Cocktale Hour

 This is the last episode of the Spring, so we've packed it chock full of extra nonsense. Danny is oddly concerned about the environment, Kelly is ditching his gas stove and John just wants to make a quick buck by exploiting elderly porn stars...what else is new? Oh, we're also looking for a new intern so if you know someone....

 I'm resisting calling this episode the Frequent Jerkers Club or anything else do do with Social Security. Frankly, I don't want to have my passport flagged, although a light detention after a Tesla protest would give me more time to catch up on my reading. This episode posted a week late.

 We're back after a couple of weeks with renewed vigor. Are you tired of political bullshit and the pontificating opinions of Washington insiders worrying about your future? You've come to the right podcast because we only pontificate on how much money Danny could make on OnlyFans if he started a career as ......Speedo Man! Enjoy. Oh, if you want some Cocktale Hour Merch, search Cocktale Hour on the Etsy. I've got some stuff there.

 Another new theme song as we dig into the nuances of acting, Tyler Perry, De Niro and how great Yacht Rock really is. Stay safe and happy out there! If you need a Cocktale Hour t-shirt, check out the Etsy store.

 Today we talked more about AI than politics, thank you Jesus! I made a YouTube video so that you can see the images from the podcast. Either search Cocktale Hour Elephant Dresser, or go here: https://youtu.be/z3dlvquFK10

 Did you say new theme music that really embodies the 13 year olds that inhabit our old skeletons? You got it! We also dig into some political issues and edutainment as always. Enjoy!

 We are safe from the fires in LA so far, but not everyone has been so lucky. It is not Gavin Newsome's fault, and neither was it predicted in Genesis 19:23–29, so if you are not going to say it with love, don't say it.  We will say all the funny stuff, and we didn't even get to roll our out ejaculation notice joke. Rats. By the way, there is a new theme song courtesy of some AI audio generating website. I dig it.

Happy first podcast of 2025! They can't all be bangers, but if you are old and looking at life changes like we are, Kelly's Medicare adventure might be considered informative. Watch out for radicalized vets in 2025, that's my advice. 

 I wonder how we devolve from medical advice to dirty priest jokes, but what a fun way to end 2024. We talk about eating for your blood type, Johnny Depp's parenting, Sniffy's and how our kids listen to anyone but us. If you want a new, sexy Cocktale Hour t-shirt, reach out. What a gift for the loved ones in your life!

 Christmas Stress! It's the reason for the season, y'all. Once again we are here to educate and entertain and whether it is moral management of your portfolio, the radicalization of America's youth or another one of our numerous business ideas, you've really got to turn in to catch this lightning in a bottle.

 In the world of true crime and whodunits, we're no fun. I already know who shot that guy. His wife, it is always the spouse, no matter how much fun other options sound. We talk about our plans for world domination through the excellence of our podcast too, so tune in campers!

 John is finally back in town and we can record a new episode. It is our first post-election episode and we talk a little about that guy, but more about ED medication, old people on cruises and Thanksgiving Turkey. Enjoy!

 This is the last podcast before the election. Depending on who wins and the remnants of free speech, we remain hopeful to continue Cocktale Hour, bringing you some of the last truly independent educational and entertaining content! Enjoy our discussion about the guy who had a penis implanted into his eye socket.

I used NotebookLM to make a podcast about the AI generated summary about this week's podcast. Enjoy the redundancy! SummaryThe text is a recap of a conversation between John, Danny, and Kelly, where they explored various aspects of artificial intelligence (AI) technology, its potential impact on their lives, and the implications for their podcast. They discussed the use of AI tools for creating podcasts, generating images and videos, and even enhancing their professional endeavors. The conversation also touched on broader issues like the future of work, the potential for AI-generated content to be misused, and the benefits and drawbacks of relocating to Eastern Canada.

 This week John plays an AI generated podcast clip of Cocktale Hour as reviewed by fake hosts. In an era of not knowing who you can trust, I guess we are unique, and you can trust us to be just as real as ever. I'm also posting an AI-generated podcast about this week's podcast as well as another, more serious AI podcast about an AP News article. Enjoy the 3-fer!

 Using Google's NotebookLM, I generated a podcast based on an AP News article about disinformation around the flooding in the western North Carolina mountains. 

 Danny is getting ready for his cruise and Kelly expresses a real interest in secret plastic surgery. Join us for another educational discussion about fashion, advanced degrees and political bullshit.

 What would we do with $11.1 Billion. Probably make some boring choices, but we'd be happier than the rich are today. We go deep on some billionaire issues, the American Dream, low cost burial and the 1976 Bandit Trans-Am.

 For episode 170, we talk about our kids. What a relief when we're gone and they can hire an estate sale company to sell all our shit! We talk about religion, but not politics, so you get a break this week!

 More religion and politics coming at you in an election cycle, and we din't even get to the fake ear injury this week. Get ready to vote people!

 From a neighbor shooting movies in his yard to Japanese Exchange students to getting a massage at the mall. Is nothing Sacred? Don't forget to register to vote.

 Our AI generated synopsis says: In this episode, the group reflects on their latest social outings and debates the new AI tool designed to summarize discussions. They dive into intriguing topics such as the consequences of being a Secret Service agent under Trump, a surge in campaign donations, the effects of processed foods, and the evolving role of AI in writing and the workforce. Evidently, AI is too polite to mention penises.

 Some of us watched the RNC theatrical presentation and thought that it was a testament to how many public-facing politicians and newscasters were full-on Ozempic users and how these candidates are really old, but wouldn't it be better to vote for someone really old like a vampire?

 What drives all the young influencers to our podcast? It's the wisdom we offer for free! Here is some more tasty life advice, so join us for another episode of The Cocktale Hour.

 Summer is here and one change it brings is a serious reduction in weed usage. We've got a comedy club review and as always, ideas for how people can live a better life. Join us!

 This week, Danny has the greatest idea for stopping all wars while providing elderly citizens health care and retirement benefits! Danny for President, 2024. Oh yeah, TikTok dances too.

 Happy June Everybody! Kelly pursues happiness and John reveals the Jesus/Trump connection - on sale now! We pride ourselves on comedy and education every episode, so enjoy.

 We're back with more questions and even a few answers. From trailers in Alabama to the Amalfi Coast, get all your future retirement strategies here! Try to be happy wherever you are!

 Kelly is vibing on the Jon Bon Jovi documentary and Danny is working a big construction project as we celebrate episode 160. Stay safe out there as you navigate protests and long Covid.

Some celebrity podcasters recently sold our exact format to SiriusXM for $100 Million. How much is our little show worth, maybe a lifetime supply of Canadian beer? Join us for an educational discussion on what would happen if Viagra made your unit double in size. 

 This week we talk about growing up in small towns and what we learned. Evidently that chicks liked the Saturday Night Fever vibe of the 70's. Join us on an educational trip down memory lane...

 Friday Margarita Night comes to you live. Rather than just the 3 of us, we invite 3 totally random women to join us in the kitchen for drinks and laughs. Names were changed to protect the innocent!

 What do old guys fantasize about? Evidently getting an RV and dreaming of turning the whole repair experience into a new reality show. Go figure. Also, if you want help during the cold and flu season, turn to ActiveHerb...not a sponsor.

 Did you know that John is an AI expert and regularly lectures people...or is it randomly lectures people? Anyway, we talk a little about new generative AI stuff and how it is poised to change Hollywood as well as small town TV which I think is infinitely better. Enjoy!

 Is Taylor prepared to save America, or does she resent you for hating on her for her 38 seconds of air time in an NFL game? We discuss this as we also dive into other important topics like master guitar player/actor Jerry Reed and the meaning of life and assisted suicide. Call someone today if you need help, otherwise...enjoy!

 It sucks getting old. Kelly's arms are worn out and Danny has a bum foot, but we can still laugh. Kelly is offering a cash prize to anyone that can heal his elbows. Let us know at cocktalehour@yahoo.com if you have an answer. As always we have tons of money making ideas including how to sell a movie for 20 grand and make a profit. Cocktale Hour for the win!

 This week we talk about how Tesla owners should get out of their cars at the superchargers, come on and create community, you rich bastards! Danny is on his own and Kelly remembers dragging things out of a hole in the floor of his '77 Chevette.

 Cocktale Hour has become a global phenomenon, not because of the well-rehearsed, tired banter of the other celebrity podcasts, but because we connect with our listener through impromptu, timely topics. For example my decision to call some ex-president "Fat Hitler." It is a rare case that we'd bring a prepared topic to share with you, but I had to get that dog shit at Aldi's - yes it was Aldi - story out. Dog Shit. In the grocery store. That shouldn't be a thing I have to report on.

 Happy almost Christmas everyone! We had a big wedding yesterday and we talk about how John can capitalize on making money out of religious services. The key, unfortunately is his learning to walk and talk simultaneously on camera. Can you believe that we've done 150 of these?

 Can ChatGPT make a photo of John's dead dog frolicking in Heaven? Hell yes it can. We talk about weddings, AI assisted services and how it does not use as much profanity as I do. That's where the comedy is.

 Thanksgiving is over and we are looking forward to Christmas. Relive your childhood stuffing recipe with us as we talk about fake vs. real trees. Who is Aunt Geoffrey? Your guess is as good as mine.

Happy Thanksgiving to all our listeners! We are celebrating by wondering why there is no Thanksgiving song, especially set to Knights in White Satin. Thank the Lord that Danny doesn't have covid after his New York trip. We talk about subway homeless, getting a bunch of shots and and the immigration situation around 90 Day Fiancee. Enjoy!

 More New York tales with Danny and Dave this week as we dive into caviar prices, luxury cars and the rich! I've also started uploading old episodes again, so check out some of our pre-Covid laughs.

 Recording on a Sunday this time because Danny had the big yard sale yesterday and we talk about the eternal fight of what you save and what you leave for your own estate sale. 

 John is back from New York with product ideas and we discuss what the future of religious gatherings could look like. Enjoy!

 What keeps these old farts in government going...we have an idea. Also we talk about the conflict in Israel and all the SAG insurance stuff you ever wanted to know. Hang in there.

Missed us? After 2 months we are back in action with some great ideas. John's cruise turned into another fantastic idea for what to do when you are going to die, and we came up with a new reality show idea about a town full of swingers that don't do Ancestry.com.

 As we prepare for Hurricane Hillary, we talk about her 2016 opponent and the chances that he doesn't run off to his brethren in Moscow. Book banning is my new hobby and I want to see how I can get involved to ban the bible in each Christian™️community. That'll teach them a lesson! 

 In the immortal words of Khloe Kardashian, "It's been a minute." We're back with more pontification for you. Danny and John saw the Barbie movie and have thoughts about the future of the studio business. It's good to be back.

 It's tough to stick to a schedule this summer! We're back and as always with even more information for our listeners. Stay close as we drop pearls of wisdom!

 We're back. I need to stop going out of town so that we can have more regular episodes. This week we talk about birthday parties, school board meetings and The Seagull performed with a gender-fluid cast. As always, we're about education!