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In this Fuck Yeah Friday episode, Lesley Logan makes the case for celebrating the small stuff instead of holding your wins hostage until everything feels perfect. She shares an honest rant about technology that overpromises, a candid retirement-planning win with Brad, and a listener who finished all ten Spring Training classes. She digs into why tiny, bite-sized celebrations are what actually turn good intentions into habits. It is a warm, grounded reminder that the thing you just did is already worth honoring. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How modern tech overpromises while quietly making life harder.What Lesley and Brad's real retirement plan looks like.The listener streak that shows why consistency wins.Where confidence support actually comes from, and why.Why holding your celebrations hostage backfires on you.Episode References/Links:634 ft Gregg Lunceford - https://beitpod.com/ep634481 ft Steve Selengut - https://beitpod.com/ep481352 ft Tess Waresmith - https://beitpod.com/ep352@lmarieinsta - https://www.instagram.com/lmarieinstaSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:48  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast. This is our Fuck Yeah Friday. This is where we share some wins, we get some mantras, we get to just be in each other's lives a little bit. I want to know what's going on with you. Send it to me, right? Send me in your wins, send me what you're working on. Send us the topics that you're wanting us to do solo episodes on, or get some interviews on. Also, I just want to say thank you to those of you who have bought flash cards or joined OPC recently, because your support of OPC is what powers this podcast. So, if you have not checked out what we have at OPC, we've got some really great work and get stuff for you, and so if you're Pi curious, Pilate's curious, we've got stuff for you, don't have to be a Pilates expert to join OPC, is for people who want access and accountability to their Pilates practice, and so big thank you, big shout out to all of you. Lesley Logan 1:33  Okay, maybe I should welcome OPC members who join, who are Be It Pod listeners, I don't know if I should do that, but maybe you should do that, maybe we should do a little shout out, so you can hear your name. It's fun to hear your name. It's fun to hear your name on a podcast, especially this one, because it's top 1% podcast, right? Okay, so my "I need a moment" is that I'm currently sitting on my phone because it won't stop dinging, even though it's on do not disturb, and my frustration and my rant is, okay, what? What is Do Not Disturb for if I get disturbed on it, and it's like, oh, well, if your favorite, so your favorite thing get through, because, of course, I want my husband to get through, but then it dings on him texting me, and it's like, well, why, why are you doing this? I do Do Not Disturb for a reason, so how do I get to totally turn off, but then you can't have it turned off, because what if someone has an emergency? Then Brad did something to his phone, so nothing gets through, which means literally there was one day when our websites went down, his sister and I are trying to call him, and I'm doing the double call, and all this stuff. We got to the point where I almost sent my father to the house to wake him up, because we're like, "We need to talk to you, and we couldn't get through. So I'm annoyed that Do Not Disturb work so badly that my husband has turned his phone to a place where we can't even call through, and it doesn't work at all for me, and that my phone is beeping, and I have to sit on it. Why do this podcast? Because in those last episodes, you probably heard it dinging, and I apologize for that. That's annoying. But, why? The thing about technology that pisses me off is, don't tell me it's great, and it's making my life easier when it's making my life shitty. You know what I mean? But then, if we don't have it, then it's like, well, that's gonna suck, right? That will totally suck.Lesley Logan 3:06  So, anyway, all right, now a win, because if you get to complain, you have to have a win, and when you're not, we talked about this last week, the win does not have to be in the same complaint, doesn't have to be from that, because that I don't want to talk, I want to be like, oh, so and so died, but the win in it is, that's terrible shit, that's not it at all. My win is Brad and I adulted, we talked with our wealth managers, and things are looking good, and that's, you know, that's nice, because it doesn't feel like the world is doing well, and I am an elder millennial, and I want to be an elder millennial who gets to retire like I am, I want to retire, not today, don't freak out, but I want to be someone who gets to retire, that feels like a great.. we don't.. we've had guests on this podcast who talk about having your retirement persona. Let me tell you what it is. It is owner of a compound with my Golden Girl lifestyle, and all of my DINCs, dual income, no children couples, each having their own motel room, and then we have this massive Pilates studio slash gym, massive restaurant-style kitchen that we all get to cook in, so no one has to cook in their place, and no one has to have all these different, they just have a, their motel room is like their their place of living, their personal space, but then we have all these communal spaces we can take care of each other, because who else is going to take care of us? So, my win is that we're at least investing in a way that I was going to allow us to retire someday, more money would be better, but we're doing pretty good, considering what's going on in the world today. So, that's a nice win. Lesley Logan 4:36  So, now let me pull my phone out, so I can read one of yours. This is @lmarieinsta. I did all 10 Spring Training classes, and joined OPC! That's insane. @lmarieinsta, way to go. 10 classes, huge. I watched the ones that I wasn't in because I had to do the thing, and if you did, those were hard. Way to go, way to do all 10, proud of you. See, you guys, that's a win, right? When you're like, I committed to something, and I'm going to do what I can, and then you celebrate that you did it. We've got to normalize celebrating that you did the thing you want to do. It doesn't mean that you did this, shouldn't make a massive project, like I'm into spring training, and I'm celebrating that I did the spring training. That's the thing, right? Some of you are holding yourself hostage on celebrations that you're like, "I don't get to celebrate that I signed up for this language class until I can speak fluently. No, you have to celebrate, you signed up for it, you have to celebrate that you went to it, to celebrate that you quizzed yourself on it, to celebrate that you study a little extra, you have to celebrate these things. That's what makes them habits. That's why we do this. It's why we celebrate. So you get a little dopamine high, and then it makes it easier to do more things for yourself. People are always seeking out confidence support. You want to know where confidence support comes from? From doing the thing that you said you would do, and that's why you got to make it small. You got to make it bite-sized. You got to make it things that you can do. Lesley Logan 5:54  So, your mantra: I am a reflection of love and kindness. I am a reflection of love and kindness, a reflection of love and kindness. Yes, you are. All right, Be It babe. Thanks so much for listening. I hope you are loving these Friday episodes. If you have any questions about OPC, what we do there, our flash cards, how to use them, you can go to onlinepilatesclasses.com or you can reach out to us. We'll be happy to answer them. We have phone numbers you can chat to. Okay, until next time, Be It Till You See It.Lesley Logan 6:24  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 7:06  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 7:11  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 7:16  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 7:23  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 7:26  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Dedicado à Yaakov Tzvi ben ChaninaPatrocine uma aula e ajude a levar a Torá mais longe: shiurpix@gmail.comMesmo nos dias mais sombrios de luto e restrições que antecedem Tisha B'Av, a Torá nos revela uma fonte inabalável de consolo e ação prática. Nesta aula, o Rabino Avraham Stiefelman traz o ensinamento reconfortante de que o estudo detalhado sobre a estrutura e a engenharia do Beit HaMikdash é considerado por Hashem como se estivéssemos reconstruindo o Templo sagrado ativamente. Conectando as Halachot deste período à alegre certeza da Geulah e ao despertar de nossa alma, o shiur nos guia através da visualização do Templo, das lições de nossos sábios e da força transgeneracional que mantém vivo o futuro de nosso povo.#Torá #BeitHaMikdash #Tshuvá #EstudoDeTorá #TishaBAv #Geulah #HistóriaJudaica #Halachá #RabinoAvrahamStiefelman

The Connection Between Shabbat and the Beit HaMikdash Welcome to Embrace Shabbat. It is Erev Shabbat Chazon—the Shabbat where we are meant to reflect on the Beit HaMikdash (Holy Temple) and its destruction. As we have mentioned in the past, the Gemara teaches: לא נחרבה ירושלים אלא בשביל שחללו את השבת "Jerusalem was destroyed only because of the desecration of Shabbat." There is a profound connection between the Beit HaMikdash and Chilul Shabbat (desecration of Shabbat). Conversely, there is an equally strong connection between honoring Shabbat and the ultimate rebuilding of the Beit HaMikdash. We see this clearly in Lecha Dodi , where we sing: מקדש מלך עיר מלוכה (Sanctuary of the King, royal city) קומי צאי מתוך ההפכה (Arise, leave from the midst of the upheaval) רב לך שבת בעמק הבכא (Too long have you dwelt in the valley of tears) In the very next stanza, we sing: Hit'orari, hit'orari, ki va orech ("Awake, awake, for your light has come"). In the middle of accepting Shabbat upon ourselves, we seemingly go off on a tangent about rebuilding the Beit HaMikdash. But it is not a tangent at all; accepting Shabbat is intrinsically linked to the rebuilding of the Temple. Parallels of Holiness On this Shabbat leading into Tisha B'Av, let us focus on these connections. Our Shabbat rituals directly mirror the service of the Beit HaMikdash: Shabbat Candles: Symbolize the Western Wall of the Menorah. Two Loaves (Challah): Mirror the Lechem HaPanim (Showbread). Kiddush Wine: Mirrors the Nisuch HaYayin (Wine Libations). Zemirot (Songs): Mirror the songs sung by the Levi'im. Washing in Warm Water: The custom to wash hands and feet before Shabbat corresponds to the Kohanim, who had to wash their hands and feet before serving. The Hierarchy of Kedusha (Holiness) The Beit HaMikdash is the place where the Shechinah (Divine Presence) rests, and Shabbat is the time where the Shechinah rests. In a way, Shabbat holds a unique level of holiness. Jewish tradition outlines three dimensions of Kedusha : Holy People ( Am Yisrael ) Holy Times ( Shabbat/Chagim ) Holy Places ( Beit HaMikdash ) We determine priority by what happens during a conflict. If Shabbat conflicts with saving a Jewish life, saving the life trumps Shabbat. If building the Beit HaMikdash conflicts with Shabbat, we pause the construction because Shabbat takes precedence. The human being is the greatest vessel for the Shechinah—a walking Sefer Torah. Next comes holy time, which is spiritual and non-physical ( Mekadesh Yisrael ve'hazmanim ). Finally, there are holy places and items. Every Shabbat, we step into a sanctuary of time. Just as entering the Beit HaMikdash gave a person a tangible feeling of the Divine, entering Shabbat is entering a holy zone. Great individuals throughout history could actually feel the Neshamah Yeteirah (additional soul) enter them without ever looking at a clock. Avoiding "False Testimony" in Retzei Generally, we do not speak directly about the destruction or the comfort of the Temple on Shabbat, except for the prayer of Retzei in Birkat Hamazon . However, the Pele Yoetz writes that one must be exceedingly careful during the Shabbat meals to remember the Churban (destruction). When we sit at our beautiful tables, we must ask: What about God's table? Note on the Nine Days: The reason we abstain from meat and wine during the Nine Days is not standard mourning (as regular mourners are permitted meat and wine). Rather, it is because God's table is empty of sacrifices and libations. (Some Sephardic customs extend this through the tenth of Av because the Temple continued to burn into that day). The Pele Yoetz warns us against offering "false testimony" ( me'id edut sheker be'atzmo ). In Retzei , we say: אף על פי שאכלנו ושתינו חורבן ביתך הגדול והקדוש לא שכחנו "Even though we have eaten and drunk, we have not forgotten the destruction of Your great and holy House." If we say these words without a single thought about the Beit HaMikdash, we are speaking falsely. The Three Elements of Greatness and Holiness To ensure our words are true, let us dedicate this Shabbat to saying Retzei with deeper kavanah (intention). Notice how the phrase Gadol v'Kadosh (Great and Holy) appears three times in our liturgy, representing the three dimensions of holiness: Holy Time: HaShabbat HaGadol VeHaKadosh hazeh (This great and holy Shabbat). Holy Place: Churban beitcha ha'gadol v'ha'kadosh (The destruction of Your great and holy House). Holy People: Shmecha ha'gadol v'ha'kadosh aleinu karata (Your great and holy Name You have called upon us). On Shabbat, we honor the holiness of time and people, but we bemoan the lack of the holy place, asking God: V'hareinu benechamas Tziyon ("And show us the consolation of Zion"). Turning Rest into Consolation The Tiferet Shlomo (on Parashat Noach) points out a beautiful linguistic connection. The word for rest, מנוחה ( Menucha ), contains the exact same letters as the word for comfort, נחמה ( Nechama ). Through the Menucha of Shabbat, we bring about the Nechama —the comfort of the rebuilt Beit HaMikdash. Why do we ask for the rebuilding of the Temple specifically during Retzei ? The Tiferet Shlomo explains that because we taste a microcosm of the Divine Presence on Shabbat, we are moved to say: "Hashem, we have tasted this lower level of Your rest; please grant us the ultimate, full-fledged rest of the Geulah (Redemption) and Olam HaBa (the World to Come)." As the sages promise: "He who mourns over Jerusalem will merit to see its comfort." Let us leverage this Shabbat Chazon to shift our focus, pray Retzei with true intention, and merit to see the Beit HaMikdash rebuilt.

In part one of this two-part safety series, Lesley Logan digs into why so many people tie their sense of safety to the money in their bank account. She traces where that wiring comes from, unpacks the difference between financial security and real emotional safety, and gets honest about the seasons every business and every life moves through. With warmth and a few hard-won stories, she offers a grounded way to feel steady. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The 1974 credit law that still shapes women today.Why one slow week can make you feel like sinking.Where real safety lives when the money disappears.How broken promises to yourself erode your confidence.Reframing a hard season as evidence of a new season.Episode References/Links:Ep 352 ft Tess Waresmith - https://beitpod.com/ep352Ep 649 ft Tess Waresmith - https://beitpod.com/ep649Ep 53 ft Launa Jae - https://beitpod.com/ep53The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks - https://a.co/d/0aNfSwP7Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  What we have to do is find a paradigm shift, and move away from I feel safe and my bank account is X, to I feel safe right now because I know how to navigate whatever comes. Lesley Logan 0:05  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained 1000s of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity, and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring bold, executable, intrinsic, and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it till you see it. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:44  All right, Be It Babe. Welcome back to our safety series. Welcome back. I hope you enjoyed a little discussion about money and certainty and security, and where it actually comes from, and what's going on, and all these different things. And I hope we can have a great conversation about it, so you can send in any aha moments, wonders, wins, to the Be It Pod at beitpod.com/questions. Also, DM us on Instagram and let us know what your takeaways are, or if you have more questions that you want us to do a third episode or fourth episode on this. Lesley Logan 1:31  Alright, so today we're going to talk about becoming your own safe harbor, and that's just because, again, we talked about how it's so easy for us to put safety and security in what our bank account says. And for good reason, we know money makes the world go round and you have to have it to pay your bills and to be in a safe place, and so yes to all those things, and also really understanding what is secure and safe to you, so that on those bad bank days you don't just throw everything out the window and go "I suck at all of this." And I think this podcast, a lot of things stem from confidence, either having it or not. And what is important is that I think it's really tricky how self-confidence actually works because it comes, as I mentioned last episode, from doing the things you said you would do. So, I think some people look at someone like me and they go, "She's so confident," and then you think, "Oh, she knows this is going to work out." And actually, what if confidence was not that everything will work out, but knowing you can handle it even if it doesn't? That is the type of confidence I want you to have, because that's where I think security and safety really come. And I will just say, I know we have a lot of listeners at all different ages, we have a lot of young listeners, and so you might be at a different point in your life where you haven't had a lot of bad days that you've survived yet, or maybe you've had, I definitely did, but there's still this feeling that when bad things happen, they're the worst things in your life. And I'm over 40, and I know a lot of listeners here are over 40, and we have survived a lot. We have survived 100% of our bad days, as I've said in the last episode. Some of you have survived divorces, a lot of you just survived grief, career pivots, parenting challenges, health changes, and so I actually wanted to say, because you've survived all those things, I don't think you have to go find more self-trust, more confidence. I think you can remember you had it, you have it. I think it's about going, "Oh my god, there she is, there it is. I put it in the back of the closet over there, I forgot." You know, and so I think my first homework assignment for you from this episode, to get a strategy around how amazing you are, to have certainty and the safety that you are amazing, is look back at your history, go down memory lane, get out the data if you own your own business and look at how much you have done, look at the adaptability that you have. We tend to look back and think of all the good stuff, and so then when bad stuff happens, we don't want to go back there because it hurts or it stings. But if we go, "Whoa, I survived that." You guys, like I've talked about on the pod a few times, I don't think you guys realize I truly did leave someone, became without an address, couch surfed, totaled my car, then found out the studio that I rented space where I made my income was closing. Oh my god, I should have felt the most unsafe in that moment.Lesley Logan 4:16  And I was like, "Oh no, I've been here before," because I had been homeless before, and what I actually just need to do is figure out where the studio is going to be, so then I can find the apartments, then I can get a car. That's all. I made a plan. So you got to go back and you got to look at the data of what you have survived, so you can see that you can do this, you can do anything, and also most of the bad things that happen are never as bad as the worst things we've had. But we conflate them, we catastrophize them, and so they all feel as the same bad, but they're not. So I hope that little trip down my memory lane helps you realize I'm not the only resilient one here on this podcast. You are, you have survived 100% of your bad days. And if you would just pat yourself on the back, that's why we do FYFs, celebrate the wins of what you survived, because you learn something from it every single time, right? You don't do things the same way. Lesley Logan 5:33  I also know that many of you listening to this podcast are do-it-all-yourself, and that feels safe to you, and I am that person. I'll just do it myself, and then it will get done the way I want, and then it'll be perfect, and I will have certainty and security and safety. But the reality is that we end up not trusting anybody when that happens. We think we have so much self-trust that we're the ones who can do it, and then we trust no one, and then we become actually more and more alone, and that is not necessarily what creates safety. That does not create long-lasting confidence, and I'm not saying that you have to have a business partner or a life partner, or anything, you can hire people, or you can ask for help, or, if you like a book, join a book club. There's just different things we can do so that we are not just doing everything all ourselves all of the time, because there's just too much in one life for anyone to do. Maybe you actually leverage AI to help you with the things you need to do. People are always better, but also, if you want to feel safe and secure, if you have these emotional up and down roller coasters where you just feel like you have certainty and uncertainty, chances are you might be trying to do it all yourself, and it's exhausting. You not only don't have anyone to trust in doing something, but then you start developing this inability to trust people. Lesley Logan 6:26  And then another thing that is affecting us, if we are hyper-independent type people, we're in that trap, is we actually can get into a place of, "What if I lose everything?" We start to panic, and then we go back to that catastrophizing situation, and we worry, and it actually doesn't prevent anything bad from happening, but it does ruin your present moment. I had an incredible interview with an astrologer, Aleks Ceho, and we actually talked about intuition and how you can have an intuitive thought and bad things could still happen, but that doesn't mean your intuition was wrong. It means you heard your intuition and it gave a warning. Does it mean that you should have heard it a split second sooner? No, you listened, right? So it's just really important that we don't allow the worry of what could happen keep us from what is happening and enjoying that, because if we don't enjoy it, we don't learn from it, and then we don't have the muscle we need for when the bad shit happens. All right, that's how it goes. Lesley Logan 7:27  So, we've had a couple of somatic experts on the podcast, Lauren Zoeller and Keri Ford, and if you are really into somatics, they are experts, you should go listen to their episodes. But I can tie it into Pilates, right? So, if you do Pilates correctly, you should not feel tension anywhere, because tension just creates rigidity. But you should feel connection, and connection to our muscles allows us to have flexibility and stability, right? So, our center creates some stability so that we can move our limbs, or our limbs help create stability so we can move our center. And so I think it's really important that safety is not the same as rigidity. In fact, a lot of us are thinking that tension and rigidity and these strict rules, "I'm going to do it all myself, no one can help me," it actually does quite the opposite. And what is rigid will eventually break, but what is connected can bend, right? Can flow and move with it. Lesley Logan 8:38  I definitely can think back to a few times where my trying to control everything and how it went out just caused not only more stress on me, but just more stress on the people of my team because I could not articulate what was needed, because I was in such a fear state that I was actually just talking about what could happen versus what I wanted to happen. And so I will just say, if you keep talking, if you hear yourself talking about what could happen, what could happen, you are not focused on doing the things for what you want to happen. And so then guess what happens: the thing that could happen, because that's where your focus was, right? We had Brad Bizjak on the podcast, I think he brought this up on a podcast, where the most car accidents are in the rural areas and they hit a light pole, but there's hundreds of feet between light poles. How is this happening? Because they're focused on not hitting the light pole. Right? I want us to get out of the hyper-independence trap and actually move into some rituals for finding safety, that safe harbor. If you listened to the habit series, you know I like little tiny habits. So I want you to create micro-promises. I love the messy action, you're not not taking that, but you're not going big and bold and seeing what sticks to the wall. You're actually going to want to be taking tiny little actions, messy, right? Like, "I'm gonna do this thing and see how it goes," but instead of making this big all-or-nothing thing that can feel scary, especially if you're listening and you're over 40. If you're in your 20s, you can go big and bold and have the most fun, you should. If you're over 40 and you're like, "That stuff kind of scares me when you say that, Lesley," I feel you. That messy action doesn't have to be like quit everything. You don't have to quit it all. You can take a little micro-promise, you can make one little tiny action step today and see what that unveils and reveals. In episode 305, he said you can't see the whole staircase, but you can see the first step and you take it. So, take the first step, the first little action that you can know. It shows the next one, and then you'll start to see that you have the security that you're looking for to take more action and really build that trust in yourself, especially if you don't have it right now. Especially if you're like, "I wish I had the self-trust that you have." Well, then you have to take baby actions, you know, not the biggest mess, the tiny one, tiny, tiny. Lesley Logan 11:07  You also have to make sure you're taking time to regulate your nervous system. Talked about this before, like oh my gosh, sometimes you feel stuck, but you just have a dysregulated nervous system. Well, sometimes you feel nervous, feels unsafe, but you have a nervous system that's picking up on something. And I said it in the last episode, but you have to actually have non-negotiable daily practices for yourself that allow you to feel safe and secure. And I wouldn't do fluffy shit, I wouldn't go, "I'm safe, I'm secure." No, what makes you feel that way?Lesley Logan 11:38  Does it make you feel safe to have a wonderful bedroom that has no phones in it, that has the right lights at night, that you shut the door? What makes you feel safe and secure? Does it make you feel safe and secure if you check the bank account every day or once a week? What are the things that you need to do so you can actually ground down, right? And if you need even more, then there's somatic work you can do. So there's logistical, like financial check-ins, lock the door, have a friend that knows where you're at at all times, and then there's the somatic one, which is like maybe doing some breathwork or Pilates every day, something that moves your body that takes the stress out of your brain and your body, and connects your mind and body back together. It's really easy to tell ourselves some funky stuff in our brains, right? Lesley Logan 12:23  So, what we have to do is ultimately find a paradigm shift and move away from I feel safe when my bank account is X to I feel safe right now because I know how to navigate whatever comes, right? We have to really understand that there are going to be things that happen, and maybe it's not a bank account that makes you feel unsafe, but maybe it's a phone ringing, or maybe it's someone asking for a meeting but not telling you what it's for. There are so many different things that can all of a sudden make us feel like our boat, which was in a safe harbor, is now in a storm all of a sudden. So we, one, have to know what those things are about ourselves. For one of you it could be a bank account, for another it's a boss, for another it's a mentor. There are these different things that could happen that really just immediately dysregulate us and make us feel unsafe. So, if you know yourself, then you can go, okay, so then, what are the things that I can look to to be my north star, to be my compass, to be my anchor? What are those things? Because what ultimately will happen when you have those touchpoints is that you actually will stop fearing uncertainty, and you will finally have freedom to do all of the things you want to do, whatever that is. Lesley Logan 13:40  Because the reality is that we have six needs as humans: we need certainty and we need uncertainty. And my ADHD people, you need uncertainty, you love a little bit of change. I'm ADHD, so I need certainty, and I don't like it, I want everything to be exactly the same, and I want it to be different all of the time. And so just so you know, this was a really hard, hard thing. I think I had to hit my rock bottoms a few times so that I could actually go, "Whoa, I have survived 100% of hard days." And if I want to move this company to where I want it to be, if I want to be as big as it can be, if I want to have the impact that I want to have, which is impacting tens of thousands of people who love Pilates, then I cannot feel unsafe when shit hits the fan. I cannot, because it will just ruin my dreams. I will not ever get there. I hope this helps. I really do. And one last thing that really helps me is like just sometimes when you say things out loud, even to yourself: I feel very unsafe right now. I feel very worried right now. I feel this. And then you go, why? And if you start talking to yourself about those things, you start to realize, oh wait, hold on, there's this thing over there, this thing over here.Lesley Logan 15:00  And if you, oh my god, send in wins and you hear them on Fridays with me on a shitty day, you might just hear about a win you had and go, "Oh wait a minute, this bad thing's happening, but I had that thing happen there, I forgot." So all of a sudden you go from feeling unsafe and uncertain to feeling very secure and having that self-trust reminder. I want to do that for you, so send in your wins to beitpod.com/questions if you have topics you would like these little episodes to go into, please ask. If you want to talk more about one of the things that I said in these two episodes. Ask so that I know, and I'll make another episode. We'll go deeper. These are for you. They're definitely not for me. I talk to myself all day, my loves. So I want these to be for you. I want these to change your life. I want these to support you in everything that you're doing, because you're doing everything well. You're doing a great job. You're doing better than you give yourself credit for, and the world needs you. You are the only person who can do what you do the way that you do it. All right, until next time. Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 15:54  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 16:36  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 16:41  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 16:46  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 16:53  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 16:56  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Learning weekly from Rav Tzaddock HaCohen in Pri Tzaddik on the Parsha - Shabbos Chazan is an aspect of Binah Liba - The Vision of the Navi Yeshiayah, bringing us all to Teshuva Bahava, which Hashem will then complete the 3rd Beit Mikdash!Cover

É possível sentir saudade de um lugar onde você nunca pisou? Há quase dois milênios choramos, relembramos e ansiamos pela reconstrução da Casa de D'us, mas será que entendemos o impacto real dessa ausência no nosso dia a dia? O Beit Hamikdash não era apenas uma construção de pedras; era a conexão direta com o Divino. Entenda qual é a falta que sentimos. bônus: Um resumão da Torá escrita inteira.

In part one of this two-part safety series, Lesley Logan digs into why so many people tie their sense of safety to the money in their bank account. She traces where that wiring comes from, unpacks the difference between financial security and real emotional safety, and gets honest about the seasons every business and every life moves through. With warmth and a few hard-won stories, she offers a grounded way to feel steady. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The 1974 credit law that still shapes women today.Why one slow week can make you feel like sinking.Where real safety lives when the money disappears.How broken promises to yourself erode your confidence.Reframing a hard season as evidence of a new season.Episode References/Links:Ep 352 ft Tess Waresmith - https://beitpod.com/ep352Ep 649 ft Tess Waresmith - https://beitpod.com/ep649Ep 53 ft Launa Jae - https://beitpod.com/ep53The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks - https://a.co/d/0aNfSwP7Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Emotional safety and security comes from boundaries. Sometimes we blame it on the money, but it's really the people we're letting in our brains, letting rent space there, letting treat us a different way. So, you have to have some non-negotiables. You have to have daily practices that keep you grounded. So, no matter when the numbers fluctuate, you do these things anyways. Lesley Logan 0:19  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity, and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring bold, executable, intrinsic, and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it till you see it. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 1:02  Hi, Be It babe. How are you? We're back with a solo series. This is going to be more of a safety series kind of a thing, but also talking about money and uncertainty. And I think I've had many of you in the DMs sharing how you're loving these solo episodes and sharing some of your wins and some of your questions and needs, and we thought that this would be a really fun series that we could probably build off of as time goes along. Where the series kind of starts is like, if you've ever looked at your bank account and then questioned your entire life, you're not alone, you're just not. The reality is that somehow we really conflated what is in our bank account with the certainty that we need in our life, and then we've equated uncertainty with feeling unsafe. This is not a money episode, although if you need to listen to some money episodes, our episodes with Tess Waresmith are amazing. But what I'm hoping that you get from today's episode and this two-part series is just that financial fluctuations are real, so you're not alone. It's totally normal to have that, and your financial fluctuations and personal safety are not always the same thing. They can be, and I understand, because not only have I been homeless, I have also seen what being unhoused over time can look like, and especially if you're a woman. So, I do understand that, but I do think it's important that we just have an honest conversation, maybe have a dialogue. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, because there's a lot of different reasons why financial security makes us feel secure when it's actually not. Lesley Logan 2:33  In fact, in doing research for this episode, I was kind of like, I want to chat a bit about the history, especially in the States, but I think in most of the world, right? If you were a woman, you had to marry well so that you would have a house and, in air quotes, "safety and security." But if we read stories, we watch things like Game of Thrones, all these different things, we see historically how they treated women, but yet somehow we were conditioned that, well, that is the safe thing to do, and that's the safe thing to be in. The reality is, because women didn't have access to bank accounts, it was literally the Equal Credit Opportunity Act of 1974, women needed a male co-signer for credit. And so the reality is, like most of us listening to this, our mothers didn't even have access to their own credit card with their own name on it until they were probably sometime during the marriage to our parents or someone, right? So very few women had access to bank accounts. I had an eLevate member here who was sharing how her mother could not get money out of the bank account that her husband had to fix something because he was out of town, and this is like in the '50s and '60s, but that's not that far away.Lesley Logan 3:46  These are in the lifetimes of the people who raised us, and so, because of that upbringing in their minds, we have this generational feeling in our bones that money equals security. And so a lot of us, for better or for worse, have taken jobs or not taken jobs based on the security the money will give us, but that doesn't always mean that we are safe, right? That does not mean that the people that have that are going to treat you well, does not mean that that is the safest place for your personality and what your needs are. But I just want you to know, like, if you have that feeling and you're wondering, why can't I just let this go? Because I know there's money there. I know that I'm okay. I know that I have savings. I know this is a bad week, and this has nothing to do with who I am as a person. If you know that in your heart and it's hard to get into your head, you are not alone. It is this historical thing that we all have, and it's been raised into us. Lesley Logan 4:40  I remember not thinking I wanted to date this one person, but all the women around me going, "Oh my god, he has a great job and a great car, he's got like a legitimate career path," because I was a retail girly, and so what kind of career path did I have? Right, that's what they're really saying, but I was too young to really get that. Another reason why we can have these feelings and conflate financial security with certainty and safety is like that idea of being a good girl, traditional conditioning, being polite, and don't talk about money. And so if we don't talk about money, then we don't know what other women are making in the same field, and so we don't know that in some areas we're being undercharged or underpaid. In fact, if you remember when the Sony emails were hacked, all these people were able to see how much the men were getting paid for less lines than the women were getting paid. What it really reveals is the men asked for money and women didn't, and the women weren't asking other people what they were getting paid, so they didn't know that there was more money to ask for. Because we have to be the good girl, and if we're asking, then there must be something nefarious about asking, and so we then are conditioned to be polite, right? Lesley Logan 5:46  And so, if we go against that conditioning, we become an entrepreneur, we work for ourselves, we can constantly feel like we are in friction with society, like, "Ooh, am I allowed to negotiate? Am I allowed to charge more than other people? Am I allowed to have these boundaries, or should I just be grateful that these clients will pay what I want?" So then they can say that they want to come at a different time, and all of that stuff goes through our heads, and so you're just not alone, right? So this brings us to the brain and the business and the worth, but I know not all of you are working for yourself, so I want to just honor that you might be an employee, and there is some security in that, right? Like, our financial institutions definitely believe that if you have a W-2, you are more safe to give a loan to than someone like me. And I get so frustrated, not because I'm jealous of you or anything like that, we all have our different things that are going to work best for us. So, there's nothing wrong with being an employee versus being an entrepreneur. You should do what is right for you, but it does make me laugh that the bank thinks that's more secure when I know I can bet on myself, and companies can let go of people at any time. So we fool ourselves into what is technically, in air quotes, "safe" versus what could be safe, and it might be safer to be in a job, so just know that I'm not saying that. But in life every single day, there are these little tricks we play to make us think, "Oh, I'm safe now that I have this, now I'm safe," right? And we're not really getting to the root of what is safety, what is it, right? Lesley Logan 7:10  So let's get into some brain, business, and worth stuff. Entrepreneurship, most people in our lives have told us how it is the most uncertain thing, and it is. I'm just going to tell you right now, absolutely everything is, none of us are actually psychic, unless you are, right? So, the reality is, it doesn't matter if you work for yourself or someone else, it is uncertain always what's going to happen tomorrow. We don't know. And so I wanted to say, being a small business owner is really hard. It's fucking hard to compete with companies that have way more money, and also in the way that the customers expect a small business to be, because these big businesses can have your stuff within four hours to your house, and I have to take four days, right? And I have to charge you for shipping, and they don't, and so it's really hard, right? And so you can feel like you're constantly two steps forward, seven steps back, three steps forward, two steps back. You're just like, oh my god, sometimes you feel like you're just treading water and going backwards.Lesley Logan 8:07  Revenues do fluctuate, like clients change and seasons shift, and the thing is, no matter what business you're in, people are always like, "What's the safest thing?" It's like, what are you talking about? Every single business has a season, we as humans have seasons, the earth, the universe has seasons. So, there are seasons for harvest, and there are seasons for planting, and there are seasons for rest, which means the money is not going to be the same all the time, right? And so, then, until you can get to a place where you can trust in yourself and the seasons, you end up in this nervous system trap where your brain reads the vibes of a slow financial month as just physical danger, right? And our brain is primed to prioritize survival, and that's not a good long-term strategy, because what ends up happening is you will constantly be doing these random things to get money versus taking time from a regulated nervous system space to make decisions on your business that will help with the long haul. I had a business coach who told me this. She said, "Your business should be boring. This is not a place where you get entertainment." And so getting to have a boring business is really great, but the boring business that I have means that I know that April is a terrible financial month for us when it comes to income, and so is July. They just suck, and if we don't have great months going into April, and then between April and July, we could be fucked, right? And so we can scramble, and we've had that happen, because there are years that are just, oh my god, thank god for this year, and there are years going, "Okay, am I going to keep doing this?" But what we have to make sure with our nervous systems is that we're never just going off of vibes, we do need to make sure we're going off the data. And if your bank account is saying zero, then we actually need to go into the data of what brought your bank account there to zero. Oh, you invested in yourself. Oh, you paid this thing out, but this is coming in next week. Sometimes we forget that we planned for it, right? So, scarcity versus fact is something else we need to just take a moment.Lesley Logan 10:13  That brings us to that. So, like, it's really easy to catastrophize a shitty situation and jump like, "Well, that's gonna make that bad, and then that's gonna go bad." We're not gonna have time for that. And I definitely do this. If you have read The Big Leap, you know that one of the best ways to get yourself out of your genius zone is to worry. And when you take the shitty issue that you have of, "Oh, my bank account isn't reading the way I want," and then you catastrophize it, not only do you create doom and gloom loop stories, it makes it really hard to look at the actual data. And the actual data might show, "Oh, all these bills got paid, I am debt-free in this area over here, and my paycheck comes in 48 hours." Okay, great, you are slaying, you are in fact the opposite of unsafe, you are so secure, right? But we can forget the things that we did, especially my ADHD, high-achieving, over-achieving, perfectionist people, it's really easy to forget the plan when we check something out and it just hits a little differently than we expected it to.Lesley Logan 11:18  And then we have to just also talk about, a lot of times as women, how we have been raised to feel worthy, as opposed to just knowing we are worthy, are very different things. You know, there is so much that we tie into our identity of like, are we a good sister, are we a good daughter, are we a good friend, are we helping the people in our house, all the unpaid caregiving labor that women do, especially the daughters listening. I do have an episode coming out with a statistician on good daughtering, but there's just so much unpaid labor. But then we wrap our identity on the revenue we create, but if most of our time is spent with unpaid things, then we think we're not worthy, but in fact we're the most worthy person that anyone in our life has. We are worth so much to them, but we don't feel that way, because we think our worth is tied into the revenue of what's in our bank account and not to what we bring to the table, which is probably just so much more.Lesley Logan 12:04  And by the way, the way that society is going right now, this is fucking awful, right? It's like every other day that I pull up my Instagram, and there's some guy who's shitting on some guy who should be shat on, to be honest, who's talking about like, you know, she needs to carry the bags and take care of all the things, and my work is having the response of bringing the money in. It's like that is not a team. I mean, yes, you've delegated tasks, but that's just not how it goes. And to be honest, I fear for that girl in that video that I saw. So he makes all the money, and then what? What do you get when he moves on to somebody else? There's no security in that, that's why it was so uncertain and so unsafe for women for so long, who could not get jobs, who could not have bank accounts, who could not have credit cards, who could not get their names on deeds, they were not safe at all, right? Because they couldn't leave their husband, because where were they going to go? How'd they get money? He could leave at any time, and they'd have nothing, right? And, by the way, he's not safe, a lot of people died mysteriously because divorce wasn't a possibility, right? So we have to remember, ladies, like we are so much more worthy than what we are being paid for because of the worth we bring to the people in our lives, what we do for them, right?Lesley Logan 13:36  So don't make your bank account a report card on your value, because that's not what it is. And you know, I feel this, 2023 was this weird year, because we had this server issue, a bot sent infinite traffic to one of our servers, and it overwhelmed our server, and then to get rid of the thing that that bot was attacking, it caused our website to run like it was 2005. And so we had to rebuild a 1,000-page website as quickly as possible, and it fucked with our SEO and all this stuff, and it cost so much money, because that was not what we were anticipating on spending money on. At the same time, we were trying to wrap up buying this house, so to make sure we had all this money in our bank, and it was just so stressful. We actually ended up having, and then we have to pay our taxes at the same time, because you pay your taxes so we could have the deed on the house, like all these different things were going on. And we had the money for the taxes, we were not expecting to build a website when we were planning for that, and so just all these things hit at once. And there was this one other unforeseeable bill that was not $100, it was like thousands of dollars. And it just in that moment when we're buying this house that I get to sit in and I love so much, I couldn't have felt more rich and poor at the same time. Like, I can afford this house, and yet every dime I have is gone to make all of this stuff keep going, and we did have to borrow and put a thing on it, and give it to pay our friends and family back, with interest. That's the right thing to do. And it can affect your self-worth. You can feel embarrassed about it, or you can go, "Wow, this is a fucking shitty time. I have a friend or family member who can help me. I'm going to do the right thing, and I'm going to be out of this," right? And so there's no reason to be embarrassed, and I'm still great friends with the people who helped me out through that time. That wasn't the first time in my life when I had to ask for help, and none of those things make my worth less, right? It just actually helped me through a tough time, and you would do that for someone else if you could, and there will be a time when you have to, right? Lesley Logan 15:44  So the other thing when it comes to security and safety, and when you wrap it up with your money, my neurodivergent listeners, hello, I see you. We already live in overwhelm. There's already so much going on in our brain. Our brain is three steps ahead all the time, and so when you have some financial uncertainty, not only is it easier to go into catastrophe situations, but you can go there much faster than anybody else. You can amplify the heck out of it, and you could add shame and panic to that quicker than anybody. And the reality is that you have to fall into the data over the vibes, you have to pull yourself back. "Hold on, let's back it up, back it up. What is real? What do I know? What about this makes me feel unsafe, but what's actually true? What's the actual reality?" Lesley Logan 16:38  And so, my perfectionists, that all-or-nothing mindset: "My business is failing." Just because you have a slow week. It's not failing. You're jt having a slow week. If you're in the first couple years of any project you're doing, you don't know the seasons yet, so it makes it really difficult. And if you are working for yourself or you're taking a hobby to be a side hustle, and you don't take the time to really get clear about your self-worth and what matters, and what is going to be something you can lean on for certainty in your business, and what will always be uncertain, and how you're going to handle getting the data so that you don't go off the vibes.Lesley Logan 17:15  If you don't do that stuff, you're just going to live in a constant state of emotional dysregulation and decision fatigue, and you're not going to actually be able to... you're not gonna have fun. I mean, I'm not saying that work is always fun, but it shouldn't make you feel like shit, right? Whether you're an employee for someone or you work for yourself, we have to figure out what are the actual things that I can say make me feel safe. How can I request those at my place of work or in my life if I work for myself? What numbers am I going to go off of so that I know what's going on, so that I have a bit more predictability, right? What will always be a little uncertain in this business? And where can I have certainty? Here's why I have certainty: I will show up every day and work hard. I'm so certain of that. I am so certain that I am very resourceful. If this shit hits the fan and spews it on the walls, I can find new ways of cleaning it up, even if every other tool is gone. Like, I am a resourceful person. I have certainty that the human that I am and the way that I put things out into the world, people will always want what I've got. Now, I have uncertainty in when they will want that. I have uncertainty in, if I put it out there, will people buy it? I have uncertainty of when people are gonna be ready for the thing I have to offer. All that's uncertain. I cannot predict when people are ready to buy. I can't choose the people who are ready to listen to this podcast, but I can predict that I will show up to work tomorrow, right? And so I think that's really important. Lesley Logan 18:47  So that leads us into rewiring our brains for safety and those harder seasons, like we need a little toolkit. There's a difference between emotional safety and financial safety, they are two different things. And so while money can create stability, your emotional safety actually comes from internal self-trust, community, and boundaries. And I want to just talk about internal self-trust. That would be confidence. That's where a lot of people struggle the most, because they actually consistently, on little bitty things, failed to do what they said they were going to do. And because of those little tiny things, "I'm going to go for a walk in the morning. Oh, I'm going to get up and read this book. I'm going to journal..." and you don't do it, you are just carving out at your confidence, your self-trust, right? So it is important if you want to feel safe that you ditch the all-or-nothing mindset and commit to doing things that make you feel good in your life, or that you can do that are at doable dosages, right? Not like, "I'm going to work out every day for an hour" no one can say and do that, there's so many days I want to work, right? Lesley Logan 20:03  So, also, emotional safety and security comes from boundaries. Sometimes we blame it on the money, but it's really the people we're letting in our brains, letting rent space there, letting treat us a different way. So, you have to have some non-negotiables, you have to have daily practices that keep you grounded, no matter when the numbers fluctuate, you do these things anyways. You guys, I have so much work on my plate, so many things that I am excited about and equally stressed about, and I do not start working on them any earlier than my day starts with work, because my non-negotiables have to happen so that I can do that with love, grace, energy, stamina, endurance, excitement.Lesley Logan 20:46  If I come out to those jobs out of fear, out of rush, out of like, "I gotta get this done," then, like, no. My daily practices that keep me grounded allow me to show up and have emotional security, so no matter what is going on with the finance of the businesses, I know that I can show up and move the needle forward in the direction it has to go. And then if you're like, "I have all those things, and I still see the bank account in a certain way," then we need a little bit of a gentle reframe, right? We need to say, "What if this season I'm in is not evidence of failure, but instead just evidence that I'm in a different season?" right? Like, this is just a different season. I'm out of the other season, I'm in the new season right now. What if we reframe how we feel about things, and go, "Okay, so I invested X, Y, and Z in this, and so because I made that investment..." as opposed to, "I spent, ...I made that investment, I now will have these things coming to me on these dates," and then tell them this is what I'm going to be doing, right? Like, we have to change how we talk about ourselves and talk to ourselves, and talk about what we're doing in a way that is not toxic and gaslighty, but actually a pick-me-up, actually makes you feel like things are possible. Because if you don't, you're never going to feel safe in anything you do, whether you work for yourself or other people. It's just not going to work. You're going to constantly feel like you're sabotaging yourself, right? There are seasons, there are ebbs and flows. It is a real thing. And so, if nothing changed in your life but what the money in the bank account is, then how would you be any less safe than you were the day before? Lesley Logan 22:26  So, if you take nothing else away from our conversation today, I just want you to remember that your financial anxiety is not personal failure. It's part of a historical echo and a biological response, and you are building a system to help yourself in this world that wasn't built for us to have those systems, right? It's only in our generation that women are allowed to do the things that they're able to do, and so it is hard, and it is exhausting, and it is uncertain, and you're doing it, you're doing all the things. And so there are going to be days that feel like shit, but it doesn't mean you are shit. There's gonna be days that feel like failure, but you are not a failure. There are gonna be days that feel like they suck, but you don't suck, right? So, you have to take some time to write down what are the things that I can bet on, that I have certainty around, that I have security around. And when you're feeling like, "My bank account has shifted, and I'm fucked," you can look at those things and go, "Do I have these things still? Oh, I do. Okay, great. So, my bank account sucks, but I have all the things that I need right now." Knowing why we feel this way and why these things happen, it's helpful. It's half the battle. Lesley Logan 23:40  So, I know most of us are over 40 here. I know we also have some young listeners, hello, babes, I'm happy you're here. And we don't just need mindset shifting, like, I hope that this got your mindset to shift, we are going to need a new framework for safety. We have spent decades thinking safety means controlling every variable and overfunctioning and building a fortress of hyper-independence. And I'm not going to take away your independence. I want all of you who want to just live your life of independence that way. But also, I want you to have wonderful, amazing relationships, and that means friends who lift you up. It doesn't have to be partners in life that support your amazing boundaries, that can help be that reminder that everything is okay when you forget. And what if true safety isn't about ensuring nothing ever goes wrong?Lesley Logan 24:24  I kind of really want to get us all to what if true safety is knowing that you are entirely capable of navigating it when it does, right? Like I said, I have certainty around, like, if shit hits the fan, I can be resourceful. I want that's the security I want for you. So, in our next episode, we are going to dive into part two of this conversation. We are shifting from the brain and the history to the somatic and the strategic, and so we're going to kind of just dismantle the trap of doing things all alone, even if you are all alone, so that you can feel like you are safe wherever your harbor is, even when your revenue is going to fluctuate. And I love this quote, and it comes, I've heard it many times, but I know we heard it on our podcast a few times, and one of them was Launa Jae, and it's, "You've survived 100% of your hardest days so far." You have. So we have to start trusting our track record. Until then, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 25:18  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 26:00  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 26:05  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 26:09  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi..Lesley Logan 26:17  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 26:20  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Lesley Logan's posters are showing up as knockoffs on Temu, and she has a few things to say about it. This Fuck Yeah Friday episode, she opens up about the frustrating side of building something people want to copy, then pivots to a hard-won win from a teacher training program she has been quietly building behind the scenes. It is the kind of week where she names what is frustrating and still finds the good happening alongside it. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Why complaining out loud does not cancel out a win.The frustrating reality of strangers profiting off your images.What six weeks inside a brand new program revealed.The mindset shift that lets you celebrate unfinished progress.Episode References/Links:OPC Membership - onlinepilatesclasses.comOPC Flashcards - https://opc.me/flashcardsNevada SPCA - https://nevadaspca.org/Uplift Waitlist - xxll.co/uw@home_grown_pilates - https://instagram.com/home_grown_pilatesSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday.Lesley Logan 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:48  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast, my loves. It is our Fuck Yeah Friday episode, and this is our short and quick... it's that coffee chat with... although you're not with me, but I hope we're feeling like we're on a coffee chat. I'm going to share something I want to rant about, but then a win of mine, and then a win of yours. And the thing is, in life, you're going to complain. In life, there's going to be things you want to vent about. It's not toxic positivity to also see a win, not a win in the issue. I think that's where the toxic positivity is. I'm not saying you find a win in the problem that you're having, I'm saying you find a win that's happening in your life as well, and that's healthy, right? That's really, really good stuff. So, if you want to share your wins and send those in, you can send it to thebeitpod.com/questions. Also, this is where you can send your topics in that you want to make sure that we're either interviewing a guest on, or that you want me to do solo episodes on. I hope you are liking the solo episodes. I would love to hear more than some reviews, and if you love our podcast, and you want to support it, one of the ways you can do that is actually by being an OPC member. onlinepilatesclasses.com is where we have real Pilates for real bodies, we just want to do Pilates workouts that work for you, and we're really proud of the work that we do over there. And when you buy any of our flashcards, did you know that we take a percentage of what you purchased, and we give it to the Nevada SPCA? And while I'm talking about that, I have a cute little foster down at my legs, her name is Darla, and she is just a freaking... she is so cute, she's a little cow, and I'm kind of obsessed with her already. Lesley Logan 2:15  So the rant has nothing to do with Darla. Here's our rant. One of my followers had sent, "Hey, did you know this person's using your images in a book?" and so we go on Amazon, we do a takedown, done. I rant about it. People go, "Oh, did you know that this person's using them in a manual?" Oh, and then someone else goes, "Oh, have you seen this book about you? Have you seen that you're in this book? Oh, I just found this book about you." AI books all ran about me. I probably ranted about this before last month, so I'm going to tell you the most recent thing that happened that is new, you guys: fucking Temu is selling my posters, and I'm really pissed off about it, because you can see my watermark on there. And also the review is about how shitty the quality of the pictures are. Yeah, because it's a knockoff, and so now you're making me look bad. So, those are not my posters, those are my posters on Temu, but I'm not getting the money. So, feel free to go over there until I get them taken down and talk about how shitty it is to steal from people. And so, then I told people, "Oh, go ahead and leave a review." And then guess what happened?Lesley Logan 3:15  Somebody left a shitty review on a fourth book that I didn't know about, that is me, so I'm just tired of people using my image, and I'm gonna rant about that once a month until we get these lawyers to do their work on it. So that's going on, that's that. So my win, my win is we are six weeks into me teaching a beta version of my teacher training program that I have been working on for new Pilates instructors and Pilates instructors who want to bridge. So if you've been wanting to learn Pilates and you've been looking for programs and you read my book or maybe didn't, but you're looking for something solid this fall, I'll be onboarding the educators for it, and next year they'll be able to start running their own programs. I'm not running them, I'm actually going to be guiding them on running them, because I run eLevate, which is my mentorship program for teachers, and I can't be everywhere, can't be everywhere at once, but I'm really proud of the work that I've done. So, the win is not that it's completed, because it's mostly completed. The win is that I started the beta program, we're six weeks in, and I'm fucking loving it. The group of people that are trusting me through this beta program, I'm so grateful for, ladies and gentlemen, you know who you are. It's really wonderful to get to teach them, but also really, really great to have them be part of how I curate this manual and this program, because they're all different types of learners, they're all in different experiences of life, and I'm really, really proud of the work that they're doing. I'm proud of the work that I've done, and if you are like, "Oh my god, I'm jonesing to do this program," we are creating a waitlist for people that I can send off to the educators, and also announce when there are educators. So if you are wanting to know when Uplift is available to explore an educator near you, I want you to go to xxll.co/uw. That's going to take you to a waitlist for people who want to learn and study the Uplift program, and so that's that. For the people who want to be educators, you have to be part of my eLevate Alumni group to be an educator. So, more on that later. That's not the win. This is not an ad, but I am just so freaking proud of the work that I've done, and the team has done, and that these people have done. So, I know two weeks in a row, the wins seem really, really big, but a couple months ago, I told you that I'm working on this thing behind the scenes, and I'm almost done. This is the thing, so you know, I've had little wins on this along the way. This is a bigger win of it, but there'll be more wins to come, because until it's complete and going, there's more wins to have. Lesley Logan 5:44  Okay, one of your wins. Are we ready for it? This is from @home_grown_pilates, "I finally have the freedom and means to travel." Ah, what a win! What a win! I love that. You know what, that's a huge one. Jeez, but also just that you're celebrating that you have it, so many people would wait till they do travel, and that you are celebrating that you have just the ability to do it. Ah, that's what these wins are all about. That's what FYF is all about. So, thank you, @home_grown_pilates,, for sharing that, so you can inspire other people. Lesley Logan 6:20  All right, let me get to your mantra. Every day I grow in self-acceptance. Every day I grow in self-acceptance. Every day I grow in self-acceptance. Yes, you do. You're doing it. You're doing it, and you're being it till you see it. So until next time, take care of yourself, please. If you can't support OPC by being a member, which means you're supporting yourself, then definitely share this podcast episode or one of our interviews that you love with a friend who's a hero, and if you don't have a friend, then you can leave a review. Those are all very helpful things. So, thank you so much, my loves. Talk to you soon.Lesley Logan 6:53  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 7:35  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 7:40  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co. Brad Crowell 7:44  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan 7:51  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 7:55  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time. Lesley Logan 8:09  It's okay, you can sleep. I didn't mean, I didn't need to wake you. You're good. Oh my gosh, you guys on the pod team. I am fostering a dog, and she.. I clapped, and she was so sleepy, and now she's like, what? What does that sound? Here we go.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell recap the conversation with Julian Barnes, co-founder and CEO of the BFS Network and a leading voice on boutique fitness market data. They unpack what his numbers-first view of the Pilates business reveals about pricing, client commitment, and the confidence it takes to run a profitable studio. With twenty plus years guiding studio founders, Julian brings hard data to the soft topics most owners avoid. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:What it really means to sell the transformation not the process.How to help clients see the cost as an investment.Where courage and conviction change who becomes your client.Signs the Pilates bubble is bursting and what survives it.Stepping into your authority so clients commit and get results.Episode References/Links:OPC Membership - opc.me/beiteLevate Waitlist - xxll.co/waiitlisteLevate Replays - lesleylogan.co/elevateOPC Summer Tour (Powered by Balanced Body) - https://opc.me.tourOPC Flashcards - https://opc.me/flashcardsOPC Pilates Posters - https://opc.me/postersEp. 697 ft. Adrian Starks - https://beitpod.com/ep697Ep. 698 Adrian Stark Recap - https://beitpod.com/ep698Ep. 53 ft. Launa Jae - https://beitpod.com/ep53If I Die by Christopher S Lombardi - https://a.co/d/0eorMLTNFree Will - https://www.freewill.comBIPOC Resources - https://mhanational.org/bipoc-mental-healthSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  You have to understand that if people are making decisions based on cost, they will always do that. You have to bring it back to the investment of the transformation they want to have, and how badly do they want to have that. Lesley Logan 0:13  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:55  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap on my coast in life. Brad and I are going to dig into the enlightening convo I had with Julian Barnes in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, this will make a lot of no sense, because it was a different type of interview. It wasn't really an interview of what Julian does, it wasn't really a Be It Till You See It, it was very much a "let's talk about the Pilates industry." Brad Crowell 1:17  Yeah, it was an industry debrief. Lesley Logan 1:18  An industry debrief, and so. Brad Crowell 1:20  It was kind of cool, actually.Lesley Logan 1:22  Yeah, and I also, coming off of the recap of Adrian Starks, it made me even more aware of our purpose when it comes to Pilates business coaching. Because I don't know if Julian asked me this when we were on camera or off, but he was like, "You like helping these small studios?" And I was like, "Because that's what accessibility is." There's got to be different types of Pilates studios, because people need different things, and everyone shouldn't be in a 14-person class.Brad Crowell 1:48  Yeah.Lesley Logan 1:49  So, anyways, it's a really... if you are a Pilates instructor, or you have one, then they need to listen to both these episodes. After you listen to the amazing announcement of today, the holiday and the charity, and the other things, if you want to go off to an FYF or something else, I won't be offended. If you like the sound of this voice and you want to keep supporting it, and Brad, just the voice.Brad Crowell 2:12  Just the voice.Lesley Logan 2:13  You should be an OPC member. OPC is not for people who are obsessed with Pilates, I mean, it is, but it's really for people who just want easy access to real Pilates, and then a safe place to be imperfect, and to be themselves, and to be supported, and to be like, "It's okay if you missed a week, you're welcome back. We're all here for you." And if so, "Oh, you recover from injury. Oh, I had that one. Here are these things." It's where you get community support, and you're not alone. So, go to opc.me/40Brad Crowell 2:39  Yeah, actually, we got a new link for you. It's opc.me/beitLesley Logan 2:43  opc.me/beitBrad Crowell 2:45  B-E-I-TLesley Logan 2:47  B-E-I-T. I'm still waiting for my "just be it" things, given that everyone can distill people's shit around here. Why can't I just have "just be it"?Brad Crowell 2:59  I love that.Lesley Logan 3:01  It's okay, but we have "be it," and you can be it too, and you can be an OPC member while you're being it. I promise, I promise it helps. Today is July 9, 2026, and it's International Emergency Kit Day.Brad Crowell 3:13  That's right. It's Emergency Kit Day, y'all. This is a Boy Scout talking to you right now.Lesley Logan 3:18  Today is a day to raise awareness about being prepared when disaster strikes. An emergency kit, sometimes called a go-bag or disaster bag, is a portable kit that has essentials you and your family need to survive in case of emergency. They are easy to grab when you need to evacuate for whatever reason, usually a natural disaster. This day is a reminder to check your kit or build one today. It will make all the difference when an emergency happens. We have first aid kits, but that's what I thought this was, and it's clearly a go-bag, which we do not have, Brad.Brad Crowell 3:44  Yeah, we don't have. I don't have the movie duffel bag that's like, "Go, go, go," and you grab it on the way out the door, or the baby bag when someone is pregnant and has to run to the hospital, they got a bag ready. We probably could put one of those together. I think that would be wise. Don't let someone sell you a $300 go-bag. Put it together yourself.Lesley Logan 4:07  Just put it together. Just please put it together yourself. Photocopies of things are really great. If you learn anything from the fires of LA, it means you need to have copies of very important documents: birth certificates, passports, but also insurance policies, wills, whatever that is.Brad Crowell 4:24  I should digitize those and just put them.Lesley Logan 4:25  Can we have a digitized go-bag, Brad? Because I gotta be honest, we're gonna have to then remember where it is. Because I thought there's an emergency kit thing, and it was so funny, because you were asked if you had one recently by someone, and you're like, "Oh yeah," and I'm like, "Thank God they asked you, because if they had asked me, I'd be like, 'We don't have one.'"Brad Crowell 4:47  But not only that, if you have an emergency kit, go through it, because when was the last time you had it, or opened it, or used it? I went through ours, I don't know, six or 12 months ago, and I pulled everything out, and all the Band-Aids, the stickiness of the Band-Aids was just gone.Lesley Logan 5:03  Not sticky.Brad Crowell 5:04  Yeah, so I was like, "Oh wow, yeah, all this expired in 2005." So I got rid of all that and replaced everything. And then sure enough, somebody asked us, "Hey, do you have an emergency kit?" And I was like, "Yes," and I can stand by that everything is ready for you here. Yeah.Lesley Logan 5:23  And it's really funny because we actually have a really massive emergency kit in the bathroom by our studio in the house, and I was looking for Band-Aids in the bathroom that I get ready in every day. And then I was cleaning things up and getting ready for people to show up, and there's this massive Brad kit, and I was like, "Oh, we have a massive emergency kit," and I opened it up. No Band-Aids. Zero Band-Aids. That has not been updated. I'm like, clearly this is not a real studio, because. So go check your emergency kits, go create a digitized go-bag, because. Brad Crowell 5:56  We want a digitized go-bag, and then maybe a real one that's like, if you got to run out the door and you need a change of clothes or some shoes or something. This is notLesley Logan 6:02  This is not what the holiday is, what the holiday is, but there's that If I Die book. Have you seen this? I got asked for it on my Instagram. It's called If I Die or When I Die, and it's all these important things, and we should really fill that out.Brad Crowell 6:16  Everything You Need to Know Journal. If I Die.Lesley Logan 6:20  Brad's gonna find a digital one.Brad Crowell 6:21  I found it already. Yeah, well, this is a book, actually, by Christopher Lombardi. Collect all the information your loved ones will need to know at a difficult time. And he said, "When my father passed away, I wish I had such a book."Lesley Logan 6:35  Yeah, well, that's interesting. It's a little too much adulting for me in one day, but I like the idea of it.Brad Crowell 6:40  Yeah, there's also When I Die planners with pockets.Lesley Logan 6:44  Pocket.Brad Crowell 6:44  Yeah, that has little pockets in it.Lesley Logan 6:46  Oh, for things like my card, I have a card in Brad's office attached to the refrigerator from when my dad dies, a number to call for them to cremate him.Brad Crowell 6:54  Yeah.Lesley Logan 6:54  I know where the card is.Brad Crowell 6:56  I mean, there's even Reddit arguments about this: I made an "If I die" packet for my husband. My family is now calling me morbid for this effort. I think it's smart.Lesley Logan 7:05  It's incredibly smart, and it's not morbid. And you are gonna be... here's the thing, we talked about grief two weeks ago, had nothing to do with people, but we're just gonna bring it back up, when someone is dealing with the loss of a loved one, the last thing you need to figure out is the fucking password to your shit.Brad Crowell 7:22  Yeah.Lesley Logan 7:23  Don't do that to people. I'm watching The Pit, and that is a trap. You don't want to be dealing with that, plus what is their insurance? All that stuff. No, no, don't do that to people. And as I say this, Brad and I are hypocrites, because we have yet to sit down and do our fucking thing that his parents asked us to do three times, which is the DNR and the will thing, and all that stuff. So.Brad Crowell 7:48  There's a, we talked about this before, there's an organization called Free Will. Make your free will online.Lesley Logan 7:54  Okay, well. Brad Crowell 7:57  freewill.comLesley Logan 7:57  Well, this day just turned into a very helpful day, and my ADHD is really overwhelmed. Upcoming travel and events, you guys, eLevate 2027 is full, sold out, can't take another body, but you can join us today.Brad Crowell 8:13  You can join us today.Lesley Logan 8:17  At 1pm Pacific time.Brad Crowell 8:19  Is that 1pm? Lesley Logan 8:20  Yeah. Brad Crowell 8:20  I'm glad you know that.Lesley Logan 8:21  It's at 1 p.m. to learn about 2028 Elevate, and if you're like, "Well, Lesley, thanks, I'm going back to this on a different date," there's probably a replay up.Brad Crowell 8:31  Yeah, there'll be a replay. We'll put the replay up on the Elevate page, I'm sure.Lesley Logan 8:35  Go to xxll.co/waitlist, and if you missed it. Brad Crowell 8:40  Then go to lesleylogan.co/elevate and that's where the replay will be.Lesley Logan 8:45  Yeah, summer tour is really close, a few weeks away.Brad Crowell 8:49  OPC Summer TourLesley Logan 8:50  Yeah. Brad Crowell 8:50  Come join us in real life, I'm very excited.Lesley Logan 8:52  How many cities are we going to?Brad Crowell 8:53  13 or 14Lesley Logan 8:54  It's the reason we're recording prior to the announcement, so we don't know, but what I can say is it's probably mostly sold out, so you want to go to OPC. I can confidently say that.Brad Crowell 9:04  Yeah, I mean, we're getting close to.Lesley Logan 9:07  Well, because these are not conventions, these are literal pop-ups. These are small studios, we're talking small classes and workshops, and we do that so instead of having 50 people in a workshop, there's 25 and you can actually get to talk to me, and we get to take pictures, and we get to nerd out on Pilates. And the workshops are only 90 minutes. You don't have to take a whole day off, you can just take a part of a day off, and you get to be with other people. And Balanced Body is sponsoring our tour again, and so we'll have the Contrology equipment with us, plus some really fun prizes. So, opc.me/tour.Brad Crowell 9:41  opc.me/tour come join us.Lesley Logan 9:43  If you're new here.Brad Crowell 9:45  If you're new here.Lesley Logan 9:46  I make flashcards with Pilates exercises, and they have QR codes that take you to videos, and they have the setup and action on the back, and they have really cool tips that I gave you that are my words based on these things. If you like the way that I talk about Pilates, they're right there. And they've been edited by a contemporary trained teacher with contemporary women, and they've been edited by someone who's never done any of the stuff before. Shout out to the spine corrector, because after that, she wanted to buy one. So that's how good that deck is. So, go to opc.me/flashcards.Brad Crowell 10:12  Yeah, opc.me/flashcardsLesley Logan 10:15  And if you have the flashcards, do you know that we have posters, and you can get our posters at opc.me/posters? And you want to know something fun about the posters: we make no money on them. However, the shipping, because they're printed on demand, the shipping is cheaper because it's usually shipping to near you versus the flashcards, which come from us. By the way, my Aussies and my Canadians, we have distributors on the flashcards, so just reach out to us if shipping shocked the hell out of you. We have distributors in Australia and Canada.Brad Crowell 10:44  Yeah, awesome. Well, we used to do a question answer session here, but we're going to skip that. We've moved all the live Q&As over to YouTube for Sunday morning at 9 a.m. Pacific, and we shifted our focus here because we really like celebrating good works that other people are doing, and sharing about it with you all. Lesley Logan 11:06  Being more aware about things, just the different things that exist out there, and the different ways we can support things that might be of interest. And so July is actually an awareness month of a lot of awarenesses. So when I looked up July month.Brad Crowell 11:22  It's a month of awarenesses.Lesley Logan 11:23  Yeah, one of the things that July is an awareness month about is the ADA laws, and it's like a Disability Pride Awareness Month. It's also an awareness month of mental health awareness for minority communities.Brad Crowell 11:36  ADA for non-Americans, it's the Americans with Disabilities Act, ADA. So, yeah, and that was a big fight that started in California many years back.Lesley Logan 11:45  Yes, I learned a lot about it. It's very impressive. Yeah, and so anyways, I wanted to highlight the mental health awareness for minority communities on today's episode, because last time we did a recap, we actually did talk about mental health, and I just thought it would be a perfect time to bring that up. This charity is Mental Health America, and they actually have a lot of information and support for BIPOC mental health specifically. And if you go to mhanational.org, they actually have a whole section, because they do have a lot of support for the BIPOC community. Culture, ethnicity, and race all play a large role in the way that each person experiences the world and the types of mental health support that they may need. MHA's online BIPOC Mental Health Resource Center offers a wealth of information and tools to bring light to the unique experiences of Black, Indigenous, and people of color communities and empower and uplift BIPOC individuals on their mental health journeys. And I just thought that this is a really cool resource in case you need it, or there's someone that you know who needs it. Because the reality is, is that if you have had a different experience in this world, having a therapist or someone who can understand that is important, and it's key. And I just think that, how cool that there are people who are making sure that resource is easy to find. They'll have blog posts, but they actually have a whole resource page where you can find someone and find some help near you, especially with the shit going on in the world right now. Specifically in the US, I know we have a lot of international listeners, but they just fucked with the Voting Rights Act one more time.Brad Crowell 13:15  Yeah.Lesley Logan 13:16  And we are back to Jim Crow era shit, and it sucks, because the answer to all this is that we all have to vote in November in a way that tells them to fuck off, but also, people of color have been trying to do that for a really long time. You and I were listening to what's his name, that amazing senator from Georgia, who's a reverend, and he's like, "I lived my whole life under that act, and now my children have to fight..."Brad Crowell 13:44  Raphael WarnockLesley Logan 13:45  Raphael Warnock. "My children have to fight for their rights," and I just...Brad Crowell 13:50  Yeah, I mean, it's.Lesley Logan 13:51  Top of life.Brad Crowell 13:52  It's fascinating to hear him talk about that, where he's like, you know, I don't know how old he is, but he's an adult, he's a senator, he's been a pastor for a long time. He has two kids who are younger than 10 years old, and he said, "For me, because of the changes that happened in the '60s, I actually grew up in a more equitable time that allowed me to become a senator as a person of color," and he said, "Unfortunately, my kids are not going to have that."Lesley Logan 14:23  And what they're doing in Tennessee, where they just literally got rid of the one Black Congress person, just terrible stuff. And that's all just... even if you're like, "Well, that's politics," well, politics affects life, and on top of that, if your job and all these different things just becomes really heavy, we need to make mental health support seem like the same thing as you're gonna go get new toothpaste, or you get your things done, like you go to the dentist for cleaning twice a year, we go three. Mental health support needs to be as routine and normal as all of that, and also if you're BIPOC community, I think it's important that you have people who understand what you're going through, because it is different.Brad Crowell 15:05  Yeah.Lesley Logan 15:05  And you're not alone. So, hopefully, mhanational.org resource helps you. If not, and there are other ones out there that you want us to highlight, please send it in. We would love to do that. We'd love to use the platform to do that to help people who need that.Brad Crowell 15:19  Yeah, so leave us a voicemail, 310-905-5534, or you can also share your wins for our Friday pod at beitpod.com/questions. Brad Crowell 15:31  Let's talk about Julian Barnes. Julian is the co-founder and CEO of the BFS Network, the company behind the most comprehensive market research in the boutique fitness industry. He spent 20-plus years helping fitness and wellness businesses build the structure and strategy they need to grow, and he works directly with CEOs and founders of multi-location studios across the country. He brings a data-driven, numbers-first perspective to the work of building a profitable studio.Lesley Logan 15:59  Yeah.Brad Crowell 16:00  And it's really interesting too, because I mean, his background is law, and then he... I don't remember exactly how he got into fitness, but. Lesley Logan 16:07  He told the whole story. It's very weird how he got into it, but. Brad Crowell 16:10  He told us his story, but it wasn't, it was when we were.. we were talking about.Lesley Logan 16:15  Oh, sorry guys, it was definitely at dinner, but it was like, "Oh, he was helping this out, then he did this thing, there was his trainer." It's really kind of cool. Too bad that that's not on the pod, because it doesn't matter, because that was not what he wanted to talk about. But it really went along with Adrian Starks's finding your purpose kind of a thing. So, at any rate, just know that Julian is the evidence of doing that. If you listened two weeks ago, you know, it's interesting, because a lot of people think that studios are only studios if they have multiple teachers and group classes and things like that, and I think.Brad Crowell 16:47  Maybe the word "legitimate studio," right? Because they are still obviously a studio, a real studio, or whatever.Lesley Logan 16:55  But you and I see a studio as anything where a teacher is teaching in, and that studio could be a one-person show.Brad Crowell 17:03  Yeah.Lesley Logan 17:04  And that person can teach small groups and groups and things like that. And so it was interesting to hear the different ways that, in air quotes, legitimate studios are doing things, the numbers they have. But on the non-data side, one of the things I love that he said was there's no transformation without the transaction, and this is really important, because for any business owner who is listening to this, people don't buy your process. I'll just be really honest with you, please don't tell them your process, no one cares. But they cannot get the transformation they want to have, the goal they want to achieve, without paying you the investment of what that is, that's just part of the deal. If they want to have better posture.Brad Crowell 17:45  There's no transformation without the transaction, yes, but let's, before we go further on that, can we take a step back? What do you mean specifically? What's an example of "don't sell the process"? Because how are people actually making a mistake with that? Lesley Logan 18:02  What does thatlook like? They're saying, "We have classes on three days a week at 10 a.m. and your package of six sessions allows you to come two times a week." That's selling the process, right? "You come three days a week at 10 a.m." or "Mat classes are at 6 o'clock" or "At our studio, we have mat, semi-private, and private sessions on the Cadillac Tower." All of that's process. It's overwhelming information. It's words that they don't want to hear.Brad Crowell 18:30  It doesn't even mean anything to them.Lesley Logan 18:31  Even if they know what most of that stuff is. That's not what they actually care about. They care that you understand the problem that they have and where they want to grow, and that you are excited and a trustworthy person for that, and I think where a lot of people. Brad Crowell 18:50  And that's what they will pay for.Lesley Logan 18:51  Yeah, as well. Yoga Works doesn't exist anymore, it's a perfect example. Their entire advertising model was "first two weeks free, your first two weeks are free." That's a process, right? They were not selling "get meditated in 14 days or less" or "de-stress from traffic," right? They weren't selling what you were gonna gain from doing the yoga for two weeks, whereas if they had actually talked more about how you would feel when you left the yoga class.Brad Crowell 19:29  Sure.Lesley Logan 19:30  I think more people would take them up on that for two weeks free, because it's like, "Wow, two weeks free, this class must be full." No, they weren't, and they're not in business. But I see this all the time in people posting about their Pilates stuff: "Hey, I've got, I'm opening up two spots on Mondays and Wednesdays." Unless someone already trusts you, that's unhelpful. Launa Jae, who's been on our show, has done this really well: "Hey, I'm opening in two weeks, I'm moving four spots for women over 40 who are tired of yo-yo dieting, and they want to actually make a change that lasts a lifetime."Brad Crowell 20:03  Right.Lesley Logan 20:03  You can hear the difference, right? "I'm accepting four new clients," or "In two weeks I will have four spots available for this type of person."Brad Crowell 20:11  Yeah.Lesley Logan 20:12  That is listing the transformation someone's gonna have. She doesn't say, "And when you sign up, you'll have to do eight weeks of macro counting." No, she's not saying that, because no one wants to do that. That's too much information. Yeah, and then we get this a lot, because people will say, "Pilates is too expensive." People have been saying Pilates is too expensive since it was fucking cheap. People have been saying Pilates is too expensive since I started teaching, and people weren't even charging $1 a minute, right, for a private session. But you have to understand that if people are making decisions based on cost, they will always do that. You have to bring it back to the investment of the transformation they want to have, and how badly do they want to have that? Brad Crowell 20:51  Yeah, that's the shift.Lesley Logan 20:52  Some people don't actually want to pay the investment that the transformation would cost, so those people will always be looking for a deal, constantly frustrated. They're the ones who are buying this silly tool this week, and the next thing over here, they're bouncing around. But there are people when, if you reframe it to the investment for what you want to achieve, as Julian said, the investment you want to achieve for your desired goal is going to be one of time and money, right? So you change the word to investment, and then in doing that, you're going to shift the mindset from cost to investment, right? Which is a really good shift you want to make in someone's brain, because they invest in things all day long. They invest time in scrolling on their Instagram, they invest time in being in traffic, they invest time on a lot of different things. So, how can we shift the investment of time and money to something that actually works for them? When I was teaching mat classes only, and I was trying to get people in them, I would say, "Stop spending time in traffic, spend that hour in Pilates and get home in 20 minutes after,"Brad Crowell 21:54  Right.Lesley Logan 21:54  So I had people literally come to my mat class two nights a week that I had it, and they loved it, because instead of sitting in traffic for 90 minutes, they did an hour of Pilates, and then it takes them 25 minutes to get home, same amount of time, but they actually got a transformation to go with it. So really shifting that mindset. And then when people do ask for discounts, you have to have some confidence in the product that you have. I keep telling our agency members, "You need to have courage and conviction in what you do," and that also means telling people how they have to be to be a client of yours. My trainer has so much courage and conviction, she is like, "You cannot be a client of mine if you can't commit to this many times." Yeah, and I really do think that if a lot more Pilates instructors said that, yes, they might have fewer clients in the beginning, but I actually think they would have more later, because the transformation of their clients that they're getting would get them more clients.Brad Crowell 22:44  Yeah, I think this is a perfect transition into what I was hoping to talk about, which is... there was a moment where he was talking about Steve Jobs and the iPhone, right? And he's like, he wasn't like, "Hey, do you think it'd be cool if maybe you guys might want..." none of that. It was like, "Hey, check out this amazing tool that we built that's gonna change your lifeLesley Logan 23:07  Yeah.Brad Crowell 23:07  radically," right? And he said, so he was talking about confidence, right? And there's a difference between polling your audience and getting feedback, and how do you present the thing that you sell or do, right?Lesley Logan 23:21  Absolutely certain that there were NDAs signed of people who were looking at the iPhone before we got it. Brad Crowell 23:27  Yeah, but Julian pointed out that you have to be confident enough that the universe will present you what you need when you need it, riht? Lesley Logan 23:35  Yeah.Brad Crowell 23:36  And that is a scary thing. That is the "leap and the net will appear" kind of approach, right? And obviously, that's definitely something that gets severely tested, and Julian acknowledged that, for sure, especially when you have financial needs, and the wrong clients are coming through your door, but saying... y'all were talking about clients, and the clients that will stay with you for the long haul or not, right? And it's always a scramble at first, like we'll take anybody who comes in the door, but what if our messaging, like we were just talking about, was attracting the correct person who we want to serve and is excited to get the transformation? Yeah, they're going to stay with you way, way longer. And I am... I don't know if you picked up on it if you listened to the interview, but I was so proud because we had a bunch of agency members fill out his big questionnaire, and he compared agency members' stats against the industry stats. And what he said was that agency members retain their clients longer. Yeah, and I was really, really excited to hear that.Lesley Logan 24:49  Yeah and it's because our Agency members, even their process to become a client of theirs sets them up so that they're not getting these crazy wackos that just want to bounce from place to place. They are actually set up to make sure that they are the right client, they're advertised in the right place. One of our members is actually changing her website to being specifically their Pilates studio for women over 40.Brad Crowell 25:15  Cool.Lesley Logan 25:15  Right? Because she's like, "I'm tired of getting calls from 20-year-olds who are comparing me to this other studio over here. That's not what we offer. And even if they can't afford my intro offer, they don't like the classes because they're not for Pilates princesses." And it's like, right. So, there are women who are fucking tired, like, "I want to go to Pilates, but all these Pilates princesses are pictured." And so this client of ours has women over 40 pictured. That's going to matter so much to them, right. And so I am so proud of our agency members. They have solid businesses, and you have a business you can depend on, you're not going off what the trends are. And I really think that right now the Pilates bubble is bursting in several ways. One, Hailey Bieber just announced that too many studios are out there, and they're crappy teachers. Hailey Bieber wrote this. And then The Guardian did an entire article about how people are getting hurt all the time doing Pilates. And here's the thing: if you were doing real Pilates, you could not get hurt if you were actually ready for the exercise that you're doing. Most of the time, people are getting injuries because they're in large group classes that are not on real reformers, and or their teacher was not trained thoroughly enough, and so the teacher's boss is all about how fun the class is and how entertained and how packed the classes are versus the results that they're getting. And I think Julian would back me up on this. Going back to the transformation you want to have and the investment you have to have: I have to get you that transformation, which means you have to show up, but I have to have the teachers that are quality. And so I actually think between the recession that we are all expecting to show up and the fact that people are not going to see the results they want by studios where the people aren't trained fully.Brad Crowell 27:04  Yeah.Lesley Logan 27:05  I do see the pendulum swinging now. How far is it? It's not going to swing that far if you are a solid studio that truly knows what you're doing and why you do it, and you're not begging people to take class for you by offering it for free, but instead you're like, "If you want to participate here, here's how often you have to come, here's the transformation we can provide you, and here's how we do that." You come every other week, I can't get you shit.Brad Crowell 27:26  Yeah, and being real with them. That's where that confidence comes into play, having the confidence to know that the universe will present you what you need when you need it. I remember trying to convince clients, I remember how much time I spent trying to convince clients that we were the right agency for them, or coaching group for them, or web development company for them, or whatever. And it always felt like I'm really good at that, but then we would land a client and they were just the fucking worst client. They never delivered the photos that they said that they had, or they never gave me copy, and so ultimately I'd start this project, we would take a deposit, start the project, and then get stuck, right? Or we would have clients come in, they'd pay us one time for coaching, and then they would never participate, and then they would disappear. And that just felt like such a waste of effort on both our time and theirs.Lesley Logan 28:25  Totally.Brad Crowell 28:26  That time payment didn't feel worth it. It certainly wasn't satisfying. We didn't help them, right? And so.Lesley Logan 28:31  It's also why we've even changed how agency operates now, because it definitely is only attractive to people who are willing to actually do the work.Brad Crowell 28:39  Yeah.Lesley Logan 28:39  You have to do the work. You can't just do calls with me or Brad every quarter and whine and whatever, and then go, "Well, I got this action, I can go make a checklist, and I can feel like I did something new." No, Agency now requires you to ask a lot of questions, put your problem in there, go watch a course, come to an office hour, ask which course to watch, ask what next steps to take, like, you actually have to do the action. And the reason I love that more, even though it's definitely not a sexier sell, is that what we do actually fucking works. I know that, and the people who've listened to us have been with us for years, and when they do the work, it works. Period, end of story. And we recently were at an event, and I saw one of our ex-Agency members who paid because they wanted the transformation, but didn't want to do the work. And then this person would also do the things I said not to do all the time, and then they would come back with a problem. And it's like, "Okay, with the contract you've already signed, there's not a lot I can do, because you made a contract without asking our opinions, and then you signed it." And that person is like, "Yeah, I've just been so overwhelmed, and I'm closing these two studios, I'm doing this, I'm just downsizing a lot." And I just wanted to go, "I fucking told you." Yeah, but here's the thing: I have courage and conviction in how we coach and who we are for, and I know what we can do with people who will do the work. And that means, though, you have to also have courage and conviction in what you offer as a studio. And if that means telling someone, "I actually don't work with clients who are in and out every single week, unless they're gonna do homework, and if you're gonna do homework, it means you have to do it three to four days a week." You have to tell people, "I just don't work with those people, because I don't want to take your money, that's dirty money." Any studio that takes your money and tells you that they can get you what you want, and you're only going to come in once a week or every couple of weeks, is lying to you. If you educate people on that, I'm telling you, you will get a great client. And here's why I can tell you this with my own courage and conviction, with another story: I used to sell a teacher training program for Equinox, and I would always ask people, "Where are you in your research process? Oh, I'm the first person you're talking to? Great, let me explain to you how training programs are not apples to apples. Let me explain to you what it is that you need to be looking for, what questions to be asking." By the way, these are all in my book. "What questions to be asking, what you need to be experiencing, what these things are. When you go and look to other places, I want you asking these questions, because if they don't have answers that work with your life, it does not matter the price, you will be stuck. So I can tell you right now, based on the local programs that I know that exist, we are more expensive on paper, but here's where we solve a lot of those problems. Why don't you go back, do your research, call me back, let's do another thing." I could follow up with them, and there'd be people who say, "You're too expensive, that's too much time, I can't make blah blah blah." And then they would come back and they'd sign up, because they would go do the research, and they would realize that on paper, while we're more expensive, we actually have more things. So you have to have that with people, because if someone's gonna price shop, they're gonna price shop, but I can tell you why. "Oh, well, we're more expensive than them because we're three people, not 12." Hello, educate them. They don't know.Brad Crowell 31:53  Yeah, they don't know. Lesley Logan 31:55  So you're getting resentful of them, but they don't know what they don't know. You have to say.Brad Crowell 31:58  Yeah can also say something like, "Our teachers have 600 hours of certifications under their belt," or something like that.Lesley Logan 32:04  Yeah, when people would do that when we were at the studios, like, "Oh, well, this is more expensive than the Pilates across the street." "Yeah, well, those teachers can only teach on one item, they can only teach on a Reformer, and that's all they're trained on. These are comprehensively trained teachers. These people did at least nine months to a year of training, they spent $8,000-plus, and they have access to all this equipment to get you the goals you want. But if you have to go off of that investment, I get it, go do it over there." Anyways, well, I could keep talking for hours, but we should get to the Be It Action Items, because clearly, I love Julian's data, and I love that we can help people. Knowing what the data is really helps us understand where they are in their business and what they have to focus on. Because you're not going to focus on new clients and retention at the same time. If you have great retention, you don't need new clients.Brad Crowell 32:51  Right.Lesley Logan 32:52  You know, you don't need as many anyways. Okay.Brad Crowell 32:54  Yeah. Well, stick around, we'll be right back. All right. So, finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items: what bold, executable, intrinsic, or targeted action items can we take away from your conversation with Julian Barnes? He said on client commitment and transformation, Julian said that the first step in the transformation is transforming your daily routine. He emphasized that people need to adopt a new routine, one that says, "I'm coming on Tuesday morning, Thursday after work, and Saturday morning. I'm committed to this change," right? For studio owners, you are more likely to be successful if you present a prescription that gives your client the opportunity to adopt a new routine from day one.Lesley Logan 33:41  Yeah.Brad Crowell 33:41  Right? Like, think about it, if you've got a person coming in the door and you try to get them to make a change, let's say you've had a client for a really long time, and then you try to get them to make a change, do they make the change? Very rarely, right? People get annoyed at change, they get frustrated at change, they like what they like, they like what they have. But if you set that precedent right out of the gate, this is how people get change here.Lesley Logan 34:08  Yes, right, I love that. Well, also, I had a client who was always late, and they'd always apologize, and I had a client before them and after them, and I never gave them more time, and they weren't asking. I said, "Hey, don't apologize to me. This is on you. If you only want a 45-minute session, I have no problem with that. But if you want the full session, you have to ask yourself why you don't feel worthy enough to have a full session so that you can figure out how you have to leave work early. But that's the change you have to make. It has to be based on what you want, it can't be on me." And you know what? She was never late again.Brad Crowell 34:41  Yeah, it's a great example, because what Julian said, which I thought was kind of snuck in there again, he said, "Keep your power."Lesley Logan 34:52  Yeah.Brad Crowell 34:53  Right? We have power. The power is that we are the authority figure, right? And I mean, not in a tyrant kind of a way, but you can say to someone, "This is how it works here, this is how we see people have success here, and this is what we recommend for you."Lesley Logan 35:10  I think we'll just go into my action takeaway, which is like, if you're actively listening to what they have to say, you literally hear what they are, and you use those words, and you connect them to how your services are offered, then you have to step into the authority, because they came to your house.Brad Crowell 35:26  Yeah.Lesley Logan 35:26  If this person came to your house, and you are a "no shoes in the house" person, would you just go, "I guess I'll let them wear shoes"? No, this is a no-shoes house, right? It's a no-shoes house. So, if you are like... I always tell people, take my shoes off, we don't, but you're the person who does, how come you can't be that at the business where you actually are an authority? This is where, I think a lot of people have doubt about the benefits that they can have, because they themselves have forgotten their own practice.Brad Crowell 35:53  Sure.Lesley Logan 35:54  And they themselves have not made any clients actually have consistency, and so they're not actually having the benefits to back up their power. But you have 100 years of Joe Pilates's work working to go off of. So if you are a new teacher, you have 100 years, literally 100 years. This is the year, this year is 100 years that he came to the United States to go off of this, and then you go... I'll give you the advice that I was given, and we'll wrap this up. My first week as a teacher at a studio at Equinox, this teacher said to me, "The best advice they can give you is to get one client and make them your own, like, make them obsessed with you, and you'll have all the clients." And I made those clients obsessed with me, and they did start getting results, results that they weren't getting with their other Pilates instructor, because I got them from... right, because that other Pilates instructor let them come and go. So, please, I was like, "Nope, you have to make up that session you're about to miss next Sunday. I'll see you on Friday. Let's do it. Let's go. I'll make the time." And it's because, one, I need the money, but two, I listened to that advice, and that advice gave me conviction and authority to sit here today and tell you, if you make people be consistent, they get results.Brad Crowell 37:05  Yeah.Lesley Logan 37:06  So be the boss. They came to you.Brad Crowell 37:08  Yeah, they came to you. Don't give away your power.Lesley Logan 37:11  If you need help with that, if you need these pep talks, you should just go to agency.Brad Crowell 37:15  Yeah, this couldn't be an easier segue here. Lesley Logan 37:19  I mean, so profitablepilates.com/agency go there. We have for sure, at the time that we're recording this, one amazing way to work with us. It's quite possible the second way, which is a secret, is available. I'm not sure.Brad Crowell 37:31  It's possible.Lesley Logan 37:32  possible. And if you don't see it, then you book a call with Brad, and you ask him which one is best for you and what's going on there. But we can help you. We can help you.Brad Crowell 37:40  We can certainly support you with these things.Lesley Logan 37:42  Yep.Brad Crowell 37:42  And you can keep your clients longer, too.Lesley Logan 37:44  Yeah, you get all the benefits that our clients get.Brad Crowell 37:47  Yeah.Lesley Logan 37:47  And also, guess what? You get a predictable, boring business, which is so nice. Go be entertained by your streamers, not by your business. Okay, life's stressful enough. I don't need an up and down on my business to be what's going on, what I'm going my vibes off of. Okay, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 38:04  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 38:05  Thank you so much. I hope this was fun. It was an interesting deep dive into the industry, and Julian, his company does some really great work that is on the data. So, BFS is the company. We'll put the links in the show notes. Share this with a Pilates instructor friend who needs to hear it.Brad Crowell 38:21  Yeah.Lesley Logan 38:22  And until next time, Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell 38:24  Bye for now.Lesley Logan 38:26  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 39:08  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 39:13  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 39:17  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 39:25  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 39:28  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Source material: https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1MOh13QGlWg5d_Ny6yPC4TxOmI6RWAUoxOdgX7qAZwBw/edit?usp=drive_link

Plenty of Pilates studios look successful from the outside. The numbers tell a different story. In this episode, Lesley Logan sits down in person with Julian Barnes, co-founder and CEO of the BFS Network, the boutique fitness industry's market intelligence company behind the annual State of the Industry report. Julian brings the data from 500-plus studios across 46 states. Lesley brings the how. Together they break down the five numbers that separate a real business from an expensive hobby, and what it actually takes to keep clients for years instead of weeks. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The five KPIs that profitable studios track every month.Why referrals still beat social media for new leads.How to structure an intro offer that converts.The objection scripts that turn a maybe into a yes.Why holding clients accountable is what kills churn.Episode References/Links:BFS Network – bfsnetwork.comBFS Pilates Studio Benchmarks Report - BFSreport.com or BFSpilatesreport.comFacebook https://beitpod.com/thebfsnetwork https://www.facebook.com/thebfsnetwork?mibextid=wwXIfr&mibextid=wwXIfrSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsGuest Bio:Julian Barnes is Co-Founder and CEO of the BFS Network, the premier growth accelerator and market intelligence company in the beauty, fitness, and self-care industry. He leads BFS' CEO Network — the premier peer-to-peer leadership network for multi-location, multimillion-dollar operators who are building to scale — and serves as Managing Director of the Global Leadership Council, whose members collectively operate more than 10,000 locations worldwide. He also serves as an Outside Director for a global fitness brand. Barnes created NYU's Institute in Entrepreneurship & Small Business Management and served on the US Tennis Association's Investment Committee, which managed a $200M portfolio. He holds a BA from Tufts and a JD from UNC Chapel Hill.If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Julian Barnes 0:00  You have to be confident enough, both in your own abilities and that the universe will provide for you the right way. You have to be confident enough to say no to the wrong person, so you keep space open for the right person, as you said, and you have to be confident that the universe is going to bring that right person to you.Lesley Logan 0:24  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:05  All right, Be It babe. This is really for my Pilates studio owners and teachers out there, people who want to open a Pilates studio. We are going to get deep in numbers, and you're hearing me talk a lot about my thoughts about the Pilates industry and how you are going to have a profitable Pilates business. So it's kind of fun. If you've never heard me talk Pilates business, and you want to hear my thoughts, you can. For those of you who are Profitable Pilates members, you're going to hear some of my favorite things to say, and I think you're going to be really impressed with how amazing your studios are doing compared to others. But also, I think it's really important to know what the stats are. What is going on in the Pilates history? It is changing. There are a lot of studios, but are these studios actually as successful as they look? Lesley Logan 1:28  So, I think this report is really fun. If you watch it on YouTube, you're gonna see the visuals of these numbers. If you're like me and need to see them, you can watch it there. We'll also have everything in the show notes and in the blog as well. You guys are awesome. Here is Julian from the BFS Network. Lesley Logan 1:43  All right, loves, this is gonna be fun. You guys get to hear me in my own element, probably a little more behind the scenes of what we do with other businesses, but we have an incredible guest here. We'll talk a lot of numbers, so if you're a visual person, you might want to watch this on our YouTube channel. Julian from the BFS Network, you are here. Hello, tell everyone who you are and what you rock at, because they're going to want to know.Julian Barnes 2:18  Lesley, I am here in your home studio in Las Vegas. This is not Zoom. This is.. I could touch your high five. Here we go. There we go. Awesome. Hello, everyone. My name is Julian Barnes. I am the co-founder and CEO of the BFS Network. I am based in New York City, here in Vegas to hang out with my good friend Lesley and Brad. We are the BFS Network. For today's conversation, the most important thing I'm going to share is we are known as the premier market intelligence company in the boutique fitness industry. We publish the State of the Industry report, which is the annual report, which is the most comprehensive report in our industry. A lot of data, a lot of KPIs, a lot of metrics, all focused on showing what profitable studios do. So I'm here today with Lesley, and I'm going to share some of the numbers, and she's going to tell us how to achieve those numbers.Lesley Logan 3:13  Yeah, I'm excited. Let's go, let's do it. I'm a visual person, so I'm glad you got a visual for us.Julian Barnes 3:18  So the first thing I want to just talk about is who participated in the survey. In addition to the Profitable Pilates community, this survey has been conducted over the last 18 months, 500-plus studios worldwide. Most importantly, it is the overwhelming majority, 89% of the studios that participated in the survey have three or fewer locations, and most of them have one location, individually owned, self-financed, no private equity, no investor. So we're talking about just the regular studio owner who bootstrapped and saved, and maybe borrowed from the bank to open, that's who's in here. There's no Solidcore in here, there's no Barry's, there's no SoulCycle. And if there are some independent Club Pilates franchisees, they're individually owned, they're not big corporate, so that's.Lesley Logan 4:17  Not one of those people who owns 75 or 100 sharing. Yeah, yeah.Julian Barnes 4:21  Exactly. All right, so that's who's in it. Also, there's broad geographical distribution of the survey, meaning 45% of the responses came from cities with a population of half a million or more, 45% came from cities 50,000 to half a million, another 10% are rural areas less than 50,000, 46 out of 50 states, so we have geographic representation, we have market size representation, one, two, and three locations, no PE, no investors, so we're talking about the average mom-and-pop small studio everywhere in this country.Lesley Logan 4:57  Okay, you know I'm gonna want to have dinner where the four states are, so we got a find studio close to. Julian Barnes 5:01  It's like three S's. No, three N's. So it's North Dakota, Nebraska, and I forget the other two.Lesley Logan 5:08  Okay, I have a really great city for you, Nebraska solo owner, really pretty incredible, open for over 20 years. Julian Barnes 5:13  That's what we need. Okay. So that's who we're talking about. The way we're going to rock today is talk about the BFS scorecard, which is six KPIs. I'm going to share with the listeners, all of you, the six KPIs that profitable studios track, and I'm going to tell you what those KPIs are. And then we're going to come back, and I'm going to ask Lesley how and what a studio should do to achieve those KPIs. So, I am the "what" today; Lesley is going to be the "how."Lesley Logan 5:49  Yeah. So, for those of you, this is how it was explained to me, and I think this is a lot of fun for my peeps to listen. He's gonna be that Steve Kornacki at the big board, and I'm gonna come in as Rachel Maddow or Chris Hayes. I mean, obviously I watch a news channel, so there we go. So I'm gonna come in with my opinion and my punditry.Julian Barnes 6:07  You don't have blonde hair, so you're not that other channel.Lesley Logan 6:09  I'm not. Also, these are still my cheeks, my lips, my eyes.Julian Barnes 6:18  All real, keeping it real. Okay, so KPI number one is number of leads per month, and Profitable Pilates studios generally are generating somewhere between 10 to 50 leads per month. The number one response is more than 50 leads, so 30% of the respondents generated more than 50 leads, and then the tie for second was less than 10 leads per month and 10 to 25. Less than 10 was 20%, 10 to 25 is 21%, so that's basically a tie. I don't know for sure, but if I had to guess, the studios that are generating more than 50 leads a month are probably mat Pilates with larger class sizes, and yeah, they need more leads.Lesley Logan 7:09  I think anytime you need more leads, it's probably better having more class-based classes. Yeah.Julian Barnes 7:13  Exactly. And so the studios with less than 10 or 10 to 25 are probably more of the Reformer.Lesley Logan 7:19  Yeah.Julian Barnes 7:19  So number of leads per month is the first metric to track. I'm going to run through these quickly, and then we're going to come back. Okay, so the first KPI is number of leads per month, and the highest response was more than 50 leads per month. 30% of the Profitable Pilates studios that we surveyed generate more than 50 leads per month, and I would imagine that the majority of those are Pilates mat classes, where they have more people in seats and bigger studios, and they need to fill classes. Tied for second was less than 10 leads per month and 10 to 25 leads per month, and that is between 20 and 21% of the people who completed this assessment selected less than 10 and 10 to 25. So number of leads per month is the first KPI that we're going to talk about. Second KPI is the conversion rate, and let's see if I can do this, because I'm not an idiot, is what I told you, right?Lesley Logan 8:19  You're doing great. So there we go.Julian Barnes 8:22  Conversion rate of leads to first-time visitors. I can't wait for Lesley to break this down, but it's one thing for someone to email you, to DM you, to IM you to say, "I'm interested, send me more information about your studio." It's another thing for that person to actually walk in the door, and so conversion rate of lead to first-time visitor, Profitable Pilates studios are converting at more than 30%. 54% of the Profitable Pilates studios are converting at more than 30%. So think about that: for every 10 leads, the best studios are getting three of those 10 emails to walk in the door, right? So, conversion rate of leads to first-time visitors. Now they came, they took a class, they bought the intro offer. The question is, what percentage of those people made a second, bigger purchase? They already purchased the intro offer. I like to think about it like this: you go to a restaurant the first time and you have a nice meal. My question is always, am I going to come back? And especially if you bring a friend with you, maybe it's your favorite restaurant, and you bring a friend with you to your favorite restaurant, and you pay for the dinner. The question for your friend is, did you enjoy your dinner, and did you enjoy your dinner enough that you would come back and pay for it? That second purchase, same thing applies with studios, so they bought the intro offer. Did they come back? And Profitable studios, 55% of Profitable Pilates studios convert to a second, bigger purchase more than 30% of the time. So see how small these numbers get: for every 10 leads, three walk in the door, and of those three that walk in the door, only one is making a next purchase. So Lesley's gonna break that down. She is chomping up the bits, waiting for me. Lesley Logan 10:13  I can't wait. Julian Barnes 10:13  All right, so those are the first three KPIs. Okay, so the last two KPIs we'll talk about are average member lifetime value, which is how long they stay, and so the largest category for Profitable Pilates studios, 28% of Profitable Pilates studios have a lifetime value greater than two years. The good news is, hence the name of Profitable Pilates, that 71% of the Profitable Pilates studios that completed this assessment have an LTV of more than two years, and that's really important. I'll let Lesley weigh in on why that's important, but the number is more than two years. You want to be an LTV more than two years. Julian Barnes 10:56  And finally, the last KPI we're going to talk about today is churn, and churn means how often your members leave and you have to go refill that spot. You can't grow if you're constantly replacing someone in your studio. So Profitable Pilates studios, 43% of profitable Pilates studios minimize churn to less than 5%, but here again, the Profitable Pilates community that Lesley runs, 71% of the people who completed this assessment have a churn less than 5%.Julian Barnes 11:31  So let's recap. The five KPIs are number of leads per month, converting those leads from lead to first visit, converting the first visit to a second purchase, assuming the first visit is an intro offer, second purchase, then how long do they stay, and do you retain them by minimizing churn? Those are the five KPIs. That's what Profitable studios do in the Pilates sector. Lesley, now tell the people.Lesley Logan 12:02  Oh my gosh.Julian Barnes 12:03  Tell the people, Lesley, what they're supposed to do to achieve these numbers. How do they get these number of leads per month?Lesley Logan 12:11  Okay, so here's a really great... I just want to say I'm really proud of the people who filled this out, because my goal has always been for the people we coach for the long term. I'm like, your business should get really boring, like it should get really predictable. My goal is that some of our people need one lead a month because they actually don't have room, and they're actually referring out to other businesses in the area. That obviously is more of a smaller studio that doesn't have large group classes, but that is the absolute goal, because it's better to be entertained in your life, your business should not be so entertaining. Lesley Logan 12:39  So what I would say is, for studios to have a really great conversion, if you don't know how many leads you're getting a month, that's important. You got to start there, and you want to know where they're coming from, because that really does help you understand where you're spending your time marketing. Everyone tries to sell you to the moon and back that you should be on social media. You might not need to be, depends on your community, right? Depends on how many people are there, and depends on how many leads you need. I know that sounds crazy in 2026 that I would tell someone that it's not about social media, but it's not, more and more people are not necessarily trusting what they're seeing on socials because of AI and things like that. So, you really want to have an amazing network of clients who love you, who refer people out, so you're getting strong, solid leads, because those are gonna be the ones that actually come in over just reaching out to see what's going on.Julian Barnes 13:22  You just said something I want to jump on. I didn't mention it, but we also asked studio owners what was their most effective lead gen tactic. You want to guess what that answer is, Lesley?Lesley Logan 13:33  Referral.Julian Barnes 13:34  By far, in every modality.Lesley Logan 13:39  Yes. And here's what people.Julian Barnes 13:40  It's two to one, like it wasn't close. And again, these are profit, not just Pilates, all modalities. The number one lead gen tactic is referrals. So when you said people don't trust what's on the social and socials, what do people trust?Lesley Logan 13:56  They trust their friends.Julian Barnes 13:57  They trust people they know, people who they know, like, and trust.Lesley Logan 14:00  So here's the thing: if you are a new business right now, or you need people right now, if you're spending all of your time marketing yourself through stuff online and buying ads, that's one way to do it. And you will get people. I'm not saying that doesn't work, but you will get more people quicker if you actually tell the people who know, like, and trust you, whether they're clients or not, "Here's what my studio does, here's who we help, here's how we help them. Who do you know?" If you say, "Who do you know?" it opens a loop. You open a loop, people aren't likely to say, "I don't know anyone," because they'd have to think about that. But if you say, "Who do you know?" it opens this loop, and they start being aware of it. And if their friend's like, "Oh, my shoulder hurts," they go, "Oh, I just heard about the studio down the street." People will refer you people, and those are the people who actually come in, more likely than not, than someone who's just cruising the internet and filling out the contact form. Whoever fills out the contact form, honestly, it's whoever gets to them first and doesn't bug them.Julian Barnes 14:49  Let's take the people behind the scenes for a second. Before this call, we were chilling out in your backyard, and is it safe to say that we have some fundamental disagreements about how studios actually operate some things, right?Lesley Logan 15:27  I think that's okay, though.Julian Barnes 15:36  I wanted them to know that the things you and I agree on are the most important fundamental aspects of running a business. The things we disagree on, I say they're on the fringe, they're just a matter of choice. But this, having referrals, know, like, and trust that, it is tested over time.Lesley Logan 15:26  Yeah, I mean, it's so true. And also, it just makes it a lot easier on you if you need clients today. You opened the studio recently, or you hired a new teacher, or you opened some new classes, you need people to fill those seats today, you will always have a faster rate of transitioning them into clients if you're going to your community and the people who trust you, because they will talk about you, they will have a trust transference. If you are waiting for people to fill out your contact form, then it's like, well, they wanted you at 11:00 PM last night while they were watching someone on some TV show doing what they thought was Pilates, so they reached out, but now it's 8:00 AM or 9:00 AM in the morning and they're at work. Then it's like, "Well, I'm too busy this weekend," so you got to get people when they're excited. Lesley Logan 16:07  If you have a 30% conversion rate from the lead into coming in, that's great. I actually don't think that that's a terrible... I think if you have higher than that, you are doing great, but if you have lower than that, that's where I have concern. I feel like 30% feels very fair. Where I want you to really look at is from that, when they come in, if you have a lower than 30% conversion rate, you really do have an issue, because the numbers just get so small, and you're actually just wasting a lot of time. You're working really hard. And so I think this is where you, as an owner, need to look at what your onboarding experience is. How are you setting people up? Are you getting them with the right teacher? Are you the only person who's teaching them? Then it really is on you, what's going on?Lesley Logan 16:47  And this is where I think a lot of people make mistakes, because they try to sell Pilates, or whatever the modality is. People actually don't want to buy process; they want to buy the transformation, they want to buy the passion from you. And so this is where, if you're a studio owner and you're not the one who's doing these intro offers, they're going into a class, or they're going into another teacher's experience. You need someone who's got passion and actually can read the person, because you have to take what their goal is and what you offer and show how they get there. Nobody wants to hear, "Oh, you're going to buy the four-session-a-week package," because that's, no, that's a process. They want to buy in on the belief that you have that you can get them to where they want to go.Julian Barnes 17:24  You just said the magic word, and I don't know if people really heard you or want to go back. You said they want to buy the what, starting with the letter T?Lesley Logan 17:34  Oh, the transformation.Julian Barnes 17:35  Say that again.Lesley Logan 17:36  The transformation. They want the transformation, they want the end result.Julian Barnes 17:38  I like to say that there is no transformation without the transaction. There is no transformation without the transaction. So you have to ask the question, why are you here, and you have to actively listen to what they say, and then be prescriptive in your answer to the question. Okay, so you want X, Y, or Z. Great. Here's how you're going to get that: two times a week, three times a week. You're going to take this class, that class, this class, etc. You're going to give them a prescription, just like a doctor would give you a prescription, and tell them when they ask what does it cost, you reframe it. The investment for you to achieve your desired goal is going to be one of time and money. The time is twice a week or three times a week, and the monthly investment for that is going to be X.Lesley Logan 18:29  I agree so much, because if you can actually get them to understand that this is a tool to the transformation, and they can make that transaction, and you break it down, you can also be honest with them, and this is where trust is really built. Some people are going to come to you with goals that are not in alignment with what you do. If you actually tell them... for example, in Pilates in LA, every single person wants to lose five pounds, and it's like, "Well, here's what we know about science. Science would say, if you want to lose weight, it's a few different factors, and any fitness is part of the journey, but it's not the tool." The actual tool, especially if you're serving women, is: what are your hormones like? What are you eating? And then you can go from there. But if all you do is work out to lose weight, you might lose a couple pounds, you might change the metabolism you've got, but it's actually not going to get you to the goal. Lesley Logan 19:20  And so this is where it's really cool for people, and this is what I coach people on their first-time sessions, is find out what they're there for, and then tell them you can or can't help them. So I would always say, "Here's how Pilates is going to be part of your journey, here's what we can't do, but here's what we can do." First of all, most people are lied to so much, or sold a bunch of smoke and mirrors, that they actually will like that you told them that. They might not buy from you, they might go to someone else, or they might try something else and come back, because they actually believe and trust you. I really do believe in being authentic here. And then when you're teaching the sessions, you need to actually tell them, "Here's why I've chosen this exercise for you, here's why this exercise is going to hit your goals." That's what people don't do, they just keep talking about Pilates this, Pilates that. Pilates is now on every corner, so maybe that worked in the 1990s or might have worked in the early 2000s, but it doesn't work today. You actually have to say, "With my eye, I'm seeing your shoulder is doing this, and you have back pain, and so what I'm seeing is because of this imbalance, you're gonna have back pain until we get this balanced. So, here's these three exercises we're going to do, and they're going to help you with this." You have to actually tell them, take them behind the scenes. I like to say that their first sessions, their intro sessions, are like going to a buffet. They get to see all the different options, and you're going to talk about all the different options, and then you're going to prescribe them, like Julian said, like, "Hey, okay." First of all, I never say, "Did you like that?" You got to just go with confidence. You're like, "Thank you for letting me teach you," because that gives gratitude, it lets them know the session's over, and then you go into, "You said you wanted this. Here's how we're going to get there. Here's the process." Julian Barnes 19:20  Here's the roadmap.Lesley Logan 19:20  Yes. And then if they're like, "Whoa, that's too much for me." If you go through all the investment and all the time, and they're like, "That's more than I can spend right now," you can say, "I understand. We can take a little longer; instead of coming three times a week, we can do two times a week, or we can do this and this," but you have to actually help them find a way. I get it, some people don't work out, so that's not even the money, it's the actual going from zero times at the gym to coming three times. You're asking a lot, so this is where you have to be honest, and this is where I think our industry really needs a little kick in the pants, and a nice one. People that are with me a long time have heard me say this: if you aren't going to hold people accountable to their goals, you're going to become a to-do that they move around all the time.Julian Barnes 21:28  1,000%. And remember, they came to you. You didn't go find them.Lesley Logan 21:34  Yeah.Julian Barnes 21:35  Even if you did, even if you went to the local farmers market, you didn't force them to give you their email. Lesley Logan 21:40  Yeah.Julian Barnes 21:40  They gave you their email. They walked into the door. You have to ask them why they walked in, and you have to actually listen, so you can connect what they said with what you're going to say. You know what you're going to say, you know what your packages are. The question is, can you connect your packages to the goal they told you they want to achieve? It is not about giving permission, you are the person in the position of authority.Lesley Logan 22:09  Well, that's the thing. You just said you are the person in the position of authority, and that's where people don't see themselves.Julian Barnes 22:15  Retain your power.Lesley Logan 22:16  And so when people come to us, I have to constantly remind them that you're so worthy. If you have people who are late canceling and you're not charging them, I promise you, you're losing that client. That's not a client you want, by the way, but it's also you're losing that client because when push comes to shove. Julian Barnes 22:31  They're not committed. Lesley Logan 22:33  Right. When their budget has an issue, when something comes up, they're like, "Oh, I'm going to cancel my Pilates," because they're not actually seeing results, because you didn't hold them accountable to get results. I think this is where people really have to actually remember there is such a thing as you being in relation to them, and there is a camaraderie, but you're also the expert. They came to you, and the only way that they can exchange the energy is to pay you that worth, but you have to hold them accountable so that they get those results. And when you get them the results, that's why you don't have churn, that's why your churn is so low, and that's why you'll have clients for life. And by the way.Julian Barnes 23:05  We're gonna come back to that. Lesley Logan 23:05  Okay I just want to say, I think a lot of people go, "Oh, this person came to me, I hope they like me." You can't be like that if you want a business that actually works and doesn't stress you out at the end of the day. You have to actually have the authority, because you are the expert. They don't know.Julian Barnes 23:21  You have to be a little bit like Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs said you don't ask the customer what they want; you tell the customer what they need. None of us raised our hand and said we want a phone, remember the Blackberries and the Treos, and we want a contact management thing, we want to surf the web. No one said, "I want that." He presented it to us and said, "Here, isn't this cool?"Lesley Logan 23:45  Yeah, right. I think that's where, I understand some people's first-time sessions are in a group class. I would argue that that's a harder way to sell things. I would absolutely say, if you are a class-based studio and you want to have clients for life, you should have some sort of onboarding that allows them to be either on their own or in a very small group of other people who are also on an intro, so that you can actually find out why they're there and actually tell them how these exercises on whatever equipment you're teaching them actually help them reach their goal. Because if you just put them in a class with a bunch of other people, first of all, they get lost, and the experienced people get annoyed if the teacher keeps teaching to the newbie. You're going to lose people; they're going to start going, "I'm not getting challenged here, I'm going to this studio over here." So, I really do believe in an onboarding journey. And, of course, people are going to say, "Oh, this studio over here will let me in." Great, you should go to that studio that doesn't have any worries about you getting hurt and doesn't want your sessions to be personalized. No problem. I understand you want to get started. I actually believe in villainizing a little bit of the thing that you are not doing, so that you can actually tell people, "Here's why you wanted to work with me. Here's why you want to trust me, because I actually care about why you're here, and you're not just a number on my Reformer, you're actually a person whose impact I want. I want you to have the transformation you wanted." But I also think when they're in that first session, whatever it is, a week or a session, I really do think if you don't tell them what you're seeing in their body that's keeping them from the goal they want to have, you are missing out on an opportunity for them to understand how smart you are and how much of an expert you are. If you tell me that you want to have better posture and I'm seeing that your hip is up to one side, you have to tell people, "Oh, I noticed this, no wonder your posture is having problems. So here we're going to do these exercises." I always said this, but I think it's really where people miss out. This is where teachers keep it to themselves and they actually don't tell the client what they're seeing; they just pick exercises, but the person doesn't know why you're picking that. So, you have to peel back the curtain, so that they can see that you're in there with them, you're a partner in this journey, and you're gonna hold them accountable to hitting the goals they want, and then when they hit those, you're gonna set new ones.Julian Barnes 25:40  Right. All right, so let's talk about KPI number three: percentage of new visitors who purchase a membership or a bigger package. So we're talking specifically about people who purchase the intro offer, they finish the one week or the two week or the one month, whatever the intro offer is, they finished that. Did they pull out their credit card and make a second purchase? What should studios do, owners, and instructors do to increase the probability of a yes?Lesley Logan 26:11  I love this question so much. I'm going to take us back a little bit. So I want to go back to the intro offer. You need to pick an intro offer that actually fits the goals you need. If you need a lot of clients, the intro offer needs to be very simple, very easy. I wouldn't even give people two weeks, I think that is crazy nonsense. I also don't like free; I think you have to charge. It's very hard to go from zero to whatever you're charging. So, I would say if you need clients yesterday, you're doing a single-session intro offer with a very much hands-on experience, where someone is told, you find out what they need in an interview style, and then a concierge style at the end about what's going on. That's what you need. If you don't need a ton of clients, then your intro offer can be a little longer, and can actually be a higher need to say yes, meaning instead of doing a private session and the intro offer is $60 for one session, it might be $180 for three. That obviously is going to get rejected more, because it's a bit more. "I don't know if I want to spend $180 on you, I just met you, I don't even know you." But you don't need a lot of people, so you're like, "I only want the best to come through," right? So you really want to make sure you're picking that. Now, obviously, the higher the intro offer's time and money commitment is, the more likely you're actually going to have a second purchase if they do it in a condensed form of time. That's why I disagree with two weeks or one month, I really do, especially for in-person. I think you want to keep things quick, because when that dopamine high is happening, that's when they're more likely to buy. If it's three sessions that they can take over three weeks, good luck, because they only felt the high in the moment when they drove their car home, they actually didn't get the benefits. But if it's three sessions in one week, you're more likely to get that second purchase. You want people to feel the benefits, because let's be really honest: Joe Pilates has a quote that everyone likes to use, but they don't finish the sentence. "In 10 Pilates sessions, you feel different. In 20 sessions, you look different. In 30 sessions, you have a whole new body." But they don't finish it: "If you come three to four times a week, or your money back." That's what Joe said, that's what his ad said. If you're just coming to Pilates once a week, it'd be like trying to study Spanish once a week. I can recognize words, but I'm not going to be able to understand Bad Bunny, that's not happening. I have to do it multiple times a week, and science is there, no matter the modality. Unless you're doing something three or four times a week, you're actually not making a change.Julian Barnes 26:58  Well, that's the key, right? Earlier you said you're here for the transformation. The first step, I would argue, in the transformation is transforming your daily routine. What you just said is people need to adopt a new routine that says, "I'm coming on Tuesday morning, Thursday after work, Saturday morning." I'm committed to that change. See, hear these terms: commitment, investment, transformation. They need to commit. You need to present them with a prescription. You are more likely to be successful if you present a prescription that gives them the opportunity to adopt a new routine from day one.Lesley Logan 28:10  Here's the thing: you will sound more confident when you're talking with them if you're making them rise up to the occasion. It is understanding their intake forms.Julian Barnes 29:12  You're leading them to rise to the occasion.Lesley Logan 29:18  Yes. Here's the thing: are you more likely to come to the person who says, "When do you want to come in?" If you're someone who's listening who says, "When do you want to come in? Do you want to come in next week?" I'm going to tell you right now, your business is a hobby, and eventually the IRS is going to audit you, so that's not going to be good for you. You're not gonna be profitable. If you're telling people, "Hey, you should come, you're gonna come two times a week. I have 10:00 AM on Tuesdays and Thursdays, does that work for you?" That is me telling you. You're going, "Hmm, does it work for me?" But you're not, you're more likely to look at your calendar like, "When do I want to come in? Oh, next week actually feels really full. Now I can't come in," right? You want to actually tell people and prescribe people and have the confidence in what you're doing, and this is where I think a lot of people have a lot of fear. "Oh my god, they'll think I'm being rude." No, they won't. They're going to think that you're in control. This is a business. It's a business. Lesley Logan 30:06  And also, I don't want to waste people's money, so you can even say that. Look, here's the deal: if you're only going to come once every other week, this is kind of a waste of money. You shouldn't really do this; you could probably do something at home on YouTube. If you really want the transformation, you have to commit to it, and the commitment looks like this. That's where I would say, whether you do memberships or packages, I don't like unlimited, because that is craziness, you also can't prescribe people the times to come in. "If you want to hit this goal in the next three months, I recommend our three-time-a-week commitment. If that's too much for you, there's a two-time..." You have these things that people can choose, a journey, a path. If you're only gonna have one time a week, here's the deal: you can never miss, and I'm gonna need you to do homework, because the reality is, one time a week, if that's all you can afford time or money-wise, I get that something is better than nothing, but you gotta do something at home. Otherwise, it is a waste of your time and money, and I don't wanna waste your money. And when you talk like that with people, they're like, "Oh, this person really knows what they're talking about." When you ask them, "When do you want to come in?" a broken clock is right two times a day. You're going to get some people, but those are the type-A people who happen to be near you or close to you, and they kind of like you. You're not going to have a business where it's easy to predict how much money you're going to make month after month.Julian Barnes 31:15  Would you say that transformation requires the three C's? You need to change your routine, you need to be consistent about the changes you're making in routine, and you have to be willing to get rid of your comfort zone, get out of your comfort zone. Very little change occurs when you're comfortable.Lesley Logan 31:37  Oh, you know what happens: if you don't change, the world does, and you just actually get further behind. So I do think that... I love all those three C's, and I think that's really helpful for people. Here's the thing, the objections you're going to get are three. There might be some other ones, but these are the three I've heard teaching for a really long time, and I used to run nine studios for a high-end fitness company, so I have heard them all, which are: "I don't have the money." Guess what, everyone says that when they actually don't really want to tell you why they can't do it, or they didn't like it. It's an easier thing. You're not going to go show me your wallet, right? So, "I don't have the money," and "I don't have the time." This is one for people who want change, but they're afraid of leaving their comfort zone. So, this is where you actually have to have a speech ready in hand. "I get that. I'm a very busy person. Here's what we're going to do: we are going to pre-schedule your sessions for the next month, so you can schedule your whole life around it. How about we start two weeks out, because it's a little easier? Two weeks out, it's not overwhelming. We're going to schedule your whole life around it, and because of our cancellation policy, you're going to cancel your friends over this, and you're actually going to get the transformation." Or they have to "think about it." If they have to think about it, there's a couple things going on. You weren't good enough at making sure they understood how what you're doing is going to help them with their transformation. You didn't get an honest goal out of them, or you actually didn't tell them how you're going to get there, so they're kind of in, but they're not sure. Or you have way too many offers. If you have too many offers, "I don't know what to do. If I see we have these packages, and we have these packages, we have this class over here, we have this class over here..." It's too confusing for me, and I have to think about it. You want things to be very easy for people to make a yes. And so, if they have to say, "Oh, I have to talk to my husband," that is also a way of saying, "I don't have the money," or "I'm not sure," because most women have the ability to spend the money on what they want. The first time I ever heard this as a brand new teacher, I said, "No problem. If your husband has any questions, here is my number. Remember, these are the goals we talked about, here's how we're going to get there." And if you want me to chat with him about how this is going to work out, I'm happy to do that. Guess what? He came up to my studio the next day and he said, "My wife can come as much as she wants, whatever she wants, she can come as much as she wants. I just want her to be happy," right? Most of the time it's not the husband; it's that she was not sure if she was worthy of the commitment, and we have to hold space for that. But if you can actually think of the objections you have, and then come up with your responses ahead of time, you're gonna come off more confident when they have those. And then guess what, they can go think about it. Okay, great. "I'm gonna reach out next week, I'm gonna reach out tomorrow, I'm gonna call back on the follow-up. Is that okay with you?" You'd be surprised how many people come in if you follow up.Julian Barnes 34:04  Now, here's one of the areas where we may disagree. I agree with everything you just said. Sometimes it's okay to say, "We may not be for you."Lesley Logan 34:13  Oh, we're not going to disagree on that. I love that.Julian Barnes 34:17  I hear you. The three objections: don't have time, can't afford it, not sure. Okay, I hear you. We may not be the right place for you. We are the place for people who are willing to make a commitment to the transformation they seek. We work with people who are committed. We work with... and then whatever's in your community, you know, describe them. They might be business owners, executives, presidents of corporations, whatever is in your tribe, in your community. We work with the best of the best. If you want to be part of that, we'd love to have you, but I get it, we may not be for you, and that's okay. Lesley Logan 34:56  That's okay. Julian, I love this, because I just coached someone today, and she was talking about, "Oh, they got sick and they couldn't do this, and now they're good there." I said, "You should fire them as clients, they're not good clients." In fact, I would call that dirty money. Every single teacher out there who's taking clients who just come in willy-nilly, that is dirty money. It's actually never going to get you good referrals. There's certainly not gonna be a walking billboard. The best advice I ever got when I first started teaching Pilates, best advice, a teacher took me aside on my first day, and he goes, "Get one client and make them obsessed with you. You focus every energy and everything you have on that one client, and you will have clients for life." And he's not wrong. I was gifted a duet session from a teacher who was moving, and I took that to heart. They're like, "We can't come next week." I'm like, "Oh, well, I'll see you... let's go with an extra one this week. Gotta make it up."Julian Barnes 35:43  Exactly right.Lesley Logan 35:44  And they're like, "What? We don't do two in a week." I'm like, "Well, you're missing next week. I'm not gonna wait two weeks to see you. What change are we gonna have? We gotta do this." They never miss a session. Guess what? Within two weeks, I had two of their friends from their building, right? Because I was like, "If you want to work with me, this is how often you have to do this." And here's the thing: when you tell people, "We might not be for you," one, some people will rise to the occasion because they don't like to be rejected, and two, you're leaving space for someone who's going to actually add to the community and make your business successful. And, by the way, more importantly, you're going to make an impact on them, because it's not fun to teach people who are not committed it's, actually exhausting.Julian Barnes 36:18  I know you believe in karma.Lesley Logan 36:19  I do. Julian Barnes 36:20  Right, as we sit in a room full of crystals everywhere.Lesley Logan 36:24  Some people, I'm wondering when their karma is coming. I'm just gonna say.Julian Barnes 36:28  So you have to be confident enough that the universe will present you what you need when you need it, and that confidence is really tested when you have some financial needs and the wrong client walks in. You have to be confident enough, both in your own abilities and that the universe will provide for you the right way. You have to be confident enough to say no to the wrong person, so you keep space open for the right person, as you said, and you have to be confident that the universe is going to bring that right person to you.Lesley Logan 37:12  Yes. Well, and.Julian Barnes 37:13  But it's not going to always be on your schedule.Lesley Logan 37:15  No. And that... well, that's here's the thing, we've been talking about these different leads, you actually don't get to decide when people are going to finally come in the door. So you have to make sure that whatever you're doing is making sure it's put in front of them and reminded in front of them, and they're reminded again until they're like, "Oh, I'm finally ready." We actually don't get to decide when they come in the door, but once they're there, we absolutely can say, "You're in my house, and in my house, this is how we do things," right? Like my house, you can leave your shoes on, we got a dog, he goes in and out, this is a desert, we're fine, but some people's houses, the shoes go off. I was just at a friend's house who's in the Pilates industry, and he's like, "Yeah, you take your shoes off," and we went upstairs, and he's like, "Oh, there's a deck, put these slippers on," and I'm like, "Oh my god, there's so many rules!" But guess what, it's his house. Those are the rules of participating in his world, and so I would just say it's okay to have these rules. It really helps people understand the boundaries, and it will make for better clients who are more consistent, and guess what, they will go back to the best way to get clients: refer you better clients.Julian Barnes 38:15  Great. So now, how do we keep them? How do you recommend that your clients act in such a way as to increase lifetime value? First of all, what is lifetime value? Second, why is it important? Third, how do you increase it? What is it? Why is it important? How do you increase it?Lesley Logan 38:34  So you can correct me. I'm going to do a simple lifetime value with clients: like if you have clients for two years, how much money do you often make off them? And getting an average of a lifetime value really helps you understand how many clients you really kind of need for your business to predict or project what you want to make. You want to make a million dollars for your studio, and your average lifetime client is X. Then you need 25 of those clients to get there, right? So it really helps you understand the business you're going to have. And our businesses, we have a really amazing lifetime value of a lot of our clients. It's kind of insane for our membership bases that are online, what they are, and so once we know those, it really helps us understand how much money are we going to spend marketing, right? Especially if you're an on-demand business or membership basis.Julian Barnes 39:12  How much you're willing to invest in marketing.Lesley Logan 39:14  Yes.Julian Barnes 39:14  If you know that your member is paying you 100 bucks a month, which is 1,200 bucks a year, and they have an average tenure of two years, then you know that you have about $2,400 for every client.Lesley Logan 39:27  Yeah.Julian Barnes 39:28  So now you back, that's not even that's before profit.Lesley Logan 39:30  Yep. Okay. Yep.Julian Barnes 39:32  Now you back that down and back that out and say, "Well, how much am I willing to invest by an acquisition cost? Am I willing to invest $100 to make $2,400? Sure. Am I willing to invest $2,000 to make $2,400? Not so much."Lesley Logan 39:32  There are people who will do that, and I think they're crazy.Julian Barnes 39:33  So you know that number because you want to know how much you want to invest.Lesley Logan 39:37  Yes, and it's really important, and it really does take time to get that value if you're a brand new studio. This is going to be something. Julian Barnes 40:00  6 to 18 months, minimum. Lesley Logan 40:02  So it's really important. What was the second two questions?Julian Barnes 40:06  That's what it is. How do you keep your members with you for two, three, four years? How?Lesley Logan 40:14  Okay, so first of all, this is going to sound crazy. If your value system doesn't include commitment and consistency, you've already started your business off on the wrong foot for a long-term lifetime value of a client. You have to actually have in your value of your business, "We want committed or consistent clients." What are we going to do? It's part of our value system to make sure that happens. Maybe that comes from communication, maybe that comes from transparency, maybe that comes from responsibility, maybe that comes from community, but you have to decide in your value system how you're going to get there from the get-go. Because everything in your value system dictates how you make decisions on who you hire, what services you offer, what days you're open, all that stuff, right? Second thing is, if you're not making sure your clients are consistent, if you're just letting them cancel and there's no fees, they're not committed. Guess what, they're going to eventually go somewhere else, because no one's making sure they show up.Julian Barnes 41:11  The word there you're looking for, I think, is accountable.Lesley Logan 41:14  Yes.Julian Barnes 41:15  Accountable. You have to hold your clients accountable to the prescription for the transformation that they said they want. You didn't tell them what they wanted; they told you what they wanted. You told them how to get it.Lesley Logan 41:29  Yeah, exactly. So, I think this is where people are afraid they'll lose clients if they uphold a cancellation policy. Nope, you'll lose them because you didn't. Now, you might lose them in the beginning, like, "This is too harsh." Great, this is not the studio for you. That studio on the street is in charge, go there. I don't know if you'll get your goals, but you won't be charged for not showing up here. You said you wanted to do this; I held a space for you, right? It's really important. And you'll say it in your own words, but I promise you, I promise you, I had clients when I was in LA... I taught in LA for 12 years. I was there for 14, taught 12 years in LA, and when COVID hit, I still had more than half of my clients from the first year I started teaching.Julian Barnes 42:08  How? What did you do to maintain that LTV?Lesley Logan 42:12  Aside from my boundaries, if I traveled, there was a teacher coming into their space at their exact same time, so their schedule didn't change just because my schedule changed. I think this is really important: no matter the size of your space, you've got to have backups or a backup policy in place, so that you can get sick, have to travel, or have a baby, and make sure that they're taken care of at the schedule that they committed to, because it's really hard for them to move their schedule, right? Second thing, if you're not reinstating what they're getting from you, you think that they're mind readers, they're not, right? So, you have to remind them how far they've come, how close they are to their goal. "Oh, you've hit this goal, where are we at now?" You also need to actually... they talk so much, they are nonstop, they think you're their therapist. If you're not listening to the things they're saying they're going to go do with their family, "Oh, you're going to go hike such and such volcano in Europe? Okay, we're going to add some exercises in to make sure you can do that. Oh, you want to start running a marathon? Okay, we got to do these things to help keep your hips open, otherwise your back's going to hurt." You need to hear the things that they're saying they want to do with their kids, their family. You have to insert yourself. Julian Barnes 43:15  You have to listen. I'm hearing you say, 'Listen, listen.'Lesley Logan 43:17  And what do most teachers do? This is the thing, I say this, the industry is having an amazing moment right now, but I promise you, right now, because all the teachers are focused on cues, and all the students are focused on how many people are in the class, you are going to see the pendulum swing the other way. Because people are not there for your cues; they're there for the transformation. And if you're not looking with your eyes at what their body is doing, you don't know what cue you need. You have to see what they're doing, and then give them the correction that they need in that moment. And because we have different learning styles and things like that, you can't... I'm sorry, you can't have memorized cues. You have to learn how to be present, and be present to listen to what they're saying when they're leaving. What are they saying? "Oh, you know, my sister's coming to town next week." Guess what I'm saying: "Oh, is your sister coming with you to class? Do we need to reschedule your sessions?" Because if you can start to train them, then they're never missing, they're getting the consistency. But you have to know that their goals are going to change with their life. My clients, 12 years long, I mean, it's amazing what height we got out of them, and they're older. So I think it's really important for people to actually remember that the impact you want to make is there if you listen, and they'll stay because you keep reminding them how Pilates is part of their life.Julian Barnes 44:32  And so churn, to wrap it up, LTV and churn are related. You want your LTV to be high so they stay with you for many years, and you want to reduce your churn, which is the percentage of clients or members who leave your studio. What are some of the best practices that studio owners can implement to minimize churn?Lesley Logan 44:53  So, I think this is where, if your business is based off waitlists and 12-hour things, and hoping people cancel so they will get off the waitlist, you're actually going to have churn. I actually think this is where we have to really think about who we're trying to serve and how we're serving them. And I would really make sure that your clients are able to be part of the journey of the growth of your business. They should be part of it, celebrated, reminded that they're there. They always need to have a name. Every single person, whoever you hire, no matter how big you get, if they are not saying people's first names, and also following up, "Oh, you've been gone for two weeks because of X surgery. How are you doing? Yes, we paused your membership, but..." actually check on them. "Oh, I don't want to bother them." Oh my god, they won't respond if you're bothering them! We have to actually stick around and be in people's lives, and follow up and remind them that they matter and that they're missed. And if you have any teachers who are not remembering people's names and not remembering that they've been gone, you're going to have a churn problem. I think the reason why my businesses have grown, even in coaching people, and that we have people who've been with us since day one, is because we constantly remind everybody who the OG people were. These people are here; they've been with us for the long haul. They remembered us when it was small, but they're being introduced to the new people when it's bigger, and they're feeling that they're part of a community. I think people forget that people, at the base of everything, just want to belong. And if you're not able to look them in the eye and remember their name and introduce them to somebody else, they're going to feel unseen at some point. So I really do think that churn is reduced when you see people as a human being.Julian Barnes 46:27  So, I have a bonus question for you which is, right in your wheelhouse as a veteran instructor, more like a comment for you to reply to, from the very beginning of this conversation, you haven't used this word, but it's my takeaway of what you've been saying: impact. We talk about how people want transformation. Talk about how do you convert from lead to first-time visitor? How do you convert from first-time visitor to second purchase? How do you keep them a long time? How do you minimize churn? To me, the answer is impact, and what we, at BFS, don't focus on front of house, we're not Pilates instructors, but you obviously are. And so what I like to remind people, and I'm going to ask you to elaborate, I like to remind people none of the processes, none of the systems, none of the messaging, none of the stuff matters if you're not delivering fire classes each and every time. Agree, disagree, assess?Lesley Logan 47:29  Oh, I agree. I also think it's really interesting because I come from this as a classical Pilates instructor, but I coach a lot of contemporary-based Pilates. So my fire classes on the Reformer always start with footwork and probably end with the same exercise. So, when you say fire classes, I think it's really important that I say.Julian Barnes 47:47  I want to say impact. The classes have to deliver impact.Lesley Logan 47:50  Yeah, they have to. Well, I'm saying I'm agreeing with you. I'm also saying you don't have to be someone who's recreating the wheel every time, but people have to feel so different than when they walked in the door, because if they feel the same, then they're not coming back. This is a nice hobby that they have, you fit the thing, but as soon as road construction's up or their job goes across town, you're out of it. Here's what I know about being a teacher for so long in LA: people would drive across freeways to stay with the same teacher because of the impact. Why would they do that when there's a studio... it's LA! There are, and by the way, it's LA, like New York, the best Pilates instructors in the world are in these places, and they're going across town. Why? It is because of the impact. And I think this is where people lose their confidence: they see other people doing things and go, "Oh, I should do that, too. Everyone's Reformers are beige now; I should do beige. Everything is this." No. What is it that you said you would give people, and what is it that they want? And if you can stay clear on that and keep understanding what their new wants are, you will have them for life.Julian Barnes 48:59  This goes back to something you said earlier today: take one client and give everything to, say that again, you said?Lesley Logan 49:07  Take one client and you make them obsessed with you, and then you'll have clients for life.Julian Barnes 49:11  Okay, so unpack that, because I think you're talking about how do you make them obsessed. To me, that sounds like you're saying give them 110%, teach the best class every time, you are the best.Lesley Logan 49:38  It goes back to accountability. I'm going to give 110% in every session, but you have to show up for the sessions, and it's a two-way street, I'm not in your body, right? So you got to make sure that they feel like they can trust you to tell you what's going on, but they have to show up

It's Fuck Yeah Friday, and Lesley Logan is fired up. This week she's celebrating a big one: teaching over 300 people Pilates at Electric Daisy Carnival in 98-degree heat, something that scared her and thrilled her in equal measure. She gets honest about the nerves, the things weighing on all of us right now, and why you have to keep celebrating the good you're doing. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Lesley's relatable rant about apps that change without asking.The real reason your nervousness might be a good sign.Why having people in your corner actually matters.How celebrating wins changes how your whole week feels.A simple weekend mantra to carry you through hard days.Episode References/Links:@mymarialoisa - https://www.instagram.com/mymarialoisaEDC Las Vegas - https://www.electricdaisycarnival.comSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:48  Hey, Be It babe, welcome to your Fuck Yeah Friday. I'm a little fired up today, to be honest, a lot of things this year. So, let's get into it. If you're new to the Be It Pod, we do interviews and recaps on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I've been doing some more solo episodes, and you guys have been loving that, so we'll get more into that. If there's a topic I'm gonna do, you got to tell me, because I want to make sure these are fun for you. Then, on Fridays, I have an "I need a moment," I give a win, I share one of yours, and that is how we end our week, because my loves, if you are not celebrating the wins that you have in a week, it can just feel like everything is just really hard. Lesley Logan 1:21  So, my "I need a moment" and an "I need a moment" is something that we do in our communities for our eLevate members who are in our mentorship program and our Agency members who are in our business coaching program, and there's a channel where they get to rant, but they have to go share a win. So this is where I get to rant. So my rant is that everyone thinks that they should update their platforms without asking, "What do I want?" I was just going to do this work right now, and it took me six minutes to get started instead of the regular one, because my platform that I use is like, "Oh, we're gonna change your button note that tells you where all your work is. We're gonna hide it under those three dots, it's my work." I need it to be where it needs to be, a button where I can see it, and it's like, oh, there's a button where you can go, "Would you like to go back to your original profile?" Yeah, yeah, I would. Lesley Logan 2:11  And you know what I also don't like? My freaking tool that we use for projects, which I'm not gonna put on blast here, because we do love them, but I'm a little mad at them. You did this the same week that Slack also made updates, and Slack is like, "Oh, look at this new way of doing it here," as if it's easier. It's not. It's still showing me I have an unread thing, and I go to the unread, and I can't find it. So, my rant is that I should be the only reason why I'm behind, not the platforms, not the platforms. Okay, more to say on that, but I just feel like this is the elder millennial talking, right? Lesley Logan 2:44  My win is, okay, this is a big win, and normally our Fuck Yeah Fridays are little wins, but my win is, you guys, I taught over 300 people at the Electric Daisy Carnival! Yes, EDC, Las Vegas, they invited me to teach. I was so freaking nervous to do it. Over 300 people did it in 98 degrees under a tent with misters, and then they did a family photo, and it was just freaking me on. And my dream of more bodies doing Pilates is really coming true, because of course I love doing the conventions that we do, and things like that, but more importantly, I want non-teachers to get to do Pilates. That's why OPC exists. Of course we have lots of teachers who take on it, and you should, because it is a place for you to have your personal practice.Lesley Logan 3:26  But I really also want to do these big events where I'm going to people who have never done Pilates or have only heard of Pilates a little bit, and so it was just a massive win. And I looked so good. It's another win. My hair looked amazing, my outfit was amazing. If you hear a panting dog, that's our foster, Darla, so she'll be another win later on in the program. So, anyways, that's my win. I put myself on a big stage that scared the fuck out of me, and I loved it, and I can't wait to do it again. And there definitely are talks for next year. Lesley Logan 3:55  So now that we've celebrated me, actually, let me just put a little thing on that. You guys, you really should put yourself in situations that scare the fuck out of you. You should. The whole drive there, Brad's like, "Are you okay?" I'm like, "I'm really nervous right now. I'm so nervous because this is something I really care about. I really want to do a good job. I want to be asked back. I want these people to love the type of Pilates that I teach," which I think is really important and really good. "But I'm nervous that they're not going to like me, or that no one's gonna show, because it's so hot, and they put me on at 1 o'clock and it's so hot." And so we called my publicist, who's a dear friend, and we told her what we were doing, and she got appropriately excited, and started screaming, and getting so excited for me. So, thank you, Allison, for being you. I would just say, everyone, make sure that you have people in your corner that you can celebrate, or at least talk to when you're feeling a little nervous, because other people in my life are great, but I needed someone to get appropriately excited so that I could get out of my nervous energy and my nervous head. So, get that in your life, right? That might be another win. It's scary, but it's good. Lesley Logan 4:53  Okay, your win. But, anyways, yeah, go be a beginner. All right, so this is also on the same theme. @mymarialoisa, she said, "I'm beginning classical Pilates instructor training with Lesley Logan, dream come true." Have to find out in the next episode what that means. All right, loves, as you know, we must do a mantra. Also, you should send your wins in, send your wins in, because @mymarialoisa is going to hear this on a day that she's probably stressed out about that program that she's doing with me, and you need to hear a win that you had in the past, so you can go, "Oh, I'm doing new things, I can do hard things. I had a win a couple weeks ago, so this day is going to be better," because, oh my god, life is really fucking hard, isn't it hard? It's hard. There's a lot going on. Lesley Logan 5:36  I was just talking to my, I'm just gonna ramble for a second before I give you your mantra. I saw my client this morning, and she's like, "How is everything going? How's Electric Daisy Carnival?" And I told her how great it was, because she's been to it and she loves it, and so we're talking about it, and I was like, "Yeah, it was so fun." And then, Ebola is out on outbreak. There's all these things going on, so it's really important that we take a moment to celebrate the things we are doing, because there is a lot for our nervous system to deal with on a daily basis, and you are doing good things, so I love that, Maria. Thank you for sending your win in. You can send your wins in to the beitpod.com/questions. You can also send in topics you want me to do two or more episodes on, my opinion, things like that. Lesley Logan 6:18  Your mantra for the weekend is: I'm a source of kindness to myself. I am a source of kindness to myself. You are a source of kindness to yourself, my love. My love, share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Send your wins in, go celebrate yours, tag me in your wins if you want to do that. That's super fun. I want to celebrate you. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.Lesley Logan 6:37  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 7:20  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 7:25  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 7:29  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 7:36  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 7:40  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Yuichiro Umehara has had one of the most impressive transformations as a singer in the past decade. Originally lacking confidence, he's evolved into a singer who steals the show if needed, going toe to toe with some of the best singers without disappearing in the mix. This was something we couldn't say a couple of years back but now, Umehara has managed to consistently impress with Sir Vanity, SolidS, Beit and BAD SKUNK.Music suggestions:- SolidS "Cross x Notes"- Sir Vanity "Home"- BAD SKUNK "Cheeky Girl"Thanks to M L for inspiring this series of episodes!

In part two of the Messy Action series, Lesley Logan reframes messy action as something you reach for first, not a backup plan or a last resort. She explains why holding out for the right conditions quietly keeps you stuck, and what it really takes to move forward when you cannot see every step ahead. Lesley also shares honest stories about how small daily practices helped her push past fears and grow her Pilates business. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Acting ‘as if' filters your choices through who you want to be.How starting with 25% of the plan beats waiting for perfection.Lesley's messy studio opening and why clients loved the evolution.The power of smaller steps and running a nervous system check.Why building a small win stack keeps your momentum going daily.Episode References/Links:The As If Principle by Richard Wiseman - https://a.co/d/0b99DSxoEp. 694 Stuck Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep694Ep. 695 Stuck Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep695Ep. 613 Habit Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep613Ep. 614 Habit Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep614Ep. 616 Habit Series 3 - https://beitpod.com/ep616Ep. 617 Habit Series 4 - https://beitpod.com/ep617Ep. 619 Habit Series 5 - https://beitpod.com/ep619Ep. 620 Habit Series 6 - https://beitpod.com/620Ep. 622 Habit Series 7 - https://beitpod.com/ep622Ep. 623 Habit Series 8 - https://beitpod.com/623Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Messy action isn't what you do when you don't know what you're doing, it's how you figure it out. Lesley Logan 0:04  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:47  All right, Be It babe. Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we do take messy action, and after 700 episodes, I hit my elbow on the thing, so I think that's perfect for the topic today. Because, my goodness, if you think you're supposed to be perfect after 700 episodes, you are mistaken, because you are a human being. I'm a human being, and we are all over here just trying to do the best we can. And if that's all you take away from this episode, that is enough. But we are on our messy action theme. So, on Tuesday, if you didn't listen to that episode we talked about stuck and how that can affect you taking action. Then we had a theme two or three weeks ago, maybe more, on what's keeping you stuck, and so the reality is that there's a lot of different things that keep us stuck, and we are often the reason why. We are often the one that gets in our own way. We blame it on other people, but it's typically usually us. It's our nervous system, it's our protection mode, it's our fear of responsibility, failure, judgment, all the things. So I want to talk about how messy action is a strategy. It's not just throwing things to the wall and seeing what sticks, although that can be it. It's actually more of a mantra to get you to take the first next step. So it's not a backup plan, it's not a last resort. I really think that's important to say, because most plans don't go the way that you expect, but if you have this idea that it doesn't have to be perfect, I just have to keep the next step going, then you will actually realize that you're not on a plan B or C. You're just working the first plan and following it with the momentum that it's getting, following the flow of the river. If a river hits a rock, it doesn't go, "Oh, I must stop." It goes around the rock, right? It goes on the next thing. It creates. It creates the Grand Canyon, so we keep going where it wants to go. So truly, messy action is the way forward. I love this: messy action isn't what you do when you don't know what you're doing, it's how you figure it out. It's not what you do when you don't know what you're doing, it's how you figure it out. So, instead of us reframing it like, "I don't know what to do here, so let's just throw this at the wall and see what happens," no, no, I gotta figure out what I gotta do, so let me try this over here. It's an experiment, right? If you skip ahead to the lovely intro, I like to listen to the intro on 1.5 speed, I'm not gonna lie, I like music that fast, but be it till you see it is identity through action, that's what it is. It's acting as if. There's a really good book called The As If Principle, and so if you act as if, then someday you will just become the as, the person, who you want to be, because you're practicing being that person. You're filtering things and decisions through the person you want to be. What would that person do if I was already that person? As opposed to waiting, which we already talked about in the last episode, how waiting is exhausting, it's annoying, it's frustrating. So messy action is really just normalizing imperfection.Lesley Logan 3:22  It means starting with 50% or 25% of the plan in mind. You know what the destination is, you don't really know the steps right before it, but you know that if you take these steps right here, you might get there. It's kind of like when they went off to see the Wizard. They're like, "It's that way," and they didn't know that there was a forest of apples and a bunch of monkeys that they were going to, but they could see it in the distance, and they could see the road right in front of them, and that's what they did. That's what starting with messy action is. It is posting before you think that the post is actually perfect, because I'll actually tell you that social media doesn't care if it's perfect. It's actually a waste of time, just put things up there. It is learning in real time. You get to be a learner. I'm still learning Pilates, and I've been teaching it for 20 years. I'm still learning. It's trying things out and adjusting as you have more information. That's taking messy action. Because having the perfect plan, let me tell you, things change. We taught at EDC. Let me tell you how much of that they had figured out to the T, who has what radio, who has what wristband, which wristband can go with what. Everything was well thought out, and then the weather sends it over 100 degrees. Okay, we've got misters. All right. Oh, now the weather is going to be 56 degrees, and the wind is going to go freaking crazy. You can plan everything to a T, and then the wind blows. So it's actually learning in real time. Okay, what can I do? What can I do? What can I do? We always talk about how if you want to support this podcast, you should be an OPC member. At OPC, we actually tell you it's brave and courageous to replace what you can't do yet with something you can do, and in doing that, you're constantly asking yourself, "Okay, what can I do? What can I do? What can I do? I can't do this, what can I do instead?" When you have that as a muscle in your brain, it allows you to take messy action more quickly, more easily, and just try it out. Oh, that was actually too hard for you today. Oh, that was actually exactly what I needed. Great, now you know. Messy action is not being reckless, it's being real. It's doing what needs to be done right now, and it definitely gets ruined if you're trying to be perfect. Lesley Logan 5:20  So, okay, I've told this story before, but I don't think I've told it in this context, and maybe you're new and you haven't heard it. In 2018, early 2018, I realized I needed to open my own studio. I never thought I would, didn't really want to. I liked the freedom of renting, but that freedom was getting hampered because the studio was getting busier, and so for me to film and record my tutorials, I had to go later and later at night. I don't like the evening. I was having a hard time recording at home because, one, I only had room for the mat, and two, they were doing construction all day long. And it was just really annoying to constantly move our furniture around in our studio apartment so I could film, and I wanted to add reformer classes. So if I wanted to add reformer classes, I needed to open my own studio. So I thought I had this perfect plan. I knew the location I wanted. I ordered the equipment that I wanted. I had the perfect move-in date. I told the studio that was being run by some friends of mine when I was going to leave. I was like, "Let me stay until it's time, till my equipment arrives." And guess what? I didn't get to wait till my equipment arrived. They didn't like that, and so luckily I had the keys to the space. We had hung some stuff on the wall, and I texted all of my clients, "Hey, we're going to be here tomorrow, starting tomorrow. This is so exciting. Here's where you're going to come."Lesley Logan 6:38  And on the first day, I didn't have a trash can, didn't even have a trash can for them. They're like, "Where do I put this paper towel?" And I'm like, "Oh yeah, right over there, just in that box. I'm gonna go get a trash can on my next break." I also borrowed a Reformer from a friend, and I borrowed a Ped-O-Pull from a friend. I was just asking people, like, "Hey, what extra things do you have while I wait for my stuff to show up?" And then every day, Brad and I would try to put the studio more and more together, hit a Bed Bath & Beyond up with my coupons, and got the things that I needed. Got a fan, got a trash can, waited for a chair to come, it took forever, so it was frustrating, because I wanted my clients to move into this perfect studio. Guess what? They actually loved being part of the evolution. They actually thought it was fun to see every time they came in what new things we've done to the studio, what new equipment had arrived, what pieces had arrived. And so, yeah, I was embarrassed that I wasn't able to finish out my time at the other studio, but if I had let that drive the decisions I was making, I would not have been able to see what delight my clients took in being part of the journey, being part of the creation, letting me know, "Oh, I like that over there. Oh, actually, let's put that. Have you tried that over there?" It was so fun to let them help me decorate, so it was actually one of the coolest things that ever happened. And I'm really grateful, because my clients actually got really excited about the Ped-O-Pull because they had to use the Ped-O-Pull for 30 minutes, because that's all we had. It was just a lot of fun, and I would have missed out on that memory and that challenge, and how it made my brain have to force itself to be creative in that situation. Lesley Logan 8:13  So, how do you do that? What would help you take messy action? Well, make the next step smaller. Can you do it in two minutes? Make it one step only, so it's not like, "Oh, I got to build my website with messy action." No, I need to order, buy the URL. Okay, I need to look at platforms where I can run a website. Okay, I need to choose a platform that I like. Oh, actually, before I do that, I need to compare the platforms, right? Like, what do I want them to do? Don't put "build your website" on your daily tasks, because that's too overwhelming. Can I make it fun, right? For my ADHD people: put music on, add movement to it, set a timer. I love a timer. I have a little kitchen timer on my desk, and it's really helpful for me when I'm feeling stuck and I just need to take action. I'm like, "Okay, I only have to work on this for the next 15 minutes," right? And that really helps me just get going, because I only have 15 minutes, so I'm just gonna do the best I can. I would also say remove the planning loops. You probably have planned enough already. Take the first step in your plan, but if taking an action just feels too big, it's because it's too big, right? So, you got to make it as small as possible. Go back to our habit series if you want to understand what that means and why that's important. Especially for my people who need the dopamine high to keep going, gotta make it small, gotta make it achievable. The other thing I would just say is make sure you're doing nervous system checks. You know, are you breathing? You start to hold your breath while you're thinking about doing something. There's a lot of fear that we got to breathe through. It's gonna be really hard to take action if we are holding our breath. And if your nervous system is feeling overloaded, overwhelmed, say it out loud. It's really, really helpful. Like, Brad and I will be working on something, and sometimes I'm like, "Oh my god, I'm just having, I'm actually scared, I'm having too much emotion around this right now," and it really does help to call that out, and to go, "Okay." Because why am I doing that? What's the fear that I'm having there? Is the fear that I'm having around this because I have a fear of responsibility, fear of judgment, fear of failure? Okay, so what is coming up? Because a lot of times it's just stuff that's in our head from our past experiences, or the way we were raised, and we can get in our own way when those things didn't even exist. We just made a story up. So it's really important that you're doing a nervous system check, that you have people around you that you can go, "Hey, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed right now. Can I tell you what's going on?" And their job is not to be like, "Oh, you're fine." Their job is to go, "Sure, what's going on?" And then not give you 17 pieces of advice. It's to remind you to take messy action, and you can do this, right? I was having a little anxiety getting ready for something. I talked about this in an FYF. My husband's like, "Oh, let's call these people," and I was like, "Absolutely not. Those people are not going. I love those people. They're great people. Those people are not going to make me feel better in this situation. They're going to make me feel more nervous. So, who else can we call?" So, he called someone else who screamed with joy and exclamation, which really got me out of my head, right? So, maybe the first thing you do for your messy action is write down who do you call when you need a reminder to take messy action. So this is a hopefully good reminder. You're not forcing yourself into action, you are supporting yourself into action. Not forcing yourself into messy action, you are supporting yourself into messy action. Lesley Logan 11:33  Well, you know, at this podcast we really love to celebrate little wins, right? Sometimes I have a big win that we share, but typically they're like we're in the process of something, and so what's really important for me to help you understand when it comes to messy action, you have to build momentum, which means having a small win stack. So every single day, what did you do that day that we can celebrate? Because if we're waiting until you finish the project, like for example, building the website, we're gonna be waiting for a fucking long time, six to eight weeks at least, right? Longer if you don't know what you're doing, so how can we be like, "I bought the URL," and make that super fun, and take people on the journey so they can share with you? The momentum is built in moments, not masterpieces. And so, yes, it's really beautiful to look at the sculpture when it's done, but mostly sculptures take years to do, and if artists only celebrated when it was done, that's not the best way. I would say they need to celebrate along the way, because it makes them enjoy the process. You're gonna enjoy the process more. So, this whole podcast is about being it until you see it, and the only way to be it until you see it is to act as if, which means you're not gonna know how to do it perfectly, because you're not her yet. You're being it until you see it to be who that person is. You don't know who it is, you're guessing, and so the only way that we can do that is to take the messy action, take some action, because it's the antidote to fear, it's how we get clarity. And if you really do think about, if you really do embody, be it till you see it, then you would be asking yourself, "Okay, the version of me that I want to be, what would they be doing right now?" Well, they would be doing this thing. Okay, then I go do that thing. They wouldn't be scared of that, right?Lesley Logan 13:05  For example, I remember when I was first starting the brands, and I was just getting really overwhelmed by all that I had to do, all the decisions I had to make, and I heard this person say, "CEOs don't put out every fire, they know which fires to put out." And I was like, "Oh, I'm the CEO of this company." I'm not now, thank God, I am the Chief Pilates Officer, the CVO, Chief Visionary Officer, but at the time I was the only employee for the company, and I was like, "Okay, I'm not supposed to put out every fire, I'm supposed to know which fires to put out. So if I was a CEO, what fires would I know are the ones to put out?" And just by acting like I knew what I was doing, I was like, "Oh, it's this one over here," right? That's it. That's the thing. So you're just gonna keep practicing what this whole podcast is about, be it till I see it. Ask that version of you, what would she do? What action would she take? She wouldn't be getting in her own way, you know that. And here's the deal: every time you take action, you actually prove to yourself that you can do it. You teach yourself what's possible, and that's how you build confidence. It's not by waiting. We do not build confidence through waiting. In fact, we actually chip away at our confidence every time we delay taking action on the thing we want to do. We do. It's how it works. It's how it works. So, my loves, now that we know you're not stuck, and we know you're not unmotivated, and we know you're not behind, you've just been waiting to feel ready, waiting with a little fear, waiting until things are perfect. But we're not doing that anymore, because the be it till you see it version of you would take the messy action. Lesley Logan 13:51  So, I want to know which action you're going to take. What's your first next step? Send it in to the beitpod.com/questions. Send in what you're needing more advice and support on when it comes to be it till you see it. What's a topic or an expert you need to hear from to help you know what next steps to take? What's another subject we could do a solo episode on? You ask me, we'll create it for you. That's what this podcast is all about, because I'm here to help you be it till you see it, because that's what I'm working on. We're all in this together. You're not alone. So send this to a friend who needs to hear it. And until next time, say it with me, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 15:16  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 15:59  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 16:03  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 16:08  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 16:15  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 16:18  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Learn a halacha of Rambam in-depth from a variety of noted Torah scholars, who delve deeper into words of the Rambam to understand them in the context of the other sources and commentaries.

Learn a halacha of Rambam in-depth from a variety of noted Torah scholars, who delve deeper into words of the Rambam to understand them in the context of the other sources and commentaries.

Learn a halacha of Rambam in-depth from a variety of noted Torah scholars, who delve deeper into words of the Rambam to understand them in the context of the other sources and commentaries.

Feeling ready is a myth, and waiting for it quietly keeps your dreams stuck. In Part 1 of this two-part series on messy action, Lesley Logan unpacks why so many of us stall before we start and what fear is really doing underneath the surface. She blends personal stories with practical honesty about beginning before everything feels in place. If you have been waiting to feel ready, this episode is your nudge to start. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Feeling ready is a myth that keeps you procrastinating.The hidden fears that quietly keep you stuck.Why ADHD makes you freeze and the simple fix that helps.Perfect timing is an illusion and the 2020 move that proves itTaking one brave step without blowing up your life.Episode References/Links:Ep. 694 Stuck Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep694Ep 3 with Rob Mack - https://beitpod.com/ep3Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  When you wait and you're afraid to take action, it does make you feel safe, but waiting keeps your dreams safe, and also keeps them stuck, which means it keeps you stuck. Lesley Logan 0:12  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:54  All right, be it, babe. How are you? Oh my gosh, welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast. This week, instead of an interview, it's me. Both episodes, we're actually talking about messy action, and we love messy action around here, because it's in the intro. If you're new to our podcast, sometimes we have interviews and recaps, and lately we've been adding these solo episodes in, and hopefully you're liking them. We'd love to hear topics that you want us to have interviews on, or that you want us to get some solo episodes on, if you want to hear my opinion on things, stories, things like that. That's why we're doing this, because people asked. So, here's the deal. I'm a recovering perfectionist and overachiever, and that means that I try to do things way before I'm ready, but I didn't used to be that way. I used to be someone who had to make sure everything was in perfect order before I would do the thing, which actually just meant that I was honestly procrastinating, because the reality is feeling ready is a myth. In fact, oftentimes when we feel ready, it's because the thing we want to do is no longer scary, because it's no longer we're the only one doing it. In fact, other people are doing it so much now, I just feel safe. And then it's like, well, do we miss our boat? Do we miss our chance? And the arguments would be that, no, you should just do the thing because you're the only person who can do what you do the way you want to do it, but if you're waiting to feel ready, you'll be waiting a long time, and then really we've missed the opportunity to do the thing, because there are lessons that we will learn in our quest to feel ready to actually get there. And so to be honest, we know ready is a myth, and we also know that if readiness was required, no one would ever begin, because being a beginner is scary. And when we see people who are beginners, we see them make mistakes, and we don't go, "Oh, what a beginner." We're like, "Oh my god, look at them doing that thing," right? So we have to have that same grace for ourselves, and no one truly ever feels 100% ready. It's hard, because on social media these days everyone looks like everything's curated and perfectly ready, but everyone's actually scared. Everyone's doing things as they go, and they just make it look like it's ready to go, but inside, nothing's ever ready. We just launched something today, and the link works for some people and not others. That doesn't mean we wouldn't prepare like a fuck ton, but weird things happen. Little tech gremlins get in there, so I just share that with you, because it's so easy to look at other people going, "Oh my god, they have it all together. So, when they start something new, of course, it's ready to go." No, everyone is doing the best they can, and then you won't actually know that things are ready to go until you get out there and you do it, and so you may as well just take the messy action, because you'll learn the most in the first place.Lesley Logan 3:28  Now, a few weeks back, we had a series on being stuck, and I find a lot of people are stuck because they actually are wanting to do something, but they're waiting to feel ready. In that series we talked about motivation isn't the problem, it's this: we feel stuck because we're not moving forward towards the thing we want to do, but we're not moving forward because we don't feel ready, and we put ourselves in this position, and we actually make it on our brain that we have to have motivation to get ready. I heard someone say we'd be ready to be ready, and I don't even know if that's possible. We have to be willing to be imperfect and to take an action based on the information that we have, and then reflect, correct, and continue, right? So take the first step and reflect and correct and continue. I'm thinking of one of our very first guests, he's like, "You're never going to see the top of the stair, but you could see the first one, and then when you take the first step, you'll actually see the second step." And that's kind of how everyone does it. Everyone does it, right? I have recently talked about how I have a teacher training program that I'm creating, and I've never created a teacher training program before. I've taught them, I've seen others, I've never created my own, and it's hard. And I like going, "Oh, I don't like how this is not organized," but to be honest, I have to move forward with the beta group, because the only way I'm organized in the right flow is to try to put it in a flow, right? That's the only way. Lesley Logan 4:42  So, anyways, a lot of people also wait. I just want to say, if you are waiting to feel ready, oftentimes it's a protection thing, right? You have a fear of judgment, fear of failure, fear of success, a lot of different fears, fear of responsibility. Oh my god, what if it does work out? What if the teacher training program I am really excited about does work out? What kind of responsibility do I have now? Sometimes we have a fear of that, so then we make up reasons and excuses why we're not ready to move forward, because that fear is legitimate. It's totally real, and so I think it also just comes back to what your nervous system feels safe doing. Some people feel safe flying by the seat of their pants, and some people don't feel safe that way. And what? Look, it's a human need to need certainty, and that things are going to work out. It's also a human need to need uncertainty, and have surprises and experiments. So just know that you need both of those things. A lot of times we're protecting ourselves, that fear of judgment, what people think if I fail, and so, honestly, if you don't start, then you can't fail, right? But also, if you don't start something, then there's parts of you, the potential, the be it till you see it you, that also doesn't get to happen, and everything is moving forward, so you have to, as well, right? I think when you wait and you're afraid to take action, it does make you feel safe, but waiting keeps your dreams safe, and also keeps them stuck, which means it keeps you stuck. Lesley Logan 6:16  The other reason that you could be afraid of taking messy action is, hello, my ADHD ladies, lots of ideas, no clear place to start, and you end up in a freeze space until something motivates you, and you end up in this focus mode that's just amazing to do. And so then the reality is you shouldn't label yourself as stuck because you're just overloaded, like you're overwhelmed. I do have a thing for this, so if I have an idea, I put an idea on this parking lot. It's on a big Post-it on the back of my door, and if I look at it the next day and I know what it is, then I can keep working on it. And if I look at it the next day and I don't know what it is, and I'm not as excited, I don't.Lesley Logan 6:57  There's a 24-hour rule with ADHD people, because we are dopamine seekers, and I will say that if you have ADHD, there is a good chance you are going to be good at taking messy action because of the dopamine kick, but also because you have so many ideas, you could get stuck, or you could use other ideas to distract you from the thing that you're really wanting to do, because you don't feel ready. So, look at that, ADHD is its own conundrum, but overwhelm is real, and I want to acknowledge that, because I don't want you walking away from this episode going, "Oh, I'm supposed to do this when I don't feel ready, but I have all these other things." No, there might be several reasons why you're feeling stuck and afraid to take messy action, and so we have to unravel like an onion. What's the thing that's keeping you stuck? What's the thing that's keeping you from taking the first step forward to see if you like the thing? Sometimes you have ideas on things you want to do or be, and if you don't actually start working on it, you might not realize that you don't like it. I've done some things I was really, really proud of at the time, and then the longer we do it, the more I'm like, I'm not really into this anymore. I want to make changes, but if I had never taken the messy action in the first place, I would always go, "Oh, someday I wish I'd done that thing." Well, now that I have more information, I'm glad I did the thing, and I'm glad it's leading me over here. And so I would just say your dreams will be more curated and more unique to you and more supportive to you when you take the messy action. Lesley Logan 8:22  Another reason why a lot of people are afraid to take messy action is the perfect timing illusion. I'll start when... and here's the deal, there's no perfect timing. It's like that whole joke that you make a plan and then God laughs. I remember in 2019 Brad and I being in Las Vegas and really having a good time in the downtown area arts district, which is really close to our house now, and we're like, "Wow, we could really live here. Wow." And we had friends who owned homes there, and we're like, "We could own a home in Las Vegas, that is crazy. We should do that in 2022 or 2023. In fact, let's make sure that as we finish out what we planned for 2020, we are keeping in mind what we want to do in 2022 and 2023." Great. So then what happened in 2020? Yeah, we ended up moving to Vegas, because that was the perfect timing. Could you imagine if we stuck with our plan? No, we took the messy action. We moved. I mean, the reality is everyone took messy action in 2020 because that's what you had to do. That was the only option, right? So, I hope that that story helps you, because yeah, it's good to have a plan. It's good to do your research, and then sometimes you have to just move before you're ready. If you're feeling stuck, I get it, but it's just really a lack of movement. It's a lack of taking a step. Action does bring clarity and is the antidote to fear. It's why it's in the intro of the show. It's so funny that we're doing this episode after 700 episodes, because the reality is the intro is this episode. We often say, "I feel stuck," but really, let's leave the emotion and look more at a reality of are we just taking a step forward? Have we done one thing towards the thing we want to do? Especially for my ADHD people, sometimes we just need to start with one thing, and then it is the domino effect that we're looking for, right? And I will say, for my overthinkers, it's really easy to try to think your way forward, but you got to move your way forward. Action is more than what's in your mind. It's a physical embodiment. It's something that you do with your feet and your hands.Lesley Logan 10:25  It's sending the email, it's making the phone call, it's buying the URL, it's hiring the thing, it's exploring, it's doing the research, right? Do the research. I want to say, I get it. I get also the comfort in feeling stuck, and it's actually kind of comfortable, because then you always have a reason for why you haven't moved forward. If you have a reason, then you can't fail. But I also want you to know, it's one step at a time always. Being it till you see it is one step at a time. Messy action is one step at a time. I'm not saying blow everything up, right? My goodness, I think I've talked about this on the podcast before, but it took me a year to break up with a relationship I had before Brad. A year, because I was like, "Well, it's not the right time, I don't have the amount of money." And that's right, I couldn't blow my life up a year before. I did not have the situation to land on, so I worked. I tried to figure that out. I worked on the relationship and tried to figure out what I would do if the relationship didn't exist. I got myself ready to be ready, and then I kind of blew it up a little bit, but I did some messy action, but I didn't blow it up completely, because I had a landing pad. I will just say, don't punish yourself, don't harp on yourself. If you have been like, "Oh my god, Lesley called me out. I've been waiting to be ready for two years now. I've wasted all this time." No, you haven't. You have gotten more clarity, and this episode is hitting you when you need to hear it, that you are like, "Oh my god, okay, I'm gonna do the thing, I'm gonna take the messy action." Messy action is one step, it's not 20 steps, it's one, it's one. So, if waiting to take messy action, waiting to take action has been keeping you stuck, and we're acknowledging that now, and we're on the same page now, then the real question is how do we actually start moving forward, especially when you don't feel ready? So we're going to dive in deeper to how to start moving forward in our next episode, because we're keeping these bite-sized. We are, and I hope that that is helpful, because it's nice to have an hour-and-a-half-long episode that's inspiring, and of course I want you inspired, but also it's nice to have a bite-sized episode that just goes, "Oh my god, I have been living in fear, making excuses, researching myself to death, waiting to feel ready, and now I know I just need to take a next step." So, on Thursday, we're gonna talk about how to do that and dive in deeper. So, I would love to hear more about what you've been wanting to do. What have you been waiting to feel ready to do? That could be a first next step in getting your momentum going. Share it with the Be It Pod. Send it into the beitpod.com/questions. Let us know this is the episode that inspired you, and let us know what your win is. Your win could just be like, "I listened to this episode and I am ready to feel ready." Thank you so much. Send this to a friend who's feeling stuck. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 13:14  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 13:57  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 14:02  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 14:06  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 14:13  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 14:17  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this Fuck Yeah Friday episode, Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach, rolls out a fresh take on the FYF format, you can name what is hard and still claim a win in the same breath. She shares the messy reality behind working for yourself, celebrates listener wins, and reflects on fostering her first dog solo during a packed travel season. It is a short, energizing reminder that a hard moment and a real win can live side by side. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The revamped FYF format pairs an honest hard moment with a win.Lesley's need a moment about recording her own episodes.How a Lesley's win proves the busy schedule excuse doesn't hold.Getting rid of internet inspiration that isn't inspiring right now.Celebrating the interview process instead of waiting to get the job.Episode References/Links:@meganslatteryyogaandpilates - https://www.instagram.com/meganslatteryyogaandpilates@mymarialoisa - https://www.instagram.com/mymarialoisaSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:48  Hey, Be It Babe, welcome to our Friday episode. And this is our FYF episode, our fuck yeah. It's Friday, and Brad and I decided that we wanted to make some changes to the FYF episode, and one of those things is we're incorporating more of what we do in our communities, like we do with our agency members and our Elevate grads and our Elevate members, which is just you're allowed to need a moment, but you have to have a win in the exact same moment. So you can't come in here and all over everybody with your need a moment, you have to actually have a win to go with it, right? So that's how we're going to do that. I'll have, or Brad will have, or we'll get some guests to have when we want to complain about, and then they'll have a win, and then we'll share your wins that you send in telling that, and then if you want, I guess you could also send in your I need a moment and your wins. Lesley Logan 1:30  So here's my I need a moment, because it's happening right now. My internet is freaking amazing, it's amazing, I have the best internet, and when I come into my pod room, I'll have the best internet, and then I hit record, and it's like, actually, your internet's crap in this moment. Now it's crap, and it's just so annoying, because it's like, well, I only have one hour to do this thing, and I'm spending 17 minutes trying to figure out why my great internet is bad in this one spot at this one moment. That's my first world problems right now. My win is that I've been able to start doing something I've been wanting to do, which is foster dogs, which is not easy to do, because I have a dog, not easy to do, because I love them, and I want to keep them all, all the dogs, and also I travel a ton. And so back in April into May, I got to foster my first dog, and I did it by myself, which is really cool, because I have always had dogs, but I've had dogs with family or partners, and so it's just there's someone else who can do the thing with the dog. And so for nine days I was responsible for a dog by myself, and not a small dog, like a big one, and so my win is that I nailed it. I did everything I could to get this dog adopted, a family to be seen as just this wonderful addition to anyone's family, and I had the best time, all while keeping with my crazy busy schedule. So, you know what that means? It means we all can do this. So, anyway, that's my win.Lesley Logan 2:56  Now, for our next segment, we got rid of the inspiration from the internet, because I'll just be really honest, the internet is not very inspiring right now. So, your wins, here we go. We got two from you guys. @meganslatteryyogaandpilates said, hosting second soft launch in my house/home studio/big sale today. Tired, but doing it. And it's like, yeah, look, here's the deal. Working for yourself does not mean it's easy. I don't know why people think that if it's hard they must be doing it wrong. No, if it's hard and you're tired, you're probably doing it pretty darn good. Now you know you got to sleep and do some other things, but it's possible. Lesley Logan 3:30  Okay, next win is by @mymarialoisa. Interview for my dream job and sign up for the OPC training. Ah, that's so fun. We had such a good time with that training, so super, super proud about that. And I'm so glad that you got to join us, and that was one of your wins, and you got to interview for your dream job. You know what, I love that you celebrated the interview process, Maria Luisa, because so many people would just celebrate, like, wait for them to get the job, or then have a moment, because they might not have, but you celebrated the interview. Yeah, that's how we be it till we see it, babes. That is how we do it.Lesley Logan 4:05  And then we end our FYFs with a mantra. So here we go. And the win is not that my internet is great right now. That is not it. The mantra is not, I have great internet. Here's what it is, self love comes to me naturally. Self love comes to me naturally, self love comes to you naturally, Be it babe. Yes it does. Yes, it does. And if it doesn't, you just say that 17 times until you believe it, until you do it, because thoughts are not facts, but since so many of us make them, then change your thoughts, so you can change your facts, and self-love will come to you naturally. Lesley Logan 4:40  All right, babe. That's our episode for this Friday. We keep them short and sweet. If you want something longer and you want something to be more in depth, make sure you're checking out our series that we're releasing every other week, and our interviews and recaps. We've got lots of good stuff for you. We also have some really fun things we're highlighting when it comes to our recap special. So ways for you to get involved and help, because sometimes it feels like we're not doing enough, right? You might be like, oh, she fostered a dog, what am I doing? Well, listen to the recap episodes, because we highlight a charity that you too can work with. So until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 5:13  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 5:55  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 6:00  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 6:05  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 6:12  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 6:15  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this recap, Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell unpack the deeper implications of Adrian Starks' conversation on purpose, grief, and the resistance that comes from fighting your own path. They explore how purpose isn't something you find, but something you actively build, and why the attempt to force alignment often backfires. The episode tackles the unglamorous realities of change, self-reflection, and what happens when perfection gets in the way of progress. Whether you're struggling with imposter syndrome or questioning your direction, this conversation invites you to reclaim agency over your own story. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How supporting LGBTQ+ communities strengthens your own alignment and values.The importance of taking control of your purpose before it gets defined for you.Why the more effort you put into controlling something, the more it slips through your fingers.How self-reflection reveals when you're outgrowing something or being called into something newImposter syndrome shows up when you're going against the grain of your purpose.Episode References/Links:OPC for 40 days for $40 - opc.me/40eLevate 2028 Waitlist - lesleylogan.co/elevateOPC Flashcards - opc.me/flashcardsSummer Tour (Powered by Balanced Body) - opc.me/tourPrism Foundation - arprismfoundation.orgAdrian Starks Website - https://adrianstarks.comEp 191. with Adrian Starks - https://beitpod.com/ep191100 Acts of Love by Kim Hamer - https://a.co/d/0dugkBGkEp 244 with Kim Hamer - https://beitpod.com/ep244Ep 235 with Krista St-Germain - https://beitpod.com/ep235Ep. 688 Outgrowing Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep688 Ep. 689 Outgrowing Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep689Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Brad Crowell 0:00  We think purpose is just going to find us, and we're gonna be like, "Oh my god, that's what I'm here for, that's the thing," right? Instead, what clearly seems actionable is purpose is something that we are out there doing, and whether or not we chose to do it, we're still out there doing it.Lesley Logan 0:21  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:04  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap, where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the purposeful convo I had with Adrian Starks in our last episode. You know what, I think that's what we said the first time he was on, because his podcast is all about being purposeful, so if you haven't yet listened to that interview, you can pause this and go listen to that one.Brad Crowell 1:23  What is he like? 190-something?Lesley Logan 1:26  It was like 151. Brad's gonna look it up and... and you can then come back and listen to this one, or you can listen to this one, because we chat about a bunch of stuff, and then our favorite things. And then you can go listen to the amazing one, because you have all the choice in this world. You get to do what you want to do, and we got to meet a bunch of you amazing podcast listeners when we were in Arizona the other day.Brad Crowell 1:46  It was 191.Lesley Logan 1:47  191Brad Crowell 1:48  Yes, I can't believe.Lesley Logan 1:50  Wow, nailed it.Brad Crowell 1:51  I did.Lesley Logan 1:52  I don't even know. You must have cheated. You must have seen it.Brad Crowell 1:55  I heard it in the episode.Lesley Logan 1:56  You heard it in the episode.Brad Crowell 1:59  Because I went back and listened to it. Lesley Logan 2:00  I was like I love you, but there's no way you came up with that on your own. Anyways, we met a bunch of listeners at the POT Arizona last month.Brad Crowell 2:10  We sure did.Lesley Logan 2:11  I love that you love the pod, and also I heard that people are loving the solo episodes. If that's the case, please leave a review and tell me what you want me to talk about. Also, another way you can support this show is to become an OPC member, because when you're an OPC member, that money also supports this podcast. Just be honest, so the best thing you can do is to go be a member of OPC. One, you actually get extra stuff out of it. If you like these little pep talks that I do on the podcast that are solo, at the end of every one of my classes, I give you a little pep talk. It's not a mantra, but it's something close. So you can go to opc.me/40, and then you can join OPC for 40 days for $40, and then you can see how great we are. Okay, today is June 25, 2026. It's Bourdain Day.Brad Crowell 3:00  It's Bourdain Day, and this is.Lesley Logan 3:02  A quote from Mr. Anthony Bourdain: "If I'm an advocate for anything, it's to move as far as you can, as much as you can, across the ocean or simply across the river, walk in someone else's shoes, or at least eat their food. It's a plus for everybody." Anthony Bourdain backed up his words with action, all the while urging us to do a lot more than simply try new foods in exotic places with fascinating strangers. He desperately wanted us to break out of our comfort zones and see the world in person through the eyes of people we would never otherwise meet. Watching his TV shows, first No Reservations, and then Parts Unknown, enabled us to spend time with the real-life explorer who trotted around the world in search of, well, the things that make us all human: food, yes, but also love, spirit, and passion. Bourdain, who suffered from depression, took his own life in 2018 at the age of 61. "Anthony was my best friend," tweeted French chef and close friend Eric Ripert at the time. "Exceptional human being, so inspired and generous." Ripert, along with another longtime friend, José Andrés, who does some amazing work in this world, declared June 25, Bourdain's birthday, Bourdain Day in 2019. So, if you are thinking of suicide, or worried about a friend, or in need of emotional support, the Lifeline Network is available 24/7 across the US. Call 800-273-8255. I think there's also a short number, I feel like there's a short number that you can call, but we had a dear friend.Brad Crowell 4:20  You can call 988 in the United States.Lesley Logan 4:22  Thank you. Yeah, yeah, who worked with a suicide prevention network in Nevada. And life's really hard right now. It's harder than people think. You look at people and they seem to have it all together, and they don't. A lot of people are tired, a lot of people have a lot going on. So reach out to a friend you haven't heard from or talked to in a while. You just never know. You might help them out, but also make sure you have these numbers, because there are people who are experts who can also support.Brad Crowell 4:49  Yeah.Lesley Logan 4:50  Upcoming travel, Brad, predict this, because what, go ahead, Brad.Brad Crowell 4:54  Yeah, Anthony Bourdain was very inspirational for me. He was living the travel bug that I always had, and when I was in college, my friend and I used to watch his show every single week, No Reservations. I just loved that he was so angry at his producers in that show, and he would get so pissed about cursing and smoking cigarettes on TV. I guess it wasn't live, but on TV, and then.Lesley Logan 5:23  They could just edit it out.Brad Crowell 5:24  hey could have edited it out, but they didn't. Yeah, it just was really inspirational for me. And then he did some amazing stuff too. He was in Beirut when that.Lesley Logan 5:36  Yes! And then also, don't forget his wonderful documentary about food waste.Brad Crowell 5:40  Yeah, food waste.Lesley Logan 5:41  If you haven't seen it, you must see it.Brad Crowell 5:43  It's called Wasted!Lesley Logan 5:44  I think it's called Wasted!Brad Crowell 5:45  Yeah.Lesley Logan 5:45  We actually watched it, and the next day he died by suicide.Brad Crowell 5:48  Yeah.Lesley Logan 5:49  That was really tragic, and that documentary stuck with me. So it's really, really important, because we all need to be aware. In certain countries, they're doing a much better job about food waste than we are. Go Japan! You were commenting from the documentary, so yeah, for me.Brad Crowell 6:03  It was amazing because I never was a chef, but he worked in the food industry, I worked in the food industry, and I got his book Kitchen Confidential when I was in my early 20s. I just thought he was amazing. So, yep, in honor of Anthony Bourdain, and as Lesley was mentioning, if you or anyone you know is suffering with suicidal thoughts, there is support out there for you.Lesley Logan 6:28  Yeah.Brad Crowell 6:29  Yeah.Lesley Logan 6:29  In other news, there are no spots left in Elevate. Every single week in the last few weeks that you've heard that there are spots was a lie.Brad Crowell 6:37  They are sold out.Lesley Logan 6:40  For 2027 anyways. We are already taking applications for 2028. We'll be able to let you snag your spot and reserve it, and all that stuff. But we're going to have a wonderful Q&A call this summer on July 9, I believe it's at 1 PM Pacific time. You can go to lesleylogan.co/elevate to get on the waitlist. We'll have that call information, and you can register for the call. Oh, I should do ll.co/waitlist. Actually, sorry, my producer is doing this in real time, everyone. Anyways, what I want you to do is get on that waitlist, because I do update you monthly on when we have dates and when we're accepting applications, and when you can deposit. I know that 2028 will fill up as soon as we open up those applications, but that means you have a whole year-plus to protect those dates like your life once I figure out what they are. Lesley Logan 7:31  summer tour is coming, but the tickets are available. They've been available for a few weeks, actually a month to be precise, and many cities are sold out. You're like, "Lesley, now that I know you record this in the past-future, how do you know?" Because I do! When we were in Arizona, we actually met many people who were like, "Oh, I'm going to Tucson," and I was like, "Okay, we're probably out of spots in Tucson." So I know that some of these slots are sold out. You want to go to opc.me/tour. Our tours are sponsored by the wonderful Balanced Body and Contrology company. Balanced Body is celebrating 50 years, so it's a really big year for them. It's kind of amazing what they're doing, and it's really special. So I want you to make sure that you join us, because Balanced Body allows our tours to go to more than six places and to do it with a lot of fun. We're bringing Contrology products into the studio so you can try them out. And if you're new here...Brad Crowell 8:25  Welcome.Lesley Logan 8:25  Hi! We also have Pilates flashcards. Did you know that we do? You don't have to be a Pilates instructor to love them. They're actually really wonderful for helping you have access to great Pilates where you are. They're so great, in fact, that people steal my images all the fucking time to put them in their shitty books, but you can get the real thing with the best information that has been edited many times and has quality videos at opc.me/flashcards. Sorry, I'm a little pissed off over here about something, but I am. If you follow me on Instagram, you know how long this has been going on, and just as we were about to hit record, I found out another fucking person is stealing my images from my flashcards.Brad Crowell 9:08  Three more people.Lesley Logan 9:09  Three more people.Brad Crowell 9:10  Yeah, so it's a thing. That's crazy. Anyway, you should know what's crazy.Lesley Logan 9:16  Is that they thought someone wouldn't find out? You know what I mean?Brad Crowell 9:21  I mean, maybe they just don't care.Lesley Logan 9:22  Maybe they don't care, or they're like, "Oh, she only has like 30,000 followers, so no one will know." But my followers know me, and even people who don't follow me are telling me, because I am recognizable at any rate. But you can get my flashcards, the real deal, and support a small business who is going to take on some of these big-ass companies, because there is a company that is a big name that we're about to take down anyways. I'm excited about it. Lesley Logan 9:49  Before we get into... we used to do audience questions here. If you're new, you don't know that, so this is not a new thing for you. But if you're old and you're like, "Oh, I just popped in here on this one," we don't do that anymore. We answer questions on YouTube at 9 AM Pacific Time Live, and that is where I answer them. If you're a member, I answer questions wherever you are a member, so as long as it's part of your membership, right? If you're an agency member, you can ask business questions there. If you are an OPC member, I answer personal Pilates questions there—I answer all those. Plus, there's YouTube, and YouTube is free. People don't know that, but it is. It's free. You have to watch, according to one comment, a diabolical amount of commercials, but it's free. Yes, "diabolical" was the word that was used. However, what we decided to change this to is many of you want to help out people in your life, but often don't know how to help, and there are so many different shitstorms in the world, like, which firestorm do you help with? The reality is that you can help either by just sharing with a friend who needs to hear that this charity exists for them, or you can share your time, or you can share it on your platform, or you can give them money, even $2. Lesley Logan 10:55  So, because June is Pride Month, we are going to wrap up the month's theme with another wonderful LGBTQ+ charity. This is the Prism Foundation, and it was founded in 2021. The Prism Foundation was started to organize and execute initiatives for the LGBTQ+ community in the state of Arkansas, using a multifaceted approach to achieve the following outcomes: increase access to affirming and comprehensive healthcare, align resources that address barriers to care and health disparities among the community, and create safe spaces for both virtual and physical activities and services that serve LGBTQ+ Arkansas.Brad Crowell 11:32  Correct me if we're wrong here, but I think it's Arkansans.Lesley Logan 11:35  What is also exciting, because I was doing some research on them, they are also really aware of what is happening in the states that are surrounding them that are affecting trans people. Part of their vision is: "We are increasing access to healthcare as top of our priorities. We're also focused on creating pathways to fulfill our basic needs, including overcoming barriers to legal aid services and developing supportive community spaces physically and virtually." Lesley Logan 11:59  I think this is really important because unfortunately, and at the time of this recording, there have been some awful things that have been said about trans people from the government that we are under in this country. I won't even repeat his words, because they are too horrible to repeat, that he said this week. But we need to be protecting our people who are different than us, because the fucking people who are taking from you are billionaires. So support the LGBTQ+ people in your area, because one, they are beautiful human beings, and two, they are always there supporting.Brad Crowell 12:39  That's true, there's very much of an activism mentality in that community.Lesley Logan 12:45  Yeah.Brad Crowell 12:45  Really like.Lesley Logan 12:46  And also, my goodness, they have to be tired. I'm sure they are. Anyways, I really like what that Prism organization is doing. I think it has to be hard to do what they do in the areas that they're doing it, so if you want to support, there you go.Brad Crowell 13:05  You can go to their website at arprismfoundation.org to read more about what they are doing and how you could support them.Lesley Logan 13:14  And if that is not your area, because you're like, "I'm not Arkansan," or "I'm not in the Midwest," then look up ones in your area that are doing something locally for you, because there is always a local outlet of something, like we've talked about before on this podcast. We love supporting a restaurant because Bronze Cafe—everyone who's local to Las Vegas who listens to this show, when you buy meals from them, they support the LGBTQ mental health community center here.Brad Crowell 13:38  If you have an organization that is doing good things that we should find out about, and you want to be featured on the pod, call us and leave us a voicemail.Lesley Logan 13:49  I love that. Then it's your favorite charity.Brad Crowell 13:52  At 310-905-5534 and tell us why they're amazing. You can also submit wins, by the way, at beitpod.com/questions so that we can get you in on the Friday episode.Lesley Logan 14:09  Times now, Brad, I have had people tell me that they heard their win months after they submitted it, and it really made their day because they were having a rough day. So I tell people this. Also, just so you know, we've changed the Friday FYF. I bitch about something, and then you were gonna come, but we haven't had a chance for you to bitch about something.Brad Crowell 14:30  Oh, yes.Lesley Logan 14:31  Which is what we do at our other communities, and then I celebrate a win, and then I share their wins. That's cool, and I do a mantra, so we had a change to it because it's quite nice. Maybe my new "need a moment" is that all these people use my fucking image.Brad Crowell 14:46  Well, we'll save that for Friday's episode. Stick around, we'll be right back. Brad Crowell 14:51  All right, now let's talk about Mr. Adrian Starks. Adrian is a professional speaker, voice narrator, and host of the Your Purposeful Life podcast, who openly embraces his authentic, unpolished self, including his fun side as a comic card and superhero fanatic. Having shed the rigid suit-and-tie expectations of his early career, Adrian is deeply protective of the energy he puts into the world, intentionally choosing to step away from the microphone rather than record an episode if he's having a bad day. So, good vibes, right? As a fellow human seeking purpose, he helps his audience navigate what he identifies as the three continuous cycles of purposeful living, and encourages people to make a mess, figure out what works, and ultimately have fun with their journey.Lesley Logan 15:36  Well, we love mess over here. We love messy action, and we're so big on that. Yeah, I also love... I mean, we had a great conversation about evolution, but one of the things we talked about is he said when we try to make things perfect when they're not meant to be—well, nothing's supposed to be—there's going to be major resistance because everything has to flow a certain way. He used the metaphor of salmon noting their journey upstream against the flow of the river is what ultimately exhausts them, and I think that's so true. I think we try to get things to be so perfect, just like, you know, we make it too precious, and you kind of hold on to it too tight. Then you aren't able to hear amazing things or be curious to go a different direction, you know what I mean?Brad Crowell 16:19  I was just talking about the idea of, like, the more effort you put into controlling something, the more it slips through your fingers. And yeah, I mean, I totally get that. Here's how I equate this. This is going to be an amazing parallel for all you ultimate frisbee players out there, of which I know I'm speaking to the right audience. Obviously.Lesley Logan 16:40  I'm sure we have a good two.Brad Crowell 16:42  Clearly, clearly the right audience. I grew up playing very, very competitively, playing ultimate frisbee, and whenever you were gonna throw the frisbee all the way down the field—the disc, as it were, if you put all of your might into that throw, that huck, as it were, is what we would call it, inevitably, you would mess it up. It would curve to the right, or go out of bounds, or whatever. But if you took a half a second before that huge throw, and you just eased and paused when you threw, you paused, and then just let it happen—it would go where you wanted it to every time. It took a long time, and I could always tell as soon as I released the disc, like, "Oh man, I did not do that right." I feel like life is like that too. When you are forcing it, things do not go the way that you want them to, but when you go with the flow, you know, while you're directing it, then things seem to happen a lot more organically, usually. All the things, right?Lesley Logan 17:49  Yeah, it's like a tough balance, right, because.Brad Crowell 17:52  Still have to direct it.Lesley Logan 17:53  Well, because you don't want to just be blowing with the wind, but you also need to feel the flow, right? Like, there are some obstacles that tell us, like, "Not that door," right? That doesn't mean it's a stop sign, it's just like a doorway, like, "Nope, not that door." And I think it's like really understanding, you know, why are you doing this? Why are you doing any of this? Because if you can keep your "why" in mind, it can keep the perfection from taking over, because perfection will honestly end up making something so clean and perfect, no one wants to touch it and do it, or they don't really know what it is, and it's exhausting. It's exhausting to be perfect. Lesley Logan 18:30  Oh my god, there's just certain people in my life, whenever I see them, I'm like, "How long does it take them to get out the door?" Because we just saw someone this past weekend at an event, and every time I see her, I'm like, she's so perfectly coiffed, it must take forever to get out the door, because there's not a hair amiss. The outfit is... the nails match the shoes match the... I mean, like all of it. I'm like, I know how long it takes to get my nails done, so they're just gonna be what they are for four weeks. So, I don't know, I'm just saying this is... if you want to be my friend, don't be perfect, okay?Lesley Logan 19:06  The last thing I'll say is he explained that when we go against the grain of what our purposes are, it creates major resistance that makes us feel like we're not worthy. So, hello, my people who feel imposter syndrome, it's because you're going against the grain of your purpose. If we're truly good at where we are, while we always can improve, we don't need to be perfect. There is this thing... "improve" is the wrong word. We are always... this is something that happens with Pilates instructors that I meet. You always are going to be learning. There's never a point that you're not learning, but there's a difference between chasing down every single person to go through their version of a program with, and also just learning from the body in front of you today. You know what I mean? Every time I teach a new person, a new client, I learn a new way of explaining something. Today we were doing OPC spring training, and this wonderful person asked a great question. I was like, "You know what, I've explained this before, but never to a person with that brand of equipment, with that years of experience, with that understanding of the exercise." So even I am learning something I already know in a different way so I can explain it. It's just... there's ways to learn and improve yourself without having to constantly feel like you've gotta sign up for this next thing, you know? So, anyways.Brad Crowell 20:21  Stay tuned, because how do we know what our purpose is, you know? How do we even know if we're going against the grain? Stick around, because we're going to talk about that in the Be It action items. Brad Crowell 20:32  But what I really wanted to talk about myself was grief, which is interesting because it was an interesting topic that y'all skipped over. You were talking about grieving, not just like a person who might no longer be with us, or obviously a pet or any of that, but even an experience that was supposed to happen, but it didn't, you know? And you were very excited about it, or you had a lot of effort and planning into it. I mean, we know we've been talking about opening a studio for a really long time, and we spent a lot of money, we spent a lot of time at the beginning of this year and last year—beginning of this year like really thinking, planning. I mean, I can't even tell you how many phone calls I made to the city, and I spent hours putting together a plan, a business plan for this. And then three months in, we decided to pause the whole thing because we realized that we were pretty much forcing it, you know, because there was one key thing that was holding us up that was like, "Wait a minute, how are we going to solve this problem?" It was kind of like one of those, "Well, we're gonna... we could... we'll make it work. We'll figure it out. It's gonna..." you know. All of a sudden I was like, "Why do we need to do that? We don't even need to do the studio. It's just gonna cause a lot of stress. And what we could be doing right now is opening a major problem for ourselves." So what we decided to do instead was solve the problem that we would be opening for ourselves first, but that's going to take time.Lesley Logan 22:01  Yeah.Brad Crowell 22:02  Right. So even though we spent this time putting this whole plan together and decided to hit pause, it's interesting because, okay, there's actually another path that is going to set us up for success in the future when we do bring that studio back around. However, it doesn't mean that you don't feel bummed about it. I drive by the location that we picked out, that I've talked with the landlord.Lesley Logan 22:26  I know.Brad Crowell 22:27  And the neighbors, and the city about, and a contractor about.Lesley Logan 22:30  And I envisioned the sign.Brad Crowell 22:32  100 times.Lesley Logan 22:33  I still don't think it's not going to be in that center. I just think it's not that unit. It's just that unit needed way too much money. Yeah, not the rent, but the build-out was like jaw-dropping. It honestly made the grief a little bit easier, I'm not gonna lie, because it was such a "fuck no," you know what I mean? Like, it was just like no fucking way. And so, I do understand there's grief because that's not happening today, and so we still drive by it every single time, but I also think this is where good reflection comes from, too. It's like, in reflecting, it's all out of our control—the parts that are the obstacles, yeah. So I go to bed knowing we did the best we could with what we had in the moment, and had we not had this other stupid bill come through that we're like, "That's a fuck no," we probably would have forced the salmon up the stream a little bit. I think so, because we definitely.Brad Crowell 23:34  Would have.Lesley Logan 23:34  Anyway, would have made it work, but it would have been a hard stress.Brad Crowell 23:38  More complicated than it needed to be. Yeah, but.Lesley Logan 23:40  I do think there is a way you have to grieve changes. We have Elevate members who are like, "I'm grieving the teacher I used to be," because they used to just narrate a Pilates class, for lack of a simple thing. And it's like, "Well, no, now you get to watch it, and you get to see what it is." Part of you is excited because you know better now and you have these more potential possibilities now, but also there was a time that it felt easier, right? And you're a different person when you're in this unknown space. So, like, I'm excited when we open that studio. I'm past the grief thing, but also sometimes I look back at that studio, it would have been really great if it was a Pilates on it already.Brad Crowell 24:19  Yeah, well, that's the thing. You know, you were talking about how grief doesn't really go away because you had built a mental pattern around a person or a thing or an experience that was supposed to happen. You had built that into your thinking, and what ends up happening over time is we think that way a little bit less. It doesn't mean we don't think about the thing, but the expectations that we had alter, they shift, right? And so, you know, what Adrian was talking about was someone, I think he was talking about someone who died, if I recall, and he said sometimes he just needs to embrace when that emotion comes up. He embraces it, he leans into it. He's like, "It's okay for me to feel this right now," and he encourages letting that emotion flow for multiple reasons. It's a testament to how someone or something impacted you, but also it's really important to feel those emotions. So.Lesley Logan 25:16  Yeah, it's hard. I don't know, it's like there's certain... you know, it's really interesting, like there's certain people, places, or things that you grieve in different ways. Our LA studio, I don't ever look back and have tears, like I'm sad with that studio, because it was the right thing to do to make the change, but I do miss having that cute little space.Brad Crowell 25:37  Yeah.Lesley Logan 25:37  You know, I miss it. Yeah, I think back of it fondly, not tears, like, "Oh, I don't have that place anymore," but like, "What a fun two years I had in that space." It was such a... like a treehouse, you know. So, grief doesn't always have to be devastating either, but you have to feel it. We have some great grief podcasts, by the way. Haven't had any recently, but the two that we had were so good: Kim Hamer and another woman... I want to say Kara, but I don't think that's what it was. She's like Coach Something, and they're both on grief. Kim Hamer has a wonderful book on 100 Acts of Love, and her episode about her husband and that grief was so interesting, and what she has done. She was so raw and wonderful and thoughtful. And then there was a woman before her in the episodes, and I'm just talking like as if it's going to come back to me, she actually, unfortunately, watched her husband die, and then she went through all this grief and she was like, "How come this is happening, and why am I not over it?" She literally became a grief coach.Brad Crowell 26:42  Yeah.Lesley Logan 26:42  I want to say it's Kara, but it's not.Brad Crowell 26:44  I have no idea.Lesley Logan 26:46  Anyways, our wonderful producers will figure it out, I'm sure. But you can just go into our catalog; it's definitely in the first 200 episodes. Good luck! Well, here's the thing: if you can find Kim Hamer, it's within two months of Kim Hamer that I remember. So, okay, we're gonna get into our Be It action items, and I can see Brad is going to Google that.Brad Crowell 27:05  Yeah, one was Krista St-Germain.Lesley Logan 27:08  That's the one.Brad Crowell 27:09  And the other was.Lesley Logan 27:12  Kim Hamer. Kim Hamer! So sorry, replace Hamer everywhere I said Scott. There you go.Brad Crowell 27:23  All right, stick around. We'll be right back. We're gonna dig into those Be It action items. Brad Crowell 27:29  All right. Well, welcome back. Let's talk about those Be It action items that we got from Adrian Starks. What bold, executable, intrinsic, or targeted action items can we take away from your combo, Adrian? It's weird to call him Starks. Starks, it sounds like he's like... like.Lesley Logan 27:48  Tony.Brad Crowell 27:49  Yeah, but I was thinking like a football player, like the way that you.Lesley Logan 27:52  I just want to go "Adrian," that's all.Brad Crowell 27:54  Starks redefines the word goal, and I've really loved this, y'all. He's so full of these quippy things that are so applicable, and this one really blew my mind. He said, "I love a goal, but I redefined it with the acronym of Get Out and Live, Get Out and Live." And I was like, "Wow, that's really great." I love that he views goals not as rigid markers but as triggers to move outside of one's comfort zone, scare yourself a little bit, and then break a rut. He suggests regularly asking yourself, what is actually going on here? What am I not happy about? What do I actually want? Specifically focusing on immediate desires rather than five-year plans, he recommends detoxing from social media for several days at a time to avoid the world of comparisons that definitely leads to self-doubt and imposter syndrome.Brad Crowell 28:51  Imposter syndrome, yeah, exactly.Lesley Logan 28:53  Comparison is the thief of joy.Brad Crowell 28:54  Comparison is the thief of joy. What about you?Lesley Logan 28:58  Well, he said your purpose in life is not something you find, it's something that you do, and it's going to change. It's going to evolve with time, and I couldn't agree more. It's so funny. Recently, I posted pictures of myself as a brand new Pilates instructor. I actually wrote a whole series called Outgrowing Yourself, and it's either already come out or it's coming up. No idea. I think it already came out, outgrowing your old version of yourself. And it's so funny, because I don't look back at her going, "Oh my god." I mean, when I said, "Oh my god, I look so young..."Brad Crowell 29:27  You look like a child.Lesley Logan 29:28  I look like a child. I was 25, but I think about what her goals as a new teacher were to where I am right now, and I can say looking back I never have thought, "Oh my god, I'm no longer living my purpose," because my purpose has evolved as a teacher. Because I've evolved in the more that I know, and the people that I teach, and the things that I'm drawn to. There's things that people like, "Don't you want to do this?" and it's like, "No, that's a no, I don't." And even right now people like, "Oh, what about next year?" I'm like, "I think I'm staying home a lot, actually a significant amount of time. I'm staying home." And they're like, "Oh, really?" And it's like, "Yeah, because if you do take the time to get to know yourself, and you do stay aligned with what you want, and you do stay aligned with your purpose, your life has to evolve." And then, because that evolves, and your purpose evolves, I'm like, "My life has to reflect what I'm doing, and then what I'm doing then takes me to my next thing, which means my life has to reflect what I'm doing, and so..."Brad Crowell 30:26  I agree with you on this, but also let's go back to his statement, because I think I remember trying to figure out, like, what am I going to do with my life, or what's my purpose? And we all know that it's important to have purpose in our lives, but I also think a testament to this is the conversations that I've had recently with my parents, who just retired.Lesley Logan 30:51  Yeah.Brad Crowell 30:51  Right. And then the interview that we had with the retirement coach, whose name I'm not recalling, but it was in the last 100 episodes. Lesley Logan 31:01  Definitely. It was definitely, was it this year?Brad Crowell 31:04  But the point is that we think purpose is just going to find us, and we're gonna be like, "Oh my god, that's what I'm here for, that's the thing," right? Instead, what clearly seems actionable is purpose is something that we are out there doing, and whether or not we chose to do it, we're still out there doing it. I mean, I think about my parents with their job, and the thing that was keeping my dad focused on the job was the job. Ultimately, if you step back and look at that, it's not necessarily like whatever... I don't even know what the projects were that he was working on.Lesley Logan 31:45  Ever.Brad Crowell 31:46  Yeah, but the point... I mean, I wasn't intimately involved in the company they work for, so I don't actually understand all the nuance of the things, but he built that purpose over a career of 42 or 43 years, and then now all of a sudden he's thinking about ending it. It doesn't matter how mundane the job is, he's, "Oh, what am I going to do with myself after this? I'm not sure, I don't know," you know. And so that's where we find ourselves unwilling to make a change as well, but then you have... that's like.Lesley Logan 32:16  No, I want to argue with you a little bit, and I'm glad your dad doesn't listen to this podcast. I feel like he did what a lot of people his age did, which is like, "This is my job," and that job became the purpose. Yeah.Brad Crowell 32:31  But that's the point of what Adrian said.Lesley Logan 32:33  But I don't think so, because I think it goes to that saying: if you don't have goals, someone will make their goals your goal, and so I feel like.Brad Crowell 32:43  Your purpose can be inadvertent. Yeah, if you don't take control of what you do, then your purpose will be defined for you, or it can accidentally become your purpose. Yes.Lesley Logan 32:53  And if you don't like it, then you're the person going, "Why is my purpose just to do this project for this many years?" Where I think it's important is this is where self-reflection is so important, because when you self-reflect, you are aware of when you are outgrowing something, or you are being called into something. I don't know if we had a conversation with Adrian, but I definitely had a conversation, and I wrote a newsletter on it, is that a lot of people in the Pilates industry, like, "I need to figure out what my space is in this industry," and it's like, never do that, don't do that. Because no one that you admire ever sat and goes, "What is my little circle in this industry?" No, they went out and carved their path, they created their thing. There'll be an episode coming out that hasn't already with me on Balanced Body's podcast, where they're like, "You carved out this thing." I'm like, I had to, I had to create the thing that I needed. Some of you are already living your purpose, but you actually are looking at other people and going, "I need to look like them," and you haven't taken the time to reflect back, going, "Actually, the thing that I'm doing is the thing that's my purpose, and it's helping these people. And so now that I'm aware of that, I amplify that." Because you're out there amplifying and doing it, it will evolve, because you will continue to hone in and understand and be curious, and change things. So either it inadvertently finds you, and you're doing someone else's purpose, and they'll be grateful, or you discover what it is. But if you look inside.Brad Crowell 34:20  But that's... yeah, it goes... you were both talking about self-reflection, but it goes back to, you know, your purpose in life is not something you find, it's something that you do.Lesley Logan 34:29  Yes.Brad Crowell 34:30  And it is also... it's a change and evolve over time.Lesley Logan 34:33  It's kind of like those movies where the person goes out in seek of what their purpose is, but really their purpose was there all the time, but they weren't taking the time to see that it was there. Go self-reflect anyways. Anything else, Brad?Brad Crowell 34:47  Yeah. He said with purpose you can navigate and make adjustments, right? And he talked about figuring out what actions match the frequency and energy of where you're at right now.Lesley Logan 34:57  Yeah, that's true. That's great.Brad Crowell 34:59  Yeah, I mean, we'll just leave it... we'll just leave that there. Go back and listen, because...Lesley Logan 35:04  Adrian is great.Brad Crowell 35:05  Yeah, he's great.Lesley Logan 35:05  And I, by the way.Brad Crowell 35:06  He does voice acting. How cool.Lesley Logan 35:08  Well, let's listen to his voice.Brad Crowell 35:09  Yeah, it's amazing.Lesley Logan 35:10  Honestly, like, he should really write sleepy stories, like those sleep stories. I would listen every day.Brad Crowell 35:16  Yeah.Lesley Logan 35:17  I also would even listen to him share bad news with that voice, because it's just like, you know, like the BBC type, where it's just matter-of-fact, you know what I mean? Like, I think I could be like, "Okay, well, we're not all gonna die, so there we go." Adrian, thanks for being you. Thanks for being back. You guys, I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 35:34  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 35:35  Share our episodes with a friend who needs to figure out what their purpose is, and then leave a review. Yes, and then send in your win, because you're someone who likes this podcast, or someone likes a checklist, and I just gave you three things that are easy to do, easy to check off. You're gonna feel super successful in your day, so then you can go Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell 35:52  Bye for now.Lesley Logan 35:53  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 36:36  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 36:41  It is transcribed, produced, and edited by the epic team @desenio.co.Brad Crowell 36:45  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music, and our branding by designer and artist Gianfranco Chofi.Lesley Logan 36:52  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals,Brad Crowell 36:56  Also to Angelina Herrico for adding all of our content to our website, and finally to Meredith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Most people are waiting to find their purpose. Adrian Starks says that's exactly why they're stuck. The podcaster, voice narrator, professional speaker, and entrepreneur behind Your Purposeful Life returns to the show to share with Lesley Logan about the real cost of perfectionism, the salmon's lesson on fighting your purpose, and the daily self-reflection practice that quietly rebuilds your direction. This one's for anyone in a rebuild season, ready to stop searching and start moving. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Why saying "I don't know" is the most underrated leadership move.The three cycles every purposeful life moves through on repeat.What happens when you stop checking in with your own purposeThe two questions Adrian asks instead of just journaling his thoughts.The real difference between nice people and kind people in your life.Episode References/Links:Adrian Starks Website - https://adrianstarks.comYour Purposeful Life Podcast - https://beitpod.com/purposefullifeAdrian Starks on YouTube - https://beitpod.com/adrianyoutubeAdrian Starks LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/feed/?nis=trueAdrian Starks Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/adrian.starksEp 191. with Adrian Starks - https://beitpod.com/ep191The Last Black Unicorn by Tiffany Haddish - https://a.co/d/0iNbLUALAre You My Mother by P.D. Eastman - https://a.co/d/0clbpmbUSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Adrian Starks 0:00  Your purpose in life is not something you find, it's something that you do, and that is going to change. It's going to evolve with time, and that's okay. Having self-doubt is okay; not knowing everything is okay.Lesley Logan 0:13  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:55  All right, Be It babe. I'm gonna keep this short and sweet, because you've got some gems, some nuggets, some magic coming at you. We have one of the best conversations I had at the beginning of this pod, episode 191. Our guest is Adrian Starks, and he is back, and he is back with so much. It's so fun how a difference of a few years can make when you're living your life and you're following your purpose and reflecting what you can do and what you learn about yourself that you can share with others. So here are so many amazing tips on helping you find your purposeful life. And if you love Adrian, go check out his podcast, Your Purposeful Life. Lesley Logan 1:29  All right, Be It Pod, we have a guest back. I think, honestly, this might be the biggest gap from the first episode to the next episode. So, Adrian Starks, we have a lot to talk about. We, one, probably have to reintroduce you to everybody, and then two, we have to hear what you've been up to, how you're being it till you see it. So, tell everyone who you are and what you're rocking at these days.Adrian Starks 1:48  Well, it is so great to be back, Lesley. Let me tell you. My name is Adrian Starks, of course. I'm a podcaster, voice narrator, speaker, entrepreneur, all the good stuff. But yeah, that's who I am.Lesley Logan 2:01  Are you reading books? Are you a narrator like that? Are commercials what we're doing with it? I mean, a great voice.Adrian Starks 2:06  We're reading books, we're narrating for commercials, we're doing a lot of things.Lesley Logan 2:11  Cool, that's so fun. How did... okay, we have to talk more about that. But first, so we had you on for episode 191, and I was on your pod, and we really had a great time because you had some really great "be it till you see it" moments. And I think maybe we can go back a little bit of the be it till you see it where we left off to here, because maybe I missed it, maybe I didn't get as excited, but I can't believe narrating commercials and stuff like that. That's got to be so fun using this amazing voice you have to do what you're doing. So take us back a little bit, so we can get to the present.Adrian Starks 2:48  Okay, so how did I get into that? Well, that's a good question. I started out as speaking, professional speaking, and then I just started making connections along the way, started auditioning for certain things. I did a lot of things on certain platforms, like reading for children's books, I did some audios for other people's books, and then one thing led to another. The next thing I know, I'm getting offered opportunities to do other things, like narrating, and it's fun for me. I enjoy it, and I love it. So that's where I'm at today, doing that, along with podcasting, along with just being it till you see it.Lesley Logan 3:20  Yeah, how has your podcast changed? It's been like almost 400 episodes since we've talked, so that's like at least two years.Adrian Starks 3:28  Yeah.Lesley Logan 3:30  Because when we start our podcast, we have an intention of what it is, and then we evolve. The podcast has to evolve. What have you kept the same, and what have you realized that as you've changed, you've changed?Adrian Starks 3:44  Wow, the podcast has evolved, and I've changed over time, in a way of not so polished like I was before. Before, I was very astute, and I had to talk about this, talk about that, and make sure all my answers are correct. Now I was like, you know what, there's some things I just don't know, and I'm gonna show certain sides of myself that no one's ever seen. So now people are seeing the comical side of me. I'm into comics, I'm into a lot of fun things, comic cards, comic books, superheroes, of course, reading. But the podcast has evolved in a sense of me now just... I'm not looking for the answer of purpose. I just want to understand what people's perspective of it is, and that has changed.Lesley Logan 4:30  Oh, I understand that. I get that, because it's called Your Purposeful Life. And I love that you're like, "I thought it has to be astute. Everything has to have an answer, because that's what everyone wants." Everyone wants an answer. I have these students in this mentorship program, and they asked a question, and I talked for seven minutes. My fathom is like that's like a monologue, and I was like, "I have fully answered your question, and I want to acknowledge that it doesn't sound like there's an answer in there because you want yes or no."Adrian Starks 5:01  That's the truth.Lesley Logan 5:01  But it's such a lot of questions about our life and the things that we do. There's nuances; there's things that might be too much purpose for you and not enough for someone else. And so it's complicated.Adrian Starks 5:14  It's very complicated. And I go by the philosophy of Socrates. He said that "I know that I know nothing," and that is something that is very courageous to do in this day and time. Yes, we want to be knowledgeable about things. Yes, we want to have things that we give to people that are correct, because, like in your case, when you're teaching people, you want the knowledge to be there for them. But there's a lot of cases where there's just some things we don't know, and that's okay. That's what learning is for, and being able to be a person in your field and be a leader, and say, "You know what, I don't know, but I would like to find that answer out with you, or find some type of solution to what this is." And that's where I feel like we're living now in this day and time; people are looking for solutions, but they're also looking for connection to that solution.Lesley Logan 6:06  Yeah, and I think there's a trust to be built there. There has to be something that there's an alignment. I actually remember when I first became a Pilates instructor, I think I had to know the answer to everything, and I have found that my clients and the students I teach, they might not love when I say, "I don't know. Let me think about it," but also I may never know. The person I studied under has passed, the person he studied under has passed, like there's just going to be some things we don't have an answer to. So I think it's very brave and courageous to be like, "I don't know the answer to that, but this is what I know, and I know enough of this to keep going in this direction." Being a recovering perfectionist and overachiever, I used to really need someone to tell me the right or left turn to take, and I've gotten better at going, "Oh, I'm going to take this left-hand turn, and based on the information I have, it should get me where I'm going, and if it doesn't, we'll get as far as we did, and we'll figure it out."Adrian Starks 7:05  That is the same way with me, too. You and I both share that common theme of being the perfectionist and wanting to have, we call these Type A personalities, they want certain things a certain way, and that's okay. But there are times where you have to just let things flow. I was thinking about this the other day. I had a day where everything seemed to be going against me, and I was trying my best, because I'm very stubborn, to make things go the way that I wanted them to. And the more I did that, I found that there was more resistance, something got delayed, something didn't happen, something fell through, and then I realized that, okay, I'm going against the nature of things. And when we go against the nature of things, when we try to make things perfect when they're not meant to be, that's going to be major resistance, because everything has to flow a certain way.Lesley Logan 7:57  Yeah.Adrian Starks 7:57  I'm all about looking at nature as a way of teaching, and if you look at the salmon, so I'm from the Pacific Northwest, here in Seattle, and the salmon, when they go upstream, that one last journey to lay their eggs then spawn, they go upstream. That's the last thing they do when they get there, is do that, and then they die. Now, the question remains: is it the exhaustion that gets them? Is it just that that was their purpose, like we're going to go back, we're going to give life, and then that's it? Well, there's a number of things going on, but the true essence is that that journey against the flow of the river, that's what exhausts them. So, by the time they get to the top and they do their thing, there is no energy left to go back.Lesley Logan 8:47  Yeah.Adrian Starks 8:47  And when I look at our days and our lives, and when we're going against the grain of what our purposes are, then that creates major resistance. It makes us feel like we're not worth it, makes us feel like we're not perfect. It makes us feel like we're incompetent, and the answer to that is that we're not. We're truly good at where we are. We can always be better, but we don't need to be perfect.Lesley Logan 9:11  Yeah, I interviewed someone about being 1% better every day, and eventually that just is too compounding for me. I've done math, and that's a lot, for the recovering overachiever. 1% better every day, and it's like some days you're gonna be 3% worse, because you made a mistake that you had to go learn and unravel and go back, and that requires... there's just things, it's a lot of pressure. But I do think that as long as your intention is to be a learner and to continue to put out what you feel your creative spirit is, then you're going to make mistakes, but you can recover from them and keep going, and you learn more, you have better muscle strength. Some days when you're having those resistances, you actually just build stronger resilience for what you're going to do, because the closer you get to the thing that you want, you'll have a lot of rejection along the way. People doubting that your idea is a good one, and you need to strengthen your resilience, so you can get to where you want to go. Because when you get there, there's going to still be some doubters; it's going to be even more, because now you're more known for it. And so now there are these people who are like, "Who do you think you are?" And it's like, I think I'm the person who's been working on this for 20 years. Where are you? You just got here.Adrian Starks 10:25  Exactly. That's what people see, they see the outcome, they see just that result. They don't see the build-up to it.Lesley Logan 10:31  Yeah.Adrian Starks 10:31  And it's like when you look at trees when they grow, you don't see the roots that are deep into the ground that have spent years getting its grounding so the tree can go upward and it can balance itself. You only see the blossoming of the tree, and we forget that there's a lot going on in the dark here, a lot that's causing this tree to be the way it is. And I love the fact that you said learning too, because that kind of rang a bell with me when I talk about purposeful living. There's three cycles, and one of them is learning. We have to be constant students of ourselves and our environments, learning what is actually going on in my environment, what am I not getting, what mistakes am I making, what can I improve, and then that learning process will trigger the second step. Once you realize that, that second step is growth.Lesley Logan 11:19  Yeah.Adrian Starks 11:20  We trust what we've learned. Right now, we're beginning to put it into action a little bit. We're starting to apply it, like, "Okay, this didn't work. Let me dial back here. Let me try this now. Let me try something different. Let me try a different road. Let me not go down this road anymore." And then, once you do that enough, that growth, then we move into the third part of the cycle, which is self-expression. That's the complete trust that now you've learned it, you put it into action, and now you know what works and what doesn't work for you. Now you're just going to have some fun with it. Then once you start having fun, the confidence builds up. Okay, now let's learn some more, let's grow some.Lesley Logan 11:58  Yeah.Adrian Starks 11:59  And you just keep doing that over and over through your lifespan here on the planet. And the beautiful thing is, like you were mentioning, you don't have to be perfect doing it, make a mess, and then clean it up as you go.Lesley Logan 12:10  Oh my god, I think the best things... I look at them in my office at the end of the day, and I'm like, "Yeah, we did some great work here." Maybe that's the ADHD that just puts things down instead of putting it away, but at the end of the day I look and go, "Oh yeah, if I thought I didn't do anything today, I was wrong." Clearly, I've been in every place in this room, I've done all these things, and I think that's a sign of a good day. It's interesting. I think another part of that growth process you're talking about is putting yourself around people who are the next step ahead, because if you end up doing all of that, and then you're just surrounded by people who haven't done that, it's really easy to either get a little full of yourself or to stop growing, or think that there's not another level. I've always had some great friends in my career that are about seven to 10 years ahead of me in age or in the profession, and I love it because they are always telling me what their complaints are, and I can go, "Oh, well, I don't have to experience that complaint. That sounds like a terrible thing, that sounds really exhausting." If I just change it now, I feel like I'm a little bit... not skipping ahead, but just having stronger guidance towards where I'm at and what I'm doing. So it's almost like the HOV lane on the freeway. I'm still going to be in a little bit of traffic, but it's a little less, less people.Adrian Starks 13:33  No, I agree with you. I love that, because it's so true. We do need to surround ourselves with people that uplift us, inspire us, and also show us what not to do. We can learn two ways: learn what to do and learn what not to do. A lot of times, learning what not to do is even bigger than learning what to do. It saves you time and energy. And we also have to be careful, too, with people that are around us that may be, not intentionally but unconsciously, pulling us away from that thing that we really want to do for ourselves, for our communities, for society. We get used to just being the person that's like, "Okay, we're good, we have a good time, and we get along." But is this person really, or this group, are they really challenging you to grow? Are they really allowing you to see things that you need to see in order to move forward? And it's hard. It's really hard to think about that consciously, because we get so used to just being in the group, and we can talk a lot about self-reliance, but we need each other.Lesley Logan 14:40  Yeah.Adrian Starks 14:41  You can never ascend alone; I believe that completely. Back in the day when I was doing my professional speaking on stages, I was in Canada, I was speaking, I thought it was all about me. I was like, "Hey, I got the answers, I'm teaching everybody." Then, boom, COVID hit. Humbleness, you know. It was like there was nobody around, because I was just by myself, and I was just doing my thing. I didn't have that group or those people to reassure me to say, "Hey, okay, you need to recalibrate here. We're doing this over here, you might want to take a look at what we're doing." I didn't have that group, and I'm glad that you said that, because there needs to be people that kind of challenge you. But at the same time, when you hit a pocket where it's like, "What do I do? How do I get better?" then you have that group to look to, or that person to look to, as an example.Lesley Logan 15:40  I agree. I think it's really easy, and I see it happening now, because it's almost like we forgot that there was a COVID. My schedule, even though as intentional as I've been, it's been very busy, and people are like, "Oh, when are you coming back?" And I'm like, "Probably not till 2028. I have not accepted any gigs for next year. I've not accepted any gigs." I've got an idea that I need to do, and that's gonna require me to be at home, and I've got another idea that won't happen unless I'm at home, so I gotta do that. And people just look at me like, "What?" And I'm like, "This is how busy I was pre-COVID." And then during COVID, it became very clear who my friends were because we were just at the same places at the same time, and who my friends were because they wanted to talk to me even when we weren't running into each other. So that really helped me go, "Okay, these are the people who care about me, no matter how they benefit, right?" And then these other people, they're not bad people if that's all they want to talk to me, but it's just that it's interesting to note who you want to share things with. But I think we have to realize that there was this beautiful time that helped us reflect on where we were going, and we got this reset, and how we used it hopefully was intentional. And then now we're back at it, and it's so easy to forget what that was. I'm seeing people fall back into the patterns of pre-COVID, and I'm like, I need to have intentional relationships. And speaking back to your podcast, my purpose is something that will probably change, will change as my life goes on, but if I'm not paying attention to it, I'm not gonna realize that; I'm gonna be doing five years ago's purpose.Adrian Starks 17:19  It's true. In the purpose thing, it's not what you find, it's what you do, and it's constantly evolving with you. We talked about in the beginning, you were asking me about what changed and what brought this about; it was just the changing of my purpose. I realized that there were things now that... okay, now I'm interested in this, or now this is moving into this direction because of these external situations that I can't control, so how do I adapt? Thomas Carlyle, he was a Scottish philosopher, and he said that a person without a purpose is like a ship without a rudder. What that means is that when you don't have a rudder in your ship, when something comes around unexpectedly, your ship just starts spinning and it goes off course. But when you have a rudder, meaning you have a purpose, something you're working with, no matter what's happening, you can navigate and be like, "Okay, let's make a little adjustment here. This may not work, but we're still going to go ahead with the plan." The plan is just altered a little bit, and that's what it is to be purposeful. It's just actively knowing that this year was different than three years ago, and so this year, what can we do that matches the frequency and energy and intensity of where we're at right now? And that's what I've come to realize, it's just you don't have to look back and say, "This is where I was, oh poor me." A lot of people felt this way, and I felt this way, like what happened to that spark, what happened to that person that was doing all these things over here? And I have to come to a reality check. Life... shit happens. Things happen, and we can't control them, but we also have the amazing ability as human beings to adapt and adjust.Lesley Logan 18:56  Yeah.Adrian Starks 18:56  We're the only species on the planet that can do that. All the other things of nature and animals, if there's a cliff, they just keep going because they know they got to get on the other side, migration-wise. But when it's us, we're like, "That shit ain't working. This is not working, we'll go over here." That's our ability to do that, and that's why I said the purpose, it's like you can guide it, it doesn't necessarily have to pull you, and that's where we get our true self-creative factors coming from and just making changes that we need to make in our lives.Lesley Logan 19:30  Yeah, so I want to go back to because you know what your podcast has become now. Brad and I have been making changes to our pod, and we were on our vacation in Europe, and we're listening to a podcast, and it started with like... I say we're gonna stop playing the music before the ads. Why are we doing that? Because if we want it to sound really produced, we have great producers, they're listening to this, you guys are amazing, love you, but they're great producers with or without that. And all these other podcasts I listen to, they don't have the music going into it, they just go into an ad. And that's kind of annoying, but you know what? How the podcast gets paid is for ads, so sorry, that's how it's paid for. These things cost a lot of money to do, so we're doing that. And it's like, "Well, what else?" And I'm like, "You know, I'm actually bored of this. I'm actually tired of that." And then you're like, "Oh my god, but my listeners are so used to it, people don't like change." But also it's like, "But this is my podcast, and I have to like doing it." So, what are some changes you've made, or decisions you've done? And then, did you think about how did you... did you tell the listeners, or you just did it? How did you do it?Adrian Starks 20:32  I have to say, to be honest and fully transparent, I did not tell my listeners I was going to take a hiatus off. I just did it. And what's interesting is that listeners... they begin to listen more because they missed that space. There's this saying that people don't miss you until you're gone.Lesley Logan 20:53  Yeah.Adrian Starks 20:54  When people don't hear from you, they get very curious. I always say this to people, I say, "I'm incubating." They're like... "I'm cooking up some stuff here, I'm working on some other things that I'm just incubating right now, but there's still things you can listen to." And I think that it would be nice to tell our listeners that, "Hey, I'm going to go on a five-month hiatus here, or six months, or seven months." But in all honesty, I don't think that would be... for me, that wouldn't be a good idea, because then they just stop listening. They'll just start moving on to something.Lesley Logan 21:23  Yeah because they know, "Okay, they'll be back in six months."Adrian Starks 21:25  So they're like, "Well, he's not gonna release anything new, so we're just gonna move on to the next person." And some people will do that, but I think that at the end of the day, we're human. If we're taking off and we're gone, we're gone. And when we come back, then we can explain, like, "Hey, I was gone for a minute. This is what's been going on." People want the real these days, and they want to know what is going on in your life.Lesley Logan 21:48  Yeah.Adrian Starks 21:49  Like I remember when professional speaking was so polished, everyone was on stage, they had suits and ties on, and I'll never forget I started out with a suit and tie. For some people, they can feel good; that makes them feel great. But I was like, "This is not me, I can't be this person." So I stopped wearing the suit and tie, I started being myself, wearing casual clothes. Then the podcasting industry kicked off, it boomed. It started back in 2018 is when it really began to take off, and at the podcasting stage, I was beginning to do the same thing: well-polished, all this stuff, and then I realized, no, not me. And the podcast over time has changed, it's evolved. You will see different perspectives of myself. There was one person asking me, "Do you think you should take down the episodes from the very beginning, because it's so not in alignment with what you're doing now?" And I said, "Absolutely not." I said, "This shows transparency, that I started with this idea, now we're moving on to these things, and it just shows the purpose, how it's constantly changing." And that's where we're at. But yeah, back to your question, I kind of went on a tangent there, but back to your question about whether you tell people or not: I think no. I think we do what comes natural, and yeah. In this day and time, everyone wants attention. I've noticed this on social media, I'm gonna have to say it, I'm gonna have to bring it up here, it's been on my mind a lot, everybody wants attention, everybody's doing podcasting right now. Lesley, you've been around for quite some time, you're a veteran in podcasting, but the people now... everybody, birds, cats, dogs, they all have podcasts now.Lesley Logan 23:26  I know everybody wants.Adrian Starks 23:27  To be on a podcast, and you know what? It's saturated the market. We're competing with people who don't really have a passion for what they do; they're just getting people on their show to talk to. I know some people will disagree with that, and that's okay, but this is my perspective because I've seen it. When we feel a certain way, like something doesn't resonate with us, it's okay to pull away. That shows we truly are in our essence. We're not doing this to impress, and we're not doing this hoping you stay with me and follow me. If you connect with me energetically and you really like what I do, then you'll go with the flow. I understand it's a business for us too, and we have to continue to do the things that bring business, but at the same time, it is what it is. You just have to know that if you're feeling a certain way, either do it or don't do it. I have this thing I do: if I'm not feeling an episode, I'm not going to get on a mic. I'm not going to talk if I'm having a shitty day, sorry for my language here, but if I'm having one of those days where I've encountered someone or done something in business and it's just not sitting right with me, then I'm not going to get on the mic. At that point, that energy is going to come across, my head will be somewhere else, and I'm not truly present. So, I think it's great for us to be able to take time off and just step away for a bit.Lesley Logan 24:49  I appreciate you saying that. There's this one podcast that Brad listened to, and the guy was like, "I'm taking off three months. Here's why I'm doing that, and here's what's going on." He was very honest. He said, "I'm having some burnout, I feel like I'm overworking, and I want to put some new systems in place." Then he said, "And here are the things I created for you." And I thought, Oh my god, why would you do that? You are tired. It was very thoughtful, but that was just extra work just to get to the finish line. And this other podcast I listened to, I realized, like, a couple, because he's a Friday podcast, it's True Crime of the Week, and so obviously it's very topical, it's very like time sensitive, and like after a couple weeks I was like, oh, that's interesting, I haven't heard from him in a bit, right, and then it kind of just went on, and the other day, two weeks ago, he came back, and I was like, oh, they're The True Crime of the Week, right, I was so excited to see it in my lineup, so I like hit it, and he goes, yeah, it was supposed to take a two week hiatus, and I took four months, and I apologize, it's been a while, but I really.. this is what I didn't know. There's a lot going on that just.. it felt like I didn't feel like I could talk about true crime with all the heaviness that's going on, and I didn't have the words to say what I was feeling, and so I just took time for myself, and I was like, you know what, I actually hold nothing against him, because I actually found that to be even more honest. It was like I needed time off, because I'm a big fan of, like, I'm not going to share anything with the world unless I fully processed it, because then, and I learned this from Tiffany Haddish, from her book, The Last Black Unicorn, she's like, if you have fully processed it, then no matter what people say, it's just going to bounce right off of you, right, but if you haven't fully processed it and you shared it, you're gonna take whatever they're saying personally, or you're gonna be offended by it, or you're gonna get frustrated, or you're gonna feel like you defend yourself again. And so I'm often late to some of the topics that are online, because it takes me a little bit to go, well, how do I feel? Does that bother me? Why does it bother me? What's going on? And then when I've processed it, then I'll, then I'll share it, and I find, like, I think it's better to be human, and social media is a problem. Podcasting, oh my god, there's so many. I'm proud to say this podcast in the top 1% of all podcasts in the world, even with all the crap that's out there. But, like, I find that sometimes I'm like, oh, I should have more followers or more likes on the posts that I have based on my career, but I won't do the click bait stuff. I refuse to do these three exercises, help you trim your waist. It's like, no, if you're perimenopausal, good fucking luck, and your hormones.. like, I'm sorry, there isn't, you know? My girlfriend was like, "Just say these three, and then, and then get them to click and go sorry, there is none. Go talk to your doctor." I'm like, that is just going to get people mad, like that would piss me off. I felt lied to, so it's not my style. So, I think, you have to stay true to yourself, and sometimes that means just honoring the pause. But also, Adrian, I feel like that requires self-reflection. So, what are you doing? Because it feels like you're quite knowledgeable about yourself. What do you do to make sure you're checking in with yourself? Do you journal? What do you do?Adrian Starks 27:41  So, I would say that the first thing I do is I ask myself questions. I know that a lot of people talk about journaling, and that's part of it, but in all honesty, I just ask myself, what's going on? You just gotta sit down somewhere and just say, okay, what's going on? What am I not happy about? What do I want? That's the big thing. What do I want? And then you start thinking in your head, and then thoughts start rolling. And as those thoughts start rolling, write some of them out or record them. Either way, document them somewhere. Then I ask myself, what do I want to do? Not like what do I want to do in five years, because that's just too much processing in a time where you're just likeLesley Logan 28:23  I agree. Just here to harm me, but I do know what I have told my team is I want to be retired in 10, but what I want to do in five is like a whole different story.Adrian Starks 28:34  It is, and we put time frames on ourselves, or we put this limit of like, I got to be here in five years, it's a good marker to get you going, but it's not necessarily something you need to be focused on, like that's what you, that's how it's going to end up, like it could be a number of things that happens between that point that brings that goal about, but like I said, there's, and I have to be careful the word goal, because the goal I feel is very saturated too, and I use it in a different term, I use goal as this, g o a l, get out and live, do something. Yeah, I use that as that's what I use for it. It just teaches me that when I said something, it forces me to get outside of my box and start living a little bit. Scare yourself a little bit. Say I'm gonna go over here, I'm gonna fly over here, I'm gonna spend time over here, or I'm gonna do this, do something that's just out of your comfort zone to get you out of that rut. And then that's what I do. So, once I'm out of the rut, then I'm like, okay, now let's sit down and let's look at creating a plan. But the first thing is, you got to get yourself out of the rut, you got to do something just to move, move your body, so to speak, right? You tell your clients this, move your body, you got to move, move, move your thoughts out of this head, and to put it somewhere else, but I do that, so I do a lot of self-reflection of asking myself, what do I want, what's going on, and then I also remind myself of what I've been doing. You've got to give yourself a pat on the back, because whatever you've been doing, it's been working.Lesley Logan 29:58  Yeah.Adrian Starks 29:59  And a lot of times we have high expectations for ourselves because we live in a world of comparisons, and it's very easy to do that now. Because when you go online, it's not just people who are very successful out there. You can see your friends, your family, and you're like, "Oh, hey, they flew over here and went to the Bahamas. I'm stuck here in this area over here, I can't even do this." And then you start down-talking yourself.Lesley Logan 30:25  Yeah.Adrian Starks 30:26  This happens with people in relationships and business and social environments, and so I think be careful with comparisons.Lesley Logan 30:32  Yeah.Adrian Starks 30:33  So I make sure I don't do that. That's why I get away from social media sometimes. I'll spend maybe a few days detoxing. I won't even look at social media, and then I'll just kind of sit in the dark a little bit, so to speak, away from technology, and just ask myself questions. I do reading a lot. Reading is a big part of my life. You mentioned a book before, and I love reading books. I don't necessarily read the whole book. I do what I call check-ins, so I will find something in the book that resonates with me, and then I will reflect on thatLesley Logan 31:07  Yeah.Adrian Starks 31:08  Along with my other things.Lesley Logan 31:09  Yeah, I like the talking to yourself, because journaling for me is really great, but it's really easy for it to become a to-do list. Like I could be, "Oh, don't forget that." But if I am out walking my dog, I mean, maybe it's because I have ADHD and I'm an Aquarius, so I live in my head, but I have these interesting thoughts pop in and I'm like, where's that coming from? Why am I thinking that? What have I been doing? And I love the pat yourself on the back with what you did do, because I do think most people, the reason they get into comparison is because they've forgotten what they did do. It's why this podcast has a Friday episode where people have to share their wins, because I really think people need to realize there's a lot of wins. And we had someone in one of our groups who was like, she had her best friend's mom die three months ago, and her best friend died two weeks ago, and she's like, "How do I still work on my goals during this time?" And I'm like, you don't. You're going through something. Loss is real, and we all grieve very differently. And maybe someone can work on their goals because they're not tackling the grief right now, it's not hitting them, and it hits them in five years. I don't know, there's different things, but I can't sit here with the life experience I've had and the business coaching I've done and go, "Yeah, just do one thing a day." No. Did you shower and sleep today? That's great. Did you actually eat some food? Are your kids still alive? You're nailing it, like you're going through something. I think people aren't realizing that the Bahamas trips are not the win. The win is, especially when you're in something, the win is that you got up and you tried again today, you know? And I think reflecting on that is really important. I do think asking yourself what I want, that is, because I often think people ask themselves that five years ago but forgot to ask themselves four and three and two and today. And so they forget why they're doing what they're doing, because that's not what they want anymore, but they never checked in.Adrian Starks 33:03  They never checked in. And here's the catch: the answer won't come to you right away, and it's not supposed to. You're asking something deeper inside yourself that hasn't been listened to with all the noise. So, once you put that there and you say, "What do I want?" then overnight, who knows? You may wake up in the morning and you've got an idea about something, so that's coming from that deep part of you. And there was a Howard Thurman, he was the mentor to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and he said that the greatest and the longest and hardest journey ever is a journey inward. And we avoid that journey because we don't think there's anything there. The answer is inside of us. We just don't take out time to really probe and ask ourselves that question. We're very good about asking other people questions, but we don't want to ask ourselves questions, and that's something that has evolved with me. It's like, okay, you're good at asking questions and interviewing, but what about you? What's behind that skin of yours? What's going on? What's going on, dude? What are we doing today? You want to start checking in and being like, okay, what's really the problem here? You got irritated with this person, they didn't do anything to you. Then you got to pull yourself aside and say, okay, what's happening?Lesley Logan 34:16  Yeah.Adrian Starks 34:17  Why am I upset? And that's that self-reflection of like, okay, you're upset because there's a number of things that you're ignoring that you're putting to the side, and you're feeling like people don't see you because you don't see yourself.Lesley Logan 34:30  Yeah.Adrian Starks 34:30  So therefore you're putting that on other people, and that's where we have to be very careful with ourselves and just be patient and be kind to ourselves more often, because that was a problem I had. I held myself to very high standards, that I had to do this, I had to be this way, I had to be well-polished. That's why now you hear some curse words coming off of me, because I'm just being natural.Lesley Logan 34:54  Yeah.Adrian Starks 34:54  I mean, I can go off and say all these astute, know all these great words, and make myself look very articulate, blah blah blah blah, but at the end of the day, it's like, how am I showing up right now? That's the truth, and that's what people need to hear. So, I would say, yeah, talk to yourself, ask yourself questions, and be careful with who you ask information from.Lesley Logan 35:20  Yes.Adrian Starks 35:21  Because that's what gets you in trouble. And a lot of times with people working in environments where they may not be around the people that they choose to be around, I want to get to these people too, because a lot of people out there, they're working in environments they don't really want to be in, but they have an objective to get the hell out of there. But in the meantime, you're with people, let's just say the work world, seven, eight hours a day, and then you're dealing with those people, and then you're trying to get out of that environment. Well, you have to be careful what you listen to, how you conversate with them, and for goodness' sake, don't ask them for advice if they're not doing what you're doing, or if they haven't dove into what you're learning. Do not ask them, please, no, don't confide in them. I don't care how nice they are. There's this thing too that came up about nice versus kind.Lesley Logan 36:09  Yeah.Adrian Starks 36:10  And people get in trouble with this. It's like, okay, they're a nice person, great, but do they have good intentions towards you? And most likely, it's probably not.Lesley Logan 36:18  Yeah.Adrian Starks 36:19  A kind person, they just want to do good, they don't need nothing from you, right? So, a lot of people get mixed up in that, so be careful. I would say to people, when you're in that moment where you're vulnerable, the vulnerable state, guard that.Lesley Logan 36:32  Yeah.Adrian Starks 36:32  Be careful, be careful, be careful. And one more thing about the grieving that you mentioned: I lost my father a few years ago, and I'm still grieving because he had such a powerful presence in my life. So, grieving is not something we get over. We're supposed to learn to live with it. And I've cried multiple times, and every now and then, sometimes I catch myself, I'll just tear up, but you know what? I let it flow, because that's how he impacted me.Lesley Logan 36:59  Yeah.Adrian Starks 37:00  And for the person that you just mentioned, I would advise for them not to ignore that. If you have a moment and you're with somebody, tell somebody, "Hey, you know what? I'm having a moment right now. I need to step away." It's okay to tell people that.Lesley Logan 37:15  It's actually kind. It's kind because you're being super... you're actually being real authentic. You're feeling your feel, and you're letting people in like, "Hold on, I know we're supposed to have coffee right now, I just need to have a moment." And you can however you want to have that moment, go into your car, take the extra time, whatever that is. But I do think people think that they have to get over a loss like that, and the grief coaches that I've interviewed on this podcast, what I have really understood is that you don't. That's why grief is so hard. Your brain has to learn new rhythms and new patterns because that person's not there, and that person was part of a blanket that you've woven of your life, and so you're expecting that person where they repeat, and they're not. So you have to weave a new pattern for your brain. It takes time.Adrian Starks 38:00  It so takes time, and that's all we've got. At the end of the day, we only have time. And time doesn't go backwards, it doesn't go forward, it's just right there. And when we're grieving something, or it could be not just someone in our family, could be anything, could be a loss of an opportunity, that's a grieving thing. It could be a loss of a business or something. I mean, it could be anything. We have to just be mindful that we're human, and don't blame ourselves and don't beat ourselves up internally about it. We have to just know that this is something that's happened. Now, what can I do that can move me forward? And sometimes it's just going to take time. Patience is what we have to have.Lesley Logan 38:43  Yeah, also people don't realize that you could be excited about the next step, and there's still grief for what you left behind, you know? Like, I was so excited to move to Las Vegas, I still grieve that I closed a studio to do it, and I was very proud of that work, and I wasn't really actually ready to close that studio, but this is really exciting. So, something can be exciting, and there's still a loss that's there that you have to go, "Oh, what about that am I bummed about? Where..." You have to let those feelings happen. And I think that the more people actually self-reflect, the more they're going to find purpose in their life, they're going to figure it out. I find like people are looking to others to figure out their purposes, and I want to go back to your advice thing, because I really think people have to hear this 17,000 times. And I love that you brought up like you can have that job that pays the bills, but don't ask those people for advice. That might even be family too. I love mine, they listen to this pod, and sometimes I'll tell you personally, I'm not asking them for advice. They're not entrepreneurs, their face is not the business. If they say the wrong thing, they don't have people who will be disappointed, like hundreds of people, you know. So, they're not the best people for advice. Could I tell them things? Of course, that's different, telling people something, sharing your life with them is very different than asking them what to do. And so you really might need to take some time to write down who would be the best people in my life to ask advice from. If you don't have those people, like when I was first starting out, I didn't have money or mentors, I had to go, okay, I've listened to podcasts starting like 2012, 2013, I'm like, "This person makes a lot of sense. This is the person I'm going to infer advice from," and I would search their pods to find the thing that I thought might be an answer to my question. Sometimes it's that. Sometimes you don't even know the person you're asking advice from, but be intentional about that. I agree.Adrian Starks 40:33  Yeah, being intentional and just knowing that you're going to vibe with people a certain way. There are some people out there in the industry when I first started that I liked, and some that I didn't really vibe with. Didn't mean that there was anything against them, it's just that everyone's different. So, advice I would also give is that don't look at someone for their popularity, look for how they make you feel.Lesley Logan 40:55  Beautiful.Adrian Starks 40:56  Don't look at someone and say, "Oh, they've got millions of comments, they've got millions of likes. Oh, they must know a lot. Let me listen to them." No, nope, nope, nope, nope. That's something that's going to get your attention; it's designed that way.Lesley Logan 41:09  Yeah.Adrian Starks 41:10  How do they make you feel?Lesley Logan 41:12  Yeah.Adrian Starks 41:13  No, how do they make you feel? How do they sound when you listen to them? Could you listen to them all day? Could you listen to them in your times of need? How do they make you feel? That's the important thing of connection that we're missing today. We're so quick to look at the external, like, what has this person accomplished? Cool, then they're credible. Awesome, I'll follow. Awesome, I'll subscribe. Awesome, I'll comment.Lesley Logan 41:35  Yeah.Adrian Starks 41:35  They have a person over here, they may have a lot less, but they got a lot more to offer, and you're passing that up because you're just looking at numbers here. It's like I would encourage people that now is the time for us to find guidance that aligns with our purpose of being. And everyone, there's over how many people are on the planet right now? Lesley Logan 41:57  It's like 8 billion.Adrian Starks 41:58  8 billion people on a planet. I heard this stat one time. Out of 8 billion people, no matter what you do in life, 5% of people are not going to like you, they're not going to vibe with you, you're not going to connect with them. 5%. So, my math may be really off, I'm not going to even say it, but it's in the millions.Lesley Logan 42:20  Yeah.Adrian Starks 42:20  That you're gonna have a disconnect with people, no matter what you do. You could be well-polished, have everything together, and someone's gonna come around and be like, "Ah, they're phony." They're gonna talk some shit about you, because they just don't connect with you. They have no idea.Lesley Logan 42:35  Yeah.Adrian Starks 42:36  About your background, your pedigree, what you've done. They just want to.Lesley Logan 42:40  We all do it. We all do it, like you see something on your Instagram out of social, and you're like, just the first second, don't like it. Moving on.Adrian Starks 42:51  You move on. You're like, "Hey, I'm not interested in it. What is this? This is silly."Lesley Logan 42:57  Yeah.Adrian Starks 42:57  And that's part of us. We just have a natural sense of either we connect or we don't connect with certain things, and I think that in this time we're living in now, people are very overstimulated.Lesley Logan 43:07  Yes.Adrian Starks 43:08  There's so much information, there's so many solutions, there's so many offers, and we don't know where to look. It reminds you of like when you're sitting down and you have that night where it's a movie night, right? And you're just like, "Let me watch a movie, let me watch a TV show." And all of a sudden you got all these options, applications, and you're going from this application to this application, this application. Before you know it, it's like 30, 40 minutes later, and then you just give up and say, "You know what, damn it, just pick something, pick anything," because you're tired of looking.Lesley Logan 43:41  Yeah.Adrian Starks 43:41  And that's what's happening with us. We're just picking anything now we think is going to entertain us or bring us some type of joy.Lesley Logan 43:48  Yeah, because we can't handle being bored. Adrian, I could talk to you literally for more hours, but we do have to wrap this up. So we're gonna take a brief break, and then we're gonna find where people can find you, follow you, listen to your voice for many, many hours, and your Be It Action Items. Lesley Logan 43:59  All right, Adrian, where do you hang out? Where can they listen to your podcast?Adrian Starks 44:06  Okay, so you can listen to my podcast anywhere, pretty much. It's called Your Purposeful Life with Adrian Starks. And go to my website, adrianstarks.com. You can listen to the podcast from there. You can go to my YouTube channel, which has the videos. You can also listen to some audio, I have affirmations that I've been doing lately as well.Lesley Logan 44:25  Oh my god, do you have, if you don't, you should have a Patreon for affirmations because if people are paying for you to be a narrator, can you imagine every day you read me an affirmation or a mantra? I love that.Adrian Starks 44:39  I can do that, Lesley. Yes. They could go to adrianstarks.com. I just want to keep it simple for people, go to adrianstarks.com, all my social media handles are there, and you can just go wherever you choose and just be inspired and listen. And if you can, yeah, definitely subscribe to the podcast, it always helps. Share it whenever you can, but more importantly, just know this: that your purpose in life is not something you find, it's something that you do, and that is going to change, is going to evolve with time, and that's okay. Having self-doubt is okay, not knowing everything is okay. And now we live in a time where you're never too old, don't put an age on anything to start something new, or to pick up where you left off with something.Lesley Logan 45:27  Oh my god, those are Be It Action Items if I ever heard any. Like, you just led right in, and I'm obsessed with all of them. Great. Adrian Starks, I'm so happy we did this. We'll have to do this again. You'll have to be a person who keeps going back on, because you just have so much great wisdom. You guys, share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Share with a friend who's stuck on like, "What's my purpose?" They need to hear this, because it's like that Dr. Seuss book, like, Are You My Mother? You know, it's like that's not how you find it. It's got to be some self-reflection. So, thank you. We'll do this again, and until next time, my loves, Be It Till You See It.Lesley Logan 46:03  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 46:45  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 46:50  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 46:55  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 47:02  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 47:05  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this Fuck Yeah Friday episode, Lesley Logan pushes back on the assumption that looking busy means being unavailable, reframing healthy boundaries as a deliberate way to protect personal energy. She shares a proud team win from an intense season, celebrates listener milestones, and reminds new Pilates instructors that being a beginner is worth honoring, not hiding. The episode wraps with a grounding mantra to carry into the week ahead. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Lesley unpacks her annoyance at being told she's so busy.The boundaries behind the busy: her time, on her schedule.A team win from one of their most chaotic seasons.Community wins, from CEO-time checklists to month-two milestones.The beginner-not-imposter reframe every new instructor needs to hear.Episode References/Links:@on_point_pilates_studio – https://www.instagram.com/on_point_pilates_studio@_mariedecurtis – https://www.instagram.com/_mariedecurtisSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:48  Hello, Be It babe. How are you? Welcome to the Fuck Yeah Friday episode. These quick and dirty fun episodes, Brad said he's going to join me on them, and he will at some point. I think. They'll still be quick and dirty, but they're fun because we're just bringing a thing that we do from our communities into this, which is just that, instead of saying what inspired me from the internet this week, because the internet has been non-inspiring. Oh my god, I've made my algorithms just mostly beautiful nail designs, but somehow stupid shit keeps coming through. So we're keeping things light and fun, and if you're in our Agency community, which is where we business coach Pilates, instructors, or our eLevate community, which is where our internship program members are, then you will have this channel where you can complain about something that happened that day, and then you have to have a win immediately. So, since we already do wins here, just figured I'd also get to complain too, but I'll have a win afterwards. And you can send in your "I need a moment" and your win, but make sure you send in both, or just a win, because if you just send an "I need a moment," we will delete it. Okay. Lesley Logan 1:52  All right, so my moment is this, okay? I really don't like how people like to tell you how busy you are, because one, then I have to explain to them that I appear to be very busy, but I actually just have boundaries in place to protect my energy levels. And I love sharing that in a podcast format in a way that can help educate and give permission to people, but when it's a one-on-one situation, usually the people who are saying it are the ones who are kind of a little upset that they don't have you at their beck and call. And it's not that you don't have me, like you can't have me, you can absolutely have my attention and my time and my things, I just have boundaries for when that is due, when that can happen. And it's a little annoying because it makes when you say like, "Oh, you're so busy," it's like I'm in control of my day, my love. And so I guess my moment that I'm just, it's like I'm tired of people telling me how busy I am when I'm actually just organized and have boundaries in place, healthy ones. And sometimes I move them to do some things, and sometimes I can't move them to do some things, but I'm certainly not going to just move things around just so I'm available during the times that people want at their convenience, because it's not convenient for me. And guess what, you too are allowed to be busy, in air quotes, and have boundaries, and organized chaos, and then I have to fit myself into there, right? Like, we all get to do this, it's not just about me, we all can be like this. So that's what I'm a little irritated by this week, because I'm just tired of hearing it, and I'm tired of it being directed at like as if I don't want to spend time with someone, or I'm an asshole. No, no, I just know how much energy it takes to be me throughout the day, and I want to be me when you're with me. That's what I want. Lesley Logan 3:33  So, my win, you know, this win is going to be a bit of a team win, but I'm just really proud of our team. In the last couple of months, we've had a lot going on. We had a five-day website-not-working thing. We had one of our major team members end up needing to go into a hospital because of what's going on with their pregnancy. And then we had Brad and I gone for a month, and we had spring training, and we had the announcement of summer tour, and blah blah blah. And I will just say, like, while nothing went as planned, everything is going better, and I'm just really proud of the team and myself, like just really kind of sticking to the vision and the values, and sharing the wins with each other, and complimenting each other, and supporting each other, and stepping up for each other, and doing the best we can while we're down a person while they're on their amazing maternity leave. And I'm proud to say that, like, the wheels are still on the bus, the ship is still set to sail, and things are still going, and you really learn a lot about what is possible and what is going right, and what systems do you have in place. And instead of going, "Oh, what, we don't have a system for that?" it's like, "Oh wait, what happened?" Oh, just like just keeping their attitude and head on straight. And it's just, you know, so our win as a team is that, you know, six years of growing this team and putting systems in place have allowed us to be in a very intense season with a little bit more polite juggling than we want with one less person, but we're doing it and proud of us. And you know, this too shall pass, because that person's maternity leave won't be forever. Thank God. And I know we'll just celebrate when they come back, but I'm just really proud of what we've done. So that's my win. Lesley Logan 5:09  So now yours, you send them in to me. You can send them in to beitpod.com/questions. You can DM me on Instagram. Here we go. @on_point_pilates_studio has a couple, so personal practice has been strong, outside daily sunshine, and trained with my mentor on a one-to-one, and took a class, check, check. Admin wins: got a newsletter and a text blast out, submitted payroll to workers' comp, up to date. You know, it's nice when you get to do things for yourself, and you can check all the boxes of your CEO time. Way to go, Amanda. It was so fun to have you at the Pilates retreat as well, and I love that you are celebrating wins, both personal and professional. @_mariedecurtis: closed up my second month as a Pilates instructor. It still feels unreal, like a dream. Oh my god, I love that you're celebrating two months. I love it. I just had somebody Slack and say, "Well, I've only been teaching a little bit, so I feel like such an imposter," and it's like, yeah, because you're a beginner. You're not an imposter, you're just a beginner, and you should be a beginner, and a lot of us should be a beginner, and that will allow you to help your clients be beginners. And why is it bad to be a beginner? Not. So, congratulations, congratulations on your two months as a Pilates instructor. Thank you for letting us celebrate that with you. Lesley Logan 6:22  And now let's get a mantra for you to close out this week: I believe in myself fully. I believe in myself fully. I believe in myself fully. All right, loves, you know what to do until next time. Be it till you see it. Have a good day. Lesley Logan 6:40  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 7:23  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 7:28  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 7:32  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 7:39  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 7:42  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In part two of the Stuck Series, Lesley Logan unpacks why feeling stuck rarely has anything to do with a lack of motivation and what's really keeping you frozen. She breaks down how mismatched systems, unrealistic expectations, and unspoken fear quietly drain your energy, and offers a practical framework for moving forward. Find out how messy action, not motivation, is what finally gets you unstuck. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The role outsourcing and systems play in getting unstuck.How motivation is fickle and why you can't rely on it.Why mismatched expectations vs. reality requires a rebuildNaming the fear underneath the freeze, plus building a backup plan.Tactile tools: two-minute rule, friction reducers, and messy action.Episode References/Links:The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin - https://a.co/d/0fgVJtiKTiny Habits by BJ Fogg - https://tinyhabits.comEp. 613 Habit Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep613Ep. 614 Habit Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep614Ep. 616 Habit Series 3 - https://beitpod.com/ep616Ep. 617 Habit Series 4 - https://beitpod.com/ep617Ep. 619 Habit Series 5 - https://beitpod.com/ep619Ep. 620 Habit Series 6 - https://beitpod.com/620Ep. 622 Habit Series 7 - https://beitpod.com/ep622Ep. 623 Habit Series 8 - https://beitpod.com/623Ep. 256 with Rory Vaden - https://beitpod.com/ep256Ep. 688 Outgrowing Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep688Ep. 689 Outgrowing Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep689Ep. 93 with Jillian Flodstrom - https://beitpod.com/ep93Ep. 589 with Brad Bizjack - https://beitpod.com/ep589Cambodia Retreat Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.comSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Taking the action, taking an action that helps get you unstuck, is the antidote to fear, and it brings clarity. Action brings clarity. That's the hardest thing about all of this, is we're all waiting for motivation, or for us to just like wake up one day unstuck, but truthfully, we have to take a step, take some messy action to actually get unstuck. Lesley Logan 0:21  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:04  Hi, Be It babe, welcome back. We're back on our stuck series, so we're getting unstuck today. So last episode we actually talked about what does feeling stuck actually feel like, and is it actually that we're stuck? And we kind of realized that we're not stuck, right? We might just be overwhelmed or lacking support or tools to get to where we want to go. We might have overwhelmed ourselves, or we might be putting pressure on ourselves, and that might be why we're feeling this way. It might be like being a perfectionist again. Sometimes it sneaks back up on us, right? So, the one thing that I hear people say that they need when they're feeling stuck is motivation, and we have to talk about motivation, because motivation is not the thing. Lesley Logan 1:37  I used to think that I'm just a super motivated person. When I was younger, I was like, "Oh my god, if I said I was gonna do something, I do it," right? And what you realize when you read The Four Tendencies book by Gretchen Rubin, you discover like, "Oh no, that's just a tendency I have." If I say I'm gonna do something, I do it, whereas other people need an accountability partner, or some people need to be able to make decisions. I'm gonna do what I said to do. So, as I got a little bit older and a bit in the stage of my life where I was running my businesses and there were things going on and I was struggling to do them, I thought, "Oh my god, I just need motivation to work on that." And because of the ADHD brain, I was probably just seeking dopamine hits, and that's how I was getting things done. As I worked on myself and got to know myself and stopped overwhelming and overloading myself with things to do, I actually just became a person who was, I don't know, whelmed. It wasn't motivation that I needed, but systems to help me continue to do the things that I said I wanted to do, and also with systems, making sure that I wasn't saying yes to things just because they were cool. Lesley Logan 2:41  So because I know me better, I have better boundaries, and because I understand how motivation works, I don't actually wait for the motivation to do the things. I understand how to set myself up so I can take one step at a time, celebrate what I did do, and then go again the next day. I'm no longer a person who's like, "I have to get my to-do list done every day," because that pressure actually slows me down, and it makes me not feel like I'm me doing the thing, right? I'm not a patient person. So, in case you're like, "Oh, I wish I was you," I'm not a patient person. So, if I can do it, if I can take action on the things that I want to do, if I can help myself move the needle one millimeter forward in a day, you can do it too, right?Lesley Logan 3:27  Because we don't need motivation. And if you didn't hear our episodes in December of 2025 about habits, where I talked about motivation as a very fickle girlfriend, and you can learn more about this in BJ Fogg's book, Tiny Habits, but essentially motivation is needed when something is very difficult to get started. Like when you turn on a car, you have a starter, right? I think that's what it is, and it helps get the car started. You also use more gas to get the car started, right? Planes are the same thing. And so you need motivation to get rolling, but then once you're rolling, you don't use as much gasoline, as much energy, or you don't need those things, right? So, motivation is best to be used when something is a bigger deal, or is going to require more of us than we are used to, but then once we have gotten started, ideally we're not waiting on motivation to just keep the ball rolling. That's where systems come into place, right? Lesley Logan 4:21  Motivation also is not something you can just go up, tap in, hit the motivation button, "I'm ready to go." Motivation is actually a fickle friend. It's kind of like my ADHD focus mode without Adderall. Yes, sometimes it hits, and I'm like, "Oh my god, I just got so much done," but mostly it doesn't ever hit at the time that I want it to hit. It's not going to hit because something's due tomorrow; it hits because of my ADHD, but it won't hit like, "I want to do it now and not under pressure." It doesn't hit then, right? So I can't wait for it. I talked about this in our habit series, motivation, you have to think of as like a really great friend that you go to parties with, but that you don't actually rely on to pick you up at an airport to take you to an important meeting. You would never do that. Lesley Logan 5:03  So, if the tasks that you are asking yourself to do don't match your energy, you are likely doing things that do not bring you joy, and if they did before, they don't now. Oftentimes we're doing things that we think we should be able to do, or we think we have to do, or we don't have the money to delegate it out, but just because you have done that before doesn't mean you have to keep doing it. What I will just say is part of getting out of a rut is looking at the responsibilities you feel you are supposed to be the person to take those on and actually ask yourself, "Is this something that I need to be doing? Does this have to be done right now? Does it have to be done today?" Because it may be time to outsource some of the things that you need to happen in your life, so that you can have the time and energy to do what you said you wanted to do. Lesley Logan 5:56  If you come on my retreats, oftentimes I'm like, "Hey, we can outsource. You can have groceries delivered. You can just save all your time driving to the grocery store, going up and down the aisles. You could just have them delivered. You can have a housekeeper clean your house, right, especially for the deep cleans." But honestly, we have that every week. Why? Because one, I like a clean house, because I want to work in that environment, but I don't like to clean the house. Because I don't like to clean the house, it makes me exhausted when I do it, and then it's done, I have this clean house now. Guess what? I don't want to work in it because I'm exhausted. So the tasks that you have on your plate don't match the energy, and then they're draining you, and that makes you feel stuck. So you can come on a retreat with me in Cambodia to learn how to figure out what you should get off of your list, but if you don't want to wait till that, I just want you to take a look.Lesley Logan 6:43  What are all the things that you think you should be doing? Are there tools now that would make those things easier? Pick the one that you least want to do, you avoid doing, and that lives rent-free in space in your head, right? How can we get rid of it, or get someone else to support us on that? Your systems that you're relying on often aren't matching the brain that you operate with. I have ADHD, and in order to get my work done, I have support from a psychiatrist. So, I do take an Adderall, and when I take it, I actually can focus, and then I can actually use the tools that I have put in place to help me get my work done. I definitely can tell days when I have it versus when I don't. I don't take it on my days off, but I can tell that trying to do the things that I need to get done on a workday without it, I end the workday more exhausted and wondering, "Why do I do what I do? Am I doing the right thing? Am I aligned? Do I even love this job anymore?" because it took so much out of me to get it done than when I have the support that my brain requires, right?Lesley Logan 7:46  But whether or not you have ADHD, the more you can understand how you think, how you operate, and have systems that match that, you know? If you are making to-do lists and never using them, then that's not helping you. You need to figure out a different tool. If you are making the projects that you have to do on your to-do list so big "build a website" of course, you're gonna feel stuck. That's a humongous task that will not get crossed off for four to six weeks at least. So we have to figure out, what are the ways that you operate? How do you meet expectations? I mentioned it before, but Gretchen Rubin's book, The Four Tendencies, is an excellent read. It helps you understand how do you meet the expectations you have, or that others have, and then when you know that, you can put systems in place. Lesley Logan 8:24  For example, Brad is a rebel, and Brad will say, "Oh, I'm going to get up early tomorrow and do yoga." Okay, but if I wake him up and go, "Hey, you wanted to get up early this morning and do yoga," he will say, "No, I don't want to do it," because he wants to have choice. He must have choice, right? Because he's a rebel, that's how you meet the expectations. So, if I say, "Hey, babe, yesterday you had mentioned that you wanted to get up and do some yoga, so did you still want to do that, or did you want to sleep for a little longer?" When I present it to him like that, he always is like, "Oh, no, I'm going to do the yoga," because he does want to do it, but he wants to have choice, right? If you're an obliger, you are someone who needs accountability to get things done, so you need to find ways in your systems to have accountability to get things done, so you get them done. I'm an upholder, so if I said it I'm going to do it, which is also why if I say no to you, it's not because I don't love you, it's because I know I won't be able to get it done. I will never backtrack on an agreement, right? So if your systems don't match how you operate, then you are going to get stuck and overwhelmed. Lesley Logan 8:25  Okay, another way to get out of the rut is matching your expectations with reality, so you're not unmotivated, you're mismatched. Like if you have an expectation like, "Okay, tomorrow I'm gonna get up early. I know I'm not a morning person, but I'm gonna get up early, and I'm gonna go run two miles." But one, you're not a morning person, and you haven't run in a year. You're not doing those things, and that's going to feel like, "Oh my god, I just wasn't motivated." No, you are not that person. You are not someone who wakes up early. You are not someone who runs.Lesley Logan 9:57  So we actually have to make sure that the expectations that we have placed on ourselves actually match the reality of what systems we have in place today, right? So, if you're like, "I want to make 10,000 a month with my business," but you're not even making 1,000 a month, those expectations don't match reality. You actually have to first make 1,100, and 1,200, 2,000, and then 5,000. You can have the goal that "I want to make 10,000 a month," but you can't do it next month if you have never done it before, right? They don't match reality, so you basically have put pressure on yourself and overwhelmed yourself, and put yourself in a stuck position. Versus if you took time to go, "Okay, what are some realistic expectations that I can place on myself that I can do this week, and then I could do tomorrow and I can do today?" working backwards, then you actually don't need motivation; you'll have broken things down in a way that allows you to get them done. Lesley Logan 10:51  So, I will say, like the ADHD, we talked about this a moment ago, but yes, it has that super focus mode, but like the motivation, we can't wait for it. So what I highly recommend to my ADHD people is you really can't lean on motivation. You can't wait for those focus modes. You have to learn your brain, and you have to learn the systems that help you. And there are some great experts out there. You know, Brad piles the mail all in this one place, so every day we pick up the mail, that's a win for an ADHD couple, and we put it in a pile. We don't put it anywhere, we put it in a pile, and then on Mondays he actually goes through it, right? That's the system that works. I mean, you'd be surprised, I know you think you don't operate well with systems, but when you get the systems that work for you, they work for you, and so it really helps you remain unstuck and not leaning on motivation or focus mode to help you like clean everything. Because what we know you're gonna do is organize a cupboard and then not have cleaned anything, and now we have a messier kitchen. I know. Hello, I know me. Lesley Logan 11:49  Fear is another real reason to feel stuck. So, if you're listening to this because the outgoing episode really got your attention, you've outgrown an old version of yourself, but you're feeling stuck right now because of fear, fear of loss, fear of responsibility, fear of failure. Right, that's real. It's real, and it's important that we don't diminish the fear that we have. If that is what the problem is, because anyone telling you there's nothing to be afraid of, it's not helpful, right? It's like someone telling me like, "Calm down." You're like, "Do you want to see me calm down?" So, what I know about fear in the studies that I've done on it, the really important things that you can do is, one, call it out. What are you afraid of? What are you afraid is going to happen? If you don't want to say it out loud, write it down. If you don't know what it is, but you know there's a fear there, then just keep writing until it comes out, right? What is this thing that I'm afraid is going to happen? "I'm afraid no one's, everyone's gonna... no one's gonna like me." No one is gonna like you. And then you're like, "Why am I afraid about that? Why do I think that's gonna happen?" right? Like, take some time to really understand why you have this fear, because if you can actually identify it, then we can create an exit strategy, right? A backup plan. Because the truth is that nothing ever is as bad as or as good as we want or fear. "Oh my god, if I do this thing, I'm gonna die." Well, that's not happening, because you just listened to this. "Oh my god, if this goes so well, I'm gonna have a million dollars." Well, maybe you do, but most of the time we land somewhere on a spectrum, and so take some time to like really truly go, "What am I actually afraid of?" Lesley Logan 13:22  So you can have a backup plan, so then you can move forward, right? Because these practical shifts, they actually help, because an all-or-nothing mindset is what's keeping you stuck, right? Like, this practical... like, "Okay, I'm afraid that if I do this thing, I'm gonna lose everything." You're gonna lose everything, okay? All of it. Like, if this thing goes wrong, you're not gonna have any of this to back up on? Then you start to realize, "Well, no, actually, I'll just lose $1,000. I'll lose $3,000." Okay, that's a legit fear. I don't want to lose $3,000 ever. I don't want to lose $3. So, what things can help me realize if I'm on the wrong path? What are some signs or KPIs that could help me before it goes the wrong way, so I could stop it and turn the ship around? Or if that does happen, then what will I do? Because when you have that, all of a sudden you have clarity. Because get this: action is the antidote to fear. Taking the action, taking an action that helps get you unstuck is the antidote to fear, and it brings clarity. Action brings clarity. That's the hardest thing about all of this: we're all waiting for motivation, or for us to just wake up one day unstuck, but truthfully, we have to take a step, take some messy action to actually get unstuck. Lesley Logan 14:35  So, I did want to give you guys a couple of tactile things, like some "be it" things. So, one is like a two-minute rule. Sometimes a two-minute rule can be, "I can feel this way for two minutes and I'm gonna get started," or "I can do this thing over here in two minutes at a time, or I'll get started." That's helpful. Also, you can break down all the tasks you want to do into two minutes. We had Jillian Flodstrom on as a guest, and I think she said it in the podcast, but she might have done it in a webinar for us. Anyway, you should listen to her episode. She said like, "I break all tasks into something I can do in two minutes, because that makes it really easy. I'm waiting two minutes, I can do one thing. Okay, I can do this next thing," right? Lesley Logan 15:08  Reducing friction, so this is going to be just like taking a moment to see how many things that you have going on that are actually causing friction in your life. Are you trying to get too much stuff done in a day, or in a morning? Are you trying to be a morning person? How can we reduce that friction, so that it's just a little easier to get things done, right? Maybe it's the deadlines that you placed on yourself. How can you do that? Or perhaps it's like, "Okay, I cook for everybody all week long, but I just can't." Okay, how do we ask for help? So, just reduce the friction. And this is crazy, I know some people at the Be It Till You See It podcast are gonna say this, yeah, lower your expectations. Lower expectations of yourself, especially because sometimes we set the bar at 150%. Honey, you can be at 100% and you're still gonna slay more than most people. Most people don't take action. Most people have the same thoughts every single day. So, if you could just actually operate on an actual scale of 100%, not 150%, you would be unstuck tomorrow, yesterday, right? Because you don't need to do the whole thing, you don't need to be able to do all the things that will help get you unstuck.Lesley Logan 16:19  You just need to begin to do one thing, take one step. And I said this already a couple of times, take this messy action, because if motivation isn't the thing that's going to get us moving, because it's not, I mean, it might get us started on something really difficult, but it's not going to be the day-to-day, then what we actually need is messy action. And you hear that in every intro of all of our podcasts: "take messy action." And the reason is because you get some good feedback. So we will have some messy action episodes coming up for you soon in a future series, but until then, I'd love for you to take a moment, maybe revisit the first episode, and really identify like, "Am I actually stuck or am I in overwhelm, or do I have outdated systems, or do I just need a little bit of clarity to get started on this next thing? Or am I afraid?" Once you have identified how you're stuck and what's going on, you can take the first next steps to anything, and that means being it until you see it. Lesley Logan 17:17  All right, my loves, send this to a friend who needs to hear it. Thank you so much for being you. Send in any questions or aha moments at beitpod.com/questions, and until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 17:27  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 18:10  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 18:14  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 18:19  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 18:26  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 18:29  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this first installment of the Stuck Series, Lesley Logan, Pilates coach and host of Be It Till You See It, breaks down what feeling stuck actually means and why so many of us misdiagnose it. She offers a clearer way to read those frustrating in-between moments, when the old isn't working, and the new hasn't fully clicked yet. Tune in to find out why motivation isn't what will get you unstuck. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The difference between being stuck, overwhelmed, or just outgrowing yourself.How identity lag traps you between your old and new self.Why the habits that kept you safe as a kid now keep you stuck.Why your brain isn't broken when ADHD makes you feel stuck.How to reframe stuck as recalibration so you keep moving forward.Episode References/Links:GA Practical Wedding by Meg Keene - https://a.co/d/00zpWr2nEp. 688 Outgrowing Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep688Ep. 689 Outgrowing Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep689Ep. 613 Habit Series 1 - https://beitpod.com/ep613Ep. 614 Habit Series 2 - https://beitpod.com/ep614Ep. 616 Habit Series 3 - https://beitpod.com/ep616Ep. 617 Habit Series 4 - https://beitpod.com/ep617Ep. 619 Habit Series 5 - https://beitpod.com/ep619Ep. 620 Habit Series 6 - https://beitpod.com/620Ep. 622 Habit Series 7 - https://beitpod.com/ep622Ep. 623 Habit Series 8 - https://beitpod.com/623Ep. 256 with Rory Vaden - https://beitpod.com/ep256Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Stuck is not a personality trait. It is not something that represents who you are. You're not a stuck person, but it is a moment of misalignment, and it does mean that we have to get in there like a mechanic would to see what is the actual problem.Lesley Logan 0:14  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:57  All right, Be It babe. As promised, we have a series on what to do when we're stuck. How do we be it till we see it when we are feeling stuck? And I guess the question is to be like, are we saying this like, "I feel stuck right now," or do you have ideas and you have goals, but you're just not taking action steps? Lesley Logan 1:13  To get into the stuckness, we have to kind of just talk about what is being stuck, right? And how often are we calling this out on ourselves? Because if it's just been a few unproductive days, are you actually stuck? Are you overwhelmed? Right? Did you miss a goal, and that's why you're saying you're stuck, or are you stuck because you don't know how to take the next step? And that's perfectly okay. Lesley Logan 1:33  I actually think that sometimes we're stuck because we've done all that we can do on our own, and we need support, and we need help. Are you saying you're stuck because you're comparing yourself to someone else? So the important thing here is you didn't wake up stuck. You might have been labeling yourself as stuck, and I think that we have to identify what kind of stuck are we? The labeled version that we're stuck because we're comparing ourselves to others, or the reality that we've gone as far as we can and we need help, we need to ask for that. Lesley Logan 2:00  So we kind of thought about this because we've had some great questions come in, and we had some great guests and some wonderful talking points, and it's like, okay, I've done all these things, but I'm kind of stuck on this next thing. And so just thought, well, it'd be fun, let's talk about the outgrowing theory. Because sometimes we are working when we have outgrown ourself, and we are taking action to be the next version of ourselves, and we're working on being it until we see it, we can get stuck. I mean, you've evolved, right? You have new awareness, new understandings, new dreams, new ways of how you want to operate the system that is who you are, right? And you are letting go, or trying to, of the person that you once were, and sometimes when we're in that in-between, we get stuck, right? Lesley Logan 2:40  You ever done the update on your phone, and then things don't work the way they were supposed to, and the old way is not really functional either, but the new way you're going like, "Were the buttons moved over here? Hold on, why are the buttons over here now?" Some of them get stuck because we went looking for where the old buttons were, but they're in the new button setting, and so when you're in that stuck place, it can be full frustrating, and I just want you to know you're not alone. I often get stuck in some things. I will just say, "I feel really stuck right now." All of a sudden, my brain goes, "Hold on, are we stuck? We got this." Lesley Logan 3:15  So, what stuck actually is, I think it's important that we talk about what is it. Like an identity lag? Maybe we know where we want to grow and do and be, but we aren't feeling like we're there yet. By the way, I just want you to know, as a habits coach, one of the hardest things you can do is change habits that are psychological. Like if you have a habit of talking negatively about yourself, you don't want to do that anymore. It's really one of the hardest habits to unravel, and so it's not surprising to me that when we are wanting to be a more positive person, or a more joyful person about the things we do, and see more possibility, and ask for more help, because of the things we have to do in our brain to become the new person, it's easy for us to hang back in the old system, in the old ways, and have this identity lag, like, I want to be here, but I'm still feeling I'm over here. Lesley Logan 4:06  We can be stuck because our nervous system is just overwhelmed, right? I think a lot of us take on a lot of things, too much at one time. We have this all-or-nothing mentality in this world that we live in, and so we can actually get stuck because we're overwhelmed. I see this in some of the teachers in my eLevate program. They get stuck on what to do or what to study next, because they're trying to be perfect at all of the things, rather than just being in their body and acknowledging where they're at.Lesley Logan 4:37  We also get stuck when there's just too many options, and we don't have a clarity on what to do. Like, oh my gosh, you could do this, you could do that, you could do that. It's like, "I'm overwhelmed," and so then we feel stuck. Right? I remember we were planning our trip to Europe, we were like, "What do we want to do?" and it's like we have nine days, we could do anything. Europe is big, and I haven't been to so many places, and I could go to this place, or I go to that place. And I was just so overwhelmed that I felt stuck, and we didn't even plan the whole vacation until kind of right before, because we had to just get clear on, okay, hold on, what is it that we want to do? Lesley Logan 5:12  You know, when we were planning our wedding, we got recommended a great book called A Practical Wedding, and she was talking about all these different questions you can ask yourself, so you can really take the overwhelm out of the wedding planning and actually take action on what you're going to do. But a lot of people get stuck in that because there's just too many options. And we can get stuck when our old systems and our old habits just don't work anymore, right? My goodness, the way our bodies work in our 20s versus how in our 40s, ladies, you could be doing the things that used to make you feel good and used to make you feel energized, and now they just don't work anymore, and so you could just feel like you're in a rut. So it's important to take note that stuck is not a personality trait, it is not something that represents who you are, you're not a stuck person, but it is a moment of misalignment, and it does mean that we have to get in there like a mechanic would to see what is the actual problem. And sometimes that means troubleshooting.  Lesley Logan 6:10  In your stuckness, when you are stuck, it's important that we also take a moment to see how did we get here. Like a gentle, hold on, how do we get here? Right? Sometimes if you're road tripping and you get a little lost, you think, "Hold on. How did I make a wrong turn?" and backtrack a little bit, right? So, when you are trying to see how did I get here, one thing you cannot do is blame. That is not going to work, I promise you. We talked about that in the outgrowing series. You cannot shame and blame yourself into being unstuck, or it will actually just put you further in stuck rut mode, and you'll actually just feel bad about yourself at the same time. No one wants to do that. Lesley Logan 6:43  So we got to wherever we were because of so many things. One, how you are raised, what you're taught to focus on, what you caught that you should focus on, what you caught that you should behave like. For example, I definitely was rewarded as a child when I would do things that were like above and beyond to support people. So I just would go above and beyond all the time, and I would say yes to things without even asking myself if I want to be doing this, and I would just put myself out there to help people all the time. Because I would help my mom, I would help other people, I would get all these affirmations, words of affirmation, my love language, and I would then get to feel seen. "Oh my gosh, this is Lesley. She does all these amazing things for us," and so then, as an adult, without thinking about how these yeses would make me feel, I would just say yes all the time, right? So I got myself to overwhelm and stuck several times in my adult life because I was doing the things that helped me feel safe and seen as a child. These are things that you don't even realize you're doing. It takes therapy to look back and see, how did I get here? How do I keep working for the same type of person? How do I keep dating the same type of person? How do I keep ending up with friends who are all the same? Right? It's because of how we are making decisions and taking actions, and it's all based on things that were put into our systems, our system updates, when we were growing up. And so really, when you can figure that out, it's really empowering, right? Lesley Logan 8:09  Because of that, when we were children, we optimize for safety, not alignment. As a kid, we don't know what our goals are, right? So we do things that make us feel safe in the environment. So if you grew up in a place where when you were perfect, it felt like you could control the environment, then you would just be perfect all the time. "If I could just be perfect all the time, then no one's gonna yell and nothing's gonna get bad." But then what happens is, you just try to be perfect all the time, and that's exhausting, by the way. It's not in alignment with what you're wanting to do in your life. People are supposed to make mistakes, you're not gonna learn things that way, and of course, you're gonna feel stuck because you're like, "I should be able to do this," but you didn't get to make the mistakes along the way to help you learn how to do it. Lesley Logan 8:46  We also stay in things that work; we stay past expiration dates, right? We stay in them because there's certainty. So we get stuck often because it worked back then, so it's gonna work now, or, "I should be so grateful that I'm in this situation that I'm in. Other people have it worse." So sometimes we just stay because things work. So, if one of those things really goes, "Oh, that's kind of me, that's kind of why I get stuck," it's important that we don't say, "Oh, I've messed up, I messed up my whole life." No, I mean, that is like a thing. My gosh, my brain will catastrophize. Like when I became a Pilates instructor, and I met people who had been teaching Pilates longer because they're the same age as me-ish, but they learned about Pilates before, I remember going, "Oh my god, I've missed out on so many years that I could have been doing Pilates." Because the fact that I discovered Pilates at the age of 22, at the time when it was only four years legal to say the word Pilates, is amazing, and I'm over here going, "I messed up, I should have known about this sooner," right? But we didn't mess up. We built our lives around what worked until they don't work anymore, and now the stuck feeling is just because things in your life don't work anymore. You've outgrown, and you're in the stuck mode because you're in this between, and we have to figure out what's going to work. Lesley Logan 10:11  And I'll never forget, in 2013 I was single, I wasn't couch-surfing anymore. At this point, I'd found the place I wanted to live, I was transferred, given more responsibility, blah blah blah, and somebody suggested that I do this birth chart, I don't know, futuristic, not psychic thing, because it's based on birth charts, but just get some astrological help. So I did this, and the person was like, "You have gone as far as you can on your own." And I was like, "What?" He's like, "Yep, you've actually done a great job, you've gone as far as you can on your own, and all the things that you are wanting to do in this life, you must do with other people." And that is something, by the way, I am not a person who asks for help. I just can do it all on my own, I've done it all on my own, I've moved myself multiple times in my life by myself. I can do it, right? But hearing that, I was like, "Oh, okay. So I built this life that has worked for me, and if I want to continue on, I'm going to need to get some help." And you know what? He wasn't wrong. Because here I had got a new place, decorated really beautifully, got promoted at my job and all this stuff, and I still felt like something is missing. It's missing, and so I started seeking out and looking for opportunities to partner up with different people, not necessarily in business, but just on projects and, oh, maybe I could hire that person to help me, right? Lesley Logan 10:12  Okay, so I do think before we continue on the stuck thing, we do have to chat a little bit about ADHD, right? We do need to talk a little bit about ADHD, and the reason is, my ADHD loves, we sometimes equate being stuck with just not having the dopamine high that we're constantly seeking. Okay, so as ADHD people, we often say yes to 17 things, because our brains think a mile a minute. We're three steps ahead of everybody, and we can take it all on, and also we like the dopamine highs. And what happens is, especially if you're in your 40s and you didn't know you had ADHD, at some point your systems no longer work. And not only as you go through perimenopause do you lose your hormone help there, but you already were lacking that in your ADHD brain, and so now you feel a little bit stuck and overwhelmed because your systems aren't working, and you said yes to a lot, and the systems that used to help you don't work. So we have to be thoughtful and kind to ourselves.Lesley Logan 10:12  If you are someone who's listening with ADHD, I highly recommend getting some help to understand how your brain works so that you can not only get unstuck and ditch the overwhelm, but truly learn how to work with it. It's not like me versus my ADHD brain at all, but it's like, okay, hold on, I know in order for me to do these things, I need these tools, so I need to set myself up for success. And I'll never forget, my psychiatrist said, "I can give you the drugs to help you focus, but if you keep saying yes to too many things, the drugs won't help. It's a you problem." And I really think that if you are feeling stuck right now because you're doing too many things, because your ADHD brain is like, "Yeah, I want that, and I want that, I want that dopamine hit, that dopamine hit," we need to find ways to pause or delete or delegate or delay some of the things that we're working on, and just be honest about that. Because your brain isn't broken; it's just overstimulated and undersupported, right? So we need tools. So if you're stuck because of ADHD, I see you. We'll get some experts on here, but also do take a moment to recognize what is the ADHD versus what is stuckness versus what is overwhelm, so that you're not labeling things that are inaccurate and then feeling more stuck because you don't have the tools to work because we got mislabeled, right?Lesley Logan 11:21  Okay, last thing I just want to say is I think if you are an oldest daughter who is listening to this, right, firstborn of anything, there is a tendency to do a lot and should on ourselves, like, "I should be doing more of this," or, "I used to be more productive, what is wrong with me that I can't do this anymore?" And I will just say that, one, we're not the person that we were 20 years ago, so yeah, I cannot take on the things that I did 20 years ago. Also, because I know better, I know what I am capable of, I know what I'm good at, I know more of what I want, I know more of what I don't want, and so please don't should on yourself—because we had Rory on our podcast and he said it makes you a should-head, right? So, you want to make sure that you are not stuck because of the extra pressure that you're putting on yourself. Life is hard enough, there's enough pressures. And while you used to be more productive, that doesn't mean you have to stay at that production level. We don't expect people who are older than us to produce at the same level that they did when they were 20. We're like, "Oh my god, you're retired, go be retired." That's the same for you. So, double-checking, are you stuck or overwhelmed because you're putting too much pressure on yourself about what you actually can handle at this moment? Lesley Logan 15:31  You know, do you have a schedule or tools? I mean, we live in a tech age, there's a lot of ways that we can get reminders and prompts, or get help. I mean, my goodness, if you're like, "I just wish I was a better cook," ChatGPT is actually fucking great for recipes. I'm not gonna lie, I don't cook, but Brad gets some good ones on there. So, if you're thinking that pressure creates movement, it doesn't. My ADHD people, I know that pressure—last-minute pressure, that procrastination—gets you feeling like, "I finally have the pressure I need to get going," but for a lot of us it actually just creates paralysis. That pressure just causes us to just, there's too much, I don't know what to do right now, and so you know, yeah, if you know how to use your pressure to get your work done, great, but if it's actually making you feel stuck, well, then it's no longer a good tool for us. Lesley Logan 16:25  So we're going to talk about stuck in our next episode, which is like, okay, how do we realign? Do we need motivation? Like, how do we actually get unstuck? We're going to do that, but before we do that, I just want to say, what if you're not stuck? What if you're just recalibrating? What if you are in process, and because you're in process, it requires unraveling of things that no longer work and testing things that will? You're not going to always get it right, so you might be like, "I no longer want to use this tool, do this thing, it's going to be this tool," and that tool doesn't work. You're like, "Well, now I'm stuck." No, you actually have information: this tool doesn't work. Why doesn't it work? That's information. And then you can find a new tool. "Oh, this tool, I like this, but not that." It's just information, so you're not stuck, you're recalibrating. You're not behind, you are in an update, right? You're not actually going backwards. When we're stuck, we think, "Oh my god, now I'm going backward." No, you're not. You're actually trying to figure out how do I take the next step forward, right? You ever been on a mountain on a hike, and you get to a place and you're like, "Wait a minute, do I go left or right? Do I go right?" Do you say, "I'm stuck?" No, you're like, "Hold on, let me check the map. Oh, I go this way. Okay, that's the right way." So, you're not stuck, you're not behind, you're in an update. And because you're not stuck, because this is a moment of misalignment or transition, then the real question does become like, how do we get unstuck? How do we move forward? Lesley Logan 17:58  And that's what we're talking about in the next episode, because a lot of people mistake that they're waiting for the motivation to get unstuck to help them, and as we talked about in our habit series, motivation, can't be motivation, cannot be, doesn't work that way. So, my loves, I'm super excited for this series. I hope it was really helpful. I'd love to hear what you're currently stuck on, because I can get a guest to help with that. Maybe you're stuck on tools and systems that could help you. Maybe you're stuck on a thought or an emotion or an experience, right? We'd love to hear from you. So, definitely send it into the beitpod.com/questions and your wins as well. Send this episode to a friend who might be saying that they are stuck, and hopefully the next episode supports them. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 18:43  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 19:25  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 19:30  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 19:35  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 19:42  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 19:45  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this Fuck Yeah Friday, Lesley Logan opens up about the unexpected magic of hitting restart on a stubborn laptop, on one-sided friendships, and on the way we show up for ourselves. She shares a recent vulnerability hangover from her appearance on Beyond the Reformer, and celebrates listener wins that prove small, brave moves create real momentum. This episode is a reminder that you are valuable, irreplaceable, and that's worth celebrating. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Why celebrating wins matters even when the world feels heavy.The unexpected wisdom of hitting restart when nothing else works.How being yourself creates a ripple effect that lasts for years.Why morning routines fuel presence in your biggest moments.Setting boundaries with people who take but never reciprocate.Episode References/Links:Beyond the Reformer – https://beitpod.com/beyondthereformer@jennvfitness - https://www.instagram.com/jennvfitness@inhalepilates252 - https://www.instagram.com/inhalepilates252@ploplates - https://www.instagram.com/ploplatesSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:48  Hello, welcome to Fuck Yeah Friday. Oh yeah, we're here, and we are having some fun. We are making some changes to the podcast, and I love it. And this one is that we get to have a moment, because the world's on fucking fire, but then we have to celebrate a win, just like our members have to do in Agency and eLevate. Agency is our Pilates business coaching for Pilates instructors and studio owners, and eLevate is my mentorship program and in both of those communities people can have a moment, but they have to immediately go to the Wins Channel and celebrate a win, because you don't get to vomit and then come back the next day and have a win. No, it isn't about toxic positivity, like someone died, but at least you got to work on time. It's not bad, but it's also just acknowledging that there's also something good happening. Lesley Logan 1:28  Sometimes the moment you want to need is like, "Uh, today I was fighting with my laptop and I did everything right. I'm like, let me check the Wi-Fi. Okay, that's on. Let me quit Dropbox. Okay, that's fine. Let me do this. Okay." And then it's like, "Okay, I'm just going to restart the computer." And then it worked. It's just like remember when you're a kid and the VCR wouldn't work, and you'd hit it three times, and it would? I just hate that the turning on and off is probably going to fix most things, because don't you think it should be more complicated than that? Don't we think? Anyways. All right. This is the world we're in. This is what we deal with, and sometimes the answer is just to hit restart. Lesley Logan 2:09  Now that we've hit restart, my win for the day is a couple months ago I did a recording for a podcast, and it's been out for a bit. Now that you're hearing this, it's Beyond the Reformer, and my win is I love the questions that the person asked. I know that's their work, but I really love the questions they're asking, because I did my morning routine, and because I took care of myself, I was able to be so present and answer them honestly and authentically. Those posts that she's pulled from that podcast are still going around today, over a month later, and people are loving them. They're giving people permission, and it's just so fun that I can do something like that, and then those words can live for years, so that people who need to hear them today versus a month ago versus next year can hear them, and it can hopefully change their Pilates career. So, if you want to take a listen, it's on Beyond the Reformer, and I dropped some truth bombs, just some good authentic stuff. I'm not gonna lie, I also had a vulnerability hangover afterwards, because I was like, "I fucking nailed that," and then I was like, "Did I say too much? What are people gonna think?" Lesley Logan 3:11  So, anyways, it was a great time, and I love how the more you're yourself, the more you can really make an impact. Yeah, you're gonna feel like, "Oh my god, was that the right thing to do?" but then it gets out there, and you're like, "Oh, it was the right thing to do," and then everyone loves it. Then there's one person who's an idiot, and you're like, "Okay, but you're the only one. You seem a little weird." So that's my win. I was myself, and I did something that has helped a lot of people today, even though it's been months later, so there's that. Lesley Logan 3:36  Okay, now I got a few wins from you guys, so remember, you can send your wins in to thebeitpod.com/questions. Okay, so here we go. Here are your wins. This is from @jennvfitness, "I printed flyers for a new class and distributed to the neighborhood all around the studio." Yeah, that can feel so scary, and it's like, "Yeah, but I have a new class I need people to hear about, and these people can walk here, so I'm gonna freaking tell them." Way to go, JV! Lesley Logan 3:59  @inhalepilates252, "OPC classes in two days, and showing up for a 10:00 p.m. live class, because why not?" I love you, Liz. And also, yeah, if you're like, "I'm awake, I'm not gonna go to sleep right now," you might as well move, and that's a fun thing to be in community. You get to move your body, you get to go, "I did two classes in two days." Way to feel so good about yourself! I believe in going to bed early, and then sometimes you just freaking can't. Why fight it? So, thanks for joining us. It was so fun. Lesley Logan 4:26  Okay, @ploplates, "I made the decision today to stop helping people who've never even offered to help me." Boom, mic drop. Lesley Logan 4:35  Love that. Love that. Sometimes you need boundaries, right? Especially like sometimes we're helping people, and we realize that we help the same people, and then when we need help, they never respond, and it's like, "Okay, so I love you, and that's cool. I'm happy to help, and then if you don't help me in return later on, I'm happy to go." Okay, well, it's not that I'm not a helpful person, but maybe someone else.Lesley Logan 4:59  All right. Your mantra for the week: I am valuable and irreplaceable. I am valuable and irreplaceable. Oh my god, you're valuable and irreplaceable, love. So go on and be it till you see it. Send your wins in, share it with a friend who needs to hear it. Sometimes it's nice to know you're not alone in your frustrations, but also be inspired about what could be a win. If you want longer episodes from us, make sure you check out our series every other week, and our interviews and recaps in the week between. We love supporting you on your journey to being the best version of yourself that you want to be on this planet, and help you overcome imposter syndrome and do fun things. So, thank you so much for listening. Until next time.Lesley Logan 5:41  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 6:23  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 6:29  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 6:33  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 6:40  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 6:43  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Lesley Logan 6:58  All right, and pull up, I think it's PLO Pilates, or maybe it's Pop Lot, oh, it's probably Pop Pilates. Okay, got it. Just watch my brain work. Okay, Pop Pilates.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Why Most Rental Investors Fail | Dani Beit-Or reveals the hard-earned lessons from more than 20 years of building wealth through rental properties. In this episode, Dani shares why so many investors get stuck in analysis paralysis, the mistakes that keep people from scaling, the importance of persistence and deal structuring, and the key milestones every investor must reach to achieve long-term financial freedom through real estate. _______________________________ If you want to learn how to run your business in 5 hours or less.... Go to https://www.5HourBusiness.com Subscribe to my YouTube channel:    / @tonyjavierbiz And if you're into flying and want to follow my Aviation journey, check out my other YouTube channel at    / @tonyjaviertv _______________________________ Follow me on Social Media: Tiktok -   / tonyjavier.tv Instagram -   / tonyjavier.tv Facebook Personal -   / tonyejavier Facebook Business -   / realtonyjavier ________________________________________ If you want to dominate your Real Estate Market with TV commercials, go here: https://www.ClaimMyMarket.com If you want to connect with me and my network, go to https://tonyjavier.com/connect If you want to check out Tony's Real Estate Resources and Vendors go to https://www.TonyJavier.com/resources ________________________________________ Tony is the owner of an INC 5000-rated Real Estate Investment Company. He has been featured in Bigger Pockets, Wholesaling INC, Steve Trang's Real Estate Disruptors, Joe Fairless' Best Ever Podcast, and many other top podcasts and platforms. When Tony is not working on his business, he enjoys flying his plane. You can see videos on that and how he uses airplanes to save money on taxes. Don't forget to like the video, comment, subscribe to my channel, and share this with a friend if I'm doing my job and providing value to you and your network. If I'm not doing my job please let me know in the comments how I can be better, your feedback is greatly appreciated. See you in the next video!

Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell break down what it actually looks like to leave a job with grace. In this episode, they unpack the candid conversation with New York City-based actress and novelist Clare Solly on why the employer-employee relationship doesn't require lifelong debt, how to keep your exit short and sweet, and what to do when getting fired feels deeply personal. They also dig into her biggest piece of advice: give yourself space before jumping into the next job. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How The Trevor Project's escape-key feature protects LGBTQ youth.Why the employer-employee relationship doesn't require lifelong debt.The two-sentence advice for exiting a job gracefully.Being fired is professional feedback, not personal failure.The importance of building a career exit strategy like a house fire plan.Episode References/Links:OPC – https://opc.meOPC Summer Tour – https://opc.me/toureLevate Mentorship Program – https://lesleylogan.co/elevateOPC Flashcards – https://opc.me/flashcardsBalanced Body - https://www.pilates.com/Contrology - https://contrology.pilates.com/The Trevor Project – https://www.thetrevorproject.orgThe Center Las Vegas (LGBTQ Center) – https://thecenterlv.orgThe Pitt (TV series) – https://www.max.com/shows/the-pittSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIf you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Brad Crowell 0:00  Yeah, the employer-employee relationship does not inherently require a lifelong debt, meaning that, of course, when you're working for someone, do everything anything that's part of your role, but you don't owe them your life.Lesley Logan 0:15  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:58  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the gracious convoy I had with Clare Solly in our last episode.Lesley Logan 1:06  If you didn't listen, you missed out on the third time. Clare Solly has been, she's one of few people who've been on three times.Brad Crowell 1:13  She is, but I think she's been on way more than that, because she's done recaps for me and all sorts of stuff. So, as a guest three times, yes, but longtime listeners will definitely know who Clare is. Clare and Lesley go way, way back, before I was in the picture, by like years.Lesley Logan 1:32  We go back to like 2001.Brad Crowell 1:33  But way, you go back to 2001? So, like, I think I was still, what? 2001 we were graduating from high school.Lesley Logan 1:45  I went to college in 2001 as well.Brad Crowell 1:48  That's when you met, your first year in college.Lesley Logan 1:50  Yeah, I got a job. I was broke.Brad Crowell 1:53  I was broke. Well, amazing. Yeah, well, anyway, I was listening to your pod, and the two of you are hilarious, because it's like blah-blah-blah, just 100% riffing off each other. Lesley Logan 2:13  See why people are like, "I'm going to pod my best friend, and we're just going to talk about things." Because inevitably something good is going to come out of it. Oh yeah, you said, "Be organized," to like, what are we talking about? Which is like, so we originally, the team was like, "Do we want her on the pod," and I was like, "What will we talk about?" And then she and I were like, doing whatever recaps it is, she's like, "We should talk about ending," whatever, it was, and I was like, "Okay, great," exiting, "The team will be thrilled to know that we have a topic."Brad Crowell 2:38  You picked a topic. Lesley Logan 2:39  We did it. You guys, just so you know, we love that you listen. We love that you share those with friends. Another way you can support this podcast is by being an OPC member. If you go to onlinepilatesclasses.com, you can actually check out what we do. We have real Pilates for real bodies, it's the workout that works for you. There's lots of different ways to do it, and people are often like, "How can I support this show?" And Brad and I have talked about, like, do we do a commercial-free one where people pay?Brad Crowell 3:04  Yeah, we thought about that, like having a second one that's no ads, like all these different things.Lesley Logan 3:08  No, we're not doing more work. What actually would be really meaningful for us is, if you're going to give us money, we want you to actually get something out of it, not just like listening to us take up space. We really want you to actually take time for yourself and move your body, and that's what OPC is all about. It's actually about you having time for yourself. The classes are 2% of your day, and you get to compare yourself to yourself. So, go to OPC, I guess, what do they do? Go to opc.me/40?Brad Crowell 3:34  Just go to opc.meLesley Logan 3:36  Oh, great. Do that, even easier. Okay. Today is June 11th and it's Certified Nurses Week, aka CNA Week. It takes place on Thursday of the second full week of June. I really do love.Brad Crowell 3:50  The Thursday of the second full week.Lesley Logan 3:53  I love when it's not.Brad Crowell 3:54  Of the month of June.Lesley Logan 3:55  It can't be, it can't be the second Thursday. It has to be the second Thursday, the Thursday of the second full week.Brad Crowell 4:01  Yeah.Lesley Logan 4:01  So, Thursday can't be, it can't be the eighth ever. Brad Crowell 4:04  Because if the week starts on a Wednesday, that first Thursday does not count. If the month's first week starts on a Wednesday, or like not a full week, right? Then the first Thursday might not count.Lesley Logan 4:17  Right. Brad Crowell 4:17  Right. So, the Thursday of the second full week. Lesley Logan 4:22  I think that's complicated. Instead of saying. Brad Crowell 4:27  Because there might not be a second Thursday.Lesley Logan 4:29  But what they, well, they could just say the second Thursday of June.Brad Crowell 4:31  No, it might not be the second Thursday.Lesley Logan 4:33  No, if June 2nd is a Thursday, then June 9th is a Thursday, that's the second Thursday. I think they made it complicated.Brad Crowell 4:40  But that wouldn't be it, it would be on the next week.Lesley Logan 4:42  So, listener, hold on, you mean to tell me that people don't grab the 30-day calendar and go one, two?Brad Crowell 4:52  Not necessarily, if it's not a full week, that's the caveat here.Lesley Logan 4:56  I think that's crazy. I'm telling you, I always, when we do FYS, I don't go skipping the first Friday because it wasn't a full week, I do all the Fridays.Brad Crowell 5:08  I am with you on this. I am agreeing with you. This is not simple.Lesley Logan 5:12  It's not simple to be a CNA either. So, it takes place on the second full week of June. Do you like that? Like that lead back, is a week full of, oh, because they also want a week. Okay, notice.Brad Crowell 5:26  It's a full week.Lesley Logan 5:26  It's a full week of celebrations, but it starts on a Thursday, it's a full week of celebrations honoring the hard work. Do you all want to know why I think I'm ADHD? Here's the autism. I'm so stuck on this second Thursday. This year it is held from June 11th to June 17th. Certified nursing assistants began working under the Red Cross program during World War One, and have served alongside US Army nurses. Hundreds of young women were trained to care for wounded soldiers in reserve, field-based, and civilian hospitals. Did you know that before 1987 nursing assistants were not required to have a formal education?Brad Crowell 6:01  I did not know that.Lesley Logan 6:03  Okay, so who's seen The Pit? Because there's actually a whole episode on the medics. Did you know that?Brad Crowell 6:08  Well, this is why I was asking you what the name of the show is that you're watching right now. I yelled it across the house earlier when I was like, "What's that show called?"Lesley Logan 6:15  I'm hyper-vigilant, but okay. One, I'm not new to The Pit. It's already like, I don't know, filming season three or something like that, and won many awards. All of my friends talk about it week after week when it first came out.Brad Crowell 6:26  But you're new to it.Lesley Logan 6:27  I'm new to it, because as much as I appreciate the nostalgia of a weekly show that we all talk about, I don't have that capacity. If I'm going to sit down and watch a show, I want to binge through, like I really like that I can, and all that stuff anyways, because I won't. The next week I'll forget, and then I'll be like, spoiler alerts that I'm trying not to watch, like when Love is Blind was dropping in increments. I'm like, "Fuck, I have to get off my Instagram, because the spoilers are coming." So, because it's spoiled, and I didn't pay attention to it because it wasn't what I was clicking on, I saw on a plane yesterday, I watched 10 episodes in a row, I'm obsessed, and the head nurse is like kicking ass. But they did have a whole episode on this guy talking about what the first field medicals were and how they became one. Anyways, I also believe, maybe it wasn't the nurses, that might have been the women who were doing the phone lines, but they had to pay for their own uniforms and things like that, so there's all this different stuff. Anyways, you guys, we have a nursing shortage in the United States of America because it sucks to work in healthcare. The only people making money in healthcare is CVS and the insurance companies. This is not sponsored by them, but you know they've got the money, so come on over. So the reality is, please be kind to your nurses, we need every single one of them. I know it's frustrating when you have to go to, I wasn't even at the hospital, I was at a doctor's office, and they make me fill out this online check-in sheet every single time. I have to fill in my allergies, my first period, my family stuff, every single time. And the second time I went in a month, I said, "Hey guys, is there any way where I can just tap a box that says nothing has changed, everything is the same, there's zero. Brad Crowell 8:12  I just felt that I wasn't filling it out.Lesley Logan 8:14  Yeah, like the only thing that's different is my last cycle. I'll give you that, because it's a female doctor, anyway. But I said, "Look, I'm not trying to, I'm just here." But be nice to them, be nice to them, it is their CNA week, so go.Brad Crowell 8:29  So, there are apparently on average 190,000 annual openings for registered nurses each year, projected through 2032.Lesley Logan 8:42  Wow.Brad Crowell 8:43  Due to retirements, burnouts, and rising care demands. And while the workforce is growing, it cannot keep pace with the needs of an aging boomer population.Lesley Logan 8:54  Oh, this boomer population, man, they just, love you, because some of you are boomers, but, man.Brad Crowell 9:00  Yeah. So, anyway, nurses are very important, and it's a high-stress job, so all the props to the nurses out there.Lesley Logan 9:10  Yeah, okay. Upcoming travel notes, you guys, we're around, we're sticking.Brad Crowell 9:14  Yeah, we're home for a minute, and it's nice.Lesley Logan 9:17  Kind of at home. Although, although, when you're watching this, what day is this? Brad Crowell 9:21  We are June 11th.Lesley Logan 9:22  Oh, yeah. No, I'm home, solidly in the house.Brad Crowell 9:25  June and July, we're home.Lesley Logan 9:27  We might even foster a puppy or something like that.Brad Crowell 9:29  Yeah, we're gonna go take some dogs and hikes. We're rebuilding the van right now.Lesley Logan 9:34  We means Brad.Brad Crowell 9:35  We means Brad. Brad is rebuilding the van right now from the inside out, obviously.Lesley Logan 9:40  Well, the outside's done.Brad Crowell 9:41  Yeah. Well, not necessarily. Well, actually, I guess I'm adding a roof rack and I'm adding all the solar and all this extra stuff. So, like, we're getting fancy, and I got some really cool specs done for the interior, and we're, we're gonna be completely overhauling it before the summer tour, which is coming up, so tickets are definitely available. You can go to opc.me/tour we're actually going to be doing a Saturn's ring loop around the middle of the country, like Lesley said last week, which I thought was hilarious.Lesley Logan 10:08  Oh, just so you know, our tours are again sponsored by Balanced Body and Contrology, so we're also bringing the Contrology Reformer, Mat and Spine Corrector. Brad Crowell 10:17  We sure are. Lesley Logan 10:17  They all have some great prizes for you. I put another request in for the liner, because everyone loves it. It's so fun, easy to take with you. It's a really great community, and it's time, and you also can go to multiple locations on this tour, because we are on a status ring, but that also means, since the map isn't 3D, we're really just, you know.Brad Crowell 10:37  Okay, okay. I think they got the idea. The point is, we're going in a circle.Lesley Logan 10:41  Stops are within a couple of miles.Brad Crowell 10:42  It's a squeeze circle.Lesley Logan 10:43  It's a squeeze circle,Brad Crowell 10:44  Yeah, a couple of hours, several stops within a couple of hours, not a couple of miles.Lesley Logan 10:48  A couple of hours.Brad Crowell 10:49  But anyway, the go to opc.me/tour we're doing 14, I think it's 14 stops, and we're.Lesley Logan 10:55  I have no idea, it's not we're going to this, I haven't even seen the list.Brad Crowell 10:58  It's good, it's gonna be great, we're excited, we're visiting some new spots, revisiting some old spots, and can't wait to see everyone. So, if you want to come have a Pilates party with us, join us on tour. And then, if you're new here, Lesley teaches a mentorship program for teachers, it's called eLevate, and we might be sold out at this point, but we only do one turn, one round of it per year, and next year we're doing 16 spots, and it's you can find all the information about that at Lesley logan.co/elevate and also we have almost completed the full project here of these flash cards that we've been on a mission for for six years, the last that came out last year. Now we're working on, like, you know, like a.Lesley Logan 11:41  Collector's box that has like a cute little stand. I don't know, I've got some ideas. It might take us a little longer than we thought.Brad Crowell 11:47  Yeah, it's not as much of a priority, that's for sure. But you should go check out the cards themselves, because they're epic. Go to opc.me/flashcards, opc.me/flashcards.Lesley Logan 11:56  You know what, I wish maybe it's more of like somehow it's a stand where the you could put, you could put the card on the front or the back of this clear thing, and the back could be a magnifier.Brad Crowell 12:09  Oh, that's interesting.Lesley Logan 12:10  So, like, it, you could put the card in the front and of the slot, and it would just hold it up super cute, but if you put it on the behind, it would magnify it. For our perimenopausal ladies, I cannot get enough words on there and get the font to 10, so.Brad Crowell 12:24  That's why we linked back to the website on every card, because the website we can write as much as we want.Lesley Logan 12:29  And you can make it bigger.Brad Crowell 12:31  Yes, and you do that too. Cool. So, check this out. Go to opc.me/flashcards. Okay, so this week's charitable organization.Lesley Logan 12:38  Yes, yes, we made this change a couple weeks ago. Go back and listen if you want to know why we made the change. We don't have time for it today. June is Pride Month, you guys, and that means I wanted to, I thought it'd be interesting on our recaps to just talk about different LGBTQ IA charities that are doing great work for that community, because that community right now needs all the support it can get, because it is fighting the good fight and trying to help people. The whole community is just being hit with laws left, right, and center in the country. So, I want it, in the US, anyways, and so I wanted to highlight the Trevor Project. So, the Trevor Project was found in 1998 in West Hollywood, California, by James Lecesne.Brad Crowell 13:20  Lecesne, I think, Lecesne.Lesley Logan 13:21  Lecesne or you don't think it's Lecesne.Brad Crowell 13:24  Actually, I think it's Lecesne.Lesley Logan 13:25  Yeah, Lecesne.Brad Crowell 13:26  Yeah, James.Lesley Logan 13:31  Randy Stone, creators of the film Trevor. The Trevor Project is an American non-profit organization, is leading national organization providing crisis intervention, suicide prevention services to LGBTQ young people aged 13 to 24 That's a really, really tough at age, but you know it's really important that they have support. The organization offers a confidential telephone helpline, the Traverse Space Forum, and the educational programs, while reporting increase revenues and dedicating 80% of its budgets to programs. That's huge for a big charity, as them 80% to go like that. This is what we're looking at when we're looking at charities, you know. It has faced criticism regarding its promotion of gender ideology and allegations of mismanagement. So, okay, no, it's perfect, but I do, I do, I've heard of the project with different groups of different podcasts talking about how it can be helpful, and so, you know, I definitely hope it hope it helps people who are listening, who have friends whose kids or loved ones who need this help. Brad, why don't you tell what you liked about their website?Brad Crowell 14:28  Yeah, well, if you want to support them, go to their website, thetrevorproject.org thetrevorproject.org and I was looking at their website and learning a little more about them, and a pop-up happened, and it said, hey, if you need a quick exit from our website, you can just hit the escape key three times, and I was like, what, I'm really interested about this, so I tried it, you know, 123, bam, it closed the tab that I was on with The Trevor Project, and it opened Google, and so if you are looking for support from the Trevor Trevor Project, and you're concerned about someone barging in on you, you know, or you don't want to share that information with the people that you might live with or be around, what an amazing way for them to think ahead, and I mean it's pretty awesome.Lesley Logan 15:18  Speaking of The Pit, there was this one episode about human trafficking, and they were giving this girl a pen before they gave her the pen, because they thought the person that she was with was trafficking her. They opened up the pen to show her that on the in the ink part is the phone number, so the pen just looks like this like stupid pharmaceutical pen, but when you open it up, it actually had a helpline. And so I just think that, like, I love that groups are getting really creative with how can they actually help people, because just putting, you know, a flyer in a place, like, here you go, it's like no one can take that.Brad Crowell 15:51  Well, it's like it's like in, in the when we fly around the world, and we're in the airports, there's not just signs everywhere there, but they are there. Are hidden posters on the inside of the bathroom stalls that are about trafficking, and it says, hey, and it's in like multiple languages, like, like half a dozen languages. It's like, if you are being trafficked, here's the helpline, how to get support right now.Lesley Logan 16:16  Yeah.Brad Crowell 16:17  And you can call a number if you have access to a phone, of course.Lesley Logan 16:19  Oh my gosh, there was a bar in Miami that's like all these bars, they have, if you order an angel drink, they call it the drink, it's called angel, like, oh, I'd like to order the angel shot, then that tells the waiter that you feel unsafe with the date that you're on, and they will help you know you get out of that situation, which is amazing, like, they like, I don't know how they're helping, like maybe they call you a ride or something like that, something like that. I don't quote quote me, but I know the word was like angel, I guess. If the men find out what the word is for, you know, I don't, that's probably not so. The street was probably only in the women's restrooms, but yeah.Brad Crowell 16:53  The angel shot, it's a coded phrase used to signal bar staff that you feel unsafe and need help, such as a bad date.Lesley Logan 16:59  So, going back to the Trevor Project, you know, there's different things you can do, like if you want to do things more local to you, we, whenever we order, whenever you come to a retreat at our house, if you're in eLevate, things like that, we actually order from Bronze Cafe, and proceeds from their restaurant go to support the mental health of LGBTQ community in Las Vegas, so it's June is Pride Month, so you're gonna find all these different things around where you are that are gonna help people in this community, obviously, try to do it all year long, because they need it, but I just think that, like, it's a real shame that this group of people is being marginalized and made the reason why people's lives are so difficult. The trans community specifically, they're 2% of the population, and the actual 2% that is ruining people's lives across the world are the billionaires, those are the welfare people, those are the people who, like, I shared a post was showing, like, Amazon pays like 1.87% in taxes or something like that, it's like something stupid, Alphabet actually pays 10% that shocked me, I was like, they're not getting the best deal, like, so, so, anyways, if we all got together and supported people who are different than us and actually took out the small amount of people who are getting rich off of us, there will be a much different place. And then this group of people would actually get to live with human rights like the rest of us get to have. So, anyways.Brad Crowell 18:15  I just wanted to quickly check that stat. In the US, roughly one out of 10 identifies as LGBTQ as of 2024.Lesley Logan 18:23  Right, but trans is 2%Brad Crowell 18:25  Trans, trans, yeah, okay.Lesley Logan 18:26  Yes, but yeah. What I understand, you know, I know we're smart supposed to spend a lot of time on this, but the internet really pisses me off when these men are like, I'm not gonna have a gay kid.Brad Crowell 18:35  Right, like it's there choice.Lesley Logan 18:36  I shared this thing with you, this guy got this person to like, like, like, he's like, "Oh no, you, you choose to be gay. It's like, "Oh, okay, we'll be gay right now. He's like, "Be gay right now. He's like, "Oh no. He's like, "He's like, he's like, 'Well, you said you could choose, you choose to be gay, so be gay right now.' So the guy's like, "Okay, I choose to be attracted to you right now. He's like, "Yeah, well, I'm not gay, I can never choose to be gay, but you, you didn't.Brad Crowell 18:59  He just chose to be gay. He's like I'm only gay for like 10 seconds.Lesley Logan 19:02  Yeah, well, you're gay, so actually you're bisexual. It was such, was so well articulate, was so great. At any rate, it just shows that a lot of people have idiocies.Brad Crowell 19:13  Ridiculous.Lesley Logan 19:13  Fears, all this different stuff. And I think, like, the reality is that we have to make sure that children today, especially this group of people have love, support, and community, know that they are there's nothing wrong with them.Brad Crowell 19:24  Yeah.Lesley Logan 19:25  You know.Brad Crowell 19:26  Yeah. So.Lesley Logan 19:26  I could never imagine, I was bullied in school for having a big nose, for having big lips, for being poor, for my clothes being not like, I could never imagine, because when you're bullied for that, it changes, they change people, they get to somebody else, it changes all the time. To be bullied for who you're attracted to or how you identify? Holy fuck, that is relentless. That'd be non-stop. Anyways. Okay, well, we'll be right back.Brad Crowell 19:56  Thanks for sticking with us here.Lesley Logan 20:00  thetrevorproject.org, that was the linkBrad Crowell 20:00  Go to thetrevorproject.com yeah, all right. Brad Crowell 20:03  So let's talk about Clare Solly. Clare is a New York City-based actress, singer, novelist, and creative multi-hyphenate. She has self-published three women's fiction novels, is on the board of two theater companies in New York City, and currently works a day job she genuinely enjoys. Clare is also pursuing a PhD in creative writing, adding another chapter to her already wide-ranging creative career. I did not know she was doing that.Lesley Logan 20:32  Oh, she is. We're gonna call her Dr. Clare.Brad Crowell 20:36  Dr. Sally. Lesley Logan 20:37  I remember when she said, "I think I'm gonna do this. Do you think I'm crazy?" And I was like, "You're gonna do it anyways." That's when you know you have a real friend. It doesn't matter, I know you're gonna do it anyways. It doesn't matter. All right.Brad Crowell 20:54  Yeah. So, like I said, the two of you just beat off of each other. So, what was one of the one of the things that you loved, that she said.Lesley Logan 21:02  Oh my god, we got through so much, I think. I feel like, by the way, it's exiting, and it's a very, I find out of all the podcasts we've done, it's not just a theory, like she gave actual tangible things throughout the whole pod.Brad Crowell 21:17  Yeah, it was great.Lesley Logan 21:18  And it made me realize that we do the "Be It" action items, because in case someone's a little ethereal or a little esoteric, I wanted you to have tangible things to do.Brad Crowell 21:25  That's very true. That's why.Lesley Logan 21:26  That's why it exists, because of the woo-woo people are just like, get to know yourself, love everyone, and I wanted, like, okay, well, what do I do today? But this whole episode is like that. So she was talking about employer-employee relationships, so that's really what this is. We know not everybody works for someone else, so, but this is a great episode to present to your friend who's probably struggling with their boss, and sometimes you end up in one, right? Like, I have a girlfriend who's been an entrepreneur for decades, and now she's an employee again. So, she said the employer-employee relation does not inherently require a lifelong debt, and I think a lot of people who listen to this podcast, maybe not young kids today, because they've just seen it happen like they don't, they've not even, well, what they're saying is that the jobs don't even exist when they get older, but for those elder millennials and Gen X, like, where our parents had the same job forever. So, like.Brad Crowell 22:11  My dad just retired from 43 years at the same company.Lesley Logan 22:14  And just, I know we, I think we had it on the pod already, but how many people have retired since that person took over the job?Brad Crowell 22:20  When my dad retired, he asked the exit interview HR lady, "Hey, how many people have you had this interview with?" And she said, "Since Covid, five."Lesley Logan 22:34  FiveBrad Crowell 22:35  YeahLesley Logan 22:35  Only five.Brad Crowell 22:35  Only five.Lesley Logan 22:36  Five in six years. So that's how many people are retiring, which means a lot of them are leaving. But it does not inherently require lifelong debt, and I think that's really important, because I think especially, the majority of our listeners are women, we tend to worry about.Brad Crowell 22:51  I think we need to qualify that. What does lifelong debt mean in this context?Lesley Logan 22:56  Okay. I'm going to just say your parents on their vacation were worried about when they should tell their bosses that they were retiring, and I was like, "You don't," because somebody had left, and I was like, "You don't owe them that information, you're on vacation right now, you shouldn't even know that that person left." I was literally arguing with them, I'm like, "Why would you even go, 'Oh, I'm gonna retire too, so look for two people'? No, not your responsibility. It's their responsibility to be thinking about if people leave," and so that's what I would say.Brad Crowell 23:25  Yeah, I mean, lifelong debt, I would say, is just your entire life orients around the company that you work for. And I know how I operate, and that would be to pour myself into this company, whatever company that I'm working for. Lesley Logan 23:41  I did that for every company I worked for, I just kept being promoted because I poured so hard. They're like this girl doing so much, we should give her this next job.Brad Crowell 23:47  Yeah, and so, the employer-employee relationship does not inherently require a lifelong debt, meaning that, of course, when you're working for someone, do everything that's part of your role, but you don't owe them your life, right?Lesley Logan 24:04  Yeah, right. We were in Paris for four days. Let me tell you right now, they enjoy their life, they go to work. And our friend of ours who lives there, she's like, "Oh, it would be rude to eat at your desk, you literally have to eat in the lunch cafeteria."Brad Crowell 24:20  She works from home, and she goes into the office to have lunch with the group.Lesley Logan 24:24  Yeah, that's not even on her team, they're just the people of that office that she's at, because it's like rude to not be part of it. And she's like, "Yeah, you have a full hour-long lunch, and no matter what you've got going on, you sit there and you enjoy it." People really have a life, and I think there is a way to give 100% at work and then have a life, and I think that's a balance we're missing if you're in the States. If you're outside of the States, we travel a lot, I see you, you're doing a great job, you are living your life. But so let's go back to one thing she said, so she explained you don't actually owe the company anything, like, telling them where you're going.Brad Crowell 25:06  She was talking about actually, in this case, quitting, and you know, if they asked you like, "Well, where are you going to go work next?" Like, you don't need to tell them that.Lesley Logan 25:13  You don't actually have to, it's not a thing. And so, in fact, somebody asked L on demand, our agency member, because they were making a plan to leave, and they're like, "Well, how do I, do I tell them what I'm doing?" And she wrote, "No, you can just say, 'Thank you so much. As of this date, I'm no longer available for this role. I am still available and excited to do this part of my job.'" Because you actually don't need to tell them that you're gonna go run your own thing, especially like it's not, we tend to feel like we have to give them an excuse or a reason. It can just be that you're done. Done is a reason. Yeah, so it's your business. Lesley Logan 25:50  She also said you can be fully transparent about your feelings, but leaving is—it's when you're—it's not required. You can be, but you don't have to be. It's not required. So, the best policy she said is to just walk in and say, "I'm so sorry, I found X, Y, or Z," or "I found another job," and then keep it short and sweet. And I would say the shorter and sweeter the better, and try to do it in a succinct way so they're not the enemy and you're off to greener pastures. You never know if you have to come back.Brad Crowell 26:22  You guys were talking even about the, "Oh, they're paying me more," or whatever. Like, "This other company offered me this role, and they're offering me more money." But you don't even need to say anything like that, because that would then open up the conversation with the current company of, like, "Oh, well, we could pay you more." What if you actually just wanted to leave, you know? So you don't need to be building in an excuse. You can just say, "Hey, you know, I have to move on." You can give an excuse, but you don't need to. Brad Crowell 26:53  I had a very difficult time leaving my job because my old boss liked to sue people, and so I needed to come up with a reason that was acceptable so that he didn't think that I was going to go try to compete with him. Because if that happened, he was going to sue, he sues everybody. So I told him that I was going to focus on my family, and I left that open-ended.Lesley Logan 27:18  You know what, my last—the job that I left, they were litigious-ish because if certain trainers took clients, because they had a non-compete, which is not enforceable, and the non-solicitation as well, which means you couldn't solicit. But I was so afraid that they would think I was soliciting that I also said, "I'm focusing, my husband, you know, I don't need to work this much anymore." I just wanted them, it wasn't their business, and I didn't want them to be looking for something, you know. And we're still friendly, I still talk to everybody, one of my bosses there, like, it's so great. So it doesn't have to be a big deal. I think the gist of that topic is like you can literally, in two sentences or less, exit given the information that they need to process the paycheck and get to your next thing.Brad Crowell 28:08  Yeah, and when I was listening through the whole thing, I liked the idea of being gracious with the exit—like graceful, meaning short, succinct, and clear. And that's what Claire was talking about when exiting not on your terms, basically meaning you're fired. She said if you really want to hand-grenade things, you can, but it's a small world. The industries we all work in are small. Everyone knows everyone. If you have a tumultuous exit, word will get around, right? She said while being fired is definitely an ego stab in your heart, it is crucial to remain polite because the professional world is very small, even if the human instinct is to internalize blame. And what we will do effectively, because it's the human instinct, is internalize the blame. "What did I do wrong?" You know, and we keep reviewing it over and over again in our own minds, picking on ourselves effectively. She said, "Hey, let's turn it around to a positive instead of sitting there picking yourself apart. Maybe you can go and take this new time and learn a new skill." Alternatively, you can evaluate your peers by asking yourself, like, "What are the skills that I have? What can I add to my resume that makes me more excitable as a hire for the future?" So, really shifting back to working to put yourself back out there.Lesley Logan 29:34  Yeah, I think, going back a couple episodes ago, you have to feel your feelings. It's important to grieve that it's a loss, like even if you leave on your own terms, it's still a closure of something, so definitely do that.Brad Crowell 29:48  I always think about people who are almost arrogant, and I think in a situation like this, how lucky are they that they can look at someone firing them and go, "Well, it's your fucking loss, because I'm awesome." You know what I mean? Imagine that perspective versus, "Oh my god, what did I do wrong? Why are you firing me? It's my fault, I fucked up somewhere, I'm not even sure what I did wrong." Those are the two extremes. Maybe we can land in the middle and do ourselves a kindness and not beat ourselves up over it. Because I had to fire someone, and was this person perfect at their job? No. Were they coachable and teachable, and did we actually enjoy having them on the team? Yes. And ultimately, it wasn't because they fucked up a spreadsheet or a document that I had to fire them; I had to fire them because our company couldn't sustain paying them at the time, this many years ago, right? And so it was a shame and not fun, right? So it had nothing to do with her, and I wrote a glowing review.Lesley Logan 30:56  Yeah, no, and for the most part, especially if you're a boss listening to this, most people know, if you do it right and you're coaching correctly, people know that their job is not safe. So, in California, I have to write you up at least three times, because the employers' HR, when you let go of someone, they want to be like, "Here are the instances, here's what the thing was that you were supposed to do."Brad Crowell 31:21  Meaning they should be seeing it coming. "I've got two write-ups already, I know."Lesley Logan 31:25  Like, "Yeah, I'm in the hot seat," you know. And so now, just because you have three doesn't mean you're getting fired—like maybe they happen over 10 years, you know? One of them you fix, whatever. But especially if they're happening in a row, they're coming for it, they're looking for things to come at you with. So you should be watching for that. Lesley Logan 31:42  But you should also like—if I'm consistently having to remind you how to do something, or I'm questioning, like, if there's these things that you're being coached on in your job, and it's like, "Wow, you've been here a year, and we're still working on this" if you're a boss, they should not be blindsided by it if it has to do with the way that they're doing their job, because they're not mind readers. You actually have to tell them if they're doing their job well or not, and if they're not doing their job well, you have to tell them how to do it well to give them that opportunity. And if you don't do that, then they're gonna be blindsided. But if you're constantly re-coaching them on their job and bringing up, like, hey, even if you don't write them up, "Hey, this is the third time we've had to go over this, what's going on here?" Hopefully they're aware. Lesley Logan 32:22  Now, some people are dense and they don't get it. I fired people who yelled at me and all these different things—not like "my loss," but like, "How dare you," right? And I remember going, "You didn't see this coming, dude? This is our third write-up. You're not on time for your clients. What do you want me to do? You're not on time, you've not been on time multiple times."Brad Crowell 32:44  Yeah.Lesley Logan 32:45  This is on you. Brad Crowell 32:46  Yeah, exactly.Lesley Logan 32:47  If he had been taking the bus, I would have been like, "Okay, we got to find a new bus route, we got to find a new shift." Nope, this is all on him driving, you know. So, I think for the most, it doesn't always happen that way, but that's always my ideal goal, is like people know.Brad Crowell 33:01  I had someone try to write me up one time, and I told them that I would not sign the paperworkLesley Logan 33:05  You, you also don't have to sign.Brad Crowell 33:07  And I said, "I disagree with you 100%. I'm happy to talk to your boss about all of this, because I will not sign this."Lesley Logan 33:13  You don't have to sign, they still, you still got it, but you don't have to sign if you don't agree with it. That's true. Yeah, that's fine. It's all combo. Anyways, this is like, thank fucking God I'm not in an office. Jesus. Okay, hold on. She said more great things about exiting.Brad Crowell 33:29  Yes. Well, stick, stick around really quick. We'll be, we will be right back. Brad Crowell 33:34  All right, welcome back. So, let's talk about those "Be It" action items. If you're new here and you're like, "What the hell is that?" "Be It" is the Be It Till You See It podcast acronym, what bold, executable, intrinsic, or targeted action items can we take away from your convo? Claire said, "Hey, give yourself space." Okay, she explicitly warns against immediately jumping back into work after making an exit, whether you made it or they made it. She stated, "Make sure you give yourself a week or two off between jobs, because in any capacity, you have to decompress. It's just good for your mental state." She cautions against skipping this decompression phase, because when you immediately jump back into the next thing, you might actually already be angry or sad or frustrated, or whatever. She said she has rage-updated her resume before, and it just never works out very well.Lesley Logan 34:29  Sounds like if you get dumped, and then you go and do your Tinder or Hinge profile, it probably isn't gonna be as great as if you just waited a moment to be like, "Wow, that person wasn't so great for me. Let me.Brad Crowell 34:42  Yeah, don't rage-update your resume, it's hilarious. What about you? What was your big takeaway?Lesley Logan 34:45  II mean, personally, I never want to have to update a resume like that. I never want to do.Brad Crowell 34:50  I know we've had to update a resume to submit for some things for the business, and we're like, "Where is our resume? What did we.Lesley Logan 34:59  Now, Lex's job is like every so many months, go—because eventually, how long is the resume, you know? How many pages? Because I'm not vying for a job, but loans and stuff want things like that. Anyways, she said take a look at yourself and where you are, look at where you can improve and create an exit strategy. So I like this, because you might not like the job that you're at, you might be frustrated with where it's at, but this kind of is like taking a little bit of radical responsibility—like, where can I improve so that when I find the next place, I'm already a better person for it at the next job, you know? And that allows you to create an exit strategy as well. And I think this is kind of like, you know, if in anything you're wanting to leave, there's a reason you want to leave, and some of it's the situation, and some of it is ownership of how you could be a better person given the new situation, right? She compares this action to having an emergency strategy for a house fire, so you already know where your exits are, and I like that, right?Brad Crowell 36:01  She has some great tips, you know, especially if you know you're leaving and you had already taken things home, slowly start to bring them back to the office, not all at once, and vice versa. If you have things at the office, you could slowly start to take them home again, not all at once, because you're not trying to make your office look empty, but just practical stuff. Pretty cool.Lesley Logan 36:21  Because you never—I mean, even if you think you know your employers the most, like when I worked in, when I ran retail shops, if you gave us a two-week notice, our goal was to see how quickly we can get you a paycheck and end your shift before two weeks in your job, because it was an at-will state, so we could do that. So you put the two weeks in because then you get the better review, like, "Oh, they left and they gave notice," and all these different things, but especially in Pilates and in retail, you have clients, you have customers, so the longer you're there, the longer you can take client phone numbers, emails, different things. Like, we're protecting stuff, so we would just be like, "Out. Bye."Brad Crowell 37:02  Yeah, I think notoriously Netflix is like crazy. If you go in and you quit, before you get back to your desk, you're locked out of every, yeah.Lesley Logan 37:12  Yeah, no, I think it's even in their handbook of like what happens. Keith Olbermann is the one who—it's so funny because he's like, "I was on—they let me be on the air for three months, I could say whatever I wanted." But I do—you never—you just don't know how people are going to react to exits, so make sure that you have prepared well for the exit that you are in control of so that if they do decide, especially if you're an hourly employee or something like that, that they're changing it, you're not needing that money as the in-between, you know. Anyways, well, love it. I'm Lesley Logan.Brad Crowell 37:53  And I'm Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 37:54  Thanks, Clare, for being our Be It Babe, ready to jump in. She'll be back because we'll have her at an interview.Brad Crowell 38:00  The Boomerang Buddy.Lesley Logan 38:01  Oh, I'm interviewing the person in two days, I better finish that book. I'm interviewing a really great doctor, and she's like, "I want to be in the Be It Book Club, and I want to be the recap person." So, Brad, you're unfortunately,unless you want to, you can join us for the recap if you want.Brad Crowell 38:19  It's fun. I love it.Lesley Logan 38:20  Yeah, all right, guy, go Be It Till You See It.Brad Crowell 38:23  Bye for now.Lesley Logan 38:24  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 39:07  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 39:12  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 39:16  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 39:23  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 39:26  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

School teaches you how to land a job, but no one teaches you how to leave one. In this episode, Lesley Logan reunites with longtime friend, novelist, and PhD candidate Clare Solly to talk through what most career advice skips: how to actually walk out the door. They cover how to know when it's time to go, how to figure out if you can afford to leave, how to rehearse the resignation conversation, and what to do when you're the one being let go. Whether you're eyeing the exit or recovering from a layoff, this conversation gives you the words and the plan to move forward without losing yourself. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:What jealousy of your friends' jobs reveals about you.How to know if you can afford to leave your job.What to expect when you tell them you're quitting.Why staying graceful matters even when you're fired.The exit plan you can write before you ever need it.Episode References/Links:Clare Solly's Website – https://www.claresolly.comClare Solly on Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/actinglikeclareClare Solly's Novels on Amazon – https://beitpod.com/novelsbyclareClare Solly's Novels on B&N – https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/clare%20sollySubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsGuest Bio:Clare Solly is a modern day Renaissance woman living in New York City. She is an actress, writer, national pageant queen, and by day she is an executive assistant. She has published three books: The Time Turner, Christmas and Cleats and Save The Last Piece. Clare runs two theatre companies in NYC: The Bechdel Group and Company of Fools Theatre where she loves to foster and challenge new writers. She also is an avid bookstagrammer who grew her followers to almost 11K in 5 months time.If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Clare Solly 0:00  So we learn how to do a job in school, and then we learn how to sort of kind of interview for a job, but nobody ever tells you how to leave a job, like how to quit, how to prepare for leaving a job, yeah, how to like deal with being in between jobs, like no one trained you for that.Lesley Logan 0:18  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained 1000s of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity, and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring bold, executable, intrinsic, and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it till you see it. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:01  All right, Be It babe, get ready to totally listen to two friends talking about a topic that we had a lot of fun talking about without you. We're like, we should turn on a recording device and some microphones and lighting and share this with you, because I keep getting great guests who talk about leaving the thing you don't love and doing the thing you love, and it's like, okay, but how? And some people have given some nice things, but I've always just felt like, as a person who's very action-oriented, who's very much like, "Tell me the first next step, because if I can get the first next step, then I can get the second next step." I wanted to have an episode for you like that. And so we have Clare Solly back on the pod. You've heard her on recaps, if you have been listening to this pod for a long time, you've even heard her on episodes if you've really been with us since starting episode 19, and now you can hear us talk about exit strategies and how to exit things. So here is Clare Solly. Lesley Logan 1:47  Hey, Be It babe. Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast. I am so excited because I have Clare Solly back, and we just wrapped two recap episodes. You've been on the pod, we've had two interviews with you on the pod, correct?Clare Solly 2:00  I think two interviews, and I've done several recaps.Lesley Logan 2:03  Month of recaps for me.Clare Solly 2:06  Yeah.Lesley Logan 2:07  It was so fun. I was like, what are people gonna say? You know what? They loved it, the listeners stayed the same.Clare Solly 2:11  You know what? I will sit and chat with you forever and ever and ever, because we've been friends for a million years. But it was also really fun to do Brad recaps.Lesley Logan 2:19  Oh, just to talk about Brad. I listened to him because I was like, I wonder what they're talking about. But you know what's really nice? I often think about, like, what if I need someone to stand in for me, you know, like with OPC we have enough recordings that we could just replay them and people would be like, send us our favorite ones and we'll just replay those. But for the pod, if it's not me, Brad could do some interviews, but you can always step in, which is great. It's so wonderful.Clare Solly 2:45  Redheads, so it works.Lesley Logan 2:46  It really does. It really does. We're both, we're both redheads. So Claire's here, and we were like chit chatting, while you know, she was on the shake plate, I was on the red light. We're talking about, like, I've had a lot of guests on the podcast talk about, like, exiting, like it's okay to leave things, and I have found that the answers to a lot of my guests, when I'm like, okay, but how do you leave, have been kind of not helpful, yeah, like, I love my guests, and I, and I get it, like, especially if you just ended something, you might not be able to describe how you did that, and also sometimes the ends of things are embarrassing, like, yeah, you know, like, whether you wanted to end them or they were ended for you, or I will say, like, some of the.. we're talking more about exiting jobs, but I will say, like, exiting relationship, I sucked at the only time I have ever broken up with someone? I did the worst job doing it, absolute worst, the absolute worst job, like just terrible job, terrible job at it. And it's because, like, I never broken up with anybody. I kind of also didn't date enough to, yeah, to get broken up, and I feel like one of my breakups was more of a ghost team.Clare Solly 4:00  Yeah, I kind of had that too. I kind of had that,Lesley Logan 4:02  So like, to like sit down and like tell someone, and like I guess you'll never have a good answer for why you're ending something, really. So like I just didn't have a good answer, and I just kept going, okay, so I'm gonna go.Clare Solly 4:14  Yeah.Lesley Logan 4:16  So anyways, I so I think like I think exiting things is a muscle. I think like learning how to exit things, itClare Solly 4:21  absolutely is. We learn how to do a job in school, and then we learn how to sort of kind of interview for a job, but nobody ever tells you how to leave a job, like how to quit, how to prepare for leaving a job. Yeah, how to like deal with being in between jobs, like no one trained you for that.Lesley Logan 4:39  Well, and there's like some sort of, sometimes there's shame, there's embarrassment, there's all these things. First, before we get into this, I did a terrible job.Clare Solly 4:46  You heard it first on this episode, everybody.Lesley Logan 4:48  You know what, guys, I'm also.. I'll just be really honest with my B. A pod listeners, so I've been.. I've been diagnosed with the ADHD that you all knew I had before I had it. So today is the first day on medication, and I am just. Seeing how I'm doing, and so clearly it's doing something. It's not helping me, it's not helping me be more organized. She looks great. I'm supposed to say, Claire Solly, will you tell everyone who you are and what do you rock at?Clare Solly 5:14  My name is Clare Solly. I rock at pretty much anything I try, and if I don't, I rock at trying to figure out how not to be too terribly disappointed. I am a quadruple six tuple hyphenate. I am an actress, singer in New York City, have a day job that I really find a lot of crazy fun in. I'm also a novelist, for those of you that have listened to podcasts with me on it before. New news in my life: I've actually gone back to school, and I'm working on getting a PhD in creative writing. Lesley Logan 5:46  I can't wait to call you Dr. Clare Solly.Clare Solly 5:48  Oh my god, can I tell you, I read this meme the other day, that once I have my doctorate, I'm so excited to order something and have it come in and be like, look, this is what the doctor ordered. It's such a dad joke that I will totally use in my life. I have three self-published novels, you can find them on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. They're women's fiction. I run with theater companies in New York City and do all kinds of things, so I'm all over the place and making magic happen.Lesley Logan 6:22  So we met at a job.Clare Solly 6:24  We met at a job. I actually hired you at a job, pretty much.Lesley Logan 6:27  I remember thinking you were standing on an elevated step when I brought my application in, but no, you're just a giant.Clare Solly 6:34  Yeah, because I was behind a counter and I came around. I remember you looking me up and down and going, oh, that's you.Lesley Logan 6:42  I thought she was on an elevated platform, but she was just wearing heels.Clare Solly 6:48  Yep.Lesley Logan 6:49  And so we got to work together, we opened a business together, we had a shoe company together for two years. Fun fact about me, I used to design shoes. I should keep that as part of my two truths and a lie. Clare Solly 7:09  Shoe designer right here. And we spent long nights and long days sitting together and laughing our asses off and drinking.Lesley Logan 7:17  Oh my god, yeah, that was crazy. And probably because we're high on glue, we used deck varnish to make these shoes you guys have no idea.Clare Solly 7:27  By the way, if anybody out there has a pair of Snip and Tuck shoes. Lesley Logan 7:31  Snip and Tuck's Opinionated Shoes. Clare Solly 7:33  Oh that's right. Snip and Tuck's Opinionated Shoes. If somebody has a pair of those still in existence, please write into the pod. I need pictures of them.Lesley Logan 7:43  I'm gonna pull them. I think I kept a shoe from each of the ones that I had. Yeah because I'm not wearing them so I was like I'm not going to keep both. I'll find it in the closet for you. My sister still has a pair.Clare Solly 7:54  Oh my gosh, I didn't keep mine because I've moved too many times.Lesley Logan 8:01  Same. That's why I think I have a shoe from each pair. But anyways, we were talking about this because I interviewed a woman and she talked about the pros and cons, like how much it costs you to stay in the thing you're in. So Clare, how many jobs, you've counted your jobs, I haven't counted mine, so how many jobs have you had? Clare Solly 8:18  Well, actually counting Snip and Tuck, if we count self-employment, I've had 34, I've worked for 34 different companies or people, because I've worked for private families. Lesley Logan 8:29  Oh my god, I worked at a coffee shop, I worked at a doctor's office, then I worked where we worked together, and then I worked for a high-end fitness company. Clare Solly 8:38  Did you work for that? Remember we had that friend that we worked with, that and had a separate job, and did you ever go work for her at all? No? Okay.Lesley Logan 8:45  Then I worked for myself, and it was Snip and Tuck's. And that's all I've had. Clare Solly 8:55  Have you worked, you've worked for two gyms or just one?Lesley Logan 8:57  Just the just the one gym, just by, but here's the thing, in the job we worked together, I did every job, every job, and then.Clare Solly 9:06  We can count that as 20, if you want.Lesley Logan 9:07  Yeah, yeah, so that, well, that's like four, four, five classes.Clare Solly 9:10  Becaus you had five different positions in that.Lesley Logan 9:12  Yeah, cashier, sales, key holder, assistant manager, manager, and then I was hoping to be like an area manager, but then you know, life, and then at the fitness company I was an instructor and a manager and a teacher trainer, and then a regional manager, and as a group fitness instructor. So we're at like 20 jobs, yeah, yeah, we'll go there. So anyways, I feel more like an elder millennial now that I'm at 20, but like some of them I can most I can say, like I left the coffee shop job in a fine way, I left the doctor's office job at a fine way, but I'm not sure. Clare Solly 9:42  The coffee shop, they wouldn't let you go home for breaks in college, and they were always asking you to pick up shifts. You were beloved at that coffee shop.Lesley Logan 9:52  Yeah, I know. And I actually, when my in-laws got us an espresso machine, Brad was reading the directions like, I know what I'm doing.Clare Solly 10:00  Yesterday, when you were like, 'Do you know how to work a coffee machine? I was like, 'Nope, but you do.'Lesley Logan 10:04  I know. So, but I can say, like, you know, those jobs ended because I moved, and so it was like, "Of course, they know I was." Yeah, the other jobs were... I felt like I owed them more when I was leaving, versus, like, "Oh, this is just a job." You know what I mean? But I feel like, because I give my all, I kind of felt like I owe... maybe I should give them a month's notice, maybe I should give two months' notice. So let's talk about, you know, what should you be thinking about if you're exiting on your own terms?Clare Solly 10:36  I think you need to think about the value of yourself, what it is, like, what your skills are, right? This is also kind of helping you gear your mind towards rebuilding your resume and refocusing, like, what you want to do. Also, this is sort of tangential, but just stick with me for a second. When you find yourself jealous of your friends, especially with things that they do in their job, or specifically how their life revolves around their job, look at what that jealousy actually is, right? So you run your own business. I have another friend who runs her own business. I'm not afraid to say this, I'm jealous of both of you. And why is that? Because I like the freedom, the freedom, air quotes, I like the perceived freedom that I think that you have. I like the ability. Lesley Logan 11:21  I laugh because we're sitting here recording this podcast because I have a schedule and I have deadlines, and we can do this today, but it's a perceived freedom. Yes, you choose your boss. Clare Solly 11:30  Well, and that you get to travel, which that one is true, that you get to travel and you get paid for it for the most part. What else? I like... well, we'll just stick with those. Those three things are enough. Okay, so then I need to take that back and say, oh, that jealousy... oh, I actually would like a job where I travel, where I have a perceived freedom, a.k.a. I don't need to be lashed to a desk from eight to five, Monday through Friday. I want to do some things where maybe I'm out in the world doing things, and I work at a desk a couple of days a week, right? So look at yourself and not only what you value, but what skills do you have, do I have—we'll just use me—that can get me to where I want to be, right? So I can't magically leave my desk job and then go travel the world and make money, but I have to go figure out things like you did back when you were at the company we both worked at.Lesley Logan 12:24  Yeah.Clare Solly 12:24  And you went and you were taking classes, and then those classes turned into trainings, and then you went and educated yourself while you were making the money to do so. I mean, listen, if you want to be a babe and you want to like just quit your job tomorrow and run off into the sunset and go make magic happen, as whatever you want to do, live your best life.Lesley Logan 12:47  I do think that, depending on where you are in your life, there's different opportunities to blow things up versus not.Clare Solly 12:53  Oh, yeah, and in my 40s, I give very few (inaudible).Lesley Logan 12:56  Yeah, yeah. And I will say, like, I kind of blew up my life as far as personal life goes. I've never, I'm not someone who's ever blown up my life when it comes to the money I make, because I wasn't raised with a lot, and so for me, I want to be, when it comes to exiting things, I've always made sure I had a runway. So when I was,I actually, the job that we had together, I actually thought I would just be there like two days a week, because I thought I could do that. I thought, I'll do the two days a week, and that means I can keep my customers and keep my clients, my commission, my extra money. And then I'll have this business. And what happened is they were going to fire another salesperson so I could be the two-day-a-week, they were going to fire the other two-day-a-weeker, and I was like, oh, and it made me go, but she really needs this job. I need this job too, but also I have enough clients, and the company that I was teaching at part-time on top of my private Pilates business was going to, I knew they were going to offer me a management job, so if push came to shove, I knew I could just accept that job and reclaim that money in some way. So I actually decided to fully quit there versus do a little slowly stop working for them, because I just didn't want someone to lose their job, especially in early 2010. That just felt like that's a hard thing for her to go and replace. But when I left the fitness company, what I did is I figured out how much, I love your description of, like, what are you jealous of? It's also like, what are you finding you're resenting, like when people email and you're just like, you have instant irritation. And so for me, I felt even though they didn't think, and my friends who still work for them, they don't feel like it's a beck and call. It felt like to me it was a beck and call, clearly my ADHD signs, but really a beck and call to me. And so what I decided was, I sat down, it's like, okay, if I want to give up this job, how many Pilates clients would I need to have to replace this salary? And that salary included health benefits, that included my 401k, all these different things that I really think about. But then when you do the math, it really helped me go, okay, so I need to get this many clients coming twice a week. But what's the reality with how many hours I have to do that with? And so I had to go, okay, at the point that I get five clients who come two times a week, I can quit the salaried part of the job, and so I was able to go. I'm no longer going to manage, but I still taught there, was still a teacher trainer. And then it took me one year from that to let go of all of it. So I will say, like, if you do have the control, give if you need a runway, because money is a thing that you don't have extras of, an abundance of, to go remake yourself. It's really figuring out, like, the skills you'll need to have, the money you need to have, and knowing the numbers. I think that really puts you in a power position. I actually felt really confident letting go of that.Clare Solly 15:52  Yeah, and to, you know, add kind of to the money conversation, make sure you have a little bit more runway than you actually think that you'll need. Staying in a job that you hate for one more month is not going to be terrible compared to the two months you might be out of work and are panicking because you're like, where's the money going to come from?Lesley Logan 16:11  Yeah, I couldn't agree more. We had somebody who wanted to start her own business, and she... but her current job was just really, really stressful, really exhausting, and so Brad and I were like, "Hey, let's be honest, how much are you making here? Okay." So I looked up, I'm like, "If you worked at Starbucks 20 hours a week, you can make 80% of what you're making at this job." Yeah, so could you live off 80% of what you're making, right? Could you... I don't know your numbers, I don't know what that is. Maybe you need to, for the next three months, you just actually try to live off 80% and you bank up some money, right? And then you go find a job where you clock in and out, right? You just clock in and out—like no one who works at Starbucks is thinking about mochas when they leave, like they're not, right? Like, maybe a manager is, but I'm not saying that, I'm saying, like a barista, like just going in. So find a job that is actually not stressful, or where you get to leave the job when you're there, and then you can build your thing. If you can't do what I was able to do, which is like slowly leave away, is there a way that you can live off a little less money and do a different job that you could just leave it there? But I.Clare Solly 17:21  Now that's really smart.Lesley Logan 17:22  I think that it's always better if you can do it on your own timing. But yes, I agree, you need a little bit more money than you think, and you might want to start thinking, like, how can I make myself live on less money so I can be banking it, so I could have that runway, that two months' savings you have for rent and things like that.Clare Solly 17:38  Yeah, I like the strategy of having like a standby job. Let's talk about quitting.Lesley Logan 17:44  Yes.Clare Solly 17:44  That's like, how do you quit, right?Lesley Logan 17:46  Because, okay, wait, we made the plans, but now we have to tell them we're quitting. Clare Solly 17:52  Which is is terrifying, terrifying.Lesley Logan 17:54  Thank you for saying that. I thought I was the only person who's just like, oh my god, I know something that they don't know.Clare Solly 17:58  No, the best thing you can do is like almost get together with a friend and rehearse.Lesley Logan 18:04  Okay. Okay.Clare Solly 18:05  So we've made our plan like whatever it is, you know, you make sure that you've got enough money, that you've got sort of a runway, you make sure that if you have the friends or the family that are able to support you emotionally, mentally, whatever, you might just make sure that's part of your setup of moving forward. And then I, it's funny, I want to go in and quit always. I do these steps, I have found, because I've also done the thing where I'm like, "I'm moving," and pretended that I had a fake reason to leave a job. I've done that, and that doesn't feel good. The best thing to do is to go in, figure out kind of a script for yourself, and also be prepared to have them have different reactions. Like, they could ask you to stay and give you more money, so if you obviously hate the job, but money was your reason for leaving, maybe you might want to consider that, so be prepared for that as a conversation. Be prepared for them to just not care whatsoever. And then people also don't like any kind of leaving separation, whatever; they kind of can lash out at you, which is why it feels terrifying, because you're like, oh my god, they're going to hate me forever. You're leaving the job; they might hate you for a month or two, but they won't care.Lesley Logan 19:25  Also like, if they're going to hate you forever, do you really want to work there?Clare Solly 19:29  Exactly.Lesley Logan 19:30  I mean, that is terrifying. Like, I don't want anyone to feel unsafe, but I really think, like, really ask yourself, if someone's going to hate you forever, do you really want to work for someone just because they'll like you? I do like the idea of playing... like Brad did that with me. I was leaving when I was leaving the fitness job, because I was in management and all these things. He was like, "Well, what if they ask you that they're going to pay you more?" And I had to really think about that, but I also knew I'll just take every promotion someone gives me. So, to be honest, I was literally quitting so they wouldn't offer me another promotion.Clare Solly 20:00  Yeah, I mean, and that's hard, because it's like ultimately you're like, oh, well, things seem to be getting better, so maybe this is... which is why you should be prepared for it, because if you really don't like the actual job you're in, or the company that you're in, there's nothing wrong with that. You have just outgrown that space.Lesley Logan 20:19  Well, that's the thing, like leaving a job is like leaving any relationship, and I think, especially as women, we're not taught that. Like, you can leave friends behind. I think fondly of the friendships I had in elementary, high school, college, you know, even the friendships I had at different jobs, but I don't think that the version of me today could be friends with the version of them... you know, maybe we could be friends today, but we outgrew each other at some point. And maybe we could have reconnected, and I'm not saying that we never will, we might, we might run into each other, but I do think that people think we have to keep all of these people all the time, and so you've outgrown the position. Now, if you are someone who's like, oh my gosh, they're going to give me more money for staying, and you're like, "I could handle this for six more months," and you don't have another thing, then there's nothing wrong with staying and banking up more money, like that's fine too. But I do think that rehearsing that, so you know... and so Brad was like, "If they offer you more money, what are you doing?" I said, "I still need to go. I can't keep going the way this is going, and I already have a good thing lined up, and I'm going to bet on myself." Also, I kind of figured they would just hire me back if I needed to.Clare Solly 21:25  Some jobs can, some jobs can, but yeah, definitely. Like, you should wrap your mindset, and I'm not saying... I'm a chronic overthinker, so I'm not promoting overthinking quitting, but at the same time, make sure you are ready for the different options to be thrown at you.Lesley Logan 21:42  So maybe they might be like, "Okay, great, bye," and you might be like, oh. And the other thing is, depending on the state you live in, you might not get to finish the time.Clare Solly 21:50  Yeah.Lesley Logan 21:50  That you have. so I just want to say, be strategic about that, because I worked for a company where if someone put their notice in, the soonest.Clare Solly 22:00  You get walked out the door.Lesley Logan 22:01  Yes, as soon as we could legally give you the paycheck that we could owe you, we would let you go, yeah. And that's not because we didn't like you; it's actually because the transition process was a lot better, and the liability, all these different things. Like, I remember when we worked at the store, if someone gave us their two weeksClare Solly 22:16  Yeah. Lesley Logan 22:16  For the most part.Clare Solly 22:17  It's awkward too.Lesley Logan 22:18  For the most part, they were pretty much like, okay, we can have a paycheck to them by tomorrow. What's the schedule? Okay. And we literally, they would come in for that day, and I'd go, "Thank you so much for the day you just had. Here's your final pay, it includes today, you know?" They would FedEx it to the store so I could give it to them, and IClare Solly 22:36  Forgot about that, actually.Lesley Logan 22:37  Yeah, and we would live short-handed, because, honestly, it wasn't even personal to them. Putting the business owner hat on, they could steal, there's different things they could do, they could try to spend the next two weeks seeing their customers' information. So there's all these different things about protecting, and that back then, like, we remember, we had the customers' phone numbers and credit cards book, yeah. So there's a lot of information to protect at the fitness place. We wanted to transition the clients as quickly as possible, so we would do that. So I would just say, be mindful of where you're at, because it might be that it might end sooner than you were ready. Yeah, when I tried to exit a rental situation, the contract meant that I didn't have to give them any notice, but they also could just kick me out at any time. We were friends, so I thought they would honor that we're friends, and I wanted... I could see that they were turning away other renters, and I was their number one renter. So I was like, "Hey, these are my friends, I want to let them know, you guys, in four months I'm going to open up my own space, just so I can film whenever I want to. It's not personal." They seemed really, really fine about it, and then three months later they weren't fine.Clare Solly 23:42  Yeah.Lesley Logan 23:43  I don't know what changed. I know what changed now, but at the time I didn't know it changed, and so they literally kicked me out. And I had a month before my equipment was going to show up, and I had the studio, I didn't have a trash can. I had to text all my clients like, "Come to this space, we're moving in early." And then I called all my Pilates friends, and I borrowed equipment from them, and I made it work for a month. So I was, I mean, I'm pretty good to move on my resource, I'm so resourceful, Aquarian with ADHD, like, when the shoe drops, I am so much better than when everything is good. But you just don't know, so you just need to take... I would write down, what would I do if this happened? What would I do? What's the worst-case scenario? And also, here's the thing, the worst-case scenario rarely happens, but even if it did, have a backup plan for that. I think it's helpful.Clare Solly 24:30  Yeah, and like, I'm also kind of, if you have a personal space at the place that you work and you keep personal things there, you might slowly start to take them home, you know, not everything all at once, so it doesn't, you know.Lesley Logan 24:43  Yeah.Clare Solly 24:44  Flags to anybody.Lesley Logan 24:45  I haven't had an office job, so thanks, Claire.Clare Solly 24:47  I'm absolutely not saying do not take anything against company policy, don't do that. And in fact, make sure that anything you might have... because I mean, I work from home like two days a week now in my current job, but you might start bringing back things that might be company property, and just start leaving them at your desk instead. So just start the severing a little bit early if you know it's going to happen.Lesley Logan 25:15  I think so. I think so. Okay, so we talked about if it's on your own terms, we talked about like planning, and we talked about leaving. I guess we didn't really say, like, how do you say I'm quitting? What do you say?Clare Solly 25:28  It's different every time.Lesley Logan 25:31  Do you give a story ahead, or do you just start with I'm quitting?Clare Solly 25:34  Honestly, I think the best is short and sweet. Like, they don't... you don't owe them anything, they don't really owe you anything. I mean, yes, you've invested your time and your intellectual powers to them for however long, but you don't owe them anything. And I really think, too, like telling them where you're going, unless they're asking you, that's your business, you don't have to tell them. Even if they ask you directly, straight out, where you're going, you kind of don't have to tell them.Lesley Logan 26:02  Depending on who it is, I might not. I might say, like, I'm just, I will say, like, when I was leaving the fitness jobs, the management job, I said, "You know what, after we get married, the management responsibilities are not going to be something I'm capable of doing in the best way." And I used my marriage, but it was just like telling them I'm going to go teach somewhere could have meant that they would have fired me from all of my teaching gigs.Clare Solly 26:30  Yeah.Lesley Logan 26:30  You know, so, and by the way, I was legally allowed. I lived in the state of California, there's no non-competes, like I could do whatever I wanted, but you just... I didn't trust the person I worked with to not be vindictive, so I just was like, I'm just going to use my marriage.Clare Solly 26:42  You have to do what's best for you. But honestly, the best policy is just saying, you know, walk in, "I'm so sorry, I found XYZ. I found another job, I'm getting married, I'm moving," whatever it is. Keep it short. "I would like to put in my two weeks for you, if you'll accept that." You can say something bullshitty like, "I've enjoyed working here," or something that is sort of true, "I've learned a lot working here." You don't have to tell them why you're leaving, like, "Hey, you're a bullshit boss." Like, you don't have to tell people that. No, if you want to burn the bridge, you take those matches, baby, and you burn, but it's best to get in, get out, I think.Clare Solly 27:20  I think so, and also, as much as you want to tell if somebody is worth... like, "Oh my god, this person's the most abusive person," unless they want the criticism, they're not going to listen to you. Yeah, you know, so I just think that some lessons they have to learn on their own. But I also just think that I was raised by people and grandparents who worked for their companies forever, all the decades, retired, started the job and retired with the job. And so I was raised with these people like, you do the best, you do better than they're asking, right? And the reality is that in today's world, that is actually very different. They just stop paying you for what they were paying you, and you're just doing more, and not all bosses are aware that you're actually giving above and beyond. You have a family member who just retired, and they had to hire three people to replace him, but were they paying him three people's jobs worth? No, they were just working him to the ground. And so I think we do need to say... like, I'm not saying that all companies are evil, but a company will replace you. The thing that I learned early on when I ran that jewelry store is everybody's replaceable, even your best salesperson. And that's terrible, and that's awful, and I will remember all the personalities, but the truth is that a lot of us are being replaced by AI.Clare Solly 28:42  Or not even that we're being replaced by, people you and I are of the age where companies are reskilling and they're replacing people with newer skills, whether fresh out of college or fresh out of a program, right, rather than somebody who's been there with a longer tenure. Lesley Logan 29:00  Yeah.Clare Solly 29:00  And it's not necessarily the age thing; it's like what you know and what you're able to do. Lesley Logan 29:04  Well, and also, even for those who are going to start your own thing, when you become a business owner, you start to realize, like, "What can I pay for this role?" So you might... we have lost some people on the team. We're actually, I'm really proud of us, we're really good at weeding people out in the interview process. We keep our team members for a long time, but we've been around for a long time. Like, this business I've been running, I've been running it by myself starting in 2016 full-time, right? Yeah. And then my first hires were in 2016. Brad came on full-time, and we started hiring more. We had about six people in 2020, now we're more like over 20, but we lost three people due to life situations at the same time. One went on maternity leave forever, one was moving and needed to be paid more for the same job. And it's like, but the role is this pay, like, that's the budget, and that's the role.Clare Solly 29:54  You can tell them that too. You can say, "Hey, I got this job in another company and it pays more." Yeah, I'm welcome, you know.Lesley Logan 30:00  And we will take all of them back in a heartbeat, but also as a business owner, sometimes I can love someone so much, and I have to let them grow somewhere else because where my budget is for that role that they're doing isn't what they are wanting or feel they deserve, right? And that's not personal, and that's the hard thing.Clare Solly 30:22  Yeah, yeah. And also, like, if you're leaving a job because you got more money, you don't have to open that door for them. You just say, "I'm getting more money." Again, just the facts, minimal details, and just the facts.Lesley Logan 30:37  I'm having a life change, those are changes in my life, whatever, my life needs, whatever, you don't owe them more information than they actually need. You just, you really, really don't.Clare Solly 30:47  It's literally like, "Hey Lesley, I loved working on the Be It Pod. I'm so sorry, I've got a job that is willing to pay me more to do podcasts, and I'm excited about it." Lesley Logan 30:57  Yeah. And it would suck so much. And, you know, we can talk another time of how our team always prepares for anybody to be sick for any amount of time because we have to keep going. Like, you know, and I want to honor people's mental health days and things like that, so we have like a lot of redundancy so we can make sure that we can be there for people, but also so people can go and someone can take their place. And it would suck, and I think of them so fondly, and all that stuff.Lesley Logan 31:21  Okay, what if your exit is not your own, like you're fired or the company closed? Like, what happens if the exit happened to you? Clare Solly 31:30  Oh, definitely, definitely. Lesley Logan 31:31  Everything happens for you, but let's be real, like, it happened to you. Clare Solly 31:35  Definitely throw as many things as you can, break as many things on your way out, you know, stab tires. No, don't do any of that. Be as graceful as possible, right? I think one of the best, it hurts, right? It is an ego thing, and it is an ego stab in your heart, and you just have to go. just keep a brave face while you're in front of colleagues, etc., and be as polite as possible because it is a small world. I do not care who you are. I do not care what job you're in. Somebody knows somebody who knows somebody's sister, who knows who's married to somebody who knows you in the next company you go to. It is a small world.Lesley Logan 32:18  Yes.Clare Solly 32:18  Or it'll get back to you in some weird way, 20 years in the future. We are in a social media-heavy world where everybody knows everything. And I'm not saying you have to be happy about it. I am just saying don't go crazy, just try to hold everything in. And you might,in the back of your mind now, because I generally kind of knew when either I was unhappy or my company was unhappy with me, and I knew, because I've been fired, I'm going to say I've been fired four times. You know, once was like a redundancy, once was because the manager hated me, and I can't remember the other two times, but I've been fired a decent amount, and it hurts every time. And no matter how prepared for it you are, you're never prepared for it. So just kind of pick up on the clues in the background, and just don't sit there every day going, "Oh, I'm going to get fired," but maybe start, you know, hit the rewind button, listen to the beginning of this podcast, this episode, and kind of prepare, and then be as graceful as possible. Get your things together as quickly as possible. Don't talk to anyone that still works for the company. Lesley Logan 33:28  Yeah I agree. Clare Solly 33:29  Even if you have a BFF that works for the company, like, especially don't put anything in writing, don't blast anybody, because a lot of times if you are being let go, they're giving you some sort of package, hopefully.Lesley Logan 33:42  Yeah, I would hope so. And I think, even if they don't, even if they're terrible, even for the worst, I just want to reiterate, like, you might end up somewhere, even two jobs from now, where there's someone else who worked there. It just happens, and you don't want your worst day to be the thing that people remember about you when they see you next time, or when someone does ask. Like, sometimes people do call your references in your past jobs, sometimes they call your past jobs, and you don't want the tone of voice to change. So I think... but that's why you go to these new rage stations, and then you break things.Clare Solly 34:27  Definitely go to a rage station.Lesley Logan 34:28  So, okay, so don't burn the bridges, that's good. Go to a rage place, yay! But, like.Clare Solly 34:34  Have a safe friend to talk to, like, that doesn't work at your company.Lesley Logan 34:39  This is good advice for everything. Have someone to talk to about everybody who doesn't know the people involved.Clare Solly 34:45  You know, and maybe that's somebody you pay, maybe that's a therapist, maybe that's a safe space. I would sort of stay away from telling your mom or your dad, or close family, because family always has opinions on these kind of things.Lesley Logan 34:58  Until you're ready. I do think that there are certain things... you kind of have to get your wits about you before you tell the people. It depends on how your relationship is with them, but if they're opinionated, and you often feel like you're constantly letting them know, "I'm not a child anymore." You know, it's the same as a breakup. I don't tell people until I'm like, you have to heal from things before you talk about it sometimes.Clare Solly 35:18  So you're human, and we all try things, and we fail things, and failures are hard, and you don't need somebody poking at your failures or asking you. Like, my least favorite thing is when a relationship ends, people are like, "And when are you going to date?"Lesley Logan 35:35  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like, "I just got fired. Okay, so is your resume together?" But I will say a tip: maybe have a little thing in your calendar, like every six months, that you just update your resume. Clare Solly 35:47  Yeah. I get mine updated, so (inaudible).Lesley Logan 35:50  Yeah, so it's ready to go, because you just never know these days. You never, you never know, like, people think that the companies will be around forever, and they're not. So I think that that's a really, I think also I just want to highlight what you're saying, it's like, I think you need to grieve a little bit.Clare Solly 36:02  Yeah.Lesley Logan 36:03  Because maybe you had ideas about what that job could be or what it was going to let you do. I do think a little grieving process is important.Clare Solly 36:11  Well, and no matter if you are let go, if you are given severance, or if you are choosing to leave a job, I highly recommend making sure you give yourself space. Make sure you take a week off between jobs, take a couple of weeks, make sure you can, or try your best to afford that. But before you start running again in any capacity, you have to decompress. We take vacations for ourselves from the jobs that we're currently in; we need to do that as well when we are doing anything involved with work.Lesley Logan 36:48  I love this idea, so it's like, call the unemployment office first thing, yeah, call your therapist, and then take a beat, just a beat.Clare Solly 36:57  Take a beat,Lesley Logan 36:58  Yeah, maybe, so hopefully, usually they fire you on a Friday, so hopefully you can take the weekend, like use some credit card points, get a hotel.Clare Solly 37:05  Yeah.Lesley Logan 37:06  You know.Clare Solly 37:06  I mean, I've rage-updated my resume before, and it never works that well, and I have to redo it all.Lesley Logan 37:11  Okay, so don't, so you're saying go grieve first, then resume later.Clare Solly 37:15  Yeah, yeah. I mean, still check in with the unemployment office, and still check in with like your therapist, and I would check in with your bank account and make sure that you're good there.Lesley Logan 37:24  Yeah, yeah, I agree. I think that, you know... but I do think you're allowed to be upset, you're allowed to be sad, you're allowed to be frustrated, you're allowed to be like, "The reason this happened is because of them."Clare Solly 37:35  Yeah.Lesley Logan 37:35  But also, depending on where you live in the states—I don't know how it works in the rest of the world—but I'm of the management style that you kind of are quitting on me before I fire you. I'm giving you talks, and those talks... at least in California, I had to give you written notices, and these are the dates you've improved these things by, so if you're around number two or three, they're probably not happy with you. So you can plan for that, but if you can't, it is out of your control, and it happens sooner than you thought. I do think grief and taking a pause is really nice.Clare Solly 38:12  Yeah, and I think, too, to some extent, when you were saying that, it just kind of came to my head, like, maybe just when you're in a thoughtful moment, and you can handle that thought, just write yourself just like a little exit plan in your notes app in your phone or something like that. So that... we have an emergency strategy if your house is on fire, right? You know where the exits are. Maybe you just give yourself that when you're in a good space. You know, what are my steps that I need to take? Who are my emergency contacts? Where am I in the level-set of money and my trajectory, and all that?Lesley Logan 38:49  I also think, even if it was your dream job, I would sit down and journal. I would write down all the things that you hated about it, and all the things you loved about it, right? This is something we do all the time. Like, when people are like, "I need to get a scheduling tool," I'm like, "Write down all the things you want it to do, like, what are your dream things?" Same as if you're going to date someone where they have to have these qualities. I would say take a moment to think about what is the stuff that you loved about that job, and then what are the things that you fucking hated, even as a dream job. There are always things that are irritating, like working for anybody is irritating, so it has irritating moments. So I would write that down, because that way, when you are updating your resume, you're updating it with the ideas of the qualities you want to enhance and highlight, and you're looking for the jobs that have the keywords that are in the love section, and you are a little bit more aware of the things where you're like, "I don't do well in these spaces." Yeah, if you're not a team player, then a job that is like, "You're going to be working on this team, and it's integral that you work with the team," you can go, "Oh, I need a more solo job." It's okay.Clare Solly 39:47  Yeah. And then also, instead of trying to... because the instinct is to pick at yourself and go, "What did I do wrong? What was wrong with me?" Right? We do that in any kind of relationship, whether it is a work relationship or a personal relationship. We focus it back on ourselves, and sometimes it's not you. I mean, sometimes it is, but sometimes it's just not what you're capable of, or not the skills that you have, or not the education you have. So when you start taking yourself apart, turn it back positively. And maybe instead of sitting there... we all get to mourn, right? We all get to mourn, we all get to hurt. But instead of sitting there and picking apart yourself and panicking about not having a job, go on YouTube and look up some skill videos. Yeah, go to university websites and take a look at courses.Lesley Logan 40:46  Universities give courses for free.Clare Solly 40:47  Yeah, and if you find yourself sort of like rage-scrolling through LinkedIn or something like that, looking at your colleagues or looking at people that have similar jobs to you, look at their resumes and go, "What are the skills they have? What can I add to my resume that makes me more excitable as a hire? What am I missing?" and just kind of re-level set yourself.Lesley Logan 41:07  Yeah.Clare Solly 41:08  Instead of going internal, look to the external and see how you can grow, and be it till you see it.Lesley Logan 41:15  I love that. Oh my god, we could talk forever on this topic because I feel like there's just so much to say, but I do feel like that's some great, helpful stuff because being it till you see it often isn't staying where you are, it's acting like the person you want to be when you're there, and that can mean building an exit strategy, or it could mean letting go of the place that you're at. So I love this, Clare. We're going to take a brief break, and then we're going to find out where people can find you, follow you, connect with you, and get your Be It Action Items. Lesley Logan 41:44  Okay, Clare, where do you hang out these days?Clare Solly 41:48  I am still on the Instagram as a bookstagrammer. You can find me at @YouWontBeSolly on the Instagram and the TikTok, although I'm slow to post these days. You can find me and my books at www.claresolly.com Clare with no I, and there will be more news in a couple of years once I get that PhD rolling and going.Lesley Logan 42:08  I know. I'll have to have you back on for that. "How did you 'be it till you see it' to call yourself a doctor?"Clare Solly 42:13  I know, I'm so excited I'm here. Schedule me now for that. Set your alarms. And I would say for this topic, my Be It Action Items.Lesley Logan 42:21  Bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it until they see it. I mean, I know you know the thing, but I gotta say it, you know, for the new listeners.Clare Solly 42:29  I love it. New listeners.Lesley Logan 42:30  New listeners, this is the section where they tell us your action items.Clare Solly 42:35  I mean, I think take a look at yourself, where you are, look at where you can improve, and create an exit strategy if you are ready to leave, just so you have it. In a sane moment, you're ready to go when you have that crazy moment later.Lesley Logan 42:53  Yeah, yeah, I think it's important. Why not, while you don't need to do it, think about what to do, because it is really hard to do it when you, unless you're like me, and you're clear-headed when the shoe drops.Clare Solly 43:09  Yeah.Lesley Logan 43:10  And some people are, but I think a lot of people need a little more time to wrap their heads around it, and that's okay.Clare Solly 43:15  We think about retirement, we think about when our job is ending towards the end of our life, we think about again when you're in a fire situation, when you're in an earthquake situation, like, we practice those things. And even though it feels a little bit like dun dun dun to think about the ending of your job, if you prepare for it now, you'll be ready for it when it happens. If it happens, maybe it won't, maybe you'll be forever in your job and happy.Lesley Logan 43:41  Yeah, well, I hope so. Okay, thanks so much, Clare, for being you and bringing up this topic. I think this is so fun. You guys, make sure you tell us which parts of this you loved, and I know it's more conversational if you're used to listening to this, but I think that that's also even more fun. So I'm kind of into that as well. And share this with a friend who needs to hear it, share with a friend who's like constantly complaining about their job—like, you don't have to be their coach for them. Guess what, you could just go, "Wow, you should listen to the Be It Till You See It podcast, yeah, with Lesley and Clare on this topic." And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 44:11  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 44:53  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 44:58  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 45:03  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 45:10  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 45:13  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this FYF episode, Lesley Logan celebrates teaching the largest audience of her career — and why getting out of her comfort zone in a massive way became the win worth honoring. She shares a relatable airport moment about inconsistent TSA experiences, lifts up community wins from listeners with new Pilates equipment and health recoveries, and shares why the things that scare you are often the things you're meant to be doing. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The new FYF format pairing every "moment" with a win.Lesley's frustration with inconsistent TSA rules across U.S. airports.Why teaching her largest-ever audience stretched Lesley's comfort zone.Leah's classical reformer and Sheilz's active body recovery.Episode References/Links:Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsIn this episode you will learn about:How new interests reveal we're outgrowing old versions of ourselves.Why losing touch with people during growth isn't personal or final.Why judging your old self is a sign you need gratitude practice.Evaluating what to take with you and what to let go.Working backwards from your future self to take action today.Episode References/Links:Ep. 3 with Rob Mack - https://beitpod.com/ep3Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's fuck yeah Friday. Lesley Logan 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:47  Hey, Be It babe, how are you? Welcome to our Friday episode. Oh my God, and on this Friday, it is a special. It's my dad's 74th birthday, so there's that. That's not what this episode's about. So we used to celebrate something inspiring on the internet, but let's be real, the internet's not so inspiring. It usually makes me pissed off at someone's rights we're losing. So we're changing it to something we actually do in our community. So if you're an Agency member, an eLevate member, you know the drill. You are allowed to need a moment. Sometimes you can complain, but you have to immediately have a win. So it's gonna go the thing I need a moment about, then my win, so I don't just vomit on you, or it could be someone else's moment and their win, like Brad's or a friend who says any, and then it's your win. And if you want to need a moment and have a win, you can send that in to beitpod.com/questions. We'll have to change that link, but for now, beitpod.com/questions will allow you to fill out a form, and then we can shout your wins and moments out if you want. But you can't send a moment in without a win, so don't come complaining at me and not have a win. Don't make me come ask for it. I'm just gonna go, not even listening, not here to just take the dump. You got to have both. Lesley Logan 1:56  So, my moment right now is, okay, I am at the airport on this date, and think about this airport. I actually like this airport that I have to fly out of. But what annoys me is that this TSA is different than other TSAs. And how come, in the US, every airport, whether I have TSA PreCheck, Clear, I'm shoved in with the regular people, sorry, people who are regular people, I'm shoved into the regular security, but with a sign that I have TSA. How come it's different? How come sometimes your shoes are on, sometimes your shoes are off, sometimes there's a computer in, sometimes it's not? And then they yell at you like you should know. I'm like, oh, should I take the computer out? No. And it's like, okay, right. But the last airport I was just at yesterday wanted my computer. These are not stupid questions. I'm not an idiot. I can hear you, you know, I'm sure. And here's a, I know your job sucks. We don't pay you when our government doesn't do its fucking work, you know? So I get it, but also, especially if I'm in TSA PreCheck or Clear, I clearly am someone who flies a lot. So treat me a little bit like it's a legit question, that's all I'm saying. And also, is it too much to ask that we're either keeping the shoes on, we're keeping them off, we're putting the computers in the bags, we're taking them out? Just have a sign, then that would be really easy. A lot of the signs they have are outdated, so you're doing what the sign says, and they're like, why are you doing that? It's like, because the sign back there said so. Just pissing me off. Lesley Logan 3:04  My win, since I just got all that out, my win that I'm celebrating, though, is that last month I taught at this really amazing, massive event. I taught the most people I've ever taught in my life in one space. I had the most fun doing it. I got out of my comfort zone in a massive way, a massive way. I stayed up later than I normally ever would, and I had a good time. And I just want to say, this old dog can do new tricks, right? So I'm really celebrating the fact that I've put myself into a situation that was a little bit out of my comfort zone, a lot of it outside of my comfort zone, but in order to spread the word of Pilates, and I got to do it in a big, massive way. And now I'm like, how can I do that all the time? That was a cool stage. I want to do that all the time. So, you never know. The things that scare you are the things that you're supposed to be doing, you know? Lesley Logan 4:09  So, okay, your wins. Leah sent, "My first classical reformer tower combo and Wunda Chair were delivered this week." Cool, Leah, that's so cool. I'm excited for you. Let me know if you have any questions on how to use it. I can't wait to see. If you're an OPC member, send videos of you doing exercises that you're confused on, and I'll give you feedback on that. And then, @justsheilz wrote, "Glad I was able to remain active recovering from three surgical procedures this year." You get that, Shields. You know what? Sometimes we just have health years, right? We just have them, and we have to go, okay, well, what can't I do? All right, thanks for that. And then focus on what you can do, and really lean into that. So, way to go, Shieldz. I'm so grateful for you. I'm also grateful that you join us each and every week on Sundays. Your feedback is wonderful, your questions are great, and your support is lovely. And I know that even though your body might still be recovering from some things, it's learning it, it's hearing it, and it's going to embody it when the time is right. So thank you so much. Lesley Logan 5:08  Okay, send your wins in, guys, because it's fun. Because when you hear it, it's like a month or two after you send it in, and you're probably having a bad day, and you're like, oh gosh, this is annoying. And then you hear your win, and you're like, oh, I had a great day the other day. How cool is that? All right, your mantra. My uniqueness is a beautiful part of me. My uniqueness is a beautiful part of me. My uniqueness is a beautiful part of me. Babe, your uniqueness is a beautiful part of you because, oh my God, if you were the same as everyone else, it would be boring, and you'd still have imposter syndrome. So ditch all those feelings, focus on your uniqueness, because it is a beautiful part of you. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.Lesley Logan 5:44  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 6:27  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 6:32  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 6:36  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 6:43  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 6:46  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Outgrowing yourself rarely happens gracefully — and that's okay. In part two of the Outgrowing Old Versions series, Lesley Logan walks through the action of letting go, why hindsight breeds shame, and how dreaming a year forward helps you step into who you want to be. A grounded invitation to outgrow what no longer fits. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How new interests reveal we're outgrowing old versions of ourselves.Why losing touch with people during growth isn't personal or final.Why judging your old self is a sign you need gratitude practice.Evaluating what to take with you and what to let go.Working backwards from your future self to take action today.Episode References/Links:Ep. 3 with Rob Mack - https://beitpod.com/ep3Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Isn't that how versions of ourselves start? We get a new interest, and then we kind of go into that thing, and then we learn something, and then we grow into that, and then all of a sudden we don't necessarily need some of the things that we had, whether they're coping mechanisms or jobs or relationships. We can outgrow ourselves in so many different ways, and I think we always will.Lesley Logan 0:22  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:04  Hello, Be It babe. How are you? Okay, we're back with part two. So, if you're new to the Be It Pod, we have some weeks where we do an interview and a recap episode, and we have some weeks where we do a series and we talk about a topic that you guys have written in and said, "I want to have more information," or "I want to hear more about this," or "This is how I'm feeling. What do you think?" And so hopefully the personal stories and experiences and anecdotes help you feel not so alone in the topic, right? Lesley Logan 1:31  So we're talking about outgrowing yourself, a version of yourself, and so if you haven't listened to the first episode, I would do that because I actually want to reference some stories from that, and I'm not going to tell them again in such great detail. So, anyways, let's get into it. Right? Here we go. So okay, last episode we talked about outgrowing old versions of yourselves, and I highlighted, with grace and compassion, not the shame and blame, because it can be really easy to do that. Lesley Logan 1:57  And so, this week we're actually going to talk about the actual action of letting go, and then the action steps of being in your new version, right? So the stories that I brought up were inspired because I actually was looking at old photos of myself starting as a Pilates instructor, and then I shared these two instances of when I outgrew the retail version of me to be the Pilates instructor, and then I outgrew being the Pilates studio manager, teacher, trainer, all the things, to just working myself as a Pilates business coach and Pilates instructor. And I really will say there wasn't this green sign, green light, like, "Hello, Lesley, this is the door," right? No, I kind of realized I outgrew those roles and that version of me kind of kicking and screaming, getting so frustrated and exhausted because I had taken on so much trying to start this new thing that I was into, as opposed to a hobby, and now it's a full-time job, but I also have a full-time job, and then, wow, now I can take on Pilates full time, and this job has health insurance and a salary, and room to grow and expand, and I learned so much there, and I was challenged, and I got to be a big fish in a small pond, up to the day that I was about to have a panic attack because I was overworking myself trying to fulfill the agreements that I had made as an employee while trying to explore these new interests I have. And isn't that how versions of ourselves start? We get a new interest, and then we kind of go into that thing, and then we learn something, and then we grow into that, and then all of a sudden we don't necessarily need some of the things that we had, whether they're coping mechanisms or jobs or relationships. We can outgrow ourselves in so many different ways, and I think we always will. Lesley Logan 3:44  Now, I will say, I don't feel very confident that either of the changes that I made I did gracefully. I look back and see maybe if I know what I know now about how I could land on my own two feet and be as resourceful as I am, if I had that evidence, I could have had the guts to just quit the first time and not try to have one foot on an island and one foot on a canoe, and stand there, and still, and not lose my balance. And I also will say, the second time I outgrew that version of me, I didn't necessarily, I thought I could do it all, and I didn't really want to let go of some of the things because I liked the people I worked with, I liked the people I worked for. There are some things I hated, and that made the job really annoying, but those were detail-oriented things, so of course I didn't like them. But I really thought I could do both for a long time. But what happened along the way in there, and doing both for a long time, is that there was this part of me that was, "I'm really interested in this impact over here, and I can't do it as long as I'm doing this."  Lesley Logan 4:50  And so, I also will say, part of the way that I tend to, I tended, I will say, I'll put it in the past tense, I tended to become this new version of me is I lost touch with some of those relationships. In fact, when I posted that picture, one of the people who commented is one of the people that I lost touch with, probably within the first year of quitting retail, and I really liked her. And I still, every couple of years I'll be in Palm Springs, I'll connect with her because that's where she moved, and so she reminded me that I taught her in her house, in her apartment. Oh my god, this person helped me out, and I kind of lost touch. But because we do that, right, when your schedule changes, because the new version of you needs this schedule, right? The new version of you needs to be doing these things, or studying these things, or spending time in these areas, it means that we tend to lose people in our lives, and it doesn't have to be personal, not personal at all. Lesley Logan 5:48  There was a couple of people I definitely was ready to write off, but the people that I worked with in both of those arenas, the ones I lost touch with, I will say most of the time it just happened because life happens, because we get busy. And back then it wasn't as easy as it is now, but even now we're even busier, right? I can proudly say that I'm still dear friends with several of the people that I worked with at the second place, and in outgrowing the version of myself, they didn't get mad or turn their backs on me. I mean, in fact, they celebrated it because they could say they were part of that. So when you do feel this need to grow, and you're outgrowing what you once were, you have different worries and different schedules, and different relationships get added in. And because of all these different changes that you're making, because it's in alignment with where you want to grow, yeah, you might lose some things, you might lose some people. There's a coffee shop that I used to go to when we lived in LA every single day. I do wonder where those people are now. I hope they're not there anymore, but I do wonder, because you lose touch. Lesley Logan 6:48  And so I just want to say, you don't ever have to apologize for the growth that you're making, for getting to know yourself more, and/or for changing your mind. We definitely should be as graceful as we can when we make our exits, and I can say that I think I did as good a job as I could given the circumstances on those exits, but the today version of me would have made those exits completely differently and might have been able to find a way to stay in touch with a few of the people extra. So I will just say we usually do the best we can with what we have, and when we know better, we do better. And so just have some kindness for yourself because, depending on how many times you've outgrown a version of yourself, it might be the first time you're making these changes and making mistakes and learning new things. And so be thoughtful, right? Be thoughtful of yourself, but not just of others, because I think it's easy to do that. Lesley Logan 7:41  Okay, so when we look back, and hopefully you did if you listened to Tuesday's episode, I asked you to look back and look at the signs that were showing up that you were ready to outgrow and make changes and let go of, right? When we do that, we tend to look back at them as simpler times and like, "Oh, I should have just been happy." I think about when we look at pictures of ourselves when we were five, ten years ago, going, "Oh my god, why didn't I think I looked good? Why did I think I looked heavy, or whatever?" Like, "Oh my god, I look so good there." So we tend to do that with these rose-colored glasses, and I will just say life was not simpler back when that was because that version of you didn't have the skill sets you have today. So when you look back at life and you're like, "Oh my god, I should have just been happy about that," no, you have new skill sets, you have new abilities to handle things. And so, when you look back at that life, it seems like it was simple. It wasn't simple, but you didn't have the tools that you have now. Lesley Logan 8:33  And when you were that person, there were needs and desires that were not being met. That is why you got to where you are today, why you have your "be it till you see it" goals, who you want to become, because the life that you have wasn't satisfying you for some reason, there was something missing that you went searching for, and you grew, and you outgrew. And it doesn't mean that who you were was silly, stupid, wrong, or dumb; it's just an old version. I look back, I'm like, "Wow." I was so anti-transparent, and now I still put sunscreen on, but goodness, a little bit of sun, a little bit of freckle is not a bad thing. But I think of another example of outgrowing a version of yourself, like my first iPhone versus today's iPhone. When the first iPhone came out, we were like, "Oh my god, what an incredible phone. How lucky am I that I could have this phone?" And now, if we were to use that iPhone, like my dad has an old iPhone, and I'm like, "Oh, such shit, so outdated." And we would not, we didn't do that then. You can't do that to yourself. You can't take an old version of yourself and go, "Oh my god, what an idiot," because back in the day, it was pretty unique who you were and what you were doing, and you were this amazing invention and a slice of time that we'll never have back. So we have to be thoughtful and kind, and know that because our standards change, that doesn't mean that who we were before wasn't good enough. They just had different standards, and we know more, we know better, we have new standards, right? We have new needs. Lesley Logan 10:11  Example, when it comes to you outgrowing, okay, so you've outgrown a version of yourself, you're stepping into your new thing, you're being it till you see it, and you're feeling a little exhausted, frustrated, even still getting resentful, like things feel like they're not moving along. We'll get more into stuckness later, but you're trying, you're doing what I was doing in the last episode where I was like, "I'm gonna hold on to this job and do this job." And the reality is, once you start growing into this new version, it's really hard to go back. Once you learn that the Wizard of Oz is just a person behind the curtain and it's not the Wizard, it's kind of hard to put the toothpaste back in the tube, so as they say. So, hope this example works. Brad had this weird thing about he keeps our old iPhones, and then every time we get a new iPhone, he gets rid of our oldest iPhones, but we always have older ones lying around, and sometimes he even uses them. And part of it is he's worried, like, "Oh my gosh, what if I don't have all that I need that's on that phone? What if I forgot something's there?" That was a great phone to me. I really liked how it felt. That's kind of like us trying to hold on to people who no longer fit where we're growing, or schedules, maybe you are trying to do your own thing, but you're holding on to your old life schedules, right? Like when we moved to Vegas, I was trying so hard to do the schedule that I had in LA because I loved that schedule. But not only was I no longer an Angelino, I was a Las Vegan, it was COVID, there was no schedule to keep. I had to change, I had to outgrow that, I had to let it go, right? So I'm not saying you have to get rid of anyone in your life, or the schedule, or the cars, or the clothes when you outgrow yourself, but what I am saying is that to fully step into the new version of yourself, we do have to evaluate what has to change so that I can fully be this person. Is this schedule, the cadence of when I see people in my life, that has to change? Do I need more sleep to be this person? My god, the younger me could just do a lot on no sleep. My goodness. Like, is the life in the version I am right now someone who cannot handle complaining about things from 20 years ago in our life? Lesley Logan 12:34  So I do think, to fully outgrow a version of yourself, besides space and grace and compassion for who you were and who you're becoming, it is important to evaluate what are you taking with you and what are you letting go, and that's the action steps we have to take as we outgrow the version of ourselves. What is no longer serving us? What is taking up space? And, by the way, some of this stuff will just change naturally. When I changed from being in retail to working Pilates, the clothing was pretty easy to change, the job is to wear leg gings, but not all of it is easy; it just takes some time. But the action step you can take is to make sure that the steps you're taking each day are towards the version you want to be, and not the version that you once were, because you're just gonna get frustrated. I mean, it's kind of like I made this example earlier, but I'm gonna say it again because I want you to have a visual. When I was trying to keep the old stuff and the new stuff, it is like having one foot on an island and one foot on a canoe. When we moved to Vegas, we're like, oh, we'll go back to LA every month, every four weeks we'll have our same hairdressers and our same lash technicians and our same blah blah blah, and see our friends. Y'all, we haven't been back in eight months, right? Because while that story felt really good, the version that we were becoming by living here made it really hard to go back there because those people, by the way, it's not that they don't want to see us, it's not that we don't see them, but they were in their version of their lives, and we're coming in every four weeks going, "Hey, hang out with us!" And it's like they're like, "Well, this night doesn't work, I got things to do." So, sometimes I think we are trying to cobble and hold everything together from all parts of our lives, and the truth is, we just have to take a moment to go,okay, hold on. Who do I want to be? What does she do? What does she eat? Where does she go to work? Where is all this different stuff? So that you can step into that power. And then some things will naturally just go away, and some things, some people will step up so they can stay in. Or you might still keep the old car, even though you've changed, because that's practical, right? Not saying go out and buy the new car because that's what she would drive. We have to take some actions in making sure that the life that we want to live is actually in alignment with who we're growing in to be and not who we used to be. Lesley Logan 14:56  It's important you're also not playing the hindsight game. I talked a little about this in the last episode, but I think when I was going back to LA, I would drive around, and I could go, oh, I lived here, and you think about who you were, and the mistakes you made, and that I lived here, and, oh my god, even when I did this, you know more now, so we can't go into hindsight and go, I would have done this better, or I should have done that sooner or I should have quit that sooner or I should have let that relationship end that time. Oh my gosh, I'm going to tell you a story, but first I just want to close that sentence off with any type of judgment like that is shame, and it's not helpful. In fact, when you are judging yourself for who you used to be, it is actually a sign you have to have a gratitude practice, and this is something I worked with my therapist about. As I was evolving into the space that I am now, in 2020 she was like, "If you are judging yourself, that means you are not in gratitude." And so if you get in gratitude, judgment can't be there. Gratitude and judgment can't live in the same space at the same time, can't hold space for both. And so I just would say, if you find yourself getting frustrated or judgmental, take a moment to be like, "I'm grateful that I made this change, I'm grateful that I learned this thing, I'm grateful that I said yes to that thing," because it will help you realize you did the best you could back then with what you knew. Hey, so the story I wanted to share before I got those things out is, I remember, this is a hindsight game, I remember it was one day, a year before I broke up with my ex, I remember driving on the freeway and going, "Oh my god, I wish he would just break up with me because I don't know how to break up with him." And then staying for another year, only to finally have the capacity to blow it all up, and that's really what I did. That version of me had not spent enough time to really fully figure out who she was going to be, but I did that on my summer couch tour. Sometimes you have to do that, right? Sometimes you have to do that. But I remember thinking, "Oh my god, if I had just done this a year ago," and it's like, yeah, that would have been great, and I also would not have had the friends that I had, whose couches I slept on, for sure. Would not have had that. I would not have had the things that happened in that summer that gave me time and space and a schedule that allowed me to really grow into myself, the single version of myself, the woman that I really think, because I did that, is why I'm here today, and it's definitely why I have the friendships that I have and the business that I have, for sure, the things that happened during that time. Lesley Logan 17:28  So I just share that with you because, yes, it would have been nice if you made changes sooner or said yes to things sooner, but also you didn't have those tool sets yet. And so now that you are taking action, having compassion for who you were and gratitude is going to take you a long way, and it's going to make becoming the next version of yourself fun and a little more possible. Look, part of letting go and shifting is where "be it till you see it" works the best. If you are kind of in that in-between, you have the one foot on the island and one foot on the boat, it is time to sit down and just talk about, okay, it's a year from now. Who are you? Where do you live? What do you do? What's your schedule like? When do you get up? When do you go to sleep? When do you have time with your partner? When do you have time with your friends? When do you have time to do this? What are the hobbies that you have? And then you can just dream so big and think, okay, so based on this, how do I work backwards to be this woman? Oh, I'm someone who knows how to knit; I guess I'm going to a knitting class, right? I know I made that really simple, but truly, that is how you become the version of yourself that you want to be. I wanted to be a Pilates business coach and have a studio, and so I would tell people before I left the other gig, and I was still just renting space and doing some coaching, I'll just tell people, "What do you do?" "Oh, I coach Pilates businesses on how to be more profitable and have the impact they want to make, and I teach privates on the side." I started telling people that, even though the majority of my time was teaching Pilates. I would tell people that because, in telling people that, I was telling them who I was growing into, who I wanted to become. And then the hours that I wish I was coaching, I would actually be marketing my coaching services because then I spent time being the person I wanted to be. So when you are in this outgrow stage, growing-in stage, the best thing you can do is dream about like you're on the other side. Who are you? And then work backwards and "be it till you see it" that way. Lesley Logan 19:36  It's also important to remember you don't become someone new overnight; you do become her in moments. And I love looking back at those moments and saying, "Oh, that's when I was like, oh, that moment and that moment and that moment compounded to here we are right now." Those moments often happen before you're even aware that it's time to make a change, but they will keep adding up and adding up. And it's important to keep taking steps, the messy action, and continue to do what you can with what you have. We have a great episode, I think it's episode three, where our guests talked about how you're never going to see the top of the stairs, but you can see the first step, and so you take that first step. And guess what happens when you take the first step? The next step reveals itself. If you listen to the intro of this podcast, right, we talk about it all the time, action brings clarity, it's an antidote to fear. And Be It babe, most of the time we're not stepping into where we want to be; we're keeping the old version of ourselves because we can't see the top of the stairs yet. But you can dream about it, and you can take the messy action, and you can have kindness and gratitude for yourself and others along the way. You do the best you can, and what happens is one day you're the person you want to be, you're the new version of yourself. And look, here's the deal, if you are doing these things but you're stuck, that's going to be our next series. Lesley Logan 21:02  So, if you're feeling stuck, if you've been waiting for motivation, if you feel like you know what you want but you're not doing it, I need you to know it's not because you're lazy. You didn't go into some old version of yourself; things become lazy. It's probably because you're still operating the new version of you on the old system. When we use old computers or old phones, how slow they are, right? The spinning wheel of death comes up. Yeah, that's just because you're trying to do the new you on the old system. So we're gonna dive in deeper to that in our next series, but until then, take messy action, be it till you see it. It's a pretty great thing to shed something that no longer serves you and step into something that does. So, thanks so much, love. I hope this series was fun for you. Let me know what your takeaways are, your favorite parts, or topics you want us to touch on. Share this with a friend who is maybe outgrowing themselves and needs to know that they're not alone, and they didn't do anything wrong, and this is a really great thing. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 22:08  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 22:50  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 22:55  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 23:00  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 23:07  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 23:10  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you outgrown a version of yourself but haven't fully let her go? In this first installment of a two-part series, Lesley Logan opens up about the quiet, often uncomfortable process of recognizing you've changed, and the signs that gradually show up. Pulling from her own career pivots from retail manager to Pilates instructor to business owner, she shares how resentment, shame, and nostalgia signal it's time to let her go. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Why outgrowing happens slowly before it happens all at once.How resentment can be a signal that something needs to change.The trap of trying to be "both people" mid-transition.Replacing vibes with data when you're ready for the next move.The real reason letting an old version go feels like grief.Episode References/Links:Ep. 163 with Claire Sparrow - http://beitpod.com/ep163Betsey Johnson – https://www.betseyjohnson.comProfitable Pilates: Everything But the Exercises by Lesley Logan - https://a.co/d/0hTekOJlSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It is one thing to realize you've outgrown a version of yourself, and it's another entirely different thing to let her go, because it's emotional. You can be forced to outgrow different things, because situations changed, and you can make those decisions yourself. But either way, like, we're all gonna go through it. Lesley Logan 0:20  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:02  Well, hey Be It babe. Hello, welcome to a series with me. No guest today, it's me. We're talking about outgrowing who you used to be without having shame and guilt, and this weird thing that we tend to do to ourselves when we're overachievers and recovering perfectionists, which is, "Oh my god, I should have known better." But that's not it at all; we're always here to learn and grow. Hopefully, if you do this life right, you are always learning and growing, right? So it's interesting because I think this could be a really subtle thing, because I think outgrowing who you are does happen in subtle ways. I guess it could happen in fast, big ways, but I do think it's actually kind of a volcano. There's things brewing underneath for a long time, and then it's, "I'm ready to come out, I'm ready to be here." So it's also really big, outgrowing who you used to be. Lesley Logan 1:52  The other day, when I recorded this, I posted on my Instagram account a series of photos of me from, I said they are from 2010, I'm pretty convinced the first photo is from 2008, right after I became a Pilates instructor, and I'd been inspired by Claire Sparrow, who's a guest on our podcast. She's like, "Hey, look, I posted a picture of me as a baby instructor, you should post a picture of you." And it was so cute, and she kind of, I was like, "I think I should do that, especially because I've just not been loving social media lately." I'm like, "Why not? Why not do this thing, right?" So, anyways, I was like, "Do I even have those photos?" Of course, I don't. My phone, the photos kind of really start from 2013 because the cloud didn't really exist, and so you would have, I guess, keep things. I'm not really sure. In fact, to be honest, I have pictures of myself as a child, and I have pictures of myself since my iPhone started. How did I have as many pictures of myself, now that I think about it, from between high school through college and my retail work, which is such a bummer, because what great outfits I would have had. Lesley Logan 2:56  Anyways, I went on Facebook, and I went to my old profile and cover photos, and I actually did find these photos. And you guys, just so you remember, if you all go back in time 16 and 18 years ago, you'd hire photographers to take pictures of you doing something. Now you just set up a thing, click your watch, your phone takes great pictures. Now, I have to hire photographers, and now looking at these photos, I'm like, "Wow, I thought those were great photos. Look at the quality of those photos." No offense to the photographers who took them, but, man, I mean, my goodness, if cameras can outgrow themselves, we certainly can. So I was going through the photos, and one of the things I saw was, "Wow, I was young." And not that I look old now, not by any stretch of the imagination—I'm not saying that, I don't even think I am old—but I am looking at those photos. I have to just be honest, when people say that they think I look like I'm in my 30s, I look like I am a child in some of these photos. Holy cow, people let me go into bars looking like that? Oh my god. So I definitely... okay, this is a side tangent, but welcome to ADHD. You know how when you watch Pretty in Pink and 16 Candles, they all look like such adults, and we're like, "We didn't look like that. Why do we...?" I don't know, because I look back and I'm like, "Oh my god, I look like a high schooler," and I was a graduate from college by several years. But anyways, so the first thing I thought was how young I was, and, whoa, when was my hair brown? I forgot I had brown hair. It's not the hair color that I have now, but the first photo, if you look at it, my hair is brown, and then it slowly gets to red, and then even more blonde-red, which is closer to what it is today, and it was super short, and that was in 2010. Lesley Logan 4:42  The third thing that I thought was that I am so different from this girl. I'm so different—not in a bad or a sad way, just 16 to 18 years of having outgrown her. The clothes she wore, I'm even like, "What am I wearing?" Styles do change, but, what? I mean, they're cute, they're all Lululemon. Hey, from a baby instructor, I was buying the brand designer. But the way I dated, I'm obviously not with that person, but I remember looking at this picture going, "Oh, I know who I was with at that time. Oh my god, oh my god, what was I into?" And I also, going back, I was thinking about the expectations I had, the fears I had, the dreams I had, the goals that version of me set. I'm so different from that person—the risks that I would take, all of that. Anyways, it was kind of funny to look at those photos and go through that, and then go, oh, I'm recording an 'Outgrowing Your Old Version of Yourself' podcast. How hilarious is that? On this pod, we actually have a lot of guests who talk about, "I used to be here, this happened to me, and now I'm here," right? And it's all great, it's all inspiring, it's all super helpful. Sometimes we get some really detailed nuggets, but I don't think we acknowledge or take the time to talk about the shedding process. What does it feel like to let go of that, right? Lesley Logan 6:13  So, this week will be two parts about growing your old self. So, we're going to talk awareness in comparison today, and then Thursday we'll get into the release and action, just so, because I know you guys like a roadmap. You guys like a roadmap. And by the way, if you do love our podcast, one of the best ways you can do to support our podcast is being an OPC member, so I do hope you check us out, what we're doing there, because there we do a lot about connecting to who we are and what we want, and if you are feeling like you want to outgrow the version that you're in, OPC is a great place to be. Lesley Logan 6:43  Okay, so let's get into kind of just like I think, I think to outgrow yourself, I think would just be fun. I feel I have a lot of stories. So let's just talk about when I became a Pilates instructor, I was still managing a retail store and high-end accessories, and I really thought I could do both. In fact, I wanted to do both, and I don't know that I am trying to think back, like, did I not think I could? Did I not think I could make a living teaching? It's possible, especially because my first year of teaching, I was just teaching the mat while I was going through a comprehensive training, and also, you know, I became a teacher at the recession, so, like, a lot of people were always talking about how they didn't have enough clients and not enough money, and I had this like safe job, right? Like, just a laugh, it's retail, but I had this like safe job, and my commissions were going down, like I could see the writing was on the wall, even when I moved to LA the year before, Orange County was hitting, getting hit sooner, but I did live in LA, and I did have student loans, and so I definitely thought, well, I love my job, I'll do this, and I'll teach Pilates, and so I kind of just was like, I could do this, so I'm just adding to who I am, like such the overachiever. Lesley Logan 7:52  Somewhere, though, in 2009, here, there were definitely some shifts. If I think back about who she was and what she was going through, there were shifts. And, you know, I don't think, I think it's okay to not really notice the shifts. In fact, it depends on how old you are listening to this, if you're on the younger side, you're not going to have that intuition we talked about in previous podcasts, because you haven't had experiences yet. So, for sure, I mean, in 2009, how old was I? '83, 2009, right? Someone can do the math. So just the life experience, I hadn't really outgrown a lot, because I maybe outgrew high school and outgrew college, but I hadn't really outgrown, here I was, doing this big girl, feeling like a badass boss babe, running things, and I didn't even know what a recession could do. So I definitely couldn't see the signs that things were shifting, that I was wanting more, that I was wanting something different. Now I can, because I've done reflections on all these different things, I can see the signs. Lesley Logan 8:57  But at any rate, I don't even know, also, that I was too aware. I think sometimes when you're younger, you're thinking you'll live forever, and so you're not necessarily aware that I'm not liking this anymore. Because you just keep going and you keep doing, and also, when you have the job that I had, people were envious of that job, and so it's really hard to go, "Oh, I don't want this," because also I had people telling me how crazy and amazing it was that I had it. So I can see the signs now that it was time to make a change, and that there was a desire, and I was no longer fitting into the life I was wearing or living. I now really understand that when I have resentment, there's something that needs to be changed. And so I do remember, at that '09 time, that I was resentful of the job that I would go to full-time in retail when a client wanted an extra session that week but I was working. And I remember getting frustrated that I could only teach for three hours and I had to go to my other job, or I had to drive in traffic to go teach, and wouldn't it have been nice if I could have just not had to deal with this traffic? I was already there teaching, so I just remember being a little frustrated about that, and I just started to feel like the store was holding me back from making more money, which is funny, because I was keeping the store job to have more money. But I remember going, "Okay, I think what I really need to do is do less hours at the store and more hours teaching." So this is how I was outgrowing this retail girl, but I wasn't brave enough to cut the ties. Lesley Logan 10:31  So after having that resentful stuff and getting frustrated and thinking about it, I came to this new conclusion that I should just shift the hours from one to the other. So I told the owners of the store that I was managing that I wanted to step down to basically a part-time manager, which is a key holder, and then I would be able to have extra days teaching and still have some days off. And they agreed, and ta-da, and I was training up the next manager, and then, two weeks-ish before everything was set to switch over, the owner said, "I have to let go of the other part-time girl." And I was like, "What?" And they're like, "Yeah, we don't need two part-time girls, because we'll have a manager and we'll have this person, and then you, so we don't need this as an extra person." And I remember thinking, "Oh, I didn't think about that." Here I thought, the store is going to benefit because I'll be working these three days a week, so my clients can come on these three days. When you worked in retail back then, people had a salesperson, so they'll still make their money, I'll make my commission, and so that's a win for them, because they felt like family at the time. So I definitely didn't want to screw them over in the outgrowing of myself that I was doing. And, by the way, that's a habit, a bad habit, I would say, there's no bad habits, I mean, but a habit, an unbecoming habit that I have is making sure that the changes I'm making, because I need to, and my life is going a different direction, don't always negatively affect them, and I'm trying to solve that for them, versus they should solve it for themselves. In that conversation, I realized they weren't letting me do what I was doing, but it wasn't going to be because they're going to keep everybody in their business, and it was during the recession, so they weren't gonna let her go. And I was like, "Oh, because I've known her, I hired her, I trained her, she was really great, I know she needed the money." I went home and thought about it, and I was just not okay with keeping this job and her getting fired, because as I thought about it, I was like, well, what happens when I do have enough clients that I could leave, right? Then they're going to be short someone, and then I'm really screwing them over, because they fired this great girl, and on top of that, she got screwed over because she doesn't have a job in retail during this time. So I kind of feel mad, but it was the kind of the slap-in-the-face wake-up call that I needed to just quit so she could keep her job. Lesley Logan 12:53  And it was somewhere in the middle of figuring that out that I realized that I could make a living teaching, and I didn't want to be in between. I wanted to go all in, and I think that's an important part. When you are outgrowing a version of yourself, there is this tendency to try to do both, be both people, keep the friends of the old life while you're in the new life, keep the clothes of the old life when you're in the new life, keep the schedule of the old life when you're going to the new life, because we don't want to let things go. We don't want to lose things; there's nostalgia for that. It feels safe, it feels comfortable, even though it's uncomfortable, right? It feels careful and doesn't have as much fear. So anyways, time goes on, right? I end up managing a store, a studio, excuse me, for the high-end fitness company that I switched my life over to. They heard about my management experience, they saw the great teacher that I was as a baby instructor, but the potential that I had, and I kept climbing the ranks, much like I did in retail, kept getting promoted, kept getting promoted. And I just felt like a big fish in a small pond. I got lots of accolades, and people at the top of the company knew who I was, similar to my last job. So I had grown to this new identity, but in doing all of that, I'd written a book called Profitable Pilates: Everything But the Exercises, and people were reading it, and they're wanting coaching calls, and I had a studio where I was renting space where I could make a little bit extra cash, and then I had retreats. So here we are, you know, this is now around the 2015 time. My book had been out for a while, started business coaching, and I had really grown as high up as I could at the time with the skill sets that I had for this company, and I was feeling the same resentment; it came back. So here I come to this new version of myself, Pilates teacher, and then Pilates teacher trainer, and then Pilates studio manager, and then Pilates regional manager, and Pilates business coach, and Pilates studio renter. And I could tell that I was outgrowing this again. I was outgrowing myself again. I could feel the repetitive resentments, the frustrations, the overwhelm, and I was getting exhausted because I wanted to be coaching more people in their business, but I had to run nine other businesses and this teacher training program. Lesley Logan 15:17  And so I think what's interesting is that even though the signs were the same, that I was outgrowing a version of myself, it doesn't mean that I fell into the last version of myself. I definitely became the Pilates instructor and the studio owner, all those things. But as she grew and she got more information, she was figuring out who she was, and I hate talking in the third person like that, so sorry I'm doing that, but as she was doing those things, she got more clear on what she wanted and what she no longer needed. And I think that's really important when you start outgrowing yourself; there's some things that you're doing because you always have done them, but you don't need them anymore, you know? And so I, while I took all these promotions, part of it was because I wanted the salary, because I wanted certainty still, and I wanted the health insurance, but I'd gotten to a place where I was understanding the business enough to truly understand that I didn't need those safety nets anymore, that I could make them myself, and so I just outgrown that person in me, too. What's interesting is in 2015, I did things a little bit different. I didn't do the, "Hey, I'm going to do this and I'll be here for that." No, I sat down and did some math with my husband, then he was my fiancé, we figured out what steps I needed to take in my own personal business so that I could let go of something, and we made it data over vibes. I think that's really important, because as we outgrow versions of ourselves, sometimes we are going off of vibes and trying to make reasons about how things we feel, and you know what, we got to get out of our head and get into the stats and just write down the evidence. What is real? What is really happening? Where am I going with this? How is this going to happen? And so I went from being this person who wanted to help everybody and support the mentor that I had, and be on this big team, and be a team player, and truly watch this company continue to grow and make a big impact in their space, to going, "I want to make my own impact. I want to be a bigger deal." And so it was scary to want to be a fish in a bigger pond, and I definitely worried, "Oh my gosh, does anyone know who I am when I do this?" But I did it. I got rid of the management gig in 2015, and I did stay on for a little bit for the teacher training because I actually really enjoyed it, but I will say in 2016, that resentment was starting to grow again, and I was like, "Oh, here it is." And I started just quitting things, just quitting this and quitting that. I quit my retail, quit my, as a head of commercial agent, I had a modeling agent, I was like, "I'm quitting that, I'm quitting this." I was shedding, because I was like, "To go into the next thing that I'm doing, I can't have any distractions." And so that was really different. Lesley Logan 18:04  So, instead of going from being an employee in retail to being an employee in Pilates, I'm now going into being my actual own business owner. And to be that version of myself, I have to really lean into the things that I want to do and let go of all the other things. And here's the thing, it is one thing to realize you've outgrown a version of yourself, and it's another entirely different thing to let her go, because it's emotional, right? Like, who knows? Mine were only like five and seven-year stints, but sometimes these are 20-year stints. Sometimes you were married for a long time, and now you're divorced, and so now you're in a new version of yourself there. I'm sharing work, outgrowing versions of myself, but you can outgrow all you can. You can be forced to outgrow different things because situations changed, and you can make those decisions yourself, but either way, we're all gonna go through it. And the hardest part is letting that go without making a version of yourself wrong, or having shame, or thinking, "I should have done it sooner." I definitely played that game. I'm like, "Oh my god, I should have just quit sooner. I should not have taken that promotion." When you reflect back, you can start to see how the signs were there that you've outgrown what you're doing, and honestly, you're just grieving, and grief has all those stages, right? You have the anger and the sadness and all the things, right? So I think it's really important to feel those emotions and to feel the discomfort and to go through the grief, because if you don't let those things go, then you're just going to try to take them into the next version of yourself, and that's not going to work. And we'll talk more about that on Thursday, and then also it leads to being stuck, which is a series we're going to do in a couple of weeks. So anyways, I hope that just sharing some of my stories of different versions of myself help you think about that, because I think what could be really important is you reflect back on your life and the different versions you've had, right? You've had. I used to really feel like I needed affirmations from other people that I was on the right path, and I think it was around 2020, when we were all forced to be in different places, that I was like, "I do not need affirmations from other people. I'm on the right path," because everyone thought I was so crazy that Brad and I were moving to Vegas, buying houses, they thought we were nuts, out of our mind. Best decision we ever made. Everyone's so like, "Oh my god, thank God you did that. Can you believe you did that? What a great timing that was." Yeah, I can believe it, because I didn't listen to other people.Lesley Logan 20:43  So, there's these different versions of ourselves. These versions of ourselves require certainty over our uncertainty, or other people's opinions versus listening to our own gut. And I think the beautiful thing is, the older that we get, and this is why I do think it's fun and beautiful to get older, is that you know yourself so well, it's actually easier for you to go, oh, that's not me anymore, I'm not doing that anymore, right? I don't wear that anymore. Those are not the right clothes. You know, I was looking at my closet, there was a dress I haven't let go of because it's a Betsey Johnson. It was one of the first designer clothes I bought, and I actually do think this dress is so beautiful, and Betsey Johnson is popular again. This dress should just actually be in a museum, it's so beautiful, because when I go to put it on, I'm like, this doesn't look like anything I would wear. And so, sometimes we don't realize that we've changed until we put on an outfit that we've worn, and we're like, this isn't me at all, right? So, anyways, take some time to think about and reflect on how you've outgrown different things, and then I would also say, take some time to reflect: do you like how you did it, knowing what you know now? What would you do differently? Have you outgrown a version of yourself, but you didn't fully let her go, like you're trying to hold on? All these things are really good questions to ask yourself, because it will help us in our next episode. Lesley Logan 22:02  So, until then, my loves, please share this with a friend who needs to hear it. I really want to grow this podcast. I want to help more and more people. If you like these series topics, send in the topic you'd like us to discuss for two, four, even six episodes. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 22:18  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 23:01  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 23:06  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 23:10  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 23:17  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 23:21  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this last FYF of the month, Lesley Logan opens with a Lucille Ball reminder that loving yourself first is what makes everything else fall into line. She celebrates wins from Amanda LG, including a Friday the 13th flash tattoo and a client whose mental health is being saved by her classes, before sharing her own win. It's a grounded, joyful reminder that self-love and prioritized time with the people you love create a ripple effect on everyone around you. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:A Lucille Ball quote on why loving yourself first matters most.A listener wins on adult stickers, joy, and Friday the 13th tattoos.How one Pilates teacher is saving her client's mental health.Lesley's road trip with her bestie from Vegas to Florida.Episode References/Links:Amanda LG - https://www.instagram.com/amandalgpilatesSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:47  Hello. Be It babe. How are you? Oh my gosh. Welcome to the last FYF. We had a fifth FYF. This may how I mean, so it's kind of fun when there's five, because we get to celebrate you for an extra you get an extra chance to find another reason to celebrate a win in a month, right? Like you had five Fridays five times to find someone to celebrate. I hope you're doing this every single day. But honestly, if you just do it on Fridays, that's going to be great. Did you listen to last week? It was talking about how to build confidence. It was so good. Okay, so something inspirational, your win, my win, and a mantra that's it. We're just gonna keep it tight. Keep it quick. Here it is. Lucille Ball. Love yourself first, and everything falls into line. You really have to love yourself first to get anything done in this world. You really do. You really do. Especially with everything that's going on, you have to love yourself first. It matters. It changes the way people love themselves around you. It's a bubble of influence. Lesley Logan 1:42  Okay, your win. This one. We have two from @amandalgpilates. So I got a Friday the 13th flash tattoo because adults need stickers and they make me happy. Well, I too, have some adult stickers, and I agree. I love them. I got a few flash tattoos as well from the last Friday the 13th. And I love them very much. They're called little freckles, like I'm in brown ink. So they actually like because if I was born with a star freckle and a heart and then you also sent in, one of my clients told me that coming to my classes has been saving her mental health. Whoa. Huge, huge, huge. That's a huge win, right? Huge win. Look at the effort like look at how you're changing her life. Whatever you're doing is making them want to keep coming, keep coming when they've got so much going on. I love that so much. Lesley Logan 2:30  Okay, my win is, okay. So here's the deal. My bestie and I are on a road trip from Las Vegas to Hollywood, Florida, by ourselves. So I don't have Brad driving. I had to drive. She has to drive. We're doing it together. It's really exciting because, like, we've always wanted to go on a vacation together, and we're like, let's go. Where should we go? What should we do? And honestly, like, this is quite cool, even though I'm doing tons of road trips. I've done this route-ish before, and I'm doing something similar in August. Like to do it with her means, like, one, I'm not teaching. Two, we get to just like, enjoy ourselves and have a great time and and have time away from the rest of the world. And like, you know, usually when we hang out together, our husbands are there too. And, like, they often go off and do their own thing. But like, just nice seven days, just the two of us. I'm super stoked. I'm super excited. I and you're hearing this while I'm on it. And so anyways, we're probably in New Orleans right now, and then I actually get to spend a couple days in New Orleans, and instead of just like a meal, I could do like five meals. So I'm super excited about that. So just why is this a win? Because two really busy people planned time and money away from their lives and their family and their routines to be together, and that's a win. You can do it too. You don't have to do a road trip with your bestie, but do the thing that you and your bestie said you're gonna do, and then send it in to the beitpod.com/questions so we can celebrate your wins, because you are amazing. You're doing great work, taking care of yourself, prioritizing yourself, loving yourself first, is like the thing, the secret to life. So thank you. Be it, babe. Lesley Logan 3:59  Here is your mantra, although we could just have Lucille Ball's be a mantra. I fully embrace all parts of me. I fully embrace all parts of me. You fully embrace all parts of you, Be It babe. Yes, you do. All right, go Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 4:16  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 4:58  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 5:03  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 5:08  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 5:15  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 5:18  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this recap episode, Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell break down the transformative conversation with Inna Segal, the bestselling author of The Secret Language of Your Body and a pioneer in the field of energy medicine and human consciousness. Together they explore why perfection stifles creation, how the gut operates as our emotional center, and what it actually takes to build and uphold healthy boundaries with the people closest to us. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Why perfection is the enemy of creation and refinement leads to growth.How the gut assimilates daily experiences as our emotional center.What healthy boundaries require: confidence, clarity, and consistent enforcement.The difference between what happened to you and your healing.How creating time to self-reflect helps you discover what you stand for.Episode References/Links:Amnesty International – https://www.amnesty.orgThe Observer – https://www.theguardian.com/observereLevate Mentorship Program – https://lesleylogan.co/elevateOPC Summer Tour – https://opc.me/tourOPC Pilates Flashcards – https://opc.me/flashcardsOPC YouTube – https://opc.me/ytNevada SPCA – https://nevadaspca.orgRSPCA – https://www.rspca.org.ukInna Segal's Website & Free Resources - https://www.innasegal.comThe Secret Language of Your Body by Inna Segal – https://a.co/d/0fL3MSwgThe Holistic Psychologist – https://theholisticpsychologist.comEp. 183 with Dr. Kelly Bender - https://beitpod.com/ep183Submit your wins or questions – https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Inna Segal 0:00  I'd always relied on somebody else to do all the healing work, and I never actually did any thing myself, because I didn't think I was qualified to do it. I think that I knew how to do it, except that it was my body, and it's your body, when you're that you're dealing with. So nobody knows as much about you as you know about yourself.Lesley Logan 0:23  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:05  Okay, Be It babe, we've talked we've we've had people talk about boundaries. We've had people talk about listening to your body. We've had people talk about getting to know yourself. And now I have your guest expert who is able to actually explain how to do all these things, explain how to actually listen to your body, explain how you can heal yourself. And really, we had a really great conversation about what it really looks like. And I mean, she was just describing being it till you see it in such a beautiful way, without saying it. And I just, I'm so excited that you're about to listen to this episode, because I just finished doing it, and I am pleased as punch. And I feel like I learned so much and or and even things that I think I knew were more solidified, and I have more confidence in that. And I just, I'm excited for you. So here's Inna Segal. Lesley Logan 1:52  All right, be it, babe, I'm ready to have this conversation. I got to talk with our guest today before the end of last year, and I was so excited about all the knowledge she has in the area that we're going to dive into. Also, she's a best selling author, and I think it's really important to bring that up. She is the author of The Secret Language of Your Body, and, you know, as a Pilates instructor and someone who's really big on mind-body connection, I couldn't agree more with someone having access and information on how we can get to know and talk with our bodies in such a better way, I think the world will be a better place if we all could do that. So Inna Segal, if you can tell everyone who you are and what you rock at.Inna Segal 2:28  Thank you, Lesley. So I teach people how to connect to their body and listen to their body, but I'm going to also add the soul and really work with it to transform their health, to transform their emotions, to essentially transform any area of their life which is stuck a block into something that is much more wise, flowing and deep. And so they get to know themselves in a deeper, more enriched kind of way. So it's not a surface-based experience, it's a deep dive experience.Lesley Logan 3:07  I know and that's the hard one. The surface is, I think, easy and necessary to, you know, wake up and go to bed and do some stuff in between, but getting to know ourselves on a soul level. I mean, that is, it feels like it shouldn't be tricky, but for whatever reason, it feels like it's the hardest thing for people to do.Inna Segal 3:29  I think it's the hardest thing just because we are not taught from an earlier age that we should listen to our inner self, and that's through our sensations, through our emotions, through what's really going on within ourselves, but we're actually taught to ignore everything and adjust ourselves to everybody else in the world, and so because of that, I feel that it became hard thing, instead of natural, and part of everybody's life is to go my body is essentially showing me if I'm in alignment with my life, with my purpose, with my relationships, with every part of my life, with my health, or it's not, you know, and if it's not, what is it that I need to change and adjust so that it can be?Lesley Logan 4:27  Yeah, yeah. I mean, oh my gosh, you said so much there that I couldn't agree more with. I think we're all taught from a very early age, you know, to not listen to our feelings even as babies, you know, babies are crying and people are like, it's okay, you're okay, and it's like, well, they're crying, you know? And I get, I get why. And by the way, we have a lot of moms listen, I get why. I probably too be like, you're fine, stop crying. But also like, you know, at what point are we teaching our, teaching them at such a young age to not listen to how they feel, or for us to not listen to how they feel, or how we feel so, so I find maybe our bodies are their own language, like we, we grow up learning English, but our bodies are speaking Spanish, and we were never taught to listen to that language. But maybe I'm simplifying a little bit. Inna, can you I would just want to know before we get too deep into this. Like, were you born knowing all this? Did your parents teach you this? Did you come from a mother who made sure you knew how to talk to your get to know your soul and your purpose or how did you get here?Inna Segal 5:28  Well, my mom was actually she's very open-minded as a person, but she was very much when I was growing up. She was very much into the medical world, and she thought the word of the doctor was kind of the Word of God, essentially. So I went to a lot of doctors when I was younger. I had digestive issues, I had psoriasis, I had really bad back pain, sciatica, inflammation in my back, a twisted back, and I had anxiety just from constantly being uncomfortable inside my body and being in pain. And essentially, I want to say my turning point came when I ended up seeing this chiropractor that I'd seen for a while, and he came out of his office looked at me and said, Your body's stuck. And I said, yeah, I know that part. What are you going to do to help me? And I've been seeing him for a while, so this was not my first session with him.Lesley Logan 6:28  That's good. He's not like, look like, you're stuck.Inna Segal 6:32  Yeah, you know, we'd known each other for some time, and he so he's basically, he basically said, you know, your your body wants to be stuck at this point go home, and I didn't take very well to that. On the way home, I was pretty angry, but because I actually come from a background of professional writing and journalism and editing, I was and I was studying that at the time, I was thinking exactly like you were saying before, from that linguistic perspective that I'm stuck my body's speaking to me. I don't know what it's saying, because it might as well be speaking. I felt like it was more Chinese or Japanese, because I literally I can't even recognize the letters, but what I was aware of is that I'd been going to see somebody for about it was two years solid, between three and five days a week, And I would have, you know, times, maybe a week to maximum month, where I felt better and I could forget about everything and just do whatever I needed to do in my life. But then I would have this crash, and all the pain would intensify and explode, and I would feel like it would get worse rather than better. And so what occurred to me on this drive home was that I'd always relied on somebody else to do all the healing work, and I never actually did any thing myself, because I didn't think I was qualified to do it. I think that I knew how to do it, except that it was my body, and it's your body to when you're that you're dealing with. So nobody knows as much about you as you know about yourself. And so when I went home, I made a decision, I'm going to heal myself. And I essentially just did the most basic things. I placed my hands on my back. I was breathing into my back because I realized that I was holding my breath. And you know, if you hold your breath, you are stuck. And I know you probably know about this more than most of us, Lesley, from teaching Pilates, and you know, and connecting to your body in that way. And so as I was doing that, and counting backwards from 30, it occurred to me to ask for something higher in terms of help. Because I thought, why not? Why? You know, at this point, I mean, there was conflict in me around, you know, whether I believed in it fully or not. And I say this because most people go, well, you have to believe. I didn't believe in anything. I'm one of the most skeptical people you're going to meet when it comes to things, you know, where I need proof for things.Lesley Logan 9:30  Right, right.Inna Segal 9:31  And so, you know, I have a very scientific, skeptical mind, and I ask, because I just essentially felt like, Why? Why wouldn't I? Why not ask for help? At this point, I had zero expectations, but this warmth just moved through my body, and as my eyes were closed, I saw this golden light, and then I said, for whatever reason, or I thought, I thought, I wonder what my back would look like if I could see it, and without any expectation, within a few moments, I felt like somebody switched the light on and I could see my back. And although I was a bit shocked, I thought to myself, okay, this is kind of my (inaudible) to Japanese. Show me. Show me why I have this. What is the real reason that I have this? And the best way to describe this is as in having a memory meets a vision meets wisdom, right? So it was kind of like there were several, I am very visual. I didn't know that I was until that moment, but I am and visually, I could connect back to memories of things that happened. But not everything was a memory. Some of it was more of an insight, vision, understanding, kind of wisdom, what happened. And so I saw I was born in Eastern Europe, I saw myself coming to Australia and going to school and being bullied, and from there, developing psoriasis all over my skin. I saw the conflicts that my parents had in terms of trying to adjust to a new culture going to high school and not necessarily being bullied for not being able to speak the language, but being bullied for not being one of us, so to say, not being because it was a private school, not being someone who came from a super wealthy family, not belonging to the same club, and all of that affecting me from the perspective of, I don't feel myself, I don't feel supported, I don't feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't want to be here and.Lesley Logan 11:57  I get all of that. I get all of that all and I think so many people are probably nodding along, we don't realize how it doesn't have to be so bad that we would be on news show or be a documentary about you, but those little things that make you feel unsafe and or you don't belong, it means that your body becomes this foreign thing you you no one know. Not only do you not know how to read Japanese to talk to your body, but it just you know, if you can't belong in your own body, it's really hard to feel like you belong anywhere. And if you don't feel like you belong anywhere, it's hard to know what belonging in your body is. You don't know what what that feels like.Inna Segal 12:41  Well, exactly, and the last part of this was an understanding of ancestry meets my own, I guess, challenge everything interestingly was coming up around this communication challenge, right? So not being able to speak and be myself, not being able to speak English, not being able to speak the language, and I don't mean, you know, when I, when I got older, the language that people are speaking about. Oh look, this is my label. This is what I bought here, and so on. Lesley Logan 13:18  Oh, yeah. Inna Segal 13:18  So there was an interesting aspect of that. And then there was this ancestral trauma that was connected to my digestive system that took a long, long time to work on. And it was to do with my grandmother losing a lot of people in her family. And then when I was 19, I got pregnant. It was very hard for me to adjust to that idea that I was going to become a mother at that age. Out of all my friends, I would have been, you know, the one they thought would either have kids the latest, or maybe not even have them. So the fact that I was the first, and everyone went, oh my god, wow, okay, was pretty intense. And then, when, then I just had this sense that something was off, probably about a month or three weeks before the baby was born and when, but I was told by the midwives that I was crazy, that nothing was happening. And this is, again, how medical professionals often kind of push aside anything intuitive that shows up, and essentially, the baby died pretty much 38 weeks.Lesley Logan 14:31  Oh, I'm so sorry.Inna Segal 14:34  Yeah. So it was so I was in trauma. I didn't want to leave. I was, you know, I just want people to understand I was at rock bottom, even wanting to be here, and I was 20. In my mind, whilst I don't, I can't say 100% I was told that the baby would have died two or three days before, which was actually my birthday, where I turned 20. So it was, you know, so I kind of connected it to my. Birthday and all of this stuff and that I didn't want to be here, and what's the point of everything in life, and this, this whole experience of connecting to my body, was pretty profound. So I really saw how my grandmother and her loss, she lost her mother, and she she was part of a family of eight, and everybody died, except her and her father, who survived for a few years after the war, and she never really grieved it or worked through it in any way or form, because people didn't at that time, and everybody had digestive issues in my family, and so I could see how the explosion occurred. Especially, I had issues before, but after I had the baby, it was just, you know, I, my digestive system just wasn't working well, and during that experience, I cried a lot. I understood a lot of things. I also realized that I was a sponger. I was one of those people that just took on everybody's pain in general, as well as it all. And after all of these insights, I fell asleep, and then the next day, when I wake up, about 70% of the pain was gone from my back, and I felt different. There was something different inside of me where I went, oh my god, my body's working with me. I can help I can work with it. It's because I made this step towards it that it's coming towards me, even though I'm still super skeptical that, you know, this is not just something that's not going to return. And so, you know, over the next few weeks, I just journaled a lot, I asked a lot of questions, I connected, and by the end of it, all the psoriasis was gone. So that was the first thing that went that was and again, lots of people, my family, have it and have had it their whole lives. So it wasn't, and I'd had it for by that stage, for 10 years. So it wasn't like, oh, you know, I had this.Lesley Logan 17:10  Mis-diagnosis of some kind. Inna Segal 17:11  Yeah, yeah, exactly. And then, you know, I noticed, yeah, my back pain disappeared. My anxiety went down. Digestive Issues took years and years to work on. Lesley Logan 17:26  They do. But also with that generational and ancestral trauma, it just takes a while, because the gut just takes a while to, like, rebuild and do all that stuff and figure out what you need. Sorry, I cut you off. But yes, I actually it feels better that it didn't happen overnight, because that would feel weird.Inna Segal 17:47  Well, yeah, exactly. And that's what people need to understand, is that, especially when it comes connects, like, well, what's the gut about? It's about digesting life as well as food, right? It's assimilating, every day we have experiences, this is our emotional center, one of them, and we always talk about our what's your gut saying? Right? So we already know we have it in our language. So we have our intuition, we have our emotions here. We have knowingness here. But it's also all about how we, our relationships. It's an area that processes what happened during the day, your relationships, your experiences how something happened in your life, and what you believe you're capable of doing. It's kind of where your sense of self lives, and many of us need to clarify what that even means and rebuild it, because a sense of self has been beaten down over the years through all sorts of things in our you know, family and even at work, relationships for sure, and so this is something that is daily, right? It's a daily experience where you go, you know, how did I, how did I go today? Did I push down and push away and just keep going, or did I face things?Lesley Logan 19:20  Yeah, I think that's a great, first of all, I love that you ask yourself questions. And I think that that's where a lot of people, well, I think a lot of people get stuck on what am I asking? But also do I ask myself how am I doing? Yes, that's a great place to start. But I do think a lot of people, you know, it's, it's okay if you're one day, like, I can't do it today. I just have to go through. Okay, one day. But where I think happens is that people keep going the next day into the next day. We procrat, we keep putting off the prioritization of ourself. And that's where it builds up on top of the ancestral stuff. So it's we have our own stuff, and then there's the stuff. So I guess I have, I don't want to forget to talk about boundaries, because I know you've clearly had to figure out how to do that since you are so, since you were a sponge before, and obviously we're probably not now, since you figured this out. But for the people who I've heard of, ancestral stuff, like it comes through, how do people know what's theirs and what's ancestral, and then how do you cut the ties of that? Because is it visually cutting the ties? Is it telling your family that's your stuff? How do you do that?Inna Segal 20:31  Well, it's, I don't know about visually cutting it. I'm not gonna be a fan of cutting things in general. I think I'm more into clearing or being very clear in things that I feel in terms of, again, boundaries, it often takes a long time for you to gain your confidence first, to become aware of what is a healthy boundary, right? So you have to even come to that place of, what does it mean and who with, right? Because it's completely different with different people. So I can be incredibly good with having healthy boundaries, let's say with my students or with my clients, but not necessarily with family. And I'm saying it as an example, right? It's easier with people who are not close with you. The hardest thing is with those who are because you don't want to hurt them and you don't want to be harsh. And so from my perspective, I've done all sorts of things with boundaries. I've spent, you know, countless hours at different times in my life writing them down again. I write to get clarity, and I actually encourage everyone to do that in terms of boundaries, because what does it mean to you? You know, is it self respect? Is it self love? Is it space that you need? What boundary are you actually looking at? Is it actually you know, I know so many people that are single and don't have healthy boundaries with people that they have dated or been in relationships before with, or they keep going and then they wonder why they can't find the part, you know, the partner that they want, and all sorts of things. So there's many, many different boundaries that you need to look at. I think the hardest are definitely when it comes to your parents, children and partner. You know, I really think it's also how you present it and then sticking to it. So for instance, with my children, it's also changed over time. So there were times when they were younger, where it was like, well, you have to knock on the door. That's my boundary. Can't just barge in. So if you barge in, you go back, you know, and you knock on the door, that's a boundary, right? And they had to write down their boundaries as well when they were younger, when they were kind of teenagers, and so on. And then it became, well, you know, with my son, for instance, he would go into this place of overwhelm, and then he would bombard me with negative messages in the middle of the night. And so even if I turned my phone off, which was part of my you know.Lesley Logan 23:15  Yeah, you wake up to a crappy day.Inna Segal 23:19  Exactly. And so I said I had to clarify this to him over and over and over again. You can't do this. If you do this, I'm going to, I'm actually not going to speak to you for a while. I mean, unless you're asking me for help, don't, don't send me this, unless you're willing to do what I'm what I'm going to say, so we had a lot of kind of like, here's a boundary. Here's a boundary. Here's a boundary. With my mom, she used to call me, and the first thing that she would say would be some kind of complaint, and I'd be like, as she called, I wouldn't pick up the phone half the time. And she would go, you know, you don't pick up the phone. And I was like, well, let's think about why I don't pick up the phone. You know, what do you usually say when you call me? You know, do you say something positive? Is it something encouraging, or do you kind of attack and say all these things to me? And so again, we had to have a break for several months from talking to each other, because I was like, you can't do that. And then we had a break another time, because she learned her lesson where, you know, and I would say, I will hang up if you start being negative and telling me all this stuff, I'm not your therapist. I'm your daughter. So, you know, we need to change our game and the roles that we're playing, because this, I cannot grow the way that you're you're doing this. And also, I don't want to be in, you know, like you are with my children. So I need a completely different overhaul of mothering, you know, so that I can be the mother that I think they need. There's so many different ways, and I think luckily for me, everybody in the family eventually, because they kind of got the message in terms of what the boundaries are. But it takes time, and it takes a lot of effort.Lesley Logan 25:24  Well, I appreciate you, one, giving all those examples, because I have asked other people this question, and I don't get nearly the detail. I get be patient, but also be clear. And it's right? I thank you for the you know, the same thing I could read on a blog. What I appreciate is like, you explain how your how the boundaries, healthy boundaries evolve over time, based on the person and based on your needs. And also that it is, it is hard. You have to keep enforcing that boundary until you know it's an actual boundary that they see and you can and it can be appreciated. And also that means that they could have boundaries too. And I think that's where a lot of people who struggle when people put boundaries up, is that they don't realize that they too can also have a boundary they too can go reflect on. So I think what a great example you are. So thank you for diving into that. So I do, I do want, before I forget. I do want to go into that ancestral stuff. Because, first of all, I can only imagine what your grandmother went through. But I do, I do know that, most of us, no matter where you live in the world, if you're over 40, you have grandparents or great grandparents who were in these were World Wars. So there was, there was a lot of loss. And you know, I know my father was in a war that was not appreciated and liked, and in hindsight, was a terrible thing, and so not treated the same as people who were in one of the world wars when they came back home. And so I think all these things depend. So how do you how did you discover what was ancestral with your grandmother versus, oh, this stuff, this over here is my stuff. How did you kind of figure that out?Inna Segal 27:04  Well, I started looking at everybody in the family, actually, and I started asking questions, which were, was I born with this? I mean, in other words, did I bring this with me into this life? Is it does it feel like completely mine, or does it feel like I've brought it? I'm picking it up, I'm carrying this, and if I am, then am I doing it unconsciously in the same exact way that my grandmother, or great grandmother, whoever else did, or my mom? Or am I doing this differently? So I was closely looking at it, and one of the biggest things that we do take on, and that I was watching myself, you know, absorb, let's just say, was constant worry, right? Constant worry, because that was something my grandmother did. My grandfather did it. They had digestive issues, they had surgeries, they had cancers. My mom had it, and I was like, what are they doing that I don't want to get the same health issue? Let's break that down. So to actually, because the biggest thing in my family is intestinal cancers, I was like, okay, let's look that up. Well, in my book that I write, let's look at that right, and let's go, what causes this? And if I don't want to get this, I need to act in a very, very different way, meaning internally, not just on the external which means I need to go rather than just sitting in that state of tension and worry, it's like, what can I do to transform that worry? You know, what can I what do I need to work on in terms of that? So, how do I change that when this shows up? What am I worrying about? And actually, my daughter asked me the other day. She goes, Mom, what do you do when, you know, when things happen to her, mainly to my son. And you know that's different, because she was asking me about this ancestral stuff, and I said to her, well, actually, I start to think I know so many processes, right? I teach them, I write about them. So I immediately get my journal out. I write down what's going on for me, and then I look at what are the processes that are available to me that can help me and him? And it could be as simple as I am focused on buying into whatever he's telling me, which is negative and he obviously wants me to feel as bad as I possibly can feel because that's his pattern that he's learned from, you know, his dad and other people in the family. So what if I don't buy that, and I actually keep seeing him being healthier and being stronger and being, you know, different and so at different times. I mean, not different who he is, but being aware of where he's at. And you know what I found is that it's not immediately that the change happens when you hold something different for, let's say, your your child, but eventually they have. It's like they have something different to adjust to than that ancestral line that you've worked on yourself, and that's how you change things for your family.Lesley Logan 30:50  Inna, that is freaking amazing. It's like, I'm obsessed with this, because it's instead of me turning on the emotion that they're trying to get me to have, I'm visualizing the person that I wish they could be in that moment. I can stay good, and their stuff stays their stuff, and it's not going to solve it in today's conversation or tomorrow's conversation or whatever. But I'm not taking it on either, because it's not mine. I love this so much. Oh my god. I mean, I could keep talking about this with you, but I do want to pick your brain about something that we talked about that made me so excited. You have a whole thing you talk about archetypes and with masculine and feminine. I just kind of wanted to get into that, because I think it's really easy for, you know, with Instagram, to say, like, oh, you got to be in your feminine. And it's like, well, yeah, and I run my own business, so, you know, sometimes I have to talk about taxes, sometimes just got to do it. So I kind of wanted to hear your take, because I'm I also am someone who's, like had gut issues, and I've had a lot of people who listen, who have that, and I'm like, how do I stay not taking it all in, but also, being in this world, this world is a lot going on.Inna Segal 32:02  Yeah, absolutely, when we're looking at archetypes, essentially, what we're looking at is emotion meets your belief systems and a perspective, a particular way of seeing life, meets your life story. So what's actually occurred to you specifically, and also it connects to your ancestry, what you've picked up and you're playing out that you're not necessarily aware of. So let's say we are looking at feminine and masculine as archetypes. So if I'm looking in the feminine archetype, and I feel hardly anyone talks about this, I need to, actually, to understand my own feminine I need to understand my feminine line. I need to understand, well, what was the feminine in terms of my grandmother, let's say, how did she express that? And is that in alignment with what I feel feminine is at this point, so was she warm, kind, loving, expressive, or was she cold, disconnected in herself? What was the example of feminine from, let's say, my grandmother or my auntie or my mom, ideally, all of these people, because that became my idea of what feminine is. Now around the age of 14 to let's say 16, we are as we're growing in that teenage age, which is also an archetype where we're looking at our family, female and females and males, and we're going, who would I like to be like? Who is showing me something that is more appealing to me than the other person? So for a lot of us, especially of my generation, like you said, people in their 40s. You, you, you kind of had that more of a choice than the generations before that, where you looked at your mom and you looked at your dad and you went, I think I want to be more masculine because it looks more fun and I can and I want to, you know, for me, it was like, I want to be like, Madonna, look, if she can do it, I can do it. Lesley Logan 34:32  I wasn't allowed to have her on my wall, but I am so I feel like I missed out on an amazing chapter of life, if I could have had her as my mentor.Inna Segal 34:41  So, you know, and she was quite masculine, and since she went, I'm going to do whatever men do. I'm going to conquer the world, blah, blah, blah. So to me, it was that, and subconsciously, again, no one does this consciously. Subconsciously, I went, well, my mom, so. what feminine means for her. in terms of what I've seen, is cooking, cleaning, doing what you don't want to do, being subordinate to your partner. I'm not doing that. So I was like, I'd rather be masculine than feminine in that sense, again, not consciously, because my dad has freedom. He does whatever he wants to do. My mom does whatever my dad wants her to do, whatever she feels, she's constantly adjusting herself. And so I kind of went like this, you know, bull into the real, into my earlier relationships, going, oh no, it's my way, like I because I cannot be like what I've seen my mom be, which obviously then create a lot of conflict, and made me go, okay, so when I'm looking when somebody says, be feminine, and I'm looking at this, and it's still work, a work in progress, right? And I'm going, so what does it look like today to show up being feminine in terms of this person and that and I thought about it in so many different ways, and one of the easiest ways I've thought about it is through color. So it was like, okay, let's say I'm wearing pink today, so I'm going, pink is a soft color, quite feminine in that sense of expansion. It's it's a love color, but it's gentle. It's not that red passion, you know, and intensity. It's softer than green. Even the green is connected to the heart and healing the heart. So, I, you know, I might go, okay, so what does it look like to be pink and connect to my son, for instance, through that, you know, more of the gentleness let me, let me get to know myself in that feminine through that color. How do I breathe? How do I feel? How do I walk? How does my voice sound? Can I adjust my voice based on this color? Right? Because people get affected. And so it started to look at that. And I also think that when you're looking at again feminine or masculine, it's about role models. It was like, what what do I already have, and what am I missing? And so one of the things, because I grew up in, you know, both when I was very young, in Eastern Europe and then in Australia, most of the time now, in both of these places, gracefulness is not one of the things that you see in terms of women. But in France, you see that all the time. And so at one point, I was like, what am I missing? Oh, I'm missing this sense of grace that I find really attractive in terms of seeing in other women. And so where do I find this? And I was like, I need to, I need to look at old movies. I need to look at French women, not all of them, but. Lesley Logan 38:06  Yeah, no, Inna, this is so be it till you see it. This is the blueprint for how to be it till you see it. And I agree, oh my god, the French women, they know how to just like they exude luxury and grace.Inna Segal 38:20  Exactly. And just watching it and going, oh, okay, let me, let me embrace this. Let me practice this. Right? Because people think, oh, I am who I am, and I'm, I don't agree with that. It's like, you are a refinement, you know? And this is why I don't agree with this whole idea in the New Age movement of I'm already perfect. It's like, what? Why? What are you doing here? If you're already perfect, what's the point of this? Perfection, as my partner says this (inaudible) perfection is the enemy of creation. It's like, you're not perfect. You would not be here. This is not a holiday. You're here to evolve and grow. And, refine. You know, let's not even use the word perfect. Let's use the word refine. And, you know, grow in that sense. And it's the same with the masculine. What I find, for instance, is that people who find it very hard to be successful in the outside world have a very weakened masculine without any doubt, it's almost like that spine of the masculine is weakened inside of them, usually from childhood, usually from, you know, all sorts of belief systems and early failures and lack of direction and lack of support often from their family in terms of, rather than pushing somebody into direction, actually discovering the direction that and supporting them in the direction that is right for them. And so what ends up happening is that these people start having these very, very strong belief systems. But it shows up in their spine like literally shows up energetically in their spine, because lower back, for instance, is all about finances. And you know, how good are you at looking after and supporting your family? And I grew up with people who constantly thought about finances, so it was not a surprise when I figured it out I had back pain, and love back pain. So it's almost like, as you become aware of it, you actually have choice to do something about it. So with the masculine you can, you know, you can go, oh, I need to work on strengthening that archetype, that part of myself, but also my spine, and my ability to handle rejection, my ability to handle objections, my ability to to guide if it is my own business, let's just say my ability to make decisions, concentration, logic, so all of those are beautiful masculine qualities. But I need to, let's say, whether you're in a masculine or feminine body, feminine is creative. It's light, it's a bit chaotic, but it's, you know, it's flowing at the same time, it's colorful, it, you know that there is that divinity and spirituality magic that it has there, whereas the masculine is more about making it happen, taking something that's creative and amazing and putting it into practice.Lesley Logan 41:35  Well, and you can, I would love to hear, I want to make your own opinion for you, but it just sounds like we need both. We have to we all need both. And it sounds like understanding where we got our our vision of what those two things are and how we are using them in our body is going to either help us or it's or it might be what's harming us. And so the more we can take our time to discover who is. Where did I discover my feminine and where am I, where would I like it to be? And where did the masculine happen? And where would, where would I prefer it to be? And then working towards that. And I love that we are not perfect. There's no perfect. Just keep on evolving and refining and getting better and so but the Instagram world is like, oh, I have three friends who are like, I'm just gonna, live in my divine feminine I'm like, oh, okay. I mean, I think that's gonna be hard.Inna Segal 42:32  Well, actually, interestingly, quite a few years ago, when I was separating from my ex husband, I ended up meeting this friend of mine, and she was doing this whole divine feminine thing at the time. And I remember I would call her and I would say, we caught up three times a week at the time, which was amazing. And I'd call her and I'd go, oh, what have you been doing, you know, this week, besides the times we've, you know, caught up, and she'd go, I'm connecting to my feminine I'm just literally lying next to the pool, journaling, you know, getting the sun, having a swim, and that's all I'm doing, because I'm slowing down internally and and she would speak in this beautiful, kind of very slow way. And I remember thinking, it's like she's the complete opposite to me. I don't even know what that looks like, or what that means to just, you know, go, and this was happening over many months, where she just, you know, it was covered. She wasn't working, and she was, you know, she'd pick up her son and do some things in the evening from school, but most of the day was about this and and really embodying it. And I was well, firstly, I think it's amazing that she's doing it, but most of us do not have that luxury of just or a (inaudible). Lesley Logan 43:53  Right, we do have to kind of go do something today.Inna Segal 44:01  Exactly. And, you know, in the same way that it was beautiful, it was also really challenging for her, because then she was kind of like, well, I want to start a business, but there was all sorts of blocks that were coming up for her to start a n business, because she really got into that state of, well, feminine means there's no time limit. You just do what you want. You just kind of, right? And eventually it's she had to step into her masculine and start to balance it out, because you cannot just be in one, you know, constantly.Lesley Logan 44:41  Yeah, one or the other. Yeah, it goes the same with like, oh my gosh, I we don't have time to get into it. But on the ground, these people are, these dudes, this is what it means to be masculine. I'm like, is it though? Maybe you should find your feminine. Maybe you should. But I appreciate that you sharing that story and also, yeah, we it's kind of taking the time to understand both archetypes for ourselves and what that refinement looks like, and then working on what the transition is between the two and when, when you're applying both. You know, I feel like I could talk to you forever, because, it's so beautiful what you do, and you're so knowledgeable, and there's a lot of kindness and how you approach these things, it's also so patient. So, you know, I appreciate that, because, you know, our listeners are like, okay, but tell me. And I think they need to hear it does take time, so we are going to take a brief break and find out where people can find you, follow you, work with you, and your Be It Action Items. Lesley Logan 45:31  All right, Inna, where do you hang out? Where can they buy your book? Where they take courses? Where should they go to learn more about you?Inna Segal 45:39  So the best place to go to is my website, which is innasegal.com I-N-N-A-S-E-G-A-L dot com, and what I really invite people to do is to take a step forward. And in the last few years, what I wanted to do is to take away people's excuses. So I used to do these master classes, slash mini workshops. I used to charge quite a bit of money for it. And then I said to my partner, you know what? I just feel like I want to spread the seeds, so to speak, and I want to give people an opportunity for, you know, some time. And this can change at any point that we've decided to change it, but for some time, an opportunity to access these, you know, mini workshops for free, because I want to take away excuses, because most people have excuses, non stop excuses, of why they don't do something. And the only excuse I cannot take away is you actually making a time for yourself and going and doing it, right? Actually doing the course, the mini workshop, the masterclass, and giving yourself the opportunity to tune in and there's, there's several master classes, so there's option. It's not, I never believe in one fits all kind of mentality. Some, some people very new to my work, my book, The Secret Language of Your Body, and they just want to go, how do I work with the book in the best way possible, right? How do I work with my body in the best way possible? So we have options for that, where people can, you know, can can do a course based on my book, The Secret Language of Your Body, or they might, you know, we also did something called the eight-week challenge where, you know, connecting to your intuitive body, where I go through all the systems of the body through the eight weeks, as well as archetypes and tuning into your body. And this is a way for people to really get to know and understand all the different aspects of their body that shows up and really befriend it. But then I teach, I teach my kind of 10-day workshop of Awake the Healer Within which is what I'm most excited about, because it's what you know, what is the foundation of healing? What does it actually mean to heal on the deepest level? And we talk about and work with a lot of archetypes, from feminine and masculine to the victim to the, you know, inner child, to really understanding your saboteur and how you sabotage your life, how you procrastinate and so, as well as the archetypes connected to your intuition and your capacity to move forward. So, and there's a lot of kind of tools around working with the body and healing and different conditions and energy and so on in that particular offering, which is a master class as well, but it goes for four hours. You need more time, and we go into all sorts of processes. I always, I don't just talk in these master classes. I actually give people a lot of wisdom and processes. And then I have one on your purpose and the sole purpose, and what it even means and looks like, and one on understanding ancestry and understanding your kind of your stages of development. So there's a lot.Lesley Logan 49:17  Inna, oh my gosh, if you try it right now you can, you can access it for free. So you should go do that. Why would you wait? And if you have to pay, I think it's probably worth it. So, I mean, I learned so much already. You have given us so much, and I agree with that. Like, take a step forward so that could be your Be It Action Item. But if you have any other bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it, we'd love to hear them.Inna Segal 49:43  I feel like step one is making a decision that you're you're somehow responsible for your own healing, not for what happened to you, not for all the trauma that occurred to you and other people's involvement. But what can you do about it and without it, nobody actually really heals in a real way. Other people can do all sorts of things for you, but it won't fully hold, because unless you take that step forward, you're not, you know, you're not really understanding what it's about. And so step one is being interested, being willing to understand, taking that responsibility and then searching for it, taking step a step forward, and then I'm going to say is helping yourself from the perspective of, how does this become part of my life? Right? So, how do I make it part of my life? In other words, what do I do when I wake up in the morning most of the time, right? Because we can't do something all the time. Things change. But most of the time, what is your first thought when you wake up in the morning? Are you focused on meditation, divine connection? Are you focused on what you could do during the day? Are you focused on the positive? Are you focused on stress and worry. You know, what, what happens to you? Then you know what happens to you when you're eating, for instance, are you conscious? And I think that's a huge one for most people, including myself, because we're just running and doing this and this and that in the you know, can you start to create time? And I had this conversation yesterday, actually, with my partner. I went to meet his family. He's from the UK, so we went to England last year, and I was watching his family, and I was like, oh my god, I can't breathe because they just ran. There was no stopping, there was no kind of breathing, there was no self-reflection. There was just doing, doing next thing, next, next, next. And he said to me yesterday, he said, I've just realized that, you know, I do my work. We work together. I think like you do with your husband. And he's like, I finished something, and I go, what's next, what's next, what's what's next. And I never give myself time to really connect and tune in. And he and I said to him, yeah, because this is that's all you've seen when you were growing up, I was exhausted watching your family, and I remember at one point I did a process, and I did in the wrong place, in the wrong room, where everybody could see me, where they started coming into the house. I didn't realize how long it would take. And they were like, what are you doing, wasting your time, as opposed to, actually, I'm doing something really important. Why are you not helping us? I was like, oh, because I'm being I need to, you know, I'm doing something for myself because it was, it's non-existent, and he went, it's almost like I feel guilty, or I feel, you know, that I'm wasting my time. That's why, when you keep saying, do processes, but I have so much more to do, but it's practical. And what you're saying to do is impractical. It's you know, internal stuff, but not, I don't see the practical application of it. And, you know, he's like, can I feel guilty, and he's like, I need to change this, right?Lesley Logan 53:18  Yeah.Inna Segal 53:20  And this is many, many people, especially men, where they kind of go up, I just need to fix stuff, I just need to do stuff, as opposed to, unless you're good inside, and you even give yourself an opportunity, like you said, Lesley, to ask questions, to go within, to discover who are you? What do you stand for? What do you do? What are you about? You know, all of this takes time to self-reflect and self-connect. How can you have boundaries? How can you have good relationships with someone if you never think about it right, because that shows up in your body. So how do you allow yourself to access feelings if you're being taught to push them down? Well, it takes time. It takes time for you to explore, but you have to make that choice to explore.Lesley Logan 54:18  I love this so much, and also, isn't it so funny when we see our partner or our friends, where they come from, and then you're like, oh, that's why you don't sit still. No one is sitting still. And my husband will listen to this when we'll do a recap, but like, hey, babe, do you did you see yourself in that description of her partner? Because, we're going on vacation. And he put he brought the computer to the pool. We brought the computer to the pool. And I was like, I'm gonna shame you. I'm gonna put you on the internet. My husband brought his computer to the pool, everyone. You know, but also, you know it's we're all on this journey. We're all learning the more we can actually take it, take your Be It Action Items, and embody them and use them. I think we can. We all get to grow together, and we can affect so many people's lives. Our bubble of influence will be affected in a positive way. So thank you, Inna for being you and for all that you brought to us and all that you educated us on. We're gonna have to talk again, I'm sure, because I barely, I think we barely touched the surface of all that you know, but y'all make sure you connect with Ina. Make sure you share this episode with a friend who needs to hear it, and let us know which Be It Action Item you use and how that helped you. We would love to hear it. We'd love to celebrate with you. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 55:36  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 56:19  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 56:24  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 56:28  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 56:35  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 56:38  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What if your body has been trying to tell you something and you simply weren't taught its language? Lesley Logan sits down with best-selling author Inna Segal, creator of The Secret Language of Your Body, to explore how to listen to your body, decode ancestral patterns, and take responsibility for your own healing. Inna shares the turning-point moment that taught her to stop outsourcing her wellness, plus how to refine your feminine and masculine archetypes without chasing perfection. Tune in to discover why nobody knows you better than you. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The moment Inna chose to heal herself instead of outsourcing it.How to tell what ancestral trauma is versus your own pain.Why healthy boundaries shift over time and with different people.Exploring feminine and masculine archetypes through your family line.Why refining yourself beats chasing the trap of perfection.Episode References/Links:Book: The Secret Language of Your Body by Inna Segal – https://a.co/d/0fL3MSwgCourse: The Secret Language of Your Body - https://www.innasegal.com/slybu-purchase-audConnecting to Your Intuitive Body (8-week challenge) - https://www.innasegal.com/8-week-challengeAwake the Healer Within - https://ww.innasegal.com/new-masterclass-registrationInna Segal Website - https://www.innasegal.comInna Segal Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/innasegalauthorInna Segal Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/InnaSegalAuthorInna Segal LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/innasegalauthorSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Inna Segal 0:00  I'd always relied on somebody else to do all the healing work, and I never actually did any thing myself, because I didn't think I was qualified to do it. I think that I knew how to do it, except that it was my body, and it's your body, when you're that you're dealing with. So nobody knows as much about you as you know about yourself.Lesley Logan 0:23  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:05  Okay, Be It babe, we've talked we've we've had people talk about boundaries. We've had people talk about listening to your body. We've had people talk about getting to know yourself. And now I have your guest expert who is able to actually explain how to do all these things, explain how to actually listen to your body, explain how you can heal yourself. And really, we had a really great conversation about what it really looks like. And I mean, she was just describing being it till you see it in such a beautiful way, without saying it. And I just, I'm so excited that you're about to listen to this episode, because I just finished doing it, and I am pleased as punch. And I feel like I learned so much and or and even things that I think I knew were more solidified, and I have more confidence in that. And I just, I'm excited for you. So here's Inna Segal. Lesley Logan 1:52  All right, be it, babe, I'm ready to have this conversation. I got to talk with our guest today before the end of last year, and I was so excited about all the knowledge she has in the area that we're going to dive into. Also, she's a best selling author, and I think it's really important to bring that up. She is the author of The Secret Language of Your Body, and, you know, as a Pilates instructor and someone who's really big on mind-body connection, I couldn't agree more with someone having access and information on how we can get to know and talk with our bodies in such a better way, I think the world will be a better place if we all could do that. So Inna Segal, if you can tell everyone who you are and what you rock at.Inna Segal 2:28  Thank you, Lesley. So I teach people how to connect to their body and listen to their body, but I'm going to also add the soul and really work with it to transform their health, to transform their emotions, to essentially transform any area of their life which is stuck a block into something that is much more wise, flowing and deep. And so they get to know themselves in a deeper, more enriched kind of way. So it's not a surface-based experience, it's a deep dive experience.Lesley Logan 3:07  I know and that's the hard one. The surface is, I think, easy and necessary to, you know, wake up and go to bed and do some stuff in between, but getting to know ourselves on a soul level. I mean, that is, it feels like it shouldn't be tricky, but for whatever reason, it feels like it's the hardest thing for people to do.Inna Segal 3:29  I think it's the hardest thing just because we are not taught from an earlier age that we should listen to our inner self, and that's through our sensations, through our emotions, through what's really going on within ourselves, but we're actually taught to ignore everything and adjust ourselves to everybody else in the world, and so because of that, I feel that it became hard thing, instead of natural, and part of everybody's life is to go my body is essentially showing me if I'm in alignment with my life, with my purpose, with my relationships, with every part of my life, with my health, or it's not, you know, and if it's not, what is it that I need to change and adjust so that it can be?Lesley Logan 4:27  Yeah, yeah. I mean, oh my gosh, you said so much there that I couldn't agree more with. I think we're all taught from a very early age, you know, to not listen to our feelings even as babies, you know, babies are crying and people are like, it's okay, you're okay, and it's like, well, they're crying, you know? And I get, I get why. And by the way, we have a lot of moms listen, I get why. I probably too be like, you're fine, stop crying. But also like, you know, at what point are we teaching our, teaching them at such a young age to not listen to how they feel, or for us to not listen to how they feel, or how we feel so, so I find maybe our bodies are their own language, like we, we grow up learning English, but our bodies are speaking Spanish, and we were never taught to listen to that language. But maybe I'm simplifying a little bit. Inna, can you I would just want to know before we get too deep into this. Like, were you born knowing all this? Did your parents teach you this? Did you come from a mother who made sure you knew how to talk to your get to know your soul and your purpose or how did you get here?Inna Segal 5:28  Well, my mom was actually she's very open-minded as a person, but she was very much when I was growing up. She was very much into the medical world, and she thought the word of the doctor was kind of the Word of God, essentially. So I went to a lot of doctors when I was younger. I had digestive issues, I had psoriasis, I had really bad back pain, sciatica, inflammation in my back, a twisted back, and I had anxiety just from constantly being uncomfortable inside my body and being in pain. And essentially, I want to say my turning point came when I ended up seeing this chiropractor that I'd seen for a while, and he came out of his office looked at me and said, Your body's stuck. And I said, yeah, I know that part. What are you going to do to help me? And I've been seeing him for a while, so this was not my first session with him.Lesley Logan 6:28  That's good. He's not like, look like, you're stuck.Inna Segal 6:32  Yeah, you know, we'd known each other for some time, and he so he's basically, he basically said, you know, your your body wants to be stuck at this point go home, and I didn't take very well to that. On the way home, I was pretty angry, but because I actually come from a background of professional writing and journalism and editing, I was and I was studying that at the time, I was thinking exactly like you were saying before, from that linguistic perspective that I'm stuck my body's speaking to me. I don't know what it's saying, because it might as well be speaking. I felt like it was more Chinese or Japanese, because I literally I can't even recognize the letters, but what I was aware of is that I'd been going to see somebody for about it was two years solid, between three and five days a week, And I would have, you know, times, maybe a week to maximum month, where I felt better and I could forget about everything and just do whatever I needed to do in my life. But then I would have this crash, and all the pain would intensify and explode, and I would feel like it would get worse rather than better. And so what occurred to me on this drive home was that I'd always relied on somebody else to do all the healing work, and I never actually did any thing myself, because I didn't think I was qualified to do it. I think that I knew how to do it, except that it was my body, and it's your body to when you're that you're dealing with. So nobody knows as much about you as you know about yourself. And so when I went home, I made a decision, I'm going to heal myself. And I essentially just did the most basic things. I placed my hands on my back. I was breathing into my back because I realized that I was holding my breath. And you know, if you hold your breath, you are stuck. And I know you probably know about this more than most of us, Lesley, from teaching Pilates, and you know, and connecting to your body in that way. And so as I was doing that, and counting backwards from 30, it occurred to me to ask for something higher in terms of help. Because I thought, why not? Why? You know, at this point, I mean, there was conflict in me around, you know, whether I believed in it fully or not. And I say this because most people go, well, you have to believe. I didn't believe in anything. I'm one of the most skeptical people you're going to meet when it comes to things, you know, where I need proof for things.Lesley Logan 9:30  Right, right.Inna Segal 9:31  And so, you know, I have a very scientific, skeptical mind, and I ask, because I just essentially felt like, Why? Why wouldn't I? Why not ask for help? At this point, I had zero expectations, but this warmth just moved through my body, and as my eyes were closed, I saw this golden light, and then I said, for whatever reason, or I thought, I thought, I wonder what my back would look like if I could see it, and without any expectation, within a few moments, I felt like somebody switched the light on and I could see my back. And although I was a bit shocked, I thought to myself, okay, this is kind of my (inaudible) to Japanese. Show me. Show me why I have this. What is the real reason that I have this? And the best way to describe this is as in having a memory meets a vision meets wisdom, right? So it was kind of like there were several, I am very visual. I didn't know that I was until that moment, but I am and visually, I could connect back to memories of things that happened. But not everything was a memory. Some of it was more of an insight, vision, understanding, kind of wisdom, what happened. And so I saw I was born in Eastern Europe, I saw myself coming to Australia and going to school and being bullied, and from there, developing psoriasis all over my skin. I saw the conflicts that my parents had in terms of trying to adjust to a new culture going to high school and not necessarily being bullied for not being able to speak the language, but being bullied for not being one of us, so to say, not being because it was a private school, not being someone who came from a super wealthy family, not belonging to the same club, and all of that affecting me from the perspective of, I don't feel myself, I don't feel supported, I don't feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't want to be here and.Lesley Logan 11:57  I get all of that. I get all of that all and I think so many people are probably nodding along, we don't realize how it doesn't have to be so bad that we would be on news show or be a documentary about you, but those little things that make you feel unsafe and or you don't belong, it means that your body becomes this foreign thing you you no one know. Not only do you not know how to read Japanese to talk to your body, but it just you know, if you can't belong in your own body, it's really hard to feel like you belong anywhere. And if you don't feel like you belong anywhere, it's hard to know what belonging in your body is. You don't know what what that feels like.Inna Segal 12:41  Well, exactly, and the last part of this was an understanding of ancestry meets my own, I guess, challenge everything interestingly was coming up around this communication challenge, right? So not being able to speak and be myself, not being able to speak English, not being able to speak the language, and I don't mean, you know, when I, when I got older, the language that people are speaking about. Oh look, this is my label. This is what I bought here, and so on. Lesley Logan 13:18  Oh, yeah. Inna Segal 13:18  So there was an interesting aspect of that. And then there was this ancestral trauma that was connected to my digestive system that took a long, long time to work on. And it was to do with my grandmother losing a lot of people in her family. And then when I was 19, I got pregnant. It was very hard for me to adjust to that idea that I was going to become a mother at that age. Out of all my friends, I would have been, you know, the one they thought would either have kids the latest, or maybe not even have them. So the fact that I was the first, and everyone went, oh my god, wow, okay, was pretty intense. And then, when, then I just had this sense that something was off, probably about a month or three weeks before the baby was born and when, but I was told by the midwives that I was crazy, that nothing was happening. And this is, again, how medical professionals often kind of push aside anything intuitive that shows up, and essentially, the baby died pretty much 38 weeks.Lesley Logan 14:31  Oh, I'm so sorry.Inna Segal 14:34  Yeah. So it was so I was in trauma. I didn't want to leave. I was, you know, I just want people to understand I was at rock bottom, even wanting to be here, and I was 20. In my mind, whilst I don't, I can't say 100% I was told that the baby would have died two or three days before, which was actually my birthday, where I turned 20. So it was, you know, so I kind of connected it to my. Birthday and all of this stuff and that I didn't want to be here, and what's the point of everything in life, and this, this whole experience of connecting to my body, was pretty profound. So I really saw how my grandmother and her loss, she lost her mother, and she she was part of a family of eight, and everybody died, except her and her father, who survived for a few years after the war, and she never really grieved it or worked through it in any way or form, because people didn't at that time, and everybody had digestive issues in my family, and so I could see how the explosion occurred. Especially, I had issues before, but after I had the baby, it was just, you know, I, my digestive system just wasn't working well, and during that experience, I cried a lot. I understood a lot of things. I also realized that I was a sponger. I was one of those people that just took on everybody's pain in general, as well as it all. And after all of these insights, I fell asleep, and then the next day, when I wake up, about 70% of the pain was gone from my back, and I felt different. There was something different inside of me where I went, oh my god, my body's working with me. I can help I can work with it. It's because I made this step towards it that it's coming towards me, even though I'm still super skeptical that, you know, this is not just something that's not going to return. And so, you know, over the next few weeks, I just journaled a lot, I asked a lot of questions, I connected, and by the end of it, all the psoriasis was gone. So that was the first thing that went that was and again, lots of people, my family, have it and have had it their whole lives. So it wasn't, and I'd had it for by that stage, for 10 years. So it wasn't like, oh, you know, I had this.Lesley Logan 17:10  Mis-diagnosis of some kind. Inna Segal 17:11  Yeah, yeah, exactly. And then, you know, I noticed, yeah, my back pain disappeared. My anxiety went down. Digestive Issues took years and years to work on. Lesley Logan 17:26  They do. But also with that generational and ancestral trauma, it just takes a while, because the gut just takes a while to, like, rebuild and do all that stuff and figure out what you need. Sorry, I cut you off. But yes, I actually it feels better that it didn't happen overnight, because that would feel weird.Inna Segal 17:47  Well, yeah, exactly. And that's what people need to understand, is that, especially when it comes connects, like, well, what's the gut about? It's about digesting life as well as food, right? It's assimilating, every day we have experiences, this is our emotional center, one of them, and we always talk about our what's your gut saying? Right? So we already know we have it in our language. So we have our intuition, we have our emotions here. We have knowingness here. But it's also all about how we, our relationships. It's an area that processes what happened during the day, your relationships, your experiences how something happened in your life, and what you believe you're capable of doing. It's kind of where your sense of self lives, and many of us need to clarify what that even means and rebuild it, because a sense of self has been beaten down over the years through all sorts of things in our you know, family and even at work, relationships for sure, and so this is something that is daily, right? It's a daily experience where you go, you know, how did I, how did I go today? Did I push down and push away and just keep going, or did I face things?Lesley Logan 19:20  Yeah, I think that's a great, first of all, I love that you ask yourself questions. And I think that that's where a lot of people, well, I think a lot of people get stuck on what am I asking? But also do I ask myself how am I doing? Yes, that's a great place to start. But I do think a lot of people, you know, it's, it's okay if you're one day, like, I can't do it today. I just have to go through. Okay, one day. But where I think happens is that people keep going the next day into the next day. We procrat, we keep putting off the prioritization of ourself. And that's where it builds up on top of the ancestral stuff. So it's we have our own stuff, and then there's the stuff. So I guess I have, I don't want to forget to talk about boundaries, because I know you've clearly had to figure out how to do that since you are so, since you were a sponge before, and obviously we're probably not now, since you figured this out. But for the people who I've heard of, ancestral stuff, like it comes through, how do people know what's theirs and what's ancestral, and then how do you cut the ties of that? Because is it visually cutting the ties? Is it telling your family that's your stuff? How do you do that?Inna Segal 20:31  Well, it's, I don't know about visually cutting it. I'm not gonna be a fan of cutting things in general. I think I'm more into clearing or being very clear in things that I feel in terms of, again, boundaries, it often takes a long time for you to gain your confidence first, to become aware of what is a healthy boundary, right? So you have to even come to that place of, what does it mean and who with, right? Because it's completely different with different people. So I can be incredibly good with having healthy boundaries, let's say with my students or with my clients, but not necessarily with family. And I'm saying it as an example, right? It's easier with people who are not close with you. The hardest thing is with those who are because you don't want to hurt them and you don't want to be harsh. And so from my perspective, I've done all sorts of things with boundaries. I've spent, you know, countless hours at different times in my life writing them down again. I write to get clarity, and I actually encourage everyone to do that in terms of boundaries, because what does it mean to you? You know, is it self respect? Is it self love? Is it space that you need? What boundary are you actually looking at? Is it actually you know, I know so many people that are single and don't have healthy boundaries with people that they have dated or been in relationships before with, or they keep going and then they wonder why they can't find the part, you know, the partner that they want, and all sorts of things. So there's many, many different boundaries that you need to look at. I think the hardest are definitely when it comes to your parents, children and partner. You know, I really think it's also how you present it and then sticking to it. So for instance, with my children, it's also changed over time. So there were times when they were younger, where it was like, well, you have to knock on the door. That's my boundary. Can't just barge in. So if you barge in, you go back, you know, and you knock on the door, that's a boundary, right? And they had to write down their boundaries as well when they were younger, when they were kind of teenagers, and so on. And then it became, well, you know, with my son, for instance, he would go into this place of overwhelm, and then he would bombard me with negative messages in the middle of the night. And so even if I turned my phone off, which was part of my you know.Lesley Logan 23:15  Yeah, you wake up to a crappy day.Inna Segal 23:19  Exactly. And so I said I had to clarify this to him over and over and over again. You can't do this. If you do this, I'm going to, I'm actually not going to speak to you for a while. I mean, unless you're asking me for help, don't, don't send me this, unless you're willing to do what I'm what I'm going to say, so we had a lot of kind of like, here's a boundary. Here's a boundary. Here's a boundary. With my mom, she used to call me, and the first thing that she would say would be some kind of complaint, and I'd be like, as she called, I wouldn't pick up the phone half the time. And she would go, you know, you don't pick up the phone. And I was like, well, let's think about why I don't pick up the phone. You know, what do you usually say when you call me? You know, do you say something positive? Is it something encouraging, or do you kind of attack and say all these things to me? And so again, we had to have a break for several months from talking to each other, because I was like, you can't do that. And then we had a break another time, because she learned her lesson where, you know, and I would say, I will hang up if you start being negative and telling me all this stuff, I'm not your therapist. I'm your daughter. So, you know, we need to change our game and the roles that we're playing, because this, I cannot grow the way that you're you're doing this. And also, I don't want to be in, you know, like you are with my children. So I need a completely different overhaul of mothering, you know, so that I can be the mother that I think they need. There's so many different ways, and I think luckily for me, everybody in the family eventually, because they kind of got the message in terms of what the boundaries are. But it takes time, and it takes a lot of effort.Lesley Logan 25:24  Well, I appreciate you, one, giving all those examples, because I have asked other people this question, and I don't get nearly the detail. I get be patient, but also be clear. And it's right? I thank you for the you know, the same thing I could read on a blog. What I appreciate is like, you explain how your how the boundaries, healthy boundaries evolve over time, based on the person and based on your needs. And also that it is, it is hard. You have to keep enforcing that boundary until you know it's an actual boundary that they see and you can and it can be appreciated. And also that means that they could have boundaries too. And I think that's where a lot of people who struggle when people put boundaries up, is that they don't realize that they too can also have a boundary they too can go reflect on. So I think what a great example you are. So thank you for diving into that. So I do, I do want, before I forget. I do want to go into that ancestral stuff. Because, first of all, I can only imagine what your grandmother went through. But I do, I do know that, most of us, no matter where you live in the world, if you're over 40, you have grandparents or great grandparents who were in these were World Wars. So there was, there was a lot of loss. And you know, I know my father was in a war that was not appreciated and liked, and in hindsight, was a terrible thing, and so not treated the same as people who were in one of the world wars when they came back home. And so I think all these things depend. So how do you how did you discover what was ancestral with your grandmother versus, oh, this stuff, this over here is my stuff. How did you kind of figure that out?Inna Segal 27:04  Well, I started looking at everybody in the family, actually, and I started asking questions, which were, was I born with this? I mean, in other words, did I bring this with me into this life? Is it does it feel like completely mine, or does it feel like I've brought it? I'm picking it up, I'm carrying this, and if I am, then am I doing it unconsciously in the same exact way that my grandmother, or great grandmother, whoever else did, or my mom? Or am I doing this differently? So I was closely looking at it, and one of the biggest things that we do take on, and that I was watching myself, you know, absorb, let's just say, was constant worry, right? Constant worry, because that was something my grandmother did. My grandfather did it. They had digestive issues, they had surgeries, they had cancers. My mom had it, and I was like, what are they doing that I don't want to get the same health issue? Let's break that down. So to actually, because the biggest thing in my family is intestinal cancers, I was like, okay, let's look that up. Well, in my book that I write, let's look at that right, and let's go, what causes this? And if I don't want to get this, I need to act in a very, very different way, meaning internally, not just on the external which means I need to go rather than just sitting in that state of tension and worry, it's like, what can I do to transform that worry? You know, what can I what do I need to work on in terms of that? So, how do I change that when this shows up? What am I worrying about? And actually, my daughter asked me the other day. She goes, Mom, what do you do when, you know, when things happen to her, mainly to my son. And you know that's different, because she was asking me about this ancestral stuff, and I said to her, well, actually, I start to think I know so many processes, right? I teach them, I write about them. So I immediately get my journal out. I write down what's going on for me, and then I look at what are the processes that are available to me that can help me and him? And it could be as simple as I am focused on buying into whatever he's telling me, which is negative and he obviously wants me to feel as bad as I possibly can feel because that's his pattern that he's learned from, you know, his dad and other people in the family. So what if I don't buy that, and I actually keep seeing him being healthier and being stronger and being, you know, different and so at different times. I mean, not different who he is, but being aware of where he's at. And you know what I found is that it's not immediately that the change happens when you hold something different for, let's say, your your child, but eventually they have. It's like they have something different to adjust to than that ancestral line that you've worked on yourself, and that's how you change things for your family.Lesley Logan 30:50  Inna, that is freaking amazing. It's like, I'm obsessed with this, because it's instead of me turning on the emotion that they're trying to get me to have, I'm visualizing the person that I wish they could be in that moment. I can stay good, and their stuff stays their stuff, and it's not going to solve it in today's conversation or tomorrow's conversation or whatever. But I'm not taking it on either, because it's not mine. I love this so much. Oh my god. I mean, I could keep talking about this with you, but I do want to pick your brain about something that we talked about that made me so excited. You have a whole thing you talk about archetypes and with masculine and feminine. I just kind of wanted to get into that, because I think it's really easy for, you know, with Instagram, to say, like, oh, you got to be in your feminine. And it's like, well, yeah, and I run my own business, so, you know, sometimes I have to talk about taxes, sometimes just got to do it. So I kind of wanted to hear your take, because I'm I also am someone who's, like had gut issues, and I've had a lot of people who listen, who have that, and I'm like, how do I stay not taking it all in, but also, being in this world, this world is a lot going on.Inna Segal 32:02  Yeah, absolutely, when we're looking at archetypes, essentially, what we're looking at is emotion meets your belief systems and a perspective, a particular way of seeing life, meets your life story. So what's actually occurred to you specifically, and also it connects to your ancestry, what you've picked up and you're playing out that you're not necessarily aware of. So let's say we are looking at feminine and masculine as archetypes. So if I'm looking in the feminine archetype, and I feel hardly anyone talks about this, I need to, actually, to understand my own feminine I need to understand my feminine line. I need to understand, well, what was the feminine in terms of my grandmother, let's say, how did she express that? And is that in alignment with what I feel feminine is at this point, so was she warm, kind, loving, expressive, or was she cold, disconnected in herself? What was the example of feminine from, let's say, my grandmother or my auntie or my mom, ideally, all of these people, because that became my idea of what feminine is. Now around the age of 14 to let's say 16, we are as we're growing in that teenage age, which is also an archetype where we're looking at our family, female and females and males, and we're going, who would I like to be like? Who is showing me something that is more appealing to me than the other person? So for a lot of us, especially of my generation, like you said, people in their 40s. You, you, you kind of had that more of a choice than the generations before that, where you looked at your mom and you looked at your dad and you went, I think I want to be more masculine because it looks more fun and I can and I want to, you know, for me, it was like, I want to be like, Madonna, look, if she can do it, I can do it. Lesley Logan 34:32  I wasn't allowed to have her on my wall, but I am so I feel like I missed out on an amazing chapter of life, if I could have had her as my mentor.Inna Segal 34:41  So, you know, and she was quite masculine, and since she went, I'm going to do whatever men do. I'm going to conquer the world, blah, blah, blah. So to me, it was that, and subconsciously, again, no one does this consciously. Subconsciously, I went, well, my mom, so. what feminine means for her. in terms of what I've seen, is cooking, cleaning, doing what you don't want to do, being subordinate to your partner. I'm not doing that. So I was like, I'd rather be masculine than feminine in that sense, again, not consciously, because my dad has freedom. He does whatever he wants to do. My mom does whatever my dad wants her to do, whatever she feels, she's constantly adjusting herself. And so I kind of went like this, you know, bull into the real, into my earlier relationships, going, oh no, it's my way, like I because I cannot be like what I've seen my mom be, which obviously then create a lot of conflict, and made me go, okay, so when I'm looking when somebody says, be feminine, and I'm looking at this, and it's still work, a work in progress, right? And I'm going, so what does it look like today to show up being feminine in terms of this person and that and I thought about it in so many different ways, and one of the easiest ways I've thought about it is through color. So it was like, okay, let's say I'm wearing pink today, so I'm going, pink is a soft color, quite feminine in that sense of expansion. It's it's a love color, but it's gentle. It's not that red passion, you know, and intensity. It's softer than green. Even the green is connected to the heart and healing the heart. So, I, you know, I might go, okay, so what does it look like to be pink and connect to my son, for instance, through that, you know, more of the gentleness let me, let me get to know myself in that feminine through that color. How do I breathe? How do I feel? How do I walk? How does my voice sound? Can I adjust my voice based on this color? Right? Because people get affected. And so it started to look at that. And I also think that when you're looking at again feminine or masculine, it's about role models. It was like, what what do I already have, and what am I missing? And so one of the things, because I grew up in, you know, both when I was very young, in Eastern Europe and then in Australia, most of the time now, in both of these places, gracefulness is not one of the things that you see in terms of women. But in France, you see that all the time. And so at one point, I was like, what am I missing? Oh, I'm missing this sense of grace that I find really attractive in terms of seeing in other women. And so where do I find this? And I was like, I need to, I need to look at old movies. I need to look at French women, not all of them, but. Lesley Logan 38:06  Yeah, no, Inna, this is so be it till you see it. This is the blueprint for how to be it till you see it. And I agree, oh my god, the French women, they know how to just like they exude luxury and grace.Inna Segal 38:20  Exactly. And just watching it and going, oh, okay, let me, let me embrace this. Let me practice this. Right? Because people think, oh, I am who I am, and I'm, I don't agree with that. It's like, you are a refinement, you know? And this is why I don't agree with this whole idea in the New Age movement of I'm already perfect. It's like, what? Why? What are you doing here? If you're already perfect, what's the point of this? Perfection, as my partner says this (inaudible) perfection is the enemy of creation. It's like, you're not perfect. You would not be here. This is not a holiday. You're here to evolve and grow. And, refine. You know, let's not even use the word perfect. Let's use the word refine. And, you know, grow in that sense. And it's the same with the masculine. What I find, for instance, is that people who find it very hard to be successful in the outside world have a very weakened masculine without any doubt, it's almost like that spine of the masculine is weakened inside of them, usually from childhood, usually from, you know, all sorts of belief systems and early failures and lack of direction and lack of support often from their family in terms of, rather than pushing somebody into direction, actually discovering the direction that and supporting them in the direction that is right for them. And so what ends up happening is that these people start having these very, very strong belief systems. But it shows up in their spine like literally shows up energetically in their spine, because lower back, for instance, is all about finances. And you know, how good are you at looking after and supporting your family? And I grew up with people who constantly thought about finances, so it was not a surprise when I figured it out I had back pain, and love back pain. So it's almost like, as you become aware of it, you actually have choice to do something about it. So with the masculine you can, you know, you can go, oh, I need to work on strengthening that archetype, that part of myself, but also my spine, and my ability to handle rejection, my ability to handle objections, my ability to to guide if it is my own business, let's just say my ability to make decisions, concentration, logic, so all of those are beautiful masculine qualities. But I need to, let's say, whether you're in a masculine or feminine body, feminine is creative. It's light, it's a bit chaotic, but it's, you know, it's flowing at the same time, it's colorful, it, you know that there is that divinity and spirituality magic that it has there, whereas the masculine is more about making it happen, taking something that's creative and amazing and putting it into practice.Lesley Logan 41:35  Well, and you can, I would love to hear, I want to make your own opinion for you, but it just sounds like we need both. We have to we all need both. And it sounds like understanding where we got our our vision of what those two things are and how we are using them in our body is going to either help us or it's or it might be what's harming us. And so the more we can take our time to discover who is. Where did I discover my feminine and where am I, where would I like it to be? And where did the masculine happen? And where would, where would I prefer it to be? And then working towards that. And I love that we are not perfect. There's no perfect. Just keep on evolving and refining and getting better and so but the Instagram world is like, oh, I have three friends who are like, I'm just gonna, live in my divine feminine I'm like, oh, okay. I mean, I think that's gonna be hard.Inna Segal 42:32  Well, actually, interestingly, quite a few years ago, when I was separating from my ex husband, I ended up meeting this friend of mine, and she was doing this whole divine feminine thing at the time. And I remember I would call her and I would say, we caught up three times a week at the time, which was amazing. And I'd call her and I'd go, oh, what have you been doing, you know, this week, besides the times we've, you know, caught up, and she'd go, I'm connecting to my feminine I'm just literally lying next to the pool, journaling, you know, getting the sun, having a swim, and that's all I'm doing, because I'm slowing down internally and and she would speak in this beautiful, kind of very slow way. And I remember thinking, it's like she's the complete opposite to me. I don't even know what that looks like, or what that means to just, you know, go, and this was happening over many months, where she just, you know, it was covered. She wasn't working, and she was, you know, she'd pick up her son and do some things in the evening from school, but most of the day was about this and and really embodying it. And I was well, firstly, I think it's amazing that she's doing it, but most of us do not have that luxury of just or a (inaudible). Lesley Logan 43:53  Right, we do have to kind of go do something today.Inna Segal 44:01  Exactly. And, you know, in the same way that it was beautiful, it was also really challenging for her, because then she was kind of like, well, I want to start a business, but there was all sorts of blocks that were coming up for her to start a n business, because she really got into that state of, well, feminine means there's no time limit. You just do what you want. You just kind of, right? And eventually it's she had to step into her masculine and start to balance it out, because you cannot just be in one, you know, constantly.Lesley Logan 44:41  Yeah, one or the other. Yeah, it goes the same with like, oh my gosh, I we don't have time to get into it. But on the ground, these people are, these dudes, this is what it means to be masculine. I'm like, is it though? Maybe you should find your feminine. Maybe you should. But I appreciate that you sharing that story and also, yeah, we it's kind of taking the time to understand both archetypes for ourselves and what that refinement looks like, and then working on what the transition is between the two and when, when you're applying both. You know, I feel like I could talk to you forever, because, it's so beautiful what you do, and you're so knowledgeable, and there's a lot of kindness and how you approach these things, it's also so patient. So, you know, I appreciate that, because, you know, our listeners are like, okay, but tell me. And I think they need to hear it does take time, so we are going to take a brief break and find out where people can find you, follow you, work with you, and your Be It Action Items. Lesley Logan 45:31  All right, Inna, where do you hang out? Where can they buy your book? Where they take courses? Where should they go to learn more about you?Inna Segal 45:39  So the best place to go to is my website, which is innasegal.com I-N-N-A-S-E-G-A-L dot com, and what I really invite people to do is to take a step forward. And in the last few years, what I wanted to do is to take away people's excuses. So I used to do these master classes, slash mini workshops. I used to charge quite a bit of money for it. And then I said to my partner, you know what? I just feel like I want to spread the seeds, so to speak, and I want to give people an opportunity for, you know, some time. And this can change at any point that we've decided to change it, but for some time, an opportunity to access these, you know, mini workshops for free, because I want to take away excuses, because most people have excuses, non stop excuses, of why they don't do something. And the only excuse I cannot take away is you actually making a time for yourself and going and doing it, right? Actually doing the course, the mini workshop, the masterclass, and giving yourself the opportunity to tune in and there's, there's several master classes, so there's option. It's not, I never believe in one fits all kind of mentality. Some, some people very new to my work, my book, The Secret Language of Your Body, and they just want to go, how do I work with the book in the best way possible, right? How do I work with my body in the best way possible? So we have options for that, where people can, you know, can can do a course based on my book, The Secret Language of Your Body, or they might, you know, we also did something called the eight-week challenge where, you know, connecting to your intuitive body, where I go through all the systems of the body through the eight weeks, as well as archetypes and tuning into your body. And this is a way for people to really get to know and understand all the different aspects of their body that shows up and really befriend it. But then I teach, I teach my kind of 10-day workshop of Awake the Healer Within which is what I'm most excited about, because it's what you know, what is the foundation of healing? What does it actually mean to heal on the deepest level? And we talk about and work with a lot of archetypes, from feminine and masculine to the victim to the, you know, inner child, to really understanding your saboteur and how you sabotage your life, how you procrastinate and so, as well as the archetypes connected to your intuition and your capacity to move forward. So, and there's a lot of kind of tools around working with the body and healing and different conditions and energy and so on in that particular offering, which is a master class as well, but it goes for four hours. You need more time, and we go into all sorts of processes. I always, I don't just talk in these master classes. I actually give people a lot of wisdom and processes. And then I have one on your purpose and the sole purpose, and what it even means and looks like, and one on understanding ancestry and understanding your kind of your stages of development. So there's a lot.Lesley Logan 49:17  Inna, oh my gosh, if you try it right now you can, you can access it for free. So you should go do that. Why would you wait? And if you have to pay, I think it's probably worth it. So, I mean, I learned so much already. You have given us so much, and I agree with that. Like, take a step forward so that could be your Be It Action Item. But if you have any other bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it, we'd love to hear them.Inna Segal 49:43  I feel like step one is making a decision that you're you're somehow responsible for your own healing, not for what happened to you, not for all the trauma that occurred to you and other people's involvement. But what can you do about it and without it, nobody actually really heals in a real way. Other people can do all sorts of things for you, but it won't fully hold, because unless you take that step forward, you're not, you know, you're not really understanding what it's about. And so step one is being interested, being willing to understand, taking that responsibility and then searching for it, taking step a step forward, and then I'm going to say is helping yourself from the perspective of, how does this become part of my life? Right? So, how do I make it part of my life? In other words, what do I do when I wake up in the morning most of the time, right? Because we can't do something all the time. Things change. But most of the time, what is your first thought when you wake up in the morning? Are you focused on meditation, divine connection? Are you focused on what you could do during the day? Are you focused on the positive? Are you focused on stress and worry. You know, what, what happens to you? Then you know what happens to you when you're eating, for instance, are you conscious? And I think that's a huge one for most people, including myself, because we're just running and doing this and this and that in the you know, can you start to create time? And I had this conversation yesterday, actually, with my partner. I went to meet his family. He's from the UK, so we went to England last year, and I was watching his family, and I was like, oh my god, I can't breathe because they just ran. There was no stopping, there was no kind of breathing, there was no self-reflection. There was just doing, doing next thing, next, next, next. And he said to me yesterday, he said, I've just realized that, you know, I do my work. We work together. I think like you do with your husband. And he's like, I finished something, and I go, what's next, what's next, what's what's next. And I never give myself time to really connect and tune in. And he and I said to him, yeah, because this is that's all you've seen when you were growing up, I was exhausted watching your family, and I remember at one point I did a process, and I did in the wrong place, in the wrong room, where everybody could see me, where they started coming into the house. I didn't realize how long it would take. And they were like, what are you doing, wasting your time, as opposed to, actually, I'm doing something really important. Why are you not helping us? I was like, oh, because I'm being I need to, you know, I'm doing something for myself because it was, it's non-existent, and he went, it's almost like I feel guilty, or I feel, you know, that I'm wasting my time. That's why, when you keep saying, do processes, but I have so much more to do, but it's practical. And what you're saying to do is impractical. It's you know, internal stuff, but not, I don't see the practical application of it. And, you know, he's like, can I feel guilty, and he's like, I need to change this, right?Lesley Logan 53:18  Yeah.Inna Segal 53:20  And this is many, many people, especially men, where they kind of go up, I just need to fix stuff, I just need to do stuff, as opposed to, unless you're good inside, and you even give yourself an opportunity, like you said, Lesley, to ask questions, to go within, to discover who are you? What do you stand for? What do you do? What are you about? You know, all of this takes time to self-reflect and self-connect. How can you have boundaries? How can you have good relationships with someone if you never think about it right, because that shows up in your body. So how do you allow yourself to access feelings if you're being taught to push them down? Well, it takes time. It takes time for you to explore, but you have to make that choice to explore.Lesley Logan 54:18  I love this so much, and also, isn't it so funny when we see our partner or our friends, where they come from, and then you're like, oh, that's why you don't sit still. No one is sitting still. And my husband will listen to this when we'll do a recap, but like, hey, babe, do you did you see yourself in that description of her partner? Because, we're going on vacation. And he put he brought the computer to the pool. We brought the computer to the pool. And I was like, I'm gonna shame you. I'm gonna put you on the internet. My husband brought his computer to the pool, everyone. You know, but also, you know it's we're all on this journey. We're all learning the more we can actually take it, take your Be It Action Items, and embody them and use them. I think we can. We all get to grow together, and we can affect so many people's lives. Our bubble of influence will be affected in a positive way. So thank you, Inna for being you and for all that you brought to us and all that you educated us on. We're gonna have to talk again, I'm sure, because I barely, I think we barely touched the surface of all that you know, but y'all make sure you connect with Ina. Make sure you share this episode with a friend who needs to hear it, and let us know which Be It Action Item you use and how that helped you. We would love to hear it. We'd love to celebrate with you. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 55:36  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 56:19  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 56:24  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 56:28  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 56:35  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 56:38  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this Fuck Yeah Friday episode, Lesley Logan shares why neuroscience confirms confidence is built by acting before you feel ready, not after. She celebrates a community win from a Pilates instructor prioritizing self-care post-surgery and reflects on the years-long ripple effect of her eLevate teacher training program now halfway through Round Six. The episode closes with a grounding mantra for letting go of what's keeping you stuck. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:A featured neuroscience post on why confidence is built through action.A community win on choosing self-care while recovering from surgery.How eLevate grew from a one-time idea into Round Seven.This week's mantra for releasing what holds you back.Episode References/Links:@letstrainthebrain https://www.instagram.com/letstrainthebrain@pilatescoreuk – https://www.instagram.com/pilatescoreukJay Grmes - https://pilatesology.com/instructor/jay-grimesSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:48  Hello, Be It babe. How are you? My gosh, this is a great weekend. Most of you, if you're in the States, you're leading into holiday weekend, a big holiday weekend. I am leaning into a girls trip, which I can't wait to tell you more about next week. And I'm gonna share a win of yours, a win of mine, and some inspirational stuff. I'm gonna get you on your weekend, because that's what FYFs are about. They're about you sending your wins in so we can celebrate you, celebrate the things that you're doing. This podcast is here to make sure that you get to have all the worthiness and success and love and things that you want in this world and celebrate you along the way. So send your wins in. Send them in, small, big, they can be one sentence, they can be a paragraph. I'll read them all. Lesley Logan 1:24  Before I get into your wins. This says, neuroscience shows confidence is built by repeatedly taking action before you feel ready. So most people have this backwards. They wait to feel confident before they act. Outcome, hesitation, avoidance, overthinking and delaying and because they don't act, their brain never gets new evidence. That means your brain builds confidence in different areas of life, emotional, social and professional through action and evidence. Listen to the podcast intro, action is the antidote to fear, and it brings clarity. More action you take, the more evidence your brain has for you to feel confident to take more actions. So no action, no evidence, no update, no confidence. This negative feedback loop weakens confidence over time. So even if you think I'll never know anything new, then you're slowly going to be less confident, right? Confidence grows or weakens based on the predictions your brain makes about you. Your brain is constantly asking, can I handle this? Those predictions only change from action, not from thinking of taking action. When you act, even while uncertain or afraid, your brain gets new data. I did it. I can tolerate discomfort. I handled it. That new data creates prediction errors in the brain, increasing neuroplasticity. New input action is more manageable than my fear anticipated. Taking consistent action reduces that thread response over time, increases tolerance for uncertainty and strengthens self-efficacy. I can handle this. This is when confidence grows. You don't become confident, and then act. You act. Your brain updates. Confidence grows. Act before you feel ready. That's how confidence is built. So Be It babe. This is literally, a post about being it until you see it. Do you, do you see that? So the link is in the show notes. It's from @letstrainthebrain. So grateful for that. I saw this and I was like, that is the be it, that's the be it that it is. I love it so much. Lesley Logan 3:16  Okay, so now your win. This one is from @pilatescoreuk, going for lunch with friends for the first time out since post op. So if you haven't followed @pilatescoreuk, you should. Kimberly is amazing. I love her so much. She had an unexpected surgery recently, and she's been sharing and showing how she is still getting movement and steps in and and taking care of herself and prioritizing self, even while in pain, even while injured. She has kids, you guys, her life isn't this all fluffy and ponytails, like she is doing it, and she does it in a way to help you see you can, too, take care of yourself in these cases. And so thank you for taking the time to share a win with us so I can highlight you and how you're inspiring me and other people every single day with all that you're going through. So thank you so much.Lesley Logan 4:05  Okay, so my win is, here's my win. You've heard us talk about this and the things that are coming up, but I just have to take a second. eLevate, which is in round six, it's halfway through, where we did the eLevate round six weekend the previous month, their assessments for are coming up. They're going to have their fourth out of five weekends next month. And this is the part where it's like, oh my god. I just like, I'm so proud of the work that they're putting in, but more importantly, I'm really proud of how I continue to challenge myself and understanding how people learn, so I can continue to make each round understand the work that Jay taught me better, and then I get to share that with past rounds as they support the new people and as they come on retreats. But all in all, I can't believe in 2022 when I started this program, I was like, I think I'll just do it one time, we'll see and so my win is kind of big, because it's so many years in the making. So proud I did something scary. I'm so glad I'd be it till I saw it so I got confidence over it, and I'm so proud of how confident I am in the product that we're doing, because it really does change people's lives. And just watching these students at eLevate continue to share their wins, of how they're applying what they're learning and changing how they're teaching and impacting lives around them. Like, it's a win that keeps on going. And I also it's something that I have to celebrate as well, because they love it so much, because past grads have loved it so much, next year is almost full, and that is because of the dedication that my team and I put into this program and so doing something scary that we're like, should we be ones that do this? Shouldn't there be other people to do it? So that inspirational post is really an example of it's literally the thesis behind what I've been doing. And yes, I can say confidence does come from doing the thing before you feel ready. So thanks to all my eLevate grads from one through five. Thank you for six, for trusting me. You guys are working so hard, and people who are set up for round seven, we are going to have a lot of fun. We are. Lesley Logan 6:08  All right. Let me get you a mantra. I let go of everything that holds me back from being my best self. I let go of everything that holds me back from being my best self. You'll let go of everything that's holding you back from being your best self. Yes you will, Be It babe. All right, until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 6:22  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 7:04  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 7:10  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 7:14  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan 7:21  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 7:25  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In Part 2 of the Listen to Yourself series, Lesley Logan delivers a hands-on toolkit for hearing your intuition more clearly and telling it apart from fear. She breaks down what real intuition actually feels like in the body, why so many high achievers struggle to access it, and how to build trust in your inner voice through small, repeatable habits. The episode closes with journal prompts, simple daily practices, and one intuition-led decision that completely changed where Lesley lives today. Tune in for the practical follow-up listeners have been asking for. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How to calm a busy mind using meditation, breathwork, or guided practice.Why true intuition feels calm and steady, not frantic or fearful.Journaling prompts that uncover patterns and reveal your gut's voice.The body sway test and other small practices that strengthen instinct.How to overcome doubt by slowing down and recalling past hunches.Episode References/Links:Breath by James Nestor – https://www.mrjamesnestor.com/breathThe Artist's Way by Julia Cameron – https://a.co/d/0ip3UjJBE-Squared by Pam Grout – https://a.co/d/07pIwZuhEp. 559 with David Corbin – https://beitpod.com/ep559Ep. 388 with Lauren Zoeller – https://beitpod.com/ep388Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  The fear. Voice is so loud because we spent so much time listening to it, we have had way more experience listening to the fear instead of listening to our intuition, and that may be because just of the life that you've had prior to this. Lesley Logan 0:17  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:00  Hello, Be It babe. Hi. Welcome back to our Listen to Yourself series. I'm so happy you're here. Okay, so if you missed Tuesday's episode, you're gonna probably want to hear that one, because it does talk about what is our intuition. What is listening to ourselves? And then also, why is it so freaking hard? And by the way, after listening to all the different reasons it's hard, it's an I'm actually shocked any single one of us can listen to our intuition at all. So I also shared some stories about different times I listened to mine and didn't listen to mine. And I just want to say thank you to all of you who shared your takeaways from that episode. It really means so much to me. You know, it's I record these alone in a room and talking to myself. So I really appreciate when you all share how the episodes affected you, or takeaways and wins and things like that. So questions you have that answer those on Thursday episodes, wins and aha moments, I'll share on Friday episodes, but today we're talking about the tools to help you listen to yourself better. Listen to your intuition better. So sources for this information will be in the show notes. But I have to say, this is kind of fun. There's lots of different things. So here's the deal my, Be It babe. I know that it's easy to try to do all the things at once, and I'm gonna, I'm gonna ask you to pick a couple of these things that sound good and the ones that don't immediately sound easy for you, just ditch them. Save them for later. Give them to a friend, right? Please. My overachievers who are listening, who are in recovery, don't try to do them all. Lesley Logan 2:20  Okay? So some of these might sound redundant as we go through, but know that sometimes we hear same thing in slightly different way. It kind of makes a little more sense to us. So here we go. How do we hear our intuition better? Calm the mind? Use meditation or breathing techniques to quiet the noise. So I will say I love doing breath work, or I like a guided meditation. I know that sounds opposite of listening to yourself, but if you just have music playing for me and I have to just sit still, I'm gonna tell you right now my mind ain't quiet. I kind of need someone that's like, look at this cloud. Watch this thing, right? That's kind of my MO. So if you're like that, find guided meditations or breath work. If you haven't read the book, Breath, that is one of my favorite books of all time to recommend. So I highly recommend it. Okay, tune into the body. So pay attention to physical sensations such as a sense of lightness aligned like an alignment, or a sense of thinking or tightening feeling like not aligned. So lightness is going to fill a line, tightening is not going to fill a line. And that means you're going to have to start body scanning, right? So you might do this one time a day. Maybe you do it in the morning, or you do it at night, to start to just notice where you already feel tight or where you don't feel tight, and so you can know yourself. Because, sometimes it's like a doctor might ask, Oh, how long have you feeling like that? You're, oh, I actually don't know. So it is if you're going to tune into the body, which I highly recommend you do, finding ways to make that a habit. I use this. I use OPC to help our members with this. I use Pilates for myself. So when you do the 100 is going to feel different each and every time you do it, depending on what time of day you do it, depending on what happened the day before, how you slept, all that information, and that is a way to tune into your body. So for me, body scanning I only do when I'm trying to fall asleep, to be completely honest, or if I'm in a breath work that's guided, they're like, pay attention. I've truly used my Pilates to go because I do the same exercises. And I'm oh, I could get more out of that, right? That is a great way to feel what feels light and what doesn't feel light so that I can kind so that when I feel lightness, I know I'm in alignment when I feel tightness and making a decision, I feel like I'm not. So that can be helpful, but that takes time, so just be nice to yourself about learning how to feel alignment and business alignment in your body. Lesley Logan 4:34  Pause and reflect instead of reacting immediately to emotions. Pause to see if the feeling is a panic response or calm, enduring insight. So this is interesting, right? As an ADHD person whose brain goes 17 miles ahead of most people, I am like, let's take instant action, and then, of course, I'll regret how quickly I made a decision, not that the decision is a regret, but how I handled it. Right? So something I am trying to work on is just like, take a moment. Why am I upset? What am I wanting to have happen? What might be all the different ways I could have that happen? And then in taking that pause, it really lets me feel what my inner knowing is actually trying to tell me, which is, you're actually not upset about this thing, you're upset about this thing, and it's coming out here. I think that that takes that also just takes time. So I also wanted to find out, does intuition sound like something? Because if we're going to hear it, what does it sound like? Right? So intuition often feels like a calm, quiet and immediate inner knowing or gut feeling that provides certainty without logical explanation, which is different than anxious thoughts, which are frantic and fearful. True intuition is neutral, steady and frequently experiences a physical sensation, such as a quiet, grounded insight, a sinking feeling, or a sudden, clear, non emotional, not joy. I think it might not have an actual sound to it, but it has from all this research. It doesn't feel you don't feel uneasy when you're listening to your intuition. It feels this is so normal and natural. I think that will help if those, for those of you who are getting having a hard time differentiating between gut intuition and anxiety, right? Lesley Logan 6:20  So trusting your intuition involves cultivating inner quiet paying attention to bodily sensations. Those are somatic markers. We have some, had some great somatic guests on the show, like Lauren Zoeller, so definitely listen to her episodes. If you want to dive into somatics more, you got to practice the intuition in low stake situations. So that's going to be helpful, because we don't want to be making our first decision on a high stakes situation, you got to is it going to the gym, right? It's like a muscle. So key methods for listening to your intuition are going to be in meditation, journaling and slowing down. That's going to help you distinguish that feelings from fear by identifying physical signs like tension or calm and validating past experiences. You can build confidence in your intuition. And I, will say, you know how I get on every guest I'm like, if you're gonna tell us how to journal, what are we journaling about? And I think this is where, if you are trying to listen to your gut more, maybe the journaling is a form of question, why do I feel that way? Why is this coming up? What? How does this make me feel? Where do I feel this in my body? Then you can, you know, write it out, and that can be really helpful. So asking yourself questions based on the gut instinct that you're feeling that might help you discover if it's truly from you, if it's from fear. I can't I mean, slowing down. Oh my god, right. So as I said, there's gonna be a few more here that might sound the same, but we're talking about a different way that might help you. Lesley Logan 7:41  So widening your mind, reducing mental noise, or meditation and deep breathing, or spending time in nature to better hear your voice. So I love this suggestion, because I don't think people get on nature enough. If you've read the book The Artist's Way she has, you go on artist dates, and sometimes it's like just taking your shoes off and walking in grass, right? I think that that can be really helpful. And so if you have a hard time quieting your mind, maybe that's what you're practicing. Listening to your body. We talked about that tightness versus the ease. Journaling daily, we talked about that this is really good. Write down your thoughts and hunches to uncover patterns in your thinking and recognize your intuition has guided you correctly. So taking a legal pad of paper and just writing out what's on your mind, you'll recognize patterns quickly, because, especially if you force yourself to do three pages, here's what happens. Some of you guys are overthinking your thoughts and just gonna say, don't even try to read your writing. Just write. Right? David Corbin will say, close your eyes and just write. But, I think that some people could overthink the journaling, which means you're not quieting your mind. You're not going to get your intuition, but just writing. And what I found when I was doing The Artist's Way page is I found why I was inactive in a lot of decisions, because I was I had so much fear, but I wasn't able to articulate that. And I've been feeling that in my body, but I couldn't get it to my brain. And so it really helped me go, oh, this is what I'm afraid of. Okay, well, is that gonna happen? How could that happen? How can I avoid that happening? Okay, now I can make the decision, right? So you're gonna practice with easy decisions to build trust by following your gut on small daily choices such as, what to eat or who to reach out to. So we're not making big decisions on your job or your relationship. You're just like, hmm, I feel like having a sandwich right now. Okay, let's go have a sandwich right now. Was that? Was that your intuition, right? Like reaching out to a friend? Oh, I feel I should call this person, call them, or at least text them, right? Try that out. Lesley Logan 9:30  So this one is a little bit. Might be a little woo-woo. Okay. But if you read the book E-Squared, you'll, you won't think it. So use the body sway test. Stand up, relax and think of a decision. Feel if your body moves forward, that's a yes or backward, that's a no. My girlfriend, she wanted to see if she if I was drinking something, and she was like, oh, I wonder if that would work for me. And so she closed her eyes, she held it in her hand, and she's like, will this help me? And then her body leaned forward. I watched it happen. I swear to God, so that could be helpful, right? Some other key practices to strengthen your intuition. So, getting quiet, and this means getting in nature or quiet for 10 to 15 minutes daily. I know that's a lot, because, you know that's 1% of your day, so just keep that in mind. Notice physical sensations. I think a lot of us are really not connected to our bodies, which is why I'm such a passionate person about having a consistent Pilates practice, but noticing physical sensations, right? Being able to really notice, oh, my feet are cold right now, or you know just what's going on your body? There's things that are changing all the time.Lesley Logan 10:30  Differentiating from fear. So in Tuesday's episode, we talked about how like, fear can also say it's intuition. So intuition is generally calm and patient and persistent, whereas anxiety feels urgent and chaotic, intense, trusting, small signals. So this is really, this is where I find, like, My intuition is the most helpful. And once I start to notice these, I start to notice bigger ones, but small signals that something just something's going on. You're like, oh, you know, that's what a hunch, right? What a hunch. I'm going to follow that hunch, and then that way, with these little signals, we actually can actually lead to bigger decisions without waiting for the big gut instinct. Like, you should do this, right? Some people do a coin flip method. That's not something I would love, but, it might help you, right? Because, I think if you put a head, I'm going to do this, tails, let me do this, and then it flips. You're like, oh, it's tails. Well, that tells you what you really wanted. You wanted a head. So go to the heads. And then visualize outcomes. Imagine living with each option for a few days to see which brings a sense of peace or relief. And I think that also is helpful for understanding how you feel when your gut instinct is telling you to do something. What does ease feel like in your body? It might feel different than what it feels like for me, right? And then clean up emotions. Suppressed emotions can block intuitive signals, so acknowledge and process fear and anxiety clear the wave for clearer and quieter and more confident guidance. And so I think that that's important. I think a lot of us have a lot of bottled up emotions, which I like to do breath work because or exercise, because you can just, like, emotions just leave the body. Oh my gosh. If you were like, why did I cry in that workout today? Because it wanted to get out. It wanted to get out. And you got to stop suppressing these things because it's clogging up your channels through your intuition. Lesley Logan 12:14  So, in thinking about intuition, I was just thinking about okay, there's obviously a confidence thing here. And if you don't have confidence, you often have doubt, right? So like, how do we how do we figure out how to overcome doubt? And so I think this requires all of us, high achieving, busy people, to slow down, because your busy schedule can mask the intuition because you're not creating space to even hear it. So I'm not saying quit things. I'm not saying stop doing things. What I'm saying is how can you say no to some things, like, look at your schedules, or anything you can, like, take off of it this week. What pressures are you doing? It makes it really easy to start feeling what you're feeling, which means getting into your intuition. Also, I think another thing you can journal about that will help you overcome doubt is recalling past times your hunch was right. I think you need a little have, not a burn book, but some sort of wins hunch book where you put any hunches you followed on and then they were right. That's going to help with the confidence that you need to overcome the doubt that is this my intuition, or is this fear, right? And then being patient, developing trust in your intuition, takes time and consistency, and it is particularly going to take time if you're an overthinker, right? Just something to keep reminding yourself about, because I get it like I have so many things I want to do, I have so many things I care about. And the reality is, I'm one human being, and I can only do so much in a day. And if I'm too busy, I'm missing out on on picking up on things that might just be the best way to dial this way or that way, that can change the course of the impact I want to make. Right? Sometimes we just get on a path and we're doing the we're following the directions, this is the path I made, and I'm here, I'm going to just follow this path. And then there's like, Hey, do you want this path over here? And you're like, I'm too busy to see that ding. And it's like, hey, do you want to see this path over here? It's going to get you there fast. And you're like, Oh, this is the path. Because I'm too busy. I'm not thinking about it, right? Lesley Logan 14:13  I also wanted to give you some prompts for your journal that will help you when it comes to our intuition. So here they are, and we'll have these in the blog, in the show notes, so you can just copy and paste them. What is my body trying to tell me right now? You can even ask. I'll just give you a little second. We can hit pause. What is my body trying to tell me right now? If I were to trust myself completely, what would I do? Would you do anything differently? I would trust myself completely. What would I do? What is the gut feeling I have about blank and why? So if you're like, I don't hear my gut she's not talking to me. Well, what do you think the gut feeling is about that thing? Why do you think that what is one thing I know to be true? So even if I cannot logically explain it, what is one thing I know to be true? And I think that's helpful, it's almost like, oh, that I know that to be true, and it feels like this in my body. So if it feels like this, and this thing over here I'm thinking about feels the same, even if I don't have logic for it, then I then they can both. The feelings are the same, so they can both be true. What does my inner voice feel like? Is it a sound, a feeling or a vision? I think this is helpful, because I hear it as a voice, right? But some of you are more kinesthetic, and you feel it, or you hear some sort of sound. I know people that there's a scent that they'll smell, and then they'll literally, when they hear it, when they smell that scent, they'll stop, and they'll listen to themselves, and they'll actually hear their intuition. And then the scent doesn't fit anywhere. So for example, let's say the scent is Jasmine. There'll be no jasmine plant around, but they smelled Jasmine, and then they paid attention to what they were thinking, and that was how they did it. Or is it a vision? Can you see it happening in your brain playing out? So some more prompts. Recall a time you ignored your gut and what happened. So that helps you figure out what the signs are. Recall a time you trusted your intuition. What was that outcome? When do I most feel in touch with my inner voice? What am I doing when I feel the most in touch with my inner voice, that will help you go and find it. Maybe it's like, oh, when I walk outside, well, then that helps you, because then if you need to hear it and make a decision, and you're like, I don't want to do get the hell outside, right? What is one fear that stops me from listening to my intuition? What is one fear that stops me from listening to my intuition? Like, what are you afraid of? If you listen to it? Isn't it so interesting how when we like call out our fear and we actually say it out loud, how silly it sounds? Lesley Logan 16:47  All right, how can I honor my needs today? Another prompt for your journal. How can I honor my needs today? What does the best version of myself need to know today? That's a be it till I see it. What is the best version of myself need to know today? What feels heavy or forced right now? What feels light and flowing right now? And then you can complete the sentence I am ready for link. Lesley Logan 17:15  And then last thing I just want to leave you with is different ways to journal, because I know you. I know you, and that's why I it on our guests, like, you can't just say journal. You have to tell them what to journal about. So I gave you those prompts, but you can do free writing. I talked about that's like The Artist's Way, or what David Corbin does, just like writing. What's like just going just write your thoughts. Or you can do more of a set the scene type thing. So you create a quiet space. You take a few deep breaths, and you use your journal to remove distractions. So you're probably gonna have more of a prompt there. But you're gonna take a quiet time, ask yourself the question, take some deep breaths. But set the scene. For me, I will just write anywhere some people need to go, in their writing corner that's setting the scene, and then you have to review. So in The Artist's Way, you don't read the notes back, but if you're doing the book during one of the weeks closer to the end, you do go back, and she has you look for certain words to see what the patterns are, and that's going to help you understand the recurring themes, words or feelings. When you do that, that helps you realize your gut is talking to you and that your intuition is there, it makes it easier for you to listen to it in the future without that. Lesley Logan 18:26  So think I want to just leave you with this building trust. Building up that trust to listen to your intuition, it's necessary to pause so you can distinguish between the true intuitive calm and the loud, reactive fear. And I really do think that some of the reasons why so many of us have a hard time listening to our intuition, aside from what society's pressures are, is that the fear voice is so loud because we spent so much time listening to it, we have had way more experience Listening to the fear instead of listening to our intuition, and that that may be because just of the life that you've had prior to this. And I need you to give yourself kindness and grace, and I need you to consider getting help around that, some professional help. If journaling for you like, I've journaled all this. Lesley, this is stupid, great, then you might need some help. And if you I've had help, get different help, right? Because I can say confidently that at the times I've listened to my intuition, they've always led me, yes with obstacles, yes with some pain, yes with some frustration, but they've always led me further along and closer to the person I want to be. And I can connect the dots looking back, but I can definitely could not connect the dots when I was in it. There was no logical pattern for how he's gonna get from a point A to point B. Lesley Logan 19:44  This house that we're in, I told people I wanted to move by June 1st. I was like, oh, I live there on June 1st. And they're like, you can't buy a house in nine days. There's always 30 days of extra. Watch me do it. We found a person who wanted to rent to own. Guess what? Move in nine days. Bought the house on our contract to deed, and we did it, you know. And there were so many times when logic was going to say, that's not gonna work out. I just kept trusting, like, what feels right? When I walked in this house, I was like, I don't use any other houses. This is the house. They said. The rooms are exactly where I want them to be. Is it perfect? The outlets are fucking crooked. No, I gotta fix those. But I think that's where using your gut instinct to get yourself like when you trust it, when you can hear it, when you've got that muscle, it really helps you not focus on what logic is saying. Because if I'd focus on logic, then I would have waited probably a couple more months. Maybe we'd more taxes. Then it had been too expensive. We might have moved to Vegas. We wouldn't be able to we wouldn't, we would not be in our neighborhood. I can tell you that right now, and been priced out. We've been in a different neighborhood and have an office somewhere. Lesley Logan 20:48  So I'll just say, maybe the last thing to say is this, be mindful of whose opinions you listen to that let you let talk you in or out of what your gut instinct says. I have some people my life that when they disagree with me, I just lean heavier. I'm like, oh yeah, because you don't like this idea. I know it's a good one, but that might not be you. Maybe if someone says those things to you, you actually doubt yourself. And I would say they don't get to know the decisions that you're making, not until you get stronger at it. You're amazing. I hope that these two episodes on intuition are helpful. We have ina next week talking about listening to your body to heal yourself. And we're going to keep these amazing series going. If you have more topics, or you want me to dive in even deeper, you have a question, send it in, because that question could end up becoming a two episode series that we dive into and that could lead into a guess all that kind of stuff. Don't keep it to yourself. How can we help you be it till you see it if we don't know what you're trying to be it till right, all right. Thanks so much. And until next time, be it till you see it. Lesley Logan 21:49  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 22:31  It's written, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 22:36  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.coBrad Crowell 22:41  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi. Lesley Logan 22:48  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 22:51  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In Part 1 of her Listening to Yourself series, Lesley Logan unpacks what intuition actually is and why so many of us struggle to hear it. Drawing on personal stories and current research, she explores how subconscious pattern recognition, past experiences, and inner calm shape the way our gut speaks to us. She also names the noise that drowns it out: fear, trauma, social pressure, and over-reliance on logic. This episode is a grounded reset for anyone who's lost trust in their inner voice. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:What intuition actually is, and the science of subconscious pattern recognition.The reason a gut feeling can seem illogical now but make sense later.Three books that explain fear, trauma, and your inner voice.Ways fear, anxiety, and past trauma quietly disguise themselves as intuition.The difference between calm intuition and loud, urgent fear.Episode References/Links:Quora: Why Is It So Hard to Trust Intuition - https://share.google/xCow6Q7yTdKUQMPkoMedium: What Intuition Really Is and Isn't - https://share.google/DBWNMS5g6vafDOAejIPC: What Exactly Is Intuition - https://share.google/eH2S0zlOENreq2AsVPsychology Today - https://share.google/gDyxkjMpOgu31QO75The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker - https://a.co/d/03NEtJNIWhat Happened to You by Bruce Perry and Oprah Winfrey - https://a.co/d/0aOdhLkoGetting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix - https://a.co/d/07Ct9mnJCatch and Kill by Ronan Farrow - https://a.co/d/0aEu2NNzMoonBrew - https://moonbrew.co/lesleylogan20Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  Trusting your intuition is difficult because it's easily confused with fear, anxiety or past trauma, rather than a purely rational guide. It is built on learned experience and subconscious pattern recognition, meaning it can be biased or inaccurate. New situations, additionally high stress, societal pressure and logical over-analytical thinking, often drown out inner quiet knowing. Lesley Logan 0:19  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:01  All right, Be It babe. Hi. We're gonna have a really fun series for you, two episodes. I know, isn't it fun? I certainly hope so. So if you're new to the Be It pod. Normally, in the past, we always had an interview on Tuesdays and a recap on Thursdays. And after five years of doing that, I talked to so many people, I've had so many requests on topics that sometimes it's hard just find a guest who wants to talk about that for like, 20 minutes, right? And so I thought it'd be fun to take some of the topics that you guys have been requesting and then do some deep dive research myself, share them with you, and then we can have other guests come on after that that kind of dovetail into that topic. And so we have a great episode coming out next week, that's all about listening to your body and what it's telling you and healing yourself. And so that led me to going, like, can everyone listen to their intuition? Like, do we all have it? Is it easy to listen to yourself? And so I don't know, let's, let's talk about it, right? I think, as someone who's an Aquarius, who's in her head all the time, I was like, is it, is talking to myself as an Aquarius with ADHD in my head all the time, the same as intuition? And the more I thought about it, the more I realized, like, I don't think so. I think that's just like self-talk. But what we'll see, what the research says in just a second. But I will also say, like, I can think of certain times where, like, there was a very clear voice that came through in my life about what I should be doing next. And I remember going, that is such a weird thing to hear or say or think, and so that's why I feel like it's not the same as, like just talking to yourself. I think there's like a clear voice that cuts through and it's like, hey, hold on. Pay attention to this. I'll tell you a couple of them. Lesley Logan 2:38  One, the voice that I heard in my head when I was in a Pilates class, and this had been in 2007, I did Pilates for a couple of years at that point, and I was, like, it was probably around April or May of 2007 and because I moved into a couple months later. So actually, no, in my mind it must have beenJune, because I, like, was such a quick turnaround, like 30 days. So it must have been June. So I was in a Pilates class, and I heard my voice go, I don't like living here, in the Pilates class, I don't like living here. And I remember going, what a weird thing to say because the truth is, like, consciously, I love living where I live. I live by the beach. Who wouldn't wnat to do that? I've been living by the beach for almost seven years. At that point, like the one of the luckiest people, I had the greatest job. And so for me to say I don't like living here, was kind of like a big thought to have, and that that thought later that day, when I went to work and I picked up the phone and somebody was like, hey, Lesley. She had my same job at a different location in L.A. in Santa Monica, so it was also by the beach. And she said, hey Lesley, she's like, I put my two-week notice in, and it was like, my my mind was like, remember the thing that I heard, and my mind goes, oh, I'm gonna put in for your I'm gonna put in transfer for your job, right? And so then I so that was one moment where, like, the intuition was just so clear for me, for like, what I need to do and how I need to change my life. Another time that I can share with you about, like, listening to my intuition is one of my clients. So two, two parts. So in December of 2019, Brad and I were in Vegas, kicking off our very first tour ever. And we were at Vesta Coffee Shop. It's on Casino Center Drive, shout out to our neighbors, and I've never been there. We're waiting for our pop up to start. And we were having coffee, and Brad goes, I could live here. Said that, right? And I looked around, and I was like, I know it feels like the weird side of Melrose, like the place in town, like we've always want to kind of live at and we didn't have it, and it didn't even feel weird to even think because we loved L.A. So like, it's kind of just a little weird that, like he would say that, and I'm like, we love L.A. So like, why would I go, yeah, you know? And so then I gathered some information. Later that day, I asked my brother, like, do people live here who don't like work in the industry here? And he's like, oh, yeah, you know. And so put that aside. Like Brad said that thing, I had this feeling like, oh. And I got some more information. Then, two weeks after shutdowns and Covid, so we're in April, one of my clients said, hey, this company I work for is going to be working remote until June of 2021, so I think you should break your lease, cancel it, put yourself in storage like you know. And my immediate thought when she said that, my brain was like, space is going to become a commodity. Brad and I need to move to Vegas now, right? And so that was just like this intuition moment that I could then take action on and then, and on June 1st we moved. So I think that, like, it really does require a little bit of information and then trust in your gut, but that's what I think. I'd love to know what you think, and here's what the research says. So let's see if we think I'm spot on, or if you agree with me or agree with the research. Lesley Logan 5:40  So I have two things for today's episode. Today's episode is like, what is intuition? And then also, why is it difficult for us to hear or trust our intuition? Thursday's episode is going to be on tools to actually hear your intuition better. Okay? So that's the breakdown of our lineup. So, and then the sources for this information are always gonna be in our show notes. So, what is intuition? Intuition isn't magic or fantasy. Intuition is the ability to acquire knowledge or understand something immediately, without the need for conscious reasoning or analytical thought, often described as a gut feeling. It acts as an inner voice that processes information, past experiences and pattern recognition on a subconscious level to guide decisions. So you can see from my two examples, like I had to have information. You know, like I I had been living in the place where I've been living for a while, and I've been doing Pilates, and then I had this thought, and then when I went to this to the next part of my day, I got more information. It was like, I can act on that gut feeling, right? Brad and I liked Vegas. Thought about moving here in two or three years, so in 2022 or 2023 and then again, got some information, and my gut feeling is like, oh, I can take action on that. So it's just, it's, it's kind of like the same thing that people could say that luck is the intersection of preparation meets opportunity. I do think that the more I read about this intuition stuff, it's like you have a connection to your thoughts, and then you get, it meets opportunity and information, and then the two connect together and for you to take an action on that, no one else would see, because they're not in you, and they don't, they have different thoughts that get the same information, so it's gonna have a different reaction, right? So key aspects of intuition, there's a subconscious processing. It's not magical, but rather the brain's rapid, automatic analysis of previous experiences, of stored knowledge. So your brain is as a fiel cabinet, and it's got the stuff going on, and then all of a sudden it's a rapid automatic like looking through the files and going, boom, hold on, what? Check this out. Listen to this. Right? Lesley Logan 7:32  Pattern recognition. It functions the mental shortcut, helping individuals recognize patterns in complex situations. One of the things that I joke about, and I feel like several of you listeners have agreed that you have the same thing is like when the shoe drops, I have such clarity of the next thing to go, like the next thing to do, right? So, for example, we were on a plane coming home from Cambodia on March 14th 2020, and I already knew L.A. had shut down. We had heard that the day before, and so we had sent our dog walker to a grocery store, like I just sent her a bunch of money. I was like, please get any groceries you can. Good luck. Stay safe, right? And we're on this plane, and I'm getting all these emails of all these people who are trying to cancel contracts I have for the year. And I told Brad, I said, the Pilates industry does not know how to teach online, and every single person has to go online yesterday, so when I get home, I'm going to teach the people who are in our Profitable Pilates agency membership, how to teach online, I'm going to to do that tomorrow. So I like set it up. I told everyone at this time, at this day, it's your part of your membership. I'm teaching you. And then I had a public one that I charge for for five days later. So I knew based on just how much of my life experience as a teacher that was teaching online, and then so I knew what I had been doing, but most people are not trained to do that, and so it was this like mental shortcut that I was able to go, this is a complex situation. Hold on. I know how to teach this. I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna let it go. I'm gonna do it right now. It's like, it was this like urge that I had to get it done. I'm really proud of what we did and how we saved so many people's businesses because of that quick mental shortcut. Pattern Recognition, right? Lesley Logan 9:07  Speed and emotion, intuitive thoughts often appear quickly in consciousness accompanied by an emotional or physical sensation. Right? Speed and emotion, intuitive thoughts often appear quickly in consciousness accompanied by an emotion or physical sensation. Bridge between mind and logic. It bridges the gap between the conscious and unconscious mind operating beneath layers of logic. And I think that is really important, because I believe that in hindsight, we can see how logical some of these gut instincts, intuition moments are, but in the actual moment it it seems illogical if you were to tell people, like, when I came home and told Brad, I was like, space is gonna be a commodity, we need to buy a house right now. Luckily he just, like, had been on board with my crazy thoughts already, but a lot of people were like, you shouldn't be spending any money right now. There's so much uncertain. Like, the logical part would be like, don't buy a house right now, right? So it really does bridge the gap between these two. Lesley Logan 10:00  How it works. Intuition relies on tacit knowledge, which information, which is information gathered over time that is not consciously recalled. It's particularly effective in situations where quick, high stake decisions are required, such as detecting danger, assessing a person's trustworthiness. While powerful, it can be influenced by biases such as past negative experiences. That's important, your intuition can be a little flawed based on your past experience. Experiences, so it's always important that you are growing and learning. Because there's two books I want to that my brain just recalled that I feel like, oh my gosh, we have to talk about these right now. One of these books is called The Gift of Fear. It's by Gavin de Becker, and the book when I read it, so I will say I've read it with a diff in a different place in my life, but when I read It, there's an interesting part about how your gut will tell you, like something, like instinct about something, but then logic will tell you something completely different. And so then you'll lean on logic when your gut instinct was to, like, not trust the person, or not trust the thing. Now with that said, if you have a past experience in the subconscious that can actually affect you reading your intuition a little incorrectly, let me explain that there's. Oh the other book. Here we go. So there's the book What Happened to You, and that is with a great doctor and Oprah, and it talks about how your brain is developing. So as a child, if someone had a special scent or smell or voice or something like that, it will attribute that scent or smell or voice response to some and let's say that person was a negative person in your life, it will attribute that. So if you smell that your your gut instinct might be to feel fear and unsafe when that person has nothing to do with that, and that's in the present moment that has nothing to do with that. And but you're you're you're misreading based on your past experience. So you do want to make sure that you're you, if you have any of any traumas in your life, that you're not necessarily using that trauma to cast a judgment on somebody else you don't know. But so definitely, The Gift of Fear, read What Happened to You, if that's some if you have anything like that, if you smell something and it instantly makes you want to go, oh my god, I gotta leave this place. I would definitely explore that so you can retrain that, because it could be a shitty person. But if it's not, we don't want your intuition to lead to the wrong way. Okay, the third book, I didn't finish this book, I will say, and I have no idea if this author ages well in life, and we're not going to go down that road, but, but in it's called Getting the Love You Want. And I had a lot of parents who were couples read it, and they were a really in problematic relationships. So I don't know why I took the recommendation, but I was in a different relationship, and I was like, okay, I want to read this with you. And of course, big red flag, they did not want to read it with me. But one of the things about in the first chapter of this book, which is, like, the most important part that kind of goes with what I was just talking about in What Happened to You is that when we get into relationships, we fill all of our holes up, right holes with an H, and we fill all of our holes up, and then we project the person that we're with filled those holes up, but we actually just did it ourselves. And then when the relationship is no longer new, and we are tired of filling our holes, we stop doing that, and then we blame the other person for change. Person for changing when really we were the ones that were doing that. But in that book, it talks about how oftentimes we cast judgments on people based on subconscious thoughts from early childhood with different people in our family. So we either trust someone because they seem like their energy, seems like your grandmother, who you loved, or they seem like your your stepfather, who you didn't, right? So, so definitely worth if you have, if you're having a hard time trusting yourself, or you are, you feel like you might be misinterpreting based on past experiences, you might want to check those things out. Or, instead of reading the books, just go get some great, wonderful help. Lesley Logan 13:45  Okay, so back to this, how it works. Remember, I'll just repeat myself. Intuition relies on tacit knowledge, which is information gathered over time that is not consciously recalled. It's particularly effective in situations where quick, high stakes decisions are required, such as detecting danger or assessing a person's trustworthiness. While powerful, it can be influenced by biases such as negative past experiences. So definitely, I agree, like I think that intuition isn't something that's like happening all day long, all the time, although it could be, I guess. But for the most of us, we're really like relying on it and like paying attention to it in times of need, when we have to make a quick decision, and that's almost like you get a little more clarity, right, like the mind chatter does stop, so you can actually hear what's important. So we have some examples. So if a soldier or police officer is sensing danger in a seemingly safe environment, though that could be like, where your intuition is like, ooh. Like, why do I feel weird in this place? It's so perfectly wonderful interpersonal feeling an immediate sense of unease or trust regarding a new person, right? You go to a family event, someone brings a friend, and you're like, I do not like this person. I will say, okay, I remember in high school, I always watched Good Morning America. My mom would always find The Today Show, and I was like that, Matt Lauer guy is weird. There's just something about that. Matt Lauer guy I do not like, and she's like, Lesley, you don't even know him. He is a reporter, and I am not. I could not stand the sound of his voice. So then, when I read Ronan Farrow's book, I was like, fucking knew it. I knew it. I knew it, right? Like it's so, so I will say sometimes it's like, it feels illogical to other people, but you might have an immediate sense of unease or trust regarding a new person. And then skill-based, an expert making a split correct decision in a fast paced game or in a professional setting based on deep experiences. You've seen this in the movies, right? You've even done this, right? So this is, as a Pilates instructor, something I try to teach other Pilates instructors is, like, it takes time for your gut to be like, they need this exercise over here, but it doesn't come if you're talking all the time, right? If you constantly are counting for clients, and you're constantly talking the whole time, you can't actually be present enough to see if, like, what's going on, and then you can't hear the intuition saying, I think they should go to this exercise over here. I'll never forget the time that I was watching Jay Grimes teach, and I said, oh, why did you give him that exercise? He was like, I don't know. My gut just said he needed it, right? Like, that's the that's a skill-based one. That's the one I pride myself in having. Lesley Logan 16:00  Okay, so now let's actually talk about why trusting your intuition can be difficult, like why it might be hard to hear when your intuition is talking to you. So trusting your intuition is difficult because it's easily confused with fear, anxiety or past trauma, rather than a purely rational guide. It is built on learned experience and subconscious pattern recognition. Meaning it can be biased or inaccurate new situations. Additionally, high stress, societal pressure, and logical over analytical thinking often drown out inner quiet knowing. So I'll just say, like, I think sometimes we can't hear it because we don't want to, because we know the answer is probably something that's we're doing that's different, you know, like that past person I was with who didn't really read the book. I remember being on the 101 freeway, and I remember thinking, gosh, I wish he would just break up with me. Right? My thought wasn't like, oh, I should break up with him. It would say, would you just break up with me? And then I was like, oh, my god, and I'd have to move and I have to do these things. And like, he's not a bad guy, and, like, on paper, he wasn't. So like, it's really interesting how we can, like, have intuitive thoughts and then, like, because they don't make sense in logic, we kind of, like talk ourselves out of it. Also say, I remember having, I remember this distinct moment where my brain was like, you should just make a left here. And I was like, why would I make a left here, and instead I made a left, where I always make a left, and I was in a head on collision. So, you know, I don't know why I thought that, but I, like, literally, wasn't listening at that time in my life. And so I think it can be, depending on what's going on in your life, it can be hard to listen to those things, or you might not. You might have a series of time of just actually not trusting yourself and the decisions you made. And so then you when your inner intuition is telling you something you haven't you don't have trust there, right? And so I feel that I see that. Lesley Logan 17:46  So here are some other main reasons why it's hard to trust your intuition, confusion with fear and trauma, what feels like a gut feeling is often an emotional reaction based on past trauma, fear or anxiety causing you to overreact. Anxiety often masquerades as intuition, especially when facing new or challenging but harmless situation. So again, I do think if you know that certain things cause you some anxiety or fear, it is absolutely worth go and exploring that with someone who with a professional because what I don't want you to do, and what you take from this episode is that, oh, when I have fear anxiety, it's like, not real, and I should just listen to my intuition that is like, that's not what I want. I actually want you to get some clear, urgent support, so that you can recognize the difference between anxiety and intuition, right? Context dependency. Intuition relies on learned patterns of the past. If you're in a new or unfamiliar situation, your gut may not have the necessary experience to provide accurate guidance, making it unreliable in, for example, on modern, complex scenarios compared to simple, repetitive ones. So like, I think this is where you can if you are in a new situation, a new job, a new totally different thing, maybe, like, you're supposed to fly into JFK, and you end up flying into some other place, and now you're like, it's gonna be really difficult to hear your gut, because your your your intuition, because your brain doesn't have a file for that place, and so it's, it's almost like a lot of noise, right? So then I would just say, like, don't judge yourself for not being able to hear yourself. Your brain is trying to take in the information it needs before it can even pipe in with some intuition. Logical over analysis. The logical sensor in our brain often dominates decision making, dismissing subtle nonverbal or non logical cues. So if you read The Gift of Fear, he talks about how like he was in a restaurant and it smelled like the smell, smelled like Italian. And he was like, oh, Italian. And he's looking at like the name of the restaurant, and it's Italian. But the pictures everywhere are not Italian restaurant pictures. They're they're quite very they're quite different, right? And so his, he knew he like lot, like his intuition, like, Oh my god, look at this. It's onna be a great Italian meal. But then the logic around him was showing that it wasn't Italian. So he's like, oh maybe it's not Italian, so maybe it's it's whatever he thought it was, and I should order this x, y or z, then the menu came as it was fucking Italian, right? So it's really easy for us to talk ourselves out of what we're actually hearing by using logic. And logic can, logic is there for a reason. I'm not bad mouthing it, but sometimes it can lead you astray, and because your gut had is actually picking up on the subtler things that are, that are actually what's going on. Mental noise and stress. High levels of stress, depression or being a state of shock, can distort or block intuitive signals. So you're stressed out right now, my love like, that's why you're not hearing it right. You're not hearing your intuition because you're in a high stress space. So it's not like a meditation a day is going to solve that problem. You might have to do and make other changes, but be kind to yourself. It's gonna be harder to hear. Got a lot going on. Prior failures, past mistakes can make you lose confidence in your own judgment. And I think this is where we have to be really kind to ourselves, because I always believe we fail forward. I really do believe that like making like if you think you made, in air quotes, a bad decision based on something you thought your intuition, and it led you to door number three. Well, my thing is that, you know, if you didn't die, then door number three is not a bad door it's an experience you need to have. Your brain would actually have more information to make better decisions in the future. And so actually, maybe you're supposed to go through door number three, and your intuition was spot on, right? Like, I will absolutely say, like I would not be here talking to you today had I not gone and taken that first Pilates class when my logic noise was saying, do not do that, right? I would not be here today if I had relied on my past failures. Of like, the first time we did Agency, nobody bought it. But now Agency is, like, eight years old and has helped 1000s of businesses. So I would just say like you're gonna fail in life. It doesn't mean you can't trust yourself. It means you had to learn something so that you can have even greater information and success in the future. But just be kind to yourself. Social pressure, the desire to conform to social norms, where fear of judgment can override your internal signals. I think this is really huge. I will tell you right now, my gut was spot on with all my exes, every single one, but especially my last one. I remember my gut was like, this is I think we should let this one go. And people at my job were like, oh my god, he sent flowers. Oh my god, he picked you up for a date. Oh my god, he did these things. And so then I stopped listening to my gut ended up in a five fucking year long relationship. Right when I can tell you right now, within 48 hours, my gut was like, should move on from this. You know. Anyways, that happens, though, because societal pressure and norms can, like, really change your decisions on, on what you're doing, and make you not listen to yourself. Self-sabotage, sometimes self sabotaging behavior disguise itself is the gut feeling to keep you in a comfortable, familiar, but limiting state. So what I will say is, I have many people saying, oh, gosh, I had this obstacle, which means I'm probably not supposed to be doing the thing that I'm doing. And I would say, like, actually, is that it's saying, or is it saying, like, hey, how bad do you want this? Are you going to work a little harder for it? Right? You know what I mean? Like, I think, like, first of all, I think too many people think that things are going to come like, easy for you, just because you have this great idea that it's just going to be easy to do. Nothing is easy to do. We're working on two major projects right now that scare the fuck out of me, if I'm completely honest. And every time I think maybe we shouldn't do it, my gut's like, oh, you're doing it like you you're supposed to do it. Like, talk about, like, that gut instinct where, like, there's that emotional and physical feeling we talked about earlier in the episode. Like, every time I think I'm not going to do it, I actually feel uneasy. And when I think, like, well, I am going to do it. It's like, yeah, because that makes the most sense. So I would just say that, like, it's easy to self-sabotage and stop yourself and call it intuition, because you're feeling an obstacle, but that's not necessarily what's happening. And how do you know if it's self-sabotage or actually a gut intuition? I think you'll have to actually just look back at your past behaviors. Are you doing something you've done in the past? Oh, something's getting really hard, and so you're talking yourself out of it, right? Maybe you have to ask yourself, like, what is the cost of not doing this? Like, you might have to just take a little bit more time and do some journaling, or give yourself a little bit more time. Let me just hang on a little longer. I can always stop this in the future, but let's just, like, take a little bit longer, get a little bit more information. Now that said, sometimes people are so afraid of self-sabotage that they talk themselves into being in jobs longer and relationships longer and other things longer. So I just say like, you know you the best. This is where you have to get honest with yourself, right? So it's because I don't want you to be like, -h, I'm I don't want to self-sabotage if I stick out this thing and I and Lesley said, so no, I just want you to just pay attention to your own patterns and what is going on. Here's the thing, hearing your intuition is difficult because it is a quiet, subtle inner voice that is easily drowned out by loud, racing thoughts, fear and societal demands for logic. It is often hard to distinguish from anxiety or past traumas, which present as urgent, emotional and reactive, rather than calm and steady, like if you are someone who is like feeling the effects of cortisol has had past trauma, has a lot going on in your mind. You're it's you're there's too much uncertainty in your life. I just want you to know if you're having a hard time hearing what to do next, it's, it's because you got, there's a lot going on and there's a lot going on right now. Oh my god. Like logic and society would say, let's not start anything new right now, right? But I will also say that, like, some of the craziest things I did at times were the so uncertain I am, like, sitting in this beautiful house, that people are like, you're crazy to buy a house when, like, you're not even sure what Covid is going to do with your business right now. Now, I also don't want people to go into debt, because it's, my gut says so, like, we have to really make sure that we're, we're making decisions from the right place and sitting with those things. And as you build that up, you might need to take some time and make sure that, like, it's the same answer. You know, you like, start, like, shake a magic eight ball, and you get an answer. You're like, I don't like this answer, and shake it again to get another answer. This is, like, I would say it's the opposite. It's like, maybe, if you're working on trusting your intuition and not self-sabotage or talking yourself out of things or using society's pressures to stick with whatever you're supposed to do, maybe you're looking for the eight ball to say the same thing three days in a row, right? All right. Lesley Logan 26:22  So just a couple, just to go on to that, because I know, I know you my listener. I know you need more information. So here is more information on why it's hard to hear your intuition. So overthinking and noise, overthinking, chronic overthinking. Hello, my chronic overthinkers. I see you. Stress and anxiety create mental noise that drowns out the quiet, subtle whispers of intuition. So if that's you, might want to be taking some time, maybe the habits to try to figure out, like, what do I do with my overthinking thoughts? I am an over thinker at night. Holy frickin moly, it is insanity. So guess what? MoonBrew, extra magnesium, a little extra support from my hormone specialist, and I can overthink in the morning, and then I'm like this. It's too beautiful to overthink right now, right fear, miss it misidentified as intuition. So true intuition feels calm, while fear-based thoughts are loud, urgent and emotional. We often confuse fear or past trauma, for example, needing to protect yourself for intuition. So I think I love that they brought this up, because it's like, how do you know? And as I've just mentioned a few times, it's one thing I'm thinking of doing every time I think about not doing it, it doesn't feel easy. Every time I think about doing it, this is gonna be the hardest thing I've ever done. But there's a calmness, like a confidence to my body that I feel, right? Over reliance on logic, so society priorities is data, facts and rational thinking, leading us to dismiss gut feelings that lack immediate logical explanation. So just notice, like, look, I do believe in data over dogma, but just kind of notice when you're letting other people's need for data determine what you how you make your decisions, that's their need, not yours. Lack of inner calm, intuition requires a grounded, present state. You're overwhelmed, ungrounded, or disconnected from your body, you cannot hear the physical sensations that often accompany intuitive nudges right. So like, I will just say, if you are not in an inner calm state, you should not be making any decisions. One, you're not gonna hear your intuition. But two, like, we all make poor decisions. Date terrible people pick big fights when we're not in inner calm state. So you might want to figure out things that help you with that. Lack of trust and self-doubt, low self-confidence or history of dismissing your own feelings can make it difficult to trust your inner voice when it does speak. I feel that I get you. I've been there. Lesley Logan 28:27  So my love. I hope this gave you some like kind of thought and some insight about, like, intuition versus inner chatter, versus why it's hard. I hope you know like it's totally normal to feel like you have lost your inner voice, or that you don't have that trust there. I think that there's just so much going on, and I don't know that our intuition can really, like, compete with, like, the scroll, the instant scroll, of so many things that are going on and and, you know, the time I'm recording this, like, you know, the President is, like, threatening to be at war. But also, you know, that's a distraction for the files. And then there's this happening over here, and then the hockey team just bringing up what every single female, like, always feels is happening all of the time. And you're just like, oh my god, and I have to go to work, and I have to fill this thing out, and I have to figure out how I'm gonna make this big decision. And so I just want you to know, like, there is a lot going on, so it can be hard. And I would highly encourage you to figure out, maybe brainstorm, go back to the habits episode and brainstorm all the different things that you could do to try to just like, get a habit or a thing that you could do to help you calm your nervous system so that then you can make decisions from a better place, and just remember that taking all that information is helping you with your intuition. Your intuition relies on information that you have filed away. Hard to have intuition on something you've never done or experienced or know, right? So I think you're amazing. I really hope that you are into this series. So Thursday, I'll give you the tools for listening and hearing it better, and then next week, we're going to have a really great guest who used her inner knowing and inner guidance to help heal herself. So I think that there's there's so much that our intuition and our inner guidance can do if we're listening. And so I hope this gets you started. Lesley Logan 30:18  If you have a topic that you want me to discuss, or if you have something related to this that you want to share with us, you can send it to the beitpod.com/questions. Ask a question. You can share a win about it, or you can you can just tell us, I'd love to hear how this is helping you and until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 30:32  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 31:14  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 31:19  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 31:24  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 31:31  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 31:34  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this FYF episode, Lesley Logan delivers a list of ready-made responses for the moments when family, friends, or strangers say something offensive, intrusive, or just plain uncomfortable. She also celebrates a community win from a new Mat Pilates teacher trainee, and shares her own win about protecting her Intellectual Property after discovering AI-generated theft of her images. With a grounded mantra to close, this episode is a reminder that setting boundaries is an act of self-respect. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How to respond when someone says something offensive in real time.Lines to use when family pushes politics you don't want to discuss.What to say when comments about your body won't stop.Boundary scripts for unwanted dating, family, or finance questions.How Lesley handled AI-generated theft of her images and brand.Episode References/Links:the Skimm' (@theskimm) - https://beitpod.com/theskimmSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:48  Hello, Be It babe. Welcome to your mid month of May. FYF, it's our third of five Fridays. So we have a lot of May, May celebrations, which means that you have five chances of May to find something to celebrate, something to send in, something to remind yourself you're doing a great job. You are and you're on your way to being it till you see it and you're doing yourself a great job. So this thing that inspired me that I'm sharing with you, okay, here's the deal. It is quite possible that I shared it last fall, and if I didn't, I fucked up, and I'm sharing it with you now, because it does say how to set boundaries of family this Thanksgiving, if they say something offensive, but honestly, like because this world continues to be in a shit hole, and people around me that I like thought agreed with me on a lot of things, sometimes say things and I'm like, whoa, that's fucking offensive. I thought maybe we need a reshare. So if you need a reminder of this, here's what it is. So if someone says something offensive, doesn't have to be Thanksgiving, it can just be around you. What an odd thing to say out loud. I feel uncomfortable with the statement you just made. I don't get it. Can you explain that one? Wow. I'm not sure how to respond. That was an unkind thing to say. That's an inside thought. And so I like those. I think these are great, like, it's like, you, at least, can respond, and it maybe makes them think, if it doesn't. So if it's politics you want to avoid, then you can say, this isn't a conversation I like to have right now. Or you can say, I have a lot of thoughts in the state of the country, but I'd rather share them another time. You can also say I won't be engaged in talk about politics if we can't stick to other topics, I'll take a break from the table. That one's a little more confrontational. I'm not willing to be badgered right now, so I'm going to walk away and do all of those things. Remember, we are the five, we are like the people we hang out with. If comments about food or your body won't stop. So this is important because I really do believe that like stop commenting on women's bodies. We just fucking need to. It makes me feel uncomfortable when you talk about my body. So I'm going to end this here. I'm really trying to have a better relationship with myself this year, I'm going to ask that you not comment on my looks. I'm listening to my body and what it craves right now, let's focus on something else, rather than my plate. I thought we were past talking about people's weight in 2025. So I think that that's, you know I know that can sound like, oh my god, I'm gonna make them uncomfortable. Yeah, they're making you feel uncomfortable. We have to get good at making people who make us feel uncomfortable feel uncomfortable too. If your relationship status family planning is the unwanted subject, honestly, I would love to chat with you about blank rather than my dating life. I like to keep that private right now, I might not be engaged, but I have blank going on that I'm happy to talk about, instead. Kids aren't in my equation right now, I'd rather work on expanding my family when I'm ready. So those are all and I think you can like, you can change those to like fit your situation. But I do think like giving them something else to bring up is also fine, but like letting people know I want to talk about that, it's all, boundaries are kind, and if they're commenting on your finances, well fuck them. But you can say, if you're trying to help, I could use some advice on blank otherwise I'm good. So give them a thing that you want to talk about. Rather than getting all this unsolicited advice. I'm doing my best in a stressful economy. I'm managing my finances well and making progress towards my goals. That's all you need to know. And then if the question just fills what's the last one? If the question feels personal, a little too personal, this isn't something I want to talk about right now. That's a sensitive topic for me, let's talk about something else. Actually, I've been wanting to ask you about blank how's that going? So that one, you know that one might be a little spicy, but I hope these help. Feel free to look at the transcripts of this podcast, copy and paste it, put in your notes, easy to text to people who ask uncomfortable things or say, I'm you know. You just pull it up like, you know, you'll get better at it. But it's important, we have to have these things at the ready, because sometimes we're like, oh my god, I don't know what to say and they just, like, said something awful. Lesley Logan 4:49  Now for the wins. I, you know Be It babe, I got your back on these things. The win that I'm gonna share today is from CAGoodfellow, hi, Lesley. I've now started my class, Go Mat Pilates Teacher Training Course. I know this person, and this is a huge deal. So happy for you. I'm so happy for you. Give me a post on how it's going. Lesley Logan 5:10  All right, my win, and then I'll get you a mantra and get you on your way. So I found out that someone used AI to steal my images and write a shitty book. And I was like, oh my god, this is, like, so annoying. It's gonna take so long. And the team went to action, and Amazon took the book down in like, no time at all. We put it up there, proved that it was ours, our images, and they took it down. And when telling people about this shitty thing, I found out that other people were using my images, which like, you think, oh my god, that's gonna be so terrible. Yeah, it sucks. It feels violating in weird ways. I mean, like, it feels weird to even use that word violating, because it's like, is it? But like, it it is. And people are like, oh, don't let this take up your amazing energy. Here's the deal. You have to protect your IP so it does have to take some energy. But I'm really proud of how I've been able to trust the team to find a new system and to put in place to to take care of this situation, and it not keep me up at night, but we are taking action, legal actions, where, where we can. But I didn't let it like derail the goals I had that week. I was like, okay, this is happening. What can we do? What are our steps? What's our first step of action and and then work on from that, I it's just really, it's really nice not to like, end up in a puddle of like, woe is me. Now I've got to do this, too. And in asking for help, I got to see how many of you are like, here to support the work that we're doing, and you understand what that means. And because of you, we're finding out the images that are being used that are like in hidden places a little harder, and I'm so grateful. So if you see images of me, they're not on my flash cards and they're not my posters, most likely I did not give them permission to use them, so just send it, and if I did, I'll let you know. Lesley Logan 6:56  All right, your mantra is, each part of me is worthy of love, each part of me is worthy of love. Each part of you is worthy of love, Be It babe. Thanks so much for being here. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 7:13  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 7:55  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 8:00  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 8:05  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 8:12  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 8:15  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell sit down to unpack their favorite moments from Dr. Corey Winn, doctor of physical therapy turned women's business coach who pointed out the things keeping high-achieving women stuck. In this recap, they get honest about the patterns that quietly hold smart, capable women back, and what it actually takes to break them. If you've been doing all the right things and it still doesn't feel like enough, this one's for you.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Why high-achieving women struggle to feel worthy of their own success.How "I don't have time" is often hiding your real obstacle.Why you must actively curate who's in your inner circle.How to build a schedule that doesn't burn you out.How to use your calendar to protect at least one daily joy.Episode References/Links:Nevada SPCA – https://nevadaspca.orgeLevate Mentorship Program – https://lesleylogan.co/elevateOPC Spring Training – https://opc.me/eventsOPC Summer Tour Waitlist – https://opc.me/tourDr. Corey Winn's Website – https://www.coreywinn.comThe Carl Edward Foundation - https://www.thecarledwardfoundation.orgEp. 5 ft. Amy Ledin - https://beitpod.com/ep5Ep. 185 with Dai Manuel - https://beitpod.com/ep185Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  To be honest, if you're waiting for someone else to say you're worthy, that's the problem. Like, I think everybody's waiting for outside indicators that they are worthy. You actually are born worthy. The fact that you're here is why you're worthy. Like every single person on this planet was born to make an impact on this planet, so you were already worthy. Lesley Logan 0:18  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:57  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the purpose-driven convo I had with Dr Corey Winn in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to it. It's in the lineup, or we'll give you a bunch of spoilers, which will make you go, oh, I need to go. It's like the Cliff Notes. What's that book? What's that app that like, read the books in 15 minutes, and then you could go read them if you wanted. they don't sponsor the show, but it's like that. Brad Crowell 1:22  Yeah, I can't remember what that's called. Lesley Logan 1:28  What people get what I'm saying. It's okay. We don't need to sponsor it. Okay. So today, if you were with us two weeks ago, you've like, now you probably know I am reading this blind. I have no idea. Haha god, I just thought Brad had us do FAFO in sign language, and he just did it. So if you're watching on YouTube, and you know sign language, let us know how you did. So I read these blind. So here we go. Today is May 14th 2026 and it's Bond With Your Dog Day. You know, I actually think this is Bayon's anniversary. They said he was three months old, and so we went back three months and that's February, the 14th, and we're like, great, you're a Valentine's Day baby, like. Brad Crowell 2:14  You might be right. You might be right.Lesley Logan 2:15  Happy 10 years with us Bayon. Okay, so on this day, pet parents and their beloved dogs spend some extra quality time together. Every dog owner can vouch for how affectionate and loyal their dogs are, in almost every case, they are right. However, on Bond With Your Dog Day, it's time to show your beloved friend how much you love and care for them. The day is celebrated with a host of activities and find new ways to connect with your dogs. Happy Bond With Your Dog Day to you and your dogs, and if you don't have one go to a shelter and read to one, spend some time with one. Learn, if you're in Vegas, it's too late to get the dog walking privileges at SPCA until the fall. But like, go do it. I am obsessed with walking dogs at the SPCA. It is so hard for me. It's so hard for me to leave them. I like, have a really hard time. I literally can do three and I have to go because then I start to get really, I'm like, I have to walk all of them if I do anymore. But it really, it, it will bring so much joy to your life. They have so much unconditional love. Some of them are so scared, and they just, they just take some warming up too. And some of them are like, get me out of here. I don't you are amazing. I'm with you.Lesley Logan 3:01  Well, who do we want to feature today? Because I think we should do this. How about Miss Coco? Lesley Logan 3:19  Well, hopefully Miss Coco is not at the SPCA in May 17th babe, because she is there right now. So we can't feature any of them, or Sadie. Love Sadie. Brad Crowell 3:29  We're gonna feature her anyway. Lesley Logan 3:30  Well, yeah, we'll feature them and hope they better be adopted, guys, don't let me I, here's a problem. We are recording this before I go to Europe the day before, and I told Brad, when we come back, if those two girls are still at the shelter, we have to figure out if we can foster them together. I don't know what we're gonna do. We have a retreat coming here. We have eLevate coming here, but like, we gotta get those girls out of out of there.Brad Crowell 3:51  So I'm gonna read her profile. So Miss Coco is a Terrier. She's an American Stafford Terrier, Bulldog. She's an American Bully, and she is like, shorty a little bit squat, and she's so cute.Lesley Logan 4:03  She she's more squat than August was. Brad Crowell 4:05  Yeah, she's almost five years old. She's about 65 pounds, and she is female. She. Hi, I'm Miss Coco. I'm known for my friendly and sweet nature. I love spending time with people, and I'm always ready for a cuddle or playtime. I do need some special care for my skin and allergies, but I promise I'm worth it. I'm looking for a forever home where I can share all my love and joy. I have past experience with other dogs and older kids. Adopting me means gaining a loyal friend who will always be there to brighten your day. Let's make wonderful memories together. And you've walked her.  Lesley Logan 4:29  I mean this girl, I've walked her twice. Walk is a strong word. We went outside, we smelled the roses, and we sat down, and she just got in my lap at all, all those pounds of her, and just wanted me to pet her like she just wants to lay on your couch. So if you're someone who, like, needs a little bit routine in your life, but doesn't really want to commit to, like, long dog walks, like I do, she doesn't want them. She just wants to be on your couch with you. Just wants to be held. And by the way, her skin stuff, I walked her, she's got, like, dried, like, dandruff. Like, it was not a big deal.Brad Crowell 5:04  So like, and I bet, like, with the right, you know, food types.Lesley Logan 5:08  They have her on a special food thing. So I didn't even notice it the second week, a week later. So, like, I think she's great. I also, like, don't be afraid of those older dog. And even if she's not there. Brad Crowell 5:16  She's not very far yet. Lesley Logan 5:17  Look at between four and six, like, a lot of times. Like, she so she's what's called the potty dog. Means she will not pee in her kennel. Will not she will hold it from the time they walk her at the last night for the next morning, that is like, 12 hours, like, so maybe it's a little less than that, but still, like. Brad Crowell 5:39  Well, they close at six and open at six. Lesley Logan 5:39  Yeah, I get yeah. So anyways, yeah. So definitely take a look at her. But I just mean, like, from dogs four to five, there's, like, something special about them. They are out of the puppy stage. They're still very trainable. They still have a lot of life in them. So now, Sadie, can we read Sadie? Brad Crowell 5:50  Only one at a time. We're doing one at a time.Lesley Logan 5:52  Ah, okay. Are we adding this to every show? Brad Crowell 5:54  We might, maybe we will. You tell us if you want us to feature a dog, but. Lesley Logan 5:58  So here's the thing I wonder, like, but if they're not there, will people go and get a different one? Brad Crowell 6:03  Well, here's the reality. We are obviously in Nevada. We're in Las Vegas specifically, and we're specifically talking about dogs that are at the Nevada SPCA. So if that is not applicable to you, which I imagine that's the majority of you, then just look up an SPCA near you.Lesley Logan 6:17  Yeah, they don't take government like the local ones do not take any government funding. They're always locally funded. They're no kill, and they're pristine. How they take care of these dogs, our SPCA has chinchillas, they have a family of chinchillas, there's bunnies. Brad Crowell 6:31  There's like all the things. Lesley Logan 6:33  But you can't. If you can't, if you tell me, I can't have a pet, then guess what you get to be, a volunteer, where you go, and you can literally just sit with you can pick up a pet and just hold it. They have rooms where you can, just, like, play with these animals. And guess what? You can just do it on Fridays. You could do it on Tuesdays, like, you get all the pet love you need. And like, not.Brad Crowell 6:54  Unless he's been walking the dogs in the morning. Once a week, thrice a week, sometimes.Lesley Logan 6:58  I would love to go more, but to be honest, it is, I mean, I work from home, so it is never on the way to anything, but I it means the world to me. And we, if you're an OPC member or you purchase anything at OPC, a percentage of all of our profits goes to our local SPCA. And I used to, we used to try to do international charities. I'm gonna be honest, the money doesn't actually do anything. So we went local, and it's really fun to see how the money makes it go. So here's the other thing, if you have a dog, I can't imagine you don't already bond with your dog, but if you need an excuse to call out sick today, today, here it is, oh, it's I gotta bond with my dog day.Brad Crowell 7:34  All right. Well, here's what's coming up for us. We are quickly filling Lesley's eLevate mentorship program for 2027 at this point, there might only be a few spots left. So if you're interested in what that even is, it's a nine-month Pilates mentorship with Lesley. Go to lesleylogan.co/elevate.Lesley Logan 7:52  Yeah, we actually, just like we came home, did a retreat with our eLevate grads, did the Cadillac weekend for eLevate. So it's been an eLevate season, and it's so fun. And we're currently in the week of spring training. Brad Crowell 7:56  Yeah, it's happening literally right now. Lesley Logan 8:01  And you can still join because the limited replays last for a whole week, so like, there's still time. So go to opc.me/events, because it's great. It's fun. It's fun to be in a community. It's fun to learn one theme when it comes to Pilates. It's fun to see what, what connections you can get. You always have an aha moment with OPC, so you should do it.Brad Crowell 8:23  Yeah. And we're about to announce the summer tour, so get yourself on the waitlist so you can get those tickets. Go to opc.me/tour, opc.me/tour, and we'll be going in August this year. We're going to be going straight across the middle of the country and then looping back through North Texas and then down into a little bit, down into Arizona. Yeah. Anyway, go, go check those out. Come join us. If the tickets aren't announced just yet, they're going to be announced any day now.Lesley Logan 8:48  Just so you know, the spots we're going in August, we're not going in December. That's how it works. Brad Crowell 8:54  Yeah, we're intentionally trying to find new cities along the way, so we'll be in like, places like Knoxville. We never been there before, so I'm excited. Brad Crowell 9:02  Anyway, we had a question this week, and anonymous is asking, I know that you do strength training, Pilates and sometimes yoga. I also do these three modalities, and I also run, but it becomes a lot. I'm trying to find the balance between all of those movement modalities throughout the week, I'm curious if you've got a schedule that works personally for you.Lesley Logan 9:23  So here's the actual schedule. So Sunday mornings, I weight train and do a little Pilates. Mondays, I do some personal Pilates in the morning, but we work out at night. We do weight train at night. Tuesdays, is Pilates, some yoga and some zone two, but they're all separate. I do morning Pilates and yoga, and then zone two in the afternoon. Wednesdays, it's just weight training at night. Thursdays is like Tuesdays, except for it's weight train instead of running. And Fridays is weight training and a little Pilates, like what my body still needs after a whole week. Saturday, I do nothing. I have a whole day of rest. I like Saturday. Sometimes I do a little most of the time, I do a little sauna blanket time. It sounds like a lot. I don't have children so.Brad Crowell 10:13  But effectively, you know, you're doing some intentional movement six days a week. Lesley Logan 10:17  But also, and you should. And the other thing is, is like the way I do Pilates and yoga is not these high intensity cortisol, chaotic things.Brad Crowell 10:26  You're not going to a hot yoga room and sweating yourself to death and all the things. Lesley Logan 10:30  No, sometimes my whoop band doesn't even think I did anything when it comes to yoga, unless I did some like handstand hiccups and my Pilates, it catches it, for sure. But like when I do Pilates Tuesdays and Thursdays, it's a full hour. The rest of the time when I do Pilates, I start with, I just tell myself 15 minutes, and if I have time to if I get more curiosity, I'll do 30. But it's rarely more than 30, so it's so I'm not doing like, three hours of workouts every day. We're talking between 90 minutes and two hours between all of the things I just said each day, and they're spaced out so that I can feel myself, so I can have some energy, so that I can sleep at night, because I'm 43 and sleep is hard for me. So all that, but it, I will also say another caveat to all this is, the only thing that I am creating for myself, workout wise, is the Pilates. Like, that's the only and I use an order because I'm a classical teacher, so like my mat and Reformer, they have an order. And then the rest of the stuff is like, oh, what does my body need? What connections do I need? I am not coming up with my weight training schedule. I am not coming up with my yoga thing. I I do invest in those things. I have a trainer who I can talk to and like, thank God for her, because there's days I don't want to do it, and because I paid for it, I go do it. So I will just say it is a lot. I don't think everyone should do what I do.Brad Crowell 11:45  Let's go back to the actual question. You know, have you found a schedule that works for you personally? Lesley Logan 11:50  Well, yeah, I just yeah, I have, but I was just saying, like, I, I think one of the things you have to do is, first of all, at least one or two cannot be designed by you, like somebody else with that expertise should be doing it. I also don't go to a yoga studio for my yoga. I don't go to a Pilates studio for my Pilates like that, I think also affects the ability for it to be easy. As an ADHD person like I have to drive there, park my car and go do it. Sometimes that's too much. So for me, I do have luxury of doing my yoga is in real time. It's just on Zoom. So I love that. I put I make sure it's in gallery view so I can see everyone. I feel like I'm part of the thing, but I don't have to go anywhere like between class. And my next thing is, I fold my mat up and I move on to the next thing. So I think what I would suggest for this person, anyone else, it's like, what are the things you could do, either at home or at your job. How can you make it so you're not losing time going to things all the time? That's where OPC really helps out. Like, maybe you go to a studio once a week for equipment, but you do mat two or three times at home. Like, how can you make it so or you are at the gym doing your weight training, then you do your mat at the end, right? Because that's a 30-minute or less workout. It's really great. At the end, after weight training, it will, like, open everything up. And if you hate just laying there stretching, it's not that Pilates is stretching, but you get what I mean, like, it's a really good counter balance to it. So my suggestion to you is, like, one, it doesn't have the all or nothing. Two, get experts to design things for you that you're not an expert in. And then three, how can you shave the travel time off on some of these things? Because I don't think that everything has to be an hour all the time, but that's how businesses pay people, and they pay them by the hour. So that's why your sessions are 50 minutes. And that doesn't mean it's necessarily but you need all of those minutes.Brad Crowell 13:37  That's true. Great, great question. Thanks. If you have a question, feel free to reach out on any way you want, but we prefer, beitpod.com/questions where you can leave us both a win or a question. You can also text us 310-905-5534. Stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to start chatting about Dr Corey Winn. Brad Crowell 13:55  All right. Dr Winn is a doctor of physical therapy and with 15 years of experience specializing in wheelchair seating and mobility, drawing from her uncle's experience with spinal cord injury, she founded the Carl Edward Foundation, which is a nonprofit serving people with spinal cord injuries and progressive neurological diseases. In addition to her clinical and nonprofit roles, she runs a women's coaching and consulting practice supporting women as they build their businesses and creating lasting legacies as entrepreneurs, her coaching focuses on helping high achieving women move beyond questioning their value, so they can stop settling for less than what they actually want.Lesley Logan 14:36  So I mean, Corey is a great listen, you guys, because she she's had non-linear like job changes that have put her where she is right now. And I think what we all need to hear is that that's kind of how life goes. We were talking about her like switching from the this full time job that she went to school for for so long and spent so much money to switching to health coaching, which is that led her into actually the coaching that she does today. And she was talking about how, like, if the clients did not feel worthy of taking care of themselves, it didn't matter what plan she gave them, like it did. Like these are already highest achieving, amazing women who know how to do follow a plan, they know how to check boxes, they know how to do, to follow directions, and they couldn't because they just didn't feel worthy of it. And I think that's really eye-opening thing for us to think about, because if you do have like the trainers, or you do have the coaches, or you have invested in the in the guides, but you're not doing the thing it, it may be worth just reviewing. If you feel like you're worthy of the thing that comes from that, you might not be feeling that way yet. So I thought that was really cool what we talked about, because we, I do think a lot of high-achieving women often wonder, like she said, who am I to do that? And it stops their progress. And so we, true success and whatever you want to do requires a mindset shift, where women embody the thoughts and desires and beliefs of who you want to become, right? Like I thought that was a really powerful thing to think about.Brad Crowell 16:02  Yeah. Well, you were also talking about, how did she effectively leave her job right, and then, like, being a doctor and being focused on, like, her specialty, with working with people in wheelchairs, how does she then coach people right? And that's where she was talking about this, you know, mindset, the the second guessing yourself. Right? So she, she was talking about that worthiness, and how do you know? How do you know that you're like, how do we get to the point where we feel worthy? Well, I'm asking you, How do we get to the point where we feel worthy? Lesley Logan 16:38  To be honest, if you're waiting for someone else to say you're worthy. That's the problem. Like, I think everybody's waiting for outside indicators that they are worthy. You actually are born worthy. The fact that you're here is why you're worthy. Like every single person on this planet was born to make an impact on this planet, so you're already worthy. In fact, the problem is a bunch of fucking assholes out in the world who have shown through example that they are unworthy are the ones going out there with so much confidence in a mic that we go, go, oh my god, well, I'm not them, so I'm, no, you're born worthy.Brad Crowell 17:11  You're or they're judging from the sidelines and making people feel not worthy. You know, I think you're right, and also, too, it's funny because you two are mentioning it, you know, the more we're in the room, like coaching with other people and seeing, you know, big businesses, and realizing, oh, they're struggling with similar things that we're struggling with, just on a different scale, or maybe they're in a different point in the journey. But like, we might have this presentation that we have it all together, but we're all still figuring shit out, too, you know.Lesley Logan 17:40  I'll be honest. The who am I to do that is definitely something I resonate with. And then the few times, this many times we've been in rooms with other businesses who, like, flaunt these amazing numbers. Like, oh, our own launch was this many figures. And then you start to realize that the profit after what they spent to get that money is, like, so ridiculous. You're like, so you're making.Lesley Logan 18:01  They spend $1,000 on ads.Lesley Logan 18:02  So, like, I spent only 500 and I, like, made 30, and I'm but you're like, I made six 100,000 but you spent 90, like, I made more money than you. Why am so I remember always thinking, like, having imposters in those rooms. And then after a few of those times here, and I was like, I fucking a better business person than these people. These people just throw money at problems to feel like, to be able to have numbers, they can say at the end to say that they're worthy. But I'm worthy because I'm actually making the impact on a very small budget. And so I think it but that came from me. I had to observe and then like, integrate and like, and almost get a little angry and do that. I think that too many people are waiting for someone to come and deem them ready to be successful, and now you've you've now made it. You've been knighted worthy. No, I think if more, especially women who listen this podcast and the few good men, if more people actually thought they were worthy, we would not be in the muck we are in because too many people who are not worthy are just walking around with confidence.Brad Crowell 18:49  Well, I really loved when she was talking about time being an excuse. And this is this was tough. This one hit home for me, because we have this intention that we like to, you know, that we are going to do something, and then we don't make time for it. And the two of you were talking about the if you want a shopping spree to your favorite store, you would make time for it. You would totally figure it out and make time for it. So when we put it in that kind of context, do we, are we actually making time for the things that we say that we want, or are we making time for the things that we want? Right? So like there's and there's two different things there.Lesley Logan 19:40  Yeah. Well, here's the thing. I'll just give an example, and I, I've been struggling with way to post this on Instagram because I don't want it to come off arrogant. But you guys know me well, so we're gonna talk about it. So in the last two weeks of recording this podcast, so not now. Everything is fine today, but in the last two weeks, we found out multiple different people were using my image and the team had to do extra work to deal with that. Then we had our websites down for five days. All of them, I had to watch 48 20-minute videos and write notes, and then have 26 20-minute calls, it all took 30, on top of all the work I do, the YouTube videos, all the things, you guys, I missed zero workouts, not one, zero. So that's not a flex. It's because those things, the Pilates session, specifically, those those movement practices, they are the reason I can do all this stuff. And so I will, I will never say, oh, I don't have time to go work out. I don't have time for that? No, the other stuff is what I will have to fit in and find time, or find ways to delegate, or figure out if that's a problem I have to deal with right now. But like, I'm not if I were to go, oh, this is a shitty week. The websites are offline. I can't work out because I got to do this. That is terrible, like that, that's too easy. So I do think that if you keep saying I don't have time, enough time, I would definitely look at your schedule, because you're, you're using your time is being spent on something you don't, that doesn't you don't want it to matter so much. Brad Crowell 21:10  Yeah, yeah, or, you know, I think, I think, though, you know, it's tough if you have a family, or like, kids or responsibilities in that way. I understand, I understand that. But there's also, you know, when it comes to that it's important that they understand how you value your time, too, and you you know that is something that can be a learning opportunity for them. Lesley Logan 21:33  Exactly. Amy Ledin, either episode three, no, she was episode five, episode five, and then we've had her on again, I think at least twice. So here's the deal. Actually said actions are caught, not taught. She said it multiple times. She really believes it.Brad Crowell 21:46  Five and 610. Lesley Logan 21:47  If you want your kids off their screens, they can do Pilates with you. If you can go on a family walk, you can't like if they see you practicing prioritization of the things you say matter, that means a lot to them. And I really do think that there is, I mean, obviously infants are a different story, but there and there is things you can do. There's also hopefully, of a partner, we can say, hey, it would mean a lot to me if I could get 20 minutes. You don't need a full hour, 20 minutes to do this thing that I said I wanted to do. These are the things that are really important to me. I need to find, can we sit down with the family calendar and find these times? Like, how can you get the family involved? I really want to write a book, right? So that's not me, but say maybe that's you. Maybe you want to write a book. Maybe you want to work on a thing. Hey guys, it would mean a lot. We had Stephanie at the Mullet Tour. She's like, I'm so jealous of your morning walks. I want to go on a morning walk. I found how old her kids were, and I said, So can't, are they incapable of making their own lunches? Like, yeah, it's a lot. I'm like, why don't you ask them, hey guys, it would mean a lot to me if before lot to me if, before I take you to school, I get to do a morning walk. Next day, next day. She texted me, I'm on my morning walk. They handled it. So I just think that sometimes we, yes, time with when you have kids and other and also, like some women have aging parents that they're also taking care of, time, there's always an excuse for not having time, but sometimes we're we also we get into a habit of not having time, and so we can't get out of that habit of not having time. And maybe you're in a season where you actually could make time for something important to you.Brad Crowell 23:15  Yeah, she, you know she's talking about when we use the excuse that we're blaming a lack of time. We're actually hiding the true obstacle. Now she are just to get underneath the excuse and ask, what? What is the real issue here? Is it fear, right? Is it like, how can we take radical responsibility for our time? How can we, how can we actually like, because otherwise we are being disingenuous with ourselves. We're lying to ourselves effectively, right? Like I am. I'm gonna do this thing and then we don't do this thing. And she said it might involve burning your calendar down and starting over. So she pointed out that people, they use seemingly positive or productive tasks as excuses. Oh my gosh. I just had so much work to do. You know? I didn't get a chance to go to do the thing, whatever the thing is, right? Or I'm planning to plan, or she, she said that maybe you're planning to plan, you know, like, you know, ultimately, but ultimately, making time for what actually matters requires that you take responsibility and stop stalling. You know, do I want to waffle in this, or do I want to move forward?Lesley Logan 24:19  Yeah, yeah. I think I also, I think getting on it all this is also just like saying, like, getting honest with yourself, if you honestly don't have time because you have young kids, you're taking care of, you are a single parent, you're also have an agent. Like, then we have to ask, okay, how do we get the community support? Because that's too much for any person. That's so much, and I'm not saying you have to find five hours, but like, let's how we get some little snacks to fill your cup so you feel worthy, you know, but I think I love burning down a calendar. I love starting over.Lesley Logan 24:49  Well, stick around. We might talk a little bit more about burning down calendars when we get back. Brad Crowell 24:49  All right, finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Dr Corey Wynn? She said, invest in yourself. Invest in a community of other women who are going places that you are also going, and it's important to to make that investment with people who will hold space for your dreams. You know, you were talking about, how do we how do we push pause on family or friends who aren't supportive and, you know, can't get rid of them, but, like, don't really want to get rid of them, but like, definitely they're clearly not the support system. That's where we came in this investing with ourselves. She said, inevitably, you become the reflection of the five people you spend the most time with.Lesley Logan 25:39  That that, I know we all hear that cliche. It's so fucking true. It is the most true thing. Because if you are around people who are wanting to learn and wanting to grow and wanting to think they're even if you don't, aren't contributing to that conversation you are hearing about the things they're doing, it's very inspirational. You can feel your vibes change when you hang out with different people, like I don't even hang out with like, eyores anymore, because, like, I don't even have an eyore in my life. Because, like, you know, so, yeah. Brad Crowell 26:07  Yeah. She said, you must actively and carefully curate your inner circle, you know, surround yourself with people who fill the roles of cheerleader, bruiser, a mentor, a coach, right? And also a mentee. I'm not opposed to a mentee, someone that you can you know, support.Lesley Logan 26:24  Well, that's a plus minus equals that I talk about all the time, and I attribute to someone who we can't figure out when he said it, but. Brad Crowell 26:26  And it doesn't necessarily have to be in person, you know, like virtual communities are something you can be a part of. We recommend OPC.Lesley Logan 26:37  I think OPC is a great one. We have some great, oh my gosh, just like Heidi and Jasmine and some other amazing people, Hope, like Cassie, Laurie can't well, now I'm naming people, I might forget someone, I'm so sorry. Your name was said, but, like, but I'm thinking of these people who, like, they go into the community and they're like, I didn't have time today, and I I'm so proud because I did it, because I am worthy of doing this.Brad Crowell 27:03  Or I did five minutes. Yeah, I love it. Well, what about you? What's your biggest takeaway?Lesley Logan 27:09  So she said, look at your calendar every single morning, ensure that at least one thing scheduled it that brings you joy.Brad Crowell 27:15  Oh, yeah, I really like this.Lesley Logan 27:16  I mean, that is like, if you're like, oh my god, I'm may have to burn my calendar down. Nope. We're just gonna say there should be one thing scheduled that brings you joy. I'm thinking of, oh my god, his name was very interesting. I think I started with a D. He had that 2% situation, which is like. Brad Crowell 27:33  Oh, right, 2% of your day. It's only 30 minutes.Lesley Logan 27:34  Yeah. So, like, 20 minutes of movement, 10 minutes of reading, and five (inaudible). No, it's like dol may del rey karate, del, now you're listening on real time how my brain works. Canadian, 2% 2% of your day. Like, definitely, that was the episode. El. Brad Crowell 27:58  Okay, we found it. Dai Manuel.Lesley Logan 28:01  Dai Manuel I was so close, (inaudible) like. Brad Crowell 28:04  Not even close. Lesley Logan 28:06  Oh my god. Anyways, but he, goal is not episode. Brad Crowell 28:06  185, episode 185. Lesley Logan 28:07  I said it, under 200 episodes. Oh, one. So he talked about the 2% of your day, and he gives you like a Be It Action Item, and I think that that goes in line with like, something that brings you joy, that you're not checklisting, that like actually makes you feel good about yourself. And it can be as small as five minutes, but it has to be something you're looking forward to, something that brings you joy. So maybe, if you don't know what to do, write down a bunch of things you think could bring you joy and give it a try. And she definitely, she said, it might take a little bit time to figure out what that is. So give yourself grace. Grace, Be It babes, Grace. Oh my gosh. We give grace to strangers before we give it to ourselves. So like, please, by all means, give it to yourself. All right, I'm Lesley Logan. Brad Crowell 28:52  And I'm Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 28:52  Thanks so much for joining us today until next time go Be It Till You See It. Brad Crowell 28:53  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 28:53  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 29:36  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 29:41  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 29:46  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 29:53  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 29:56  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Brad Crowell 30:10  Okay, this is episode 608 just kidding. Episode 680 Dr Corey Winn. Lesley Logan 30:18  He's making fun of me now. Brad Crowell 30:20  I was teasing a little bit. All right, here we go.Lesley Logan 30:25  Another making fun of me again.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When was the last time you looked at your calendar and felt joy? Lesley Logan sits down with Dr. Corey Winn — Doctor of Physical Therapy, Peak Performance Strategist, and host of Empower HER Radio — for a candid conversation on why high-achieving women keep stalling on the dreams they actually want. Corey shares why "I don't have time" is rarely the real issue and how to start building a life that actually fits you.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:Recognize when the cost of staying is bigger than the fear of changing.The importance of making decisions from clarity, not from fear.Set boundaries with family who don't share your vision.Why you need to surround yourself with the right five people.How to take responsibility for how you spend your time.Episode References/Links:Empower HER Radio with Dr. Corey Winn (Podcast) – https://beitpod.com/empoweherradioThe Carl Edward Foundation - https://www.thecarledwardfoundation.orgDr. Corey Winn's Website – https://www.coreywinn.comDr. Corey Winn's Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/coreywinndptDr. Corey Winn's LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/coreywinnDr. Corey Winn's YouTube – https://www.youtube.com/@coreywinndptFree discovery call with Dr. Corey Winn – https://www.coreywinn.com/freecallSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsGuest Bio:Dr. Corey Winn is a powerhouse leader, entrepreneur, and philanthropist dedicated to empowering high-achieving women, building lasting legacies, and transforming lives through philanthropy. As a Doctor of Physical Therapy, visionary business coach, and She Sells consultant, she has mastered the art of wealth creation, personal transformation, and high-impact leadership. Dr. Winn partners with SheSells and Super Human Selling to help elite women align their financial success with their soul's purpose, shifting them from burnout to effortless abundance. Through her dynamic coaching, speaking engagements, and consulting, she equips ambitious women with the strategies and confidence to step into their highest earning potential while leading with authenticity and impact. As the founder of The Carl Edward Foundation, Dr. Winn is on a mission to revolutionize support for patients facing spinal cord injuries and progressive neurological diseases. By bridging financial gaps and advocating for greater access to life-changing resources, her foundation provides hope, dignity, and opportunities for a better quality of life. A devoted wife and mother, Dr. Winn exemplifies how family, business, and philanthropy can coexist in perfect harmony. She is passionate about creating generational wealth, empowering women to break through barriers, and leaving a legacy of impact that extends beyond her lifetime. With a rapidly growing global audience, a thriving business, and a foundation making a measurable difference, Dr. Corey Winn is redefining what it means to be a woman of influence, wealth, and service. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! 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I could sit for hours and read. Is that moving the needle forward anything that I do? It might be filling my cup, but it's not moving my business forward. So it's also recognizing it might not be Doom scrolling social media. It might not be binge watching Netflix, it may be like, Oh, I should probably read for 30 minutes rather than two hours.Lesley Logan 0:26  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:05  All right, Be It babe, this one is totally for you. This is for my high-achieving women. This isn't for my women who have lots of things that they're wanting to do and struggling to find the systems to do it. This is for you. If you just want to, like, get a reminder of how to understand who you are, what you want, and how to get there. I'm so excited. Our guest is Dr Corey Winn, dear friend of mine, I've been on her amazing podcast. She's so smart, succinct. I mean, we could have talked for hours, but I also loved how she can get all the great information out in a way that you can use it, understand it, apply it. And I think you're really gonna love this. So here is Dr. Corey Winn. Lesley Logan 1:42  All right, Be It babe, I'm super excited today, because I had the most fun being on today's guest podcast, and we had such a great conversation. I was like, oh, we should just keep talking. So you should just come on over to my podcast. So, Corey Winn, thanks for being here. Can you tell everyone who you are and why you rock so much?Dr Corey Winn 1:58  Yes, I love it. So talking about being it I am, Dr Corey Winn, it took me a very long time to own that, but I am a physical therapist for the past 15 years, and I also have a women's coaching and consulting practice, working with women, building their businesses and leaving legacy as female entrepreneurs. So it's been an incredible journey and road, and here we are. Lesley Logan 2:22  Oh my gosh, yes. And also like, so wait a minute, are you like? Are you still doing physical therapy and you're doing all this stuff?Dr Corey Winn 2:30  I am. I have two very beautiful, but very different lanes, so I specialize in wheelchair seating and mobility. My uncle had a spinal cord injury, so I have a nonprofit that serves that population, and then I have my women's coaching and consulting practice, because I love female entrepreneurs. I'm never bored.Lesley Logan 2:50  That's that's true. And also, like, such different I like to go on lanes because, like, they are such different lanes. Okay, so, like, which came first? Was it the the doctor part, or the coaching part?Dr Corey Winn 3:00  Definitely the doctor part. So I've been a PT for 15 years, doctor of physical therapy. I actually tore my ACL in dance class, surprisingly enough, in high school, and decided I was going to go the PT route. So originally, I wanted to work with ABT or with women's basketball players, because I worked women's basketball in college, and then I found the life of neuro which really didn't surprise me, like I said, my uncle had a spinal cord injury, so I was around him and all of his wheelchairs my entire life, and really just began to love that realm of PT and focus really heavily in outpatient with Parkinson's disease. So that was that lane. But as many women and moms, the typical nine to five or eight to six and weekends and holidays really wasn't working, so pivoted and started my own coaching practice. And I still, like I said, I do PT, but I've worked my schedule around my kiddo in my life, so it's been really fun.Lesley Logan 3:59  That's so good. I love that. I love that well, also, like, we live in a different world now where I think, like, people are kind of used to that. And I always found, like, why is it? Why is everything like nine to five? How do people who are working nine to five get to anywhere? Like, why aren't there people who are like, oh, actually, we're like a, we're like, a 12 to seven kind of place, you know, like, what happened? So I think it's so cool that you get to do that. Okay, so, like, take us back, because, like, it's easy for us to go, like, look at you now, where you have, like, their two lanes, and they're distinct lanes, and they work around your schedule. But like, what was the middle like? What was it like trying to figure out like, I mean, you know, because I know a lot of people will listen to go they're doing something, but they're having this call to another thing. There's fear there. There's a lot of overwhelm. Also, it's not like the easiest thing you just go this is in this compartment, like there's a blend that has happening.Dr Corey Winn 4:48  Oh my gosh, I love that. Well, honestly, the first kind of nudge my daughter was six months old, and as I was getting ready for work one of the many mornings, she crawled across the bathroom floor for. First time. And I was like, oh my gosh, I'm so excited. Couldn't wait to tell her teacher at daycare dropped her off like you'll never guess what she did this morning. And I told her, and she looked at me, just dead panned, and said she did that yesterday, and walked away. And I looked at her, and I said, can you please not tell me those things? And she looked at me just very shocked, and I said, I already know I'm missing so much. Just let me believe. I don't need you to lie. Just let me believe that I thought. Lesley Logan 5:30  Or at the very least they should have told you that she did crawl like they're when you picked her up. Hey, she crawled today. Did you know she does that? Like, agree, since they missed out. They should just been like, oh my god, look at her. Like they should just kept it to themselves. There are white lies for a reason. Dr Corey Winn 5:46  Right. Yeah, same, Yep, absolutely. And I was just so crushed because I was like, oh my gosh, that is just blatantly obvious how much I'm missing. And so then it was like, well, what do I do? I was going to be in this lane. I was going to do this until I retired. I went to school for a long time. What do I do now? This doesn't work with my life. I'd love to say, oh, I pivoted and it was beautiful after that. No, I was scared to death, so I just said, okay, well, I can work, you know, less hours, that's where it started. But then fast forward, years later, I actually started as a health coach, more for my own health than anything else, but as I was coaching these women, I was realizing the issue isn't the program or the nutrition or the exercise plan or the whatever like those things are inherently easy to follow. Most women I work with are very high-achieving. They know how to check boxes. They know how to follow a plan. They can manage all the things, but if they didn't feel worthy of taking care of themselves, it didn't matter. So that was where I really pivoted and said, no, I'm working with women who are badasses, who are going for things and not settling for anything less. Yes, at one point they were burned out. Yes, at one point they were stressed, but now they've said, no, I've had this view, or I've had this product, or I've had this idea that I wanted to do with forever. I'm going for it. So that's how I ended up coaching.Lesley Logan 7:13  Yeah, I think there's like, always, like, a little thank you for taking us on the journey. Because, like, it's not like, you just like, land on the next thing. Like, most of us have little detours along the way, or or building blocks, or going like, oh, I think this is a thing. But it's like, wait a minute, this, this is not their problem. And also, with the way the world is going today, like, anyone can just download a health thing, and also most people, unfortunately, are just going to just get shot. So it's like, okay, great. But then now that you've done that, like, what's the actual root issue of the thing. So can you describe, like, how? Because I imagine, like, I imagine the way you're coaching them is also like, going to be it till you see it kind of way. It's like, there's, there's got to be some sort of acting as if they're ready. So how does that look? What does that look like?Dr Corey Winn 7:59  Well, in so many women, and I'm sure you do this, you, all of us, every high-achieving woman I've ever worked with has questioned their value, questioned their worth, questioned their expertise. Who am I to do that, that, that stopped me for years. So it's one, getting huge clarity on what you want. So often, the women I work with, nobody's asked them what they want for years because they're married, they have kids, they have a job, they're holding all the things together, so it's what you want, and then embodying the thoughts, desires, the beliefs that that woman has, and then creating your life and making decisions along that line, not making decisions from fear.Lesley Logan 8:39  Well, but that's the hardest part, because like, to be honest, usually when you when you figure out their clarity, sometimes I think they know, but they don't want to admit it, because it means, often, like, letting go of something else. Like you had to, like, reduce hours somewhere. You had to, like, let go of the coaching thing. Like, it means almost like we feel that if we stop doing something else, that we're letting people down because they have expectations of us, and we are so used to meeting everyone's expectations and our own. So how does that work? Because, like, that's the hardest part. Dr Corey Winn 9:09  I think for me, it was being really honest with myself and figuring out what it was going to cost me to not do those things. And I don't remember exactly how old my daughter was, probably four or five, but I remember having this horrible sense of failure because my mom did all the things. She was carpool, she worked full time, she was home on the the teacher work days, all the things, and I remember thinking she did it all. Why does this feel so hard. Why can't I figure it out? Lesley Logan 9:43  I think it was hard for them, too. Dr Corey Winn 9:45  At some point, I was like, Corey, you don't have to do it all. And learning to receive help, ask for help. And on the other side of that, it was I want my daughter to know, and my bonus kiddos, who are grown now, they're doing their own thing, but I want them to know that they don't ever have to stay in their lane. They don't have to stay in the box that maybe somebody else made for them, and I don't want them to ever be too afraid to try. So hey, I've tried, I've pivoted, I've done things, and it wasn't always easy, but it was like, what is, what's going to be the cost of me staying here? Is it my sanity? Is it my soul? Is it my happiness? Is it my family?Lesley Logan 10:32  Yeah, I think that's I think that's tough. Like, you almost have to take a piece of paper out and get really clear, like, this is what I want, okay, what does it cost me to not do the thing. I mean, that's what people don't realize, and I don't I, you know, like, it's really funny. I don't even know your mom probably did it really well, but I don't even know if they were doing all the things all very well. But also, we didn't have so many other things to do. Like, there are so many things to do. I'm currently, like, before getting on this call with you, going back and forth, texting a doctor, and they're like, okay, well, that's not a that's, no, it's not an uncommon issue. You have to call around, you know, and do these things. And I'm like, that, people didn't have to do that. Back then you would go, and then it would happen. And maybe it took, they'd say, okay, in two days, it's gonna happen. But like, there was, like, things were slower, and now everything is so fast, and it takes time. And so I think, like, sitting down and getting really clear, like, really clear, like, what is the cost of keeping going with the thing that you don't want to be doing? So how do you exit? Like, what's the kind to just like, the worst place, how I'm really good at exiting is blowing it up. So we're better at that now, better at that now. Dr Corey Winn 11:37  You can turn it all to the ground (inaudible) yeah, you know, for me personally, on the one hand, I'm somebody who would love to just burn it all down. I mean, I'm like, let's go. We're doing this now. And the more fearful maybe, or the more practical version of me is like, oh, we still have bills to pay, and that's reality. You know, some people can burn it all to the ground, and the steps come and and there, and there's nothing wrong with that. What I work with my clients on is what feels good to you, because it doesn't matter what I did if it doesn't feel good in your soul to do it that way. It's not going to be successful. And my biggest goal is to help my clients trust themselves again, trust their process and do what works for them. Some of them, they're like, yep, burning it all to the ground, leaving tomorrow. We're done with that. Some of them are like, I want six months of savings in the bank before I totally pivot and go on this idea. Both are both are fine. Both are right. It's just what feels good to you.Lesley Logan 12:48  Yeah, I agree. Like in my youthful days when it was just rent to pay and no one on my payroll, I could burn it down. And, you know, as as I'm older, a little wiser, and also, like, I care about all the things that I do, I do think some sort of runway and roadmap and plan and based on, like, a value system, right? Like, having these are my values, and so if I follow my values in this change, like, how, how does that change align with those values? Because then it will feel good, you know? Because, like, it's one thing to just like pivot, and it's the other thing to like feel good while you're pivoting. You want to be like, oh, I let those people down. I mean, you still might, but as long as you, like, let them in on the journey, like, that could be the runway. Yeah, I get that. Lesley Logan 13:27  And I think it depends on, like, who it matters whether you let down, if that makes sense. Lesley Logan 13:33  Oh, okay. Dr Corey Winn 13:34  There are people in your life who you don't need permission from. And I don't mean permission, like, yes, you can do that. But like family members who don't believe in you, or friends who are like, oh, what are you doing? Their opinions don't matter. They're not paying your bills. You know, if the people in your life are on board and they're going for it, and they aren't always, I'm very, very lucky. My husband's always like, yes, where are we going? What are we doing? But surrounding yourself with a group of people, whether it's friends or their family, whether it's mentors and coaches who hold that vision for you, and are like, All right, let's go. We're doing it.Lesley Logan 14:11  Yeah, I know that's interesting. Like, I was just having coffee with a girlfriend. I'm like, it can be really difficult to like, I'm a boundaries queen. So like, it's not like, it's that, but like, it is still difficult. There's people who don't in your life who don't want to respect those boundaries, because they're like, this is how I want to operate, and this is how everyone should operate. And it can feel really hard to like, not let those people on the journey. Like, how do you, I don't know, what do you say? How have you coached people who have those family or friends that they're just not able to like, kick to the curb? You know, they don't, they don't, their opinions don't matter. They know that consciously, but also they're still kind of like, having the hard like, how do you put those people in? Like, I don't know. Can we put them in a closet? Like, what do we do?Dr Corey Winn 14:53  You know, honestly, this is a very difficult journey for me, because I have a very large family who has lots of opinions, and I just wanted to fit in. I don't personally have any siblings, so my immediate family is very small, but oh my gosh, cousins, aunts, uncles, everybody has an opinion about how it should go and how it should be. And it took me a very long time to really sit still and listen to my heart and say, Are these people along for the long haul? Are they here to support me, or are they questioning everything that I do, or judging or whatever? And it it was difficult. It was a grieving process to say I love you and I'm not going to allow you to bring me down anymore. And for me, it wasn't even like I had to have a heart to heart conversation. It was just like, I'm not going to allow that energy in my space anymore, but I had to get to a point where I was okay with that, because I I don't speak to a lot of family that doesn't hold those same values, and that was hard growing up with a huge family and cousins and family reunions and all the things, but I realized they're not going where I'm going, and that's okay. They're not bad people. I'm not a bad person. But it was a grieving process, for sure. And so I work with my clients on figuring out where their boundaries are, what works for them, and also letting them give themselves permission to say, I'm not going to have lunch anymore, or I'm not going to call this person when I'm having contrast, because they're not going to help me get out of it. Lesley Logan 16:33  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think lists, guys, I'm hearing a lot of lists, you know, especially until it becomes easier for for us. You know, I also think that, like it sounds like sometimes we need to surround ourselves with better people, maybe not better people, just the right people, I should say, because some people can be great and then the wrong people. What are your tips? Because I feel like a lot of women, especially high-achieving women, it's hard to sometimes have the time to go make friends or like, people who can be in their corner, like it can just feel like they end up doing everything for everybody at some point. So like, what is your best suggestion for that? Because you're gonna need people on your journey.Dr Corey Winn 17:13  Invest in yourself. That's the best thing I have ever done. Invest in a community of other women who are going places that you're going. That's how I met you. I met you through Jessica Papineau. And being around women who hold space for your dreams, who are like grabbing their bag and saying, all right, show me where, let's go, versus really you're gonna do that? Why? And I was actually at Brooke Hemingway's Align event back in January, and Justin, think it's Justin Shank said there's five people who you need to surround yourself with, a cheerleader, a bruiser, a mentor, a coach, and essentially, somebody who's going to always be there for you to have, you know, be your shoulder. And it really hit me, because you are the five people you surround yourself with. So like, I love my parents, but I don't want the same financial set point that they had, so I'm not going to go to them for business advice. That's okay. And I think having that clarity of, like, I'm going to go to this mentor for this thing, or I'm going to surround myself with this type of woman for this thing, and it doesn't have to always be in person. You know, there's a lot of virtual communities you can be a part of, and that was really where it started for me, because there's a lot of networking groups out there that maybe aren't the right room for you. And that's okay.Lesley Logan 18:36  I know, I know I feel like I get invited to a lot of rooms, and I'm always like, so knowing who I am and knowing what I do, I can't be in this room, because I'm gonna have all on the fixing all your stuff, your journey, I will just make like because I won't want to waste my time. And so it's like, I can't, you know, and it's hard, because sometimes I find like, the way I was raised, I kind of feel like I'm letting people down by, like, not taking their invitation. But also, it's like, I can't be in every room, and if the rooms aren't going to be the right place for me, or I feel like the little snake oily salespeople, you know, clicky. I don't like that stuff, so I am kind of allergic to but it takes time to figure out, like, oh, is this group the right group, you know? And then, like, being kind to yourself if you accidentally chose the wrong group because you thought it was the right group, you know?Dr Corey Winn 19:23  Right well. And I think there's something to be said. I think there's a lot of women wounding out there. I think there was a lot of fear for me to walk into rooms with other women of like, am I going to be accepted here? Am I going to be welcomed here? What's it going to be like? And giving yourself grace, like you said, to exit if you need to, or or relax, like I needed to do, and go, okay, this, this is a safe space.Lesley Logan 19:45  Yeah, I'm incredibly grateful that you can like block and bless. You know, it's like, I like, not everyone needs to know you left. I'm the queen of an Irish goodbye, especially when I found out that it was the kindest way to leave a space. It's like, it means that you're it's not about you when you leave, I'm like, I am more obsessed with an Irish goodbye than ever before, because I'm like, oh, it's not about this is not about me. So then you know that I left.Dr Corey Winn 20:08  Yeah, think about I think originally, I feel like I heard you kind of say you want to help everybody. You want to be part of everything. And then you really realize, like, okay, these are not my people. And once you get incredibly clear on who you work with, they flock to you versus, you know, the people who maybe aren't ready or aren't willing to invest in themselves, they exit themselves.Lesley Logan 20:28  Yeah, no, I think it's true. I think there's like people who they find you and they're they're like a magnet to you when you're really clear, because either they're totally ready or they aspire to be ready. And I think that those are the best ones to work with when you're there's, it's like a push versus a pull, right? Like, like, if you're constantly trying to be like, hey, I'm the person, this is the thing. Like, that's really push, you know, forward. That's hard, and it means you sometimes push wrong people into your spaces. But if you if you're a bit more clear, and you own that, and I think that that is one of the kindest things. Like, I had somebody asked me about inclusivity, and I'm a big fan of inclusivity. Of course, everyone should feel like they belong somewhere, but it might not be my space. But it is important for me to know what space, based on what I know about that person might be right for them, so that they find something like, you're a physical therapist specialize in neurological there's any people who come to you who just need, you know, hip stuff. It's like, of course, you're smart, you know how to do it. But like, Are you the best hip person? Probably, like, there's someone better, right? Right. Dr Corey Winn 21:28  Not anymore. Lesley Logan 21:29  Yeah. So, like, so it's like, you it's inclusive to, like, know those spaces and guide people on the other direction as well. I think, yeah. Dr Corey Winn 21:37  Absolutely. Lesley Logan 21:38  Yeah. So what do you what do you say to the person who's like, I get it, I get that I should invest in myself, but they have that, that time. Excuse, I don't have the time. You know, like you had kids and another job and a nonprofit. How do we give ourselves permission to find the time? Dr Corey Winn 21:56  I hope I can get permission from your audience to be incredibly blunt, because I'm going to be, you know, it's what you make time for. I mean, being a very, very radical, taking radical responsibility for your time. I mean, and I this past January, I was like, hmm, this, this time management quote process isn't working for me. It's not building me the way that I want to so taking responsibility for maybe burning your whole calendar down and starting over, but time isn't the real issue. So really getting underneath like, okay, it's not time. What is the real issue? Is it fear? Is it someone else's expectations? What's really behind it? Because time is just an excuse. We all make time for the things that are important to us.Lesley Logan 22:44  Right. It's true. Like, if we were like, you could say, oh, I can't do anything tomorrow. If I would say, oh, but it's I got a free shopping spree to, like, the your favorite store, you would fucking find the time. Like, it's a free shopping spree to your favorite store, you know? So we find, we find the time all the time. So, so it's really about making sure that you're, you're clear on what that is, because, and I get it, like, there are people who have families who need them, you know, for different reasons. You have an infant, you have a young toddler, you have somebody who has a neurological condition going on in their house, there's they're gonna need you. But also there's, there's still other time in your day. And like, how are you spending it? And they're the the phone is a great space that wants to suck all of our time. I find myself wasting time on it all the time. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, like, we can, there's time. And also you'd be surprised. Dr Corey Winn 23:33  You can be wasting time reading a book. Like, I love to read. I could sit for hours and read. Is that moving the needle forward anything that I do? It might be filling my cup, but it's not moving my business forward. So it's also recognizing it might not be doom scrolling social media, it might not be binge watching Netflix. It may be like, oh, I should probably read for 30 minutes rather than two hours.Lesley Logan 23:59  Right, right. So you're still filling your cup. But like, you know, how much are you and what, what does that space look like? I think you're totally right. Like, I think we, like, are like, oh, and I don't doom scroll, I know what this, I still have the time, right, but are you like, still organizing the kitchen, right?Dr Corey Winn 24:13  Or planning to plan to plan to make a plan.Lesley Logan 24:16  Yeah, exactly like, I have people who are like.Dr Corey Winn 24:20  I'm saying that from me. I'm not judging, I'm not pointing fingers. Like that was me, and I had to take radical responsibility for, like, okay, what do I want to waffle in this? Or do I want to move forward?Lesley Logan 24:32  Yeah, and I think that, like, first of all, everyone, like, we say these things in jest, because we spot it, we got it. Like, the reason we can call this out is because we did those things, you know, like, we find ways to I have too much email, so guess what? I found a system that means someone else reads my email. Someone else reads it. I read it's so rare that I respond to an email before it's read by somebody else. Because I'm not I don't go into my regular inbox. I usually go straight into this, like one inbox, where I'm responsible for responding at these things or looking at these things. And I'm telling you, what has given me is I check my email, like, once a week, probably dangerous, because sometimes it's like, my assistants, like you really do need to respond to this one. I'm like, oh, okay, but like, I check it once a week, because, like, it was so hard. I was like, I am stuck between Slack and our, you know, our system that tells me what, what jobs I have to do today, and the email and the text messages, like, I want to talk to my friends too. Like I can't do all the I can't check in all of the platforms all the time. So I check my email like once a week, and I check the Slacks like three days a week. Because honestly, if it's super, super important, someone else is going to call me and go, you have got to respond to this.Dr Corey Winn 25:37  Yes, yeah. We need your input here. Please answer.Lesley Logan 25:40  Yeah. And I think, like, look, if you're brand new at what you're doing and what you're getting into, there is some need to be a bit more available to be reached out, because you're new and you're building your stuff up. I am definitely, you know, my god, 15, 16, years into my coaching business, and, you know, almost 18 years into teaching, like, people will wait 48 hours for a response from me, you know, like, they will so, but I also know that, like, unless what you're doing is brain surgery, and I don't mean that, like, what you're doing is not important, but most things can wait 48 hours for a response. So you can still make time for things and block things out. And as an ADHD person, I thrive in systems. So like you just there, you just have to find the one that works for you. Dr Corey Winn 26:24  Oh, yeah. My calendar, I think would really scare most people, because it's so color-coded and it's so almost minute by minute. But for me, that has given me clarity to complete this task and move on to the next one. Because for somebody who was a physical therapist full time for so many years, a new patient comes in every 45 minutes. You have to have your note done all these things like it was so regimented. And stepping into the entrepreneurial world, you can work all day or none at all. So figuring out the system is important, but know that it can change. There's still no rigid blocks. It's no taking inventory of is this still working for me? Because what you did probably doesn't work, but just look at who Lesley Logan is today.Lesley Logan 27:11  Not at all. And thank God, there's so many new tools out there. Yeah, no, I think that's really important. And thanks for sharing that like it's so color-coded minute by minute. Because I do think some people think some people think that they're weird when it's like that, but I am someone who actually the same way. Like, if I I want to know how long something can take, so I can go, oh, I have time for that. But if it's like, we need this today, and it's like, well, how long will that take? Like, I have to go, is it a 15-minute project? Is it a 20-minute project? Like, you start to learn, like, how long things are, because everything takes the amount of time you give it. It really, really does. And you'd be surprised, like, how quickly some things can get done if you just, you just do it. I think the other thing we're saying, without saying, is like, you need to know yourself and get by the way, by the way, becoming an entrepreneur, entrepreneurial, you'll learn a lot about yourself.Dr Corey Winn 27:55  I would never have identified as somebody who has ADHD, and I'm not diagnosed, but things that bounce around in my head all day. My husband will look at me every so often. He's like, are you going to finish that sentence? Lesley Logan 28:07  No, you did in your head. You did it in your head? Yeah, no. The reality is, I don't think that. I don't know many entrepreneurs that could be neurotypical. I think it's just like a thing that we all find ourselves in because we're doers and our brain thinks so fast and and I had no idea. I thought my husband was the one with ADHD, and I got diagnosed this week that we're recording this, so who knows when y'all are hearing this, but, like, in, but I, like, two years before someone told me that I did that, she's like, oh, your classic case. And I'm like, what are you talking about? Like, I know. And I looked what women and ADHD look like, and I'm like, oh, my whole life I I just thought I was, this is what I told my psychiatrist. I said, well, I thought I was an Aquarius, and so that's why, I mean, I am an Aquarius, but like, I thought, because I'm an Aquarius, that's why I have a lot of things and that I have conversations in my head. And it's like, she laughed out loud, like audibly laughed out loud. She's like, well, you are an Aquarius, but you also have ADHD.Dr Corey Winn 29:06  I'm a Scorpio, but I totally identify with that. Lesley Logan 29:08  You, you have to like, the more you get to know yourself, and it makes it easier for you to figure out, what kind of systems do you need, what kind of team members do you need? Like, I am becoming increasingly aware that, like, I probably need more people on my team that are neurotypical, because I we all can't have ADHD. So I'm glad he has to get things done in a different way. But like, I think when it's coming and it I also think we have to, it's shocking how fast things happen when you take your time. You know what I mean? Like, if we we start to think I should probably it should go faster by now. But it's like, actually, if you take the time to know your values and know your clarity and understand what your fears are and understand what kind of systems you need, you'd be surprised how fast you go. Now, some of you will actually just stick in the in the learning about yourself and the planning to plan and plan to plan, like, like Corey said, but no, you'll learn that about yourself as well, and it really does help. All right, Corey, what are you most excited about right now?Dr Corey Winn 30:08  That's kind of a hard one. There's, like I said earlier, there's two different lanes. So I am launching, like a business building intensive for my community. So anybody who's like brand new entrepreneur just launching like you are my person. Let's get in. Let's sit for a day, either virtually or in person, if you're here in Colorado, and like, map it out, figure it out what systems you need, who you're doing. But then on the other side of that, we're getting to start early this year, but our annual gala for the foundation will be in October, so starting to talk to venues and reach out to people, because today is actually Colorado Disability Advocacy Day.Lesley Logan 30:49  Oh, so you guys just know it today, that day is we're recording, February 12th, so. Dr Corey Winn 30:54  That's true. It's February 12 here in Colorado. So you know there's things going on at the Capitol, there's things going on around town. So like you, I am fiercely protective of inclusive spaces and access and accessibility. So I will likely be doing some talks on that in the coming future to like position groups and whatnot. So lots of things brewing, just lots of excitement going on. Lesley Logan 31:19  I but of course. But you know, what's so funny is, like you say it's two lanes, but now that you brought up advocacy, I just think that, like, because of the work you've done in advocating for that special population you work with, it makes it so much easier for you to, like, tell women that you coach like how to advocate for themselves, like this. It's all the same thing. And if we by the way, if you don't, you don't have to be someone who, like, does talks in front of crowds about advocacy, like advocating for yourself is like, kind of an essential skill set, so that, not just so you can get your dreams to happen, but also so that you you feel seen, and you belong and and you get your needs met. Dr Corey Winn 31:54  Right. Well, and you talked earlier, just about talking to the doctor, you know, I am fiercely protective of women because of the amount of times I've been dismissed at the doctor's office by women physicians. So, you know, being in spaces where I can help other women recognize there's a different room for you and that's okay, or if the door is shut here, there's one open over here, you know, and I do think inherently that is my, my passion is helping people reach their full potential. It's not just women. Yeah.Lesley Logan 32:28  Well, because if the women you help are reaching their full potential, it's a there's like a bubble of influence that happens. So I agree, I agree, and I think that's so it's so key. Oh my gosh. Well, I mean, we could talk for another bit on all of this stuff, but we're gonna take a brief break and then find out how people can find you, follow you and work with you and your Be It Action Items. Lesley Logan 32:48  All right, Corey, where do you hang out? Where do you teach these amazing women to get clarity and advocate for themselves? Where is all where's your fun places to be.Dr Corey Winn 32:57  I love it. Thank you so much. So I'm on Instagram @coreywinndpt, I'm on LinkedIn @coreywinn and if you head to Her Quantum Rise, you can see all the different ways you can work with me, reach out, schedule a free call. I'm happy to just jump on the phone and figure out what you need and how I can help.Lesley Logan 33:17  Perfect. I love that. That's so nice, so nice when people are like, Hey, I'm open and I'm ready. And I think that sometimes people need to know if it's right space for them. You've given us a lot of stuff. So if it but feel free to repeat yourself. But, Be It Action Items, bold, executable, intrinsic or target steps people can take it to be till they see it, what do you have for us? Dr Corey Winn 33:35  Every morning, I want you to look at your calendar and make sure there's something on it that brings you joy. It doesn't matter whether it's five minutes, like Fridays, I typically try and take off and have a whole self-care day. And that doesn't necessarily always mean like bubble bath and other things, but something in your calendar every single day that brings you joy because it allows your productivity to improve. It fills your cup, and it may take a little bit of time to figure out what that is. So give yourself grace.Lesley Logan 34:07  I love that I'm obsessed with morning I really like, I really am and I am also someone who like, if, if I sleep in and my morning routine gets shortened, I'm like, I love it when it's like, I love a three full hour luxurious like getting into my day, but like finding I love that also finding something that brings you joy. So many of us, sometimes there's things on the counter that used to and we like lost our way, so I think that's beautiful. And if you don't have something, that you have to find something. And that's cool. I love this, Lesley Logan 34:34  Corey, you're so amazing. This is so fun. Thank you for being you and y'all how are you going to use these tips in your life? Make sure you tell Corey, tell the Be It Pod, and then share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Because, you know, especially if you're like, oh, I want to do this, and my this person wants to do it, you guys can do the journey together. You can be on it together, and and, and support each other, and, and then you'll, you know, we all like you have the person's five groups. I really think. Like, we all need people who are pluses in our life, equals in our life, and then someone who's behind where we're going, you know, because that lets us know how far we've come, someone who understands the journey we're on, and someone who's who's paved the way. And you can see, like, okay, there is a light at the end of this tunnel. It's not a train. You know?Dr Corey Winn 35:15  The world isn't gonna drop off. You're not gonna fall off the other side. Lesley Logan 35:18  Yeah, exactly. Thanks Craig for being here. All right, everyone. Thanks so much. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 35:25  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 36:07  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 36:12  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 36:17  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 36:24  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 36:27  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this energizing Fuck Yeah Friday episode, Pilates coach and host, Lesley Logan shares why acknowledging progress matters more than waiting for big milestones that may never feel enough. She spotlights incredible listener wins, from leading skilled skydivers to finally surviving nighttime potty-training season, and reveals a personal behind-the-scenes project that's pushing her to think bigger and act bolder.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co .And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.In this episode you will learn about:The eleven quotes that she finds inspiring from Lewis Hatchett.Celebrating skydiving merit badges and nighttime potty training milestones.Finishing a secret project draft without needing external accountability buddies. This week's affirmation to surround yourself with calm peace.Episode References/Links:The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin - https://a.co/d/0g8ujQhjLewis Hatchett Instagram Quotes - https://beitpod.com/lewishatchettSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday. Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:44  All right, Be It babe. How are you? Welcome to another FYF, another Fuck Yeah Friday. It's because we need things like wins in our lives. We need fun times to celebrate the little things that we did and the little things that we're doing. And you'll hear my win, and you'll hear how that's a win in a second that might inspire you to send your wins in to beitpod.com/questions.Lesley Logan 1:07  So I have, I have a thing in all my memberships where you have to celebrate your wins. And if you need a bitch, there is a bitch channel, that you have to go celebrate a win. And I hate when I have to go, oh, this is really terrible. This happened to you. You have to go celebrate a win, because you can't just, like, dump your shit. You gotta go celebrate your win. But on the Be It Pod, we just have wins, right? And inspiring things, and wins, and wins can be small, big, all the things in between, but they're yours, and I love sharing yours. So beitpod.com/questions is where you can send a win in and because it'll come out a couple months after you send it, and then you'll go, oh my god, I can't believe I forgot that I did that thing. I am doing great things. Lesley Logan 1:43  So before we get to your wins, these are 11 quotes that will hit you like a train. Lewis Hatchett, the link will be in this from Instagram. What a blessing to be tired in the pursuit of a challenge of your choosing. What a blessing to be tired in the pursuit of the challenge of your choosing. Yeah, I think we forget that we get to do this. I'm really grateful. Like, in the last couple of years, it's really, I don't get to go, I don't go. Why am I doing this? Because I want, I'm doing all the things I want. Like, I woke up and I'm like, you're doing all the things you want so you better, like, stop being tired. Like, those are, like, things people say around you that you pick up and you're like, oh, I should say, oh, my god, I'm so busy. But like I'm excited. I've got good things going on. Okay? Another one. People may laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at them because they're all the same. I like that one. It's nice. It's a little petty, but I like it. You're doubting yourself while others are terrified of your potential. Boom.Lesley Logan 2:39  Your whole path can be determined by who you surround yourself with. So yes, be selective. We just talked about that in the episode that's coming out with Corey Wynn. So yes, you're getting close. That's why it's getting tough, right? It's always harder at the top of the peak. Look at the way you struggle and tell me you're not strong. Look at the way you struggle and tell me not strong. My goodness, like look at the things that you're having to deal with you, the only way you could do that is if you were a strong person, you wouldn't be given something you can't struggle with, right? An underrated skill in people is the ability to suffer well. It's not going to be smooth sailing, so it's an underrated skill. Thank yourself for having it. You are what you do, not what you say you'll do. You are what you do, not what you say you'll do. Any lesson you refuse to learn will repeat itself until you do. Well, that's true. So true. Vision without execution is just hallucination. Okay, that hits. Mistake that makes you humble is better than an achievement that makes you arrogant. Love those. Love, love, love, love those. You'll hear a couple of these apply to the win I have in just a moment. Lesley Logan 3:57  Now let's get to your win. So we have a couple wins from @amandalgpilates. I led a group of very skilled B-level skydivers all weekend to earn specialized merit badges. That's cool. That's like, I don't even know why they're getting merit badges, but like, I love this. What a fun that's gonna be inspiring. I'll never skydive, but I love that for you. But also, she sent, my kid is officially nighttime potty-trained. We're diaper free house again. You know what, Amanda, that is a fucking huge win. I don't even have kids, and I imagine that that's got to just feel like, like you got to be going, who needs these diapers? Where are these I mean, like, I'm sure, like, so many different things open up in your life. So what a win. Thanks for celebrating with us. I am just so excited for you. I know we have so many listeners who are like, yes, yes, go, Amanda. See, isn't that fun to hear other people's wins? You're like, oh, that's a win. I had a win like that, yeah, and you didn't celebrate it. You got to celebrate it. Lesley Logan 4:43  So my win. So okay, here's the deal. I can't tell you what it is. Some people know, but I've been working on something behind the scenes, something that's been on my mind. I want to say October. So, you know, we're coming, you know, half a year, but I've been working on it, and I'm really proud of where the first draft is, and I'm really excited to take action on it. And it's a win, because I am with my ADHD, like, shiny object syndrome person, and it's really easy for me to say I'm going to do something, and then, like, especially if people don't know I'm going to do it, not that I'm not going to do it, because, like, my four tendencies, the tendency I have, is I'm going to do it, but I could just take a little longer with it. And this is something I did not want to take a long time with. I wanted to get it done in less than nine months, because the people who are going to use it are going to need it. So I'm extremely excited for what this has turned out to, how it's challenged me, and it goes into that like a vision without action is just a hallucination. Like this is not a hallucination. This is going to be something that it's going to challenge me in humongous ways. It's going to make me have to be bigger and bolder and think in a different aspect. And I'm excited for that challenge. So anyways, my win is I'm working on the thing I said I work on without having to have accountability buddies everywhere to get it done. And I'm not saying that you should need that, like some people's tendencies do. Read The Four Tendencies book if you haven't ever done that. But sometimes we don't have at least a deadline. It's hard for all of us to do anything, because there's other things that like take over and this one, nope, this one, this one, this one's sticking, and this one's gonna change people's lives, and I'm super excited about it. Lesley Logan 6:23  Okay, your affirmation. Calm and peace surround me. Calm and peace surround me. Calm and peace surround you, Be It, babe. All right. Thank you so much. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 6:39  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 7:21  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 7:26  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 7:31  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 7:38  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 7:41  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Lesley Logan 7:54  You are what you do, not what you'say you'll do. Any lesson, any lesson.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What if the biggest thing holding you back is waiting for someone else to say yes? In this powerful solo episode, Lesley Logan continues her permission series and unpacks why so many people second-guess their desires, choices, and next moves. She shares how childhood conditioning, perfectionism, and the need for approval keep people stuck far longer than they realize. From Brené Brown permission slips to boundaries, intuition, and radical responsibility, Lesley offers practical ways to trust in your own intuition. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Why asking permission becomes a hidden habit.Lesley's Pilates journey challenged needing approval.How Brené Brown uses written permission slips.Difference between seeking feedback versus validation.Recognize that personal growth involves change.Episode References/Links:The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron - https://a.co/d/02rkqdgrDare to Lead By Brené Brown - https://a.co/d/04SQU1mLEp. 15 with Erika Quest - https://beitpod.com/ep15Ep. 319 with Nikole Mitchell - https://beitpod.com/ep319Ep. 400 Gay Hendricks - https://beitpod.com/ep400Habit Series - https://lesleylogan.co/?s=habitReal Brave & Unstoppable - https://beitpod.com/source1The Art of Giving Yourself Permission - https://beitpod.com/source26 Ways to Give Yourself Permission - https://beitpod.com/source3Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  According to wonder within the path to permission is not an easy one. It's rocky, complicated and cold, and can even be confusing because we have to unlearn and untangle. Lesley Logan 0:10  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:52  Hello, be it, babe. Well, welcome back to our series on permission. On our Tuesday episode. If you missed it, we were talking about like, what is asking for permission? Look like, where does it come from? Why do we do this? I shared some stories. Some of you had sent me some great stories of your own. I love that you're loving that I'm doing this solo episode on this. And please keep sending your questions in your topic requests in, be it pod.com/questions you can also send your wins in there as well. Maybe you have a win that you stopped asking for permission. I'd love to know that. But be it pod.com/questions, is where you can send in all those things. I'm hopeful to have some more different topics. We could do a couple episodes on, just to kind of go deeper on some of these things. I'm hearing our amazing guests give us, BE IT action items on they're like, don't ask permission. Just do it. It's like, well, what the fuck did like you mean, just do it easy. Easy for them to say they weren't raised to put other people's needs before their own. They weren't raised to go, like, to not seek approval from others. They weren't raised to not like, look crazy, right? So they aren't constantly hearing just different things, where people go, oh, you believe she did that? She's so greedy. I mean, they gave, they've they gave the team a locker room on Tuesdays and Thursdays now, they went on Saturdays too? Like, those are things we pick up when we're children and teenagers and young adults. We pick up on these things where people are saying things mostly about women, about when they step outside those traditional roles when they do something against the grain. And I'm not saying you have to go be against the grain. What I am saying is you can't be it till you see it. If you're waiting for someone else's permission to start being it, you have to give it to yourself. But how do we do that? So let me go to my notes, and in my research, I have sources, so we put those in the show notes as well. There's some really great reading in Psychology Today and all these different things, so it's pretty great. Lesley Logan 2:44  Okay, so now we know we are often conditioned to ask for permission, and in the last episode, I do want to highlight, we did talk about the permission gap. We also talked about the signs to close it. So the gap is basically the gap between, like, what we want and what we think people's needs are, and then putting their needs in front of our own. And so we're kind of all and so we're kind of always in the negative for what we need, and then we're asking for permission to give ourselves what those needs are. So, according to Wonder Within, the path to permission is not an easy one. It's rocky, complicated and cold, and can even be confusing because we have to unlearn and untangle. So on Tuesday, I challenged you, I gave you a bunch of different signs, feelings, examples of like, what like, what permission looks like, asking permission looks like. And so hopefully able to explore that and now means we have to unlearn and untangle. If you listen to the series that came out starting in December of 2025 we did a whole habit series we talked about in one of the episodes, all about unraveling a bad habit, and that is in air quotes, and it's really, truly unraveling. It's not breaking it. I was very specific on that, because we do have to unravel. We have to understand, like, what's the prompt? And I will say this unraveling, untangling the habit of asking for permission is advanced habit making, because you have to be aware of yourself asking for permission. It's not the same as I want to build a habit of running around the block in the morning that is very tangible. It's easier for your brain to go, oh, I went around the block this morning, versus catching yourself asking for permission or filling the need to ask for permission, because that's a psychological habit, and you'll have to have that self awareness. So I just want to say it might take longer than you think, okay, but definitely check out that episode. So permission to become to be till you see, it might be the biggest work that we have to do. That's what I believe. After doing all this research, I'm like, oh my God, I feel like I need a permission slip expert. It may include working with a trauma informed therapist, a somatic worker. So even with all the suggestions that I'm about to give you, I want you to understand that if you need extra support, that is okay, okay. It is really, really okay. And I need you to know that it's okay and you're not asking for permission when you hire an expert in trauma or like somatic work or therapy or any kind because. That's actually saying, hi, I need help. That's not you asking for permission, right? Lesley Logan 5:04  Hey, so I told you in the last episode about when I wanted to I thought about becoming a Pilates instructor. Like, I was like, I had this thing, this thought, and I recognize now that I was kind of asking for permission to belong, for permission to fit into the Pilates role. Because, to be honest, at the time, there was not Pilates instructors who did not discover Pilates from dancing. So that felt so weird. Also, I knew I couldn't afford the comprehensive training, so I was gonna start the mat training then save up my money for comprehensive training, which I did a year later. And I remember thinking like, Oh, my God, maybe I can't do it because, like, I can't do the whole thing at the same time. And so I do recall asking for permission, right? I remember being in vintage and basically just saying, Well, tell me what to do. I'll just do whatever you want me to do, which is just me asking for permission so that I can do be the thing that belongs. Because we all want to belong. Sometimes we're just like, hey, just how do I be perfect so I can not get kicked out of this group because we just want to belong. But really, and what they challenged me with is like, Oh no, we're not going to tell you what to do. You're going to figure you've got to feel what you need to do. It's got to be intuitive. It's got to be something that you understand for your body. And oh, my god, that is permission from them to be in my body, which is not something any teacher had given me. All the teachers before had been like, do it like this. You do it like this. And just telling me what to do, and that was kind of my whole life, right, covering perfectious over achiever, lots of people telling me the right thing to do, and just following the checklist and following the path. And so I had a whole adult life. Thank God for Pilates and the curiosity that gave me start going, oh, look at me. Like not checking a box here with a smile on my face. So think about one thing that you have been wanting could be as small as a food craving for today's lunch, or as big as an idea you want to take action on. So you're thinking about it. Got it in your head, what is keeping you from taking the next step?Lesley Logan 6:57  How much permission do you feel you have or don't have. Who decides how much permission you do or don't have? Is it possible that they are irrelevant? In my case, the people that I thought I needed permission from was the world of Pilates, they didn't even know me. They're so irrelevant. They didn't even know me, right? I was giving so much power to a bunch of people I didn't even know existed. So can you give yourself permission? Take a deep breath, right? A deep breath, if you've listened to episode 400 about upper limiting sometimes we get outside of our comfort zone, and then wild things come through worry. Do you feel some worry right now? Worry is a sign of upper limiting to pull you back into your comfort zone, right? Self-deprecating can be so I'll just want to, like go through those questions one more time. So what's something you want to be taking action on or wanting or desiring, no matter how small it is. Okay? So what's keeping you from taking that step or trying that thing or ordering that thing? How much permission do you feel you need you have or don't have for that who decides how much permission you do or don't have, and is it possible that they are relevant. Can you give yourself permission? So Brené Brown gives herself permission slips. It's actually in her book, dare to lead. She said, I give myself permission slips. And they say, I give myself permission to blank. So to make mistakes, to rest. I love this. I think this is a really great way to close that gap and to get rid of the habit of asking for permission is just to give, like literally write yourself permission slips. So if you remember my dear friend Nikole, whose last name is escaping me, sorry, team, she said two episodes, oh my god. Why is it not coming up anyway? So she talked about, in the first episode about all the different post it notes that she put around her house affirmations, and then she'd take them down because people are coming over, because she didn't want any single person to be able to give her any nagging thing that would remove the permission she'd given herself. So maybe you need to put little permission slips everywhere. I give myself permission to try a new outfit today. I give myself permission to make a mistake. I give myself permission to go a different route. I would give myself permission to ask that person for that thing. I give myself permission to rest. I give myself permission to turn off my phone. I give myself permission to not respond. Lesley Logan 9:31  So use clear and powerful language to empower yourself. That's really, really important. Affirmations are really helpful. So this one will start kind of the same way. I give myself permission to be successful. I give myself permission to be authentic. I give myself permission to pursue my dreams, right? So affirmations can also be helpful in also going with what Brené Brown's mission slips are. You can do a meditation. So this meditation is really easy one. You can take your hands, put them on your heart, close your eyes and say, I've got this or you've got this beautiful right, hands on the heart, eyes closed, you've got this beautiful. It's one of Fridays. The episodes I give you as an affirmation, I say it three times. I'm hoping you're saying it out loud with me. I'm giving you a second to do that. I want you to give yourself permission to have that affirmation to be it till you see it. And of course, journaling. Journaling is always a great thing. Look like you'd be surprised what comes out of your head when you journal. I like free writing. If you haven't done the book The Artist's Way, it's 12 weeks of journaling prompts and really will help you peel back the onion of why you're asking for permission in the first place, especially if you go into the book with that in mind, you're going to start to like, answer those questions with those thoughts, and it's going to give you a whole host of information. It's such a great thing to do. You can do it annually. You can do it more often than once, but it's really, really great. I highly recommend it. Lesley Logan 10:59  Okay, so tips for cultivating self-permission. So here's some other tips and tools you can use. So accept 100% responsibility. This is very difficult for some people, because that means responsibility for your own mistakes as well, but acknowledge that you are responsible for your own life, actions and responses. This shifts you from a victim mindset to one of empowerment, removing the blame, shame and guilt game. So what happens when you accept responsibility? It means you cannot you're not asking for cannot. You're not asking permission for people. It also means you can't say, oh, my kids wouldn't let me do Pilates today. Gotta accept 100 responsibility, right, radical responsibility,Lesley Logan 11:31  Another thing. Let go of the need for external approval. Recognize that relying on others for validation can prevent you from trusting your own judgment. I think that's really, really true. I got a medical diagnosis that isn't bad, don't freak out, but it's, it's not great either. And I'm a verbal processor, so I I like to talk about it to kind of, like, understand how I'm feeling, and it's interesting. Like, what I talked about with, like, some people my wife, are like, well, whatever you need, you can recover here. You could do this thing. Brad's like, so you're thinking about doing this. Like, it wasn't, I wasn't asking for permission. I was just, like, talking about it, right? And then I had another friend I was sharing it with, and they were almost talking me out of the thing. I remember going, what the fuck, right? So it made me go, ugh, because I was a little annoyed that she wasn't like, like everybody else. But then I was like, Wait, why do I care what she thinks, right? So it's interesting thing. There's like, just start to recognize when you're relying on the validations of other people and that, and then their lack of validation that causes you to think differently. Now, by the way, it's okay that she has me think differently. It really made me go back and kind of research what she was saying and making sure that, like, I almost got more secure in my decision because of it. So it's also fine to talk things out, but just notice, or maybe what she said could have got me to go, oh, maybe I don't need to do that. Those are all fine things, but just it's a very different thing from getting feedback versus validation. There are two different things. Lesley Logan 12:51  Embrace imperfection and mistakes, so give yourself permission to be human, to be wrong and to learn from what doesn't work. Viewing failures as lessons, not torture, is crucial for growth, and I think this is really, really important. Really important in my journey of just like become a recovering perfectionist and overachiever, it's really helped me to not need permission, because I'm not trying to be perfect to the thing, and I'm allowing myself to learn and ask questions and be a human being who doesn't fail, but actually learns and then makes adjustments along the way. It's kind of like a route right when you're driving, and the map is like, go here. And then it's like, oh, we found a faster route. You didn't go, ugh, MapQuest. You're an asshole. You fucked up the last one. No, you just go, wow, thanks for getting better at what you do. You're just like, look at this app. So great. Like, we don't go, oh, my God, they got it wrong. No, we go, oh, they're like improving every time. Lesley Logan 13:44  Set boundaries. Is vital to give yourself permission to say no to things that don't serve you, even if it makes others uncomfortable, this protects your time and energy for what truly matters to you. Erika Quest, she's been on the pod, we were talking the other day about, like, when people invite us to different things, like, we ask ourselves, is this more, or is it better? But more? Is it better? And if it's just more, then it's probably no, it's better. Gonna make my impact better? Gonna make me a better person? Then, yeah, I'll look into it. Lesley Logan 14:10  Okay, listen to your own intuition. So reconnect with your inner voice and trust your gut feelings. The more you exercise permission muscle, the louder and clearer becomes. I am going to have a whole series on how to listen to your inner voice, so I'm not going to go deeper on that that will be coming up in a few weeks. Hey, be curious, not judgmental. So approach your feelings and experiences with curiosity rather than fear or judgment. Label your emotions to understand them better, which is a gateway to healing and growth. Lesley Logan 14:41  Prioritize self-care and rest. Oh, hi, hello. Give yourself permission to rest, to recharge and enjoy life without guilt. Integrating self-care rituals into your daily routine helps make it a habit. Listen to the habit series so you have even better chance of doing that. But my goodness, you've got to prioritize your self-care so you get rid of that permission gap. And it's not that I'm like, You're not going to help other people or you're not going to care about them. It's just that, like, you can't care about them before your own air mask is on first. Hello. Lesley Logan 15:07  Allow yourself to pivot. Recognize that personal growth involves change. Give yourself permission to change your mind, career or life direction if an old path no longer aligns with your evolving self. I mean, heck, you might have asked for permission to do something and someone talked you out of it, the thing you want to do, and now you're doing the thing that they gave you permission to do. So you're probably going to have to evolve, pivot, change things. And I would say, be nice to yourself. Have grace and space for recognizing that because, my goodness, everything you learn on that path is what's going to make you even better on the path that you're on now. So please be kind. Lesley Logan 15:38  Another way to give yourself permission is, what's the cost of your inaction? What is the cost of doing nothing? What is the cost of not doing the thing you want to do? I want to dive deeper into that, into next week's episode with Dr. Corey. So, definitely be watching out for that interview, because I promise you, it's going to be so good. But I was like, oh my God. Yes, and I'm so glad that we talked about that in her episode. And keep in mind, after years of second guessing, after years of asking permission, for permission, it can be hard to trust yourself and believe you've got this. Lesley Logan 16:10  So consider this permission to be you to be it till you see it. No one but you defines the scope of what's possible, and no one but you can dare to believe that you can be it till you see it. No one but you can define the scope of what's possible, and no one but you can dare to believe that you can be it till you see it. I promise you that you are amazing. You don't need my permission to be it till you see it, but you might need my reminder that you can. And I hope each and every week, you say that to yourself as well. All right, babe, until next time, be it till you see it. Lesley Logan 16:41  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 17:24  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 17:28  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co. Brad Crowell 17:33  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.  Lesley Logan 17:40  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. Brad Crowell 17:45  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you waiting for a green light that's never going to come? This week, Lesley Logan dives into the "permission gap", the space between what you actually want and the action you take, often filled with self-doubt and a perceived need for validation. Whether it's the habit of using a partner as a polite excuse to say no or constantly asking, "Does that make sense?," seeking approval is a cycle that keeps you playing small. Lesley shares how a "mean" sixth-grade teacher taught her about agency and why your language needs an audit. It's time to stop second-guessing and start owning your choices. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:The "badass" lesson Lesley learned from her sixth-grade teacher.Understanding the permission gap and its roots in social conditioning.Spotting "yellow flag" phrases that signal you are seeking approval.How internalized misogyny keeps women from asserting their own agency.Reclaiming power by shifting from "can't afford" to intentional choices.Episode References/Links:The Permission Gap - https://beitpod.com/thepermissiongapWhy Women Need Permission - https://beitpod.com/whywomenneedpermissionPleasure and Permission - https://beitpod.com/right2desireEp. 241 withDr. Celeste Holbrook - https://beitpod.com/ep241Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  If you felt a lot of misogyny surrounding you, you might need to go find some really great women who can show you like you don't need to live under those rules. You don't need permission from men. You don't need anybody's permission except for your own. Lesley Logan 0:13  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.Lesley Logan 0:56  Hey, Be It babe. How are you? Oh my god. Welcome to our week. My solo series is going to be on permission. And this has actually come from some people on my team who were listening to the pod. It's like a permission to be, permission to become, and it made us go, like, so why do we feel like we need permission? Right? What's going on there? So this, today's episode, is going to be on like, why do we feel like we need permission? Especially for my lady listeners out there, and there's a few good men, and I think it's important that you kind of, I think you should listen to this, because I think it's important you might understand, like, why we are the way we are. It just makes you a better human, right? And then on Thursday, instead of a recap episode, it's actually going to be on, how do we stop second guessing ourselves, so that we're we're not needing to ask permission, because we're not second guessing ourselves, right? So in doing this research, I found some really great resources. And so we'll also have links to my sources in the episode show notes. But I just kind of was thinking about this place. So I remember, in the sixth grade, I had a teacher. Her name is Mrs. Scott. She had lots of plans. It was a great was a great classroom. She looked a little scary. I'm not gonna lie, like, who's older? I've been teaching for like, 40 years, by the time I got there and she said, you can't ask can I go to the bathroom with me? In fact, if you ever say can I do something, I'm going to ask you. I don't know, can you? And I remember thinking, like, what a stickler. Why is she so mean? And now, as I was researching this episode, I was like, what a fucking badass she was. Like, how cool that she was making sure that as a sixth grader, we are understanding that we could go to the bathroom on our own. We didn't need to ask permission if we could go to the bathroom, we need to ask permission to leave. Like, the question was actually like, may I go to the bathroom, is what she wanted us to understand. So like, may I do X, Y and Z, because she's like, you are completely capable of doing these things. And so it's really interesting how in our lives, especially as when we learn by looking at people's facial expressions and emotions, the sound in their voice, we're seeking out permission, right? Like, oh, is it safe to be here? Is it safe do these things? Am I safe to do this? And then because of that, it also just starts to roll into all the things that we do on a daily basis. And so we start finding ourselves, like asking permission for a lot of things. And so in the research I was doing, there are some really great anecdotal stories of people in the author's lives who used to be like their parent or role model, and then how that shifted to them asking permission as well. And I just found it really interesting how easy it is for that to become some sort of like, habit's the wrong word, but just like, maybe it's the right word, but just because part of our daily life. And you know, I used to work in retail before, as a Pilates instructor and even as a Pilates instructor I would hear this thing where people would go, mostly women, I need to ask my husband, I need to ask my partner, I need to ask my spouse. And it was interesting, because most of these people were not like housewives who had no job, and this was not their income. And by the way, like it's another conversation. But also, you know, if you are the house manager, you are allowing the person who's making that money to be able to make that money, because you're making their life so much easier. They don't have to do all these things. But that's a different story. But these are women who like brought income in as well. And so it was just really interesting to me. And I will say, whenever I say I need to ask my husband, is because I actually haven't made a decision and or I'm trying to nicely say no to you, but I don't want to say no yet, so I will say I it's a nice phrase to use, but I just remember thinking like, do they have to ask? Is this something they're asking permission for? They really love it. I remember them like loving how they looked in a purse or a necklace, like, just absolutely loving it, and then asking, like, hey, what do you think? And then that person going, I think you can look better in this. And then just, like, not getting the thing they want and getting the other thing. And I just remember going, oh, this is going to not be used, or it's going to be returned, because they really want the other thing, right? And so at any rate, why is this happening? Why are these women mostly asking for permission to be, to like, to desire, to have to own so let's get into it. Lesley Logan 5:08  First, these are some questions that I thought would be fun for you to journal about, post, ponder on this week. What leads me to seek social approval before making a decision? Is it a personality trait? Could it be a lack of self-esteem, or is biology a factor? So I kind of thought that that would be fun for you to think about for your own personal thing, like, do you feel a tendency to seek approval, social approval before making a decision? Is it part of your personality? Do you think it's because you're not sure about trusting yourself, or is it is biology a factor? So there's something that's going to come up in this topic as well, and in the research, it talks about permission gap. And so permission gap is a phenomenon stemming from socialization that emphasizes the caretaking and prioritizing others' needs over personal desires. So basically, we tend to think that we need to ask if we can do something, or before we do something, seek out permission or approval because we believe or feel we should be putting other people's needs before our own needs and our own desires. And so if we're going to do something that could be something that's more for ourselves, prioritizing ourselves first, then we feel like we need permission, like, hey, can I do this thing? I'll say, just before I hit record, Brad and I were redoing the schedule, and we are recording a podcast tomorrow night, when we'd normally be at the gym. And I didn't say, hey, can I go to the gym in the morning? He normally goes to the gym with me on Wednesday nights. Didn't go, hey, can I go in the gym in the morning? I just said, hey, I'm gonna go to the gym in the morning, right? And I was like, that could be taken as rude. I can see how some people would think that is rude. But also, like, he knows that getting my Wednesday workout in is a priority for me. With a very, very busy schedule, there's no other place we can move it. And I hope he knows. I'd love for him to come. But I also know he's not gonna get up at seven in the morning. He's not gonna do it. That's what we do it on Wednesday nights. So I will say I do understand that sometimes some of the things that I say or do can sound a little rude to people on the outside. And so I can understand why sometimes we use permission as a way asking permission as a way to just like, be thoughtful. But I do think it's important to know that you're doing what you're doing, otherwise you are living in this permission gap, this phenomenon stemming from socialization that emphasizes the caretaking and prioritizing of other needs and, others' needs and over our personal desires. So maybe you don't think you need permission, that's also possible. Hopefully that's true. But I also just wanted to bring up some phrases that you might be saying or thinking that could actually be like a, like a, like a yellow flag that you're asking for permission, which is, like, have you ever said, I've always wanted to blank, like, I've always wanted to go on a trip by myself. I've always wanted to learn how to do X, Y and Z. I've always wanted to try that. I've always wanted to buy that. I've always wanted to explore this. I've always wanted to if that is something that you are pondering, then somewhere along the way, you either didn't ask or didn't feel like you had permission to do the thing, right? And sometimes it means, like you just didn't have the time or the money at the time, that that's also true. But like, if you've always wanted to go back and get a doctorate, what is stopping you? Is it social approval? Okay, then we need to look at that. You know. Is it lack of self-esteem? We need to look at that. Is it a biology factor like, or is it like, hey, lack of time and money right now? But also, is it lack of time and money because we're giving it to other people and prioritizing their needs over ours? Is it? Have you ever said I stopped myself because. I stopped myself from buying that thing, from doing that thing, I, from trying that thing, from signing up for that thing. I stopped myself because. You know, I have a lot of friends and family who, I hear them say, like, oh, I was gonna do that, but I didn't because. And it's usually because of somebody else. Someone else was coming to town, someone else was doing this. A lot of people who want to be more consistent in Pilates, but they aren't, because there's always so many things coming up. I mean, like, literally, my schedule is never the same week to week. It is not possible. So I literally had to say to the team between I don't do anything before 9:15 am and I am done with my day at 4:30 you have to fit everything into that, because I need to know that I can before 9:15 and after 4:30 I can do whatever I need to do, right? I need to know that. So it's really, really important that you're just kind of taking notice, do a little audit about what you're saying, about what you're not doing that you didn't do. Now, look, if you didn't want to do it, then don't do it. You don't even need permission from me to do that, right?Lesley Logan 9:39  Or do you ever feel you need someone to tell you it's going to be okay? Like, do you seek support because maybe you think your idea or how you're feeling is crazy? Are you secretly wanting someone to stop you? Like, are you asking permission because actually you are secretly wanting someone to stop you from doing it? Right? So I thought this was really funny when I was like researching for this, so I remember, I can, I can tell you where I was in LA, driving my car when the woman who taught me Pilates, her name is Julie, she's my first Pilates instructor in LA, when she taught me Pilates, I could barely afford it, so I was going every other week for a duet, and then I was doing as much as I could remember, on the mat at home, in between, and eventually I was able to afford a weekly duet, which is very was a challenge for me but I was able to do it, and I had this like inkling, I was like, I wonder, I wonder if I could learn how to teach the mat work, and then I could teach it at her studio, and that could pay for my Pilates sessions. And I remember like, being on a call with her, and she's talking about, like, buying the studio from the other owner, and she's really excited, and like, what that means. And I was like, um, you think, like, it's gonna it'd be okay if I, like, like, taught mat classes? And then she said, oh my god, Lesley, you need to become a teacher, like, but I remember needing at that time, the Lesley at that time, needed permission to become a Pilates instructor, because I honestly thought I was a little bit crazy. Part of me maybe wanted me to for them to talk to stop me, like before, I invested in something I couldn't afford, right? But, like, I definitely was asking permission to belong in the Pilates teaching community at that time, because I went to school for communications, right? So I definitely know that there's parts of my life that was, I was absolutely asking for permission, especially the younger me, especially the way, and I'll tell you, you'll see why, because I'm going to go over some primary reasons why we're asking for permission. But like, you know, obviously, the more comp you get, the more you do things, the less you feel like you need approval from others. And I do think that after 40, like, there are certain fucks that go away. And then I've heard after 50, even you have even less fucks to give. But like, hopefully, right? Hopefully, we have future versions of us that ask for less permission. But I remember that Lesley, I think that was, was in 2007 and I did my first training in 2008 so you know that how old was I then, oh my god, like 25 right? So anyways, like I remember needing needing approval and permission to make that leap. Lesley Logan 12:09  So let's go into some primary reasons why, and just see which ones of these resonate with you. So societal conditioning and gender roles. From a young age, many women are taught to be nurturing and pleasing, often prioritizing family and partners over their own ambitions or needs. The social conditioning makes pursuing more feel selfish or unnatural. This for sure, I'm definitely, I'm the oldest child. I definitely took care of my siblings. I remember one of the times I got in trouble I didn't do one of the chores that I was assigned, but that chore couldn't get done unless my siblings had done their chores. And so because they hadn't done their chores, I couldn't do mine. So I did this other thing that I wanted to do. I read the book. I loved, loved to read. I got in so much trouble because, like, I should have made sure they got their chores done, right? And so just remembering these things when you're a child these different things, it's societal condition. Now, are my parents assholes? No, of course not. They're just being parents, doing the best they can, and making mistakes along the way. But it's interesting how we pick up on things like, oh, well, I better not read for myself next time, because I should be making sure they're doing what they're supposed to be doing. Okay, next example, the good woman, ideal and guilt. There's a lingering cultural narrative that suggests women should be grateful for what they have, leading to the feelings of guilt or shame when they desire more. And this is a really interesting right? Like, you can see it in lots of different things, like the time I'm recording this, you know, I watched the women's hockey team for the Olympics like win gold, and also, by the way, that women's hockey has not been in the Olympics, and since, you know, it's only been there since the 90s, and then since then, like we've medaled so much, medaled as much as the men, in a much shorter period of time, right? And when you look at how women's sports are supported, they're supported United States because of Title IX, which means that money has to be invested in women's sports if there's men's sports. And so it means that, you know, on subconscious levels, like everything that we're wanting is because of somebody else so we should be so grateful. We should be so thankful. And when women do often ask for more, they're often told, like, people label them like terrible things, like she's money hungry, or she's, you know, what is? What they call people who like climb the ladder or like and they take other they seem people as like they're taking people down, but they don't say the same thing about a man doing the same thing, right? So we we learn to be what a good woman is, and should be just grateful that we have that. Another reason why you might be asking for permission is fear of judgment. Women often fear being perceived as demanding, selfish or too much when they vocalize their desires. This stems from a culture that often judges women who step outside traditional roles. 100% I think we could all remember an example of either ourselves or someone we know who did something and somebody said something about them. Sometimes they're often compared to another woman who didn't do that thing. And it's like, well, she didn't do it, and so now they're pinning women against women. And of course, you're like, well, I guess when you compare those two, then she is too selfish. But like, is she? Is she? Do they do that with men? Lesley Logan 15:16  Lack of representation. A lack of role models who are unapologetic about their desires, can make women feel that they need to wait for approval, validation or the right time, the right time. Oh, we just got to wait for the right time. You know, like, no, I don't remember anybody, any male in my life, cousins, brother, being told to, like, wait for the right time. Oh, go get it. Why don't you go get it. Why don't you go talk to them? Why don't you go put yourself out there, right? Oh, Lesley, be careful. You don't want to talk too much. Oh, you don't want to be too loud. Yeah. So this is the permission gap. So this is the space between what a woman wants and what she actually does, often filled with self-doubt and the belief that someone else needs to validate her worth. So, space between what a woman wants and what she actually does. She wants to go back to school, but she stays home to care for everybody, because asking for help or asking for people in her community to take Tuesdays and she'll take Wednesdays. Well, who? Why would she be able to do that? Who is she? Is she selfish? Right? Need for safety and responsiveness. In sexual relational context, women often need to feel safe and emotionally connected to access their desires, because they may not feel comfortable acting on their own. They may wait for a partner to initiate or create the right conditions. So this one I put in there, I just wanted to keep it because permission to be often, when you do research, you'll see that there's a lot of permission to feel worthy, permission to be able to fill their desires. Desires can be sexual, but also you could just desire to have a better life, right? Desire means a lot of different things, but I will say, if you are having any like not having to understand what you truly desire when it comes to sexual needs, please look at our episodes with Dr. Celeste Holbrook and please read her book, especially those who are raised in the church and purity culture being kind, even if your parents weren't super serious about it, there are definitely things we could talk about, and permission to feel desirable if you were at all raised around purity culture in any way. Lesley Logan 17:22  All right, last one or primary reasons why you might feel like you need permission. Internalized misogyny, a patriarchal culture that often devalues female desires, can lead to women minimizing their own needs, which in turn fuels a need for external permission to assert their own agency. I think we all know some women have internalized misogyny. I can think of a bunch of women in our political government right now, and it's annoying, because, okay, well, great, you're a pick me girl, like you're in but you think they're going to care for you. You think they're going to take care of you? No. You think that when you have an idea it's going to be used? No. You're gonna have to push it through some other male, right? So, like, internalized misogyny is something that honestly can happen without your own decision, right? Because it happens because of society. It happens because of the patriarchal culture. And so unless you can get yourself out of that situation, you might not even see what you're doing. And so I highly recommend, if you have you felt a lot of misogyny surrounding you, you might need to go find some really great women who can show you like you don't need to live under those rules. You don't need permission from men. You don't need anybody's permission except for your own. But let's be real, that is harder to do. That's what we're gonna talk about, episode two, we're gonna definitely get into how to stop second guessing yourself, because just saying, okay, here's all these things. This is why it's so hard for us, this is so hard for you to not ask for permission. Doesn't mean you're just be able to ask for, like, stop asking for permission. These are habits you have. These are things you say, like, you automatically will say when something's expensive, say I can't afford that instead of saying, oh, I'm not investing in that right now, that is something I'm really, really proud of, like, how I changed my tune on that, instead of when something was more like, is more money that I have, instead of saying I can't afford that, I'm not investing in that right now, or that's more than I want to invest in that project, or that's more than I want to invest in that thing right now. All of that makes it a choice versus I'm a victim. I can't afford it right now, right? It means I'm not asking for permission to buy something. I'm asking I'm stating why I'm not buying the thing. I don't need the permission. So it takes time. So just being mindful, and I think having the awareness first and foremost, of like, the things that you're saying, the things that you're doing, just take a notice, like, maybe this week, what you're noticing is like, how often am I asking for permission, if I look good, or if this works, or if that makes sense? You know, another thing I've been working on for the last couple of years, because I heard a female CEO say this, she said, instead of saying, does that make sense? Because that's like asking permission. Did I do a good job explaining that to you? She'll say, do you have any clarifying question for me? So that way she is stating, I know I said everything you just say in the right order, in the right way, but do you have any clarifying questions that is giving them the space to ask what they need and take assertiveness, and also you're holding yourself in a space of like, I did a really great job. Oh, your questions are okay. I can see where I missed out on that. We don't need to ask permission. Does that make sense? Right? So that's something I've been really trying to work on. Lesley Logan 20:09  So, all right, here are some other things, other signs that you might be asking for permission. Have you ever talked yourself out of something because someone else might not like it? You might not be liked, it'll be difficult, you have a fear of judgment, fear people will think you're crazy. Definitely, I have asked for permission in my past because I do a lot of weird, crazy stuff, and I'm like, I'm recognizing that, and now people just know I'm a little crazy, so that's fine, but it takes some time to get your confidence up, right? That like it's okay to be crazy. Have you ever talked yourself out of doing something because someone in your life wouldn't approve? You're afraid to look silly. You won't belong. You'll upset someone. The cost, you don't feel worthy. They might say no, so you're saying no first, and then you don't want to fail, right? Fear of failure. Then it sounds like you're in a state where you feel you need permission, and you're in that permission gap. So how do we close it? Well, I think first of all, awareness is important. I think we can't close any gap without actually noticing, like, where is this permission habit coming from? Who do we learn it from? Who do we observe it from? Not to go blame them, but just so you can, kind of, like, take the control back and realize what's going on and just notice that when you're doing it, and also those dear, amazing friends that you have, like, perhaps we need to, like, say, hey, here's what I noticed about myself. I notice that I ask like, what do you think? Instead of asking, like, tell me what your excited thoughts are, and then maybe what are some concerns you have? Like, that would be fine, because now you're asking them to, like, point out pros and cons. But just like, what do you think? Especially because a lot of us as people who never think anything good will happen to us, you know, we have those family members. We've had so many guests on the on the Be It Pod, talk about like, make sure that you're aware of who you're telling your ideas to, right? Because if you're telling your amazing ideas to people who will never believe in something possible, you're going to be, basically asking permission from people who are never going to give it. Just want you to notice what your habits are, what parts of you are feeling that permission need. Yeah, and then on Thursday, we're going to talk about how to close that gap, how to trust yourself, how to give yourself permission. That will be our episode on Thursday. So I'd love to hear how you're liking these topics. If you have topics that you're wanting me to address, you can actually send it into the beitpod.com/questions to say, hey, episode topic, and we'll put in the lineup. We're still gonna have the interviews, we're still gonna have the recaps, but we thought it'd be fun to basically, in between some of these interviews, do some of these solo episodes on some topics that maybe we could just dive a little bit deeper, that sometimes it doesn't happen in an interview because the conversation goes a different way. So thank you so much. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.Lesley Logan 22:57  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 23:40  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 23:45  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 23:49  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 23:56  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 24:00  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Lesley Logan 24:13  So internalized misogyny, a patriarchal cultural, a patriarchal. What a shitty word. I can't even say it. A patriarchal culture that often values. Oh my lord on high. What bloopers? Let's keep them in at the end.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this Friday episode of Be It Till You See It podcast, host and Pilates expert Lesley Logan challenges you to stop seeking external validation and start trusting your inner direction. Whether you are facing a massive business setback or just need a reminder to stay the course. She shares a personal story of navigating a total website blackout without the usual meltdown, proving that your reactions are the truest measure of your growth. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Embracing May birth month inspiration from the Year of the Horse.Celebrating a private Pilates session and its impact on partners.The importance of submitting wins for community mindset support.Celebrating a private Pilates session and its impact on partners.Navigating a business crisis when four websites go offline simultaneously.Episode References/Links:Awakening People Instagram Post - https://beitpod.com/yearofthehorseSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck yeah, Friday.Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:03  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:48  Hey, Be It, babe. How are you? Oh my god, it's the first FYF of May, and it's on May 1st. Hi, welcome, welcome to Be It Pod's, Friday episode. Sure, quick, sweet, hopefully inspirational. Maybe it feels like we're having coffee, although it feels very one sided for you, but I want you to know that I wish you were here chatting with me. I share a win of yours, something inspirational, a win of mine, mantra for your weekend, and hopefully get you excited to hear what else we've had on the pod for the week. And we want to hear from you. We want your wins, so send them in to beitpod.com/questions, that's why you also can send your questions for us to answer on the pod. We love diving a little deeper, also based on your questions, it often lets us know what kind of guests we should have. So the inspiration from the internet, not that it's always very inspirational, but this one, somebody actually did. It's another year of the horse based on your birth month. And since it was the first of May, for those who were born in May, I thought this would be a fun inspiration for you. It's the honestly, the post is way too long for me to read all 12. So what I need you, if you're interested in yours, mine was great. I highly recommend you click the link in our show notes to go read all the posts. But for May, my birth, my may birthday is movement is essential for your growth this year. Changes in environment, routines or mindset bring clarity and renewed energy. The horse strengthens your independence and supports bold personal choices. Waiting for approval no longer feels natural to you. Everything improves when you trust your inner direction. Freedom becomes a source of confidence rather than fear. You will feel lighter as you move in alignment. And your affirmation is, I choose myself and move with confidence. So there you go. I'm gonna keep this one in my saves in case we have another like, seemingly close to the beginning of the month, FYF, because why not? Why not for the year of the horse? The whole time. We'll see I have ADHD. We'll see if I remember. Lesley Logan 2:40  Okay, a win of yours. You guys submitted these. They're so good. So this is from mymarialoisa, Pilates session with Lesley Logan that showed my husband the benefit Pilates. Maria, that was so fun. You guys, Maria came to my house and did a private session. Not very often that people get to get in because it means you're visiting Vegas when I'm home and I have time. And it was so fun to teach her. Fun to teach anyone who's, like, really excited about Joe's work. And like, not just like Pilates, but like, because I want to be a Pilates princess, but like, the actual work of Joe and how it does. And her husband came and he got to see it, and Brad, like, turned him on some things. And so I just think that like that is just going to be I'm so excited for you, Maria. I'm excited for your dreams that you have with it. I can't even wait to be updated on all of it. All right. And I have one more for you. This is from Blanca. I'm not giving up. That's a win. So the reason why I always want you guys to share wins is because I think it's important. One, you need to hear it. It always comes out a couple months after you send it in, just based on when I record these things. So we've talked about this before in FYF, like, when you hear your win, we've had people hear their wins and like, oh my god, I just heard my win, and that's a win, because I needed that reminding. We life is lifing. There's so much going on. And so I just, I just really want to shout you out. I really want to support you. I want to celebrate whatever big or small win you think you have. So thank you, ladies for sending that in. Lesley Logan 4:06  All right now, let me tell you, okay. So here we go. This is the first time I'm able to record since this happened. So this happened a while back, so you have nothing to worry about. But in March, three years after it had happened before, for different reasons, our sites were down. All of our sites, we have four, and they were all down, and means our shorteners didn't work. So if you're using our affiliate links, you couldn't even get to other people's sites with those. If you were you like, like, there's just with you couldn't buy anything, like, nothing. Our members, we were able to provide access to most of their membership, which behind the scenes, which is hard to do extra work, but here's the win. You're like, where's the win? Where's the win. So the win is, is that when my, when our ops girl, told me they were down, I was just, I mean, I said some few choices of cuss words, but no tears, no like, why is this happening to me? No like, oh my god. Where, this is the end of our business. It was just like, okay, step one, do this. Step two, do this. Step three, dadadadada. Let's just move forward. And I get, I got focused on what I had to do that day. You know, I have an amazing team who had to do a lot of extra work, and I'm so grateful for them. And the win is, like, how quickly we were able to pivot and and all these things. But for those of you who are like, I shouldn't be having this happen to me, like I really do, like, remind myself that, like, life is just an old Donkey Kong Mario Brothers game, where each level, you're introduced to a new shitty guy, and then after several levels, you end up at a castle, and then you get to experience all the little shitty guys that you already beat. And you just see like, oh, do I remember? Do I have the skills to beat them again? Because if I didn't, I have a lesson I didn't learn back there. And so I'm just really proud of how, how I was able to react and keep going, because I I had to keep going, but also because I could, because, you know, I figured out how to go, oh, this is the world is not imploding on me. This is a fixable problem. How do we align with our values and then move forward? And I'm just really grateful for all of our members who rolled with it and were patient with everything and enjoy their classes and coaching and replays in all different ways. Thank you. And we're and now, because it happened, our sites are doing even better. They're moving even faster and like, so sometimes they're not even a bad thing. Like, that's a win. So anyways, that's my win, not freaking out and wanting to quit my job. Lesley Logan 6:25  All right, so your mantra for the weekend is, I attract positive opportunities. I attract positive opportunities. Yes, you do. You attract positive opportunities. My love, go have a great weekend. Thanks for being here. Definitely check out our interviews and episodes for this week. We're really proud of what we're putting out. It's because of your recommendations, your suggestions, your wants, and what you're hoping to grow and be it till you see you. So with that said, go Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 6:55  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. Brad Crowell 7:37  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 7:43  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 7:47  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 7:54  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 7:58  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Lesley Logan 8:11  And renewed energy, the horth, the horth, the horse.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When was the last time you made a decision that fit for you? Performance coach and creative business strategist Shari Teigman joins Lesley Logan to pull back the curtain on the chaotic beauty of perimenopause. Shari specializes in helping high-achieving people stop following outdated templates to finally start listening to their own internal rhythm. This episode is a permission slip to stop holding everyone else's baggage, how to move from fear to curiosity, and start making decisions that actually serve the woman you are becoming today. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Navigating the "not this" phase to rediscover your true identity.Why perimenopause is the best time for deep internal decluttering.The "red shoe" analogy for carrying other people's emotional baggage.How to transition from paralyzing fear to productive, playful curiosity.Using internal contradictions to stop lying to your own nervous system.Episode References/Links:Shari Teigman Website - https://shariteigman.comShari Teigman Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/shariteigmanThe Maverick Way: A Field Guide to Coming Undone on Purpose - https://sharidteigman.ac-page.com/TheMaverickWayPrelaunch?test=trueFemGevity - femgevityhealth.comBig Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert - elizabethgilbert.com/books/big-magicTiny Habits by BJ Fogg - tinyhabits.com/bookWhat to Expect When You're Expecting by Heidi Murkoff - https://a.co/d/0j80fU42Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsGuest Bio:Shari Teigman serves as a catalyst for high achievers who are ready to dismantle the status quo and reclaim their individuality. As a performance mentor and strategist, she guides leaders through the process of unlearning rigid structures to make room for radical, creative breakthroughs. Shari is best known for her ability to cut through the noise with a blend of sharp strategic insight and a "Maverick" spirit, encouraging her clients to stop adjusting to external pressures and start building lives that resonate with their core values.Beyond her strategic work, Shari is a dedicated advocate for personal sovereignty, helping global professionals navigate the complex intersection of high-level performance and emotional well-being. By challenging the traditional "resiliency" narrative, she provides the tools necessary to move from a state of constant survival into one of intentional, authentic growth. Whether she is addressing the mental shifts of perimenopause or the hurdles of international business, Shari's mission is to ensure that success never comes at the cost of self-recognition. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Shari Teigman 0:00  In our lives, we walk around carrying everyone else's red shoes and polka dotted bags and pile of crap, and you walk around wheeling it with you, because you call it identity, you call it belonging. You call it your culture, your religion, your family, your blah, blah, blah. And you open up this bag and it's filled with shit you don't know, so you have no room for new stuff.Lesley Logan 0:18  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:57  All right, Be It babe, get ready. Get your notes out if you're driving, Get your ears on. This is an interview I was stoked to have, and I'm even more excited for it to be in your ears right now than I could have imagined. Shari Teigman is our guest today. She is the coach for Mavericks. But really, truly, you high flying women that listen to this podcast who are going through perimenopause, maybe already there may be on the other side, but when I talk about being it until you see it, sometimes you're like, well, who am I? Now? We are going to dive into so many different amazing tools, tats. There's going to be nuggets that are going to just go that hit right where I needed it to. You will relisten to this episode. I know it's great. We did record during Mercury in Retrograde. So there are a couple of times where I think there might be a blip in the audio. I promise you you didn't miss anything. So please bear with the three of those that happen if my team didn't get rid of them and and just know that like the magic is here, and it's very much worth listening to, and relistening to and sharing with a girlfriend of yours who needs to hear it. So here is Shari Teigman. Lesley Logan 2:06  All right, Be It babe. So here's the deal. I have been kind of stalking this woman for a bit through the socials, and when I saw her and what she raves about, I was like, oh, we have to have her on the be it pod. She is exactly what you guys need to hear today and probably repeat this episode. We haven't had it yet, but I have a feeling there's gonna be some nuggets you're gonna want to relisten to. So Shari Teigman, tell everyone who you are and what you rock at. Shari Teigman 2:30  I would say I feel pressure, but I don't. I'm just excited. So thank you for having me. I'm very excited to be here and stalking right back. So I always love finding a friend on the interwebs that sounds and moves like me. Well, you move better than I do, Pilates and all, but the energy, the excitement and the passion for life and a lot of realness as well. So I am a performance coach and a creative business strategist, and I help people unleash the Maverick within them. So it's stopping following everyone else's bullshit templates and moving into a space where you're listening to your own gut, you're following your own rules, and it doesn't mean you're rebelling against anything, and it doesn't mean you have to be angry at everyone. You know the stage of life can come with a little perimenopausal rage, which is always welcome in my world. But I work with both men and women to find a beat of their own drums so that they don't have to be checking in everyone's yards to see what they're doing and measuring themselves non stop. We're not in high school. I didn't do it in high school. I'm certainly not doing it now. So that is the fire that I like to bring to the world.Lesley Logan 3:27  Oh, I love that, and I love how clear you are in what you do. And I'm sure many people's ears perked up on the menopausal race, all that stuff, because I think, like one of the things that so I started doing this podcast years ago, and I'm like, I know who I am and people are trying to figure out why I'm so confident, and really, it's just because I do things scared. But then, like, you know, you start to get past 40, and you're like, why am I freaking out? Well, who? Why am I (inaudible). Shari Teigman 3:52  Fearless me? Lesley Logan 3:54  Yeah, why, why am I hesitating? Like, what? What is happening and and like, in being until I see it, it's like, wow, this is, like, a lifelong thing. Thank goodness I like doing this. But also, but also, like, it is interesting to get to know yourself again when you especially for the women who love the show and who we attract, who thought they did, and now they're like, kind of feeling like my girlfriend said today that she feels like she has, like, sea legs.Shari Teigman 4:20  Yeah, it's so nice of you to call it interesting, to get us to know ourselves, because I have some other choice words for the state of life while I accept it and rage, it's fascinating. And may not get all metaphysical here, and you're going to have to drag me into a crone phase of my life. I don't plan on going lightly or gracefully, but there is the no shits given point where we do get to course correct and say, okay, for those of us who did know ourselves for the past 15, 20, 30 years to check in that that's still what we want, or the identifications are still valid and accurate and have not expired just because everyone else like someone they work for everyone else. So it's a real face to the fire moment of I say I'm all these things. I better check in that I still am because I'm too tired and can't remember anything to pretend I'm something that I'm not. So I think it's a real truth telling phase. And like I said, I'm not planning on getting old and wise, but I will be loud and old and happy, fun. I just got to get through this can't remember my name thing, and then, you know, carry on to the next chapter. Lesley Logan 5:28  The other day, I saw this thing, and the guy was on Instagram, and the guy was like, hey, you meet someone who was born in 1995 and it's, they're 30 years old. And you're like, that's interesting. I'm 30 years old. And then I'm like, weird. And then I was like, wait, oh, I'm not I. I just keep thinking that I am.Shari Teigman 5:45  Yes, my eldest son turned 26 and I am not okay because I'm 22 and I'm not good at math, but that is not math. That is off, all off. Lesley Logan 5:50  So you said we have to, like, check in with ourselves. And I think that that is, like, a brilliant thing that no one has told us to do, right? Like, as you grow up, everyone's like, what do you want to be when you grow up? And then you go to school to be that thing, and you're like, check the box. And I think all the high flyers are good box checkers. Like, check this box and check that box and and so we've checked all the boxes, and then we get to a place, it's like, but how do you check in? Like, you add more boxes. What? What did you do, Shari? Like, how do you check in to see if these are the things you still want?Shari Teigman 6:22  So it's a long answer, Lesley. Lesley Logan 6:24  I'll take it. Shari Teigman 6:27  For me, I have, I have decluttered the boxes many times, because for the first 33 years of my life, I fit very well into the boxes I was supposed to that I was given. And I did a great job, and I was funny about it and zesty about it, and Miss bubbly and head cheerleader and exactly what you think I was like at 18. I still am like at 51 and I went through a really rough divorce in my early 30s as a mom of two kids, and after a couple of years of survival and just knowing what I didn't want, which is a very painful but beautiful process I can say now later, that not knowing what I want, Liz Gilbert had a great I saw her in an interview, and I love her. In my head, she's my best friend, but she just doesn't know it yet. So we'll let her know it's fine. But my bestie, Liz said on this podcast, she went through an era which was called not this. So everything became not this, not this, not this. Most of us think we have to know what we want, and you said it, we're asked when we're younger, what do you want to be? I have no idea what the hell I want to be. I have no idea what the things are my options. So I can pick something off the cereal shelf and not know what's inside. And then, because I said it, I then went to school for it, and then I wore the t-shirt for it, and I told everyone about it, and I posted on social media about it. I can't not do it now. So we wear these costumes for a while, and then they start getting tight and uncomfortable, and not because of the perimenopausal weight. I mean, internally. And then you say, wait, am I allowed to put it down? Is the question I asked myself. So in this, not this phase, at the end of my divorce with these two amazing kids that I love, I then free myself from a situation and I saw black because I had no idea who I was and I had no idea what I wanted. I hadn't gotten up to asking myself that question, probably for the first time in my life at 34. Terrifying, highly don't recommend, but we got here. And so I think at that point, I stripped away everything that I knew and said, well, if none of this was true, what if I could be anything? So hence, the Maverick was born after, I mean, I make it sound really nice, there were a lot of crying on the floor and break down in the therapist's office. And I had had psychiatrists call me scrappy. He's like, you don't need meds, you're scrappy, you'll be fine. I blew up at him, and I don't react to anyone. I was like, I get a reward for being able to constantly be in survival mode. Americans, brace yourself. He refunded me my $250 which does not happen in our country. He was so apologetic that he pissed me off so much he probably got all the rage that everyone in my life until then had not gotten. It was amazing. So the long answer is, I checked in, and all of a sudden nothing felt like me. And while that was scary, it was so liberating, because I didn't have to fit new stuff into an old package. I was like, wee let's just turn the whole thing upside down, and I rebuilt what I wanted and put the right things back in in the drawer, instead of whose is this sock? Like example I always use is, I think the first piece of finding yourself is unpacking. So let's say you go on a girl's weekend with a bunch of friends, and the last night's a little blurry. No one remembers how they got to the airport. You get home, you open your polka dotted suitcase, and there's a red shoe. You don't have a red shoe. You go into the WhatsApp group, you're like, hi, guys, has everyone thrown up yet? Anyone's red shoe? Does this belong to anyone? Of course, you know it's not yours. But in our lives, we walk around carrying everyone else's red shoes and polka dotted bags and pile of crap, and you walk around wheeling it with you, because you call it identity, you call it belonging, you call it your culture, your religion, your family, your blah, blah, blah. And you open up this bag and it's filled with shit you don't know so you have no room for new stuff. So you and I's come into the world with all this passion and all this excitement, and everyone's hands are filled wondering, where do I put one more thing? You have to unpack, and you have to understand why you keep repacking the same thing in order to then get a chance to make any choices.Lesley Logan 10:33  That is an I love that long answer so much because it's like the simple like, the part that we all wanted to hear was like the short answer, oh, just do these three things. Shari Teigman 10:44  I can't do it because I don't believe it. And I used to listen to it and cry and think I was broken because I don't have that availability. So now what do I do? Lesley Logan 10:51  Yeah, and I also like, thank goodness, like, that guy gave that money back. I can't believe there was a guy and he gave his money back. I can't believe it was a man who told you you don't need drugs. But I can't believe apologize (inaudible) because one of the things that like, I it like, is nailed on a chalkboard when someone goes, oh, you're just so resilient. I'm like, I don't want to be resilient anymore.Shari Teigman 11:14  And I hang that one up because I know, and I know you all appreciate it, but it's killing me from the inside, so (inaudible) anymore? Thank you for appreciating it. Lesley Logan 11:25  Right because also, like, of course, as a business owner, as someone who's still, like making the money we need to make till we're retired and living our best life. Resiliency is great in my day to day, like operating my business, but like being resilient in my friendships and my family-ships and all that stuff, it's like, no, because then you don't ever check on me. No one checks on me. Shari Teigman 11:43  And also, we don't know how to ask for help yet then, because it's already uncomfortable and there's no room for it, so you're like, but can I? No, can't, no. Lesley Logan 11:51  Why can't I ask you because I'm holding your red shoe. I can't ask you because I'm holding your red shoe. Shari Teigman 11:56  And I never learned how, so I guess I'm the red shoe holder now.Lesley Logan 12:01  Okay, so, but then, like, so we have to, I love the not this, and I love the unpacking. I think that that is so key. It's, I mean, like, you know, there's something I want to, I want to do in our business, and it requires letting go of some other things. Like, you can't, can't just keep adding to the, you know, it's so then it's unraveling. Like, well, what am I letting go of? And what? What does that look like? And for everyone listening who is freaking out, I'm not letting go of the things that you're paying for, don't worry. It's like, doesn't affect you. It's not affecting you. There's no change affecting you. Okay? It's affecting the people who work (inaudible) I know I'm like, it's affecting, it's affecting the people who work for me. It's not affecting you. You have to stipulate, because people start to freak out, like, so, but thankfully, I understand that right, like the old, the old me would have been like, okay, let's just, let's just, let's just add these, undo that expander zipper and, like, shove, we'll just shove this in. So I love that. I know that about myself now, and I think that that is the real key. But I think, you know, you Shari, got to figure that out kind of in your 30s and so, and like, I find that a lot of people are figuring out in perimenopause, as they're freaking out and don't know themselves, and now they have to unpack. And that's a I find, I still, I feel nervous for that, because is it a hard time to, like, relearn who you are, or is it the best time to relearn how you are?Shari Teigman 13:21  Both. It's hard and the best time. Because as crazy as this sounds, because from a neuroplasticity place, we can't hold on to as much of the story as we did because of the brain fog and the hormones changing, there's a release valve comes. But what's terrifying about it is we never had it before. So the feeling of loss of control is one that makes us want to grip to the old story, my old identity, the things that I achieved in my job before the younger people came in and take it, or technology's changing, or my kids no longer think I'm cool, or I've been with my husband 40 years. I can't even hear him chew anymore. You know, like all the things that we hear from this rage that they don't realize is coming from a lack of tolerance, the tipping point in themselves of what they've made okay for themselves for all these years. So it comes out in a burst, because it's not going to come out any other way. There's not going to be everyone at 2pm everyone open up their computers, scream, and then close it, and we'll all feel better. I mean, I feel like we should start this. The world would be a much better place. But since we don't have it, we wait until everything is chaotic and we hate everything, and then we have to start looking at it. So the kind of stuff I teach, when I teach with FemGevity and with a lot of my private clients, is just starting to ask yourself better questions. Instead of assuming it's only this one category of life, it gives you more permission to be creative. I think if we move from fear to curiosity, we ask better questions, we get better answers. It doesn't mean I'm asking anyone to change anything yet, but when was the last time you made a decision that fit for you? I know it hurts, because even as I teach it, I'm like, brace yourself, girls, because we're going in and I'm going in there with you, oh, my god, I haven't made a decision for myself or I didn't think of my partner, or I didn't think of my team, or I didn't think of my kids, or I didn't think what my family is going to think. I don't know. I don't know the last time I asked myself that. So then I have someone just start with an easy thing. What do you want for dinner? And it's heartbreaking to ask a woman in their 40s and 50s, what she wants for dinner, and she looks at you with a blank look because she doesn't know. She (inaudible) went to what do I have leftovers for the kids, for tomorrow, for school? What can my husband take? What did I get from the supermarket that's about to spoil? I asked what you want for dinner, and then the tears go. What kind of TV do you want to watch? What sheets do you want on the bed? And we're talking professional, high achieving women who just look completely blankly at no one ever taught me to I wouldn't, wasn't allowed to ask a question. There was no space in my high achieving masculine run life and then emotional vulnerability that I have to hide. Who has space for it? So I think if we allow ourselves in this perimenopausal phase to say the exploration can be curious and creative and playful and find community to do it in. You're not crazy or we're all crazy together, and we're just going to figure this out, and there's no right or wrong answer, and no one is taking anything away from you. So it's in sovereignty we get to unpack one whole red shoe for another three years? Go right ahead, girl, no one's pulling the shoe away from you, but if we can slowly untangle the things that hurt us the most limit us the most, a lot of the other stuff sorts itself. It just feels like an emergency because we've never asked ourselves the question. Lesley Logan 16:38  Yeah, it feels like an emergency because I also think like we are so, our brains don't really know how to prioritize different things, so we the red shoe and the leftovers and that big merger you're working on, or whatever it is, they all take up the same priority level in the brain. So that's why they feel like that, right? But I want to highlight something, you said, untangle. And I think that's where a lot of people don't understand that that's such a key word I got to study with BJ Fogg and his and his habits training, and he talks about how to break a habit, which is, you have to, there's no such thing. It's not a stick. You have to unravel it. Because a habit is something that you no longer like, that you do, like a habit.Shari Teigman 17:21  I don't know how to make habits. I'm like, oh, sure, you do. Where's your chocolate habit? Where is your phone scrolling habit? Like you're an epic master at your habits. Everyone needs to be different. Who is it? We're wired.Lesley Logan 17:33  We're wired, you're, it literally is a brain wiring thing. And so untangling those things, and it's true, like when you can figure out, okay, I would like to untangle that I have I don't get to choose what I'm having for dinner. You know, then it becomes, you get to figure out, well, where did it start? Well, actually, maybe everyone you've been thinking about, everybody wants for dinner, and they actually thought you were thinking what you wanted for dinner.Shari Teigman 17:57  And also you're dead on. And it's a more gentle process. It's not like you walk into the family and say, you can all fuck off and make your own food. I want pasta, and they will look at you like, did you bang your head? And then that perimenopausal terror on everyone else's face, receiving the rage is like, oh, wait a second. Can everyone pick a night like they're gentle ways to do this. I actually want everyone else to make some decisions in this house, teenagers then feel empowered. A partner is then included. You get to pick, or guess what, you're allowed to eat something different than everyone else. It's most of these parameters we put on ourselves, and we blame everyone else because we didn't ask.Lesley Logan 18:34  Yeah, yes, no, I'm laughing so hard. Okay, so my husband, he's amazing at doing projects at night. Like, he like, he like, like, the sun goes down, I go to bed, and he is like, you know, he becomes the midnight gardener. Or, like, he puts together something, or, right before I turn this on, he's like, hey, did you see the thing I did in your office? Like, he put all the cords, you know, all the cords, in like, a little sleeve. So, like, it's nice. I know, we love him. Last night, he was doing the same thing he did the same thing he did the night before. The night before, I slept like the dead. I got like a 90% recovery, last night, 1:14 I'm hearing this like It's like drilling, and I am like, did I get up and go, hey, that's I just woke up to that. No. Instead, do you know I did? I sat there for 15 minutes going, when the fuck is it gonna be done? (inaudible) And then I marched down the hall, like, what the fuck are you doing? Shari Teigman 19:28  Why is this a good idea? Lesley Logan 19:31  Why are you doing this? And he's like, I did this last night. I didn't wake up last night. And I was like, well, clears in a different part of my rim cycle. I'm clearly in a different part of my cycle right now.Shari Teigman 19:44  Wind has blown. I am no longer who I was yesterday. You should have known that.Lesley Logan 19:49  Hello, but like, it's this funny thing, because we we do take on so much, and we wait until it's the paramount explosion to say what we're thinking instead of like, I thought, at at the moment I woke up, I thought, what is that noise? And if I had just been inquisitive it could have been, oh, hey, instead of, like, the and then, of course, did I sleep? No, I didn't sleep because I was angry.Shari Teigman 20:10  You weren't finished. You were still processing. You know, it comes like someone doesn't throw out a tissue and the whole house you're on fire just because you didn't say 14 other things because, oh, it's fine. It's fine. It's no longer fine, ladies, it, none is, nothing's fine. So we have to find our voices be kind, and realize we taught everyone else how to treat us so we don't get to be mad at them. We get to teach them what the next version of us needs, and most of us have no idea. So we get to sit down with our children, and we get to sit down with our partners and our friends and our family members, as terrifying as it is, and say there's a new sheriff in town, and I'm just getting to know her, and I need a little grace. And I like I know for my partner, I'm not speaking for him, but I could see the relief on his face when I'll actually say what I'm feeling, instead of him trying to guess which mood I'm in, or I say I have no idea what I need. And he's so relieved, because then he doesn't have to figure it out. Like the people who love us just want us better. Is it over yet? I wish it was over. I don't have cold. I'm just 51 it does. I don't know when it ends.Lesley Logan 21:17  I know that's the fun part. It's like, like, and also, and also, if you care about your heart health, ladies, you want to keep it going for a really long time, so then you better figure out how to talk about what you need and how to manage is the, not the word I want to because I don't like the way that it sounds, but like navigate or dance with all of this change, because once you are on the other side of this and your brain has changed and all the things, then you get to worry about your heart. So I'm just gonna say like you might want to lengthen this out and figure out who you want to be.Shari Teigman 21:54  Also, what an opportunity. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I like to take the funny side of life. If we already feel like shit. Why don't we start unpacking when we already feel like shit? I'm not gonna wait till I feel better to then figure it out. I'll be much more honest with myself if I have frustration. It's like, you know what? I don't want to do that anymore, even though I've done it every Tuesday for the past 20 years. I'm good. I don't want to apologize for it. No is a complete sentence. I don't have to be unkind. But I'm done. I'm done with that task at work. People then learn your new boundaries, and weirdly, they adjust faster than we do. No one else stays up at night worrying about this. Oh, she wants something different, cool. Oh, God, I should have said that 20 years ago. Why didn't I say that 20 years ago? Lesley Logan 22:35  Yeah, yeah. Well, and that's, that is, I think, where a lot of people get stuck. It's like, why, why? And it's like, almost like it's that is worth exploring. And also, in the meantime, just start sticking up for yourself now.Shari Teigman 22:46  Process it later but we'll get to it. And I find a lot of my clients, both men and women, are so terrified to put down what they've been doing, because if they realize that it's much easier to get unstuck than it was to get stuck, they're mortified at how long they tortured themselves, in their mindset, in their performance, in their roles, in what they made true. I could just decide tomorrow not to be stressed about that. Obviously, there's more to it. But then, what do I do with the 20 years of torture that's I have to reconcile that I lost that time, or I gave that away, or I let someone else make decisions for me, it's painful, but we don't have to sit in it, acknowledge it, and say, I'm not going to lose any more days.Lesley Logan 23:28  Yeah, yeah. I guess, like, do they need to I mean, do they need to feel the pain? Do they need to grieve? How do they what is the best way to acknowledge it so that they can, you know, keep going with the new way and be satisfied in that?Shari Teigman 23:41  I love the question, because most people think I can't do that. You have no choice if you want to get there. I believe that equal to the level of joy and fulfillment and peace you want, you have to be willing to go as deep as you want to go high it's we don't get to close off one door and then think, you know the arrow is going to stretch without pulling it back. So I like to call it the glorious end. I can be pissed off and ready. I can be terrified and excited. I can be sad and elated about something. So if I don't allow the emotion, the emotion will sneak up on me when I don't want it, it will come out in the who put the empty cereal box back in the cabinet. It'll come out at work when it should have come out at home and vice versa. It'll come out in too small a new decision, because I don't have the bandwidth to make the real decision I want. Why would we waste more energy? So for me, I tell everyone, men and women, feel it. Punch a pillow. Cry in a pillow, write it out. Burn it out, whatever your ritual needs to be dance it out, bang it out. I'm actually coming out with a journal in a few months that is basically, it's called The Maverick Way: A Field Guide to Coming Undone on Purpose. And every exercise is more ridiculous than the next one. And it's like, the Fuck It Resume is one of them. Like, what are the things you're terrible at? Write it out like we have to tell the truth so we can't. Pretend to only have the highlight reel, and then feel like a human being I am awful at some things, which reminds me of why I'm so good at other things. Then I've got my own way. I don't know what I want. Of course, you don't know. You don't know who you are. You're not willing to say I'm not good at that. Knowing that bothers me. That makes me cry. Am I too much? Okay, am I too little for someone else? Okay. We have to take all of these rules away, feel what we need to feel, and say, I know that might not make may not make you sad, Lesley, but I've been thinking about this for 40 years, and I need to sit in this for a couple of hours and just grieve what I made okay, or mourn what I lost, the conversations I didn't have, the jobs I didn't get, the pain I allowed myself because I didn't want to hurt anyone else, like ow, that hurts, and we get tired of the feeling very quickly when we let it stick it out, when you avoid it, it will chase your ass everywhere and pop up when you don't want it. I am going to grieve, because it's part of my process of making space for something new. I'm unpacking. So I'm unpacking, and I'm understanding. In my unpack, I'm really angry at my third grade teacher because she told me that I couldn't do something, and I believed her for the next 30 years, and she wouldn't even remember who I was. So I already think it. I might as well let myself, let it come up, journal it out, write it on the wall, scream it, throw it, laugh at it. Whatever you need. You get a freedom. There's just a release. As soon as you have release, just like in our bodies, you know, Pilates, yoga, what do you do? Breathe deeper into it so it releases. Grip it. You're all in grip. You know, it's a Chinese finger, that's trapped, it's not getting out. So how do we get out of where we're trapped? We release. We go deeper in, and then we can come out. It sounds scary, but if we don't judge emotions for right or wrong, we'll just feel what I need to feel. I don't need it anymore.Lesley Logan 26:45  Oh, I love this so much. And also, are you gonna do a fuck it retreat? Because you could do a fucking retreat where we could have rooms with pillows and then the smash rooms, and then we could have those, like those phone booths you could just scream in. Shari Teigman 26:57  And then a nap room for all of the exhausted rage.Lesley Logan 27:01  Yes, oh my god, this is like this all. It could just be a fucking space, and people could just be members.Shari Teigman 27:07  Yes, I love this. Every month there's a new way to let it go.Lesley Logan 27:12  I'm in. I interviewed this guy who, like, created these booths for hospitals where, like, nurses or doctors could go in. And I think he said it was just so they could have some peace and quiet, because hospitals are really loud, and all I could think is, like, you could scream in there.Shari Teigman 27:26  I would totally. Are you telling me it's soundproof so you won't know what I'm doing in there? (inaudible)Lesley Logan 27:34  I know. Like, isn't this? I think this, in Vegas, there's a place where you can go and, like, smash things. And I'm like, you can go, like a rage.Shari Teigman 27:40  (inaudible) to one in New York. I think it's the greatest thing I've ever done in my whole life. We did it five years ago. My kids and I are still talking about it. It was so powerful, and it was very meditative. And I never felt stronger in my life. We were running in the streets afterwards, kicking garbage cans, which maybe they should have a restroom afterwards, because we were so amped up.Lesley Logan 28:01  Like, like a waiting area, like a reentry.Shari Teigman 28:05  We're gonna integrate before we let you on the streets of Brooklyn, lady, thanks.Lesley Logan 28:11  Oh, my god, I love that so much. Okay, so obviously, like, you work with these amazing Mavericks, and you do have a lot of experience, and you talk about perimenopause, is there anything that you find in the perimenopause space with women? Because that's we have a lot of and we have, you know, we have a women who are on the other side and enjoy your space, ladies, I hope you're, hope you're having a great time. We'll get this. Shari Teigman 28:30  We're coming as fast as we can.Lesley Logan 28:33  But is there, are there signs and symptoms that people are ignoring? Because I think, like everyone pays attention to the medical ones, the hot flashes or dryness, or my whatever, but like, what about like, the emotional? And that's one of the things I think I tried. There's these, these things that come out in our personalities.Shari Teigman 28:50  I think it's that. It's those days you feel like Jekyll and Hyde, and then you're counting your cycle, and you're wondering, it's not physical, it's the emotional, shorter fuse. Care about less things, because sometimes we're more emotional and other times we're equal amounts of completely numb. So when you feel yourself numbing out, notice when you feel yourself raging about something you didn't care about before. Or I know for me, the lack of control when a brain fog comes in, I'm obviously creative and very cerebral and very verbal, and when I can't remember my name or remember how to say the word pink, I get terrified. I thought I had dementia. I didn't know this was a thing. I was I something's wrong with me, so noticing when you just don't feel like yourself, like I remember when I was pregnant with my first son, I was 24, what the hell was I doing? But okay, I was 24 shouldn't have been allowed to cross the street by myself, and I didn't lose him. He's great. We were figuring things out as we go. But we have these books What to Expect When You're Expecting. Never read them. If you don't have the symptoms that week you think something's wrong, and the last time I checked a woman's body, you and I could be next to each other. We won't have anything that's the same. Why the hell would I follow someone else's blueprint for life, pregnancy, for business, for relationships? I don't want blueprints. I want tear away sheets where I can make it up and then throw it out when I'm done. So if you feel something that isn't you and you're not sure how you feel about it, because some of us like that, all of a sudden I care less or that I can't remember every detail about some gossip someone told me that I don't not interested in. I kind of like that it blows out. So when I started noticing the difference, because I was scared, I only paid attention to the bad things. But when I found out I wasn't dying, I blessedly, didn't have dementia, I'm just lucky enough to graduate to the next video game of mother of womanhood, yay. And the new monsters are coming. I tried to look at, what are the good things? And I do that with all the FemGevity women is, what do you like in the midst of it that I can't juggle as much as I used to? So, I used to be queen multitasker, and I can't do it anymore, and it's okay, and it's actually really nice for my nervous system not to be the master of all at all times, like, I don't have that valve anymore, I can enjoy that, that when I want to be present, I can actually feel more present, because I can't be on as much as I used to be. I care less about a lot of things, so I will speak out for myself, not as much as I'd like to, but much more than I used to, because I can't keep it in anymore. It just comes out of my mouth, like, who, who said that? I would never used to say that. So look at the pros and cons of this. If we're on this roller coaster, instead of just gripping the bar, maybe we could put our hands up once in a while. Maybe we can enjoy the view from at the top of it before we drop. So what are the things that if you could let go of that you've never been able to your whole life? What if this is the opportunity to loosen some of the glue, move some of those joints and let it out anyway, in the wash, because it's going so we don't have to hold everything and new hobbies, things that I haven't made the time for, that my brain can use as new instead of I used to be good at this, and I'm not anymore. What else do I want to try? So I travel a lot for work, so I'm in London for a month, New York for a month, alternating. So I try to let my brain be a different version of me, wherever I am, because I'm jet lagged and exhausted, even if I didn't go anywhere. So it's like, okay, which version is going to be me? So like, I'm in London now, when I go home, I saw a three hour DJ class. I'm not a musician. I know nothing about it, but my brain wants something new to chew on, instead of all the mistakes that I've made and all the things that I can't remember and where did I put my keys? I'm going to go use it for something fun. If there's space in there, because I can't remember anything, I might as well put something good in there. So I think it's the permission to let it flow out of you, good and bad at the same time, and just say you're moving anyway. So you know, when you move house, like, while it's emotional and sad, you find shit you didn't even know was there. So the piles for donation and the clearing out of the 14 mugs you got at someone's Bar Mitzvah that you don't need. Like, it's a great time to let stuff go. We don't have to pack it all and bring it to the next place. So I think if you look at it as a time of decluttering and re-deciding those mental symptoms can be less scary. It's not, oh, I'm gone. No, that version of me doesn't want to be here anymore, because if it did, I'd find a way to keep her.Lesley Logan 33:22  Yeah, yeah. Oh, okay. I'm obsessed with you and all this. And there is the woman who's listening going, okay, well, easy, easy for you to say, you know what? I mean, like, what do you what do you say to the person who's like, kind of, and I'm sure you've met them, they kind of fight to to hold, I mean, we already talked about this, fighting to hold on to the shoes.Shari Teigman 33:42  (inaudible) I am her, so I was the biggest train wreck in this of anybody. I've got two kids in their 20s. My mom, who was my best friend, passed away a year and a half ago. I work internationally, so I never know what time zone I'm in, and then perimenopause hits, and I'm 4'11" and gained about 45 pounds overnight, so I looked like a little blueberry. I didn't like I don't know what. Everything changed at once. And I'm a fighter. The psychiatrist told me I'm scrappy. I still have that personality trait. I don't go down easily. I don't surrender easily, which is why I'm really good at what I do, because I know the resistance. If 17 years ago, me met me now, I would cross the street. I would never go anywhere near me, because I didn't want the help. I didn't think anything was wrong. I couldn't handle the silence of my own mind. I was in survival mode. So like I get it, I want everyone to know they're looking and listening at a version of two women. I don't know your backstory, but I know you do the work. Who do the work? Which means there was a reason we started the work. You're seeing an evolved version of us. I mean, if you want the old me, I'm good, I'll tell you. And you people say to me, why do you tell everyone everything like so they don't put me on some imaginary pedestal. I'm crazier than you. I'm ragier here than you. I have more mood swings than you. I. Work with people, and I don't like them so much most of the time. I love souls. I don't like all the people-y stuffs like, I'm friendly, and then I'm not. I'm an introvert, and then I'm an extrovert. I'm on stage dancing, then I don't want to talk to anyone like I am the whole kaleidoscope. So for all the women thinking, oh, but you've got it figured out, I made it up as I go along, and I make it up every day, and people pay me a lot of money to help them make it up also. So if we make it playful and we make it funny, it's easier to untangle, it's easier to get out of our shackles, because everyone's making it up. Lesley Logan 35:33  Yeah? Well, that's the thing, right? Like, that's the thing you like, discover along your entrepreneurial journey. I'm like, I'm in a room with all these people who are making all this time, like, oh, you just bought ads and (inaudible).Shari Teigman 35:46  And you're crying in the bathroom too, while I wanted to take a selfie with you because I thought you were a guru, I'd rather hug you in the bathroom crying. This is even better. Lesley Logan 35:52  Yeah, yeah. And it's, it's really, it's so true, right? Like, because, like, we're on social media, and people can be like, the the typewriter troll, who's like, oh, easy. It's like, and I have just come to the place where I'm like, I really do like, this phase I'm in. I'm like, no, I was homeless 10 years ago, and I've worked my ass off to do my dream job. (inaudible) Yeah, yeah. So I've worked my ass off. And so you might think I'm this, but I'm gonna tell you right now, I deserve everything that I have right now because I work for it. So don't take that from me and.Shari Teigman 36:16  Go (inaudible) your mother's basement and (inaudible) someone else.Lesley Logan 36:26  Exactly. So, but, like, it's so fun. Like, I'm like, wow, the 10 years ago version be like, oh my god. People think I'm this. Shari Teigman 36:34  An imposter. Yeah, no, I am fully me. Sorry everyone. Lesley Logan 36:37  Yeah, but I do. I'm with you. Like, I also think that a lot of people we do have, we have put on imaginary pedestals, have told us their traumas and their stories, and we only we are like, this is this? You are the Mecca that I need to be, and I'm gonna, I'm gonna do all the things. And so I think it's really easy for us to just forget that stuff. And I appreciate your honesty. And I also think thank you for sharing like for everyone listening, I hope you heard like, you just have to kind of get started and get to know every single day. You can't wait until you feel ready. You're not gonna feel ready. I'm sure, I'm sure Shari's never felt, I don't feel ready. Shari Teigman 37:12  I don't feel ready even when I am ready because I wouldn't even ask myself that question, well, we're doing this then, aren't we?Lesley Logan 37:18  Yeah, yeah. It's true. Yeah. It's so true. Because, like, the one time I I said, okay, people, it was many years ago, but the first time I was teaching like 85 people, and all these people had come to this, the first time this event was happening. So, like, I was so, like, I felt blessed and honored and excited to be invited to this, the inaugural of this thing. And I'm looking at all these people who've, like, wanted to take class with me, and they know what they're doing. And then I'm looking at this front this front row of people who just wanted to support me, but they've never done anything. And I'm like, oh my God. I have people who don't know what they're doing. I have people who have this expectation of me that I don't even know what it is. And my husband was micing me, and I'm like, is the mic on? And he's like, no. And I'm like, I'm actually, like, really nervous, right? Like, I don't think I can do this. Shari Teigman 38:01  I don't even ask if the mic's on. I'm like, I'm gonna ship myself, and it'll be 600 people waiting, and I don't want to go, who gave me this microphone? Who thinks I can do this? And then 20 seconds later, I'm on stage, arm flapping like nothing happened. Like, bring all of it with us. If you weren't scared, you wouldn't have missed the whole thing.Lesley Logan 38:19  Yeah, well, and also, and that's just exactly it. And he just like at me, and he just said, how is this different than what you already do? And I was just like, oh, that's right, thank you. Thank you for the reminder that, like it's, I'm fine, but I think, like it's, it's so important that you all hear like we're every person you put on a pedestal. You hear their story, you're like, oh my god, I'm so inspired. They wake up every day and have to figure out who they are that day, like they all do. Shari Teigman 38:44  The panic in our stomach some days and the anxiety. And I'm not wishing anyone stuff they don't have, but I want you to know everyone has their version of this, and it's not, oh, you're so brave. I didn't have a choice, so I got brave. And some days I'm not brave and but unfortunately, I'm a naturally happy, sad person, so like, I navigate this who are we going to be today? I want to be happy, but I feel sad, but I am happy, but I'm also sad. I stopped trying to pick one or the other. I'm both. I love when I'm on a podcast and like BJ Fogg's sister Linda is a friend of mine. We were in a mastermind together years ago. Lesley Logan 39:20  She lives, she lives in my town. Shari Teigman 39:21  Linda, you're kidding me. I love she's amazing. How funny. What a small world. That's crazy, like I watched the Linda's and the BJs of the world, and it's brilliant, and it's all very organized, and it's strategic, and it makes sense. And then you've got me, who is complete creative chaos. It's the only way I know how to function. You either love it or I terrify you. I'm fine with both. I can't, not going to change. I've tried. This is who I am, and I'll be on a podcast big audience, and they're like so Shari, what are your rituals every morning? And I burst out laughing, because I'm not going to lie to anyone which day, which mood, which temperature. What's it like outside? What am I wearing? I don't know. I wake up every morning I decide what I want to feel. I'll start with a feeling I want connection today. So yes, my days are crazy and scheduled, and I'm blessed to have a very busy coaching practice, and I run a department for a company in a country, in another country like I don't have a lot of flexibility in my time, and I still have to lead with what I need. Otherwise, no one else will get anything from me, and it took me a long time to not go into my own performance mode to help everyone else with their performance. What? I stepped into the same step for wife game that I was in my marriage. Climbed out of that, and I'm like, oh, coach world, green juice, yoga pants, alignment, words, what am I wearing? It's all lovely. If it works for you, that's when the Maverick was born. It's either going to be my way or I can't do it. Stop trying to pick up everyone else's way of fitting into your own life. It won't fit you. So again, it's that curiosity, it's that playfulness, it's the bad mood and good mood mixed together. Then you're being honest.Lesley Logan 40:54  Yeah, it's true. I am. I have three hours every morning for a morning routine, and the very start of my morning routine is the same. I get into a cold plunge. I read three books that are like daily things that I'm hopeful that something sticks, and then I go for a walk. And then after the walk, it's like, okay, what do I want to do? Do I want to do Pilates? Do I want to do my shake plate? Do I want to do my red light? Do I want to have breakfast now or breakfast later? And it has to go with what I'm feeling, which is why I gave myself three hours to do that because I, like you, I, well, I just discovered I have ADHD, which is its own fun thing, to discover perimenopausal. And then you're just like, oh, I'm the one they need to I thought my husband had ADHD. No, I do. And then it's like, wait a minute. So I'm overwhelmed because of the ADHD and. Shari Teigman 41:47  All of it, yeah. Lesley Logan 41:49  Just like, What do you mean? I can't, like, I'm also freaking out about the typing of the fingers because I, like, I just thought that I just had sensory integration disorder. So it's just you have to, excuse me, excuse me. I just wasn't diagnosed as a child and and here we are and now I get to know myself and perimenopause. But I think, like, I love that you share that, because I think that there's a world where you can be in the yoga pants with the green juice and the alignment words, and if it does, yes, and if it doesn't work for you. You can be like Shari and I and you can ask yourself how you want to feel, and give yourself the time to feel that. And I think that that's brilliant, yeah. Shari Teigman 42:27  And then have your green juice, or take a nap or rage or sleep or meditate like it's all wonderful, but none of these things are going to save you from yourself till you know yourself.Lesley Logan 42:34  Yeah, oh my god.Shari Teigman 42:34  It doesn't work. I tried it.Lesley Logan 42:34  I'm obsessed with you. We're gonna take a brief break and find out how people can find you, follow you, work with you, and your Be It Action Items. Lesley Logan 42:44  All right, Shari, where do you hang out? Where will this journal be when it's ready? Where can they stalk you?Shari Teigman 42:55  So I hang out on Instagram. I am there. I am loud. Sometimes I'm consistent. This is my consistency. I'm gone for a week, and then you'll see me 14 stories later. It just depends on the mood. When the mood strikes and the ideas come, the journal will be out, I'm hoping in February, which is extremely exciting. It's being designed now by a chaotic designer, which is perfect for me. And I love making new friends so they can come and come say hi to me on Instagram. It's Shari Teigman. You'll see me with my crazy glasses. As I'm known for a variety of glasses, it only happened because I'm on Zoom all day long, and I get very tired of looking at my face, so I needed to mix it up so that I wouldn't be bored. So I'm saying hi.Lesley Logan 43:39  I just needed some magic to look at. There were signs that I had ADHD. I'm like, let's put stars on your hands.Shari Teigman 43:44  I wouldn't have known it, right? I don't know where it came from. So I'm there. This is what I'm like all the time. I love when someone gets on a call with me, like a sales call, like, oh my god, you're exactly like you are online. Who else could I be? This is enough trouble to maintain you think I'm gonna have another personality for someone else? So I'm exactly like this. No one else answers my messages. I love meeting new people. I'd love to hear what you got from the podcast, what you're working on, what's your Maverick? What do you want to say out loud that you won't say to anyone else, like, I'm here to witness it. Come and play.Lesley Logan 44:17  Gosh. Okay, you have really given us so much already, but we do like our bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps at the end. What do you have for us?Shari Teigman 44:25  So I actually felt long and hard about this, which you should feel special, Lesley. Lesley Logan 44:29  I do. I actually really do. Shari Teigman 44:30  (inaudible) about anything, so I'll think about it and then I'll forget it. So it's not a want to, it's just in and out. So I think, based upon everything we talked about, an easy action step to live this is it's a hard one to say out loud, but it's going to punch everyone in the face, which is why I like it. Clean up the internal contradictions, and it's as simple as you're saying you want a bigger life, but you keep making micro choices. You're lying to your nervous system. You're answering an older version of yourself. You have to understand that the identity that you want for the life that you want is going to require aligned actions to that. So it's as simple as I say, I want to do Pilates every day, and yet I find myself laying on the couch. Pilates isn't happening. I did it today. I am tired from jet lag. I'm a yoga person. I love it, and I haven't done it so I could tell you, I love yoga, but I haven't done it in six weeks. I didn't realize till I said, when's the last time I took my mat out? Oh my god, I would have told you I did it a few days ago. Perimenopausal brain, I thought I did. So, telling ourselves the truth and cleaning up the internal contradictions makes us stop looking for answers from the outside of like, how come I just can't do it because you're not telling yourself the truth. So if I choose to lay on the couch, maybe I needed it that day. Maybe I didn't realize that that's what I wanted. Like, if I decide to stay on the couch, I do it intentionally. If I decide to do the yoga I don't check my phone in between, like, choose whatever it is intentionally and clean up those internal contradictions. The questions you ask will be much more clear and much more honest, and then you'll get to some answers.Lesley Logan 46:07  It is a good punch in the face, and I really like it. Shari Teigman 46:09  I punch myself in the face with it too. I'm like, oh god, if I say it out loud, I then have to do it.Lesley Logan 46:17  I it's so true, and it's really it's really funny. We get smart like, then I'll just keep it to myself, but.Shari Teigman 46:23  Not gonna unleash that one. Are we? Lesley Logan 46:25  No, I'm like, I won't tell anyone, and then they won't know. Shari Teigman 46:29  Let me know how it goes. Lesley Logan 46:31  Yeah. Oh, that one is so good. I'm so glad to have you. I mean, we're gonna have to have you back. I can't believe we haven't crossed paths, because I feel like you are just a dear friend in my life already. You guys, I agree with Shari. What touched you, what made you think like, what? Where did you go, oh, fuck it, Shari. Can't believe you called me out. She wants to know. I want to know. So tag her. Tag the Be It Pod. Share this with a girlfriend who needs to hear it like cheer for the scrappy front of the resilient friend, because I know that they need to feel so seen, and you know what to do. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. Lesley Logan 47:03  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 47:46  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 47:51  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 47:55  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 48:02  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 48:05  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you wheeling around a pile of emotional baggage you've mistakenly labeled as your identity? In this recap episode, Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell dive into the transformative insights shared by Shari Teigman, a dynamic performance coach and creative business strategist who specializes in guiding high achievers through major life transitions. Shari reveals why coming undone is the prerequisite for authenticity, especially for those navigating midlife identity shifts. The hosts break down the red shoes metaphor, the necessity of active emotional release, and why joy requires going massively deep internally. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:How to unpack other people's baggage to reclaim your own identity. The grieving process is an important part of unpacking to feel joy. Learn how Swedish death cleaning prevents leaving baggage for others.Why it's important to acknowledge your emotions as neither good nor bad. Clean up internal contradictions and choose intentional actions over excuses.Episode References/Links:eLevate Mentorship Program - lesleylogan.co/elevateOPC Spring Training - opc.me/eventsOPC Summer Tour - opc.me/tourContrology Spine Corrector - opc.me/spinecorrectorSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questionsShari Teigman Website - https://shariteigman.comShari Teigman Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/shariteigmanThe Maverick Way - https://beitpod.com/themaverickwayThe Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning - https://a.co/d/06TuBmbwEp. 589 ft. Brad Bizjack - https://beitpod.com/ep589Ep. 183 with Dr. Bender episode - https://beitpod.com/ep183 If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  So you ultimately have to understand why you keep repacking the same thing in order to finally get a chance to make any real choices. So I love this because, like, I feel like some people think that they're self-sabotaging, or they're in the same spiral, and it's like, yeah, but you kept packing the same stuff, expecting a new result. Brad Crowell 0:18  Or you're carrying around the old shit. Lesley Logan 0:19  Yes but and you just keep repacking the old shit, and that's why you don't get anything new. Lesley Logan 0:25  Welcome to the be it till you see it, podcast where we talk about taking messy action knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan Pilate instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained 1000s of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it till you see it. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:07  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the unraveling convo I had with Shari Teigman in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, you can pause this one and then listen to that one, or you can listen to this one here. We have to say we've got some fun stuff to talk about, and then go listen that one. But you cannot miss it.Brad Crowell 1:25  It's an epic episode. Lesley Logan 1:26  I want to be friends with her. Brad Crowell 1:27  Yeah, she's badass.Lesley Logan 1:29  I do. We should tell her, when we're in London, I don't like I really. Brad Crowell 1:32  We should tell her when we're in London. Lesley Logan 1:33  I don't know how we're gonna fit in another meal, but like, she can meet me for I don't know. She's great. Anyway.,Brad Crowell 1:39  She might be in New York. She lives between the two. Lesley Logan 1:42  She does live between the two. You know what? Then, if she doesn't at least we reached out. But, you know, at least we reached out. The sign that you have ADHD is that you want to hang out with someone, and then you hope that they're not available. Lesley Logan 1:53  Okay, today, while you guys are listening to this is April 30th 2026 and today we're bringing awareness to two things. Brad Crowell 2:00  Two things. Lesley Logan 2:01  So Walpurgis night. Brad Crowell 2:03  Walpurgis night.Lesley Logan 2:03  The Mass of St. Walpurgis Night or Walpurgis Night, is observed on April 30th in parts of northern and eastern Europe, from Sweden to the Czech Republic. It is known as Walpurgis in German speaking nations, Valborg in Sweden and Čarodejnice. Brad Crowell 2:20  Good job. I'm really impressed. Lesley Logan 2:22  There's a J and an N connected to each other. Brad Crowell 2:24  Čarodejnice. Lesley Logan 2:26  Čarodejnice because there's an E in there too. In the Czech Republic.Brad Crowell 2:29  We butchered the hell out of that. So if you don't know how to say it, send us a voicemail, send us a DM.Lesley Logan 2:35  You can, you can call us and leave us a message. And I would love to hear how to say that. (inaudible) Walpurgis Night is also known as the other Halloween. For example, on April 30th, a traditional Walpurgis night ritual involves the burning of an effigy of a witch on a campfire in Sweden. This is a bonfire night once thought to ward off evil spirits, but it's now a fun way to get rid of excess gardening trash. I'm here for the gardening trash. I'm not here for burning fucking witches. So, Brad, you sold me this wrong, because I didn't realize we're burning a witch. Brad Crowell 3:07  It said an effigy of a witch.Lesley Logan 3:09  An effigy of a witch. That's burning a witch. This is we are upset. We're rejecting.Brad Crowell 3:15  Oh, yeah, it's the sculpture or model of a person. Lesley Logan 3:18  Yeah. Brad Crowell 3:18  Well, we're getting rid of those witches. Lesley Logan 3:20  No, no, the witches are the healers, Brad, look it up. So the witches actually were the women healers who had all the information, and they kept it, and they passed it down to the other women about all these different ways to heal from different illnesses and aches and pains, and also how to do periods. And they had these wonderful, wonderful informations. And when they made those healers witches, those women became people that no one could talk to. They became untouchables. And so after three generations, you now no longer have history, and that is how they control you ladies, that's how they do it. So anyways, now that I've fixed that day, why don't you go on with the holiday that sounds way better?Brad Crowell 3:59  Oh yeah, we're not for burning witches. International Jazz Day, this is Brad's excitement here, join with people around the world as this day promotes jazz's roots and our intercultural influence every year, on April 30th. All that jazz. Many considered America's classical music, yeah, maybe, after all, jazz began in New Orleans over 100 years ago. Legendary jazz pianist and composer Herbie Hancock, along with, along with the UN helped create International Jazz Day in 2011. Read on for a musical look distinctly American art form, and don't miss out on a list of four cool jazz sub genres. Lesley Logan 4:36  Brad, what are those four sub genres? Brad Crowell 4:38  I have no idea, and didn't read the rest of that whole book. But what I can tell you is that this is something I love, I'm passionate about. I grew up listening on the way home from soccer practice with my dad, we would listen to 90.1 and it was Temple's Jazz, Temple Philadelphia Jazz station. So it really left an impact on me as a youngster, I got really into the music. And my dad wasn't really playing like performing jazz, but he does play the trombone. And was playing the trombone at the church, never playing jazz. He was always playing, you know, hymns and choirs, stuff, whatever. But, you know, I got really into that, and that was an inspiration as a kid to play the trombone myself. And then all through high school, I got really into jazz, and then I went to college for it, and I studied the trombone playing jazz there. And when I moved out to L.A. I sat all that down, and I started playing rock and roll with my bass guitar and singing and all that stuff. It was fun. But coming to Vegas, just down the street from where we live, is a lovely. Lesley Logan 5:34  Less than a mile. It's like half a mile, maybe three quarters, but. Brad Crowell 5:37  It is a hour that hosts a live jazz night every Monday night, and it's fantastic. Like the musicians are, you know, either grads or they're going through UNLV's Jazz programs. Some of them are doing their masters in music. And these guys get together and they jam every Friday. Lesley Logan 5:55  Monday. Brad Crowell 5:55  Every Monday, sorry, every Monday. And I have been very intentional about making sure I'm there. I just love listening. And I literally am, like, the super dork. People think I'm the manager or the owner of the bar. Lesley Logan 6:06  Because he has his computer out, you guys, and he works.Brad Crowell 6:08  Because I take my laptop and I work in the back corner. Lesley Logan 6:10  I'm like, 10 till 2. 10 pm till 2 am.Brad Crowell 6:13  Yeah, one. Usually I'm leaving around 1:15 but it's three hours of live jazz. They do three sets, and the third set is my favorite, because, talking about sub genres, they always start with, like, a little bit, like, you know, lower, more palatable, as it were, and by the end of the night they're playing, like, huge, like, intense fusion, crazy, like, like, like driving music. And I eat that up. I love that. I think it's, it is also my ADHD brain.Lesley Logan 6:41  Are we gonna tell them where to go for this jazz music? Brad Crowell 6:43  Yeah, it's called The Hard Hat, The Hard Hat Bar. Brad Crowell 6:46  You're trying to keep it to yourself but you're selling it. Brad Crowell 6:48  Yeah, yeah. No one else will love to go. I have my spot in the corner, so. Lesley Logan 6:50  Also, if you're in Vegas on a Monday night, there's not a lot to do. This is a thing you can do, and it's one of the oldest parts. It's not the oldest bar, but people think it is. It's one of the oldest bars.Brad Crowell 6:59  It was in the is started in the 60's, I think.Lesley Logan 7:01  Yeah. According to Las Vegas City (inaudible), it's the third oldest bar.Brad Crowell 7:05  Yeah, but we love it. I love it. Lesley has been there once I think. Lesley Logan 7:08  Zero times. Brad Crowell 7:08  Zero times? You've never been?Lesley Logan 7:09  You've never taken me. Nope. That's why.Brad Crowell 7:10  It's not I haven't taken you. You there's never a chance where you're awake. Zero chances that you're awake.Lesley Logan 7:16  There's zero chances, I mean, on a Monday night. But I here's the thing, guys, I gotta go, because Brad doesn't really under, like, he didn't really understand what like signals he was putting out one Monday night. These people were at his table where he has his computer so he can watch and be on his computer. So he just kept looking at the people at this table over and over and over again. Brad Crowell 7:35  Yeah, I kept glancing and like, how many drinks are these people gonna have, like I want my corner. I like my little spot.  Lesley Logan 7:41  And then he, like, had us finally sit down with his back to them. So then he kept turning around and looking at them, and so they bought him a drink, thinking he was hitting on them.Brad Crowell 7:52  It's true. They definitely, I apparently got caught looking and and I realized, oh yeah, okay, that happened.Lesley Logan 7:59  Yeah, I'm just fine when you're table, although I this would happen to anybody like us, because, like, I'm near my table, that's my spot. Anyways, I'll get to The Hard Hat one of these days, one of these Tuesdays, I won't have to get up at five in the morning, so I'll check it out. But go, go listen to some jazz. Go just play it on your Spotify today, because it's International Jazz Day.Brad Crowell 8:14  If you want, if you want some recommendations, I'm a big fan of a US based group. They're from DC area. They're named Snarky Puppy, and it's, it's a really cool group, because they are like a mix of different musicians that will come in and leave. So sometimes this the band might be four people, sometimes it might be 20 people, right? And they and they just, wherever they do concerts, they pull in all these locals, and they have, like the band director effectively, is a brilliant composer, and he composes with other people. But I've really enjoyed listening to Snarky Puppy. So if you're wondering, you know, what are we talking about here, check them out. Brad Crowell 8:53  I hope people have an idea of jazz. I would love so. The world is going to hell. And I think it is really, especially hell, if you have not heard some jazz.Brad Crowell 9:01  Yeah, but I'm not listening to like, Kenny G elevator jazz, like, that's not my jam. I want something that has definitely got more, you know, juice.Lesley Logan 9:10  Yeah, yeah. Okay. Well, thanks, babe, thanks for, I love your holiday.Brad Crowell 9:15  I have another one. I'm gonna share one more. Lesley Logan 9:16  Okay. Brad Crowell 9:17  So Stan Kenton's Cuban Fire Suite is a journey, and it's worth just sitting down with a, you know, a glass of wine and listening to it from start to finish. I love it. Have so much fun. Enjoy that. Brad Crowell 9:27  All right, here's what's coming up. So Lesley is super busy tomorrow, starting all day, because we have a whole bunch of people coming to the house. They're actually been coming through all day today, doing private sessions with Lesley, and tomorrow she's kicking off the Cadillac Weekend. Lesley Logan 9:42  It's the third weekend of five weekends. Brad Crowell 9:44  For eLevate, her mentorship program.Lesley Logan 9:47  Yeah, and if you're wanting to know more information about 2027's eLevate, there's a few spots left. We actually, on the day we're recording this, accepted two more people. So between, they may have already put their deposit in, which maybe we really like have three spots left, but don't be like, oh, I'm never gonna get it. Like, if you want it, fine, right? Like, we can talk about it. The application is really easy. It's mostly so I can make sure it's the right program for you. I don't, I don't want to sell you something that's not what you're looking for. So lesleylogan.co/elevate. A seventh through the 10th, we'll be in, well, Scottsdale, actually, Brad, we're in Scottsdale at P.O.T. so we hope to see you there. We'll have a booth. I'm not teaching at it, but we'll have a booth. So come, come by. Say hi. I think we're gonna have the dog. Lesley Logan 10:27  Yeah, we're gonna bring Bayon. We're driving in. We're taking the dog. It's a camp tent. Brad Crowell 10:33  We called ahead, and they were like, oh yeah, we're totally dog friendly toys, we're ike, heck, yeah, let's do it.Lesley Logan 10:37  So we're bringing our dog, because it would be so sad. We'll have him home for a month and we have to leave him again. Spring Training is right after we get back. It is May 12th to the 17th. It's about getting upside down, getting overhead. It's really like all the OPC teachers and I are using the workouts.Brad Crowell 10:51  That's OPC Spring Training.Lesley Logan 10:52  Yeah, we're using the workouts and on the mat reformer, tower, and Wunda chair to help you understand the connections, you need to actually do upside down overhead exercises with control and strength so you don't have to fear about hurting your neck or or also you think like I can't do these exercises. I have belly abundance or chest abundance, or whatever. Now there are people that they're not ideally for, but well, you'll learn the replacement exercises for yourself. So you can be in any of these classes, because I do not believe to be an advanced practitioner you do upside down stuff. To be an advanced Pilates practitioner, you have to have connections, so you could be doing non upside down stuff and be an advanced practitioner. So I'm excited for you for that. So opc.me/events and then Summer Tour is literally gonna be announced at any moment, and if it hasn't already so opc.me/tour.Brad Crowell 11:39  Tickets are coming at the end of May or beginning of June, because it'll basically be after spring training.Lesley Logan 11:46  Yeah, right after. So we are going to do, we are doing, and we're doing a route we've never done before.Brad Crowell 11:51  Yeah, I know I'm excited. We're going to be going straight across the middle of the country all the way out to Knoxville, and then we're going to loop back around and hit North Texas on the way back. And then I think we're going to do Tucson, because we haven't been there in a really long time. Lesley Logan 12:01  Yeah, fixing it up, giving another city in Arizona some love, so. Lesley Logan 12:06  But go to opc.me/tour.Lesley Logan 12:11  Oh my god, we've already seen the merch.Brad Crowell 12:13  It's really fun. Lesley Logan 12:14  You guys, even though every year, every tour, we're like, that's so great. How could it get better? It gets better, it gets better. It gets better. So anyways, we have to get into Shari, because she's so great. But before we do that, we have a question.Brad Crowell 12:25  We sure do. @laurat9266 from YouTube asks, hey, would you ever consider a springboard for home use over the Wunda chair or spine corrector? I am gonna jump in right now.Lesley Logan 12:38  Okay, tell me, what do you think?Brad Crowell 12:39  They do, completely different thing.Lesley Logan 12:41  Great job. Brad. Way to go.Brad Crowell 12:42  Thank you. Like, why not have both.Lesley Logan 12:45  Well, and also, like a springboard, it just hangs on the wall, takes up almost no space, so you could still have room for a spine corrector. Brad Crowell 12:47  Well, that's what I mean. You clearly need a reformer to do the springboard, so.Lesley Logan 12:47  No, you just need a wall. The springboard is like a. Brad Crowell 12:47  I was thinking the jump board. Lesley Logan 12:47  You were thinking a jump board. But also still a different thing. Brad Crowell 12:54  They still do different things. Lesley Logan 13:00  Yeah. So the springboard is, like, what you see on the walls with it's like, my wall unit, but like, half of a wall, because it doesn't even stick out from the wall. Brad Crowell 13:10  Right. This just got a couple hooks in it. Lesley Logan 13:12  Because I don't know why you're considering these three, right? Like, it sounds like space might be a diff, like, what we're talking about. Brad Crowell 13:19  Well, maybe also cost. Lesley Logan 13:20  Yeah or it could be cost. Springboards can be expensive, you guys, like, they are almost the same price as my tower, my tower, because I bought the high mat with it, it's like $2,200 full price. So like a springboard is like $1,700 I'm you have to look at these things, and also, who knows, because of all the shits going on. So use my discount. We'll put our, we'll put our Balanced Body, Contrology discount in here. But here's the thing, it depends on what you need. So if you're someone who has a bit more asymmetries, and you're more building your connections up than a springboard, or I prefer my Controlology wall tower, to be honest, because it has the push through bar and it's away from the wall, so it actually provides you the opportunity to do monkey, which you need space behind the tower to do. And also there's some things you can hang off the poles for, like there's just stuff you can do that you can't do with a springboard. So I prefer that if you're using that that can be a great way to take your mat practice to the next level, reformer practice to the next level, and develop the connections you need to advance your practice. When you look at equipment, when the space, the surface space, gets smaller, the more advanced it gets. So the Wunda chair, if you look at the surface space of a Wunda chair, compared to a mat or reformer or Cadillac, springboard, would be using a mat. It's going to be a more advanced piece of equipment. It's going to challenge the connections you have. There's definitely a lot of uses for it to teach exercises that are more advanced on the reformer and mat. It's just inherently a bit more of an advanced piece of equipment. It requires strong balance and connections. Has a lot of great work for asymmetry connections, but it's not easy. It's definitely got a challenge I love I love it, and I think it's wonderful for home use. Also you can do like five, six exercises on. And jump off. It's not it's great. The spine corrector is a whole different modality. So if you were to get one, only one thing, I would say, if you have access to doing mat work or going to a studio for other stuff, get a spine corrector because there's very few spine corrector classes, and every single person who listens to this podcast should be on a spine corrector, every single person. There is a plethora of exercises on there, but there's two series on there that everyone can do almost daily without overworking themselves, and that is the arm series and the leg series. So I really love a spine corrector. I love the Contrology one, mostly. But if you have an arc, you can check and look at my videos. I have tips on how to do that. So I would just say, like it really depends on what your goals are, Laura, and then it's go from there, you'll pick but you could honestly have all three of these in the same space, because, like the spine corrector can hang on a wall, the Springboard's on a wall, the Wunda chair can be pushed up against someone when it's not in use, you could pull it all out. So that's you know. Get them all.Brad Crowell 16:01  If you want to know which Contrology spine corrector she's talking about, just go to opc.me/spinecorrector opc.me/spinecorrector, and you'll be able to find that over there. Yeah. So great question. Thanks for asking. If you have a question, just text us at 310-905-5534, or— Lesley Logan 16:16  Go ahead.Brad Crowell 16:16  You can submit it through, beitpod.com/questions where you can leave both a win and a question or one or the other. Lesley Logan 16:25  And you can also, anytime you want to buy anything from Balanced Body or Controlology, like, reach out for our affiliate link, because if you if you can get a discount, you should, and if you can't, well, I mean, there's reasons why you can't, but you can always just talk to me and we'll figure out if it works. But like, why not try? Doesn't hurt. Brad Crowell 16:42  Why not try? Love it. Yeah, stick around. We'll be right back. Brad Crowell 16:46  Welcome back. Let's dig into this convo you have with Shari Teigman. Shari is a dynamic performance coach and creative business strategist who empowers driven individuals to break free from conventional expectations and unleash the Maverick within. She specializes in guiding ambitious professionals and high achievers who are exhausted by the status quo and currently navigating life's major transitions such as midlife identity shifts and perimenopause. Using her bold, unconventional approach, she helps clients authentically unpack their emotional baggage, resolve internal contradictions and intentionally design lives guided by their own rules.Lesley Logan 17:27  We could have had her for three episodes like she's just phenomenal, has so much to share.Brad Crowell 17:33  I enjoy her transparency. I think it's really funny to me to listen to someone who is willing to be transparent so that people don't judge them. Because I know I do that, like, I build the caveat into the statement with what the things that I say. And I was listening to her do it, and I was like, and then she acknowledged that she was doing it. I was like, oh, that's really interesting. I get that.Lesley Logan 17:55  I also think that we both do it, and I've never acknowledged it. Sometimes I do. I'm like, I'm about to acknowledge, like, this is gonna sound hypocritical, but like, I don't know, like, I understand. Like, I like to say those things not to be judged. But like, so people know that I don't sit here on my pedestal like I've got it all together. You know? I think we all have to be human. Anyways, that's not what I loved. I loved, she said, in our lives, we walk around carrying everyone else's red shoes, pile of crap, and you walk around wheeling it with you, because you call it identity, you call it belonging. And she said, the first piece to finding yourself is to unpack. And I just, I was like, oh, that is like, what a visual, what a visual. We wheel this pile of crap around because we mistakenly call it our identity, belonging, culture, religion, family, like, all these things. And I've got a guest coming up that I've interviewed about, like, good daughtering And, like, I think especially the women listening to this can understand, like, you're like, taking on this stuff. Like, I have family members who are like, oh, do you want grandmas this and great grandparents this? It's like, oh my god, this is so much. I don't why do I have to be responsible for carrying on the legacy of this pot, you know, like that and it's not even, that's not even the emotional stuff. It's like, just like, but a visual of what things things are. And she said, this bag is filled with things that aren't yours, and so you have no room for new stuff. And that is like, so powerful. Like, if you're struggling to try new things, do new things, find yourself it's like, you can't, because I can't buy new a new coat. With this closet so full, I gotta get rid of some stuff, which is, which is the reason we're laughing is because we're packing, like, as we're recording this, we're packing for Europe. And I was like, it's gonna be so cold, and I love coats, and I can only bring one coat, and, like, buy another coat. I'm like, I don't need another coat. I have great coats. I can only take one. So you ultimately have to understand why you keep repacking the same thing in order to finally get a chance to make any real choices. So I love this because, like, I feel like some people think that they're self-sabotaging, or they're in the same spiral. It's like, Yeah, but you kept packing the same stuff, expecting a new result, you know. Brad Crowell 20:05  Or you're carrying around old shit. Lesley Logan 20:06  Yes, but, and you just keep repacking the old shit, and that's why you don't get anything new. Like, we had Brad Bisjack on, and I'm pretty sure it was in his episode we talked about, like, to get to the next level, you have to have a new backpack of stuff, you know. So anyways, like, I think there's some physical and mental unpacking a lot of us have to do if we want to be it till we see it. Brad Crowell 20:27  That's episode 589, if you're wondering. Brad Bizjack, it was a fantastic episode. Lesley Logan 20:32  I've stopped guessing, it's beyond. Brad Crowell 20:34  Yeah, it's all right, we're at 674, not 47.Lesley Logan 20:37  I wish I could have kept going, guys, it would have been like this thing, if you've been a longtime listener that like, wow, she keeps doing it. But now new listeners, I used to be like, I used to just get them right. This one, that one.Brad Crowell 20:49  Well, I really loved when she was talking about the next step after the red shoes, where she was talking about making space for new things, like the unpacking part of it. She said, in order for you to okay, hold on, how much joy do you actually want? How much joy do you want in your life? Lesley Logan 21:08  Okay, you're asking me? Brad Crowell 21:09  I'm asking you, how much joy do you want?Lesley Logan 21:11  Like, all the joy.Brad Crowell 21:12  All the joy, all the joy. I want all the joy. Do you want all the joy? Of course, why would we not say I want joy. I want happiness in my life? She said, equal to the level of joy and fulfillment and peace that you want in your life, you have to be willing to go as deep internally.Lesley Logan 21:29  Oh, I see yes.Brad Crowell 21:31  So if you want massive amounts of joy, you have to be willing to go massively deep into yourself. Right? And so she was talking about unpacking and letting go. And she said, you know, when she discovered some of the things, she said letting go of those things, it wasn't like an overnight thing. And she said it was actually she had, she to go through a grieving process when she was letting go of some of the things because, you know, you've, you've embraced this worldview for your entire life. Or you were, like someone hurt, you know, you were hurt in some way by someone or something or whatever, and or something failed, and it really, you know, scarred you. You know, she said, during the process of unpacking, it actually created a lot of grief. And she said, but if you don't do it, that emotion will sneak up on you and it will come back and bite you in the ass when you don't want it to. Lesley Logan 22:25  Right. You have to do it anyways. You're gonna have to do it. You may as well do it in a time when you're in control of it. Brad Crowell 22:30  Yeah. I mean, it's, it's part of the process of making space for something new. And she said, if we feel trapped, how we get out of that is we release, we go deeper in and then, and then we can come out the other side. So, you know, you, if you're feeling stuck right now, it has to be looking internally, and that's gonna be how (inaudible). Lesley Logan 22:49  All the work. Like, I don't want to do a little bit of work, just have a little bit of joy. That seems like an annoying amount of effort. I'd rather do a lot of work to have a lot of joy. Like that feels like I'm in it to win on that. Brad Crowell 22:58  100% well stick around we'll be right back. Lesley Logan 23:00  I want to go off on a tangent. Brad Crowell 23:01  Just get it, go up on a tangent. Lesley Logan 23:02  Okay, so, today, the day we're recording this, Margaret Margarita Margareta Magnusson died. She got people excited about or aware of something called the Swedish death cleaning. And the Swedish death cleaning is that you, you, it's a Scandinavian decluttering method that is about removing unnecessary items before you die, so that you're not leaving your fucking red shoes for someone else to back around. And the idea is, like, it's it's not supposed to be like, morbid. It's actually supposed to be like, you invite people over. They take that, you tell them the story about the things and the things that nobody wants, and you can, like, let go of and someone can take, so that when you pass, one, all those things are gone. And two, like, in your living days, tell people how important that was, or what that thing meant, or where the history of that thing was, so they can have it. And then when you pass, they don't have to clean up your crap.Brad Crowell 23:56  Yeah, it's Döstädning. I love it. That's actually brilliant. And as long as you're not guilt-tripping people into taking your shit, don't do that.Lesley Logan 24:05  Right. You know what? We all know who those people are in our lives, and we don't have to go so. Brad Crowell 24:08  Yeah, it's called Döstädning, and it, you know, as it works, as long as you're not guilt tripping people into taking your shit. But there's a book about it. It's called The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning.Lesley Logan 24:18  Do you think if I send that to my mom, it would be considered passive aggressive or just aggressive?Brad Crowell 24:26  Well, I mean, wait, that she should be doing this? Lesley Logan 24:30  I think that I. Brad Crowell 24:31  Well, but that means that we have to go, like, everyone goes to the place and there's like a ceremony. Lesley Logan 24:36  Other people go, I've already, don't I already already took what I need, but she should do it for other people.Brad Crowell 24:41  Yeah, no. I mean, I think this is wise. I think this, this is more of a process of actually the telling of the story and the stuff gives things meaning. Right. And so my grandfather didn't quite do it this way, but he while he was alive, he let the kids my my parent, my dad. And his siblings go through everything and get rid of it. So by the time, you know, when he did pass away, eventually, you know, the cleanup of his estate was like, it was done immediately. Everything was already ready to go. So I saw that, and that was, like, really helpful. But not gonna lie, even with being diligent, it took my parents years, years, even being diligent, right? Lesley Logan 25:24  And I, he didn't do it. But I do feel like the things, some of the things we took, we got the history of it through the family members, but like, I just, this is just on the tangent of like, sharing, like, in the physical and emotional space, of like, what can we do for the people around us so that they don't feel this need to carry on? Because I do think some of the listeners, like, I have family members who, like, won't let go of stuff, because, like, that was my like, I feel I've even heard your friend go, that's great grandpa's stuff. And it's like, holy shit. We are going to need bigger homes, not just like, physically, but. Brad Crowell 25:54  Like, we're making our own museums.Lesley Logan 25:56  Mentally, because, like, you, you it's hard. It's just anyways, we all want to be better people want to have joy in sometimes we're don't. We don't have that because we got a bunch of other people's stuff in the way. That's all. Anyways, it's just another way of thinking about it.Brad Crowell 26:08  Wait one, one less way to be trapped. Yeah, because, because trapped now, now I'm see because trapped is two things. You can be trapped by keeping the stuff yourself. You can also be trapped if someone dies and leaves you a bunch of shit you got to deal with. So, right? You know, like, it's, it's definitely challenging so.Lesley Logan 26:25  And it's, and when they, and if they do those red shoes she's talking about, I'm just thinking about like, when people die suddenly, or they die and there's unanswered emotional like problems and stuff like, you then feel like you have to protect the red shoes. And so I just think that there's some things we could be doing as we be it until we see it, as we change our lives, become better than the people like we once were to get 1% better, whatever those things are. How can we be making it so that the people around us don't carry our fucking red shoes? I don't want anyone carrying I mean, you might like them, but I don't want anyone have it feel like they have to. Brad Crowell 26:54  All right. Well, stick around. We'll be right back. We're gonna dig into those Be It Action Items with Shari Teigman. Brad Crowell 27:01  Welcome back. All right, let's talk about the Be It Action Items that you have with your convo with Shari Teigman. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away? She said, when it comes to being trapped and going deeper and trying to figure that out, how do we do that? She said, however, you need to. Punch it out. Punch a pillow. Cry in a pillow, write it out, burn it out, whatever your ritual needs to be, dance it out. Bang it out. She explains that we have to tell the truth to ourselves. We cannot pretend that like only having the highlight reel and then that that's okay and it's gonna allow us to feel like a human, because otherwise it will still sneak up on you, right? If we don't allow emotion, the emotion will sneak up on you when you don't want it. And she said, emotion is just emotion. It's not good or bad. Lesley Logan 27:44  This goes back to Dr. Bender, like her second interview. She's like, we always are trying to figure out the reason why we feel an emotion. But she's like, just let it go by. Sometimes it's just emotion your body wants to feel. It has nothing to do with what you're thinking about right now. Brad Crowell 27:55  Yeah, she said she views this active emotional release as essential. Basically, she said, I'm going to grieve, because it's part of my process of making space for something new. So, yeah, I thought that was great. I mean, I think especially acknowledging that emotion is just emotion. It's not good or bad. Don't judge yourself, you know. I mean, don't maybe don't break a window. But, like, you know, if you have to be loud, be loud. It's okay. Lesley Logan 28:21  When I leave breath work for the Agency members, I'm like, you could laugh, you could cry, you could do you could want to, like, scream into a pillow. You could need to get up and dance. You can need to shake your hands like you don't need to figure out why you need to do that. Just do the thing because it doesn't like, it's just, we're we're trying to release what's inside you. We don't have to figure out why we need to release what's inside you. Just let it go. Okay. Brad Crowell 28:39  Yeah. What about you? Lesley Logan 28:40  So many good so many good things. But this is brilliant. She said, clean up the internal contradictions, which, by the way, as an ADHD person, this is like, I'm a walking internal contradiction. But if you don't understand, I like people, I want to be away from them. She's, she's like, you're, she said, if you're saying, you want to have a bigger life, but you keep making micro choices. You're lying to your nervous system, because you're answering the old version of yourself like you're not actually doing the work you're not doing the be it till you see it. This is basically what you're doing. So she said, the identity you want for the life you you want is going to require align actions to that. So what you want, you have to make align actions for that. It sounds common sensical, but look at the internal contradictions you're doing. What are you doing that's not necessarily aligned? So she advises to choose your actions intentionally instead of making excuses. And I think this is, you know, really important. I remember, like trying to figure out, like, an excuse for why I was late for things or not able to do stuff. And honestly, it's so much easier to go I just didn't do it. I screwed up, like, instead of I think it's a lot easier, and you can just move on and go from there. So I agree with that. And then she said, once you clean all this up, the questions you ask will become much more clear and much more honest, and then you'll get those like, answers that align with that. So she this is just such a good episode. You have to listen to the whole thing. So if you haven't, got to go listen to it, because we cannot do Shari Teigman the way Shari Teigman does Shari Teigman. You got to listen to her. And she does have a journal coming out, The Maverick Way: A Field Guide to Coming Undone on Purpose. And you can go follow her on Instagram. We have all that in there. Shari Teigman. So anyways, I love it. I'm Lesley Logan. Brad Crowell 30:18  And I'm Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 30:19  Hey, go listen to the episode. Share it with a girlfriend who needs to hear it. Share it with a friend who's carrying around someone else's red shoes. And maybe that becomes the thing like, sounds like you got some red shoes of somebody's, I don't know, share it with a friend, because this is how the podcast continues to grow. Gets even better guests. Brad Crowell 30:35  Even better. Lesley Logan 30:35  I'm so excited for where we're growing, and the people that we've been able to get on. The lineup that you've got coming up is some really fun, amazing things. So go, Be It Till You See It. Brad Crowell 30:44  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 30:45  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 31:27  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 31:32  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 31:37  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 31:44  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 31:47  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Brad Crowell 32:00  Hi, okey doke. Episode 647. Lesley Logan 32:06  Wait. Say that again. Brad Crowell 32:09  Episode 647 Lesley Logan 32:10  Say it one more time. Brad Crowell 32:12  Episode 647Lesley Logan 32:13  674 Brad Crowell 32:16  Episode 674 Lesley Logan 32:18  Whoa, dyslexic. Hey, keepsake. How about keepsake on that one. Lesley Logan 32:24  Episode 674, Shari Teigman. Lesley Logan 32:27  Just so we are all clear, because I need evidence and receipts. My husband, two days in a row has just that dyslexic marking these dates down.Brad Crowell 32:36  Any fucking way. Let's move on. All right. 674, Shari Teigman. Bayon, thank you. Please don't bark. Brad Crowell 32:45  Stan Kenton wrote, wrote something called the wow. My my middle school no high school jazz band. My high school jazz band actually played from start to finish, pausing. Welcome back.Lesley Logan 33:06  I'm here. Brad Crowell 33:07  Welcome back. Lesley Logan 33:08  So Walpurgis, night. Brad Crowell 33:10  Walpurgis. Lesley Logan 33:11  Walpurgis. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It is easy to get trapped in the "but I've always done it this way" cycle, but making an impact requires the courage to put a bow on things that no longer serve your bigger vision. In this last Fuck Yeah Friday episode of April, Lesley Logan dives into the power of ending programs with grace to make room for what's next. She celebrates incredible global wins, from conservation success stories to falling crime rates, while highlighting how to embrace being a badass at the boring-but-necessary tasks like bookkeeping.If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Positive news and wins happening right now from around the world.The importance of cheering for peers who raise their rates.Navigating tax season and the victory of mastering QuickBooks reports.Reflection on the strategic decision to end the business retreat.Episode References/Links:Winning Mindset - https://beitpod.com/winningmindsetSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Lesley Logan 0:00  It's Fuck Yeah Friday.Brad Crowell 0:01  Fuck yeah. Lesley Logan 0:02  Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 0:44  Hi, Be it babe, you made it to the end of April. You're here. You did it. Oh my god 1/3 of the year wrapped up. We're done, right? So I don't know if that's a win or like, oh my god. I don't know. I'm recording this in February. I'm unclear whether we were, like, wanting this year to get faster or slow down, you know, but hopefully you're enjoying that freedom horse. So I have inspirational posts, then a win of yours, then a win of mine, and a mantra for you. So if you're new to our Friday episodes. It's a short and quick, wonderful episode, and that scratching in the background is my dog literally not comfortable in his bed. Lesley Logan 1:30  Okay, good news from around the world that nobody talks about this is from Winning Mindset. So Australia can become the first nation in the world to eliminate cervical cancer. That's so fucking cool. That is amazing. Pandas are no longer considered at risk of extinction. This is one of the greatest success stories in wildlife conservation.Lesley Logan 1:52  It's amazing. Pandas are, you know what? They're like, (inaudible) to me, they're like, what's happening? Are these bears? What's going on? Portugal is preparing to open Europe's first large elephant sanctuary for elephants rescued from circuses and zoos. So that's interesting. I guess I would have thought that there was an elephant sanctuary already. But also, how many elephants are in Europe because I'm sure that they almost all been brought there. So way to go, Portugal. I love a true elephant sanctuary. The green turtle is no longer considered an endangered species, so that's crazy. Don't let people think that this means that there's no global warming, because there is. It just means that we're doing a better job saving species. The Netherlands are closing prisons that falling as falling crime rates reduce the number of inmates since 2009 more than 20 prisons have closed. That is amazing. I want that for us. I do. Well, I mean by us, I mean in the US, I know we have a lot of people listening all over the place. I have a lot of thoughts on prisons, and I know it's hard because there are some bad people out there, but also, like we're not recidivizing them very well, so we could be doing better. Norway has done the unthinkable, becoming the first country in the world to achieve near zero deforestation rates. I mean, my goodness, how cool is that? Freaking cool. Canada has passed a law that prohibits keeping large great apes and elephants in captivity. I love that. I mean, yes, I of course, I want people to see these animals, but also I want you to travel and see the world. You know, like, we got to a place where, like, the world's coming to us all the time, and I think we need to go see the world. I think that's what makes us more empathetic human beings. So I'm really excited about that. Go Canada. Some Dutch engineers created the world's largest vacuum cleaner, it's 600 meters long, which collects plastic from the oceans and helps restore marine life. I'm obsessed with that. So anyways, some good news, right? Lesley Logan 3:52  All right, so now it's for your win. This is from Amanda Barbee. She wrote, I think this is my favorite one so far, videographer we are learning together just increased her rates because she found her magic number six posts and I forgot how many reels, because I have been offline more, it's only $500 I only need to sell a new package a month. That's amazing. She has some more wins. But I love this. I love when women support women like sometimes when, like, we work with someone and we know our worth, and then sometimes they raise the rates on us, and we're like, right? But really, if our response is, yeah, like, of course, good job. Like, that's the best thing. I love it. When people in my life, services I use raise their rates, I go, fuck yeah, go, girl, get it, you know, like, and then sometimes things become out of my price point, and that's fine. I can still, I can still want to see them win, right? So she also said that she was able to talk to a quick book customer service rep for an hour yesterday, and got positive reinforcement that I am savvy with QuickBooks and with the interface so well, and that I'm a good business person because I've pulled through the same report three different ways to cross reference my blah, blah, blah, and I did it all myself. Thanks for thanks to the reps that they use, I've been able to do it this only one and a half hours without having bookkeeping fiascos. I mean, here's the deal I'm gonna tell you right now, if you are someone who had your taxes all done and this, Amanda said this to me in February, in February, no matter if you feel like you're a baller at QuickBooks or WooCommerce or whatever the tools you have to use, like you're kind of bad as you're very much winning. My team was like, we're just waiting on some things, but our taxes are basically done. We'll just file them in April, because that's when we file our personals. And I was like, oh, I mean, like, I feel like, what an amazing win, because no one wants to deal with that. So if you are dealing with the stuff no one wants to deal with, you are winning, right? Like, sometimes we're like, oh, I didn't do anything this week. All I did was my taxes. You know what? Something people avoid. So way to fucking go. That's a big way that I would put that in the big win category. Lesley Logan 5:50  All right. So now a win of mine. So we have this program that not many people know that we have, every other year do a business retreat for Pilates instructors, and we've done, I think this will be our we just wrapped our fifth one. Want to say it was our fifth. One might have been our fourth. I think it was our fifth. And about three months before it was about to happen, we also had these other ideas of some stuff that we're working on, and I'll share more with you as I can. But at any rate, something like one of my values is authenticity. Another value is transparency, another value is communication. Right? And a lot of people, whenever we have a program, they're like, oh, I can't do this. I'll do the next one. And I knew there's a lot of people saying they want to do a next, the next one. And I just wanted to be honest with people, you know, when I realized that like for us to continue to move forward on some of the things that we're working on, for us to have the impact that we want to make we can't do every single program we've ever done forever. We have to like something has to go. And as much as I love our business retreat that we do in the capacity that we do it, I know that we can't promise that we'll do one ever again. I guess it doesn't mean we'll never do one, but like in the capacity that we do it, the way that we currently host it. It just, it can't continue. And so I wanted, we made that announcement a few months ago, and we just wrapped that amazing last one, and it was such a celebration. I think sometimes when things are the last you like, there's almost like, it's easy for it to almost be like an ending, or like a funeral, you know, like, you're like, oh, like, I watched Suni Lee, like, doing her last floor thing, and the way she was giving herself a pep talk was like, it's yes, it's the last one, but it's a celebration of all the hard work. And so I just want to say, like, our my win is we recognized it was the last one before it was, before it happened, so that we could really, truly give everything we wanted to it. No regrets, no oh, I wish I'd done that before we ended it and I could put a bow on it like that's wrapped, that's a wrap. And I'm proud of the work we did, and I'm proud of the lives we changed, and I'm proud of the people that we coached in that capacity. And I don't know what's next for an idea like that or a program like that in this moment, I don't need to that's a win. That's a win. We can actually be proud of the work that we did and put a bow on it. And I think for my overachievers listening, that's really hard to do, like I always have done it, so I have to keep doing it, and the truth is we don't. So thank you to every single person around the world who came to that program. Thank you for being you. It was really such an honor to do that event. I don't take it lightly. The impact in the world has been incredible. The takeaways that we always hear are remarkable, and I can't wait to see what you do next, truly. Lesley Logan 8:32  All right, your mantra for the week. I have come farther than I would have ever thought possible, and I am learning along the way. I have come farther than I would ever have thought possible, and I'm learning along the way. Yes, you have and you are, you're amazing. You're being it till you see it. Have an amazing day. Lesley Logan 8:51  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 9:34  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 9:39  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 9:43  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 9:50  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 9:54  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What does it look like to truly radiate love and respect from the inside out? Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell break down the powerful conversation with Angie Hawkins, an "Inner Glow Coach" and author of Running in Slippers. A former high-achieving corporate professional who survived a suicide attempt, Angie's story is a profound roadmap for anyone chasing external validation at the expense of their soul. Lesley and Brad explore the political nature of beauty standards, the necessity of nervous system regulation, and why your self-love actually raises the world's vibration. If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co. And as always, if you're enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.In this episode you will learn about:Understand the link between beauty standards and the loss of rights.Discover why inner glow starts with internal love and respect.Learn how radiant self-love combats global negativity and low vibrations.Explore the importance of enforcing boundaries to protect your energy.Master Angie's three-step process for a total personal life transformation.Episode References/Links:OPC Spring Training (Virtual Event) - opc.me/eventseLevate Mentorship Program - lesleylogan.co/elevatePilates Summer Tour - opc.me/tourThe Body Is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor - https://a.co/d/0jjAUZbzRunning in Slippers Book - https://www.runninginslippers.com/shopFree 60-Minute Find Your Glow Session - https://www.runninginslippers.com/coachingAngie Hawkin's Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/angiehawkins808Mindi's Closet - https://www.mindiscloset.comMason Pearson - https://masonpearson.comHigherDOSE Dry Brush - https://beitpod.com/higherdoseaffiliateSubmit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSIDEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentCheck out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper's Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipmentBe in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlistBe It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-surveyBe a part of Lesley's Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/Resources:Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gLesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQProfitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/Follow Us on Social Media:Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-gFacebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilatesLinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses Episode Transcript:Brad Crowell 0:00  What she discovered was it was actually going internal that allowed her to see who she is and understand, you know, the value that she has, and began to change things, you know. So she said, it's about coming back home to who you actually are. Instead of trying to change all these things that are you're doing, or in your life, or all these external things, it's internal.Lesley Logan 0:24  Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. Lesley Logan 1:06  Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the liberating convo I have with Angie Hawkins in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause, because she's pretty cool. I think she's.Brad Crowell 1:19  She's cool. Also like really powerful story.Lesley Logan 1:21  Powerful story, and thoughtful and, like, talk about it, be it till you see it story, and she's helping people. And so, I mean, you got to listen to it. You definitely should listen to it.Brad Crowell 1:30  Yeah, it's, it's, if you're sensitive to talking about suicide, she didn't go into gory details. But, like, yeah, that was, that's part of her story. Lesley Logan 1:38  You can skip that part. Yeah. We talk about, I mean, you can skip that part. Brad Crowell 1:42  I think it also made it even that much more powerful, because it wasn't like she was a angst, angsty teenager. You know, she was in, she was, she had a corporate career, and, like, even moved, you know, to a beautiful place to live. And still, you know, was, was unfulfilled and unhappy, and now today, she seems like she has come a long way. In a much different place.Lesley Logan 2:05  Yeah, I agree. And I, you know, it's hard when it's hard when people kind of bring up that part of their story, because I am like, oh gosh, I have, like, inserted a hey, skip ahead 30 seconds. And also they're on the other side of it. So I do kind of feel like hearing the whole journey is important too. Like, I don't want to take that away from people, and so it's, it's hard to make the decision. But also I, and I want people to speak really about their life. And I just really like her, I like what she's doing. I like her book. Everything's good. So today is April 23rd 2026 and it's Love Your Thighs Day. Brad Crowell 2:37  That's right. Lesley Logan 2:38  Love thyself.Brad Crowell 2:39  Love thy thighs.Lesley Logan 2:40  Yeah, no. Love thigh thigh self. Love thigh self. Brad Crowell 2:43  Love thigh self. Lesley Logan 2:44  Yes. This day is celebrated on the fourth, yeah, this day is celebrated on the fourth Thursday of a of April every year, and this year, it falls on April 23rd. Women all over the world have a love hate relationship with their bodies. They're constantly encouraged to love their bodies in a society where beauty standards have been predefined and sometimes are unreachable. In fact, most fucking time, Love Your Thighs Day seeks to mitigate this and tell all women around the world that no matter what their bodies look like, they should love them because it's theirs to cherish. You know, it's really interesting this last year's award season, the women are getting a little too, like, on the too skinny side. And I hate saying that because I don't want to judge.Brad Crowell 3:28  The 90s, the 90s thing. Lesley Logan 3:29  Yeah. And it's just really hard because, like, we grew up with that, so that was just, like, the norm, and like, whatever ones are trying to be. And then we had this like, moment where we're like, oh my god, that's, like, so unhealthy. And like, there, here's all the information, and like you can't, like you can't, bigger doesn't mean unhealthy, and all these different things. And now we're seeing that again, and it's it's hard for me to watch because I've also been too skinny. And, you know, I get people who say shitty things to me because I they my old YouTube videos are up, and we don't take them down. And you know, I'm in a different body that I'm learning to love and the and I like, I think it's interesting, because people like, oh, you used to be skinnier, and it's like, yeah, I used to be younger, too. I used to, used to have a different metabolism. I used to live in LA, like, I used to, I used to not teach Pilates. Like, there's a lot of used to's. So it's just really kind of interesting. I think the other thing that's really interesting is whenever they're trying to take your rights away. We talked about this before in the podcast, whenever they're trying to take women's rights away. If you look at the trends of what women what beauty in women is, it's always the skinny body, because they want you starving so you're not fueled in your brain to realize they're taking your rights away. The trad wife situation and being super thin, all of that coincides with every time they try to take women's rights away. And so I would just say, like, there's a great book. It's called the body is not an apology. The Body Is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor, excellent listen-to on tape if you are not a reader. Beautiful book to read. She had a great interview with Brené Brown many, many years ago because somebody attributed Sonia's quotes to Brené Brown, and Brené Brown's like, that's not my quote. Who said that? Let's make sure we give it to that person. And then Brené Brown interviewed her, and the whole patriarchy would fall down if we all, as women, stopped buying into that there's a certain standard of beauty. All of it is all the smoke and mirrors that has us busy spending money and making sure we look a certain way so we appeal to people who supposedly have the keys of the kingdom that we're looking for. And so you can start by just loving your own thighs. Show them off. Brad Crowell 5:34  I dig it. Lesley Logan 5:34  You know, we first moved to Vegas, I had to start filming in shorts, and I hated it because I could see my cellulite. And I was like, oh, I really hate that. And then one of our members was like, thanks for showing what real legs look like. And I was like, oh, that's a compliment. Okay, but, but, but also then I was like, fuck it. That made her feel good. And so now I'm going to wear shorts. It was a be it till I see it into loving myself in shorts. And now I just wear these short shorts, and my thighs are bigger than you think. And you know what it actually, I don't care. And I love (inaudible). I really do. They're great legs. So I think you have to kind of be it till you see it in some of these things, and you give permission for other people too, as well. So. Brad Crowell 6:12  You got this. Lesley Logan 6:13  Go, love your thighs. Thick thighs save lives. I don't know what business sells that shirt, but there's a business that sells a shirt that says, thick thighs save lives. And I highly recommend supporting that.Brad Crowell 6:23  It's like a whole meme.Lesley Logan 6:24  Yeah, yeah. I don't know. I got a sweatshirt from them, and I got tshirt from them, and it's, it's got the love thigh self and thick thighs save lives, yeah, yeah. So you can find one, I'm sure. Someone will make you one. You know what? Mindi on OPC will probably make you one with Mindi's Closet. So there you go. Lesley Logan 6:41  All right, spring training is around the corner, literally around the corner. We're gonna get those big thighs up over that head of yours. Believe it or not, it is possible. It is true and or we're gonna help you find out what exercises you are going to work on to get there. If you go to opc.me/events you can grab your ticket. If you're an OPC member, check your email. We send you instructions on how to sign up for free. If you're not OPC member, it's a nominal fee. Show up. It's fun. It's good time. eLevate, my mentorship program for comprehensively trained teachers, is almost full, if it's not already filled, but there might be a spot left. You just go to lesleylogan.co/elevate, and see if it's what you're looking for, and get on a call with Brad chat about what it is I just I had the best let me, can I? I'm gonna read a win from today's eLevate. I'm gonna keep their names private. But let me just tell you, this was so freaking sweet. Hold on.Brad Crowell 7:32  While you're while you're pulling that up. Summer tour is coming soon, so in August, we're gonna be hitting the road, and you can get information about that also when you're on the opc.me/events waitlist. But if you go to opc.me/tour tickets may be open really soon, like in the next week or three, so stay tuned for that, opc.me/tour. So tell me about eLevate.Lesley Logan 7:57  So one of the members this year said, I'd like to thank Lesley for pairing me with her partner, we just get each other. And while I feel like we're the odd couple, she's really neat in her practice, while I'm really messy and still trying to find my longest spine shapes, she's so patient with me. I also feel that her classical background complements my contemporary we definitely have our sessions feeling so much more accomplished, and the props are serious game changer. How fun is that? How sweet. Brad Crowell 8:21  I love it. I think it's amazing. Lesley Logan 8:22  I know. So you know you that could be you. You could be, like, having fun with another person this industry, like learning together. And it's just, it's beautiful. Brad Crowell 8:29  We have had many a an un-sought-out best friend matching. Yeah, we are connecting people who are going to work together for nine months, and then a lot of them stay connected afterwards. And we're we love that. We think that's amazing.Lesley Logan 8:42  They still work out together. And also in the alumni group, they're. Brad Crowell 8:46  I just talked to someone in from group one, who still talks to her partner often, yeah, like all the time.Lesley Logan 8:52  In three times a week now, there are eLevate grads from all the different rounds that work out together. There are three different ongoing weekly sessions that happen. Brad Crowell 9:01  I love that. Lesley Logan 9:02  Oh yeah. Every Wednesday, at 8am there are people in the UK, Florida, Colorado and California who work out together. Brad Crowell 9:07  Come on. Lesley Logan 9:08  On Sunday mornings, there's another group of people, oh yeah. And then then there's one. I don't know what the time the third group is I haven't really seen it yet, but I say that it's consistent. It's so much fun. It's great. Brad Crowell 9:17  That's awesome. Lesley Logan 9:18  Yeah. And also, the one of the groups has decided to watch their replays along the same weekend time as the current group is going through it. So. Brad Crowell 9:28  Wow. That's a commitment. Lesley Logan 9:29  They're watching their, they're watching their mat replays during the mat now that we'll just wrap the reformer there on the reformer section right now. It's hilarious. Brad Crowell 9:37  I think it's great. Lesley Logan 9:37  I love it.Brad Crowell 9:38  Amazing. Good for them. Lesley Logan 9:40  Like you never stop learning. So, anyways.Brad Crowell 9:42  All right, well, before we get into this amazing interview, we had a question, Ebbflowpilates on Instagram asks, hi, can you tell me more about the brush that you're using? Do you have a link?Lesley Logan 9:54  Oh, the brush for my mat to clean it?Brad Crowell 9:57  Oh, that's for your mat? Lesley Logan 9:59  Yeah. Brad Crowell 9:59  I thought it was like a face, face brush, which is why I included it here when we're loving our thighs.Lesley Logan 10:03  Oh, okay, well, I will give you all the brushes that I use, okay, so, but I remember seeing this question on the mat cleaning video that we have a YouTube video on, like how to clean your equipment. We have a live and a long form. So honestly, I use a baby's toothbrush. One that's very soft, bristle baby's toothbrush. That's the type of brush that I use for cleaning my equipment. For brushing my eyebrows, I use a spoolie, that's what they're called, and I use that spoolie to dye them. That's what I do. That's how they look this good. I dye them myself, because who has the time for another appointment? For my hair. I love the Mason Pearson, but, Heather, one of our Be It babes, bought me a another kind of brush that I can use in the shower. And it's a little. Brad Crowell 10:54  It's like a detangler. Lesley Logan 10:55  The detangler, and I'm it's the one with the handle. Apparently, it's very famous for not having a handle, but I have too thick of hair for that. Brad Crowell 11:02  Oh, right. Lesley Logan 11:02  So I like that one that she got me for in the shower, and also, I'll take it on travel, because I'm not worried about losing a very expensive British brush.Brad Crowell 11:11  Yeah. What's the British brush called? Lesley Logan 11:15  Mason Pearson? Mason Pearson. And that's what I think. It's beautiful. It's like, oh my god, it's like a mid century blue.Brad Crowell 11:23  Yeah, Mason Pearson hairbrush.Lesley Logan 11:25  Okay, let me tell you how the best way to get that brush in the States, my friends. Go to the U.K. and buy or, if you know a Brit who's flying in, have them pack it, because it was, it's so affordable, until you put the shipping on it, and then you immediately makes you order from the U.S., it's double the price. Brad Crowell 11:44  Is it affordable though? It's not a cheap brush. Lesley Logan 11:46  No, but it works. My hair looks amazing. I mean, if you're watching the YouTube video right now, you're like, Lesley, is it? We're three days out from a hair dye, so leave it alone. But yes, my hair is growing. I have very little breakage. I didn't even have a haircut for a year because, like, I've had no breakage. So those are the brushes I use. I'm trying to think, if there's another kind of brush, oh, I like a dry brush. HigherDOSE has a great dry brush. It's got copper in it.Brad Crowell 12:06  You got the pure boar or the boar and nylon? You have the mix. Lesley Logan 12:11  I have the mix because my, for the Mason Pearson, yeah, I have boar bristle which is really great for getting the oil, because I don't like to wash my hair every day. So it pulls the oil out of the roots and into the tips. It makes my hair nice and shiny and healthy and all that kind of stuff. But it depends. They'll have a little information on their site for Mason Pearson, like, what type of brush you get, because there's a full boar, there's a full like, silicone or whatever, and then there's mix. But I have, I have hair that needs mix.Brad Crowell 12:34  Yeah, there's, there's boar, nylon or.Lesley Logan 12:37  Here's why I really like it. It's doesn't have little balls at the end. So when you're taking the tangles out, it's not ripping them or pulling the tangle into a tighter not. I, you know, I have Type 2A hair. So if you have Type 2A wave hair, you know what that means?Brad Crowell 12:55  There's a there's a there's a rating system for hair?Lesley Logan 12:57  Yes, yes, Type 2A wave means your hair tangles. That's what it means. It means that the waves don't make any sense, and so when my hair is down, it just becomes a rat's nest within two hours. Don't even give me a scarf with my hair down or coat. That is a disaster. I try to do like a I like a low bun. Why do I like a low bun? Because a low pony is just a recipe for a tangle that is just in a ponytail. So I have to, even if I like my make my hair wavy and do the wave into it. Great. Now it's just gonna be a dread, like just dreads of wave knots. So. Brad Crowell 13:33  Party on. Well, anyway. Baby toothbrushes for the mat. Lesley Logan 13:38  Yes, for your Pilates equipment use that. All right. Brad Crowell 13:43  All right. Well, if you have a question, text us at 310-905-5534, or send it in to beitpod.com/questions.Lesley Logan 13:51  I'm clearly a wealth of knowledge. I can give you the names of every brush.Brad Crowell 13:57  beitpod.com/questions leave us a win or a question. Stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to talk about Angie Hawkins. Brad Crowell 14:04  Welcome back. Let's talk about Angie Hawkins. Angie is an "Inner Glow Coach" and the author of the raw memoir Running in Slippers, which I thought was a great title. She explains that on the episode. So if you're interested in understanding that, go back and listen to the interview.Lesley Logan 14:21  Because they're not the slippers you think.Brad Crowell 14:23  They certainly are not. She's a former corporate professional with over 20 years of experience. Angie spent decades as a high achieving people-pleaser who chased external validation until a move from Chicago to Hawaii revealed that she could not outrun her internal struggles after surviving a suicide attempt and navigating a profound rock bottom during the pandemic, she left the corporate world to help other women stop seeking approval outside of themselves and instead cultivate a deep sense of love, safety and confidence from within. Incredibly powerful story. Lesley Logan 14:55  Really, enjoy her. I really, really did I, when we were doing the conversation was like, oh my gosh, how many other places can I help you be heard? Because, like, you're just doing great work. One of the things I love that she said, Is your inner glow is radiating in your own love and respect so much that it's actually radiating to people outside of you. So like, when you really get that inner glow on, like, it's kind of like, it's like when people talk about you and you're not in the room, but it's all good. You know what I mean? Like, they like, they think about you, and they just start, oh, have you heard of this person? Like, because, like, your inner glow is so out there. People can't help but, like, pick up on it and, like, radiate it out as well. Brad Crowell 15:32  Well, she's also talking about, like, the people around her saying, oh, you're glowing. And she said she didn't think like that it was anything particularly external that they were seeing, they were attracting. She was, you know, because her, her mindset was shifting so much it, you know, everyone was picking up on it, and that's when they were saying, you're glowing.Lesley Logan 15:58  I know it's weird. This is how Angie and I are very different. She was glowing from the inside out and radiating out people are like you're glowing oh my skincare line is so good. But like, but she you when, if you watch her, you'll see like, she's just got such joy around her, and she's so connected to the work that she does and how it helped her so that she's helping others. And she emphasized that energy doesn't just stop at the individual. Energy extends outward, inspiring others and potentially raising the vibration of the entire universe. And you know, I'm into that, because I believe that if you do Pilates, you connect yourself. You're more connected to yourself. You're not an asshole, if you're not an asshole, then other people aren't gonna be met with an asshole. Brad Crowell 16:36  It's one less asshole in the world. Do Pilates. Lesley Logan 16:38  And that's gonna change the vibration. Yeah. I'm in, I'm in.Brad Crowell 16:41  More Pilates, less assholes.Lesley Logan 16:42  Yeah. So she argued that you're either contributing to the world's negative vibration or you're raising it. And I agree. You're, I don't think that there's like a middle ground. You're either contributing or you're raising it. And I do, she also said that radiant self-love is a way to combat the chaos and negativity happening in the world right now. You guys while we're recording this, there's a fucking ton of shit going on, impossible to describe. It's like, when people ask, How am I doing? I have to go.Brad Crowell 17:09  Compartmentalize first, then answer. Lesley Logan 17:12  Yeah. Like, well, if we take what's going on in the world out, I'm doing great. I'm doing amazing. If you're gonna add that back in? I don't even know how to answer that question, but, like, but I do think that, like, it is something we can do with that bubble of influence that we can have, you know? Brad Crowell 17:30  Yeah, absolutely. All right. So when she was talking about that, there's a light inside of us that, you know, I found that really interesting, like resonating to me. And I think, like, part of it is, also, I have a couple thoughts, it's kind of like charisma, right? We don't realize, realize the risk, yeah, it's risk. We don't realize how impactful it is or or can be, and when we are, when we are not putting ourselves first, or we are seeking perfectionism, like even if it's subconsciously or people pleasing, we're dimming our own light. And for her, she said she told us the story about when she almost died, she was with her friend, and she said to her friend, I can't believe I'm not dead. And her friend's response was, it's not your time to go, right? And she said there was something in that moment that, like, really snapped her out of everything that she'd been doing for decades. And she, shortly thereafter, you know, started making dramatic life changes and leaving her job and things like that. And she, she she said that, you know, I think when people started to see the shift in her, the glow, they were talking about, you know, because she said, we are born with the light inside of us, but we just, we let it get dimmed.Lesley Logan 18:53  It does. It gets dimmed because of, like, things her parents say, they're, they're, they mean well, but like, you know, you talk too much, or you're just, you take too much attention, like your you know, like you be quiet, and then, like, those are, like, all appropriate things, but like, you start to internalize them, depending on who you are. And then a teacher tells you, like, oh, that was so stupid, but you took it as I'm stupid. And then, like, a boss is all of a sudden, it's like layers upon layers of these things that you internalize, and your light just gets dimmer and dimmer. Because some unless you have people around you to turn it back up, you know, or you do, you got to turn it back up. So I agree, and it just gets hard.Brad Crowell 19:30  Yeah, I think ultimately, her argument was that a lot of the self-help stuff, she really said she did a lot of it, like trying to, yeah, like, figure things out. This is, like, before the move. She's, you know, she said she did a lot of that stuff in her 30s, and basically, she said it's almost always an external change that they're recommending. And she, what she discovered was it was actually going internal that allowed her to see who she is and understand, you know, the value that she has, and began to change things, you know? So she said, it's about coming back home to who you actually are. Instead of trying to change all these things that are you're doing, or in your life, or all these external things, it's internal, you know?Lesley Logan 20:16  Yeah, no, it is. I mean, like, going back to, like, love thigh self, right? Like, your external body is going to change. And yes, there's arguments of, like, I just want to be attracted to the person when I'm younger. That's a different story, but you're the actual outside of you is going to change. So if all you're ever working on is the outside stuff, you're missing out, like the inside is, like, ideally, just gets brighter and more profound and more knowledgeable and more connected and more in tuned. You know, we have a series coming up about listening to your inner voice, your intuition, and one of the things you can't have intuition is if you don't have experience. So that's why, when you're younger, you don't have the intuition that you have when you're older, because you don't have life experiences around certain things. And I think that like as we get older, like, that's one thing we have that we didn't have we were younger. It's like this sense of experience of what's real. I like that she emphasizes, like, going inward and getting to know that.Brad Crowell 21:10  Yeah, it's just fascinating to listen to her, and also a little bit shocking, because I didn't see that part of her story in who she is today, you know? And so it was really interesting, because it kind of took me by surprise, but also, wow, how much has she learned from that experience? So stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to talk about those really powerful Be It Action Items that we had with Angie Hawkins. Brad Crowell 21:38  All right, y'all welcome back. We're going to dig into these Be It Action Items we have with Angie. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from that convo? And she said strong boundaries is like one of the most important things. It's huge. And she said the hard part is not setting the boundaries. The hard part is enforcing the boundaries right so you can make all the boundaries you want up in your head. If you blow past them, it doesn't matter, right? And she said, there's also people who will intentionally try to walk over the boundaries that you're setting, and, you know, and, and they'll just try to, like, there's something weird about it. Like people like to break the rules and press, you know, they like to press their luck, all those kinds of things. And for her today, her boundaries are usually mostly, well, what you discussed was mostly around her work. She's like, yeah, I just don't coach people on the weekends. And she said that when people will ask, she'll just tell them, oh, sorry, yeah, I don't coach on the weekends. And she said, if they really press me on that, they're probably not the person that I actually want as a client, because they're not just gonna push that boundary. They're gonna break everything, or do none of the work that I'm working on them with, like, all those kinds of things. And she's like, yeah, so. Lesley Logan 22:52  We're just talking about this with our friend Michael, who like, also, like coaches people and, like, some of the things that people, like, expect of things and like, they just push and push. And you're like, okay, I'll do this. Okay, I'll make this what's just what this one time? And it's like, actually, it's not like, I remember when I first started teaching Pilates, people thought I was crazy because I wouldn't offer a discount to people who pay in cash. And I'm like, so what happens when one time, they're like, oh, I don't have cash. Can I just pay for a check today? And then they're like, oh, it's the same price, right? Because this is one time, yeah, it's like, it's never, just one fucking time, never, never. It's like, let me just see what I can get away with. And, you know, I'm not saying they're all trying to be nefarious. I don't think it's a conscious thing. I think it's like, sometimes subconscious. Brad Crowell 23:32  Yeah, you know, you just have to be able to say, no, sorry.Lesley Logan 23:36  Also, if you don't know if that person's pressing you, you can also say, can I get back to you? And then that way you can take a moment to see, is this some, is this a boundary that they're crossing?Brad Crowell 23:46  Honestly, that was one of the best ways to get out of a tough situation is like, can I, can I think about that and get back to you? And to just say that, because it gives you space where you don't feel pressured to make a decision in the moment that you will you know might regret later, and it allows you the space to, you know, actually, like, like, mull it over and decide, what do I actually want to do? And then obviously, you still have to go back to him and respond, but it takes away that in the moment pressure, you know, yeah. What about you?Lesley Logan 24:17  Okay. This is great. Get ready. Write this down. Three-step process for personal transformation. This is Angie Hawkins, three-step process for personal transformation.Brad Crowell 24:25  I love this, by the way.Lesley Logan 24:26  Decide any meaningful change in your life comes from a decision.Brad Crowell 24:30  Yeah, decide you have to do it. Have to decide.Lesley Logan 24:33  Without total commitment, the wishy washy energy leads to quitting the second it gets hard. 100%. Decide, you can't make a wrong decision. It's gonna get you to where you're gonna go. You're gonna learn something. Take action. It's all about feeling the fear and doing it anyway, which is also in conjunction with part three. But hello, if you listen to this podcast, you know that action brings clarity, it's the same. And then part three, nervous system regulation. Before you take action, prime your nervous system. You can do that by sitting up straight. Breathing. And she also suggested the goddess walk is walking into a space with ownership, regardless of internal anxiety. Brad Crowell 25:07  I have arrived. Lesley Logan 25:08  Exactly, exactly. I really, I think that if I think that it's.Brad Crowell 25:12  They're very practical. You know, it's great. Lesley Logan 25:14  Anyone could do this. Decide, take action, regulate your nervous system. Yeah, walk like the goddess that you fucking are. Brad Crowell 25:22  Yeah, today I had to get up really early for a doctor's appointment, and last night, I decided I will wake up at, you know, this time so that I can make it on time to the thing. And you know, my alarm was accidentally soft. Don't know why it was soft, but somehow I heard it and I woke up. Lesley Logan 25:42  Well, it's good you made that decision. Oh, thank god because you didn't text me. And so when you came into the yoga you're like, bye, and I'm like, he got himself up, okay. Brad Crowell 25:50  Up and out. Lesley Logan 25:51  All right. He's, he's on it. He's doing it.Brad Crowell 25:54  Something amazing about making a decision.Lesley Logan 25:56  Well, I couldn't agree more. Go check out Angie Hawkins, I think she's wonderful. I'm Lesley Logan. Brad Crowell 26:01  And I'm Brad Crowell. Lesley Logan 26:02  Thank you so much for listening to us today. We're really grateful for you. We're so excited for what you're being it till you see it. We hope these guests have been helping you, and we want you to send in your questions, your wins, all that kind of stuff to beitpod.com/questions. Send this to a friend who needs to hear it, like truly, I think Angie's story can resonate with so many different women right now, and I think it's really important, so please, please spread the word about her and until next time, Be It Till You See It. Brad Crowell 26:25  Bye for now. Lesley Logan 26:26  That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.Brad Crowell 27:09  It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.Lesley Logan 27:14  It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.Brad Crowell 27:18  Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.Lesley Logan 27:25  Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.Brad Crowell 27:28  Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.Brad Crowell 27:44  Okay, welcome back. This is episode 671, Angie Hawkins recap. Take it away.Lesley Logan 27:52  I feel like a blowfish, feel like a blowfish.Brad Crowell 28:05  Welcome back. Just kidding, we're not doing that. All right, y'all welcome back. Okay, all right, so what I really loved was what she's talking about, being. Lesley Logan 28:22  Sorry.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy