Coffee & Wine

In this podcast, Niamh Mitchel and Kendel Paulsen talk about the very important topic of unsolicited advice. We've all done it, we've all received it, and no one likes it! But what is unsolicited advice? Is it really about helping someone or is it about telling them what they are doing wrong in your eyes? Why do we do it and how do we manage ourselves when 1. we receive it and 2. when we dish it out? In this honest conversation, Niamh and Kendel share their experiences of unsolicited advice and they look forward to hearing from you about your own experiences! 

In this episode, Kendel Paulsen and Niamh Mitchel discuss the ridiculousness of giving people the benefit of the doubt. Where did the idea even come from? And what are the resulting painful consequences when we give away our power to others because we're so afraid to offend? In this episode, Kendel and Niamh get real with how they have overcome their personal experiences by giving people the benefit of the doubt, what they've learned, and how they live today.

In this latest podcast, Kendel and Niamh discuss what introverts wish extroverts understood about them. Kendel, as the extrovert, learns a lot in this session from Niamh, the introvert, on how we can actually learn to respect each other in a very healthy, and with great humor, way. Listeners from both camps will learn so much from this exchange about what motivates collaboration with respect and understanding. Sharing lots of laughter together, Kendel and Niamh share their experiences in managing the way they interact with the world and how you can too.

Does where you live feed your soul or does it stop you from fully thriving and reaching your potential? Sometimes inertia keeps us stuck and it can be hard to see all the possibilities. We convince ourselves that what we have is all there is and that we don´t have any choice, but we always have choices. How can we break free from the boxes we put ourselves in? Possibility thinking can activate the imagination and get us thinking about new possibilities which open us up to find creative solutions. 

In this episode, Niamh Mitchell and Kendel Paulsen share their experiences when major changes happen in their lives. Listen to hear how they witnessed their own journeys and what they learned along the way.  Filled with laughter and truth, Nimah and Kendel are happy to have you here and look forward to hearing about your experiences and challenges during significant life transitions. Make sure to leave your comments below.

In this episode, Niamh and Kendel share the six stages of change starting with "pre-contemplation" - a.k.a - Sitting In Your Own Sh*t and Not Noticing the Smell. Niamh and Kendel discuss how they have observed clients as well as personal stories of being unwilling to change, denying that they are both miserable and capable of change. Using Prochaska and DiClemente's Six Stages of Change, Niamh and Kendel walk the listener through the evolution to a happier, more fulfilling life.If you are starting to notice the smell, Niamh and Kendel are ready to help you make a change in your life so you can move from the sh*t to the garden! Nimah Mitchell @ hello@niamhmitchell.comKendel Paulsen @ kendel@purposedrivenlc.com

In this episode of Coffee and Wine, Niamh and I have the great honor of interviewing Elizabeth Ahern. With her impressive and distinguished resume, you will find this conversation both enlightening and very informative.As the Director of the U.S. Commercial Service office in Illinois, Elizabeth is the executive in the field representing the practices and policies of the U.S. government and leads the export ecosystems with trade promotion operations oversight for the U.S. Department of Commerce's International Trade Administration.Elizabeth has over 20 years of international business experience, spanning the private sector, academia, not-for-profit, and public service.  Also, an entrepreneur that founded her own consulting firm focusing on international business operations.  She has an executive master's in international business studies from Saint Louis University and a bachelor's in history/political science and Spanish. She is fluent in Spanish and has knowledge of French and Portuguese.A Certified Global Business Professional (CGBP) and holds a certification in Change Management and the Board Leadership Program from the University of Denver.  Additionally, Elizabeth is an Executive Coach and serves as an internal coach within her bureau – The International Trade Administration at the U.S. Department of Commerce. In 2020 her coaching cadre won the prestigious ICF (International Coaching Federation) International Prism Award.  Case study:  https://coachingfederation.org/app/uploads/2021/06/2020-Prism-Case-Study_ITA.pdfPress release:  https://coachfederation.org/blog/international-coaching-federation-announces-2020-prism-award-honoreesTo connect with Elizabeth, the following is her contact information: Elizabeth_ahern@yahoo.com

How to fight fairly is one of the biggest challenges individuals struggle with. Learn how Kendel and Niamh have navigated fighting fairly in their own relationships, what they've learned, and how they have grown to understand what is at the core of a fair fight. To connect with either Niamh Mitchell (niamhmitchellcoaching@gmail.com) or Kendel Paulsen (kendel@purposedrivenlc.com) please email them today!

In this episode, we talk with Brent Ericson, a professor at George Mason University and a professional coach. In his capacity as a coach, Brent shares with us his journey in managing a personal and professional crisis and how he discovered the art of resilience, something many of us need during these difficult times of pandemic, war, and economic upheaval. To connect and learn more, you can contact Brent Ericson at ericsobr@gmail.com. 

Whether it´s asking for a need to be met, asserting a boundary, or asking for a raise, we all encounter conversations that we find challenging to have. Have you ever tried to express yourself in one of these situations only to find yourself tripping over your words, not making your point effectively, or letting other not-so-relevant things get in the way? If you have you are not alone. In this episode, we share a nifty little tool with you that will help you communicate more effectively and with EASE!  You can find a downloadable version of DEAR MAN here. If you found it useful there is also a more detailed worksheet on the site for further exploration. Got comments, questions, or suggestions for things you´d like us to cover in future episodes? We would love to hear from you. You can contact us at Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Women spend much of their time caring for other's needs, putting themselves last on the list. As a result, many of us lose our voice and our sense of value. Kendel takes us through her latest talk to the American Women's Business Association Maryland Capitol Chapter. In this presentation, she shared with the audience how we, as women, lose our sense of value and the 5 significant actions we need to take to regain our power! 

We´ve all heard of the inner critic but his equally problematic sibling the outer-critic doesn´t seem to get half as much airtime.  When we are operating from our outer critic, even as an internal dialogue, it separates us from other people. It´s us and them, me and that bunch of (fill in the expletive here) And to make matters worse, when we catch ourselves it can do a 180 and active the inner critic. But like any other thinking habit, and that´s all it really is, we can change it with a little bit of mindfulness, a lot of patience, and a few tips which we´ll share with you in this episode. To contact us or find out more about how to work with us check out our websites below Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/

Have you ever tried to form a new habit only to start off strong and then have it fizzle out fast? Whether it´s going to the gym or starting to eat healthier, we often go in strong and give up before it´s had time to stick leaving us feeling deflated and demotivated. Min habits take the hardship out of habit-building, this week we talk about how you can break down any activity into the smallest possible size to really set yourself up for success. To contact us or find out more about how to work with us check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Imagine if you could make your life a whole lot easier by agreeing to 4 simple yet powerful precepts? In this week´s episode, we talk about Don Miguel´s book The Four Agreements and how applying these simple yet impactful principles to your life you can invite in more eace and tranquilty. Simple yes, easy not always - but defintely worth a try. The Four Agreements is available for purchase anywhere books are sold!To contact us or find out more about how to work with us check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

We can all get too serious, forgetting the importance of fun and lightness in our lives. We underestimate it´s impact and take for granted that it will arise of its own accord. In this week's episode, we talk about fun in the run-up to Thanksgiving. Yeah, we know Thanksgiving was a month ago but hey, life happens and we are learning to not take it so seriously. And well, the same lessons apply to Christmas or any part of the year really. 

Winter is a time for releasing, reflection, restoration, and renewal. It is a time for silence and solitude; a time to go within so why do we resist it so much? Why do we end up feeling depleted rather than restored?This week we talk about what it´s like to embrace winter, to slow down and listen to the natural rhythms of our bodies so our internal energy supply lasts right the way through the season instead of getting burned up before we even reach the mid-point. Do you have a favourite way to embrace winter? Leave a message in the comments to share your rituals and traditions with others so we can all benefit from each other's sparks of inspiration. 

The American psychologist Albert Ellis is credited with coining the phrase 'stinking thinking' to describe the human tendency to persistently engage with thoughts that do not serve us. Stinking thinking language fosters a bad way of thinking that makes you believe you will fail, that bad things will happen to you, or that you are not a very good person. The good news is that you can combat your stinking thinking by making a few changes in your life by changing how you see your world through a positive lens of possibilities. To contact us or find out more about how to work with us check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/  

This week we talk to Lalia Helmer, leadership coach and author of The Entrepreneurs mindset; how to rewire your brain for business success. We talk about the trials and  joys of writing a book, what mental skills and mindsets the most successful entrepreneurs have in common and how you can start building those qualities in yourself. Lalia Helmer is an organizational psychologist and leadership coach and the author of  The Entrepreneurs mindset; how to rewire your brain for business success out November 2021If you would like to connect with Lalia you can reach her on LinkedIn or through her website https://laliahelmer.com/

That post-holiday glow can quickly turn into a panicky sweat as you realize everything you need to do to get on top of things. We give you a simple yet effective way to deal with overwhelm courtesy of The Wellness  Society. The DOD method will get you moving swiftly into action in no time at all. The Wellness Society describes its resources as fluff-free, exactly how we like it here on Coffee and Wine. For even more mental health resources, check out https://thewellnesssociety.org/ To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

If you find yourself in relationship dynamics that pull you out of your centre and cause you to react rather than respond you might be operating from the drama triangle. This week we talk about the three roles you will find in the Karpman drama triangle and what their corresponding roles are on the Empowerment Dynamic, and most importantly how to move from drama to empowerment so you can respond instead of reacting. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

We´ve all heard that by sitting with our emotions they pass through us quickly- except when they don´t.  We know we shouldn´t numb our emotions, but is it okay to distract ourselves from them? And where´s the line? How can we tell the difference between numbing and distracting? When it comes to our emotions we are often not the most adept at deciphering their meaning. It doesn´t help when we hear mixed and often contradictory messages from experts.  This week we are clarifying some of the information that is being bandied around about emotions, we explain the difference between natural and manufactured emotions and how to tell them apart and give you some tips for getting up close and personal with these very important messengers. 

The way we work and our attitudes to work have changed dramatically as we moved into the  age of information, but have they changed to our benefit or to our detriment? This week we talk about some of the trends we are noticing in our coaching practices, and some ideas of what you can do if you discover that the way you work is not serving you. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Marlene Zehnter talks to us about TRE, stress releasing, and how to become a work lover by releasing stress and defining what work is for you. Marlene is passionate about supporting people who feel stressed, unfulfilled, or insecure at work to become healthy work-lovers, human beings who create and live their own definition of work. With her background in TRE® (Tension & Trauma Release Exercises), she helps people to re-connect with their bodies and bring this embodied connection into the offices. She is on a mission to de-stress work one nervous system at a time.You can contact Marlene on Facebook, LinkedIn or by email at marlene.zehnter.tensionrelease@gmail.com

Do you feel like communicating with your teenager is a constant struggle? Do you feel like they just don´t listen and you can´t get through to them? Are you desperately wishing for their adolescent years to be a thing of the past so you can finally relate to them in a way that feels connected? What if you didn´t have to wait? What if you could have a great relationship with your teenager now? Well, you can. Dr. Cam Caswell Ph.D. shares with us some of the wisdom she has gleaned from her years of experience as a psychologist for adolescents and family success coach. The power to communicate well with your teen is in your hands, and it all starts with you!If you would like to work with Dr. Cam or find out more about her check out her website here https://www.askdrcam.com/If you would like to connect with Niamh or Kendel check them out at https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ and  http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/ 

These days meditation is being lauded as a cure for all ails. Meditation is a wonderful tool, it does have a wide range of scientifically proven benefits BUT it is not for everyone. So if you have struggled with meditation, or tried it and found it to be a not-so-pleasant experience this episode is for you. And if you are looking for some alternatives to breath-focused sitting meditation to calm your mind tune in. To find out more about David Trelevan and his amazing work on Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness check out his website here https://davidtreleaven.com/ To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

We kick off this week's episode with a quote from Will Smith: "She should be happy and I should be happy individually. Then we come together and share our happiness. Giving someone a responsibility to make you happy when you can't do it for yourself is selfish"It can be hard to take responsibility for our own happiness but it can be even harder to give someone back the responsibility for theirs. Can you even tell the when your boundaries are shaky? This week we ponder what it means to take ownership of your own happiness when you need to put up boundaries, and the difference between being responsible for and responsible to someone. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Anniversaries are always hard when you have lost a loved one, but the first anniversary is a particularly hard one for most people.  In this week´s episode, Kendel shares her very real and raw experience of what it´s like for her, one year after losing her father. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/  

This month's guest is Singapore-based life coach Yujuan Wang. Yujuan uses her MA in positive psychology and her specialism in Strengths coaching to help her clients connect to what they want from life. Yujuan also coaches in both English and Chinese allowing her to serve even more people. If you are interested in getting in touch with Yujuan you can connect with her in various ways. Website: https://www.strengthscoachyj.com/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmBNcUqrMbEXlV5JOnrqDZQPodcast: https://apple.co/32L5VQn 

One of the reasons we don´t say o when we really want to, or vice versa,  is because we feel guilty...but doing this too often has a greater price - resentment. This week we talk about how uncomfortable feelings can stop us from saying what we really want and the not-so-hidden cost of doing this on a regular basis. So if you do things because you feel guilty, this episode is for you. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/  

We all know that different people have different ways of communicating, but we rarely if ever apply this to how we communicate love! According to Gary Chapman, author of The 5Love Languages there are- you guessed it- 5 principal ways we communicate love. Problems arise when we don´t understand how we or the people we care about communicate or if there is a mismatch in styles. This week we are talking all about love, what the love languages are and how we use them. If you want to find out what your main love languages are check out the quiz here https://www.5lovelanguages.com/To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/  

Being a full-time caregiver is not an easy task and caregivers are often an undervalued and overlooked group in our society. This week we had the pleasure of talking to Cathy Murphy about the importance of caring for the caregiver and how she has dedicated her life to helping these amazing people reconsider their own needs and wants and putting steps in place to start moving towards them.  If you want to work with Cathy or find out more about what she does you can contact her on healthylivingnavigator@gmail.com or  HealthyLivingNavigator.com To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/

Are you or someone you know chronically late? Have you considered the impact that chronic lateness has on the people who show up on time? Or do you find your self feeling frustrated by always having to wait? Like many of our behaviours,  there can important information hidden in continuous lateness. Are ready to find out what it is? Join us this week as we discuss chronic lateness and all it means as well as a couple of questions to ask yourself if you are the tardy one. To contact us or find out more about how to work with us check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Are you finding that it´s hard to shake off your low motivation especially as this pandemic drags on without an end in sight? Are the usual tools you rely on just not cutting it? This week we look at a few ways to change your perspective so you can reconnect to your inspiration and motivation in a fun, relaxed way. 

WOOP the simple, science-backed methodology to reach your goals and finally build the habits you want to build. In this episode, we demonstrate the WOOP technique- it can help you to stop making excuses, make progress on your goals and finally make those habits stick. To find out more about WOOP https://woopmylife.org/To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

In this episode, we are joined by the lovely Alexa Doman, a life and career coach who is talking to us about how to design a self-care self-care menu and ways to close off and honour the day as a way to mindfully prepare for sleep. If you want to find out more about Alexa or her work you can mind her @alexadomancoaching or www.alexadoman.com And as always you can reach Kendel or myself at Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

This week we have the wonderful Karen Laos joining us as we talk about needs, communication and how to be a powerful presence on and off camera. Karen is keynote speaker and leadership coach equipping women to stand out with unshakable confidence. She specializes in communication: executive presence and compelling messages. Karen champions female business leaders to own their value and find their voice so they can be seen and heard. She also works with teams to create cultures of trust and function at their best.Connect with Karen:Website: https://www.karenlaos.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karenlaosconsultingLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karenlaos/Facebook: Ignite Your Confidence with Karen Laos: https://www.facebook.com/groups/karenlaosconsultingYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEwQoTGdJX5eME0ccBKiKng/videos

Do you ever feel like your efforts to do things differently in your life are a total slog? You might be falling prey to one size fits all advice that doesn´t take into account our individual differences.  This week we talk about how we are lead to believe that there is something wrong with us when we don´t do things the way the ´experts´ say we should and how harnessing what you have might be a far more effective strategy. 

In this episode special guest, health coach Roshan Chhatralia gives us some insight into the best ways to start making changes toward a healthier lifestyle. With practical advice that´s easy to start applying to your life getting healthy has never felt so accessible. If you want to get in touch with Roshan or follow him on social media check out the links below. https://roshanchhatralia.com/IG @roshanchhatralia

Most of us experience low moods or anxiety from time to time, what we don´t do is plan for when that happens. Having an action plan of simple things to support or comfort us, to energise or calm us can mean that we don´t let these moods stop us in our tracks. We become better equipped to manage our emotions and that allows us to move through ou funks faster. This week we talk about how to create your personal ´in case of emergency plan.To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

It´s hard getting back into the groove after a long holiday, especially in the winter.  Today we talk about ways to make it easier for yourself and how to spot if there´s more going on than the post-holiday blues. Do you want to work with us or find out more about what we do? Check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

This week we talk about why  New´s Resolutions should be kicked to the curb.  Stop making resolutions and start setting goals instead. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

It´s easy to feel dread when you know you´re about to get feedback, but it doesn´t have to be a terrifying, soul-destroying experience.  A slight shift in your perspective could have you welcoming most feedback and knowing what to ignore  completely. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

How we deal with expectations can have a huge influence on how we meet them, knowing about the way you habitually respond will give you the upper hand and help you to conquer those goals and meet outer expectations ( if you choose to ) This week we are talking about The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Ruben you can take the quiz here https://quiz.gretchenrubin.com/  To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

It´s not about finding yourself, it´s about uncovering yourself. We learn to hide so much of our true self in order to be safe, to fit in and belong. And what´s worse is we also learn to take on the voices that told us to play small, or dampen down our spirit. This week we share a simple technique to re-discover your essence and to soften your self talk a little to bring a bit more self-compassion into your life. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

When we think of the things that hold us back what tends to pop up first are things like fear of failure, limiting beliefs or lack of direction. We don´t often think about the fear of success. This week Kendel talks about how on her journey inward she discovered the impact the fear of success had on her life, and how that, in turn, inspired her to make it the topic of her upcoming book so that others can learn to recognise it and do something about it sooner rather than later.To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

If you are inclined to stay within your comfort zone and avoid taking risks or making mistakes it may be because you grew up in a judgemental environment. It´s easy to dismiss throw way comments that subtly take a swipe at someone else, but should we allow this to continue? Join us as we share our opinions on the effects of criticism to our self-esteem.To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Many us would struggle to identify more than a few of our strengths, yet we´d probably be able to list off a load of weaknesses if we were asked. We spend so much time trying to fix our weaknesses instead of maximising our strengths. This week we explore some ways to find out what your strengths are and the benefits of focusing on them. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Is it possible to stop being ´nice´ without being a total b****? We bite our tongues way to much and we think it´s time to start calling people out on their bad behaviour, stop doing things we don´t want to do and start being more authentic while still being a decent human being. Here is the video from Megan Devine that inspired this weeks episode https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjoGpfNjFrk&t=3sTo contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

In this episode, we talk about how the "what ifs" of weight loss could be keeping you stuck, how coaching can help you through transitions and how to prepare for a big change in your life. To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/ 

Let's face it, for the first time in history the whole world is winging it. This week we talk and laugh a lot about how damn hard it is to figure out how to behave situations that were once so ordinary and banal. Have you made a quarantine faux pas? I bet you have! To contact us or find out more about our work check out our websites below Kendel http://www.purposedrivenlc.com/Niamh https://www.niamhmitchell.com/