirty commies!  Come join the fellas as America continues to fall into chaos.  We discuss the assassination attempt and how dumb the fall out has been.  Biden looked in the mirror and noticed that he was old but now what the hell are the democrats supposed to do?  Are women more horny the day after their fathers die?  Does Eminem's new album suck?  Are regular cuck stories from Chris too boring now after the nightgown fella?  Is Jack Black a bad friend?  Can you milk a goat with your mouth?  We answer all of these questions and much more.  Tune in or I'll tickle your cousin in a weird way.  

Hello, ya dirty dissidents!  Join the fellas for another remarkable podcast about nothing.  Jason loses his job and is trying to figure out as a 43 year old what he wants to be when he grows up.  Chris is scared of the recent shootings in the Cincinnati area.  Jason is angry at Grippos chips.  Some lady hit's Chris's car in the middle of this recording and Jason wonders why Chris didn't parlay that into something creepy.  Is the Hawk Tuah crap overdone and why would anyone want snot on their donger?  How much would you charge to sniff 100 jars full of farts?  Does meth turn masculine men into gay fellas?  Why are we still deciding between 2 old weirdos to run our country?  All these questions are answered and much more.  Tune in and then give Jason a full time job with benefits.  Please and Thank You.  

Anyone else suddenly have some free time on their hands?  Even if you don't then force feed yourself a giant helping of Shut Up Cincinnati.  Chris embraces his old white guy and let's loose on Bronny James and Jason's sweet baby girl, Angel Reese.  Jason meets a guy who was brought back to life by an anally inserted popsicle.   The guys laugh together at Joe Biden's old man faces at the debate and then disagree on the outrage that people have over athlete's salaries and who's to blame for high ticket prices.  We talk about other things too but marijuana is legal in Ohio so who has time to type all this crap out.  Just listen or watch or whatever.  

Hey bunker-balls!  It's Monday so that means another outstanding episode of the non-award winning podcast, Shut Up Cincinnati.  Jason wonders why no one thanked him on Juneteenth.  Chris is picking up girls at the battered women shelter.  What the hell is up with states making porn harder to watch?  Why do Amazon drivers always block the road?  When do the democrats finally switch Old Man Biden out with a person that isn't about to die?  Is Chris in love with Butt-eater?  Why do WNBA players make stupid looking lay-ups?  We get to the bottom of all of this meaningless crap and hopefully make you a giggle a couple of times.  Join in!

Hello panty sniffers and toenail inspectors!  Welcome to this week's episode of Shut Up Cincinnati.  As always, the guys answer all of life's important questions and update you on the world's events.  Chris is angry because the price to get his butthole waxed has increased over 50 percent.  Jason gets his life saved by a curse word.  The fellas wonder which one of their friends would be horrible dads and how many of them are still virgins.  Jason gives Chris advice on how to handle his dinner date out as the bull with the cuck couple.  Jason also advises Chris to skip another freak date after gandering at the woman's lady bits.  Do Juggalo's always become meth cooks?  Is it alright to take a selfie with an aborted baby sign?  Why are old ladies spitting at the store?  Join in, it won't hurt too bad.  

Hello pud wackers!  Nice to meet you, now will you please drink this cup of juice and pledge your allegiance to the greatest podcast that never tries.  Join the peckerheads this week as we discuss how junkies keep their balance, why some murdered kids shouldn't really count, and if there are only 16 Eskimos still alive.  Chris is going to have to survive a few months without the love of his life, Miss Butt Eater.  Jason's kid makes fun of him at the dentist.  Fat people don't go to Whole Foods.  What does a cuck order for dinner?  Just listen to the show already.  I'm sick of typing.  

Hey there peckerheads!  It's been a few weeks since the fellas blessed you with their silly banter and we'd like to apologize but we won't.  Instead, just join us this week for a brand new hour of non-sense!  Could you jerk off to the Invasion of Normandy?  Should drug dealers use chop sticks or plastic forks?  Should you beat the snot out of the kid at King's Island who is taking his job too serious and costing you prime coaster seats?  Did Nathan even talk on this episode?  Should Chris eat a casual dinner with a guy who is about to watch him go balls deep into his wife while wearing a cage around his junk?  We answer all these questions and much more.  Watch, listen, whatever!!!!

Hello mutant muffs!  Join us for another wonderful podcast that is bound to change your life.  Jason has eye aids and Chris is thinking about becoming an independent porn videographer.  An old sex offender friend has made the news again but not for peepin' this time.  Some lady leaves rib bones in Chris's car.  Jason proves he's a horrible person....again.  Is Cher rock n' roll?  Is 16 years too long to leave your contacts in?  Would Stone Cold Steve Austin be a good president?  We answer all these questions plus solve world hunger in just over an hour.  Join in!  

Hello wieners!  The guys are back after a 2 week hiatus to save humanity with a podcast about nothing important.  We talk about our guys trip and find out if anyone pooped on the floor.  We wonder if our audience can buy us a flame throwing dog to clean snow off the driveway and catch really homeless people on fire.  Chris gets made fun of at the T-Mobile store for being really old and dumb.  Is Boeing out there just killing people before they can testify against them?  Is Jason going to be forced to be a flag football coach?  Why does Chris care if a guy has a job before he blows them?  We find all these answers and 3 scientists once said if you listen to this podcast that your junk will grow a half inch!   Listen pud-wackers!  

Hey there worm wranglers!  Join us for another funky rendition of the Shut Up Cincinnati Podcast.  This week we say goodbye to an American hero, OJ Simpson.  Jason gives a ride to a dirty stripper who makes him hold her ice cream.  Chris farts on a guy and blames it on Indian food.  The nightgown couple is coming to town for a concert so we guess which band a cuck would want to see.  Jason has nerd rage against the WWE and Chris thinks Tanisha is a horrible person.  We read an ad where a guy asks for what has to be an impossible situation.  What do Indians eat for breakfast?  What the hell is a polenta and why does it sound like something you'd stick in your butt?  Would you kill your ex for the kids sake if you found out she was banging a waiter?  All these questions are answered plus we figure out world peace and stuff.  Join in, bologna bite!

After missing last week due to a going to jail for killing a family while trying to dodge a polar bear in Kentucky, the boys are back and ready to talk about nothing.  What the hell is up with Diddy?  Who would live in a funeral home?  Will the great white hope, Caitlin Clark, save the WNBA?  Why would you take poop straight from a pigs butt?  We talk about other stuff but I'm in a hurry right now.  

Hey there!  We got a doozy for you this week.  Chris visits the cuck in the nightgown for part 2 of epic sexual savagery.  Ryan and Jason give Chris feedback and congratulate him for peeing on their floor.  Detective Bauman dives deep and finds the suspects in the dong licking kitty case.  Jason tries hard not to go off on a slow kid at Kroger.  The guys share scabies stories and wish death on a man in an old person's home.  All that and much more.  Join in!

Welcome turd cutters!  Join the fellas for another marvelous podcast that will change your life.   The guys discuss why dildos are usually pink, if they would take a picture with Donald Trump, and NFL free agency.  Who is leaving rubber ducks at Chris's house?  Should you get jail time for threatening death if 2 people don't hug each other?  Would you take a dead person through the bank line to get his money?  Have you ever thought of going to the Giraffe feeding exhibit with lettuce in your butt?  We answer all these questions and start our investigation of who gets pleasured by their cat.  Listen!

Hey there bird brain!  Yeah, You!  Listen to this wonderful podcast about all the important things and absolutely nothing at the same time.  Do freaks who take part in beastiality consider if the animal is male or female?  What would you do if a kitten licked your thang while you were romances yourself?  Why do people with Jeeps suck?  Is Chris a complete loser for having a Panda Express app on his phone?  If you saw a man on fire would you point a gun at him or locate a way to extinguish the fire?  Are cats completely made from the skin of ballsacks?  Will Joe Biden fix the problem with self checkouts at Kroger?  We answer all these questions and much more on this week's episode of Shut Up Cincinnati!!!!!

Hey there fatties!  Join the fellas for the worlds best podcast.  The guys talk about homeless boogers, cursing children, and listeners that they don't like.  Patrick Mahomes should be kicked out of the NFL for the violence in Kansas City.  Subway hasn't made a good sandwich in 20 years.  No amount of Cheese Coneys are going to save old crusty Coney Island.  Can you be a straight male and follow Taylor Swift on tour?  Join in this week and we figure this crap out.  

Hey there butter balls!  Join the fellas for another celebration of absolutely nothing.  Jason sets his sites on Jesus on Ash Wednesday while Chris is more focused on hating Travis Kelce.  The guys tell you why Usher's halftime show was mid at best regardless of what our goofy friends think.  Jason thinks MC Hammer should be the new messiah.  Chris sets a date to once again bang a lady in front of her husband while he wears a nightgown but this time he vows to degrade the cuck properly.  Ron Carter calls in to give us his a$$holes of the week and the guys couldn't disagree more with half of his argument.  Is Pat Mahomes the goat?  Does Trevor Bauer deserve a second chance?  Why does Jason have marijuana ashes on his forehead?  All these questions are answered and we also solve all the worlds issues in the process.  Join in or we will marinate your cousin with alligator spunk!

Hello plumpers!  Join the fellas for another fabulous podcast about nothing important.  Toby Keith is the first to die in the 2024 Death Pool.  We discuss 2 new entries into the pool and Chris's early lead.  Killer Mike wins a few Grammys and pushes down a security guard.  Jay Z whines about his wife not getting enough awards.  New music sucks.  Chris tells us about being a drug mule.  Jason leaves his dog outside for 7 hours in 20 degree weather.  Chris is too old to know a girl was hitting on him.  Jason tells us why old lady Jean from Clermont county sucks.  Chris hates people that come to work sick and then tell everyone about it.  All that and a big pile of nothing!  Join in for a chuckle or die with regret, your choice!

Hey fellow dark souls!  Welcome to our 4th annual Celebrity Death Pool.  Who will die?  What the hell is stiff person syndrome?  Why does Chris want Cory Feldman to die?  We also discuss who Vince McMahon has been pooping on lately and a few other things.   Enjoy!

Hey smellers of farts!  Join the fellas for an important discussion on absolutely nothing.  Chris gets an ice cold pizza from Marcos.  Just like Matthew Perry, Jason tells a story about his experience with ketamine and a pool.  The guys ask people to enter the Celebrity Death Pool 2024 and talk about last years results.  Jason wonders if Chris's cuck secretly just stares at his starfish the whole time.  We get calls from Dick G in Indiana to say hello and Ronnie Carter with his take on tipping.  The guys deep dive on how and when to tip as well as the consequences of not tipping.  Jason rates his Uber customers from favorite to least favorite.  All that and much more.  Tune in, buttercups.  

Welcome tiddledy winks!  Join the fellas for a celebration for our 200th episode and 4 year birthday.  The guys spend the show theoretically jerking ourselves off for accomplishing nothing.  Rocky Balboa, Whoopi Goldberg, Kim Jung Un, Clint Eastwood, Nina Hartley, Mr. Bert, El Guerro Gordo and Lil Nick swing by the show to congratulate the boys on 200 episodes.  Chris uses the wrong lube and burns his pecker.  Katt Williams is still a crazy person regardless of what the internet says.  Bill Clinton shouldn't be trusted around your teens.  Some of the Epstein documents have been released and Stephen Hawking doesn't get a pass just because he can't move.  Glory holes are starting to offer more options in Europe.  Jason is upset for being called more racist than Chris by a black friend.  All that and more.  Tune in, pecker-necks!

Hey there butthole boofers!  Our pal, Nathan, joins the show today for a couple chuckles with the fellas.  We discuss how much Nathan has changed for the worse since he got his hernia fixed.  Chris does some soul searching that somehow just ends up with him looking at perverted terms on the internet.  Patrick Mahomes is still just a spoiled child.  Jason and Nathan try to convince Chris to cook his a cuck a spooge casserole.   All that and we solve the all the world's biggest issues in the process.  Tune in, peckerheads!

Hello blue waffle enthusiasts!  The fellas are joined by everyone's favorite gold star gay, Brent Wolgamott.  Brent gives Chris constructive criticism on how to deal with a cuck who shows up in a nightgown.  Brent describes being the victim of a hate crime in downtown Cincinnati.  The guys discuss local sex ads and what kind of people actually respond to them.  Brent tells us about his recent engagement but don't expect monogamy in his future.  Brent explains why STD's aren't really a big deal these days.  All that and some other stuff that I forgot about because I killed all my brain cells in my twenties.  Join in!

Hey bootyhole inspectors!  Join the fellas for another glorious episode of Shut Up Cincinnati.  Chris is admired by a co-worker for having a pink butthole.  The guys discuss how kids are horrible humans to each other.  Chris spits a goober on an old lady's windshield.  Hairy guy is taking advantage of the elderly.  The guys admit to being old whites that can't keep up with the vernacular of the youth.  Chris updates us on the cuck in the nightgown and Jason encourages to slap him with his nut hand.  All that and we figure out world peace and stuff.  Tune in, pecker heads!

Hey there ya turkeys!!!!  Before you gobble those nuts, take in all the fellas have to offer this week.  We explain why glory holes aren't made for fat people.  We tell Cincinnati to shut up about AJ McCarron and why the Bengals should just tank the rest of the season.  Hairy Guy and GP are interested in settling the rubber match in their rivalry and the guys discuss using electricity and nipple clamps as part of the competition.  The guys think of starting steroids.  Willie Cunningham is still an idiot.  All that and more, tune in peckerhead!

Tiddilyhoo peckerheads!  Sit down and enjoy a nice conversation with the fellas.  Jason loves Draymond Green and Brett Favre after disliking them previously.  Chris hates it when people put up Christmas trees in November.  The guys debate whether necros are actually providing a service for the dead.   Will the Cincinnati Bengals make the playoffs?  Is CJ Stroud a unicorn?  Do gay guys bounce balls when banging?  Why is gelato so expensive?   All questions are answered this week on Shut up Cincinnati!  Tune in turnip-tits!

Hello pudlickers!  The fellas are back after a short break and their weird friend, Ryan Acres, joins the podcast for an afternoon of giggles.  Jason beats becomes a 4-time Covid champion.  The guys discuss what century they think men starting going down on women.  Chris updates us on his latest journey as a bull and things go off the rails.   Join in!