Make Your Damn Bed

NOTE: this is a rerun of episode 1059 because of some life stuff. I should be back tomorrow!If I've learned anything from getting older, it's that we're all middle managers of our emotions, our energies, our moods, our feelings, and our experiences.I've had a lot of different types of managers in the past that have taught me things about how I showed Innman and by recognizing my own capabilities and limitations and knowing what I actually enjoy as a manager I could slowly start to enjoy the process of managing my moods, emotions, energy, and so on the second, I could separate a traditional managing role from the thousands of different types of managing there really is in this world that can often feel really fulfilling and profitable and progressive managing styles.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You are good enough. You've always been good enough. You'll always be good enough. There's always more to do, but that does NOT mean you haven't done enough. If we started truly believing that, the economy as we know it, would crumble. And I dunno, maybe that's a good thing. Decentering your "beauty" makes you more beautiful. Do you know how much time, energy, and money can be freed up when you say "this is good enough"? You are perfect, right here, right now. You have to know this. Don''t ever forget it. Reclaim your attention and focus on the shit that actually matters. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most people have very small margins. There's very little time/energy/money to focus on anything beyond basic survival. But for those of us with access to any margins (even tiny ones), we must be willing to expound upon them, exploit them, and set ourselves up for even larger ones down the line. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The most successful strikes, boycotts, resistance, and activism has stemmed from people willing to be brave, think differently, and utilize the protection of the margins they're living in. There are certain privileges that some of us are afforded, that can provide us with a "safety net" of protection in our acts of intentional resistance. As more of our safety nets are removed, we are less protected when we rebel against the system. The point is to limit our power through limiting our resources and ability to act freely. Pay attention to the margins and protections you do have access to, and see what you can exploit within them to stretch them for others to exist in the same space. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We live in a dictatorship of capital. These "powerful" thieves have ingratiated themselves into every aspect of our existence. For us to push back, we'd need to decenter capital, but the system has set us up to be trapped in it. The key is centering community. Not ourselves. There's a "third space" between escaping completely and participating willingly with the worst parts. Co-creating stability and safety through new ways that we've never imagined before. The creation of a "third option" is overwhelming and seemingly hopeless work, but only when we force ourselves to do it alone. It will always be uncomfortable, but there should be comfort in knowing your discomfort is for the betterment of the world, as opposed to the fortification of the worst parts of it. A more just world is available, we just have to remember we have the power to foster it, together. Start small. Think about the choices you have available, and question them. Are there secret options you've been unable to see? Are there ways to create spaciousness where there appear to be walls? Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As we become more disillusioned, pay attention to the ways you can push back or pivot or adapt. The reality of our current situation is darker than any of us can imagine, and we need to stop pretending like things can "return to normal" because the "normal" has revealed itself to be unreasonably evil. we must be willing to address the truth now, so we can co-create a better truth moving forward. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"If the machine of government is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law." - Henry David ThoreauIn a world that shares none of my values, I must be willing to stand apart from it. It is uncomfortable, but less uncomfortable than assimilating to a culture that is in direct opposition to my personal morality. Ideally, our individual search for a "third space", will lead to a collective embracing of it. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's not healthy (or "sane") to follow the social norms of an unhealthy (or "insane") society. There is a third (secret) space available for us to boycott, sabotage, and refuse to align with what is wrong with the current "norms" but we have to be willing to look at the world differently to see it. We don't have to decide between escape and compliance. There is a middle ground that can push back against the worst aspects of our culture, and inspire others to seek out their own freewill and autonomy to do the same. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Contemplation and participation are not mutually exclusive. We need to create space so we can see reality more clearly and orient ourselves towards what we really want. That said, we cannot renounce the world forever, if we want to be a part of a better one. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The pull to escape is inherent in any of us living in our current hellscape, but what if we escaped-in-place by backing out of the future the ruling class is insisting upon, and instead, tapped into a future of our own creation. Utopia doesn't exist. But a better world is available to those of us who are willing to abandon the current reality that curates harm as a way of control."Peace is an endless negotiation between two agents whose will cannot be engineered." - Jenny O'DellGet Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The concept of a matriarchy is far more nuanced and empowering than a basic ass reversal of patriarchal roles. There is a prioritization of balance over dominance, inclusion over exclusion, communal wellbeing over individual accumulation of power, environmental stewardship over endless growth, and a holistic/inclusive approach that considers impact in all areas rather than one. THE SOURCES AND INSPIRATION:https://nativeamericantribes.info/what-is-native-american-matriarchyhttps://pediaa.com/what-is-the-difference-between-matrilineal-and-matriarchal/https://www.projectmatrilineal.org/resourceshttps://nativeamericantribes.info/what-is-native-american-matriarchy/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The extent of a society's development is most clearly reflected in the freedom women enjoy, and in the extent to which they are able to express their creativity. - heide goettner-abendrothTHE SOURCES AND INSPIRATION:The Main Article: Gift Economy https://pediaa.com/what-is-the-difference-between-matrilineal-and-matriarchal/https://www.projectmatrilineal.org/resourceshttps://nativeamericantribes.info/what-is-native-american-matriarchy/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the late 60's a bunch of hippie communes popped up across the US, and the ideals were beautiful... but sadly shortlived and often filled with conflict because they focused on escapism instead of true collaboration. If we avoid politics as a way to resist tyranny, we may end up fostering a different form of tyranny. Similarly to the tolerance paradox: Governance can by tyrannical but so can non-governance. THE SOURCES AND INSPIRATION:Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Info on Walden Two by B.F. Skinner: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walden_TwoSome extra information on the 60's commune movement: https://bohotude.com/hippie-communes-of-the-1960s-their-origins-legacy-and-what-we-can-learn-today/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Stupidity is an attempt to iron out all differences, and not to use them or value them creatively.”“Each such cycle is a unique event; diet, choice, selection, season, weather, digestion, decomposition and regeneration differ each time it happens. Thus, it is the number of such cycles, great and small, that decide the potential for diversity. We should feel ourselves privileged to be part of such eternal renewal. Just by living we have achieved immortality — as grass, grasshoppers, gulls, geese and other people. We are of the diversity we experience in every real sense. “If, as physical scientists assure us, we all contain a few molecules of Einstein, and if the atomic particles of our physical body reach to the outermost bounds of the universe, then we are all de facto components of all things. There is nowhere left for us to go if we are already everywhere, and this is, in truth, all we will ever have or need. If we love ourselves at all, we should respect all things equally, and not claim any superiority over what are, in effect, our other parts. Is the hand superior to the eye? The bishop to the goose? The son to the mother?... - BILL MOLLISONTHE SOURCES AND INSPIRATION:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Permaculturehttps://www.pbssocal.org/shows/tending-nature/the-indigenous-science-of-permaculturehttps://www.permaculture.org.uk/articles/whitewashed-hopehttps://queenoftheforest.org/forever-the-forest/permaculture-in-the-forest-indigenous-models-of-sustainable-agriculture/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

My friends and I don't "keep score". We help each other when and where we can because we can. This is community. This is the village. We have to decenter "money" exchange where possible, so we can prioritize real care. "Capitalism's incentives are fundamentally backwards. Under this system, you make money by keeping people sick (pharmaceutical companies), by keeping people in debt (financial institutions), by destroying the environment (fossil fuel companies), and by keeping people desperate enough to accept poverty wages (pretty much every major corporation).Real incentives for human flourishing would reward teachers, caregivers, firefighters, and farmers—the people who actually keep society running—not financial speculators who contribute nothing but extract wealth from everyone else's work" - https://newsletters.noticenews.com/p/a-glimpse-into-the-futureTHE INSPIRATION:https://www.lowimpact.org/posts/replacing-capitalism-the-why-what-how-and-who-of-growing-the-commons-economy/http://localharvest.org/https://newsletters.noticenews.com/p/a-glimpse-into-the-futurehttps://commonslibrary.org/https://www.nal.usda.gov/farms-and-agricultural-production-systems/community-supported-agriculturehttps://www.depressionscrip.comhttps://www.mutualcredit.services/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today we're talking Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) boxes. Depending on your area, it may be a great way to get fresh food more locally and sustainably, while investing back into your community access points. THE INSPIRATION: https://www.lowimpact.org/posts/replacing-capitalism-the-why-what-how-and-who-of-growing-the-commons-economy/http://localharvest.org/https://newsletters.noticenews.com/p/a-glimpse-into-the-futurehttps://commonslibrary.org/https://www.nal.usda.gov/farms-and-agricultural-production-systems/community-supported-agricultureRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The focus is on repair. There is a necessity of missing out that allows us The focus is on self care. Self preservation. It's also a way to improve and deepen listening. Productivity isn't just producing something new. It's maintenance + sustenance work. It's care work with no "tangible" numbers to track or changes to measure. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The labor movement fought and died for our right to time off to just exist. To do what we will. The gig economy is taking that back with the illusion of "freedom" and I have fallen for it. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Build an attention holding architecture: where it's safe to simply exist. where you can learn to attune to what matters. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We've been taught to view "productivity" and "worth" and "value" through a capitalistic lens. What if we change our interpretations of these things? What if we start to include "presence" and "experience" as worthwhile ways to be productive and add value to our lives?Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The world is so make it about interaction, instead. The attention economy has spent billions making their product irresistible while convincing us it's our idea to be there. Resist your fear of being perceived. Jump timelines and do something different. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here. Buy Jenny Odell's book here. Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When I act in alignment with my core values I feel more confident but what if the decisions I'm stuck with leave me with no choice but to make choices that don't align and dont fit my desired values for the future? The beauty of judging the choices I had rather than the decision I made, is that it opens me up to the nuanced reality. It's not about perfect alignment because that's not possible or available but it's about attunement. Alignment with context. You're not discovering your values, you're practicing them. Doing what you can, learning from the mistakes, and not being so analytical and precise. This whole universe is chaos. We can, realistically, make sense of very little.So instead of trying to solve a puzzle that doesn't exist, just practice existing. Practice staying present as often as possible. Practice moving with the inherent knowledge that things only get better when we start doing better, where we are, with the context we're given. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

CORE INSIGHTS FROM THE BOOK, "FOUR THOUSAND WEEKS": Embrace finitude: Your life is absurdly short (around 4,000 weeks). Stop trying to “master” time; instead, accept your fundamental limitations.Productivity is a trap: Becoming more efficient only creates more demands, leading to perpetual busyness, not freedom.Choice means sacrifice: Every decision to do one thing means sacrificing countless others. True meaning comes from consciously choosing what to neglect.Control is an illusion: You can't control the future or prevent pain. Releasing the demand for certainty is the path to peace.Attention is life: What you pay attention to is what your life will have been. Digital distractions, often a flight from discomfort, steal your life by commandeering your attention.Rest is not a means to an end: Leisure has intrinsic value and should not be justified by its productivity benefits. Embrace “wasteful” idleness.Patience is power: The ability to let things take the time they take is a crucial skill in a hurry-driven world, leading to deeper engagement and creativity.Communal time is valuable: Excessive individual temporal freedom leads to loneliness. Meaning often arises from synchronizing your time with others.Cosmic insignificance is liberating: You don't need to make a “dent in the universe.” Accepting your irrelevance frees you from impossible standards and allows you to find meaning in ordinary life.Life is a series of insoluble problems: The “human disease” is the belief that there's a cure for life's inherent difficulties. Freedom comes from accepting them.Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We can control our vessel, not the ocean. Life's default state is a little scary. A little insecure. A little worried. A little vulnerable to the elements. The good news is, those scary vulnerable unavoidable feelings don't have to be all encompassing and can be made less powerful through direct recognition and balance. The future is still in progress, so I can and should be doing what I can to make it better and more approachable and more enjoyable and more comfortable and more sustainable but I also should not be wasting my one beautiful and temporary life freaking out about everything that could go wrong. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm slowly realizing that the key wasn't to get "more free time for myself", the key is to get "more free time together". The highlight should be: Communal rhythm. Coordinated leisure. Planned connection. Shared ritual. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Build your tolerance for "chill" and "ease" by scheduling it. Prioritize doing nothing productive. Seek out ways to create that don't have a "payoff" and make it anyway. My addiction to "motion" to "movement" to constant "stimulation" is normal, daily tasks feel like a physically painful burden. Consider discipline as a form of devotion, not a form of punishment. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When work became “the real point of existence,” leisure's purpose became for “recovery and replenishment.” This meant the whole of life was valued for something else, in the future, not for itself. Accept that everything is random and impossible to predict. The only part of time that is "our business" is the present moment. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The human experience is finite, but that is terrifying. So we distract ourselves. We convince ourselves that if we just "do everything perfectly all the time" we can avoid the painful reality of life's limitations. But refusing to make a choice is a choice. Not committing is a commitment.Not settling is settling. There's some shit you'll never get to. There's some shit you'll never do perfectly. But for some things, done is better than perfect. The only way to ensure it gets done is to commit to it. Limit your works in progress and focus on prioritizing things that actually matter. Don't resist all distraction, see if you can choose better ones. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“A world which increasingly consists of destinations without journeys between them, a world which values only ‘getting somewhere' as fast as possible, becomes a world without substance.“ - Alan Watts When convenience drains an activity of its meaning, it becomes less valuable. - Oliver BurkemanAccess the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Modern industries thrive on offering convenience, eliminating “pain points” or “friction” from daily life. Uber, Apple Pay, and food delivery services smooth out mundane chores. However, this smoothness is a dubious virtue." When convenience drains an activity of its meaning, it becomes less valuable. Access the book, Four Thousand Weeks: https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeksThe synopsis of the book, here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“You pity the moth for confusing a lamp for the moon but here you are confusing a screen for the world.” - JAY ALTO “The really important kind of freedom involves attention, and awareness, and discipline, and effort, and being able truly to care about other people and to sacrifice for them, over and over, in myriad petty little unsexy ways, every day." - David Foster WallaceDavid Foster Wallace's "This is Water" Speech. Brad Stulberg's The Way of Excellence Substack. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We know that Breathwork, nourishment, sleep, and a safe environment regulate your nervous system. Play regulates your nervous system, too. Touch regulates your nervous system, sensory deprivation does too.Nature regulates your nervous system, so does being around community. Travel regulates your nervous system, and so does returning to your home. Routine can regulate your nervous system, and so can spontaneity. Both stillness and movement, sunlight and moonlight, predictability and novelty.It's nuanced and paradoxical and it's about you staying conscious and flexible. It's about embodying what you want to feel. I think the key is balancing what works. And if you're alive, you've already been doing that. Maybe not healthily or sustainably, but you've been doing it. It's never gonna be the easiest work, but you can make it easier. By relaxing into it. Letting everything become an experiment and only allowing your experience guide you, not trap you into thinking you can't handle it differently. “There will always be more to do. The cleaning and laundry won't stop. The inbox will refill. The to-do list will rewrite itself overnight. But your life isn't just a series of tasks to complete. Go for the walk. Call your friend. Slow down without trying to optimize the moment. You dont need to clear your entire life before you're allowed to feel ease. Because if that's the rule, ease will never come. So learn to pause in the middle of it, not at the end of it.” - Vex King Watch the Eliza Day Video HereRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The goal is conscious choices > conditioned responses. Our society bases it's values on exploitation, violation, and extraction - and we've been letting that society convince us of what parts of ourselves are palatable, acceptable, and welcome. But we can't depend on a broken society to share wisdom to make us less broken. You get to prove it's safe to “decide” for yourself what parts of yourself are worth exploring and embodying and which are worth censoring. Rather than allowing society to decide the barriers for us. When you practice approaching the line in a safe circumstance, you are gradually restoring the ability to choose. Your agency is slowly seeping back into those cracks, with every new approach. Watch the Eliza Day Video HereRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Don't forget to rehearse the best case scenario for every worst case scenario rehearsal. S - Stop! - Freeze! Your emotions may try to make you act without thinking. Stay in control! T - Take a step back! - Take a break. Let go. Take a breath. Reevaluate. O - Observe! - Notice what is going on inside and outside. What is the situation? What are your thoughts and feelings? What are others saying or doing?P - Proceed mindfully! - Act with awareness. Consider your thoughts and feelings, the situation, and other people's thoughts and feelings. Think about your values and goals. Ask Wise Mind: Which actions will make it better or worse?Today's resource is accessible here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Make a commitment to drop your usual escape methods as soon as you notice yourself doing them, and redirect. Maybe that looks like doing the opposite action, or it could be something subtle you do mentally, or say out loud to yourself, or write down, or tell someone else about. Today's resource is accessible here and here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Practice, patience, and persistence is required to reinforce the neural pathways you'd rather reinforce. Some distress is unavoidable, and you are fully capable of dealing with distress. Balance improving + acceptance. When you feel yourself self soothing with something negative, redirect. Practice creating space between your immediate reaction and your actual response. Show your brain it's safe to practice new reactions. Today's resource is accessible here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Coping with stress? No thanks. Avoiding stress? Yes please. I tend to use a combination platter of situational avoidance, numbing, reassurance seeking, over-planning, constant checking, and more! That said, it only creates more of a mess for me down the road.Something that has helped me sit with myself more honestly is to recognize that emotions and uncomfortable feelings come in waves. I can learn ways to ride them more joyfully, rather than trying to fight them or dodge them so terribly. The fear makes it worse. The avoidance makes the problem bigger. So I am learning to surf the waves through various options that depend on the context: Dive under and pop up refreshed and exhilarated. Body board or surf board (tools and resources available to make it fun) or Body surfing, trusting and allow the waves to guide you and you can bail when it's no longer serving your journey. Today's resource is accessible here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The more we fear, struggle with, and try to avoid any form of distress, generally the worse that distress gets. Distress intolerance remains due to certain beliefs they have developed about experiencing negative emotions. These beliefs tend to centre on the notion that negative emotion is bad in some way, unbearable, unacceptable, or will lead to disastrous consequences. These beliefs tend to make any negative emotion that we may feel, become a highly distressing emotional experience. Today's resource is accessible here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today's resource is accessible here. A negative emotion in itself is not necessarily distressing, we only begin to feel distressed when we evaluate our emotional experience as a bad thing.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Seeing traumatic symptoms as an interrupted natural response and as unreleased energy in the body rather than a disease can lift a burden for traumatized people. - Daniela Ramirez-DuranNoticing Physical Comfort – Feeling physical support and experiencing your physical boundaries in a safe space can bring feelings of comfort.Self-Soothing Touch – Boundaries are usually broken with trauma, and it is essential to recover this by working with the body. Touch can instill containment and create a soothing sensation.Soothing Breath – Breath and touch can help soothe both the body and the mind. Slow deep breathing can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, bringing a feeling of relaxation and calmness.Grounding and Centering – People commonly experience a loss of grounding and are thrown off balance. Grounding allows feelings of safety and inner strength to emerge.Evoking Kindness – Remembering a time when you experienced kindness from someone can evoke pleasant physical and emotional sensations.Recalling Being Yourself – Coming back to yourself can provide a greater sense of being grounded and feeling comfortable in your own skin.The Voo Sound – Making sounds and vibrations with your own voice can have a soothing effect on the body and can also be a means to discharge activation.Shake It Off – Animals often shake themselves to release the excess energy produced from the stress response. Allowing your body to connect with the trembling sensation produced by a stressful event can enable your system to settle.TODAY'S EPISODE CREDIT: https://positivepsychology.com/somatic-experiencing/https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/-/media/CCI/Consumer-Modules/Facing-Your-Feelings/Facing-Your-Feelings---01---Understanding-Distress-Intolerance.pdfRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Somatic Experiencing is a therapy that focuses on the mind-body connection to help alleviate trauma-related tension stored in the body.https://positivepsychology.com/somatic-experiencing/https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/-/media/CCI/Consumer-Modules/Facing-Your-Feelings/Facing-Your-Feelings---01---Understanding-Distress-Intolerance.pdfRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You can't outrun 'em, but you can revise your interpretation and your response, and that's not for nothin'.Access today's episode on Julie's Medium Blog.Shame spirals, or negative feedback loops are chain reactions starting with: The Trigger: something spurs a sense of emotionally activation or vulnerability; perhaps through a rejection, a crossed boundary, or a mistake.The Story: immediately your brain connects the triggering event to a past experience, creating a narrative on how to perceive this “slight” that tends towards self-blame and some sort of “proof that you are not worthy or capable.”The Reaction: next, your brain will attempt to protect yourself from the pain of this internalized toxic shame by over-performing or under-performing as a way to cope, furthering you from your authentic-self. i.e. fight/flight/freeze/fawnThe Reinforcement: you feel ashamed or disconnected from your authentic-self, so the narrative of feeling insufficient is reinforced, making us more sensitive to future triggers, and the cycle continues. Ideally, we can create space to gain some control over the narrative and redirect our reactions into more thoughtful responses that reinforce new, more positive patterns. Call it out: noting a shame spiral as it starts is a great way to stop it before it begins. Practice creating space between you and the response. Sometimes, this is enough to“unhook” yourself from the trigger and create a new chain of events. Ground: use a somatic exercise to regulate your nervous system. Reframe: recognize the feelings of shame as an attempt to feel safe, so you can guide yourself into a more effective response. Rewrite the narrative to better reflect reality, which is less shame based. Connect with someone more objective who can help you see more clearly, if needed. Redirect: take an action towards a more positive and loving response, that is not rooted in shame/punishment/fear. Realign: once you feel less triggered, reflect on the experience, and practice reinforcing more conscious responses in the future. Some shame is unavoidable, and a healthy level of shame is essential to being a decent human. That said, many of us are harboring toxic levels of shame on a daily basis.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's not about eliminating all sources of shame, but aligning with the confidence that you're able to handle it effectively. In the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw, he compares shame to a “demonic” presence that takes over our whole being. I think this is a valuable analogy, because the presence leaves very little room for our conscious response, if we don't recognize where we end and the “demon of shame” begins. Toxic shame is a liar. It's a menace. In order to exercise these demons, we must address them head on. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

you're not "finding" an authentic self, but rather, practicing ease and comfort when you feel it. "as soon as she touches the water, she is immediately transformed into the most graceful creature." find the water of your own belonging. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

dealing with rejection can feel impossible for people with internalized, toxic shame. there are rarely absolutes. life exists mostly in the gray area. not all good and not all bad.people will go to extremes to avoid toxic shame, so they will force themselves to make it "either/or" when it may be healthier to think that things are "both/and"it comes back to giving your "true self" unconditional love and respect. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you make a mistake and feel vulnerable, the best response is to acknowledge and repair. Don't harbor more shame. The mistakes are inevitable. You highlighting them makes the mistake seem like something worth worshipping, not something to learn from. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

stop being so hard on yourself!! YOU ARE NOT YOUR MISTAKES. Mistakes are simply feedback. Listen, take responsibility when needed, and adapt!!!! It's all part of the process. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You really are worth it. There has never been anyone like you. Nor will there ever be anyone like you again. You are unique, unrepeatable and of precious worth. - John Bradshaw John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

common cognitive distortions among shame-based people include: catastrophizing, mind-reading, all-or-nothing or either-or thinking, personalization, blaming, global blaming, filtering, cognitive bias affirmations, control thinking fallacies, "should" thinking, over generalizations, etc. to combat this we must: become active listeners, abandon comparison, abandon "shoulds" and absolutes. focus on curiosity and flexibility. create more space for "unknowns". John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Grief work: identify, build awareness, re-route with corrective responses. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Shame spirals tend to attach themselves to certain triggers or anchors we have created from our past experiences. If we are able to create safe, corrective anchors to attach to these triggers, we can avoid the spirals and instead, learn to ride the waves. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.