V'Ger Please!

A wacky camping adventure turns into a series defining nightmare as we review the close of DS9's second season with "The Jem'Hadar"! The goofy odd couple antics of Sisko and Quark is interrupted when the Actual Plot rolls in. The Gamma Quad Murder Hobos make quite a statement to draw the USS Odyssey, and then things definitely get much worse. 

Chief O'Brien has a little more suffering to do before we wrap Season 2 as we review "Tribunal"! When Miles and Keiko go on vacation and try to fool around in the company car, buzzkill Gul Evek shows up and reroutes the vacation into the worlds most nightmarish legal drama. Can Odo use his Saul Gackman powers to buy the Starfleet gang the time they need? 

Seal the doors and prep the white smoke because the Conclave is here as we review "The Collaborator"! Bajor's shadiest cleric wants to steal the Space Pope Hat away for herself, but can Cardinal McDreamy pull himself away from Kira and the Orb of Sexytime long enough to stop her? 

It turns out Peter saw the future pretty clearly when he guessed how the Mirror Universe would go when we review "Crossover"! We step into Eeeeevil DS9 as Mirror Kira vamps it up, Garak is a subtly free goon, and Mirror Odo is packed full of explodium! Strap in folks it's a wild ride!

Our favorite tailor that talks in italics gives us his bloody/tragic backstories as we tackle "The Wire". We get two scoops of great acting as Bashir attempts to save his enigmatic friend from the drug addiction of Happy Brain Juice. Garak is unsure he wants to be saved, but one thing is for sure - we want more Enabran Tain. 

Nothing quite like the local highly charismatic genocidal bad guy to be your zany road trip partner as we review "The Maquis Pt 2". While Cal Hudson still sucks, everything else about this episode is rad. We got fights against Space Toyota Technicals, plenty of sinister dialogue, and we even get to see Quark win an argument with The World's Hottest Vulcan. 

At last, your faithful podcaster reach the origin point for the most underbaked, poorly explained antagonistic force in all of Berman-era Trek as we review "The Maquis, Pt1"! When a bad actor shows up to play Sisko's totally-not-a-terrorist best friend, we get a fantastic buddy cop road trip with Dukat, some seriously dickish Cardassians, and your hosts lamenting for 20 minutes about how much better it all could have been with minimal effort. 

It's quite a day on the station when all of Dax's drinking-and-violence buddies show up in "Blood Oath"! All of Kirk's all adversaries are here to go kill the Worst Guy Ever, Jadzia has some very awkward conversations with the local terrorist to get a feel for how murder wears on you. You know this one is good, so watch it and listen after!

We are somehow on yet another episode about Quark getting laid as we review "Profit and Loss"! Garak and our favorite bartender are two great tastes that taste great together as we have an episode of romance, intrigue, and an complete lack of coherent storytelling in the final act...but hey, who cares when the rest is this good!

The third time is a charm on the Dax backstory episode as we review the shockingly good "Playing God". When some guy with limited personality shows up to learn the secrets of having a slug in the gut, we get some wacky science nonsense, O'Brien and Kira trying to indulge their murder lust, and just enough time to talk over Bajor having some suspect laws on the books. 

Sometimes it's a boring day in the Trek office as we review "Shadowplay"! Nothing but a lot of old man actors not pronouncing words right in the A plot, but hey - at least we find out Quark isn't above nefariously getting Kira laid so as to commit crimes! 

Somehow, Commander Sisko winds up in an accidental episode of Roots as we watch "Paradise"! In between all the torture and forced field labor, can Ben and Miles find a way to deprogram a cult? Meanwhile, we find out Dax is very casual about runabout safety standards. 

We get a double dose of Irish Suffering as we review "Whispers"! Miles is doing some dramatic monologues as he tries to unravel a conspiracy, but can anything really compare to Keiko hitting the runner-runner on Sisko having to tell her bad news about her husband? 

We get a bit too much TNG in our DS9 as we tackle the very odd "Armageddon Game". When Miles and Julian go on an under explained work trip, some local Christmas Elves decide to murder everyone. Why is this happening? Who knows, but at least we know Julian loves feet. 

Despite all his rage, Odo is just some goo in a cage as we review "The Alternate. When Odo's step-dad pops in to annoy his son, a monster hunt ensues, O'Brien gets sent into Viet Cong tunnels, and this ensemble show casually demonstrates its power. 

Our heroes have to wade through some real underbaked nonsense as we try to make some sense of "Rivals"! When a local space con man finds a handy device that breaks laws of probability, wacky events ensue! Seriously, the best part of this involves Julian and Miles playing racquetball. 

We have a true V'Ger Please special as we interview Matt, the mind behind the YouTube channel 'Feral Historian'! We dig deep on our Star Trek takes, his approach to making such layered video essays, and if there was any way to have ever made Enterprise watchable.    PLEASE subscribe to Matt's channel! https://www.youtube.com/@feralhistorian

Nothing quite like like a good dose of Voyager style goo hair and untreated skin rashes to make a bad episode worse as we review "Sanctuary". Get ready to hear a very obvious message over and over for the world's least sympathetic victims of the week. Even Kira and Quark can't save this one.

The most eligible widower on the Space Flying J meets the most fetching space elf of all time as we review "Second Sight". When the world's most charming douchebag shows up to Genesis device a star, Sisko falls in love with his wife. Kind of? Really just watch this one for the Ben/Jake scenes. 

It's a dark and stormy night on Azeroth (literally) as we review "Necessary Evil". Odo puts on his sharp suit and fedora as he works to crack the case of an old murder. We got femme fatales, kablamo guns, conspiracies, Dukat, stabbed security guards, dramatic narrations...what else could you want?

Nothing like a story of tragic romance featuring a character named Pel to excite your hosts as they review "Rules of Acquisition"! When Zek shows up to bribe Kira and send Quark on a wine buying mission, we Twelfth Night the heck out of the Gamma Quad. Can Dax help Quark find love?

Nothing like a mid-season script hackjob to bring your hosts down as we review the difficult "Melora". A deeply irritating woman comes to DS9, Julian is attracted to her for no particular reason, we get clumsy disability allegory, but at least Odo gets to watch Quark suffer! 

When a humble tailor can't keep his hands to himself, we are gifted the opportunity to review "Cardassians"! After Garak gets bit, the galaxy's most complex custody battle takes place. O'Brian gets to be extremely racist, Dukat gets to chew scenery, and Bashir might want to think about locking his door. 

Our man Death Row Sisko starts throwing ALL the hands as we enjoy "Invasive Procedures". When nebbish John Glover Trill shows up to claim the Dax symbiote, the most wild throwdown ever seen in Trek pops off. Did Tim Russ get hit so hard it made Tuvok bad at security? You decide! 

The air is thick with plot resolutions as we wrap up the Bajoran Coup arc with "The Siege"! While Space Nixon tries to seal the deal, Sisko and company engage in annoying antics, Kira and Dax bond while nearly dying, and we stand in wonder of delightful creative arrogance of it all. 

The Space Nixon action is only heating up as we review "The Circle". We are only two episodes in and it's like we are reading a book with this level of plot density. Bajoran coups! Single shot comedy scenes! Very sexy orbs! Jump in for a wild ride.

The Deep Space Nine Quality Train hits us hard right out of the gate, as we review the Season 2 premiere - "The Homecoming". When Space Nixon show us talking about to Make Azeroth Great Again, you can count on Kira to rescue a famous Bajoran leader with the help of a loveable Irish pimp. All this before Sisko has even finished his coffee! 

We wrap up our look at the "Genesis Trilogy" as we review the classic "Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home"! Joseph defends this light comedy classic, while Peter insists that it's just bad, dated, nonsense slop. Who is right? Listen and find out! 

The amazing, fantastic Wrath of Khan is followed up by...a kinda cheap, sloppy retcon? Sadly that is the case as we review "ST III: The Search for Spock" ! While the crew pulls off the prototype 'Starfleet has no security' heist, Doc Klingon Brown and his lads show up for some Cold War allegory.

Your podcast heroes treat themselves to the very finest vintage in the Trek cannon in one of our Patreon reviews - "The Wrath of Khan"! We absorb Trek asserting itself as a genuine dramatic world, the Horatio Hornblower in space vibe, and how this made everything else Trek even possible. 

As demanded by principal, practice, and pattern, welcome to the Season One RIP for Deep Space Nine? Join our LIVE takedown of the season-that-was! What was the best episode? Was Move Along Home really the worst? Come find out!

We wrap up DS9's first season as we review the finale, "In The Hands of the Prophets"! Religious conflict, educational policy, and politics large and small all factor in as Deep Space Nine finally figures out what it is going to be about - just as the true big bad of the series shows up.    LINK TO JUNE'S GOFUNDME: https://gofund.me/3b01b681https://gofund.me/3b01b681https://gofund.me/3b01b681https://gofund.me/3b01b681

We set (most) of the comedy aside as we go deep on one of Trek's strongest dramatic entries as we review "Duet"! When Kira encounters a man who may be the Bajoran equivalent of Rudolph Hess, she is faced with the kind of complex moral questions that transcends Trek as a medium.  Come on the journey with us!

What fresh brain jacking hell will be birthed from the highway of death this time as we watch "Dramatis Personae"? Well we lose our minds a bit as we consider the sheer madness of the Gamma Quad and lament another bad plot, but at least Peter gets to ruminate on the Naughty Kira possibilities. 

The mother-in-law all of us fear but none of us deserve drops in to the local DOOM level in "The Forsaken". Between the half baked A and C plots, you know an episode is bad when the Lwaxana Troi is the best part. Is the Odo backstory worth the price of admission? Come find out!

I know what you are thinking. You see the title, and you look down on us. But you shouldn't, because we reviewed "If Wishes Were Horses"! Witness as just too many insane things happen to even bother trying to preview, from esoteric baseball continuity, to...emus? 

We get a delightful A plot/B plot sandwich as we review "Progress"! When Bajor ends up doing some Horace Greedly level planetary strip mining, Kira has to face off against her most vicious for to date - an extremely charming old man. Meanwhile Jake shows Nog the art of the hustle and the value of property rights. 

Nothing like heading down to Bajor and grabbing a few World Quests as we review "The Storyteller"! The Chief and Julian begin the Bromance of the Ages while tanking a raid boss and avoiding stabbing from space truckers. Also Jake and Nog like girls! Come give it a listen. 

When the local Bajoran quest giver decides to make a quick stop at the local DOOM level, absolutely nothing bad will happen as we review "Battle Lines". Sisko decides to take Kai Opaka out for a joyride, but things take a grim turn when they crash on planet Breaking Bad. I'm sure none of this will have consequences at all!

Star Trek commits its worst possible sin - being boring  - as we review "Vortex". While we are happy to see an old guest star friend, it won't be long before we are talking about what is in our junk drawers. One thing though....is the Federation ever going to pass a law on menacing or are threats just a love language?

Another one of the part time hitters shows up into the DS9 roster as we review "The Nagus". When Wallace Shaw rolls in with his perfectly drippy makeup, Quark gets plaid for a stooge, Rom tries to murder someone and no one does anything, and Jake shows in Star Trek even teenage rebellion is wholesome. 

The bottom comes for us quickly as we review DS9's most ill-regarded entry, "Move Along Home"! When the finest white trash of the Gamma Quad roll in with their TNG S1 outfits and mullets, we find ourselves agreeing with Ron Moore ... did everyone lose their minds when they made this? 

It's side missions all around for podcasters and flagship bridge officers as we review "Birthright, Part 1"! Staying true to our word to review every episode that takes place on DS9, the crew of The Mighty D pulls in to clear out the quest log. Will Data learn to dream? How many felonies will Worf commit on the station in front of witnesses? Listen and find out!

Nothing like a Turbo Evil Space. Dr. Mengele to spice up life on the frontier as we review "The Passenger". When the new Extremely Bad Guy does a little brain melding via choke, it's a grand time of overacting, poorly hidden identities, sudden executions, and ...brain surgery via transporter?   

Nothing like a touch of that courtroom drama action to get to know all your new characters as we review "Dax"! There is a a cavalcade of veteran Trek guest actors as we get all the detail you may (or may not) have wanted about Dax's boinking both past and present, Detective Odo makes his firm debut, and the plot ends in the strangest way possible. 

The galactic tourist you never want to see drops in as we review "Q Less"! When Enterprise-D's best known homewrecker Vash is found in the Gamma Quad, some fun capitalism breaks out at Quark's, the big glowy thing is the problem, and Q is just there to make fun of the Starfleet JV squad.  JOIN US ON DISCORD: https://discord.gg/dBy4EmFaHJ    

The true Hero of the Working Man makes a friend as we review "Captive Pursuit"! In a future where every copy of "The Most Dangerous Game" was destroyed, Chief O'Brien and his new Gamma Quad drinking buddy engage in a bit of light murder, but are  the real criminals the costume department?

Comedy! Review! Star Trek! Sometimes we also say random words with no connection as we take a look at "Babel"! The Chief gets a case of the weird talkies, Quark gets out his junk drawer of security hacks, and eventually the answer gets volun-told only the way Kira could. 

When Odo runs into his least favorite war profiteering jabroni, his sudden case of getting murdered turns up a while meadow of whoopsie daisies in "A Man Alone." Not only does a very evil bit actor gins up a lynch mob, and somehow this overshadows Bashir straight up accidentally cloning a guy! 

Nothing like the introduction to Trek's best 'humble tailor' to spice up our review of DS9's second episode, "Past Prologue". As local medical doofus Bashir gets hand held through his first bit of tradecraft, the best four best parts of the Klingon Empire show up and Kira learns that its never a good idea to try and outflank your boss. 

At last, your favorite Star Trek podcast arrives at the shady port of call you have all been waiting for as V'Ger Please enters the Deep Space Nine era! Come along with us as we review "Emissary" where Commander Sisko has the worst employee orientation ever, magic orbs are immediately handed out, and the most consequential space hole of all time comes into being.