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What happens when a girl grows up in purity culture and gets married to the first boy who pays attention to her, just so she can have sex? Is purity culture religious abuse? In this episode we hear that story from Gabby. She is a 34-year-old cisgender female. She describes herself as white, straight but open to exploring, currently non-monogamous with three recurring partners. She has two sons, is pre-menopausal, and describes her body as curvy. Bookmark topics: Gabby grew up in purity culture, signed a no-sex contracts in childhood, and discusses “courting” vs dating Gabby's husband had a sudden and seemingly permanent decrease in libido If he's turned off by my genitals, is he gay? Since leaving the church, Gabby's life has changed dramatically, including dating during COVID and exploring polyamory We explore parenting while polyamorous The Lowdown: Gabby answers questions about number of partners, dating different races, sex toys, anal, oral, and choking Resources: Joshua Harris documentary “I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye” trailer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjV6qSeWnL0 Sheila Wray Gregoire – This is the Christian marriage counselor Gabby mentions meeting at a conference. I've reviewed some posts on her site, and while I definitely disagree with her on some things, in general I find her ideas to be palatable - https://sheilawraygregoire.com STARS talk - https://www.goodgirlstalk.com/posts/episode/improve-your-sex-life-with-the-stars-talk Patreon: All archived Good Girls Talk About Sex audio extras are now available for FREE! They can be accessed at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex. I've done this because not everyone has the means to pay for access, and I know this additional material can be deeply important for some listeners. But creating this show isn't free, so if you'd like to support the work I do, I am grateful for your contributions at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex. BE PART OF THE SHOW: Rate this pod: Leave a rating and review at RateThisPodcast.com/goodgirls Have a question or comment - Leave a voicemail for Leah at 720-GOOD-SEX (720-466-3739) - this is a voicemail-only line, so I promise you won't have to talk to someone in person! Be a guest on the show - I'd love to talk with you! Fill out the form at www.leahcarey.com/guest FOLLOW LEAH: Instagram - www.instagram.com/goodgirlstalk YouTube - www.youtube.com/goodgirlstalk Leah's website - www.leahcarey.com Podcast website - www.goodgirlstalk.com WORK WITH LEAH: Individual and couples coaching - www.leahcarey.com/coaching EPISODE CREDITS: Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email) Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco Transcript creation – Jan Acielo Music – Nazar Rybak
This week, Chrissy, Donavon and Chaz talk about what Joshua Harris did after leaving his church. We also watch the documentary featuring him, I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye.
When Jessica Van Der Wyngaard created the film I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye, she had to face her own relationship with Christian celebrity culture. For the first time on our show, she talks about what it was like to make the film, a film people would largely credit to Josh Harris. And she takes us on a journey to rediscover what is worth fighting for in the Christian story. Show Notes Here Watch the episode on YouTube Here Don't forget to sign up for The Green Room by becoming a partner today! Jess will be doing an exclusive Q&A this week about her experience making the film, plus you'll get to connect with others who are thinking about purity culture and the way forward. August 26 (Thursday) at 9pm EST/ August 27 (Friday) 11am Melbourne time. Instagram Twitter
"If you can call people to a higher standard and tap into that fear, that ‘I'm not trying hard enough. I'm not really loving God enough. I'm not sacrificing enough,’ there is always going to be another person coming along with a book or a conference to sell that is going to tap into that and say, ‘You're right. You're not doing enough. Let me show you how you can do more.’” Joshua Harris is a storyteller and owner of the marketing company Clear and Loud. He is a former pastor and author of the now unpublished book "I Kissed Dating Goodbye." He told his story in the DOCSology film I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye. joshharris.com Twitter: @HarrisJosh
*Please note: We had some connection issues, so even after editing, there are several breaks in the audio, but I do not think it affects the convo much! Devi Abraham is a freelance writer, co-host of "Where Do We Go" podcast and mom of two living in Australia. Despite living so far away from me here in the United States, Australia is part of Western Christianity and she also grew up in a missionary family. Devi has a lot of fresh thoughts on things like politics, race and culture. Her podcast description is "untangling sexual ethics for a new generation of Christians," You can imagine how that caught my attention -- and I promptly binged several episodes! She and her co-host, Jessica Van Der Wyngaard (who created the documentary film "I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye" about and with infamous author Joshua Harris) talk about all things human sexuality and break down some of the things the Church or Christian culture may have done wrong in the past. She also writes about motherhood and is just a delight fo a person to speak with!
Here's a link to the documentary, "I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye." It's a fascinating film: raw, honest and authentic.Follow Josh on Instagram here.
Pastor Curtis Allen joined Covenant Life Church in Gaithersberg, Maryland as a young Black man and after he joined the majority white church, he discovered the dating culture to be...different. From the overuse of the "guard her heart" mantra to rooms divided in half with all men on one side and all women on the other side. It was a world saturated in the I Kissed Dating Goodbye courtship methodology. This conversation was recorded years before the murders of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, and George Floyd and the fresh wave of #blacklivesmatter protests we've seen around the world in the past weeks. But Pastor Curtis Allen's words to us about his experience as a Black man in a majority white church will give us all something to think about. From the ushers who wouldn't give him a program to the weight of having to assimilate, Pastor Allen speaks honestly words that all of us need to hear. This interview is a departure from our usual format. The audio you hear in this episode is Josh Harris interviewing Pastor Curtis Allen for the documentary I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye, a film made by our co-host Jessica Van Der Wyngaard. Full Show Notes Here Continue the conversation with us on Twitter & Instagram Get episodes of The Jess & Devi Show for $1 or $3USD/month
Ravi Zacharias died on May 19, 2020, and amidst the flood of social media posts saying #thankyouRavi by Christian celebrities like Tim Tebow and ministry leaders like Louie Giglio, there have been the quiet reminders of Zacharias' alleged harassment of a woman in Canada. This is a meaty episode - not for the theologically faint of heart - as Jess and Devi talk about the Myth of the Christian Hero. Why do we need these famous Christians to be "perfect"? What does it say about us that we even need heroes or a king figure to look up to? Jess also talks about working with Josh Harris while she was making the documentary I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye and the impact of Christian celebrity culture she witnessed around Harris. (Image of Ravi Zacharias is from Ravi Zacharias International Ministries media kit, image of Josh Harris is a screen grab from I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye) Full episode show notes here Join the conversation on Twitter & Instagram Get episodes of The Jess & Devi Show for $3/month
20 years ago Joshua Harris was the poster boy of the evangelical ‘purity movement’ having authored the bestselling book ‘I Kissed Dating Goodbye’. Today, Harris regrets writing the book, and has also recently changed his mind about Christianity. Justin is joined by Jessica van der Wyngaard, director of the documentary film ‘I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye’, and Christian apologist Sean McDowell, to discuss purity culture, singleness and the Joshua Harris story.For the documentary www.isurvivedikdg.comFor Sean McDowell www.seanmcdowell.org For Unbelievable? Live in LA on 11 & 12 Oct: www.unbelievable.live Get signed copies of Unbelievable? the book and audiobook: www.premierchristianradio.com/Shows/Saturday/Unbelievable/Unbelievable-the-BookFor more faith debates visit www.premierchristianradio.com/Shows/Saturday/UnbelievableJoin the conversation: Facebook and TwitterGet the MP3 Podcast of Unbelievable? Via RSS or Via Itunes
Episode 67: Something old: Josh's: Hoop Dreams (1994): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110057/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 Christian's: The Longest Day (1962): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056197/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 Skye's: Mister Roberts (1955) https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0048380/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 Something New: The Girl Who Wore Freedom: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7347258/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 Ken Burns Masterclass: https://www.masterclass.com/classes/ken-burns-teaches-documentary-filmmaking The Girl Who Wore Freedom on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thegirlwhoworefreedom/ Something Blew: Christian's: Hamilton (??!?!?) Josh's: I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye (2018): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9625234/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 Skye's: Shazam!: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0448115/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 Jason's: Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7131622/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 https://www.normandystories.com/
Lara and Mary Ashley lead a round-table discussion on the recent documentary "I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye," about Joshua Harris' attempts to learn about the damage that resulted from his famous book and make amends for it. You can view the film here: https://www.isurvivedikdg.com/
Kutter Callaway and Joshua Harris chat about Joshuah's now 20-year old book and Kutter's new book Breaking the Marriage Idol, and the new documentary "I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye"
Tyler and David discuss what they've been watching, including Clouds of Sils Maria, Little, Breakthrough, The Man Who Killed Don Quixote, Ali: Fear Eats the Soul, Wild Rose, Kalifornia, El Desencanto, I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye, All Is True, Dekalog I, Avengers: Endgame, A Separation and Knock Down the House.
My Summer Lair Host Sammy Younan interviews Joshua Harris whose 1997 book I Kissed Dating Goodbye generated enough friction that Joshua was prompted to make the documentary I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye. My Summer Lair Chapter #104: Did You Read I Kissed Dating Goodbye? Recorded: Tuesday February 26, 2019 at 12:30pm at WeWork on the phone
What do you do when you make a mistake that affects, perhaps, over a million people in their youth; an error that would cause many to regret their decisions more than 20 years later?The crew grabs some popcorn to watch and discuss Joshua Harris' documentary, I Survived “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”. The intrepid trio is ready to comment on the “Purity Culture”, those responsible for its proliferation, and its long-term ramifications. Along the way, our heroes offer insight on the cultivation of virtue and morality, and alternative means to correct our errors. Grab a snack and buckle in!We're offering Sex, Dating, and Relationships: A Fresh Approach by Hiestand and Thomas. Register for the opportunity to win a free copy. The book is a complimentary gift from our friends at Crossway.Congratulations to the winners of Authorized: The Use and Misuse of the King James Bible from our episode The King's False Friends. Thanks to Lexham Press and Jones Literary for the copies!Joe C. - North Richland Hills, TXVicki, W. - Harrisonburg, VA
Josh and I sat down to have a conversation about the documentary I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye and topics surrounding his journey reevaluating his book. Here are some of the things we discussed: The influence Adam and Eve after the Pill by Mary Eberstadt had on our journeys. The context of the world for sexual norms and Christian values, both when his book was written and now. I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Director Jessica, who was the driving force behind the project. Societal relationships between men and women and how/why Josh views women the way he does now. Suppression of reality and how that impacts sexuality and spirituality and the ability to deal with our own issues as a Church and community. The realities of how tribalism and fame influence public figures. Our plans for the future with projects and business. Links mentioned: Josh's website where you can see his statement about I Kissed Dating Goodbye: https://joshharris.com/ The free link to the documentary I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye: http://explorationfilms.com/survived/index2.php Josh's Instagram where you can keep up with some of what he is doing with his new business: https://www.instagram.com/harrisjosh/ His new business, Clear and Loud: https://joshharris.com/#clearandloud
“A Slice of Community”: This week, Candice discusses Joshua Harris’ new documentary “I Survived ‘I Kissed Dating Goodbye’”, John Gray’s Lamborghini purchase, her neighbor’s 3am house party, her viral pound cake and the lessons they all teach us about accountability and ethical formation.
What did the purity movement and books like "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" get RIGHT... and what did they get WRONG about "Christian" dating? After Rebie saw an early screeing of "I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye," a documentary by Joshua Harris (author of the book,) she was launched into processing WHY so many people walked away from that movement ashamed, hurt, and carrying negative views of sexuality and dating, while she walked away unscathed. Is Rebie the only one who managed to take something good from this movement? HOW did that happen? And regardless, what should "Christian" dating look like now? Rebie gets extra saucy. Candice processes her dating life. This is a unique one. haha "I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye" will be available to stream for free sometime in November 2018. Find out more on their website: isurvivedikdg.com
Touch Podcast Episode 13 is hosted by Ryan Clark and Nathan Novero. We’ll be “Kissing Something Goodbye” with Joshua Harris And Jesica Van Der WynGaard in this two-part series where we talk about the upcoming documentary titled, “I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye” that chronicles the journey of best-selling Christian author Josh Harris and his breakout book, “I Kissed Dating Goodbye,” where at age 20, he invited young people to stop dating, stop physical contact and court their future mate, even saving the first kiss for the wedding day. Aussie documentary filmmaker Jesica Van Der WynGaard talks about how she directs and produces a film where Josh reconsiders some of the things he wrote 20 years ago. Jesica talks about what its like to be a single 30-something Christian in light of the book’s expectations. Josh talks about going to seminary and being confronted about his book’s teachings by his new peers. The beautiful music on episode 13 was written, composed and produced by Carter Harrell, a Nashville artist. His track “Broken Love” can be heard in its entirety at the end of this episode.
In this episode, Rebecca interviews the director of I Survived I Kissed Dating Goodbye, Jessica Wyngaard. They chat about how Jessica met Joshua Harris, how she deal with her emotions towards his book, her upcoming documentary, and women's vocations. The documentary website: Isurvivedikdg.com Jessica's email: Jessica@Isurvivedikdg.com